#all the fucking parodies

[onesidedradiostatic]

(mentioned post)

woah!! two very different variations, HAHA thank you

You Didn’t Know (Reprise)

(don’t mind me, just got inspired by a shitpost by @onesidedradiostatic (and their Anon) and turned it into angst…)

(also, it looks like @convolutedblasphemy beat me to it - well done btw - but I still wanted to give it a stab!)

Vox (yoinking the proof away): “Gimme that, Alastor, It’s not meant to be seen by you. Let’s move on, everyone, Figure out the best move that should, Improve our chances against the Angels’ threat!”

Alastor teleports behind him and counter-yoinks.

Alastor: “You want me to ignore that? No, not yet.”

Alastor examines the figurine closer, with a morbid fascination.

Lucifer, to Alastor: “It’s not as simple as you think, Not everything’s been spelled in ink.”

Vox lunges at Al angrily, flailing his arms as Alastor easily sidesteps him. Val catches him before he can fall.

Vox: “Leave it, Alastor!”

Valentino: “Careful, Voxy, keep a cool head.”

Vox pushes away from Val, gesturing towards Alastor.

Vox: “No! You never cared, did you?! You left, and it was like you were dead, Al/ /astor! We could’ve just gone our separate ways, but You left me here, with this internal blaze!”

Alastor: “I’m sure you wish it had been so, but there’s a lot that you don’t know!”

Vox: “You left before we could talk it out! Find a way we could still be friendly! But you blew your shot when you dropped off the block, Yeah, I’m so ‘sorry’ for being so petty!”

Alastor pulls Vox into a dance as they sing past each other.

Alastor/Vox: “No more questions to be posed,” / “There’s one question to be posed,” ”I hate you now, case closed” / “Though you are predisposed” “I try to forget that we were forever!” / “Why is this thing worth losing your temper?”

Vox breaks off and walks away, putting distance between them…

Vox: “I made the mistake once, Now I won’t be a chump! Decades of isolation await you,”

Velvette, concerned where this is going: “Vox?”

Vox: “No-one else will think to even date you!”

Alastor: “Wait-”

Vox turns around, realizing what he said.

Vox, who didn’t mean to spill: “Shit.”

Alastor (Aro 404): “What are you saying? Let me get this straight, When you begged me then, Down on your knees…?”

Valentino: “He didn’t know?!”

Velvette: “Whoops! Guess the cat’s out of the bag!

Alastor (through gritted teeth): “Oh, what a reveal!”

Vox: “Wait a sec here, Al, you didn’t know?”

Alastor begins slowly pacing towards Vox.

Alastor: “I thought you were bolder, as our friendship grew older!”

Vox, pained: “No!”

Alastor’s demon form begins to show as he slowly corners Vox.

Alastor: “You have to listen, My life here has just one mission, So it’s lucky I saved you, The anguish it takes to… Do what was required!”

Vox: “To think that I admired you, Al!”

Alastor breaks off, dismissing him with a wave of his hand, and starts walking away.

Alastor: “I don’t need your condescension, It’s not my fault you weren’t direct!”

Vox: “Was our relationship just manipulation? Oh, I was naive to expect you, to care beyond favors you’re repaying!”

Alastor: “Vox, what on earth are you saying? Love is not forever, your programs here are all lies, I’d have thought that seven years would give you enough time! Now I’ll leave you all to handle your foolish little scandal,”

Al gestures to the group, and casually drops the figurine in Lucifer’s hands as he brushes past.

Alastor, to Lucifer: “I’d recommend you stick to sculpting Anatidae.”

Alastor is engulfed by his shadow, and melts into a nearby radio. He emerges at Rosie’s place, ears drooping. The music takes on a softer style.

Alastor: “Rosie, dear, I have a problem.”

Rosie: “For you, Al, I’m all ears! Sit down here!”

Rosie gestures to her couch, on which she sits, and Alastor crumples.

Alastor: “Ugh! Apparently, my old pal Vox, Bought a commission, born from horrid thoughts… I gave him a piece of my mind, he Said ‘we were forever,’ and yet somehow I never…”

Rosie: “Oh. Yes, I see…”

Rosie brings Alastor in for a hug.

Alastor: “Why the fuck / Was I the last to know my old friend had a crush?”

As the music fades out, we see Alastor’s face buried in Rosie’s shoulder, partly obscured… Without a smile.

[nonebinary-leftbeef]

not to be dndads posting on main but uh. you ever think about the parallels between grant and francis? i think anthony really just likes playing guys with a fucked up relationship to violence

[armeniuslaurant]

watching the Kevin Can Fuck Himself sitcom portions and shaking my head the whole time so everybody on the internet knows I disagree

[onesidedradiostatic]

I'M GOING TO CRY??????? THIS IS AMAZINGKSKKLGGS

@onesidedradiostatic I’d say I’m sorry, but I’m not

@taxi-boi made lyrics for the respectless anons first, this is more about the general Sweater Discourse.

