#again im like speaking from experience idk i think the whole thing of like everyone just yelling into the void all the time about how they

[mellotronmkll]

I know this is really rich coming from me as an autistic person with extreme social difficulties but because of those difficulties I think a lot about this kind of thing and have spent a lot of time like. Testing different things out and I have to say in case someone really takes this advice like genuinely the bottom thing is sweet but really not a good way to start a conversation. my advice to you as someone who struggles to start conversations and wants to talk to / get more friendly with people is to message them about something specific ! Like if you want to have conversations about a fictional character you both like: message them a specific question about that character! Or if you notice oh they seem to like talking about xyz themes in this piece of media or like. they're really passionate about this specific thing I also like. Just ask them a question about it! Or If they post art you like message them directly about a specific piece of art etc ... you should start with something small and specific rather than being like Hey we are similar let's talk about this thing it's best to be like Hey your take on this specific thing you posted is super interesting, I totally agree and I was also thinking about how ...etc you know what I mean. I find a really good way if you want to start talking to someone but are nervous about messaging first to kind of make it seem less scary/out of the blue is rather than reblogging one of their posts and adding commentary in the tags, if it's something you know you can both get excited about..just send them the post and tell them what you were gonna say in the tags directly. But like you're gonna have a way better time if you find something really specific you know you both are excited about to talk to them about rather than just sending a vague "hey I think you're really cool and wanna be friends" type message. I understand that that it feels like a lot easier but I know from experience being on both ends it's not really gonna go anywhere. You just have to start a little conversation about something small and specific. And maybe it will fizzle out after a few exchanges but then you can keep doing that. That's how that starts and it just takes time. Like just sending someone a post and being like this reminded me of you because its something you know they like is a way better start. Also like I think that post that was going around the other day shows that a lot of people on this site (myself included) feel a lot of anxiety about like . Noticing things about people and then talking to them about those things but. It's okay to do that and if you remember things about people and bring them up to them its actually like. How you form connections

[prosciuttoon]

Toshiro/Shuro is overhated

(mirror of my thread on twitter)

ever wanted to talk abt something so bad but u have so many thoughts so u cant even begin to organize a sentence. thats me abt shuro and its why i cant give my thoughts on him. i NEED to get this out of my system bc its takign up so much memory in my brain i need that space for thinking.

so i was really surprised to find so much hate for him even tho he seems pretty normal and rational out of the whole cast. ive deducted that its mostly abt his laios fight and that the ppl who hate him probably had bad experiences w social cues and relationships w neurotypicals bc of that. theres no way to avoid it bc its pretty much Right In Your Face that laios is ND. but thats not the only factor in why their relationship is rocky. its also the culture barrier. u have to understand toshiro was raised as JAPANESE NOBILITY ofc he would be a little conservative

also culture shock. idk if u know this but jp culture is very Mind Your Own Business like a lot of other asian cultures . ofc hes gonna be weirded out by a stranger invading his space. also his names not even Shuro. its just yt ppl not pronouncing his name right and settling for whats easiest.

img src: fan translation by savaralyn2 , i think its from the adventurers bible Complete Edition bc i dont remember it in the old one

ok you get the gist of the culture aspect of it. lets go into the ND/NT clash aspect of it. yes i understand its pretty hurtful to never be told when youre acting inappropriately. i am autistic too lmao. but you have to understand that shiro is one guy and he even does realize that repressing things is one of his fatal flaws. again. asian culture. non confrontational. that sorta thing. but these are genuine frustrations. if i were him id be annoyed too but id speak out about it. set boundaries. bc im blunt. shiros not. he was taught crazy strict manners (hierarchies, respect, politeness, etc).

his problem isnt ableism its a culmination of culture barriers, how he was raised to behave, and terrible lack of communication as thing caused by "all of the above" plus he just generally keeps to himself a lot which means repressing frustrations that will explode leading to a pathetic fistfight while hes starved, exhausted, and dehydrated. also. if he was ableist he would hate laios. he doesnt hate laios. at the end of the day, they are friends. NT and ND ppl can be friends u know. there will be rifts (like their fight) but you just have to communicate misunderstandings. theyre gonna be fine lol

anyways that was my whole spiel abt it. i think i got everything out that i wanted to? my head still feels a little full so i may add more later when i remember something

also i think its a little unfair to rule out the possibility of laios and him just being 2 very different kinds of ND bc its very common for misunderstandings to occur even then. EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT BUT WE NEED TO COMMUNICATE TO UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER! but for the sake of interpreting the Fight as a commentary on NT social rules and ND frustration, ill say toshiros NT. will we ever know? hes so far in the sidelines... youd really have to dig in the extra content to see the intricacies of his character.... please give him a chance

[imeriayapping]

ooh Ukrainian logan sounds SO interesting, and ohmygosh loscar didsliking each other ive never heard of that before but im SO HERE for it give me their enemies to lovers stories and FEM LOSCAR TO GOOD LUCK BABE (ohmygosh is lando going to be like 'the husband' or smth and oscar just thinking abt logan I CANT)

anyways yeah i'd like to hear abt those 3 if u wouldn't mind :)

OFC OFC

I'll start with Ukrainian logan bc there quite a bit to talk about sjdnksnss

I think it's half way just a way to deal with trauma and half way just trying to make people understand bc there isn't a lot of people with experience of living through war and honesty telling it through characters is much easier.

But at the same time i can imagine adding something cute like, logan didn't really need his English being all that good bc it was enough to get by when he started but then he met oscar and he starts making effort to learn just so they could speak or oscar learning words just for him bc Ukrainian is VERY hard language to learn so even with that he appreciates the effort. Or maybe Logan starting to use 'logan' as a name bc everyone butchered his actual name (I'm thinking about левко which would be something like levkyo i guess????)But at the same time there constant pressure when he's in f1 to present Ukraine, to speak up for those almost 500 athletes that never will be able to bc they are killed. On this situation he's not isolated by being from stated but there quite a bit to be isolated by nonetheless.

It would be very interesting to just write about some of my own experience or something i see our athletes that compete international expressing. Also showing our culture a bit would be cool too.

To the next one!

Loscar disliking eachother is not like enemies to lovers it's just reaaaaaaaaaaly long bit. They had some comedically small disagreement and played it up in video or some interview or post, idk. And people didn't catch that it was mostly a joke so they just continued with it, going through ranks never speaking publicly but actually getting even better friends over scheming about it and then they get to f1, their dislike for eachother is quite evident and everyone confused trying to find the reason and someone digs up some old photos(maybe one from the fridge) and everyone is even more confused bc why did they stopped talking and they continue with a bit unstoppably laughing at some crazy theory about it all. In the end they tell the world that it was bc of their disappointment of the right way to eat oreos or something

And the last one!

TOXIC YURI MY BELOVED

this one is of fem loscar that got separated after f3 bc logan (and I'll keep their names as it is) but logan stayed for uni or something similar bc she never wanted to be away from racing but she haven't had a way to get back since. At the same time she watches from the sidelines as oscar makes history for women in motosport with back to back to back wins and she just silently suffers and randomly gets reconnected with lando and they start dating and at first she genuinely believes that she likes him but when she meets oscar again for the first time in few years, second woman to score points in f1, having steady amazing career and also a girl that she shared kisses with in different hotel rooms it all comes crashing down and they have a lot of tention while lando ignores all of it and there a ton of inner conflict for logan throughout whole thing

Something like that :p

[ghostboyhood]

TELL ME YOUR COMMUNITY THOUGHTS

oh lord okay.. im gonna give my thoughts on the last season ish because i just finished it so its what i mainly remember and its 1 am..

the anniejeff made me SO uncomfortable i dont understand why they kept pushing that when they also pushed the dad-daughter relationship throughout the show.... and the second to last episode being centered around incest was odd, not a huge fan of that..

now okay my MAIN thoughts are about abed, so here i go

i feel like in the last two seasons (maybe 4 too? i dont remember atm) abeds autistic" traits were completely stripped from him. yes they included all his "fourth wall breaking meta tv show lines" but it wasnt right.

and i understand people will eventually change/grown up but also.. you cant "fix" autistic traits so it just felt like they were trying to make his autism seem more "normal" also by making him more emotionless i realized? abed cant express himself well, which he mainly copes with by dissociating. but he just.. in the last seasons it seemed more like he DIDNT have emotions (i believe he says something like this to buzz when talking about his duck comics, along the lines of the emotions he cant feel or wtv) but this isnt right, abed is emotional, hes actually really emotional we just dont see it directly like we do with people like annie or troy..

speaking of emotions im glad they really explained that jeff was scared of change and everyone leaving at the end though, its always been known that he is, but i liked that they really Showed it

annies ending was nice i guess? she was basically just a prop for jeff though in the weird fucking fantasy he wants though??? again idk why theyre pushing that it felt so out of place and weird and ew. jeff was also uncomfortably violent in season 6, like i dont think he would ever choke abed out that made me feel so gross...

alright back to abed because hes the main one i noticed in the last seasons.

