#also i just feel like sharing my loophole in case it can help anyone else

[x0ura]

Dunno who needs to hear this, but:

If doing one thing helps you do another thing, don't feel bad about doing the first thing.

I have extreme difficulty eating vegetables, but have found a loophole by cooking them in soup and eating them that way.

If anyone else has found similar loopholes to do The Thing, feel free to share them!

[beevean]

I haven't played TGAA, but I find the double standard in the way Barok is treated vs the way Miles, Fran and the rest of them are treated kind of strange. Barok is supposedly insufferable, plus he's racist and xenophobic. I ain't excusing that, but that's just how 19th century England was.

Miles and Fran have most likely sent innocent people to jail or even landed them the death penalty, simply because they cared more about securing a guilty verdict than actual justice. Godot is a literal murderer, and I've heard some unpleasant things about Simon and Nahyuta as well.

Yet, all (or most of) these characters are redeemed. Barok's biggest crime is...upholding the views of everyone else at the time. And that somehow makes him irredeemable, despite him actually warming up to Ryonosuke later. I'm not saying everyone should like Barok, but if Barok is irredeemable, so is every other prosecutor in AA.

This has been pretty much my point ever since they announced GAA's localization.

Barok is obnoxious, that is undeniable. Nipponese this, Eastern island that, his mocking of Ryuu easily crosses a line that leaves the player uncomfortable, as it should, because if his xenophobia doesn't bother you it says more about you than about the game.

But. Being obnoxious is all he does.

He does not present forged evidence, or use loopholes in court, or coach witnesses, like Edgeworth and Franziska used to do.

He's never ever physically violent against the defense, unlike Franziska, Godot, Simon or Nahyuta - he breaks his own glasses and bottles when frustrated, but he never harms anyone. (it says something that the entire series so far had only three prosecutors who are decent human beings)

His objective as a prosecutor is simply to find the truth. While he pushes very hard to prove the guilt of the defendant, it's clear that it's because he genuinely believes in his case - once Ryuu manages to convince him his theory makes sense, Barok drops most of his hostility and helps him. Unlike Edgeworth pre-heel face turn and Franziska, he couldn't care less about his own record, which means that he never deliberately gambled with the lives of potentially innocent people for his own ego. He is biased towards Ryuu, not only because he's Japanese but also because Barok admits to personally taking his cases even if they're banal, but he's not completely driven by a petty grudge like Godot - like I said, he'll help Ryuu win if he does a good enough job in his book, no matter his personal feelings towards his learned Japanese friend.

Both he and Edgeworth post-heel face turn share the same goal of finding the truth. However, Edgeworth has hurt at least one person in his quest, infamously Adrian Andrews when he threatened to reveal her mental illness in court and even said "if you kill yourself, that is no concern of mine". Compare this with Barok, who has shown himself capable of kindness as soon as his second appearance, when he (spoilers for Case 4 of GAA) subtly implied he would allow Roly Beate to keep his job despite tampering with the crime scene, because he could empathize with the poor man wanting to spend one day with his wife.

He's genuinely competent in his job, relying simply on cold hard logic to dismantle the defense's arguments as a good prosecutor should - to be honest, it may be the different writers, but Klavier, Simon and Nahyuta never struck me as being especially good at their job, with Klavier having to deal with a rather incompetent Apollo in AJ and Simon and Nayhuta happily abusing the old "attacking the defense" and "asking evidence for every word you say" tricks. (to be fair Simon gets to demonstrate his interesting manipulative skills in one case... Turnabout Storyteller, when he's Athena's ally. Also, I can't remember anything particularly horrible he does beyond being an ass like usual, in fact he may be the best prosecutor of the second trilogy)

Speaking of Nahyuta, the reasons I can't stand him while I love Barok are that Nahyuta is nothing but repetitive, unwitty, painfully realistic obnoxiousness propped up by a shallow twist revealed at the tail-end of the game; he has no real character development, because "sowwy guys i was good all along" is not development; he prosecutes simply to win even if it means insisting that a young girl committed murder in spite of the defense's reasonable arguments; there is no in-game justification for shit like him tormenting Athena in Japanifornia, or even him being an asshole in Japanifornia at all; and there's no weight in the realization that he let hundreds of innocent people being sentenced to death while he stood aside to protect his sister (like, that has got to mess you up a bit right? Can you show me that, game?). Barok not only has a much more fleshed out, drawn out backstory that explains most of his behavior (although I have my reservations at tying his racism to One Trauma); not only he slowly (... very slowly) warms up to Ryuu; not only he has humanizing traits like feeling horrible about being branded the Reaper of the Old Bailey, like it would happen to anyone being rumored to be a death bringer; but he is, most important of all, an overdramatic bitch and the contrast between his intimidating demeanor and the shit he pulls behind the bench is infinitely more hilarious than being told for the umpteenth time that you're a putrid lawyer who's going to hell. It doesn't sound like much, but a good AA game masters the art of "love to hate".

You know how Klavier is a base-breaking prosecutor because some consider him too nice? Barok is what happens when you take Klavier's honest, well-meaning demeanor and give him enough presence to be hated and loved at the same time. I completely understand if people find him too annoying (he's testing my own patience lmao), but I still think he is one of the best prosecutors in the series, both as a job and as the role of the rival.

[intothewickedwood]

Once Upon A Time Rewatch: 6x14 Page 23

Okay what episode do we have today?

Ah okay, a Regina centric. That’s cool.

Is that the same guard Snow stripped naked in 1x16? Whaaaat?! Just looked it up and it totally is! Awesome call back! I’m going to name him Jim.

Oh my God, she killed Jim!!

Wait, so this has to be after Heart of Darkness.

The terrified look on that woman’s face when Regina strokes her chin, looks at her longingly and tells her she loves her. Omg Regina was in love with this woman all along! It was never about Daniel. It was about Christina! I’m naming her Christina. 

They are my otp now.

How did Tinker Bell get out of neverland? Pan decides when people leave, and I doubt he’d let her leave just to pay a visit with the Evil Queen. But then and again maybe it was all part of his big plan.

Oh. Pixie dust doesn’t dictate who your true love is. It just shows you possibilities. That’s not what you said before, Tinker Bell!

Regina, we all know you spared her because she’s your ex-girlfriend.

Actually, this visit from Tinker Bell is odd because she doesn’t seem angry at all like when she, like, wanted to kill Regina in 3x03. How did she go from, “okay. I lost my wings because of you but it’s all cool. I just want my otp together.” to “I’m gonna f***ing drug you with pixie dust and rip your heart out!”?

Also, this is the Evil Queen I like to see. So cold, terrifying and breaking on the inside. I’m not a fan of the humorous one in 6x02. I wish Split Queen was more like this as well. Ah different writers and director. Interesting.

Split Queen: “…not some burlap-loving peasant who sleeps on dirt.” Wish Robin: “Excuse me, I sleep on hay.” Important distinction!

Snow’s so excited about the wedding, bless her.

Lol Zelena just drags Emma’s hand to look at her ring. My girl loves shiny things! And how could I forget, her otp is getting married! She is in heaven right now!

I love Emma just casually talking to Zelena like they’re gal pals at a sleepover. More of this please! 

I can see what sqers say about this scene. Regina really does look hurt by the notion of Emma getting married. There is no heterosexual reason for her to react like this unless she’s in love with Hook. I think this is the only time they hug. Man, I feel so bad for sqers because upon this rewatch I can really see where they are coming from with that interpretation. It’s definitely there. And then they hug because Emma’s getting married to someone else. I would be so upset if that was my otp. What am I talking about, I watched 10 seasons of Smallville as a hardcore Chloe x Clark shipper. I think this exact scenario played out and it freaking hurts! 

In other news, I am so in love with Snow. Have I mentioned that? I feel like I haven’t mentioned it in a while and it needs to be said. 

I’m also in love with David, in case you forgot. I want to join their marriage. Can I join their marriage? I’m joining their marriage. Emma, I’m your mummy now. Don’t think about the age difference too much. 

I’ve eaten a lot of chocolate already today. Can you tell? I feel so alive! I want to share my social security number and be freeee!! I am trying to block out my anxiety about having to move house again next friday. Yep, that’s right, 4th place in two years. I think I will write all of these high on chocolate.

What would happen if you cut your hair with those sheers? Or your garden bush? No, that is not a euphemism, you dirty bastards (affectionate). 

I haven’t had a haircut in 10 years. Holy cow! That’s why my afro is so big, it’s full of secrets. 

Nemo is your dad now, Hook. Even though I’m pretty sure he’s a lot younger than you. 

He called him “My boy.” hehe.

I remember when I thought Hook and Rumple had the same mother. That would have been quite the twist.

I thought that vase of flowers was a giant cauliflower. Did you know broccoli, cauliflower, cabbages, brussels sprouts and turnips are all related? I wonder what thanksgivings are like when they all get together. Probably not fun for them. 

See what I did there xD? 

Emma: “This is my fault. I’m the one who convinced you to bring him here. It’s on me.” Regina: “Emma, you don’t have anything to make up for. You were just trying to help.” Omg, this compared to when she told Emma she’d ruined her life because Emma saved Marian. The development. I really appreciate this change because I nearly lost it with Regina when that was her attitude. 

Screw it, I’m making bean enchiladas. Brb. I’ll save you some!

I’m back! They’re in the oven. Anyone wants the recipe hmu! They’re veggie! 

You just know Split Queen and Wish Robin have a sexy dungeon in their castle. They just do.

Enchanted ropes would have been useful in so many situations.

The enchiladas are ready! Repeat after me, Becky: “I will remember oven gloves this time, I will remember oven gloves this time.”

Robin is so into Split Queen. He wants her to live with him and everything, even though they just met. 

I don’t think that arrow would have taken her to Robin since it takes her to the thing she loves most. She can’t love someone she’s never met. We all know it would shoot Christina right in the ass. That’s true love biatches! Evil Peasant 5ever!

Oh snap! Emma found Hook looking at himself killing her grandfather??! I completely forgot about this!

Why does she say, “That’s David’s father”? Why doesn’t she say, “That’s my grandfather,” or “That’s my dad’s dad”? She hasn’t called her dad ‘David’ in years. It’s like she’s trying to separate herself from the victim as much as possible.

She’s not even a little bit upset he killed her dad’s dad? That that event caused her father so much pain? She’s just infuriated that he tried to burn his memory. I mean, yes, she should be angry about that but where’s the empathy for her dad at least? I didn’t know any of my grandfathers well but if I found out I was engaged to someone who did that I would be angry for my grandparent, angry for my parent and angry for myself. I’m just speechless that that’s all she cares about. It seems so out of character. But then and again Regina had her other grandad killed. 

And now he’s gonna leave because he rightfully got told off. Can’t say I’d offer the same thing but she said, “until you’re ready” not “you’ll never be ready”, dude. 

I think he’s just scared David will punch him in the face at this point. It’s the only explanation for doing the exact opposite thing Emma asked of him.

“Captain Hook is always welcome on the Nautilus.” More like welcome on the naughty list after that stunt.

She doesn’t want a man, Henry Sr. She just confessed her deep, passionate, sexual love for Christina like 20 minutes ago, remember? Sometimes I wonder why I bother. It’s not even subtext, dude. Get it together, man.

Why don’t they fight themselves with magic?

Her dad is so heartbroken the person Regina hates most is herself. 

That is really sad that the person she hates most his herself. I can relate.

Yes! Launch those apples at yourself! 

My conversations with myself be like-

Oh boy. This is too reminiscent of conversations with myself. Yes, I sword fight myself wearing a fancy black, cleavage-revealing dress in my head all the time. Only joking, I wear trilby hats. 

Oh okay. Now they’re tying each other up. I see what this is really about. I still haven’t bleached the “we do like it rough, don’t we Regina?” line from my mind. 

I suppose she did take back some of her own darkness. But I was hoping she would just merge herself back together. That would have been a really predictable outcome, but I just would have preferred it. 

This scene is so weird lol, but it helped me tremendously. I used to hate myself so, so much. You don’t even understand. It was like a violent hatred for myself for not fitting in and for every single little mistake I’d ever made. Then with a lot of self- healing and the help of this episode I began my journey into loving myself. I wrote on a sticky note “Love yourself. If the Evil Queen can do it, so can you.” and stuck it to my wall. Nothing I’ve done is comparable to what the Evil Queen has done and if she can learn to love herself, why can’t everyone else. Anyone who’s struggling with self-hatred, please take this episode to heart. You are worthy of love, most importantly from yourself. Any time you find yourself hating yourself just try to remember this scene and that the flipping Evil Queen of all people recognised the importance of self-love and didn’t give a damn what anyone else thought. She damn well gave herself a chance. I’ve heard a good technique is looking in the mirror and telling yourself what you love about you. Even if you’re not feeling it at first, you could get into the habit of it and your brain will start to accept those words as true. Because they are true.

Aww she sees the Charmings as her family. 

Regina: “it did give me hope when I needed it most, and that is just as important.” Oh my God, preach the word Regina! Regina is preaching with fire today! 

It’s like she’s having a therapy session with herself. I need to do that. I really do. Then I need to get actual therapy lol xD. But baby steps! 

Okay. A loophole as to how he can change Split Queen’s story. You know what, at this point I’ve learnt just to go with it.

Can Snow and Zelena be best friends? Please. It’s literally all I want in life. And to join Snowing’s marriage. I’m not asking for much. I’ll talk about it in self-therapy.

Henry’s got Gideon’s haircut now. He wants to be cool like his uncle.

I want to look at myself with the love and adoration Regina looks at herself with. We should all get to that point where we look like we’re about to intensely make out with ourselves when we look in the mirror. 

I know what they were doing with page 23. I just wish Split Queen had changed her outfit so it could have been exactly like the page illustration. But I don’t think it was meant to predict the future. It was just one of Isaac’s fanfictions, wasn’t it? Hmm. I think it was a mystery to him as well if I can remember correctly.

It’s nice that oq shippers got their ship in the end in one form.

Snow is just constantly high up to her eyeballs on hope, bless her. 

Emma needs a dog. She seems like such a dog person.

Also, that enchilada was yumilicious, if I do say so myself.

[thejustmaiden]

Heyo, fellow Inuyasha fans! Happy Friday! This particular blog will serve as a collection of random thoughts I’ve been mulling over lately. Hope you’ll consider giving it a read. By the way, it’ll specifically pertain to the Sessrin ship. If that’s not something that is of interest to you, then no need to read any further. Whatever happens, I wanted to get this out before the sequel. Alrighty, let’s go! 

I’m not sure many of us realize just how much fiction sparks public dialogue and shapes culture. There have been countless studies and research done to prove it, therefore this really isn’t up for debate. What the real question here should be is have we taken the time to fully contemplate and assess just how much fictional experiences are able to change or influence our perspective on real, everyday life? The visual arts are just one of many evolutionary adaptations that serve to give us more insight into one another’s mind. If our outlook on fiction contrasts with said insight, then perhaps some re-evaluating is in order.  

Powerful works of literature such as 1984 and the beloved Harry Potter series are just two examples. George Orwell’s book contributed strongly to how readers viewed government and politics during that time, and to this day it’s a book that resonates with many. As much as Harry Potter is cherished all across the world, there are religious and academic institutions that condemn it or have even gone so far as to ban it. I may not agree with the extreme measures taken, but it’s fascinating nonetheless to witness the extent to which fiction can move and mobilize people for a cause.

The takeaway is that indicating fiction doesn’t have the power to create change in our everyday lives is misleading to say the least. So how exactly then can fictional stories that are, after all, completely made up affect society in such profound ways? It all lies in the power of the psychology of fiction. According to cognitive psychologist and novelist, Keith Oatley, who’s been researching the psychological effects of fiction for over a decade, he states that engaging with stories about other people can improve empathy and theory of mind. When we identify with these characters’ struggles, we begin to share their frustration for societal problems that plague them. These types of stories tap into our emotions more so than- believe it or not- nonfiction, and thus their effects inspire us and even have the ability to alter our worldviews. 

I’ll be returning to that specific topic a bit later, but moving on for now!

It’s safe to say that I speak on behalf of the majority of antis. That being said, I first want to add that we are aware that sessrin shippers claim to agree that there was nothing inherently romantic that took place between Rin and Sesshomaru during their travels together. The thing is we have trouble believing you guys when you time and time again provide contradictory statements to defend your stance.

Voicing things like, “all signs point to Rin” and “it’s been foreshadowed” sends the exact opposite message of what you supposedly stand for and, if anything, confirms that you’ve had romance on your mind long before it would’ve been acceptable to come out with openly. You can’t just go along with what we say when it’s convenient to your argument and then back it up later with “who else but Rin.” How can the relationship you’re imagining be so obvious if they didn’t hint at it for the whole duration of the original series like we agreed upon? Elaborate on how we could’ve possibly come to such wildly different conclusions when we started AND left off with the same views for and throughout the series. 

On top of that, making the excuse that we don’t speak for adult!Rin and that she has the right to make her own decisions once she’s old enough is a weak defense. Firstly, because we haven’t even met her. Secondly, because it’s unfair of you to assert that you know what’s best for Rin and then say we’re not allowed to just because it doesn’t align with your beliefs. I get that you feel protective over her character, but do recall that this adult version of her none of us have actually met yet. We have no idea what kind of woman she’s become, what her dreams or aspirations may be, and whether she’s married or even wants to be. I’m not against the idea of her falling in love, I just don’t think it’ll be with Sesshomaru. I guess I’m also a fan of the idea of her following in Kaede’s footsteps, because if anyone can grow up to be an independent, trusted, and wise leader of the community like her it’s Rin.

To make matters worse, way too many of you continue to celebrate the drama cd and profess that it was sweet that Sesshomaru basically promised he’d wait for Rin all while somehow ignoring the glaring grooming implications. Why do you only see what you want to see and fail to acknowledge that actual child grooming scenarios do in fact play out like this in real life? A high percentage of people who have been victims of grooming can attest to this. If Sessrin does go canon, all the sequel succeeded in doing to avoid the direct correlation with grooming was skip over the more questionable and dodgy portions of it. Take out the time jump, however, and you no longer have a loophole to cover up the scary unmistakable truth, which is that Sessrin and grooming are essentially one in the same.

No one case is identical to another so please don’t come to me with your “but how is it grooming if Sesshomaru didn’t manipulate Rin” refutes. Nobody knows what the hell went on during those years between The Final Act and this upcoming sequel. Based on everything exhibited so far- that is if we decide to recognize the drama cd like so many of you choose to do- Sessrin’s dynamic is eerily reminiscent of real life child grooming. Why else do you think a lot of us fans have a huge problem with it? It’s triggering for a reason. 

Let’s be honest, Sesshomaru’s supposed love confession could’ve just been the first of many gestures like it. Who really knows, right? According to you shippers, a major shift in their relationship took place sometime during this critical period none of us got to watch unfold. I’m sure you all have explored the various ways this would’ve gone down in fan fiction and through other creative means of expression. Not to spoil the fun, but all I can’t help but wonder about is just how many of those supposed “cute moments” would’ve been as creepy and cringey as that proposal. Hundreds of thousands (possibly millions?!) of fans would undoubtedly agree with me, too. It seems to me this ain’t due to a mere difference of opinion. Taste is one thing, ethics a whole other. 

By the way, in case you didn’t know, groomers don’t necessarily need to plan out every single move in order for their behavior to constitute as grooming. What we should be paying attention to instead is the fact that Sesshomaru made a conscious decision to act on his own selfish desire for a young girl who couldn’t have possibly known in that moment the magnitude of what he was asking of her. Why is it that a vulnerable Rin is put in a position that forces her to be the one responsible for making such a big, life-changing decision for the both of them? Yes, Sesshomaru gave her the choice and, yes, she doesn’t have to make it till later, but why on Earth is he coming to her with this well before a child her age is ready and mature enough to handle it? Even if his intentions are good (broadly speaking of course), his what you shippers probably call “innocent acts” are incidentally coercing Rin into reciprocating his feelings. Whether he planned for that or not, he’s at fault. Period. 

That’s one way the power imbalance works. A child wants nothing more than to please the adult they look up to and adore, because they’re impressionable like that. Maybe Rin processes this like she’ll want whatever he wants, so that’s what she trains herself to believe- either right then and there or over time. Plus, if you really think about it, why wouldn’t she trust him if in her eyes he’s been nothing but good to her and that’s all she’s ever really known? (Psst! Charm is integral to the manipulative nature of grooming so it’s deceiving AKA manipulation can come off as praise or flattery.) Bottom line is that Rin is too young to have to think about this kind of deep stuff at all, and Sesshomaru shouldn’t have taken advantage of the power he had/has over her to influence a decision she was by no means prepared to hear about much less decide on. Your headcanons seem to imply that she’ll eventually have to choose though, and Idk about you but I rather not push my own fantasy agenda onto a underage girl regardless of how much I want it. Idc if she’s fictional, it wouldn’t feel right so why would I want to see that? My principals couldn’t ever allow for it.   

Even if it wasn’t an official proposal, per se, it’s still disturbing to me that so many of you find joy in the thought of a grown adult male essentially waiting for a young girl HE KNEW to become old enough before pursuing her. I know this drama cd ain’t technically canon, y'all, but since this is literally the only source we have that may foreshadow a potential Sessrin to come, and it’s referenced a lot, I figured it still should be called out for exactly what it is- Grooming: 101!!!!

Just as I demonstrated above, fiction has the ability to make even the most inappropriate and uncomfortable situations be viewed in a favorable light when you put the right spin on it. *cough* Lolicon culture, need I say more? *cough* Despite what you may believe, the strategies fiction utilizes to explain themes/concepts can genuinely lead to how we perceive them, and ultimately to how we come to make sense of a similar event presented to us in real life. Especially if we have no prior experience with any of it and have nothing to compare something to, these perceptions can be dangerous yet still persuasive to certain fans- young ones in particular. The more narrative consistency across stories and different mediums, the more likely they’ll influence social beliefs. Minors don’t possess the same capacity as adults to think critically about the content they consume, and if we aren’t more careful about what we put out there then all of us will continue to face serious repercussions.

This is precisely why it’s crucial we persist in our fight against the rabid phenomenon of glorifying young girls in every sexual context imaginable. Just look at what something as seemingly harmless as fiction has the power to do. The scope of fiction is broad and far-reaching, and it’s about time we stop denying that fact and actually do something about it if we have the means to.

The truth of the matter is that we’re in desperate need of proper education and training programs on this issue in our communities. Families need to ensure their children have access to the necessary resources, but it isn’t just on them. ALL of us gotta do our part and ALL of us should be up for the task. It takes a village, right? If we do not properly discuss and address child sexual abuse (CSA) with our children and in public forums, including the internet, then we’re ultimately accepting incidents of CSA should they arise. Consequently, that also translates to indirectly accepting that the predators among us stay untreated and/or unpunished. That’s how the generational and societal aspect of the abuse can continue, and we must do everything in our power to secure our children’s future. Yes, even when it comes to fiction.

If you still somehow don’t think the Sessrin pairing has anything to do with grooming, allow me to break this down for you one more time:

1. If some of your fellow sessrin shippers say that a relationship like this in real life is harmful, then that should be pretty telling in and of itself.

2. Piggybacking off #1: if your only defense to that is “well it’s just fiction,” then you should ask yourself why you can’t ever come up with better reasons. Same goes for history and culture, so please stop using those to justify this relationship. None of the above can or should be applied since it’s already been established that fiction pervades our lives and vice versa.

3. If fellow shippers who are victims of grooming say they are drawn to Sessrin because it allows them in a way to “take back control” from their abuser so that they can better cope with past traumas, then they’re inadvertently admitting that Sessrin does possess qualities associated with the past child sexual abuse they underwent. AKA Sessrin is relatable for its abusive dynamic.

I have to ask by the way, but why do you get so offended when we don’t support your ship anyway? Is it because we interpret it to be controversial and you don’t like your ship getting a bad rap? Is it because it would be insulting to admit that antis actually have a point in it being problematic and you rather double down instead? Or is it because you’re projecting yourself onto Rin and prefer to not go into detail about why that is? Maybe it’s too personal, or maybe it’s because deep down you’re ashamed. Of course that doesn’t mean you’re bad people, but suppressing these kind of negative emotions can’t be healthy for anyone. A little awareness and self-reflection on your part can benefit not just you but all of us in the long run. Cognitive dissonance can suck, but it’s also part of being human. 

