#a book that could have aborted tbh

[curieincali]

Me reading ACOTAR/MAF/WAR: This is great, sure there are some problematic elements, but it doesn't meet my problem-threshold while I'm thriving in fairy smut silliness :)

ACOSF: I need to fight the author in a parking lot. x

[ioaezz]

i would like to make a request, aib characters reacting to s/o pregnant? I love your account<3

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ YOUNG LUV aib characters getting their s/o pregnant (headcannons!)

note: thank youu!!

morizono aguni —

- this man would be flabbergasted

- is definitely frozen for a few minutes

- wouldn’t know what to do

- after he calmed down he realised that he wanted to keep the baby

- but he won’t pressure you into it

- would be really happy and anxious if you decide to keep it

- now you’re officially on lockdown

- he only lets you leave for games and he has to accompany you

- otherwise he’ll go crazy

- doesn’t let niragi be in the same room as you

- he’d read books about pregnancy to help you

- when you’re in your shared bed he’ll place his hands on your stomach

- he’ll protect you at all costs

ryohei arisu —

- would be so shocked

- arisu isn’t ready to be a father yet but if you want to keep the baby he’ll try as much as he can

- he’ll also respect your choice if you’d chose to abort it

- he’s gonna be a lot clingier than before

- also very worried and protective

- he’s already thinking about names even though you’ve only been pregnant for a while

- he’s considering naming the child karube or chota if it’s a boy

- he’s very nervous but also very excited

- during games he’ll be constantly looking for you to make sure you’re alright

- he’ll wrap his arm around your waist more often

- when you’re in bed he’d kiss your stomach softly

- makes sure you avoid niragi and the militants at all costs

shuntaro chishiya —

- he was very surprised when you told him that you were pregnant but he doesn’t show it

- chishiya is pretty sure that he’d be a horrible dad but he hides it from you

- reassured you that everything will turn out okay while he’s going through an internal crisis

- he won’t tell anyone that you’re pregnant except for kuina

- he’s a doctor so he knows what’s good and bad for you during pregnancy so he’ll make sure to follow it strictly

- he’d try to fasten the process of his plan so you could leave the Beach

- he’ll make sure that there’s nothing around you that might cause you unnecessarily stress

- sometimes he’ll stare at your stomach with fascinated eyes

- he’s trying to do everything to get you to deliver in the normal world

suguru niragi —

- he thinks you’re lying at first

- then he thinks you’re cheating on him

- after he went through all the emotions that there are he will calm down slightly

- will awkwardly try to assure you

- isn’t too sure in becoming a dad tbh

- at first he’d hope that you would get rid off it

- when that didn’t happen he’d kinda avoid you

- but he won’t let you go to the games ever alone anymore

- after a few days he’ll be everywhere where you are

- he has absolutely no idea how to help you

- he’ll be a lot more possessive than usually

takatora samura —

- his brain stopped functioning the moment the words left your mouth

- he kinda wants to abort it but later on he’ll warm up to the thought of becoming a dad

- when he’s around you he’ll make sure to sheath his sword so he won’t accidentally hurt you

- during games he’ll be walking around you in a circle to make sure nothing happens to you

- he’ll hold your hair while you’re emptying your stomach in the morning

- makes sure you eat and drink enough

- he’s almost 100% sure that he’ll be a shitty, cold dad so that’s something that you’ll have to talk about

- while you’re cuddling, he’ll give you all kinds of name suggestions but he wants you to ultimately chose the name

©cupidsheqrt , 2023.

[blackpilljesus]

Can we not just stop birthing men like... women have to stop giving life to men.

I'm doing my part ✌️ and I agree but collectively most women wouldn't. I remember when there was discourse over a radfem having & celebrating giving birth to a baby boy. I've seen radfems praise lesbian couples adopting baby boys.

Tbh a lot of women are sellouts, they sellout other women & even betray themselves for love or having a slightly higher social status in society. When forced to cohabit with predators that have more power & essentially want to reproduce a copy of themselves, women giving them that could elevate or secure their status in society - it's an incentive & many would go for it.

Another thing to consider is that many women birth maIes to spare their lives, there's been cases where maIes would kill their partners & daughters for the woman not having a son (even though the sperm determines the sex). Part of me considers maternal instincts of women not being able to kill their maIe offspring bc that's still their child but then I think of post partum psychosis & cultures where daughters are routinely killed when they're born. If these instincts applied to maIe & female children I dont think things would've gotten this bad. Also a lot of women treat their sons much better than their daughters.

In a patriarchial society, birthing sons lets boymoms live out their power fantasies through their sons. They 'borrow' power from their sons or use their sons as a proxy for power. Like toxic mother in-laws treating their daughter in-laws like shit bc it's through the association that this woman is married to their son, women that cover up their sons sex crimes, in some cultures; boymoms look for women who've undergone FGM for their sons.

Bear in mind so many women still have faith in maIes as a collective, they think they'll raise the "good ones". This notion is popular in feminist spaces, women think they'll magically train & raise maIe allies. There's a saying of how several boymoms have emotional incest with their sons, they see there aren't good maIes in society so they want to create their own one(s).

However I think the biggest issue is that women are never going to be sociopathic or apathetic enough to moids. It would take a high level of apathy to abort maIe fetuses & refuse to birth another xy solely on the basis of their sex, to get to this point you'd need to have this feeling towards maIes generally and most women dont have this. MaIe survival is contentigent on female subjugation, women dont need to subjugate maIes to survive, we carry life, we can also provide for ourselves & maIes know it which is why they've set up societies the way they are and they're brutal about it because they and their bloodlines would be dead anyways if they dont have a system forcing women to rely on them to survive. That said; In the end despite everything, many women still want to partner with maIes, many women still love & believe in maIes. Most women wont disassociate with maIes collectively, catherine mckinnon goes into this in her book "the second sex" where she speaks about how women are scattered everywhere & identify with the tribes maIes put them into as opposed to seeing themselves as a sovereign group.

I personally dont think birthing another oppressor is worth it but people are different. Of course this can (& does) backfire against women but by the time the damage is realised it's too late. Ultimately for a shift in gender ratio & for women to refuse to birth maIes at any cost, they need to think bigger than themselves individually. Think of womankind instead of maIe supremacy & its structures but this will never happen & I wont kid myself otherwise.

[thebeesareback]

Fuck it, let's talk about Littlefinger

(the ASOIAF character, not just fingers in general. Also, I've said "Brandon Stark" for Ned's brother, and "Bran Stark" for Ned's son)

Trigger warning: rape and forced abortion

So one of the things I've said before is that I love ASOIAF for many reasons, including the complexities and backstories of all the characters. I suppose that's why there's a bazillion characters and the books are so long.

Anyway, one interesting example of narrative framing is the perspective we get on Littlefinger. He's (arguably) the main antagonist in the first book and is responsible for everything from Jon Arryn and Ned's death to the Tyrell marriage to Joffrey's assassination. We see him as a scheming villain, determined to harm our saintly Starks.

