#YOU WANT ME TO PLAY DARK URGE. AND NOT GET THE SLAYER?

[devotedlystrangewizard]

im sure the redemption route is very good but I Am Not Immune To Bhaal's Little Gifts

[kawareo]

Sceleritas Fel. Your loyal, and ever-adoring, butler.

I love this guy but to me he is one of the scariest part of the Dark Urge story

When I first met him, I thought he was hilarious and silly and that it was cute how much he genuinely loved Durge, and then it hit me just how fucked up the fact that I thought so was.

I find Sceleritas as a concept so interesting! He is there to provide someone for Durge to talk to, someone he can think he can trust - but can he, really? Sceleritas is, in the end, an extension of Bhaal. Everything he does he does in a way that pushes Durge towards Bhaal. The way he babies Durge is funny at first but then it scares me; Durge is not allowed to grow up and mature emotionally so that he has to always stay daddy's special boy. Durge's concerns are brushed off and he's scolded like a child. Slayer form gets called 'jimjams' and even that is babied. Scel compliments him all the time and at the same time never takes his actual words as something serious. Durge isn't even allowed to make up his own mind about anything - i'm thinking back to Sceleritas telling him that his Urges are his true nature, his own thoughts that are trying to claw their way outside, when I'm pretty sure it's canon that the Urge is Bhaal's will that is implanted in Durge's mind.

Another thing is what Scel says when you kill him as a Slayer - every death brings out a smarter, better Sceleritas. No wonder he enjoys you killing him, it literally makes him better!

He's also a pretty shitty butler, as you can tell from the flashback scene where he fucks up and accidentally slices a vein of a victim Durge was dissecting alive. Why? Because he was 'drunk on the job, again'. That kind of goes against everything Scel leads you to believe about himself and is so interesting to me.

Scel exists to make sure Durge doesn't have a need to talk to or trust or be with anyone else, his social and more mortal needs are satisfied in a way that is no risk to bhaal or his dogma. Everything around Scel screams gaslighting and something extremely icky and the worst part is that it is really easy to see how Durge would fall for what Scel appears to be at first glance.

But then again, this is just my interpretation, and I do tend to prefer to look at darker side of things especially when it comes to the Temple of Bhaal, I do want to explore this take on Sceleritas and Durge's relationship more in my fics, just how smothering and toxic it actually is. Again, just my interpretation, but Scel is also part of why Strike is the way he is when it comes to sex, the butler played a big role in normalizing sexual abuse in the temple to the point where Strike isn't even aware of it being abuse in the first place.

[nicollekidman]

season six spuffy is also nuts bc spike is clearly like. please just tell me i’m good and let me sit at your feet on the off chance you want to give me scraps and buffy WANTS to hold his leash (and yank on it) and she wants him to bite her hand so she has an excuse to hit him except. that sort of urge would upend the status quo (not just in their relationship but again, the bedrock the slayer/vampire dynamic is built upon) so instead spike has to play the corrupting influence to buffy’s reluctant and seduced white knight and it doesn’t fit either of them anymore!!!!!!!! spike says “you belong here in the shadows with me” but it sounds like “i accept you for all that you are and nothing in the dark could resist you” spike says “stop me” but it sounds like “tell me what you want” spike says “look at your friends and tell me you don’t like getting away with this” and it sounds like “isn’t this fun isn’t this worth Being Alive”

[meecrowav]

I played as the dark urge, went in completely blind (like. really blind. My roommate said you can fuck up your character and I was like iM Fucking IN baby (I didn't even know about what happens as the dark urge, he was mostly talking about the tadpoles in the head). Their name was Ainslie (bard, I think). Ainslie had pastel purple skin and pastel pink hair.

Here's some things that happened in that run:

Didn't get Karlach cause I did the goblin camp + saving grove before, and she didn't want to join me so I had to kill her : (

Didn't get Gale cause I didn't know where he was : (

Didn't get Lae'zel cause she was being rude and didn't recruit her : (

Didn't take enough long rests during Act 1 so Astarion did his "heyyyy sooooo umm I'm a vampire! Haha! Lol!" later in game

Didn't romance anyone because I missed all of the major events by being awkward and clueless

Pity fucked the emperor

Killed Isobel, defied Bhaal, got the bad ending

Anyhow, had a thought about my first BG3 run while drawing some other things. :

Would be jacked cause of all the protein intake and all the cardio they get in

I think it would be interesting to see durge have traces of slayer form after they use it (shown above with scars and smaller spikes)

semi-related, I think the slayer form is too sticky and its far worse when you are using it compared to when Orin uses it.

[judasiskariot]

OC Deep Dive

Tav Edition ~ Saulus

My lovelies @pinkberrytea and @aristenfromwarsaw tagged me 💋❤️ thank you!💗

I tag @alpydk and @goromimii

Pinkberry did theirs so amazing. Always so detailed with love that you really get to the character, almost like a small fanfic about them 😍🌸💗✨️

So I will do it for my Tav/Durge Saulus

What common/uncommon fear do they have?

Saulus is afraid of getting judged because of her Tiefling looks. So when she is nervous she holds her tail like a security blanket. And she is afraid of sticky children hands, grabbing her unasked by her tail and horns. (May have happened, since than she is scared of it)

Do they have any pets?

Saulus LOVES animals, so I would say totally: YES! But I don't know how it was in the temple of bhaal, were pets allowed? If not, she would have a secret one at Baldur's Gate where she can visit it. Sceleritas was kind of her pet. xD Nooo! This is mean. He is her butler and friend! (maybe little bit pet😉) In camp we have Scratch. Now she collects what she can get of course, and the owlbear is NOT her pet, it is her (adopted) son! They will stay with her forever. Therefore she dislikes, despises people who are cruel towards animals.

What are 3 items you can find in their bedroom?

Owlbear cub, Astarion's security blanket, her instruments

What do they notice first in a person?

Be aware! She is a bard who uses vicious mockery very often, so when there is something bad to notice, oh she will and you will hear about in a way you probably will not like. And if you are a little nice to her, she will totally pick it up as flirting, be also aware!

On a scale from 1-10, how high is their pain tolerance?

As Dark Urge I would say high. 8 But I also like the imagination, that she can be both: Very tolerating and than scream and whine about a little scratch when in the wrong place. Like: I not dare looking: Say it, my tail is gone, isn't it?🫣😭 And it is nothing. So 1-8 xD

Do they go into fight or flight mode when under pressure?

FIGHT ! (Not called Bhaal BATTLE Beer Bard for nothing!)

Do they come from a big family/are they a family person?

You know the Durge stuff. And YES. She would have no problem calling Bhaal her daddy, Sceleritas is her friend and all the bhaal assassins a family. Seeing it as bard more romantic than it was. Therefore the companions are her family. The owlbear cub her son and later post game she marrys Astarion and they have 4 children. And Saulus wants all the companions never to leave, would like that they all stay together, because they are uncles and aunts of their children. Ketheric Thorm survives and because Isobel do not want him, Saulus declares him as Opa Ketheric for her babies. So she is very very much a family person. (only her lyrics are absolutely not family friendly xD)

What animal represents them best?

Aries or Owlbear because of the cub. Does the slayer count as animal? Than also the Slayer!

What is a smell they dislike?

Rat tea (do not ask...or ask Astarion why)

Have they broken any bones?

I don't know. Maybe yes as Durge. In any case the owlbear cub bit her tail by accident while playing and it was the hell for her.

How would a stranger likely describe them?

Easy to get along with, inspiring, contagious funny and cheerful, sarcastic, sassy, naughty, loudmouth, little bit crazy

Are they a night owl, or morning bird?

As a bard the nighttime is her inspiring witching hours. But she can do both. Drink all night and get wasted, but stand up with the sun above her and with a smile on her lips.

What’s a flavor they hate and a flavor they love?

Hate: rats (again, ask Astarion but he will claim that she loves it) Love: The skin of her loved ones (she likes kisses and love bites), Thisobald's blue beer! (even everyone tells her to stop drinking it)

Do they have any hobbies?

Bard duties are her life! Singing, writing is the thing she does all the time! She loves to party: Drinking and dancing til the morning!

Boom, surprise birthday party! How do they react to surprise?

She screams because of happiness and than drink, dance and playing songs like there is no tomorrow.

Do they like to wear jewellery?

Yes yes yes, she likes to be fancy! She would wear horn bling bling if she could. But sees the necessities of protection of armour in battle first. DAGGER EARRINGS with helix piercings are her life!!!

Do they have neat or messy handwriting?

As a bard she likes doing calligraphy but when the urge is working in her, her for blood thirsting hands can write very messy.

What are the two emotions they feel the most?

Joy & Love

Do they have a favourite fabric?

Astarion would say his cuddle blanket but it is NOT! (It is scratchy and mean and he...no he does not know it, that is the problem) Let's say...owlbear feathers :D (because the cub wanted Astarion to make a blanket out of his fallen out feathers)

What kind of accent do they have?

I will also look up which voice I used like @pinkberrytea :D Now I am at my second Saulus run and accidently picked my tav Devorah's voice and it freaked me out hearing Saulus speaking in the wrong voice.

[veilody]

Azúcar - Archfey Warlock Githyanki

"Oh, you insult me! I assure you, I'm Baldurian born and bred........ No, I'm actually not."

