#all gays wish to be these birds

[chickenhoops]

Currently obsessed with this gay pigeon couple up for adoption and I think tumblr will be obsessed with them too.

[headful-of-worms]

I’m surprised by how much I’ve been likely the finch app. I haven’t been using it for too long but the fact I’ve gone past 2 weeks is pretty good for me lol. It’s been the most helpful with motivation for dumb little task I either forget about or am mildly procrastinating.

My friend code is: SR14T4VSFW

Anyone can feel free to add me! If you’re interested in downloading the app dm me and you can get a micropet from my referral. I don’t like to feel like I’m advertising but like… I am. Oh well I do really honestly recommend it and if you’re gonna download it you might as well get a cute little guy!

[technoregression]

Omg 🥺 I love him he looks happy

[captainsaveawoah]

Idk. Something, something secret baby/double life except Johnny and you are together and you’re kept a secret (surprise the man is secretive about his life) from the team.

Bit of a timeline au, You date a few years, you two get married, but it’s still all a secret. Price has an idea, his will has changed, signed off on it himself but doesn’t dig too deep, knows his boys will come to him.

Gaz is the first to comment, Johnny never taking anyone home. Can hear the man most nights finishing into his hands with a groan that sounds something like a name. Johnny just laughs and tips his beer, steering the conversation away.

Ghost though. Can see it. The way Johnny, despite wanting to charge in, gun ‘em down, will take caution, the worry in his words when he’s hurt or downed, not for himself but for someone at home.

Yet, Johnny stays quiet. Doesn’t say a word, rushes back to a “cold, empty apartment” Simon can tell when he and his bird are having a rough patch (little bit of a ghoap thing because they are as gay as they come idk) can tell when Johnny and his bird are in a good place. But the man doesn’t say a damned thing.

You and Johnny have sex… a lot of sex, when he’s home of course. A young couple, so in love, so happy, so wrapped in each other it’s like you made for one another.

You get married, he builds you a house, moves you to Scotland of course. “Need our weens to speak like their papa, yeah?” Knocks you up. Gives you THE CHUBBIEST little boy with his daddies eyes. You know about the task force, know they don’t know about you. You wish they did, wish you knew them personally, they’re the only family Johnny has, but you know Johnny keeps you away for your safety.

He’s about 3 when Simon is at your door. Your eyes widen, like you think you’re dreaming before your on the ground screaming and BEGGING Simon to say it’s not true.

The big guy sticks around, Johnny had felt he wouldn’t come home on this one, told Simon about you before the mission. Asked him to look after you and his son if he doesn’t make it home for supper. Ghost shrugs him off, makes some stupid joke but watches Johnny’s body crumple to the ground as he gets shot in the head.

Johnny told him it had to be him, “Kyle’s got a bird. Captain’s got too much on his plate. Plus you seem to escape death at every turn. Need you to take care of my heart.”

Your son is quick to take to Simon. You not so much, he hangs around, eats all your food, changes his clothes all the time, crowds your space while you grieve the man who became your whole.

But there are days, when you hear Simon and think it’s Johnny. There are days when Simon holds your son and you see Johnny. There are days when Simon’s head is between your thighs you feel like it’s Johnny. You feel bad, he tells you it’s okay. And you believe him, you feel it, mourn it with each passing day, knowing that one day you’ll look up and see only Simon, Johnny will always be there, but one day it’ll just be Simon.

Idk tho.

[androgynealienfemme]

"We go from store to store, trying to things on and inspecting them. I give my opinions on dresses and shoes, blouses and lipstick colors. Sometimes I say things that make the other women look at me, agape, as though my mouth has been possessed by that flighty queen from Queer Eye even while the rest of my body still looks like any other big dumb boy's. I say that I like a skirt but I wish it were bias-cut instead of A-line, or that I am not fond of the fashion for surplice tops, or that the post-WWII idiom in shoes this season is amusing but rarely looks good on actual feet, or that I like the look of a bolero jacket. I know the names of colors, heliotrope and coral and Nile blue, and I can say without hesitation whether a lipstick might look better matte with a bit of powder.

These other women look at me with wonder, their boyfriends and husbands having made a fetish out of refusing to learn such words under any circumstances, as though merely pronouncing the word "periwinkle" or "princess seam" could easily turn a strong man gay as a box of birds. They say to her, "That's your husband?" in voices that loiter between admiring and disgusted, as though they know that there's no force on earth that could make their men or boys take such interest in their clothing and they think they might really prefer that to the spectacle of me, filling an armchair, legs crossed ankle over knee, looking just right until I say "tea length."

The point is that she wants other girls to see what it looks like to have a boy so cracy in love with you, as I am, that he will spend an afternoon talking about capri pants to have a boy so delighted by you that he never calls you by your name, but addresses you always as "beautiful girl," or "my love" or occasionally and with great fondness, "boss." To have a boy who will happily fetch your next-size-down and carry your bags and charm the salesclerks at the register without flirting overmuch and just generally try to make himself as useful as possible, all for the dizzy and undying pleasure of making you happy. And even though I am not a boy, I look like one, and so I can be complicit with her in this kind of wonderful afternoon, part indulgence of her great beauty and style, part guerilla feminist activism.

Later, when we walk through the mall or down the sidewalk, me laden with packages that are clearly hers, I watch the eyes of the people we pass: the women who look at me with a certain longing, wishing they had their own boys to carry the bags. The men who look at her with an unmistakable hunger, wishing that they had the honor of schlepping for a girl like her, and then look at me with a certain edge of disbelief, not quite clear about why I get to squire this marvelous example of femininity around when they are clearly wealthier, more handsome, better hung. I have learned to meet all of these gazes with a calm kind of sweetness. There's no point in defensiveness or sheepishness or challenge. I'm the one holding her bags."

"Being a Shopping Switch” Butch is a Noun essays by S. Bear Bergman (2006)

[moongreenlight]

“Realistic Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley headcanons” and then it’s just the fun police.

Mdni. Nsfw below cut.

- It makes me want to scoop my fucking brain out with a spoon when people say that Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley is some shy, anxious soft boy. I really do not believe he’d need to be coddled after a nightmare or babied when he’s feeling angsty. He is fine, y’all. Please don’t call paw patrol.

He is a soldier. He’s a war criminal. He is traumatized to the point of numbness. He is fucked up and weird and insane and honestly I think that we should all let everybody have their thing.

I cannot fix him. I do not want to fix him. I can only make him worse.

- Sorry but I just cannot write him having any kind of romantic feelings toward Soap. I like writing their dynamic more brotherly.

Furthest they’ve gone is ‘locker room gay.’

Like Johnny sends him dick pics on occasion because he thinks it’s funny and it pisses Ghost off.

That being said, I do read the occasional Ghoap fic. I’m not a perfect person. Sometimes it’s just yummy delicious.

- Feel like he’s the kind of freak to intentionally go to the gym without headphones. Something about discipline. Opting to just stare at the wall in front of him while he’s doing cardio or counting repetitions of exercises.

But on the rare occasion that he does indulge himself, he has a playlist of like 5-6 songs he likes and when it ends he just goes back to silence. Divorced dad rock. Chorded headphones only.

- Doesn’t have the debilitating commitment issues as people paint him out to have. Just commitment-phobic. Obviously stems from his past. He’s got that sexy deep rooted fear of abandonment or something horrible happening to people he actually lets close to him. But he’s not completely turned off by the idea of romantic attachments or close friends, just a little hesitant to open himself up to that kind of opportunity.

Probably very cagey about romantic partners. Doesn’t want the guys to know about you. Doesn’t keep pictures of you around his bunk or anything like that. He’s worried it’ll somehow compromise your safety. Worried about you getting swept up in his work.

- Women’s rights? Or Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley? I really do think he’d love to have a partner who lets him provide *everything* for them. He just wants to serve and protect. Wants his bird to be in a gilded cage all nice and safe and reliant on him for survival.

Doesn’t even really like the idea of you going to the grocery store by yourself. Would prefer if you just stayed put and tended his home and cooked him meals and let him dote on you and provide everything you could ever need.

- Has a really strange understanding of technology. He’s fine with the newer military stuff. That’s his element. He can do electrical wiring, set up a TV, install security cameras. That’s all whatever. But a cell phone? He doesn’t give a shit enough to keep up with the new updates and all the new things you have to learn when you get a smartphone. Wishes he would have kept a flip phone.

Texts like this: [OK. See youtonight.]

MAYBE has a private Facebook with no profile picture where the only things on his wall are Price wishing him a happy birthday every year.

His camera roll is like; 97 accidental screenshots of his Lock Screen, a few pictures of him and the task force boys, the inside of his pocket (another accident), a sunrise, a few cool things he found on missions, 34 pictures of Soap and Gaz when they took his phone.

- Insufferable in the early stages of trying to date him. Little to no communication other than basically demanding you meet him somewhere. Texting or talking on the phone? Like pulling fucking teeth. You think he’d rather be dead.

It was a headache getting him to go out in the first place. Maybe you worked at a bar where the guys would come to have a drink after a long day. He’s a little stand-offish but he’s handsome and he knows how to banter well enough for you to be persuaded by a coworker to slip him your number after you complained one too many times about a shit hookup or yet another terrible first date. It takes him nearly two weeks to phone you.

“Didn’t think you’d call.”

“Didn’t think I would either.”

He takes you out once, you think he seems sort-of interested, then he doesn’t phone or text you back for three days. You get over it. A few more dates in. You can tell he’s a bit more relaxed. A bit more open. You’re less worried that you’re a terrible conversationalist. Then he goes on a month long deployment without saying anything in advance. Radio fucking silent yet again. You want to tear your hair out. When he finally gets back, he’ll text you something like [Atthat pub you like. Drinks ?] completely out of the blue. You think you may actually go insane.

- Once he’s gotten used to you, it’s like the sole purpose of his life is to be your protector even if you’ve only recently convinced yourself he may want something casual. You’re small and grab-able. He knows how nasty people can be and what think when they see you. He needs to know that you’re taken care of, kept safe from such a scary world.