Littlefinger was born as a second-generation immigrant and heir to a minor lordship. Thanks to his parents' relationship with fuckhead Hoster Tully, he got to foster at Riverrun, where he befriended Cat, Lysa and Edmure. The books are interested in the "outsider" perspective on power status, hence Jon Snow's POV, and arguably Theon and Arya, too. They live in the home, they're part of the family... kinda. Sansa always thinks of Jon as her "bastard half-brother", Theon knows that Ned might have to kill him, and Arya doesn't fit neatly into her assigned gender role. They see Rob and Sansa and want that, kind of, but know they'll never get it.

Therefore, in his youth, Littlefinger knew that he was smart, knew that he wanted power, yet was keenly aware that it was almost impossible for him to socially climb. He does -- we'll get to that in a bit -- but as a child, he knows it's unlikely. Think of Rob and Jon playing in Winterfell and Jon yelling "I'm the Lord of Winterfell" and Rob just returning "no, my mother says you won't be". It's a horrible situation to be in. We don't get Littlefinger's POV, but if we did, I think there's a good chance he would remember a similar scenario.

Then there's Littlefinger's relationship to Catlyn and Lysa. Little boys often have crushes on little girls, and it's usually pretty sweet and can sometimes become a nice romance or just fade away. We hear that Catlyn is intelligent and beautiful as an adult, so it's easy to see the appeal, and Catlyn also has status through her Tully blood and an understanding of Machiavellian power plays because her father raised her as his heir until Edmure was born. One could easily see Littlefinger's desire for Catlyn being a desire for power and status, as well as her own merits.

Lysa had a crush on Littlefinger, creating the incesty love triangle that GRRM loves so much. I can't imagine playing kissing games with a foster brother and a sister, tbh. Littlefinger himself seems to only see Lysa as a pawn, and uses her feelings to get her to do what she wants. The narrative suggests that, for a time, there's Catlyn, mourning her mother; Lysa, mourning her mother and interested in a boy who doesn't really care about her; Edmure, just being a baby; and Littlefinger, caught up in rules and restrictions: allowed to be close to what he wants, but never truly part of the team.

Events start to occur. Fuckhead Hoster Tully decides to set up marriage alliances for Catlyn and Lysa. Lysa meets Jamie Lannister, who barely pays her any attention (he's distracted by the presence of his hero, Brynden "Blackfish" Tully). Catlyn meets Brandon Stark, who has power, status, a noble house, physical prowess -- everything Littlefinger wants. On the night the Stark-Tully engagement is arranged, Littlefinger gets drunk. He can't cope with the years of complicated class dynamics, he's heartbroken, and he's what, 14? He's immature and acts like it. Then Lysa rapes him.

I'm not a psychologist so I can't comment on the impact of sexual violence, especially when gender and power play into the situation in this way. However, Lysa did an unforgivable thing, and there was nobody Littlefinger could turn to. That's horrifying. I also think that more should be made about Littlefinger's comments about shutting your eyes and getting it over with in relation to being in bed with "an ugly woman".

Soon after, he challenges Brandon Stark to a duel for Catlyn's hand. Catlyn "betrays" him (in Littlefinger's mind) by giving Brandon her favour, Edmure "betrays" him by "squiring" for Brandon, and then Brandon nearly kills him. So we have a teenager who is 1) in huge amounts of physical pain, 2) without friends or allies, 3) was recently raped and 4) considered unimportant and insignificant. Then, Lysa rapes him again. The fact that this poor child didn't have a full mental breakdown is genuinely suprising.

We don't know if Littlefinger knew about Lysa's pregnancy at the time. What Hoster did to her was also unforgivable -- violence begets violence, and Lysa and Hoster's relationship is full of toxicity and harm. Hoster is also just generally monstrous. If Littlefinger did know, that's another layer of complexity where his foster father aborts Littlefinger's baby, a physical reminder of the sexual violence Littlefinger endured.

A few years later Lysa convinces her then-husband, Jon Arryn, to bring Littlefinger to King's Landing. He is traumatised, he is resentful, and he is cunning. He works hard to enter the places he was once barred from, like the court, the Red Keep and the small council. Now he can take his revenge on everyone who hurt him.

GRRM often talks about the futility of revenge. House Martell is the most obvious example of this, and the speech Elaria gives is beautiful and poignient. Littlefinger doesn't get revenge on Hoster or Brandon Stark. He does kill Lysa, but that's more to shut her up. In a story with a different perspective -- and a few characters kept alive -- we could see Littlefinger as a Kill Bill style avenger, ruining the lives and families of all of those who harmed him. It could be easy to root for him, not against him as the narrative sets up.

Revenge isn't simple, and that's why Littlefinger doesn't succed and isn't an inspirational character. He never confronts anyone on what happened to him -- he's too psychologically damaged -- so instead he kills Ned and Jon Arryn, two people who had nothing to do with his traumatic experiences at Riverrun, and then he hyperfixates on poor Sansa, who looks like Catlyn in his memory. He's immature and stunted in his mid-teens. I wonder if Littlefinger and Sansa lived for another 10/20 years he'd find himself losing interest because she moved on and he can't.

Littlefinger will likely die because of Sansa, and nobody will miss him. He's not a good person. He's groomed and lied and manipulated her, and the horrors he inflicted on Jeyne Poole, supposedly her best friend, are even worse. I don't see his future death as triumphant, though, in an unbiased overview kind of way. The Starks will celebrate, because he killed their dad. No one else will really care. The Lords Declarant have got rid of an annoyance, and he wasn't really working with King Tommen or the Small Council any more.

I think there is some sadness, though, for the child who wanted to be included, wanted to be loved, and who was instead hated, abused, ignored and scarred. RIP Littlefinger, a victim of the patriachy and the class structure.

[haystarlight]

Okay but I can't stop thinking about this

Obviously, back in Ancient Greece, there were no options like we have today. Sex resulting in a child was unpreventable. So the gods really couldn't do anything about the demigod children because goodness knows they're not gonna stop falling in love with mortals.

But things are different now and I wonder about how the invention of contraceptives and the facilitation/legalization of abortion (in some places, at least) would affect the gods.

(longer discussion under the "keep reading", content warning for talk of abortion, sex and how shitty some male gods are)

(Athena doesn't facture in because her method of making demigods is batshit, this is for the demigods that were made with sex) (and for The Big Three, more specifically)

Like I talked with my partner the other day and he says he thinks it's totally possible to abort a demigod fetus and I agreed with him. Because, even though they're stronger than normal humans, half-bloods can definitely die. So, if you were pregnant with a half-blood fetus, I think you *could* abort it like a normal human one.

HOWEVER

What would the god dad think about that. Would they be, like, offended that a mere mortal would have the gall to reject a gift from a god? would they try to punish the mortal for not wanting the demigod fetus? would they see it as "impertinent"?