I recently came across a comment I’d like to share with you. Unfortunately, this is not the first time nor will it be the last I see the likes of it. Anyway, in it a fan stated how embarrassing it must be being an Anti in this fandom when an episode like “Forever with Lord Sesshomaru” exists. Guys, this shipper and all those who liked their post are showing their true colors. Perpetuating and/or anticipating these sexualized images of young girls is a grave issue in both our society and media alike. I think we can all agree on that, or at least I hope so. It’s remarks like these that prove we still got a long way to go in terms of progress, and if we ever hope to effectively reverse some of our backwards way of thinking. So serious question for ya in regard to this: Why is it too much to ask that grooming be portrayed for what it is? Grooming. To clarify, grooming is bad and needs to be painted in a bad light. It’s as simple as that. If only we could all acknowledge it for what it is, we wouldn’t be in this predicament. 

Historical accuracy and cultural differences aside, it appears the crux of the matter between Sessrin shippers and Antis is our acceptance and/or denial of fiction’s influence on real life. If we can’t agree on this, then we’ll never agree on anything else. As mentioned earlier, there is more than enough evidence to support the idea that fiction impacts our lives in extraordinary ways. I, for one, believe in the transformative power of stories. I think they do more for us than many of us give them credit for and/or are inclined to admit. 

This is partially why I believe that the majority of sessrin folk are missing the point most of the time. All they do is focus on insignificant and irrelevant information that accomplishes nothing but more gaslighting and strawmanning. Whether it be an intentional or unconscious decision, whatever we argue goes right over their head. All they do is throw around deflections and antagonizing remarks that serve no real purpose other than to make Antis out to be the unreasonable and irrational ones. Making connections between our own lives and our stories is a completely natural and normal occurrence. If those particular shippers insist on denying just how interconnected real life and fiction both are, what that tells me is they’re either out of touch with reality or deliberately choose to be.

Just to be clear, I am of the opinion that most if not all antis aren’t real life predators. If they say they aren’t, I honestly take their word for it. Speaking to Sessrin shipper directly: We know it’s not Sesshomaru you want to be but Rin. No, we’re not calling you pedophiles or groomers. None of us think you are using a fictional ship to attract underage fans to be the Rin in your life or anything of the sort. We are well aware that many of you are self-inserting yourself as Rin, so please don’t feel the need to tell us yourself because that would be stating the obvious.

I learned from a few of you since this sequel was announced that the Sessrin relationship isn’t just a ship but an opportunity for you to confront the person who used and abused you. So there’s two issues with this I’d like to raise. (Sorry if I’m repeating myself, but it’s urgent I stress this again!) This is what I have to say:

If fiction does not affect real life or have the ability to normalize anything as you claim to believe, then why does “fixing” what happened to you via your preferred choice of coping associated with these two characters in the first place? Why bring your past abuse into this at all if at the end of the day it’s “just fiction” and nothing more to you but a source of entertainment?

By confessing that you use Sessrin to cope with your past trauma, you therein reveal that Sessrin does in fact resemble an adult-child relationship with a grooming dynamic. So why then would you want other fans to be exposed to a pairing that brings to mind the very abuse you endured? We’re supposed to stop this toxic cycle- NOT find more ways to manifest and relive it, much less subject other fans to it. 

You may think that Sessrin doesn’t fit the textbook definition of what child grooming is, but that’s not to say it doesn’t embody it or that it doesn’t at the very least have traces of it that stand out. 

“Antis are miserable people who don’t know how to enjoy a good story. It’s just fiction, stop ruining it for other fans!”

Well, no, it’s not just fiction or just a story. Some of you evidently went and proved that yourself, and without my help, by revealing how you relate Sessrin to your own life and apply it to cope with past abuse. Past abuse or not, as far as I can tell we’re all equally invested in these characters. That speaks volumes and just goes to show that fiction touches our lives in long-lasting ways.

I have something I want to say concerning some of who believe that it’s inconsiderate of antis who have been victims of grooming or another form of child abuse to tell other victims who ship Sessrin how they should cope with their trauma. Now as much as I respect the various means victims discover to deal with their painful pasts, there’s always an appropriate time and a place for these things to occur. We must seek out better ways to safely cope with the abuse we lived through (if any) without running the risk of hurting and endangering others. 

There are plenty of fans in other fandoms who don’t try to defend their ships going canon, because they’re able to recognize an unhealthy or toxic pairing when they see one and won’t try to justify it. A Sessrin romance simply does not belong on a show geared towards teens, and I really don’t need to go into detail about why we shouldn’t support it, at least canon-wise. Shipping Sessrin is your right, but if you don’t keep it to yourself and your corner of the fandom then you really shouldn’t be surprised by the opposition. All we ask is you respect that their specific dynamic falls under the category of child grooming (or very close) and should be treated as such in public. The world of fiction may be wider than the world we live in, but that doesn’t always mean “anything goes.” In the creative spaces our minds occupy we must still adhere to the same fundamental and moral guidelines we live by in life. There’s nothing wrong with exploring new terrains and experimenting with ideas, but we must also remember that our stories are all about communicating and connecting with people. So let’s please be more mindful of the sort of messages they’re sending. 

Besides, this isn’t only about you and what makes you feel safe, it’s about all of us. I don’t know how much more I can stress that really. How can thoughts endanger our children, you ask? Well, it’s not like we’re suggesting that our thoughts can jump out of our tvs, materialize themselves, and place kids under mind control. The forces behind fiction are a lot more complex and nuanced than a “monkey see, monkey do” approach, so don’t waste any more time trying to  describe that to us. You’re taking this argument in the wrong direction. 

Take the “violent video games breed killers” theory. I’m afraid you’re misconstruing what we’re saying and then taking it quite too literally. Please stop twisting our words, because nobody on our side is saying that just because you play violent video games that you’ll become a violent person. The Sessrin equivalent of that would be if you ship them then you must be a pedophile or turning into one. *sigh* I know you guys are feeling attacked, but I’m afraid your defensive nature is keeping you from thinking straight. Clearly, there are always exceptions (I’d recommend reading up on the Slender Man case), but Antis aren’t saying you’re one of them.

You see, it’s not so much about the content as it is the notion of the content. Kids and teens who are playing these video games have been informed that killing is wrong, because they grew up learning that early on like the rest of us. No sane person would advocate for violence and nonsensical killing in real life. Since they fully understand the severity of the consequences of killing a person in real life, they are able make a clear distinction between the two. When it comes to killing there is hardly any ambiguity. Sadly, that is far from the truth when it comes to sexualizing girls. It should immediately be perceived as wrong leaving no room for interpretation, and yet here we are still putting up with these inaccurate and demeaning female representations.

Most children who have been groomed don’t realize it till years down the road. If they aren’t ever taught the telltale signs to properly labeling grooming situations, how do you expect them to make sense of and relate to a fictional version? Let’s think of about it from a child’s perspective. Yes, this includes teens who rely pretty heavily on adult guidance and the content we put out there for them. Put yourself in their shoes for a moment and picture that you’ve never had child grooming explained to you (because that’s just the reality for so many unfortunately). Wouldn’t you say it’s possible for them to deduce that what they see on their screens is how they come to discern something in real life, especially if they have little to no experience with it? Perceived realism is plausible, y'all.

What it comes down to in the end is that the ideas and emotions we cultivate behind these stories leave an impression on others. Impressions are capable of influencing the way we see the world, which in turn affects us and beyond just our imagination. The way I look at it, stories contribute to how and why we normalize certain beliefs and trends. If fiction reflects real life like most of us tend to agree, then wouldn’t you say Sessrin is a (in)direct result of this world’s tendency to place young girls in overly sexual or romantic environments? Where do you think fiction draws its inspiration from? Sure, some of it originates from our imagination, but most of what drives us to create these stories is the real world and the people who live in it.

Fiction is meant to mirror reality, but it’s ridiculous to suggest that it’s only a one-way street. That fiction in no way, shape, or form influences our reality? Or that it only works the other way around? With all due respect, that’s simply not true. No productive discourse can be had if we choose to ignore the truth and don’t come together (at least halfway) to tackle the real issues at hand. 

Okay, I think I’ll leave it off there! Thanks so much for reading. I expect this to be my last blog on any topic regarding Inuyasha in the near future. As much as I’ve looked forward to answering all of your asks and writing all the blogs I have over these past almost 5 months, I think it’s best if I spend some time away for now. With the sequel fast approaching, I’m doing what I always do: hoping for the best and preparing for the worst. I’ve met some amazing people along the way, that’s for sure. And who knows, maybe you’ll see me active in the tags sooner than we think. Until then, it’s been an absolute pleasure! Enjoy the sequel, all of you. 💜

[mithrilwren]

Ceremony

Wedding: You touch adult humanoids willing to be bonded together in marriage. For the next 7 days, each target gains a +2 bonus to AC while they are within 30 feet of each other. A creature can benefit from this rite again only if widowed.

Over the course of the Stolen Century, Barry and Lup shamelessly exploit a convenient magical loophole.

(Also on Ao3)

---

49.

Three months into the forty-ninth year, Barry turns to look at Lup. Her face is lit by the cascade of neon flashes from the frogs in the trees above, croaking their many-coloured song, and the air is cold on his tongue, and his hand is in hers as they walk through the night air. She notices him watching. She always does, and her eyes glint in amusement: purple and azure and green and gold.

“What’re you thinking?”

He takes a breath and says, “We’re going to get married, aren’t we?”

He says it not with nervous hesitation, but with the wonder of realization, like a child dazzled at their first snowfall. Lup’s smile is wicked, but the hand around his squeezes gently.

“Well, duh.”

And they do. Not that year, because Lup’s not having a wedding on the planet of radioactive frog slime, and Barry likes the evenness of 50 for an anniversary. It’s a nicer number than 49, at any rate. Some just are.

This world ends quietly. The Hunger comes and the whole crew, safe and sound aboard the Starblaster, watches from the bridge viewport as the neon lights that once sang amidst the blanket of leaves twinkle and then fade. Not even Taako, who’d spend the whole year cursing the frogs for disturbing his sleep, says a word.

None of them has ever seen silence fall before.

They all keep quiet, and still, and then they all fade too.

50.

The fiftieth year is spent planning. Lup tells Taako about their plan, and then Taako teases her about it in front of Magnus, who can’t contain his excitement long enough for damage control and suddenly the whole crew knows that this is the year they’re finally making it official, and they are pumped. Everyone is eager to sink into any strategizing endeavour that doesn’t involve thousands of lives, and preventing the destruction thereof.

Davenport and Magnus set to work chasing the light of creation on this new world, this fiftieth home – a vast oceania, with towns dotting the edges of the many archipelagos that make up the landmass of the planet. They find it easily enough in the rocky shoals of one of the smaller islands, before the locals can get too attached to the new meteorite in their bay. With that problem squared away, everyone’s attention is back on the wedding, and the first ever IPRE Party Planning Committee is brought to order.

Taako’s got the food on lock, because of course he does, but he also helps Lup pick a dress from one of the open-aired markets in town: a breezy lilac slip with golden threads that catch the highlights in her hair.

Lucretia gets all their paperwork in order in case they want to file properly when they get back to their own world or… well, in any case, it’s good to have a record. She’s also unofficially in charge of streamers, because nobody but her and Magnus are sufficiently inoculated towards slimy ocean creatures to spend their evenings weaving strands of shimmery seaweed into party decorations.

Davenport cozies up enough to the local mayor to score some fine liquor for toasts. He sneaks a few bottles extra into his quarters, for safekeeping.

Magnus works so hard. He spends every spare minute practicing his carving, getting ready for the main event. At first, he fills Fisher’s tank with progressively more detailed ducks – an attempt to sooth the loneliness of the now-orphaned child, as much as any other purpose. But soon he hides away in a little cave by the coast, only returning to the ship to retrieve more boughs from those he collected from the forests of the previous planet. He refuses to let anyone see what he’s making until it’s absolutely finished.

Merle… frets.

“I mean, you could just ask Davenport. I figure, since he’s the captain and all... Isn’t he, you know, vested with the powers that be?”

“We could,” Lup nods. “Or we could ask you. Like we just did.”

Merle rubs at the back of his neck, using every inch of height disparity to avoid looking at Lup and Barry’s eyes. “I’m not- are you really sure you want me doing this? Me?”

“Why not you?” Barry asks, genuinely curious.

“I know I’m like, a cleric...”

“Debatable!” chimes Taako from the other side of the wall, and Merle grits his teeth just a little harder.

“Not helping, dear brother mine!” Lup calls cheerfully, and shoots a subtle charm behind her back that stands the hair on Barry’s arm on end. Moments later, there’s a thud and a slew of curses, and Lup smiles. “You were saying?”

“I’ve honestly,” Merle lowers his voice in case Taako is still in earshot. “I’ve never done one of these before. It’s the type of thing they train you for when you’re fully initiated and I never got that far. There’s special words that you’re supposed to use to complete the bonding, and a spell, and I just… I don’t want to screw this up, ok?”

“Merle,” says Lup, bending at the waist till she’s on eye level with Merle’s flushed face. “There is nothing, nothing, that you could do on my wedding day that would make me happier than to completely fuck it up. Where’s the story in perfection? Where’s the pizzazz. Say the wrong words, blow something up! I live for uncertainty.”

“Please don’t actually blow anything up if you can help it, though-” Barry interjects.

“But if you do, I’ll be behind you, 100%. As I push you between me and any sparks that get too close to the bomb-ass dress Taako and I picked out.”

“Oh yes, I feel much better now,” Merle grumbles, but he also stops arguing, which means they’ve got the priest, which is really, the last thing they needed.

Lup and Barry get up one morning – a full two months before the Hunger’s arrival – and suddenly, it’s the day. Taako forces eggs and coffee down their throats, prescribing four hundred calories apiece before they’re allowed to get dressed. Merle picks wildflowers and lays them out in matching corsages on the breakfast table before rushing off to resume his muttered practicing. Davenport and Lucretia take them each aside and help them into their outfits, and Barry has never felt more nervous in his life than as he slips on the lightweight suit. Blue, to match the sea, and because he lives to meet expectations.

And then everyone else is outside, and they’re standing hand in hand, waiting to walk down from the open door of the ship, and Barry turns to look at Lup. “We’re getting married,” he manages to get out through his rapidly closing throat.

“Sure are, champ,” she says quietly.

It’s funny. He’d always figured he��d be the first one to cry.

Everyone’s waiting when they finally step through the door. Two thick streamers of seaweed form an aisle from the gangway to where Merle stands beneath Magnus’s project: a giant archway of hewn branches, twisting eagerly in an arc towards the sky. Whatever rough patches and nicks remain in the wood are covered by intertwining flowers, perfectly matched to the garlands around their wrists. On either side of the aisle, their friends sit cross-legged in the white sand: Taako and Davenport on one side, and Lucretia and Magnus on the other. Cradled in Magnus’s lap is Fisher, who hums cheerfully at the sunlight and the joy of living, probably.

They all end up sitting in the sand, even Merle, and it feels less like a ceremony than a congregation of friends sharing a lazy afternoon, and Barry wouldn’t have it any other way. Merle stumbles his way through his lines, but he manages all right in the end, or at least Barry assumes he does. He’s too busy staring at Lup to listen, committing every second of this perfect day to memory: her loose curls twisting in the breeze, her smudged mascara, her bare feet half-buried under the sand.

When he tunes back in, it’s to the last words of Merle’s benediction, and his chest swells with warmth and love and- that’s a little too much warmth, actually, and judging by the alarmed look on Lup’s face, she’s feeling the same strange glow in her chest.

“Well, shit,” Merle breathes. “It actually worked.” Before Barry can ask, he’s patting them both gleefully on the shoulder. “By the power invested in me, apparently, you’re now husband and wife! And also, you get a bonus week of Pan’s blessing – so now’s a good time to get into a boss fight I guess, if you’re itching for one.”

Barry doesn’t hear that last part too clearly. He’s too busy being shoved into the sand by his wife oh my god oh my god and kissed senseless.

Merle wasn’t lying about the blessing either. When they’re together, there’s this warmth of surety, like anyone or anything who tried to separate them would need a miracle to succeed. Magnus accidentally hucks a rock in Lup’s direction and it glances off her shoulder like a rubber ball. Barry stubs his toe on the edge of a reef and barely feels the sting. The warmth is strongest when they’re pressed against each other, every inch of them connected, and so they stay like that for three wonderful, magical days – never out of arm’s reach.

They go swimming, just the two of them, on the fourth day. Barry’s never been so pleased that Taako taught him as he is now. They’re just twirling together, treading water out past the dropoff, and the sky is growing dark when Lup says they might to head in, it’s getting chilly, darling, and then the hail starts to fall.

At first, there are only little pieces that ping in the water all around them, nipping at their bare shoulders like blackflies as they start to swim back. Then a great chunk of ice slams into the spot Barry’s outstretched hand was reaching towards. All around them a pounding rhythm picks up pace, and Lup starts muttering shit, shit as they double their speed. Through bleary, salt-drenched eyes Barry thinks he sees the shadow of a figure standing on the shore with arms outstretched, but he can’t hear what they’re calling over the wind and the waves and the relentless pounding in his ears. All he can hear is Lup and her desperate muttering as she tries to form a sigil in the air with the hand he isn’t desperately grasping, dragging along. With a cry, she sends a blast of force cascading out in a sphere around them, and for a moment, the roar of the sea and the storm disappear and it’s just the two of them in silence, clinging to each other-

And then red blooms behind Barry’s eyes and he’s sinking and with every foot he slips the water grows colder, or maybe it’s him that’s gone cold, without her. Or-

Or-

He wakes to find Lup already wrapped around him on the Starblaster deck, and the supernatural warmth of Pan’s blessing is gone but she’s safe and he’s alive and the press of her arms is enough for him any day.

She murmurs hoarsely, words meant only for his ears, and he can tell she’s crying even without seeing her face. “These last months, Barry… god, I missed you so much, you can’t even know-” He squeezes her shoulders and she sighs, before lifting her head and declaring to the room of equally tearful onlookers,

“This man had the nerve to fucking leave me in the middle of our honeymoon? That’s it, Barry Bluejeans.” Her smile is wet and determined and beautiful.

“I demand a do-over.”

51.

For Lup, the announcement is mostly a joke, but then everyone is… kind of on board and she… kind of very much wants them to be.

She got her perfect fairytale wedding once, and she doesn’t want – doesn’t need – to replace that, but to lose her husband three days after getting him? She’s imagined some pretty bleak futures in her time, and even the worst of them didn’t tip the scale to quite that depressing. They may have all eternity to cycle. Might as well try for the perfect fairytale honeymoon too.

The second wedding is a more rushed affair. The new planet comes with warring factions and a power struggle and the Light lost somewhere in the fray of muddy battlegrounds, and it takes all of their combined efforts to retrieve the thing before one despot or another can get their hands on it. By the time they do, they’ve got less than a month till the Hunger comes, and most of the crew are footsore and weary from the last push. In fact, Lup’s pretty sure it’s not going to happen at all. She doesn’t bring it up – no use adding one more mission to the pile – but it pulls at parts of her that she’d thought she buried, the memories of lonesome nights spent wondering if there was any happiness in the world that couldn’t be taken away.  

Against all expectations, the one who brings it up is Merle.

He comes and knocks at their door and she answers, and waits patiently for him to stop shuffling his feet. Which is to say, she patiently says, “Spit it the fuck out, Merle.”

“Well, uh, what day were you wantin’ the wedding to be? Now that we’ve got this whole situation under wraps, I thought you’d-”

He doesn’t get a chance to finish the thought with his head smothered in Lup’s shirt as she pulls him into a tight hug.

The roles are different now, but maybe they all are too. The years go by quicker, and they all seem a little older with each cycle, though their bodies stay the same. Lup likes to think the change is for the better.

Davenport finds a copse of trees somehow spared the ravages of war and they set down there, working to clear the area as quickly as possible. He coordinates decorations, not refugees, and his shoulders untense for the first time in six months.

Magnus apologizes for leaving the arch behind on the last world. The apology is for Barry’s benefit, not Lup’s, because Barry doesn’t need to know that no matter how hard Magnus had worked on it, and how much she wanted to spare his feelings, Lup couldn’t bear the sight of that arch after the night of the storm. She’s not sure what he did with his creation after she told him, but she never saw it again. Maybe it’s lying at the bottom of the same ocean that Barry- nope. That’s not a thought that needs to happen.

Taako hangs fairy lights from the eaves with his wand, and they all settle in on the newly-swept ground. The world around them couldn’t be more different than a seaside paradise, but they’re all still a congregation of friends. Merle is more comfortable this time around, even injecting a couple jokes into the stuffy liturgy, and though the overwhelming exhilaration of the first wedding is dampened, there’s an ease to the affair that’s new and welcome.  

Merle places his hands on their shoulders again and says, “By the power invested in me, blah blah, you know the drill-” He startles backwards, grey eyebrows flying up into his hairline as a familiar warmth settles back into Lup’s chest. She cocks her head.

“What’s up?”

He blinks. “It’s just… the spell. The blessing from Pan. It’s a one-time-per-couple deal. You’re not supposed to be able to place it twice on the same people, not unless…”

“Go on,” she says, as he greens, suddenly cagey.

“Well, there’s a clause in the case of… if someone is widowed. Then they can get it again. Usually that means with another person though-”

“I think our whole existence is an affront to the natural order. Let’s not sweat the technicalities.” And she pulls Barry in for a kiss, because he’s her husband, and because she can.

They barely leave their room for the next week. Lup won’t admit to being afraid of the moment shattering again, and Barry is similarly reticent, and so they talk about everything else in the world except death. Barry learns a bit more about Lup and Taako’s childhood, and he tells her about the cat he rescued from a garbage can near his university, and they read, and make love, and sleep, and wake up to find the other still there. The rest of the crew give their cabin a wide berth.

It’s not quite a fairytale, but it’s nice. And that’s more than good enough.

On the evening of the seventh day, Lup is lazily drawing patterns on a sleeping Barry’s shoulder when she feels the warmth in her chest begin to ebb. She digs her nails in and shakes, heart beating too fast all at once because no, this can’t be happening, it can’t, not again, until Barry flips over with a yawn and she regains control of her lungs.

“What’s up?” he asks, and then his eyes widen, hand going to his own chest. “Guess that’s that.”

“End of the honeymoon,” she says faintly. Her chest is cold, like swallowed seawater.

“Time to rejoin the world of the living?”

“…Nah,” she says, and burrows her head back into his shoulder. His heart thuds against her ear with a gentle pulse, and she slows her breathing to match its rhythm.

They stay like that, curled into each other, until the silence is replaced by the roar of engines and Davenport’s voice through the intercom. Liftoff. Everyone to their stations. Lup closes her eyes and pulls Barry back down when he tries to get up.

She’s never been good at following orders.

58.

“Do you honestly think I would abuse Pan’s divine favour for something this trivial?” Barry, Lup, the entire cosmos sideeyes Merle. “… Yeah, fair enough. Fine,” he sighs, resigned. “Where do you want me?”

It was actually Barry’s idea. The scientist within him was burning away at the question, and true to form, Lup was just as eager to test out the constraints of any new and interesting magic.

“We can do it right here, if you want,” Barry says, gesturing down at the galley table they’re all seated at. Well, that he and Merle at seated at – technically, Lup is seated on. From the other side of the room, Lucretia pricks her ears up, obviously interested in what they’re doing, but keeping her nose firmly buried in her book.

“What, no garlands and twinkles this time around?” Merle says.

“I’ve had two beautiful wedding days already. I’m ok with this one being quick and dirty,” Lup explains.

Merle rubs his hands together, mouth twitching nervously beneath his beard. “Well, alright then. I guess we’re doing this… now?”

“Not getting any younger,” Lup says, which is both so completely true and completely untrue that Barry’s head spins too much to make a joke out of it. “Hey, Luce! Got a sec?”

Lucretia pads quietly from the other side of the room, her book still propped open in the crook of her arm. “What’s going on?”

“Getting married again, darling,” Lup says sweetly, and tugs her down till she’s seated in the chair next to Barry. “Want to be our witness?”

She looks confused a moment, but then slowly nods. “Sure. I’d be honoured.”

“Great!” Lup reaches down from her perch and ruffles her hair, which only drags a small frown to Lucretia’s face. “Let’s do this!”

Merle skips straight to the good stuff this time around, getting the blessing out in practically one breath, and Barry readies himself to feel the warmth in his chest, and-

Nothing.

“Huh,” all three of them say at once.

“Maybe Pan’s taking a nap,” Merle says. “Want me to try again?” Lucretia flips a page in her book, settling in for the long haul.

