#YES i am thinking about the ending montage

[phantomrose96]

(A Breach of Trust)

[I am putting the rest of the ask under a ReadMore because it IS long [and now super-long with my responses added] but I am biting and chewing this ask I am biting everything it has to say I love this ask I have things to say]

But yes responding to this first chunk! First THANK YOU second I loved writing just the inherent comedy of each chapter being like "[Scene 1] Ritsu spitting blood: I have to save my brother. He's dying. [Scene 2] *Happy domestic montage of Mob petting a kitten and maybe drinking some hot chocolate*" It was a great way to keep some emotional balance in each chapter and also. Funny.

I was crawling the wallllls getting to the makeshift reveal. I think it was about 5 years between coming up with it and getting to the reveal. So I just had to bite my tongue and dodge any suspicion in Makeshift's direction leveraged in the ABoT discord (ABoT discord! BTW! If you want)

I ended up making this to channel the energy somewhere

[Rest of ask under the cut!]

i was nervous for a hot second early on (around when reigen first takes mob in) that it was gonna be the kind of story that would get frustrating because "oh if the characters literally just told each other anything it would all be fine" but i didn't end up feeling that way at all? like yeah a lot of the plot relies on characters not knowing things and technically a lot could have been solved if idk all the characters decided to meet up and sit in a circle to politely explain everything to each other but it never feels like that should happen. even besides them all generally having reasons for lying or not explaining things or not talking to each other it's like. all their decisions feel very natural even when they're bad or unreasonable, and also crucially when the characters do learn things or w/e it usually doesn't fix things (ie when reigen learns mob's real identity and tells mob the truth and it kind of fixes some problems but also adds a host of new ones). in general despite it being a story that hinges on all the characters making bad decisions it rarely gets aggravating bc all the choices they make are understandable and make sense for them -- it doesn't feel like anything is happening simply because the plot demands it. everything is constantly getting worse but that's because the characters are making it worse it's not just Happening. and then the characters have to confront and deal with the consequences of all their actions and learn from them and it's very satisfying

YEAH!!! YEAH YOU GET IT!!!!!!

It is VERY important to me that the story in ABoT is character-driven. There should virtually be no "it happened because the plot demanded it." If it happened, it happened because a character's choice caused it. And if a character made a choice, it was due to their own motivations and not because the plot demanded it.

So, YES, there is this scenario where so much of what is happening comes as the result of each character having, at most, a 20% understanding of what's going on. But the withholding of information, CRITICALLY, cannot be because of Idiot Plot reasons.

Reigen "could" just ring up the Kageyama's and send Mob home, cutting short the first like 2/3 of his and Mob's arc. But he doesn't. And not because he's an idiot. He tried. Mob freaked out. And that was a good enough reason to just delay this until tomorrow, surely. But we watch as Reigen gets to experience was feels like genuine accomplishment, genuine joy, genuine meaning, by helping this kid experience life again. From the very start that's what Reigen wanted--to feel like he mattered. At the beginning this is what drives him to take up the Tetsugami case, despite knowing it can get him killed. (Because maybe Reigen can do something, this time. It's not just another doomed marriage or unsolvable missing person. Maybe he can make a difference. Maybe he can matter.)

And it manifests in what looks like heroics, but in the case with Mob, it drives Reigen to stall... more and more. He knows on some fundamental level it's wrong to be keeping Mob this long, but he can justify it in how this IS what Mob wanted.

And the same extends to the other characters... Tetsuo doesn't tell Reigen about Shigeo Kageyama's link to the Mogami case because he can't bear to admit HE was probably Shigeo's captor. Mob keeps secrets about Mogami because Mob knows he "killed" Reigen's "friend." Ritsu withholds information because it's the only power he has, and giving up information allows other people to stop him. Gimcrack and Slipshod keep quiet about Mob's location because their free lunch would end if they told.

And when these characters make bad decisions instead, it is CRITICALLY important to me that those decisions were the organic result of that character's complexes, goals, misunderstandings, and absent information. It's a train wreck and God Dammit I do everything in my power to ensure each character is their own conductor.

and the Themes. okay first of all i am a huge fan of stories that are like "no, heroic sacrifices are Not the answer, please stay alive so you can actually get better and fix your mistakes and be there for the people you care about", so obviously i adored that. i loved reigen confronting ritsu about this and urging him to stay alive, and i'm also obsessed with how reigen immediately Does Not Take His Own Advice. reigen's self-sacrifice plan makes a lot of sense with his character and given the circumstances it's definitely understandable why he and teru would be willing, however reluctantly, to resort to that, but of course it's not that actual solution because that's the whole point. (shout out to mogami being the one to save him. congrats on accidentally doing one (1) good thing.) reigen, ritsu, mob irt to being imprisoned rather than death -- none of them can just sacrifice themselves and expect that to fix everything and everyone to be fine without them, because that's not how this works. (also i can't wait to see ritsu inevitably be pissed at reigen about him trying to do exactly what he talked ritsu out of and reigen having no excuse except "yes i know, i am a hypocrite, please do as i say not as i do.") the story is dark but it's also so full of hope -- you can live, you can heal, you can move forward from all of this, no matter what you've done or what's happened to you.

YES!!! ANOTHER RESOUNDING YES!!!!

I've talked in the ABoT discord about how Reigen's sacrifice didn't work because it couldn't work. Because, if Reigen intentionally killed himself in order to end Mogami too, and Mob was saved and went home, then that means you DO save what you care about by sacrificing yourself. Which would be fine in other stories, but not this one.

ABoT's message has pretty loudly been "you don't save things by sacrificing yourself. you save them by living long enough to fix what you've broken." And even when Reigen is the one SAYING this to Ritsu... he doesn't believe it for himself. And he does not get to get away with not believing it for himself.

In earlier planning stages of the Reigen sacrifice scene, my plan was to have Reigen's knife slip before he could slice his throat (palms sweaty, grip slipped, parallel to what happened in the struggle-for-the-knife in the original chapter 8 Reigen-vs-Tetsugami scene).

But I thought about that and I said "No, actually." If Reigen fails because his palm slips, that suggests this COULD have succeeded, and Reigen just botched it is all.

So instead, the scorching fire around them (the blaze Reigen set) has dehydrated him to the point that his sweating has stopped. He is salty dusty skin and dry lips and his grip on the knife handle is perfect (anti-parallel to the first struggle for the knife scene). His execution is perfect. Reigen sacrifices himself perfectly.

...And then it's Mogami, who is well-practiced at controlling a maimed possessed body, who snatches back control and cauterizes the wound shut. Mogami (the antagonist of this story) cannot be defeated by self-sacrifice.

There is no "if only Reigen did it right" ambiguity. There is an absolute statement about where the themes stand.

(And yes, I'm sure Ritsu will have only positive emotions about what Reigen tried to do once this is made clear to him. :))

one of the other themes i found most interesting was the theme of lies and people trying to act like something they're not, and how that factors in to all the characters' stories. of course mogami is right there (and the parallels between him and reigen in how they both lie to mob for different reasons are super interesting) but i was particularly thinking a lot about reigen, teru, and ritsu and the different sorts of false lives they live -- reigen the con man playing the part of the confident, powerful psychic, constantly lying about his abilities and his accomplishments; teru keeping up the appearance of being totally in control and untouchable, surrounding himself with friends he can't stand and a girlfriend he doesn't care about; ritsu trying to maintain his reputation as the perfect, model student and constructing increasingly elaborate lies to convince his parents that he's doing fine.

i was thinking especially abt the parallels between reigen and teru -- their identities as liars are both emphasized, literally having teru saying "i was lying. i lied to you. i'm a liar" and reigen saying "i lied to you. i've been lying the whole time. i'm a liar" in the same chapter. both of them have grown accustomed to being alone and having a life that's more an expertly crafted facade than anything with substance, but both find in their respective kageyama brothers someone who they genuinely care about -- and they both doom these relationships from the beginning because they can't let go of the facade they're used to keeping up and their desire to feel important/superior. teru continues to be the same smug, uncaring asshole he's designed himself to be even after he starts to see ritsu as a friend, and because of this ritsu remains antagonistic towards and distrusting of him; reigen pretends to be the "21st century's greatest psychic" with mob even when he's starting to care about mob and want him as a permanent fixture in his life, causing things to fall apart when he reveals the truth. they both say the right things to point mob/ritsu in the right direction, but the way they act does the opposite: teru tells ritsu the dangers of what he's doing and reigen tells mob that they should call his family or the police, but at the end of the day, no matter their good intentions, teru likes feeling superior to ritsu and reigen likes having mob depend on him, and so they're not actually going to do anything that would upset that balance. (and, of course, they reassure themselves with the knowledge that it's not their fault, ritsu and mob just won't listen to them! which isn't technically untrue, but nonetheless frames the situation in a way that ignores their own role in it.)

Aaaaaaaaaaaa honestly I don't even think I have anything to add here because your analysis is already so 🤌🤌🤌. They are Liars they are Liars living through a Mask they are Liars who Say one thing and Do another they are Liars who convince themselves this Lie is fine.

all the characters are so good but my favorite has to be ritsu his whole storyline is fantastic. from the start i was enjoying the fic a lot but it was when it started to really get into ritsu's story and his whole deal that i started being like "oh yeah this is the good shit." seeing him go further and further down his self-destructive spiral, constantly digging himself deeper as he hurts himself and the people around him more and more, is so fascinating and painful. and then seeing him get better and start actually wanting to live as he talks to reigen and later teru! and then in the confrontation with mogami when he decides once and for all that he wants to live and remember and try to find a way to fix his mistakes rather than forgetting them or giving in to them! just. he is thirteen years old and he just has all this rage and grief that he's been holding onto and repressing for so long and he finally gets the chance to do something with it, something he can do to find his brother at the low low price of bleeding himself dry, and so he throws himself into that, tearing himself to pieces and not caring who else gets hurt in the process, until he reaches rock bottom, what should be the point of no return -- but it isn't, because teru saves him, because reigen convinces him to try to stay alive, because mob is waiting for him, because he has people who care about him and he's just a desperate, hurting kid and no matter how badly he's fucked up he can still come back from it. just Such a compelling and painful and beautiful character arc

Thank you for stating exactly the reason I loved writing Ritsu's arc so much 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭🥺❤️

When I was about 13, I got really into Naruto and I really liked Sasuke's character. Even seeing him now makes some inner part of me point and go "It's Sasuke!" Brooding, stoic, over-achieving, entrenched in family trauma, is swayed over to the darkside because of the rage and grief he's been sitting on.

And because it's Ninja Fantasy World, Sasuke gets to do this and be really cool the whole time.

Ritsu is... actually just a 13-year-old, with psychic powers which he didn't even want after his brother vanished. He IS smart and he IS a model student and he IS powerful but... he's scared. He's scared, and he's 13. He NEEDS to be smarter than everyone (he's not, and he knows this, and it's scary) and more powerful than everyone (he's not, he knows, he's scared), because he knows that anyone with power over him can control him. And he's at his wit's end being controlled.

So he needs to be COMPLETELY in control and have COMPLETE power. And every instance that proves to him he's actually weak, actually clueless, actually being taken advantage of drives him to panic.

And he finds antagonism on all sides... Teru who loves to pick apart and mock Ritsu for every weakness he has. The spirit horde who eat him within an inch of his life. Isa trying to shut him down. His parents trying to control him.

No one is helping him with his grief... No one is finding his brother... No one is saving him... He does not want to keep living like this. And "no longer living" isn't even an option with how heavily his parents rely on him.

