#aka my latest obsession

[ladydrarry]

“What happened? Who’s hurt?”

“No one! Isn’t that a nice change?” Harry asks.

Ron hums. “I think this counts as you being hurt, Harry.”

“I’m not bleeding, no it doesn’t,” he says. McGonagall’s eyes narrow. “That’s not the point. About the door in the ministry that you’re having Order members guard?”

“Mr. Potter!” she begins, glaring. “How do you even-”

“Voldemort sent Nagini to kill whoever was guarding it so she could get past, but don’t worry, I helped stop it and now we’re all friends.” He pauses. “Except Voldemort, we’re not friends with him. Obviously.”

Ron snorts. McGonagall seems lost for words, which is always fun for him, personally.

There’s a pop, and Dobby is next to them. “Dumbledore is wanting to be seeing you, and Mister Harry Potter,” he says, and then he blinks, seeing them and lighting up. “Mister Harry! And Mister Ron. Your father is being here,” he says.

Oh, well that’s convenient. “Can you go get the other Weasleys?” he asks Dobby.

“Don’t do that,” McGonagall says. “We don’t need to cause a ruckus.”

Dobby’s ears droop, and Harry’s about to tell him it’s fine when he stands tall and says to McGonagall, “Dobby is a free elf,” and disappears with a pop.

“Are you trying to make me go gray?” McGonagall asks, but now she has on the face she makes when she’s trying not to laugh, so he doesn’t feel too bad.

“The twins are,” Ron tells her, “we just do it on accident.”

“I can’t imagine what you would think up if you were trying to do it on purpose,” she mutters. “Alright, everyone to the headmaster’s office. I’m sure your sister and brothers will be along shortly.” She looks at Harry. “Can you walk, Mr. Potter?”

“Sure,” he says, “absolutely, I’ve been walking for years.”

survival is a talent by @shanastoryteller

[orcelito]

i didnt watch any trigun 98 today bc i decided i wanted to watch more tokyo mew mew. ive been slooooooooooooooooooooooooowly making my way thru on my rewatch. bit by bit. when i feel like. im at ep 18 rn. i just wanted smth i felt like i could look away from while i trimmed my nails lol

also i was supposd to get my new phone today but Turns Out it's gonna b tomorrow. which is Fine i guess. it means i wont have to go to work tomorrow without a phone case. but i want it................NOW.....

[latenightreadingpdf]

Hidden in Plain Sight - Dave Lizewski

₊‧⁺˖⋆ Masterlist ⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ Part 2 ⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ Part 3 ⋆˖⁺‧₊

Summary: When Y/S/N saves Kick-Ass from a dangerous situation, he becomes obsessed with trying to uncover her true identity. Little does he know, Y/S/N is a girl from his school who secretly has a crush on him as well. As they patrol together, their worlds collide in ways neither expected, leading to a surprising revelation about who's really behind the mask.

Y/S/N - Your superhero name

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

The night sky over New York had a strange way of making a person feel invincible. Dave Lizewski, aka Kick-Ass, was just starting out his amateur superhero career and was already way in over his head. Sure, he'd gotten a few decent hits in on some petty thugs before, but most of the time, he spent more energy trying not to die than actually fighting crime.

Tonight was one of those nights.

He sprinted down an alley, panting, adrenaline surging through his veins. Behind him, two guys—huge, brawny types who clearly had nothing better to do than terrorize the innocent—chased him with knives. His green suit felt like a second skin, clinging to him with every move, though it wasn’t exactly made for high-intensity situations like this. His lungs burned, and a stitch formed in his side. Not good.

“I swear,” he gasped to himself, “I’m gonna die.”

The alley came to an abrupt dead end. He cursed, turning just in time to see the guys closing in, grinning like they'd won the lottery. He raised his fists, trying to look braver than he felt.

"This... is not going to end well," Dave muttered.

Before either of them could lunge, something fast and powerful blurred from the shadows, hitting one of the thugs with such force that he flew backward, crashing into a stack of crates. The second guy barely had time to react before the figure was on him too, taking him down with an expert kick to the stomach.

Dave blinked in disbelief. The figure straightened, revealing a young woman in a sleek, black suit. It wasn’t flashy, but it looked way more professional than his own green and yellow DIY get-up. She had an aura of confidence and strength that radiated even in the dim light.

And, yeah, Dave noticed, she had a killer figure.

"You... you just saved my life!" Dave stammered.

The girl rolled her eyes behind her mask. “Yeah, and I’m guessing it won’t be the last time, Kick-Ass.”

Kick-Ass. She knew his name.

“Wait, who are you?” he asked, his voice still shaky from the adrenaline.

“Call me Y/S/N,” she said casually, as if saving people from imminent death was just another Friday night. “You really should be more prepared for situations like this.”

“I... I thought I was.”

Y/S/N snorted, crossing her arms. "Really? No backup, no weapons? Just... that?" She gestured to his suit. "You're gonna get yourself killed."

Dave flushed, partly from embarrassment and partly from the rush of adrenaline still coursing through him. “I’ll... I’ll do better,” he promised lamely, watching as she walked away, her silhouette disappearing into the night.

And just like that, she was gone.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

At Atomic Comics the next day, Dave was still riding the adrenaline high from his encounter with the mysterious heroine. His friends, Todd and Marty, sat across from him, distracted by the latest issue of X-Men, while Dave rambled on about her.

“I swear, you guys, she was like something out of The Avengers. She totally saved my ass last night. And she was hot. I mean, like, really hot. Her suit—it was super tight. I could barely focus.”

Todd raised an eyebrow, putting his comic down. “Dude, you’re such a nerd. A hot superhero saves you, and that’s what you focus on?”

Dave shrugged, grinning sheepishly. “I mean, yeah? You didn’t see her. She’s got this whole thing going on—great moves, great...uh...form. Her ass is—”

"Wow. Really going full perv, aren't we?" Marty quipped, rolling his eyes.

Unbeknownst to Dave, someone had been listening. On the other side of a nearby shelf, Y/N, the kind and somewhat popular girl from school, had been browsing comics too. She knew who Dave was—after all, they had a few classes together—but they had never really talked.

Y/N smiled to herself as she overheard Dave’s rant about his superhero crush. Little did he know that she was Y/S/N, the very girl who had saved his life last night. Hearing him talk about her alter-ego like that—saying she was cool, hot, and all that—was...well, flattering in a weird way. And the fact that he was so obviously into her made things a lot more interesting.

Still smiling, Y/N grabbed a random comic, paid for it, and headed out, a plan forming in her head.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

Later that week, Dave suited up as Kick-Ass once again, hoping to catch a glimpse of Y/S/N during his patrol. After their first encounter, he couldn’t stop thinking about her. She had this presence that he couldn’t shake off, and it didn’t help that his crush was amplified by the fact that she’d saved him. She was the real deal—a hero, like he wanted to be.

“Kick-Ass.”

Dave turned at the sound of her voice, heart skipping a beat. She was there, perched casually on a rooftop ledge, looking down at him with that same cool confidence.

“Y/S/N!” He tried to sound smooth, but his voice cracked just a little.

“You’re not going to need saving again, are you?” she teased, dropping down to the street in front of him.

“I’ve got it covered this time,” he said, puffing out his chest just a little. “Totally prepared.”

Y/S/N gave him a once-over, amusement flickering in her eyes. “Sure you are.”

The two of them walked together, patrolling the empty streets, though it was a quiet night—too quiet, really.

“So, Kick-Ass,” Y/S/N started, her voice casual. “There’s this guy I go to school with. He’s in a few of my classes.”

Dave’s heart gave a little lurch. Was she... opening up to him? Maybe this was his chance to learn more about her.

“Yeah? What about him?” he asked, trying to keep his voice steady.

“He’s super nerdy, kind of awkward. But he’s... well, he’s hot. Like, really hot.”

Dave blinked. “Wait, what?”