They do try again, more slowly this time, and Merle repeats every work of the liturgy, and Barry and Lup say their entire vows, and again, nothing.

“Sorry. Guess I lost my juju.”

“No, this actually tells us something interesting,” Barry reassures him. “I’d be wondering what happened to us at the end of our cycles, whether we just die and get remade, or if we blink out of reality and reappear. If we actually died, I’d assume the blessing would be nullified. Since it’s not, we can rule out death as what’s happening at the end of each year.”

“That’s only sort-of comforting, babe,” Lup says, patting his arm.

“I’m hoping neither of you are planning on dying again, just so you can reap my holy tax benefits.”

“Never,” Lup promises, and Barry thinks it’s another joke, until he turns and looks at Lup’s face. Her mouth is set in a grim line. The hand on his shoulder tightens, then tightens again. “Not if I can help it.”

59.

“Barry. Darling. Love of my life.”

“What?” he says, as Lup pulls him into her arms, back on the deck of the Starblaster once more. This time there are no tears, but she looks a little more faded than he’s ever seen her.

“Please tell me you didn’t take that crossbow bolt for science.”

He puts a hand over his chest, where only a moment before there had been a bleeding hole.

He doesn’t laugh. He doesn’t even answer. He just holds her close.

78.

They fucked up.

They fucked up, oh fuck oh f-

Lup tears her eyes away from Magnus’s limp body, sprawled across the obsidian floor mere feet from the Light, his torn shirt cast in hazy red from the streams of magma that cascade from the ceiling. Another rock breaks free and crashes to the floor, and Lup can’t see Taako anymore, she can’t see him she-

“Lup!” Barry’s hand catches her and drags her back as a spire falls onto the place she was standing, shattering into jagged shrapnel that bites at her calves and thighs. “We have to go!”

“Taako’s still-”

“Taako’s gone, Lup!”

And he is. She saw him take that fateful misstep. She saw where he fell.

Nobody, not even her, could survive that much fire.

Then run maybe ten paces before another rock crashes down in front of them and they have to pivot back towards where they came. She can’t see anyone anymore, not Davenport or Lucretia or Merle and why did they all come, why did they get this careless? Yes, the stones were heavy to move but someone should have stayed behind-

Another rock tumbles from the ceiling and smashes into Lup’s arm. She’s flung forward, nearly wrenched from Barry’s grip by the impact, half-sobbing from frustration. They can see the exit from here… but they aren’t going to make it. It’s just too far.

None of them are going to make it.

Oh, fuck.

They have to try. They have to. Even if everyone else is dead, they have to-

A hand, smaller than Barry’s, grabs her shirt by the tails and yanks her back towards the wall. She feels Barry moving in the same direction and they both slam into the stone at once, coming face to face with Merle’s sweat-stained face.

“What-” but he’s already chanting, eyes closed, muttering words too gentle for the horrific sounds of death and destruction as the room collapses around them, and when he finishes Lup’s chest warms, and warms, and she does sob now, because it feels good. It feels like hope, when there was none.

“Bring us home,” Merle says, and shoves the two of them towards the blackened cavern entrance. “Go!”

Lup tries to grab his hand but he shoves her away, and she and Barry take off running, bounding around projectiles with catlike grace as they move in sync, like they share the same body. She only looks back when their feet pass the threshold, and she sees Merle still standing there against the wall, watching them with a sad, relieved smile.

Another rock loosens. She hears the crack as it breaks away, but Lup turns before she can see where it lands.

82.

The night before the ritual, Merle takes the two of them aside.

“So,” he says. “You’re really going through with it.”

“Yeah, Merle,” says Lup. “We really are.”

He smiles, something tight and curling and frightened. “You’re sure there’s nothing I can do to change your mind?” Lup smiles back. “Didn’t think so, but I had to ask.” He takes out his book, and both Barry and Lup frown in confusion as he flips it open to a familiar page. “One last time, for old time’s sake?”

They look at each other. “Why?” asks Barry. “Once we’re liches, I’m sure the spell will dissipate. I doubt it transfers between metaphysical bodies.”

Merle snorts out through his nose, then turns his head away, rubbing one heel of his hand against his cheek, just above the tufts of his white beard. “Yeah,” he says. “You’re probably right.” His voice goes husky near the middle, but he refinds its center before he turns back to them. “But this is what I can do, so if there’s even a chance that’ll it’ll help…”

“Then we’ll take it,” Lup says, grabbing Merle’s hand before he can close the book. “Shit. Thank you.”

“Thanks for what? I haven’t done nothing yet.”

“For everything.” She swallows. “For everything. And if this doesn’t work-”

“Lup-“ Barry warns.

“If this doesn’t work,” Lup continues. “I just need you to know that. Alright? You did everything you could.”

“What are you talking about?” Merle laughs. “Of course it’s going to work. I’ve done it five times now. Have a little more faith.” He looks at Lup, and she looks at him, and their shared gaze is warm, and understanding. “So don’t you worry, I’m going to take good care of both of you. That’s my job.”

“Thanks, Merle,” Barry says, echoing loops words, and Merle’s wobbling tone.

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s do this.” He takes both their hands and places them on top of the book. “By the powers vested in me…”

Merle’s words fade out as Barry looks at Lup. Her brilliant eyes meet his, and even as the warmth swells, the look they share is one of farewell.

No matter what happens tomorrow, this’ll be the last time they share this.

But no matter what happens, they’re going to be together.

Come hell or high water, he’s never going to leave her alone again.

~&$(No DATE given@(*#

It’s cold up here, in the sky.

Barry wraps his jacket around Lup’s shoulders, and she leans in under his arm, swinging her legs to keep warm, or just to keep moving. Her bare feet flicker as the lights below pass by – a sparkling metropolis by the sea, and they can see it all from their perch on the last metal outcropping of the base: Neverwinter, in all its evening glory. After everything, impossibly, safe and sound.

Lup slides a little farther, sticking her big toe out as far as she can reach it, and suddenly the entire foot becomes buoyant, like it weighs nothing at all. Lup giggles at the sudden loss of gravity, and Barry redoubles his grip on the fluttering pages in his lap.

It figures, that Lucretia would have still had these. If there’s one thing she takes seriously, it’s her paperwork.

“What do’ya think?” Lup says. “If I spit, do you think it would hit someone, or would it just burn up in the atmosphere?” Before he gets a chance to answer, she hocks a loogie and lets it fly. They both watch the orb of spit vanish into the frosty air.

“It’s more likely that it’ll find its way back around the moon and land on someone up here.”

“Even better.” Lup grins, and Barry pulls her in all the tighter.

He’s missed this.

He’s missed so much, and this most of all.

“This feels silly,” he admits, shuffling through the papers. “I don’t even know why Lucretia wanted them in the first place. It’s not like we even officially exist anymore. Nobody’s going to come checking to see if our personnel records are up to date.”

“Yeah, but what Luce wants, Luce gets,” and there’s a bite to the words that wasn’t there before, and the air gets a little colder, and he shivers for the both of them.

Even with so many things mended, there are some they can’t undo.

Still, Lup’s voice softens as she takes the first page and holds it up to the light of the second moon, the real moon. “You sure you don’t want one last ceremony? Just for old times’ sake?”

He chuckles, imagining Merle’s face if they asked. “I’m good. All I want is you, at my side, forever and always.”

“That’s some corny shit, Bluejeans.” He shrugs, and she tucks her feet back up under her. “But you know I love it.” She puts the page back down onto the pile and pulls a pen out from behind her ear, then passes it to Barry. “So, what do you say? Will you make me an honest woman, officially?”

In every lifetime, in every moment, past and present, his answer has never changed.

“Yes. I will.”

He takes the pen and scribbles his name down on the dotted line, then passes the pen back. Lup adds her own signature to the other, and they both sit back, staring at the blocky letters of script at the top of the page.

Certificate of Marriage

No ceremony, no warmth, no mystical connection. They set the papers aside and kiss under the lights from above and below, and it’s only them, and that’s plenty. That’s all they need to be.

Forever and always, connected.

[chaoticspacefam]

OC Worldbuilding Tag Pt 2!

...electric boogaloo! I’m sorry I know this joke is old now but I cannot help it, it’s ingrained in my brain XD

I got another tag for this from @a-master-procrastinator , thank you! :D

I think all my friends & mutuals have already been tagged for this one? But I’ll throw a couple out here if you want to, no pressure as always!: @mercurypilgrim​ , @actualanxiousswampwitch and @sleepswithvillains maybe?

Some more Saarai, because I love her. Some very slight spoilers for some of the differences in the Subterfugeverse plot points but nothing major! ;3 Long post warning again, as well as some brief mentions of Valkorion being a dick and causing a mass-genocide but all on the same level as the presented game canon.

- Saarai is psychometric and has been since she was pretty young, a Force power she inherited from D’leah’s mother, Saa’thri, because it “skipped” D’leah and Saarai got it instead. Though she didn’t realise it at the time and it wasn’t until she brought it up to her mother and D’leah went “oh yeah, your grandma had that too :)” that she realised it was actually A Thing.

- She’s not always good at recognising when a vision is from the Psychometry and when it’s just “her imagination”, particularly when she’s younger (which gets her into some trouble, see: the whole Tsâhis thing). Even after she gets used to it, sometimes it still hits her out of nowhere and if it’s a particularly nasty vision she’ll sometimes lose her footing and hit the deck - thankfully, because of their Force bond, Ni’kasi can usually figure out what’s happening and react fast enough to catch her before she smacks her head on something.

- Nathema was...not fun for Saarai thanks to the Psychometry. She’d wanted to go with them to protect them and ended up having to be dragged back to the ship and wait there because the moment she tried to touch anything there the Force went “Oh hey!! would you like some Detailed Flashbacks About What Happened Here!!” and yeah...she did not have a good time. Going to Nathema was kind of a mistake for her. Woops. (She gets through it though, Lana gets her back to the ship and she gets a handle on things but definitely doesn’t go all the way into the facility with Vano and Lana. Probably a good thing, too, if she’d picked up that toy of Vaylin’s I think she would’ve found those visions quite upsetting to watch, too.)

- She and Lana don’t share a Force bond, only because she has one with her sister, Ni’kasi instead. Neither of the twins are exactly sure when it formed, but they’ve had the connection for as long as they can remember. When they’re separated while Saarai and Ty are on Rishii, it’s harder for them to communicate because of the distance between them and Kas putting up barriers “just in case” the Sith tried to interrogate her at any point, she didn’t want to give Saarai away. They knew enough to know the other twin was probably still alive, but not to know exactly what was going on with each other until they finally reunite with the first Coalition on Yavin IV. That was the final relief for the twins, actually getting to see the other one standing there and definitely very much alive, there were hugs and a lot of tears, absolutely. <3

- Saarai is very much a “reluctant leader”, she never wanted to be a figurehead in the Alliance nor did she want to be telling people what to do, but circumstances “forced” her into the role and she had to stumble around awkwardly and adapt. With Vano gone and stuck in carbonite, somone had to step up and make sure the people that were working with Vano stuck together and didn’t fall apart (Not all of Vano’s crew disperse, Broonmark, Pierce and Jaesa always remain with the Alliance. Quinn ends up in jail after the Quinncident and Vette goes missing during one of their attempts to search for Vano’s whereabouts only to reappear as in canon later ;)) With Marr dead and the rest of the Dark Council under Zakuul’s heel or missing, that left Lana, Ni’kasi and Aria as alternative “leadership” figures. Lana lacked the ambition for it and was more tooled to be an advisor and while both Ni’kasi and Aria are bossy enough to delegate tasks, they’re abrasive and people don’t like them. But they like Saarai and they listen to her. So everyone kinda went “Okay cool you’re in charge now :)” I’m sorry, Saarai, you’re symultaneously the most and least qualified for this job but you got it anyway :P She settles into it eventually, though, but will be the first one to adamantly insist that it’s a team effort between not only herself and Vano once they have her back, but Lana, Koth, Theron and all the other trusted members of the Alliance acting as advisors in their respective fields of interest.

- In Subterfugeverse, I headcanon that Vano and Saarai share the command of the Alliance once Vano returns. Vano has the Commander title and handles most of the battle tactics and strategy, whereas Saarai handles things like conflict resolution and public relations, as well as controlling the Eternal Fleet. Things work very differently in Subterfugeverse in terms of the Throne so I’ll try to keep it brief but essentially:

Valkorion “took over” the Sith Empire from the Ahaszaai, Saarai’s ancestors. It was a very hostile takeover and currently Saarai, Ni’kasi, Ty, eventually Ni’kasi’s kids, and their uncle Vowrawn are the only four Ahaszaai left in the entire galaxy.

While they didn’t technically have claim to the Zakuulan throne, the original Sith homeworld before Valkorion’s bullshit was Medriaas (which is canon, I’m just borrowing this part because it fits in nicely ;)), which became Nathema after Valkorion did his whole “planet eating” thing.

Vano is initially the only one who can control the Throne and the Fleet via the whole “Valkorion is in her head” loophole. However, that loophole becomes defunct once Valkorion gets yanked out of her mind since it was Valkorion that gave her the ability to control it in the first place.

I’m assuming for the sake of plot flow that it’s based upon two specific “checks” and that’s 1) direct blood ties to the Emperor(ess) in power and/or 2) said Emperor(ess) currently controlling the throne directly and willingly passing their authority over the throne to a successor - which is how Valkorion is able to give the Outlander/Vano control of the Fleet while he’s in her mind, even though she’s not blood related to him.

They’re able to, with some research, deduce that they can exploit this apparent loophole in the system, to avoid losing control of the Fleet entirely and risking any of the GEMINI droids turning into another SCORPIO; and Vano essentially rescinds control of the Throne/Fleet to Saarai, everyone (including Ni’kasi herself) agrees that Saarai is the responsible choice because she’s not going to get a bee in her bonnet and with an errant thought accidentally set the Eternal Fleet on the Jedi or something of the sort.

Since Saarai has direct blood ties to the original ruling Sith before Valkorion userped the title from them, and Vano willingly gave the Throne up to her, the Throne can’t throw a tantrum about it and just has to deal with it. XD

- Once they do manage to track down where Vano is, before Lana and Koth head to Zakuul to actually break her out, Lana comes to Saarai for help with that. Ni’kasi has to stay to watch Ty and also try and keep a tenuous line with the other Sith thanks to her position on the Dark Council, Aria’s too emotionally charged to think straight and Lana is rightfully worried she might make a mistake that puts the whole rescue mission in jeapordy, so they ask Saarai instead. It’s kind of awkward and she and Koth rub each other the wrong way at first, they bicker for two thirds of the entire trip there and Lana almost throws them both out of the airlock for it, but eventually do find a way to bury the hatchet before they actually arrive at Zakuul to rescue Vano.

- By the time they find the Gravestone, Saarai and Koth have made up and though they are not yet involved with eachother at that time, have both agreed that fighting over Lana is stupid and they can make this work without making things difficult for anyone else, so the whole interruption in the Gravestone’s cargo hold, for Subterfugeverse, is genuinely an accident. Saarai heads up to check on him afterwards and they have another amicable and productive conversation and end up growing a little closer. Their side of the relationship is a little slower to form, but they do eventually end up developing deeper feelings for each other, though it’s strictly non-sexual between Rai and Koth and they are both 100% happy and okay with that.

[autumnblogs]

Day 9: Troll Time

Time to get trolled.

https://homestuck.com/story/1527

This is the first of the events that I’ve noticed enough to talk about in Homestuck that alludes to the Alpha Kids. While Roxy on the other side of the scratch is the one actually responsible for the disappearance of Jaspers and the Pumpkins, at this point in the story, we have some pretty good suspects for exactly who disappeared both of them.

I could see myself guessing that Jade’s penpal is one of the trolls, but it wouldn’t be my first guess. I’m going to pay close attention to all of the events on one side of the scratch that are caused by the other side of the scratch, because my theory is that a Scratched Universe, more than anything else, is really terminated rather than truly being retroactively erased. Too much doesn’t make sense from a causal perspective (not necessarily from a temporally linear one) if a scratched universe is actually erased entirely, or even if it is closed off from the rest of existence - why can information enter and leave a Scratched Universe at all from an outside perspective, for example?

Are Side A Side B teleporters, appearifiers, and so on and so on, loopholes? Maybe it has something to do with the nature of Void, the Furthest Ring, and their seeming exclusion from the rules the rest of Paradox Space is required to follow.

The Doylist answer, which in Homestuck is also allowed to be the Watsonian answer, might be that while a Scratched Universe is *materially* erased, information about it is still permitted to propagate through narrative contrivances such as the author. Fenestrated planes can easily be considered narrative contrivances, but if we use this as our theory, it seems like Appearifiers and Sendificators would also have to be Narrative Contrivances (which I’m going to spell with a capital NC from here on out.) I... actually don’t have a problem with this hypothesis, so it’s what I’m going with. Also, since a friend of mine who’s reading this liveblog asked, I’m going to post a link to the tvtropes article on those two terms at the start of this paragraph for anyone who doesn’t know what I’m talking about.

Perhaps, given the proclivity for the Void to preserve lost information in the form of dreams and memories, and given the nature of Space as the medium through which events normally propagate (as well as the fundamental medium of storytelling from which all other storytelling mediums derive their medium-ness), and their proximity on the Aspect Wheel, Narrative Contrivances are objects which have are shared between these two domains - as objects associated with the Void, Narrative Contrivances are permitted to follow their own set of rules which to someone outside of the universe are obvious, but to anyone inside the universe are a complete black box, and as objects associated with Space, Narrative Contrivances function as a means by which to propagate information in such a way as to preserve causality, the logical topology of Paradox Space, and with them, the self-fulfilling nature of Paradox Space. They allow the world-line of objects travelling through the narrative to remain consistent, even when they would violate material geographical conventions.

This description of Narrative Contrivances makes me think a lot of things could be Narrative Contrivances, like First Guardians, for example, who can violate the speed of light.

This is all a lot of silly bullshit, but it’s fun to come up with theories to describe and predict Homestuck (and future Homestuck works, even though I’m not terribly invested in them.)

This has been a long Cold Open. More after the break.

https://homestuck.com/story/1529

John gets cyberbullied!

Man. Cyberbullying has really gone from being an individual concern to being an apocalyptic issue. Who knew? Maybe in writing the trolls and their cyberbullying as being inextricable from the apocalypse, Andrew Hussie predicted this.

I’m not trying to understate John’s issues by comparing them to stuff like massive social media disinformation campaigns - receiving Death Threats as a thirteen year old is terrifying, and on a general level, the fact that this kind of horrible shit was commonplace in the earliest days of social media should have been a big indicator that what was yet to come was going to be so, so much worse.

I’m also not trying to jocularly exaggerate the threat that almost completely lawless social media has on society. If you haven’t already, check out the excellent documentary The Social Dilemma, and then delete your Facebook account if you haven’t already (and since you’re reading my extremely anti-capitalist anti-patriarchy liveblog on tumblr, you’ve probably already done that. If you have, good for you!) And your twitter for good measure, come on, you know who you are. Mabe your tumblr too while you’re at it.

Cyberbullying is part of a larger theme in Homestuck, another one of those things that it’s Capital A About. As a work that is not only about growing up, but specifically about growing up in the information age, Homestuck is repeatedly about the ways that Social Media don’t just bring us together, but keep us apart from one another. Cyberbullying is one of the effects of Social Media pushing people apart - it’s so, so much easier to threaten to kill someone when you don’t have to look them in the eye while you’re doing it, and when you have the anonymity of a string of alphanumeric characters as a name to hide behind.

https://homestuck.com/story/1537

The Black Queen is a very bad woman. It’s always intrigued me that the Queens allow their counterparts’ agents free movement through their territory like this even on the eve (or the advent?) of full-scale war between their kingdoms. PM is just allowed to wander around Derse unsupervised.

I suppose that if even God and Satan can afford each other a bit of token civility while discussing the fates of sinners, so can Prospitians and Dersites.

https://homestuck.com/story/1542

@zeetheus​ John’s definitely proceeds Rose’s bluh.

Rose sips her Mom’s martini for the same reason that she later falls prey to alcoholism. Trying to grow up without help, Rose interprets the martini as a symbol of parental authority, the same way that she interprets the partaking of beverages in general as being a ritual of intimacy with her Mother. Empty signifiers.

https://homestuck.com/story/1549

Jack Noir’s grating voice is so outrageously distracting that it prevents itself as an intrusive thought in the Narrative for PM.

Actually, come to think of it, *all* of the Carapacians talk pretty much exclusively via narration. I wonder if that’s representative of an altered relationship with their narrative reality, which is the first time ever I’ve had that thought pretty much at all.

I always just chalked it up to one of the quirks of Andrew’s writing style, but especially when we take into account the fact that Homestuck is as metanarrative as it is, and that Carapacians are the only characters in Homestuck Proper who interface with the narrative prompt except for the audience, Andrew, and Caliborn himself, I can’t help but wonder. Maybe as living gaming abstractions, in spite of their limited intelligence and abilities, Carapacians have a unique relationship with the narrative laws of Paradox Space (perhaps in the same way that Narrative Contrivances do?)

https://homestuck.com/story/1569

Riffing a little more on the “Fetch Modus as analogous to thought processes” motif previously introduced, Jade’s excellent visualization abilities and vivid imagination serve her well as a Space Player, but tend to misfire, running wild, and seeing patterns where they don’t exist (intrusive thoughts make her see Johnny 5 in her Eclectic Bass and whatever the fuck mecha she’s about to accidentally imagine, I don’t know, I’m not a weeb.) Jade sure does think about robots a lot.

https://homestuck.com/story/1579

I have to say, I consider Terezi’s manipulative abilities to be genuinely pretty strong. I have never known a better way to strongarm me than by pointing out traits that I don’t know whether I feel good or bad about - it just terminates my thought processes.

Although in John’s case, it helps that he is, in fact, a weenie, a stooge, and most importantly, a nice guy. All these facts make him extra manipulatable.

https://homestuck.com/story/1584

<3

I have no reason to believe everyone in Homestuck’s universe isn’t stupidly badass, but I choose to believe that no one is as stupidly badass as the leads because it makes me happy to imagine that these kids are just ridiculously OP superhumans.

(That said, it’s kind of fucked up the level of violence that these literal children are involved in, maybe I shouldn’t get so excited about it. Should we be enthusiastic about the kids’ triumph over their dangerous enemies? Horrified by the travails they are being put through? Probably both motherfuckin’ things.

https://homestuck.com/story/1588

I think about this page a lot.

Rose Lalonde is a very dangerous young lady. She is ruthless, pragmatic, calculating, and cool. She’s even a killer, and literally just killed two imps before fighting this Ogre!

Why is she choosing to show mercy to it now? Is she just trying to get Dave’s goat? Maybe the answer is, deep down, she doesn’t really want to hurt anyone or anything.

https://homestuck.com/story/1589

Kanaya and Dave have a great relationship and I love them as friends very much. I wish dearly that there was more of them in the webcomic. They have approximately the same relationship with authenticity, which is to say that they don’t have an insincere bone in their respective bodies, but practice insincerity nonetheless to impress someone they care about.

For Kanaya relating to Rose, I think it’s a lot more innocent.

https://homestuck.com/story/1590

The least eloquent character in Homestuck has his brief, and I’m pretty sure only encounter with the most eloquent character in Homestuck.

Poor, poor Tavros. While Rose is pretty much always on this level, it seems a lot more innocuous when she’s talking to her friends, or the more mean-spirited and (relatively) competent trolls, the way she treats Tavros almost feels like bullying because of how obviously pathetic he is.

That said, he turns right around, and invokes exactly what’s coming to him. Y’know as much as Tavros is an authentic abuse victim and Vriska gaslights him into thinking a lot of the bad things that happen to him are his fault, there are a lot of times where he does stupid shit that invokes the justifiable wrath of the people around him.

https://homestuck.com/story/1592

While I could pontificate about the fact that Kanaya and Rose are my favorite couple, and squee enthusiastically, instead I will call attention to the fact that, by way of mixing her metaphors, Kanaya has been the victim of an authorial pun - she’s a Fruit Ninja. (Unless Fruit Ninja didn’t exist at the time of writing? It may very well not have.)

https://homestuck.com/story/1596

As the Page of Breath, Tavros sucks at communicating. Here, he sucks at communicating because in spite of his objectively pretty sick rhymes... he is talking to someone who just can’t be arsed.

https://homestuck.com/story/1602

This is one of those absurd moments that at first blush seems meaningless, but I think helps to decipher the kinds of things that John Egbert cares about. It’s one of the moments where he ritualizes an action that one of his heroes takes - John Egbert thinks that Nic Cage is cool, and wants to be like him, so he roleplays Nic Cage for a little while.

https://homestuck.com/story/1603

We’ve barely met the trolls, and they are *already* using the humans as a convenient method to troll each other instead of staying on task.