So what does he do. He's so alone. He doesn't have a single soul on his side. Every day is torment. ...And then he has this opportunity that shows up like "if you hurt yourself real bad, kill yourself doing it maybe, you can solve the very thing that ruined your life"

So of course he does it. He grabs onto it like a hot stove or a live wire because he's been wanting to hurt himself, and now he can do it in pursuit of the very thing which will save his brother and fix everything. The risk of dying isn't even a risk. It's an escape. He can do this and he can BECOME more powerful and he can GAIN control and he can USE and MANIPULATE whoever he wants (namely the people who've proven again and again they'll hold him down and force obedience out of him).

Of course he spirals. Of course he hurts people...

And then he finds rock-bottom. Teru chews him out and abandons him. Ritsu flips on Gimcrack and exorcises him out of paranoia (Teru turned on him, Gimcrack probably betrayed him too.) He NEARLY kills Reigen under that same absolute fit of paranoia and fear. ...And then he finds his brother. His brother. Alive.

And grabbing his brother shreds his hand. It does not fix him. It does not save him. It maims him.

And now Ritsu is nothing. Not powerful. Not in control. Not certain. He's someone who just hurts people. He's someone who destroys. He drives everyone away and they're RIGHT to leave him because of how horrible he's been. He can't save his brother, and his brother won't save him. ...So Ritsu wanders back to Reigen. The only person who seems to have a semblance of direction in this whole thing. Broken and beaten, Ritsu joins Reigen because he does not know what else to do.

But there is an up from rock-bottom. As much as Reigen and Ritsu are just The Worst to each other, it's actually that childishness in Reigen that starts to work on Ritsu... This is not a typical adult, using adult-speak and adult-authority to make Ritsu comply. Ritsu can't even fall into his typical masked-up behavior against an adult because Reigen is a fucking nuisance and an irritant and Ritsu, for all his "maturity", riles easily.

This is... really just Some Fucking Guy. A loser, at best. But it's someone Ritsu's brother cared about, and who Ritsu knows gave kindness to Mob where Ritsu couldn't. And it's someone who isn't forcing Ritsu to do anything. Reigen is, in fact, letting Ritsu make these decisions to change on his own. Teru comes back with an apology. Ritsu is staring at the chance to do better, and the chance for some future that doesn't involve killing himself.

And he gets to make that decision against Mogami.

And--here's the thing--Mogami was WITH Ritsu for so much of Ritsu's spiral. He knows what sort of kid Ritsu is. So he "knows" Ritsu will accept what Mogami has to offer...

But when "makeshift" vanished was exactly when Mogami got Mob back, aka exactly when Ritsu went to Reigen. Mogami did not get to see Ritsu's healing. So he got to be blindsided by Ritsu's ultimate decision.

and ritsu's dynamic with teru is just. so good i adored every single scene they had together. first of all they are so fucking funny. they're just these two psychic middle schoolers who both suck so bad and just cannot stop trying to murder each other on the soccer field and i love that for them. ritsu's terrible decision-making reaches new heights every day and teru's just standing there watching him and being right about everything in the most annoying way possible. literally the worsties ever <3

I have, consistently, referred to them as "the two worst middle schoolers ever". Like "you're a horde ghost and you're stuck doing the bidding of the two worst middle schoolers ever."

With huge consistency, the scenes I find funniest end up being Ritsu Teru scenes. Because they are, in fact, The Worst.

but more importantly on a serious note i am obsessed with the complicated mess that is their relationship and the way it and the reader's perception of it change as the story goes on. when they first meet things are seemingly pretty straightforward (mostly. i have thoughts which i will talk abt in a second): teru is the one causing the conflict between them by being shitty, and ritsu's just responding to it relatively reasonably. ritsu's the protagonist, the good guy, whereas teru is a morally gray asshole. them working together is a matter of necessity, with ritsu only going along with it because he needs teru's skill and power on his side and teru presumably having his own secret, self-serving motivations. standard stuff; we all know how this goes.

except then the story keeps going, and it gradually becomes apparent that things are far from this simple. it slowly becomes clear that despite teru's arrogance and callousness, he does have ethical standards and lines he won't cross -- whereas ritsu gets more and more unfettered as time goes on. it also gradually becomes obvious that teru does genuinely care about ritsu and see him as a friend (probably the closest thing to a genuine friend teru has), even if teru himself is pretty shitty at being a friend -- leading to the incredibly striking moment when ritsu himself realizes this, and his main takeaway is just that he has power over teru. by the time they have their second soccer field fight, teru has proven himself the more morally upstanding one, which is pretty wild considering the first thing we ever see him do is beat the shit out of a near-defenseless thirteen-year-old for annoying him. of course, he still isn't supposed to be fully in the right -- one thing i really appreciated about the story in general was that the conflicts between characters are rarely as simple as "this character was Right and this one was Wrong," but rather a matter of all the characters making mistakes at one time or another and then having to deal with the consequences and make amends. ritsu and teru's relationship is a prime example of that with how "ritsu made his own decisions and those decisions were Very Bad" and "teru treated ritsu poorly and never actually did the work to make himself someone ritsu could actually trust or would want to listen to" are facts that coexist and both get addressed. the second fight is a masterpiece of a scene in basically every way, but one of my favorite aspects is how teru is desperately trying to reach out to ritsu but is hit with the truth that it's too late for that, that he should have been doing this the whole time, that all this is partially his fault. and in this scene, he fully accepts that, gives in and decides that ritsu is right: it's too late to make amends, it's too late to save ritsu. but it doesn't end there, because this is not a story in which things are simply unfixable, and so instead teru comes back, decides to make the hard choice and try to fix things instead of turning his back on ritsu for good. during the fight, teru says he wants to help ritsu, to sacrifice for him, and ritsu scoffs at him and rejects the idea -- but then teru actually does it. he puts his money where his mouth is and reaches out to ritsu and offers his own psychic energy to save ritsu's life, along with apologizing to him and offering his help to find mob. like i dunno what else to say that's not just summarizing every scene they have together but god i love their dynamic and its arc. i really hope they manage to become actual friends now because god knows they could both use more (read: any) of those. the text exchange they have at the end of the most recent chapter is delightful i love that they bond by insulting reigen i think that's great for them.

Yes yes yes yesssss. It definitely felt like the most ambitious thing early on in ABoT, where I had early-story Ritsu and early-story Teru, and I wanted, somehow, to pull off "they basically swap moral grounds by their second fight."

It's easy enough to just SAY "Ritsu spirals and does progressively worse things. Teru starts to take objection to these more and more until he's the one who thinks this whole thing has gone too far."

And, harkening back to earlier, this kind of plotline has to be deeply rooted in their characters. There is no "Ritsu becomes evil just because" and there is no "Teru becomes good just because."

So they needed to be consistent in their own characters, but evolving under the pressures of the story. Ritsu I talked a lot about early up, how deeply he fears not having control, how much repressed frustration he has over the ways everyone in his life has failed him. And he's never allowed to speak up, or god forbid lash out, because it is his JOB to be the surviving child. Perfect, mature, composed.

Ritsu takes this WILD leap into something insanely dangerous which he has no understanding of, nor power in. Teru IS his first big painful wake-up call with how summarily Teru curbstomps him. Ritsu goes home desperately wanting to quit.

He pushes through it, afraid and knowing he has so little power and control. Then there's Teru, exacerbating this. Because he loves to point out how weak, clueless, and not in control Ritsu is. He jabs and he teases and he chews Ritsu out and he knocks Ritsu down because Teru cannot pass up the chance to prove he's better.

So... of course Ritsu eats up the first opportunity he's given to improve his power over Teru. Gimcrack offers to train him--Gimcrack who's far more supportive of Ritsu than Teru ever is--so of course Ritsu accepts. Every single tick of power in Ritsu's direction is security. And Ritsu is consistently rewarded. He learns to manipulate, and it rewards him with control. He pushes Teru away and it rewards him with independence. He lets the whole horde possess him and it rewards him with power.

And then there's Mezato in all this, threatening to rip away his control. But he can beat that out easily with possession. And if he possesses people, why should he care? Possession feels nice, to him. That's not even a fraction of a fraction of the pain he's been through. He can do this to other people, because possession is POWER.

And, ahhh, possession was such a great thematic vehicle to spin the Ritsu-Teru face-heel-heel-face turn around.

The first cracks we see in Teru's demeanor are all, subtly or not, around possession. When Ritsu almost blasts the possessed woman (Ritsu, panicked, uncertain how to handle things) Teru tackles him and screams at him. (Killing a possessed woman? Teru oh Teru why might that terrify you?)

So Teru DOES have morals. He does have limits. But of course, his first exercise of this is tackling and SCREAMING at Ritsu for fucking up. Just another tick mark in Ritsu's check list of feeling powerless and antagonized.

And the next time, when Ritsu offhandedly mentions he's had his parents possessed for the night while he and Teru were at the meat warehouse... well it's out of focus, since Ritsu is our POV character and he doesn't notice, but Teru freezes. Teru questions this. Teru, instead of letting Gimcrack phase him through the wall (and he was resistant to letting Gimcrack touch him to phase him in in the first place) Teru instead blasts a hole through the warehouse wall.

But... Teru has a plan. When Isa catches Ritsu in the call center, Teru confiscates Ritsu's spirits and (behind his back) blackmails them into never accepting a command from Ritsu to possess someone. (Teru is also a control-freak, and rather than try to talk to Ritsu directly about not possessing people, he just uses manipulation and threats to make it happen).

So now, Teru can relax, surely :). He invites Ritsu along for the movie. He's mocking and insufferable and cruel to Ritsu but, hey :), that's just Teru proving his place in the hierarchy. He... actually does want Ritsu there. He actually does help Ritsu (cauterizes his wound without asking). (It's still power-plays. Still power-plays all the way down which Ritsu hates.)

And Teru... incorrectly... starts to entertain this idea that Ritsu also thinks what they have is friendship. And after the ice cream thing, is when Ritsu leans into Gimcrack's offer to learn how to start being manipulative like Teru is.

So Teru notices NOTHING is wrong for a long time, because now Ritsu is faking it. He doesn't notice until it is much too late. And, frankly, it was ALWAYS too late for Teru to take the moral high road. And some part of Teru realizes this because what he sees in Ritsu, he realizes, is what it looked like to watch Teru from the outside. Teru was ALLOWED to be manipulative and horrible because Teru, himself, always knew he would stop before crossing a real moral line. (Not that Ritsu knew this.) And now he's staring at Ritsu, a true threat who won't listen to reason and who CANNOT reliably be expected to back down before a line is crossed.

And... to THROW this in Teru's face in the FORM of Ritsu letting every spirit from his own horde possess Ritsu during the fight, giving Ritsu the upper hand.

I always knew, for this second fight, the tables would need to be a lot more evenly matched, with Ritsu coming out ahead more often than not. But I also don't like "some character is morally questionable now, and for some reason that's made them stronger than the master character who pulverized them earlier."

But POSSESSION. The motif that all this conflict is hanging upon, used as a boon on Ritsu's side to smash Teru into the ground, to physically and MENTALLY rattle him to the point that he's lagging on Ritsu's attacks and incapable of subduing Ritsu until Teru puts aside his psychic powers all together...

AND JUST... Teru all the while being forced to realize he IS not blameless in this. That every horrible, callous remark he made to Ritsu was not directing Ritsu to the right path or proving himself cool and powerful. They were all instead only cementing Ritsu's hatred of him.

And Teru does not want to accept this at first. He wants to think he did the right thing, ultimately, and it was RITSU who rejected him. And this is where the scene with Slipshod comes into play. Slipshod, who is shown again and again being good at pressing people's buttons. Slipshod is the one bully bigger than Teru in all this, and behind his dumb demeanor is he really really good at knowing how to get a rise out of people. He does it to Reigen while possessing Mezato. He does it to Ritsu while possessing his mother. And he does it to Teru, for fun, because he loves to rub Teru's face in the mess he created.