“I bet he’s got... you know, a lot going on,” she continued, her voice dropping slightly. “In more ways than one.”

Dave felt his face flush. “Oh.”

“I can’t focus in class because I’m too busy thinking about him,” she added. “It’s a problem, I don’t know what to do.”

“Wow, okay. Um... who’s the guy?” he asked, not really wanting to know but needing to at the same time.

“Dave Lizewski,” Y/S/N said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Dave stopped dead in his tracks. His brain short-circuited for a second. “Wait... what? Did you just... did you just say Dave Lizewski?”

She turned to face him, her expression unreadable behind her mask. “Yeah, why? You know him?”

“I—uh—” Dave’s thoughts tumbled over each other in a chaotic mess. She knows me. She actually knows me. And she thinks I’m hot?!

Y/S/N didn’t give him any time to process. “Anyway, I gotta run. Crime won’t stop itself.” She gave him a little wave before disappearing into the night once more, leaving Dave standing there, still in shock.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

That night, Dave immediately FaceTimed Todd and Marty, pacing his room in a frenzy.

“Guys! You are not going to believe what just happened!” he blurted out as soon as they answered.

“What is it now, man?” Marty asked, exasperated.

“I think Y/S/N goes to our school.”

Both of them stared at him blankly through the screen.

“No, seriously! She was talking about a guy she likes in her classes. And then she said my name! My actual name!”

Todd snorted. “Okay, but how do you know she’s not just messing with you?”

“I... don’t know. But it seemed real,” Dave insisted. “I think she really goes to school with me. And now I have to figure out who she is.”

He grabbed his old yearbook off the shelf and flipped it open. “There’s gotta be some kind of clue.”

Todd and Marty exchanged skeptical glances but eventually joined in, helping him comb through the yearbook. They scanned faces, trying to match anyone they knew with the mystery of Y/S/N.

“Alright, so we need a plan,” Dave said, leaning over the pages. “Monday, we’re going to do some recon. Check out anyone who might be her. We’ll figure this out.”

Todd and Marty, albeit reluctantly, nodded in agreement.

“Sure, dude. Recon mission on Monday.”

Dave closed the yearbook with a snap, his mind racing. Somewhere in the sea of students, Y/S/N was hiding in plain sight. And now, he was more determined than ever to find out who she was—both in and out of her suit.

Little did he know, Monday would bring him more answers than he could’ve ever expected.

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

A/N ~ there’s not enough Kick-Ass fanfics on here and I’m sick of it :( lmk if you want a part 2

[dominantslasherking]

The Butcher aka Cooper With Dominant Male S/o

Authors note: This Dilf is so fine...from the new movie "Trap".

Backstory: Seems like the serial killer the butcher is a big fan of you, a famous horror and thriller writer, who just so happens to be at the concert he was attending...He can't take his eyes off of you.

My Stories are meant for the much more mature audience, 18+

The thumping beat of the concert reverberated through the venue as Cooper Adams walked alongside his daughter, Riley, navigating through the crowds and masses of overly loud fans. The flashing lights and excited murmurs of the fans around them only made his steps quicken as he held his daughters hand giving Riley a small smile as he rushed through. He wasn’t particularly interested in the music, but this concert meant the world to Riley.

Still, something more exhilarating had caught his attention tonight—something far more important than the performer they had come to see, Riley had some fun, it was his turn, finally something that was worth while.

As they neared the merchandise stands, Cooper’s heart skipped a beat when he spotted the familiar logo of his favorite author—your logo.

A large banner of your name, [Your Name], hung proudly over a stand dedicated entirely to limited-edition merch from your latest horror novels. A wave of excitement surged through him. You were his obsession, his secret desire. Not only were you a celebrated horror and thriller writer, but you embodied everything that twisted his mind into dangerous knots.

Every dark corner of his soul came alive when he thought of you, admired you, studied you, his smile suddenly widened, Riley just akwardly looked at her father, giving a tilt to her head as she observed her father, not thinking much of it.

Cooper's stomach tightened with frustration when he noticed that the signing event had already ended. A young woman at the front of the stand, practically bouncing on her feet, was showing off her signed copy of your latest release to anyone who would listen. "I can’t believe I got his autograph! He’s even more handsome in person," she squealed, the fan was dripped in head to toe of yor merch, as she just gushed, showed off, what she had got.

Cooper’s fingers twitched, clenching into fists in his jacket pockets. His jaw set tight as jealousy simmered under his skin. That woman had your attention—even for a fleeting moment. He hated the idea of anyone having a piece of you that wasn’t his.

With a nonchalant glance toward his daughter; who was now scrolling mindlessly on her phone, Cooper let his foot slide out just enough for the gushing fan to trip.

The fan-girl stumbled, her body crashing into the merch stand. She hit the edge with a sickening thud, her head knocking against the hard surface, and a thin stream of blood began to trickle down her forehead.

People gasped and rushed to her aid some yelling out for help while others urgent to fingure out what happened. but Cooper’s expression remained impassive. He leaned down toward Riley, his voice soft and controlled. "We should go," he said calmly his hand suddenly snatching a keychain of one of the killers in one of your most famous novels. "The singer’s about to start."

Riley nodded, oblivious to the chaos Cooper her father had just caused. They left the scene behind, and Cooper took a steadying breath. Hurting the girl had been easy—too easy—but the satisfaction of it didn’t last long.

His thoughts were already spiraling back to you. He couldn’t stop wondering where you might be right now. Were you still here at the concert? Were you watching the performance like any other fan? Would you even notice him? The chances of that were unlikely, you probably left already. "You okay dad?" Riley piped up finally looking up from her phone, "Yeah kiddo, just your dad being a fan..." Cooper said giving his daughter a fake smile,she just nodded. "Yeah, I'm so excited to hear 'The Crow' singing, obviously he's not as good as Lady Raven but, he's my second fav." Riley had gushed with a big smile on her face. --- --- Meanwhile, seated in the far rows of the concert hall, you leaned back in your chair, trying to stay out of sight. A few fans had already recognized you and asked for autographs, but now your focus was on the performance. The lights on stage dimmed, and the crowd roared in excitement as The Crow was about to appear. You had come here as a brief escape from your writing, but a part of you enjoyed watching the excitement build, the way the energy of a crowd swelled in anticipation.

As the first chords of the music played, you felt the eyes of onlookers on you. Some discreet, others more obvious, but nothing that grabbed your attention for long—

Cooper Adams, accompanied by his daughter, found his seat a few rows away from you. But something in the way he carried himself caught your attention. You had no idea that this unassuming suburban dad, who appeared so attentive to his daughter, was secretly one of your biggest fans and a very famous murderer. Or that beneath that calm, composed exterior, Cooper’s mind was swirling with fantasies—dangerous, obsessive fantasies.

As his gaze swept the crowd, his eyes landed on you, and for a moment, the world seemed to narrow down to just the two of you. The flashing lights, the noise of the concert, even his daughter—it all faded as Cooper’s breath caught in his throat. You were still here. He hadn’t missed his chance after all.

His chest tightened, his heart pounding as thoughts of submission briefly flickered in his mind. Cooper clenched his jaw, pushing those thoughts away. No, he thought, mentally berating himself. He wasn’t weak. He wasn’t some needy fool, desperate for your attention—except he was ready to kneel down open his mouth and!!---. His hands trembled as he tried to keep his composure, but every part of him ached to be noticed by you. He wanted you to see him, to acknowledge him, maybe even more than that.

'Control yourself', Cooper, he chastised in his mind. 'You’re not the kind of man to submit. You're the one in charge, the one who dominates.' Yet no matter how much he tried to convince himself, the thoughts of giving in to you—of letting you have power over him—kept creeping in, no matter how much he hated it. He stood next to his daughter, Riley, who was singing, jumping, dancing along to the music, lost in the excitement of the moment.