So he’ll just linger around you. All the time. Standing behind you when you’re at the till at the store, staring down the cashier who was only trying to be friendly when they asked if you had any fun plans for the rest of the day. Big arms folded over his chest. Looming so largely he threatens to eclipse you without taking a single step forward. Eyes burning a hole into the poor person who hastily finishes the transaction without another word.

Walking silently next to you in the evenings after you’re both off work; close enough to brush shoulders, but that’s about it. Listening to you chirp on about your day. Occasionally offering a small grunt of acknowledgement or a few words of interjection. Always walks on the side of the path that he thinks could pose you the most immediate danger. Shielding you from what may lurk in a darkened alley or a hedge or a small thicket of trees.

Scary dog privilege, but like… for when you go to fill your car up with gas in broad daylight in a good part of town and he insists on standing out there with you. ‘Just in case’ If he even lets you out of the car in the first place.

- AND OFF THAT POINT. I think once he’s decided that he’s actually fond of you, it goes from zero to a hundred so fast it makes your head spin.

Like the last time you spoke, it was still unclear on if you were keeping things casual or not and now you’re at dinner and the waiter just asked him if the two of you wanted dessert and Simon just grunts “dunno. Ask the missus.” ??? He sucks so bad I NEED him.

- As much as I love an overly possessive and jealous Simon, I saw this tweet that said “My girlfriend can wear what she wants because she’s a hoe and I knew that before we started dating” and it changed my life.

He’s secure enough not to need to cause a scene if someone makes a pass on you in public. He understands that you’re attractive and that other people are bound to find you attractive too. (Not that he doesn’t still want to pull their fingernails out one by one, threatening them and everything they love for daring to exist near you. He’s just got better control over himself than that. King.)

He knows he’s better than any of your other options. Nobody else could keep you as safe as he could. They don’t know the world like he does. They don’t know how breakable you are. How sweet and naive you can be.

Not to say he isn’t overly jealous and possessive, he just won’t pitch a fit in public.

LIKE dragging him to the bar with your friends and he sits at the table with all of your drinks. Him watching you dancing out of the corner of his eye, seeing some prat come up and grab your ass in passing. Or a group of guys dancing with your friends getting a little *too* close to you for his liking. He doesn’t do anything while the two of you are out- not wanting to ruin your fun. But that night after you’ve gotten back to his flat (He insisted. Closer to the bar. Uber was cheaper.) and he’s tearing your miniskirt off like it’s personally offended him. He’ll be a little rougher. A little more liberal with the marks his mouth leaves on your collarbones and inner thighs. His strong hands will grab at the fat of your hips a little harder than he should- leaving bruises where his fingers dug in. He’ll lean over you while you’re split open with his length, snarling down at you. “Had everyone’s attention tonight, didn’t you, pet?“ “You like havin’ eyes on you?” “Greedy fuckin’ slag.” “Can’t appreciate what you have.” “Need a reminder of who you’ve got to impress.” Maybe he’ll take you in front of a mirror, massive hand fixed on your jaw. Jerking your face up so you have to look at yourself being ruined by him. How pretty and slutty you look when your makeup is ruined by the tears he’s fucking out of you.

- He calls you ‘bird’ or ‘pet’ more often than anything else. A little on the nose for how he treats you. Like you’re some small, frail thing that can’t go a day without him. Stripped of your natural survival instincts and instead leaning on him for support and comfort and food and shelter. Just how he likes it.

GOD he’s a fucking freak. Gross and mean and fucked in the head. Makes my stomach hurt. I hate him. I wish I was schizophrenic so I could vividly hallucinate him.

[castielsprostate]

uhm anyway this is my official script outline proposal for venom vs spiderfriend / spiderman 4 / venom 4 !

cockroach!venom is travelling to new york all by himself (the the barman is there too because it's just really funny) while we follow eddie having thee worst day he's ever had. he stubs his toe getting out of bed in the morning, his coffee order is wrong and spills on his shirt, he drops his laptop on the concrete, he loses every lead he had on an investigation, a bird shits on his shoulder, it starts to rain and he doesn't have an umbrella, he gets hit by a street puddle a cab drives through, a fling he's "trying" breaks everything off over text message (gender ambiguous), and then when he's crossing the street he gets fucking BODIED by a truck. he gets rushed to the hospital, barely alive, major trauma, broken bones, brain bleed, cardiac arrest, and before he goes he says, "see you soon, buddy," whilst clutching his lady liberty keychain in his hands

cut to spiderman, doing spideythings on earth 616, swinging through the city of new york,

meanwhile, cock!venom is vroaching it up on the other side of the city, going from alley to alley, dodging cars and pedestrians, barely evading death, looking into windows searching for something, making tiny, whiny little alien sounds. he finds a tasty little treat (rat brains) in between and as he's about to munch spiderman's ass squashes him from falling through a marvel sparkles universe hole. venom attaches himself to spiderman and they are an absolute hate at first sight. by GOD does venom hate peter and does peter try to get rid of venom any and all opportunities! "YOU" "what me?" "YOU ARE THE RED BLUE MAN FROM TV" "well... yeah? i'm spiderman? can you get out of my body please??" venom does not, in fact, get out of his body, but they fight some alley bad guys, one calls spiderman an "uptight fruity" and venom goes ballistic. they fight together, badly, because neither of them is strong enough to control the other and then they fight each other before realising it's pointless. venom ends saying "don't let guys like that get you down, bug, sing your own song, dance to your own beat, it's what we do" to peter when they're done fighting and peter just goes ???

eddie is still dying in the hospital, medically induced coma, anne arrives with dan, they mourn him, getting told there's no chance of survival anymore. they're keeping him alive for mrs chen to say her goodbyes, and unhooking his life support in two days. capcut dream montage where he's raising a family together with venom, eddie says, "this is a life i like better,". that's normal behaviour

spideyvenom is being followed by some woodchippers, venom explains NOTHING to the spider man because they doesn't like the spider man. they have a day where they try to find out whats going on, barely working together, but good enough to find out some information. they have an alleycat fight and venom reveals that he's looking for someone "special to us" after coming all the way from nevada, and peter goes "ah.. mr venom, she must be important to you for you to travel all this way, huh?" "yes, insect... he is important to us" and spiderman goes O.O and then tries to help but no one's heard of an "eddie brock". the city, in the meantime, becomes jittery and weird, and something big is coming. something big and wrong. they go on a venom bender and meet the barman in an underground (gay) club in nyc and have a fun (for venom. terrible for spidey and the barman) night out

eddie is dying, slowly, in the hospital, unresponsive to everyone and everything. mrs chen says a tearful goodbye, leaving a bar of chocolate on his bedside table, anne stays with eddie whilst dan goes with mrs chen to get some food. she holds his hand, cries, maybe. she says, through tears,"i wish he could've protected you longer"

spideyvenom are doing what they can to protect people (venom eats a few of them), swinging through the city when more marvel sparkles appear. by god. that's a lot of fucking marvel sparkles. that's. that's too many marvel sparkles. the sky opens up, there really isn't a lot of time left, the something big, something wrong is here.

swinging through new york, spideyman is listing off everything that's going very, very wrong, trying to evacuate as many people, when venom spots eddie, barely, through a top floor hospital window. in reality he actually spots anne, throwing everything on a hail mary, and decides to crash them into the hospital window. anne ducks to protect eddie, spiderman takes off his mask in anger, "mr venom what the hell??? we HAVE to go, NOW,". venom rejects himself from spiderman, launching him out of the window, and jumping onto eddie, trying to be absorbed, "eddie?... eddie... eddie.. eddie. eddie eddie eddie eddie eddie eddie eddie eddie eddie!! eddie!!! eddie!!!! eddie!!!!! eddie!!!!!!! eddie!!!!!!!!!! eddie!!!!!!!!!!!!! EDDIE!!!!!!!!!!!!,"

venom goes to anne, looking at eddie, "why isn't our other waking up? what is wrong with our eddie, anne?". "venom, i'm so sorry."

so venom, without thinking, without any hold back, makes anne perform cpr, just enough to flow into eddie. just. barely. enough. and he brings eddie back again, slamming him back into life, waking up another codex in the process, but he doesn't care. because their eddie is back, and eddie is waking up.

eddie says, whilst reaching up to his chest, "hey buddy, i just had the-," "weirdest dream, eddie,"

silence, for a moment, the camera is only focused on them sitting in eddie's glass covered hospital bed before,

"am i dead? are we dead? is this it?" "no, eddie, we are alive," and eddie presses their foreheads together, gently, with no urgency. just relief. eddie gripping the back of venom's goop, entangling his fingers, wanting to feel venom engulf him again. the moment is cut short by spiderman jumping through ANOTHER window "what in the hell are you doing mr. venom??? we have to clear the city, now, we don't have any time for this"

freaked out, a little soggy, eddie says, "venom, that's th-the-the peter guy from tv from the the purple man universe" "yes eddie, we do not like him," "why is the peter guy from tv in here, why does he know who we are,"

spiderman goes ???, eddie braces himself for a fight, gripping venom tighter, he isn't going to lose him again so soon, "listen sweetie, we aren't going anywhere," whilst gesturing to him and venom, "what is going on here?"

something rumbles the ground, anne yelps, spiderman is up and out another window, "no time, gotta swing, we need to evacuate the city,"

eddie is up, getting anne to safety, she says "don't let him go, venom," before venom is filling him in on everything that happened and being shot into battle in his hospital gown. they full body, venom seeps into every part of eddie, impossibly further than any time before, and eddie lets him in

"we have a new tattoo, eddie?" "got it a while back, it's the," "codex?" "codex,"

they save a few people on their way down, venom eats a few bad guys, "you got a new tattoo, too, huh bud?" "it looks cool on us" they find spiderman and, despite their mutual dislike, team up and [epic battle here]. cool co-ops with veddie launching spiderman, spiderman webbing bad guys like a little burrito for venom to eat, eddie does a few kickflips and gets launched by spiderman to get some up-top threats. and the threat isn't clear, it's not knull, it's not more xenophages, it's something neither of them has seen before, and it just keeps coming... until the sky clears up in an instant. like it was snapped away, and spiderman is marvel sparkled back before any of them know what's happening, "mr venom??" "insect! see you never"

half of the city is destroyed (in true marvel hero style), venom and eddie have to get out of there quickly before anyone gets a too good look.

the final scene of venom and eddie is them sitting in central park, debris magically cleaned up, venom safely tucked in eddie's shirt saying some venom-y nonsense and alien purring, two new chickens who they named roan and gaga pecking away by their feet, looking off into the sunset. eddie whispers, "but i like any life with us best," and venom intertwines their hands

spiderman gets marvelsparkled back into the mcu, having the wildest story to tell, and having so so so many questions, with having none answered because it's Doom's Day.