Or would they be relieved like "oh nice! one less half-blood child to worry about!"?

I'm especially thinking about Zeus, Poseidon and Hades. Obviously. Because they're the ones that made a promise not to have more babies. The others made no such promises but, in their case, you'd think preventing the birth would be in their best interest, right? because you're helping them keep their promise? they should be happy, right?

But, then again, the gods are irrational a lot of the time.

Also, condoms.

Idk if god sperm would be stronger than human sperm. Like, maybe there's a chance the condom wouldn't work to stop it (they do sometimes fail, after all, "only 97% effective" and all that). But this is assuming condoms can stop even god sperm.

Again, you think The Big Three would be like "awesome! a way to keep my promise of no more kids and still have sex!" or would they be like those dude bros that don't like wearing condoms cause "they're too small for me!!!" (shut up they're not)

I'm thinking Zeus at least gives definitely the "I would never wear a condom how dare you" vibe.

Tbh, maybe the gods should try seeking out mortals that already have their tubes tied. That sounds like a plan.

Also for not-maiden goddesses like Aphrodite and Demeter, for example. You think they can just, you know, decide not to get pregnant? cause they're goddesses, maybe they can just do that? tho, since they don't have an oath that tells them not to, they probably don't care enough to decide to not get pregnant anyway?

Also, wild to think the kids whose godly parent is their mom get recognized as demigods from birth, that's crazy.

Also also, I think I remember one character in the books that's a child of Apollo with another man. Which it's cool for the queer representation but also HOW. Like... Rick, is Apollo mpreg canon in the books?! RICK?!

(I'm sure if you ask Rick all this, he just says "I write these books for kids, please leave me alone" but THE WORLD NEEDS TO KNOW)

(I'm pro choice, in case that wasn't totally clear. I'm not saying mortals should be punished for not wanting demigod kids (which is a fictional thing anyways). Of course not. I was just wondering what would the gods think of that)

[kellyvela]

Do you think you would be as big of a Sophie Turner fan as you are based on her other works alone and not Sansa? I ask b/c i think many ST fans (myself included) have become biased in Sophie's favor and tbh not sure she deserves the unwavering support she gets simply b/c she played Sansa Stark.

Sophie's Vogue interview was a shock b/c the lies she told that could be easily disproven as well as being incredibly disrespectful to her kids. Throwing the pregnancy test to her husband and then contemplating abortion b/c her 20s were a time to be frivolous - what was the point in making that story public? All it does is hurt her daughter who will no doubt be bullied by her classmates once they learn how to Google. Sophie is not a planned parenthood ambassador so really the story was fruitless to make public. She should have waited until her daughter is old enough so she hears it from her mother first then if ST decides to share it fine but to do it this way seems selfish and disrespectful to her daughter. The other albeit frivolous lie she told was how she was so used to going with her ex to the LV shows yet last year she clearly went by herself and she went by herself in 2016 when she went for the first time.

Lastly, Sophie's whole having fun dating lie. Sophie lied about barely dating b/c a simple Google search (2019) shows that she said she said on the record that she dated so much that she was ready to marry. I tried to give her the benefit of the doubt but her actions say otherwise. Sophie soft launched Peregrine at her first public work event not even 2 months when her divorced was filed. Her brothers and dad are huge rugby fans, why did she take someone she barely started dating or is being frivolous with where he would be photographed? Celebs don't take flings to places where getty photographers are esp in the middle of a divorce/custody battle unless the guy is serious. But what shocked me was when she deleted her IG post to launch Peregrine. If her marriage was already crumbling why did she do an IG story wishing her then husband a happy birthday (in a gushy way right after their fight) then then proceeded to do an IG post where she's kissing his hand which she only deleted to post her ski post with Peregrine and his friends?

I will always love Sansa esp book Sansa. I say that b/c maybe you can provide counter points to everything I said which is why i'm doing the ask. Sansa is an amazing character that deserves love and Sophie well for as fun and cool as she appears to be, her actions show she's prob the exact opposite of Sansa.

Maybe a lot of Sophie fans love her mainly because she played Sansa Stark, but in my particular case, I started loving Sansa Stark because of Sophie Turner.

But right now, I care about Sophie Turner for more reasons than Sansa Stark. Since Game of Thrones aired the irrational and undeserved hate for Sansa Stark that surpassed the fiction to reality and became irrational, undeserved hate and bullying for the actress, made me very protective of Sophie Turner. So I decided to love her even more, and protect her, and defend her, and support her career after Game of Thrones, and wish for her happiness and wellbeing.

I'm not saying she's perfect and never did wrong, but I won't judge her because at the end of the day I don't know her personally, I don't know her reasons, I don't know her circumstances, she's not my best friend.

Now, about the *lies easily disproven* and being *incredibly disrespectful to her kids,* that is your opinion, and I doubt whatever I can say to you will change that opinion.

It would be easy to argue every one of your critics and accusations against Sophie, but I think it's pointless, not only because you can think whatever you want, but because you pretty much sound like one of those Sophie haters from Twitter that is really a fan of her ex.

However, I recommend you to actually read/re-read the interview and stop repeating the clickbait headlines that took lines without context and/or twisted her words.

Have a good day.

[sheisanimposter]

My rapidly changing thoughts on Ttpd clues (and on some of y’all’s behavior)

The twos, the black and white contrasts, and the nods to past albums feel like a symbol for duality, life and death, dying and rebirth

If that’s the theme of just one album, the up and down books could be the ups and downs of grief, titles of songs that represent moments of despair vs hope

If there is a dual album release, I wonder if it’s an evermore folklore sisterhood album situation where after grief comes hope etc, a quill fountain pen album before a glitter pen album release

Maybe she’s releasing the albums 2 weeks apart, a fortnight, and maybe that’s got other symbolism behind it

I think 2 more albums would bring her to 13, yes? Maybe a new release + reptv on dec 13?

Her bday also makes sense with death and birth themes

2 more albums and then she moves on to whatever her rebirth is? New stage in her career? Marriage? (Though tbh I don’t see Travis as her endgame sorry)

Everything about my knowledge of literature and art history screams that the fertility goddess crumbling is about more than a passing witty lyric, it feels like a symbol for miscarriage or abortion

While I doubt she’d write about abortion due to the safety risk of insane half literate forced birthers while she’s on tour, it would be so so so incredibly powerful to hear a song about complex abortion or miscarriage grief with how republicans are harming women/afab folx in the US right now

Realistically the symbol of crumbling fertility could more likely represent how she can’t wait to move on to the next phase of her life or career without crumbling / she started to crumble when she put her own goals off, it’s giving “my biological clock is ticking” which as a woman about her age I can say is a VERY real feeling even outside of fertility topics (it’s a mid life check in point) , but she probably doesn’t mean it quite so literally as being related to fertility.