Alignment: Chaotic Good

Background: Folk Hero

Known as: Slayer of Monsters

Patron: Archfey Titania - Queen of the Summer Court

Love Interest: Karlach

Friends: Wyll, The Dark Urge (in a "Resist the Urge"-Route), Lae'zel, Halsin, Jaheira, Shadowheart

Azúcar is a stray egg. For some reason, she can't remember, she grew up in Feywild instead of a Githyanki Crèche and only starts to question her upbringing after meeting Lae'zel. She has the slightest hunch that her Faerie Patron might be involved with this... Although she isn't mad, since she has an unique perspective towards the undying Lich Queen Vlaakith and how she rules her empire.

As someone who has a pact with Faeries and grew up among their kind, she's prone to deceiving people, to get what she wants. Though, once you earned her trust, you're privileged to get her honest opinions and support. If you need an ally who will go through the nine hells with you - you oughta gain her friendship.

Childhood

She grew up under her patrons - Archfey Titania - watchful eyes and thus grew to respect nature. It was necessary for her to gain a silver tongue and keen insight to not get tricked by the other feys. Azúcar faced different trials than the Githyanki growing up in Vlaakiths reigns. Instead of spilling blood she had to - first and foremost - sharpen her senses to deception and trickery.

When she turned 12 Titania revealed that Azúcar is a child of the stars and she brought her to her realm to see if such a child can be worthy to become her Champion. Titanias Champion felt like a goal she needed to reach. So she started to train her magical skills. Within the realms of the Archfey magic flowed easily.

Champion

As teenager she was devoted to become Titanias champion and trained for it the entire time she was awake, honing her skills with magic, daggers and books. It was a determination that drove her almost into insanity. With the humble age of 15 she started to prove herself in various trials made for her by the Archfey, to test her skills, her cunning, her smarts and her faith. Four tests.

With each test passed, she gained a Tir'su slate, that provided her some of the Astral Knowledge her kind was famous for. The final test, gained her the favour of her Archfey.

Azúcar has spent 10 years devoted to hunt monsters in the name of her patron, growing to be an excellent slayer of monsters, sometimes praised as hero by common folk that was afflicted by the terror these monstrosities brought with them. The only ones who understood the purpose behind her actions were oftentimes Druids - as they recognized her as touched by Titania, bringing summers' light into the dire times.

The Nautiloid

During her adventures in Faerûn she was teleported into the Nautiloid amidst the chaos that its arrival caused. As she was still trying to process what just happened, she already got probed with that detestable worm. That... is problematic. Not even her patron can help her with this affliction. Luckily she found allies with the same problem. She's especially curious about the cure her kin is talking about - yet, she is suspicious of the Githyanki empire - after all she's heard about their actions on Toril. Actions, that oftentimes brought strangers to point with the finger on herself.

If they want to survive and win over the cult of the absolute they need to build trust to each other... And have a keen sense when it comes to honeyed words, speaking of hidden potential.

She has a strict hygienic routine.

Very playful. Will try to make you believe she's a nymph in disguise.

She has a weak stomach when it comes to... Gore. Thanks, absolute.

If diplomacy fails, burn the place.

Plays the Lyre.

Her right eye is a glass eye, provided by Volo..

-1 strength. Give her the club of Hill giants strength!!

[black-is-iconic]

It's Okay Not To Be Okay

As the days flew by your weapon of choice came in it was a two chain linked katana that extended out like a whip made of small curved blades  when  you swung it around. It was elegant,  sleek, graceful and perfect for slashing anything to pieces, your  kasugai crow which you promptly named Yuki landed on your shoulder and cawed a greeting nodding her head which you returned. "Lady Y/N L/N please quickly head north west of here a concerning amount of women have been disappearing Kamado Tanjiro Is already on his way there but your presence is requested as well to make sure things go smoothly"  Yuki murmured as you stroked her feathers. A heavy sigh falls from your lips as you thought about having to be shacked up that chatter box for a couple of nights. "Alright", you sighed defeatedly glancing and set off for the northern area enjoying the silence before the storm, it wasn't long before you crossed paths with  your fellow slayer Tanjiro, instantly upon seeing you he ran over like an excited dog and began talking your ear off which you gave short one worded replies to. He didn't seem to get that you didn't want to talk and just kept rambling on, "it's so nice to see you again, whats your weapon look like what color did it change to when you touched it?" 

He beamed as you turned and glared at him over your shoulder, "do you ever stop talking?" You  snapped annoyed causing him to recoil and laugh awkwardly, "haha I' have been talking alot huh" he said softly and you sighed rubbing your face and regretting your next actions thoroughly. "It's two chain linked katana that becomes a whip made of smaller blades when swung" you explained  with a faint smile and after a brief pause, "and it turned light purple" you finished as tanjiro beamed up at you "wow that's so cool !". He beamed and you fought off the urge to smile at his  innocent enthusiasm, friendship is a weakness your mind echoed  in your inner self reminding you of all the people you loved dearly that were gone forever. Don't let him in keep him OUT you told yourself sternly before speeding up a little bit and bumping into a disoriented boy, he had pale skin that seemed a bit  greyed, his hair short, black as coal as a chilling dark shade of purple with staring at nothing a he looked up past you. "You should watch where you're going" you hissed helping him back to his feet (even though you bumped into him) and brushing him off he gave you a blank stare mumbling a quick "uh", "Mister Kazumi" Tanjiro called and the man turned slowly to him "I want to hear what happened last night from you" the man- Kazumi just stared blankly mumbling "alright then follow me".

He then lead you to the edge of the village between two fences "this is where she vanished" he said a a monotone dejected voice "but I'm sure you don't believe me" he finished you stood next to Tanjiro examining the clearing for something suspicious or out of the ordinary "we do believe you, and we're here to help" Tanjiro spoke earning a eyeroll from you "don't speak on my behalf" you  muttered under your breath "oh" he blinked  "you don't actually believe he had a hand to play in the disappearance do you?" Tanjiro murmured with a tilted head and furrowed brows and you pursed your lips doing a quick sweep of Kazumi, "no" you finally replied after a  moment of contemplation "but you'd be surprised what some people can get up to in the shadows when they think no one is looking".

Tanjiro looked at you confused and it was clear your breath was wasted on him, "look just don't  go trusting anyone all willy nilly that's how you get  yourself in trouble", Tanjiro smiled at you "right" he said before dropping to the floor and sniffing the ground......what the fuck is he doing god he's a fucking weirdo why did I have to get paired up with this  idiot....out of the corner of your eye you caught Kazumi being weird as well caressing his cheek which seemed swollen and crying....gods please don't cry I'm terrible with  emotions....... "got something" Tanjiro suddenly shouted from the ground and took off running without giving any kind of explanation. With an annoyed sigh you and Kazumi gave chase and followed him to the homes where he sat crouched sniffing a wall.  People started to stop stare and whisper about Tanjiro's weird antics and you hid your face behind your palm as you rested you hand at the side of your face "Kamado stop being weird" you hissed through clench teeth but he ignored you and just kept sniffing the ground while you and Kazumi watched on in confusion, soon enough day bleed into night as you still found yourself patrolling the streets of the village "I want you to believe me, me she really did vanish" Kazumi spoke up softly you squinted at him still not entirely believing him but not ruling out demons just yet Tanjiro turned with a confidence and said I know".

He face was serious his smile long gone replaced by a neutral stare "that's why I came here to stop this...we will find the demon who did this" he finished and continued walking  with you and Kazumi in pursuit as the moon rose higher into the night a certain unease settled in the pit of your stomach and your hand rested on the edge  of your blade, Tanjiro must've felt it too because he mimcked your stance...smart boy you completely tuned out Kazumi and Tanjiro as they conversed feeling that uneasy feeling grow...a demon was in the area...you're just not sure where yet and then suddenly Tanjiro grabbed your hand running off again without explaining anything "where are we going now?"

You hissed and he didn't bother answering as you sped through the streets "we have to hurry the scents stronger the demon's active " was the only thing he said  before jumping on a roof, you quickly followed suit wondering how the fuck he knew that but you could question him later right now you had a mission and lives were at stake running along the rooftops the too of you dropped into the same fenced in area as earlier and slide to a stop. You unsheathed you're nichirn blades and dropped into a fighting stance "why are we in a empty area kamado" you asked but he ignored you angling his sword into the ground and striking causing black water to spew forth and spread along the floor which you swiftly backed away from, floating in the water was a hoari and you swiftly grabbed it hauling the girl from the water and jumping back right as a pale grayish purple demon claw extended forth snatching at the rims of her kimono and tearing the fabric. 

"What did you do with the girls you kidnapped" Tanjiro shouted and your lips formed a tight line as you thought it was quite obvious what happened to them, instinctively your hands tightly coiled around the unconscious girl tighter.... never again would you allow a demon to ruin an innocent life...if you could help it...starting with this girl the demon began grinding your teeth and you winced as that sound was very annoying "there are some things I want to know" Tanjiro continued to speak but the demon just glared in annoyance and dropped back into the floor. Shit I can't defend myself if he attacks me your mind echoed as you braced for an attack but right on time Kazumi appeared.

