#actuallyADHD

[thatadhdmood]

an eloquent take down of the "people are self diagnosing autism to be trendy and for attention" take that morons have been echoing on tiktok

[video description is the reblogs, its very long]

[titleknown]

REBLOG IF YOU'RE EXTREMELY BURNT OUT DESPITE ALSO FEELING LIKE YOU'VE DONE NOTHING WORTHWHILE AT ALL WITH YOUR LIFE!

[butchwheels]

i think more neurodivergent people should practice saying "hey please only say yes to me infodumping to you about my favorite things when you have the emotional capacity for it, don't force yourself to or it defeats the purpose and if you hide it you'll grow resentment unnecessarily and if i ever find out i'll feel incredibly betrayed" to loved ones, even if they also are autistic/adhd/etc. it is an important boundary that is in OUR control and would radically change our sense of trust with others. we can be authentic AND build trust if we communicate effectively with other people

this can also apply to passionate ppl in general, and to their loved ones who think that making a martyr of themself so their loved one can ramble to them beyond what's comfortable makes them a better partner. it actually often does not. the only way we can learn to trust that you actually want to listen to us when we ask is when you say no sometimes too. otherwise we'll go into a guilt loop everytime, bc we don't have the data to prove that you would tell us if it was too much. i think even without neurodivergency being involved ppl are likely to martyrize themselves for their loved ones not realizing that being a martyr AT ALL will ALWAYS backfire at your loved ones. it never just affects you, and it always impedes genuine connection and trust. even i have been guilty of letting my autistic friends ramble at me until i was exhausted, and then straining beyond that bc it felt too rude to tell them, even when it was negatively affecting our emotional connection on my end. but communication is key, folks. it's a hard habit to learn but one we all must learn, and both sides need to do it

[dissociacrip]

i saw that one disability-related post a while ago about dental care but i can't find it again so i'm gonna mention a few things as a (mild to moderately) mentally & physically disabled person, whose teeth hurt when i eat sweet stuff now + i've had a root canal due to a fall + i'm learning to take care of myself, that may or may not help other folks with their dental routine

note: i am not a dentist & this info is mostly what i've gleaned secondhand from dentists, so yeah, i am not an expert in any capacity

water flossers aren't as effective as regular flossing (doing both is actually what's most effective) but they're better than nothing & helpful in cases where coordination problems or other issues might prevent regular flossing technique (i imagine this also depends on the quality of the water flosser)

if you use one of the plastic pre-made floss picks things, rinse the string off in-between each time you use it to floss one side of a tooth, it's tedious but it mimics moving to a new (clean) part of the thread like you do with regular floss

if you get an automatic toothbrush, get one that does circular rotation rather than just vibrating or whatever, as this mimics the tools they use in a dentist's office + imitates the circular motion you're expected to make with a standard toothbrush (which is also hard with coordination issues), i got one that does this pretty cheap from walmart (it's an oral-b but i forgot the specific type) + it automatically times it for you

if you have white spots on your teeth that are uneven with the shade of the rest of the tooth those are potentially white spot lesions due to demineralization; whitening products can make this worse rather than help it, but some products can help with remineralization such as mi paste topical tooth creme, which contains calcium and phosphate (i have yet to try this myself but it seems to get suggested by a lot of dentists, orthodontists, etc. for white spots on teeth & it's also supposed to help with sensitivity and tooth health in general because the white spots are lesions so it's not purely cosmetic!)

it's advised to not rinse your mouth immediately after brushing as this potentially dilutes & reduces the effects of the flouride (if you use fluoride toothpaste), stuff says to wait at least 15 minutes or so

just giving your teeth a quick scrub (even if it's without toothpaste and just water) is better than not brushing your teeth at all

if you have trouble seeing a dentist for financial reasons, try to see if there are income-based or charity dental services in your area, sometimes dental schools also provide low-cost/free dental care

that's all i can think of for now, i wish i had more advice for people who struggle to be able to brush their teeth at all in general but this is all i got unfortunately :(

additionally - you're not bad, useless, gross, or a failure if you struggle to (or can't) maintain oral hygiene; this stuff is much easier for some people than it is to others & those who take it for granted like to forget that, no one deserves to be mocked or looked down on for being disabled & struggling to/not being able to do """basic""" stuff like this!

[zebracakesarecopingmechanisms]

ok so we know about the need to infodump, but what about the opposite? The need to absorb more information about your special interest like a sponge, but you literally can’t find any new material because you’ve already consumed every fact about it

[redysetdare]

I don't think a lot of people realize that lot of their advice to disabled people often boils down to "Get over it." they are trying to be helpful but their idea of helpful is "Just do the thing" because that's what they do. for them they just do things. It comes naturally to just do it.

They don't know how to bridge the gap between you and the task. For them the bridge is already pre-built and stable. For disabled people the bridge is run down, not well kept, it feels unsteady and is hard to get across without being slow and cautious - hell for some people there is no bridge and we need to build it ourselves but we don't have the bridge building tools and no one gives them to us.

"Just cross the bridge." They say before walking over their pre-built bridge. They never gave you the tools to build a bridge to cross.

