#also im feeling far better :3
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Hello
I drop biblically accurate davesport :]
#miles art#dsaf#day shift at freddy's#dsaf dave#dave miller#dsaf jack#jack kennedy#dsaf davesport#davesport#its midnight ahshhdjdb#im still drawing these fuckers#also im feeling far better :3#thanks for the ppl that showed me support <3#i hope to give y'all sum more gay ass content
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it's weird that you don't call out to jun when he comes into your apartment. jun knows that you know he was coming over at some point to spend time with you, and usually you greet him in some way when you hear the apartment door unlock. he's a little earlier than he planned, but you told him to 'come over whenever' and now he's a little worried that you didn't mean it. he quietly slips into the pair of slippers that stays here at your place, and makes his way further into your apartment to set down the bag of groceries he brought on your kitchen counter. your bedroom door is open, but the tiny room you use as a home office is open just a sliver.
he makes his way over, leaning in to listen for a moment... only to hear your voice. there's a little strain to it as you struggle through a sentence, and it clicks all at once: you're speaking chinese. albeit not very well (it's clear to jun that this is one-hundred percent new to you), but you're still trying. your pronunciation is a bit clumsy, but he can hear the way you try to use the right tone with what you're saying...
when did you start learning this much? jun had taught you little things in the past--the absolute basics, really, plus a few other little phrases that veer into his own cheesy need to hear you say sweet things--but this...? he steps back from the door. why hadn't you told him? you could have told him and he'd happily help you learn. but he trusts you: you must have your reasons to keep this a secret, so he won't push. he steps away, deciding to busy himself with getting ingredients put away--or set up for the two of you to cook together, in case you're hungry now.
then he knocks a cup into the sink, and immediately he hears you coming out of your office. relief crosses your face when you see it's just jun, and you lean against the open doorway.
"i didn't know you were here." you pause, and then he sees you get hit with realization. "... how long were you here?"
"i just got here," he says. it's technically the truth, isn't it? he's only been here for a few minutes. "were you working?"
you nod. "yeah. just had to answer a phone call," you lie to him, but he just nods and acts like he doesn't know that. you come up to his side, wrapping an arm around him. "is this for lunch?"
he leans over to you and presses a kiss against your cheek. "are you hungry?"
"mhm," you just snuggle in for a moment, enjoying his presence. "you should teach me more recipes you learned from your mom sometime."
jun finds himself smiling already. was that what this all was...? an attempt for you to understand him better? to show that you care for him so much that you want to know his culture, too? "i'd love to," he says softly, and wraps an arm around you to tug you closer to his side. "only if you teach me things you learned from your family, too."
then he'll make more efforts to understand you and your background, too. just to show you that he loves you as much as you love him.
#nonranghaes.thoughts#nonranghaes.svt#seventeen imagine#seventeen x reader#seventeen x you#svt x reader#svt imagine#svt x you#jun x reader#wen junhui x reader#junhui x reader#jun fluff#junhui fluff#also im just gonna ramble for a second. if i ever get to the point where i feel more comfortable speaking..... god i wish id have a jun#to help me learn the language better. its been interesting to learn so far!!#i def need to start taking notes tho bc guess who cannot count <3#anyway i fucking love learning languages. inject tht shit directly into my veins.#yknow the post with all the pills w associated abilities??? id be downing the one that lets u speak all languages like. immediately
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loyalty
#bashing my skull thru the floor#its so fun how both of these two would do ANYTHING for malleus and are loyal to their core but like. it manifests differently#like okay. the school vignette where its sebek doing Everything for malleus and silver is more hands-off. the one where he sees jamil w kali#m and is like 'okay yea my way is better' like. that mentally difference translated into the Everything of them is so INCHRESTING#sebek is much more the type to have blinders on and to immediately jump in to what malleus is saying. silver is more levelheaded abt shit#like hes more likely to hesitate if something is off yknow? im gaahhahh im trying to beam my thoughts into ur head. gesturing vaguely at the#the picture describes itself u dont need me to write my little novels here (i will anyways)#mwah mwah if u read this far welcome to my favorite person club <3 <3 an ELITE group u should feel honored#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#silver vanrouge#<3#sebek zigvolt#malleus draconia#i need the OB NOW#suntails#oh yea also more silver head chopping#dont think i forgot