You quickly handed the unconscious girl to him, "hold her and stay behind us" you instructed picking up your weapons again as he just stared "as long as you do that we can protect you" Tanjiro stated walking forward you tensed watching the walls and ground closely suddenly Tanjiro turned in your direction but three inky black puddles formed on the ground as six pairs of arms reached for him Tanjiro was quick to leap out of the ring of demons and swiftly shot forth slashing on of your blades. The blade unfurled itself with a metal snapping sound and swiftly decapitated two of the demons but the third one mange to slink back into the inky pool like a bug and you cursed under your breath. "Wow you're so amazing !" Tanjiro exclaimed with wide eyes as you kicked him in the chest sending him stumbling back and out of the way of the demons slashing claws "STAY FOCUS" you snapped and he flushed "r-right" suddenly the demon growled "BASTARD" reemerging from the inky black water. 

You we're quick to switch position and crack your whip like sword sending it's sharp  point towards the demons throat at break neck speeds but it dipped back into the water "she'll go stale stay out of the way you little punks" the hissed reemerging from a wall to slash at you, but Tanjiro swiftly cut off it's arm, "the girl's sixteen already she's loosing flavor by the second" it screeched in a crazed rant "if I don't eat her soon there won't be any flavor at all" the blood in your veins began to  boil, how dare it? How dare it say such cruel things! the echo of bubbling water sounded behind Tanjiro and swiftly whipped your other sword behind you catching the rising demon by surprise and decapitating it before a word could fall from it's lips, Tanjiro gazed at you in silent  admiration for a moment as you stepped forward "enough games let's kill this thing now". Tanjiro nodded and the demon slunk back into the murky water silence engulfed the clearing as you tried to predict where the demon would come from there was a chance it would go for Kazumi and the unconscious girl...but you we're guarding it so it probably wouldn't risk it, then it could always go for you but you've decapitated it three times already...it was most likely cloning itself and seeing as you've already torn through three of the clones sending more clones to attack you or it'd true form..so that only left Tanjiro.

Leaping forward you cracked you sword and right as the demon reemerged from the ground with it's sharp like talons pointed at Tanjiro's eye but your whip like blade cut cleanly through it's arm making it hiss and screech at you "you little bitch" it spat venomously grabbing your ankle shit I underestimated it your mind  raced in panicked alarm as it began swiftly dragging you into the water but Tanjiro quickly tackled you knocking you out of the demons grasp as it hissed again grinding it's teeth. "You okay?" Tanjiro asked as you both sat breathing heavily you opened your mouth to scold him for taking his eyes off the enemy but quickly wrapped your arms around him rolling him and yourself out of the way of the demons slashing claws from the ground, quickly springing to your feet and slashing at yet another of the clones severing both it's arms and head.

"You stupid stupid little bitch GET OUT OF MY WAY DIE DIE DIE DIE" the demon shouted as all the clones slashed and clawed at you from multiple inky black pools all around but you and Tanjiro fought back to back paring each strike and returning one of your own, "we can't keep fighting like this" Tanjiro spoke over the growling of the demon "I agree but we don't have much of an opening" you countered stabbing one of the clones hands and cutting off it's finger, "I have an idea cover for me" he said with an air of confidence so you gripped both hilts of your swords and began slashing mercilessly through the hands of his clones as Tanjiro dove for one of the inky black pools. Your eyes widened in alarm as you looked at him baffled earning a nasty slash to the cheek due to your momentary distraction quickly cutting through one of the demon clones you rushed over catching Tanjiro by his foot before he fully disappeared into the water and pulled him out, "what are you doing?"

He asked squirming in your grasp "what am I doing what are you doing why are you going in there" you seethed a vein pulsing on the side of your head "we have to kill the main demon and I think in here so I was going to go after it"  you blocked an attack from the demon and glared down at Tanjiro, "we're you dropped on the head as a child that's literally the dumbest shit I've ever heard your going to try and beat the demon in it's own turf while submerged in murky water that it's accustom too....how do you plan to kill it?"

You seethed and Tanjiro looked at you confused with an arched brow "with a breathing style" he said in a tone as if it was the most  obvious thing in the world "AND HOW THE FUCK DO YOU PLAN ON USING A BREATHING STYLE UNDER WATER YOU FUCKING IDIOT"  Tanjiro opened his mouth to protest but then his cheeks tinted pink and a bead of sweat rolled down his forehead "oh yeah you're right...I'm sorry" he mumbled and you kicked him (a little harder than needed) out of the way of the demon slashing claw "don't be sorry use your fucking head you have a brains for reasons". You groaned as the demons claws slashed your thigh. A pained hiss escaped you as you gripped your thigh tearing a piece of fabric from your undershirt and wrapping it tightly around your thigh  "MOVE OUT OF THE WAY" Kazumi shouted shoving you aside as you stood back up tacking a slash to the arm for you, you quickly recovered springing at the demon and decapitating it's head before turning around eyes lightly widening as you stared down five razor claws coming for your eye. Shit it's too fast, I won't be able to react your  thoughts rang through your ears your hands tensed around the hilts of your swords and tensed awaiting the lethal blow, but out of your peripheral vision  you saw a burgundy blur before Tanjiro slashed through the demons arms and it stumbled to the ground backing up to the wall while grinding it's teeth and hissing at the two of you.

Blood splattered your face but you wiped it with your sleeve collapsing onto the ground as the pain from your thigh became a bit too much,  you took a deep breath wincing softly and applying pressure to try and stop the bleeding making sure to pact the wound while watching the exchange between Tanjiro and the demon "are you alright that cut looks nasty and you're bleeding from the cheek" Kazumi murmured drawing closer to you "trust me I've been through worse" you shudder at the memory of being almost swallowed before looking up at Kazumi "sorry we couldn't save your friend" you murmured softly and his smiled fell for a second "it's fine" he murmured helping you up and you smiled at him in gratitude Tanjiro walked over and offered Kazumi  a scrap of the girls clothing and murmured a few things you didn't care to pay attention to.

Instead you carried on (although with a limp) wondering what your next mission would be, "h-hey wait up" Tanjiro called but you would do no such thing and kept walking forward he eventually caught up to touchign your shoulder gently "hey are you ok-" he started but you cut him off by pointing your nichirn blade at him "don't touch me" you hissed and he raised his hands in surrender "b-but you're hurt pretty badly you should let me help you we're on the same side you know" he said with an awkward laugh, "I don't need your help I'm fine on my own" you hissed pushing him forward and limping forward.

Tanjiro followed behind you quietly before speaking up "you know if you keep forcing yourself you're only gonna hurt yourself more...let me help" he pleaded and you turned to glare at him "what part of I. DON'T. NEED. YOUR. HELP do you not understand?" You hissed but Tanjiro was undeterred "pleas just a little bit here let me" he said scooping you up bridal style and carrying you "so help me if you don't put me down" you hissed squirming in his grasp but his grip was strong "you're in no condition to argue with me, you're injured It would be  a bad idea to aggravate any injuries you may have sustained so I'll take you to a doctors to get you all patched up".

 You hissed at him pushing against his face and chest but he was unbudging "stop talking to me like I'm a damn child I don't need nor do I want your help fuck off" he looked down at you with furrowed brows "I just don't get what's your aversion to help, you know receiving help doesn't make you any less  valuable right? I understand you're a fully capable slayer, actually a lot more than capable than a lot of us but sometimes even the best of us need help and this is one of those times", he said in an air of finality that left little room for argument you simply huffed in annoyance at his  persistence letting out a sigh as you quietly  concede but not without rolling your eyes at the smirk that spread across his lips "wipe that smug smirk off your face I wouldn't be in this position if it wasn't for you're incompetence". Tanjiro laughed awkwardly "yeah sorry about that" he murmured softly and you rolled your eyes "I told you, don't be sorry be better"  you muttered and Tanjiro sighed "okay" he hummed and the two of you walked in a semi peaceful silence

[thedragonagelesbian]

@tuxedo-rabbit replied to your post “head in hands...”:

Oh. I am all about the potential of Cyrus durgetash. Whether platonic or romantic. Excited to see the posts!!

​<33333

my interpretation of their pre-amnesia relationship is, i think, a lot... sweeter than the popular fandom durgetash consensus. the two don't particularly like each other at first-- they respect each other's abilities, which is why they develop a working relationship, but cyrus is so singularly devoted to his father that it makes him an ~utter drip~, which enver 'was enslaved in the hells and thus savors every indulgence of mundane life' gortash cannot fucking stand. eventually, while trying to celebrate some successful early job together, gortash says outright we can't continue on like this if you don't prove capable of enjoying yourself for one solitary moment beyond your fanaticism and drags cyrus to the nearest tavern.

and cyrus does enjoy himself. the crushing guilt comes the next day, but that night, he discovers his love for dancing and gets shitfaced for the first time and feels like he's a real person instead of solely the scion of bhaal, while gortash watches on with amusement-- and with the first stirrings of affection.

that's the core appeal of their relationship for me-- gortash as someone who anchors cyrus' sense of self beyond the urge and his worship of bhaal, and the tension between cyrus' conflicting all-encompassing devotions as evidenced by the prayer for forgiveness. gortash is initially just kind of amused, taking a lot of pleasure in being the one to ~corrupt~ bhaal's dark prince, but as their relationship deepens, his own worship of bane is compromised, giving way to that you are the only exception dynamic. the one person gortash doesn't want to rule over but alongside.

the two had a casual & constant physical intimacy but only slept together once or twice, being a bridge too far for bhaal and cyrus both (i've been playing around with the idea of tying it with bhaal 'gifting' cyrus the slayer form [ostensibly for putting the elder brain plan into motion], but whether the slayer form is punishment for the sex, or the sex is comfort after the transformation [or both...] i haven't decided)

the last (allegedly...) thought i'm rotating in my mind this morning is the idea that gortash could've been the one to save cyrus from bhaal instead of orin, but wasn't. at some point he must have done the calculus and realized that cyrus would forsake his father if gortash asked correctly. that he doesn't, and instead proceeds with the plan they hatched together as normal, is interesting. i think he believed that the plan was the escape-- play along long enough to rule as the Absolute, and then they'd have enough power together to rival the gods, to protect cyrus from bhaal, but not until then.

which adds a certain... (inter)personal desperation to the reunion at gortash's coronation. when he says bhaal isn't done with you yet it's a warning but also a plea. stay in line. stay with me.

