#all my college students good luck on y’all finals exam!

[dejwritesarchived]

goodnight, won’t be on tomorrow.

[babyboibucky]

Stages - Part 1

Pairing: AU!Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 1,072

Summary: Bucky slowly realizes that he wants to cross the line of friendship with you.

A/N: I started a new series and this is the result of listening to Lauv’s Feelings so y’all might want to listen to that. A good ‘ol classic friends to lovers trope...if they do end up together in the end lol

STAGES MASTERLIST || MAIN MASTERLIST

-

ONE: REALIZATION

Bucky was sure that it was just platonic, his friendship with you. Being friends since your ugliest days back in college, it wasn't that hard not to keep it platonic. You sported the most hideous haircut back then, wore braces that made you spit on Bucky's face whenever the two of you argued and you cursed like a motherfucking sailor.

There wasn’t even a hint of sweetness in your entire personality. Bucky literally cried to you out of fear when he almost failed a major and you merely laughed at him, called him a pussy for getting emotional over something so trivial and bought him a bucket of beer to make him feel better.

"She's totally not girlfriend material." Bucky used to tell everyone and you always agreed without even feeling offended.

Why would you be anyway? Getting attracted to Bucky never crossed your mind even though he didn't seem to have that awkward teenager phase, that lucky bastard. He was already good-looking with his piercing blue eyes and boyish grin that made every girl in the university swoon. Sure, he had some baby fat back then but his goddamn charm was undeniable.

Too bad it never worked on you.

You’ve seen how Bucky flirted, heard his cheesy pick-up lines over and over again and they just made you cringe. You almost wanted to throw up when Bucky shamelessly engaged in phone sex while he hung out at your dorm. Thank god he didn’t whip his dick out and jerked off while you studied, he just groaned and cursed into the phone, talked dirty to whoever it was he was talking to and boy was Bucky terrible at it.

“You want me to fuck you with my 8-inch dick?” Bucky grunted into the phone as he laid on your bed.

You rolled your eyes and slammed your laptop shut, deciding to continue reviewing somewhere else. You left your dorm but not without grabbing Bucky’s phone, interrupting him in the middle of his disgusting sex talk.

“8-inch dick? More like 8 inches divided by 4. Good luck sucking his micropenis, sis.”

“You fucking, bitch!”

The both of you knew each other very well too, a tad bit too much at that. You knew each other's deepest darkest secrets like that one time in sophomore year when Bucky had food poisoning during a test and had to swallow back his vomit again and again until he finished the exam. Or when you went on a blind date for the first time, sharted, and braved through the entire day with shit in your underwear.

You also knew he wasn't one to settle down and all the times that he did commit, he always ended up breaking the poor girl's heart. Bucky was also aware of your trust issues given your family history. Having witnessed your parents fall out of love and into resentment, you refused to believe in relationships.

“I heard you rejected Tyler. He isn’t so bad you know?” Bucky asked as he sat next to you in the library.

“You know I don’t do relationships, Buck.” you told him, leaning your face against your palm as you flipped through the pages of your handouts.

“I heard you dumped Dot.” you asked back. “I thought she was the one. I mean, you sorta changed when you started dating her. Thought you stopped using your dick to think.”

Bucky shrugged, “I got bored of it.” he responded.

You snorted and turned to him, “Guys like you are the reason why I don’t do relationships.”

“Yeah well, girls like you are the reason why I don’t do commitment.” he snapped back. “You’re too cynical, I mean c’mon. Have fun, suck a dick without attachments.” he said out loud, earning a chorus of shushes from the other students engrossed in their books.

You rolled your eyes at Bucky in embarrassment and started gathering your things, preparing to leave the library.

“I already did.”

“What the fuck?! When and whose dick did you suck?!”

“Shush!!!!!”

It was pretty clear that romance was out of the books between the two of you.

Bucky was sure that it was just platonic, his friendship with you. Until he slowly began to realize that maybe, just maybe...you might be girlfriend material after all.

-

As the years went by, Bucky started noticing the little changes in you in all aspects...and as a man, it was the physical changes that he started to notice first.

Sleepovers weren't unusual for the both of you, in fact, the both of you were comfortable letting each other stay the night at each other’s dorms. Junior year in college, Bucky decided to stay at your dorm to work on a project. You had just finished taking a bath when Bucky knocked on your door and almost choked on his own spit upon seeing you in a tight cami top and the tiniest pair of shorts.

It wasn’t really the first time you paraded around Bucky wearing such, but for some reason, he couldn’t get his eyes to look away from your chest that night because fuck, when did they get that perky? Bucky felt bad for sexualizing so he decided to go through your old pictures (you with the ugly-ass hair and braces) to rinse his brain and fortunately, it worked.

For a while, Bucky managed to ignore the physical changes you were going through. It didn't last long though, because right after graduation Bucky started to notice a lot of things about you. Your hair had grown longer and for some reason, Bucky found himself wanting to run his fingers through your locks. He loved the natural waves in your hair, sometimes he'd tug at them to annoy you but truth was, he just wanted an excuse to touch it.

You had your braces removed in senior year too but it wasn't until your graduation that Bucky noticed how it totally changed your smile. You were pretty insecure about your teeth and when you finally got them straightened out, you learned to smile more and with confidence. Bucky remembered your habit of covering your mouth with your hands whenever you laughed so when he first saw you laugh freely, he thought you looked the most beautiful.

Were the changes in you that blatant for Bucky to start noticing them or was he just paying more attention to you?

Bucky didn't know why. At least, not yet.

-

Everything Bucky Tag List:

@ddowii @jessou893 @hersilencedscreams 

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[pillow-anime-talk]

older girlfriend. {pt.1}

synopsis: You as older Karasuno’s boys girlfriend.

# tags: headcanons; current relationships; older!y/n; romance; lil bit of comedy; fluff; some kisses and hugs; sometimes reader is smol or has a babyface and because of this she doesn’t seems to be on 3rd year or studies; sfw

includes: female reader ft. daichi sawamura, koushi sugawara, asahi azumane, yuu nishinoya, ryuunosuke tanaka & chikara ennoshita {hq!!}

part two {click}

— DAICHI

↘ You looked at Google Maps again on your phone and then entered Karasuno High School, looking around carefully.

↘ You literally never were here, so you felt lost, but you decided to go into the school and ask someone for directions to the gym if it will be necessary.

↘ Thank God, you noticed three first years who were just leaving the big building. You greeted them and asked where you should go to meet the Karasuno volleyball team. You even corrected your hair, smiling sweetly.

↘ Needless to say, one of the boys got a nosebleed when he saw you and the other two blushed, pointing only to the direction of the side exit. After moving away from the three high school teenagers, you only managed to hear the quiet ‘Wasn’t she a student or something?’, but you didn’t have time to react to that apt remark.

↘ You finally got to the large gym, so you decided to go inside. You noticed that the team was in training, so the black-haired girl noticed you as first. She was a bit taller than you, but she also looked super lovely, so you smiled at her and greeted her, asking if you could wait for Daichi. The team manager nodded at you, blushing furiously as she realized you were a bit older than she was. (Kiyoko immediately recognized the school coat of arms on your jacket from the Women’s College she wanted to go too.)

↘ “OOOOH. WELCOME, WELCOME.” A low voice echoed in the gymnasium and you glanced at the boy with a shaved head who was running towards you with another a bit small teen. “ARE YOU A KIYOKO-SAN’S FRIEND?!”

↘ You didn’t know what was going on right now, so you said ‘No’ and immediately started looking for your boyfriend. Thank God, Daichi was already walking towards you, blushing as much as Kiyoko before.

↘ “Y/N? What are you doing here?” He smiled, scratching his neck and you shrugged.

↘ “I wanted to see your training. Surprise? I think.” You laughed softly as you walked over to him and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “After your training we can go get some food, my treat, Captain.”

↘ The rest of the team was shocked because a) Daichi had a girlfriend; b) An older girl; c) Super cute and tiny girlfriend who dominated him in two freaking seconds.

— KOUSHI

↘ Only the third years knew about Suga’s relationship with you, so the rest of the team didn’t know who you are when you approached to them during the Spring High National Tournament, asking they were are Karasuno High School team.

↘ Tanaka and Nishinoya had a nosebleed and fell in love with you at first sight, and the first years didn't know what to say. You literally couldn't get along with them. You were lost and you missed your lovely babyboy.

↘ “Umm, so... I guess I mistook the High Schools, I’m sorry.” You muttered awkwardly and was about to leave when the libero denied it and stopped you.

↘ “You’re not wrong, angel. How can we help you?” You laughed under your breath at his words, nodding.

↘ “So, thanks. I’m looking for Koushi. He’s on this team, right?”

↘ “Are you his little sister? Aww, you can call me Ryuu-senpai. I’ll be glad.” You literally saw little hearts flying above his head.

↘ “No. Not really.” You replied amused and suddenly felt a gentle tapping on your shoulder. You turned, look up and instantaneously smiled when you saw your two years younger boyfriend. You hug him tightly. “Koushi, baby.”

↘ “You didn’t have to come. After all, you have a lot of exams at the university.” He muttered, though his voice was so happy and he was so relieved that you are here with him.

↘ “U-university...” Tanaka began, feeling his cheeks turn redder and redder.

↘ “Hey, guys. She’s my girlfriend. Be nice to her! And show her some respect! She’s in the second year of studies.”

↘ The whole team (except for the whole third year) was impressed.

↘ On the other hand, you hugged the gray-haired boy even closely and informed him that he had to come to your house after the game because you wanted pizza and some kisses.

— ASAHI

↘ You’ve just escorted your boyfriend to his high school and you were going to say goodbye to him.

↘ Of course, you couldn’t leave him with the usual ‘bye-bye’, on the contrary. You gave him a full, literally public make-out session right outside the school gate. Your red-wine lipstick made a little mess on the tall volleyball player’s lips. Nothing new.

↘ “... I-I didn’t know that Azumane-san has a girlfriend.” Kageyama said softly and blushed hard, looking at orange-haired friend who looked at you closely.

↘ “She attend to our school? Hmm...” Hinata asked under his breath, but the lack of a Karasuno High School uniform was misleading. “I don’t think so...”

↘ “I didn’t think that senpai liked first years.” Tsukishima laughed as he walked past the two shorter boys with Yamaguchi. “It’s almost illegal, don’t y’all think? I don’t want to believe that any girl has likes someone who looks like a criminal.”

↘ “Hey, kids.” Daichi’s voice made the four juniors turn to him and Sugawara. “Y/N-san is older than all of us and actually is in her first year of college. You shouldn’t judge a book by its cover.” He smiled heartily as he patted them on the back. “Now go to school and better prepare yourself for a solid warm-up after your lessons thanks to this gossips.”

↘ “What? Captain, no!”

↘ At the same time, you informed your boyfriend that you would come to his training because your classes at the university that day were supposed to end sooner. (What an awkward situation for firsts years who apologized to you on knees for things who you literally don’t mind...)

— YUU

↘ It’s been a while since it became known that Nishinoya’s dating a girl. Of course, it was a shock to the whole Karasuno team, because no one suspected that... Noya would ever... have... a partner... 

↘ Anyway, yes. You’ve been with the boy for three months now, and the age difference between the two of you wasn’t a problem for you or him. Yuu thought that it’s was super hot and sexy, by the way. He also liked the fact that you are older than him and you can help him with his studies sometimes.

↘ But he loved even more the fact that you were three centimeters shorter than him anyway and your face was so sweet that he wanted to kiss you 24 hours per day. Through your babyface, the rest of the second years who first met you thought you were younger than all of them. What a surprise, you’re not.

↘ As I mentioned, you often helped Noya in math, contemporary literature and physic, especially when the sports competitions coincided with the exams. You wanted to prepare your boyfriend as much as possible so that he could continue playing with the team and be the best libero for them.

↘ Additionally, Yuu had the luxury of bringing him food or snacks often, and taking him to the roof to talk and cuddle with you.

↘ The boy literally lives his best life thanks to you.

— RYUUNOSUKE

↘ Literally your biggest and the most crazy fan.

↘ You thought he was a fanboy for Kiyoko? Girl... He could create a new religion for you, and I’m not kidding at this point.

↘ He didn’t have to hide you for a long time, because you two barely started dating, and he already told the whole team that he was date with a third year who makes the best bentos in whole school and who has the most beautiful smile in the world. #SIMP.

↘ Tanaka is by far the most protective boy you’ve ever met. The seventeen-year-old just feels the need to protect you all the time because he’s afraid of some third years will take you away from him. Spoiler: you’re not going anywhere.

↘ He loves to hold your hands and you always have to give him a ‘good luck kiss’ before training or a match.

↘ First years and Noya literally hate you two and are jealous like no one else.

↘ Nevertheless, Ryuunosuke isn’t going to calm down and he’s bragging about your photos and what you did on dates with him (leaving the spicy details to himself, of course).

— CHIKARA

↘ Your relationship with Ennoshita was very relaxed and full of love and support, especially when his tournament or your own college exams were coming.

↘ As a girl two years older, you often felt the need to spoil him and buy him various things; books, clothes, ties, new volleyball balls... Literally everything you associated with Chikara was bought and given to the boy shortly after.

↘ I don’t think I need to mention that you came to his every match, as long as it didn't interfere with your studies.

↘ The entire Karasuno team knew who you are and they literally called you the team mascot because of your pocket size, cute face and banners that you held on every game for your boyfriend.

↘ You’re a very hyped person who also feels like a seventeen-year-old’s biggest fangirl.

↘ Chikara is so beaming and thanks to you he smiles much more than normal.

↘ Anyway, brunet likes the fact that he has an older girlfriend who always attracts attention and is self-sufficient. On top of that, his biggest weak point is that he sees you in a jacket and high-heeled shoes.

[basicallywhiterice]

across the world (lucas wong, dong sicheng/winwin)

pairing: lucas x reader, sicheng/winwin x reader

genre: angst, fluff, flangst. friends to lovers, college!au, dancer!sicheng, relationships and heartbreak

summary:  You always thought a piece of your heart would belong to Sicheng, your first love, who ended things when he moved overseas. In the end, though, there’s nothing across the world except for a boy you used to know.

word count: 4.6k

warnings: cussing

a/n: see y’all next month for the last part, feel free to yell at me so i finish writing it sooner (p.s. peep the hamilton reference)

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

this can be read as a standalone, but is part 2 in the on top of the world series. crossposted on ao3 here!

CHARLOTTE, NC

Charlotte Douglas International Airport, 1:42 p.m.

“Is this goodbye?” Sicheng murmurs, hugging you tighter. You strain to hear him amidst the hustle and bustle of the airport.

“I guess it is.” He’s leaving for Korea, pursuing his ambitious dance dreams. You’re staying in the states and starting college soon. There’s no time for an international relationship in either of your lives.

It’s cruel, you think, that the heartbreak from your first love will have been so worth it, that you’d have to live through the “right person, wrong time” so soon.

You nod, once. “Ah. Well. Bye.”

“We’re really over? We’re—officially breaking up?”

The words cut like a knife, but you try to stay strong for Sicheng’s sake. “Yeah,” is all you can manage without breaking down. “I guess we are.”

“Okay.”

So this is how it ends, you think. “Go and conquer the dance world.”

“I will. I—I really love you. I’m gonna miss you.”

“I love you too, Sicheng. You should go.”

“Ok.” He hoists up his backpack and raises his suitcase handle. “I—goodbye.”

“Bye.”

He starts toward the security line after some initial hesitation, flanked by his parents on either side. Trailing behind right before stopping, he turns back one last time, waving a final farewell.

After he’s gone, Lucas pats you on the back, Giselle hugs you tighter, and Ningning lets you cry into her shoulder. It helps, and it just barely holds you together as your world falls apart.

Home, 11:49 a.m.

You feel hollow.

Exactly six weeks before you leave for college, Sicheng does a routine call in the sliver of free time he has, sandwiched between his classes for the day. You’re still struggling through your acceptance of the change that was bound to happen, spending your days with your friends while you still have time. Though you’ve thrown yourself into living without him, seeing his face feels like a punch in the gut.

Even though he’s across the world, you let yourself forget for a moment, but you can’t pretend any longer when he hangs up.

Today was supposed to be your three month anniversary.

You turn down Yangyang’s invitation to skateboard and cry into your pillow.

Today was supposed to be your three month anniversary, but all you’re left with is a broken heart that Sicheng still holds.

ATLANTA, GA, FRESHMAN YEAR

Turman Hall, 11 a.m.