Which, on the plus side, was the wake up call Teru needed to recognize how consistently horrible HE had been. How much of Ritsu's spiral (and now, imminent death) happened because Teru gleefully pushed him toward it.

Teru's one and only friend.

After Teru swore off friends and loved ones, because they can be used to hurt him.

So it is a big moment, and a big decision Teru makes, when he chooses Ritsu. chooses apologizing. chooses making himself vulnerable (VERY LITERALLY, with how the power transfusion drains Teru to nothing). Teru chooses to care.

And ultimately, it's not even that Teru went from the bad moralless one, to the moral one. He always had these morals. He had these uncrossable lines since day one. But he hid it behind his horrible antagonistic demeanor and the cracks did not come through until he realized he lost control of Ritsu. Teru's ACTUAL heel-face turn comes in him realizing how awful his demeanor was and making amends for that.

i'm actually not done talking about them though because it's finally time for that tangent about teru and ritsu's first fight on the soccer field now because i just reread it while writing that last section and it's so interesting actually. like okay, like i said before it does set teru up as the problem -- in that scene teru is very much the aggressor; he's being a complete asshole for no goddamn reason, with absolutely no compunctions about beating the crap out of some random kid, and ritsu is the scrappy underdog determined to fight back despite not really having the means to. but then there are the moments hinting at more complexity to teru -- him literally stopping the fight to teach ritsu to use his barrier, giving ritsu the makeup after the fight, and of course his decision to spare ritsu in the end. and then on ritsu's side, he almost actually kills teru -- the only reason he doesn't is that teru manages to break free. (awful awful au idea: ritsu actually does kill teru here. would that be fucked up or what) something that stood out to me when rereading it is that despite teru repeatedly saying he'll kill ritsu, and ritsu's internal monologue being very convinced that he's in mortal danger, teru's reaction to ritsu actually almost killing him -- "you really are trying to kill me. we're done", etc -- seems to imply that his threats were more him just talking a big game, expecting ritsu to give in and surrender eventually, and he didn't actually intend to kill him until ritsu gave him an actual reason to. especially interesting to me is the bit where teru asks ritsu if he really meant to kill him, because ritsu's narration and teru's actual actions are kind of at odds -- ritsu tells teru he meant to do it because he thinks him scaring teru is what's making teru hesitate, and that he needs to make teru think he's dangerous in order to get him to leave ritsu alone, but teru's actual response is the opposite, attacking ritsu more fiercely because "there's no reason for [him] to hold back". in general the scene very cleverly sets up the core difference between them: teru is pretty awful but does have firm moral standards, whereas ritsu is desperate and willing to do just about anything if he thinks it's the only option. also the parallels and contrasts with the second soccer field scene are excellent -- the role reversal with the strangling but also how when ritsu does it both the initial act of starting to strangle teru and the fact that he doesn't end up killing teru are both unintentional on ritsu's part, but when teru does it it's a very intentional choice both to do it and to not go through with it; "we're done" said by teru the first time when he's preparing to kill ritsu and then the second time after he's decided not to. have i mentioned that this fic is good because this fic is good. i'm running out of ways to say that

YES!!!!!! ANOTHER RESOUNDING YESYES YES.

I have slightly pre-emptively answered this question by mentioning it above but Teru demonstrates this hypocritical "rules for thee but not for me" because, internally, Teru knows HE will always stop before the line is crossed.

BUT RITSU DOES NOT KNOW THIS. THERE IS NO REASONABLE EXPECTATION FOR RITSU TO KNOW THIS.

So Ritsu, and we the audience, do NOT know this during the first soccer fight. Teru is going to kill Ritsu is a very reasonable conclusion to draw from the way Teru goes all out on Ritsu. Ritsu is terrified. Out of his depth. He's panicking. This kid is going to kill me and he has every reason to believe it.

We don't know, unless (like you) you look at the smaller details, that Teru is not intending to kill Ritsu. He's talking big. He's trying to force submission in Ritsu. He's not trying to kill.

But Ritsu does go for the kill. Because it is the single break he gets and it's perhaps his only chance to survive (he thinks), and he does, IN FACT go for the kill.

Teru breaks free and he does... even give Ritsu the chance to clarify if that was an intended kill-shot. Teru is giving the chance for Ritsu to essentially say "Sorry, accident, don't escalate to trying to kill me." But Ritsu misreads the room, like you point out, and this is when Teru gets serious.

Strangulation, in the first fight and in the last fight. Exactly as you say. Accidental, by Ritsu, the first time, and accidental in letting Teru live. Intentional, by Teru, the second time, and intentional in letting Ritsu live.

"WE'RE DONE" ECHOED. TWICE. In their first fight and their last. With entirely different meanings.

okay those were my big points but i also had a bunch of smaller thoughts so here's just. a list: - i just think it's really funny that teru saves ritsu by punching him in the chest with psychic power on not one but two occasions. literally their dynamic in a nutshell. (also. the way during the time at the mall ritsu responds by being like "did you cauterize me" really gets to me for some reason. he sounds so offended. like you can't just cauterize someone's wound maybe he liked bleeding all over the place you don't know!) (actually wait that thought is also very funny considering what happens with mogami and reigen later. you really can't just cauterize someone's wounds that's very rude. they worked hard to be that grievously injured) - okay so the burger scene. first of all generally a great scene second of all obviously it's a parallel to the scene with mob and the milk (reigen saying "have mine too" and all that) but also i love the parallels to the scene with isa in the coffee shop (also a great scene btw. have i mentioned this fic is good). they're both scenes in which ritsu has a loud emotional breakdown in a public restaurant (love that that happens twice. ritsu honey can you maybe not) with a major focus on ritsu's insistence on letting himself suffer and refusing any kindness he's shown, but they show ritsu at very different points in his story and have very different outcomes -- isa can't manage to get through to ritsu, but reigen can. ritsu refuses the croissant till the end, but he eats the burger. (sorry to add another side note but i love that that was a very serious sentence i just typed about a very emotional character arc.) also the symbolism in the fact that in the coffee shop scene, ritsu's explosion of psychic powers freezes and then spills his hot chocolate, rendering it undrinkable, but then in the burger scene when he blows up the ceiling the dust explicitly doesn't get on the food, so he can still eat it. good shit - i'm trying to avoid going through every single line or joke i liked one by one but i will say. the "this--" "reigen." "reigen" jokes were both incredibly funny on their own but the fact that they're like 30 chapters apart is what really kills me. the dedication. i saw the second one and was thinking "didn't that joke happen before. when was that. wait was that literally all the way back with tetsuo". countless plot events and several irl years may pass but reigen will never catch a break - the "FUCK OFF" tag reigen made being the one that they exorcise mogami with. perfect - love that ritsu is indirectly responsible for teru's girlfriend breaking up with him (good for mei honestly. sure teru wasn't actually cheating but his ass deserved to get dumped) and i like to imagine that teru never lets this fact go. he's not particularly upset about the breakup but he WILL bring up that ritsu ruined his relationship at every possible opportunity purely to annoy him

I THINK YOU MAY PERHAPS BE THE FIRST PERSON TO RECOGNIZE THE DOUBLE-CAUTERIZATION, and the intentional joke in Ritsu, the first time, declaring "Don’t… perform psychic medical procedures on me without my permission, okay?!" Like sorry bud, this is not the last unauthorized psychic medical cauterization Teru's gonna perform on you.

But not every unauthorized medical cauterization can be a win. Turns out when Mogami does it it's kinda mean >:(. But also necessary, for a not-dead Reigen, so actually thanks Mogami.

ABSOLUTELY THE "HAVE MINE TOO" INTENTIONAL PARALLEL BETWEEN THE MILK SCENE AND THE BURGER SCENE. I'm always glad when someone notices the repeat phrasing that ends both those scenes.

And aaghhhhh I could write a whole other essay about the symbolism that food plays with Ritsu's plotline, but in the smallest nutshell how it tends to represent someone reaching out with care and how often Ritsu rejects it. One public restaurant psychic outburst rendered the offered food unconsumable and the other one intentionally points out the way the food (burger) avoided the destruction :')

THANK YOU YES. "This--" "Reigen." "Reigen." as a repeat joke tickles me so much. Just Some Guy energy. Could've played the most pivotal role all night but he'll still end up somewhere next day where someone needs to figure out who he is. Reigen is here too, btw. His name is Reigen, btw.

Fuck Off tag was delightful... It started as an inside joke for a very early comic that @sandflakedraws drew (and then later redrew), of the (chapter 5 or 6) Reigen Tetsugami confrontation. The ineffective tag Reigen sticks to Tetsugami's cheek has, in katakana, "fuck off" written on it. Hilarious enough joke for me, years later, to incorporate it into the story.

Re: the girlfriend thing. I've joked before "if I had a nickel every time evil spirit possession was mistaken for an affair in ABoT I'd have 2 nickels. Which isn't a lot but it's weird it happened twice." But yeah, Ritsu, you asshole. You cost your bro his girlfriend.

i could just keep going but at this rate i'm going to be going back through the entire fic and just talking about every single scene so i should probably stop before this gets any longer. basically what i wanna say though is that the fic was very good, thank you for writing it, it has given me brainworms. once again i am so sorry for the length of this ask

THANK YOU!!! I think I just spent like 2 hours writing this response because, as you can see, I REALLY LIKE talking about this stuff haha!!

[canastadisastrous]

You know what? The xmen film franchise isn’t perfect. Xmen will never be perfect. But I’m glad that it exists.

There’s something so specifically heartwarming/gut wrenching about watching the new Deadpool and Wolverine film, and seeing all of these discarded characters given another chance. We never would have gotten any of that without the shit show that was Fox’s Xmen films, and I’m happy that I got to sit through shit films like Apocalypse and Origins: Wolverine just to have glowing moments like the og sabertooth actor taking action one more time. The scrapped Gambit film became a beautiful cameo for Channing Tatum and it couldn’t have been better

I’m glad that every deadpool film lead to this, because no other character could have bridged this into the MCU in this way. I’m happy that the MCU exists, even if I don’t follow it much nowadays, because without it I would not have gotten to see yellow suit wolverine on the big screen. Thank you Hugh Jackman for coming back (even if Disney‘s gonna make you do it until you’re 90) thank you Ryan Reynolds, Channing Tatum, Jennifer Garner, Wesley Snipes, Dafne Keen, thank you to everyone involved in the making of a film which was more of a celebration of the X-Men and the insane, broken, but beautiful history they have. Thank you to every actor who ever played an X-Men character ever. Thank you to both Jubilees from different timelines even though it made absolutely no sense

Thank you for existing, X-Men franchise

[brainrotzora]

these things are always happening to the ones i like :////////

anyways the lighting in this dungeon is so nice

didn't get any good pics bc i was too busy dungeoning but so pretty...best dungeon music so far goes to snowcloak though btw

[bluetimeombre]

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐋𝐚𝐝𝐲𝐩𝐨𝐨L 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐖𝐨𝐥𝐯𝐢e

Deadpool and Wolverine but your lady pool and an absolute SLUT for Wolverine.

[this is a complete self insert with just everything I was thinking about during the movie and since then I’ve watched it three times. It gets better every time. Snippets of the movie, will probably do a part two. SPOILERS!]

part two

Warning/disclaimer: femreaderxwolverine, sexual content, sexual language, offensive language, just being a whore the man, cursing, repeat daddy issues, never proof-read.

After digging up Logan and expecting to find a shirtless and oiled-up Hugh Jackman, you were a little more than disappointed to find the bones and metal. 'Damn it! Shit! Fuck! They Les Mis'd him!'

Eventually, you settled down next to the remains, against the same log that had impaled him. 'That was weird,' you chuckled. 'I'm much calmer now. Look, I'm not a woman in stem but you seem incredibly dead to me. Oh, you sexy lump of bones and metal. I would have let you slide them into me any day.'