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i like overthink everything now it makes me feel so dumb. i used 2 be able to just talk 2 ppl but nowadays every single thing im like Is that actually going to make them hate me. Yes probably. and then i just dont respond which makes ppl hate me. this is how it is
#ive been overthinking 1 light and casual mildly funny response to something but im worried itll come off as disrespectful and dismissive And#make me seem stupid and uncaring all at the same time. and also be seen as insulting. but like idt itd be insulting right like. im not#saying what it is so ig for all you guys know im like I mean if i say All your shit suck ball and i hateit kys. <- thats not the thing i was#going to say#like it doesnt matter now the window for response is closed now but i feel stupid bc i shouldve just said it it was light and casual. im so#bad at keeping convos gojng im convinced im not going to survive. In like a light and casual way like in a He will not make it through the#winter joke way. dw. im not going to do anything bc i had One failed interaction. if i was going to do anythjng itd be bc of the 8000000#other failed interactions. But im not. anyways. it just makes me feel so useless 😭 like i want to respond i want to talk to ppl so bad but#i feel like i mess things up Irreparably every time i speak OR i take too LONG overthinking my response and then i just cant respond bc its#been too long and then its been 3 years and the only messages ive ever sent r my intro message and 1 message 2 years ago that nobody#responded to at all. or the conversation stopped immediately after. and like i used to be better at this i was lkke. talkative in a couple#muts servers like. i talked 2 ppl daily in those servers and i had fun and like. I was an important part of the group and i felt like it#but i just feel like such an outsider for Everything and its literally my fault bc i cant just like. Talk. The explosion. bc im always like#im gonna try im gonna do it this time im gonna get it back im going to finally be Good connor and im going to fix it all and make a Good#solid friend group and ill find HEALTHY LOVE and i wont selfsabotage and ill move out and have a job and ill balance it well and ill start#all my hobbies and ill have a great routine and be so loveable and on top of it and not stressed and content and happy and roll with the#punches and then theres a single hiccup and im like Well fuckinf whatever im going to be an unemployed hermit forever and im going to die b4#im 25 anyways so Who cares and also im digging a little hole for myself. and its like. AUGHH ik i just have to persevere and overcome but#even saying that feels so stupid its not fucking hard its Talking to ppl. like. i literally if ive ever said a word to you i had to think#avt it and strategize how to respond right even for like. like. it makes it sound like its not genuine it is#like for example i want to say hey i love your art! but then i freak out and im like thats not normal thats like a rly generic comment they#hear that all the time theyll thjnk im being polite and my brains like hrmmm rewrite Your art changed my life. It shaped me. Ill never be#the same. Nad im like ok too far overcorrected go back and the sentence generator is like Your art has colors 💯 like. GOD. WHY IS IT SO#difficult. and then usually i either just dont say anythinf and feel awful abt it 4ever OR i send it on anon and then i spend like 15#minutes ibsessively slightly tweaking the apelling and capitalization and punctuation to make sure it doesnt seem like its me just in case#it Is the worst possible thing to say but then i see the response and itll be like AWWW TYSM :] THIS MEANS A LOT or whathaveyou and i feel#stupid bc i couldve just Told them this to their face and it wouldve been a good positive interaction we had. but instead i had 2 hide and#tyoe entirely differently so they couldnt sniff me from my typing style. and it soesnt even feel like the thanks is actually 4 me bc i#tweaked the message sm. and it still makes me happy that the oersons hapoy but its like. that couldve been a nice mutual interaction#like not that i need a personal ty i compliment ppl when i Want to compliment ppl and when its genuine yk. i dont do it so i get mutualpoint
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playing professor layton and the lost future rn im so close to the end its so good. i dont have the next game though and idk if i should buy a copy of it or buy an sd card reader so i can finally hack my 3ds and just get a pirated copy that way...
#also the puzzles feel way easier in this game than the first 2? idk if im getting better at them or if it is just an easier game#ive needed like 3 hint coins in total so far and im nearly done
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Something that's scaring me is that, most of the posts that I've seen of Swanatello are like STRAIGHT OUT THE OVEN. Like barely today- And I'm also scared to read it thanks to the surprise angsts that's been popping up on my feed
I am the world's most horrendous baker and im sorry for what im doing.