She’s not coming out. As a bisexual I’d love her on our team, but y’all are unhinged if you think this is a “surprise I’m queer/trans” album. Even if she was queer I highly doubt she’d make that announcement during an international tour for safety alone. It’s also incredibly offensive as a bi woman to hear people say she’s staying neutral to queer bait or appease people when all she’s done is date who she is (at least publicly) comfortable dating. That is her prerogative, even if she’s attracted to more than one gender. This kind of rhetoric is not only biphobic but disregards the very real safety risks involved with coming out, especially as a celebrity with as many eyes on her as Taylor. Do all allies have to become queer to be safe from queer bait accusations? Come on. Stop putting her in a box where the only way she can please you is by being queer.

The leaks? Yes she’s a billionaire, yes physical record purchases help, but you’re taking away from her numbers and therefore the immense social and economic power she currently holds. Streams = numbers = power in a corporation run society. Every leak you play or promote is one less stream. It’s not that hard to understand, if you want her to keep making waves ya gotta wait like a grown up my darlings

[eggbedthewriter]

SO I have a new hyperfixation and an official quotes book for my school (I never know whats happening over there tbh) so without further ado; Sally Face characters as quotes from my life!!!

-

Larry, high as shit: "I don't know if a penguin could beat a woodchuck"

-

Larry: "I have mental disorders!"

Ash: "which ones?"

Larry: "...I'm just really stupid"

-

Neil: "I'm a homo!"

Sal: "I'm white!"

-

Mrs. Packerton (mostly because this quote comes from my old, very southern, ELA teacher) : "It's not cheating if she's not doing the dude"

-

Todd: "I'm not opinionated! I'm a ginger!"

-

*Sal and Larry arguing*

Ash: "what are you fighting about now?"

Larry, yelling at Sal: "DUDE, RECEIPT PAPER IS THE WORST FLAVOR"

-

Todd, explaining math to Ash: "one swoop goes with one swoop, two swoop go with two swoop"

-

Ash: "So my brother was trying to walk baby Jesus down the aisle and dropped him, he got cleanly decapitated"

Travis: "YOUR BROTHER KILLED BABY JESUS?!?"

Sal: "HE HAD AN ABORTION?"

-

Larry, to Sal: "you can throw the ball at me, just don't throw it at my butt. It hurts after like the 3rd time"

Sal: "thats the point!"

-

Travis: "you have really messed up teeth, are you british?"

-

Sal, to Mr. Addison: "(terrance) you poisioned us all. Thank you very much."

-

Todd: "throwing gang signs at me? God bless the sidewalks for keeping me out of the streets."

(My favorite part is that this was actually said by my math teacher)

-

Sal: "I thought homecoming was a football game???"

-

Larry: "TRAVIS SHUT THE FUCK UP. No one was talking to you!"

(This one was actually said after a kid said 9/11 didn't matter... yikes)

-

Sal: "how do you spell aardvark??"

Larry: "UHHH... A R D V A R C"

[pompelon]

They are different

If you really think the two parties are the same, and you live in a blue state, move to a red state. here's some things that are happening in mine, or have happened:

Republicans are currently trying to trick voters into passing a constitutional amendment banning ranked choice voting - our best chance to chip away at the two-party system. Democrats are currently opposing it.

Republicans are, ironically, also trying to gerrymander the process of passing a constitutional amendment to give voters in red counties more weight - because voters passed amendments they didn't like. Democrats are opposing it.

Republicans wrote and instituted an extremely strict abortion ban immediately after roe v. wade was overturned. Democrats are trying to pass a constitutional amendment to make abortion legal again.

Republicans refused to pass medicaid expansion, and then refused to fund it even after it won an overwhelming majority in a ballot initiative. This led to tens of thousands of people (including me) having no access to healthcare. Democrats led the court battle that forced them to institute the law voters passed.

Republicans are currently defending child marriage; that sixteen-year-old girl who can't get an abortion should be "allowed" to marry the man who impregnated her, they say. Democrats are trying to raise the marriage age.

Republicans have deliberately defunded programs that dispense benefits, resulting in kids literally going hungry. Democrats are trying to fund them.

Republicans have already managed to ban some forms of trans health care and are attempting to ban more. Democrats are opposing it.

Republicans are trying to make it a sex crime to support a trans minor, meaning you could go to prison and be labeled a sex offender for life. They also are trying to make sex crimes against minors punishable by the death penalty. Democrats are opposing it.

Republicans are attempting to repeal environmental regulations to allow businesses more dumping of toxic chemicals into our water without consequences. Democrats are opposing it.

Republicans are oppposed to laws that regulate puppy mills, resulting in us being one of the worst states for this form of animal cruelty. Democrats would like to regulate them - though tbh this is not high on their list of priorities with everything else going on.

Republicans are attempting to relax child labor laws so that children's labor can be exploited more easily. Children are already being found working in chicken plants. Democrats are opposing it.

Republicans are leading the charge to ban LGBTQ+ books, book about the experience of being a racial minority, or basically anything that exposes children to the idea that being white, straight, and Christian isn't the only good type of person. Democrats are opposing the bans.

I am not fond of the Democratic party, my politics are far to the left of them, but here's the thing: They are not the same as the Republicans at all. They have not lost their fucking minds. They're centrists, not leftists, but there are real, meaningful differences between living under a centrist government and living under a fascist one.

Electing Republicans in 2024 isn't going to wake up the country and cause a revolution. My state has been under Republican control for way too long, and we have not fucking woken up. You don't understand how easy it is for ordinary, everyday people to compartmentalize the suffering of others.

I think that people are doing that a little bit too when they say "both parties are the same." The child that can't get an abortion, the parent who can't feed their children, the neighborhood with toxic chemicals in the creek - these are minor abstractions - distractions from the fact that both parties are fundamentally capitalist.

Come to me honestly and say that you cannot vote for Democrats because genocide is your red line, and I will talk to you about how I struggled with that too, and why I decided to vote for Democrats anyway. But if you say that both parties are the same, you are not engaging with the truth of that decision.