[dingustripas]

I just finished watching Glass Onion for the third time so now you get to hear my rant about it but the details are out of order in the timeline because I’m lazy

(SPOILERS AHEAD)

When Miles lifts the gun off of Duke, we can actually see it pre-Blanc explaining it. The scene where the two hug you can see Miles take the gun and slip it into the back of his jeans.

Following the gun thing, we, the viewers actually SEE the gun itself (pre-Blanc’s explanation) when Miles goes back to the mini bar to put it in the ice bucket. Although it’s kind of hard to see it’s very clearly a gun but our eyes manipulate our minds into thinking it’s a drink because it is indeed a minibar.

They show how Miles places the drink in Dukes hand pre Blanc’s explanation but quickly distract us with the groups dynamic and Birdie.

Phillip is skeptical of Helen when she asks for Blanc, we can assume that he and Blanc have had negative run ins with people from jobs. Also Phillip might be judging Helen’s character, who she is, because he doesn’t want to put Blanc into a situation where he’s in true danger. He’s a detective not Batman.

Birdies mask at the beginning of the movie at the boat is just fucking chains across her face in diamond pattern.

Blanc doesn’t have a gag reflex when the dude in the white suit puts Miles “covid vax” down his throat. (Bc he’s 🏳️‍🌈)

Andi, when she first comes up with the idea for Alpha and starts working with Miles, is wearing dark colors. The dark blue pinstripe suit, her completely black ensamble when we see her at the Glass Onion (the bar). But when she’s challenging Miles she’s wearing both Black and white. At the trial she’s wearing a light almost off white suit. Why is this important? Because what color is Helen wearing when she shuts miles down? White. The color white is, in itself, a color that symbolizes Miles downfall.

Connecting back to the white idea, Whiskey is wearing all white (her bathing suit) when she reveals crucial information about Miles giving her the Taurus necklace for her birthday. (Which leads to his downfall when Blanc puts 2+2 together that he killed Andi)

“Im really bad at dumb things” -Blanc. The reason he didn’t catch on to what was going on with Miles earlier was because Miles is stupid. Miles is so dumb that he fucking befuddled Blanc because Miles is so stupid.

Blanc isn’t uncomfortable about his arousal around Birdie when she put her legs up on him while Miles talks about being ‘Disrupters’. He’s uncomfortable because he’s GAY and has a BOYFRIEND/HUSBAND.

There’s a bunch of owls and small trinkets of birds in Birdies room.

The movie, at the very beginning, with Miles mystery invitation box thing hints at where the envelope is hidden. The fibonacci sequence on the box has the center blocked out in black, where we will later see in the film is red which is where Miles is hiding the envelope. For fucks sake the movie even goes out of its way, with Dukes mother, to point out the sequence. (“The first one’s a fibonacci sequence” -Dukes mom).

During the dinner Whiskey is wearing the same golden chain body jewelry that Birdie was wearing earlier at the pool. So this could mean two things: 1. They have the same chain and 2. Whiskey borrowed the chain from Birdie.

Now connecting to my first point about the chain jewelry above. The reason why Miles likes Whiskey, despite her sleeping with him for the sake of Dukes channel, is because Whiskey reminds him of younger Birdie. Birdie even talks to Peg about how dazzled and amazed Miles was when he first met her and how she wishes it was like that again. Then when they’re smashing the glass sculptures, the first thing Whiskey smashes is a sculpture of a bird. Hence smashing Miles perception of her as another person he can use like he used Birdie.

“You have him turn around so he can have deniability” -Aaron Burr in Hamilton (Basically what Blanc was thinking when he walked out of the room)

When Blanc is trying to light his cigar in the “Smokeless garden” the reason the alarms go off is because because just the smoke and small flames from Blanc’s cigar could cause “another Hindenburg”.

The ending scene with Helen and Blanc after Blanc asks her if she’s ready to go home, Helen’s sitting stance mimics the Mona Lisa. Miles said “It all started with her” in reference to his success being inspired by the Mona Lisa. But it all ended with Helen and her stance at the end mimicking the Mona Lisa is meant to represent that. The beginning and end of Miles Bron.

Blanc refers to alchol as offering Helen “some courage”. Ofc as we all know alcohol is commonly referred to as “Liquid Courage”.

We should’ve known Miles was the killer for this simple reason: The glass he handed to Duke. Duke dying holding Miles’s glass is literally like a signed note. Duke died with Miles name literally written on the crime scene.

[anonymouscheeses]

Obvious shit I noticed part 3 (spoilers for welcome to heaven)

Look at her! "Teehee"

Also she's nervous! Foreshadowing omg 🤯

STICKERS! Two pride stickers and a cute donut. Gives me an idea to draw Chaggie at a donut shop while everything is burning down <3 (I'll probably do it but if any artist wants to as well go ahead!)

*CHOKES ON COFFEE* I LOVE THEM. I'M SORRY I GET SO GIDDY WHEN THEY HAVE EVEN THE SMALLEST INTERACTION BUT UGHHH I NEED MORE, IT WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH 🙏🙏

KISSY! MWA! *SCREAMS INTO THE VOID*

Vivzie give me more, moar now. MOAR

DAMN. SHE CAN THROW- or maybe it just exaggerates the perspective in this frame but still- ZAMNNN

Cherri x Sir Pentious fans RISE UP.

I wasn't ever really a fan of it myself but I always thought it was CUTE. Like 3 seconds before this part I was already begging for them to kiss 😭

More foreshadowing!

AAAAAA CREEPY BIRD THINGS!!!

Oh wait- Sera's hot and Emily's already adorable

If heaven don't look like what this is in the show, I DONT WANT IT! (THATS A JOKE PLEASE DON'T SMITE ME)

JEALOUS GIRLFRIEND VAGGIE!! Can I just say how much I love Vaggie's face expressions? Not just here but like all the time. She's just made to be so exaggerated, out of all of them I thought it would be Charlie who would have the most dramatic faces but Vaggie wins it for me. I JUST GIGGLE SO HARD WHEN SHE LOOKS LIKE THIS BAHAHAH

Okay yeah. It's very obvious now. Vaggie is definitely an ex-exterminator. They don't close in on Charlie here so it's made to subtly nudge the attention to Vaggie. HOW DID THEY IMMEDIATELY NOTICE IT WAS HER THO??

Hot-

That's it.

SHARE THAT MOTHUSSY GIRL-

YOU'RE TELLING ME SHE GREW OUT ALL OF THAT HAIR?!? YEAH ITS BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE THEN BUT STILL AJJSJD.

But overall the design is pretty meh. I always loved the idea of short hair Vaggie and even have seen art of it but it's just yknow, alright. Reminds me of Cassandra from Tangled: the series. IM LISTENING TO ONE OF THE SONGS RIGHT NOW HELPPP

THIS SCENE HERE! WOOOOO! SO GLAD WE KNOW WHEN AND WHERE THEY FIRST MET!! Wish we got it extended tho. And also probably push it to next episode so it would have a better impact(atleast I think thats when they'll have the duet). BUT WHATEVER SOMETHING IS BETTER THAN NOTHING! or uh whatever

Vaggie must've been a bit terrified at first. The only sinner she ever sent mercy to was a child. Then to see someone who to her is an adult sinner who just looks really human, that must be crazy. BUT THEN IF SHE WAS TOLD THAT CHARLIE WAS ACTUALLY THE PRINCESS OF HELL? HOOOO, LOCK IN AND STEAL HER. THAT'S SOME WATTPAD SHIT. Also, I wonder how long Charlie thought of redeeming sinners. It would make sense to be after meeting Vaggie, since it could have been a wake up call to the fact not all sinners are bad people. Even though Vaggie isn't a sinner technically, Charlie didn't know that at the time. But maybe Charlie was always like this but just needed to meet someone who could start her dream with her. Long rant uhhh

Haha penis 🫵

SCRAP WHATEVER I SAID IN THE FIRST PART. THEY PROBABLY DO FUCK- OR DONT?? I DONT KNOW- ANYWAY LESBIAN SEX (BOTTOM TEXT). WHY DO I CARE SO MUCH??? SOMEONE PULL THE TRIGGER.

Lute looks like a basic asf anime gorl. Adam doesn't ever take his helmet off, or maybe he just can't. OH HE'S DOING THE GAY SIGN 💅💅 Very appropriate for what he's saying

Mentor, apprentice. I love that Husk is just trying to help Angel grow but isn't going to force him into it if he doesn't want to.