“Hey. How’d you like your first week?”

You spit out your toothpaste, holding up a finger and motioning for him to wait as you rinse.

“It was okay,” you say. “I haven’t really made new friends yet. I’ve, uh, hung out with a few people though, and Lucas and Giselle are in some of my classes.” Some water droplets spray out from a splash of water, and you wince a little at how low the dorm’s sinks are.

“Have you talked to the people on your floor?”

“Yeah, they’re cool. I’m pretty happy here, I think I just need more time to get to know people better,” you shrug. “Anyways. How are you?”

“It’s going pretty well. Someone from New York joined earlier this week, so she’s kind of in the same boat as me, except she’s Korean.” He’s about to continue when he yawns, words growing incomprehensible.

“You should sleep soon. When are you getting up tomorrow?”

“Late enough. I probably should, though.”

“Then why’d you call? Go to sleep, Sicheng.”

“I wanted to see you, is that really a crime?” He yawns again. “Well then. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight.”

You know you’ll only get hurt in the long run, but that doesn’t stop you from texting him to set up another time to call once you know he’s asleep.

Turman Hall, 12:15 p.m.

Sicheng cancels a Facetime he scheduled earlier in the week, too tired to call after a grueling practice. It’s the first time he’s done so, and you knew he was going to get too busy for you eventually, but it still breaks your heart.

You’re staring at your laptop when a tidal wave of loneliness pulls you under. You miss Sicheng, but you also miss the rest of your high school friends, your parents, and the simplicity of life before college.

Just as you’re about to text him, Lucas calls you.

“Hey, what’s up?”

“Yooo,” he greets. “Are you still coming to the student center?”

“Yeah, I was about to head out. Why’d you call?”

“You weren’t responding.”

You pause, a wave of tears suddenly welling up. “Thank you, Lucas,” you say, voice steady enough to avoid suspicion. “I’ll be there in 10.”

“Yeah, see you then.”

The loneliness doesn’t fade, but it doesn’t weigh as heavily anymore.

Turman Hall, 7:14 p.m.

You’re pulling on your shoes, about to head out to meet with Winter at a nearby restaurant, when Sicheng calls you. After a bit of hesitation, you reason it won’t take long and pick up.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” Sicheng says, hair sweaty and face shining. “I’m on break right now. How are you?”

“I’m doing alright. Why’d you call?” you ask. He almost never calls during his breaks. “Isn’t it busy there?”

“I felt lonely,” he says, and you’re not sure why it hurts to hear that was the only reason. “Is anything interesting happening?”

“Uh.” It’s been a while since he last called, and you forget what you’ve told him already. “Well, Karina’s been encouraging me to rush next semester. I’m not sure if I want to do it, though.”

“That sounds really fun. You could meet some new people there.”

“Yeah, but it seems really time consuming, and I’ve made friends already. I just—”

“If you want to try it, I don’t see why not.”

“Yes, I just don’t know if I can handle it on top of my classes.”

“You need to decide what you want,” he says, and you blink, startled by his sudden outburst. Your first instinct is to apologize, but you have nothing to be sorry for, and you wonder if something major or stressful happened recently.

“I have been,” you mumble, trying not to sound defensive. “I declared my major last week, the joint bachelor’s and master’s thing here. I talked to my advisor about it and I’m trying to graduate in four years. I have a plan.”

“Oh.” He pauses, head tilting. “You didn’t tell me.”

“I wanted to tell you over call.”

“Ah. You should’ve said something.”

You just shrug, wanting to move on. “I’m excited. How are you, though? Why are you feeling lonely?” You know it’s pointless to ask when he only has a few minutes of free time, but you still want to give him an option to answer.

“I’m alright, getting busier now but—”

The door opens behind him, a dancer clad in black clothing walking on screen. They speak a string of Korean to which Sicheng nods, standing up and stretching his legs.

“Sorry, break’s up,” he says, face coming back into the frame as he bends down to pick up his phone. “Text you later?”

You’ve gotten used to it by now. “Okay. Good luck. Bye.”

His face is replaced first with your text history, and next with a black screen. You stare at it, wondering if he even loved you in the first place.

You don’t decide on an answer during the 15 minute walk to dinner, but when you meet Winter there, you find that there are better ways to fill your time.

Turman Hall, 11:15 p.m.

Your hands shake as you press the FaceTime button under Sicheng’s contact. As your phone rings, you set it down to wipe your palms on your pants.

After tonight, you’ve decided to cut Sicheng out of your life. The timing is less than ideal, but with exams just completed and an abundance of time to reflect, it’s the best you can do. All you want is one final call with him, and you’ll rip off the bandaid.

Sicheng answers quickly. He’s sitting at his desk, a pillow propped up between him and his chair. “Hey,” he says, waving. An easy smile hangs from his face, and he looks the most relaxed he’s been in months.

“Hey,” you breathe. “How are you?”

He eats lunch as you talk, almost making you regret your decision to distance yourself. Your resolve never crumbles like you thought it would, though, and you think your conviction signals the point of no return.

Tonight, you hang up first. It feels like you can breathe again when you press the ‘end call’ button, but your heart crushes under the weight of your lungs.

Turman Hall, 11:57 p.m.

“I’m moving on,” you say, resting your elbows on the windowsill and looking up toward the looming night sky. The moon hangs high above, its gentle glow drawing out everything you’ve been bottling up.

“I can’t wait for him to come back when he’s happy without me,” you tell the moon. “I need to live my life without him. Otherwise, it’s not fair to me, or him, or anyone who cares about me.”

A tear traces its way down your face, plopping down onto the ledge. “I used to love him. I don’t know if it’ll ever go away, but I know that someday, I’ll be able to look back at it as something in the past.”

The stars wink back at you, silently, and you wonder if the moon ever gets tired of orbiting the Earth.

CHARLOTTE, NC

Home, 7:09 p.m.

Sicheng texts you every day during the first week of winter break. Each time, you ignore him for hours before responding, and it feels horrible, but there’s no other way around it.

Today’s texts come when you’re sitting in your room with Giselle and Kun, waiting for the sugar cookie dough to chill in the fridge. He asks how you are, if you want to call in the pocket of free time he has right now and tell him more about your future plans. You stare at the messages on your lockscreen, waiting for your phone to turn off before limply tossing it on your bed.

“What’s going on?” Giselle asks eventually, pulling you out of your reverie.

“What?”

“Y/n,” she says, scooting closer. You look up from the miniature Christmas tree nestled in your lap, having fiddled with its flimsy branches to distract yourself from replying. “What’s wrong? Talk to us, we’re here for you.”

You glance over at Kun. “I can tell the rest of them not to come because Giselle and I got food poisoning or something, if you need to vent to us.” He pulls his phone out, ready to text Yangyang, Lucas, and Ningning at a moment’s notice.

You wonder how long they’ve known, even when you kept quiet and tried to shoulder your pain alone. Your phone’s ringing saves you from answering immediately, lighting up with an incoming Facetime from Sicheng, and it hurts not to pick up, but it would hurt even more if you did.

“He said he has 20 minutes to call,” you relay to Kun and Giselle dully, your cover blown. They share a sideways glance, but neither of them say anything. “Should I? I don’t even know if I want to talk to him, but y’all probably haven’t called him in a while.”

“Don’t think of us, think of what you want,” Giselle urges.

You nod, reaching for the phone again. It’s still ringing when you silence it, throwing it back on the bed.

“Yeah. That’s what I want.” And then you fall over onto Giselle’s lap, desperately wishing for the pain to end, and she holds you as you sob for the first time in a week. “He’s—it’s—different now, and—s’okay, b-but it’s…” you choke out before you start hiccuping.

The room is quiet as you cry, only the sounds of sniffling and gentle consoling present, as you shed a semester’s worth of tears. You start talking once you’re coherent enough, putting your heart on full display, and it’s cathartic. It’s cathartic to ugly cry, to retell your love story to two friends who love you deeply, to release of all the hurt and longing you’ve been holding onto just to remember how you and Sicheng were.

And when you’re done, letting go gives more room for hope to come in.

ATLANTA, GA

Waffle House, 1:01 a.m.

“What do you mean, of course you were gonna get a bid, you idiot,” you exclaim around a bite of waffles. “I can’t believe you’re a frat boy now.”

“I was worried! I thought that one dude hated me, remember?” Lucas grins. “And don’t worry, I’m not an official frat boy yet.”

“Don’t fucking get hazed when you pledge.”

He raises his hands, still holding a syrup-covered pancake piece speared onto his fork. “I won’t. Don’t fall into the whole ‘frat boys are dumb’ thing on me, now, I know how to look after myself.”

“I’m not, I’m just worried,” you sigh. “Just—stay safe, y’know?”

“Aw, you do care after all.”

“Shut up before I make you pay for your pancakes.”

He doesn’t shut up. “Anyways, enough about me. You don’t have to, uh, say anything, but are you—are you doing okay?”

You can’t tell if he’s talking about Sicheng or life in general, but you offer an honest answer to both. You’ll find out which one he’s referring to soon enough. “I’m doing better.”

“I can tell.”

You stare at him for a second too long, the harsh fluorescent lights glaring down, and you think that maybe Sicheng came into your life at exactly the right time.

Three truths arise at the exact same time: You don’t love Sicheng anymore. You’re happier without him. And you see the light at the end of the tunnel, the day quickly approaching when you are perfectly satisfied with what was, and have no grieving for what could have been.

Clairmont Road, 6:08 p.m.

When it arrives, it’s any other spring day. You’re sitting at a bus stop, scrolling through social media, helping Winter finalize the Airbnb booking for your upcoming spring break trip, and discussing your summer internship applications with Ten at the same time, when Giselle scrolls back up your feed.

“Isn’t that… Sicheng? He went viral?”

“Hm?” You glance down at a dance trend, the dancer vibing onscreen alongside a popular filter. Then your eyes land on the several hundred thousand likes beneath the video. “That’s him?” you finally realize. You haven’t kept up with his dance account in a few months, and it seems like you’ve missed out on a lot.

“Oh my god, he made it, didn’t he?”

“Holy shit. All because of a TikTok dance? That’s insane.”

You call Lucas over, and the three of you rewatch the video.

As you watch, you wait for your expression to fall again, for your heart to drop and your stomach to twist when you think about him, but nothing happens. And as you feel nothing but happiness for his success, the last scratch on your heart heals itself, and you smile.

Then the epiphany hits you: you and Sicheng may never talk, meet, or be okay with each other again, but it doesn’t matter. It hasn’t mattered for a while, not when your heart is bursting with love for your own life and stays silent for a boy who was once in it.

He’s in his own world—leaving you happier now that you’re done learning what you needed to from him, wiser and more content—and you’re in your own, taking over the world with only those you choose to share it with.

It’s solitary on top of the world, but it will never be lonely, not when you fight for everything you want and hold the people you love close to your heart.

You let go of Sicheng a long time ago.

ATLANTA, GA, SOPHOMORE YEAR

The Quad, 7:30 p.m.

The day Lucas asks you out is the day the flowers outside your window start to bloom.

“I really like you,” he says, his beaming expression matching yours, “and I was wondering if you’d like to go out? On a date with me?”

He’s awkward, but carries himself with confidence. His fidgeting hands give away the nervousness he tries to hide, but his grin catches your attention. There’s a lot of things you like about him, but you think his smile might be one of your favorites.

“I would love to.”

Main Street, 8:15 p.m.

By the time your three month anniversary with Lucas rolls around, you’ve started bringing down your heart’s defenses already. There’s no reason to keep them up: he doesn’t make you cry when you worry about the future, is never gone for long enough to make your heart ache. He’s safe, and you want to stop keeping him at arm’s distance.

And you’ll be okay. You’ve lived through one heartbreak already and emerged stronger than ever. And if your vulnerability with Lucas means it will heighten your next heartbreak, then it’ll be worth it a million times over.

You hand parts of your heart for him to hold, dropping your defenses day by day. This is the point of no return, and you choose to walk past it with Lucas by your side.

ATLANTA, GA, JUNIOR YEAR

The Quad, 10:22 p.m.

“I’m in love with you,” Lucas confesses. Grinning from ear to ear, he swings your clasped hands together, practically restraining himself from skipping down the park path. Your hand slips an inch before he catches it, oblivious to the sweat coating your palms inside your gloves.

The right words never come, and slowly, the smile melts off his face. “Baby?”

Your throat constricts as you swallow hard around your dry tongue.

“Baby, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said it before you were comfortable, I…”

“Lucas.” Pausing, you bring a shaky fist up to your mouth, covering the lower half of your face as you stall for time. “I… don’t know.”

Your hand slips out of his. “Oh.”

“Lucas, I love you very much. But there’s a difference. I… don’t know if I’m in love with you.” He stares at you, expression tight, and your stomach turns. “This doesn’t mean no. I really don’t know, but I do know that you make me happy. I wasn’t expecting this.”

“I thought I had been clear in how I felt.”

You wince, slightly. “I’m—”

“Don’t. Don’t apologize.” He swallows. “Can we please go back to the dorms? I’m not mad, and I don’t want you to feel bad, but I really need to be alone right now.”

“Can we work this out first?” you ask, panic settling into your voice.

“I don’t know if we can do that right now.” “Have—have you been open with me? About how you feel these past few months?”

“Can we at least try? I—” Your voice breaks, and you clench your jaw to ground yourself before continuing. “Of course I’ve been open. I made the choice to communicate everything I felt, I overcame my fear of heartbreak. Just because I’m not sure if I’m in love with you yet doesn’t mean I haven’t tried and cared.”

“I don’t—can we please go back? I need some time alone.”

“You can’t just walk away like that,” you say, voice shaking. “You—you’re not trying to solve this together.”

“I don’t know,” he says, and it hurts to hear when it’s all he says, but not as much as it hurt you to say.

“Lucas,” you say, and it feels horrible pleading for him to listen. “Please work this out with me. Show me that you’re choosing me, too.”

He stares at you, motionless. Your worry compounds when he stays there, heart ripping apart at the seams as you resign yourself to the fact that this is the beginning of the end. Jaw clenching, you let your tears trickle down your face, the frigid wind sending pricks of coldness down your face.

Then he steps closer, blurry silhouette growing bigger. You furiously wipe away your tears, wool gloves scratching at your cheeks, to get a good look at his expression, when he hesitantly reaches up for your hands.

“I’m sorry,” he says, slowly lowering your joined hands. “I know you’re hurt. I need you to trust me when I need some time to process this, and I know you want to work on this together, but I need to be alone first. Would you be okay with going back to your dorm, but staying in different rooms for a while so that I can still be close to you?”

It’s not okay—not if he’s giving up on solving it together. “You get the bathroom.”

“Deal.”

You don’t get the chance to tell him that night, for you fall asleep before he talks to you again.

His absence speaks for itself, and you think this might be the point of no return.

Woodruff Hall, 12:12 a.m.

Lucas gives up over winter break, and you want to blame him, but you’re too busy blaming yourself for breaking up with him to be angry.

“Why?” he demands, gaze cold. You look away.

“You knew this was coming,”

“You were the one who talked about choosing each other and working on our relationship.”

And you were the one who gave up first, you think, but you’re too tired to be bitter. “Lucas, I don’t think you can change my mind at this point.”

“Are you—is it because I’m in love with you?”

“Lucas, please, just go.”

“Did you ever love me?” You hate that you can’t comfort him the first time he cries in front of you.

“We can talk about this later, but please, I need to be alone right now.”

You start sobbing the moment he walks out the door.

The Quad, 11:32 p.m.

Were you in love with him?

Woodruff Hall, 1:57 a.m.

You were not in love with him.

Woodruff Hall, 11:29 a.m.

When Sicheng Facetimes you for the second time this year, you’re not expecting it. You certainly aren’t expecting the news he drops.

“You’re dating someone?” you ask as he blushes.

For a horrible moment, all you can think is what if what if what if before you blink, and then your guilt over your past evaporates.

“That’s awesome. What are they like?”

“She’s really cool. She joined the studio a year after I did and we started talking recently. It’s going really well.”

“I’m glad you’re happy.”

“Me too,” he grins. “How are you, though? Anything interesting happen?”

“Nah, I’m just pretty stressed,” you half-fib. “Just—life, you know?”

“I see. How are you and Lucas?”

A cross between a laugh and a sob rips out of your throat unexpectedly. “We—we broke up earlier this month.”

Sicheng goes still. “Oh, shit, I’m so sorry, I had no idea.”