[sluttypatrickstar]

i have suffered. i have received unspeakable brain trauma. i have read sentences that i simply cannot unread. that's right, it's time for my chaotic review of verity by colleen hoover!

now i wrote an actual, proper review of this book that used paragraphs and real grammar, but this is tumblr. you're getting the bullet points, you're getting the sweary words, you're getting the dissolution of my sanity.

there's a lot of graphic and disturbing content in this book, so if you're bothered by that kind of thing, it might be best not to read.

the plot:

so our narrator, lowen ashleiggghghghg, is hired by this guy jeremy crawford to finish his wife verity's thriller book series bcus verity was in a car accident and is now profoundly disabled (can't move, can't talk, needs regular care, etc.)

she needs verity's notes and somehow ends up living in verity's house so she can spend literally all day going through verity's office. the only believable part of this is that a writer could be so disorganised that you'd need full days to try and go through all of their stuff

for some context, jeremy is apparently brooding (though i see like, 0 evidence of this) over his wife's accident as well as the deaths of his twin daughters chastin and harper

in verity's office, lowen finds a manuscript that looks like it's verity's autobiography

verity's autobiography starts as overly detailed jeremy smut and oh my fucking god i mean overly detailed i wish i could GOUGE my fucking EYES out this is just BAD PORN this book is like 90% porn 10% no-plot

anyway as this autobiography goes on, lowen is like. holy shit. verity is cuckoo bananas. she is OBSESSED with jeremy. she does that patrick star thing of "what do you when i'm at work all day?" "wait for you to get back :(". she wants to be jezza's ONLY focus and resents her daughters for taking his focus away

like, she tries to plan out her pregnancy so that she'll gain as little weight as possible, but then she finds out they're twins and she's like omg im RUINED and tries to miscarry and abort them

after they're born, she has a premonition of her daughter harper killing her other daughter, chastin (the only daughter she likes, verity fucking hates her kids but randomly starts loving chastin). chastin does in fact die of anaphylactic shock when she's around 8 and verity blames harper

jeremy won't fuck verity because he's so sad about his daughter's death, and verity is not having this, but through some twisted logic she's like maybe he'll be all out of grief if another daughter dies! so she kills harper and stages it as a canoe accident

back to lowen, she's reading this autobiography at an absolute snail's pace (like 1 short chapter a day) while also living with Hot Dad Jeremy (she's into him, especially after reading all that Jeremy Porn), this is most of the book tbh . a series of weird things happen that convince her that verity is faking her disability

lowen is also 100% convinced that verity is PURE FUCKING EVIL from this autobiography

fast forward, jeremy and lowen hook up (surprised pikachu face)

and yes, verity was faking being disabled, where is her OSCAR for that METHOD ACTING that fooled the HOSPITAL the NURSES for MONTHS!!! she didnt even flinch when lowen tried to startle her by literally throwing something across the room. daniel day-lewis is SHAKING

lowen shows jeremy the autobiography and jeremy starts choking verity

lowen is like, stop! they'll know u did it! think of ur son, he'll be fatherless!

actually you should kill him by making her puke instead so they'll think she just aspirated on her own vomit ;)

so jeremy does that instead because that's totally the most sensible option to do in this particular scenario

7 month timeskip and all is great because EVIL verity is DEAD and now lowen and jeremy can be together forever and they even have a new baby on the way bcus jeremy came inside her no condom and apparently every woman in this book is insanely fertile and gets pregnant on the first try

TWIST TIME!!!

they go back to verity and jeremy's house to finish clearing out their stuff

but... lowen finds a note in verity's room...

verity claims that the autobiography was just a writing example to help her write from an antagonistic perspective (her thriller series is notably written from the villain's POV)

jeremy found the autobiography and tried to choke verity to death, but when that failed, he set up her car accident, after which verity decided she had to fake being disabled so she could run away with their living son crew and eventually explain everything

but this plan is an F bcus shes fuckin dead now isnt she

so much effort and for WHAT

the book leaves us with the fucking stupid dry ass cliché question of: WHICH WAS THE REAL VERITY? WHAT WERE THE LIES? WAS THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY REAL OR NOT? and actually i dont give a flying fuck i was just glad to be done

my thoughts

the characters in the book make the most ridiculous and nonsensical decisions and trust me i can say that for sure bcus i have never made a good decision in my life

in the opening chapters, lowen witnesses a car accident & is splattered with blood on the way to her publisher meeting

she encounters jeremy (tho she doesnt know who he is yet) and he takes her to the men's bathroom of a coffee shop to get cleaned up

lowen tAKES HER SHIRT OFF IN FRONT OF THIS ABSOLUTE STRANGER

i am trying to ignore this red flag maybe shes just confident

jeremy proceeds to lock the door to the men's bathroom so that no one else can come in, and lowen finds this comforting! how chivalrous of mr sexy man jeremy!

WHAT THE FUCK LOWEN? HOW IS THIS COMFORTING? I'D BE FUCKING. I'D BE PANICKING SO BAD I'D BE OUT THE DOOR

later in the book we find out that lowen has a chronic sleepwalking problem and can even open inside locks when she's sleepwalking

she broke her wrist sleepwalking when she was a kid so it's not really safe for her to be able to get out and about while sleepwalking

jeremy offers to install a lock on the outside of lowen's bedroom door, so that she can't leave her bedroom without him opening the outside lock for her

instead of finding this FUCKING TERRIFYING

she's Thrilled by his generosity! wow! isn;t jeremy so kind and thoughtful?

lowen! LOWEN!!! GIRL!!!!!!!!!

lucky for her jeremy is apparently a nice guy so jeremy's fucking weird actions are glossed over and theyre so nice arent they... haha...

dude i wanna know what the fuck jeremy has that women are literally OBSESSED with him. hes so bland. he has no personality. he's a cardboard cutout of a man but apparently he has good dick idk

lowen is so besotted with jeremy that she doesnt think it's bad that he tried to kill his wife twice and then succeeded on the third try

no! it's actually so sweet because it proves how much of a dedicated father he is! he thinks verity killed harper so by killing her he's just being such a good and protective dad haha! murder is okay

there was also just way too much sex in this book like i said it before but truly i cannot encapsulate how much of this book was sex. and in case u were wondering about the quality of the sex, 50 shades author EL james is in the acknowledgements of this book.

how are people giving this book 5 stars? it's fucking. it's laughably bad. the plot is so stupid. the characters are boring. no-one makes a single good decision. jeremy is white bread. it's like, really really bad. i really need to know if the straights giving this book 5 stars need help, therapy, or jesus. if u do, please blink SOS in morse code, i will come and get u.

everyone who has a superiority complex because they've never read a single CoHo book is correct . u guys are doing great

[cabeswaterdrowned]

karencamila is so insane I literally love them so bad. Karen really knows and gets Camila imo in a way really no one else in the book does, and I think that’s why when she talked about her in the book are the times Camila feels most like a real person and not other people’s idealized images of her yet the descriptions are so full of love like the Camila wanting pancakes for breakfast and then tricking everyone into having them for breakfast instead of what they actually wanted story being in Karen’s pov, and then so are the scenes where Camila’s strength and faith and love and acceptance are painted as admirable and specifically something Karen relied on to steady her most clearly in the scene where she takes her to the abortion clinic and the way she accepts Karen wanting such different things out of life than she does. 