But Cooper’s mind wasn’t on the singer or the performance. It was on you—the man sitting just a few rows away, your sharp, smoky eyes fixed on the stage, oblivious to the man obsessing over you, a few feet from you. Cooper couldn’t help but stare. His heart hammered in his chest, and a thrill coursed through his veins as he took you in. The famous horror and thriller writer, [Your Name], in the flesh—right there. Every twisted story you’d ever written had fueled his darkest desires fuck he even jerked off to a few, and now you were close enough that he could almost reach out and touch you. He drank in every detail of you: the way you sat, the confident set of your jaw, the subtle intensity in your expression as you watched the concert.

And then, it happened. Your eyes shifted, tilting just slightly in his direction, as though you could feel his gaze drilling into you. Cooper’s breath hitched in his throat when your sharp eyes locked with his. For a brief moment, the world seemed to freeze around him. You were staring right back at him.

His pulse quickened, a hot surge of excitement coursing through him as a tightening sensation began to build in his pants. There was something primal, predatory, about the way your gaze lingered on him, as if you were sizing him up. It sent a shiver down his spine, a thrill he hadn’t felt in ages (Course he would feel some type of feeling with his kills but none like this). He could barely contain the flood of emotions rushing through him—admiration, obsession, lust.

He shifted his attention briefly to Riley, who was still lost in the performance, her attention fully on the stage. Cooper cleared his throat, forcing his voice to remain casual. “I’ll be back in a minute, sweetheart,” he said, a little too quickly.

Riley waved him off without a second glance, too absorbed in the music to care as she went back to dancing and jumpin.

This was the opening Cooper had been waiting for. He smoothed his jacket, trying to appear composed, but the surge of adrenaline racing through him told a different story. 'This is it,' he thought, 'I’m going to meet him.' Stretching lips into a smile. As Cooper made his way through the crowd, each step felt heavier, the weight of the moment pressing down on him. His mind raced with conflicting thoughts. A part of him felt ridiculous—'What am I doing?'—but the other part, the darker side, was elated. This was his chance. His fantasies about you had been building for years, and now, finally, he was going to be face to face with the man who consumed his every waking thought.

When he finally stood before you, his breath hitched again. Up close, you were even more striking—confident, aloof, as if you were completely aware of the effect you had on others but didn’t care.

You looked at him, amusement flickering across your face, your sharp gaze studying him like you were dissecting a character in one of your novels.

“Big fan, huh?” Your voice was smooth, low, teasing. It sent a jolt through Cooper, making him feel exposed, vulnerable, and that made him hate the feeling. But at the same time, he wanted more of it. He clenched his fists at his sides, trying to suppress the sudden urge to submit—to give in to the pull you had over him.

“I—yeah,” Cooper stammered, feeling heat creep up his neck as he spoke. He cleared his throat, trying to recover. “I’ve been following your work for years.”

You raised an eyebrow, a smirk tugging at the corner of your lips. “Oh? For years?” You leaned back in your seat, eyeing him up and down, your gaze lingering on his well-built frame. Cooper could feel your eyes raking over him, and for a moment, he felt like he was one of your characters—trapped under the scrutiny of a killer, waiting for his fate. He shifted on his feet, the thrill mixing with a tinge of nervousness.

“You don’t strike me as a horror fan,” you continued, your tone teasing, like you were already playing a game Cooper didn’t fully understand yet. “Most dads like you are into, I don’t know, football or action movies.” Your gaze lingered a little too long on his broad chest and strong arms, making it clear you noticed his physique. “But you… you’re different, aren’t you?” The husky voice of your whispered into his ear, as it was really hard to hear over all the fans screaming.

Cooper swallowed hard, his mouth suddenly dry. The way you spoke, the way you looked at him—it was making it difficult for him to think straight. His mind flashed with images of giving in, of submitting to you, of being at your mercy, but he quickly shoved those thoughts away. 'No,' he told himself. 'You’re in control, Cooper.'

But that didn’t stop his pulse from quickening, or the heat spreading through his body as he stood before you, trying to come up with something, anything, to say that wouldn’t make him sound like a complete fool.

“I’ve always appreciated the darker side of things,” Cooper finally managed, his voice steadier now. “Your work—it resonates with me.” He said his body slightly leaning to also whisper into your ear. His eyes flicked down briefly before meeting yours again, the primal intensity in your gaze still making his heart race.

You chuckled softly, leaning in slightly. “Is that so? Well, let’s hope you don’t resonate too much with the killers in my stories.” The teasing edge in your voice was unmistakable, but there was something more behind it—something intrigued. You could tell this wasn’t just another fan. There was something off about Cooper, something familiar, though you couldn’t quite put your finger on it yet.

Cooper felt a surge of both excitement and unease. He was standing in front of the man who had unknowingly shaped his darkest fantasies, and now he was being teased by him. It was everything Cooper had ever wanted, and yet it was terrifying. His thoughts began to spiral again—submissive urges flickering at the edges of his mind—but he quickly shoved them aside. He wasn’t weak. He wasn’t here to submit.

But the way you looked at him… God, it made him question everything. fuck, he's getting hard again.

[runninriot]

When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let's spread the self-love 💛

ohh thank you Hype!! 🖤

in celebration of the 290k words i've published in 2024, i'm gonna choose 5 of last year's fics

Heat of the Moment, feat. Eddie losing his mind over Steve in very short shorts

Mine, feat. possessive Steve (with a little twist)

Sweet Thing/Safe Space, feat. Sub Eddie & ProDom Steve

Away From The Sun, Into My Arms, feat Vampire Eddie, inspired by this art piece

gotta be Wet Dreams (because this spiralled from a microfic to a oneshot to a three chapter fic and i loved every second of writing it), feat. Virgin Eddie and Slutty Steve my fucking beloved

also, while we're at it - below are some of my favourite fics i've read this year:

Bear Hugs by @steddieas-shegoes

Updraft (and also all of the Kiss that ring Series because i'm obsessed with it) by @just-my-latest-hyperfixation

Through the pines by @steddie-island

A Thousand Flowers Could Bloom by @morningberriesao3

The Graveyard Shift by @stervrucht

I'll Be As Honest As You'll Let Me by @braincell-pingpong

just an only child of the universe. by @thefreakandthehair

Take your time (I wanna cross some lines) by @sidekick-hero

In the Garden, Under Your Hand and Tempest Entire (how to even choose?) by @paradimeshifts7

There Are Galaxies In You by @wormdebut

the carnivorous lamb by @arimakes

A Day After by @griefabyss69

Impressionable Young Minds and Tentative by @eddywoww

Oh, He Wants by @thisapplepielife

Jaeger Moon by @azrielgreen

The Train Fic by @novemberthorne

Turn by @postmodernau

i don’t know, you figure it out aka Trailer Park Steve by @wynnyfryd

and so may more, i couldn't possibly name them all

[sh1-n0bu]

✿ 𝙟𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙮𝙪𝙖𝙣’𝙨 𝙜𝙪𝙞𝙙𝙚 𝙤𝙣 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙩𝙤 𝙢𝙖𝙠𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙛𝙚𝙘𝙩 𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙖𝙠! ✿

characters: jing yuan x nb!reader

warnings: tooth rotting fluff, crack, chaos, jing yuan having an obsession with ur cheeks, this was much more funnier in my head. i suck at writing😔😔

notes: i need to learn how to shift so i can make this mans my husband hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

STEP 1: TENDERIZE THE MEAT

it was no doubt that jing yuan was an incredibly affectionate and clingy lover. and that tragically only amplifies when his lover - aka you - has been away for a few weeks long business trip to another ship of the xianzhou. it only made sense when your fluffy haired lover immediately threw himself into your arms just when you've barely stepped in through the front door, calling out his name.

"yu! i'm ba-" before you could even finish that sentence alone, a large man with fluffy white hair crashes into you, knocking the both of you down onto the floor of your shared home. to say he was heavy would be an understatement. his large body was practically crushing you, almost to the point of crushing your chest cavities in.