'But it's good to see you,' you pat his knee. 'I gotta be honest, I've always wanted to ride you, Logan. Oh, whoops, I meant with you. Ha! Who am I kidding, no I didn't. Just you and me, getting into it. And I mean into it. Every style. Doggy. Sixty-nine. On the kitchen counter to the bathroom. Till my back broke. Yea, we'd have been good together.' You ranted, fantasies flying across your mind too quick to focus on one.

With your red-gloved hand, you jerk the chin. 'G'day mate, there's nothing that'll bring me back to life faster than a big bag of Marvel cash. Ha- I hear you, Hugh. But no, no, no, no you had to go and get all noble and die for real. I could really use your help right now. And a massage. Your big manly hands just rubbing all over me-'

Just as you were about to go into further detail about what you want him to do to you, the sound of portals opening and heavy boots stomping closer alerted you.

Quickly, you pulled the skeleton down on top of you.

'There are two hundred and six bones in the body. Two hundred and seven if i'm watching Van Helsing.'

Que the fucking montage.

You have a mission. Find a Logan to take back with you. First up you end up in a bar, catching an axe as it was thrown at you. 'Logan! I'm gonna need you to come with me.'

The Logan sitting at the bar slowly turned to you. 'Who's asking? ' He slipped from the bar stool to reveal a 5'3 Logan.

You coo. 'Well, who's this little ankle biter. Did you stick the landing little guy? Yes you did, comic-accurate short king. Such a cute little Wolvie.'

The little guy started stalking toward you.

'Que the fucking montage.'

You found a Wolverine for the seventies, or eighties, something close enough to that, one hand missing. 'Oh yea, sexy, you have anchor being written all over you.'

You found patch Logan. 'Oh hello, Patch. Should've worn my white suit.'

You found another old man Logan, sitting solemnly on his front porch. 'Howdy! Oh, I see, you're the daddy issues one. Good to see god has answered my prayers. So soldier, do I need to be a bad girl so you put me over your knee, daddy?'

Another was tied to a cross with red bloody skulls acting as a floor.

One was dressed in a tight yellow and brown suit, walking through the woods. 'Hubba hubba. Classic! Now, you fought the Hulk in this suit, right?' as he snicked his claws out, the green of the beast reflected from behind you. 'I am Marvel Jesus you dull creature and I will not be-'

One, your favourite, was working on a bike in a tight white vest and dark pants. You drooled. 'That's the whole goddamn package right there. You know from behind you look a bit- holy Shit!' he turned, and everything about him was Wolverine. Except for the fact he was Henry fucking Cavil. 'The Cavalry has arrived. The prophecy has been fulfilled. Can I say, sir, sorry, daddy- on behalf of all of humanity, this just feels right! We will treat you so much better than those shit fucks down the street!'

He took the cigar from his mouth, stalking to you. You had never been so aroused in your life. 'You were just leaving'

Giggling and twirling your hair, you hold a hand out, ghosting over his chest. 'Can I just, one- one touch. Oh my god! You're like Superman or something.'

He punched you right into the Logan you needed. Thank you Cavil.

'You two gonna fuck or fight?' asked the bartender. 'Both if i'm lucky,' you said.'

'Oh look at those sexy little jammies, that only took twenty fucking years!'

The trash heap was the last place you wanted to end up, but when you woke to Logan looming over you, a snarl on his face, you sighed in relief.

'Well, hello sexiest man alive, 2008. Wanna give me a hand? Or head?'

He sniked his claws out.

'Kinky! That's new for Disney!'

He dug his claws into your ribs and dragged you up with them. 'Where the fuck are we?'

'I dunno, but it looks a bit mad maxxy to me. But that would be IP infringement right?'

'Fucking jokes,' Logan uttered. He threw you over his leg, your back breaking.

'Till my back breaks, Wolvie!' you yelled out, quickly rolling yourself back up and shaking it off. 'Look, I think we got off on the wrong foot. I'm a big fan. How about we strip off our suits, take a tumble in the sand, get to know one another you know. Personally, I'm more of a cowgirl fan but I'm willing to do whatever you want baby.'

'You're unbelievable,' he grumbled. It was still sexy. He turned his back to you.

'Oh, I see, is that what you did when your world went to shit!'

He paused, his head slowly turning to you. 'Say again, bub?'

'Oh, I am so horny right now.'

The two of you engaged in a fight, and not the sexy stradling fight that would happen later, but the guns firing, swords slashing kind of fight. that was only interrupted by a familiar voice.

The only other voice that could have you dropping your panties as quick as Wolverine. He was hooded, hidden, but you knew him from your sex dreams.

'Dear god almighty, it's him.'

'Who?' growled Logan.

'Don't be jealous baby, I have two holes for a reason. Don't worry gorgeous, you're gonna encounter some delicate language, a smidge of ass play but we've been prohibited from using cocaine, at least on page.'

He raised a hand. 'They're coming.'

'Who's they?'

The three of you watch cars and trucks drive through the waste, keeping you trapped. There were familiar faces, Pyro, Toad. And Sabertooth.

The mysterious figure jumped down and mastered the superhero landing that had you clapping your hands and jumping up and down.

'Oh my god! Oh my god!' you held onto Logan's shoulder as you jumped while he just glared at you.

'I've got this,' the man takes down his hood, showing the beautiful, hot, strong, handsome, hubba-hubba worthy, Chris Evans.

'Oh yes, you do sexiest man alive, 2022!' you cheer.

'Stay close,' Chris- or Steve- called back to you.

You stalk over to him. 'Aye aye, Captain.' you wrap your arms around his stomach, fingers trailing over his abs. He removes you and you groan, sulking. You walk back to Wolverine and jump onto the side of his hip.

Instinctively he holds your ass which makes you giddy before he realises his mistake and drops you.

'You're not gonna love what happens next,' shouted the captain.

Your jaw dropped from behind the mask. 'Holy shit, omg! No way, he's gonna say it! He's gonna say it!' you flick one of your swords that was still poking out of Wolverine's chest. 'Avengers-'

'Flame on!' Steve- no, Johnny- yelled and took to the skies in a ball of fire.

It was sort of stupid in hind sight as Pyro lifted a hand and extinguished him, causing him to fall from the skies and go crotch first into a billboard.

'No!' you screamed, rushing to him and rolling onto his back to get a look at him. 'No, no baby, stay with me. Let me take a look!' you tried to pull down his pants but Logan literally pulled you off him.

You were tied up with Wolverine on the front side of you and Johnny on the back. When you woke, you giggled. 'Woah, just like my dreams.'

Johnny woke to, lifting his head from your shoulder. 'How long was I out?'

You smirk under the mask, looking back to him. 'Not all of you was asleep, say Cap, is that a Glock in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

'Is that Chuck? Hey Chuck, over here! Hope it's you young, god, we got James Macovy in this?' you yelled as a wheelchair rolled out as you entered the thing that was apparently large Paul Rudd.

'Cassandra Nova. Charles's twin,' the villain introduced herself.

'Holy shit,' said Logan.

'How was anal birth?' you asked.

Cassandra smirked. 'You two are cute. I have a good feeling about this.'

'Right!' you cheered. 'Just wait till this ends, the smut is off the charts!'

She took the chain from around the two of you but you wrapped yourself around Logan's arm, he only grunted at you. He only pushed you off when you started to go off and off about what Johnny said about Cassandra. 'People think i'm a shit talker but this guy-' you chef's kiss. 'Next level!'

Cassandra, with a flick of her hand, shed the skin from him as he fell in a heap of bones and blood and skin,

You cried out, holding onto Logan for dear life. 'My favourite Chris!'

'You silly little bitch, you just got him fucking killed!' yelled Logan.

'Fine, spank me then! P.S. Do you know what he was doing to the budget!'

You were brought to Ultimatum with Cassadra, Oliath or the other British villain, but all you wanted was to save your world, bang Wolvy and go home.

'I didn't want it to come to this, either you help us or my boyfriend here is gonna perform the whole of Greatest Showman as a one-man show,' you warn.

'I'm not her boyfriend,' Logan grumbled.

Cassandra went on a trauma dump that had you groaning. 'Couldn't you just turn into accomplishment like the rest of us?'

But I'm not like the rest of you, except maybe the Wolverine, now we could be truly terrifying together.'

'Sorry lady, he's taken!'

'Not for long,' Cassandra smirked and as Logan attacked, she sent him in the ground and away from you. You only whined at his disappearance, a whine that turned into a groan when Cassandra's fingers entered you in the worst way possible. Through your head.

'What can I see here?' she asked. Cassandra gasped. 'Oh, you are a whore.'

Oh yes, she saw the million filthy things you wanted to do to Logan.

The two of you made it out and to the diner where Logan was intent on finding food and taking rubbing alcohol shots. When he sat across from you, chucking a tin of spam at you, you pulled of your mask.

Logan stilled, looking at you with finally something a little different than anger.

'What?' you asked.

'I thought you'd be ugly under there.'

'No- no, that's the Deadpool. I'm better, and a self-insert.'

The two of you took to walking through the rather nicer side of the waste. You had his hand in yours, swinging it happily like you were a couple before he threatened to chop your hand off.

'You said Logan was a hero, what happened?' he asked.

'You died. Technically you were chest fucked by a tree, but really you just ran out of batteries trying to save this girl- a kid really. Always wanted a man who's good with kids. The shit heels who grew her in a lab called her x-23, but she was just a kid. A smaller, cute and mean version of you. Yep, you saved her, very hero, very demure.'

The two of you were interrupted when a bark sounded over the hill and the BEST DOG EVER ran out to you, ears flapping in the wind, tongue out as it always was. The little boots. The collar. It was Dogpool.

You threw off your mask and picked her up, cuddling her close. 'She's coming with us.'

'No she's not!' he argued.

'Yes, she is!'

'No!'

You pulled out your puppy dog eyes and lifted the dog to your face and slowly the resolve in his face slipped.

'Sorry!' another man ran out, chasing after the dog.

'Fucking shit bag!' you cursed.

It was another dead pool, a good-looking one with long hair.

'What's Ryan Reynolds actually doing here, I thought I replaced him?' you said.

'In here everyone calls me Nicepool.'

'Can we have your dog?' you asked immediately.

He laughed. 'over my dead body!'

You nod, thinking about it but Logan holds out his arm before you can even move.

Whatever Nicepool was saying was you didn't care as you cooed and hugged the dog closer and Logan watched.

Fuck, he was paying attention to you.

'Why are you so nice?' you asked eventually.

'It costs nothing to be kind,' he said.

'Shutting the fuck up is also free,' said Logan.

You bite your lip in his direction. 'God I am so attracted to you right now. This is Logan, he's usually shirtless but he's let himself go since the divorce.'

Finally, the Nicepool took you to his ride to get you and Logan and the dog to the borderlands.

It was a honda fucking odyssey.

Logan wasn't willing to listen to your complaints. 'Get in the fucking car.'

'Make me, Daddy,' you said.

He took one step closer to you and you backed away with the dog. 'No, we're running away!'

Logan forced her from your arms and handed him back to the Nicepool.

'The corn was to dense girl!' you called after her, pouting.

Logan shoves you into the passenger seat while he takes the wheel.

You pull of your mask, hair falling around you like you were in an advert. 'So, what shall we do to pass the time...'

Honda Odyssey coming soon, that my friends, is called edging.

[cleabellanov]

I do actually get insane when the actors adore the relationship between their characters. Like that’s * THE * best bonus we could ask for

I am, of course, talking about Cherik. It’s an art.