At the same time, it’s so obvious that Karen looks at Camila and sees everything she would Never ever want to be and everything she would Not want out of life. Karen Camila and Daisy really are supposed to be representative of how very different women can get what they want out of life in different ways (while also not quite getting what all that they want because everyone’s endings are bittersweet which is a big part of what appeals to me about it so much tbh) I reblogged a post comparing them to Jo Meg and Amy March respectively with their roles and I think that 100% tracks and makes sense for the themes there. I enjoy how it’s done overall even though I don’t love that the only brown woman in the story is meant to be this ideal mother figure who has everything figured out and facilitates Karen and Daisy’s complicated arcs (which I do love) around what they want and how that’s different/similar, I liked that in the show it was a bit more obvious she had some bitterness around having to raise Julia on her own while Billy was in the band it felt realistic and did correspond with the part of the book where Karen remembers Camila starting to complain and then sort of backtracking and saying she loves and is totally happy with her life/marriage (which again adds to my Karen-had-the-most-clear-picture-of-Camila belief. or conversely I guess you could say maybe Karen is projecting some of her own baggage onto the memory but I prefer the former more). 

Also I said before that I think Graham very much wants Karen to be his Camila (because he wants Billy’s life) and to turn her into that (Billy writing the first version of honeycomb vs Graham writing the canyon which gets rejected by Billy and Karen is so happy/relieved to not have to sing about him wanting a white picket fence life with her teehee) so I think that would cause a change in how Karen views her too. I do think it’s so interesting even though the show gives us a clearer picture of Karen and the others complacency re: DB (and it does ring true to me that Karen would prioritize what’s good for her career over friendships. I saw someone praising Karen for being a really good friend to Camila and Daisy equally and not getting involved in the love triangle drama… she was not a good friend for that lmao.

And it’s not like she was choosing her friendship with Daisy over her friendship with Camila, and she certainly wasn’t choosing Billy who she has a good repair with and cares for but is not nearly as close with as the two women, I do think if it came down to who of those people/relationships was most important to her even with her respect and soft spot for Daisy it would be Camila… her ambition is top priority for her and that’s the choice she made (I love her so bad <333). And like, in the book there were pages and pages of everyone in the band saying how obvious especially Billy’s feelings for Daisy were (as Billy tried his best to beat the allegations and be all Iwon’tsayI’minlove:mp3 until he was worn down gradually then eventually did a 180 around the 80% mark. They knew what was going on at least most of them, definitely Karen and Graham and Teddy (going off secondhand from Rod) and Rod. I do like that the show muddied a lot of how far characters actually went with their mistakes or unsavory actions or activeness vs passiveness and the resulting harm, and I think it is so fascinating how differently audiences received those choices where they want to draw lines etc.

[dulcewrites]

I’m dying for more of the Fools such in au. Do you have any more ideas/ thoughts you wanted to share about it? What was the moment Aemond realized he and Myrah might actually be happy together and vise versa?

Yes, I do have more thoughts! Thank you for asking First and foremost, I just recommend watching the movie (fools rush in) for anyone who hasn’t seen it. Not even just for this, mainly bc it’s one of my favs and I think others should watch if they haven’t 💀

Anyway onto the thoughts. I’m gonna try to do like a mini timeline of events I could see happening and hopefully that answers some things

Myrah and Aemond meet at a restaurant owned by Myrah’s aunt. In this cute little town right outside the city (where Aemond lives)

They instantly hit it off ofc, go back to Aemond’s hotel…. Baelor is conceived 😊. Myrah books it out of there in the morning before Aemond even wakes up

They go about their business for weeks till Myrah starts feeling tired a lot, and even feeling a bit sick. So she goes to the doctor. The checkup is going pretty normal till her doctor is suddenly like ‘congrats mama 🤭’ and myrah is just like ??? 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

Myrah goes back and forth between even telling anyone and just getting an abortion is secret. But she breaks down one day to her mom bc she scared. Her parents are pretty traditional so ngl it does hurt their soul a bit that their young daughter is pregnant and won’t even tell them who the father is. Her aunt (who owns the restaurant) is like 👀 but also is like ‘girl if you want this baby dead I’ll drive you’

In the end, myrah ends up deciding to keep the baby. Then makes the decision to tell Aemond. Not bc she wants anything but more for him to know. She doesn’t want some guy showing up in 10 years like hmmm is that my kid. But she is nervous bc she knows how this looks. She knew very little about Aemond, or his family. But it takes one google search and she’s like ‘ofc he’s from one of those families’. She comes from a working class background. She can only imagine what his family would think about her

So, she shows up at [insert work place for Aemond I haven’t decided on]. Not super appropriate but she kind of has no other way to reach him.

He is confused to see her. She asks if they can get lunch, mainly bc she wants to tell him in front of people so he doesn’t act up lmao

Anyway he takes it… not great. He excused himself to go scream in the bathroom 😭. But when he comes back myrah reassures him she doesn’t want anything. This was a curtesy thing, and that she (and the baby) will be fine.

Aemond shocks her, and honestly himself, by asking if he can come to the first appointment. Myrah is halfway to saying no bc her parents advised her to cut ties cleanly especially if he doesn’t explicitly say he wants to be around permanately. But he looks so earnest so she says yes.

I sort of debated how I imagine Aemond telling his family, namely Alicent. Honestly I could see him jay blurting it out one night on the phone. Like ‘I’m having a kid’. Now this ofc shocks Alicent. Bc frankly, she thought if any kid would be making her a young grandma is Aegon. But she gives him sound advice about raising a child (especially while not being in relationship with the mom) is not easy. And if he’s not 100% in, he needs to leave them alone for their sake.

the thing that really pushes him to step up is viserys tbh. His father is so critical of him for this. Probably makes some disparaging comments about myah when he hears she’s essentially a struggling artist. Hinting at her doing this on purpose. And Aemond really can’t believe for a moment bc really??? Viserys targaryen has something to say about raising kids??? That’s rich. But then he remembers how clueless his father is so sure he would think he’s a great father/made good decisions and has room to talk

Anyway fast forward to the first appointment with the obstetric. I feel this appointment def lays the early stages of them being good for each other. It should be nerve wrecking and awkward, and don’t get me wrong some parts are, but he holds her hand and when they do the ultrasound he has that’s “their” baby in there.

When they leave, Aemond is very clear about wanting to make it work. Not just co-parenting but with myrah herself

Ok that was super long winded opening to their relationship. Anyway in terms of hiccups they may face. Aemond is a workaholic. Hard to curve and him and myrah butt heads a lot of what things are considered ‘important’ in life. It is understandable when you grow up in the family dynamic he did, that ideals in that department is murky. They both have to create appropriate boundaries before baby Baelor comes.