“He—it’s—I’ll be okay. I trust myself enough to end up okay,” you babble. “It’s chill. It’ll be chill eventually.”

“Things will get better,” he agrees, “but you shouldn’t ignore how you feel right now. Are you alright? Wanna talk about it?”

You tell him an abridged version, one that’s probably still too personal for him, and he consoles you the best he can.

You still feel the finality when he hangs up, though, the sense of obligation he felt to inform you of his girlfriend obvious from the start. It’s an unspoken agreement that neither one of you will contact the other so as not to intrude on his new relationship, and you imagine it’ll be the last time he calls you this year.

And you’re okay with that—have been okay with it for years by now. Sicheng’s gone, not the one that got away, and you feel a deep peace settle in your bones.

One day, you’ll feel the same about Lucas, too, and that victory carries you through the week.

ATLANTA, GA, SENIOR YEAR

Oxford Road, 4:28 p.m.

“Hi, Lucas.”

He looks up from his laptop, pulling his textbook from the cafe table to make more room for you. “Hey, it’s good to see you again.”

The awkwardness you’ve been preparing for in your meeting never comes. “You too,” you say, pulling out a chair and sitting across from him. “How have you been?”

“I’m doing really well. How ‘bout you?”

“Me too. I’m glad you’re doing good. How’d that internship go, by the way?”

“Oh my god, it went great,” he recounts. “Ten told you how he was interning under a different department, right? And that he worked on the floor above mine?”

“He did. Did y’all see each other often? He didn’t really mention a lot other than how he got wasted with you.”

“Yeah. He’s less of a lightweight now, did you know? Anyways, I shared an apartment with a few guys, and one of them was from his hometown, and he was doing analytics as well and he mentioned that he had interned with you last summer. Do you remember a Hendery?”

“I remember him! Does he still have a bunch of questionable ties?”

“So many. We got him a Shrek tie that Ten ended up picking, and he wore it on the last day, it was great.”

You and Lucas are okay again.

You only realize that you never ordered a drink by the time you head out.

Executive Park, 10:42 p.m.

Sicheng calls for the first time in a year right when Winter leaves your college apartment for the last time. It’s not the last time you’ll see her before you move out, but it brings about a sense of finality.

“Hello?” you ask after a moment of silence.

“You’re still going to school in LA next year, right?”

“Hello?” Winter glances over, one hand on your doorknob, and you shake her head. Covering your phone, you mouth “I’m fine.” She doesn’t look convinced, but closes the door behind her anyways.

“Please,” he says, and his sense of urgency grabs your attention. “I’ll explain, but I need to know.”

“Yeah, I am. Why? What’s happening?”

“So. I might be moving there to teach at a dance studio.”

“You’re moving back?” you press. “Why? When? Which studio?”

“Millennium, sometime in the fall,” he says, loud chatter on his end briefly drowning out his words. “Shit—I don’t have a lot of time right now, but I got confirmation that I’ll be teaching there just now, and I—I remembered you were gonna be there, and, you know? Can we talk about this sometime later? I’m at the studio right now, I just—”

“Sicheng, that’s fine,” you say when you hear the talking in the background pick up again, worried that he’s missing out on a class or practice. “I’m proud of you for making it there. We’ll talk later?”

“Thank you, yeah, we should.”

You nod, not knowing what to do. “Bye.”

“Bye,” he says, and you hang up as soon as the syllable has left his mouth.

Sicheng’s moving back. He’s moving back, a stranger behind his familiar smile, and it’s difficult to think about meeting him when you’d assumed you’d never see him again.

Against the backdrop of surprise, your curiosity stands out the most. You wonder what kind of person he grew into—wonder if he ever found something besides dance to chase, what his most recent catchphrase is, how his girlfriend is doing, if he still listens to the SoundCloud rapper after he went into pop, how often he calls his parents—and you miss the ease of being able to ask him, no sour memories to impede even the simplest of conversations.

This is the price you have to pay, you suppose, for knowing you were meant to outgrow each other.

[fortheloveofspanglish]

Should You Do IB?  Advice from a former IB student

Hey y’all! I just logged into my old Tumblr from back before I started IB diploma and I thought it would be a good idea to do something I’ve always wanted to do: reflect on the pros and cons of IB and why I quit. Hopefully this helps any prospective students or first years :)

First off, I did full IB from fall 2018-late summer 2019. The year I was in IB was honestly one of the best years of my life. A week before I started my senior year, I had to quit due to health issues, but I still continued taking the max # of iB courses that my school would allow for non-diploma students.

Also, if you have any particular questions, I’d be happy to answer in the comments!

GOOD REASONS TO DO IB:

1. The community is amazing. Until IB, I had only made a handful of friends in high school. Suddenly, I had 20-30 close classmates that I got to get to know really well. By the end of senior year, I knew a bit about almost everyone. 

2. The academics are fun! Before IB, I had never felt really challenged by school except in math. Suddenly, you got to take all these cool classes. 

3. Going off that, IB is great for students who love group discussion and essay-based work. We wrote so many essays in high school that I could practically churn them out in my sleep.

4. It teaches you work ethic. Because you will have a lot of homework, you CANNOT coast and still pass. More than the material, this is probably the best thing I got from the program.

5. Whether or not it’s a good thing, your school will probably give you priority access to certain things. For example, our school got us library passes for the local university database, tickets to a TED talk, etc.

REASONS NOT TO DO IB:

1. The worst decision I’ve seen a lot of students make is going into IB because all your friends are in it. Please please please listen to your gut and don’t do this. You can always take a few classes or see your friends at lunch, in club activities, etc instead.

2. You have are prone to stress easily or have a lot of other activities outside of school. This is not to say that you can’t do IB with this, but if you have a lot of family responsibilities outside of school, a chronic illness, an anxiety disorder, etc. you need to put these factors into consideration and trust your gut for how much you can handle academically. If you do decide to do diploma, please don’t feel shy about asking for extra resources such as extended deadlines and school counselor visits. Many teachers will be flexible in my experience because they know your workload is really heavy.

3. You just want college credit. Not only do most IB courses take two years, you often have to score fairly high on exams with very nebulous/subjective criteria in order to get any college credit. Honestly, programs such as AP will give you SO many more credits.

4. You do better with memorizing facts or listening to lectures. While this varies depending on the course, in general, IB focuses on a concept-based style of learning. While this could be a fun challenge for some, it may be easier to take courses like AP if you tend to learn more by memorization.

HOW TO DECIDE IF YOU SHOULD DO IB:

If you've already thought about all of these factors, then I would recommend

1. making a list of pros and cons

2. talking to your academic advisors

to make your final decision. Good luck!

[vmstudies]

30+ things i learned in my first semester of college

Okay, so as a college freshman in her second semester, I wanted to write all this down before I forget it all or it becomes irrelevant. College is a trippy af time, especially for freshmen, and I know high schoolers are all freaking out trying to find what’s true and what’s not. So here’s what I learned my first semester of college, and some stuff I’m still learning.

Warning: this post is long af. 

disclaimer: I’m a nursing ROTC student so I’ve got like a million and one things on my plate at any given time, and I have a wake up call at 5:00am almost every day of the week, so if you have to/already do wake up early, this will be great for you.

1. Be patient. You’re going to have people around you doing all different things. You may not be going out, but your hall mates will. Learn to let go and let them be. Unless they’re screaming excessively in the hall at 3am. Then maybe say something.

2. Do all the extra credit you are offered. Most professors only have 3-4 exams and a final. At least 99% of mine so far have done that. Take what you can get and do everything to keep your grades up.

3. Time management is key. I personally suck at it, but I find ways. Unfortunately sometimes, for me, it means cutting sleep, which I would not recommend, especially if you’re waking up so early. But learn to manage your time the way that works for you.

4. Find a good pair of headphones. Some noise cancelling ones preferably. Those will become your best friends.

5. Coffee will be other your best friend. Even if you don’t drink it. I never had a single cup of coffee till first week of second semester. I drink a cup a day now.

6. Eat well. It doesn’t have to be a salad every meal, but find the healthiest options you can that you like. The Freshman 15 is real, and I gained it, but I’ve lost 10 pounds just by eating a portioned amount of each food group per day.

7. Exercise. This goes along with eating in preventing the Freshman 15, but it also helps with stress relief and focus among a million and one other health benefits.

8. Take chances. Nothing illegal and nothing that could jeopardize your health, grades, or future, but just remember that when a moment passes, you can never get it back.

9. You don’t have to be best friends, or even friends at all with your roommate. But make an effort to get along. My roommate and I learned very quickly that we were not going to be best friends like we thought, but we get along well enough, and that’s all that matters.

10. You’re probably not going to remain friends with all of your high school pals. Even the ones who go to school with you. I thought the group from my high school at my uni would be my best friends and now I only see them when my roommate brings them by.

11. Take a chance on everyone. You’d be surprised who could become the best friend you’ve ever had very quickly.

12. Colleges will want your living situations for next year very quickly. Don’t panic. Just get it done before rents go up.

13. Look for ways to contribute to your city. Volunteer at churches or food banks or homeless shelters or hospitals - wherever works best for you. You start to feel a part of a community when you give back to it.

14. Skipping class isn’t bad, but only when it’s done a few times. If you only show up for exams, you’re screwed, because there are things on the exam that won’t always be on the PowerPoints. TL;DR: show up to class.

15. Don’t drink after people. Mono runs rampant on college campuses, and it’s now airborne. Hand sanitizer is your third new best friend. 

16. Exam season isn’t that scary. As long as you’re maintaining your grades in a class, the finals should be okay. Should be.

17. Assuming you aren’t a commuter, if you have the ability to go home every weekend, don’t. The weekends are a time for you to hang out with friends and have fun at college. If you’re spending it at home, it’s not even worth it.

18. That being said, if you have the ability to go home “often” and you’re happy and comfortable at home, visit every once in a while. It’s good for the soul.

19. Many professors are there to complete research requirements. That being said, it doesn’t matter to them whether they’re good professors or not so long as they get their work done. That being said, you will have some shitty professors. Just work hard and beat them by beating their class.

20. You will have some professors who are, to put it nicely, absolute dicks. Again: beat them by beating their class. Ace that shit then never sign up for a class with them again.

21. Find the study style that suits you best. Rewriting notes is absolutely useless for me. This semester, my study style has become taking notes in notebooks in my dorm, and just having the PowerPoint up to add notes to the slides as my profs speak. It works.

22. Have someone in every class you can text and ask questions or study with. Cooperate to graduate, kids.

23. This one is huge. You will get homesick. It’s almost a total guarantee. It may not be immediate, but it will hit and it will hit hard. Don’t worry. Nobody’s freshman year is what they say it is. Yeah, you’ll find your group, but chances are you’ll spend the first semester drifting and asking if you’re the one person in the entire world who isn’t enjoying things. You’re not. We’re all in the same boat. Just keep drifting. You’ll find your group eventually. Who knows - they may be closer than you think.

24. Sororities and frats may seem like all that, but - at my university at least - while they’re huge here, they’re also a major pain in the ass. Rush for sororities was literal hell, and one girl I was talking to the other day said she lost 12 pounds in just that one week. Know what you’re getting into.

25. If you’re single and remain that way, don’t worry. There’s nothing wrong with you there either. People move at their own pace. My best friend has, like, 5 guys wanting to date her right now, and I have absolutely no one (that I know of). Don’t worry. Just keep doing what you’re doing. The right one will come eventually.

26. Know what you’re worth.

27. Get to class at least 5 minutes early. I’m always running to my 8:30 and it sucks.

28. 8:30 classes aren’t that bad. As someone who is most definitely not a morning person, I have yet to complain. It’s nice to get up and get going for the day.

29. 6:00pm classes suck. Mine ends at 7:15 and then I still have to go get dinner, which is in the opposite direction from my dorm, get back to my hall, shower, eat aforementioned dinner, do schoolwork and study, etc. It’s a pain.

30. Find something small you can do that makes you happy. For me, it’s Korean. I started teaching myself Korean halfway through last semester and I like to think I’m doing pretty well for someone self-taught. I also have a stack of notecards that hits the 26oz mark on my Nalgene. It’s kind of insane.

31. BUDGETING IS SO FREAKING IMPORTANT. I cannot stress this enough. And so is saving. If you get a paycheck or an allowance of any kind, put some of it away in savings every time you get paid, and try not to touch that savings money.

32. Be open to everyone else’s likes/dislikes/thoughts/feelings/opinions. You don’t have to agree or like it, but respect it. You’ll meet people who have all different hobbies, opinions, religious/political views. As long as they’re not out there preaching that we should all just kill each other or whatever, idk, respect it. Respect Dems if you’re a Republican; respect Republicans if you’re a Democrat. Respect Muslims and Jews and Christians/Catholics and Hindus and Buddhists and anything else you can think of. Respect.

33. Keep your dorm neat. Make your bed every day. Clean room=clean mind. Clean mind=better studying.

34. Do your laundry every week, y’all. Shit gets nasty.

35. Only bring what you need. If you find after 2-3 weeks you haven’t used it, send it home. Dorms are tiny. You need all the space you can get.

36. If you’re religious, find your religious community. It will be a great reprieve a few times a week. I was never overtly Catholic, and I’m still not, but it’s nice to get away for an hour a week. Plus after 5pm mass Sundays they feed us home-cooked food, and it’s freaking good. Take advantage of that.

37. Find a place on campus that reminds you of why you’re there when you have doubts or you’re feeling homesick. For me, it’s the first place I ever saw when I stepped on campus: the main lawn. It’s super relaxing and it’s a great reminder that I’m there to kick ass, get a degree, get a commission, and become the person I’m supposed to be in the process. It can also mean the difference between contemplation and a total breakdown. TL;DR: find a place that eases your mind.

That’s all I can think of right now, but if you have more that I missed, feel free to add on! Again, this is all from my own personal experience, and if you find that you don’t agree with one, okay. One size does not fit all. But this is just what I recommend. Have fun in college and good luck! Remember: YOU GOT THIS THING!

[almitvs-blog]

hey  y’all  it’s  kat !  this  is  my  little  ray  of  sunshine,  finley  seo !  we  can  definitely  plot  on  here  or  through  my  discord (  kat ✨#9443  ) .  also  big  big  BIG  apologies  for  not  posting  my  intro  until  now  ...  i  may  be  on  fall  break  but  that  studying  grind  for  the  exams  that  come  afterwards  just  make  me  wanna  S C R E A M !!  n  e  wayz .. let  me  stop  rambling  and  get  to  the  good  stuff ( partial  good  stuff  ..  my  brain  is  all  ..  mush  so  let’s  hope  i  make  some  sense )

(  im nayeon , cis female , she / her  ) who  is  that ?  oh ,  it’s  just  FINLEY  SEO .  the  TWENTY - FOUR  year  old  has  been  in  beauhart  for  TWO  YEARS  and  is  currently  a  PEDIATRICS  NURSE .  i’ve  heard  they  can  be  BENEVOLENT  and  CHARMING ,  but  also  STUBBORN  and  INDECISIVE .  maybe  that’s  why  their anthem  is  WICKED  GAMES  by  KIANA  LEDÉ  and  PASTEL  COLORED  SCRUBS ,  A  LARGE  ASSORTMENT  OF  FALL  SCENTED  CANDLES ,  and  A  POCKET  FULL  OF  DIFFERENT  COLORED  PENS  makes  me  think  of  them .

⋆ ° BASIC STATISTICS .

FULL  NAME :  finley seo NICKNAMES :  fin ,  finny ,  fi AGE :  twenty - four DATE  OF  BIRTH :  july 10, 1995 HOMETOWN :  boston ,  massachusetts ORIENTATIONS :  biromantic  and  bisexual OCCUPATION :  pediatrics  nurse  at  the  hospital ZODIAC  SIGNS :  cancer sun ,  sagittarius moon ,  and cancer  rising  ( we  LOVE  being  a  double  cancer ) HOGWARTS HOUSE :  hufflepuff  with  v e r y  tiny  hints  of  slytherin  tendencies MORAL ALIGNMENT :  chaotic  good 

⋆ ° AESTHETICS .

messy  french  braids ,  a  heavy  helping  of  parmesan  in  her  caesar  salad ,  a  pocket  full  of  different  colored  pens ,  several  framed  drawings  &  cards  from  her  patients ,  a  complete  collection  of  the  harry  potter  movies ,  a  jar  full  of  ticket  stubs  from  all  the  movies  she’s  seen ,  light  pink  colored  scrubs ,  lavender  lattes ,  a  jewelry  box  of  dainty  gold  necklaces ,  a  collection  of  platform  sandals  by  the  door  of  her  apartment

⋆ ° PERSONALITY .