in the end where abed was talking to jeff in the bar and said like.. "ik ur comforted by this meta lens but this is reality!!" just felt wrong.. yeah abed was still meta w the whole tv show thing but that was it.. and then him saying that to jeff? its like they tried to make him this big mentor guy to jeff (idk if thats necessarily it but its all i can think of to describe it at the moment) but not in a friend way but an uncomfortable "im grown up now and ur not" way if that makes sense,, which again goes with stripping him of his autistic traits by making it seem like its completely necessary to Grow up in order to move forward in life which isnt.. its true in some ways but not in the way they portrayed it at all.. they make it seem like abed had to grow up completely in order for him to "be okay"..

i related a LOT to abed in the early seasons for Many reasons, i think they handled the abed centered episodes especially about his mental health EXTREMELY Well. (ie, abeds uncontrollable christmas) its one of the first times ive seen experiences like that in media that i can almost directly relate to yk? but after geothermal escapism its all gone, never mentioned again besides in call backs where they try to laugh it off/dismiss it..

oh my god and abeds 'girlfriend' was just sooo out of place she was mentioned like twice and then that was it.. they didnt need to do that it felt really forced

also in like season one abed sits in that fucking room for hoursss without so much as making a peep but then he looses his cool and yells at buzz in season five?? again troy just left which makes a big impact but its still smt i noticed

everyone just felt very bland in the last seasons after troy left at least… half the cast was gone, then replaced

idk im not like, ruined the show pissed at the end, but im also not a fan of s5/6 (besides like.. sum scenes, and like i mentioned earlier maybe s4 as well)

i have to binge tv shows so i dont always immediately retain all the information and i have to rewatch episodes a lot, but thats my thoughts immediately after finishing the show at 12 am, sleep deprived, and in a really bad mental health episode so theyre not well put together n shit and i wish i could remember more to go over but alas

theres my immediate thoughts,, im gonna probably sleep or restart community.. i was planning on starting interview with the vampire now but im thinking of starting black mirror so we'll see...

[holidayslinger]

demanding buddie shippers + eddie girlies speak up every time something happens to a bucktommy shipper is a piece of self-righteous bullshit. we don’t have to denounce every single incident that happens just because you and your friends believe it’s one of us because a majority of the time it isn’t. you guys don’t give a shit about us when we get death threats, when we’re told to kill ourselves, when our sexualities are invalidated, when our voices are spoken over by white fans, etc. you have no right to demand action from us when you are silent across the board.

i have said this several times so it’s the last ask i’m going to answer about it:

i denounce this type of behavior from anyone and everyone in any fandom no matter what they ship or what random opinion or ship or character they think they’re defending by harassing people on their blogs or in their online spaces. i can only speak when i know what’s happening. i am going to speak up when my friends are being harassed or when i see proof of harassment and that is not going to stop. i don’t care who it is or who it’s coming from.

i said several times yesterday that buddie is actually my preferred ship between the two, even tho i like both and eddie is literally my favorite character and i have friends on both sides of the fight. it just so happens that the ones on the bucktommy side are the ones that have gotten harassed in some of the most horrible moments of their lives and liking tommy is the only thing that i have *personally* been attacked for. people can only speak on their own experiences.

i said, also, that if anyone out there following me thinks harassing people over their fictional blorbo pairings is okay - no matter what they ship - they aren’t someone i care or wish to interact with. i don’t know what else i can say. i’m not denying that shitty people exist everywhere.

i just don’t see what’s so bad about saying “i don’t condone this behavior.” even if you don’t think it’s a buddie fan fully with your whole heart it says a lot that everyone’s reaction is to come scream at people for saying “you’re actually bad for saying people not do this” rather than just going “man i really hope someone i know wouldn’t do this and i hope they wouldn’t but just know it’s not something i condone.”

i said it yesterday and i’ll say it again: i’ve never been attacked for liking eddie or liking buddie by people in that side of the fandom. however, i’ve been blocked by literal friends, harassed, and sent messages like this one for simply defending my own friends who are being harassed and liking for tommy. i don’t know where im supposed to think it’s coming from.

this is never okay. its not okay on either side and if anyone - anyone - i know on any side or no side thinks its okay i dont want to know them. i keep saying that and somehow its just getting lost and lost and i really fully am tired of explaining it.

no one is saying buddie shippers have to speak out every time something happens but you know what would be nice? if they would acknowledge *any time* it happened - if they would say one time hey i don’t think this is a buddie shipper really but if it is stop. but even over the summer when it was widespread and nasty the gut reaction is just to say ‘i know the ones being targeted are not us but you know there’s NO WAY it’s one of us’.

idk how many times i have to say im a buddie shipper. they’re my absolutely favorites. they’re probably one of my favorite ships of all time and for me, personally, it says a lot that in this us or them landscape of fandom i automatically separate from All Other Buddie Fans because i dare to like other things or say some of the things on the buddie side of fandom make me feel uncomfortable.

and just in case it wasn’t clear: i will never be silent. if i see something like this i absolutely will say something. i don’t care what side of fandom you’re on. so if i haven’t said anything about someone experiencing harassment it’s because i haven’t seen it. i’m very sorry if you’ve been harassed. no one deserves it, especially over fictional things on the internet.

[azsazz]

Will you please please give us your thoughts on Iron Flame?!?!

Fourth Wing/Iron Flame Spoilers below cut!

So...

First off, there was so much world building that I was kind of confused. I just kind of gave up at some point and read it for the characters lol. maybe it's because i didn't re-read fourth wing before.

the names of everything was a little annoying because they were all so unique i spent like two minutes trying to figure out how to pronounce everything. like she has four basic names (liam, sloane, violet, jack) and the rest I'm like ?!?!?!? WHO?

Speaking of Jack...I'm not sure I liked that whole thing. There wasn't any alluding to the fact that he'd be back in the first book, and I feel like he basically appeared out of nowhere in the second. Yes, we knew the healer was helping mend his soul (which is interesting af to me because how many others could they have helped? or is it just because he was a venin?) but the man literally had a fucking mountain dropped on him?! No way he would've survived I'm sorry.

I thought all of the fighting between her and Xaden was kind of annoying...like come on. And we learned so much about xaden but not at all at the same time?! like, now he can read minds, which means violet misinterpreted the sage/venin dreams because I'm assuming they came from xaden now, he was probably projecting them on her subconsciously.

chapter 48 was hot tho, the throne sex stuff, always a banger in my book.

why the hell was everyone keeping so many secrets from violet. like xaden, the dragons, her family...they keep saying how smart she is and stuff but like, that doesn't mean she should have to figure out everyones secrets for themselves?! betrayal.

also, how the fuck does someone become venin? was that explained in the first book or this one because now xaden is somehow one and idk how that happened?!

low-key i'm happy dain and her are getting closer again, but also your childhood's best friend's dad trying to kill you? i feel like that was unwarranted tbh. then he got sent away because of it and i wonder if he's going to make a reappearance.

also, andarna...she was hardly in the damn book. and i didn't think her lines were anything really special. i feel like she's basically only in the book for one specific plot point and the rest she's just off sleeping or with the elders or doing something else so ry doesnt have to write her?

omg the part where nadine said she was violet and that guy immediately snapped her neck was fucking WILD.

and the whole thing with cat was like petty as fuck but her power seems interesting. i enjoyed reading the challenge violet had when she was messing with her emotions.

let's see...i wonder what violet's second signet is going to be. she kept mentioning how well andarna could blend into her surroundings so im wondering if invisibility is one that could happen...or maybe the transportation one that they said hadn't been a thing for a long time. i feel like why mention that if she isn't going to bring that back too.

also, the headers before each chapter scare me. RECOVERED letters from xaden to violet....recovered from where and why whats going to happen 😭

wow, this was a lot of thoughts lol...i also want a bonus chapter from tairn or another dragons pov because i feel like him and sgayl were fighting a lot this book but i want to know what they're saying to each other.

overall, i enjoyed the read and the midnight release experience was so much fun and cute and clever and i def think they should bring those back. maybe for cc3 they'll do that!