Like, we’re all aware the actors love their characters as much as their fans do. And although it’s years ago that all of it was happening, I think the release of Deadpool and Wolverine reignited some very strong flames and flashbacks in this fandom (that. end credits. montage.)

So yeah I just love it when

James and Michael talking about their characters literally raising a child together

James and Michael talk about their characters

Calling the relationship of Magneto and Proffesor X a “love story” because it is

All the times they’re just flirting with each other

(just one EARLY example)

Lines with double meanings and admitting it with no filter

This iconic interview when they talked about fanfiction and fan art like YES GIVE THE PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT

Casually talking about a * Cherik * (emphasis on the ship name) spin-off when they just go “around the world looking for obscure fish”.

And many more, because the chemistry between the actors (Ian and Patrick too obviously) never ceased to be there at the heart of it all.

It makes me wonder what other actors ( cough cough Tom and Owen) would say if they were allowed to, like if disney let them out of the basement for example hahah ☺️ (don’t worry I know they’re doing their best) In any case, I guess we’ll never know…?

What I know, at least, is that X-men as movies and an era are laudable thank you very much

[cowboyx2]

there is something so beautiful about puppet history season 5 finale. of course there’s this montage of clips of earth as the world dies and of course there’s the meteor saying “if i’m going to stop, this looks like a pretty wonderful place to do it.” and of course there’s the professor and his parents all huddling together at the end. there is all of this and i’m sitting here thinking “why am i crying at this silly show”. and honestly that doesn’t really matter but it’s stupid yes and i cry over plenty of things, silly and not, happy or not, but i’m sitting there crying and thinking “of course, of course this, like all things are, is about love”. i love this show about history, which we’ve fought to preserve, i love this show about a feud between a puppet and a man that gets called beef boy on a regular occurrence, i love this show about songs that really don’t mean that much in the scheme of anything. and there’s no real end to this or pretty conclusion, i just really love a lot of things and i love the fact puppet history is about a thousand stupid things but like all things it’s about love. somehow

[terriblyvexed]

hey hey! its one of your readers on ao3 i realized i can ask questions on tumblr so i am trying it out. this may be a controversial question as opinions vary greatly from person to person lool but i am curious being a fellow fan of aot and a fan of your work, so, what did you think about the ending to aot? 👀

(personally i subscribe to a specific fan theory (NOT ANR GOD FORBID i rebuke it!) to keep hope alive in my heart that theres more aot to come cause i did not like the ending much so basically, theres no judgement from me srsly im delulu myself as it stands 😭💯)

anyway thats all thank you for writing left behind and answering my question (potentially)! hope you have a great rest of your day :D

Yeah I know your nickname haha and you can ask or yap about anything!

Ahh yes the ending opinions where swords are drawn two minutes into the debate lol and it’s annoying that people can’t state their thoughts as freely because of the toxicity from every side. This is going to be long I’m sorry😭

I personally didn’t like the ending that much either. I don’t think it’s as bad as people make it out to be, I mean we’ve all seen GoT, but I know a story like AoT could’ve done a little bit better than that, so. It’s not that I wanted Eren to live happily ever after, because his death made the most sense even before I knew about it, but it’s the execution of the episode in general that makes it feel rushed for me.

Mikasa killing him is a beautifully tragic twist, I started bawling my eyes out right there, but I wish the cabin scene was done differently. For me it didn’t feel as raw and honest as the Eren-Armin convo, which I’m not the biggest fan of either, but I’ve always wanted more communication for Eremika so maybe that makes me bitter. Let me see them talk about the table scene and let me see Eren apologise to her. It’s their last moment together, I wanted to see more emotion and honesty rather than an already established relationship that they did off camera. I get what it’s trying to show, and the scene itself is not bad, but I was just a big EM shipper at the time and hoped for more. (I felt the same back when he told her he would wrap that scarf around her forever and always. It hit me just in the right place I remember wanting them to talk about it afterwards but nothing was said.) Same with the memories he gave back to his friends, I’d have liked to see them talk. Him opening his eyes one last time to see her was beautiful no comment there.

Other than that I also LOVED when Levi saluted his friends and comrades! Liked his internal monologue where he said he didn’t regret not bringing Erwin back (Which also made me wish we could’ve seen Armin coming up with impressive strategies and ideas like he used to.)

I liked how Hange was sent off, but I missed them in the final fight.

I really liked the rumbling montage with Guilty Hero playing and Armin’s VA pouring her heart out + that cry at the end when Armin sees Eren. The Levi&Mikasa team-up/final stand was amazing. Those were all done nicely, but that’s pretty much it for me.

For some reason I wasn’t vibing with Annie. I mean she was never my fav but her in season one and in her ova was so much more interesting to me.

I was left underwhelmed by the final fight considering we’ve had great battles like RTS and Liberio previously, it does not compare in my opinion. I understand that Eren won’t kill his friends and I definitely agree with that, but something else could’ve been done with Ymir to make the stakes higher. The ancient titans didn’t feel threatening when you just knew no one was going to die, especially when Falco (first time flying) could dodge all of their arrows.

When everyone there turned into titans, like Jean and Connie, I would’ve preferred if they stayed titans and died when the curse ended. Bringing them back a few minutes later is just meh for me, and makes the emotions I’ve felt a one time thing only because that Jean&Connie dialogue didn’t hit the same afterwards. Not to mention that Connie’s mom was brought back only for us to not see their reunion lol.

Ymir’s storyline was interesting when Eren saw her memories, but after that she lost me a bit. I also don’t like that that *chef’s kiss* scene with Eren telling her she’s just a person didn’t free her at all, that killing Zeke stopped the Rumbling, that Levi was nerfed for the sake of the fight. If all these decisions were done in a slightly expanded time period, I don’t think I would’ve minded much. Especially the final episode itself was, again, rushed in my opinion.

Also, this isn’t just the finale but Historia being sidelined like that is a no-no for me. Not a fan of how the Hizuru-Mikasa plot line didn’t go anywhere either. That may just be nitpicking, but again I do believe season 4 should’ve been longer, maybe with a season 5 as well.

With all that being said, these are just my personal opinions/feelings and despite all, thematically the author did a good job wrapping everything up. Ending a story like AoT couldn’t have been easy at all. Watching it was an experience I don’t think I’ll ever forget or get over and I’m forever going to miss it. (I’m reading the manga now and the uprising arc has me hooked since it’s a bit different from the anime, and dare I say better?)

The ending didn’t ruin it for me or anything, just sad that I won’t get to see the things I wanted to see because naturally everyone has their own expectations, but what are fanfictions for?

What’s the fan theory that you believe? Other than that ANR I’ve heard about the mist and ouroboros but I’ve never read them in detail.

Thank you for reading Left Behind! I’d also like to state that my criticism of the AoT ending does not mean I’ll write one better lol. I like my ending for my story but I’ve already made peace with the fact that some readers might have problems with it. Which is fine as well because I love a good finale debate.

You have a great day/night as well!💓

[sushispider1212]

PvP Civilization and the Hero’s Journey

Note: This does, in fact, contain spoilers for pvpciv so tread with caution.

First off, this is an examination in regards to the concept of a Hero’s Journey. It will be mostly outlining how I feel the series’s narrative fits in with the Hero’s Journey and maybe a couple of predictions about where the series is gonna go from here. (Yes, Parkour Civilization is a more clear-cut hero’s journey. But I’m not talking about that right now.)

So to begin: What is a Hero’s Journey?

A hero’s journey is the idea that a whole lot of myths and stories that revolve around a central protagonist follows a certain template as to how that story works. It’s a series of plot events that can be easily traced through these stories.

These are not always in the same order, and not all the steps are covered. I will be going through the Campbell phases (Joseph Campbell in his 1949 book The Hero with a Thousand Faces), but they’ll be in the order I think best fit pvpciv.

And all good journeys start with the Call to Adventure.

Our protagonist starts in their normal life before something happens in order to get our protagonist off on their adventure.

For our purposes, it’s Evbo’s normal wooden sword life. We can assume he’d only been alive there (and maybe beyond there?) for only a few days, but as stated in the opening narration, that’s just life for him.

His call to adventure? Winning his first match and Tabi showing up.

Winning the first match is important, because it is what gives him hope that he could make it out of the wooden sword phase, but also makes him start to question his normalcy because the guy forfeited.

And Tabi, being the one who travels to the next levels with Evbo with the explicit intent to get him all the way to diamond sword level, is actually a sort of mentor character in the grand scheme of things. She even taught him how to crit, which enabled him to get better at pvp, which got him to the next level, the place unknown to our protagonist.

This leads in to our next step: Supernatural Aid.

This is where our hero gets a magical guardian to help them or give them a boon of some kind. This doesn’t have to be literal, of course, but whatever boon has to help later in the quest.

And this boon? Evbo’s resurrection.

I am of the belief that symbolically, the Diamond Swords are the magic guardians (especially with their training arc that we’ll get to later.) And since Evbo’s resurrection power was gifted by them, it counts as magical aid especially since being able to revive in this world is highly valuable.

And next? The Crossing of the First Threshold.

This is where our hero crosses into a world unknown, traveling beyond to a place where the rule are unknown to them.

Aka Evbo crossing to the Stone Sword level, and subsequently the Iron Sword level.

But here’s where things get real: The Belly of the Whale.

This is where our protagonist has their major failure. From being beaten up badly by the villain, or failing their quest, they hit rock bottom. Normally this phase comes in the middle of the story, but sometimes it’s really early on!

From this failure, they leave behind all the known rules that they may be holding on to, and fully embrace the transformation of the self that ensues.

Evbo encounters this in the murder-reincarnation loop he gets caught in during the Golden Sword training montage. Simply put, before this he was still operating by the known rules of pvpciv, attack people to get sword strength to live. He was also still relatively the same, being a little weird guy with a shopping addiction and an unhealthy dependence on Tabi since she’s the only person who was nice to him. Fun.

But here? It’s rock bottom for him. A no win scenario in which he only gets a small chance of escape every so often to try to win at gold sword level only to die and end up there again. Suffice to say, it’s at this point that Evbo starts to go through his character arc and mature.

Leading into the next part: The Road of Trials.

This is the training arc! The beginning of the transformation! It’s usually a set of tests that the protagonist must complete, aided by their supernatural boon from earlier! They usually fail at least one, but not always.

Evbo’s gold sword training arc is a clear cut Road of Trials. He does the tests, gets better at pvp, and becomes a better fighter and a slightly better person. And he fails, many, many times. This is only possible through his previously acquired supernatural boon, AND the trials are facilitated by the Diamond Swords, Y’know, the magical guardians. Anyway.

Next up: Abyss.

Our hero confronts the being with ultimate power in their life and has to make it out. All of the change and training they’ve went through is to get to this point.

In this case, I believe it is Evbo’s confrontation with Tabi at the end of the season finale.

Tabi, his mentor, the one who’s stuck with him this entire time and taught Evbo how to crit. The one who betrayed Evbo and is also in possession of the most powerful sword, which she stole after beating up the Diamond Swords that Evbo thought were the strongest.

A final confrontation, to see if she still cares…

And he survives into the Apotheosis.

This is the realization stage. The greater understanding that leads to the final stage of the journey.

This is Evbo after the confrontation with Tabi. Him understanding that he needs to leave in order to fix everything, that his resurrection power was given to him by sheer luck. And also the fact that pretty much everyone else is after his head.

And this is where the story ends for now. Right after the revelation and transformation.

But! But! This leads into my final section! Predictions!

Pvpciv doesn’t end in a complete hero’s journey. The reason for this is pretty obvious, since it’s setting up season 2. But where can it go from here?

Remember how I said that the phases can appear out of order? Well, I think the pvpciv season 2 will actually restart the hero’s journey!

The journey is all about the known world vs the unknown world and how our hero changes and transforms over the course of it. Well, at the point where the story is, Evbo certainly has changed, but he also learned and now the unknown world is the known world.