Im not a fan of huskerdust and think they'd be better friends as I can't imagine a relationship with them at all. But it's still nice and they are supportive of eachother so that's like- yknow. Basic rules. Or something like that. (HELP. I ruined it all at the last part)

I- girl- WHY IS SHE GROWLING?? GRR GRR RR (INSERT TWILIGHT SAGA HERE)

VAGGIE'S FACE. SENDS ME. WHO GAVE HER THESE OVERDRAMATIC EXPRESSIONS, I APPLAUD YOU RGAGAGA

Ooo... I didnt like this part at all... Instead of making the choice she just runs off. Then because the plot demands it, Adam says nothing. Kinda whish she atleast avoided the question, maybe in some way that would require actual thinking? For a character like Vaggie, she could choose either way and it feel like it's still her. If she chose to protect Charlie's dream, she would still be perfectly loyal to her but in the act of so would reveal a secret that could harm their relationship(which does happen at the end but that's because the plot wanted it like that). If she chose to side with Adam, she'd be hurting Charlie emotionally, sure, but it would keep a secret that could make Charlie see Vaggie less than who she is to her already(atleast what Vaggie might think would happen). Imo it should've been her deciding to protect Charlie, since it would mean she's devoted to her at all times.

ANOTHER THING! IF SHE COULDN'T MAKE THE CHOICE, THAT IS SOMETHING INTERESTING TO GO INTO. Maybe it could go deeper into how Vaggie doesn't know who she is without Charlie. So when she has a choice to make, like here, she can't do it without feeling the need to ask Charlie. BUT NOOO, YA HAD TO GO WITH THIS!! Wow. That was a long ass rant. Wtf 😭

Maybe I'm a dumbass. Maybe they'll talk about that next episode, but still, atleast touch on it a bit to not seem rushed?

Angel looking out for his kids like a mom. We always did need the motherly figure, the one closest to that being Charlie but girl needs a mother in her life too(damn, wait, I did her so dirty).

Huh, so why does it work here then? 🤨🤨 if it was said in the contract that Valentino can do whatever he wants only in the studio, then why is this the exception? 🤨🤨

Yes I'm stupid. Why do you ask? (No genuinely what's happening here)

OH ITS THE IMAGE! I really like Sera so far, hope we get more of her soon or in season 2.

Now that we know the context of this, yeah, that's fucking insane. And badass. WOMEN.

HMM. THATS STRANGE. DID YOU NOT FOR ONCE THINK THERE COULD BE A POSSIBILITY SHE MIGHT HAVE BEEN AN ANGEL? Okay I probably wouldn't either but I have an excuse, I'm an idiot. Some girl with a standing out outfit, with one eye, looks unusually human, right after/during the extermination... that's pretty solid ass proof. But I'm dumb so don't take anything i say seriously :D

Imagine this. No- shit. Just-

JUST LOOK! THEY ARE SO CUTE! EVEN THOUGH CRAZY SHIT IS HAPPENING.

*SWEATS*

Vaggie is DESPERATE. PLEADING. That's obvious yeah, but don't mind me I had nothing to say for the last 3 images I just thought they were cool

I mean. Slay I guess. 😍💅

Do all the exterminators look similar or is it just Lute and Vaggie? 🤨

Even though Vaggie and Charlie may be going through this horrible thing with a hard punch in the gut, but Vaggie is always going to comfort her and I just think that's so adorable.

Also Adam looks like a chicken hah.

Everyone fears to be like Lucifer. If they don't do bad things they believe are for the greater good and make sacrifices that put them higher than those in hell, they could themselves be fallen. It's really interesting but I don't know if it's going to be fleshed out enough with the amount of episodes left. Which also worries me about everything else that still hasn't be concluded. There's gonna be loose strings I just know it. Hopefully though they rather do that then rush everything out y'know?

I want the next episode to be mostly focused on Vaggie and Charlie's relationship and the healing of what happened. Not for the entire episode of course, it would feel drawn out if it did, but atleast address the problem for the first like I would say 10 minutes? Then the rest would focus on one or two loose threads while also having Vaggie and Charlie acting upon moving on. That's just my idea but yeah-

[sakura1uvr]

Well.. it was a party alright

- Smut

A/N: I don't know how to write gay sex so pls forgive me for being very bad at it ☹☹☹

Pairing: Minji (Newjeans) x f!Y/N

Warning: friends with benefits, sex for the first time, kissing

Requested: by fav moot @pandoraha

It was a cold night. You were at a random party, bored out of your damn mind. Your friends went off with some randoms and you were left alone. There were a couple of guys that asked you to dance but you weren't interested since well you already had been crushing on someone for a while. As you drink a cup of mixed alcohol you grab your phone and decide to text your best friend, Minji to pick you up.

After sending the text, you glance around the room, your mind wandering to thoughts of Minji. You’ve always loved how effortlessly charming she was, her laughter lighting up any space. She could easily make friends with anyone, but tonight she chose you. You sip your drink, trying to stave off the chill that has settled in from the cold, yet warm surroundings.

A few minutes later you get a text from Minji telling you that she arrived. You throw the plastic red cup in the trash, grab your things and head out.

You get to the car and open the door. You slide inside. "What a shitty day.. Can you drop me off home Minji?"

Minji just laughs and starts the car again. "Of course princess."

Minji had a habit of calling you weird couply pet names but this time it felt different. Heat rushed to your face when she called you that. It was weird.

After a good while you finally stop at your house. "Thanks Min."

But before you could get up Minji grabs your arm. You sit back down and look at her.

"Min what's wrong?" Right when you ask that she grabs your face and kisses you. It was normal for you guys to kiss randomly but this felt different. It felt like more intense and more desireble.

Your heart raced as the warmth of her lips pressed against yours. The world outside faded into a blurred backdrop, the muffled sounds of the cars driving by turned into complete silence. You could feel how soft her plump lips were, how inviting it felt to kiss them. Like it was her way of letting you that you can do whatever you desired to her.

The kiss deepened, each movement of the kiss just made the time go by slower and slower. Your fingers instinctively tangled in her hair, pulling her closer, wishing the warmth of her body could chase away every chill. For so long, you had hidden your feelings, convincing yourself it was just a fleeting crush, but in that moment, all those thoughts shattered like glass.

You truly had a crush on Minji for a while and it was pretty obvious to both you and her.

“Min,” you breathed against her lips, the air thick with an undeniable tension. "What are you doing?" You say inbetween kisses as Minji unbuttoned your shirt. You haven't done things like these let alone with your best friend. "I am tired of just kissing and then ending it off there.." Her voice was low, velvety, and the admission made your heart leap like a trapped bird desperate for freedom.

You could taste the sweet mixture of her fruity lip gloss and the alcohol on your tongues as you explored eachother's mouths, longing to feel more.

She takes off your clothes so now you were only in your underwear. Minji started kissing down from your jaw to your neck.

With her fingers still wrapped around your arm, Minji leaned in again, her perfectly manicured nails digging into your skin just enough to send another surge of pleasure coursing through you. “Is this okay?” she asked, her voice a whisper, heavy with anticipation.

“Yes,” you breathed, the simple word laden with the weight of desire that had been simmering beneath the surface for far too long.

She placed her hands on your hips, helping you grind across her leg. "Fuck you're so wet.. Not bad for your first time huh.?"

She moves one of her hands from your hip and unclasps your bra and takes it off, kissing around your chest and leaving bite marks so anyone who wanted to get a taste of you would know who you belong to. Her and only her.

"Min.. please i can't take it anymore.." Minji chuckles at your comment and pulls away. "What do you need baby?"

You sigh as she says that. "I need you... inside me Minji." "Fuck.. say my name again baby.." Minji sweared. Your breathless voice could make her cum alone. "Minji.."

It didn't take Minji a second to take off your damp panties and start massaging your puffy clit with her fingers. You start to shiver when you realize how cold it was.

Closing your eyes shut, you nuzzle into Minji's neck. Trying your best to hold back your own moans. This felt new, you haven't felt pleasure like this in your life let alone with the person you were inlove with.

Minji pushes two fingers inside you, your eyes widen at the new feeling. She still continues to stroke your clit as she pumps her fingers deep inside your pussy, hitting all the best spots.

"Min.. this feels so.. good." You look at Minji and kiss her again, wrapping your hands around her neck as she starts going even faster.

"Awww sweetheart..are you overwhelmed? Am i making you feel good?"

You nod. Trying your best to not pass out right then and there.

The sound of your wet pussy could be heard outside the car much less your muffled moans and slight screams against Minji's swollen lips. Minji was really enjoying herself.

You feel a slight knot tighten in your stomach. "Minji," You moan out her name against her soft lips. "I.. feel weird.." you say inbetween kisses.

"Don't worry baby, it will all make sense soon." She feels your pussy tighten around her fingers. Indicating that you were getting closer to your high.

Scuffing against her fingers as she pumped them inside you, you feel like you are about to leak.

"Minji... i'm super close.." Minji shushed you as she started to fasten her pace into your soft pussy.

And right at that moment you felt everything start crashing down. You finally reached the high both of you were longing for. Your legs shaking, you ride out your high on Minji's fingers. As you finish Minji pulls out her fingers. Cleaning them up with an extra towel she owned.

"Aww sweetie.." You wrapped you hands around her, cuddling her. "Come on now honey.. let's get dressed." Minji picked up your clothes that were scattered across the car and helps you put them on. She grabs your things and you guys go to your house.

She lays you down on your bed, resting with you. Minji covers you both with a blanket as you guys cuddle together. You soon fall asleep and Minji notices that. She kisses you good night and goes to sleep with you.