BENEVOLENT :  probably  one  of  her  main  personality  traits .  goes  out  of  her  way  to  always  help  someone  no  matter  what  it  is  –  big  or  small ,  finley’s  the  girl  to  help  you  out .  she  spent  some  time  with  habitat  for  humanity  every  summer  since  she’s  entered  college .  that’s  why  nursing  was  the  best  choice  for  her ( although  she  did  consider  going  into  social  work for  some  time  during  her  third  year  in  college )

CHARMING :  fin’s  known  to  be  extremely  charming ,  especially  when  she  speaks  to  her  patients .  she  always  has  a  smile  on  her  face  and  likes  to  joke  along  with  her  coworkers .  consider  this  like  BIG  angel  energy , u  feel ?  whatever  it  takes  to  make  people  feel  comfortable  around  her .

STUBBORN :  she’s .. a  tough  cookie .  hates  being  told  what  to  do ? especially  if  she  was  already  going  to  do  something ,  and  you  tell  her  to  do  it  &  she  didn’t  like  how  it  was  said ? ha  ! good  luck  with  her  growl  and  unwillingness  to  do  it ( some  may  call  it  pettiness ,  but  she  does  what  she wants nonetheless )

INDECISIVE :  this  is  her  ..  most  annoying  trait :/  as  much  as  she  likes  to  pride  herself  in  knowing  what  she  wants ..  it  only  applies  to  like  long  term  things .  short  term ? y’all ,  good  luck  with  that .  you  ask  her  what  does  she  want  to  eat ?  give  her  like  ten  minutes  to  decide .  or  what  movie  to  go  see ?  just  pick  it  out  tbh .  save  yourself  the  headache .

⋆ ° BACKGROUND .

***DEATH TW, BLOOD TW***

grew  up  in  boston ,  massachusetts  and  raised  by  her  aunt  and  uncle .  her  mom  passed  away  a  few  hours  after  she  was  born  due  to  the  doctors  not  catching  her  internal  bleeding .

she  lived  a  relatively  normal  childhood  with  her  family ,  they  treated  her  like  she  was  their  own  daughter  and  her  cousins  didn’t  even treat  her  like  a  cousin .  she  was  a  seo  and  that  was  that . 

she  asked  about  her  mom  all  the  time  and  why  her  father  was  never  around .  her  uncle  refused  to  ever  talk  about  the  man  that  left  his  sister  to  fend  for  herself .  regardless  of  him  not  knowing  about  finley , it  was  better for  her  to  not  know  who  he  is .

her  parents  met  while  they  were  at  school  at  columbia  university  –  her  mother  studying  engineering  while  her  father  was  studying  business .  her  father  was  an  international  student  at  the  time ,  being  whisked  away  to  new  york  to  get  the  best  education  that  he  can  while  her  mother  was  there  on  scholarship .  it  was  a  whirlwind  relationship .  both  falling  hard  for  each  other  until  graduation  came  around  and  her  mother  found  out  who  her  boyfriend  really  was .

little  did  the  seos  know  that  he  is  at  the  forefront  of  the  company  that  his  father  passed  down  to  him  in  korea .  while  finley’s  mother  was  pregnant  with  her ,  she  knew  that  she  wasn’t  going  to  be  able  to  live  comfortably  with  her  boyfriend’s  family  breathing  down  her  neck .  they  were  the  type  of  family  to  avoid  scandal  at  all costs .  so  once  she  found  out  she  was  pregnant  with  his  child ,  she  ran  back  home  to  boston  where  her  brother  and  mother  still  lived

finley  being  stubborn ,  she  didn’t  know  when  to  stop  pursuing  knowing  more  about  her  father .  especially  when  she  entered  college ,  she  tried  to  find  out  more  about  her  father .  going  as  far  as  going  to  new  york  during  spring  break  to  speak  to  whatever  faculty  taught  her  mother .  all  she  had  was  a  picture  of  her  father .

fast  forward  to  now ,  finley  has  been  diligently  searching .  still  hoping  to  finally  be  able  to  find  her  father  and  see  what  went  wrong

⋆ ° RANDOM BITS .

she’s  left  handed !

actually  has  matching  tattoos  with  her  cousins  that  she  grew  up  with !!  they  have  little  stars  according  to  the  order  of  when  they  were  born ( finley  is  the  third  oldest  out of  five  ..  so  she  has  three  stars !  think  ..  dragon  ball  z  stars  minus  the  circle  aldfljldjg ) 

loves  loves  loves  fall .  all  things  fall !!!!!!!

doesn’t  see  the  hype  around  peanut  butter  and  why  people  eat  spoonfuls  of  it ??  primarily  because  of  her  cousin  having  a  peanut  allergy  so  she  was  never  inclined  to  have  it ?

but  will  gladly  eat  reese’s  puffs  for  breakfast  bc  it  hits  different

[aeroknot]

ok so in that last post, the story of contemporary artist stuart semple’s awe inspiring pettiness and the general blessing he is for mankind— in the tags of that post i started rambling, as i do, and it led me to this memory.

my little university had a pretty small art department, which had its ups and downs; mostly an Up for me, which was why i even transferred to this school: i wanted close relationships with the people shaping my skills. i was tired of anonymity in the schools i’d been before. so, i got my wish, and got especially close to three amazing professors. one of them was my chaperone on a big group month-long trip abroad that the school sponsors and plans etc etc. so, we knew each other well — i house sat and watched his dog for him a few times, even.

how could i tie this into the prev post about contemporary artists? ok well as i was mentioning in the tags, one of the downsides to a small art department was a restrictive class schedule, often with certain classes only offered in odd years or even years, or even potentially only Once Ever in any given students’ supposed four years attending. so as a transfer student let’s put it softly and say my freedom to choose my elective courses was A Little Bit Boned. it was all art, so it worked out, and i had a couple great exceptions made for me — another perk of knowing your professors so well: they trust your work ethic and collaborate with you when you ask for alternatives — but the ONE class i was bitter about was this professor’s contemporary art class. all the peers i was closest to and felt the most motivated by were in the class, with this favorite professor, learning about contemporary artists, which was a topic i never knew where to begin when trying to explore on my own.

so, sometimes a class of mine ran halfway into their class, and sometimes it let out early. so, to assuage my jealousy, i would crash the contemporary art class on occasion. that professor was so used to seeing me that if i didn’t make a fuss and convinced my fellow students to play it cool, i never seemed out of place. every visit, no matter how infrequent, just, “hey bambi!” “hi, tim!” — (bambi was the college nickname He had given me, btw, and i’m about 75% sure if i e-mailed him and he read my real name he wouldn’t know who i was and why i’m e-mailing.)

the day he realized i wasn’t actually supposed to be in the class was a test day. i sat in while he was reviewing some things, and he’d told everyone to give them some energy for the test he’d share about this really cool artist he’d been holding out on us right before the test. so he did, we oo’ed and aww’ed, and then he started passing the test around. i looked to my classmates, lazily saluted and said “well, that’s my cue. good luck y’all!” and as i started walking toward the door it was like his brain melted. he stared. he frowned. i slowed down to watch, prolonging an already tiny walk to the door as much as possible. i smiled and winked. everyone was looking between us quietly, biting their lips, yet no one could hold in laughter any longer when he said, “bambi, what are you doing? you’re not going to take your final exam...?” and then it Clicked ! and he was like, “you...! oh, get outta here!” through a reluctant open-mouthed smile.

so that’s the story how one of the professors closest to me didn’t realize until the Final Exam of his class that i was never supposed to be there

[haruki-ya]

random dumb self indulgent Akira school hc’s cause they in my head but i just need a place to put them down

these are basically my ideas of what the kids are like in school set in the film verse !

so just jumpin right into it but Kaneda has ADHD which is why he’s usually really hyphy and physically restless (honestly i feel like this is just high key canon). He’s never been v strong in school not because he’s unintelligent, it’s just the one teacher to twenty + student ratio doesn’t work for his specific way of processing and retaining new info. He’s very hands on and would benefit from more one on one teaching, or like a specific trade even, but by the time he reaches middle school he’s just so over feeling stupid and worthless in class that he develops this charmingly air headed persona and becomes the class clown instead of putting effort into something that he knows he won’t understand. it’s not until Kai comes along and, bless his soul, has the patience to sit down with Kaneda and help him with the work he struggles with that Kaneda realizes he’s not dumb and his brain is capable of making connections like other ppl and all he needed was someone willing to answer his stupid questions and get him back on track when his mind wandered to something else aside from classwork. he likes science and thinks space is cool as fuck. when asked what he wants to pursue in the future as a career path, he says astronaut (often interchanged with yakuza boss. none of the teachers find that funny.)  

Kai is a lil scholar, born and raised. Is often referred to as the human encyclopedia lol. Has a very good memory and is capable of adapting to specific teaching methods or just reworking the info so that it is easily understandable for him. I hc his mom as being a uni teacher of Classic Literature and Rhetoric, maybe with some side classes on Journalism or Literary Interpretation. His mom encouraged his curiosity and literary prowess at a young age and it helped him all around in school. he doesn’t really have to try hard, he’s one of those ppl who manages to float by without putting too much effort into the work, but he secretly likes a challenge (which is something he definitely doesn’t get at the disciplinary school) and kind of takes Kaneda under his wing as a side project of sorts to both help his friend and challenge himself by teaching the previously unteachable. it works out wonderfully for the both of them in the end (except for Yama who gets jealous of all the times Kai and Kaneda spend together after class)

Speaking of Yama tho, he’s actually dumb as a rock lmao sorry pal I just call it like I see it. He’s definitely the stereotypical “dumb jock”, super athletic and physically fit but like…not the brightest. Which he’s fine with, as long as he knows the basics he figures he’s set! and he is cause his plan was to get by passing grades, graduate, and go work for his dad at the family construction company straight outta school. Kaneda and Yama have that dumbass solidarity and love to mess around during class, but where Kaneda tries to get his shit done after the bell rings, Yama would rather just have his younger sister do the hw for him in exchange for doing chores. that too works out wonderfully for the two of them (Yama’s younger sister wants to be a doctor and benefits from the challenge of “advanced” coursework :)

Tetsuo is kind of caught somewhere in the middle. Tetsuo is also by no means unintelligent, but he finds it hard to focus in class with all the other kids talking constantly (is usually easily overstimulated and has general audio processing issues as well. more a visual/hands on learner similar to kaneda) and doesn’t work well under pressure. He definitely struggles in school but is too prideful to ask for help or even let anyone know he struggles. He has that attitude of “if I have a problem, I’ll work through it myself” even if he ends up getting so frustrated with his homework it moves him to tears and then to throwing his homework out the window. That on top of his general disinterest in most of the subject matter, and tendency to jump on the offensive when teachers try and help him, doesn’t bode well for his education. Kai tries to help him at one point, but even after being friends for a year he’s still too stubborn to admit defeat (especially when this is something he can finally be better at than Kaneda and subsequently lord it over him -lol tetsuo u asshole-). When Kaori enters the picture tho, bless her soul too, Tetsuo begrudgingly accepts her help with the subjects he struggles most with (lit and science. he’s surprisingly good at math!)

Kaori a smartie pants! duh! I hc her as taking advanced classes, maybe one or two college level classes in hs as well, which is why she lives in a dorm with other girls.That’s a requirement for the school she attends. She’s a freshman in her school, but has been taking honors and ap classes as long as she’s been able. Kaori gets that cream of the crop education: smaller classes, engaged students, Socratic seminars, field trips, political, psych/soc, environmental classes. Specific courses, teaching tactics, and subject matter the boys don’t get exposed to in public school. I feel like she would be interested in some kind of community work, or like something that she feels is impactful to both the individual and society as a whole. Maybe like a nurse or social worker? Some kind of nurturing job and ok yeah i know that’s kinda stereotypical but Kaori as a character is so sweet and selfless and nurturing I just feel like it would fit her character. I could picture her actively planning out a future for herself based upon her education…but she a freshie and doesn’t know what exactly she wants to do. She enjoys helping Tetsuo with his work, so maybe she could be a teacher too.

Kei, finally, would definitely be enrolled in college classes early on. Maybe even an early hs graduate. She’s sharp as a tack and too likes to be challenged academically/intellectually . Found high school to be too easy for her and applied for the Japanese equivalent of a CHSPE (california high school proficiency exam which is basically after completing all required hs classes with the required amount of credits, an exam which verifies ur high school proficiency for early graduation). Definitely would be interested in Socio-economics, political science, humanitarian and psychology courses. Possibly environmental science or evolutionary science. I bet she met Ryu through some of her classes and thus prompted the beginning of a beautiful totally platonic rebellious friendship. Maybe a semester or two into her courses, the government upheaval begins and many of her fellow students start talking about their unhappiness with the state of society and the government. This prompts a shift in both the attitude of the students and the attitude of the revolutionaries Kei has recently joined thanks to Ryu. There’s an opportunity to get the youth involved in the fight against the corrupt government and a possible dawning fascist future. Kei drops out of college shortly after inspiring students to organize protests (like that in the opening scene of the film ayeee) as both a battering ram and a distraction from the rebel’s plan to infiltrate the esper’s compound and kidnap Akira (lol good luck y’all).

this once again has been an unprompted ted x by yours truly. thanks that’s all folks.

[arushistudies-blog]

SAT study plan for anyone taking it this year

Okay listen up we’re gonna ACE the shit out of this SAT. I wanna help y’all achieve your goals and be the best student you can be. But this requires DISCIPLINE and MOTIVATION. If you’re like me and don’t get results without actually trying, this is for you. (Put under a keep reading because this long really long and kind of personal oops I promise there’s good information there) 

Sidenote: I only used khanacademy for this and found that it worked wonderfully for my needs. If you have test prep books or other things of that sort, I can’t speak for them but use whatever you think will help you the best, I just trusted khanacademy because it was actually partnered with collegeboard and figured that their practice questions would align to what I would actually see on test day. It’s totally free, which is a bonus!

Alright so my first attempt at the SAT was a 1440: 730 reading, 710 math. Some of you are probably thinking that that’s a good score, and you’re right, it’s not bad. But personally, I wanted to do better, and I wasn’t seeing enough improvement fast enough. I took the December 2017 SAT and March was my last chance because I was unable to take any SAT later than that, so I needed to improve FAST. The problem was that I didn’t do anything over winter break, and once school began again in January, I had to worry about 6 APs again. Not to mention, I had an important competition coming up in February so I basically did no SAT prep until mid-February. I had exactly one month for my score to go up, and maintain my grades.  So I quit my job for the time being, because mentally I couldn’t handle everything happening at once. That’s okay. Do what you need to do for your mental health. That is so so so important and I wish I had prioritised it more throughout my junior year. I started doing homework at lunch and trying to finish as fast as possible at home, so that I could maximise my allotted time for SAT prep. I would usually finish homework around 11 PM to midnight-ish. 

I focused my prep more towards math, because that was what I struggled more with. So what I did was I forced myself to do 50 questions of math concepts that I struggled with the most. Sounds doable, right? The catch was, I had to get all 50 right. If I missed one, I would have to restart my 50 question count and I wouldn’t let myself go to sleep until I had done so. 

I did prep for reading as well! I kind of followed the same thing as math, except I had to get 3 whole passages in a row right, otherwise I wasn’t allowed to sleep.

Every Friday and Saturday would be spent finishing my homework and getting as far ahead as possible for the next week. Every other Sunday, I would take a practice test, review, and every Sunday, I would spend the whole day dedicated to SAT prep. This got really unhealthy for me because obviously I wanted to get ahead, but the sheer amount of work I had from each class + the decreasing motivation I had as time went on and I got more and more burned out meant that I worked slower, and in order to get everything done, I would pull all nighters. Already, I was sleeping about 4-5 hours a day throughout the week, and while others were partying it up over the weekend, I was watching the sun rise and groaning because I still had work to do. If you feel like you’re overstressed, take a break. Do something you love. It doesn’t help anyone if you keep going but your heart isn’t in anything anymore, if you have no social life, if you can’t remember the last time you got a good night’s rest, if you can’t remember why you even want to go to a good college anymore. You come first. Always remember that. 

That’s what I did to see my score go up. Obviously you don’t have to be as extreme as this, but if you’re in a time crunch and really need your score to go up, I found this method to be extremely effective. Not being able to sleep until I was done was a really good incentive for me, but even if you don’t incorporate that element into your practice, it’s still a good idea to do a lot of practice. You’ll find that you get better and faster as time goes on. 