"my love!!" a dramatic voice calls out from on top of you before sobbing noises could be heard. burying his face into your chest, the general sobs. shoulders shaking and heaving. but you were too old for his tricks and shenanigans. you've been dealing with jing yuan's shit for a whole of five centuries, after all. this was nothing new.

"where have you been?! why didn't you answer my texts?! or even read my messages?!" the general continues to complain loudly, like a child who's favorite toy had been taken away from him.

well, it was hard to answer him when he was literally crushing you under his weight, snuggling his face into your chest with sobs - he just wanted to feel your chest on his face, that was all - and when you have quite literally been busy with business to start with. not to mention the latest stellaron crisis thing has made signal quite weak too.

however, before you could even let out a sigh at his continued shenanigans, you see him peek up at you with the same old golden eyes. golden eyes looking up at you from where his face was smushed oh so comfortably against your chest. you can just feel the clingy man's lips quirk upwards into a smug grin.

reaching his hands up, the general cups your cheeks in his large and warm hands. calloused from years of battle and hardships yet still gently cradling your face in his hold. he always made sure to be absolutely gentle with you. sometimes.

once his favorite part of you was safely and securely in his hold, your oversized, clingy, cat-like lover wastes no time. poking, squeezing, prodding, turning your face into many different shapes as he giggles to himself as if he was centuries younger again. back when he first met you. back when he was just a simple cloud knight in training, hopelessly pining after you, stuttering and tripping over his words as he tries to make up a sentence to talk to to you.

STEP 2: SEASON THE MEAT

reaching up to a more comfortable pose to give him more better access to your soft cheeks, jing yuan leans over you with his face in his ever so smug look. but to your trained eyes, you could see just how much the man had missed your warmth. your affections. the way your hand would run through his long hair and leave his face peppered in kisses.

"missed you. missed you so much" the general of the luofu mumbles, a cute - adorable almost - lovesick grin on his face as he leans down to pepper your cheeks in kisses. of course, it isn't jing yuan style if he doesn't make any theatrics out of his love and adoration for you.

loud, overdramatic mwah! mwah! mwah! mwah! noises coming from the cat-like man as he leaves not a single spot left without being absolutely smothered in his 'love attacks'.

while of course, you just laid there on the floor, accepting his kisses and dramatic jing yuan style of showing affections. how could anyone ever blame you? jing yuan was a great kisser and he loved to shower you with them. you did missed him as well.

oh, you poor sweet summer child. if only you knew what your mischievous lover was planning...

STEP 3: BON APPETIT!

"yu... lemme mwah get up first mwah, will you? i get it, i mwah missed you as mmf well, my love. but please, let mmgg me eat something first" you hum softly, not exactly making any move or indications that you wanted to get up despite your words.

what can you say? your lover was a great kisser. an absolute A+ kisser. soft, gentle pecks peppering all over your face, taking away your breath everytime he decides to dip just a bit closer and steal a kiss or two - or maybe even three - from your lips. but you really needed a bite to eat. your stomach was literally growling just like how mimi would at times. and that was saying something.

"5 more minutes..." the clingy man hums softly, lips still tightly pressed against the soft fat of your cheeks. you simply let out a hum in response, thinking that he was going to kiss you again before -

chomp!

huh...? wait no what? literally. hold up. seriously, no joke. hold on a fucking moment. a literal fucking second to let [name] catch their thoug-

nom! nom nom nom!

before you could even allow your poor exhausted body and fried brain comprehend just what the fuck was going on, your absolute pain in the cheek of a husband decides to on-nom-nom his way on your cheeks. literally. it felt like he was trying to eat you alive like a steak.

STEP 4: TRY TO SURVIVE YOUR LOVER'S WRATH

"jing yuan, one of the seven arbiter-generals of the xianzhou alliance, one of the six charioteers"

uh-oh. not only was that a full-blown full name call but also with his titles?! rest in pieces, jing yuan. try not to trip over your own feet while your seething lover with a bitemark on their cheek chases you down the entirety of the luofu ship with the infamous flip flop in hand. you will truly be missed.

"uhmm..." how should yanqing even begin with his question as he tries to comprehend what happened to your poor face? more specifically, the bitemark on your cheek which seemed red and still fresh. ouch.

"what happ-"

"a lion bit me"

"mimi?!"

"no. another lion"

just then a very much sulking and pouting general with a fluffy white hair comes into the room. face looking like he was ready to sob at any given second, looking very much like a scolded child. that was all the explanation the young lieutenant needed.

"oh".

[wanderlust-in-my-soul]

Currently Watching - November

aka The Masterlist

Because I love a good little list - in alphabetical order! 😊

Regularly updated during the month, latest update 27.11.2024

A little link to my favorite bl-tropes-collection 💙

gif-requests are open, but you'll need to have some patience🌼

Here you can find all of my gifs.

At the end you can have a look at what we can expect in November with a MDL link and a link for a trailer (if avaible).

This is guaranteed to contain spoilers!

1. Blue Canvas of Youthful Days 🇨🇳 (10/12)

@bengiyo made me watch it. I wanted to wait until I could binge it, but he made me curious and now I am heartbroken and anxious! And in love with it. Well, at least the main story. The side couple didn't grew on me. There is a little bit too much obsession between them and I can't get a right feeling for them. They are a little bit off for me. But the main story? Oh so good! So much melancholy and pain and young, shakespearean love! So much trauma on both sides. I hate Qi Lu's father with all my heart. I hope someone will hurt him. And I hope Qi Lu can get away from him. But this is a chinese production. I don't know what to hope for in the final? A happy ending? Would that be too much too ask? Both of them happy, but separated? Well, that could work for me. A sad ending? Possible. I would be devastated. Thank you Ben for making me start it!

2. Love In The Air: Koi no Yokan 🇯🇵 (4/10)

As expected like the OG I don't like that one that much... The only reason I still watch this one is because of Nagumo Shoma. Guess this will be dropped next week... And instead I just watch Kiss x Kiss x Kiss: Love ii Shower...

3. Miseinen: Mijukuna Oretachi wa Bukiyo ni Shinkochu 🇯🇵 (4/11)

Those two are the bluest boys out there right now. They long for each other, and it is coming to the surface, slowly but steady. And sure Hirukawa, you're not going to fall in love with him. Who do you want to fool? You are already in love! I really like this series so much and I know I am not ready for the heartbreak.

4. The Heart Killers 🇹🇭 (2/12)

This whole scene? Gorgeous! Perfect! Incredible! Hot! Wow! The rest of the show? Meh... I enjoy the StyleFadel dynamic, but the rest of the show? Not so much, for now. Perhaps it will get interesting in the future, right now it is kinda boring.

5. Word of Honor 🇨🇳 (20/36)

Perhaps November will be the month I finally keep watching this series. Who knows.

6. Your Sky 🇹🇭 (2/12)

I am in love with them! Is this a bit cringe? Sure. Is the story flat and kinda predictable? Also yes. Do I get butterflies in my stomach whenever they look at each other? Yes, yes, yes! It is so obvious that Fah already likes Teerak. He is so smitten and happy that they can play couple. I can't wait for the feelings to grow on both sides and for them to become real boyfriends and not just fake ones. I guess there will be some heartbreak, because to fill 12 episodes with fake boyfriends is a bit too much. But oh, this series feels so good! I am enchanted!

Finished in November

Series

Let Free The Curse Of Taekwondo 🇰🇷

This series broke my heart, healed it only to break it again. I am very happy we got this domestic, happy ending. It has such a hopeful touch in it. Not everything is damned, just because you took a wrong path in the past. There is always hope for you to find love, to change the path, to get to a state of happiness you dreamed of as a kid. Trauma and abuse shape our lifes, but it doesn't have to dictate it. Tough topic that hits hard. A really good series with a great story and good acting. A good 9 out of 10 for me.