Moments they realize they could be happy together. For Aemond, the way she gels with his mom and siblings. Mainly Alicent. She also tells viserys and daemon to fuck off one night (she instantly feels guilty. Pregnancy hormones what can ya say) but Aemond loves her for it. Also when Baelor comes, Aemond sort of feels like his heart is bursting. For myrah, the fact that Aemond tries. She isn’t expecting perfection but nothing bothers her more than someone who dwells in their situation when they have the means/wherewithal to get better. Also he is very handson from the get go. One of her fav memories is him shooing her out of the apartment so him and Aegon could paint the nursery. As well decorating the nursery with him

[binkybuzz]

Dream Journal #1

TW: Blood, mild gore

I recently had a dream where I was going to the aquarium with my uncle and aunt and we were looking at cool fishes, when suddenly I was a worm and we kept getting rejected from the pottery classes (in the aquarium ofc) even though we booked in?? So I threw a fit, and some deity took pity(?) on me and granted me some sort of power. I saw Superman but apparently his power came from a green lantern esque ring, so I, the ever-powerful worm kinda just yoinked it from him and put it on my wormy finger, then I became superspeed hacker worm, I ran around the aquarium with my super speed with everyone frozen whilst trying to hack the aquarium's servers to get some data(??) bc I was angry with them. But then Super-Bat-Omni-man moved through the frozen crowd in slow mo and I was like OH SHIT, HE COMING FOR ME, but the computer wasnt loading so I had to switch, right before I moved Super-Bat-Omni-man KICKED ME AND WAS LIKE "YOU THINK I COULD USE MY POWERS WILLY NILLY?? NO I HAD TO TRAIN MY BODY TO KEEP UP WITH IT, JUST BC I DONT HAVE MY RING DOESNT MEAN IM POWERLESS" (I thought that was real cold tbh) and he beat me up, but I started flying towards a heavenly light and all of a sudden everything was back to normal and I was human again and my whole family was walking back from the aquarium but it was dark and there were creepy shadows and menacing people scuffling about. Then we needed to cross some fence thing?? But right when it was my turn to cross, some SCARY-EVIL-BEAR-SKULL-THING-WITH-LONG ARMS™ came to ATTACK ME, luckily my partner lifted me out of the way, BUT WHILE HE DID THAT, THE SCARY-EVIL-BEAR-SKULL-THING-WITH-LONG ARMS™ SLASHED AT HIM AND STOLE HIS LIPS(???) AND HE WAS LEFT WITH A HUGE GASH DOWN HIS THROAT AND WAS BLEEDING TO DEATH, then the SCARY-EVIL-BEAR-SKULL-THING-WITH-LONG ARMS™'s posse of cultists came to rob us and ONE TOOK MY KIDNEY but we were like GOD HAVENT U TAKEN ENOUGH??? And then they were like, true, here's ur stuff back. This is all because of abortion (as a concept?? LET PEOPLE DO WHAT THEY WANT, GOG. NO NEED TO TAKE HIS LIPS AND MY KIDNEY) and tossed me back my kidney but SCARY-EVIL-BEAR-SKULL-THING-WITH-LONG ARMS™ STILL HAD MY PARTNER'S LIPS AND HE WAS STILL DED™ SO I WAS YELLING AND PANICKING AND TRYING TO FIND HELP

and then i woke up :)

[a-had-matter]

fuck fuck fuck we're all fucked. People really need to work on their aim next time they try to assassinate someone tbh. Just a little to the right and like 5 more rounds. I want a fucking 3rd option. Why can't we have a fucking 3rd option?? Why are people voting for goddamned Trump when he's going to be the end of all of us . He's racist, transphobic, doesn't truly believe in women's rights, and is built like annoying orange. He wants to nuke innocent people and he's getting away with drug abuse cause fucking Trump supporters want this man to make America great again. Biden might not be making much change as to my knowledge but at least he isn't working toward our ultimate downfall. He says people respect him. No trump, they laugh at you. They mock you. Cause you are doing our supposed enemies' bidding. They don't have to kidnap shit when you can neglect and lead your supposed people to their deaths. I may not be up to date in politics, but people need to stop worrying about other countries and look at our own. People always say There are people starving in Africa but there's people starving everywhere. Guess what?! There's people starving in America! And there's grocery stores and food industries throwing away perfectly good food. And don't get me started on the periods and abortions, and the general acceptance that slavery did not happen in America, and that no one's actually racist but the thing is is everyone is actually racist. People through around slurs like they're Lambert rolls, and joke about history as if they could live like that. And with the redefining of words it seems that no one knows what actual feminism is, and so we hate on women's rights. and people are just so undereducated and we're genuinely devolving ( de-evolving??) And nurses are getting assaulted and nothing happens to stop it, teachers shit on and SAed and generally disbelieved when it's said that the students did it but everything is so sexualized and no one has had an actual ass beating cause that shit builds character. But there should really only be two ways to raise a child, you can beat their ass and explain what they did wrong before, or actually gentle parent and not take shit from your child. Nobody should be taking shit from a child. There are few other acceptable ways of raising them in my book, and these days people and children are plain terrible, and America is digging itself deeper and deeper into it's own shit and we all know that Donald fucking Trump is not going to get us out, and I just wish there was someone better for to make good changes for our country but there isn't but people should know it's not gonna be Trump and I know I usually don't talk about politics or say this sorta stuff a lot but fuck. We're all fucked

I'm not gonna tell you how to vote, BUT...

Here are some truths about the upcoming United States election.

Either Trump or Biden will win.

Our political system is designed around ensuring that either the Democrat or the Republican win. There is no "but if everyone rallies around a third party candidate..." argument, because...

Grassroots campaigns can't work. There are areas of the country that don't have internet or television. Congress just allowed the Affordable Connectivity Program to lapse, denying internet to even more people. There is literally no way for some candidates to get their message to huge parts of the country.

The Republican and Democrat candidates are backed by huge donor machines that enable them to tour a campaign trail. Independent candidates do not have this luxury.

Our country still uses a First Past the Post (FPTP) voting system, which is specifically designed to support only two candidates.

Our country uses an electoral (all or none) system, which is why you hear that voting for a third party candidate "takes votes away" from one of the major party candidates. For example, if Trump gets 48,999 votes, Biden gets 50,000 votes, and a third party candidate gets one single vote, Biden takes all the electoral votes in the state. All of them.

I really hope you make your peace with this now. Please, vote how you want, but with one candidate saying he will essentially outlaw transgender people, I can't imagine NOT voting for the only other candidate who can possibly win. Right now the polls are 50/50, which is absolutely insane to me.

In my experience, it's usually younger people who talk about either voting their conscience, or not voting at all to "send a message." I assure you, not voting doesn't send a message to the candidate who loses. Your message is only received by the millions of Americans who will suffer as a result.

I don't want to argue. I have no desire to fight with anyone over this anymore. And if you want to ask me "so I have to choose between two killers?" as a gotcha, then I'm sorry to say... The answer is yes. Those are the choices we've been given. And because the United States is no longer a true democratic republic, there's not a whole lot we can do to change that right now.