My final score was a 1550: 790 math (stupid circle question) and 760 reading. Obviously I should have done more reading practice than I did, but what’s done is done. A 1550+ was good enough for me and it’s certainly good enough for colleges, so I decided to focus my efforts elsewhere for the remainder of the year. Good luck to everyone this year! I know you’ll do great :) but no matter what your score is, remember that you are more than a test score, more than a GPA, more than what college you get into. Just try your best. Anyone freaking out about SAT, ACT, AP exams, whatever it may be, read this. 

[xviistudy]

Things to remember in Senior High

Well, it’s summer now and 11th grade is over. Next year I’ll be graduating High School, then I’ll be off to college. That being said, here’s everything I have learned from my first year in Senior High in a nutshell: 

#1: Don’t take sleep for granted 

When you hear your older sister/brother or your friends from the 11th and 12th grade telling you to sleep while you can, we actually mean it. The first quarter of the year is alright. There’s not much to do but when y’all really start to work, sleep is literally non-existent. Approximately, in a week, a student who strives for academic excellence will get at least 15-20 hours of sleep (since our school days range from Monday to Thursday and Friday is a free day, psyche it isn’t bc you still have to go back to school to finish whatever PTs and projects you have’t finished yet HAHAHAHHA). When the exams hit, it is what you literally call hell week since in the three days of the exam, I had approximately only had 8-10 hours of sleep. Imagine that? In three days. That’s why when we tell you to sleep, YOU SLEEP. It’s not fun being a coffee zombie all day, everyday. 

#2: Don’t take your mental health lightly 

I cannot tell you guys how many mental breakdowns I have had in this year. There was so much going on and it was so much. I went as far as telling myself that it was okay for me to faint/collapse, as long as I pass my exams. I would breakdown randomly in class for some apparent reason, I don’t remember it anymore. I would get so anxious and tired whenever I would think about all I had to do for that specific week and then proceed to have that breakdown. Please, my darlings, when it all gets too much, don’t push yourself if you can’t do it anymore. It will take a toll on your mental, physical and emotional health so much. You will regret it when the year is done, trust me. During the year, I repressed all my feelings bc I had to get all my work done in order to get a good grade. Now that it’s summer, I am an depressed, emotionally unstable and anxious mess bc all those repressed feelings are finally coming out. 

#3: Don’t forget to eat and stay hydrated

Coffee can only do so much. Don’t drink that like water just so that you can stay awake to do your homework. During the school year, I lost so much weight and that is not good. The weight I lost was due to stress and lack of food intake. The lack of food intake was caused by being too busy to even eat my lunch and we obviously couldn’t eat in class. So please, bring at least sandwiches and a huge waterjub so that you can eat and drink the water you need.

#4: Don’t put off your homework

This is a mistake I made frequently which caused me to stay up late since the deadline was already the next day. When the homework is given to you, do it on the day because the next day you will be given new assignments. This sounds standard but we still tend to do this because we rely on the fact that the deadline is still next week or next month. Don’t do that because the month will go by and the next thing you know, the deadline is already tomorrow. If you don’t understand, please ask for help from your classmates. That will help you finish faster rather than spending hours going over material that you don’t understand at all. On the other hand, if you’ve spent just 10-30 minutes reading and rereading the material, take a break and go back later. There’s a huge chance that your brain is too tired and you need to rest before it can function. After that rest, maybe to your surprise, you might understand the material. 

#5: Listen to your teacher

This is standard but you know when you get those days when you’re just out of it and you don’t listen nor copy the notes? Yeah, those days. No matter how out of it you are, you need to listen or else you will regret it. I suggest you listen rather than taking down notes because if you’re busy taking down notes, you might miss half of the lesson even if you did write it down because you might not even remember why you wrote it down or short cuts. If you can do both, then that would be great! If you’re the type to take down notes because you can understand it more, then go ahead! You do you, boo. If you’re being out of it is caused by your mental or emotional state, then please go to your guidance center. No matter how hard you try to listen nothing will happen because you’re not okay. 

#6: Surround yourself with people who make you happy

No joke, this is a big factor since when you’re surrounded with people who make you happy, then you will be somewhat happy if not completely happy. When you’re happy, you have the motivation to do your work because being happy gives you more energy. They will also make going to school easier since you’re looking forward to seeing these people. These people will also act as your support group. They will push you to do your best and push you to grab the opportunities that you’re to scared to do on your own. I swear, if you find the right people, no matter how stressful Senior High is, you will have the time of your life. 

#7: Get rid of the toxic people in your life

This is also a huge factor. If you still have toxic people in your life, get rid of them. All they’ll do is stress you out even more when there’s actually nothing to be stressed about. I started the year with a toxic person and it was hell. I felt like I was trapped and suffocated. I did not want to go to school and I did not feel wanted in school at all. All I was to this person was a personal slave. So when I decided to leave, this person got even more mad and gave my friends and I a harder time. You don’t need these kinds of people in your life at this point because you already have too much to worry about, you don’t need to add another one.This is why while it’s still early, get rid of them. To identify a toxic friend or relationship, click here. Click here to know how to deal with manipulative people. Click here to know the 10 differences between a toxic friend and a good friend. 

#8: Enjoy your time while it lasts

Enjoy all this while it lasts. You may not know it now but you will miss everything about whatever you have experienced in all your years in school. Next year, I will be graduating and I regret not spending enough time appreciating everything that I had when I was in the years prior. Appreciate your teachers, your friends,  your classmates, the lunch ladies/ janitors, the security guards you see and greet every morning and just anyone you see in your High School everyday because you will never find anyone like them in your new school for college. Appreciate how your school looks - the trees, the pathway, the parking lot, the classrooms, the canteen, the chapel - because you will miss the familiarity, how at home you felt in it, when you reach college. 

That’s all I have to say for what I’ve learned this year. I hope you guys enjoyed the read and took my advice into consideration! To all the graduates this year, congratulations! I am proud. Good luck on your next chapter in life. To the people who are still far off, enjoy it while it lasts. Graduation will be here quicker than you know it. To my batch, one more year and we will be off. I hate to admit it but I’ll miss you all. Curious and curiouser, it feels as if yesterday was the start of 7th grade. 

[blackgwenstacy]

‘tis the season (to be merry)

[shows up five days late with starbucks and a gay fanfic] hey y’all merry chrysler

Happy holidays to @connorstolll !! I was your secret santa for @pjosecretsanta2k17. I hope you enjoy your Solangelo college au <3

word count: 2,200

summary: Will Solace is a little in love with his roommate, and holiday party shenanigans only confirm that he’s a lot in love with his roommate.

warnings: alcohol use, a few f-bombs, and STEM major roasts

There’s a certain feeling one gets after taking their very last final of the semester. A freeing feeling, like the entire world has been lifted off their shoulders and each anxiety-ridden thought suddenly flees from their mind.

Will hasn’t felt this relieved since before the semester started. After those stressful weeks, he wants nothing more than to spend his break sleeping, eating, and binge watching Netflix.

And pining after his roommate. His dorky, adorable, oblivious ass roommate.

Will’s had somewhat of a crush on his college roommate, Nico di Angelo, for the past six months. They’ve roomed together for a year now, but it took some time for Will not to be intimidated by Nico’s dark features, brooding expression, and his infinite knowledge on the secrets of the universe.

Once Will had grown used to all of that, however, boy was he gone.

It’s not like Nico seemed to notice any difference in the way Will was acting toward him. It was quite ironic to Will, especially because Nico was the one who  loved to rip characters apart and analyze their every word and action. Watching any movie with Nico was one hell of a psychoanalysis.

Then again, Will could be a bit more. . . expressive about his affections. But it’s not like he was letting every opportunity to admit how he feels slip through his fingers, allowing himself to suffer in silence.

(That was exactly what he was doing.)

“Hey,” he calls out upon entering his dorm, stuffing his lanyard into his backpack and tossing it at the foot of his bed. As much as he’d like to sleep forever, he told Travis he would attend he and his brother’s party tonight, so he ought to get ready for that. 

“Hey,” Nico responds. He’s in bed, occupied with a rather thick looking book, an empty mug of coffee resting on the nightstand next to him. Will frowns, already knowing Nico was hardly going to pay him any attention, hyper focused on whatever literature he was studying. “How was the Physics exam?”

“Physiology. Anatomy and Physiology.”

“That’s not the same thing?”

“I’m just glad it’s over.” Will plops onto the stiff mattress of his dormitory bed, removing his boots and peeling off his socks. “I thought you were finished with assignments?”

Nico doesn’t look up from the book. “I am.”

“Then why are you reading—” Will gets up, crosses the short distance between their beds and bends over slightly to glance at the book cover, “—Canterbury Tales?”

Nico still doesn’t pay Will any mind, adjusting his thick-rimmed glasses. Will struggles to ignore how adorable Nico looks with them on. “I’m taking English Lit next semester— ”

“Oh my god.”

“Did you know J.K. Rowling got inspiration for the Tale of the Three Brothers from the Pardoner’s Tale?”

Will did not know that, and actually thinks it’s pretty cool, but he’s still in disbelief of the fact that Nico was still studying, even after all of his finals.

“Aren’t you tired of reading?”

“Me, the English major, tired of reading? Preposterous.”

“Don’t you want to do something fun?”

Nico drops the heavy book in his lap, taking on a defensive tone. “I think literature is very fun, thank you.”

“Okay,” says Will, “and action potentials are as great as Disney World to me, but even I want nothing to do with them after talking all those exams.”

“You, the STEM major, want nothing to do with action potentials?”

Will chokes back his laugh. He want’s Nico to take him seriously, his sarcasm be damned.

“Take a break, man.” 

Nico frowns, taking off his glasses, and Will tries not to look disappointed.

“I don’t know,” Nico sighs. He crawls across his bed and shoves Canterbury Tales into his overflowing bookshelf kept at the foot of it. “It feels weird. Like, I keep thinking there’s something I should be doing.”

“What you should be doing,” Will starts, “is rewarding yourself for surviving Hell Week.” He drops the bomb. “The Stolls are having a holiday party tonight. You should come with me.“

Nico looks the opposite of intrigued. “No, thanks.”

“Come on, Nico,” Will stresses, “You haven’t left the residence hall in two weeks. You’ve only left this dorm room to take your finals.”

“I think having to evacuate last week because Leo started a fire in the communal kitchen counts as me leaving the residence hall.”

Will rolls his eyes. He knows Nico doesn’t have much of a party personality, but some of Nico’s friends would be there. It would be good to catch up with them and get some human interaction.

“It’ll be crowded, and noisy,” Nico objects. “Did you know noise is one of life’s most common stressors?”

Will hums, and quips, “So is loneliness.”

Nico glares at him. “You know, when I decided not to request a different roommate next semester, it’s because I thought there wasn’t any way you could possibly get more irritating.”

Will ignores the jab. “Are you sure it’s not because you love me?”

Nico amusedly raises one of his eyebrows.

“Fine,” Will relents. “I’ll go by myself. Alone. Even though loneliness is one of life’s most common stressors—“

“You are the biggest Drama Queen,” says Nico.

“Says you.“

Nico rolls his eyes, standing up. “Fine, I’ll go. But not for long, I’m already mentally exhausted.”

“Okay, cool,” Will says calmly, though on the inside he was dancing on flowers and rainbows. He gathers up his toiletries and his towel. “We’d better shower. It starts at seven.”

“You better not use my fucking stall, Solace, I swear to god.”

Will doesn’t know what he was expecting when Nico agreed to go to the Stoll’s party with him. Perhaps he thought Nico would spend the whole time sitting quietly, keeping to himself and counting the minutes until it would be over. Maybe he thought the festive atmosphere would warm Nico’s heart like his smile did to Will’s cheeks, and he would confess his love to Will after the two shared a cliche kiss under the mistletoe.

Whatever he was expecting, it definitely wasn’t this.

“And since we’ve no place to goooo, let it snow, let it snow, let it snow,” Nico sings, or slurs rather, along with Dean Martin’s suave voice. His face falls. “I can’t believe Jon Snow died.”

“He came back,” Will reminds him.

Nico’s face lights up, and so does Will’s heart. “Woah, you’re right.”

They sit next to each other on a raggedy green sofa in the Stoll’s apartment. There’s music playing in the background, the playlist going back and forth between traditional Christmas songs and whatever’s on the Hot 100 this week. There’s a few dozen people that are here, most of them Will knew by association. They’ve only been here an hour and Nico’s on his third cup of eggnog.

“I’ve been thinking,“ Nico starts, “when I was a kid they made us pick grass and put it in a box under the tree for the camels to eat on Three Kings Day and when I was a kid I didn’t question it but now I’m not a kid and camels don’t eat grass. Wait—do they?”

Will isn’t sure if he’s amused or concerned by how many conjunctions Nico just used in one sentence. Nico has a conniption every time Will uses a comma in an unnecessary place when they text.

“—They live in the desert. There’s no grass in the desert. Wait—is there?”

Nico doesn’t indulge in alcohol very often. Not that Will has ever seen, at least. He wonders if he usually sings Christmas carols and talks about camels when he’s drunk.

He watches as Nico scowls and peers curiously into his red cup. “I think there’s something in this eggnog.”

“Yes. Rum. I told you that before you drank it.”

Nico’s eyebrows raise, far enough for his bangs to hide them, blinks with wide eyes. “Oh shit.”

Then he shrugs, and downs the rest of the spiked drink. Unbelievable.

Will snorts. “You’re going to regret that.”

Nico grins mischievously. “Me, the college student with an existential crisis, having regrets?” he says, looking about the room. His eyebrows fly into his hair again. “Does Percy have samosas?”

Nico stumbles to his feet, and disregards Will as he chases down Percy for some of his samosas.

Well, at least Nico wasn’t miserable, Will thinks. He was enjoying himself, sort of. This could’ve been worse.

Will sits through a horribly rehearsed, yet hilariously iconic Mean Girl’s Jingle Bell Rock reenactment by Leo, Piper, Percy, and Jason, and a marshmallow eating contest between Cecil and Lou Ellen. It’s been twenty minutes and Nico still hasn’t returned. Will hopes he’s not throwing up eggnog and samosas in the bathroom right now.

He waits five more minutes before getting up to go look, passing a couple passionately making out under the mistletoe in the hallway. He checks the bathroom, which happens to be empty, and unwillingly checks the two bedrooms, which are not so empty. He hopes the Stolls change their sheets before they crash later.

Having no luck thus far, Will ventures into the kitchen. Maybe Nico’s judgement wasn’t totally impaired and he decided to find some water to flush his system. Or he was looking for more eggnog.

“Hey, Will,” a familiar voice says. Connor Stoll, sitting atop the kitchen island, grins down at him. He has a red solo cup in one hand, the other rests around the shoulders of his boyfriend, Mitchell. He raises his cup. “Eggnog?”

Will shakes his head. “I’m good.”

“DD?” Mitchell asks.

“Well, I guess so now.”

Mitchell raises a pierced eyebrow.

“I came with Nico. He’s kind of tipsy.”

“It’s Grandma Stoll’s famous holiday eggnog,” says Connor, raising his cup in praise. “Pure fuel.”

“Hey, have either of you seen him? I’ve been looking for him for half an hour—“

“Found him,” Mitchell smirks, pointing with his cup. Next to him Connor bursts out in rambunctious laughter.

“Oh, yeah, he’s feeling merry, all right!”

Will spins around, and — Oh. Oh.

Nico was dancing rather uncoordinatedly in the middle of the living room, surrounded by a dozen people, an Ariana Grande song blaring from the speakers. Everyone whoops as the dark-haired boy gyrates his hips on an offbeat.

Will lets out a bark of laughter, unbelieving of what he was witnessing.

“Strip tease!” a voice that sounds suspiciously like Leo yells.

Nico smirks at the suggestion, but doesn’t move to take off his clothing. That is, until, he catches Will’s eye in the crowd of people.

He sends Will a wink, and begins to pull off his sweater. Will can feel his stomach flip, his face heating up.

There are hoots and hollers, and people scramble to pull out their phones. It only seems to egg Nico on more. Will thinks there’s a bit too much liquid courage pumping through his veins.

He. . . should probably stop this. Nico would be mortified in the morning if Will let him give all their classmates a drunken strip-tease.

Nico’s stripping doesn’t advance very far, however, because his sweater promptly gets stuck over his head. Everyone roars with laughter, Nico’s giggles muffled by the knitted fabric.