Every You, Every Me 🇹🇭

I was so in love with the first episodes. The concept of a series consisting of multiple episodes showing soulmates falling in love with each other over and over again was all I ever wanted and dreamed of. And then came the two last episodes and we got robbed of this sweet illusion and everything was just fake and acting. It took the magic away. It took the romance away, especially because I couldn't understand the conflict between Inn and Pun. And the time jumps were wild and confusing. I really wish they just have made two episodes more of them being soulmates in love. For episodes 1-8 I give this one a 10 out of 10, but because of the last episodes I can only give an 8 out of 10.

The Nipple Talk 🇹🇼

Oh man, this was so good. We have a small group of friends, a lesbian who likes changing sex-partners and doesn't believe in relationships, a sex-positive straight woman, who likes to have a relationship, but didn't meet the right person so far and has sex with as much men she wants on the way and our gay man, who believes in love and monogamy and who is now on the search for exactly that after the break up with his long term partner. This series was surprisingly good, very sex positive and everyone's guru MAMA has not just an interesting story in stock, but is our mirror and the voice in the back to not judge other people's lifestyles, just because it is not to your liking. It is a mature queer series, no bl. And in the end people can change, love can happen when you least expect it and you are continuously learning and growing. I am happy Leslie finally saw Jie for the perfect partner he would be. HIV was discussed and became an important part in the last part of the story and I love how Leslie understood that this is not a reason to not date a man, especially when you have planned your whole life together already. It is something you can live and love with. But it was great to see him learning, because this can be difficult in the beginning. This series is really just so good! A clear 10 out of 10 for me.

Kidnap 🇹🇭

Okay. This might sound a little bit harsh, but overall I think this was not the best series. It was boring and misleading. Yes, it did not meet my expectations. I thought about some more action and drama. Yes, Ohm and Leng were cute together. Yes, Leng is a rookie, but he did a good job. Yes, Ohm has incredible pretty puppy-eyes. And yet it was not to my liking. What I liked was the fact, that trauma was not healed with love, but got better with a therapist. What I liked was the relationship between Ming and his brother and later between Q and Mhen. It had enough good parts to keep me watching. But overall it was just a 6 out of 10.

Heartstopper Season 3 🇬🇧

I finally watched it! I looooove the comics and I loved the first season. And then there was season two and three and I couldn't bring myself to watch it, because then it would be over and Charlie and Nick would be back in their world and I must let them go again. But it was worth the heartbreak. Nick is the greenest flag on fictional earth and watching them growing together and taking next steps with each other and standing side by side through rough times, really let me believe in love for a short moment. They are perfect and I love this universe! Totally 10 out of 10.

Jack & Joker: U steal my heart! 🇹🇭

Was this series perfect? Nope. Do I care? Also nope. I just have a very soft spot for YinWar. I can't help it. Yes, the plot was kinda weak in the end. The idea of the ring of power was ridiculous, the resolution was just as ridiculous. But still, do I care? Nope, really not. I just love YinWar. They could remake Dinosaur Love and they would get a 10/10 from me. Perhaps one day I can rate this one with a clear mind, but until then this will be a 10 out of 10 for me, and if it is just because of YinWar's chemistry and onscreen kisses and stares and just every fucking interaction.

Movie

Short Film

Dropped in November

Bad Guy My Boss 🇹🇭 (8/12)

I can't deal with this anymore. I have no clue what is going on anymore. And the relationship between Elyes and Pat is so annoying. I have no wish to continue this show anymore. So I dropped it, finally. And made room for something else...

Looking forward to in November

The Nipple Talk - Trailer (Nov 1st)

Bad to bed (Nov 2nd)

Love in the Air: Koi no Yokan - Trailer (Nov 3rd)

Miseinen: Mijukuna Oretachi wa Bukiyo ni Shinkochu (Nov 5th)

Episode 9. Nineteen, Eighteen / Love for Love's Sake special episode (Nov 9th)

Caged Again - Trailer (Nov 15th)

Your Sky - Trailer (Nov 17th)

The Heart Killers - Trailer (Nov 20th)

Petrichor - Trailer (Nov 27th)

[graysnetwork]

What kind of dads I think the 141 tf would be

༻━━━━༺❀༻━━━━༺

𝒥𝑜𝒽𝓃 '𝒮𝑜𝒶𝓅'  𝓜.

❀ Deffo a girl dad

❀ He has three girls with you and always rough housing with them—throwing them in the air and doing anything to make his little girls giggle

❀ ALWAYs giving you heart attacks with the trick he does with them

Once pushed his daughter abruptly into the pool after swimming lessons to see if they payed off (they did)

Then one of your daughters wanted to try a yoga tick and she definitely flipped when she wasn't supposed to.

❀ Always trying to make them happy

Takes them to the daddy daughter dances, takes them on daddy–daughter dates

Buys them anything they want whether it be food to the latest toy

❀ Takes pictures of them all the time!!! What can he say, he likes proof

❀ After a year of taking a break from kids you two try again and finally he gets a boy

He’s so excited

𝒮𝒾𝓂𝑜𝓃 '𝒢𝒽𝑜𝓈𝓉’ 𝓡.

❀ Girl dad all the way!

❀ Obsessed with his little girl and never lets her out of his sight.

❀ Gets teary eyed when she grows every month

❀ He was hesitant to have a kid but you two got the case of baby fever (and horniness) and made one. Now he's in love.

❀ Cherishes her and makes sure she's always happy.

❀ The burly man is suddenly so gentle and always doing peek-a-boo to make her smile

❀ You two wait at least three years to have another kid

Now he’s a girl and boy dad!

❀ Makes sure to treat the two of them so well and make sure they never experience what he did when he was little.

❀ Even with his son hes gently

Sees how Soap plays with his daughters and has a heart attack at the thought of them being in the air

But when his son grows up a bit and starts getting more “tough” (aka punching Simon with his little fists and Simon just thinks it his muscles spasming until he turns around and sees the little guy) he starts playing with him somewhat more rough.

Teaches him Krav Maga

Takes him to the shooting range (only after hes 15)

Also teaches his daughter Krav Maga and gives her enough self protection items to protect herself and the whole school

❀ He tries to not over do it but he's always spending his money on them (and u obvi)

❀ Takes them by base sometimes just to meet their “uncles.”

❀ He just loves them so much

𝒥𝑜𝒽𝓃 𝒫𝓇𝒾𝒸𝑒

❀ Girl dad.

❀ Doesn't have a boy—wouldn't be mad if he had one but he doesn't care, hes ecstatic with his two girls.

❀ Cherishes those precious little girls with his whole heart

❀ Very strict and tells them once they can understand words that they cant date until they turn 30

When they grow up it gets annoying but he's very insistent that they cant date—at least not in high school

❀ He does all the things “normal families do” when he's back home

Disneyland trips, road trips, dinners anywhere the family wants

Speaking of dinners—everyone votes which restaurant sounds the best and that's where you guys go

❀ Almost cries every first day of school

Always posting/sharing photos in family and friend gc’s to show off his daughters achievements

Example:

Price: (Photo of him next to his daughter after getting an award) My daughters amazing

Ghost: 👍

Soap: good kid, congrats

Gaz: let her know we’re proud!

❀ If he posts a picture i believe the caption would go: My little girl is always putting in the work! Best student I know!

He’s always having proud dad moments 🥺

𝒦𝓎𝓁𝑒 "𝒢𝒶𝓏" 𝒢.

❀ Two boys and then one girl

❀ Loves all of them so much!

❀ He’s always teaching them new things

​​He’s a teaching dad

Teaches them how to cook, play sports, bake, swim, ect.