Karkat also establishes his love of RomComs before his introduction even rolls around.

https://homestuck.com/story/1618

Conceding ground to implacable enemies is generally the correct means to win in Homestuck, usually by getting them to destroy themselves or each other purely by their own unsustainably wicked or stupid conduct. Only a being as powerful as Lord English is sufficient to destroy the Significance-hoarding antagonist that is Vriska, as she threatens to overshadow everyone else in the universe by her own inflated self-importance. Only Vriska, so arbitrarily lucky, could possibly get into position to destroy Lord English. They were made for each other. They deserve each other.

One of my favorite dialogues in the whole comic. Man, I sure love Act 4. There’s something indescribable about the dialogue Andrew writes for this part of the comic. Homestuck at its best whiplashes from silly to scary to heartbreaking to heartwarming, and back to silly again, from beautiful to ugly, and I don’t think that even Act 5, as it piles up layers upon layers, well past the number of parts needed to make a whole, captures the essence of Homestuck as well as does Act 4.

Homestuck is different in every part, of course, and for everyone who says that Act 4 is peak Homestuck you will meet someone who says that Acts 1 through 3 were peak Homestuck, or who says that Act 5 was Peak Homestuck, or that Act 6 was Peak Homestuck. I do not mean to demean any portion of the work by saying that Act 4 is my favorite. The things I like in Homestuck the most are just the most themselves in this portion of the story.

https://homestuck.com/story/1627

I’m feeling less and less intelligent as I read more and more of Homestuck, because honestly, my theories read less like honest-to-god insights, and more like somebody who just wasn’t paying any fucking attention. Here, Jade spells out basically what I’ve been saying.

https://homestuck.com/story/1640

We’ll pause here for the evening. Reading was a little sparse today, but it’s a good place to leave off, especially since for some of these I wrote just stacks of theorizing.

Until tomorrow, Cam signing off, Mostly alive except for a bit of a cough, and not alone.

[lifewithchronicpain-original]

So the grocery store that I work at (as a cashier) won't let me get a stool to sit at while I work because it's a tripping hazard. Instead, they are "letting me" sit down on the bagging area when no customers are there... which I was already doing. I feel so helpless, if my doctor can't even advocate for me what can I expect to be able to do myself? I'm in so much pain and now I feel so stupid for getting my hopes up.

You have my deepest sympathies, I know this situation all too well. It was 2006, I was working at a sub shop, the last customer service job I had before working in an office for the next 10 years. At the time I had that cyst I’ve talked about, and sitting made the pain go away. But god forbid I grab a stool for myself and still get up when needed to grab pick up and in store orders.

See they’re not worried about you tripping, they’re worried about setting a precedent. They don’t want anyone else to say “well I have some back/foot pain can I sit too?” Which really should be a yes anyway imo, whether it’s just general aches and pains or serious problem like yours.

I wish I could share with you some way to get them to comply, but if you don’t have the power to sue, they will always search for a loophole to deny your accommodation while still claiming to help. Even though imo, sitting in bagging areas looks worse than just giving people a goddamn stool. I would have to take mini brakes to sit or I would have to bend over behind the counter and brace my ass on a low shelf. How does that look better? And it’s not like employees with stools don’t work, my first job was a game room attendendant and then bowling alley attendant. They let you sit, everyone jumped for a customer and they get mad at anyone sitting who hasn’t made sure it was clean before sitting. I knew it could be done they just didn’t want to.

Now I’m at home disabled because my city office job also did not want to set a precedent of people working at home. My union rep desperately looked for anyone given the accommodation and couldn’t find one. Now I imagine many are working at home because city jobs just can’t stop. I remember too they gave me a list of every single little accommodation to date as a reason not to comply. Like I had used up all my requests and it was not evidence of someone getting sicker and sicker. I remember seeing that list and knowing in my heart of hearts they don’t believe im as disabled as I say I am and if they do they don’t care. My job was lost and I hung onto it a little longer to have money for my sisters wedding. I quit two weeks before, lucky enough to have a job with decent retirement plan that I could cash out immediately and survive on until disability came through. I was actually approved on the first go around but because I got a tax return over 2k, (by claiming disability, or had never been that high before then) and even though I spent much of it immediately they took note and I had to wait a few months longer.

All I can say to you is this, sometimes in getting those earlier accommodations I might have needed more than one letter because my doctor wasn’t specific enough. You doctor has to walk a line of patient confidentiality and also being the proof behind your need. I would try going to the doctor again, make sure you know exactly why the first letter was denied, and tell the doctor what they’re looking for. I would also instruct the doctor to say specifically that you need to be able to sit properly in a chair or stool but still will be able to stand for short periods and move around for bagging and such. I would even maybe see if you can include something about balance not being an issue and tripping over the stool is of less risk than working in such pain. Maybe with a more detailed and to the point letter they must comply. But they might also find another loophole. It fucking sucks.

So my last recommendation to you is forever be on the lookout for another job because a job that won’t accommodate you is also a job that could potentially fire you over your disability, such as taking too much sick time. Protect yourself as best you can. Try again but look elsewhere or even brace yourself for the possibility of disability. You can apply while you still work, your disability starts when your doctor says it does not when you finally have to leave your job.

I hope this has been a helpful response even though it is a little depressing. I hope someday we can get an ADA law with far more teeth so those who can’t sue have some fucking recourse because this really is ridiculous. In any case, i wish you the best. 💖

[salvatoreschool]

‘Legacies’ season 2 spring finale review: Evil is only as powerful as you let it be

For an impromptu end, the Legacies season 2 spring finale was one hell of an episode. Congrats to the whole Legacies team for letting us end season 2 (for now) in such epic style!

So, last episode ended with Hope asleep (and in Josie’s mind), Landon dead, Raf zombified, Lizzie pretending to be dead, and the rest doing their best to play up Lizzie’s death so Darth Josie wouldn’t catch on to their plan.

That’s a hell of a lot to try and wrap up in one episode, but I was SERIOUSLY impressed with how well this episode worked as a finale. I mean, yes, of course I’m desperate to know why Hope is still seemingly stuck in Josie’s mind, and why Landon hasn’t woken up if the Necromancer did his part. But I’m also really glad that we have some threads left open ended to pull on this summer while we wait for news regarding when it will be safe for the Legacies cast and crew to return to set. I’m sure they’re as eager to film those last four episodes (including that confirmed musical ep!) as we are to see them, but first and foremost, it must be safe for them to return.

That all said, here’s my full review of all the craziest bits of the Legacies season 2 spring finale:

Of course Josie’s subconscious is a fairytale world

I mean, we knew it from the previews already, but it makes a lot of sense. And I hope that now that she’s rewriting the story, her subconscious world will morph and change to fit the woman who dreamed it up.

If we ever end up in Josie’s subconscious again, I hope we find it a different sort of fairytale kingdom. One where the princess is a little more fierce and badass, while still maintaining that sense of goodness, with the same kind heart and good humor.

Dark Josie reigns supreme

I’m thinking in the hierarchy of villains, she’s somewhere underneath Malivore, and probably Kai, too, but definitely higher than Clark or the Necromancer or pretty much any of the singular monsters from last season. For some reason, that black magic energy is just so much more powerful than almost anything else we’ve seen on Legacies so far.

There are a couple TVD era villains I can think of (the Mikaelsons anyone?) that would give her a run for her money, but she’s gonna rank pretty high on the Legacies villain list for a long time.

Hope is Lizzie and Lizzie is Hope

I gotta say, Danielle Rose Russell does a mean Lizzie Saltzman. I bought it hook, line, and sinker. It must have been a lot of fun for Danielle to get to do something a little different for a change than more of Hope’s tortured hero drama. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love me some Hope-saved-the-world-and-all-she-got-for-her-trouble-was-this-black-puddle-of-goo drama, but it was nice to see one of the show’s strongest actors get to flex a different muscle for a bit in the Legacies season 2 spring finale.

So, what exactly happened to Landon?

Last episode he was stabbed by Raf with the golden arrow. I really believed that when they pulled it out, he would start his resurrection cycle again, but no such luck. Raf is holding the arrow when he brings Dr. Saltzman down to take a look, and at no point in the course of this episode did it appear that Landon was even thinking of bursting into phoenix-y flames.

So, is Landon dead? Or just stuck like it seems Hope probably is at the end of the episode? Well, we have a bit of a wait til we find out, but let the conjecture begin!

No nonconsensual kissing for these fairy tale ladies

I know, I know. When we start thinking in fairy tale tropes, it’s easy to start believing in true love’s kiss, but I actually really like the stand the writers took in this episode. You have to be the change you want to see in the world, and, in order to re-write tropes like those of Snow White and Prince Charming, you have to start somewhere. Why not our little supernatural show about witches, vampires, wolves, and the menagerie of monsters they had no idea they were sharing a world with.

Little Red Riding Witch vs. the Big Bad Wolf Queen

I find it interesting that Hope was able to fend off the darkness pretty well until it took Josie form. Is Hope just reluctant to hurt someone who looks like Josie, even if she is in her evil form? I think that may have been part of the case, here. Plus, it’s nice to know that Josie had the power to tame her darkest impulses all on her own.

Lizzie’s gets a major dose of truth

It’s really unfortunate that everyone has fallen into this ‘Lizzie is terrible’ schtick, but it was probably good for her to hear. Lizzie is so self-assured in her popularity that she doesn’t see the forest for the trees. She can think of how each and every person treats her in one on one situations and such, but she doesn’t take a look at the big picture very often. I’m sure even Lizzie would have noticed that the other students more fear her than love her.

But at the same time, Lizzie’s bravado is a delicate facade. Just underneath that thin, flimsy coating of “thick skin” she pretends to have, is a girl who just wants to be liked. She just wants to know that when she sacrifices herself to save her school and her sister, that someone will have nice things to say about her and a few nice memories to carry her on with.

Jed and Kaleb’s riff off

This whole Jed and Kaleb competition for Alyssa Chang’s affection is kind of hilarious. Them having a riff off full of skilled (and some rawer talent) runs in the middle of Lizzie’s fake funeral was adorable. I mean, that was a terrible memorial, but at least it helped dissolve a little of the tension already ramping up in this episode.

Oh, and if their bonding over Alyssa’s flaws means a new bromance is born, I am SO here for that, too.

A deal with the devil… adjacent

In order to save Josie from the black magic churning through her cells, Alaric had to make a deal with the Necromancer. Since our zombie-creator found himself powerless against the powers of Lord Josiemort, he knew there was only one way to get her out of his life and himself back in the driver’s seat. Returning Raf and Alyssa to actual life and (supposedly) reviving Landon was just a trade off. The real choice was between giving all Josie’s black magic to the Necromancer and giving him a supercharge of his power or letting her fall deeper and deeper into the evil coursing through her veins.

The unbreakable covenant spell

Eerily reminiscent of the Unbreakable Vow from Harry Potter, the Necromancer agrees to be bound by their deal. In order to assure Alaric that he would hold up his end of the deal, the Necromancer breaks out the Unbreakable Covenant Spell, which would require each party to hold up their entire end of the deal to reap the benefits. This is why I’m sure beyond sureness that whatever’s keeping Hope asleep is affecting Landon, too… somehow.

Enter M.G. and his unique ability to speak Lizzie

Only someone who truly knows Lizzie down to her soul could have turned an entire room of people laughing at her into a crowd that remembers their friend fondly. I would have loved to hear more of their remembrances of the nice things that Lizzie did for them. For every wild, crazy thing she’s done, there’s something downright sweet to balance the scale.

It shows how much M.G. really truly cares for Lizzie. It’s not just a crush or some teen hormonal thing. He loves that girl. He knows her down to her marrow. And every wonderful thing he does for her brings her closer and closer to seeing how incredible his belief in her is. And only someone who believes in the good in her is going to be able to win her heart. I can’t wait to see her crush on him next season. It’s coming, I can feel it.

The actual fairy tale narrative

First of all, Evil Queen Josie’s armor outfit was STUNNING. So freaking gorgeous, even in all black.

I love that, in the end, Josie and Lizzie were both so afraid to hurt each other that they found themselves second class citizens in their own lives. Last episode, Lizzie had to choose herself in order to even have a chance to beat Josie in the Merge. In the Legacies season 2 spring finale, Josie has to set aside her fears of being powerful enough to beat Lizzie in order to push Dark Josie out of power.

Josie takes a break?

Toting all that power around for so long seems to have worn Josie out a bit. It might be a good thing for her to take a step back from her power for a bit. I’m interested to know what might be important enough for her to restore her magic. Who will have to be in life threatening peril for her to jump back into the fray?

They like me! They really like me!

Lizzie’s look of incredulity when the other witches who spent most of the day badmouthing her showed up at the lakeside to celebrate her life.

Thank you, ‘Legacies’ writers, for bringing Raf and Alyssa back to the land of the living

Poor Rafael has been through enough. He’s had the shit end of the stick so far this season, so I hope that now that his heart is beating again, he can have something go his way for once. Landon coming back would be a start, but something else would be nice, too. Maybe a nice new romance or bromance? Raf needs more people in his life than just the two people who love him the most, and bring him the most pain, too.

So, did Alaric and the Necromancer go through with their Unbreakable Covenant?

If they cast that spell over their deal, then the Necromancer HAS restored Landon and his perma-sleep is being caused by something else. OR, and there’s a decent chance of this, the Necromancer uses a loophole of never declaring WHEN he would restore Landon to his body, and the Necromancer is delaying raising Landon until the opportune moment, which will undoubtedly involve Malivore and probably Clark, too.

What did you think of the ‘Legacies’ season 2 spring finale?

[stefanmikaleson1864]

A Brand New Life

Here is the Elijah dad story i have been promising. I’m gonna post a part two with Elijah actually finding out don’t worry i just didn’t write to much in one I Hope you all like and enjoy it and as always i love feedback 

Disclamier this gif does not belong to me and all credit to the owner and i know it’s a different character i just like the pic 

Sitting on the big king size bed you shared with your boyfriend  Elijah you sighed throwing another grimoire on the floor and throwing your head back on the mountain of pillows and closing your eyes. 

You had been hard at work all day trying to come up with a spell you could use to be able to have children with your husband and him being an original the idea most would say would be pointless to even try.

 You know those people were right but you wouldn’t let it stop you. There was always a loophole in nature and you were determined to find this one.

 You didn’t tell Elijah because you didn’t want to get his hopes up. You knew his whole time on this earth it was always his desire to have kids of his own. You didn't want to tourte him with hope it would be too cruel.  There was no giving up though even if you had to travel to the ends of the earth you would find a way. 

After being consumed by your thoughts you haven’t even realised Elijah walking in and hovering over you and gently stroking you face with his finger until you woke up. 

You felt his movements and gently opened up your eyes while smiling at him even after 30 years of being together, it still felt like the honeymoon phase never ended, Your stomach rumbling with butterflies and your cheeks turning a bright pink.

 He smiled down at you 

“Well hello love everything okay ? He asked looking around the mess you made in the bedroom. 

“Yeah just working on some new spells Davina asked for my help so i’ve been busy reading up.” 

“I see and this simply nothing to do with the conversation we had earlier.” He said to you while pushing you hair behind your ears.

“ No Love i’m not naive you know i know it can’t be.” I said with a hint of sadness in my voice. 

The conversation earlier was something that was spoken many times between the two of us. About wanting a family each time coming up with different ways it could happen Adoption? Surrogacy ?

 And each time it was something stopping us and honestly i wanted to be able to carry our child. At least for the first time and down the road after that who knows. 

After seeing Klaus and Haliey with Hope earlier you couldn’t help feeling jealous not that you weren’t happy for them you just longed for what they had. 

Elijah knew you felt like that and he felt guilty because if you were with any one else you could of had your dreams but that wasn’t the case you didn’t want a family with anyone else just Elijah but he still felt that way. 

Elijah bent down and kissed you in an attempt to snap you from your thoughts. It worked as you did in effect go you out of your head and you deepened the kiss and pulled him down further by grabbing his tie and he smiled and got your hint and just as soon as things started to heat up . 

Klaus started to call Elijah’s name something about some kind of business they had to handle only god knows what they were up to. 

You Groaned and Elijah laughed simply pecking you on the lips and getting up and reaching you down and helping you up. 

You got up on your feet and wrapped your hands around his neck and kissed him again in a deep passionate one pushing your body into his and he returned just as passionate. 

He pulled away first and Kissed you on the top of your head and simply whispered later before leaving the room before Klaus decided to tear the whole house apart. 

You went back to your grimoires you had been looking at us before. There were so many spells and you head was spinning from all the reading you were doing. 

There was one in particular that caught your eye, it was a little bit older one and it was big with a lot of ingredients. It required some of Elijah’s blood mixed with yours and a bunch of other witchy items you knew you could easily get to. 

Most of it was nature stuff like herbs but there was one that would be a little harder to find it was a plant that was your older than your husband. It was supposed to help with fertility and according to legend and the multiple spells you just glued together it should work. 

You decided to get up and head to the witches quarters and get the stuff you needed besides the flower you know you had to ask one of the originals about it and then that would come with about 100000 questions you rather not share until you knew it was sure it would work. 

Once down at the market the witches down there making it harder than needed to be all because they knew you were basically married to the original. You just decided to ignore and gather the materials you needed and head back to the compound. 

Once inside it was easy to sneak inside and shut the door behind you. You carefully laid down the ingredients and began to work. You knew Elijah would be home soon and wanted to work rather quickly to have it done by the time he got home. 

Once you put everything and worked your magic and creating the right spell by combining everything together and twisting some stuff around. After everything was all said and done it came a weird looking green liquid. You and Elijah had to drink it and that was the worry some part. 

He would ask about a million questions as to what it was and you yourself wasn’t sure what it would do to you once it had been consumed. I mean maybe you could just lie to him and say it was just a witch experiment you had been working on. He was rather supportive you and your magic. 

You had looked up after cleaning up the mess and Elijah was there leaning on the door and his hands in pockets smiling down at you.

“Would you like some help cleaning up whatever this is” He said moving his hands gesturing motion to the stuff around room”

“Nope just a smell i have been working on and the mess besides these few books is all cleaned don’t be so dramatic Elijah.”

You said getting up and putting the books on the shelf with the rest of them. He then walked over to you and put his hands on your waist and pulling you into him. He then started to kiss up and down your neck smirking all along the way.

“Well now that mess of yours is handled and Niklaus is occupied for the moment how about we finish what we started earlier.”

“And what might that be” You said turning around and kissing him hard and forceful which he had no problem returning. 

Before it got even further you decided now was a good time as any to try out the spell. You pulled away rather fast and Elijah gave you a weird look on his face.

“That spell I was working on the juice i need us to drink it before we get any further i just need both of us to drink it. Before you ask just trust me i can’t tell you until i know after a 1000% it worked.”

He went over and drank some without giving even a second guess you walked over and did the same thing as well. 

“Thank you for trusting me you whispered over to him.” 

“I’ll always trust you.” He said back before leaning down and kissing you deeply and pushing you on the bed.

 He positioned himself on the bed as to where you were on your back and he was laying on top. He started slowly leaving a trail of open mouth kisses on your neck. And you both rather quickly started undressing each other. 

After everything was all said and finished Elijah made the two of you switch positions and he was laying down on his back and you were laying your head on his chest and he was playing with your hair a weakness of yours. It was quiet in the house and you close your eyes drifting off into a peaceful sleep. 

3 months Later

You weren't feeling up to par. You were sick in the morning and overall you just tired and worn down. A part of you knew something was different but you didn’t want to jinx it.

 You knew it had been a couple months passed. You decided to take a deep breath and walk down the local drugstore and grabbed a couple of pregnancy tests. 

The whole time you had nothing but nerves and butterflies once home you rushed to the bathroom and took the test.  It was the longest 3 minutes your life. But before you knew it the buzzer went off.  

You looked down with a shaky breath and saw all the test said the same thing positive you made a weir vcd noise that sounded like a cry and a scream and Rebecca came running into the bathroom.

“What the bloody hell are you alright love ?” 

Rebecca looked at you and your shocked expression and then down at the multiple test on the sink. 

Her face looked mad and confused and a bunch of different emotions on her face and before she got a chance to say anything you cut her off. 

“Yes it is Elijah’s and no he doesn’t know I was trying and it was a spell I used to help make this happen and yes i’m sure it’s his he’s the only guy i’ve been with in the past 30 years.” 

You smiled at the blonde and let her take on for a second before she vamped sped over you and smiled and hugged you and then took a step back. You could tell on her face she was listening to something.

“I can hear a heartbeat it’s so little but it’s there.” She smiled

“I can’t believe this is happening we both waited so long for this moment.”

You and Rebecca were so caught up in the moment you didn’t even hear Elijah walked in 

Rebecca hurried up and hide the test before he could see. 

“Well what is going on here?”

“Nothing just girl stuff no need to be nosy.” Rebecca said she also grabbed the test before heading out. 

You walked over and kissed Elijah and kissed him softly before leaving to find Rebecca before running off and finding ways to best tell the new dad about the joyful news.

[sincereiyleah]

Is This Seat Taken?

A/N: Because the scenario kept bugging me, thanks to @/millennial-mess (sorry! I don’t know if they want to be tagged or not!) I decided to write a little ficlet about Carisi not being able to sit in Barba’s seat at the bar. I decided against posting it up on my ao3 account because it’s really short, but I’m trying to promise myself to post something up there regarding barisi before Friday comes. Anyways, enjoy! 

Warnings: Rated Teen audience and up, nothing too disheartening. 

When Carisi hears a sudden and confident click of high heels walking towards him, his pen momentarily stops, however, he’s able to complete his thought by the time the footsteps stop and the body is right next to him. A familiar smell of perfume bombards his nose and Carisi smiles, without taking his eyes off his legal pad he asks, “Would it be redundant to ask how you found me, Captain?”

The new title falling off his tongue as easily as his own, Carisi was surprised how natural the switch from Lieutenant to Captain was for him, just how he was surprised about his own switch from Detective to A.D.A.

There’s a bemused chuckle, the Captain sits next to him and Carisi finally places his pen down and shifts towards the one and only, Olivia Benson.

“Spare me,” she says, her eyes filled with playfulness and Carisi is instantly enthralled with her light humor. However, the moment is gone and the ever-observant detective leaned her head to the side, her eyes darting towards an item in the low lit bar. “You’re not in his seat.”

In hindsight, Carisi should have seen this coming, she was a trained detective of more than twenty years, but still, Liv said it in such a motherly type of way; hidden with undertones.

“Yeah, no, no I’m not,” Carisi manages to stumble out, he glances over at the empty seat and a legal pad like his own appears with a man hunched over it, scribbling quickly as the two fingers of scotch he was working on finally drained dry.

The vision disappeared.

The Captain only hummed, perhaps she was expecting him to elaborate on his conscience thought of sitting beside a particular former A.D.A’s seat but Carisi doesn’t have the answer himself.

“It’ll get tough,” she said instead, Carisi’s eyes drift back over to her, she has that docile kind of smile, kind but sad, knowing something that others don’t.

“I know, Liv,” although practiced, Carisi is still new to this job, it isn’t like the transitioning to a detective, he had his experience from uni days, he had something to lean back to and familiarize himself with. This A.D.A business, this territory, it feels foreign and aches of familiarity and all he has to lean back to are his memories of a certain A.D.A who reluctantly showed him the ropes. That and Carmen, who Carisi was lucky to have. “I may have changed jobs, but it isn’t easier by a long shot,” his hands deftly go and grab a beer that’s been idling beside his paperwork and drinks, the cool liquid turning lukewarm in his mouth.

“Well if there is anyone who can overcome it is you, Carisi,” that smile with only fondness returns, “I can still remember where you went around the precinct sputtering your legalities to anyone who would listen.”

They share a laugh, his earlier days where he wasn’t as bright but he had the spirit, that’s what brought him here, his will.

“I’m proud of where I am, but I can’t help but feel like I’m trespassing on familiar grounds,” the smile that Carisi sports fall flat and when he looks back over to the empty seat filling the empty air with only a reappearance of a two-finger scotch and a brief flash of green, he bites his lower lip and picks up his pen again. “I want to build, but I don’t think I can tear down what’s already there.”