[botseeksbot]

finished s7🖕

started off so so so good (so so so so so so good) but then it turned to suckkkkk . brocks writing just hasnt been great since s3 w a few good eps here and there but just turned to major suck when you see him w the ventures . guild operative and osi operative romance got too much screentime . still dislike 21 and i think him being the monarch's "best friend" just makes them boring . could have done smth irt him being alone w his wife gone and w a henchman he doesnt care for (<- the sudden jump of him loving 21 in s5 was so annoying) or smth . i feel the blue morpho could still work w that that would be fun a dedicated henchman working w a boss who will do whatever to rise to the top even if the boss doesnt like him . speaking of . total drop in the whole BM thing and kind of made it stupid to have him kill villains to rise the ranks but then they just have him do random ass jobs and hes level 10? kind of makes his whole speech in PfT in 6 abt GCI levels kind of stupid . the loss of focus on the ventures in general just does not appeal to me i like the monarchs and conjectech but im not watching the show for them . also did i mention how much brock sucks . should have been more focus in hank and dean esp of theyre gonna have deans speech in the finale (rly good actually did make me sniffle)

irt def more things to explore ik you are a gayboy . would have been interesting to see him come to terms w being a superscience experiment by bonding w jared bc i feel like jared would have some talk abt it not being so bad and bring up the positives (did like sirena's comment on the clone thing though) . rly funny he mentions jared in his speech but you never see them interact s7. his whole character has been a mess since s4 though (actually all the ventures have been but whatever) . this was a characterization that pissed me off though similar to his daddy in s4 for me . i like him missing hank and wanting to go back to being just them and him missing the compound . could have been really good if they actually focused on the family aspect of the show...!!! really wish they fucking did but they ruined my family...!!! that fucking osi dog...!!!

hank didnt really add anything im sorry that happened to you babyboy. hank gets focus but nothing really happens to him. not much to say but he was cute and sigh again a lot of missed opportunities for the Whole Reason I Watch The Show

rusty was more similar to his s4 character but not quite but still annoyed me except brock annoyed me more (major sucks btw) so rusty is safe from my wrath . idk where im going w this now . i wish it was more about the ventures . so many lost opportunities since s4 . everthing brock touched turned to suck i cant even appreciate him shirtless and bloody and killing people why are you such an osi doormst this season . brock sucks so much . rusty really adding nothing but was oh so perfect the 1st 3 eps . i want the family fuck off everyone else the monarchs should have stayed background/main antags or smth i dont need the focus same w billy and white my god i just want the ventures . so many things that could have been explored but werent so instead i have to see kimberly and the guild dude try to have a romance across several episodes w development and tragedy and everything but my ventures get nothing irt to any of them except ig deans speech that comes out of left field bc i havent seen the family interact in what feels like forever . also brock sucks

[lightningandfireinmybones]

okay i had a thought?

Disclaimer I have been listening to this while studying (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qw9_FJv2oAY&list=PLjFwUFnGRUqOtc9INZDomQlb0D-4Eu0QI&index=3&ab_channel=ASMRrooms). so you understand... i got carried away

What if in the canon universe, we gave Val the Saera treatment but with a few tweaks? She isnt related to Daemyra at all and is just a valyrian bastard from Essos? We can pretend she is the daughter of one of Saera's many sons. She has inherited the valyrian looks though. Now what if Val having grown up in Lys had been taken as an.. apprentice (?), a ward (?) at one of the pillowhouses there? Maybe even Saera's (although i think she moved to volantis later in life?)

She works the work. She is the best. Men and Women travel from across the continent just to spend a night with her. They sell their fleets, they offer their jewels and gold. Forgotten weapons made from valyrian steel are given to her just so she'll spare them a glance. Not only does she have the blood of old valyria - being a targaryen bastard- but also she is distantly related to the Targs ruling over Westeros. She is a big deal. Now, after a while she gets bored there. Everyone is eating off the palm of her hands, she was them wrapped around her fingers. It's the same song over and over again. So she decides to pack up a few things and make her way west, just to see what that strange place is like, where everyone is so uptight and where her family of old rule.

She eventually makes her way to King's Landing. She decides to visit one of the brothels there and act like a complete novice at first. (maybe though she tells them who she is so that they will hire her?)

She meets Aegon though she keeps her distance. She doesn't really want to Know these people. It's like sight seeing for her. So she uses what sway she has to ensure Aegon is kept away from her.

One night Aemond shows up to pick up aegon as one does. She sees him and she's fucked. While aemond is waiting she approaches him, starts nonchalantly singing in valyrian, wanting him to notice her but without looking too desperate. And he does.

a young valyrian woman speaking their tongue, how does she even know how?

poor, faith guilt ridden, sexualy aversed by the brothel (understandably so)and also frustrated Aemond feels for the first time ever attracted to another person. (one who looks just like him how's that for Therapy?)

he visits more often just to see her. She keeps being subtle about it. he isnt. eventually he finds the inner strength to introduce himself (one can only get So frustrated before snapping).

im not thinking that aemond will stay guilt ridden for too long. there's a mean bad very horrible dom in there hiding. fuck the faith. all he needs is some guidance (corruption) by someone who cares about him. and Val has been game since moment 1. besides -ive never been religious so idk- aren't people who come from very restrictive religions the most delectable closeted sinners?

NAUR BESTIE PLS I LOVE THIS THINKING MANY THOTS I GOT CARRIED AWAY

because valaena without her grounding family and brothers is completely unhinged, without real self preservation and impulse control,,, so she's out here doing whatever the fuck she wants

in this world, we have valaena groomed to be the very best courtesan, trained in seduction and manipulation, to use her looks as a weapon and keep her mind sharp and deadly behind walls nobody else can get past

and val is good at that,,, she's good at getting her lovers to give up their whole lives, to throw fortunes at her, but she never really feels fulfilled, like she's seen or done it all,,, still, her fame grows as word of the bastard targaryen beauty spreads,,, even making it as far as to westeros, to the family that is not that distantly removed from her

the whole song and dance of being a world famous courtesan is starting to grow old,,, she longs for adventure, for adrenaline, to feel alive again, to experience something new that will make her blood sing

rumors reach her of war in westeros, of the rogue prince and the one-eyed prince, of the dragons that bond and bow to targaryen blood

in the dead of the night, she disappears from essos, nothing more than a memory and a rumor, talks of pale targaryen ghosts haunting each port she sails through on her way to king's landing

word of her reputation and skill make it to westeros before she does, and she has her pick of brothels to work at, to make her home there

she chooses something classy but discreet, that is willing to let her observe at first, to linger back and learn the ropes of this strange place where her silver hair and purple eyes get bows and looks of fear, in addition to the lust and the excitement she's used to in essos

the first targaryen she sees and meets is aegon, of course, but he almost ruins the experience for her,,, this is the legacy of her family? a drunk who likes to watch children fight??? content to linger in the shadows, valaena continues to observe, still searching for that spark of excitement she was chasing when she came here

but then,,, aemond comes to pick up aegon

and he's everything she was hoping for, the one-eyed prince in the flesh and its like being struck by lightning,,, he doesn't look twice at any of the women or men in the brothel, content to glower and twirl a dagger between his fingers as he broods and waits for his brother,,, she has to have him, but she knows he will not be easy

but valaena is talented and patient and knows how to manipulate men,,, she drapes herself over the windowsill, making sure the moonlight catches the silver of her curls just right, and sings the most haunting valyrian lullaby

aemond, for his end, is also fucked,,, there's this woman, something out of his deepest darkest dreams, looking like a goddess and singing a language she's not supposed to know, curly hair drifting over an exposed shoulder, the sleeve of her gown slipping down

then, she stands and sails past him, walking so gracefully it almost looks like she's gliding over the cobblestones, leaving nothing but a hint of jasmine and lemon perfume in the air

for the first time, aemond wants. he knows clinically about attraction and sex, has studied up until he has mastered even his own disinterest, but she blows up his carefully structured walls, one haunting note at a time,,,, he's wrapped up in confusion and guilt and frustrated and angry that the first time he wants a woman like this, it's a courtesan who looks like a targaryen bastard who paid him no mind at all

that doesn't stop him from coming back, collecting aemond personally night after night in hopes of catching a glimpse of that courtesan, a hint of that perfume

when he gets worked up enough to finally ask aegon about her, he's surprised when his brother laughs, telling him that "her name is valaena, and no, she won't fuck you. she doesn't fuck anyone here,,, believe me i tried"

the glimpses he catches of her at the brothel are confusing,,, a bruise on her collarbone that makes something inside of him ache, a quick laugh with another girl that stops him in his tracks, a flash of lavender eyes hiding a razor-sharp intelligence

he prays for guidance, but finds his mind wandering to her little gasp of surprise when he'd passed her in the hallways, the glimpse of cleavage in her gowns, the flash of thigh as she'd hopped down from a horse (ASTRIDE,,,, THE AUDACITY),,, he loses the relief of religion, for she has sullied even that for him,,, he gets angrier and angrier the more she is so close but never actually touching him or speaking to him past a few casual words in Valyrian

she's always just out of reach, but so close,,, valaena grinds aemond down until one day he snaps, approaching her in the rose gardens as she trims some blossoms, determined to finally solve the mystery of the seemingly celibate valyrian courtesan, paying a small fortune for the privilege of a night in her bedroom

he doesn't mean to throw her against the wall when he enters her chambers, doesn't mean to let his hands slide down her hips with a proprietary grip,,, but he also can't seem to help himself when it comes to her

layer by layer, valaena peels him until the unhinged dom emerges:')

[bigstupiddummie]

making a post in the tags to “call out” a person is so dumb and childish and stupid, so i won’t put this in there. however, the admin of @wavehq is full lying on my name these days even though i haven’t talked to them or anyone else involved in there in like 6mos. and i rly want them to stop.