But! That’s only toward the Sword Civilization! The rest of PvP Civilization is the unknown now!

So here’s my idea. We’re gonna go all the way back to the First Threshold and the Belly of the Whale. There’s gonna be more trials and a greater and more powerful supernatural guardian to provide aid (PvP God?).

And! There’s more phases that I skipped over! Here’s the two that I think are going to come up!

Meeting with the Goddess: The hero gains items to help them in the future from a powerful figure. In this case, I think these items will likely be either more PvP weapons, or the Netherite Sword. Likely granted by the new supernatural entity.

Woman as the Temptress: An often female figure that tries to trick the hero from straying from their path. Pretty obvious, but I believe that Tabi will fulfill this role, especially since she’s the most powerful figure in the picture right now, and still feels a friendship with Evbo. I think she’ll try to sway Evbo to her side using that connection, and maybe she’ll be swayed to join Evbo’s side instead? Maybe, we’ll see!

Conclusion.

PvP Civilization is a very interesting version of the hero’s journey, and I hope you have found this as interesting as I do! This came to me about an hour after watching the finale and I like dissecting media into parts.

I may have missed a few things, my memory isn’t infallible, so if there’s something else you’ve noticed, please feel free to say so!

[blue-grama]

The Sign finale probably should have disappointed me, but... didn't?

It's been a heck of a run lately with Thai BLs that haven't quite stuck the landing, and it's got me pondering why The Sign worked for me despite sometimes feeling like a storyboard for a longer, better show.

I don't think they pulled off the emotional payoff they needed, despite that last reunion scene being so pretty and well-acted, simply because too much happened offscreen, from Khem's recovery from a gunshot wound to the entire multlifetime Tharn/Chalothon dynamic getting resolved without us seeing any of it. But somehow I wasn't that mad about it? And ultimately I think it's because this show did so many things well and so many things I'd love to see more of that I'm just like, yep, I enjoyed that ride sirs, please show me something this gorgeous again. In that sense it's joining something like Manner of Death or Kinnporsche where it's like, plot holes? Yes. Bizarre tonal shifts? Absolutely. Occasionally insane writing choices? Uh-huh. Love it anyway? You betcha. So here's what really, really worked for me:

Premise

I am always going to be onboard with QL that isn't solely coming-of-age or coming out. I'm not against those stories, of course, but give me gay romance with adult characters who know themselves and are doing adult things. I'm also a partisan for romances with high external stakes, so the mixture of crime and reincarnation was catnip to me.

Do I care that none of this training makes any sense? No.

2. Setting

Listen. Is The Sign the reason I have a document on my laptop titled "Imaginary trip to Thailand without ever seeing a beach?" Not exactly. But it's also not not the reason.

I am being willingly manipulated by the Thai Tourism Authority.

Kidding, kidding, but I do love when my Thai shows feel Thai or my Korean shows feel Korean, etc etc. I want to be driven to Wikipedia to learn more! Half the fun of watching stuff from not your own country.

3. Chemistry

I think @biochemjess covered what was underwritten about the romance in The Sign. Billy and Babe carried it on their backs and it was hard to dislike their romance, even when the series skipped over key beats.

Any time the pink lighting came out, you were gonna be in for a good time.

4. The camerawork

I don't know enough about film to speak intelligently about this, but the camerawork and aesthetics of this show were just so lovely to watch. It was really doing a lot. @chaos0pikachu wrote about it better than I ever could.

LOVED THIS. LOVED IT. So good.

We had some really lovely storytelling and visual parallels, too, like the first episode and finale both having a big action warehouse scene, or the multiple times that Phaya and Tharn ended up overlooking the Mekong river.

5. It was always kinda off the rails

I know some people felt this show started out with a strong premise and didn't live up to it, but I gotta say, I didn't have that experience. It was always kinda a bonkers watch for me. There were long training montages, random bodies in the shallows, missing genitals, extended performance art, that comedy flashback to Khem and Thongthai's college years... I never knew what I was going to get each Saturday. And I kind of loved that? I'm into unhinged. I was comparing this in my head to Last Twilight, which did disappoint me in the end, and I think it's because Last Twilight was NOT always bonkers and DID set itself up to tell a straighforward story, then dropped the ideas it had been juggling in the last episode. The Sign always felt chaotic to me, so a chaotic ending was par for the course. This is where I'd compare it to KinnPorsche, which had the weirdest fucking ending, but like, okay??? Why not!

End result? I see the flaws, but I'm giving this show tender forehead kisses anyway. Here's hoping for more like it.

[akinmablog]

Nautilus thoughts and minor episode 10 reaction (Spoilers, obviously)

ILOVEITILOVEITILOVEIT

It was more than I ever hoped for

I adore that it really is an origin story for Nemo. He's different from who we know him to be because he's yet to become that man, but there are moments when we see him beginning.

I am so happy that Humility wasn't some useless British lady which was admittedly one of my biggest fears for the show. She has a brain and opinions and heart and is just lovely.

I know that they're setting Nemo and Humility up for their romance, which I am all for, but I gotta say Kai and Loti have won my heart right now. He is an adorable malewife and she is That Bitch.

I did not expect what they did to Aadesh. Had me on my toes the whole time because of it.

I feared for Archie's wellbeing the entire time, not gonna lie

Blaster is just adorable and I will hunt down Lord Prat - Oops, I mean Prit - if it's the last thing I do.

Creepy Crawley, you're gonna catch these hands.

Jagadish, Benoit, I will never forget you! *sobs*

What is up with Jiacomo? Where was he from? I know he was an asylum patient, but there's obviously more to it than that. Was it electroshock therapy? Even lobotomised, possibly? Either way, I loved him!

Suyin is Mother and no one will hurt her babies! (If anything happens to her, I will riot)

Turan. Oh, Turan. From his bad poetry to his romancing a weird sea insect queen, he is just adorable.

Ranbir you went through so much, sweet boy, let me give you a hug.

Boniface, firstmate of the Nautilus, you are a great and wonderful man and I hope you find your brother, you sweet little cupcake!!

Cuff, I don't trust you after what you did!

Youngblood seems okay so far but I am keeping my eyes on you, captain!

Billy? Billy?! BILLY!!!!

The cricket scene was brilliant. I just wish we got to see them beat up the other crew more.

The fight scene in episode 9 was awesome. I loved seeing the Norse characters have their own little story arc, too.

"I'm gonna burn the whole damn company to the ground." SWOONING SOMEBODY CATCH ME.

"This is about bringing down the company." YES RANBIR!

"Not quite nothing." That's my boy, Turan!

Nemo hiding in plain sight as Crawley thinks he's got the upperhand? Oh, Nemo, stop making me fall in love with you!

Using gossip and slander as a weapon? Oh, this is good. Too good.

The whole montage in episode 10 was brilliant. So well done.

Jerico Baker jumping in to buy the mine made me giggle.

Oh my god, he was in on it! So clever. Captain Nemo, you devil you.

BYE CRAWLEY WON'T MISS YOU

Not the man's wig falling off, how embarrassing

Girl, good for you! Even if I am officially jealous.

Blaster's reaction to the kiss lmao

We should - We shOUlD - Humility, same.

"I care for you. More than I know how to tell you." MY HEART!

The final confrontation was wonderful.

GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF HER YOU GIANT PRAT! KICK HIS ASS LOTI!

"That's my girl." DAMN RIGHT LADIES!

I swear to god, Crawley, you and me - outside - right now!

YOUNGBLOOD! NOOOOO! I WAS SO WRONG TO DOUBT YOU!

He did it for Blaster. He did it for Nathaniel!

YOUNGBLOOD! NATHANIEL! RANBIR!

"Thank you, Mr Harris." Oh look now I'm heartbroken.

Oh, Kai. The worse thing is that he knows, on some level at least, that Nemo is right and that's what's really heartbreaking.

Aww, Loti and Humility. That's my girls!

Wait, is that - are they - is he - OH MY GOD!

A CLIFFHANGER? IT ENDED ON A CLIFFHANGER? (I was warned about there being a cliffhanger, FYI) BUT A CLIFFHANGER!!! *aggressively shakes laptop*

My beautiful ocean-based found family I love you and I miss you all already!!!

[numericalbridge]

i know fandom has a strong reaction to calling Amity 'bland', but to me she does seem bland for the bigger part of season 2, and it has nothing to do with her 'not being mean anymore'. I think for me at least, it is the mix of two things:

First, she gets a lot of time dedicated to her and her development in season 1, and she is very clearly presented as a major character, so the expectations for her character are pretty high. But then in season 2 she gets less and less time dedicated just to her own development as the show introduces new characters and focuses on the bigger plot. And while Amity is still treated better by the narrative compared to Gus and Willow, especially in s2b it seems like the focus is often shifted from her own character to her reactions to other characters. And that is understandible when it is her relationship with Luz, who is the main character, but then s2b episodes seem to focus heavily on what kind of people the Blight parents are, rather than on Amity herself. So, although there is still some focus on her own development there is a difference between s2 and s1. And in the end it feels like her arc is finished really early on compared to other characters.

And the second, bigger problem, is that she just doesn't have strong dynamics with characters other than Luz and her own family. She has a dynamic with Willow, but i think i am not the only one who finds the writing weird and unsatisfying - Willow is barely there for the duration of s2a, she doesn't factor in Amity's conflict with her parents, and the conflict between Amity and Willow in s2b is inconsistent and quickly resolved. With Gus Amity has no dynamic at all. Even if it was an intentional choice for the two to be distant through out the series - why not include a little comment here and there about the way they feel about each other? Funny how Gus is protective of Willow when it suits Hunter's arc, but there is never even a tiny scene about the way he feels about Willow's and Amity's friendship except a bit of advice in LR. And Amity never shows open interest in befriending him. With Hunter Amity only properly interacted for one episode, and even if it is understandible that there was no time to develop their dynamic more deeply, there was a missed opportunity to examine how their fight had affected Amity that would have been interesting to explore, but is never brought up instead. With Lilith her arc is non existent. Even Amity's dynamic with Bosha and her clique is at best in the background through out season 2.

But ok, some of these are because of the shortening, and some stem from the bigger problem of the toh's tendecy to sideline Gus and Willow. But Amity doesn't even have strong dynamics with Eda and King, who are the show's main characters alongside Luz. There was a perfect opportunity to develop their dynamics in Eclipse Lake, but nothing new was done with them. In s1 King was so jealous of Willow and Gus, then after character development in s2 he wanted Luz to mention him to her mom, but there is no particular personal interactions or dynamic between him and Amity?

So in the end, Amity's development feels restricted to the bubble of her family and Luz, but as she is a part of the main friend group and clearly a major character, there is just not enough of interesting dynamics and often it feels she is kinda just there when the relationships with Luz and the Blights are not the focus. And even in her relationship with Luz it seems that except for Reaching Out there is more focus on just lumity with some very quikly resolved problems - and, no, it doesnt mean i would want it to be an angst fest, but added to everything else it doesnt help Amity's character.

And that's why i like s3 Amity more, because she is at least shown to actively interact with other kids and Camila, even if in montages or in the background. And, yes, that's a general flaw of the show with its inability to balance the cast and the character arcs, but i feel that even if there was no way to develop various dynamics then at least they could've done something interesting and fresh Amity's development in s2.

[hmspogue]

Outer Banks Season 3 Shot by Shot Trailer Rundown

I do not own any clips or screenshots, all rights to Netflix and the creators.

To say I'm still reeling would be the understatement of the century, let's get into it.

John B: "From the very beginning, it was always Kooks..."

Even though they're set on us prying this orange filter from their cold dead fingers, these first two shots are actually stunning?