(i’m an amateur, temper your expectations. also he/him, if you please <3)

That dumbass sweater is red! I will not be gaslit! It’s fucking ribbed because it’s been knit! That’s just the lighting! That’s not fucking striping, And I am going to die on this hill!

You’ve got it twisted! I’m not the only one who sees it’s striped! Maybe you missed it But I’ve got all the picks of colour hues And the yellow goes with blue — And the cufflinks show it’s true! Look at this dumb fucking discourse! It might be smart if you changed course

Let me at the masses: But Vivzie is obsessed with straight-up stripes! I think op needs glasses… You’re killing me! I know I’m fucking right! Haven’t we had enough today? Is his jacket blue or a silver grey? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO The state of this dumb fucking discourse, That’s enough beating of this corpse

All these anons are just going to multiply, If you think it’s striped, you’re going on my DNI!

Oops! Did I strike a nerve? Cos when I brought out the Kankri ref Couldnae help but observe that his turtleneck was fucking red! Are you sure you’re not colourblind? Will season 2 even change your mind? Thanks to this dumb fucking discourse, We might get a high-res of this source If we get the fans out in full-force, Will Vivzie bring you closure? This bullshit’s over!

[sachermorte]

if you really want to know what kind of person I am, the last time I bought a birthday card the recipient was like "did you spray your fucking cologne on this" and I was like "and to think I'm not even hitting on you. it's just total force of habit. I honestly feel wrong if I DON'T do it"

[lesbinewren]

i think. that metaphors can definitely be flawed and it’s okay to discuss that but i think if you’re looking for something in a story (esp in sci-fi or fantasy) to be a perfect 1 to 1 version to something in real life you are. kinda missing the point

[witheredgardenparty]

Has anyone talked about how each member of the Genius Society represents the over reliance on the belief of intelligence but not the act of intelligence?

[onesidedradiostatic]

sigh. what has my life turned into

Respectless (reprise) /JOKE

(referenced ask)

respectless but they're debating about colours!?!?!

also I'm just gonna tackle this other ask together with this LMAO

(this is zestial anon apparently)

sure. anons randomly being kin assigned characters

[luck-of-the-drawings]

two wrongs WILL make a right! ive got another lease on life, and im using it well, who cares if this is all fucked up cause we're all GOING TO HELL! IM JUST WILLIAM WHO SHOULD BE DEAD, HAD TO FOLLOW THE THREAD, thought he was just chillin! now he is a villain! HES ALWAYS SUCH A BUMMER, HE WANTS TO TRUST HIS BROTHER WILLIAM IN A HALLWAY BY HIMSEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

[zebedeezing]

Really awful that this even needs to be a thought in my head at all but I’m dreading that if Liam Payne’s death is indeed a suicide, people will make it about ‘cancel culture’ and ‘mob mentality’ and whatever the fuck and dismiss and harass his ex and the women who’ve spoken out about his behaviour recently. Make no mistake regardless this death is shocking and tragic, but the internet is allergic to nuance, feel like its gonna get pissed away, all the allegations made ‘nought’ or excessive or all equates to harassment and bullying. It’s gonna become a talking point about fucking ‘wokeness’. Any victims who’ve stepped forward, they’re gonna hear ‘Didn’t you get your wish? You killed a man’. Jesus Christ.

[shinesurge]

I love webcomics as a concept absolutely to pieces but genuinely I'm fascinated by how much this medium seems to be almost corrosive to us working in it. I'm probably just looking at it too close because it's what's in front of me but I wonder if we really do have more weird drama than other indie art scenes just because like, a lot of us are already mentally ill, then comics is such a punishing medium itself that the usual amount of social tension that comes from posting art online is cranked even higher. As someone with one of the Scary Social Disorders, basically everything about the way the social media spheres for webcomics operate is triggering to me and I'm positive the only thing that kept me from becoming an internet star for the day (Bad) at some point was that I chose to quit socializing in dedicated comic spaces and get therapy years ago instead of trying to stay in the thick of it lmao. Not everybody ends up having to make such a black and white decision so most people just keep hanging out in the pot until it boils.

[starlightseraph]

“who, lord kinbote?” is my favourite line in the history of television.

[cinnabeat]

this is completely out of nowhere but i think i will be old and gray and it will be pkmn gen 79 and i will still be sitting there in my probable rocking chair saying "oh i cant wait until they make a pokemon special anime"

[harrowscore]

why are you, as an adult in 2024, still hung up on reylo. why are you still mocking the shippers. why do you believe yourself to be superior only because you dislike a stupid ship from a fucking space fairytale. girl (gnc) get a grip

[tccconfessions2hear]

THERE WAS A FUCKING ERIC HARRIS RP ACCOUNT THAT WAS GROOMING PEOPLE?? AND IVE NEVER HEARD OF THIS??

CONFESSION 69

[teatitty]

I made these tweets back in early January and guess what motherfuckers

I WAS FUCKING RIGHT