#What herbs go with beef

[tillmankennedy31]

Pork Loin How To Cook Dinner One Of The Best Oven Roasted Pork Loin S&sm

For this crock pot pork loin recipe, we wish boneless pork loin roast. As with any lean minimize of meat, whether it is overcooked, it is going to be dry. https://costack.uk/ 's to cook dinner it to a hundred forty five degrees Fahrenheit and no extra. The pork shall be a tiny bit pink in the heart and buttery gentle. Served with rice and a facet of asparagus.

Southern-cuisine professional and cookbook author Diana Rattray has created more than 5,000 recipes and articles in her 20 years as a food writer. Bacon and blackberry preserves pack a robust taste punch in this easy primary dish. Whether that is your first vacation as host or you just do not wish to stress about the main course, consider this dish a meat, sauce and aspect multi functional. Crush garlic with rosemary, salt, and pepper in a mortar and pestle to make a paste.

Can't See What You Are Trying For? Browse Our Assortment Of Cooking Guides

Serve this pork tenderloin with our creamy cucumber salad and some greek lemon potatoes. And if you like pork recipes, make certain to try our popular baked pork chops. Slow cooking pork loin in a crock pot at a low temperature is perfect and isn’t going to dry out or damage your pork. Make certain you get a great quality reduce of Pork Loin for this recipe. Ina's Tex-Mex soup with pork loin, hominy and salsa verde is hearty, crowd-pleasing and piled excessive with fixings. Another approach to get a pleasant golden crust is to cook dinner it at a high temperature. Refer to the beneath inside temperature tips for the specified doneness. Also, try our awesome recipe for balsamic glaze to add to your meat when serving. Allrecipes is part of the Dotdash Meredith publishing household.

Pork loin roast and pork tenderloin are two very totally different cuts of meat. The tenderloin is much narrower, leaner, and cooks so much sooner too. So for this recipe, make certain the packaging particularly says pork loin roast and not pork tenderloin. For pork tenderloin, make certain to check out our Best Damn Oven Roasted Pork Tenderloin recipe. Marinating this pork loin in a mix of brown sugar and apple cider ensures a flavorful, succulent roast. The sweet spice rub finishes this marinated apple cider pork loin perfectly. Chef James Briscione cooks up a holiday feast with guys from a neighborhood distillery. (-) Information isn't currently obtainable for this nutrient. If you are following a medically restrictive diet, please consult your physician or registered dietitian earlier than preparing this recipe for personal consumption.

Tips On How To Prepare Dinner Pork Tenderloin So It’s Juicy And Tender Every Time

The US Department of Agriculture recommends that pork ought to be cooked to 145 levels F and then allowed to take a seat for five minutes earlier than serving. This will make your pork medium uncommon and perhaps a bit pink within the middle. Another way to serve pork loin is with brussels sprouts and baked potatoes,Creamy Mashed Potatoes, or Garlic Roasted Potatoes. Wrapping the loin in pastry is a fantastic method of sealing in moisture, as properly as being completely delicious. Treat yourself with these recipes for each loin and tenderloin Wellingtons beneath.

Pork loin is rich and decadent, so it’s finest when served with one thing shiny and fresh.

Also, if you cook dinner pork loin, at all times make certain the white fat cap facet is up.

The beneficial inner temperature for pork loin is 145˚F.

I made this recipe and it actually is the best rattling roast pork loin I even have ever made!

Slice pork and serve drizzled with Honey Garlic Butter Sauce.

Serve with roasted potatoes or steamed green beans. To begin, I tried cooking the pork tenderloin all through in a cast-iron skillet over medium-high warmth on my stovetop. By the time the pork’s inside was nicely cooked and juicy, although, the crust had turn out to be too dark, virtually burnt. “But Kat,” you may say, “this is how I cook dinner a steak, and it’s fine!

Extra Scrumptious Pork Recipes:

It has a fat layer that keeps it moist as it cooks. This roasted pork loin goes great with green beans and creamy mashed potatoes. Try our cheesy baked green beans recipe. Learn tips on how to cook pork loin with very little prep time and versatility, you'll be able to change this dish as you would like. If you aren't a garlic fan, miss the garlic cloves and use onions or scallions.

[alexvacice]

Oh how I love you modern Merlin as a medieval history professor. I can just imagine his students talking about him. "His lectures are great, he talks about it like he was actually there."

"Do NOT bring up Arthuriana he WILL go on an hour long rant and you WILL miss your last train home."

"He has this weird academic beef with Geoffrey Chaucer?!"

"His office reeks of herbs, lord knows what he puts in his morning tea."

"Dude's been teaching here for like 30 years and he still somehow looks 22."

"I swear to you, I saw his eyes turn gold one time during a lecture."

[apocalypse-shuffle]

JASON TODD | RED HOOD (generalized fanon | maybe wfa)

—

“Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow” (Jason Todd x Fem!Reader)

| Jason and you need to talk, the incident with Robin hanging over your necks like a relationship guillotine, but days later Jason’s realizing that shit is easier said than done.

| SFW, pre-established relationship, secret identity, reader’s hair is long enough to go into cornrows

| pic source: right= Batman Annual #25, middle= Red Hood: The Lost Days, and end= Batman: Under The Red Hood • all comics

| part of the meet the bats series

| 1k+ words

It’s been three days.

Three days of them easing around one another. Of this awkward balance of you not knowing how to best broach the topic and Jason knowing that but being too tense to push. For the last three days he’s been actively fighting the need to cut and run until it was silently agreed upon that you’d both just ignore that night and the appearance of Robin entirely.

That’s what you’re both doing right now actually.

Rarely, in your case, there’s nothing filling the silence around you. No music, no podcast, you yourself aren’t even cutting through the silence with your own voice. The only sounds between the two of you are the drone of the stove vent, the clicking of the oven, and the knife in Jason’s hand clinking against the wooden cutting board he’d gotten you last year as a housewarming gift; the sound of it knocking through his head like a taunt with every cut.

You’re keeping to yourselves in your little corners of the kitchen, a crude facsimile of your usual laughter-filled Sunday Dinner prep.

“Can you chop the parsley for me now, Jay?”

Jason hums and moves to fulfill the request, barely moving an inch to where the wicker produce basket is chilling on the counter and grabbing the herb.