[animentality]

I've wanted to do this for a while, but was held back by shyness for a while. (By a while, I mean I haven't even experienced Patch 6 yet. I *believe* this entire experience was in 5.)

I played Dark Urge as my first complete run of Baldur's Gate III, and it was beautiful in a way I don't feel is captured in the normal Tav playthrough, but I only intend to partially unpack that to keep things on topic for Durgetash.

From the very beginning, who you are and what you've lost *burns* as a question in your head. You meet the violation with rage and the promise of bloody consequences, but — it fades. You have people to care for, with varying degrees of suddenness, who understand you and the circumstances that may have shaped you.

And violence and potential death meets them at every turn. I, not the Durge, grew murderously protective of everyone in my party. Astarion. Karlach. Shadowheart.

I killed Alfira and never regretted it, save for wondering if the party would reject me for the barbarity of it all. The butler was delighted, and Astarion wore the reward for my first slip of control for the rest of the game.

If you can't tell, I was already thoroughly invested in feeling this story so much I purposely blurred the lines between myself and the Durge I had for the sake of acting as they would, fighting like I felt best suited them (they were a Storm Sorcery Sorcerer).

By Last Light, I wasn't fond of this unknown observer and their wants. I had no interest in killing Shadowheart, or the town of unknown innocents to "make up" for serving her in what I get in hindsight looked like —to Fel, Orin, and Bhaal alike — another unacceptable fit of perverse sentimentality.

Isabel still died, because I had taken on the fight not yet quite strong enough to save her. Dammon died, as well, and the party and I had to move on. Fel visited that night, and bestowed the form of the Slayer upon me. I was Murder Incarnate, he joyfully proclaimed, and I killed him in the hopes of removing him from my sight. From the camp.

There were letters in rooms I fumbled through in Moonrise, and Gortash started becoming relevant, both in those signatures and through Karlach's sharing of her history.

The vague negativity I felt towards this largely faceless, seemingly largely political threat shattered when infiltrating his palace on the day of the ascension to Archduke of Baldur's Gate turned into an occasion my Durge was *invited to*.

How was I? Did I remember? Would I like to rejoin forces? I can't imagine now how many questions were going through his head, seeing me alive and on my feet after all the time that had passed.

And where Ketheric had acted with rage when I inevitably betrayed him at the top and bottom of Moonrise Towers, or Orin had seethed that my Durge had dared to return and threaten every bit of goodwill she had painstakingly clawed together from the Bhaalists, Enver simply shrugged it off, offering me the first of two chances to ultimately just get their stones and return to rule together with him.

For Karlach's sake, I considered it impossible. I wasn't whoever had orchestrated the plan to enslave the brain.

Somewhere along the way during this campaign, I had seen your posts, but didn't really delve into them or read them too thoroughly since I was trying to not spoil myself by accident. Was that bit of fondness in the throne room that had stayed his hand it? I wasn't going to judge, by any means, because I've certainly shipped things ferociously for much less meaningful gestures, but I didn't understand why it would prompt the intensity with which you fawned over it.

And then I reached the underwater prison. I got lost in the sewers and somehow found the submarine, and the destination was where I had seen Wyll's father rumored to be kept. I had already made the pact with Mizora on his behalf, and didn't really expect to find more than his corpse in the prison after the bombs went off.

But more importantly — I finally understood, in the conversation with Gortash where he demanded I turn back, and looked incredibly unsurprised when I didn't. Somehow, despite my Durge tearing one of his most secure advantages from between his fingers and forcing him to dash it against the ground rather than risking it falling intact into their hands... he seemed *amused. Delighted.*

And so I set to proving myself, somehow wanting to find myself worthy of his approval of my strength, while also wanting to spite Mizora.

I got everybody out, and by happenstance, only Karlach died. His foil, I discovered in hindsight, since she is ready to leap into the House of Hope itself for my Durge the same way they did for Enver once upon a time.

Most of the remaining relevant crumbs dry out here, as Enver didn't even comment on the prison specifically regardless of the outcome for me.

But between "I always liked you better" and the warmth with which he says anything to you, the delight he shamelessly expresses when you simply are being the you that he knows, that is viciously carved into your bones so deeply it will always return no matter how you heal after being broken?

If you look at it as a story of breaking cycles, what Durgetash was should be objectively regarded as the hardest thing to lose in becoming a better person.

It's the intoxication of being known when you are amongst those that know nothing but the use you can offer them. The twisted fun that makes you question, again and again, whether you really *need* to be better than you were. The painful sorrow, of looking on someone you've grown past, and knowing you can't fit yourself in the spaces belonging to who you were then, even with how you still long for that aching, bloody warmth that their harmful presence would make you feel that you'll never forget.

I found myself happy I had had my Durge embrace the title of Murder Incarnate after the process of beating Orin and rejecting Bhaal.

All this to celebrate being able to play the game again after a long move, and that I'm looking forward to Patch 6, where I can hopefully be moved like that again. Made worse? Who knows.

What a delightful journey culminating into the descent into madness that is...Durgetash.

I'm glad you have seen this light...this dark....

You also got me with the line, "If you look at it as a story of breaking cycles, what Durgetash was should be objectively regarded as the hardest thing to lose in becoming a better person."

:D stab stab stab stab stab

[lianobody]

Nezuko starts burning and you and Tanjiro notice it you need to protect your big sister!

While fighting Zohakuten you broke your leg so Tanjiro was faster then you he shielded Nezuko you heard Nezuko’s grunts you felt so bad for her. You saw Tanjiro having a panic attack. You didn’t know what to do you felt hopeless! You rushed to Nezuko to shield her but before you did you saw Tanjiro getting pushed off by Nezuko. You and Tanjiro were both shocked. Tanjiro stared to cry even more rushing to 7th clone while Tanjiro were running you said “Wait Tanjiro let me help you” Tanjiro screamed at you. You were shocked as he never screamed at you “I’M TRYING TO PROTECT NEZUKO AND KILL THE DEMON WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME” he screamed at you. You went dead silent. Tanjiro scoffed and rushed to the the 7th clone (Urami) after Tanjiro killed him and saw Nezuko in the sun and reuniting with Muichiro,Kotetsu and Mitsuri Tanjiro and Nezuko wondered where you were they were scared for you. B-big b-brother w-where I-is [Name]. Tanjiro looked around but couldn’t see you he said to Nezuko maybe she is walking back home? Nezuko nodded smiling. The truth is you ran away crying even with a broken leg. You were so sad Tanjiro your big brother screamed at you. Tanjiro and Nezuko went back home. But they didn’t see you anyway they taught “Maybe they went for a walk?”

It was night time and you still didn’t come back they were so scared and Tanjiro was crying wondering where you are with Nezuko comforting him. You were alone no where to go. Until you saw A guy with black hair and red eyes . He had such a dark presence he said “Your related to Nezuko kamado” Your shocked how does he know your older sister? “You have potential to conquer the sun. I will turn you into a demon and you will get a lot of blood from me” Until it clicked he was Muzan. MUZAN FRICKING KIBUTSUJI. But you weren’t scared you wanted to turn into a demon to kill your siblings. After Muzan turned you into a demon you fainted. When you wake up you have the urge to eat humans you go to a town and see humans there. You give in to your urges and eat all the humans but it didn’t fill your appetite you wanted more. You ate so much humans you unlocked your blood demon art. A week later Tanjiro and Nezuko still have hope for finding you Tanjiro can feel your presence. Muzan came to visit you he was smiling “In a matter of a week your uppermoon level. You will be replacing Hantengu as the new uppermoon 4” you smiled you have potential to kill your siblings.

Tanjiro had a mission in a town a lot of demon slayers disappeared so Tanjiro brought Nezuko there to because he doesn’t want to lose her. When Tanjiro and Nezuko arrived at the town he saw smelled you! He remembers your scent he told Nezuko grabbed her hand and rushed to the forest where he smelled you. But he saw blood covered around you and dead Humans on the ground?” [Name] your bleeding come to us so we can bring you to miss. Shinobu. Nezuko and Tanjiro were smiling until they saw you turned around revealing your demon appearance. That explained the humans on the ground and you bleeding! Nezuko eyes widened and was scared of what you did. Tanjiro asked “N-no [Name] your just playing a prank right? It’s not funny [Name]. You said “Big brother or should I even call you that? Tanjiro your so delusional!” You laughed. Nezuko and Tanjiro saw your eyes seeing the kanji written in it saying Uppermoon 4. Tanjiro can’t believe so can’t Nezuko. All 3 of you get memories at the same time. You were kids all playing together playing tag, you fell and started to cry. Nezuko and Tanjiro rushed to you and started helping you. You started to smile and Nezuko wiped your tears saying “Don’t cry little sister we’re here for you”. The flashback ended. You were mad the flashback came but you missed those happy memories, so you used your blood demon art to attack them. Tanjiro got hit but Nezuko dodged. You laughed “Your both so pathetic”. Nezuko replied saying “We D-don’t want to fight you please turn to a good demon like m-me” You said “I can’t do that I eaten more then 49 humans” But you didn’t realize Tanjiro recovered and was behind you and knocked you out. He said “You will return home” those were the last words you heard until you fainted. Tanjiro carried you home. After a few hours you woke up and you were in a basement you woke up but then you see you hands you tied to a wall and you can use your blood demon art to help you. “Shit where am I” you said. Until the door opened.