❀ Takes them to sports events and concerts

He’s the kind of guy whos always giving them reasons to post pics

❀ Soaps a cool dad but he's a rowdy cool, Kyle on the other hand is cool chill dad

His kids are never embarrassed by him and their friends also love him

❀ (He’s the dad who the moms like)

❀ Not as strict on his kids but he is very protective

❀ He also teaches his kids self defense

༻━━━━༺❀༻━━━━༺

[rin-solo]

I MEANT TO POST THESE HERE BUT I FORGOT ... Anyway, have some designs for my latest obsession, EPIC the musical. The main art style inspiration was definitely "The Prince of Egypt" because that's the first style I thought of when I considered an animated adaptation of this story.

I might draw more characters eventually but these two are and have always been my favorites.

***

While I took several creative liberties, I kept something that Jorge said about character designs because it's really cool: the fact that glowing elements symbolize gods or their influence. So I gave Odysseus, while he's still Athena's warrior, the bracelets and the belt (yes, he discards them after "My Goodbye" because, let's be real, that was more his goodbye than hers anyway; he wouldn't hold on).

Ginger Odysseus was not planned and neither was him having heterochromia but then I did it once and I could not unsee it anymore (one eye is green, symbolizing wisdom and insight, the other eye is gray, representing strength, firmness, and ruthlessness.) The full body is around Troy Saga, the top headshot is Cyclops Saga, and the bottom headshot is Thunder Saga (yes the fact that that headshot only shows his right side and his gray eye which represents his ruthless side among others is on purpose.)

For Athena, I took more liberties ... The silver/blue wasn't working for me, so I went with gold/purple instead. The mask headshot is important because I actually think this would be how she appears exclusively up until the end of "My Goodbye"; the full body is more Wisdom Saga/Telemachus era Athena (aka soft, emotionally vulnerable Athena.) Lots of glowing elements, lots of bright, imposing colors ... and lots of opportunities for her look to shift toward more human (same with Odysseus who is designed to be able to shift toward more ruthless/rugged.)

***

I might post more sketches and random EPIC related art things soon because my obsession with this musical is FAR from over. I will probably be spamming these at one point, but that's just how it will be.

[fearful-quartet]

So I've been listening to The Magnus Protocol, and managed to get my dad into TMA last year so he's now listening to Mag Protocol too. So last night we were listening in the car to the latest statement, and I was half-jokingly saying which fear the statement sounded like mostly, to which my dad starts talking about how he doesn't think these statements and the O.A.I.R are connected to the Fears at all. I'm gonna try to put a cut for anyone not caught up but here's how this led to a theory of mine:

So Lena said to Gwen that there's good and bad forces that need to be balanced, but she never said which side of that the O.A.I.R. is part of, if any. I was noting this when it hit me.

Every single Magnus Protocol Statement so far has been about misfortune coming around due to perceived fortune or a fortunate opportunity becoming misfortune.

Let's break this down ep by ep so you see what I mean.

Episode One: It's a little hard to figure out what the fortune is to the misfortune, especially since it's mostly getting us used to the characters and the overall setup of the show, but for the first statement I think it's not the statement giver, but the husband. Harriet (the one emailing) says he sounded excited in an unsettling way (I am assuming the "he" she is talking about is her husband since she doesn't mention anyone else). When she meets him, or what has him, she describes that he laughed and laughed. Her misfortune was his fortune, his joy.

The second statement in that episode of course is about the Institute, but by way of a bunch of spelunkers looking for something intriguing to discuss. I haven't quite figured out the connection here but I am sure there is one, even if it's through the characters (aka Sam) finding something within it.

Two: A lot easier to connect to this. Daria is finding joy through getting this tattoo that allows her to change how she looks and alter her appearance immensely (and grotesquely). Enough said.

Three: This statement is one that overall I just don't understand tbh, but I think it shows the opposite? As in the victim is experiencing fear and discomfort the entire time, but towards the end you'll notice he gets much more happy and calm about the situation.

Four: This is again easy, it's about a violin that needs blood but will give you amazing talent if you pay that price, and horrible bloodshed if you don't. Self-explanatory.

Five: The guy is trying to make a living off watching and reviewing horror movies, gets excited at a live showing of one just for him, then realizes it's not what it seems and posts everyone should see it. Easy enough. (Very Grifter's Bone in energy)

Six: The introduction to infamous new tumblr sexyman, Needles. I shouldn't have to spell out how he gets pleasure from others in pain by needles.

Seven: All I gotta say is it's "all for a good cause" and you should get the picture.

Eight: Utilizes that uncanny fear of false hospitality if you ask me, but either way this statement is clearly taking something associated often as comforting and twisting it.

Nine: The dice literally affect fortune and misfortune and likely make the statement giver into the embodiment of fortune. 'Nuff said.

Ten: Bonzo needs no explanation for this in his introductory episode so let's move on.

Eleven: This one goes more into obsession territory than anything, which is another running theme of the show and another theory, but it also talks about how the sea brings comfort so that could be part of it. (Also I noticed the sneaky possibly Dr. David reference in there lol)

Twelve: Now I know what you're gonna say, "How is this one connected to fortune at all, Cal? It's about some woman being traumatized at a strip club!" Well think about this: what if it wasn't supposed to end in Bonzo? Gwen gave Bonzo an "assignment," didn't she? And Lena pretty much outright says that this statement was that assignment. So it's possible this is what happened after stopping the initial outcome.

Thirteen: The latest episode as of typing this, and the most clear with evidence. The man literally gains a fortune from his own misfortune, so ya know it's right there.

So every statement is a good thing turned bad or a bad thing turned good. So what? Magnus Archives had plenty of statements similarly framed, so why am I focusing on it here?

Because what is the tagline for Magnus Protocol again?

Fear takes many forms.

[the-artist-sylveon]

I found a new ship to obsess over

introducing my latest brainrot: dragon x space raccoon (aka Dan Heng x Stelle from Honkai Star Rail)

they’ve all I’ve been drawing since July and I’m here for it

There’s a LOT more but they’re either too bad or require a TON of explaining as they pertain to an AU I’ve been writing (shameless plug of my AO3 of the same name)

[sgiandubh]

Hi!

Fitness Anon here…

On Friday S posted the „Hotel Highball“ video which was obviously recorded in Scotland, not in the US. 

So now „Miss I know it all“ aka Marple rushed to readjust her guessing game and sources about S’s whereabouts. Until the occurrence of this video she claimed he was still in L.A., but now she tells her audience he is back since Thursday… . Because she knows and has proof and facts. Sure? 🤔 It took only a video posted by the „ King of latergrams“ to doubt her own predictions? Is she so easy to unsettle? 

Hopefully right now these are better sources than the ones she claimed to have to indicate what S was up to this weekend and why he couldn’t attend the Con in Birmingham weeks ago. 

But she always keeps it vague so that she can adjust depending on the actual outcome so that it fits into her made-up storyline. 

So, grab your 🍿 and wait what’s up in her  crystal ball next. Perhaps she will also find answers there to the still unresolved question of his IG unfollows and his hair length in order to be able to place the recording of his latest booze video more precisely in time.

Dear, poor (returning) Fitness Anon,

You must have the patience of an angel and put up with me being awfully, rudely late, here. However, and one more time: all of the above, and then some more.

Key quote being: 'But she always keeps it vague so that she can adjust depending on the actual outcome so that it fits into her made-up storyline.'

The beauty of your submission is shining through, here. You sent this to me a week ago (and I do humbly apologize, it's been crazy and yes, life-changing, down here) and yet nothing fundamentally changed, on that page. Same old, same old, not even different. BS presented as factoids, calumny and libel (different things, but they cover it all) towards people that are perceived as personal foes. In my book, to despise someone is to ignore someone, not to actively ill wish on them. Yet the person (a he? a she? doubt is allowed) never got that memo and keeps on victimizing themselves.

At the end of the day, that page reads like an umpteenth season of The Young and The Restless: you can miss I don't know how many episodes, you'll always find your way back to a stalling script.

So, dear Fitness Anon, cue in another round of obsessive talking in circles about S, mendacity on top (Ashley Anon was evidence enough of that and I have to say I was a bit surprised). This, and copying even my mannerisms - hence my complete disdain.