He chops it all in under a minute and turns to swipe the hand full or so from the board to the bowl of ricotta, shredded mozzarella, and seasonings you’re mixing but when you turn to him his brain stalls a bit.

It’s not like he hasn’t seen you before now. This was your place and you’d greeted him at the door, but even the way you’d said ‘hi’ to each other had felt weighted. There’d been a slew of unsaid emotions locked behind both of your words but apparently catching sight of you now - slightly frizzy week old cornrows and a smear of hastily wiped tomato sauce on your cheek - is what finally unlocks his jaw.

You hold the bowl out for him to scrape the parsley in, not looking at him as you talk; your eyes, instead, on the stove top.

“I need you to taste the sauce before I add the ground beef, it’s kinda sour—”

“—Did you mean it?”

When you pause to blink over at him he finally remembers to scrape the parsley in.

“What?” Your face screws up before your head shakes. You put the bowl down on the counter behind you so you can cross your arms.

He does the same with his board, clearing his throat.

“That love and trust stuff you said the other night? That wasn’t just some shock induced rambling, right?”

The way you purse your lips bellies your frustration, but whatever his face is doing ultimately make you sigh.

“Yes, I meant it.”

He nods, doing a horrible job of looking like he’s not on the verge of bolting going off of the stare you’re pinning him with.

“Great,” he murmurs. He shifts, crossing his arms himself and leaning back against the counter. “I meant it when I said ‘love you too’…by the way.”

In response all you do is stare. Jason figures that’s fair and stays still under your scrutiny.

A minute of silence passes, only broken when you laugh a little and Jason can’t help but scoff at himself too.

“Fuck, you’re a mess.” You sigh, “I know, Jason. You wouldn’t’ve said it the first time if you didn’t mean it.” You raise your hand to make a so-so motion. “Run away maybe, but, you know?”

“Sorry,” he offers.

You shrug.

“Uh huh. So we talking about the Robin little brother thing now or…?”

“No, we can talk,” he cracks his neck, “You do deserve to know after everything with Dami and his sword.”

You cringe suddenly and Jason can guess why; waking with a sword to your throat will do that to you.

“I do, don’t I?”

“Hn,” Jason chuckles, but when he holds his hand out to you he’s holding his breath.

For a moment he’s really worried you’ll stare at his hand like it’s some kind of venomous snake and blow him off - he’s been distant, he gets it - but you only hesitate for a second before slipping your darker hand into his.

After that it’s a whole lot easier for you two to gravitate towards each other, colliding like two uncoordinated magnets in your haste.

Jason just holds you after that. Let’s the balm that’s rubbing his cheek against your soft hair and feeling your breathing so close with your arms around his shoulders wash over him as one of you slowly works y’all into a sway.

“The next time one of these things happen it cannot take three days for me to get an explanation, Jay.” Slowly one of your hands runs down his arm till you can tap the back of his hand, immediately he turns it over for you.

“I know,” he murmurs, “I’ll work on the confrontation thing.”

Your hand fits perfectly into his and squeezes once your fingers lace.

“You do that.” You press a kiss into his shoulder, drawing a low hum from him, and he can feel you smile against him before you continue. “I will also try making it more clear to you that I’m open to talk to, okay?”

“Yeah,” Jason agrees, pulling you closer and wrapping you tighter in his arms. He tenses up a little. “Is the stove—?”

“Stove’s good,” you squeeze his hand, “the lasagna noodles are still boiling so you’ve got a good eight minutes.”

You look up to smile at him - only somewhat strained - and Jason goes in for a short kiss. You’d said you weren’t going anywhere but he knows how overwhelming this whole thing can be.

“Alright, but you gotta promise not to freak,” he stresses.

You nod.

“Okay,” he clears his throat and makes sure to very carefully look into your eyes. “Most of my…’family’ are vigilantes. Including me.”

He leaves out the ‘sort of’ that he feels the need to tact on to the end of that sentence. He’s heaping a lot onto you as is and it wasn’t like you weren’t around when he first wreaked havoc on Bruce and overhauled Gotham’s criminal underbelly. He doesn’t regret it exactly, but it was still a point of contention.

“Right,” you nod before pausing. The way you look at him, mouth dropping open with a mixture of awe and something apprehensive, isn’t promising. “You’re not…Batman are you? Or one of them?”

Jason’s familiar with the theories that Gothamites make up about them - it came with the territory - but the way you dropped your voice to whisper that last question throws him. He would’ve never guessed you were such a conspiracist. Let alone a multiple Batmen truther. The theory wasn’t exactly wrong, but it certainly didn’t get the majority of the cowl switches correct.

He starts to laugh, only quelled after a slew of moments by the scowl that flashes across your face.

“No,” he chuckles. He wasn’t in the cowl for long at least. The grin he throws you manages to thaw that scowl at least a bit. “And thank god for small mercies.”

“Ah,” you tilt your head, “well - I mean as long as you’re not a rogue or like the Red Hood or anything then it’s not like it’s the end of the world,” you giggle to yourself.

Jason falls silent

When you look back to him, noticing the way he’s half cringing, your eyes widen and your mouth drops open.

“Shut the fuck up!” The beginnings of what might be a grin curve the surprised ‘o’ shape of your mouth as you take a step back. “You’re lying!”

Your eyes stay wide and your mouth fully forms into a wide grin. You smack him on the arm. Jason fights not to make a displeased sound at you taking your warmth away.

“You’re fucking lying— wait!” Your hands come up to frame your face. “Oh my god. What- what does this mean for our relationship?”

A sting goes straight up his spine and Jason surges forward to wrap his hands around your wrists, shaking his head.

“Nothing hopefully,” he says, “this doesn’t have to change anything if you don’t want it to. I’m still me, you’ll just be privy to a bit more of the inner workings of Gotham, but nothing crazy or too dangerous.” He grimaces. “The last thing I want is to endanger you.”

“Hold on. No, Jay, that’s not what I meant. I promise you this isn’t a deal breaker. Just…” you move to wave your hand still in his loose grip towards the sliding doors, indicating the rest of the city, “…I have something of a standing complaint with the Red Hood for blowing up my favorite bagel shop.”