Cliff hanger

[nagalias-mindscape]

Been writing something fanficy for Baldur’s Gate 3. Dark Urge Play-through, but the Player and the Urge are two separate entities who share a single body / mind thanks to Orin. It’s been… well, it’s been surprisingly fun. Here’s a scene from the Tiefling Party, featuring only one Tiefling!

Note: Tav is known as Tav, except from when the story takes place from their perspective. Then They refer to Themself without a gender, because They aren’t certain on if They’re singular, a duo or more. The Other is the Urge (the Slayer).

—- —- —-

“You know, Soldier. I look at you and see something… familiar. About you. Do we happen to know each other?” They blinked at the Tiefling woman with an engine for a Heart and thought about it.

The Other had made no mention of any sort of familiarity, but it had also been incredibly quiet since Astarion had taken Their blood during the night. A gentle lullaby to sooth, instead of its usual raging song of war, but only outside of battle- it had roared and roared in Their veins when they began to slaughter Goblins left and right to try and rescue the Druid Halsin. The strangeness in the Other was, without a doubt, affecting Their performance during combat, but so far no one had mentioned it to Their face.

Lae’zel was giving Them looks, however. They did not know how to translate those looks, however.

“I… cannot say for certain.” They eventually settled on, a slight frown twitching at the edges of Their lips. “I remember precious little from my life before the Nautiloid, I’m afraid.”

Which was odd when They stopped to think about it. The Other obviously remembered but refused to tell. What did that make Them- two consciousnesses with different memories occupying the same body. Were They insane?

“Nah, it’s okay, Solider. I get it. Head trauma will do that to a person. You just remind me of a lot of the other Soldiers I fought alongside, back when I was the attack hound of Zariel. That sort of haunted gaze that stares into the distance, both seeing and unseeing. I can’t claim to know what’s wrong, or even if I can help, but I don’t mind being a shoulder to cry on or an ear to listen- metaphorically in one of those cases. You can even use Clive if you want!” Here, the Tiefling woman held up the slightly charred stuffed animal with a very genuine grin. One was that was absolutely conflicting with the amount of carnage they had inflicted upon the Goblin Camp that was threatening the Emerald Grove.

“Thank you, Karlach.” They offered a small smile, as genuine as possible. It was a really generous offer, and one that was incredibly tempting. Someone who had fought in the Blood Wars, and someone who was once a member of a Demon Army… surely she wouldn’t think any less of Them for their mental state, right?

Maybe even know something about… whatever it was that was affecting them- minus the Tadpole, of course.

They would have to give it serious consideration, regardless of what the Other thought of it. They needed answers.

--- ---

The Tiefling party was wild, They had to admit, although they could have done without the alcohol. Still feeling lethargic from the previous night’s feeding, and a combination of not getting enough rest in between all the fighting that had been done during the day left Them in a little bit of mood and in no real desire to be entertaining anyone, and They were pretty certain that They had already accidentally promised Themselves to Astarion for the night- not that They were going to complain if it meant another day where Their urge to destroy Their companions thoroughly wasn’t quite so prominent.

(At least, that’s what They had to assume Lae’zel’s comment was about? Had they promised to spend the night with the Vampire? What even did the Gith Warrior mean with her comments about wondering how she’d be with Them come morning? Surely there was nothing stopping the two of them from spending a night together on a later date- it would be interesting to listen to stories Lae’zel had, but They had the impression that was not something the warrior would be interested in, it also probably wasn’t what she had meant, either.)

(Which, really. What on earth did the woman even mean? It didn’t help that, for all she spoke plainly, she also spoke more riddles than answers for Them- They who were among the only ones who has Their memory scrambled.)

However, Karlach’s offer was still on Their mind, and the more They thought on it- truly dwelled on the thought of confessing about the Other in their head and the urges it was giving Them, the good, the bad, and the downright vile- the more the idea seemed… appealing. The more the mere hope that Karlach would have a solution that- perhaps didn’t cure Them of the Other- but perhaps make it more bearable. Less… prominent in Their mind.

(Workarounds to the visceral urge to tear Their companions apart and bathe in their innards. To use their blood and guts to stitch up Their broken body, and offer… offer… the urge trailed off, no less dangerous, but more fuzzy. Like trying to catch a specific drop of water from an ocean.)

It wasn’t like Karlach was busy anymore, too, having reappeared from whatever meeting she had wandered off to a few hours ago. So, They slipped from Tiefling to Tiefling, slowly making their way to Karlach, and asked if the two could speak about the woman’s offer from earlier in the day.

It took a little for the connection to reach in Karlach’s head, but the woman visibly brightened and nodded her head, moving the two of them off to a more secluded area for their conversation. They were amused to note that Karlach hadn’t been joking about Clive, either, as the plush bear was firmly sat into Their hands as the two of them sat down on the ground, secluded as best as they could be without risking danger by isolation.

“How can I help, Soldier?” Karlach asked, softly. Her infernal engine kept the night air from chilling either of them, and They curled upwards- pushing Their knees upwards to meet Their chest-, crushing Clive in a secure hold between their chest, knees, and face. Sitting down, Karlach was still taller than Them by quite a few heads, and They carefully steered away from that thought because it brought up mental images of using Their companions' literal skulls to measure the exact height difference between the two of them.

“I don’t… really know how to explain this.” They began, softly and uncertain. The trill of the Other was cautious. Ready to strike, worried. Hungry for blood, but still calm- lethargic, really. Not trying to force Them to not talk, which was all the encouragement They needed to continue. “But I think something’s… wrong with me, outside of the Tadpole we all mostly seem to share. It’s… It’s been mostly benign with the activities it’s made me do, but there’s… moments where it’s far worse.”

“Can you explain?” Karlach’s voice was still gentle, still soft. No judgment, no movement. Nothing accusing, and They felt themselves relax.

“I… I don’t know. There’s this voice inside of me. One that existed before the tadpole was put into my head, I’m pretty certain. It doesn’t like the tadpole, regardless. Calls it an intruder, demands it leaves as it was there first.” They closed their eyes, unwilling to gaze upwards at Karlach just yet. Clive, despite the smell of cinders and the stiff burnt fabric, was a comforting presence, and They wondered if Clive served the purpose for Karlach as it was currently serving for Them.

It was a comforting thought. Someone so bright and cheerful, someone so powerful, who had been through so much. Using a stuffed animal to seek comfort. It was the little things that reminded one that even the legends were people, before they became stories. That everyone has their own little demons in their heads- although maybe not quite like Theirs.

(No one else seemed to struggle like Them. Or maybe they were just… better at hiding it.)

“Normally, that voice just says things like… when to move to avoid getting struck by an arrow coming from behind me. Forces me to move when it feels like my legs are petrified. Sometimes it holds conversations with me in very broken Common. However, sometimes… and that sometimes feels like it’s coming on more and more often… that voice inside my head… yearns to spill blood. Violently. It’s already informed me of all the best ways to murder everyone at this party. The easiest would be Gale- he’s a deep sleeper and seems to like me for some reason, which also makes it easier to isolate him, but his condition makes that voice weary. The hardest would be Lae’zel or Astarion. One never sleeps and the other sleeps with their sword at the ready, twitching at the softest of sounds.”

And oh, didn’t that confession hurt. Astarion, who They had begun to enjoy being around and was hoping to use to make the Other inside of him quiet down. Silence it, force its weakness by forcing the physical body into weakness. That They had even begun to think of ways to slay the man… it hurt something deep inside of Them. Something that made Them… uneasy. The Other hated it, trilled a vengeance tune, but was deliriously excited for another night of being fed on. On the other hand, They… They didn’t know how to identify the feeling in the slightest and attempts to even begin made the Other hiss and growl.

They trailed off, not certain if They should mention that thought to Karlach, and the Other trilled something in warning. Something dangerous. Something that made the urge inside of Them to rend and bend and break and tear and spill the guts of everyone at the camp all the worse.

They continued to speak, before Karlach could, using the uneasiness of the Other as motivation to continue. Uncertain of if it was wise to even bother looking up. They had been jolted awake by Astarion looming over them in their sleep- an unknown threat- but Karlach was directly in front of Them. They knew this.

They also knew that the Barbarian Tiefling who fought in the Blood Wars and lived to tell of it would be able to kill them with ease. Sure, Karlach had a soft heart, but she was also aware of the risks that one must take, and where to draw the line. Hopefully, her experiences in a literal war would be enough to protect her long enough to call for help- to have sheer numbers overwhelm Themselves.

