#a confused wreck

[daemon-in-my-head]

Genuinely confused as to why people follow me. Why? Has someone threatened you to do it? Lemme know and I'll hit em. I'm not contributing anything to society over here. I'm literally just talking shit about 2-3 men I made up and occasionally the drow woman and her ex.

My version of Gortash or Durgetash is straight up just pain. A lot of pain. And even more pain. I'm not even horny posting as evidently displayed by that one fic of mine that literally just blueballs people repeatedly.

I haven't written anything good in over a month (sorry bout that btw) and the art I do post is occasionally and not that good to warrant anything.

The asks? But they're new (fyi new version tmr, got nearly all questions transferred now and split it into ten parts, albeit they are anything but balanced)

I'm confused and genuinely idk what people expect of me. I also don't remember if I've asked b4 cuz atp I have over 250 drafts. I'm scared of opening that tab so I just keep creating new ones. Help lol

[monkesupreme]

dense, neutron star of a man. His weight fluctuates based off of the amount of sun hes been exposed to, and the amount of water ingested, so a very healthy kryptonian easily weighs around 350-400 lbs/ 158-181 kgs. Martha quickly traded in her lawn chairs for sturdy, solid wood, rocking chairs for the front porch as he got older, but Clark seems to be drawn to the flimsy lawn chairs like a moth to a flame.

(Hes prone to shouting for his Ma or Pa when hes scared awake, old habit hes never broke out of lol)

Bonus: a regular day for Bruce

[suntails]

new plushie just dropped

[inkyrainstorms]

based on the Billstill au by @jellynut! You guys should totally go check it out, it's so cool and angsty and somehow my monkey brain took that idea and made it Stan tormenting Bill forevermore. (This has spiraled rapidly not its own au of an au based on an earlier idea I had once) (might draw more of this au and that one who knows)

This has been going on for at least 15 hours straight, and Stan is having the time of his goddamn life watching Bill suffer

And then Bill gave Stan horrendous night terrors

And then Stan bought a giant bag of nachos and ground them up into crumbs and dumped them in the sea or some shit

Transcript and full image under cut

Bill, floating intangibly: You're a loser, Mac

Stan, looking up from his magazine: Yeah? And you're an interdimensional demon dumb enough to die in my head. You're the biggest idiot I know, and I know me

[disheveledtranquility]

This scene will forever haunt me.

[baddecisionsgoooo0]

Transformers X Haso

I need more transformers x Humans are space orcs.

I need these smol, delicate humans the autobots have to protect to pull out Molotov cocktails and destroy decipticon joints.

I need a teacher to mix up a swimming pool size batch of oobleck and trap a cybertronian in it to protect his students.

I need humans using acid, or throwing rocks in joints, or otherwise inconveniencing decepticons while the autobots get more and more concerned.

I need Optimus or Ratchet to morosely bring up something that happened in the war, and a human to be like, "Oh that. Yeah, we made that illegal, it wasn't considered sporting." or "Wait, you guys have been fighting for how long, and that's the most extreme thing you did?"

I need a bot or a con to get curious and open a history book, and the next morning be traumatized by the shit humanity has done.

I need Humans that get tired of the whole, "Humanity is smol and fragile" shtick, and decide to go kill decipticons so they stop attacking the autobots.

I need Optimus to slowly realize we are not cute, fluffy little creatures, but agents of chaos and destruction. Beings who will destroy anyone and anything that threatens our family, and we consider the bots family.

[nymphapunkcake]

Excuse me but...

[southernspooks]

bonus doodle

[simpingforcys]

NEW KING CANDY LORCANA CARDS

HE LOOKS SO GOOD

[kachowcarbutasahuman]

every now and then i remember about the häkkinen/schumacher rainbow cover for the 36th issue of autosprint that came out in the 2000 and i'm like "what the hell, why not"

also the title is a reference to the movie "Trading Places" (in italian they changed the name to "Una poltrona per due" ["An armchair for two"]).

[morally-incorrect-turbotastic]

GUESS WHO SAID YES?~

[fried-manto]

I'll hand it to you.

[mangyraccooon]

I’ve seen the fandom take a bastard character and make them a poor little meow meow, twice now

Which isn’t a lot but it’s fucking disappointing.

[random-dragon-exe]

OK so a super minor thing that bugs me about Wreck it Ralph is that apparently the Nicelanders are capable of lifting Ralph up.

You know the same Ralph who's 643 pounds.

Let that sink in, 643 lbs!

The same weight that Turbo/King Candy could carry with ease and toss around like a rag doll when turned into a cybug.

A cybug that's massive from his 9 feet tall stature.

Which is also the same amount of sheer weight that's supposed to have been the key to destroying the Diet Cola Mountain to get it to erupt.

No offense to these little guys, but HOW!?

They're supposed to be the ones that need protection from him in the form of Fix if Felix. If anything, they should be getting absolutely squished underneath him.

I get it, it's such a minor detail to get hung up on, but I'm still perplexed by this.

Like is it a superhuman strength that kicks in at the end when he's beaten? Do they secretly take steroids or something? A power up?

What the heck is going on here?

Again I know this is super minor, but still, I am confused, as it's not explained.

[ask-turbotime-seasons]

Look, @aninonimosstuff-blog [whiteboard host], he's helping. uwu Snow should for sure help the severe concussion, yes yes.

I would tag silly green bug too just for being there but idk who that is, rip.

[artemismoorea03]

DP x DC Prompt: Not As I Appear

(Can also work for Marvel if that's what you wanna go with :3)

Danny is not a Meta because that would mean he had a MetaGene, he's not an Alien because he was technically born on this planet. However he died and was reborn between this realm and another so he was technically a Cross-Dimensional Being. But of course he couldn't just say that. The Anti-Ecto Law's were still heavily in place with "science" backing it up and a mixture of an Amity Park blackout caused by the Ghost Investigation Ward (GIW) and the ectoplasmic energy naturally produced by the area - it was hard to protest the science already available. So he couldn't say he was Phantom or protest the science so he found himself in a pretty tough spot when he couldn't explain the 'strange readings' to a group of Meta-Human Traffickers when they kidnapped him from Amity Park.

He also couldn't explain to the group that came to save him and the other hostages when they found him single-handedly putting an end to the trafficking ring on his own. Instead he could just look at the person in front of him with an unsteady smile as he said.

"I promise it's not what it looks like, but if I told you the truth things will get even more complicated."