PS: Despina Vandi Anon, you have been waiting for a very long time and I hope you could forgive me for that. This week's audio will be for you. But now, onwards to some cookery. I always found it supremely relaxing for the brain.

[rmd-writes]

a love note (and some fics)

Sometimes I wonder if there's really anything bigger out there - the universe, some kind of higher power, fate - and then I think about how extremely lucky I am that I became obsessed with a certain tv show and its characters at just the right time so that I could befriend someone who then introduced me to a particular book at exactly the right time to fall in love with those characters as well. And then, because of my need to have more of those characters, I went looking for more stories about them at exactly the right time to meet a group of people (some of them together, some of them later, but that doesn't matter) who would go on to become my friends.

There must be something, right? To bring together a group of people who live in five to seven different time zones depending on the time of year. To create my safest spaces on the internet. To share not just our love for a book and its characters, but parts of our lives with each other. To have them all wedge themselves into the soft spaces of my heart and never leave.

I've been thinking about this a lot over the last two weeks, because those people conspired and collaborated to gift me a collection of 10 incredible fics for a milestone birthday (tomorrow!) - even though some of them haven't written fic for months and months, or don't write for this fandom at all anymore, or have recently been finding it hard to make words work and finish fics, or are just plain busy with other projects and life. That they took the time to find and make words for me means everything and more 💖💖

I've been absolutely overwhelmed with love these past 10 days (probably to the surprise of no one, I have cried at every single fic drop and I'm crying writing this now). So, I want to share the wonderful fics that they've written for me with you all because it's the least I can do to pay it forward and they're objectively stellar fics. If you haven't come across them already then you should definitely add them to your to read lists/open tabs/MFL. Please show my friends some love and read their work.

The Rae of Sunshine! collection, in order of publication (with my very short summaries):

Take It Back (4.2K) by @three-drink-amy

Henry is the head chef at a French restaurant and there's one patron who keeps sending his dishes back. How can they resolve this?

Dick, Dick Dick (You Down) (10.2K) by @everwitch-magiks

Alex runs the craft services trailer on the set of actor!Henry's latest movie. Is he the only person who sees behind the façade?

A deceptively soft story, given the title.

Precious Love (1.3K) by floatingaway4

The fluffiest follow up to one of my favourite AUs Amigos y Migas (aka the food truck au).

Midnight ice cream (5.8K) by @the-amber-fox

Emotional support Cornettos? More likely than you think.

Make it Right (5.3K) by @three-drink-amy (that's right, Ally wrote me TWO FICS)

A rogue little Tarlos fic in amongst the firstprince - a post-season 1 canon divergence that sees TK working in a taco truck while he finds his feet.

a taste of life (7.4K) by @indomitable-love

A journey through Henry's life, told through food. (This one is not my summary, indomitablelove already summed it up perfectly)

Risotto + Melanzane + Dolce (a love story) (16.8K) by @villiageidiot

Alex starts working at an Italian restaurant and is terrible at his job. Somehow, Henry doesn't seem to mind.

Cursed is a State of Mind (WIP) by @welcometololaland & @dustratcentral

A 5 + 1 treatise on cursed coffee consumption.

12 Year Starter (6.6K) by @clottedcreamfudge

When Pez can't make it to Henry's Michelin-star birthday dinner, he arranges for Henry's friend, Alex, to take his place. Featuring CCF's signature banter and fun, and a menu that I wish was real.

Pour Your He(art) Out (WIP) by @athousandrooms

A 5+1 ode to latte art (featuring actual art!)

You can find the entire collection here on Ao3.

[hiemaldesirae]

picked up this book called 'murder your employee: the mcmasters guide to homicide vol 1' from my local bookstore and . Hmmm. am i hearing murder academy radiostatic au... (<- delusional)

quick rundown of the books setting (time period vaguely 1950s, before 1962 at the latest) is that there's this murder academy (i say that but its closer to a uni than a boarding school which is typically what i think of when i read academy) open to applicants of all ages to train their students to murder. the admissions fee is an extremely high price, but regular people can enter in via sponsorships (like scholarships, sort of, but its more like a specific rich person sponsoring the candidate). the students don't operate on a regular year by year schedule because 1) no one knows where the school is and thus cannot always tell even what season it is much less the month 2) students are informed of their graduation basically the day of, when the faculty decides theyre ready to leave and complete their thesis project (AKA the murder). anyway its a very fun book and so of course i had to be insane about its premise

For what it was worth, Alastor hadn't meant at all to end up studying at the Hazbin Institution for Homicide Practitioners.

Which, in fairness, was just a fancier way of saying that he hadn't meant to get caught.

It had been a situation entirely out of his control. For whatever reason, that night, the swamp had been especially difficult to navigate- even alone, much less with a bloodied and battered body slung over his shoulder, he's quite certain it would have been a struggle to work his way around the place. And while that had never been a problem the few dozen or so times he'd made the trek before (granted, they were without the actual body in his hands, but it didn't make much of a difference when he'd been carrying heavy sacks of sand to offset the weight), there was an unfortunate caveat in his plan.

He hadn't banked on being seen and followed by a truly infuriating pair of 'detectives' (though surely whatever idea they'd held of a detective was truly and fully siphoned from one of those insipid moving pictures his dear Mimzy was ever so obsessed with), and he hadn't expected to be offered a spot as a student at this... interesting facility.

The smiley man sitting in front of him nods emphatically as Alastor finishes his little cajoling speech. The nametag on his black and red suitjacket reads Dean Morningstar, and a half-poured cup of brandy sits on the side of his table. Alastor eyes the alcohol with interest, if only because looking anywhere else in the room might make him lose composure and attack the bothersome man sitting across from him.

"So, then... Mr. Hartfelt, is it true that your next target was to be your father?"

Alastor narrows his eyes at the dean. The room's atmosphere seems to drop as he holds his gaze, both of them wearing smiles that convey vastly different emotions. "I'm afraid I don't know what you're referring to."

Of course, such a lousy comeback isn't tantamount to a proper argument (unless you're the type who enjoys messing with people, which Alastor is in all moments except this one) and the dean smiles when he realizes Alastor's slip up.

"See, you have an extremely generous patron backing you on your goal... not only to take down your father, who, by the way, seems to owe you quite a lot, considering your less than stellar upbringing and childhood, so good luck with that one, but also in relation to the other bodies that have been found half-submerged in the swamp." The little devil smiles merrily. "Sorry about that one, by the way. But we had to be sure you were a good candidate for our very highly revered course list. I mean... your sponsor is paying a lot of money to see you succeed, so... we had to be pretty thorough. Again, sorry, but it's just standard protocol."

Alastor clenches his jaw, feeling his eye twitch. He'd more or less tuned out whatever else Dean Morningstar had said after he admitted to resurfacing the already weeks old bodies in the swamp- Alastor's very first targets- as a means of... assessing him, apparently. "So you're the reason the bodies have started turning up in the bayou...?"

"Not entirely," Dean Morningstar shrugs, providing no further context. "In any case, this is sort-of a caught with pants down situation, I think. You don't have many options, Mr. Hartfelt. Either you stay as a student, or we let the truth out- and let your mother know first, before getting rid of you."

He grins sunnily at Alastor. "What will it be, young man?"

So, that was that.

Following that conversation (blackmailing session) Alastor finds himself being the unwitting recipient of a campus guide by the dean himself, who, despite his short stature and seemingly accomodating personality, had already managed to make himself an enemy in the form of one (1) incredibly vexed young radio host slash serial killer in the making.

"...And that's the Music Hall, where my vice-dean and most beloved wife holds her concerts and lectures on Murder, as a Fine Arts- you may notice the ingenious references there to one Mr. Thomas De Quincey, the famed opium eater of the 1800s London..." Alastor turns a blind eye to the dean as the man just kept on talking, choosing instead to focus on the surroundings instead of the urge to strangle the annoyance beside him.