“And, if it was just words, I could ignore it. I’m good at ignoring words. But this voice inside my head… it swells with emotions and urges and it all bleeds over in full force. If it wants to murder something, I want to murder something. I can’t ignore that part of it. I’ve almost killed a lot of people at this Camp tonight… I don’t… I don’t know if I can trust myself. Not like everyone else is trusting me to lead us. I can’t… How can I trust myself to not kill all of you… when it’s taking everything I have and then some just to avoid acting on them… I… I’m tired, Karlach, and I don’t know what to do. What’ll happen if I fall asleep one night and just… stop resisting that urge inside me to ravage everything and kill everyone here. The thought of their blood pooling in the ground, their guts on display, bones ready to harvest and… it tempts that voice in my head, makes it eager and trills in ecstasy, and it disgusts me.”

“Well, first things first.” Karlach’s voice was still gentle, soft and warm. However, the was a fond tone of amusement in her voice that forced Them to look upwards at her. The smile on her face was just as a soft and gentle as her voice, and genuine. “Do you want to murder us?”

“Of course not!” They exclaimed, indignant. Had she not listened to anything she had just said?! “I literally just said I’m always fighting the urge to avoid doing that!”

“And it’s an uphill battle, isn’t it?” Karlach’s eyes were full of understanding, and They felt their chest heave and constrict with something unfamiliar. Something tight, nasty, and cold… or was it something light, freeing, and warm? The emotions were bleeding into each other, and They felt themselves grow dizzy. The world was starting to blur, but it was warm. They felt… conflicted, but the trilled tune of the Other wasn’t trying to cleave Their skull into two.

“You’ve done such an amazing job, thus far, Soldier.” Karlach continued, just as gentle. “Battles against enemies that aren’t physically there to punch in the face, yeah? Those are some of the hardest battles of all because you can never tell when they’ll strike, or with what force. Sometimes it feels like you’re making no progress or backsliding by a landslide. Sometimes it feels like there’s no reprieve, and the reprieve you can find feels hollow and false, and Soldier? I want you to look at me and hear what I’m about say next, okay?”

They nodded Their head, breath caught in their throat.

“I am so, so very proud of you. You hear that, Soldier? I’m proud of you. You’re still standing here, and we’re all alive. You haven’t fallen to this voice of yours- its depraved wants it’s trying to force upon yourself. Each moment that statement remains true, is a moment where you’ve triumphed over your enemy. There are few battles more hard-won than those against that which are in your own head.”

They couldn’t help but close their and bury it between their knees, tears threatening to fall freely. Holding tightly onto Clive was a comfort that They knew was keeping Them from attempting to pull out their own hair. Every breath felt like molten lava, and Their body ice-cold despite Karlach’s literal internal fire. Their mind was a buzz with what felt like needles and pins, and the aftershocks of having one of Gale’s thunder-based spells whizz through Them.

“Now, onto the second thing, Soldier. Despite your amnesia, you have a better grasp on this situation than anyone else in our camp. What can we do to help you?” Once more, no judgment in Karlach’s tone. Just gentle almost-understanding, and compassion. What in the world had They done in life to deserve someone like her in Their life?

“I don’t… I don’t know. I want to say tie me up at night with something strong, just so I can try to fall asleep with the knowledge that you all will have warning… should anything happen, and I lose myself. But, that doesn’t… that doesn’t really address the problem, does it?”

“No, but it does give us room to work. Gives us a temporary stop gate, helps buy the rest of us time to search for something to help- if, of course, you don’t mind the others knowing about this.”

“They should… but maybe not tonight, while they’re celebrating. Tomorrow.” They shuddered- They weren’t sure why. They felt both energetic and lethargic. Like They could fight off another army of Goblins, but at the same time the very prospect of continuing to breathe felt like too much. “S-Sorry for distracting-” “Soldier, there is no shame in needing someone to remind you that you aren’t alone. There is no shame in needing to be reminded that you are loved. That you are stronger than you give yourself credit for.”

They didn’t say anything to that, uncertain if there truly was no shame in it but unwilling to contradict Karlach all the same. As far as memory goes- the Tiefling had far more experience with… all this, than They did. Perhaps Karlach was correct- there was no shame in their doubts. Perhaps there was no shame in Their inability to comprehend what was going on in that head of Theirs.

Or, perhaps Karlach was spitting out pretty words and whatever it was she thought They needed to hear.

It was all the same to Them, really. What would They know, regardless?

[fiend-streak]

Anyone interrogated the brain from start of the game? It sings a creepy song :) There was one more but it was a dissapointment. I think this one was Dark Mind.

This is how loss of control over Dark Urge looks like. You get info you lost control for 2 rounds and he can obliterate whole team xD Even after the fight ends he attacks till that debuff goes off. Thank gods he can't kill himself in the process - someone has to ress the others.

I also wanted to play Overwatch today because you know, Hanzo. I saw they gave Widowmaker skin the battle pass - starting skin. Was quite surprised. Thought it gonna be paid one. I'll try to continue Gale Origin tomorrow. Or Astarion. I kinda don't like abandoning my Dark Urge... I feel that Urge within me, I have hard time resisting. Even after I turned Shadowheart into Merxes - a bhaalspawn with access to Slayer even - I feel like I abandoned him and feel bad about it :(

[ashestoshadows]

(Yandere) Pixie x g/n Reader Headcanons

Random note before we begin: I found out through research that Sylveon was actually based on a Chinese myth called "Moon Rabbits," or something along those lines with another character too called Chang'e I think and I suddenly heard this play (the lofi song above) and I thought it suited Sylveon well, so...

⚠️ (Attention please for a moment! There's a small mention of SH so be warned!!) ⚠️

Time for another headcanons list! Except it has to do with one of my own Pokemon, Pixie. (aka my dragon slayer, Sylveon)

He is obsessed with following behind you, almost everywhere but he of course has his limits. He loves the reaction people around him make when he snaps at people for trying to flirt or get all comfy with you, especially on a predatory level.

He enjoys snuggling with you and nuzzling into your chest and hearing your heartbeat

He enjoys comforting you when you get stressed and have panic attacks... His ribbons rubbing soothing patterns into your back as his arms are wrapped around you in a hug, it's just a shame that this almost felt like a false sense of security half the time.

"There, there... See my dear? There's nothing out to get you, because if there is... They'll have to get through me."

He almost always has a small little smile on his face, and it only grows when he's talking about you! Who wouldn't smile when they're talking about the one they love most in the world?

He isn't the kind to hurt you, no... That'd be far too cruel, he is the one who prefers to just lock himself away from you to keep yourself safe as he just goes on a murder spree or just harms himself for even feeling the urge. As a form of punishment

Sure, he can and will murder in cold blood, but he is a real sweetheart. He lets the sweeter side of him show so much more, especially with you, you're the precious treasure he never wants to lose! Not even to himself... The other side of him is much like the dark side of the moon. You never really see it. And it is better if it stays that way for your safety

──────────────── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ────────────────

I tried my best here, that is all I ever really do with these. And I just hope that shines in well and I might do other yandere headcanons and eventually do normal headcanons at some point for my other Pokémon, perhaps I'll do Cerberus next? Who knows! But anyhoo this is Ashes signing off!

[prynnehesters]

i finished my evil durge and im taking a break from bg3 to hopefully get a job/play other games

so like...i did redo the orin battle cuz it gave me failed durge where i didn't get bhaal's blessing and i became a failure and i was basically gonna go feral after my tadpole was removed so i just went "fuck it" and went to kill orin and got his blessing

tbh, having the slayer form made the game infinitely easier but the ending disappointed me

minthara's romance is not that exciting past the insane sex scene you get in act 1. you share some moments, but it's not as satisfying as the other two i fully did. you don't really get full on scenes. picking the origin companions is better. at least w halsin, he is poly and he doesn't feel tacked on in the end. and i did take him a few places. i should've stayed w lae'zel :((( i did get her second romance scene and that was nutso tbh

i ascended astarion and i kind of want to have a split thing in my next playthru bcuz i hear the sex scene is nuts (and you can kick him in the balls). nuts in like, halestorm lyrics lol

i also helped shadowheart w her shar stuff

and then we went to control the brain and i had like 3 summons and was able to clear the overwhelming area no problem and then deal w the brain

you get so many ways to redeem the dark urge and it's wild. like you can be awful and then get rid of your urge like nothing happened. or you can embrace it, then defy bhaal and kill yourself. you take over in bhaal's name. or you destroy the brain and then deal w bhaal, kill yourself, or sentence yourself to prison. you do not see any of the character's 6 months "where are they now". the best you get is a scene of you w orin's weapon making creepy noises and watching from afar, as you're just a monster who craves blood at this point

but like, i think the times you get to redeem durge is like, you don't kill anyone every time you are asked and just deal w orin as yourself (rip)

idk i might play resist durge in the future but im just gonna play my next lil playthru and have my goolock romance astarion and see how that goes lol

i also saw this list of romance from most explicit to most chaste and it made sense but i was kind of surprised by some. i think the order was minthara, halsin, karlach, gale, lae'zel, ascended astarion, shadowheart, astarion, and wyll. and i guess it makes sense if you take it bit by bit

minthara has her one crazy scene and then you just have a few campfire chats (and you only get the crazy scene if you're off the bat evil already and she's also under the influence of the tadpole so uh...)