i don’t have my old discord account w ss. if anyone else has ss with me in them, u can add them to this post idc how ugly it makes me look. i talked a LOT of shit ( and pertaining to this story, about sel esp ) and called ppl some nasty names and any ss will incriminate me of that. so me talking shit isn’t a ‘gotcha’ anymore. i talked shit and called sel names, as well as k, and i know sel called me names, and im sure everyone else did too. whatevs.

yk what i never did ? i never made a “manifesto” about my ex friend, or priv-retweeted their personal ooc twitter account to mock them. i never helped create and work on an rpt blog, then went and consoled the person being mentioned in nasty messages in the blog on some “oh im so sorry this is happening to you ˙◠˙” shit when it was them the whole time. the worst i did was “fuck her, he’s a cunt, fuck them”, but dream, you lied to me a Lot!

and you’re lying in defending yourself by saying i “heavily hate” sid or anyone. i never have, never did, never will. the last thing i said to sid in like July was “hey, heres my ooc tiktok, im deleting discord. if i never hear from you again, take care.” and then i left rp and the rpc entirely. haven’t talked to or even perceived any of you in months.

you want to believe i’m “bringing this up now” to start stuff or something, but what stakes do i have in any of this? you and yours drove me out of the hobby i’ve loved since i was 12, used an rpt blog to force me to defend myself against your ugly claims at a time you Knew well and good i was absent and dealing with a family death ( and then came in my dms to comfort me ??? you and k both. ) . i lost all of my best friends of several years. trust me, i want no part of the rpc anymore. i don’t want back in. i don’t want to engage. this is a nothing tumblr account that ill never use again. consider, instead, that another person close to the situation and i shared similar experiences and realized there were too many untruths and inconsistencies to let it rest, rather than just ‘starting stuff’ to start stuff.

“sid says steph crops screenshots to make them look incriminating” aye , but i definitely gave my entire discord login out, more than once, and encouraged my friend at the time to go ahead and look for themselves ( they declined at the time. i can still give the login i really do not care. though idk if the login will work anymore bc the accounts been deactivated for, uh, 6 months.) i cropped ss where earthp members were telling me how K is making them uncomfortable and how they were worried lenny was being dragged around by K, that i did do. and i STILL let k know that that’s what they were saying. i can’t stress enough ive got Nothing here that im fighting for i just think its ugly to lie for so long to everyone

“steph heavily hates sid” i do not. note the last thing i said to sid, up there ^. we did follow each other on tiktok then, and then we didn’t speak for 6 months. as of this morning, we are no longer tiktok mutuals - so it goes. sid never owed me anything. i don’t hate them. they know ( and yk what, so do my irl work managers!!! bc this shit affected my actual real mental health!!! ) that the day things went down, i left work early sobbing full blown emotional episode, writing paragraphs in desperation, to the point of overwhelming them and myself. i loved them dearly, called them my ‘spouse’ and best friend everyday, etc. though i don’t know now if they knew more about you than they let on. anyway……. please don’t just be declaring shit about me like it’s fact ?? i don’t hate anyone. not even you dream! just stop lyinggggg i hate that

ye all made me feel like i was crazy and losing myself in my own paranoia omg??? and ye were in your private chats afterward going “well deserved!!!” who even are you what did i do to you omgggg are we not in our late 20s with lives and careers ?????

if this is all bc of heddie/reddie and avengefm ? its ships dude it’s dolls it’s not real and to commit so much energy and emotion to lying to protect ur ships/rps is troubling at best. and if its not about heddie/reddie, then i haven’t a NOTION bc you and i, even when we were friendly w each other, were not close enough to create a bond to break??? i didnt do anything to you but welcome you into my writing spaces and engage in yours to the best of my ability. i was transparent with you when my activity struggled or i needed a break for mental health reasons… but what you had done with your friends is what ruined my mental health ?… go figure ….

i know who was behind that blog because they came clean and told me your connection to it as well. i know sel said nasty things about me too - we’re human and humans love talking shit. but no one else ever took it as far as you did, dream.

i don’t want anything from you! just stop lying on my name i don’t “heavily hate” anyone. outside of my shit talking from 6mos ago, i haven’t said a word against anyone but yourself; i’ve called you a liar, here in this post, because that is what i believe you are.

nobody in my entire life brings up what happened in everwell more than you and k. i owned up to every part i had ( whether directly or by my unavailability, all of it ), i deplatformed and cut out my two best friends ( people i had had in my HOME and had met IRL they were real people to me!!!!! ) and apologized personally to everyone affected, while picking out a funeral outfit and consoling my crying family. these are all my cards on table. you don’t have to respond either. just omg quit lying about me and the way i feel and what my intentions are - if a mf wants to know what im thinking and feeling, they can just Ask me.

and k i don’t want anything from you either! your names in this post because you were involved, and you know your involvement with that blog and how you also came to console me after. outside of that, i do not think of you and do not care what you think of me.

sid, i don’t want anything from u all either and i meant it when i said if i never hear from you again, take care bc i did care for u lots and also invited you into my home bc you were a real person to me. just know for a fact that anything dream says i’m saying about you or feeling toward you is just pulled out of thin air for whatever reason.

i always thought ye all were great writers!!! and so did snags and lex, way back when it was about writing for the love of writing. i would say all the time “omg dream is so funny” “omg k is cracking me up”, and they’d agree. hell if they’re at all in the rpc anymore and see this - hey guys! sorry shit got so ugly. you’ll never guess who was behind it.

i left the rpc and got mental help. i hope ye can get some help too.

* this is dream bringing sel into the Issues and tying her directly to k, btw. you keep saying you didn’t bring sel into the k stuff, but “they’re besties” “she and sel” “they want peach to drop eddie so sel can pick up eddie” this is where we’re getting that from, bc you keep saying you only referenced sel’s activity and didn’t connect her to k at all. i cropped out sids response. i can add it if need be but it’s just sid believing you.

this is where i’m pulling what im referencing in this post from. the second half is censored bc it doesn’t have to do with me.

this is me texting my irl work manager on the day sid and i last spoke. i was distraught and emotional and crying but ok yeah i “heavily hate” sid when the way everything went down broke me to bits OKAYYY

the censored names are the names of my irl managers like it was So Serious so don’t try putting words in my mouth about sid.

[lqfiles]

hiii thank u for your kind words :( yesterday i fell asleep hoping u would answer cause i really like reading ur responses so i fell asleep at like 2am and i have volleyball practice at 9AM on saturdays, so i was SO sleepy i put my alarm in the calculator 😐😐😐😐 not funny did not laugh, anyways R didn’t go to volleyball practice and hasn’t talked to J yet, she does speak to me so i guess me yelling at her didnf psis her off as much as i thought it would, M never texts in our gc 😒😒 but its okay we love her, A talks to me too, its just between J and R that things are kinda… tense.

aw thank u so much :( im sorry if i don’t know how to take compliments bc i dont personally think im cute, but hearing u say it so many times makes it easier for me to be confident about it 🫶🏻🫶🏻 so thanks! i do find you to be really cute (and VERY funny) too !!!

also 2 week long holiday??? THATS GREAT im really happy for you!! how are you doing w school? any test or projects you’re working on? i still don’t understand this whole college thing… is it something u do during junior and senior year? or after you graduate?

also jisung is my bf and all but chenji overrated asf imo… people will focus on popular ships and turn their head away from a duo like markmin… i personally really like jaemin and hyuck’s dynamic too but anyways o did vote for markmin !! at least lqfiles appreciates them 🙏🏻

ps why does everyone think yn and mark are having sex??? 🤔

- 🐣 anon again…

HELLOOO i’m so happy to see you’re active here omg i hope you’re studying tho, DONT SPEND TOO MUCH TIME ON HERE

i’m sorry if my response was late i normally only reply when it’s 11 pm here because i post at 12 😣 i also never knew you did volleyball WTFFF that’s so cool, i wish i was talented in a sport.. i mean i can skate well but that isn’t rlly a sport. IM HAPPY THAT IT DOESNT SEEM TO BE TOO BAD WITH YOUR FRUENDS tho i hope those other two will come around and stop making things so awkward 😭

LOLLL i’m sorry if me calling you cute bothers you btw it’s just that i always awe at your messages so i instinctively call you cute </3 i’m so you tho because i truly don’t know how to take compliments either, i always get shy, especially when it’s irl lmao but thabk you for thinking i’m cute and funny IM VERY HAPPY RN!!!!:D

school is almost finishing and i just submitted my last coursework for the school year so rn my class is just kinda doing anything! idk about other colleges but since i go to college in the UK we don’t do junior stuff and all, instead we have levels and (level 1,2,3) and here you can apply based on how good your grades are (if they were really good you can immediately start in level 3, if not you start lower) i’m currently doing level 3 year 1 (level 3 has two years over here) but i’m still figuring out if i wanna do this next year or just apply for an apprenticeship (basically getting education while also getting work experience)

CHENJI ARE CUTE BUT SO OVERRATED LIKE they barely interact and if they do it’s so little (imo) i’m more of a markmin girl because of the way mark treats jaemin, like jaemin is the same age as 00 so he treats them like friends but with mark he literally becomes a baby and it’s so cute i fucking love it IM SUCH A HUGE MARKMINIST YOU DONT GET IT, ITS MY BRAND, i should do a dream pair ranking tbh. THANO YOU FOR VOTING MARKMIN i think they lost regardless because they went against chenji (WHICH ISNT FAIR….) i love a bit of nahyuck too, not my fave pair but they’re funny tgt!!