#swannie art is very low effort so far so it is? easy to make#because ive decided im allowed to do it low effort ig#also if it makes you feel any better#everyone will definitely live happily ever after#eventually#no one will die#they will get donnie back#it'll be okay#i always do happy endings <3#asks#lovely-kids-chaos
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my last week, a visual demonstration
#Robin processes emotions on main#hi yes I came back early. it's in order to process. I needed to like.... spill my guts on the dashboard tonight#IM STRUGGLING..#I have GOT to get a job#just one (1) more visit to a friend this summer and then I will be APPLYING for things again#also I'm having the very devil of a time trying to get myself to contribute to this household. I hate it#I hate that helping out makes me feel like I'm losing my agency—losing myself—like I'm dying every time. I want to be BETTER than this#but I also need to feel like an adult with agency but also I need to BEHAVE like an adult but even just saying that makes me feel nauseous#I need. something. to change. I hate this. I feel selfish and cowardly and I hate feeling selfish and cowardly#I need to . communicate. work something out with my mother so that I stop feeling perpetually behind and ashamed#if I could manage to feel good about chores and not just like I'm scrambling to keep up..... that would..... be... more... motivational#the problem is that I feel unsafe/unstable right now and my instinctive response is to close myself off to all demands#WHICH AS YOU CAN IMAGINE IS NOT CONDUCIVE TO BECOMING MORE STABLE.#demand avoidance makes me bad at contributing to the household AND terrified of applying to jobs and AUGH... AUGH.#I DO BETTER WHEN I LIVE ON MY OWN#living on my own‚ I don't have to deal with the whole soul-crushing horrorshow of negotiating my own emotions about doing chores#chores are GOOD and ENJOYABLE when they're for ME. they're only psychological torture when they're things I do as part of my ''rent''#ok. bedtime. I've sufficiently spilled my dang guts all over the place. it will get better eventually I think#I'm just having a horrible time Right Now#I'll figure this out though dangit#I KNOW the answer is to just Do the stuff and face fears and communicate and whatever I KNOW. but if anyone tells me that I'm going to bite#ok I'm done thank you and sorry to anyone reading this far <3 it really will be all right
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for like 3 weeks i was wondering why i was sleeping so much and felt listless. and just now I managed to email 3 people and responded to a month old message in the span of an hour because I got back to TAKING MY FUCKIN MEDS..........
#MOTHER FFFFUCKER#to be fair. my doc said I could stop taking them while im on break since i wouldnt need to be constantly pumped on stimulants#im not sure if it was a side effect but i managed to take like 3 different naps in one day and STILL managed to sleep thru the whole night#at least 2 days into my break. the weird thing is i didnt feel more or less rested afterwards. but mentally i think im in a good place rn#to really put the level of awakeness im at rn i feel weirdly confident i could start one piece. also bc of that sick new opening it BANGS#the song is really good and im in love with the animation style. did some digging and it seems one of the lead animators is masato mori#but i could be wrong. it seems he also did some work on mp100 which could explain a lot lol.. he uses smear frames really well to convey#consistent movement and fluidity!!! someone else might have done color design but it works really really well esp with odas style!!#just love the overall vibe and aesthetic and id really love to study it and incorporate a bit of it into my art.. especially the thick#outlines which i think helps to separate characters and objects on screen. though i have to say the style is definitely more suited to#animation bc of the simpleness and smears. maybe that will help me explore shapes and perspective when i draw... i wanna get better#at drawing poses and angles but i have a hard time wrapping my head around space and using perspective guide lines NGHHHH#i wonder if it has to do with my dogshit ability to judge distance. not depth perception but like. judge how far smth is in metres etc#im also wearing an N95 for the first couple weeks back bc of the wave. absolutely NO BODY is wearing a mask its so fucking over#where im sitting ive heard 5 different people coughing probably not into their elbows!!! and im just. head in my fucking hands#there was a kid sitting a couple seats away in class coughing as he pleases and i wanted to grab him in a chokehold so badly. PLEASEE#ive been annoying my family by asking them to mask up and reminding them to bring masks when they go out and showing them news articles#but at least its working bc we ordered some KN95s and my mom is at least taking me seriously so. please dont be afraid to speak up abt your#health. take care of yourself and others however u can!! wear that mask indoors at your maskless friends house!!! stay home when u can!!