[howtowearblackinthesummer]

So today:

1. I had a breakthrough with an *interesting* Prek child

2. I got to watch monsters university as part of the curriculum (bcuz I make the fuckin curriculum and they are earning their Master’s in Markers)

3. I had a filling lunch

4. I could actually eat at lunch time

5. I got fucked (VERY WELL) right after lunch

6. I got 2 free tickets to an Orioles game and invited one of my best friends

7. The liquor store I went to was engraving bottles so ours said “Goddess Queen Princess Energy” 😂

8. We successfully smuggled in SO MUCH alcohol and snacks

9. The Orioles fuckin WON 🥳

10. There was a barcade on the way back to the car

11. It was also free book day at the Book Escape so we stopped for some free books and made out w some Gems

12. We got home safe

13. I properly prepared for work tomorrow w an energy drink and breakfast

14. I was taught about “We Didn’t Start The Fire”

15. I generally go into Thursday’s expecting the worst and today was pretty lucky tbh.

Im SÚPER grateful for my life and the abundance that comes with it. While I may get sad when I feel like I don’t have anyone to share these things with, I hope I’ll remember this post and that there are some people who care.

No im not talking about you weirdos lol but my loved ones KNOW that I love them unconditionally and without a single doubt. They know that I may be a lil late but i will ALWAYS be there for them. They know their happiness, successes and wins are celebrated alongside my own in my eyes. I love them and they love me; without hesitation or questions they know my heart and I know theirs. It’s the romantic partners I’m not too sure about lol but the real ones are actually tangible and I love that for me.

Today was great 💖 this is around the time I had an abortion so I get cyclically sad before I realize why fr. I’m just getting hip to that pattern in my life lol BUT this is definitely tipping those scales towards happiness and I love that for me 🥰

Any naysayers can go fuck themselves honestly lol this page is for my own records since SWBK is temporarily gone (bcuz if it’s banned I could just use the same domain…right?) idk about that but I’m just happy to not be using bum ass Twitter anymore I fuckin hated it I felt so visible and not seen and that’s a weird fuckin feeling lemme tell you

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

166 of 2023

More secrets from others...[True or False]

Created by joybucket

These are all random people's secrets that I found posted on the Internet. Put an X by the secrets which you share with these random people. Have fun! :)

I value my alone time a lot. I love planning my future/ dream life out on Pinterest boards. I wish I were prettier. I want more friends tbh. I've tried to hold in my cough so people wouldn't think I had COVID. My biggest fear is getting older. My playlists is so good, but I'm embarrassed by it. I feel like I have been living my whole life inside of my imagination. 💭 Every day is the same. I'm bored. 😑 We've been trying so hard for a baby. I like being alone, but I don't like feeling lonely. I'm insane. I judge people by their music taste. I just want to be done with school. I'm so glad I never cried over a boy. I want to learn to play guitar. 🎸 I need to start listening to my own advice. I wish people's looks were based on how they are as a person. I wish I didn't have to look at myself from a certain angle to feel pretty. I wish I had talent. I love being me. I feel like I'm the only girl who hasn't mastered the hot messy bun look. Waking up to snow is like waking up to a new world. ❄️ I am probably the kindest hateful person you'll ever meet. I honestly don't know how I'm still alive. My room is my safe place. My parents don't know I'm gay. If they found out I'd end up homeless. I learned more about how to be a good person from the Harry Potter books than I ever did from a religious text. I want to be a mommy, but the idea of carrying a child scares me to no end. There is so much that could go wrong. 🤰 I truly hate myself. I had an abortion. It's hard to believe God is in control when bad things keep happening. I want to go back to believing in everything and knowing nothing at all. Sometimes I think my fiancé isn't "the one." We are all a part of something bigger, and we are all in it together. People think I've stopped lying....but I've just gotten better at it. I am not a religious person, but I envy people that are. I can't bear to tell my family I relapsed, so instead I quietly suffer alone. Most days, from the moment I wake up to when I go to sleep at night...I am unhappy. I hate my parents for raising me in a religion that taught me to hate myself. I'm a pastor, but sometimes the people I lead believe in God more than I do. I've always felt like I'm the ugly duckling in my friend group. When I tell my parents, "I love you," it feels like a lie. I sometimes resent my friends for being prettier than me. Infertility is making me lose my faith. I'm jealous of religious people, because I wish I could believe like them. I make everyone believe that I like to be different, but really I just don't know how to fit in. I am not a Christian anymore. I believe that without my unanswered prayers, I would never have found the love of my life. I wish people would spend as much time on their marriages as they spend on their wedding. 💒 I am rarely alone, yet I am so very lonely. I wish someone would just ask the question. My answer would be, "Yes, I am gay. Thanks for asking." My therapist committed suicide. I've attempted suicide more times than I can count. I have no one. I need someone. Sometimes I wish I believed in God. Then I could pray for another chance. I'm scared this life is all we get. It makes me angry that she got pregnant by accident, and I can't do it on purpose. I miscarried at her unplanned baby shower. I'm in love with a child I haven't yet met... I smile all the time so nobody knows how lonely and sad I really am. My biggest fear is that if I have a daughter, she will inherit my eating disorder. The fact that I haven't fallen in love yet bothers me more than the fact that I'm a virgin. I'm a Christian who is falling in love with someone who doesn't believe in God. I started believing in God again... I wish I could have realized how beautiful I really used to be. I'm a therapist, and some of my favorite people are my clients. As a bisexual, it is hard for me to accept that some people are COMPLETELY gay and some people are COMPLETELY straight. The reason I don't go to church is because I'm too scared. My church is the only thing keeping me from taking my life. I can't afford the help I need. I'd rather get skin cancer than be pale. I hate my college, but I'm too scared to admit it. 📚 I hate college, but I feel obligated to make this seem like "the best years of my life." My chronic illness has taught me patience. I don't care about recycling, but I pretend to. ♻️ I have a severe donut addiction. 🍩 I wonder if I'm anyone's crush. I've never had a celebrity crush. (well, just one) I had an abortion, because I knew my church family would disown me if they found out I got pregnant outside of marriage. The abortion made me realize that I want to have a kid. I didn't want to be a mother until after I had an abortion. I wish my friends and family understood the pain inside me. I'm trying to figure out exactly what it was that made me lose my voice. Just because I'm skinny doesn't mean I'm happy with my body. I fear that the person who writes my obituary will have nothing to say. I don't believe in God, but I am scared to come out as an atheist. I am proud to say I am well on my way to becoming the adult I prayed for as a kid. I don't know if I want to fix this life, or start a whole new one by myself. I'm a nonbeliever, and I only go to church because of someone I love. Ironically, I feel as if art school has stifled my creativity. I would become a Buddhist if my family wouldn't hate me for it... I'm an atheist, but sometimes it's nice to pray. 🙏 I fear I will spend my life waiting for a love story that doesn't exist. I only put money in the collection basket at church when I want something from God. I leave Bible study early so I don't miss my favorite TV show. I'm afraid my life won't be as exciting as I want it to be. I'm not religious, but I'm afraid of going to hell. I felt more beautiful when I was pregnant than I ever have in my life!