I WISH I LJEW WHY EVERYONE THINKS SO guys pls if they were i would insinuate it more but laughing around and her asking to hang and her directly saying they only kiss.. COME ON…

[the-hydrangea-witch]

Time in the Other World

so we all know time is Not Real TM and that the whole sleeping for 8 hours thing is totally made up because circadian rhythms are all kinds of fucky ((idk fully what im talking about u get me)) and its even MORESO FUCKY in the Other World

Bit of Lore That is SO EXTREMELY IMPORTANT to every single other piece of info about the Other World: A couple centuries ago a Cataclysmic Event TM took place in the Other World resulting in the world basically ceasing its rotation entirely, meaning a day in the Other World is equal to a year, where each season is basically a time of day. The superstitious attribute this to the previous celestial trio Ewa, Ursa, and Altair the moon, sun, and star witches of the time, and say that the trio was CursedTM or something so they could never work together again "lest the Yonderworld fall down on us" so now during the summer only the sun is visible (day), during autumn only the sun and moon are visible (sunset), during winter only the moon and stars are visible (night), and during spring only the sun and stars are visible (sunrise).

Because of the lack of your typical 24-hour day, people's circadian rhythms are ALL fucked up to the point where there is never a time where most or all people are asleep, so like you'll never get to experience the whole "I'm the only person awake in my house at 4:00 AM" Lo-Fi playlist aesthetic. This also means really populated areas are generally less crowded on average, as half the population is asleep. This also means that, let's say you live in a pretty small town where you know literally everyone and have a really consistent sleep schedule, if one day you decide to stay awake during the time you and everyone else you know is usually asleep, you will find yourself in a COMPLETELY different environment full of total strangers despite technically being neighbors with them your entire life.

The Clock & Calendar: First of all, clocks are absolutely everywhere. They're one of, if not the most, important tools to the Other World. Every single building has a clock on it. Another important detail is that they aren't formatted like 12-hour clocks; they're 10. This doesn't mean days are 20 hours long, it means what this society uses as "days" are 10 hours long each, resulting in there being about 860 "days" in a year + 16 days for seasonal shifts ((i really wanted there to be 1000 but alas, i cant bring myself to make years different lengths between earth and the Other World since theyre supposed to be like. occupying the same space just in two different dimensions if that makes sense)). There is also more than one word for "day" with the way people speak, but due to how the Alltongue Spell works, it doesn't really translate for people from Earth, so the second word translates as "night" even though it is really just a way to differentiate between days where around half the population is awake or asleep. There are also a lot of outliers, where people's schedules don't line up with the days. A lot of older folks get Weird about this, but to pretty much everyone else it's seen as normal, and days are seen as a way of organization rather than strict schedules.

Seasons: Every season is 215 days (i think i did the math right) with 4 days marking the shift between seasons, meaning it's technically 219 days but the 4 extra days are not counted as part of the year. I still have to come up with some more concrete holidays, will get to that Eventually.

Because of how long the sun is out or gone for, a LOT of things in the Other World have adapted and changed ((both naturally and with human intervention)) drastically or simply died out, which includes a lot of people who died during and immediately after. The most immediately visible differences if you are a human entering the Other World for the first time are the plants, especially if you arrive during late Autumn or Winter. While trees on Earth drop their leaves once during autumn and grow them back for spring, Other World trees drop them twice. The "daytime" or spring/summer leaves are very thin and dark, and almost all plants radiate a lot of heat as well to compensate for the super intense sun exposure. Instead of just dropping their leaves all throughout autumn and remaining without them through winter, there is a sort of "fifth season" that overlaps between the end of summer and the beginning of autumn where the leaves drop and then for the rest of autumn and winter, new leaves grow back. The new leaves are a bit thicker but a lot less wide, taking a shape closer to pine needles, and are bioluminescent. The light each species of plant produces is actually not able to be used by other plants in the same species but is used by other plants and vice versa. Forests become extremely bright and colorful, and every plant helps each other survive in a very visible symbiotic relationship.

The tree cycles are one of the reasons why winter is often revered as a life-giving season, like how spring and summer are treated on Earth (at least where im from), while summer is seen as the season of death and rebirth like autumn and winter here.

Unfortunately, because the Other World is tilted on its axis like Earth is, it means the southern hemisphere is just in constant winter, so very few people live there (especially since yknow. a lot of people probably died during the first years post-apocalypse).

[letsgosisyphus]

Alright so boom Im back and Im turning my contribution to this space into a live journal of my experience with Retention and just life in general. I just kept going and God kept protecting me from wasting my life force. Paragraphs aren’t separated by topic really anymore, it just looks easier to digest than a wall of text.

I have been doing dummy missions and bringing my ex along to kill 2 birds with one stone and it almost killed me. I gotta stop trying to kill birds simultaneously and just focus on one at a time, unless it’s clear there is no negative benefit of killing them.

I will never mate with her again, Im jilting her(I know I could use that work better). She is like a planet. It’s already been too long I’ve been running in circles (ironically not orbiting but lemme cook) just spiraling out but it turned out I was spiraling up into a helix and then I reached escape velocity.

I no longer can exist on that vibration. I have been busy with studying for this mechatronics assessment and just trying to eat healthier things. I want to have these concepts understood enough to explain to a 5 year old or and old head. I wish there was an online community for people interested in mechatronics so I could learn and be around like minded people.

This girl who I’m kinda like impressed with gave me $40 dollars today and said she was a Christian and God told her to give this to me. She’s pretty cool and is into anime and sad music, she’s pretty introverted and idk I try not to bother her too much. I talk to everyone I work with but I just be telling her my whole life lmao. But as far as the money thing, I have to think of what to do about that, like I don’t know what I’d want most if I was in her shoes.

I’ve literally been in her shoes atleast somewhat when I’d give people an unexpected large amount of money, usually homeless people or people Id only see once. Her superego speaks to her perhaps but with religious support. I think we both feel like vessels for God. It’s an interesting situation meeting someone pretty similar to me and yet not exactly the same. Oh and she’s a writer.

I have to remember to raise my vibration and not ask for the attraction of specific person but of someone who is on the same vibration. It is no point in love potions be they physical or abstract. I will not settle for specifics, that would only build up energy unnecessarily. I am not hedging my bets on individual people, myself included. I require a team, we all have value and some are more suited for certain tasks and delegations than others.

I really desire clear skin and healthy hair. I have clear skin and healthy hair. My chakras are balanced. I am trusting of the process and I am patient. I study for 2 hours and then I take a 15 minute break, every other revolution I take a 30 minute break. On these breaks I eat and just focus on something else. Im basically using Amazons work structure for my own purposes.

I also want to get my official enneagram. People speculate Im a 6. It deals with so many different things and I just want the information so I can create a better world for everyone(myself included). I had some time where I freaked out thinking I was a narcissist but I’m not disagreeable enough to be that. My extroversion is limited to people I work with directly. I don’t particularly enjoy having to convince people of the truth that I am not flirting with them. In public I am not that social or rather I have not been in social situations where I felt it necessary or appropriate to give my name or any life details- aside from work.

I really need to write more, I still record stuff on my phone tho. I need to buy some recording equipment next week to work with a friend from a psychology group. Im really excited to create with another person and really create something special. I will do my best to not let myself or anyone down. I should read more of my adhd book as well to help with that.