"...and Pogues"

Holy hell, we know we have all the ohter Pogues reuniting with their parents after they get back home, so JJ being all alone at this house is actually so heartbreaking.

Jiara nation rise, it looks like Bracelet Touch™ takes place at the empty Maybank house I'm not well.

"Some people with everything..."

Why are season 3's always everyones haircut season in shows like what is the source of this phenomenon?

But Rafe and Barry with the key

This hiding job is on par with JJ throwing pew pillows over it in the church.

Although, kind of think this is them getting ready to try and melt the cross down (which makes me so beyond furious), because off to the side you see the lighter fluid and the muffin tins, then later there's shots of gold.

"...and some with nothing."

The DIVIDE. I actually love the dynamic of Kooks vs Pogues heating up and the two cultures that try and exist on a very small island together. Especially since this season seems to be Kiara centric, her whole identity being called into question about where she falls I NEED IT.

I cannot even begin to express how sad I am that we're probably going to get approximately 3 seconds of them hanging out on Poguelandia because look at them!!! Let them be happy!!!

"That's the way it's always been."

SDHCULAISUEHLWAG JIARA FISHING ISNT JUST A MONTAGE I REPEAT JIARA FISHING WILL NOT JUST BE A MONTAGE.

I LOVE HER SO MUCH YES BABE GO FISHING!!!

Pope and Cleo making a signal fire together. Looks like that scene from the teaser of them walking in the field was probably them trying to scout out a good spot for it.

Jarah B looking fine as hell John B I know that bandana is your father's but i cannot even begin to imagine how disgusting it is at this point I'm sorry-

IM BEING SO NORMAL ABOUT THIS!!!!

I feel like both this shot and the previous one are them being saved by the plane that lands.

(@whitetrashjj the mullet truther, your time has come).

"Until now."

This may be my favorite John B set up narration so far.

Also, like I said, them getting rescued by the plane. Kiara looks almost hesitant? Could be the same shot as above where her and JJ aren't too sure about this plane or the people on it.

MMMMMMMM VERY concerning JJ bike crash. Pope and Cleo (or maybe Kie?) in the back of the truck with a crate.

Okay this is SO intereting to me because Ward with blood all over himself (whatelse is new?), Rafe, and Sarah helping him? I can't tell what's in his hand. But the family dynamics this season are goign to be somehow even messier, I can feel it.

Kiara getting kidnapped and taken to wilderness camp, I'm so not ready for this like. It's for sure the Carrera house in the back, the two shirts say Kitty Hawk Adventure.

For a long time, we all thought this was going to be something they ended the season on, but now it seems like it'll be a plot point in the middle. Thanks to @sun-undone and her unhinged costuming documents, we know that this yellow halter top is after the Carrera anniversary party we got BTS from (with the Jiara gate fight and John B rocking Topper's shit and Mike's "see, this is what I'm talking about, JJ"). We know Kie is seen later witht he Pogues, so Blue Ridge may be a quick, one episode plot mid season.

If they've been holding Blue Ridge over her head the whole season, then John B beating the shit out of Topper at the party is sort of the last straw, I cannot een begin to imagine the fight that he and JJ will have about it????

JJ and Kiara INSIDE the Chateau and a fire being lit OUTSIDE? If someone's trying to burn the house down witht hem trapped inside there will be heLL TO PAY.

IF THE CHATEAU GETS BURNED DOWN IM COMING FOR THE PATES I STG DON'T DO THIS TO ME WHY DO I FEEL LIKE IT WOULD BE MY CHILDHOOD HOME BURNING KJDFLAIUDHFAL??????

I know that Cline talked about having to mentally take Sarah to some very dark places this season and this shot just confirms my theory that I seriously think Sarah's going to kill someone and deal with the emotional consequences of that.

I want this to be feral JJ so badly after Kiara's taken, but, sadly, he's not in the right outfit. Not the first time we've seen machete!JJ though.

We saw this shot in the teaser, but looks like they're climbing up an abandoned elevator shaft. They're in their clothes they have on get reunited with Kie. I think it's from the same abandoned hotel the Pogues (minus Kiara, probably because they're going to save her) are in front of in a different shot.

Andd here it is: the new plot of the season and confirmation they're going after fucking EL DORADO NEXT LIKE.

Important to note this is shot on a plane as well.

Oh the Twinkie, how I missed you.

oh look they remembered a mom besides Anna this season WHY MY EYES WET LIKE THESE REUNIONS ALSO WHILE JJ IS COMPLETELY ALONE. HEYWARD, ADOPT HIM YOU COWARD!

Kiara's relationship with her parents is so askjhfailsuh COMPLICATED because I think they really do love her. And she wants more than anything for them to understand her and they just keep missing each other.

"My father and me..."

This shot is very aesthetically pleasing to me. That's all I have to say about it.

YEAH OKAY AND THEN I STARTED FUCKING WEEPING BECAUSE THIS?????? I CANT BELIEVE THEY PUT BABY JOHN B IN THE TRAILER?????

If they only do baby Sarah and Baby John B I will do something so drastic-

"...the treasure was our way out."

The way he's looking at his father? Like the pride in his eyes? I know this relationship is going to sting so badly with the way the Pates have talked about John B having to reconcile the idealized version of his father in his head with the one that left him for gold.

This is a kid that hasn't been hurt by the world or his father yet and I wanna hug him.

(post will be continues apparently i can only up load 30 images at once)

[iamjucie]

Astarion the Musical

Today, I spent several hours creating a playlist that tells Astarion's story (a version of it) through songs. I want to share the playlist with you, along with this post as a companion to describe the context.

In my mind it plays out like a musical would- context and dialogue happening between musical numbers. I hope you enjoy.

Song explanations:

The Code: Post game Astarion introducing his story to the audience. A synopsis of his story from the POV of the person who lived through it. 

"I, I went to Hell and back To find myself on track I broke the code, whoa-oh-oh Like ammonites I just gave it some time Now I found paradise I broke the code, whoa-oh-oh"

The story starts when he is attacked by the Gur and is approached by Cazador.

The Killing Moon: Cazador turns him into his spawn.

"Under blue moon I saw you So soon you'll take me Up in your arms, too late to beg you Or cancel it, though I know it must be The killing time Unwillingly mine Fate Up against your will Through the thick and thin He will wait until You give yourself to him"

Dead Arms & Dead Legs: After he has turned, coming to terms with his new undead self. 

"I have been out walking with these Dead Arms & Dead Legs And the mysteries of the universe are patterned in my head The terrain becomes unbearable - too steep to stick your heel I imagine myself here again in 50 million years I run to the left... I run to the right And all my fears become a life And what is left... and who are you in the end?"

Queer: He is seducing victims and luring them to Cazador using his body and charm.

"Hey boy, take a look at me Let me dirty up your mind I'll strip away your hard veneer And see what I can find The queerest of the queer The strangest of the strange The coldest of the cool The lamest of the lame The numbest of the dumb I hate to see you here You choke behind a smile A fake behind the fear The queerest of the queer"

The Dead Come Talking: Feeling guilt about the victims he led to death. He can't seem to forget them.

"Feel the worms eating holes through my mind Like regrets that'll kill me in time Walking backwards is always a guess Distant faces burn holes in my chest, mm-mm, mm-mm Shadows floating, they're out in the hall They still haunt you long after they're gone Buried in the basement, cold cement Dead come talking, can't put them to rest"

rises the moon: Montage of his life as a slave under Cazador, time passes and his hope for an escape becomes less and less. 

"Days seem sometimes as if they'll never end Sun digs its heels to taunt you But after sunlit days, one thing stays the same Rises the moon Days fade into a watercolour blur Memories swim and haunt you But look into the lake, shimmering like smoke Rises the moon"

Abbey: He is out in the city hunting, daydreaming of freedom. 

"There is a light, I feel it in me But only, it seems, when the dark surrounds me There is a dream and it sleeps in me Keeps me awake in the night Crying, "Set me free" And I wake every night Crying, "Set me free" "

Kidnapped by the Nautiloid.  Nautiloid crashes. 

Hand Me My Shovel, I’m Going In!: He wakes up at the crash site and is freaking out. He is in the sun, and not burnt to ash.

"This is not enough, this is not enough to prove it yet No, I need to hit the bottom This is not enough, this is not enough to prove it yet No, I need to hit the bottom Gotta get to the bottom of this Gotta get to the bottom of this Gotta get to the bottom of this"

Meet Tav.

Survival: He realizes he has an actual chance at freedom now that he met Tav.

"You won't pull ahead I'll keep up the pace And I'll reveal my strength To the whole human race Yes, I am prepared To stay alive I won't forgive, the vengeance is mine And I won't give in Because I choose to thrive Yeah, I'm gonna win!"

Biting Down: Drinks Tav’s blood for the first time. His first time drinking blood from a thinking creature and he realizes why it was kept from him. He feels alive. He feels powerful.

"Skip a hit, don't make a sound (It feels better biting down) Breathed so deep I thought I'd drown (It feels better biting down) Listen to the beats resound (It feels better biting down) It feels better biting down (It feels better biting down)"

Little White Lies: Gaining Tav’s trust, making her fall in love with him for protection.

"Would you leave me for dead, or would you come to my aid? If I don't tell you some pretty words Should it keep you coming my way I never meant to lie, but there are things we do and say to get by Little white lies, a small surprise, how big they grow in size It all starts simple enough Your present is dark because your childhood was rough So you shed your skin and you change your name in the hopes of Putting air in between you and the pain, so grab a mask Fill up a flask, slither like a snake into the mascaraed"

Terrible Thing: Seduces Tav enough for her to sleep with him.

"I know what you're doin' here Made your intentions clear Oh you, you terrible thing, you Terrible thing, you Terrible thing, you Beautiful thing Honey, you're so cold You left me on patrol Lose my self-control with you (when I'm with you) Do things I don't want to do, ooh"

Laplace’s Angel (Hurt People? Hurt People!): Feelings for Tav are growing, and the guilt of manipulating her is starting to get to him so he tries to justify his actions.

"It doesn't take a killer to murder It only takes a reason to kill We've all got evidence of innocence, it's "everything's coincidence" The difference twixt fate and free will is whether you're singing Ooh, could you take a look at me? Am I bad, am I bad, am I bad, am I really that bad? And now we're singing, ooh Whatever you think of me If you were in my shoes (yes, it's only natural!) You'd walk the same damn miles I do Oh, oh, right!"

Gilded Lily: After Tav does not force him to drink Araj’s blood. He is processing his trauma. He realizes that Tav cares for him more than anyone ever has.

"Haven't I given enough, given enough? Always the fool with the slowest heart But I know you'll take me with you We'll live in spaces between walls Every city's got a graveyard The service bought and paid for Now I'm sleeping in the backyard Passing out as night turns into day"

Against the Kitchen Floor: He confesses to Tav that he was originally manipulating her but now has genuine feelings for her. He has never known the feeling of somebody wanting him for more than his body and he doesn't know how to handle it well.

"I don't owe you my heart And I don't owe you my body But you should know that I'm sorry For being careless with you Lord knows I owe you more Than I'm pretty sure I ever could give anybody But I can't pin down what normal people want from foreign objects Bottom shelf erotic products like me So, I could hold your hand but keep you at arm's length Or hang me from a branch too high to climb and shake Less rare than scarce, less diamond than rough Unlikely to be more than just the coal you fail to crush, and I swear, I'm really trying It just don't come natural to me to think that you'd want me for me I swear, I'm really trying Oh, I'm sorry, I promise, I'm doing my best I just haven't learned how to be human as you are yet"

you should see me in a crown: They find out from Raphael what his scars on his back mean, and about the Ritual of Profane Ascension. He is fantasizing about what he would do if he managed to overtake it in private. He wants the power it would grant him.