#im wearing a surgical mask at home too bc my parents have '''a dry throat cough''' and they are so bad at coughing into their sleeves#also im pretty sure dry throat isnt transmissible bc my brother started coughing too so.. i also tested negative but they havent tested yet#im also not a doctor but i have to keep reminding ppl whenever i can that covid and flu work differently. covid is new and too recent to#have nearly as much research done on it. it seems its also compounding so instead of building immunity it weakens the body and spreads to#to other systems which might explain brain fog and muscle weakness. i remember someone early in the pandemic got infected and it messed up#their smell/taste receptors so bad that they cant eat most foods and that stays in the front of my mind when i think abt covid. christ#yapping
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Love when Scrappy is running into danger and someone just. Grabs him and starts running. He's just SO Snatchable actually
#blah#scooby doo#scrappy doo#just skipped an episode for being yucky and dated so im feeling good <3 this next one is also dated but like in a different direction rip#its better quality though by FAR#anyways. scrappy. what a guy#whats that post like Holds him. Holds him. i feel that#You're just a rooby queue guy! A rooby dooby scooby dooby ooby cool guy
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Sometimes I just look at Isabeau and just know that if isat came out and I got into it when I was like 16 he would be my favorite character and I would've gone absolutely buck wild over this man and feel like he was laser targeting me. But alas Odile has a grip of steel on me rn due to her virtue of being a middle aged woman
#rat rambles#stars posting#I feel like the biggest change in my taste in characters as the years have gone by is Im now far more biased towards old ppl lol#although tbf I was also the one person in 2016 who actually liked asgore so maybe Ive always liked parhetic old ppl#but yeah the reason isa is past me bait is because hes an exploration and subversion of the sort of tropes I Hated as a kid#and I still dont like them so isa still appeals to me its just not as much as he would have to a younger me#I do genuinely love all the party very dearly tho theyre all soooo good#I think my favorite part of isabeau is how like. of everyone we get to see the least facets of him but like in a very good way#this is a man who hides and bottles shit hes so fun to rotate#his self image is so carefully controlled compared to everyone else which makes him an incredibly interesting character to analyze#and I love that despite him seeming like the most emotionally stable person here on the surface he still clearly has like. hashtag issues.#like he's in that beautiful zone where its so so fun imagining what it would look like to truly break him#<- normal things that normal ppl say. like me.#I may have my very light beef with alt looping aus as a concept but hes probably the most interesting alternate looper to me#also my light beef exclusively relates to king quest stuff which is why Im a big fan of duo looper aus with sif#but honestly. isa might be the only one that I genuinely think works better as a solo looper even with taking king quest into account#although bonnie comes close. I <3 looper bonnie I <3 seeing fictional children go through the horrors#I think theres a lot of fun to be had with any alt looper au tho I just am a huge king quest fan so I like it when my favorite elements of#it dont have to be handwaved#but yeah the real question is how would younger me feel about mirabelle#because on the one hand: acearo character#but on the other hand: I have always been a little hater abt romance so idk if younger me would rly be able to follow her character well#I wasnt exactly good at character analysis back then lol#except for the instances in which I was but I dont have that sort of faith in my younger self#yknow Im thinking abt my history of favorite characters now and I think me being one of few 2016 alphys enjoyers might have been a prophecy#she was my quote unquote third favorite but in reality she was second#I think she chara and peridot su teamed up to define my taste in fictional characters for the next several years#and somehow that lead to olivia becoming one of my favorite fictional characters of all time#I say somehow as if that isnt a very natural conclusion
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Minor thing that really irks me is when people treat the femc route in p3 portable as like the lesser story or like it’s a fanfic where nothing that happens in it is the “true” canon like. Bitch. The femc and everything that happens in her version of the story is just as canon as the male protagonist and everything that happens in his story. And there’s literally been so many fucking versions of p3 at this point like the base game, fes, portable, the movies, stage plays, reload, as well as spinoffs and manga and they all do things differently. I don’t see anyone acting like the base game is more canon than, say, reload so why do they do this with portable? Why can’t the (infinitely superior) version with the female protagonist just be respected for five fucking minutes goddamn