[thatadhdfeel]

i know people like to dunk on it but personally i do i find that the whole “take a deep breath” thing can actually be very useful.

reconnecting with your body when you’re overwhelmed is very important (especially if you’re someone who has PTSD — from experience, it helps bring me back to the present.)

take deep breaths for one minute. tap on your leg for a bit and concentrate on the sensation. if you’re physically able to, get up and stretch. this isn’t me saying it’ll work wonders for everyone — but it has a lot of potential to be helpful, if it’s something you have the capacity to do

[nemo-me-impune]

My life

[adhdpie]

Something I desperately want ppl to know:

LONG COVID CAN LOOK INDISTINGUISHABLE FROM ADULT ADHD

If you are an adult who has never experienced ADHD symptoms until recently: you may have a form of Long COVID

many ppl who have it call ‘brain fog’. Its primary feature is being unable to concentrate & short term memory/working memory issues, which severely impairs executive function.

COVID-induced brain fog’s effect on executive function is essentially indistinguishable from ADHD’s effect on the same.

& brain fog is A VERY COMMON LONG COVID SYMPTOM

as the number of adults with executive dysfunction has shot up, i want people to remember this. Especially if they get an ADHD evaluation and are told they’re not ADHD

Because we are all disabled, and we deserve care and understanding no matter what disabled us

[thatadhdmood]

@nutmegan17 on tiktoks eating tray hack

By keeping a tray full of no prepare necessary food, in the fridge it can be used to aid neurodivergent or fatigued people.

By putting food like, cheese and crackers, or whatever is a safe food for you personally on the tray, it can be taken easily to the couch or bed to be eaten from whenever you are hungry.

This prevents executive dysfunction or fatigue and any reason preventing you from eating. You need to care of yourself because everyone needs food to stay alive including you.

You deserve to eat even when on a bad brain day and are unable to prepare a meal for yourself.

If not having a full meal doesn't satisfy you, a snack may even give you the energy to make a full meal afterwards!

[mikajunie]

rediscovering shame and giving yourself compassion (how to deal with shame as someone with ADHD)

this is directed towards my fellow ADHDers who have trouble with reoccuring shame while leads to hindered productivity.

signs that your productivity is hindered by shame (compiled by my own experiences):

you feel negative physical symptoms when you think about your responsibilities

you find ways to avoid the responsibilities

every time you make progress, you feel like you don't ever wanna touch it again

when you present your progress, you feel ashamed of yourself because it's not finished (on time & according to ur standards).

you feel like you are a constant failure. you never win, despite achieving good things here and there.

you are a walking ball of anxiety

you have a fear of being perceived

there's probably more, but eh those are just from my own experiences

below i will write down what y'all should remember, what you can do to help yourself, etc. this is compiled from dr k, my own journaling time, and my firsthand experience from having shame 24/7

some things u gotta remember

shame is what exists in the gap between your ideal self and where you are currently.

your ideal self doesn't have to be unrealistic, it can be yourself when you were at your peak or someone who is very similar to you.

shame brings negative thoughts, because it makes you see progress as a negative thing.

instead of being happy that u made progress, u grumble to urself and ask "why didnt i just do it sooner? im so stupid". it's a reminder of your failures, so u avoid progress altogether.

shame can become a part of you, to the point where you feel uneasy or vulnerable if you dont feel ashamed at yourself

shame doesn't do anything to ADHDers in the long run except self-loathing and hindered productivity.

what should u do?

basically self-therapy, but instead of stopping at why, i try to solve my shame one-by-one.

examine past moments where you felt a LOT of shame. this can go back to elementary. the stronger the emotions, the better. now, write them down. you're probably cringing, but that is good. feel all the cringiness running through ur veins.

why did you feel shame? why did it happen? what did you feel?

reframe your thoughts. instead of immediately running away from it, accept it and justify it. give it compassion. give it a hug. was it your 7 year old self? hug yourself. it's okay to fuck up and do silly things sometimes, and it's okay to have ADHD. it's not our fault.

remember that ADHD is a lifelong nerudivergency, you can't just push it away. coping mechanisms and tools help, but give yourself some grace when you screw up. it's our first time living anyway.

calm your body down. make sure your physical body is doing okay.

now... think of one thing you want to do but can't because of shame and do these steps carefully. think of the reasons why you might be ashamed, and reframe your thoughts.

WARNING!! TAKE IT ONE PRESENT ACTION AT A TIME. don't do this for every action you want to take, let your body slowly learn that it's okay to make progress despite the shame you feel, and you are allowed to feel compassion for yourself.

train your body to accept compassion slowly. life is tough with ADHD but it's even tougher knowing that shame will get in your way. give yourself a break, it's fine to fuck up, we all go through different things anyway. even if it's not fine, you will learn and make those mistakes a lil bit lesser in the future.

ok hope this helps.

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

Not strictly ED related but here's a tip for other autistic/ADHD folks out there: if you're stuck doomscrolling and struggling to break the pattern of scrolling sites when you're not having fun, if you're relatively ablebodied, get up and pace.

But like, not with the specific pressure to get up and do something productive. Not even with the pressure to get up and do something fun! Because often when you're doomscrolling you're stuck in an executive dysfunction trap and Cannot Do That. Just get up and like...pace around for a while.

It'll help break the screen feedback loop while also helping your body get activated and sort of simulate a burst of "productivity momentum" that can help get you moving, or at least it has worked wonders for me. Seriously IMO pacing is THE Mental Health Pasttime(tm).

[positivelyadhd]

Friendly reminder that you do not have to buy loads of new planners/journals or try new productivity systems in the new year.

You do not have to try and reinvent yourself overnight.

Change and growth happens slowly, and you are allowed to take your time with it.

[itingtmywly]

as a neurodivergent teen, adults does it ever get better?

[thatadhdfeel]

“if you only applied yoursel-“ i am going to apply a fist to your face