Will grows anxious at all the phones recording tonight’s events. There was no way Nico wanted to be the center of everyone’s social media attention. He pushes his way through the crowd, grabbing at Nico. “O-kay!”

He pulls the drunken man away from the limelight, into a less crowded hallway.

Nico speaks from inside his sweater. “Will, is that you?”

“Yes.”

“I’m stuck.”

Will laughs fondly. “I see that. Here.”

Will helps Nico pull his sweater back down. Nico huffs and ruffles his hair, looking flustered.

“I think,” says Will, fixing Nico’s bird nest hair, “you’ve had too much eggnog.”

Nico hiccups in response.

“We should probably go back to the residence hall,” Will suggests, and Nico nods exaggeratedly in agreement.  His brown eyes catch on something above them.

“What?” Will asks, and follows Nico’s eyes. Oh.

A mistletoe, in all it’s holly jolly glory, hangs mockingly right above them.

Yeah, they’re not doing that.

“That’s so cliche,” Nico comments, squinting at the fake branch.

“I agree,” says Will. He grabs Nico by the shoulders, spins him around so he can guide him. “Let’s go.”

It took nearly an hour to get Nico back to their dorm. Will struggled with guiding the stumbling man all the way to his car, then had to drive slower than usual due to Nico’s complaints of motion sickness. And as much as he adored Nico, he would still kick his ass for throwing up eggnog and samosas inside of his car.

“Oh, you are going to hate me tomorrow,” Will says to Nico, tapping through the stories on his Snapchat feed. There were various clips of Nico’s clumsy performance tonight. Hysterical as it was, Will felt slightly embarrassed for him.

Nico looks over from where Will had tucked him into his bed. “Enough to change my roommate request?”

Will laughs at Nico for the hundredth time tonight. “I hope not.”

“It’s okay,” Nico yawns before continuing, “you’re a STEM major and I still haven’t requested a new roommate. You could be in league with the First Order and I still wouldn’t request a new roommate.”

Will snorts. He wasn’t sure how Nico could be intoxicated and still manage to be a fucking nerd.

Will puts his phone to sleep, setting it down on his nightstand. He turns in his bed to face Nico. “Why’s that?”

“You said it yourself,” says Nico. Will stares at him for a long time, not quite sure what he meant. Nico smiles at him, and turns in his bed. “Merry Christmas, Will.”

Christmas wasn’t for another week. Nonetheless, Will smiles fondly, and turns off his lamp. He lies down and indulges in the butterflies that warm his stomach. They match the fluttering of his heart.

“Merry Christmas, Nico.”

the Ariana Grande song Nico was dancing to was Wit It This Christmas LMAO

[itheejn]

RFA + SAERAN + V + VANDERWOOD HELPING MC WITH SCHOOL WORK (mc is a college student)

ZEN:

Would come home from a busy day of rehearsals to see you crying on the floor

“uh- Mc? WHATS WRONG?!”

freaks out

“i’m just stressed i can’t finish this essay!”

well shit he isn’t good at writing essays

“well i can’t be of much help mc. Wanna go to the library?”

carries your backpack to the nearest library where MC somehow manages to finish the essay in 2 hours

“I’m so proud of you! You did it! Don’t stop going to school please.”

Yoosung:

y’all are on the same boat lmao

You both are so exhausted

once yoosungs final exams were done it was your turn to take yours and you were stressing over a final review

“YOOSUNG I JUST CANT ANYMORE!”

yoosung would care for you so much kdkdkdkdkd

“MC please make sure you also eat and sleep well please.”

would visit your house 24/7 to make sure you were balancing studying and resting

“We can do this MC!”

His encouragement motivated you

he would cook for you

“See MC! I told you you’d pass the class.”

Jaehee

she would notice your fatigue right away

“MC? do you need a cup of coffee?”

would have you take a break from doing your homework

“I’m doing this essay and it’s very difficult.”

“Oh i remember doing those for Mr. Han.”

Would be very helpful

Teaches you better than your professor someone give this woman a teaching degree

When you would fall asleep while typing an essay she would finish writing it for you meanwhile you rested

Jaehee is a very smart woman she knew almost everything about everything and if she didn’t she would make sure to find out

Jumin

“MC are you alright? Did the food upset your stomach?”

You would lay on the floor to cope with the stress

“No Jumin it’s just school work it’s so stressful!”

Jumin would hire the best tutors in the country perhaps the world for you

“Jumin are you good at math?”

would try his best

would really try his best

looked at Elizabeth when you asked a really difficult question that he didn’t know the answer to

Seven

this man is smart tf

he takes it as a joke at first when you cry over your homework but gets serious when he sees how frustrated you are

“hey it’s ok mc, here let me help.”

would explain things so clearly somehow

he’s good at math

“good mc! you’re getting the concept!”

gives you a “treat” for every question you get right

“see not that hard right?”

Saeran

this man knows a lot but acts like he doesn’t

“hey ray i need help with some school work.”

“i don’t have time for that MC”

would help once he saw how desperate you were.

“okay so you do this first then this.”

would just take your homework away from you when you got too stressed over it

would do your homework sometimes

“Saeran? Did you do my homework?”

“.....no.”

V

really good at explaining things

doesn’t know shit when asked on the spot

“uhh yeah i know how to do it i just forgot how to.”

would try to remember and ended up taking a nap with you

“MC THE HOMEWORK!”

google is his best friend when asked things he doesn’t have knowledge about

“MC if you ever need a tutor I can ask Jumin to get you one.”

Vanderwood

hates being bothered

makes an exception when he sees you banging your head against the wall

“god damn it MC don’t be so violent.”

you end up falling asleep on his lap because his voice soothes you to sleep

secretly finishes all your homework and puts you to bed

hacked into the school system to make you get automatic A’s

“Vanderwood...did you hack into the system?”

“.....no.”

a very smart man

schools stressing. me out guys i can’t take it anymore UGH

Also sorry for not posting a headcanon in like 2 weeks high school is rough man

feel free to request headcanons!good luck to everyone at school and if you don’t have school -_- still have a good day lol

[bolbianddolanhouse]

BNHA self insert AU [Book 2]

Beginning of Book 2 Read here to catch up!

Chapter 13: Did Y’all Try The Chicken?

Time flies when you’re in love~ but how do I even begin? Right before the end of summer break, I got all my memories back! The first thing I did that day was hang Toei off the ceiling fan in the commons room by his underwear, then switching that bitch on. Hoshi and I kept our relationship lowkey but then we got caught giving each other a good luck kiss right before the physical final. Luckily everyone was approving of us but they were upset that we didn’t say anything about it for months. The school board approved extracurriculars in hero schools! So our circle can do our thing in a safer environment! We went to the school dance this time around in matching attire that I made myself. Toei got sent to general ED because he failed the exams to stay in the hero program. But we got 3 students from their program in exchange and they’re pretty cool. I attended graduation to see Maru and Elise graduate, I’m very proud of them making their childhood dreams come true. They’re still together too! That makes me very excited to graduate alongside my love too.

Right now, it’s our 3rd year at UA, Mid February. My mom’s birthday passed and it was celebrated with all of us going to this Dim Sum place. Love is in the air but my mind is on post-UA plans...

“Hey what are you up too?” I asked Hoshi, who was scribbling away on some documents.

“I’m applying to some accredited programs” He responded “I talked to Loud Man and he gave me the proper paperwork to start applying for a teaching credential.”

“Oh! You’re going along with your first choice?” I was surprised, we talked about career pathways before the end of 2nd year and Teaching/Coaching was one of his top 3 choices.

“Yup, because full offense to Mineta sensei, I’d want a hero with a degree to teach the next generation of heroes” Hoshi shaded “But what about you?”

“Well, I have a guaranteed spot at my uncle’s agency” I sighed “I could go to college, Waseda would gladly take me in. But I don’t know! My heart is telling me to go back to performing.” I pouted as I rested my chin on his shoulder “I imagined myself going to the dance academy in Shibuya or play with the big leagues in Amsterdam!”

“Doesn’t hurt to apply” He encouraged “What’s the real loss if they reject you? You have two other things to fall back on.”

And that started my application journey, any time I had was spent on researching and applying. I didn’t tell my parents this though, I want to show them that I am worthy to the academies before they discourage me from going far to study. They never told me why growing up, guess they always saw me as their little girl that couldn’t go on her own. But I’ll show them!

Nothing notable happened all of 3rd year. Which was pretty wack because the first 2 years nearly killed me and Hoshi! Big time skip to one month before graduation...

“Hey Lili, do you think your mom can drop me off at my dad’s house the weekend of graduation?” asked Hoshi as I was doing a fitting of his graduation clothes “I got word that he’s not coming.”

“What? Not coming to your graduation?!” I gasped “After all this time, he still can’t just at least show up to say congratulations? What a coward!”

“But that’s what my dad’s friend told me and I’m not surprised” he looked at the garment in the mirror “He’s not doing that well since my other brother finally slipped away to my older brother’s place. So I’m going to pay him a visit.”

“How are your brothers anyways?” 

“They’re great! They can’t wait to see you” he laughed “Be warned that the oldest is going to be calling you ‘sister-in-law’ from now on.”

“Sister-in-law? I guess I’ll try to adjust to that” I said as I hugged them from behind “I can’t wait to finally move out of this cramped room and back to my parent’s house. Then we’d visit each other when we have free time and figure out ourselves from there I guess.”

“My brothers already have my room ready when I move out of here” he puts his hands over mine “But I’m excited to see how life is going to be with you. Oh, almost forgot to ask! What happened to the dance academy stuff?”

“I’m still waiting on two of them to get back to me” I responded “From Shibuya and Versailles.”

“Versailles...France?”

“Yea, isn’t that crazy that they considered me?”

Hoshi paused to think “What’s going to happen if you do go to France?”

“I’m- not sure yet” that threw me for a loop “All I know is that I’ll never stop loving you and I’ll miss you like crazy. And I’m going to shower you with kisses every-time we meet to make up for lost time not kissing.”

“I guess we’ll figure it out when we get there” he turned to give me a kiss “I love you.”

And a week later...I got my last two responses. Long story, short: I got accepted to Versailles on full ride only because of my double quirks. Which means that come graduation, my parents can’t say no because I made it big this time. Hoshi was the first person I told and they were happy that I’m that much closer to making my dreams come true. Hoshi got accepted to a fellowship at Meiji University for Hero Education on multiple scholarships. I was so proud of my love pursuing higher education but a little sad that we will have to part in a few months.

-Graduation Day, school auditorium-

“Oop! I see my family” I said as I peered around the crowd “See anyone you know?”

“I saw my two family friends, my brothers and I think I saw the Wild Pussycats?” responded Hoshi “Can you believe Toei-kun is graduating with us?!”

“I want to say I’m proud but I’m still salty” I crossed my arms and huffed “It’s a miracle he’s here!”

The graduation ceremony started and I’m not one to sit through things like this, so I dissociated while holding Hoshi’s hand. Afterwards, we met up with everyone for pictures.

“Hey Iida-san” the class rep got my attention “I just wanted to say it was an honor to be your classmate and I hope we could stay in touch! I want to know what schemes you get into.”

“We don’t have to be so formal Hashima-kun!” I chuckled “Aren’t we friends? I will keep in touch.”

A smile spread on his face “You- you said my name!”

“Uh yea” I pointed to his clothes “Your family name is embroidered on your Hakama, and I must say! It’s very clean needlework and colors are impeccable.”

“Oh uh, thank you!” he got embarrassed as I got closer to see the needlework “I think this is the most attention you’ve ever given me, hehe.”

“Probably, watch me forget your name again in an hour” I chuckled “But you have my number and Hoshi’s, keep in touch with us! We’d like to hang out on free time or just check in on each other.”

“I would love too!” He smiled and turned away “Until next time, bye!”

I waved him off and continued the celebrations with my family and Hoshi’s group that came to see him. Tigre and Pixie Bob came to see Hoshi to tell him that they were the ones that continued to pay for his hero tuition after he got kicked out of his dad’s. Tigre gave him the gift of binders and cash towards his top surgery. Hoshi was in tears to know that they did that even though they met briefly. He told everyone that he’s going to study at Meiji Uni and I told them I’m going to The Versailles Institute of the Arts on full ride in the Dance Program. My parents were torn about it, but they decided that maybe it was time to let me go and be who I’ve always wanted to be. Nobody was expecting it but I was in tears and hugged them tight. Everything was falling into place....well, almost everything.

-Saturday after Graduation, Togata House-

“Are you sure it’s alright to leave you here?” my mom asked worriedly.

“I’m sure, I’ll call if anything” Hoshi said as he unbuckled his seatbelt “Thank you for driving me.”

“Be careful love” I cautioned “I don’t want to hear that you got hurt.”

“Relax, he wouldn’t” He got out of the car “See you later! I love you.”

Hoshi’s plan was to spend the afternoon at his dad’s house to talk things over, then go to his brother’s place a few blocks away. He knocks on the door and stands there for a full minute.

“Maybe he’s busy” he said to himself “Oh who am I kidding, he saw the van pull up and doesn’t want to open the door.” He sat on the porch step and sulked “What can I even do now? I just want to talk.”

On the other side of the door, Mirio was having a hard time bringing himself to open the door. Watching his child sit on the porch step like they did when they were little, wondering where their mother was. It hurt to relive those memories but he also wanted to talk, he had a lot to come clean on. After what seemed an eternity, Mirio opened the door.

“Hey champ” Mirio said once their eyes met.

“Hi Dad” Hoshi stands up “How have you been?”

“I’ve just been here” Mirio didn’t want to say that he’s been depressed “but why don’t you come in?” He waits for Hoshi to walk in “Would you like some tea?”

“I would actually, being around the Iida family got me hooked on coffee” he said as he sat at the table “Rarely do they drink tea, or as Mrs Iida says ‘hot leaf juice’!”

“She said the same thing when we were in high school!” Mirio laughed as he put the kettle on “Oh you graduated huh? Sorry I couldn’t go, I couldn’t get off work and-”

“You don’t have to lie to me dad” Hoshi interrupted “I know you couldn’t bring yourself to come out of guilt.”

“Hado told you huh” Mirio sighed “Well, it’s true. I feel awful for not coming and I didn’t want to make a scene on your day.”

“That’s why I came here” Hoshi responded “I want to air out our troubles and tell you everything. Because I’m an adult now and I feel like I can talk to you about what happened.”

“I’m listening” Mirio said as he sat in the seat in front of Hoshi.

Hoshi tells him about what he’s overcome, his strong suits, about Lili, and his plans to study hero education.

“...I have to thank you for all those years of training. They prepared me for everything I’ve come across with” Hoshi’s tone changed “So thank you Dad, it may have been hard to raise me but you did that right for me.”

Mirio broke down in tears “How can you say nice things to me when I’ve done nothing but hurt you!” he slammed his fists on the table “I don’t deserve your praise, I know I hurt you and denied your identity. Surely you carry hatred for me!”

“I don’t, not anymore” Hoshi took a deep breath “You’re my dad and we’re all that we have left of each other. You lashed out because you didn’t want anything to change, I’ve come to understand that you just wanted things to stay the same. It was hard for all of us when mom died, but I never stopped to consider you the villain. I’d feel hopeless and want control if I was single father of three with a hero job, I’ve forgiven you” he put his hand on his dad’s fist “You don’t have to accept me, because I love myself and found people I consider family. But if you change your mind and accept me, I welcome it.”

“I do accept you, I’ve regretted kicking you out of the house when I did” Mirio forced himself to look at Hoshi “But how was supposed to cope? It’s like you made yourself disappear and I was scared that I did something wrong to make you like this. But your brother told me that this makes you comfortable, you feel more yourself. I realized I was trying to preserve your mother’s wish and image, but what’s the point of that! You’re not a doll on display, you’re a person and you can do whatever you want.”

“Mom’s wish?”

“That’s another thing I wanted to come clean about” Mirio wiped his tears “Your mother and I were never married. She was trying to escape her parents from forcing her into a quirk marriage, so she lied to me for a few months of dating and confessed that she just needed to get pregnant and leave town to start a new life. I got her pregnant and I said I’d house her and raise the child because I didn’t want her to go off on her own with nothing. She stayed and her parents disowned her, and we grew our family. But that was the least of her problems, she was dying due to her quirk and her only wish was to have a family with at least one daughter.” Mirio smiled “The look on her face when you were born was only something a mother could do. She was so happy that she didn’t care if she was dying, she had her wish and loved you with everything in her being. All those tight hugs before she left for ‘work trips’, those were her hugging you good bye in case she dies while she was away for medical treatment. She knew she wouldn’t live long enough to see you graduate, she wanted you to have this actually...” Mirio goes to his room and came back with a wooden box.