“Then don’t,” was her simplistic reply but Carisi should know Liv is everything but simple. Nonetheless, she pushes herself up from the seat and regards him once more, “I have to get back home to Noah,” she explains.

“Of course, thanks for the chat, Captain,” Carisi forces his eyes onto hers, those brown eyes always contemplating.

A hand is placed on his shoulder, “Give him a call, Carisi, I’m positive he’s thrilled.”

And she leaves. Carisi watches her go with the comment playing on a loop in his head, he knows the ghost that haunts this job for him, but he’s unwilling to say his name in fears that he will reappear.

-

It’s been six months since he became the new A.D.A and the job had become more ingrained into Carisi, it’s been smooth so far, but Carisi is wary because in this business smooth can end quickly.

Carisi is also surprised at how many late nights he spends at the low lit bar now, always sitting next to the empty chair which always seems to remain empty during his stay.

But it’s been two months and Carisi still hasn’t called like Liv suggested, Carisi mainly doesn’t know what to say and everything he wants to say he can’t. So he ignores the lingering ghost the best he can.

The case the squad caught isn’t a particularly rough one, Carisi just has to be cautious of a loophole the defense may exploit and so far he’s had a winning streak and he doesn’t want to mar it. Therefore, when a pair of footsteps, confident in its strides, makes its way towards the empty seat, Carisi fails to notice.

The detective that’s still in him dies a little at his carelessness.

But it isn’t until he feels the warmth of another body coming in close contact with him does Carisi’s pen stop. His eyes don’t leave his legal pad, mostly out of fear, but in his peripherals, he could see the bartender serve a drink to the new companion almost as in rote.

“Should I ask?” Carisi finally says, blue eyes unwilling to turn.

“Carmen still has her loyalties, remember to give her a raise.”

Carisi doesn’t know if he wants to laugh or cry, the voice, he hasn’t heard in almost two years fills his ears and all the memories he had in his arsenal to lean against when a case gets tough all merged together.

“Duly noted. Two years without a peep from you, I’m surprised to see your brief return,” it’s a bit more bitter than Carisi had wanted.

“I’m sorry,” Carisi blinks and his head finally lifts up and turns, that empty seat filling the empty air is not so empty anymore.

Rafael Barba sits there, scotch already in hands and from the looks of it, has been staring at Carisi since he got there.

“You were one of the people who should have known of my departure,” Rafael says, the rim of his glass holding his green eyes’ interest until they finally snap up and lock with Carisi’s blues, “personally.”

Carisi sighs, “I could have called- I wanted to but...,” his voice falls flat and he breaks the stare. “I guess I hadn’t forgiven you yet.”

“I haven’t either. The way I left, with only saying goodbye to Liv, Rita, and Mami, I don’t expect to be welcomed so quickly,” there’s a sad tug of his lips, he has a pout and it’s adorable. Rafael’s eyes glance down at the legal pad and there’s a small smile that appears, “I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I missed your insistent questions, looks like you got it all figured out,” Rafael caught his eyes, “Counselor.”

The flush that imprisons Carisi’s cheeks is embarrassing and a sputtering laugh tries to cover it, “I didn’t think I’d live long enough to hear that.”

“It’s well deserved, Carisi.”

“Sonny,” he quickly corrects.

Rafael raises his eyebrow.

“We’re not colleagues anymore, we haven’t been in a long time,” the answer seems to suffice, “besides, I have you to thank, Rafael.”

“No you don’t,” was the quick and curt response, “only yourself. You became A.D.A by yourself, acknowledge that.”

Carisi is momentarily stunned, but he nods his head nevertheless, “I-uh,” and for lack of better communication on his end, “why are you here, Rafael?”

“I see you still have that detective inside you.”

“I don’t think he’s ever going to leave.”

“I didn’t say I wanted him to.”

“Stop deflecting.”

“Because,” Rafael blinks and takes another sip of his scotch, “someone I did consider a friend should know that even though I don’t deserve their forgiveness, I’m proud of what they have done with themselves,” Rafael's lips tug again and now it’s into a smile, genuine, “and who they turned out to be. There’s no one better for this job.”

“There was you.”

The words fall quick before Carisi can think about them. Rafael is silent for a moment.

“There was. Now it’s you.”

“Why are you here?”

“I just told-“

“No you didn’t, why are you here on a Friday night, close to twelve am, trying to make good with an old-time friend who stole your job?”

“You didn’t steal anything, Carisi-“

“Sonny.”

“You didn’t steal anything, I left on my own volition, I’m excited that you finally got the job.”

“Finally?”

“You were my first recommendation to the DA’s office, good to know they actually valued my opinion.”

Carisi shook his head, there were too many emotions in there creating a headache.

“Why are you here, Rafael?”

“To give you that personal talk I should have given you two years ago.”

“Why now?”

“I see that you’ve settled nicely into your lawyer status-“

“Rafael.”

“Florida’s men are crazy and the city called back to me, I only learned of your status two weeks ago.”

“Who told you?”

“The papers.”

Carisi throws an eyebrow up and his gaze sharpens.

“Manhattan A.D.A Dominick Carisi Jr. wins the trial against sex trafficker.”

Carisi rolls his eyes, it was his third big case since becoming SVU’s ADA and Carisi had worked his ass off to ensure life for that man.

“Liv didn’t tell you?”

“No. She didn’t. I asked and she said I should have called you if I wanted to know so bad.”

“Is there anything else you want to know?”

“Excuse me?”

“Anything else you want to know about me since you’ve been gone?”

It’s a brief silence.

“Yes. But not here.”

Carisi blinks and it takes a moment, but Rafael looks over to him, the two interlocking eyes.

“What are you saying, Counselor?”

“Something I should have said two years ago: can I buy you a drink, A.D.A Carisi?”

Carisi smiles, he closes his legal pad, “Yes you can.”

[homenum-revelio-hq]

Welcome to the Order of the Phoenix, Sebastian!

You have been accepted for the role of EDGAR BONES! We really enjoyed your application! We especially loved how clearly we could see your Edgar throughout. His personality was vibrant and real, as was the way he fit into his family structure. His family section was well-detailed and brilliant! We hope to get an Amelia soon to see their sibling relationship thrive! We are so excited to have you as part of this roleplay!

Please take a look at the new member checklist and send in your account within 24 hours! Thank you for joining the fight against Voldemort!

OUT OF CHARACTER:

NAME: Sebastian

AGE: 21

TIMEZONE: CEST

ACTIVITY LEVEL: I am in my last year at university, so I don’t have many classes to attend during the day. I do need some time to focus on my dissertation, though, and I do enjoy going out with my friends on weekends, but you should receive at least a couple of replies every three days.

ANYTHING ELSE: No triggers, no worries. I did have a few not so enjoyable experiences in roleplay groups recently. Especially in those I joined after they were already open for a while; the players had become very clique-y. I’m not someone who just drops out of a roleplay or looks to victimise myself, at all, but I do tend to feel uncomfortable easily when my ooc-messages or replies get repeatedly ignored. It’s an anxiety thing, I’m sure I’m not alone with this, but I thought to warn you, just in case you notice me go shy in the group chat or the like. :)

CHARACTER DETAILS:

NAME: Edgar Bones

AGE: 28

GENDER, PRONOUNS, and SEXUALITY: Cis male. He/Him. Bisexual.

About the latter he might actually be rather open. The knowledge that homosexuality occurs in many animal species was already found in the 70s. I can imagine that Edgar definitely did his research, found out about how his feelings were therefore very natural, and moved on. The same goes for gender. He might himself feel comfortable in presenting himself as cis male but he knows that gender is mostly a construct and nothing to get too hung up about. Though, even though he knows a lot about sexuality and the chemistry behind love, he’d never flaunt it anywhere, where it wouldn’t be safe or where too many people would be watching. He’s also never really been deeply in love. He’s a serial monogamist, because he does enjoy (or rather, crave) the company of other people, and he would never say those relationships were meaningless to him, but the truth is, he firmly believes that his twin is and will forever be his only soulmate. Romantically or not is not the point, but he knows that he’ll never connect more deeply with anyone than Amelia.

BLOOD STATUS: Halfblood

HOUSE ALUMNI: Ravenclaw

ANY CHANGES: I retract my FC changing request, haha. I realise I don’t care too much about the look of people, let alone fictional roleplay babies, to hassle you into making another graphic. And Lindsey Morgan is perfect as well, so there’s that. If, however, a future applicant for Amelia wishes to change her FC and they find a better fit for Edgar as well, I would be willing to talk about it! :) As long as they are not changed into white FCs.

CHARACTER BACKGROUND:

PERSONALITY:

When the house you stand in is more brightly illuminated than the outside world, you can’t see anything through the window. You must turn off the light behind you to see the world before you, even if that means that the world can’t see you back anymore.

Edgar is by nature an incredibly curious person. He gobbles up knowledge as though it’s milkless cereals, one after the other, in with it, chewing, chewing, chewing ceaselessly. What he really wants to do with that knowledge comes later.

Often he connects it. Finds two topics that seem oddly unrelated and finds the answer in one that the other had the question to. He likes seeing the small in the big, how every microcosm is reflected by the macrocosm, how there’s no singularity in the university, everyone carries the patterns of galaxies within themselves.

And he likes to philosophise about it, even if it leads to nothing or has no practical use. Getting him to talk is like opening a treasure box, the whole universe seems stores between his brows. At times he writes it out, mostly in epigrams, like the one up there, of which the title is his own name, but he doesn’t consider himself an artist. Art needs an audience to become art, and he doesn’t want one.

That’s why it’s not easy to catch him share his knowledge to its full extent. Only when he truly believes that you want to know more of what he has to say than vise versa, he will share, otherwise you’ll just be left puzzled as to what thought caused him to this sudden outburst of ideas, or this creative plan that seems to have come out of nowhere.

He’s laid-back and quiet, not because he doesn’t have anything to say (and sometimes well-kept thoughts do slip over his lips) but because he knows that it’s easier to observe if people don’t notice him. At times he can be quick-paced and full of energy, and it’s in those moments that you see how all his knowledge comes into play. But even then he doesn’t perform. He just does the thing for himself and lets you be around.

Although curiosity-driven and intelligent, he’s not cold-hearted or arrogant. At all. He’s a calm fellow, always ready to lend you an ear, and if you ask for it, perhaps even advice. He doesn’t care much for the sound of his own voice but he knows to raise it when it’s needed. His sense of justice is very much active, and so is his wish to treat people kindly. This too is caused by his holistic view of the world – to be smart also means to know how other people feel and how to explore your own freedom without endangering theirs. He is empathetic, even if he doesn’t (always) go out of his way to show it or put on a great act to prove it. Sometimes he does, though, when he notices the other person needing it, and those proofs of affection can be as colourful as unconventional as brief.

Most people might not see much in him at first, maybe even doubt how he stayed in the Order for so long, but that’s because unlike ex-Gryffindors and ex-Slytherins, he has no urge to brag about any of his assets. But if they sit down with him, really get to know him, bit by bit, they’ll discover the fabulous world of colours that all Bones store in their hearts.

The bio emphasises that after Hogwarts, he grew into disregarding rules. I think the reason why he didn’t use to do this is because rules serve a purpose, don’t they? They make sense, in at least one way or another. Don’t go to the Forbidden Forest. Why? Because it’s dangerous. But with the rise of discriminating laws, the discrepancy between what was ‘lawful’ and what was ‘right’ grew. And if it’s not right, Edgar won’t follow it. He still studies laws and learns them so well until he knows every possible loophole, but he doesn’t respect them blindly just because they’re laws.

This being said, those lines he always made himself stay in, they still exist. No, they no longer overlap with rules and the ministry’s laws, but his life is still full of them. It’s difficult to rid yourself of old habits, especially those that have served you so well for so many years, that became a part of you, that directed your every move and every thought for so long. Lines such as: No more than three coffees a day. No leisure time until you’ve responded to all your mail. No unprotected sex. But also lines such as: Check oven, lights and plugs at least twice before leaving your apartment. Always bring a pen. If you stay up after three am, it’s too late to go sleep. Those are the rules he doesn’t tell people about, only obeys in silence because they might be founded in logic, and yet feel oddly irrational… Perhaps because they’re not always there, because they fade when he’s got the company of someone he trusts, because they get much, much worse, the longer he goes without seeing Amalia.

BRIEF OVERVIEW OF FAMILY:

The Bones were a privileged family, wealthy and yet not dishonourable.

The Bones name was carried into the Wizarding world by a Muggle, back when most Wizarding names were still pure and unheard of by Muggles. Seraphina was a young witch, just out of Hogwarts, when she decided to marry Caspian Bones, her oldest childhood friend. She was beautiful, she could’ve had anyone, the richest, most prestigious pureblood families would’ve sent forth their sons, but Seraphina chose Caspian, the Muggle, the farmer’s son, the boy who had held her hand before they knew this was something improper, who had shown her how a simple life could be as happy as one decorated in silver, and taught her to tell her secrets to the bees, who had always helped her escape from her parents’ claws and society’s demands, so they could be free together, just for a while, just for a night. She was his long before he even knew, and she was certain, as she walked down the Muggle-styled wedding aisle, that she would not run, would not hide, but that she would fight to make the Wizarding world a more accepting place.

She fought so that her parents would even look Caspian in the eye, fought for her children to be accepted into Hogwarts (they were allowed in, of course, by the ancient laws of Hogwarts, but that doesn’t mean the school board didn’t frown upon those halfbloods), fought to prove their magic was no less powerful than a pureblood’s, fought, eventually, even in court, demanding for justice. And all the while she fought, she was loyal by Caspian’s side, who might not have understood much of all this, but he certainly supported her and never regretted his decision to marry her. And one important lesson he gave his children, and taught them to give it to their children one day as well: “Remember that the first obligation of those who are free, is to ensure other people’s freedom as well.”

For generations and generations, almost every Bones born was a Hufflepuff. And proudly so, too. To understand one’s highest value to be the protection of those in need, – the fight for justice – not because of the gold and admiration that comes for a fight won, but because it ensures a fair, equal world? How would that be something shameful?

The family therefore received a particular place in the eyes of the Wizarding World. On the one hand they well regarded, appreciated for their values, even if the means to get there always seemed rather strange and unexpected to most people, on the other hand, became a clear outsider to the society of purebloods and those halfbloods who still thought of themselves closer to the pure Wizarding world. The Bones neither cared for money other than spending it on charities, nor caring for their (or others) blood status. Every new Muggle was warmly welcomed as a true relative and carefully introduced to the Wizarding world. And even when Squibs were born, there was none of the ostracism like in pureblood families, or even like in some halfblood families. Their values were clearly defined, but incomprehensible to many, and the family gained a reputation that was more about the wild outbursts of ideals and unorthodox ways of fighting for them, then about the relatively steady values that drove those acts of bravery.

And so it came that those values were taught to every Bones child from a young age on. Manners, ethics, history, the art of conversation; long before they made it to Hogwarts they already spent their days in classrooms, studying how to respect and show respect to others, learning to put others before you, burning the Bones family values onto their hearts. But ‘Seraphina’ means little fire, and it is difficult to tell a firework which colours it has to burst into.

Edgar, Amelia, Dell and Colter were the well-beloved offspring of Laura and Jorge Bones (and indeed, Jorge took, after Laura’s eccentric demand to keep her name for the sake of its importance in the British Wizarding World, her name. He didn’t mind too much, proving himself to be quite the fit for the Bones family. Having travelled the world (though always staying in the magical realms) he was quite the peculiar case in his youth. Now that they’re older, both Laura and Jorge are way more focused on keeping the values of the Bones family alive, caring deeply about the well-being of everyone around them – even if perhaps still showing it in their surprising and unexpected ways).

Born in the old Bones Manor in which even Seraphina had already grown up, all four children were of magical capabilities and all four showed a good heart from a young age on. But like every Bones, they also showed an insatiable need to express themselves. To become their own person, to be more than just their family name. They were constantly driven by their curiosity, and at first it was as though both, Edgar and Amelia, were too driven by the discovery of themselves and the world to be true Hufflepuffs, showing more prominently traits belonging to Ravenclaw. Creativity and freedom of expression, that was what they were all about. But eventually Edgar seemingly took the back seat, letting his sister be the firework while he became the audience of her beauty. What not many people knew, perhaps no one, really, except for Amelia herself, was that while she ran off during lessons, dinners, and curfew, searching for all the possibilities this world held for her, he covered for her. Protecting her. Becoming the one who his parents considered reliable, so that they would charge him with duties and responsibilities so that she could be free.

This doesn’t mean he wasn’t the one to light her fuse at times, or that he disliked her games of fire, but that he loved her too much to see it dowsed. In all honesty, he could’ve watched her for hours, listened to her speak about what she had lived through out there, and never interrupt, never cease asking for more, softly, hoping to prompts paragraphs out of her with a single line of his.

It also doesn’t mean that he was any less creative. But he learned to express this creativity in the shadows, in silence, shielded from the watchful gaze of their parents and society. Books became his escape. While Amelia was out there in the real world, he plunged into the worlds authors had created, and eventually even dabbled in creating such worlds for himself on paper as well. He learnt about the universe from the realms of the library, at first focusing on the stories of the Wizarding World, but eventually, when all books seemed exhausted, moving on to the stories of the Muggle World. His eccentrism was quiet and only for himself, not meant to serve a greater purpose but to still his hunger for knowledge.

One could’ve said that his wish to protect the sister was indeed driven by loyalty, but really, it was admiration and the wish to see just what she was going to do next. And for that, he simply had to be the good son. Please his parents, please his teachers, please those who had so long shaken their heads at the iconoclastic family. And if he was being honest, he never felt half as restricted by it all as most people might’ve assumed. He liked learning about rules and seeing just how far you could go without overstepping them, without drawing attention to your ways. It was a game with no winners and no one to watch him, no one to admire just how well he played it. What did it matter that he was often overlooked, his parents’ eyes and attention always on his siblings, sometimes out of exasperation, sometimes out of pride, if he could be just who he wanted without anyone interfering or giving their two Knuts?

When he was sorted into Ravenclaw, after a long conversation with the Sorting Hat, though not as long as Amelia’s, he silently rejoiced. His family was a little baffled, especially his mother who had always been convinced he would be another one of those Bones who carried the family name with the selfless values on their sleeves, not caring that they wouldn’t shine half as brightly in the history books as their wild, untameable counterparts. You know, the kind of Bones who were good, but didn’t do much to express that goodness in the world, unlike all the others whose personality was like pots of colours splashed into every dusted-in tradition to make sure the world would be changed for the better. But Edgar liked it, he did. Up there, in the tower, he could look down to the world, breathe the cold air of his own, quiet, personal freedom and play with the lines of all those rules without anyone paying attention whatsoever. Up there, he wouldn’t have to mingle with all those people and their lack of answers, and disappear in his books and learn more about the worlds – plural – with no interference. Up there, the stars were close, and his ever-dreamy gaze went up, eventually beginning to even search for the knowledge that no books held ready for him.

OCCUPATION:

Journalist for the Daily Prophet.

No, he doesn’t agree with the opinions served by that paper, no, he doesn’t get paid nearly enough, no, he doesn’t really care. What matters to him are two things: 1) That he can decide on his work hours himself, allowing him free time for the Order without having to take holidays. 2) That he gets free theatre tickets. Besides, whenever he does show up in his office, even by merely writing and editing the arts section, he still hears of the latest news before they’re even printed…

ROLE WITHIN THE ORDER/THOUGHTS ABOUT THE ORDER:

I like to think that Edgar is somewhat of an important piece of the Order. He’s been there for a long time, so he doesn’t just know the rules and which of them are especially important to respect, but also the people. The people who are still with him, the people who aren’t. He remembers their victories and the mistakes that made them fall. And he’s not just plainly observant but actually knows what he’s looking out for. Weak links or strong assets hidden beneath inexperience. It worries him that the Order is no longer what it used to be, and he embraces the new recruits, even though wary of their means. Logically, he’s all for taking more aggressive measures now, but the fact that they have never tried to be as reckless and unforgiving as the Death Eaters, means they have no proof is can work. He just wishes they had more time to think it out, make sure there’s not another thing they can do first because going straight to terrorism.

Maybe this undecidedness and his tendency to act on his own behalf based on what he thinks is the best thing to do in that moment, makes some Order members wary of him. He understands that it’s difficult to 100%ly trust a pillar when it could leap away any moment, so he always tries to be as reliable as possible. What he is certain about, though, is the fact that he won’t quit. He firmly believes in the cause, and perhaps even that they might be the last chance to save the Wizarding World.

Also, I like to imagine that while to everyone else, it came quite as a surprise that Edgar joined the order back then, for him it’s doesn’t feel out of character at all. After all, he’s always been a Bones, and he’s always been a Bones in the shadows of everyone else. The Order couldn’t be more in the shadows if it tried, and this way of theirs to change the world without anyone knowing exactly who is doing it, feels quite like him. 

And yes, he would like for Amelia and perhaps even his brothers to join the Order too, because he knows their hearts are in the right place, and he knows they are incredible at practical magic, spells, defence, all that. But he’s gone all his life staying in the shade so they could be out there changing the world with their colours. The idea of them actually joining the Order scares him. What if they’re not meant for the shade, what if something happens to them? He’s protected them for years, and now he’s supposed to be the reason for putting them in danger? Or worse: for dowsing their fire?

SURVIVAL:

He’s mostly stayed in the same apartment for the last two years. Before that he lived with his girlfriend, and before that he was yet in another apartment by himself, and before that he lived with yet another girl, and so on. He doesn’t like to be alone, and he hates silence, so he always stayed near the city centre, always close to his friends at the Deli, the Pub, the locksmith, always ready to go out and either find out some information or lose someone who is following him. Though this didn’t happen too often. I like to think that Edgar is so inconspicuous (to people who don’t know him) that he was never on the ministry’s radar. Perhaps once or twice, in all those years, but he’s working for the daily prophet, and his boss bailed him out of trouble every time, confused why someone would suspect this random, mediocre, simple friend of the arts of something as impressive as being part of an underground organisation. On the other hand, I also believe that he is very talented when it comes to duelling. Though not the most powerful wizard ever when it comes to inner-magic-force, and certainly not the best student at Hogwarts, he is incredibly creative when it comes to using spells. That’s what makes him so talented as a wizard. There’s never a situation where he’s been too slow to get the Order out of troubles again, by thinking fast and by surprising his opponent. Unorthodox methods have proven themselves as the most sustainable, and he constantly works on new ways to surprise Death Eaters. Perhaps this is why he is intrigued and terrified of the younger recruits: because he has seen his plans work in the past, but now realises bigger, more up-front measures are needed. Bombs just seem so crude.

RELATIONSHIPS:

Albeit not a Hufflepuff (though he never corrects people when they assume it), Edgar does care about other people, and he is quite loyal. If a friendship breaks, then because there really was no other choice. And considering that most of Edgar’s true friendships are all people from the Order, this means they must’ve either betrayed the Order, or died. Sure, things aren’t easy in the face of war. There’s tension, and conversations slip too easily into heavy territories, but Edgar’s been in it for so long now… He barely remembers it any different.

OOC EXPLORATION:

SHIPS/ANTI-SHIPS:

Romantically? Nothing planned at all! I do enjoy the idea of exploring Edgar’s need to be around people, to live off their warmth while he sits in the dark, but who those people are entirely depends on the players and the characters’ chemistry.

WHAT PRIVILEGES AND BIASES DOES YOUR CHARACTER HAVE?

Edgar is walking right on the line.

The line between receiving prejudice and being with those who are prejudiced. He’s neither white, nor straight, nor pure-wizard, but he can pass as all those things if he absolutely has to. And that’s because at least one half of him is all this.

His mother (Laura Bones) is a white halfblood from upper class Britain, whose family has, despite their appreciation and respect of old Wizarding traditions, always welcomed people of all blood into their midst and was famous for breaking the rules of typical pureblood behaviour, always doing what they think is the right thing to do, no matter the means or noise it would cause. His father (Jorge Bones, né Centello) is from South America, where the Wizarding Community is more closed-in on itself, so even though he is a pureblood and knows fairly little about the Muggle world, he doesn’t carry the arrogance and prestige to his (maiden???)name as British pureblood families do.

Edgar has got enough knowledge from both worlds to let himself fall on either side of the line when he has to. Talk with colleagues at the Daily Prophet about inherent wizarding affairs. Speak in perfect English to receive better credit on his Muggle apartment insurance. Talk about the beautiful curves of a woman’s body with his friend’s brother. Easy.