“Oh?” He practically goes limp against you, letting go of your wrists after kissing the juncture of both to wrap his arms back around you. One corner of his mouth curls up. “Would you like to file a formal complaint?”

“I would, actually.”

He snorts, “In my defense it was a drug front for a group who was conspiring against me.”

You cast him a contemplative look before letting out a wistful sigh.

“Good bagels though.”

Simultaneously the two of you break off into laughter, hanging off of each other before sobering naturally as the timer rings and you’ve got to strain the noodles.

When you’ve got the water drained and are moving to set up the assembly station for the lasagna you throw him a grin.

“For the record, I think you would’ve made a great Batman.”

He laughs goodnaturedly, going over to add a pinch of sugar to the tomato sauce.

“Says you and nobody else but me,” he jokes.

“That’s alright,” you come up to press a kiss to his cheek from the side, using your hip to bump him out the way a little so you can slip one of the towels from the oven handles, “Gotham wouldn’t have been able to handle you, anyway.”

NOTES: Hope you enjoyed!

Funnily enough she’s technically meeting the Red Hood in this one to some extent, but I’ll probably write a more costume focused entry later on that is her fully meeting Red Hood similarly to how she meets the other Bats.

btw: if you’d like to leave a comment I’d very much appreciate it!

Tagged: @bandshirts-andbooks

[spxllcxstxr]

Kiss the Cook • M.B

(Gif not mine)

Request: could you do a mikey berzatto x reader blurb?? maybe some with the pair cooking together with some flirty banter/playful teasing sort of vibe:)) — anon

Summary: Mikey proves to be a distraction in the kitchen

Warnings: no pronouns used, food and cooking, mentions of donna, honestly its all fluff lmao

Word Count: 934

A.N: first mikey blurb and first bear writing! I hope you guys all enjoy!

•

It's noon when you finally wake up, Mikey's light blankets tangled in your sprawled out limbs. The house is quiet--too quiet, you realize while shifting out of the bed. Donna must be out smoking or somewhere with Lee. With Mikey not opening The Beef today, that could only mean he was downstairs waiting for you to wake up.

Knickknacks tremble precariously and wood creaks under your feet as you climb down the stairs.

You creep through the house until you get to the kitchen where Mikey is staring at the open refrigerator, staring into its white light.

“Lookin’ for something honey?” You ask, leaning against the threshold, arms crossed at your chest. You watch him jump slightly with a smile on your face.

He looks a bit sheepish, cheeks pink while one hand runs through his hair.

“I was, uh, lookin’ for something to make. For you.” He smiles and your eyes run over his relaxed figure.

“Why don’t we make somethin’ together, chef?” You wink, ambling over to him, planting a kiss on his cheek.

“Alright baby,” He kisses you quickly before he begins to pull things out of the fridge. “come help the master…”

You and Mikey easily work together, he tells you what to do and you do it. Maybe you’re not as skilled as Mikey Fuckin’ Berzatto, but you get the job done.

The chaotic nature of Donna's kitchen is gone; there isn't a barrage of egg timers going off nor is there the overwhelming smell of burning wafting through the room. All there is the sound of knives against the cutting board mingling with whatever soft rock is playing from Mikey's phone. For once, you can actually take a deep, non-anxiety induced breath in the Berazatto family kitchen.

“Can I trust you to start boilin' the water, babe?” Mikey calls out, eyes still trained on the onions in front of him. His tongue peeks out from the corner of his mouth in concentration, dark brows slightly furrowed.

Despite this, he seems at peace. Mikey's hands aren't shaking nor is his jaw unnecessarily clenched.

You lightly scoff at your boyfriend's teasing, abandoning your own task at the counter across from him. "I'm not an idiot, Mikey."

He hums, dark brown eyes lifting up from the counter and watching your form grabbing a pot from a cabinet.

"I'm gonna blow your goddamn mind with how well I can boil water, chef," You point at him, faking your seriousness.

“Alright, alright…” Mikey shrugs, lips upturned. “Prove me wrong…”

Getting the water to boil was easy, though it took longer than expected. You start throwing in things Mikey tells you to, staring at the water, silently praying nothing goes wrong.

Suddenly Mikey’s behind you, slightly swaying while looking over your shoulder. You hum in satisfaction.

His chest presses into your back, warm and calloused hands sliding across your torso in order to hug you closer to him. You close your eyes, smiling to yourself while taking it all in.

Mikey smells faintly of his cologne with hints of onion and various other herbs and spices mingling around him. He smells of home and the comfort of a homemade meal after a long day. He smells like your Mikey.

His beard tickles the crook of your neck, nose brushing over your skin as he presses delicate kisses just above the collar of your shirt. You giggle softly, the tips of your ears burning at his affection.

"You're supposed to say behind, Mikey..." You tease, placing your own hands on top of his own. Lightly your fingertips trace patterns across his skin. "No wonder The Beef runs like shit."

He ignores you, lips reaching your jawline and trailing across to the spot underneath your ear.

"Michael..." You murmur, titling your head up drawing his lips to your cheek. "Michael, I love you..."

His head dips lower, nose brushing against your own. Taking a quick peek you see that his own eyes are closed as well, the two of you living in the moment in his mother's kitchen.

Right now there's no drama with Donna or bickering with Carmy or the slew of questions that come with Nat. Just you and Mikey alone cooking; doing what the two of you love.

"I love you too, baby." Mikey whispers, placing a kiss right above the bridge of your nose. He squeezes your body once before pulling back his lips just an inch. "Your water's boilin' over."

You jolt, eyes springing open and widening at his words. The sound of boiling water ripping through the kitchen and overpowering whatever song is playing on the other side of the room.

“Fuck!”

Scrambling, you grab an oven mitt, carefully rushing to take the pot off the heat. A string of curses following you to the sink. Mikey chuckles behind you, offering no help whatsoever. His laughter fills the small kitchen and it would melt your heart if you weren’t doing anything important at the moment.

“And you said you were gonna blow my mind…” Mikey smirks, leaning against the counter. The corner of his eyes crinkle with laughter.

You throw your head back, groaning. “You were fucking kissing me and being a fucking distraction!”

He throws his hands up in mock surrender. “Well excuse me, princess, didn’t know giving you love and affection was off limits!”