“Her music box? I remember this thing” Hoshi said as the box was placed in front of him “She wanted me to have this?”

“Open it” Mirio handed him a key “She said to wind it before opening it.”

Hoshi did and the gentle music played along with the spinning figure of a dancer. Inside was a note and nothing else. Hoshi picked up the note and read it aloud. 

To my darling Hime,

You’ve made all my wishes come true when you entered my life. And though I won’t be there for all the happy times or the days when you need a hug, know that I’ll always love you and I’ll be looking over you. If you ever feel lost or scared, you can find me among the stars. I can’t wait to see the person you’ll become and the people you’ll share your love with. I’m proud of you.

Love you from the stars and back,

Tsuki

(P.S. Pull on the ribbon)

“Mom’s name was Tsuki” Hoshi’s tears flowed “She was the moon! Dad this is so sad, I didn’t remember my mom’s name when I renamed myself. I chose Hoshi for a different reason!” He put the note down “She said to pull this ribbon, I wonder why.” He pulled on it to have the bottom of the music box pop off and show a hidden compartment “WHOA! WHAT THE McFUCK?!”

“I don’t believe it! It’s wads of large bills!” Mirio said in shock “I don’t know where all this money came from, your mom didn’t work.”

Hoshi took out all the neatly packed rolls of cash “There’s at least a small fortune in here! Well into the hundred thousands!” a thought ran through his head “Wait, dad. Did mom come from a wealthy family?”

“Yes she did actually, why do you ask?”

“What exactly happened when she left her family?”

“Well...first she confessed about her plans” Mirio thought hard to recall that long ago “Then her grandmother died of old age, her family got into a fight over the will and I didn’t see her for a few weeks, I got her pregnant and 2 months later she left her family to live with me.”

Hoshi’s jaw dropped “Dad, this is her inheritance money! She knew she was on the will and left with the money” Hoshi was in disbelief “Mom was clever, this was her way out and she could’ve done it by herself. She wasn’t completely helpless like you thought.”

“Huh?! I wondered why we had separate bank accounts, she paid everything with cash and paid for all her medical expenses” Mirio finally put it all together “Damn, and I was going to propose to her too.”

“You were?”

“Yup, I even kept the ring” Mirio led Hoshi to the family closet and got a ring box from the top self “I loved her, I’ve grown to love her but I guess waited too long.” He opened the ring box to show a pearl ring in hyper-shine platinum “Your mom liked shiny things and polished surfaces, so I got this ring custom made for her. I was planing to ask her when she came back from the last treatment, but...you know.” He closed the box and gave it to Hoshi “You’ll need this more than I will.”

“Huh? When will I-”

“Aren’t you going to marry Lili?” smiled Mirio “Just don’t wait too long, I lucked out and her dad almost did too...Don’t let go of her, she’s the one.”

“You approve of us?”

“Of course! She makes you very happy and is protective of you” Mirio put his hand on Hoshi’s arm “Plus I know her family. You struck it well son.”

“You called me son” Hoshi perked up.

“You are my son aren’t you?” He brought Hoshi in for a hug “It feels so good get everything off my chest, I want to have a good standing with my sons.”

Hoshi put his arms around his dad “Me too, I’m so happy I came over.”

“Okay, theres one more thing I wanted to say” Mirio said, breaking the hug “Now don’t act shocked, but I’m in a relationship with Tamaki.”

“Oh...okay” Hoshi was unfazed “So you’re gay? Demi-sexual?”

“Why are you so causal about this?” Mirio was confused.

“Dad, I’m a transgender male that’s attracted to girls” Hoshi explained “Of course I know about these things. Also, you and Mr Amajiki have been super close for years that I thought he was going to be replacing mom. And I was okay with it because I approve of him! It’s cool if you fell in love with someone else, everyone deserves love.”

“I imagined things going differently” Mirio chuckled “I’m happy that you accept me and Tamaki.”

“Now comes the awkward part, how are you going to tell Kenki and Moegi?”

“You know, I didn’t think about that” Mirio scratched his head “Guess I have to come up with a boys night at the house or something.”

And so ends Hoshi’s visit to his dad’s house. He got his closure and then some. Things were made right and he doesn’t have to worry about food or rent for a long while. Now comes the sad part...the day Lili has to leave.

-Iida Household, Thursday afternoon-

“Have you decided on a school Iwee?” I asked as all four of us were having quality sibling time in my room.

“Yeah, I’m also going to UA” He sighed “in the agent department.”

“Eww seriously? Another UA student in the house?” I gagged “You’re going to give mom and dad a heart attack!”

“Shut up! Just because we use guns and shit doesn’t mean I’m going to be the idiot that gets hurt!” Iwa huffed “Mom has been training me for weeks to prevent that.”

“Whatever you say” I shifted my attention to the twins “And you two? Where are mom and dad booting you to?”

“We’re going to that school with the beige uniforms” Rosa complained “It’s disgusting!”

“She means we’re going to the distinguished middle school in Taito” Oro clarified “I’m getting in because of my grades, Hanaka is going because of her behavior.”

“Oye what’s that supposed to mean?!” growled Rosa “You calling me a pendeja?!”

“I’m calling you a hot-headed, potty mouthed latina” Oro gave her the side eye “You and your friends!”

“How are your friends anyways?” I asked “I don’t see them coming around the house anymore.”

“They’re mall rats” Oro blurted, Rosa punched his arm “Ow! Why are you hitting me, I’m right!”

“We like the term, mall girls” Rosa said with attitude “Our daddies gave us their cards for spend on whatever we want!”

“Kinda wish he didn’t” Oro and Iwa sighed.

“F in the chat for Dad’s credit card” I bowed my head.

“F” Oro, Iwa and I said in unison.

“Yeah yeah! Say F all you want!” Rosa whips out the credit card “I bought myself the entire Gothic Chic make up line from Etude House. I’m going to live my lolita goth fantasy entering middle school.”

“That’s like $500 USD worth of makeup!” I gasped “You don’t even have a vanity to display the vanity pieces in that collection! You know what, you can take my vanity because I’d hate for you to do that thing where you just throw everything in a storage box and not care.”

“Ninos! Come down stairs!” called out mom from the living room “Your abuelitos want to talk to you!”

We ran downstairs at top speed. We love our abuelitos from America but it’s a shame they can’t visit whenever they can. They seemed very proud of me with my decision to go to a dance academy. After the video call, I thought about my mom’s post UA pathway and how she did it.

“Mom? How did you achieve everything you wanted?” I asked my mom once everyone left the living room “Like, how hard was it after high school?”

My mom gave me a melancholy look and sighed “To tell you the truth Lili, I don’t have everything I wanted. It felt like my entire life, my plans, all of it was falling apart at the beginning. But that was because I didn’t know I was on the wrong path” She explained “I didn’t have somebody to tell me that I should leave my toxic relationship or to rethink my life choices. All I did was pick myself back up and kept running forward, because that’s all I could do being by myself. Everything I have now is a blessing and proof that I got lucky at just the right time.”

“Oh...does that mean you’re not happy?”

“I didn’t say that, I am happy! I have steady income, married, had children and have incredible friends that have my back. But those are my blessings” She smiled “I don’t deserve them, but they’re here to stay. What I really wanted was to live my life in America with my family, go to college and be a quirk doctor or a writer! And maybe have a few kids before I die. My life was laid out for me before the incident that changed everything. What my life is now, is nothing that I’d ever imagined myself having! It’s beyond my wildest dreams, all because I decided to take a life-threatening chance.”

“What did you do?” I was curious, she’s never told me this story.

“I was 15 when I made this decision...” she told the story of the incident “...it was one of my most valiant feats but one that costed me my freedom. I wanted to come back a perfect daughter, one that can protect my family and provide for them. I left behind all my dreams, family and my soul mate so I could protect them. And everyday, I pray that today will be the day I can go back and be with them again.” She looks into my eyes “Do you understand why I was so overprotective of you?”

“Yes, I get it now” I croaked as I wiped my tears “You didn’t want me to repeat your suffering. But why did you let me go this time?”

“Because you’re following your dreams” she chuckled and ruffled my hair “You’ve faced your own trials and lived through them all. And all children have to leave their parents at some point, so it’s your turn to start a journey into your own future. But this time, you have us to help you and have a home to return to.”

“Mom, I’ll come back being the perfect daughter then!” I said, fighting the tears “Someone to be proud of!”

“Silly girl, you are the perfect daughter” she wiped my tears “and I’m very proud of you. I want you to come back feeling accomplished, okay?”

“Okay mom” I pounced on her to hug her “thank you, for everything you’ve done.”

“No Lili, thank you for being you and blessing me” She responded as she squeezed tighter “I’m so happy to be your mother.”

I didn’t know I needed this conversation with my mom. But I’m glad I did! There’s this, I wanna say...closure? That I didn’t know was needed. Everything makes sense...the heavily protected housing, the gap from her graduation from UA to when she had me, to the friendships she’s made, to why she doesn’t want to talk about going back home. Maybe she does see herself in me, the passionate fighter and dreamer. Thats who we are. I’m going to make all my dreams come true, for her and myself! She’s my inspiration going into this next part of my journey...oh shit, it’s 10pm! I should sleep!

-Chapter 13, End-

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[roraewrites]

nine

[ sakura’s secret ] rating: m

// again, a HUGE thank you to all of you! y’all make me happy.

previous | next

Sakura wasn’t exactly too sure how she lucked out that night. She remained on her side of the couch, with her pen in her hand as she finished her notes. Sasuke seemed to have zoned out, but Sakura could feel the tension in the air between the two of them.

Her hand burned from where his lips had touched, and as she fought off the feeling to glance over at him, it wasn’t enough.

“Have you had a lot of girlfriends?” She asked quietly, her hand still covering her face while she continued to write.

Sasuke clicked his tongue before exhaling, “only one. It didn’t work out, lasted a month. I was still in college.” His monotone voice rang out.

Now that Sakura had uncovered her face, her viridian eyes watched him glance back over at her. She could already feel her cheeks tint over pink, and her skin numb up while her heart clenched in her chest. His smoldering, black eyes remained on her, thick lashes blinking before he asked his own question.

“Why don’t you have a boyfriend?”

“I--uh,” Sakura started, her mind frantically racing for an answer, “I’ve never had time for one, I guess.”

“Interesting.” He responded with cool voice. “Okay then. I take it you’ve never kissed anyone, have you?”

Sakura felt her legs tense up and the muscles in her arms tighten. Her fingers curled around the pen in her hand and teeth gritted against one another. Sasuke’s eyes stared right through her, his overwhelming presence making itself clear once again.

“No,” she answered honestly, but with the lack of confidence in her voice, she felt like a silly child.

His response was as expected. Sasuke smirked, his eyes lighting up with something Sakura had never seen before and as much as she wanted to look away from him, she couldn’t tear her eyes from his. He looked absolutely handsome in the minimal light offered from the lamp, and the way his high cheekbones and strong jawline tensed from his smirk, stirred up the butterflies from within Sakura’s stomach.

Her heart beat echoed in her ears, while her throat became tight with anticipation. She felt her fingers shaking under his stare now, but before Sakura could regain her composure, she was setting her books aside and making her way towards Sasuke now. He didn’t move under her gaze, only waited for her to approach him.

“Is it weird, Sasuke?” She breathed out before coming to sit on her knees beside him. He was still lounged back, one arm on the armrest, the other resting on the back of the couch. “Kissing?”

He raised an eyebrow before straightening his posture and coming to sit up. “Not if it’s with the right person,” he answered quietly. Sakura was perched next to him now, his form sitting right in front of her with his eyes focused on her and only her.

She wanted to reach her hand forward and brush his locks of obsidian tresses from his face, tuck the longer pieces behind his ear and feel his skin clash with hers; only she didn’t move, she only stared into his eyes, begging him to move closer, begging him to teach her something other than literature.

Sakura had watched many chick flicks, the iconic ones when they meet a man, hook up, start dating, break up, but then end the movie with forgiveness and a strong lip-locking session. She would always feel her heart rate increase while her stomach would juggle the butterflies that fluttered lightly inside. She never thought that she would feel this anxious, gut wrenching, time frozen experience, though.

His scent lured her in, begged her to come closer, and the more she found her body moving closer to his, his left hand came to rest on her tricep. He wasn’t entirely stopping her, but he also wasn’t letting her advance.

She could see the desire in his soot eyes, notice the glimmering fascination that reflected from the unnatural lighting, yet he didn’t accept the fact that she was growing closer. He only responded like a responsible adult would. “It’s getting late.”

Sakura glanced at his wooden clock on the wall.

“Oh, shit.” Her lower lip sunk into her mouth, welcoming the teeth that bit into the flesh. “How is it already ten?”

The tension between the two of them had melted at some point, and while she still sat close to him, she still felt an odd distance separating them. Maybe it was because she was younger than him, still a senior in high school and finding that her crush on her sensei was something more than a crush and also way out of her reach.

This all should’ve been wrong, and Sakura should’ve acknowledged that the moment her beating heart would thrum against her ribcage whenever he was near. Or how her blood would turn to molten lava and she was never able to control her blush.

Maybe she would’ve acknowledged all of it if she hadn’t found that she was absolutely infatuated by this man. Maybe she would’ve known that this was all wrong if she hadn’t broken the ice that coated his personality underneath his rough, outer shell.

His fingers were now twirling the ends of her silk, rose locks and Sakura accepted it. Sasuke was gentle, he was soft-spoken when needed, calming, his presence overwhelming at times and he could come off as intimidating, but he was also her safe haven. As funny as it sounded inside of her head, she felt comfortable and relaxed around him -- even under the gaze of his abyss dark eyes, she couldn’t help the nagging feeling that encouraged her.

“We should probably get going,” he muttered through each short breath that he took. His fingers came undone from her curled ends and into the pocket of his slacks. When he stood from the sofa, he flicked the television off and offered a hand towards Sakura.

She accepted it, a jolt of static running wildly through her blood. His hand was large, his fingers soft while his palms were calloused. “Do you work out?” Sakura asked, only the realize that it was probably a random thing to ask.

“Yes,” he replied almost as quickly as she had asked. No wonder his hands were calloused; as rough as they were, he was gentle with her as he pulled her from her seat.

She twirled around on her toes and began to pack her belongings up in her bag, only to have Sasuke stop her. He reached towards the drawing that she had made and held it up. “Can I keep this?”

“Why?”

“Is it wrong for a teacher to have a drawing made by his student? He mocked with a smirk.

Sakura frowned before smiling lightly. “Whatever.”

.

.

.

Her house was dark the moment he dropped her off. The porch light had been left on, and as Sakura began to undo her seatbelt, Sasuke’s hand rested on her wrist.

“Why are you so curious about how a kiss feels?” He inquired.

The same butterflies from before flocked out, and she couldn’t help the knot that formed in her throat or the way her eyes widened. “I guess I was just curious. You see people kissing in movies like it’s no big deal, so… I just wonder what it’s really like?”

“I’m sure you’ll find out one day,” he spoke with a light hearted tone and somewhat of a smile. He retracted his hand before she nodded with curious intentions.

Sakura grabbed her bag from the back seat of his car before leaning in and smiling at him. “Good night!”

“I’ll see you in the morning,” he responded with a grimace.

.

.

.

Throughout the course of the next couple of weeks, Sakura found herself busy with school work and studying for multiple different tests. From Sasuke’s class, to Gai’s, she was either working on her running form, performing many different strength exercises to pass her physical exams, or doing page after page of homework from literature, to math, to chemistry. She felt her brain spiralling out of control; along with all of her school work, she progressed in applying for scholarships as well.

Her relationship with Ino had been awkward lately, whether it be Ino avoiding Sakura, or Sakura avoiding Ino, they hadn’t been on speaking terms. One day, Naruto finally brought the subject up to Sakura.

“When are you two going to start acting like best friends again? It’s getting weird,” he stated through each bite of ramen.

Sakura frowned at him before popping a grape in her mouth. “Not sure.”

It was Naruto’s turn to frown. “Look, I get how all you girls are with your emotions and moodiness, but c’mon. You gotta get over whatever happened and move on. It’s weird not seeing the two of you attached by the hip anymore.”

Sakura frowned slightly before reflecting on his words. “Yeah,” she answered plain and simple, “I guess you have a point.”