The trip to the Hazbin Institution for Homicide Practitioners- a mouthful and an incredibly unnecessary one at that- had been less a trip to a school and more like a kidnapping, in which Alastor had been more or less blackmailed into going with the two detectives who'd found him in the bayou that day and then drugged to high hell from some sort of tampered liquor, then promptly deposited in front of the school gates and almost fed broken glass twice before nearly being poisoned and then having to sit through another blackmailing session with the Dean (the guy who'd tried to poison him in the first place). So... all in all, a rather unpleasant experience on his end.

Still, the scenery almost made up for it.

The campus was almost the size of his town back home, and towering gothic buildings from before his time populated the grounds. Signs in different languages were littered around the campus grounds, and exotic foliage grew in just the right places to make the patchwork of cobbled streets and oddly vintage buildings look uniform.

"Oh, Vox! How are you this afternoon?"

Alastor's attention is drawn back to the dean as the man greets a young man dressed in formal evening attire, complete with a pocket square boutonniere and sleek black gloves. The man in question has short-ish black hair, tied back into a small ponytail with a deep blue ribbon, and two striking eyes: one a glassy larimar blue and the other the deep brown of axinite gems. Alastor finds himself regarding the other while he and the dean make simple conversation. Something about him strikes him as familiar, though he can't quite put a finger on it exactly. "Going to the Music Hall, I presume?"

"That would be correct, Sir," Vox inclines his head respectfully. "Professor Leviathan asked us to dress for the occasion, since we would be doing another ballroom class."

"Ballroom class?" Alastor raises an eyebrow, and the man startles, seemingly not having noticed he was there. Rather inept for an assassin-to-be, Alastor frowns. Were these really the sorts of students they were training? Pretty-faced civilians knowing nothing of killing, who dressed up in evening gather for afternoon classes?

"A-ah, yes..." Vox looks off to the side, seemingly nervous. His cheeks redden slightly, like a child caught in the act of stealing candy. "Uh. You're new here, right? I haven't seen you around before..."

"He is," Dean Morningstar confirms, beaming. "Just arrived this morning, with a very generous sponsor backing him. In fact, he's going to be rooming at Pride House because of the sponsor!"

"Oh, is that so?"

Vox's easy confidence seems to come back to him as he turns to Alastor, seemingly mollified by the Dean's interference. Something inside of Alastor wants to see the man nervous again, if only because the uneasy approach of the man with the gemstone eyes reminded him of the shaky-footed does he would fake out during hunts. "Well, in that case, we might be roommates. It's nice to meet you, Mister...?"

"Hartfelt. Alastor Hartfelt," Dean Morningstar says before Alastor can introduce himself, smiling even when Alastor directs a glare at the man. "He's quite the upstart, I'll have you know- Hell, I think he may have set more fires on his first day here than you did!"

Vox chuckles awkwardly, a reaction that has Alastor's eyebrows raising with curiosity. "Well, I'd sure hope not. I really wouldn't want to cause Professor Leviathan any more trouble than we already have. He deserves a bit of a break from troublemakers like us, I'd say."

While Alastor is... okay, not really all that sure what exactly Dean Morningstar was referring to with 'fires started'- in his case, they were all non literal, considering his first arrival here had ended with him on the wrong end of a shotgun (its irony was not lost to him now, three hours later and standing in the middle of what looked to be a town square plucked straight out of Vienna's bustling populace despite the fact that they were in a location completely unknown to the rest of the world)... but whatever this man had done... it intrigued him, especially given Vox's reaction to it.

"Anyway..." Vox smiles once more, inclining his head in a bow. "I really do have to get going now. If I don't, I'm afraid I may be late, and Professor Asmodeus always picks on the latecomers to answer questions first."

"Ah, we won't keep you any longer, then," Dean Morningstar agrees genially. "Have a good afternoon, Mister Vanhal!"

"You too, Dean Morningstar, Mister Hartfelt," Vox bows once more, before turning off and heading in the direction of the Music Hall. Alastor regards the other man's retreating silhouette carefully.

"Is there something you want to say, young man?" Dean Morningstar snaps him out of his reverie, covering the faint smirk on his face with a gloved hand.

While Alastor wishes he could simply meet the other with simple derision, there is a question he had been meaning to ask. "What was the evening get up for?"

Dean Morningstar shrugs, but there's a glint of something Alastor doesn't quite like in his eyes. "Why don't you go and ask Vox yourself, if you're so interested?"

"...I'm surprised your staff haven't tried to murder you yet," Alastor responds shortly. He's much too tired and frustrated to entertain the man, and- well, frankly put, his mind is a little distracted at the moment at the thought of the man with the mismatched eyes.

Dean Morningstar laughs. "They're certainly welcome to try, as are you. After all, you're now a student of the Hazbin Instution for Homicide Practitioners- and we pride ourselves on our hands-on, engaging curriculum. Hopefully, your sponsor finds what they're looking for by sending you here."

"Hopefully," Alastor agrees. After all, there's nothing else to say: from here on out, it seems to be do or die.

Student Report written with input and conference from Dean Lucifer Morningstar

Student: Alastor Hartfelt, 29 years old, Sponsor

Sponsor: [REDACTED]

To the esteemed and generous sponsor of one Mister Alastor Hartfelt,

Enclosed is a report of your charge's first day at our esteemed institution. Please dispose of this report as soon as you are finished reading it for privacy insurances. We at the Hazbin Institution for Homicide Practitioners thank you for your interest and your patronage.

Sincerely, Dean Lucifer Morningstar.

[bitter69uk]

I am unrepentantly garrulous about my obsession with the Sam Pancake Presents the Monday Afternoon Movie podcast, in which our effervescent host disinters and forensically (and hilariously) analyzes ultra-kitsch unloved made-for-TV movies from the seventies and eighties. In his latest installment Pancake is joined by guest Andrew Hopf to discuss freaky 1973 ABC thriller Scream, Pretty Peggy. (The weirdly un-tantalizing tagline “A pretty co-ed’s part-time job leads to a bizarre pay-off!” barely hints at what an oddity this movie is). The titular Peggy (played by Sian Barbara Allen) is a hopelessly naïve and gauche mooncalf-type who takes a housekeeping job at the Elliott family mansion presided over by sculptor son Jeffrey (Ted Bessell – aka Marlo Thomas’ fiancé Donald from That Girl!) and fearsome gorgon-like alcoholic mama Mrs. Elliott (special guest star Bette Davis, pictured. Wait until you hear Pancake’s Davis impression). If Peggy wasn’t so damn unworldly, alarm bells would be ringing. Jeffrey’s menacing satanic sculptures are clearly the expression of a troubled psyche. Then there’s the conspicuously absent mysterious sister Jennifer everyone keeps referring to. “She went to Europe, I think,” Mrs. Elliott explains not very convincingly. “Yes. Europe.” What follows is heavily (and I mean HEAVILY) indebted to Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho. For Davis completists, Scream is a must. This dates from her wilderness years when her opportunities were limited to obscure films no one saw (like Connecting Rooms (1970), Bunny O’Hare (1971) and The Scientific Cardplayer (1972)) and flop TV pilots (The Judge and Jake Wyler (1972), Madame Sin (1972). Davis is on ferocious hagsploitation form here and her delivery of the line “I fell. I’m sorry. I’m afraid. I’ve. Broken. My. LEG” alone makes this gem worth catching. (Scream, Pretty Peggy used to be viewable on YouTube (that’s where I watched it years ago) but has since been deleted. It IS available on DVD and Blu-ray as of 2021).  

[wingtoots]

I’d like to thank @llamagoddessofficial and @aka-indulgence for filling my maladaptive daydreams

Had to sketch my latest obsession- Horror Sans from aka-indulgence fic “Stay” and hmf!Sans by both mentioned above <3