“It’s not!” You huff. “But when I’m doing anything involving boiling water, you can’t be anywhere near me!”

“Alright babe,” He passes you, placing a delicate kiss on your forehead as he goes back to the cutting board. “Now get back to work, chef.”

•

[sara-scribbles]

The Littlest Dragon (Part 1)

Fandom: Twisted Wonderland Malleus Draconia/GN!Reader Summary: Your quiet life as a herbalist is disrupted when you take in an injured dragon Word Count: 5,768 Notes: I just really want a mini-dragon Warnings: None

Part 1, Part 2 Part 3

You almost mistake the bundle of black for a pile of cloth. Upon closer inspection, you can see shiny obsidian scales that shimmer in the light. The creature is larger than a squirrel but smaller than a house cat. Unsure what to do, you approach him cautiously but he doesn’t move.

Gently turning him over, your eyes widen. “A dragon?” Despite his small size, he has definite features of the powerful beasts just squished together in a smaller form.

A quick once over, you can see a twisted front leg and one wing bent at an odd angle. The creature's chest moves up and down but you can almost make out a pained gasp. Making a snap decision, you carefully wrap the dragon in your coat before rushing back home. Your half filled basket of herbs forgotten.

Bursting through the gate, you startle the three chickens resting nearby. The cluck loudly as you give a quick apology. Setting the dragon down on your table inside the cottage, you wash your hands before grabbing what you need.

Setting the armload of potions, salves and bandages, you get to work patching up the dragon. Thankfully the little guy stays passed out throughout the process. You clean and disinfect the wounds before applying salves. You create a makeshift splint for the front leg and wing. After finally satisfied, you slump down in a chair.

Watching the creature curiously, you decide to let him rest until he wakes up. You aren’t sure about the healing rate of dragons let alone such a small one.

Resting your cheek on the table, you gently stroke the top of his head. You’re fascinated by the two horns that curl back into his head. “I didn’t realize they could be so small,” you mumble.

Letting out a deep sigh, you take the dragon upstairs to your bedroom. You place a pillow on a chair in the corner of your room and set him down. Recalling a lesson on dragons, you bundle a spare blanket around him for a makeshift nest. Leaving the creature to rest, you return downstairs to clean up.

---

A few days go by but the dragon remains asleep. You periodically check in on him to change the dressings and reapply the salves. You’re happy to say the wounds are healing nicely. However, you’re starting to worry if the dragon will ever wake up.

It’s the middle of the night when you’re roused from sleep. Blearily opening your eyes, you meet the deep green gaze of the dragon. He stands on the pillow next to your own. His tongue flicks out making you flinch.

“Oh, you’re finally awake,” you mutter. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you sit up, which causes the dragon to step back. “How’d you even get over here?” You finally notice the bandages on the wing missing, but he seems perfectly fine.

He tilts his head to one side. Dragons are said to be intelligent creatures, you recall. “Do you want something to eat? I assume you’re probably hungry after sleeping for five days.”

Without waiting for an answer, you get out of bed and head downstairs with the little creature flying after you. You manage to make a simple plate of beef and vegetables. Watching the dragon attack the meal with such ferocity, you realize he must have been starving despite seeming so calm. Once he finishes the meal, he sits back with his claws on his stomach.

“Satisfied?” You chuckle as you notice food all over his face. He stays completely still as you clean his face.

Leaning an elbow on the table, you both stare at each other. “So… what do I call you?” He only lets out a gurgling of growls in response. “How about Tsunotarou?” He seems to nod as if your silly name is an acceptable one for a dragon.

“Well, it seems like your wing is healed, but your front leg still needs a bit of time. If you want, you can stay here until then,” you offer.

He says something you don’t understand once more, but looks satisfied as he decides to perch on your shoulder. “Alright, let's go back to bed. I have an early morning.” Yawning, you head back upstairs for some sleep.

---

You live in a cottage away from others. It was a gift from your late parents. Small but cozy, you don’t mind the solitude. In the front, you have a chicken coop with three hens. You also have a small barn for your goat, Phillis. In the back, your garden grows a few vegetables, fruits and herbs. The woods nearby provide you with wild herbs and berries. Anything else you need, you can go into town or ask Ace and Deuce to bring them.

As a herbalist, you create salves and potions, which you sell in town once a week. Unlike most herbalists, you lack magic. However, that’s never stopped you from doing your job. Plus you were taught by the best of the best, so the quality of your work is great. 

The usual day consists of you getting up early to feed the chickens and goat. Then you take stock of your inventory. After, you usually head into the woods to gather herbs. The rest of the day consists of brewing potions and salves, and tending to the garden. At night, you make dinner, make sure the chickens are in their coop, and do some light reading before bed. Rinse and repeat.

It may seem dull to most, but you enjoy the routine. Sometimes your day is broken up by a visit from Ace and Deuce, an adventuring duo, who you’ve known since school. They argue and fight, but ultimately work well as a team when needed. Their antics never fail to make your day entertaining.

Today when you get up, the dragon follows you. In the kitchen you make a breakfast of eggs and a fruit bowl. It seems Tsunotarou isn’t too picky on what you feed him as he gobbles everything up. After a quick cleanup, you and your new companion head outside. Your three chickens are already awake. They strut around the front yard as you grab a bag of feed.

“Alright, ladies, time for breakfast,” you call. Sprinkling the food, the three descend near you in a flurry of white and brown feathers.

Tsunotarou, who perched himself on your shoulder, leans forward watching in rapt interest. “Do you want to try to feed them?” you ask, holding the bag of feed up.

Using his good claw, he picks up a small handful before tossing them in the air. Most of the feed falls on the ground, though some does fall on the chickens. “Maybe aim a little more toward the ground,” you chuckle.

The three start trying to eat the feed off each other's backs, which causes a lot of squawking. One pecks another on the head rather viciously. “Flora, that’s not nice! Now apologize to Merryweather,” Scolding the chicken, she seems to deflate a bit before sulkily wandering off with a sad cluck.

Shaking your head, you set aside the chicken feed to grab food for Phillis. “Those two always seem to be fighting,” you tell Tsunotarou, who continues to watch the three hens. “Fauna is the mild mannered one of the group, thankfully. I guess she balances them out.”