Naruto finally offered a gentle smile before taking another bite. “I just want you to be happy. You’ve been working on schoolwork nonstop, that I worry sometimes. You’ve become great at keeping to yourself as well.”

“What do you mean?” Sakura raised a brow in question.

“Well, you stay after school all the time working on school work, and then avoid me during the weekend because of more schoolwork.” His voice held concern and worry, as did his ocean colored eyes.

Sakura’s mind flashed to the few evenings she had been spending with Sasuke. She would wait after school and either write notes or work on scholarships, have dinner with him and then spend some quality time at his condo. While they would only watch TV, chatter over random things that had taken place throughout the day, or sit in a comfortable silence, Sakura felt that their time together was to be valued.

After all, her friends were starting to catch on to her absence.

“Sakura?” Naruto asked, his face appearing right in front of hers.

“Oh--right. There’s a lot of time and energy going into my schoolwork lately, Naruto. I have dreams, goals that I want to accomplish and if I don’t give it my all, I won’t make it.”

“Oh right! Ms. Future Doctor!” He spat out with an ear to ear grin. Sakura chuckled softly before ruffling his golden hair.

“That’s right,” she responded. “I’ll see you later, I’ve got some assignments to turn in--”

“I forgot to ask!” Naruto interrupted her with apologetic eyes. “Halloween, Friday night. Everyone is going out then coming to my place to hang out. You in?”

Sakura pursed her lips before thinking about it. Maybe it wasn’t a bad idea to get together with her friends and spend some time with them again. After all, she had a pretty set schedule of studying and tending to her secret more so than entertain the idea of being an outgoing senior girl like the rest of the gals in her class.

“Sure,” she offers. “Why not?”

.

.

.

Her phone began to vibrate along the counter, and when she glanced down at the screen, she finds Ino’s nickname in white letters.

“Hello?”

“Forehead! Naruto said you’re going to the party tomorrow. What’re you going as?”

Sakura sat with her pen in her hand as she began to think about Ino’s question. She hadn’t put any thought into it, and now that she did, she didn’t want to dress up.

“Nothing,” she responded. “I’ll just show up at Naruto’s once everyone gets back.”

“You can’t just go there without a costume, Forehead.” Ino’s voice was like venom, her reaction time quick. It was like the two of them had hardly missed a beat. Sakura laughed into the phone.

“I have nothing to wear,” her confession resulted in a short exhale from Ino.

“I’ll bring something over tomorrow and we can go together! Sound good?” Sakura began to speak, but Ino cut her off again. “Good! Bye!”

She pressed her phone down the counter and shook her head.

“Typical Ino.”

.

.

.

“I am not wearing that fucking thing outside. Do you know how cold it is right now?” Sakura hissed. Ino stood in front of her, holding the ‘sexy feline costume’ like Ino had called it.

“Every guy will love it. Just put it on,” Ino deadpanned dryly, her patience wearing thin the more Sakura refused. “Look, I’m dressing as a bunny. We’ll be cute!”

Sakura looked around her room, trying to find something that would strike up a distracting conversation, but the moment Ino shoved the outfit into her arms, she felt defeated. “If I don’t like it, I’m not wearing it -- oh, wait--”

“Shut up and put it on, Billboard!”

She frowned, her viridian eyes matching up Ino’s baby blues before submerging through the bedroom door and slinking into the bathroom. She held the costume up before groaning. She slid into it with ease, pulling her arms through the slim, black crop top and pulling the spaghetti straps over her shoulders; it hugged onto the curves of her hips, squeezed her breasts with the built in, padded bra and even made her waist look tinier than it already was.

Sakura bit her lip before pulling the spandex leggings on next.

“This is such an Ino outfit,” she whined. With the leggings pulled all the way up, she felt something hanging from the elastic band behind her -- the tail of the costume brushing against her bum.

“Such an Ino outfit.”

With cute, black flats slipped onto her feet and triangular ears holding onto her head from a headband, Sakura glanced at herself in the mirror. She swallowed, imaging just exactly what Sasuke would think if he were to see her. Her bare arms broke out with goosebumps at the thought, and the moment she walked back through the door, Ino was perched right there.

“Look how cute!”

“I feel silly,” Sakura admitted, her cheeks turning pink under the eyes of her best friend.

“Well don’t. You look great. Look at those curves, girl.”

Sakura felt her blush darken in color, the back of her neck burning at Ino’s compliment. “Fine, but I’m changing once we get to Naruto’s.”

“But that’s when the fun starts to happen! He’s having an actual party, y’know? Iruka is out of town, that means it’s party central at Naruto’s. Before we go, though,” Ino stopped Sakura before she could get around her friend. The blonde pulled out a stick of eyeliner, and with an ear to ear grin, she held one of Sakura’s shoulders and brought the pencil to her face.

“Ino,” Sakura warned, but it was too late. The blonde had already gotten her way, lining Sakura’s face with whiskers much like Naruto’s, and finishing off with a dot on her nose. Sakura felt herself seething with anger now, but Ino was happy with the final look.

“Now you’re ready.”

.

.

.

Naruto had invited Sakura, Ino, Shikamaru, Sai, Kiba, and a few others from their school for their outing, but the moment everyone showed up, they decided against it. Sakura also didn’t feel uncomfortable in her costume anymore, seeing as everyone else had dressed up as well. Ino put the icing on the cake with her bunny costume though.

“You look nice,” Naruto complimented as he began to bring their cheap beer and hard liquor up from his basement. He handed Sakura a couple of bottles to carry, and while she walked with him, she felt like multiple pairs of eyes were on her.

She hated the feeling of the skin tight leggings and the way Ino’s black crop top brushed against her skin. Sakura felt revealed, naked. “Who’s all coming tonight?” She asked, trying to distract her mind from the claustrophobic strangle that creeped up her body.

“Lots of people. From other high schools, people from colleges. I dunno yet, we’ll see!” He grinned back at her as he set the case of beer on the counter. “Should be killer though.”

“Right,” Sakura agreed. “I might go put my sweater on.”

Naruto clasped her shoulder in his hand, causing her to jump in his wake. His concerned eyes reigned down on her from above, his eyebrows raised slightly. “If you’re not comfortable with wearing that, then why wear it?”

Sakura couldn’t help but let a small smile appear on her lips. She couldn’t get over the fox ears that sat atop his head, or the bushy tail he had hanging from his waist.

“To support your party, I guess,” she responded with an unsure tone. Butterflies fluttered in her stomach while her mind did backflips. “And because Ino wanted me to dress up.”

Naruto crossed his arms before laughing slightly. “You certainly are a good friend to her. Anyways, let’s get finished setting up! People will be here any moment.”

.

.

.

Sakura found herself people watching most of the night. They came in spurts, from people coming dressed up as cute animals to deadly ones, super heroes to villains, slutty costumes to some people who didn’t even dress up. Sakura simply sat on the balcony from Naruto’s room, a drink in her hand, while her emerald eyes watched.

The patio was packed due to the beerpong tournament that Naruto had started up. The music was loud, tons of laughter and chattering, and Sakura found herself alone while she watched people make drunken asses of themselves.

As she threw the rest of her drink back, utterly disgusted with the warm beer, she made her way through Naruto’s room and downstairs to get another drink. She had been catcalled multiple times that night, but instead of responding, she carried on with her night like nothing had happened.

It wasn’t that she was refusing to have fun, she just didn’t want to be there. The moment she walked through the kitchen entry way, instead of heading towards the beer, she grabbed the hard stuff and began to make herself a drink.

“What’re you making?” A familiar sublime voice sounded against the shell of her ear. Sakura felt chills rush throughout her body, and a smile form on her lips.

“What’re you doing here?” She turned her head slightly, yet her eyes remained on the bottle while she poured the liquor into her cup. Once she finished, she turned to see his familiar smouldering eyes and that damned gorgeous smirk of his.

Sasuke’s hair wasn’t artfully ruffled around, or tamed. It was thrown around with hair gel now, his bangs falling over his eyes while he had casual clothes on that Sakura absolutely fell for. A pair of dark gray jeans, a black pullover hoodie, and a pair of Vans. He was such a mature person with a young appearance.

“You look so young,” Sakura cooed, her eyes glistening as she eyed him up and down.

“Hn, considering I still am young,” he retorted with a scoff. “I figured I’d stop by. Some friends of mine said they were coming.”

“Friends?” Sakura questioned almost instantly. Sasuke’s thumb pointed back to a guy with whitish-blue hair and pale skin. The color of his eyes looked almost unreal with that purple hue, but then again, he could’ve been wearing contacts. “Does he teach, too?”

“Nah. He’s still in college. On his last year, though,” Sasuke answered before taking her cup and glancing into it. “What did you make?”

Sakura couldn’t answer him, she couldn’t get over the fact that he was here, at one of his student’s parties, dressed down like some younger version of himself.

He looked fucking amazing.

“Also,” he whispered before reaching around her, “nice costume.”

Sakura felt the familiar blush that she had been experiencing more and more lately come to her cheeks and heat up the tips of her ears. “Ino made me and--”

“I’m serious, nice costume.”

Sakura frowned before stepping aside. “What’re you even doing?”

“Making you something else,” he responded, obviously knowing damn well what he was doing. Sakura simply watched from the side with curious eyes and a tap of her foot.

“Try this,” Sasuke finally handed back the cup before stepping back and pulling his hoodie on over his messy hair. The way it framed his high cheekbones made him look like an angel sent down from the heavens, and Sakura just couldn’t shake how young and casual he looked.

“You’re not scared of getting caught?” Sakura questioned, her anxiety getting the best of her. “You’ll get in trouble, Sasuke.”

He raised an eyebrow before shaking his head. “There’s too many people here to really notice. Plus, I’ll be leaving soon anyways.” His tone was an octave lower, his eyes a shade darker as he smirked. “Care to join me?”

“I can’t,” Sakura spoke too quickly.

Sasuke only nodded. “Fair enough,” his smirk diminished. “I’ll see you around then.”

Sakura felt every ounce of energy leave the moment he turned around, and before he could depart, she called out to him. “Wait!”

His head turned, his eyes landing on her in her silly cat costume.

“Give me two seconds,” she set the drink down and booked it upstairs. She stripped from the crop top that Ino had given her and slid into her own black hoodie, along with a pair of denim skinny jeans. She kept the black flats on, discarded the ears and rubbed the drawn on whiskers and nose off.

With her bag around her shoulders, she came back downstairs and found Sasuke waiting right by the door, girls standing in front of him, trying to strike up a conversation. Sakura stopped on the top stair and watched, but it was just so much like Sasuke to look away the moment they asked a question and have his dark eyes land on her, a smirk painting itself on his lips.

She bounced down the stairs now, meeting him at the door before they left.

“Sakura!”

She felt her blood turn to ice and her body freeze.

“Where are you going?”

It was Ino. When Sakura turned to meet her baby blue eyes, she smiled sheepishly. She could feel her stomach tying itself into a million different knots while sweat began to accumulate against her hairline. Sasuke didn’t move from his spot, he had frozen too and waited for Sakura to convince Ino as to why she was leaving.

“I’m going home,” Sakura lied through her teeth.

“Home? With this guy? Who is this?”

Sakura could hear Ino’s words slurring together, while her steps were sloppy. Now that inched her way closer, she could see the puffy red eyes on her best friend. Even her costume was looking rather haggard now.

“Who is this?” She repeated, but this time with more force to her voice.

Sasuke turned to meet her gaze, and the moment he came face to face with her, her eyes lit up.

“Woah!” Ino shouted. “Hottie!”

Sakura stifled the laugh that escaped through her lips, not only at her friend, but at the look on Sasuke’s face. He looked absolutely unamused, and the longer Ino stared at him, the narrower his eyes grew. Sakura felt that it was convenient to break up their staring contest now.

“Right, we’re going now,” Sakura said as she began to take a few steps away from her blonde friend.

Ino winked before shouting, “text me and tell me about your night!”

Sakura’s face flushed and by the time she turned on her heel, she had her hood pulled up and over her face. Sasuke followed her from behind, and although she wasn’t looking at him, she could sense the smirk on his face while his eyes shimmered with amusement.

“You’re crazy,” Sakura spoke through the fabric. “Damn crazy.”

The minimal light offered by the pale moon was rather eerie, and through Sakura’s insults, she felt Sasuke behind her in seconds. It reminded her of her first day at his condo. The way his lips pressed to the corner of her jaw, the way her body completely shut down at his touch. Now he was behind her again, and shadowing each step that she took.

Sasuke didn’t respond, only remained behind her as she led the way. They were now far away from Naruto’s party; no longer in ear shot of the music or the stragglers that had left already. They passed by trick-or-treaters and parents that walked their children, until they made it to the outer circle. They walked the path that led through the residential part of Konoha, passing by multiple houses and fenced yards.

Their quiet walk eventually stopped when Sakura noticed that she had no idea where she was going. Sasuke, as smart of a man that he is, noticed this far before she did.

“Finally realize that we’re walking blindly in the dark?”

Sakura responded with a scowl before exhaling, her back coming to lean against the nearest trunk of a maple tree. “Did you park somewhere?”

“I did,” he responded casually. He was now standing before her, his eyes gazing down on her.

Sakura felt her heart as it began to soar and her knees lock up. She was no longer casually leaning against the tree, but now, she watched as Sasuke took a step towards her.

“Where are you parked?” She squeaked out.

“Down the road,” he responded before taking another step, “in the opposite direction.”

Sakura was drowning now. She felt those familiar butterflies break free and not only flutter in her stomach, but throughout her entire body. Her emerald eyes stayed on Sasuke, her heart hammering against her chest while a lump formed in her throat.

His cinnamon and smoke scent rushed through her nostrils the closer he got, and now that he was hovering over her body, she could feel the warmth that radiated from him.

Their bodies were hardly brushing now, but the close proximity of him caused her chest to clench and her fingers to tremble. This was the closest she had ever been to a guy, and the fact that is was Sasuke made her entire body go haywire under his intense stare.

Sakura felt her hands reach out to him, one landing on his left pectoral, right above his heart. From there, she could feel the frantic beat of his heart, and he too, had been more than nervous in this intimate moment between the two of them.

“Sasuke,” she breathed out while her other hand came to rest on his other pectoral.

He was built, his body hard from beneath his clothes. Sakura was unfamiliar with what to do in a position like this, but instead of overthinking, she let her body do the thinking for her. With her hands on his pecs, Sasuke’s hand came to rest on her hip, while the other came to play with the ends of her pastel locks.

“Sakura,” he responded with a husky voice. He was closing the gap between the two of them now, his body growing closer to hers until he was leaning right up on her.

Sakura’s arms began to wrap around the back of his neck, her fingers pulling the hoodie from his head and releasing his wild, obsidian locks. She always pondered just how his hair felt, and now she knew; thick but smooth. Her nails massaged the nape of his neck, while the fingers on her other hand ran through the roots of his hair.

“You have no idea what you do to me,” his voice sounded over her ear now. His breath was warm against the skin of her neck, and while she pulled him closer, his lips pressed softly to her ear lobe.

She breathed out both a pleasurable but shocked groan into his ear, and when she felt his lips pull away from her skin, she felt her mind screaming for more.

He pulled his head away now, his eyes staring into hers, almost asking a silent permission. She didn’t know how to respond, she didn’t know what to do now. He was so close, yet so far away and the longer he looked into her eyes with those dark, abyss eyes of his own, the more Sakura desired him.

“Is this is what you really want?”

Sakura felt her lips part, and her eyes grow heavy. Of course this is what she wanted. She was practically breathing him in, soaking him up, the only thing left was to taste his lips against hers.

“Yes,” she breathed out gently.

He blinked once, twice, until his lips were just above hers, his eyelashes closing over his smoldering eyes, and just like Sasuke, Sakura felt her own eyelids close over viridian eyes.

It was almost non existent, yet the most exciting thing in the world. She felt like she was on cloud nine, yet anchored down. The only thing she could feel were his lips pressed to hers, tender and soft, gentle like the fluttering wings of a butterfly.

Sasuke’s hand cupped her cheek, the other resting on her hip while Sakura stood on her tiptoes and pulled him closer. They held each other under the pale light of the moon, their lips pressed together, while their beating hearts beat in unison.

Sakura wasn’t exactly sure why he had pulled away, but as they made eye contact for that brief second, she could see someone different in those dark eyes of his. When he pulled her back into his embrace and his lips pressed against hers once more, she tightened her grip around his neck, relishing in his scent, his touch, and his taste.

Happy fucking Halloween.