[heartwrrm]

it's immediately clear that both the creature and victor find some of their greatest comforts in nature and that's one of the key features that connects them and proves they're not so different from each other, but i've also noticed that they tend to admire different TYPES of nature

victor tends to amaze at "the high and snowy mountains [...] immense glaciers [...] the rumbling thunder of the falling avalanche [...] the supreme and magnificent mont blonc" (65), typically finding the most comfort in the "savage and enduring scenes" (64) which tend to be colder and rougher yet unchanging; while the creature found that his "chief delights were the sight of the flowers, the birds, and all the gay apparel of summer" (94). there is probably something to be said about the creature's affinity for spring and summer, the seasons of rebirth, of NATURAL and beautiful life, a direct contrast to his unnatural, coldly scientific, "wretched" rebirth that he abhors so much

i was discussing this idea with a friend, who added that victor finding solace in the frozen and dead beauty of wintery environments, a typically less-favoured season, could reflect how victor often refuses himself the typical joys of life. throughout the novel, he struggles with his self-worth because of the guilt induced by his creation of the creature and the deaths that then followed, and the only reason he even desires peace and comfort is because he knows he needs to present himself that way to his family in order for them to be happy ("i [...] wished that peace would revisit my mind only that i might afford them consolation and happiness" [62]). i built on her idea by noting how the creature acknowledged that he "required kindness and sympathy; but [he] did not believe [him]self unworthy of it" (94), a completely contrasting stance from victor, who finds himself undeserving of the many comforts offered to him by his family

furthermore, it seems that victor finds beauty in glory & majesty ("[the scenery] spoke of a power mighty as Omnipotence--and i ceased to fear, or to bend before any being less almighty than that which had created and ruled the elements" [64]), while the creature finds beauty in warmth & growth. both characters seem to find what they desire(d) in the versions of the natural world that they admire most

to reference what i said in the beginning about the connections between victor and the creature, this observation only contributes to my understanding that victor and the creature are incredibly similar, and many of their identical traits involve a rejection or a reversal of the other; they both ardently wish for each other's destruction, they both ruined each other, they're the reason that the other is simultaneously a victim and a villain in their own sense, they both hate themselves but for reversed reasons (victor hates himself for what he's done rather than what he is, while the creature hates himself for what he is more than what he's done), and now this--they both find solace in nature, just opposing kinds. like father, like son

[captainkirkk]

✩ WEEKLY FIC ROUND-UP ✩

All the fics I’ve read and really enjoyed in the past week-ish. Reminder: This list features any and all ratings and themes. Please look at tags and warnings on ao3 before reading.

DC

midnight sun by merils

Who would win: four men with guns who just happened to get Red Robin to walk into a trap, or one royally-pissed Kryptonian juggernaut?

Yeah, it's not even a contest.

reasons are better than rules by destiny919

"No one will actually explain Father's rules to me," Damian blurts out. "They tell me we don't kill, and killing is wrong, and Father would never do it, but no one ever actually says why! As if repeating the rule is the same as explaining it! As if I am supposed to just know, when I do not!"

Drake is quiet, eyes on something in the distance that Damian cannot see. "Damian, may I tell you a secret?"

Marvel

Thirty Hours by polaroid15

The sun sets. Peter breaks three toes and hits his head hard against concrete. There’s a steadily bleeding wound in his side that he’s staunched with his webbing and tries not to acknowledge it when it burns. He can still walk in a straight line, which is good. He’s starving and tired and cold. It’s been fifteen hours.

Or, Peter doesn't take any breaks during a lengthy fight with the Avengers. The mind-melting fever that follows really should have been expected.

Clone Wars

An Hourglass In Hand by ecarian

“I thought daemons didn’t eat,” Rex noted once, during a celebration feast, as he and Cody watched Boga devour her meal with some fascination. Varactyl she may be, but she was a tiny one. There wasn't much interior space for the truly momentous amount of meat she was ripping into.

Boga daintily rubbed her beak against a folded serviette that looked kind of like a bird, and said, prim, “I can do anything a human can do.”

“Oh?” Obi-Wan said mildly, from where he’d been tapping at a datapad. “Shall I save you a portion of these reports then?”

Set My Mind at Ease by Eightbitpale

Marshal Commander Cody - clone commanding officer of the 7th Sky Corps, second in command of the 212th attack battalion and, currently, the proud caretaker of one still-warm lightsaber - was having a very long day.

Actually, fuck that. It had been more than a long day. Long days were Cody’s bread and butter, practically his comfort zone. Marshall Commander Cody ate stim shots for breakfast and every shiny this side of Coruscant knew it. Long days were his bitch.

No, this had been more than a long day. Today had been a bad day.

———

The one where Cody and his general try their best to tell each other that they care. At least they’re trying.

Your Smile In Stone by ecarian

Wooley: can we arrest people for yelling this early?

There were two figures standing at the foot of General Kenobi's statue with their backs to Wooley, an adult with a hood, and a child with light hair. The child was pointing at a puddle of Temple tookas who were curled up in General Kenobi’s lap, lounging in the stone folds of his robes, the bend of his knee.

Wooley: belay that. Child nuisance.

The Goblin Emperor

Sweet Hope by baladric

Maia Drazhar arranges a festival, meets his gay aunt, falls in love with his secretary, and misses his mom through it all.

"In the way of true stories, there was no discernible beginning. Perhaps it had begun that first day, in the shabby receiving room at Edonomee; in the cockpit of the Radiance of Cairado; at the mooring mast of the Untheileneise Court, with that first smile.

The pith of the matter was that Maia Drazhar was wildly, tremulously in love, and love had made fools of much wiser men than he."

In All Its Forms by Anonymous

Before his father ruined everything, Nurevis Chavar only thought to introduce the new emperor to all the most beautiful things life could offer.

When he found himself free from relegation again after his father's death, would the emperor whose friendship he had sought so long ago wish his presence at court? And, if he could return to court, would his emperor wish his friendship again?

[anime-grimmy]

Soooo, you've probably noticed Ive been replaying HZD recently so my mind's been stuck on the franchise for a while.

I finally took the time to actually try and experience Burning Shores for the first time, this time with an unbiased opinion.

Bcs, ngl, when it came out, I was very negative towards it for a couple of reasons. It already started out with me not being able to freaking play this DLC, even though I was so excited for it, cos while HFW was on PS4, the DLC wasnt. And Im wasnt going to buy a whole ass PS5 just for a DLC.

(I will get it once I buy a PS5 for MH Wilds though).

And then, ofc, the elephant in the room - Seyka, or rather Aloy's relationship with her.

I'll preface this with, though it should be obvious with my content, I do NOT have a problem with Aloy being in a gay relationship.

What rly irked me, and honestly still irks me, is that Aloy finally gets to experience new feelings IN A FUCKING DLC. AN EXTENSION A LOT OF THE PLAYERBASE WONT PLAY.

The second reason I didnt enjoy this decision was bcs it felt so rushed. I mean, we're talking about Aloy here! Miss "I dont have time for feelings bcs I gotta save the world"! Miss "I barely just learnt to let others in"!

From what Ive heard, the DLC is over the course of a few weeks/months, so it's not like they fell in love just like that, but Ive also heard that while playing you do not get a feel for that passage of time. I'll have to experience that for myself though.

Now that Ive had some distance from the franchise though, my feelings have changed a bit

Im not going to lie and say I now loooove this decision. No, I am still miffed such enourmous character developement for Aloy is stuck IN A DLC. Not to mention that it was such a bold move to try this with a new character, cos this relationship being perceived well hinges on the player liking Seykay and that fast. Imo she's a fine character but also nothing special.

Now, I do have to say, I am really happy that Aloy has finally come so far that she allows such intimate feelings to develop, or rather, that the devs let her be this way. I know a lot of us still perceive Aloy as this single minded protag, that wont let anyone in bcs "the mission is too important", so Im glad Guerilla shows us that Aloy has undergone quite the growth.

Im also pleasantly surprised that Guerilla has the guts to include romance for Aloy, bcs they were one leg in the "strong women need no (wo)men" pit, so it's great to see they dont let Aloy fall into that trope.

Now, for the FUN part.

I actually have a conspiracy theory, ie I am gaslighting myself on why such a big thing is stuck in a DLC.

I think Guerilla is testing the waters to see how players react. I am pretty sure they can gather the data on what dialogue options players used, so Im thinking this:

Guerilla is trying to gauge the player reaction on a) Aloy developing feelings, b) players thinking Aloy is ready/willing for a relationship, c) same sex relationships. They tried killing quite a few birds with one stone.

I have seen quite a few teasing, winky face posts and replies from Guerilla staff about romance options in the third installment, so my guess (delusion) is that the relationship is hidden in the DLC so Guerilla can plan on how much and obvious to include several romance options in the last title.

I know this is all just wishful thinking, but even if Seyka is a good character, I hope to fucking god that they dont just take that relationship decision away from us, esp with a character bound to a DLC.

Guerilla gave us such a wonderful cast of characters over the last two games, and if they want to give Aloy an "end game" in the third title, I hope they do let us choose with who. Or at least I hope they dont force a relationship we cant choose onto us.

Cos as much as Aloy is her own person, it is still US that make the decisions in game. Through our individual playstyles , we give Aloy our own interpretation. Now, we cant change her core values, but still, I hope to GAIA that Guerilla will give us enough wiggle room.

(Guerilla, Im begging you, Ive already waited 8 years, please dont let my ship sink)

[watarfallar]

Does anyone here like this weird thing called "Desert Duo Incorrect Quotes?" No? Oh well. I'm running out so I'm giving as many as I can to you all. Enjoy it!

Scar: My hands are cold. Grian: Here, let me hold them. Scar: My lips are cold too. Grian: *covers Scar's mouth with their hand*

Grian: I want to kiss you. Scar, not paying attention: What? Grian: I said if you die, I wont miss you.

Grian: Being gay is a constant battle between "I wish to sit on a window bench with my lover, our legs tangling as we listen to the birds" and "Hey, let's go throw rocks at fascists" and I think that's very sexy of us. Scar: If the window's open and you time it right, you can do both.

Scar, to Grian: We had a date! Scar: *aggressively points to Hello Kitty Coloring Book*

Scar: I warned you. Scar: I'm perfect.

Grian: Please, Scar, after everything we’ve been through together. You can’t do this. Grian: I’m sorry Scar. Grian: I’m begging you. Don’t do it. Scar: It has to be done. Grian: Scar: Grian: Scar: *Places +4* Uno.

Scar: Are you packed for the trip? Grian: Yup. Scar: Then where are your bags? Grian: All I’m bringing is a good attitude and a sense of adventure. Scar: A change of underwear might be nice.

Grian: Just be careful, Scar! Scar: *heading out the door* I'm always careful, Grian! Scar: It's everything around me that's careless.