Phillis comes trotting over the moment you're within sight. Patting her head, you scratch her behind the ears. “Morning, princess.” She bleats happily at the attention. The little dragon flies off your shoulder to get a better look at Phillis. She noses his stomach curiously as he reaches out to pat her on the snout.

“She’s a gentle one.” You smile as she nudges your side to hurry you up on getting her breakfast. “Okay, okay! I’m getting there.”

Once you give her food and water, you head back inside to your work room. You go through your current stock of ingredients while Tsunotarou flips through the thick tome of recipes. You wonder briefly if dragons can read, but knowing how highly intelligent they are, it wouldn’t be much of a surprise.

“That was given to me by my former teacher, Crewel. He taught me everything I know about brewing potions,” you explain as you check things off. “He was a tough teacher, but I learned from the best. I still have nightmares about that riding crop…” Not that he ever used it on you, but when he wanted to make a point, he made one.

You continue, “The potion and salve I used for you is for speeding up the healing process. It supposedly works on all living creatures, so I was hoping it would work on dragons.”

Tsunotarou leaves the tome to come over to your side. You shake your head as you reread your lists. “I seem to be out of a lot of stuff,” you mutter to yourself.

Pinching the bridge of your nose, you sigh. “I’ll have to make a trip into town.” Glancing at the creature on your shoulder, you regard him silently. His intelligent green eyes stare back as he stretches his wings.

“So, I either have to leave you here alone.” He bristles, eyes narrowing. “Or, you have to stay hidden until we get back from town.” You aren’t sure how people would react if they saw a small dragon on your shoulder. It would be better not to take the chance of possibly causing a commotion.

He agrees to your second option as he flies off your shoulder and lands in the satchel you keep hung up near the front door. His head pokes out when you don’t move. “I’m coming. I’m coming.”

You leave for the main shopping center with the dragon in tow. A bit nervous, you try to calm yourself through the walk. Tsunotarou pokes his head out taking in the scenery. At least someone is feeling fine.

The hustle and bustle of the town can be heard as you near the gate. The guards let you through without much of a glance. Here, adventures and merchants can check in the numerous guilds while stocking up on supply. It’s always busy as people move in and out. You only really stop here every few months to get supplies. By now, the shops you frequent are familiar with what you need, which makes shopping a little easier.

First stop is to pick up some herbs. Looking at your herb list, you easily weave your way through the streets. “I was dangerously low on four leaf clovers and died mandrakes…”

“Hello?” The greenhouse is quiet as you don’t see anyone. “Jack?” You tap the little bell on the front counter.

Finally, someone comes to the front. “Hey, (Y/N),” Jack greets with a nod. Though just a part-timer, he knows the greenhouse inside and out. 

Smiling, you point to your list. “Just need to restock a few things.” Handing the list over, he quickly looks everything over.

“I’ll be right back with everything.” He’s gone in a flash.

You feel Tsunotarou wiggle around in the satchel before poking his head out. “You have to stay hidden,” you whisper, placing a finger over your lips.

His head turns this way and that way before he retreats back into the bag. Just in time too as Jack returns with your things. Scratching his head, his ears twitch. “Uh, sorry we’re out of powdered death caps. We oughta be getting some next week.”

“That’s fine. I don’t think I’ll be needing them right away. Can you put me on the list to set some aside when they come in?” He leans over to hand you the other items. He pauses for a moment, his brows drawing together as his eyes dart around.

“Jack?” You inch back a bit. You can only hope he’ll ignore whatever he’s smelling.

Seeming to remember himself, he pulls back with an awkward cough. “S-sorry…” He hastily scribbles your name down in a small book. “That’ll be thirty-three for the rest.”

As you reach in your satchel for your coin purse, your hand brushes against the dragon hiding there. Freezing up, your gaze darts over to Jack, who thankfully is busy doing something else. You feel coins being pressed into your hand. Glancing inside your bag, Tsunotarou looks up at you expectantly. He flicks his tongue out a few times.

Counting the coins in your hand, you can’t help the grin spreading across your face. He had given your exact change. “Somethin’ up?” Jack inquires, noting the way you’re looking down.

Snapping your attention back to him, you shake your head. “Nope. Here’s the money.” You hurriedly hand him the coins. “I’ll see you next week, Jack.” Giving him a rushed wave, you quickly leave the greenhouse.

Once a good distance away, you let out a deep sigh. “I think that went well.” Opening your satchel a bit, you’re met with judging green eyes. “Don’t look at me like that! I panicked!” 

Shoving the bag of herbs into a corner of the satchel, Tsunotarou curls deeper into the bag. Letting the satchel bag flap fall back down, you return to the other lists you made. “Guess we’ll visit Sam’s shop next…”

Sam’s is busy as usual when you arrive. Pushing through the throng of customers, you make your way to the shelf filled with bottles. Picking out a few that you need for potions, you move on to the jars. By the time you go to checkout, you can feel Tsunotarou squirming inside the satchel. He pokes his head out every now and then, but only does it when there aren’t many people around. People are too busy with their own shopping, they don’t even glance your way. 

“Welcome back, little imp!” Sam greets.

You return the greeting with a wide smile. “Hey, Sam. Just the usual.” As Sam wraps each glass bottle in brown paper, you mentally do the math of how much you owe.

He carefully splits your items into two bags. “That’ll be one-hundred unless you’re looking for something out of stock?”

“No, I’m good for today.” You reach into your satchel and Tsunotarou presses the coins into your hand. “Here you go.”

Sam eyes your bag with interest but doesn’t say anything. “See you next time!”

You’re thankful that Sam doesn’t pry. The next stores are all uneventful. By the time you’re walking back home, you have an armload of bags. Your satchel can usually hold more, but the extra guest makes it difficult to fit anything beyond the herbs in there.

Once home, you put everything away before feeding everyone. Later, you’re stretched out in front of the fireplace with a botany book in hand. Tsunotarou is curled up on your lap while you read and take notes along the pages. Though you’re used to being alone, it’s like a familiar comfort to feel his weight on your lap. 

When it’s time for bed, you carry the still sleeping dragon upstairs. Putting Tsunotarou in the makeshift nest, you climb into bed. However, before you can fall asleep, Tsunotarou flies over with the blanket in his mouth. Standing at the edge of the bed, it’s almost like he’s giving you puppy dog eyes.