halsin comes later and it's fun. imo not that crazy. but you get one. and also you can bring him w you to sleep w prostitutes

karlach you get 2 spicy scenes, but that comes after not being able to touch her. which is, well deserved

gale you get one nutso spicy scene (if you choose, it can be subdued if you want to), and then a lot of kisses

lae'zel i know you get her first fighting over who is the dom in the scenario and then you get the fight to the death but it gets tamer after that (which makes sense, as she does warm up to you). you also do have sexcapades with her

shadowheart i've heard it ends in a spicy scene (but like, wyll, wholesome spicy) and if you help her become a dark justiciar your romance kind of...ends

i know astarion starts off spicy with sexcapades and you letting him bite you during sex, but it kind of gets subdued over time bcuz he starts to trust you, until the end where i think you have freaky vampire sex if you let him ascend and less freaky vamp spawn sex if you don't (? dont quote me on that...). but tbh it makes sense w his history :(

and wyll...is wholesome and gentlemanly. he basically just gives you a few kisses and then sleeps w you at the end when he shows you around what he did when he was a kid in baldur's gate. also i've heard marrying him is cute too

idk man if this says anything, im a freak first and foremost lmaoooo (first playthru i slept w lae'zel, gale and the emperor and (almost) haarlep. second playthru i slept w karlach, halsin, the drow prostitutes, mizora (wyll disapproved), astarion briefly, and kissed wyll. evil durge just lae'zel and minthara (although surprisingly...gale tried...again. my second playthru after the druid/tiefling party everyone wanted me except astarion wyll and halsin lmaooo...although i got wyll's second romance scene in act 2 so...)

im too naughty for this lmaoo

[alicelufenia]

I've warmed up to the Bhaal breakup a lot myself since March, for much the same reason, that it felt like an unfinished part of a conversation that concludes with character development for both Durge and Minthara. And even back when it first appeared I never thought it was out of character for her to react negatively, except, like with so many of her lines where she approves of or berates the player or companions for their choices, and when she hates on the gods, the context matters.

You're absolutely right to point out she is in a period of deconversion from a lifetime of faith. Not just faith, but faithful service—whe was originally a Paladin whose Oath was sworn to Lolth (and, depending on your interpretation, might still be, but that's a discussion for another time!) and has just had her whole religion ripped from her within the year. Her favor with Lolth went hand in hand with her status as a Baenre, it was her legacy, her inheritance, taken away due to a moment of weakness.

Then she sees the same thing in Durge: the heir to a powerful entity that reminds her of home. She calls Durge Duk-Tak, Slayer, executioner. A title from her culture she admires, something familiar while lost in the unfamiliar and hostile surface world. Of course she would want Durge to embrace that, and justify it by saying they can handle it because, like her, they're built different. That doesn't mean she's correct, but that is where her desires lie.

And then Durge goes and lets go of that power, that inheritance, willfully, when her own was taken from her against her will? It breaks the narrative she had in her head of how this was going, how she would react if she were offered her old life back. So she lashes out, and it's messy and ugly and hurtful.

I want to point out, part of the disconnect in the fandom over this might be because there's a good chance we have all experienced very different outcomes to the Temple of Bhaal. Most people, especially if they're romancing Minthara, had someone else kidnapped, and so had Minthara by their side the whole time, on the way to the temple, during the fight, and present for the aftermath.

Or, you could be like me, and Minthara was the one kidnapped by Orin. I can personally confirm this can happen even if she is your romantic partner (unlike every other companion, who are all exempt if they're romanced, Minthara can still be taken even if she's currently your partner). Now at the time I was playing as Tav, so it wasn't a one-on-one fight, and I was able to free her mid fight. But if you're playing Durge, she's still shackled to the altar, and can only be freed after you've either accepted or rejected Bhaal (I think, I haven't finished a Dark Urge run myself). This leads to her immediately leaving to camp, like the other of Orin's kidnap victims.

It's only if Minthara was taken, that you can talk to her about how she feels about getting revenge, where you get her mixed feelings reaction, her lamenting how similar she and Orin are, and her super well known "and nobody would remember me" line. THIS is where she acknowledges that Bhaal is no different from Lolth or the Absolute, "they do not have followers, they have victims, and they reward devotion with death."

That is a super important line that I think, a lot of people quote out of context to prove that Minthara should be happy that Durge rejects Bhaal, but look at where it comes up? After she's literally a victim, of Orin, and Bhaal. I think it's fair to say her perspective would change after an experience like that. This is the climax to her character arc, but one that's mutually exclusive (for now at least) with her not being taken. She doesn't have the reason to reflect if she's fighting by Durge's side in the temple of Bhaal, so Durge's rejection stings more.

Now, I admit, my initial reaction to the breakup dialogue was colored by this different experience. As far as I could see, "my" Minthara—the one who just fell into Orin's hands, and possibly had a front seat view of her breakdown and forced transformation into the Slayer as she displeases Bhaal by doubting him, would absolutely not be angry at Durge for choosing to die with their mind intact. Witnessing that whole exchange, it makes sense to me she comes to the conclusion she does in her post-kidnapped dialogue.

That doesn't mean I don't think she would if she weren't a victim. But it would take time. Time in which yes, she would be upset with Durge, but needs time to process not only the loss of their inheritance, but also the fact she nearly lost Durge themselves, and it's only by Wither's intervention that they're alive.

But if there's one thing Minthara is good at emotionally, it's letting the past rest, and look to what she can do with the future in front of her. After all, in this case, Durge WON against Orin, defeated the Slayer form itself. There's millions of ways Durge can prove to her that they're more capable without Bhaal's puppet strings.

So I would LIKE (again, if it's even coming back in patch 7, which, nothing is ever guaranteed with Minthara's content, even if Larian promises it) for there to be a follow up, where you can either confirm the break-up (with good reason, that's toxic as fuck) or to genuinely make up, turning the "breakup" into a lover's spat.

Honestly how many fights do we have between the player and their partners? Not many that don't end in breaking up, but it'd be nice if we did. People fight in relationships, in loving ones, for good reasons or toxic ones, misunderstandings happen, and reconciliation can follow. I'd like it if staying in the relationship and Minthara accepting resisting Durge has the same resonance as victim Minthara's cursing Bhaal's name. Another character arc conclusion that is a "good result", even if it's messy in the moment.

About Minthara's break up dialogue

(TLDR at the end)

My biggest fantasy would be Larian bringing it back reworked in patch 7 because it actively gave her the best reaction to rejecting Bhaal out of the entire party and it's such a good moment to give her more character development.

Tbh, I was never really mad at the dialogue existing in itself. It's just that it felt poorly executed and very incomplete, and it's annoying to think that they just removed it (it was bugged anyway, but you know), when there are multiple ways in which it could have been fixed, depending on if you consider the break up out of character or not.

Take 1: Her reason for breaking up is not OOC.

It's less that I'm mad about the dialogue itself, and more that I'm mad that you, as the player, are forced to stay kinda silent and powerless about it.

You know, I personally see rejecting Bhaal as a matter of regaining agency over your own person and your destiny rather than choosing the "good" path. My durge personally isn't good, and she'd still reject Bhaal to get her freedom back. When you think about it, it should resonate with Minthara due to her backstory with Lolth and the Absolute, but you know, we're all at risk of being hypocritical sometimes, especially in high pressure situation like these, so I don't necessarily see her reaction as being automatically OOC.

But if Larian were/are 100% set on going down that path for her, please at least give the player choices other than downplaying her anger or begging her to stay with you.

Downplaying her anger just feels shitty to me. She's absolutely right about being angry over the situation (for multiple reasons I'll explain in the alternative take). I've seen a few people commenting on my video about the break up on how she should be relieved instead of angry, and like... it's not a Karlach situation, you got resuscitated in front of her eyes by Withers. She would at least be fucking mad at you for doing that whole stunt lol.

Alternatively, begging her to stay with you just doesn't sit right with me. Like, idk, if my SO got mad and broke up with me for wanting to be free from a parent's toxic influence and control over the vague promise of maybe earning something from them but probably not, I'd 100% not want to be with them anymore lol.

Let's not even take her hypocrisy into account, it's not as if something bad would have happened to her if you rejected Bhaal (whereas accepting Bhaal just makes her a convenient breeding machine in his plan, and just sets her up into another abusive relationship where she's always at risk of being discarded anyway) (and you really don't want my opinion on that)

Her anger, when laid out and explained that way, just gives me the impression Durge is getting used to gain status and power, which is even worse considering you get her alurlssrin dialogue 10-15 minutes before the break up, which in turn kinda goes against the fact that her devotion/tenderness/love is a good chunk of her character development and cheapens literally everything surrounding her romance. It basically goes back to "minthara is a drow and therefore evil" and just goes back to unidimensional evil woman concept.

But you know, if they really wanted to punish you for rejecting Bhaal, the least they could do is to let the player call her out on that, or give them the opportunity to say the break up is mutual because what she just said is pretty fucking shitty, especially coming from her. Like, I personally wouldn't want to be with someone who want me to stay stuck in a toxic relationship, and being forced to make that choice is infuriating.

Take 2: Her reason for breaking up is OOC.

Or more accurately, there is more to the dialogue/situation than meets the eyes but Larian just kinda started something without finishing it.

Lots of people consider the dialogue as being OOC because she keeps touting Durge as being the heir of such a powerful god and is mad over the fact that they gave up the power Bhaal promised them, when she is vocally critical about gods and cults many times over the course of the game.