Grian: *Gives a bouquet to Scar* Scar: You know I'm allergic. Grian: That's the point.

Scar: Your future self is talking shit about you right now. Grian: Jokes on them. I'll ruin their fucking life.

Scar: Who the fuck- Grian: Language! Scar: Whom the fuck- Grian: No.

Scar: Ha! What are you gonna do? Stab me? *Five minutes later* Scar, calling 911: HELP, IVE BEEN STABBED.

Grian, looking at the squad: Okay, so I need to become a therapist faster.

Scar, handing a balloon to Grian: I have no soul. Have a good day! Grian, walking off: I don't have one either.

Scar: I’ve only ever said ‘I love you’ to two people in my entire life: Grian and a guy in a dark club who I mistook for Grian.

Grian: I found a note in one of my old word .docs that said Note to self: Get revenge on Scar. Grian: Except I couldn't remember what I was supposed to get revenge for. Grian: But I trusted my own judgment, so I went with it. Scar: Hmm... I don't know what you were supposed to get revenge for, either. Grian: I can only assume you got what was coming to you. Not 100 percent sure, though. Scar: Well, whatever I did, I guess I deserved it. Grian: Let that possibly be a lesson to you.

Grian: Oh, fiddlesticks. Scar: Look, I understand this is a tense situation, but let's watch the fucking language.

Grian: Heh, Scar sneezes like a girl. Scar: How about I pound you like boy? Scar: That didn’t come out right.

Grian: Consider the fundraising over! Your hero has arrived! Scar: Uhh… where did you get so much money from, Grian? Grian: Well, you know, I’m pretty good at numbers. I just crunched them, I stretched them, I analyzed my accounts, I timed the market- *police sirens start to wail in the background* Scar: DID YOU ROB A BANK?! Grian: Oh, come on, Scar, do you really think so little of me? *opens the bag as purple dye explodes on their face* Scar: Grian: …it was a credit union.

Scar, turning to Grian: Stop calling yourself hot, the only thing you can turn on is the microwave.

Grian: *trying to get five seconds of sleep* Scar, poking Grian’s arm: Grian Grian. Grian. Grian. Grian: WHAT? Scar: …We’re out of Capri Suns—

Grian: I’m not being weird. Am I being weird? Scar: Yes, and that’s coming from me.

Scar: And have you learnt anything this Christmas, Grian? Grian: …Not really. Scar: Nothing? Grian: Tell you one thing I have learnt—Christmas; ultimately, commercial holiday. Who's the real winner at Christmas? Amazon. they have drones now! Tiny little dystopian slaves delivering iPads and headphones. I ordered a toaster; It was on the doorstep five hours later! Do we need that? It was 4.99! For a toaster! I mean, someone's being exploited there.

Scar: Bottling up negative emotions is bad for your health, so you shouldn't do it. Grian: I know, that's why I bottle up all my emotions, both positive and negative, so it cancels out. Scar: Th-that's not how that works-

Scar: Priest kink is definitely a thing and I am afflicted by it. Grian: Go to church. Grian: WAIT—

Scar: Is it just me or is instant ramen even better uncooked? Grian: It’s just you.

[bigification]

Love, Lust, and Leather

"A public intoxication call at 4pm, really?" Daryl complained to his partner.

"These are always the fun ones huh." Ben replied.

"Well it's usually the night shift that's gotta deal with these assholes, why do they have to do this when we're on patrol." Daryl continued.

Ben just chuckled under his breath and shifted his focus back to the road. The two cops quickly pulled up to the bar and approached the entrance, dreading the interaction that was about to happen.

Just as Daryl reaches for the door, it suddenly opens. A suspicious looking man stumbles out of the bar and right into the pair of cops.

"You boys look like you're raring for a good time." The man chuckles.

Daryl shoots a confused look at his partner, "Male prostitute?"

Before Ben could respond, the man butts in. "Oh darling, you wish. I'm talking about you two, you've been stuck in that small car together for far too long to not have thought about what the other looks like under those charming uniforms." The man winks at Daryl.

"Okay, that's enough from you." Daryl reaches for his handcuffs.

"Oh that won't be necessary, I'll be on my way now." The mysterious man starts to walk away. The two cops attempt to grab him, but feel frozen in place. "Have fun you love birds!" The man chuckles as he slips away.

The two cops remain frozen as something begins to change. Their blue and brown uniforms begin to shift into a deep black leather. Their tops turn into expensive looking leather suits and their khaki pants turn to a similar glossy black leather. All their accessories turn into thick black leather with shiny silver accents, their belts, their boots, their gloves, and even their hats all transform.

However, it wasn't just the clothes that would change. Both young men seemed to age into their thirties as their short stubble grew into bushy beards and their hair shortened into a clean buzz cut. Their muscles began to grow, filling their leather clothes until they were skin tight. Their asses simultaneously perked up, filling in the space in their pants. And the bulge in their pants grew larger and larger as their cocks nearly doubled in length and girth. Finally, both of the men felt an itchiness engulf their bodies as thick hairs grew all over their bodies.

As the duo escaped their paralyzed state, all semblance of the cops they once were was now long gone. Memories of training to become a cop were replaced by nights at gay bars, drinking until they couldn't remember how many people they had fucked that night. The two shared a lustful look as Daryl grabbed his hand cuffs, and Ben grabbed his baton.

[pumpkinspiceeddie]

It’s finally Summer Exchange time bbs!@steddieonmywaywardson I hope I did your prompts justice :)

Part 1/2 🖤 part 2 here

Corroded Coffin Tattoo gets a new client that shakes up their summer.

Read on ao3 • Rated E • eventual steddie, platonic stobin, Corroded Coffin bros, Chrissy/Argyle mentioned, modern era, no UD, everyone ends up in Cali, slow burn (for me), inadvisable tattooing procedures, smut in part 2

Many thanks to the invaluable @fuctacles for fact checking and betaing my overzealous imagination and @lawrencebshoggoth for always hyping me up and dealing with my annoying self 🖤

Eddie looked down at his iPad calendar with a sigh. Three mainstream boring designs back to back. They paid the rent but he wished he could get to a point where he was tattooing what he actually wanted.

But then there was a consultation with a new client. Steve Harrington had met Argyle at a pool party and had apparently got drunk enough to show off his ‘wicked scars.’ Argyle immediately suggested Eddie to tattoo over them.

Getting the first message from a random Instagram asking about his availability and experience in covering scars had shocked him until the person explained. Scrolling through the stranger’s posts had been even more confusing. In most of his pictures he was either wrapped around a very cute — but obviously very gay — girl, or she was tagged as the photographer of the picture. Her page was much of the same, better edited pictures of them from the same day.

They’d gone back and forth with ideas (and banter) for almost a week in his Instagram DMs before Steve made the appointment. Had actually called the shop (no one did that) and asked about Eddie’s schedule. Argyle looked at him like he had three heads when he asked him to transfer the call to his office.

On the phone, Steve had been a bit more professional but somehow warm and friendly even talking about mundane things like his work schedule and Eddie found himself not wanting to hang up. Steve had asked specifically about one of Eddie’s favorite pieces, an eerie take on a harpy with disintegrating wings and an eagle skull for a face. Before he knew it, Eddie was pacing and waving his arms excitedly asking about what he had liked about it and what they could incorporate into Steve’s vision. Jeff had propped himself in his doorway with a knowing look until he got up and shut the door.

As he was cleaning up his station after the girl with the birds over her collarbone finally left, he froze in his tracks when a familiar face walked through the front door, sunlight catching all the highlights in his hair and turning his eyes more green than brown. His Instagram had not done him justice.

He quickly tried to pull his attention back to gathering up paper towels and rewrapping his gear. Get a hold of yourself, Munson. It’s just a normal consult. With a fucking beautiful male model-looking asshole (he wasn’t an asshole though) who he’d soon be getting to put his own work on and touch-

“Eddie! Steve is here,” Argyle thankfully turned his back to their lobby to smirk at him. All the guys had been teasing him this week after Eddie drunkenly gushed about him and the tattoo he’d soon get to do on him.

“Thanks, Argyle,” he huffed. “Give me a second.”

He quickly went to the bathroom to wash his hands and stare at himself in the mirror. “Be cool, dork. It’s a consult. Try to be fucking normal,” he hissed at his reflection. With a sigh, he went back out to face the music.

Suddenly he was in his tiny office in the back of the shop, overwhelmed by the delicious cologne or whatever it was that made Steve Harrington smell so fucking good.

Eddie poked at his iPad for a long moment like he’d never seen it before, feeling the weight of Steve’s eyes on him but refusing to look up. With a low frustrated noise, Eddie finally found the file he needed and almost threw the tablet into Steve’s lap.

“Uh. So th-this is what I’ve been messing around with. You know, since we talked. But we can change anything you don’t like! Whatever you want-“ he forced himself to stop talking as he finally allowed himself to look at Steve’s face.

“Wow, Eddie. This is, like, a lot different than I thought it would be.”

He felt his shoulders sag. Of course it sucked. No one liked his creepy creatures enough to have them on their bodies forever. He should just-

“Hey, no, that’s not what I meant.” Steve put his hand on his arm and Eddie looked up at him. “It’s awesome. Even better than I imagined. Can you tell me about it?”

Steve looked at him like no one else ever had when he’d shown them his work, actually interested and excited in way that made Eddie’s already fast heart stutter against his ribs.

“I-it’s, you know, you said you wanted a mermaid sea creature type thing. No tentacles,” he chuckled. Steve had been very adamant about that in their conversation, only giving Eddie that strict stipulation. That and no nudity, since he taught swimming lessons to kids and didn’t want to be paranoid about covering it.

Steve huffed a laugh but shuddered. Eddie let himself relax further.

“It’s essentially a creepy mermaid,” he said, reaching over to zoom into the drawing. “At first I was thinking sirens, you know, luring boats to their death, but they’re actually half birds and not underwater. This way we can play around with the tail or hair or bubbles or waves or whatever to cover anything we need to.”