If he were to converse deeply with someone from either side, though, it would become obvious that he is mostly playing pretend. Of course he has a vast theoretical knowledge on the worlds, and even chose to live in a Muggle apartment close to an entrance to Wizarding London, but the truth is, his practical knowledge lacks terribly. Certainly, he knows how to buy underground tickets, has ridden cabs before, and since recently he even owns a microwave! But the fact that he has always learnt about the worlds from books, from his safe spot in the shade, it did rob him of the practical experiences. So it’s not at all a bias or prejudice he has against Muggles or Muggleborns, but a vivid curiosity the way a zoo-goer would feel about the animals. He has read every book on lions, yes, but if he were faced with one, it wouldn’t be granted that he knew what to do. Pretend, of course, copy what the instructions in the books said, no eye contact, no quick motions, and definitely no running away!, but it forever remains pretend, not intuition.

And this goes for both sides of this line of his. Conversing in English, he always has Spanish sayings coming to mind. Dressing in Wizarding fashion, he always longs for the more comfortable Muggle trousers. He moves in both worlds, easily, with no one paying too much attention whether his ways are intuitive or adopted, but it does make him wonder, sometimes, on which side of the line he really belongs.

WHAT ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO?

I particularly like that the RP is neither 100% canon nor 100% AU. The fact that it bases itself on the canon years during Hogwarts gives it a great base to work with, but the fact that the rest is up to us, frees me from the stress of finding a way to go a certain direction.

I also really liked the bios. All of them felt very interconnected, as though the plot in the future will always inherently be influenced by the plots of the past. It makes me hope that my Edgar will serve at least in some other character’s development and I won’t have to feel too useless haha

What I’m most excited about is rewriting those famous character’s history and seeing just how much we can, perhaps, influence the plot drops and story.

Less important, but very honest, I’m also excited about Edgar. I don’t think I had a character like him yet, and I’ve been roleplaying for many years. I like to imagine him very studious, serene, reliable, but then with bursts of creativity and colour allowing for fun adventures.

PLOT DROP IDEAS:

- Concerning only Edgar and whoever wishes to participate: As previously stated, I’d love to explore Edgar’s need to be around people, and how he can become very dependent on others (even if he seems so detached and easy-going when one first meets him). I’d also like the very briefly mentioned nuances of OCD to be addressed, though I don’t plan on making this a very noticeable trait of him. People not close to him will definitely never know. - Concerning other characters not mentioned in the bio (and these are only ideas, they will not happen if the player doesn’t consent): Alice Longbottom: In her bio it says Caradoc Dearborn is the only one who makes her trust and stay with the cause. Considering how Caradoc and Edgar are friends, I’d like to explore what could’ve happened between Alice and Edgar. Certainly his spontaneity could’ve gotten her in trouble at least once – Perhaps it will again? Benjy Fenwick: Seems to distrust Caradoc – and also just generally a bit too … follower-ish for Edgar’s taste. Of course he’ll be civil and try to get to know him better, but for now he doubts that the Order is the right thing for him. One needs brains, hearts and willpower to fight in this war. A plot idea here could be Edgar forcing lots of ways to get to know Benjy, but also, if he does prove himself worthy of the Order, to take him under his wing.

ANYTHING ELSE?

I think on the Enneagram, Edgar is a 5. It makes sense for his wings to be a 4 (driven by the poetry of life) when he’s at his best and happy, and a six (craving guidance and becoming quite over-protective) at his worst. Heh.

Also I hope it came across clearly that the eccentric way of the Bones family are especially eccentric through the eyes of those who stick to traditions too furiously. Those who are also open-minded might smirk a bit about their “weirdness” but not in a dismissing way. They’re not ridiculed or complete outsiders. Sure, they have quite the wild means to express their values, but the values in themselves are good-hearted (Bones supposedly coming from the French word ‘good’, right?) and not at all far-fetched or ridiculous as a Lestrange or Black might believe it. If anything, their colours are akin to the colours of the students in 1968. Sure it might look crazy from the outside, but it’s not necessarily random, or coming from a place of pure mania. If the hippies wore loose clothes, their hair long, and ‘ethno’-patterns, then because it was comfortable, an expression of freedom and a love for the whole world. Not just because they thought it would make them look iconic. And the same goes for the Bones. As Amelia’s bio says, sure, she’s curious but it’s not an empty curiosity. It’s driven by /something/. And this something, in the Bones family in general, means to leave a mark on the world not because it’s pretty, but because of what it could mean to future generations.

[nezzfiction]

ENMY Chapter 88 - Operation Gun Dog

Chapter Synopsis: The Kingdom of Vacuo is about to enter its most daunting challenge, since the Third Crusade. Salem has personally come to see the end of some of Remnant’s greatest warriors, including Team ENMY. Assistance from Atlas is on its way, but will the Fleet arrive in time to make a difference?

Only one thing is certain. Whatever happens in Vacuo will echo the things to come for the rest of Remnant.

Series Synopsis: Team RWBY is disbanded, and Yang must find herself new allies. For her, that might very well be yesterday’s enemies. Joining up with the likes of Emerald, Mercury, and Neo, the four will comprise Team Enemy(ENMY).

Links to read the series: Ao3 or FF.net

Or hit the jump below

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Narrated by Yang

Previously on ENMY…

After watching from the sidelines long enough, Salem decides to bring the fight to Vacuo personally.

One of the dirtier plays she makes against the Kingdom, is sending a parasitic-type of shapeshifting Grimm into the city called Cuckoos.

While the Kingdom has its hands full with dealing with the infestation problem, Salem builds her army and chips away at the Kingdom’s forces.

With an alliance formed between Vacuo and Atlas, an Atlesian Fleet is enroute to provide Vacuo with aid.

The problem is whether it will get here in time, or be enough to make a difference.

This leads Weiss and Cinder to asking Qrow for help, or more importantly, the immortal called Titan.

Meanwhile, Temujin comes up with a brilliant idea to exterminate the Cuckoos once and for all, and get this war with Salem back on track.

To do that, her Khans give Team ENMY the training session of a lifetime.

Whether we’re actually ready or not, we’ll find out soon enough.

It’s time for the war between Vacuo and Salem to continue…

As Team ENMY takes part in Operation Gun Dog!

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Operation Gun Dog

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Gun Dog: n.- types of hunting dogs trained and developed to assist hunters in finding and retrieving wild game, usually birds.

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The sun was a couple hours from cresting the horizon, yet shades of purple were already trailing into the dark canvas above. The morning would arrive early—immeasurably so.

As if Remnant itself knew the day would be a long one, a pivotal moment that would determine the world’s very Destiny.

…

On the eastern shores of Vacuo, Temujin pensively overlooked her brother’s grave. A stone polished endlessly by seawater. A white tooth which sprouted from the sands of Vacuo’s beach.

“I wonder what words you would have for me now, brother? How disappointed I’m sure you would be.”

The old woman felt a sharp wind blow sand into the cracks of her face.

“I knew my ways wouldn’t last forever. Our people are learning that, too. It won’t always be the strongest who survive Vacuo. Which only begs the question, who will? Will anyone?” she sighed. “Whatever the answer, I’m no longer fit to see it.”

The constant sounds of waves breaking on the shore soothed the jagged corners of her heart, if only a little.

“Then again, what is the thing called, strength?” Temujin scratched one of her frayed ears. “Peh! What’s the point in getting philosophical now? Why did I even bother coming here? It’s not like I’m asking your permission!”

The old woman turned, and began the trek back to the city.

“Hmph. To make sure my people live to see a world better than the one I forged—”

“What is one more sin, anyway?”

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X  X X  X  X

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At the mouth of a cave, staring through the waterfall, Inna Kao looked to the horizon.

In her hand, was a steel chain with three dog tags hanging from it. She shifted through each one, like a pious one did their prayer beads. The names of her late teammates cycled her fingers and formed silently on her lips.

“Ferret.”

“Remington.”

“Earp.”

Their deaths were anything but remarkable. They were three among the countless who lost their lives in this War. As a soldier, Inna knew it was only the way of things. It was inevitability, it was their occupation.

“Ferret. Remington. Earp.”

But it didn’t stop her from wanting to give them meaning. To give reason to their sacrifices. Out of the members of FIRE Team, Inna was its only survivor. She decided it was on her to accomplish what her teammates could no longer not.

And if the war’s end was brought sooner with Vacuo’s destruction…

“For the fallen…” she whispered.

Inna snapped her rifle to her shoulder, and aimed Raven down her sights.

“Good reaction,” the woman greeted coolly.

“Mornin’. Done conferrin’ with the enemy?”

“You do know the enemy is a matter of perspective? Unless, we’re talking about Team ENMY, in which case, it is their namesake.”

“…”

*Sigh*

Raven rounded her way to the other side of the cave’s mouth, and sat across from Inna.

“You and Bean are too smart not to see what’s waiting at the end of this.”

“I see Vacuo fallin’, and Atlas next.”

“So, you haven’t had a change of mind after meeting the illustrious puppeteer behind it all?”

“Salem gives me the creeps, that’s for damn sure. But she won’t be the end of the world. If anyone will, it’s gonna be Bean, and I won’t let him go that far.”

“If you only knew,” Raven sighed again.

“I’m sorry we’re comin’ after Yang, if it makes any difference. Condolences and what not.”

“Inna, you’re the one I’m going to feel sorry for, if you two actually meet.”

“That right?” Inna set her rifle to the side. “So, what are ya goin’ be doin’ when the battle finally breaks out? You can’t fight your home, but you can’t fight Salem neither.”

“I guess, all I can really do is sit back and watch.”

“Even if I take my shot at Temujin, too?”

“No direct interference with the Witch. Those are the rules.”

Inna couldn’t help but turn a skeptic look at that, but the woman only remained passive.

“I heard from Adam back in Mistral, you tried to kill Yang and her team.”

“Different circumstances.”

“And you tried again in Atlas.”

“Again, different circumstances.”

“…”

“The wording’s very strict on my contract. Me not being forced to fight Vacuo is one of them.”

“Team ENMY isn’t from Vacuo.”

“The moment Temujin put them under her protection, they were under Vacuo’s protection. To be honest, I didn’t know that loophole existed either.”

Inna breathed a small chuckle, then her demeanor hardened.

“But if Vacuo falls…”

“If that were to somehow happen, I’m sure Yang’s strong enough now she won’t be killed so easily by me.”

“You give a whole new meaning to the term ‘tiger mom’, you know that?”

“So, I’ve been told.”

Raven got up, and began moving into the cave. She stopped to glance back.

“I’ve had my share of fighting the wrong battles for the right reasons, Inna. I fought my own team, whole Kingdoms, practically made enemies of all the wrong people. And I lost a lot of good friends along the way.”

“…So?”

Raven’s expression became conflicted.

“You have an obligation to let them go, Inna. Trying to make a world that should have been with them in it isn’t an honor—it’s an insult. Don’t shame them by trying to make them stay. Death is a part of who they are now, and you can’t change the memory of your teammates. Took a long time for me to learn that.”

“……Does that preachy horseshit work on everyone, or am I the sole exception?

“No, it never works. But I tried.” Raven showed a sympathetic smile of sadness. “Maybe, I just like acting out a history that keeps repeating itself.”

“…”

“My Mentor once said the same thing to my team. I think my brother and I ended up more or less like him, if not worse. The question is, do you really wanna end up like me? Do you want that for Bean?”

“…”

“That’s a question you ask yourself. Or maybe, some things you can’t learn until it’s too late… Or maybe, you think about it.”

The woman turned to walk away, and Inna heard one more sentence echo back to her.

“For the fallen.”

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X  X X  X  X

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“Will this work?”

“If they fail, we have our options.”

“Yes, but will it work?” Weiss repeated her question.

“It depends greatly on Salem’s ability to read our intent,” answered Cinder.

“Yes, but—”

“You know, there is a reason we agreed that I be director of all affairs military.”

Weiss pouted at that.

Within Atlas HQ, the two queens and their Board of Directors watched a projection of Vacuo’s capital. The room had gotten fairly used to the debates between regents, to an extent they no longer paid it any mind when they bantered playfully, at least from Cinder’s side.

“Leave the chess game to me, my Queen,” the Black Queen smiled. “We have controlled what variables we can, stacked whatever odds in our favor as we could, prepared as many surprises as possible, and devised several failsafes should our initial plans fall through.” Cinder continued to read the projected layout of the land. “If there is a weakness to be found in our opponent, I will exploit it.”

“I suppose that is what you’re good at,” Weiss huffed. “Do you still need me here, when you have your generals?”

“Oh, don’t be like that. You offer an insight I could never hope to gain.”

“I vaguely remember you calling it naivety and optimism, right before choosing to ignore them.”

“And I would rather hear them, than not.”

“You’re insufferable,” Weiss crossed her arms.

“Yes, and I enjoy your company, as well. Now, I believe Team ENMY is about to begin the Operation.”

As all eyes turned to the floating hologram, Weiss sulked deep into her chair. Her worries continued to pile until they were mountains. She couldn’t help thinking there was something else they could have done—something they could still do.

…As it stands now, I can’t see Vacuo winning this, she thought.

Cinder knows this, too.

She’s looking for a mistake by Salem, but will the Witch really make one?

Weiss turned to her fellow regent, and saw Cinder with her usual confidence. But she knew deep down, the Black Queen held her doubts.

“Nothing is more troublesome than an opponent with a good sense for preparation,” she remembered Cinder telling her before. It was also one of the reasons, the Black Queen liked to keep her around—as she remarked right afterward.

“Nor, is there a more troubling opponent with good intuition.”

Weiss scoffed to herself.

Preparation vs. Intuition.

I wonder if that’s all it comes down to.

The cold math.

Weiss thought there should be another way. A method which varied from Temujin’s, Cinder’s, and the Witch’s. Some other element they could exploit, because as it stood now...

Even I can tell, the way this is playing out—if we go purely by numbers and strategy…

The White Queen shook her head vehemently.

I can’t think that way.

There has to be something we can do for Vacuo.

But any more dedication of our resources, and we practically forfeit crucial defenses for Atlas.

What more can we commit to this battle?

What can I commit?

…

I can’t help remembering, it’s because I fought that way, I lost to Cinder in the first place.

Weiss set her sights to the projection and the countdown on the corner of the map. It read ten minutes.

Is this all?

What we can sacrifice and what we can gain?

What moves are more effective?

How far we can predict our opponent’s moves?

…

Weiss stared at a certain holographic marking one of the four units with a [Y].

What would Yang say, I wonder?

.

X  X X  X  X

.

Yang sneezed loudly, before wiping her nose. A moment later, their radios gave a soft crackle.

“Did I hear some nerd just short out her comms?”

“It’s called a sneeze, Em.”

“Someone was probably talking shit about you.”

“I wonder who.”

“Just sayin’… it was Ilia.”

“Wouldn’t put it past her.”

“I can hear you, you know?” Ilia’s voice resounded testily.

“Oh, don’t get your pony tail in more of a twist,” Emerald snickered. “Ready comms check. Gun Dogs Four, maintaining bored status.”

…

“Gun Dogs Three, ready,” Nai clicked in.

“Gun Dogs Two are ready and standing by,” Minerva answered.

“Gun Dogs One, geared and evil,” Yang checked in for her team.

They were positioned dead center of the city in the Hanging Gardens. The zone they were assigned was the most populated.

With her, were Neo and Mercury. Biding their time on the top balcony of the palace, her teammates double-checked their equipment.

“Think they’ll hold up?” Mercury tapped his steel toe against the floor.

“I doubt Masa could’ve done it any better, Merc,” Yang replied.

After having both their prosthetics broken, the two had to rebuild them from scratch. It was odd not having their reliable weapons tech in Masa Moon with them, but they knew their designs by heart. It was only a matter of trust at this point. And although Yang had entrusted him with far more, Mercury still found himself with the question.

“Hey.”

“What’s up?”

Mercury took a short breath, before speaking again.

“What would you think about me opening a weapons shop?”

“What, like here in Vacuo?”

“Doesn’t have to be here. Anywhere, really.”

“Sure. Why not?”

Mercury stared at her without another word. Only then, did Yang straighten with more attention.

“Merc?”

It wasn’t hard to read him now. He was trying to hide it, but he was obviously being sheepish.

“Oh,” Yang blinked a few times. “You mean…… quit Team ENMY and start a shop full-time.”

“When everything is over, I mean. It’s just a thought, but yeah.”

“You mean…When we beat Salem, end the War, and somehow stop Remnant from destroying itself, even when it’s already halfway there?”

“Yeah.”

“…” Yang cocked her brow. “You really believe that, don’t you? That we’re somehow going to win this.”

“What, you don’t?”

“I do, I just… never heard it out loud, or I thought I was the only one.”

Yang felt a sudden jab in her ribs by Neo beside her.

“Okay, okay. WE thought we were the only ones. But back to what you were saying…”

“Yeah, I- I don’t know. It’s just an idea that’s been bugging me lately. Reading my dad’s diary, killing Jupiter, meeting Temujin, working with Brig, and the other stuff. It just got me thinking.”

“That’s new-puh!” Yang felt Neo jab her again. “Sorry, Emerald’s influence. Go on, buddy.”

“All my life, I’ve been raised to be an assassin. When Cinder picked me up, it was pretty much the same. And then, there was this team. Don’t get me wrong, running with this crew… not as bad as I thought it was going to be. But working here, in Vacuo? I just kinda…”

Neo rounded her way, and hopped up to hug Mercury from behind. The expression was as transparent as the girl herself. Her gloved hand went to petting his head, like cooing a child. An encouraging smile beaming on her face.

“You heard the wife,” Yang nodded. “Me and Neo will support you in whatever you wanna do, any way we can.”

Mercury fought down the brimming emotion, and forced himself to turn to the scenery. A hand went to hold Neo’s, while a stuttered breath escaped him.

“Thanks, Neo, Yang. Means a lot.”

“Of course. Hey, I might even join you.”

“Seriously?” he asked in surprise.

“After some adventuring, though. I still want to live the life of a Huntress, but maybe after that.”

“You could sponsor me and have your name on the door. Mercury & Yang’s Workshop: Best Weapons Forged Under the Sun. It’s not a bad ring.”

Neo started pointing to herself eagerly. Shining expectation lit her grin.

“You could…be our billboard girl?” Mercury replied uncertainly.

“Our mascot,” Yang added.

Neo put Mercury into a headlock while puffing her cheeks.

Yang chuckled. “I don’t know about sponsoring, though. Me and Neo might be flat broke Huntresses. If you’re looking for sponsors, why not ask Em?”

It was then, she paused.

“Have you told Em, yet?”

“I…” Mercury sighed. “I don’t know what to tell her. I mean, we’re partners. She probably expects me to join her and Cinder in Atlas. Part of me thinks that’s what I should be doing. I mean, this weapons shop thing is just a dumb idea I came up with and—”

Yang and Neo jabbed him on each side.

““It’s not dumb!”” the two communicated. Then, Yang clapped his shoulder.

“I bet you anything, Em’ll support you even more than us. She’ll get it.”

“We are talking about the same person, right?”

“Aren’t we?”

“……Maybe, I’ll put the word with her and Cinder after this Vacuo deal is done.”

“Sounds good.”

The three took a moment to silently watched the morning sun rise.

“You know,” Yang started. “It’s bad luck to talk about stuff like this right before a life-threatening job.”

“Yeah, but we’re Team ENMY,” Mercury smirked back.

“Our luck’s always been shit.”

.

X  X X  X  X

.

“Our luck’s always been shit,” Emerald heard the sentence, as well as the matter her partner discussed beforehand.

Idiot.

Why would you think I wouldn’t understand?

And why’d you go to Neo and Yang first?!

“Ugh! Whatever!” Emerald grunted aloud, and kicked the copilot’s console.

“Hey! Easy on the merchandise!” Ilia complained beside her. “If you heard something you didn’t like, maybe you shouldn’t be using your Semblance to peep on other people’s conversations.”

“Just a little warm up, ponytail. Get the mind juices flowing before I run the biggest brain acrobatic routine of my life.”

In an airship circling the capital, Ilia and Emerald continued to chat.

“Are you sure you’re up for this?” the chameleon Faunus asked.

“Not like your boss gave me much of a choice.”

“Either we will become nourishment for the fire, or the fire will nourish us,” Temujin lectured over the radio. “Life is nothing but an endless cycle of tests and trials.”

“And I thought I was the only mind-reader here,” Emerald replied.

“Well, I thought it was about time Ilia voiced her doubts about your abilities.”

“You could make that guess every two seconds to be fair. Flygirl here, has no faith whatsoever—and no problems showing it either.”

“Only because so much depends on your team,” Ilia growled. “Especially you. If you mess up your part even a little, our people are the ones that pay for it.”

“We’re only disarming a thousand ticking time bombs, surrounded by innocent people, across one of the largest cities in Remnant, in the span of half an hour. You should relax, you’ll live longer.”

“…”

Emerald sported a sarcastic grin.

“Alright, ladies and gentle-powerbottoms. It’s Hurt Locker time. I’m putting the sheep under.”

The girl stood from her chair, and made her way to the back of the cockpit. There, four Godmother devices were hooked up to a metallic helmet, which Emerald fit snuggly onto her head.

“Clear your mind,” Minerva advised over the comms. “Remember, there are no limits to what the mind can do.”

“I know, I know. There is no spoon,” Emerald breathed deeply through her nose. “Just brain-tapping a whole Kingdom. Not like you guys are asking me to perform a miracle or anything.”

It was dawn, and the teams could see the citizens of Vacuo already waking. Many of which, were flooding the streets, busy with their daily commutes.

Emerald could sense their minds, some still vulnerable to sleep and dream. It was the best time for her Enchantress’ Semblance.

She closed her eyes, and the Godmothers hummed with life. Her fingertips pressed the sides of her helmet in concentration. The devices amplified her abilities, as the focus of her thoughts extended in every direction.

Once Emerald finished linking each mind to her mental network, a single word echoed the thoughts of Vacuo’s people.

(((♪Dream♪)))

.

X  X X  X  X

.

As soon as Emerald voiced the mental chant, various bodies across the city collapsed where they stood. Everyone that fell under the girl’s Semblance was trapped in a dream of her crafting.

Meanwhile, the only ones still awake and unaffected by Emerald’s Semblance could only be the teams—and the Grimm.

On the outer crust of the city, the team assigned Gun Dogs Three, dashed through their designated area. The walls faced the most thorough inspections for Cuckoos, but there were still a few that made it through screening. And it was on Nai, Mouse, and Knives to eliminate them all.

The silver irises of the siblings glistened with a sharp light. They tracked their targets with their exceptional vision, and marked them for execution.

“Nai, the man at 2 o’clock,” Knives called.

Even without hearing the end of her sentence, the large warrior bolted in the direction of her sight. There, a lone man carried on with his inspection of a damaged truck, oblivious to the events unfolding outside his peripheries.

Nai braced his fist in his other hand, and drove his elbow through the man’s skull. A large splatter of blood erupted from the other side. There was a glimmer of doubt, before the person’s shape distorted into its original, grotesque bird form.

Before Knives called out the next target, Mouse spotted another Cuckoo, and drove his straight-edged dagger into its solar plexus.

The three continued to zip through the routes planned beforehand. Some of the Cuckoos were discovered and mapped prior to the operation. Some were not.

Regardless, they carried out their grim task with cold execution. Any person found moving was eliminated without second thought. If they hesitated, the Cuckoo might become aware and potentially kill anyone in their surroundings. Fortunately for the trio, most of their prey would be isolated.

The same could not be said for the team assigned Gun Dogs Two.

…

Standing on the highest branches of Shade Academy’s great tree, Minerva and Temujin gazed down at the tiny specks below.

Unlike the outer perimeter, the middle-zone was significantly more populated. Groups of Vacuo’s citizens and Shade Academy’s students were bunched together. The Cuckoos would no doubt notice what was happening.

Minerva had to act fast. Her spellcasting had to be swift, but precise. The point of her wand jabbed at the various focuses for her Magic, before violently flicking them upward. Bodies levitated into the air, clear of any sleeping innocents.

As some of the Grimm realized what was going on, they began to morph back into their monstrous forms. But by the time they could utter a single sound of resistance, Temujin silenced them.

The old wolf Faunus took a number of arrows shafts in hand, and loosed them all at once. A stream of projectiles coated in black Aura sniped the flushed prey like a high accuracy shotgun.