Rolling your eyes, you pat the empty spot near your pillow. “Fine, come on.”

He lets out a satisfied chirp. He wraps the blanket in a neat pile before laying down. Laying on your side, you chuckle while scratching the top of his head. “Good night, Tsunotarou.”

---

At the end of the month you’re preparing a few potions that need to be bathed in moonlight. Tsunotarou sets down the vials you’ve finished in the rack on the windowsill near the front door. You're grateful to have the extra…claws while juggling a few other things at once.

“One more glamor potion and that should be the last of the orders,” you tell Tsunotarou as he perches on your shoulder while you’re stirring the cauldron. “Thanks for the help.” You give him a little scratch under his chin. 

You swear he purrs with the way you feel his body vibrate. “I swear you’re a cat disguised as a dragon,” you chortle while bopping him on the nose.

He stares back at you before slowly blinking in return. “You can’t blame me for making the connection. You even caught a snake and left it as a gift,” you continue while sprinkling in some crushed rose petals. “Also, you shouldn’t do that again.”

The dragon grumbles deep within his chest. “It’s not that I don’t appreciate the gesture, but let's leave the wildlife alone.” 

Pouring the potion into a vial and sealing it, you hand it off to Tsunotarou, who takes it into his paws before flying off to put it in the rack. Taking a seat, you lean back with a deep sigh. 

Tsunotarou returns, taking a seat on the table. His front paw is fully healed and is no longer wrapped in bandages. Despite being back to full health, it doesn’t seem like he plans to go anywhere.

Suddenly there’s a commotion of loud squawking before the front door is thrown open. “Oi! (Y/N), we’re back!” Ace shouts while letting the door bang.

You tumble back in the chair and hit the ground. “Ahhhkk-ow!” Your head rebounds off the floor with a loud smack.

Two things happen at once. Deuce, who’s behind Ace, rushes over to help you up; however, he’s met with a hissing dragon blocking him that spits red flames at him. His sleeve automatically catches fire and the cottage is filled with panicked, confused screaming.

“Ahhhahhhhhck! Put it out!”

“Is that a dragon!?”

While the two run around screaming, you stare in a daze at the ceiling. Tsunotarou’s face suddenly fills your vision. He chirps a few times before you finally respond with a pat on his head. “I’m okay…”

Slowly sitting up, you notice the two idiots are now quiet. Deuce is no longer on fire, thankfully. However, they take in the sight of Tsunotarou sitting on your shoulder from a safe distance. You wince when you touch the already forming lump on the back of your head.

You huff before glaring at the redhead. “What did I say about suddenly bursting through the front door, Ace?! Can’t you knock like a normal person?”

“Well…I-I…!” Ace sputters unintelligibly before he jabs a finger at the dragon on your shoulder. “Forget about me for a second! What’s that thing?!”

Tsunotarou bares his teeth with a low growl. “We are going to have this conversation later,” you tell him before shifting gears. “This is Tsunotarou. I found him in the forest a little over a month ago.”

“Is he like a baby dragon?” Deuce asks, eyes wide.

Picking up the fallen chair, you shake your head. “I don’t think so. Anyways, baby dragons are much larger. Maybe he’s just a special type of dragon?”

Ace leans closer but pulls back when Tsunotarou snaps at him. “Kinda vicious. He almost barbecued poor Deucy.”

“You also busted in here suddenly. He probably thought you two were threats,” you point out. “Anyways, What trouble did you get into this time?”

“Psssh! Why’d you think we got in trouble?”

“Because you have an infected, bleeding wound on your arm, Ace.” Rolling your eyes, you go to your workroom before returning with a handful of potions, salves, and bandages. “Sit.”

As they plop down, you hand them each a potion. “We had a commission to take down some orcs that were terrorizing a small village,” Deuce explains. “But, uh, turns out it was actually a colony of orcs.”

“So you got beat up?” You clean Deuce’s cuts, which are mostly minor. A few do need some salve and bandages.

You move on to Ace, who looks the worse between the two. “We didn’t get beat up,” Ace grumbles. “We took them down! Aaaa-ouch!!” Biting your lip, you continue to dab his infected wound. 

“You two get into more trouble than anyone I know. Did you at least get a good reward?”

“Of course!” Ace pulls out a hefty coin purse and lets it fall on the table. “All in a day's work.” He grins smugly with his nose in the air.

Flicking his nose, you shake your head as he covers his face. “Don’t freely show that off or you’ll get mugged. Again.” Finished with his wounds, you place a small container of salve in his hand. “Use this once a day until everything is gone. It should, hopefully, not scar.”

“Um, (Y/N), can we crash here?” Deuce asks. He shrinks back when you give him a look.

Rubbing your temples, you sigh, “Fine. But one of you is gonna be sleeping on the floor cause I only have one couch.”

Ace jumps up. “Dibs!”

“Wait, you got the couch the last time! It’s my turn!” Leaving the two bickering adventurers, you head upstairs to find some spare blankets.

Tsunotarou gives you a questioning look as you rummage around in your closet. “They’re good friends. A little annoying at times, but they’ve always had my back.” You can’t count how many times they’ve slept at your place.

“They’re just as rowdy as they were in school,” you mutter as you head back down with two pillows and some blankets.

---

You can’t sleep. Tossing and turning, you finally settle on your back to glare at the ceiling. Ace and Deuce both snore loud enough to be heard from your bedroom. Tsunotarou had disappeared though you weren’t too worried. He would sometimes leave in the middle of the night, most likely to hunt, but he would always return by the time you got up.

Sitting up, you carefully make your way downstairs. “Maybe something to eat will help,” you mumble. You spot Ace hanging off the couch, so you know who lost the argument.

Just as you’re about to tiptoe around Deuce, you hear some loud clucking. Eyes furrowing, you wonder why the hens are up at this hour. Forgetting about your midnight snack, you head to the front door. Stepping outside, the air is warm but nice enough for early summer. Before you can move, you notice a figure standing near the chicken coop.

Not only is it strange to see a person at this time, but there’s also one other thing making you pause and rethink your plans. The moon hangs large in the sky and bathes the world in an ethereal silvery glow. The stranger stands there, head tilted upward to the sky, completely still.