Ok it’s nearing 5 o clock and I need to get sleep. Later slimes🙏💚

-Slime

[just-some-random-blogger]

meow meow, its muning and PLEASE tell me you received the first part?? bc just after they said that it's sent they said tumblr is broken TT i hope it really was sent.. so yeah it must be part 2. 'i literally opened genshin for this' ohh i feel honored. firSt of all, THE CAT TT omg what a cutie you have there. you remember ekaterina? well, my besties name is liza. just find it hilarious and kinda "mom i'm on tv!" hope youll make a stable relationship with lisa ghjdjdh. good for you. its so cute how you speak about xiangling. its great she made you feel this way. your brothers can just envy you enjoying your life and playing the way you want instead of just 'optimally' being nerds) jean seams to be gaslight gatekeep girlboss! i like it. hope you'll learn how to value her like she deserves TT 'THE CAT I STOOD THER' well the kittys laying now and its even more cute TT tbh it was the first thing i noticed... 'i have to keep adjusting the camera' oh so youre the cameraman now? youre doing great, sweetie. idk if i understand 'op' right but if i do then yelan slays. she's pretty. hope she'll do well if you plan to keep leveling her up. 'you cant talk to this cat' so cruel!!! sayu is basically my mood 24/7, i could've slept forever if i had an opportunity. i'm happy you feel so much about sayu, its cute. and hope youll get klee. and youll be the mother of two children... pls dont end up like viserys... AHJAJA amber TT poor girl. weak + weak = getting stronger so... idk good luck to both of you. good for musicians, in this house we love musicians. tbh i never heard of xinyan too but yor love is everything that matters. well morning is pretty! hope it didnt tire you up too much. i appreciate the efforts, though. thanks for showing me all of them!! she's Minimum viable product?.... anyway i'm glad you teamed up so well. she made her best so let zhongli work too. 'hell theme is fresh' i know about dante girl TT i really want to read it but i dont have time. but i know TT im not stupid. i meant like?? its a fictional concept that doesnt exist (or its not proven). hell is such a big thing to fantasise about. its fresh in a away its still not overused and hasnt been told everything about? i literally study literature like.. thoroughly... now i feel so stupid TT i just wanted to see more modern images of hell TT 'theres something about the idea of sending an ask that makes me anxious' its totally ok!! theres nothing really scary! ive been anxious to send asks too but probably being anon helped me a lot fhdhj. no is still an answer, if anything. we say 'they dont beat you for asking'. go and communicate with everyone you want to. 'im allergic to dust' GOD BLESS YOU and good luck. poor babe. 'the weather is cold' 1) i understood i cant slap people. literally. i have no experience so i have no knowledge. 2) what system do you use? like centigrade or fahrenheit? and what is cold for you... 3) its pretty warm now in where i live! its -18° C so im satisfied with the weather. 4) actually, not the whole russia is cold... its just me being from siberia. its +2° rn in the city where my besties from which is in the south. hope the movie'll be interesting at least. its ok. you can write whenever you want and whenever you're comfortable. since you've closed requests, just give you some time and enjoy some time off writing. (but let me know when youre willing to hear a concept about daemon feeling guilty and having to face the surprising reality). some emotions again! ive watched some videos with hotd cast and i'm so in love with Olivia TT shes not mommy, shes mother and i love her TT i love even the actors of rhaenys and corlys (sorry babes, my memory is bad). the girl who played young alicent is also soso cool. alicent's cast is really amazing. maybe i still think theyre not as similar as young and adult rhaenyras but their acting is good. do you have a fav hotd actor (beside daemon)? ok i think ill go end up my essay and go to bed. love you!! have a nice day/evening/night/life! good luck with the assignments! take care <з

yes i very much did get your first part HAHAAH muning

i kinda feel bad for the eternal pain of this perfectly looped gif

tumblr go bonk🤠 it cant handle your love for me

'i literally opened genshin for this' ohh i feel honored. firSt of all, THE CAT TT omg what a cutie you have there. you remember ekaterina? well, my besties name is liza. just find it hilarious and kinda "mom i'm on tv!" hope youll make a stable relationship with lisa ghjdjdh.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH STABLE RELATIONSHIP HAHAHHAHA. yeah i get what you feel every time i see another hannah im like OMG NO WAY but i hope they dont make a hannah character 😔👎 idk its weird someone else has my name HAHAHAH like that song by twenty one pilots 'down in the forest' LOLOLOL

good for you. its so cute how you speak about xiangling. its great she made you feel this way. your brothers can just envy you enjoying your life and playing the way you want instead of just 'optimally' being nerds)

HD:ASHDFAFDH:AHSF SO TRUE MY BROTHERS SUCK THE FUN OUT OF THE GAME SOMETIME though i understand why they tell me this because it is frustrating to play when you have no idea what ur doing and every since i tried out some of the stuff they said, i really did see results so HAHAHH

jean seams to be gaslight gatekeep girlboss! i like it. hope you'll learn how to value her like she deserves TT

T_T #justiceforjean

'THE CAT I STOOD THER' well the kittys laying now and its even more cute TT tbh it was the first thing i noticed...

i specifically posed there to show you the kitty!!!!

'i have to keep adjusting the camera' oh so youre the cameraman now? youre doing great, sweetie.

😡❌🍅 its the camera in the GAME 👎👎👎👎👎

idk if i understand 'op' right but if i do then yelan slays. she's pretty. hope she'll do well if you plan to keep leveling her up.

im so sorry i assumed you just knew HAHAHHA OP means over powered hHAHAHHAAHHA. yes yelan slays. i do plan to level her up.......... eventuallly

'you cant talk to this cat' so cruel!!!

there are some cats you can talk to

hold on let me open the game T_T

here !! his name is prince! you can 'talk to him

noelles so tiny T_T

lol nvm i changed to the main character and i cant talk to cat because my level is not high enough to challenge him HAHHHAH anyway lol thats it

sayu is basically my mood 24/7, i could've slept forever if i had an opportunity. i'm happy you feel so much about sayu, its cute. and hope youll get klee. and youll be the mother of two children... pls dont end up like viserys...

im luv sayu for real. AND PLSSSSSSSSSSSSSS NOT YOU COMPARING ME TO VISERYS T_T NAURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR i hope i get klee too! T_T i will love her forever even if shes weak HAHAAH

AHJAJA amber TT poor girl. weak + weak = getting stronger so... idk good luck to both of you.

AHHAHHAHHAAH WEAK + WEAK = GETTING STRONGER SLAYYYYYYYY <3 LOVE THAT MENTALITY

good for musicians, in this house we love musicians. tbh i never heard of xinyan too but yor love is everything that matters. well morning is pretty! hope it didnt tire you up too much. i appreciate the efforts, though. thanks for showing me all of them!!

<3 im luv u too <3 i wasnt tired but i was a lil relucant to share em because it might be oversharing now LOL but anyway i like showing you things <3

she's Minimum viable product?.... anyway i'm glad you teamed up so well. she made her best so let zhongli work too.

T_T noelle my love T_T shes not a minimum viable product T_T IDEK WHAT THAT MEANS ok i know what it means now i guess ??? maybe she was like that for me???? T_T but thats so sad to think T_T

'hell theme is fresh' i know about dante girl TT i really want to read it but i dont have time.

i aint ever reading that its too long T_T i hope you get to reading it since you seem to want to

but i know TT im not stupid. i meant like?? its a fictional concept that doesnt exist (or its not proven). hell is such a big thing to fantasise about. its fresh in a away its still not overused and hasnt been told everything about?

I SEE good point good point

i literally study literature like.. thoroughly... now i feel so stupid TT i just wanted to see more modern images of hell TT

T_T you wanna see modern hell T_T PLS i hope you only mean in the show

'theres something about the idea of sending an ask that makes me anxious' its totally ok!! theres nothing really scary! ive been anxious to send asks too but probably being anon helped me a lot fhdhj. no is still an answer, if anything. we say 'they dont beat you for asking'. go and communicate with everyone you want to.

SOOOOOO REALLL FOR THAT LOVE THAT FOR YOU AND ME i will try to be more.... or ok less anxious about sending asks!! 😤😤😤😤😤 ill try T_T HAAAH

'im allergic to dust' GOD BLESS YOU and good luck. poor babe.

T_T every time i clean a really dusty place my body is like is this a threat CLOG THE NOSTRILS then i cant breathe T_T

'the weather is cold' 1) i understood i cant slap people. literally. i have no experience so i have no knowledge. 2) what system do you use? like centigrade or fahrenheit? and what is cold for you... 3) its pretty warm now in where i live! its -18° C so im satisfied with the weather.

let me stop you right here AHAHHAHAHHHAHAHHAHHAHHAHHAHHHAHHAHHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHH ok #1 ok i get it BUT youre going to slap me when i answer number 3 #2 i use Celsius like you!! #3 T_T HAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHHAHAHAH its 28C here HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ i would die probably if i went to you. but ok to be fair i have an electric fan open and when its night it gets colder so HAHAHAHAHHAHH

4) actually, not the whole russia is cold... its just me being from siberia. its +2° rn in the city where my besties from which is in the south.

T_T cold is relative sure but russia is all cold to ME T_T

hope the movie'll be interesting at least.

me too T_T im going to watch it after this T_T

its ok. you can write whenever you want and whenever you're comfortable. since you've closed requests, just give you some time and enjoy some time off writing. (but let me know when youre willing to hear a concept about daemon feeling guilty and having to face the surprising reality). some emotions again!

<3 <3 youre so sweet <3 so much sweeter than normal <3 im taking credit T_T JK YOUVE ALWAYS BEEN SWEET IM LUV U SO MUCH i am glad you didnt say the daemon idea cos i might wanna write it A:LSHASLFHLASFHASL:HFAS HAHHAHAAHHAAH

ive watched some videos with hotd cast and i'm so in love with Olivia TT shes not mommy, shes mother and i love her TT

i mean shes both mommy and mother T_T im luv her so much

NAH BUT THIS SCENE WAS SO INTENSE BUT THEYRE BOTH SO HOT IN IT HKASHF:LHASFAS:F

i love even the actors of rhaenys and corlys (sorry babes, my memory is bad).