Steve stared unblinkingly at his drawing with wide eyes. “It’s perfect. I love how dark and ominous it is. That’s really what I like about your art, Eds. It has so much raw emotion in it. She looks otherworldly and so sad.”

Eddie sucked in a breath at both the nickname and the compliment. No one had ever grasped the intricacies of his art, usually shrugging it off as horror or fantasy.

“Y-yeah,” he cleared his throat. “Thanks. Really. That’s- yeah,” he shook his head in disbelief. Steve fucking Harrington.

Far too soon, his watch buzzed, reminding him of his next appointment in thirty minutes. How had they’d been talking for half an hour already?

“Oh, well, I- um,” Eddie stuttered. He had never felt like this around any other clients, any other person really. “Can you, uh, show me where this is going?” He tried to smile normally.

“Yeah!” Steve grinned and stood, reaching for his belt.

Eddie jumped up too, the iPad on his lap dropping to the floor. Kneeling down to reach it, Eddie found himself looking up and making eye contact with Steve as he unzipped his jeans. “Wait, uh! Jeez man, I can like, step out, or-“

But Steve shrugged with a small laugh, toeing his shoes off so he could slide his pants down his long legs. “You’re going to see it all anyways, right? I’m not shy. Most of the tristate area has seen me in a Speedo, dude.”

Eddie winced, just now remembering why he wanted an underwater tattoo, his stories from his time as the captain of his college swimming team. Don’t picture it right now, freak.

He forced himself to stand while averting his eyes, somehow kneeling at this Greek god’s feet as he took his pants off hadn't already melted his brain but it was close.

The picture Steve had sent of his scars was just skin, and Eddie hadn’t known where it was. Should probably have asked, in hindsight. As Steve pulled the bottom of his tight boxer briefs up to show the back of his thigh, Eddie was glad Steve was turned away from him as his eyes trailed down the muscular thighs to the incredible calves. Somehow even his socked feet were attractive.

“Uh huh. Okay, um. How about you sit on the bed- on the couch! I have to- I’m gunna, you know, grab something.”

He ran out of his office and almost knocked over Gareth at the printer.

“Woah dude, are you okay?”

Eddie nodded as he scrubbed his hands over his face. “If I pass out, don’t let Steve do CPR, okay?”

There was a snickering laugh from behind him and he groaned.

“You don’t do CPR if the person is still breathing, buddy,” Steve supplied helpfully from his office doorway, still in just his boxers. Eddie wanted to dissolve into the floor.

Gareth handed him a bottle of water with a smirk and Eddie snatched a roll of tracing paper from beside the printer. “Thanks so much, Gare,” he grumbled.

“Don’t mention it.”

Steve thankfully didn’t bring up his awkwardness as he traced the back of his thigh on the paper, trying to get the overall shape and size they’d be going for.

“Oh, would it be possible to do like, something up higher?”

Eddie swallowed. “Up… higher?”

Steve did look back this time, making Eddie quickly try to settle his eyes somewhere innocent as Steve pulled the leg of his boxer briefs even higher, onto the perfectly pert cheek where there was another line of scarring.

“To cover this?”

“Sure.” He looked up into Steve’s big round eyes and got lost for a second. He would’ve agreed to anything in that moment, truthfully. Eddie would’ve tattooed his entire body if given the chance. “Um, hold it up there for another minute?” He directed as he grabbed the roll of tracing paper and tore off a longer strip.

Somehow he sunk into some professionalism he didn’t know he possessed as he used the sharpie to outline this very attractive man’s very expansive ass cheek and thigh.

He did leave the room afterwards to go back to the bathroom, throwing his long hair up into a messy knot to get it off his sweaty neck and splashed water on his face.

Exchanging pleasantries and telling Steve (with his pants on) that he’d send over some examples in the next week or so, he got through his hour unscathed.

At the bar with the boys that night, Gareth dramatically recreated his embarrassing moment outside his office. Eddie took the ribbing, downing his drink with a cringe as Drew shoved his shoulder.

“Just think, soon you’ll be tattooing the hottie’s ass for hours,” he laughed.

For some reason (a very good reason), he hadn’t allowed that part to solidify in his mind, and suddenly he had the image of Steve sprawled out under him as he tried to keep his hand steady to not fuck up his tattoo because he was staring at his ass.

“I’m fucked,” he groaned, burying his face in his hands and trying to ignore the ruckus the others made at his misfortune.

Eddie had never been this nervous or had such detailed discussions with a client about their tattoo before. Steve seemed genuinely interested in any and all lore associated with the tattoo and his work in general, shockingly even asking about some that were way back in Eddie’s instagram.

Before he knew it, Steve was sitting in the lobby again and Eddie tried to ignore everyone as he finished up a Roman Numeral date and sent his client to go look in the mirror.

Then it was Steve’s turn and his big eyes were staring into his.

His stencil was all prepared; Eddie had kept it safe in a special spot in his work station and had found himself staring at it between appointments.

“Hey Eds, ready to rock and roll?”

Eddie couldn’t help the wide grin that split his face as Steve approached him, Argyle helpfully sending him back to his station.

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” he mumbled, turning to start gathering his supplies.

In one of their (many) conversations in the time since the consultation, Eddie had advised Steve to come to this appointment in loose fitting shorts so they could just roll or pin up what they needed to get out of the way.

The short basketball shorts were not exactly what he had expected, but Eddie tore his eyes away from the way they hugged his ass and went to grab the stencil from its Important Spot.

His heart beating out of his chest while he meticulously shaved Steve’s butt cheek and thigh should’ve clued him in to how much this appointment was going to test him.

The voice of reason in his head (which annoyingly sounded like Uncle Wayne) was adamant that he be professional. Keep your head down and get to work.

That was easier said than done, however.

At first, Steve joked around with him, sprawled across his padded table with his arms pillowed under his chin. They both kept waiting for the next crazy song Argyle would put on, as he tended to jump from unheard of indie to hippie chique to instrumental video game soundtracks.

He’d explained this would most likely hurt worse than his previous tattoos, tattooing over scar tissue was a bitch. Steve had waved him off.

“Fuuuuck,” Steve whined the first time he traced the needle over the scarring on his upper thigh.

“Not too late to back out,” Eddie chuckled, knowing it would have the opposite effect.

“No way man,” he’d huffed before quickly rearranging himself on the table, gripping the corner harshly. “Keep going.”

Steve was definitely not the first attractive person he’d had on his tattoo bench, but for some reason all of his little noises and gasps and curses were sinking directly into his soul.

“Ready for a break?” Eddie asked when he’d almost finished with the outline. He hoped Steve would let them both take a breather. He desperately needed a cigarette and maybe a quick wank in the bathroom.

“I’m good. I think it’s- ah- it’s definitely getting easier,” Steve lied.

“The shading and color is going to be worse,” Eddie warned. “And we haven’t really, um, migrated north.”

Steve hissed, digging his fists into his eyes adorably. “Oh shit, you’re right. That’s going to suck, isn’t it?”

Eddie nodded solemnly, forgetting Steve wouldn’t be able to see. “Sure is, Stevie.” Not sure where the nickname had come from, he quickly forged ahead. “You don’t need to, I mean, how many people are really seeing it?”

Steve laughed sharply, Eddie pulling the tattoo gun away quickly. “Sorry. You don’t think I’m getting any, huh?”

Eddie felt his cheeks redden. “Th-that’s not what I meant! I’m sure you’re, like, you know, getting lots!”

Steve laughed harder and louder, a bit hysterically. “Oh, now you think I’m a slut?”

Eddie looked around for help but everyone was pointedly not looking at them.

“Oh my god, your face, Eds,” Steve gasped out, up on his elbow now to laugh at him. “I’m messing with you.” He continued laughing, but slowing down now. “Ahh, you are right though. A lot less people are seeing the goods lately. I’m not parading around in speedos anymore, at least.”

Eddie’s brain helpfully shut down at that thought so he didn’t keep putting his foot in his mouth.

“Are we at the break time?” Steve asked when he realized they were both just staring at each other.

“Yeah? Yeah! We can- whatever you want! Let me just-uh,“ he made himself stop making a fool of himself as he wiped a paper towel across the ink.

Eddie helpfully pointed Steve to the restroom first and he slunk to his office.

Jeff poked his head in, a wide grin on his face. “Having fun, Tedster?”

“Shuddup,” he grumbled, aggressively opening drawers in his desk, shoving things around.

“Did you leave your dignity in your desk somewhere?” Jeff teased.

Eddie groaned, then held up a battered pack of cigarettes triumphantly.

“Jeez, that bad, huh? You haven’t had nicotine since-“

Eddie held up a hand. “Nuh uh. Give me this, please, just, lay off. I’m-“

“A mess. I’ve never seen you like this with a client, man. All stammery and heart eyes. ‘Whatever you want, Stevie.’ What was that?”

Eddie shushed him loudly. The place was not huge. “Alright, alright. I don’t know what’s happening, okay? But I gotta get through it so if I can just self medicate in peace, please?”

The first pull of smoke into his lungs was amazing, leaning against the front wall of the shop, sunshine beating down on him. He felt like maybe he could survive this.

Until Steve was again laid out on his table, a cocky little smile on his face. Eddie tried to ignore it and the insane urge to ask him if he’d heard what Jeff had been saying, instead meticulously setting up his tray with ink pots and everything he needed.

“Ready, hot shot?” Came out of his mouth, snarky.

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” Steve sassed back, making Eddie laugh and breaking this bubble of uncertainty.

Steve had come back from their break without complaint, so it appeared he hadn’t had an issue with anything he heard or anything Eddie had done.

“Oh my god,” Steve gasped as the first swipe of color went on. “You weren’t kidding.”

It was then that Eddie realized he hadn’t done anything to settle his other problem. When he went back to the tray for more ink, he tried to surreptitiously readjust his pants and twisted away from Steve’s line of sight.