#persona#persona 3#kotone shiomi#its the misogyny yay#but god i am so tired of her game being treated as not actually canon like it literally is#theres multiple canons dipshit there is no true version of this game#and also people saying she doesnt fit the theme or some shit like. she literally does??? and honestly she does it better#like you can really feel the love she brings to the group and how she gives everything life and helps everyone#but also just how it all comes with pain she smiles and befriends everyone but shes always been so deeply alone and she doesnt want anyone#to feel the pain shes felt and so she carries all those burdens on her own and when everyone goes to reach out for her#its too late far too late shed sacrifice herself over and over for these people and theyll never once see her cry#she also you know. actually has good social links and gets to know everyone not just people she wants fuck#so you get to see just infinitely better versions of every character with her she really does bring out the best in them#and another thing in particular with the disrespect of her story is the way shinji living is treated again just like#some kinda fanfic au by someone who didnt wanna cope with their blorbo dying like ughh#shinji surviving is just as canon as him dying there is an entire canon where he gets a happy ending and it is once again#much better than versions where he dies like ive. exhausted myself with explaining it but its just better#so yeah basically out of spite i like acting like kotones story is actually the one true canon#and when people mention stuff that isnt in her story im like ‘huh? what? that didnt happen’#cuz whos gonna stop me
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save do you have any tips for managing migraines
uhhhhhh lessee
personally i have prescriptions for it cause mine screwed my brain up but obvious ones like proper rest + maybe log what you eat and see if theres any correlation + general put nutrients in your body stuff which is actually kind of hard to keep track of
i have some REALLY WEIRD scent based triggers so i have to stay away from ammonia-like scents and eucalyptus cause those will put my ass out flat IMMEDIATELY, thats not an everyone thing but maybe note if theres sensory stuff around you that might be a trigger
for me warm toned lights and screen tints are way better than cool tones/white light and if youve got light colored eyes wear amber tinted sunglasses outdoors
water + salty snack > pedialite > gatorade and depending on caffeine sensitivity maybe moderate that cause it can either help or hurt, kinda depends on the person, but water and saltines will get you electrolytes and its cheap as fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck even if it doesnt taste as great as gatorade
sunlight on your skin and not in your eyeballs
also vitamin d just in general helps but its way better to actually use the sun for that than trying to digest it so like just 10ish minutes in the sun is what my neurologist recommended on top of taking 2000mg tablets
thats what ive got off the top of my head
#im not a neurologist but i dont get them as bad anymore at least#also if learning what you feel like beforehand so you can nip it before it starts helps a LOT#if you can take a painkiller before it starts itll do way more for you#but also dont undertreat it like dont stick it out thats what fucked me up hardcore just take the painkiller#i have to take at least 800mg of ibuprofen if i even sniff a migraine coming on but check with a doc before you do that#i also gotta pair it with sumatriptan and i can only do that 3 times a month Or Else#if ibuprofen doesnt knock it outta me its an er trip and they stuff an iv in me and pump my ass so full of drugs#oh also too much water can also cause migraines#best to stick with the 8 8oz a day thing and not go too far over#but yeah being proactive and preventative is better than coasting and treating them when they come#sometimes ill sip a little pickle juice causenits got magnesium and potassium on top of the sodium for electrolytes#i know food logs arent GREAT but they can help with stuff like this even just kinda checking in on if youre getting everything you need#i go sorta peasant with it like as long as ive had a couple greens in a week i should be good to go#snap peas or artichoke hearts or other really solid veggables#or#god bless#The Cucumber#cucumbers are the powerhouse of the vegatable
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reading tevinter nights veeeeery slowly. it's definitely miles better than the stolen throne.