And completely naked.

Slowly closing the door, you slide the deadbolt in place with a muffled click. Hopefully the naked stranger will leave. You doubt the deadbolt would keep anyone out if they actually wanted to break in. However, the act of using it at least gives you a small peace of mind.

Deciding the hens can take care of themselves, you head back to bed. You’re far too tired to deal with whatever nonsense is happening outside. As you drift off to sleep, your last thought is of Tsunotarou. You send a small prayer to whoever is listening that he’s alright.

However, you're woken by a loud crash. And then. “AHHHHHH!!!” “DO SOMETHING!!!”

Bolting out of bed, sunlight filters through the window. Despite feeling like you didn’t sleep at all, it’s morning. You grab the nearest object, a broom, before rushing downstairs. In your haste you nearly slip but manage to catch yourself. Wielding the broom, you’re ready to smack whatever intruder is causing trouble.

Instead of a naked intruder, you witness Ace trying to put out a fire with one of your spare pillows. Deuce is rushing over with a cup of water and dumps it on the flaming blanket. It goes out with a loud sizzle. Both boys let out a relieved sigh as you set the broom down.

“Mind telling me what’s going on?” you ask, not amused.

“Your overgrown lizard,” Ace jabs a finger at Tsunotarou, who is sitting on top of the table, “tried to set me on fire! He tried to murder me!!”

You glance at Deuce, who is still clutching the cup, then back at the frazzled redhead. “Did you do anything to him? Tsunotarou doesn’t just attack people out of nowhere.”

Ace rubs the back of his neck as he suddenly loses the fire in his eyes. “I…I might have said he got fat… And that you should get rid of him,” he admits. “B-But! I’m not wrong! He’s gotten bigger overnight. Soon he’ll be too big for your house!”

Your attention goes to the dragon, who sits patiently while watching the scene. You can’t deny that he’s gotten bigger. Now he’s the size of a large cat, possibly even bigger. “Do dragons usually have growth spurts?” you wonder aloud.

“I don’t remember reading about this at school,” Deuce says, nodding thoughtfully.

“Would you two think about the bigger issue!? He’s gonna grow too big and probably eat us all! That’s what dragons do!” Ace shouts, waving his hands around wildly. 

Walking over to Tsunotarou, you gently stroke his head. “You wouldn’t do that would you?” He gurgles happily, leaning into your touch. “See. He wouldn’t eat us. We’re not very tasty anyways.”

Ace slaps a hand over his face. “(Y/N), he’s a dragon! Not a pet!”

“I know. And dragons are highly intelligent, which means they can understand us.” You chuckle when he rubs against your arm. “I’m pretty sure if Tsunotarou wanted to eat us, he would’ve burned us all alive by now.”

Deuce shudders. “Morbid…”

“Oh yeah!” You completely ignore the last comment. “There’s possibly a naked stranger wandering around this area. I saw him standing near the chicken coop last night.” Tsunotarou makes a noise in the back of his throat.

“...what?” Both boys stare at you before scrambling for the front door.

“Pretty sure he left already!” They don’t hear you as they race outside still in their sleepwear. Lifting Tsunotarou into your arms, you huff, “You’ve gotten heavier too. I’m not sure if you’ll be able to fit in my satchel now.” He only nuzzles your face with his scaly snout.

Coming outside, the hens are just fine. Tsunotarou flies out of your arms to grab the bag of feed. Deuce watches in rapt interest as he throws chicken feed in front of the hens. “He actually helps out?” he asks, surprised. 

It really is a sight to see. “Yup. He’s been helping with small things here and there. He even hands me ingredients when I make potions.”

Once the hens are properly fed, he flies off to take care of Phillis. Despite her initial fear of him, Phillis seems to have gotten used to him. You two follow behind to Phillis's pen. Tsunotarou pats the top of her head while she eats.

“I never thought I’d see a dragon taking care of a goat instead of eating one…” Deuce looks both perplexed and awed.

“Hey!” Ace storms over with twigs and leaves in his hair. “What the hell, Deuce!”

“Huh??”

“I thought we were looking for the weirdo (Y/N) saw. Instead you leave me to do the work.” he grumbles.

Deuce gestures over to Tsunotarou. “I-I got distracted,” he sputters.

The redhead barely passes a glance over to the dragon. “Excuses like always, Deucy.”

“Did you find anything,” you ask, distracting Ace.

“Nah. Think whoever it was left.” Ace shakes his head.

Resisting the urge to say “I told you so” because he didn’t listen, you head back inside. “Come on, unless you wanna stay in your pajamas.”

While Ace gets cleaned up in the bath, Deuce helps with getting breakfast ready. “Hey, do you want us to ask Riddle to come over?”

You hand a plate to Tsunotarou to bring to the table.“Why?”

“To get some protective runes made around the perimeter of your place. Maybe it’ll keep the weirdo you saw out.” There’s a huff and light growl from behind him. “Uh… is he okay?” He inches away from the irritated dragon.

You scratch the top of Tsunotarou’s head, which causes him to almost vibrate. “Something wrong, Tsunotarou? Are you worried about the weirdo too?” You chuckle when he butts your arm with his head.

“You don’t seem too worried,” Deuce points out.

“Milk or orange juice?” You hold up two jugs.

“Milk, please.”

“I mean, I think if that stranger wanted to hurt us, he would've broken down the door. The deadbolt doesn’t do much,” you say while setting down glasses. “I’ll be fine, Deuce, so don’t worry.”

“...sure,” he agrees hesitantly. You can still see the concern on his face, but before you can say anything more, Ace comes down.

“Breakfast ready?” He slides into a chair looking around expectantly.

You hand him a bowl of fruit. “No thanks to you.”

Breakfast is a lively affair with the two extra guests. Ace and Deuce keep the conversation going as they regale you with their latest adventure in detail. It goes by far too quickly for your taste. Sure your days aren’t so quiet with Tsunotarou, but it does get somewhat lonely having a one-sided conversation.

“Well, Tsunotarou, it’s just you, me and the girls again,” you say with a deep sigh. You set him on the ground with a groan. “Okay, buddy, you’re a little too heavy to hold for long periods now.”