Steve’s noises were almost constant high needy noises now. In addition, Eddie was forced to settle his hand basically on Steve’s ass to complete the waves and bubbles above the mermaid. He decided to just keep going, no reason to switch spots to have to go back. Eventually he’d be tattooing and having to run his hand over and over the pert cheek. Don’t think about that.

“C-can we stop?” Steve panted.

Eddie froze.

“Sure. You okay?” He instantly searched his face. Had he been so in the zone that he hadn’t realized Steve was really struggling? Could he have been that deep in his own head that he hadn’t checked in with his client? “I’m so sorry- we-“

Steve sucked in several deep breaths, repositioning now that Eddie had stopped tattooing. Shifting onto his side to face him. “I’m okay. Just- a lot, uh, happening.”

Eddie quickly stood to grab Steve a bottle of water, pulling off his black rubber gloves on his way.

“No worries, we can chill, take a break, cut it short. Whatever we need to do,” Eddie rattled off quickly as he passed him the bottle.

Steve gulped half of the water then shook his head. “I think I just need a minute. Got kinda intense, I dunno.” He shook his head, hunching up his shoulders, looking small and overwhelmed in a way that made Eddie want to reach out for him. Keep him safe.

“Hey. No big. I warned you this would be a lot. I’m really sorry for not checking in.” He dropped down onto his stool, and he watched as Steve sort of curled into himself more. But there wasn’t much he could hide in his little shorts. “Oh. Um. That’s normal, too. Bodies are weird.” He tried to keep his voice neutral, but he could feel his cheeks warm.

Steve groaned and covered his face. “Oh my god,” he breathed.

They sat in silence for a long moment. Then Eddie had an idea.

“Stay here. I’ll be right back.”

Steve seemed even more anxious when he returned to his station, almost shaking as he bit into a cuticle and ran his other hand through his hair.

“You’re okay. Do you trust me?” The heavy question hung in the air between them. “I mean-“

“Yes.”

Eddie’s heart stopped then ratcheted even faster against his ribs. He grinned down at this gorgeous man on his table.

“Put these on. They should fit.”

His black sweatpants were a bit short on Steve, his ass and thighs taking up more room than his own. But it would work, and they hid more than his thin shorts.

Now that he was decent, Eddie gestured for Steve to follow him.

“Argyle, we’re taking a break. Gunna go see Chris.”

“You got it. Tell her I said hey,” Argyle called from his corner, not raising his eyes from the guy he was piercing.

Outside, Eddie watched Steve become more and more relaxed as they walked to the end of the block.

“Chris?” He finally asked, cocking his head adorably. Like a puppy.

Eddie grinned. “You’ll see.”

Inside the brightly colored ice cream shop, Steve almost ran excitedly to the front counter just as Chrissy came from the back, wiping her hands on her apron.

“Cunningham? You’re Chris?”

“Oh my god!” She shrieked. “Harrington? What are you doing here?”

Eddie looked between them, shocked. Chrissy had come around the counter to launch herself into Steve’s arms, hugging him tight and squealing as he spun her around.

This wasn’t how Eddie had expected this to go. “Uhh?”

Chrissy thankfully caught his deer in headlights expression and let go, laughing. “Eddie! Where’d you dig this one up from?”

“He found me! Sorta. Argyle found him,” he snorted. “I’m doing a piece for him.”

Chrissy beamed at him, nodding. “Ahh, that explains it. C’mon you two, sit down. What can I tempt you with, Steve?”

While Steve downed a milkshake and Eddie massacred a banana split, Eddie learned that Steve and Chrissy had gone to school together back in Indiana. Somehow both of them had bounced around before ending up in California. Steve explained he’d always wanted to live near the ocean.

Chrissy asked about the tattoo he was getting, and Eddie watched enraptured as Steve took the question, excitedly detailing the dark mermaid.

“It’s to cover up some scarring on my leg,” he explained.

“Ohhh yeah, from your-“

Steve suddenly leaned over the table to cover Chrissy’s mouth. Eddie burst out laughing, unsure what was happening, but watched Chrissy and Steve have a silent conversation through raised eyebrows.

“Ewww!” Steve pulled his hand back and wiped it on his (Eddie’s) pant leg. “She licked me!”

“Not surprised. Chris is a hardass.” He shot her a wide grin as she glared at him and flipped him off. “She plays dirty.”

“Eddie doesn’t know about your accident?”

“Chrissy, I’m begging you,” Steve wailed dramatically.

Smirking, she took a small sip from her own milkshake, eying the both of them.

“I have no idea what’s going on,” Eddie chuckled. “But we need to get going if we’re trying to wrap up the rest of your tattoo today.”

Steve agreed and they both hugged Chrissy, Steve grabbing her number to make plans for lunch another day.

Shaking his head to himself, Eddie chuckled as they walked back down the road, “That was unexpected.”

“You aren’t kidding. What a small world, huh?”

“Maybe it’s a sign. Just so you know, her and Argyle have been in like an on again, off again thing for a while. But-“

Steve shuddered. “Nah man, she’s like my little sister. That’s not a problem.”

Eddie held the tattoo shop door open for Steve who smirked at him.

Feeling bad that he hadn’t thought of it before, he sent Steve to his station and went to grab the black canvas partition to put in front of them, separating them from the rest of the shop. Hopefully it helped Steve relax and not feel as anxious.

“Better?” Eddie asked.

Steve nodded a few times, then slid out of his (Eddie’s) sweatpants. Eddie turned his back to get his stuff organized again while Steve got himself situated on the table.

“C-can you… uh, pull your shorts up?” Eddie winced at his stuttering question. Again he was struck with the realization that he was never this unprofessional and simpering with any other client.

But Steve reached a hand back to uncover his leg and butt to him, pretty much tucking the extra fabric between his cheeks. Eddie swallowed.

“Thanks.”

“Anytime,” Steve sassed in response.

Eddie snorted. At least he was feeling better.

He got back in the zone, shading and coloring in but making sure he kept checking in this time.

“Good?” He huffed as he wiped the paper towel across the scarred area on his butt.

“So good,” Steve groaned and Eddie barked a laugh.

“Need a break?”

“No, just get the worst bits over with, will you?”

Eddie chuckled and went over the scar again with the tattoo gun, seeing Steve clench his fist in his periphery.

He tried his best to quickly go over the scarred skin, to limit the amount of pain he was putting Steve through.

Until he gasped and Eddie pulled back, instantly stopping and tracking across his face.

“Sorry. I’m okay. I dunno. Maybe more nerve endings there or something,” he rambled, wide eyed and looking pale.

“Almost done, I promise. You need your water?”

Steve nodded shakily and Eddie handed the now surely lukewarm bottle over, watching as Steve downed it, his Adam’s apple bobbing attractively.

Eddie stood to go grab a cold water for both of them and impulsively picked up some wrapped cookies they kept around for everyone. Definitely not to bide his time while Steve got himself together, and definitely not because it was crumbling Eddie’s already dwindling self control. Absolutely not. He was a goddamn professional.

Steve was propped on his side again, but he didn’t look as nervous or shaken as last time.

“Oooh, a milkshake and then a cookie? You know something about my sweet tooth, Eds?”

The nickname caught him off guard, as did the shit eating grin and the new twinkle in his eye.

Eddie giggled, coughed, then managed a lower laugh. “Ah, I can’t say that I do, but it helps to keep your sugar up. Or just something to keep your mind off the pain.”

Steve groaned goodnaturedly, getting himself back into position on the table, propping himself on an elbow to munch on the cookie.

Eddie focused on shading around and over the scars first, making sympathetic noises at Steve’s whines and gasps. This may be the most trying session of his career. Could he put ‘good under pressure, ex: attractive client whimpering’ on his resume?

He powered through the rest of the shading, making sure he kept an eye on Steve but trying his best to tune out his (sexy) noises and didn’t really pay any attention to what was coming out of his mouth.

“Fucking hell, Eddie,” Steve panted as he tried to gently wipe off all the mess and clean him up. He clenched his jaw to keep himself from commenting or moaning along with him.

Eddie insisted he wear his sweatpants home.

After everyone had cleaned up from their last client, Eddie suddenly looked up and had everyone’s eyes on him.

“Uhh?”

“Dude. What was that?” Drew was closest.

Gareth chimed in with a smirk, “That was Steve,” dragging his name out like they were in middle school.

Eddie groaned. He could feel his cheeks heating up and he did not want to be ridiculed any further.

“Oh, Bredward, it was disgusting.” Jeff came over and threw himself dramatically across Eddie’s chair. “You two were over here giggling at each other like kindergarteners. And I’ve never heard you gushing over a client like that.”

Eddie opened his mouth to argue but the rest of the guys decided to pipe up to give examples.

“Doing such a good job, almost done, I promise.”

“A bit more. You can do it. C’mon.”

“I’ve got you, Stevie.”

“That’s it, deep breaths for me.”

“I didn’t!”

“You did!” Gareth nodded and Eddie grimaced.

“He took him on a date down to Chrissy’s halfway through!” Argyle supplied.

The rest of the guys stopped and turned to Eddie, who just made a face and nodded shortly in silent confirmation of this ridiculousness. There was an uproar of gasps and groans, making Eddie drop down onto his stool, groaning himself and throwing his head back to stare at the ceiling while they continued.

Jeff seemed to sober first. “What the fuck, man?”

“I don’t know. I- um, got a little carried away. I guess.”

“You guess,” Gareth huffed. “I felt like I was listening to a 900 number next to me. You know these cubicle walls aren’t soundproof, right? I had to tell my client you guys were dating because she was concerned.”

“What?”

“Bro, he was over here sounding like a pornstar and you were just as bad. I couldn’t tell her the truth!”

Eddie covered his face finally. He knew it had been too much, but hearing it from his friends made it all seem worse. Had Steve been uncomfortable with him? He hadn’t said anything. Eddie probably royally fucked this up for himself.

“Shit.”

@steddiesummerexchange