#im 3/4 of the way thru the first story. thoughts so far:#i think its funny they made myrion gay. tevinter mage found being gay fork found in kitchen.#i know it's because they overdosed them but making qamek be tranquility 2 feels very cheap. not everything has to be something else.#strife is fun i hope he shows up in the game#having myrion say knife ear every 5 seconds is irritating. feels silly and i dont think readers are so#stupid theyll forget he's racist once they move on to a new paragraph. also sort of carries on with dai's issue of not really#understanding or wanting to engage with oppression outside of 'hey! dont call them bitches bro' type stuff#i do like weekes' writing tho. i thought aside from solas they were one of the weaker writers in dai but this is pretty good#way better than gaider who IS good at dialogue and bad at everything else
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actually while im at it. flowey undertale. im getting his stupid fanclub pin because unfortunately i am a fan
#hes literally just an 8 year old trying to be. not cool but Smart and Dark#like on one hand he knows more about the game due to resetting and hes also soulless which on one hand sort of mirrors players and rheir bo#redom but also it could range from depression to apathy though thats my hc#so he thinks hes smarter than everyone else#and also that 8 year old has. so much baggage#his alarm clock dialogue.#mistaking the player for chara#you know the drill#plus his personality#while im glad undertale had the ending it did#i feel like asriel ppprobably couldve been handled better </3#but thats in the past!!! yeag#ALSO alsoalso flowey parallels to ralsei i think its super neat#i do wonder if more parallels will show up. like flowey getting bored of a game he plays a million times vs ralsei which he doesnt seem to#be bored? he does know the game far better than kris susie or even the player do#so i wonder if thatll come up? floweys boredom vs ralseis unboredom. keeping them in a world thatll forever loop if the player doesnt let g#o#seeing the same thinf a bunch of times and getting sick of it vs hearing the same thing over and over and loving it#please not theres not any basis for this ralsei doesnt seem to really… fit into that#its more of escapism and him taking it to the farthest he can (avoiding negative thoughts even when they need to be confronted. ignoring th#e elephant in the room) which is how he mightve had to cope? or maybe its just because of the whole game aspects#also ralsei doesnt see other darkners as as important as the lightners/kris/mmmaybe us?????????? we dont know if he knows#like how flowey puts most other monsters beneath him except for chara/by proxy frisk and us#ralsei doesnt see himself as above the darkners but he sees susie and kris above them. i think its the same for flowey#though. flowey is debatable i think he might put himself above others considering genocide#yeah!!!!!!! i love gaymes
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can i uhhh gwt a loan of $5000 please
#let me minimalisw my payments from the $150 it is to $50 a wk or wtv.#hell ill even settle for $75 tbh .#bc i have no issue paying shit off. i can do it. but .#also off topic but i did . some dish washing today#it was 3 pieces of cutlery a cup and 2 bowls but . progress.#i woke up at like 11am feeling the deoths of despair and decided to nap all day. ive been Awake#awake for maybe an hour ? or two???#and im trying tocget the strength to fucming shower. bc ik itll make me feel better#but im so sick of feeling depressed man. i docall#i forget that . this isnt smth i can rlly Fix. its smth i just have to learn to manage and cope with but if i dont wanna#throw a tantrum everytume i wake up wity a storm cloud over my brain and thr grey feeling tintign my senses....#fr abt to just quit my job#takw mt final paycheck and book it as far as $300 in fuel will take me#only issue is my tires fucked. i cannot suppirt ymself properly without 2 companies on my ass for debt#and as impulsive as i wanna be abt this if i dont think this through i will end up jobless and homeless#which i refuse 💜
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to me kyle was a junior year art school drop out bc i think this puts him at the sweet spot of a) dropping out at a young enough age that i think it gives him the time to establish his career to what i think it'd be around the age i headcanon him to be when getting the ring (26ish) and b) gives him basing off my own experience (so i cannot speak remotely at all to the universality of anything. purely my own personal art school experience alone) if he was taking 5 classes a semester he'd have about 20 classes under his belt minimum and if he dropped out after the first semester he'd have about 25 classes which gives him quite a broad range of classes he could engage with just like on studio classes alone not counting any art history/lib art etc type courses he'd be taking to set him up with the wide range of skills and mediums and styles he's shown to dabble in. always thinking about art student kyle forever. because of my biases. as an art student
#also part of my projection bc guys i cant tell you how bad during last semester my second semester of junior year i wanted to quit so bad.#my summer experience was pretty much were i not entering senior year and i didnt have this stupid expensive tuition bc out of state private#college like i would have dropped out already. i dont know if i ever actually mean that but constantly from sophomore year i have been#haunted by the desire to drop out and wondering what my life could have been had i gone w/ my original plans</3#but i feel better this semester so far even if it's already getting tough... so there is hope! also i like to joke im getting my six figure#kyle is going that he got his degree in friendship and girlfriend. and getting high every other weekend. < my personal belief.#static.soundz
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