"You should see me in a crown I'm gonna run this nothing town Watch me make 'em bow One by, one by one, one by, one by You should see me in a crown Your silence is my favorite sound Watch me make 'em bow One by, one by one, one by, one by one"

Perhaps Vampire is a Bit Strong But... : Astarion fights and confronts Cazador for the centuries of abuse he put him through. 

"'Cause all you people are vampires And all your stories are stale And though you pretend to stand by us I know you're certain we'll fail I've seen your eyes as they fix on me, full of confusion Your snarl is just so condescending Try to explain that we're onto a win If the fee we are in near recoups what we're spending"

He can choose to complete the ritual in Cazador’s place, or kill him. Tav convinces him to not go through with the ritual, he kills Cazador:

What Was I Made For?: He kills Cazador and doesn’t complete the ritual expecting a sense of relief and gratification but feels nothing. He thought he would feel free without a master to rule over him, but he feels lost.

"What was I made for? Hm 'Cause I, I I don't know how to feel But I wanna try I don't know how to feel But someday I might Someday I might"

Two Coffins: He is coming to terms with Tav’s mortality. He is mourning the loss of the opportunity to have her forever by not going through with the ritual.

"Two coffins for sleep One for you one for me We'll get there eventually In the dark of our graves our bodies will decay I wish you'd never change How lucky I ever was to see The way that you smile at me Your little moon face shining bright at me One day soon there'll be nothing left of you and me Two coffins for sleep Two coffins for sleep All the things that I have yet to lose Will someday be gone soon Back into annihilation All things will fade Maybe it's better off that way I wish you'd stay with me"

Rain: For a moment, he regrets not going through with the ritual and feels a slight disdain for Tav for stopping him. This song is when he comes to realize it was the correct choice and is thanking her. He knows that he would have just become just like Cazador, and thanks to her he is breaking the cycle of abuse.

"For so long, I have waited So long that I almost became Just a stoic statue, fit for nobody And I don't wanna get in your way But I finally think I can say That the vicious cycle was over The moment you smiled at me"

My Instincts Are The Enemy: He is confiding in Tav that he wants to be with her forever, but explaining what that means for her. He is tied to the night, and she is tied to him. Is she ok with that?

"I'm paralyzed, engaged in civil war What can I do? Either way, I lose You lose, too Days are nights, and nights are unbearable What can I do? Chained to this mood You're chained to me Keep asking different questions The same answer I receive I need you more than ever To tell me what you've seen"

Sunlight: The Netherbrain is defeated and the tadpoles are gone from their minds. Without the tadpole he is now unable to withstand the sun. He is coping with the lack of sun by replacing it with Tav. From now on she is his sunlight.

"I had been lost to you, sunlight And flew like a moth to you, sunlight, oh, sunlight Oh, your love is sunlight Oh, your love is sunlight But it is sunlight All the tales the same Told before and told again A soul that's born in cold and rain Knows sunlight, sunlight, sunlight And at last can grant a name To a buried and a burning flame As love and its decisive pain Oh, my sunlight, sunlight, sunlight"

Fin.

[xoyalanztov]

Just watched barbie and I am going through so many emotions right now.

SPOILERS AHEAD:

Okay so. This movie is a lot more than I thought it would be? like yeah I definitly expected the feminist subtext but they brought out the P word? saying the word Patriarchy out loud is like putting your hand on the stove, but I'm so happy they included it. Because this movie reflects a point where a lot of us are at in our lives. We are growing up, watching the people around us getting radicalised and its such a difference from what we used to be. How kind we used to be.

And Barbie is great at reminding us of that. Greta is so clever of never falling into the trap of saying: people are selfish, or all men suck. She knows what people will say about the movie, so she already added her rebutalls in, which is really clever.

The patrirachy affects everyone. This is a fact. Women live as a walking contradiction, cognizant of themselves and others at all times (with "an undertone of violence"), and we are so scared. All the time. It's exhausting be here, especially if you're an immigrant in a first world country, because you are constantly being reminded of how much better you have it. What people don't understand is that it's not enough. We deserve more. When the Barbies were getting their Nobel Prizes they were so confident, so assured in their right for recognization of the amazing work they've done, and just. I want that. So bad. I want to look at something and say I earned that.

And the Ken's were just this backdrop charecter, and it was achingly similar to how women are often presented in media. When Ken went into the real world he saw that he could be respected, could be loved, so of course he wanted that. This just shows that unbalanced societies will find ways to even themselves out, and those ways won't be great for everyone. But it does pose a great question for all "alpha" men: Who are you without the grind mindset, your podcast and your minifridge stocked with beer? Who are you? What is your life's purpose? What have you done with your life so far? You can do anything, and you are free to do anything. You don't have to work 80 hour weeks. You don't have to work yourself to the bone. Ask for help. Ask for compassion. Its ok.

And the way the movie makes fun of Mattel?? Aboslutely hilarious. Yes Barbie started out as a woman that could do anything, but she was perverted into this shell of herself, so that all that mattered was how much she would sell. This subtle dig at capitlisim is great, and the showcasing of performative activisim is top tier.

I think that at the heart of it this movie is about the thing that most great works of art are: human connection. The connection between mother and daughter, how it may wane, but if it is fostered and treated with respect it will flourish. Gloria loves her daughter. She gives her the speace she needs, lets her daughter grow. And her daughter understands that she needs that space, but also jumps to her mothers defence. Ken just wants to be loved, just wants someone to be there for him. Barbie helps him through that, and in the end, where Ken almost throws himself off the roof, Simu's Ken helps in persuading him not to, despite their bitter rivalry. Because love has many forms, and shouldn't just come from one person. Because we are more than a forgotten kiss.

Don't even get me started on the montages. I am so happy to be human. I am so in love with everything and everyone.

[bengiyo]

Ossan's Love Returns Ep 6 Stray Thoughts

Last week, the main gays went on a trip! Kurosawa and Izumi independently won trips. Kurosawa gave his to Haruta and Maki and joined them on the trip. It was very fun, and we got create Chief vs Maki moments. Izumi is still into Haruta, but he was able to bond with Maki when Maki was looking for his missing ring. Kiku shared more insights about Izumi and his history with Akito. Eventually we had a big brawl in the hotel dining room as everyone’s jealousy and issues came to the fore. Maki almost shot Kurosawa with an arrow. It was incredible. Haruta reaffirmed that he only wants to be with Maki, and that other disappointments (including losing the ring) pale in comparison to the fear of losing Maki. Anyway, we found the ring!

Kiku, I really hope you move on from this man.

I’m glad that Haruta is engaged with the wedding planning, but I’m worried about how sleepy Maki is.

I like that this show, which probably has way more reach than WDYEY, is also pointing out that this ceremony is entirely symbolic and confers no economic or social benefits to their partnership.

Haruta is always dealing with so much romantic attention that he barely registers that Izumi is staring at him like the second chance at his great love while Haruta is literally planning a wedding with Maki.

I am so amazed that the Genius group is still active.

Episode 6: Deep Crimson Valentine’s Wedding

This feels weird if the Chief is going to help Haruta with the wedding meeting because he almost married Haruta in the first season. Haruta left him at the altar!

Choko and her mom mostly planned the Chief’s first wedding, and now he’s here with Haruta. I love the commitment to the mother-in-law bit.

Haruta, you don’t always have to say yes to everyone!! Do not help Kiku this way!

This ghost bit is way over the line! Haruta, please!!

I hope they revert their wedding plan for Maki’s sake.

Why is Takegawa the one doing the counseling???

Haruta, you really should not be trying on tuxedos with the Chief.

I like the chief and Kiku commiserating together. I like Haruta talking about finding shared values in marriage. I don’t like Maki working on decorations by himself even though he’s exhausted.

Maki not making his own wedding because his chariman is going to upset me.

This situation with the pickles is ridiculous. If they don’t have these two fuck I will be so disappointed.

FUCK YEAH, MARO, COME THROUGH!!!

The season 1 montage has me in my feelings.

I like this little scene with the different chocolate shapes.

They took the step together!

I’m gonna need all these people sour in romance to leave!

NOOOOO!!!! NOT THE CHIEF!!!!

Oh, I am curious how Haruta and Maki handle caring for a kid next week.

I am so relieved that Haruta and Maki actually got married. There’s been so much drama getting to this moment for so many years that I fully expected there to be some sort of last-minute mishap keeping them apart. Overall, I don’t think all of the active elements worked together very well this week, and that feels bad to say on the wedding episode. I was hoping it would be a triumphant moment in and of itself, but it feels like there’s so much of other people’s unhappiness pushing in at the edge of the whole affair. Then we end on the chief’s health in jeopardy? I’m happy for Haruta and Maki, and hope we start to clean up all this other sadness in the show.

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

argh NO the feelings of listening to Make A Man Out Of You for the millionth time and having it sink in that Shang goes through ALL the emotions as he sings it and he gets his own little character arc

like it's a montage of Mulan coming into her own for the very first time and the soldiers learning to work together with their strengths-

and it's also Shang, singing the song, singing his parts SEPPERATE from the chorus, drowning them out-

him the captain, alone at the top, leading and guiding, determined to prove himself and be out there on the field to help his father- him starting out so full of CONFIDENCE and conviction yes he WILL make a man out of you! (somehow) sharing his idea of what a man is: BALANCE. Tranquil and on fire. it's finding your center, you place inside yourself

but then the soldiers all sing and they're begging for their lives under his training, hopeless, the mood isn't we're in this together it's i am going to die die die die hey lets throw rocks at ping- ping is even worse than the rest of us we all hate ping

Shang's sings again and there's desperation now, heed my every order and you MIGHT survive-

he's not hoping to train the best army ever anymore, he's scared he'll lead people to their death because he Cant Train Them right, he's running out of time to get them ready,

And this is the moment he tells Ping / Mulan to go home. his darkest hour in the song, him giving up, him admitting HE'S failed

how could i ever make a man out of you? Not, how could YOU ever be a man- how could /I/ ever make you one! Maybe Ping could be a great soldier, but Shang can't teach it

(am i reaching? maybe. i dont care)

He blames himself. A bad teacher, he thinks. but he will not send someone who can't fight into a war just to die

(a good captain)

Ping would've just been the first one he sent home, im sure

Mulan CAN'T go home though, for her HERSELF she can't do it- her father is safe now and she has a way out but no No NO, she climbs the pole to reach the arrow as the song climbs with her,

Shang's voice tenses with this sort of desperate hope and wonder as he hits the last note, as she throws down the arrow, as he looks up and sees-

she got there using both weights, using BALANCE. His teachings-

but he didn't teach Ping that

And finally. FINALLY

shang sings with the chorus

the instruments drop away and it's just voices, Shang in lead yes, but the soldiers are with him now. or maybe it's him finally being with them?

Mulan's example brought them together. Her, Ping's success, wasn't just a victory for new recruits- it was the moment SHANG saw he could be a good teacher, a good captain

with help.

he gave Mulan room to try herself, he showed her basics, cared more about Ping's safety than his own ego- told Ping go home, -I- can't teach you. I have failed. He left the door open for Ping to teach himself

remember the chorus? "Be a man" -it's a CHORUS it's NEVER sung alone

(like shang has been singing)

A man isn't singular. He isn't separate. Isn't alone.

He is the moment the whole camp looks up and CHEERS to see the weakest one of them make it to the top

a man is that last shot, all of them together, moving as one

their center isn't something they hold inside themselves. None of them start winning until they turn their focus outward and find their center in the people around them- they come into their own when they see ANYONE even PING can be a man

and Shang needed to see that too

that shot of him running with soldiers and Ping at lead is the visual version of that last chorus line

he started out wanting to make men out of these guys, he ended up learning to be one of the men himself instead

and i think ive fried my brain