She clearly hates Lolth and the Absolute, calls Lolth's and Bhaal's followers victims. She disapproves of you praying to any god in act 3 (especially Lolth, which gives you -5 approval instead of -1) and will criticize you/your worship if you're a cleric. She encourages Gale to free himself of Mystra (or go against her orders) and assures him he doesn't need her, that gods need you to think you need them, just like the absolute. She says that Shadowheart freeing herself of Shar's influence is at least a bit of comfort after killing her parents, and encourages Shadowheart to get vengeance from Shar when she learns the truth from Aylin. She's outright ectastic when defeating Gortash, because they're "defying divinity" by killing the gods' chosen, and seems kinda, idk, smug? over the fact that so many gods seek the one thing they are in possession of.

However, there are a few moments (other than rejecting Bhaal) where she'll be pissed at you for going against the gods. She chastises Lae'zel if she rejects Vlaakith and calls it a "childish rebellion", and approves of her if she kills Voss instead, because she should know better than to anger a god. She criticize the player/the party (if you play as Shadowheart) for holding Shadowheart back from her destiny directly after sparing Aylin, and will tell Shadowheart that Shar was right for punishing her for it. That's basically the closest equivalent we have to Durge rejecting Bhaal. So like.... It could be because of power after all...?

But when you look into it: Minthara doesn't even hold it that hard against you when Shadowheart gives up power, hell, in every case she never even holds it against Shadowheart at all, going as far as blaming herself for holding Shadowheart back, when playing as her origin. And she just let go of the matter after Shadowheart learns the truth from Aylin, and switches to advising her to seek vengeance.

With the exception of Durge's and Shart's situation, it really boils down to really not wanting to be on some god's bad side. Why would Lae'zel want to screw up their plan when she could just.... shut up and follow the rules? Better tip-toeing around all powerful beings than pissing them off because you heard a *maybe* very real rumor about them.

And that's the thing about Minthara: we're talking about a character who just started their religious deconversion, after spending their whole life, not only as a member, but as a high ranking figure of the cult. And considering Lolth is very real in the setting and is very proactive when it comes to testing and punishing her followers, it's only natural for Minthara to still default to trying not piss off a god. She literally spent 200+ years with no choice BUT to hold herself to Lolth's standard, dedicating her whole being to her, while having to witness other people being punished for crossing Lolth more than a few times. Deconverting is already a hard thing to do, taking years, if not decades, but when you live in a world were divine retribution is a very real thing, I assume it's an even harder thing to do.

You can even add more layers to the situation, or like, go for different interpretations, cause you didn't just piss off a god and gave up the power and status that he promised (even if the bargain is shit and won't end well and will doom everyone, like Minthara isn't planning that far ahead, and she's still convinced it's just something you can just... take control of if you make the effort lol). Add to that the stress of facing Orin and dealing against a big ass cult. The fact that you're romancing her, like, girly already had to kill her first girlfriend against her will, this time she's not even the cause of it but she still can't even do anything against it, and that death looks real fucking painful and she can't even try to make Durge feel better by whispering words of comfort or anything, and she's surrounded by other people, and idk, due to how things are in Menzoberranzan, I don't think she'd let herself be sad in the moment anyway, no matter how deep it cuts. Also, you know, she seems to be pretty preoccupied about her death and mortality in general (due to the fact that her soul will either go back to Lolth, or end up wandering in the fugue plane, I assume), so seeing you not only escape death that easily, but being resuscitated by a fucking god, when she's pretty sure no gods would extend the same grace to her, would probably be pretty upsetting. I know I'd be seething lol

So, to me, having her blowing a fuse because of any of those things would make the whole scolding feel a lot less hard to swallow without dumbing her character down? Hell, even in that case she would still yell at you about how you turned down power. Girly wouldn't let herself be that vulnerable in front of the whole party, so of course she'd blow up over the shallowest reason. You could literally have a follow up dialogue, explaining her reaction and resolving the whole situation. Larian gets to keep the first dialogue, Minthara gets to have character development, and you get more Minthara content and balm for the scolding you got as the player.

TLDR

It's less that it's OOC, and more that the dialogue feels like the start of an unfinished idea.

Minthara is the representation of an emotionally constipated boomer dad who just randomly drops traumatizing lore about themselves while trying to make a joke without even realizing what they went through was trauma. Of course it's gonna sound like angry hot garbage when she's trying to explain herself the first time. Let her think about it for a while and she'll get back to you.

Literally, due to her personal backstory and ongoing deconversion, it wouldn't be that far fetched to say that you telling Bhaal (a god) to go fuck himself (which makes him real angry) because you (his child) don't want to become his chosen (with the powers that comes with it), even if he's the only reason you've been born and becoming his chosen was basically the plan from the start (so it's basically your life's duty), which results in you (Minthara's only person of trust and SO) dying a pretty painful death (it's not the first time she's had to see a lover dying in front of her) just after having killed orin (the whole ordeal being very stressful to Minthara), before being resuscitated (look at you, you're putting her on the worst emotional rollercoaster of her life right now) by Withers (a god, basically) like it was nothing (when no gods would come to her help), would get her at least a little bit angry.

But since there's no follow up on it, it just... sours an event that could lead to great character development if it had been completed and fully implemented.

[winifredsandersonsbitch]

Attempted Breakup (Spike x Reader, BTVS)

Warnings: none

“So what, you just decide the time we shared together doesn’t mean anything? That’s not how it works, love.”

“You don’t get to decide how it works,” you say through gritted teeth. You yank your arm out of his grasp and dart for the street, but he ducks in front of you. 

“As half of this relationship, I think I have some say.” 

“There is no relationship!” You almost scream it, and a couple who had been window shopping cross to the other side of the street. You take a deep breath, square your shoulders, and try again. “Look, Spike, I’m not trying to be the bad guy here.” 

“Damn right.” He leans against the wall and lights a match for his cigarette. “That’s my job.” 

You resist the urge to roll your eyes and push past him. “Spike, I—we—I made a mistake. That’s all.” 

“So now you’re going to pull a Buffy on me? Get all insecure and frigid?” 

“That’s my sister!” 

You shove him hard into the street and then pull him back just as quickly as a truck blazes past, honking angrily. Spike wiggles his eyebrows when he sees how tightly your fingers are gripping the lapels of his jacket, but despite your irritation you have to force yourself to release him. 

“Can’t keep your hands off me, hmm?” 

“If anyone gets to kill you after all this time, it should be Buffy.” 

The walk light switches on and you jog across the street, hoping he’ll get the message and give you some space to sort yourself out. But Spike is nothing if not persistent.

“I was jealous, okay? Everyone else is paired up. Buffy and Riley, Xander and Anya, Willow and Tara. Even Giles has some—” you wrinkle your nose and try not to gag “—special lady friends who come by sometimes. But I should’ve known better than to get involved with a vampire. That’s my sister’s M.O., not mine.” 

“If you wanted to get back at them, all you had to do was ask.” 

“I don’t. It was stupid. I shouldn’t... I need to start hanging out with other people. More normal people. Without boyfriends or girlfriends or... vampires.” You turn to him. “I don’t want to play the part of the broken girl who pushes everyone away, okay? But I’m not myself right now.” 

“Are you going to give me the I-hope-we-can-still-be-friends talk next?” He rolls his eyes. “Get over yourself. I may be dirt, but you’re the one who likes to roll in it.” 

He can think whatever he wants, you tell yourself. It doesn’t matter. This time, it’s over. And it’s for the best! You don’t need some undead asshole hanging around, trying to bring you over to the dark side. Just because your sister is the Slayer doesn’t mean that you’re not special too. You just need some extra support. But you can get it from someone living. Maybe a therapist. 

Yes, you think, a therapist. I’ll just explain how my sister’s destiny as a vampire killing machine makes me feel isolated from others. Then they’ll lock me up in a psych hospital. 

You take a deep breath. Remind yourself that making bad decisions doesn’t make you a bad person. Being with Spike is not indicative of a larger character flaw, or some internal darkness that will be with you for the rest of your life. It was a mistake, but you can atone for it. 

You start by going to church. You’ve never been religious, but hey. Spike (probably) won’t dare to follow you here, and maybe it’ll be good for you to spend some time thinking about a divine power that isn’t evil and doesn’t have the intention of ruining your life. 

Things are going to be different from now on. 

You’re already missing him though, as if that isn’t evidence enough that you’ve become codependent. You glance over your shoulder for him, but he’s gone. Or at least he appears to be. Probably he’s up on the rooftops somewhere, relishing your hesitation in walking away. Why can’t anything be easy with him?

You take the first step forward, then the next. But the next time you turn back, in the middle of the crosswalk, he’s there. He crushes you against him, burying his lips in your hair. 

“It’s a mistake,” you whisper. Your mouth is pressed up against his shirt, the words disappearing in the fabric. Your eyes water. Is this your weakness, as it is Buffy’s? 

If you thought he was going to continue arguing with you, you were wrong. 

“Maybe so,” he says. “But as you well know, I’ve no shame.” 

You kiss the space where his eyebrow splits in two, meticulously sliced to look more punk. You once asked what the running rate was for a singular cut like that; he pretended like he didn’t find it funny. He dances you out of the crosswalk as another car speeds down the street. It’s awkward and graceless. 

“I’m glad.” You stroke his eyebrow like a caterpillar, lightly and with one finger. The skin jumps as he raises them both devilishly. 

“So... Do we get to kiss and make up now?”