Without a moment’s pause to see the end of her partner’s work, Minerva was already levitating the next batch—and then the next.

“I need more targets!” Temujin hollered, after a time.

“Silence, you cackling fur rug. My role requires more concentration.”

“I can only hope so, and it isn’t about having second thoughts on killing your students.”

“They are not my students,” Minerva clenched her teeth, as she lifted another group of Cuckoos into the air.

“How certain. It’s very possible Emerald missed Enchanting a few.”

“There will not be any innocents among them.”

“It is possible.”

“…”

Temujin didn’t meet Minerva’s brief glare.

“Truth be told, if she missed a few, they would still be considered acceptable losses.”

The Headmaster’s anger boiled for a second, but was channeled into the violent purpose of her wand.

“Emerald will not err. I taught her myself…!” Minerva grunted.

“…I see.”

“And her Magic surpasses my own.”

“Hmph. Quite the pedestal you’ve placed for the girl.”

“As if you and I haven’t been training her team to combat the Witch herself.”

In the small break between shooting down her last targets and waiting for the next, Temujin spared a thought in the Hanging Garden’s direction. She wondered how the main team was performing—the three who were charged with the most occupied section of the city.

As far as they were, Minerva and Temujin could hear distant explosions. As well as the disgusting caws of dying Cuckoos.

…

“Clearing three!” Yang called out.

Racing down Vacuo’s main thoroughfare, Yang made a hard angle turn towards a trio of confused bystanders. When they saw the blazing blonde rocketing toward them, they began to drop their forms. But any resistance they could put up paled in the strength of the girl hurling them into the air.

At the same time, Neo made out a couple of moving bodies in houses. The team would waste crucial time trying to navigate indoors, so she dropped them down a mirror portal like a trapdoor. Her targets reappeared with the other Grimm flushed into the sky.

“I got ‘em!” Mercury shouted, before leaping off one of the nearby roofs.

He concentrated pockets of dense air at his heels. And then, with a resounding kick, the aerial bullets pierced the flightless birds. Their overgrown skulls cracked open with a sickening crunch, as they faded to nothing but ash.

Still treading the air, Mercury used his vantage point to spot the next number of confused wanderers.

“Five in my sights!” Mercury called.

“Pull!” Yang answered.

The young man dove down, and skidded across the rough road on his landing. His body postured low under the unsuspecting group. And then, with a chain of upper-cutting kicks, launched the targets into the air, positioning them much like Yang and Neo had done before.

The Spring Maiden stopped in her tracks to unleash a flurry of blows. Artillery shells from her Ember Celica detonated the prey at the peak of their lift. And then, it was on to the next Cuckoos.

It was a crude, but effective method Temujin developed. Each of the Gun Dog squadrons was assigned a spotter, a flusher, and an exterminator—or some mixed combination of the three. Emerald’s massive Enchantment negated any panic unwary innocents would have caused, while making it easier to identify the Cuckoos. Their next main focus was to separate the Grimm from its immediate surroundings, which usually involved casting them into the air. There, they would be safely disposed of.

Apart from the other two teams, Yang, Neo, and Mercury traded between roles in order to conserve as much Aura and stamina as possible. The fluidness of the interchange set a low margin for error, but the trio performed it with all the flawless execution of a perfect killing machine.

As Mercury and Yang hurled another group of Cuckoos into the sky, the pests managed to complete their transformations into their original forms. Their gross necks elongated their overly sized heads as their beaks parted. A cacophony of cries screeched above Vacuo.

Despite the altitude, the team could feel the life force sucked from the area, making the air thinner.

Neo took aim, her thin blade exposed from its sheathe. Her irises flickered a sharp light, as her sword worked a blinding fashion. Even though she was still groundside, her attack pierced the Cuckoos from afar.

Neo’s training with Raven did much to improve her sword work, as well as awaken the abilities of her Silver Eyes. Just like her “mentor” had shown during their deathmatches, the petite girl was now able to distort time and space to an extent that her blade was able to strike from a distance and seemingly multiple times at once.

Still…

This isn’t good.

Yang clenched her teeth, as she continued to lead her squadron’s charge through the area.

We’re starting to cut it close.

The last batch got their attacks off. More of them are starting to catch on.

We need to do move faster.

Seeming to read her mind, Neo and Mercury accelerated alongside her. Their wash, rinse, and repeat pattern grew more rapid in its pace. They carved a swathe of floating Cuckoos in their wake, paving from one section of the city to another.

It’s only a matter of time.

I got a bad feeling.

.

X  X  X X  X

.

“I have a bad feeling. Hm.”

Salem stood in the middle of the Black Oasis, while facing the direction of Vacuo. Her brow squinted in concentration, sensing the events transpiring in the distance.

“They are purging the Cuckoos,” Bean appeared at her side, having detected the same thing.

“So, they are. It is time we made our move, as well. Notify our forces. The moment for Vacuo to be put out of its pitiful misery has arrived.”

“I understand.”

The boy turned, and headed into the cave to rouse their soldiers. At the same time, he linked his thoughts to the various leaders of the Grimm Clans. Their dark army would be ready to march in a matter of minutes.

Salem allowed herself a small smile of approval, as she gave a passing gaze to the humongous black cocoon bridging two cliffsides.

“Well, then. A valiant effort on your part.”

But did you really think it would be so easy?

.

X  X X  X  X

.

Neo was the first to notice the abrupt change.

She immediately stopped midstride and closed her eyes, as if entering meditation. Yang and Mercury slid to a halt as well when they noticed. Just when they were about to ask what was wrong, the answer to their question came over the radio.

“Salem is aware we are eliminating the Cuckoos. She is activating them. All of them,” Mouse’s voice crackled.

“We still have a quarter of the city left we didn’t cover…!” Yang bit her lip. She looked to Mercury, and then, to Neo. The fight wasn’t out of them yet, and neither was it for her. “I was starting to think this was going a little too smoothly for an ENMY gig,” she commented with a light heart.

“See? Our luck’s total shit,” Mercury remarked. “I’ll get our ducks in a row?”

“And I’ll knock ‘em down. Do or die time.”

“The words our team lives by.”

“Can you get them all?”

“…Not all of them. Neo’s probably working her Silver Eye voodoo to find them, but it’s not like I can—”

“Neo maps them, I’ll translate the locations, Merc pulls, and Yang’ll mop them up,” Emerald’s sudden orders came over the comms.

“Em?! Aren’t you supposed to be maintaining the Enchantment?!” Yang exclaimed.

“I can multitask! Neo, feed me the positions of the remaining Cuckoos, double time!”

The petite girl’s scrunching face blinked open, and a bright light poured from her vision.

Her abilities were not perfect and far from infinite. But her sight encompassed an All-Seeing Truth. Whatever the moment, whatever the distance, whatever the depth, if Neo concentrated hard enough, she could see it. If only for a moment.

But a moment was all she needed.

“A trained swordsman must take in the world in a flash,” Raven’s mantra whispered the back of her mind.

“Read the terrain and your opponent, like that!” she snapped her fingers.

“The scenery changes, the landscape shifts, all in the blink of an eye.

So, you need to capture that.

It’s the world in a single moment.”

Raven’s katana drew just short of Neo’s throat.

“And you need to wield your blade in the same instant.

Knowing what I know about you, it should be something you can excel at.”

Neo viewed the locations of the remaining Cuckoos in vivid reality. Their outlines, their exact coordinates, all of it was captured in her memory, despite the enhanced sight being granted for a nanosecond. She tapped her communicator quickly after.

It was Emerald’s turn. She kept track of her team’s whereabouts and instantly accessed Neo’s memories. And like a well-prepared document wrapped in a bow, Emerald took what was mentally presented to her, and packaged it Mercury’s way. In the transference, she added her own brand of assistance to the data.

Mercury’s mind was suddenly filled with thoughts that were not his own. The familiar sensation of his brain being hijacked was something he was fairly used to, but never liked. Still, he allowed Emerald to take over his senses.

It wasn’t just plain sight that came to him, it was something he could only describe as a sixth sense being opened. A type of clairvoyance that was impossible to perceive by normal standards.

The locations of the remaining Cuckoos were not simply shown, but “illuminated”. He recognized the targets’ exact positions in reference to himself. A complete awareness of spatial cognizance layered into his conscience.

“Damn. They gave me auto-aim and no fog of war?” Mercury scoffed with an impressed tone. “Leave it to Neo and Em to prep the best cheats.”

He breathed deep and measured his timing. The Cuckoos were already about to siphon the life from their surroundings, but it would do no good to rush. His confidence had to be unwavering.

“Dominance is key,” Temujin’s words echoed his memory.

“Your Semblance and mine have a similar peculiarity.

You possess an aggressive heart.

You pent up all those things your environment gives you, and you trap it in that little chest of yours.

Your emotions, your suffering, your sins.

And then, when you’ve had enough, you lash out. Unleash what is inside onto the rest of the world.

But you lack direction.

Do not blindly release the storm brewing in your soul.

Temper it!

It is an instrument that can be used to control your environment.

And when you master such a thing, the sky will no longer be just an outlet for your rage, or merely your playground.

It will be your domain.”

“Everything above the ground belongs to the sky,” Mercury said quietly. “And I am the sky.”

The wings on his heels flourished, like a great bird of prey taking flight. Wind and air within a several mile radius answered his call. His influence extended to the very atmospheric pressure and weather itself. Even sound silenced at his increasing concentration.

It was a small motion, barely noticeable. But in the stillness of the thick stagnant space, the stomp of his left foot amplified, like the world shaking. As if a deity had laid down a new law on the mortal realm.

Every Cuckoo was expelled into the sky without exception. They were mere moments from killing those around them, but in the span of a breath, Mercury flushed them out like the poison they were.

“You really are something, Merc,” Yang couldn’t help, but say in amazement. “You, Em, and Neo are seriously something. It’d be embarrassing if I fell behind now.”

The Spring Maiden’s hair flared with blazing excitement, as she cracked her gauntlets together. Her irises painted with a bright-orange glow. She could see the burning cracks marking the Grimm’s weaknesses. The “life” fluctuating in their bodies was already emitting a feeble light.

“I Burn.”

.

X  X X  X  X

.

“Hm. It appears the team of miscreants is growing into a greater thorn than initially anticipated. Due to yours and Temujin’s teachings, no doubt,” Salem said, while staring off a cliff, in the direction of Vacuo.

“It’s not direct action against you,” Raven replied. “No breach in contract.”

“I know. Your offenses aren’t punishable…yet.”

Raven chuckled. “Is the great Witch starting to slip?”

“You can hope, but you’d only disappoint yourself.”

“…”

“The efforts of your daughter’s team and your old allies is of little matter. Vacuo will not see another sunrise after today.”

Raven couldn’t muster a comeback. There was no point. That, and the evidence laid before her silenced any realistic rebuttal.

The endless stampede of countless limbs trampled the desert below their perch. Grimm of all manner of make and terror made its march on the capital. A host of monsters Remnant would possibly never witness again. An army that painted the golden sands of Vacuo in shadow.

“For what it is worth, Raven, I am sorry it had to come to this.”

“……No, you’re not.”

“You were once my most loyal knight. And now, I destroy your home because of your previous betrayal. I truly do lament this.”

Raven wanted with everything to draw her blade, and cut down the woman in front of her. It would be a kill of weightless guilt. The easiest death she could ever gift.

“I can only wonder the price your next betrayal will warrant,” Salem resumed.

“You’ll have to end Vacuo first. It’s not decided yet.”

“Oh, is it not foregone conclusion?”

“The strongest will survive Vacuo.”

“My dear, tsk tsk tsk,” the Witch clicked her tongue, while shaking her head disappointedly. “How long do you plan to delude yourself? I doubt even Temujin still considers that creed to hold true any longer.”

“Despite all your schemes, you still don’t know how this story ends,” Raven spoke her last words of defiance.

“Oh, but I do, poor Raven.”

The Witch turned to the gigantic cocoon with a pulsing red core behind them. Large cracks in the shell began to heave like melted ice caps. The dark webbing gave way to the monstrous creature hatching inside.

The first part to break out into the light of day, were a pair of gruesome wings. So large and jagged, but possessing of some mysterious elegance. One beat of its dark sails kicked up a gale of tornadoes.

Raven could hardly believe what she was witnessing. The sight of the nightmarish Grimm was enough to shake the most veteran of Hunters.

In the meantime, Salem only gleaned a satisfied smile to herself.

“Have I rid you of your naïve delusions?”

.

X  X X  X  X

.

As the last Cuckoo was eliminated, Mouse’s panicked voice crackled over the radio.

“Temujin! We have a problem!”

“Calm yourself, Mouse. What is it? Has a deviation occurred?” the elder asked.

“No. Purging the Cuckoos has incited Salem to attack as planned. But it is only now, that the means have been revealed.”

“So, her army marches?”

“Yes, but before that, there is a greater problem!”

“What is it?”

As Temujin wondered what could rattle Mouse so, she found her question answered by the enormous black shade flapping its wings towards them. She could see the Grimm over the height of the city’s walls. Although it was still far, she made a rough estimate of its size—and its sheer mass made her doubt her senses.

“What in the world?”

“Anyone else see that fucking thing?!” Emerald shouted over the comms. “I’ve never seen a Grimm that huge!”

“That is because there’s never been one…”

“I read up on all the Nightmare Class Grimm in Vacuo. Only one of them matches that description, and it’s supposed to be in hibernation, isn’t it?!”

“It appears the Witch modified its sleep cycle.”

“And apparently its diet! That thing looks roided out compared to the pictures!”

“Finish your Enchantments, Emerald. Remember to relay my orders. Our people must be ready to fight as soon as possible!” Temujin ordered.

“Shit! SHIT!”

Despite the curses, Emerald reached into the Vacuo citizens’ dream states, and carried out Temujin’s orders.

As she and Minerva readied to return to the Hanging Gardens, the elder woman could only look on to the horizon with a bleak expression. Salem’s Grimm army was circling to hit the city on all fronts. And making its way, in the most direct route possible, a monster-like butterfly continued to beat its wings.

“Behemoth…”

[jordan202]

Maybe This Time

Hey guys, I was watching the scenes from episode 12 and it just got me thinking… I don’t usually write a different story while working on something else, but I was probably going to forget about the idea I had. I didn’t plan for it to take this turn but the story got a life of its own :) 

Oh, I am in a hurry for a double shift so I didn’t ask anyone to proofread. I apologize in advance for my mistakes. The title isn’t coincidental.

Maybe This Time

Amelia nervously tapped her fingers on the working desk, too anxious for the computer results. During the past week, as she watched her patient being submitted to radiotherapy to treat a recurrent tumor, the neurosurgeon had struggled to come up with a viable plan that might allow her team to properly fund their ambitious plan.

While she knew the procedure was a sort of a Hail Mary and had its flaws, Amelia was desperately in need of something that would give her patient hope.

Maybe the reason behind all that was that she needed something to give her hope.

Lately, her life had been nothing but a mess. After a failed marriage, which she refused to think much about, and a brain tumor that had given Amelia answers about her impulsivity but had also served to confuse her feelings even more, the neurosurgeon longed for something that would be good and actually help someone. It was actually easier to focus her energy on the study for Kimmie’s tumor and devote her entire time to it than trying to figure out the mess that her personal life had become.

“So, have you come up with anything yet?”

Amelia’s thoughts were distracted by the sound of Alex Karev’s words and she saw the look of defeat on his face. Much to her own dismay, he also hadn’t been successful to get any kind of support for their project. It pretty much seemed like a dead end for them. Even Bello and DeLuca were losing motivation and Amelia couldn’t blame them. There were several other projects out there that were soaring and the eager interns probably would rather spend their time actually learning something than staying immersed on a computer all day doing research.

Alex gazed at the neurosurgeon and saw the consternation on her face.

“It looks like we’re really going to lose this battle,” Karev commented, obviously unhappy about it.

Amelia hated that situation. And she hated what she was about to propose. But then she thought of Kimmie’s joy and the girl’s happiness at sharing her gift with the world. Something had to be done.

“Not yet,” Amelia said with determination, looking into Alex’s eyes. “I have an idea…”

.

“You have to be kidding me,” Thomas Koracick’s annoyance was obvious not only in his voice, but also on the look on his face and the way he walked, “you have to be freaking kidding me.”

“Look, Tom, I…”

“YOU tricked me here saying you had a groundbreaking project for me,” Koracick nearly hissed, looking at his former’s student with impatience. “I actually bailed on presenting a case at the American College of Surgeons and got on a flight to this hell hole because I believed you and this is what you have for me?” he frowned, absolutely irritated. “HIFU? Are you kidding me?”

Amelia sighed heavily, knowing she shouldn’t be surprised. A couple of days before, she had gotten in touch with her former boss at Johns Hopkins. Tom Koracick ran the neurosurgical department there and had more resources at his disposal than anyone else she could remember. A few weeks prior to that, Tom had flown over to operate on her brain tumor and he’d even stuck around to help her get her department back on track once she was recovered. Before he could return to Hopkins, the two of them had slept together but Amelia knew it hadn’t really meant anything. Not to her, at least, and she supposed that not for Tom either.

For Amelia, it had been all about having a rebound after her complicated separation from her husband. It still sounded funny to think of Owen as that, since they weren’t even living in the same house anymore… But until their divorce was finalized, Amelia knew that technically, that was what he was.

And for Tom, sleeping with her had probably been about his own ego. Amelia knew he was a womanizer and even though during her residency the guy had been extremely professional, never had he hidden the fact that if Amelia ever gave him an opening, he wouldn’t hesitate to sleep with her. She had never really been interested, especially while he was her boss. But now, the two of them were at a leveled position, both ran neurosurgical departments and Amelia had impulsively done it. Physically, it had felt okay, but emotionally, Amelia knew it hadn’t really meant anything.

“It has never been tested on brain tumors before…” Amelia tried to reason and hopefully convince him.

“Oh, why do you think that is?” Koracick sarcastically asked, looking at her as if she should have known better. HIFU, or high frequency focused ultrasound was a non-invasive method that recently was being studied to treat tumors. That wasn’t exactly news in the surgical word.

“No one has really studied it on brain tumors…” Amelia sheepishly gave it another try.

“Yes, exactly!” Koracick interrupted her. “I am sure I don’t need to tell you that even if you successfully blast tumor cells with this new technology there is just no way you can guarantee clean margins and without the full, resection the likelihood that the tumor…”

“…will grow back is high, I know, I know,” Amelia sighed, hating to admit he was right. On tumors that could be later operated or managed with follow up, the HIFU method seemed like a good option. But for brain tumors, there were no guarantees it would work on the long run. “But it could help her buy some time and who knows even…”

“This is exactly why your project got rejected,” during the brief time he’d been at the hospital, Thomas had been brought to speed on the contest and saw the few projects that had made it. “It’s not cost effective, you should know that” he condescendingly rolled his eyes at her. “It doesn’t matter how noble your intentions are, Shepherd. Haven’t you learned this by now? Why would anyone in their right minds invest money on a study that promises no different outcome than a partial resection would?”

“You’re being extremely pessimistic!” Amelia lost her patience with him. “You’re putting all these obstacles when you’ve barely given me a chance to try.” She understood his frustration but he was throwing a bucket of ice water on her plans and that infuriated her.

Especially because she couldn’t refute any of his arguments.

“Look, you know I would love to help you if I could but my hands are tied,” Koracick sighed heavily, regaining some of his calmness. “Trust me, I deal with this kind of debacle all the time and I know you desperately want to help this kid, but it’s better if you just play it clean with the family instead of playing God here, okay?” Amelia scowled, hating to feel like once again he was the professor and she the inexperienced intern, but at the moment, it was exactly how she felt. “I have promised Catherine I’d have dinner with her. She wants me to properly meet her husband,” the neurosurgeon rolled his eyes, as if he was dreading the idea. “I am sorry I can’t help you.”

Amelia watched as Tom Koracick left, hating the fact she couldn’t really hate him for what he was doing. In his place, she probably would have done the same. And now she was back to square one.

For the rest of the day, Amelia stayed immersed in her project, trying to think about any loopholes she could fix to make the idea more tempting for Koracick. She knew he would be in town at least until the following day, so she was racing the clock.

After hours reading in front of the computer, too focused on what she was studying, the click of the door handle started Amelia, causing her to nearly jump from her chair at the unexpected interruption.

“Uh, sorry…” a deep male voice spoke in a low tone. “I had no idea the room was taken.”

Amelia looked up to meet the eyes of the man she was married to. Other than the brief, awkward encounter at the house when she’d walked in on him having breakfast with another woman, they hadn’t really been alone in the same room ever since the day they’d returned their wedding bands to each other.

“It’s okay,” Amelia rubbed her tired eyes, shocked to realize it was nearly midnight. “I was just reading and lost track of time.”

“I was printing some papers earlier today and I think I left my phone charger here somewhere,” Owen justified his presence, pointing at his dead phone. “I’ve been looking for it everywhere and realized I last used it here.”

Amelia got up from her chair and helped him look, scrolling through the files and forgotten objects in the room that was mainly used by interns and residents.

For the following seconds, the neurosurgeon unsuccessfully tried to find the charger, but the lingering silence was growing uncomfortable by the second.

“So…” she cleared her throat, eager to make small talk, “you’re on the liver project, right?” Amelia distractedly asked. She wasn’t really sure. “How is that working out?”

“I was actually trying for a clot factor study but I dropped it,” Owen answered with a shrug. He saw the question on her face and elaborated, “research is not really my thing.”

“Yeah, you’ve always been more of a do-er than a planner,” Amelia smiled.

The neurosurgeon failed to realize at the time of her comment just how personal she sounded. But Owen captured the intimacy it implied and he avoided thinking much about it, choosing instead to focus on his search.

“Why clot factors, though?” Amelia asked after a few seconds of silence.

“I had read about this chained Polymer that was isolated not long ago,” Owen explained. “It basically adheres to hepatocytes and you can sort of choose the cell you’re working with.”

“Really?” Amelia frowned heavily, uncontrollably assaulted by ideas. “You mean like a selective binding protein?”

“Yeah, there is a full catalogue of those at Polymer that have been isolated but even though it sounds good, it’s not very viable for out type of research,” Owen added. “It has an extremely high cost and the patents are just insanely hard to get.”

“Can you tell me more about your clot factor work?” Amelia asked. The more information she had, the better would be to fit all puzzles together.

“Uh… Okay,” Owen saw the eagerness on her face and agreed. It was late and he was tired, but if that was going to make her happy, he could stick around for a few more minutes.

Very patiently, Owen sat down near a computer and logged into a system. For the following minutes, he thoroughly explained Amelia about the idea he’d had. During the entire time, it became kind of hard to ignore her presence. Especially when she stood so close like that. Was it just him, or did her hair smell especially good today?

“This is actually very helpful,” Amelia leaned forward to examine the computer screen a little closer, unaware of the reactions she was causing on the man sitting right next to her.

Owen closed his eyes and swallowed hard. He really shouldn’t be having those thoughts. Well technically, he should, because the woman responsible for invoking those feelings was his wife, but a thousand complications and unspoken issues stood in the way and he really didn’t want to deal with his feelings.

“Do you mind if I print this?” Amelia looked at him with expectation in her eyes.

Owen knew her well enough to realize she was up to something. And judging by the look on her face, it was good.

“Sure,” he instantly agreed, satisfied that his abandoned project had served at least to the purpose of making her smile like that again. He hadn’t seen in ever since the day she’d left their home and his life. “Feel free to use it.”

“Thank you,” Amelia shyly bit her lower lip and made eye contact with him, seeing the warmth in his eyes. She smiled brightly and tried to ignore the way her heart accelerated when he smiled back. “Good night, Owen.”

“Good night,” he reluctantly left the room, knowing that it was the wisest decision.

.

“So you’re telling me you want me to fund a multi million project in which you’ll basically buy the most expensive protein I’ve ever seen so you can blast it with high frequency waves?” Tom Koracick frowned, looking at Amelia with a mix of surprise and admiration.

“Precisely,” Amelia smiled widely, struggling to contain her excitement, “but the real catch here is that, when I blast those cells, the whole tumor will be gone.”

“I don’t know this is insane or purely genius,” Koracick commented, skimming through the paper that had her detailed project.

Amelia had spent the last ten hours coming up with the plan. Her body was tired, but her mind was too alert and excited for her to want to sleep.

“Where did you get the idea?” Koracick frowned, hating that he didn’t have it first.

“A colleague inspired me,” Amelia confessed. “He was going for something along those lines and I adapted his idea to mine.”