I LOVE THEM TOO IVE SEEN A FEW INTERVIEWS WITH THEM and they look like theyre having so much fun <3

the girl who played young alicent is also soso cool. alicent's cast is really amazing. maybe i still think theyre not as similar as young and adult rhaenyras but their acting is good.

I LOVE HER TOO i remember stumbling on ... young alicent actress T_T EMILY emily's tiktok and she was so ?????? SO COOL ???? WOW

do you have a fav hotd actor (beside daemon)? ok i think ill go end up my essay and go to bed.

ig i like tom glynn-carney (aegon) because ???? HES SO SWEET IRL WHICH WAS SHOCKING?? i mean he's so slimy as aegon SO ITS LIKE <3 <3 ??!!!! idk hES SO PUUPPPPY AND THATS WHY I MADE AEGON A PUPPY IN THE MODERN AU and yeah i like aemond's actor ewan mitchell too!!! he's a cutie pie as well AND ??? SO GOOD AT EVERYTHING????. I MEAN I ALSO LOVE EMMA theyre so HAS:FHSA <3 BUT I MEAN I ALSO LOVE OLIVA SHES so TAL:FHASL:FSA SOOOOOO <3 yes. HAHAHAHA

love you!! have a nice day/evening/night/life! good luck with the assignments! take care <з

i love you my baby <3 i hope youre doing well with your work and life and eveything. <3

xxx

[cupcraft]

Wasn't sure where to send this without it just being my closest friends, and I don't have any public social media so I'm going to put it here to just get it off my chest, feel free to delete this or not respond. But while following the whole Dream situation currently, the lengths some people have gone through to defend Dream and to weaponize traumatic experiences just to defend their favorite cc instead of accepting the most likely truth is so scary, and so so sickening. It's left me and some of my friends, all of us victims of grooming & CSA (including the dreaded r word), (albiet not Dream's victims, so I can't imagine how fucked up the victims themselves feel) shaking because of the whole precedent set of "believe all victims unless the abuser is someone we like/love and in that circumstance we'll pick apart everything and dissect your trauma infront of millions of people so we can call you a liar and an attention whore" ...

it's incredibly fucked up to see and while these people have chosen that stance of hyper-analysing solid proof for anything, even picking at the victim's reasonable emotional responses to such a situation, has left the "real victims of this genre of abuse" that they "defend" so violently terrified of speaking up, ever, even if it's not about Dream. I feel bad for the victims, if it was enough to make me and other victims who are removed from the situation scared and trembling, I can't imagine how bad it is for them. Not even mentioning how the legal justice system is so heavily skewered against SA victims that, even if it does go to court, the victims are more likely to be proven "wrong" and Dream will get off scot free.

Idk. Just wanted to get some brewing strong emotions out somewhere, feel free to delete or ignore this, I'd understand fully :) everyone please remember to do something unrelated to ccs that you love and find comforting, drink some water, eat some fruits and/or veggies, etc.

hey anon i did want to post and respond to this and just want to say thank you for sharing this with me that is not easy by any means and im so fucking sorry that happened to you and your friends. if this was not okay to respond to pls send me another anon and ill delete it. imma turn rbs off on this for now just to be safe.

thats why right now our rhetoric (not yours i mean the fandoms) is so fucking important. because the hyperfocus and analyzing Amanda and judging her emotional response because she doesnt fit what they think a victim of dream's should look like is abhorrent and it does shit like this, which is so traumitizing and awful for ppl like you and anyone else who has experiences with abuse/grooming/etc. I dont speak much about my own experiences and they are not the same by any means, but even i have been a bit triggered by this rhetoric bc of some things ive experienced in similar topics (i dont want to vent esp after you shared you experience so ill be vague).

I havent seen it on my dash but i have seen it on twitter and stuff especially. Be so careful how you talk about people who come forward about grooming/abuse/etc. Be careful how you scrutinize victims. because it has real fucking impact.

and as this lovely anon said please find comfort today and take care of yourselves srsly. even log off for a week if you need to. my heart is going out to everyone, especially amanda and any other victims.

Thanks again for this ask <3

[fandom-space-princess]

ooohhh would you mind sharing the reasons you don't like booktok? i have some reasons of my own but im really interested in the opinion who actually has to deal with the consequences of it all more directly. only if you want of course!

Oh goodness, grab your beach towel anon. Usually you'd have to go to the sea for this much salt.

(Prefacing this with the fact that this is just my opinion, not meant to be emblematic of like... booksellers as a whole, or my employer, or anything. It's also anecdata; nothing here is backed up by anything more than personal observation. I'm just a guy with a keyboard and an attitude. This also isn't meant to be a dig at anybody's taste in books/stories. I'm a supernatural blog, I have no legs to stand on in that regard.)

The things I most dislike about booktok, in no particular order:

1). The tendency toward quick consumption of stories without deeper or more lasting investment is an issue I have with a lot of media (see: Netflix dropping an entire series of something that everyone has watched, and then moved on from, in a week), but I think the problems inherent to that model of engagement become acute when the media in question is books. Novels are long-form storytelling by design; you're meant to sit with them for a while. Books in a series can take years, even decades, between publication. It's hard to convince people to engage with stories on that kind of timescale when we're constantly having our attention spans whittled away under a neverending barrage of buy-the-next-thing consumerism.

2). Tiktok is not only a principal motivator for this kind of behavior, it literally could not exist without it. Booktok doesn't encourage people to sit with books for a long time. It encourages you to *constantly* be consuming something new, *constantly* be pushing your friends to do the same, *constantly* be gaming the algorithm if you want to have any kind of significant presence. The environment does not encourage deep-dives; it leaves no time for contemplation. If you're participating in the culture as designed, you move through books very quickly.

From a business perspective (i.e. the capitalistic one), this is great. From the perspective of an indie bookseller, this is a pain in the ass on so many levels. Have you ever worked a retail Christmas rush? Where something you'd normally sell maybe three of in a year is suddenly The Hot Item, and the public demands you have 9000 of them in stock overnight?

It's unpleasant, is what I'm saying.

2b). The other thing this encourages? Stories that do not challenge people. Again, this is not to slander anyone's personal tastes. But ask yourself: what plays well to the greatest audience? What is most likely to draw customers, gain views, boost engagement? It isn't nuance. It isn't subtlety, isn't grappling with complex morality. All of those are things which I personally find intensely valuable about the experience of reading, and which I find pretty uniformly lacking in booktok's thing-of-the-week. This has an interesting overlap with the resurgence of censorship and purity culture that I think is worth examining, and maybe I'll rant about that some other time. As it stands, I find the trend toward Marvel-ification of fiction (simpler! louder! less nuance! more buzzwords!) to be obnoxious.

3). Speaking of buzzwords, the trend toward marketing new fiction using only a half-assed combination of tropes and comps drives me up a wall. I can't tell you how many ARCs I've seen in the last few months with bare-bones summaries and blurbs to the effect of "for fans of enemies-to-lovers and Game of Thrones, an endearing story of found family and the power of love!" Ok?? Fine in moderation, I guess, but even if I liked all of those things, what is in this book? Did the publisher not bother... asking the writer? Did they not leave them time to write a proper summary? Did they just not care, and hope replace a genuine marketing strategy with SEO?

Idk, maybe there's a benefit to this I can't see. Drives me absolutely bonkers, though.

4). The tags for my original post mentioned Colleen Hoover, who is the target of my ire at the moment because I've been pulling books for her fans all week, per point (2). No offense intended to Ms. Hoover, who I know nothing about but I'm sure is a perfectly normal author looking to get paid for her work, or even to her books, which are not my kind of thing but clearly are somebody's. FULL offense to Hachette for those books, though. They are everything I hate in paperback form: boring, ugly cover after boring, ugly cover. Really REALLY cheaply printed; about 1 in 3 arrive with some kind of damage, because they're so badly made that they don't hold up to even light jarring during shipping. The binding is... sad. Like. Even very bad books deserve better than this. But does the publisher care? Are they motivated to craft a higher quality product? Like hell they are! Because every booktok-er will buy them anyway. They're not interested in a product that will last; they're not looking for an object to cherish for life, a book to pick up and read over and over and over and over again until the spine cracks and the pages start falling out. That'll happen to these goddamn things by the second reread, but how many of them will get that reread is debatable, because by then I'll be selling that crowd The Next New Big Thing.

Anyway. I'll stop there. Thank you, anon, for your ask, and giving me a chance to vent a little bit. Wishing you a hot tea and a good, well-crafted story to liven up your day <3

[ravysu]

Sannin headcanons and thoughts

The last thing I would like to post for the sannin week. It is still 24.04 here! :D @sannin-central

This is long. Spoiler alert. Mostly Orochimaru, some Tsunade, a little of Jiraiya (because his story is pretty clear and spoken and idk what I can add). Also I recommend to read this meta about Orochimaru, it has influenced me a lot and has some good points. Sorry for any posible grammar mistakes. Also I really should put here a lot of references to the manga or anime but it was something that was piling up for a year and I'm soooooooo lazy. After all, those are just headcanons. Also: Im not excusing Oro's bad stuff here, Im trying to understand the reasons.

Ive already posted some hcs, here, here and here.

1. First if all, the chronology pic of sannin lifetime based on the info i found on naruto wiki and also some statements about wars from this post. It was tough considering what a mess naruto’s chronology is.

2. Sannin story shows what it cost to be a legend. They're like Team 7 but more realistic. Tsunade literally carried the war but left with nothing and developed a ptsd and have problems to just live on. Also anger control issues. I think she can be pretty bossy and stubborn which is not always nice. Jiraiya is the hero of the day but also very idealistic and can ignore some important details in the real word whether its the fight (he always injured during flashbacks maybe because each time he took too much to handle and on the one hand it's heroistic but on the other is a mistake that can lead your team to situations like in that Iwa cave) or your friends issues (I bet he saw what's going on but thought it's fine until Oro actually got red handed and left). He lives in his world and may have problems to get out to see it through someone else's shoes. As for Orochimaru, it seems like he was a normal guy for 20+ years (I mean, he didn't do crazy criminal shit and had something good in him and it was stated somewhere that it was his teammates influence. It is obvious they considered him as a friend, I don't thinks it was for nothing) but we mostly know his darkest side. Despite being a moster he is a human that have empathy and some ordinary human traits (man just decorates every bit of an environment he is in lol).

3. Tsunade was the leader of team Hiruzen.

4. Tsunade sometimes hit Jiraiya for some stupid things he did or said but never touches Orochimaru even if he did something same. Jiraiya complained about it once and almost got another hit.

5. Jiraiya had problematic parents that didn't care about him much and a lot of time he was wandering in the streets.

6. Judging by the look of Oro bangs and hair, he sometimes cut it off. A stress relief huh? And the fact that he doesn't do it now in Boruto..

7. It was shown that Tsunade and Orochimaru was acknowledged before they become a team. Maybe they did just before, or maybe some longer time before. I prefer the second option and hc that they met because both had no real friends - Orochimaru seemed weird and scary for everyone and Tsunade was Senju so everyone wanted to hang out with her but didn't really care. They weren't seen as what they were - people put the labels on them. But they didn't care about each other's labels and actually saw each other in true lights.

8. Tsunade knew it was an accident and it's not right but still she blamed Orochimaru for Nawaki's death for some time. It was something that seriously damaged their friendship and the team. Orochimaru was mad but also guilty, after all, he was responsible at least as a shinobi since Nawaki was under his watch. So he started to act cold and emotionless and was trying to distance himself from his teammates.

9. Jiraiya was in Ame while Dan died.

10. The whole his orphans mission was a bit irresponsible tbh. They already fought Hanzo and as he stated the conflict between Konoha and Ame is going to an end with Konoha's win. It's weird to stay here for three years in the middle of the war while there were other lands to fight. He left his teammates for some idea. Maybe that caused another crack in their team friendship.

11. If Tsunade would have find a way to live on with her trauma and follow the will of fire and stuff it would affect Orochimaru as well just as her grief affected him. It's like he would get an example that you can live on with this pain. So death isn't above human capability and we are not just the slaves of mortality (sounds stupid but i dont know how else to describe sorry). But as we know what he actually saw is that it broke her crucially to the point she couldnt be herself again. And so the death is above everything.

12. Oro wasn’t just acting as a cold pragmatic bitch in that cave but also tried to save Tsunade. Jiraiya knew it and that’s why he showed this sign to him like "I see what youre doing here" and that stunned Oro because he would prefer to look rather like a cold pragmatic bitch hehe

13. Just a thought. People in the village probably treated Oro as a foreigner or just wouldnt accept him because he looked so differently and had a weird attitude. That's why he sometimes didn't feel that Konoha is his home. After the wars where people were treated as means and tools, even the children, he himself developed this view on people - he dehumanized them and used as the means to his goals, just as his village did. Funny thing some people were straightly dehumanizing him too like Ibiki thought that he was a demon (tho he was a child). And he probably weren't the only one. Anyways the point is that it's logical that Orochimaru don't care about anybody but some few people, he's the product of his era. He's like Naruto that would chose the hatred way. But naruto had some good and understanding people around him and.. Orochimaru had them too, but match how Iruka treated Naruto and this Hiruzen's "I sAw tHe mAliCe in This cHiLd fRoM tHe BegGinNinG". And oro didn't even have a big ass evil fox in him. sry i hate hiruzen

ANYWAYS the moral of the story is not "go criminal if they hurt you" but always treat people like people. Waving my hand to Kant.

14. The reason why Orochimaru didn't pick some good morals to stick with through the hard times no matter what (like, idk, Jiraiya or Naruto) is because 1) I think he is/was pretty depending on people around him 2) the war fucked him and his friends up too much (Nawaki incident + Tsunade) 3) twisted addictions (though I don't think he's that sadistic, we never saw him torturing randoms just for fun, it was always some science experimental shit. He tends to get fun out of cruelty only when it's personal) that maybe developed as a way to sublimate anger and sadness caused by his parents loss (that's what they share with sasuke - unlicke naruto, they knew their parents and it's other kind of pain. Sasuke developed a revenge issue and Orochimaru - cruelty pleasure which... is kinda the same but less epic and more occasional lol).

15. Speaking of that, Orochimaru cared for Sasuke because he saw himself in him.

16. Oro hold grudges against Hiruzen for not choosing him to be Hokage not only because he was ambitious and/or egoistic, but also because Hiruzen was some kind of a father figure for him and his approval was important tho i doubt he was aware of that. He also probably could tell that Hiruzen was suspicios about him when he was a child and that led to many conflicts and was hurting as well.

17. Tsunade knew things weren't pretty with Orochimaru after the wars but she never expected them to be this bad. During the week that she was given in her arc she thought not only about how much she wants to see Nawaki and Dan again despite how wrong would it be but also was trying to bury all the good memories she had left of Orochimaru so it would be easier to kill him.

18. She poisoned Jiraiya exactly because she knew he would not let her do it. Jiraiya was always hesitant to kill and inclined to forgiveness, while Tsunade, as mentioned by Orochimaru, could be merciless (so much so that he was not surprised when Kabuto suggested that she wanted to use Jira for Edo Tensei).

19. That was one of her traits that scared Jiraiya and fascinated Orochimaru.

20. Remember how Oro grabbed Jiraiya's neck when the latter was trying to cover with hair jutsu? On the snake, in Tsnade's arc. Orochimaru could have easily kill Jiraiya by pulling the sword out of the mouth (arteries are right there) but he didn't. As well as he could kill Tsunade when she was still shaking - just aim for the neck or the heart. Instead, he just injured her lung and kicked her which is not a big deal for the kind of shinoby like her at all.. Also he helped Anko not accidentally kill herself but it would be way much profitable to let her do it. "Orochimaru has no feelings".

21. The reason he suddenly wanted to kill Tsunade instead of forcing her to heal his arms as it was planned (which is weird since it will not going to get him heals and he kinda said that he wouldn't want to kill her just minutes ago) is that not only she refused to help him (he thought he could work it out) but she also prefered the village over him (from his point of view). Out if everyone she was the closest to being able to understand him since the village caused her painful losses too but nevertheless she agreed to be on it's side.

22. He wasn't fighting her back in the end partly because he thought he deserved that. Somewhere deep inside hahah.

23. Tsunade got a fear to develop deep bonds so they probably weren't very close with Shizune (also the way she knocked her down in this hotel.. oh).

24. Orochimaru will be here when she'll die.

25. Orochimaru's eng dub to Tsunade: "I often wondered what it would be like to ring that pretty neck yours". No comments.

26. Orochimaru is either bi/pan or ace. Anything or nothing lmao

27. Hiruzen knew about at least some of the Oro’s illegal experiments and was okay just as he was okay with the Foundation all the time. Because it’s useful. Then he has discovered he went too far OR he knew everything and oro just became too inconvenient because of his methods. The way Orochimaru tells Sasuke about reasons they are well treated as the criminals is based on in his experience with Hiruzen.

28. As you may know the lyrics in Orochimaru’s music theme goes “don’t talk with the silence of the heart”. It was taken from one Indian song that also had lines like “don’t question life too much”, ”pain arose somewhere in the chest”, “don’t speak to the wounds of the heart”. Though I’m not sure 100% because I was translating it with some hindi dictionary with like zero knowledge of hindi

29. I like to think that this “silence of the heart” theme and the fact that he called his village a hidden sound village are somehow connected. The hidden sound is the possible explanation of all things waiting to be listened to but the truth is silent and you know it deep in your heart and it bothers you. The world is silent just like the life is meaningless but people can only hear. *Sigh* anyways

30. Orochimaru’s journey is the one about accepting death. When he saw Karin released her chains while was trying to get to Sasuke he understood that the death is a part of human’s strength.

Can’t wait to feel that everything I wrote is wrong or not enough or stupid and obvious lol. Anyways, it’s something that I wanted to share until I move to some other fandom.