“Get him here,” Koracick unceremoniously demanded.

Amelia desperately needed Tom to embark on the project, because she depended on him to finance it. So she decided not to refute. Grabbing her cell phone, she called Owen, gently asking if he could meet her in one of the conference rooms.

About fifteen minutes later, the trauma surgeon joined them, supposing Amelia needed help with something they’d discussed the previous night. But to his surprise, he found her sitting next to Thomas Koracick, the same guy who had taken out her tumor.

Before Owen could ask any questions, Amelia started to fill him on what she’d spent the entire night working with. After Owen had introduced her to the Polymer idea, she had basically filtered through a huge catalog, finding the heaviest binding protein she could that would link to a receptor present only in cancerous cells. Those would heavily increase the mass of the tumor, including the tissue near the margins. Then, once with the ultrasound technique she was working on, it would be possible to work with the HIFU at a frequency that not only would kill the sick cells, but also make sure they had clean margins. Without the heavy Polymer, it was hard to tell and adjust the machine to sort out the diseased tissues from the healthy one, but once Amelia made the cancer cells much heavier, chances of success were incredibly higher.

“This is a brilliant idea,” he stated with conviction after taking a look at her initial proposal. “But the cost would be beyond the charts,” Owen affirmed, certain it would be a problem. “I mean, this Polymer chain you selected costs nearly twice as much as the one I had. It’s going to increase the cost of the project. And it’s not guaranteed it’ll work.”

Amelia was aware of that. She on purpose kept silence, sneakily turning her head to the side very slowly until her eyes finally met Tom’s.

“Give me a concrete reason why I should invest my money on this,” the arrogant surgeon demanded, raising his eyebrows.

“I am going to make history treating gliomas. And if you don’t fund my idea, I am going to sell it to someone who is going to make it happen.” Amelia raised her eyebrows in defiance. “And if I do that, your name won’t be on the paper when it gets published,” she sneakily reminded him, knowing nothing would infuriate Koracick more than letting an opportunity pass. “You’ll lose.”

Tom narrowed his eyes, studying Amelia’s features. She was serious, he knew it. Rolling his eyes, the prestigious surgeon finally made up his mind.

“Fine, but you’re going to report to me. I am going to be here when we use the HIFU for the first time. My name goes before yours on the project,” he dared her, seeing on Amelia’s scowl that she hated it. “And keep this guy, he clearly is more familiar than us with the Polymer thing.”

“No, thanks,” Owen straightforwardly answered. He wouldn’t mind doing it if it was for Amelia, but he had never sympathized with the guy who had once been her mentor and he definitely wasn’t going to be a part of something that would benefit him more than the true author of the project.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Amelia protested Koracick’s terms. “Hell no. Your name is not going before mine.”

“These are my conditions, it’s give or take,” Koracick said in a final tone.

“God… I hate you!” Amelia complained. But she knew she couldn’t give it up. Koracick was her only chance to keep the project going and most importantly, actually give Kimmie a chance. The hard work was just beginning and she would need a lot of help, but it all started with the funding.

“I have a plane to catch, you keep me updated,” Koracick wickedly winked in her direction, loving that he was coming out on top. And just as he was reaching the door, Amelia was collecting her stuff and Owen was logging out the computer, the controversial surgeon turned around, unable to help himself. “If you thought that sleeping with me would give you special treatment, you better think again, Shepherd,” he smirked, knowing he was causing a scene. Even though Amelia hadn’t said it, Koracick had recognized the guy in the room as the husband she’d recently separated from. He was glad he was leaving, because fixing marital drama wasn’t his thing. He was much better at causing it. “Email me as soon as you have phase one initiated.”

Koracick exited without another word, leaving Amelia in absolute shock. Not because he had been inappropriate, rude and extremely unprofessional. She was used to his teasing and didn’t mind it when it was just the two of them. But at that moment, her heart was racing and she had an awful feeling in her stomach.

Amelia knew that, by the time she’d slept with Koracick, she and Owen had already broken things off. She also knew that he had no right to judge her on it, considering he had pretty much slept with the first woman he found right after that.

But she was well aware of how possessive men could be. Especially men like Owen. And she recalled just how they’d agreed to blame all the problems of their marriage on her brain tumor, as if her feelings for him had been questionable while Owen didn’t really have a similar excuse to justify why he’d broken the marriage…

“Owen, I…”

“Good luck with your project,” he violently shut off the computer without waiting for it to properly turn off.

It was obvious he was furious and Amelia got instantly mad at that too.

“You can’t be serious, right?” she asked him just as Owen was about to exit through the door. “Are you really that upset that I had a one night stand? Really?” she followed him to the door, hoping Owen would calm down. He had always failed at keeping rational when he was furious like that. And she was actually surprised that he had been so bothered by it, to the point of getting that mad. “You spent the past weeks fooling around with that…”

“Don’t,” Owen grabbed her slim wrist and stopped Amelia from touching him just as she’d been about to. “Don’t say anything. You don’t owe me any explanations,” Amelia looked at him and instead of the warm, caring eyes, she found the scowl of a guy who was just too mad to even pretend he was okay. “You are a free woman. You can do whatever you want,” he said and Amelia instantly noticed his calm, rational speech completely contrasted with his infuriated reaction. But even though she noticed something was off, never would she be prepared to hear what would come next. “If you have to sleep with Koracick to get funding for your project, then so be it,” he cruelly accused her, knowing he was being extremely unfair. But Owen couldn’t help himself. The news had caught him totally off guard, and the way it had infuriated him had surprised him even more. “Next time just leave me out of it, okay? I don’t want to be a part of another one of your games.”

Amelia felt the blow the instant the words fired out of Owen’s mouth. She didn’t know what hurt her the most, the way he had cruelly accused her of something they both knew wasn’t true, or the cold look on his face as he’d done it.

The first tear rolled on her cheek, enraging Amelia even more.

Screw Owen, she thought, trying to contain the tears that insisted on falling. He had been the one to change his mind… It had been Owen the one to break off their marriage… It had also been Owen the one to jump into someone else’s bed and take a random woman to the house they’d once shared the minute she’d left the house. So he had no right to play that low.

How dare him accuse her of that? Amelia sighed heavily, heartbreak and hurt slowly being replaced by anger and determination. Briefly, she thought about giving up the project and telling Owen to shove his Polymer idea up his ass. But she couldn’t do that because Kimmie’s life depended on it.

And as she went on with her day, blaming exhaustion and sleep deprivation rather than her hurt feelings for the way she struggled to keep focus, Amelia felt more determined to make her innovative project work. It was the only thing in her life worth focusing on.

Owen could take care of his bruised ego on his own. Maybe their idea to become friends was really faded to disaster. After all, they could barely interact without the heavy cloud of their unresolved issues lingering on their heads. And if Owen’s display of anger served as example for what was about to come, Amelia thought maybe it was better to simply never go there after all.

[lostinthemazecalledmyhead]

Imagine you found out that you have a sister, Sookie Stackhouse, unwillingly you fall into her world of supernatural creatures. Being a more advanced mindreader than Sookie, all supernatural eyes are on you. You’re a weapon, but will you make it out alive?

Part three Double heart

Part one  (All your life) Part two  (Stay in the dark) Part three (Double heart) Part four (Better dig two)

Word Count: 2236

Warnings: Swearing

Summary: Being back in Bon Temp you come across a connection you didn’t expect to find.

Previously: Alcide visited you at your house and told you that you needed to come back to Bon Temps with him.

It would be so wrong for you to say that you came along because Alcide is so persuasive. Why would that be so wrong you ask? Because you have morals of some kind. The kind that tells you that you should not just think about yourself. Okay, screw it! You came along because the thought of a supernatural adventure thrilled you. How many times have you re-watched Vampire diaries or Supernatural. This time it’s your time to kick some supernatural ass. And you’re doing ‘it’ again. Smiling sheepishly at your own thoughts. “You came back.” Sam greets you surprised. Not the kind of warm welcome you were hoping for. Alcide insisted on taking you here because he said the food is not better anywhere else. The food must be real crappy everywhere else then, for this to be the best food… You are not stupid. Alcide took you here because of Sookie. Your damned sister. Sitting down in the back of the bar flashes dance before your eyes. A vision. Having these visions is like watching tv, but in your mind. You’ve been shown images, video’s but also feelings. It doesn’t always clearly show what is about to happen, but putting together what is shown to you in your vision you mostly can figure things out. The image that is shown to you this time is a picture of Eric. He is somewhere in the woods and the feelings you are getting with this image are scared at first and then, passion? What? It sometimes happens that you interpret something wrong and this must be one of those times. Alcide sits down across from you. “So,” you say folding your hands underneath your chin. “what is it that you’re really up to?” “We’re here to see Sookie.” He tells you. You wave your hand at him. “Yeah, tell me something I don’t know.” Does he really think you’re that dumb. “I mean what are you planning to use me for? Because I see a little of Eric in my future.” Alcide arches his dark eyebrow at you. “What are you talking about?” He asks confused. “She’s talking about a tall, blonde handsome man walking into her life.” Eric sits down next to Alcide. “Well if it isn’t the big bad wolf and the big bad vampire sharing a drink, thinking their deep thoughts and desires.” You say leaning back in your seat. Eric laughs. “She really is something, huh.” He tells Alcide, who is not amused at all. “I like her.” Eric adds looking at you. “Well color me blessed.” You scoff sarcastic. “Feisty too.” Eric notices. “That could come in handy.” Alcide turns to Eric. “What are you doing here?” Alcide growls. “To look at my new asset, of course.” Eric replies not once breaking his stare down that he is having with you. “I’m not some cow that you can just take in.” You tell Eric. “I’m more than that.” “Oh, you’re much more.” Eric agrees. “That’s why I want you so bad.” With a smile on your face you lean across the table towards Eric. “Oh, really?” You ask him teasingly. “How bad?” “I have a proposition for you.” Eric tells you, suddenly all business like. You hold up your hand, telling him to keep quiet. “Food first. Then I’ll listen.” You command him. Eric watches you and finally turns to Alcide. “Well, you hear the lady. Give her some food.” Alcide growls. He clearly despises Eric. Still he gets up to order some food. “Give me one reason to trust you instead of him.” You tell Eric hurried when Alcide is out of hearing range. “Honesty.” Eric tells you. “You’re a smart girl. It’s no use in lying to you. I won’t, but I can’t say the same for our hairy friend.” Pursing your lips you shrug. “Not really what I was looking for, but whatever.” You kick back resting your feet on Eric’s chair. “What were you looking for?” Eric asks genuinely interested. With pursed lips you smile amused. “Well wouldn’t the almighty vampire like to know.” Playing around with such powerful creatures may no be the brightest idea, but what is life without a risk. Before Eric could say something else Alcide returns with a hamburger and fries. “Jeez, I’m starving.” You tell him before digging your teeth into the burger. Feeling uncomfortable the men watch you devour the hamburger. “Well, talk.” You bid Eric after you ate the whole hamburger and he still hasn’t started his proposal.  “I need someone to help me on a mission.” Eric tells you. Hello vagueness. You think still looking down at your fries. Which are not even that good by the way. “I’ll pay you richly.” He adds hoping to catch your interest. Instead you look up at him, with dead bored eyes. “So does my job.” Eric is speechless and you take a wild guess and say he is not very often. Not impressed you continue to eat your fries. You tap into Alcide and feel that he is delighted by the way you are treating Eric. “Better wipe that smirk off your mind, werewolf boy.” You tell Alcide in-between eating. Alcide coughs shocked that you read his mind, while Eric just smiles amused and even impressed. “Where are you staying?” Eric asks out of nowhere. “I’ll swing by later tonight and talk to you when werewolf boy isn’t around.” He just stole your nickname. Copyright... “Well Alcide dragged my ass over here and therefore, I have no place to stay, unless there is something I don’t know.” “I forgot. You can crash on my couch.” Alcide says. “Or you could stay at my house.” Eric says, making you raise your eyebrow at him. “You would have your own wing.” Eric’s mind is silent so you focus on him. It takes a lot of concentration, but you are able to catch a glimpse of something. “Fuck me sideways.” You blurt out without thinking. “You are sincere!” Your astonishment catches them off guard. “I think it’s time to go.” You stand up. Still a bit put off the men don’t move. “Well, Eric, are you dead or something?” Okay that may not have been the best question to ask someone who is actually dead. Do you seriously don’t have an off switch?

“That looks good on you.” Eric’s voice scares you to death. You thought you were alone in your guestroom. Wearing only your panties and an oversized Fangtasia t-shirt that he gave you. Your hair is worn down and you were just dancing around the huge room when Eric’s voice interrupted your music. “Ever heard of knocking?” You ask, not even the slightest bit of uncomfortable about your bareness.

“If I had knocked I would never have seen that move you made.” Eric tells you grinning. Smiling devilishly you turn up the music and grab his hand. “Knocking wouldn’t have made a difference, corpse.” Alcide got his nickname, now it’s only fair to give Eric one too. Adoring Eric looks down on you while your bodies move to the rhythm of the music. “I’m not going to sleep with you.” You tell him out of the blue.

“You really are remarkable at mind reading. I never met anyone who could read a vampires mind so easily.” Eric tells you astound.

“Oh, I didn’t need to read your mind to know what you were thinking.” You tell him satisfied. Bon Temps was maybe not so bad after all. You are, after all, having fun.

“Devilish.” Eric remarks

“I would love to say ‘that’s me’, but unfortunately I would be lying if I did.” You say.  Eric turns down the volume. “What do you mean unfortunately?” He asks curious. “I don’t know why I’m even telling you.” You say and shrug. “But I always dreamt of being something like I am becoming right now. A heroine in a story to be written down and read by thousands of hungry eyes, wishing for the possibility of experiencing the same thing. I’m sick of sitting in my small office reading cases and searching through laws to find a loophole, which may surprise you do exist.”

“You are a lawyer?” Eric asks you uncertain. You just nod. “Has someone ever told you, you are nothing like your sister?” Eric asks as if you have known your sister your whole life.

“I have, but how so?” You are starting to get curious as to why you are nothing like her. The both of you sit down on the end of the bed. “You’re educated, a risk taker, out-going, bubbly and just ..different.” Eric’s remark makes you smile. Whether or not he meant is as a compliment, you are definitely taking it that way.

“Why do you hate your life so much?” Eric asks surprising you. That is a way you never really thought of it. Did you really hate your life? It’s a tough question. “What happened to make you resent normal life?”

In your head you are discussing whether or not you should tell Eric.But in the end you are still not sure. “I don’t know, it’s stupid.” You say.

Half-heartedly you hoped he would drop the matter, but he doesn’t care for the fact that you don’t feel like sharing your inner thoughts. “I’m a really good listener.” He pushes.

Giving in you sigh. Whatever. “A few years ago I was dating Chuck, a tanned biker who used to live on the farm with his parents. I don’t really know what business he had with his biker gang, but he never talked about that.”

“So, he was a bad guy?” Eric asks.

You nod. “I guess I liked the mystery around him and the fact that he was a bad guy intrigued me in a way. Apparently I have a weak for the bad guy.” You tell him not realizing who you are talking to. With a charismatic smile and puppy eyes Eric looks down on you, making you realize what kind of effect your words now have on him. In his ears all he heard was: ‘I have a weak for you, Eric.’

“So what happened?”

“One day, he came home and he rolled up is sleeve. I never expected things to escalate so quickly, but it did. And I never meant for things to become that way, but I guess he decided for me that it should. There were two little hearts on my rodeo man. He practically slipped a ring right on my finger.”

“He wanted to marry you?” Eric asks uncertain.  

“Chuck didn’t say it with those exact word, but he tattooed two hearts on his shoulder. And at that moment I realized something. There was no way in hell that I was going to stay at home to watch the children and be a good housewife. I haven’t lived my life yet. All those years I was only alive, not actually living life. That’s why I left him with skid marks and a double heart.”

Eric chuckles. “A double heart.”

“Why is this funny to you?” You ask feeling a bit insulted.

“It’s just so beautiful the way your mind works.” He says, confusing you. “You left a guy because you were not satisfied with yourself.”

Feeling attacked you stand up. You could have chosen to say something nasty in return, there were plenty of things you could say, but you decide not to. Attacking back would only make you look worse. “What are you getting at, Eric?” You ask instead.

Eric rises to his feet. “It’s not an insult, sweets.” He assures you. Your eyes lock and Eric bends his face towards yours. Is he going to do what you think he is going to do? “What the hell are you doing?” You ask him not moving an inch. He pulls back looking at you. “Well, kissing you of course.”

“Did something in my story give you the idea that it was okay to do so?” You ask him. Was there something in your story you hadn’t realized made you seem cheap?

“Never mind.” Eric’s demeanor seems to change a bit. “The sun is about to rise, I’ve got to go.” With these words he leaves you wondering what went wrong. You go to bed and fall asleep quickly while the sun slowly rises. Stepping into a dream world you begin seeing things. Not dreams, though it could be mistaken for a dream by someone who doesn’t know any better. You see a body ignite and burn until there is nothing left, but black crisp. Eric. Wide awake you sit up straight in the bed that is way too big for you. Something is going to happen and you know it. Not only have you seen someone burn to death, but you could also feel it in your gut. And if there is one thing you’ve learned it’s to always trust your gut feeling. “Why does he has to have such a goddamned big place.” You curse while flying out the room into the big hall. Clutching your hands around your arms you focus on trying to get a premonition. A faint flash of someone throwing in a Molotov cocktail dances before your eyes. Rushing down the big stairs you run outside the door. You need to stop them before they do it.  On your bare feet you run across the grit, hurting your feet, but right now you don’t feel the pain. Adrenaline rushes through your veins. The sound of breaking glass draws your attention. It has happened. You’re too late.

[descientia]

On Faith & Prophecy —

Firstly, because I have been asked before, and because it is somewhat of an unpopular decision: I do abide by the events of Episode Ignis’s main verse and factor this into my portrayal of Ignis rather than headcanoning it out. That is to say, Ignis learned about the prophecy and Noctis’s required death from a dying Pryna, which for recap’s sake was this:

A power greater than even that of the Six, purifying all by the Light of the Crystal and the glaives of rulers past. Only at the throne can the Chosen receive it, and only at the cost of a life: his own. The King of Kings shall be granted the power to banish the darkness, but the blood price must be paid. To cast out the Usurper and usher in dawn’s light will cost the life of the Chosen. Many sacrificed all for the King; so must the King sacrifice himself for all. Now enter into Reflection, that the light of Providence shine within.

He also saw visions of pertinent future moments, such as Noctis killing himself on the throne ( cutscene here ).

Prior to this revelation, Ignis was only aware of as much of the prophecy as Noct and most people were: In a time of great need, the Oracle would help the Chosen King to claim the power of the Crystal and save the world from darkness. He did not know that Noct’s death was part of the deal, and fwiw I don’t think anyone but Regis and probably Lunafreya did.

Ignis also didn’t immediately accept Pryna’s vision as truth, and when he battles Ravus and argues about Luna’s sacrifice, he still stands by the prophecy as he has known it to be. As they watch Lunafreya’s spirit leave her body, it hits Ignis that Noctis might be subjected to the same fate by the same prophecy, and he begins to view this all with new perspective. The battle with Ardyn in which Ignis loses his sight happens quickly after that, but he has further time to reflect upon all of this during his recovery ( and Noctis’s subsequent recovery ).

When Ignis suggests to Noctis that they cease their journey, it isn’t because he hopes Noctis will actually agree and give up at Ignis’s suggestion. ( I’ve read compelling arguments questioning Ignis’s decision to not disclose the full implications of the prophecy to Noctis, and calling into question Ignis’s denial of Noctis’s agency in making this decision— which would be fairly valid if Ignis was expecting to Noctis to make a decision that would be better made fully informed, but I have never viewed this scene in this way, even before playing Episode Ignis and learning the full context of it. ) Rather, he is testing Noctis’s resolve to push forward at a time when Noctis might be tempted to give up due to the losses already incurred. Ignis is playing devil’s advocate in this scene, suggesting that it’s okay to quit now in order to help Noctis himself realize he finds that idea abhorrent, as opposed to telling Noctis that he has to push onward when he doesn’t want to ( as it could be said Gladio is doing in the train scene; this is a prime example of the different approaches of Gladio and Ignis, and I’d argue a prime example of how much better Ignis knows Noctis and his emotional needs than Gladio does ).

His decision to not tell Noctis about the full consequences of the prophecy is because he believes there is no stopping Noctis from what he has already decided to do, and Noctis’s impassioned conviction that the sacrifices of others made on his behalf must be honored by his own fulfillment of the very role they have sacrificed in order for him to perform convinces Ignis that Noctis does not want to be swayed from his course. If he tells Noctis that fulfilling his role as the Chosen King will mean his own death, then Noctis might be too afraid to continue and resent himself for it. Or, even if he continues, he would then need to do so with the knowledge of his impending death looming over him. Ignis makes a decision not unlike Regis’s decision to withhold his son’s fate from him in order to maximize his enjoyment of life in the meanwhile. It could be argued that this is presumptuous of Ignis ( and, for that matter, of Regis ), but all of his decisions are made based upon what he believes is best for Noctis.

( Even more under the cut ! )

Ignis also tells no one else of the nature of the prophecy until after Noctis is in the Crystal. After that, he keeps it to himself for a short while ( so that the others do not have to bear that burden as well ), but does eventually share what he knows with Gladio, Prompto, and other relevant parties.

Ignis does not know about Ardyn’s true identity before the others learn it, as that was only revealed in the AU ending of Episode Ignis ( which I only honor in my specific verse for it ), nor the additional reveals from Lunafreya about the ring and the Crystal. It might also be worth mentioning that while the AU ending alone is where Ignis says things like “ I don’t want to die without him ” and “ this world means nothing to me without Noctis ” and a host of other things that sound a lot like his feelings for Noctis go beyond leige and retainer, I do write him as though these feelings are present even in my main verse; he just never had that opportunity to voice them.

On the topic of Ignis’s religious faith ( and oops I drifted pretty far from my original goals of tying these two things together ): he, as well as the royal family and most of Lucis, observes the faith of the Six. For Ignis’s part, this is more or less a nominal observance of faith, as they do live in a world in which gods have a tangible and empirically observed presence and he of course respects these powerful Astrals, but he is far from devout as far as paying them actual, spiritual worship goes.

When Ignis learns of the full extent of the prophecy ( and comes to believe it ), his regard for the gods is worsened considerably. Indeed, he comes to resent and perhaps even hate them, for he perceives the gods as being the ones to cruelly demand Noctis’s life in exchange for world salvation. ( Whether or not this is true or the gods are simply the messengers and perhaps arbiters of a truism that is out of even their control, even I am unclear. ) In Ignis’s perception, they could rule differently but choose not to, and even if that is not the case, they have long been playing a game with divine forces in which humanity ( and particularly Noctis ) are their pawns. Ignis cannot abide by this, and refuses to pay them ( even nominal ) worship any longer.

His worldview does become ( pardon the unavoidable pun ) darker as a result of this, and it would not be unreasonable for others to assume that Ignis’s newfound bitterness and resentment of the gods are in response to his blindness rather than in response to Noctis’s fate ( especially before they know of Noctis’s fate ). The truth of it, though, is that while he is of course frustrated by his blindness and the extreme difficulty that is now posed in performing even basic tasks, he does not resent his blindness, as it was a sacrifice that he willingly made to save Noctis’s life ( even if only for a short time ), and would unflinchingly make the same choice again. ( Mind you, he does not know how things may have gone differently in alternate universes. )

Ignis spends the ten years of darkness attempting to find a way around the prophecy, acting directly in defiance of the gods and their decree. His primary lead is within the Tombs of the Kings, which he explores at first perhaps with Gladio and/or Prompto, perhaps with Umbra, perhaps with other friends and allies such as Aranea, and later ( when the boy is old enough ) with Talcott. They are looking for inscriptions regarding the prophecy written in Old Lucian, a dead language that Ignis is now ( with so many having been killed in the Fall of Insomnia and now the Starscourge ) the last person able to translate. Unfortunately, as Ignis cannot see, he is unable to do so, and attempts to teach Talcott the language. Talcott is an admirable student, Ignis is an admirable teacher, but his blindness and the time constraints prove to be too much, and they are not able to find any way to avert the prophecy before Noctis returns.

In the alternate verse in which he does not lose his sight, Ignis is able to translate these documents directly and they do find some sort of loophole disclosed therein. Tragically, then, it is his blindness that renders him unable to save Noctis in the end.