He lets out a pitiful sound before rubbing his head against your thigh. “Come on, let's get the rest of the day started.” As you go back into the house, Tsunotarou doesn’t immediately follow.

His sharp green eyes survey the area around your home. Tongue flickering out, a low snarl starts in his chest. Something catches his eye in the trees just beyond your fence. His back bristles as he opens his mouth. Green flames swirl around his mouth as his eyes narrow.

“Tsunotarou, are you still out here?” you call, coming back outside. Lifting him up, you don’t notice the way his gaze is focused on something else. “Are you mad that I can’t carry you?” you ask with a chuckle.

The dragon doesn’t respond as he rests his snout on your shoulder. As you close the door, his gaze never leaves the line of trees. There’s a flash of yellow before the door is firmly shut.

---

To your surprise Ace and Deuce return a few days later. And even more of a surprise, Riddle is with them. You nearly slam the door in their face when you see them. Nervously looking between the two adventures, you can feel heat prickling the back of your neck. Ace avoids eye contact while Deuce sheepishly mouths an apology.

Riddle is the first to speak up. “These two let it slip that you’re harboring a dragon. Being the head of the Heartslabyul Guild, I thought it would be prudent for me to check. Rule 134 states no unregistered magical creatures within 10 miles of the guild are allowed. They must be taken to the appropriate handlers.”

Casting dirty looks at the two, you open the door wider. “Please come in, Riddle.” You rather like having your door on its hinges.

As he enters, he looks around before his gaze zeroes in on the dragon resting on the couch. “It really is a dragon…”

Ace and Deuce carefully slink past you before you shut the door. “As you can see, Riddle, he’s not a danger to anyone.” You try to smile as innocently as possible.

He turns to you. “I realize the rules may not apply to you, (Y/N), since you’re not a part of  our guild, but a dragon is dangerous regardless of its size. Ace mentioned he grew bigger last night. Who’s to say he won’t stop growing and then lay waste to everything?”

Said redhead suddenly has a keen interest in your hanging herbs. “Tsunotarou isn’t like that,” you argue. “He’s never hurt anyone and he’s been living with me of all people.” The magicless human who would be a prime target for magical creatures.

Riddle walks over to the now awake dragon. Tsunotarou regards him with keen interest unlike Ace and Deuce. They both size each other up. Riddle’s brows draw together as he continues to observe him.

“Everything okay?” you ask when the staring seems to drag on.

“Did you know there’s a curse on him?” He walks around the couch to observe Tsunotarou on all sides. The dragon doesn’t move an inch but seems fairly relaxed despite Riddle being a complete stranger.

You and the two boys share a look. “No, I didn’t. Is that why he’s so small?”

“Maybe.” He’s unsure. “It’s old magic and very powerful. I honestly don’t know what kind of curse it is.” Standing in front of Tsunotarou once more, Riddle sighs while touching his head. “This is more complicated than I thought. I’ll need to do some research before trying to determine the curse. I might have to ask Vil for his help on this.”

Sitting on the arm of the couch, you stroke Tsunotarou’s head. “Are you cursed?” you ask him. His head bobs up and down. “How come you two didn’t notice?” Your question is directed at the two bean spillers.

“They probably wrote it off as the creature's magical powers leaving a residue,” Riddle answers. He gives them a stern look. “They’ll need to go through more training later.”

Both stiffen as the color drains from their faces.

“So what now?”

Shaking his head, Riddle glances at his pocket watch. “I need to head back to the guild for tea. I’ll look into curses and consult Vil about this as well. For now, just make sure no one else sees him. We don’t want people to think a dangerous creature is on the loose and panic.”

“Alright. Thank you!” At least he’s going to try and help. You know Riddle could have decided Tsunotarou was a danger and taken him away. 

When they’re gone, you plop down on the couch. Tsunotarou immediately climbs into your lap and makes himself comfortable. “Cursed huh?” You lift his face so you can look into his eyes. “Are you secretly a prince who got cursed by an evil sorcerer and only true love's kiss can break the spell?” you ask with a teasing grin.

He stares back before blinking slowly. Laughing at the ridiculous thought, you bop his nose affectionately. “I hope Riddle figures out your curse. I’d love to see your full form.” 

[anitalenia]

౨ৎ‧₊˚ ⋅ 𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙤𝙢 𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙛*𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙥𝙩𝙨 ( • 𝙙𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙘, 𝙛𝙡𝙪𝙛𝙛, 𝙣𝙨𝙛𝙬, 𝙨𝙛𝙬 • ) ₊ ⊹.𖥔 ݁ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ mummified, Egyptian pharaoh comes back to life millions of years later ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ mermaid boy (merman) takes you to his secret cove after saving you from a shipwreck ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ ghost /phantom takes care of chores while you’re gone and helps you with anything you need (making your bed, brushing your hair, skincare, etc.) ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ siren sings you her favorite song ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ incubus teaches you how to touch yourself for the moments he can’t do it for you ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ succubus gives you a makeover ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ cat hybrid loves when you scratch behind their ears ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ bunny hybrid being too shy to talk to you and ask for what they want ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ vine monster always blooms your favorite flowers ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ orc husband needing his tusks sharpened ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ orc husband being a cry baby when it’s just the smallest scratch you’ve ever seen ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ constantly buying werewolf boyfriend new clothes because he shifts in the ones he’s wearing and rips them to shreds ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ vampire boyfriend who only likes feeding from you ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ witch girlfriend that makes you remedies and herb mixtures to heal your wounds because you’re a klutz ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ siren afraid of the sea and spends her time frolicking in lakes (idc if they’re supposed to be in saltwater it’s fantasy 😜) OR fresh water siren ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ merman teaching you how to swim ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ alien being confused on human biology and how you’re able to feel arousal ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ orc husband making you the best beef stew you’ve ever had ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ cat hybrid leaving dead things on your front porch ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ demon boyfriend with limitless power and influence whose too shy to talk to you ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ minotaur never letting you leave his maze ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ Angel having dirty fantasies about the object (person) of their desires ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ big, beefy, nerdy werewolf boyfriend helps you with your science homework ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ plant monster bursting with beautiful flowers every time you kiss them ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ sleep paralysis demon taking your virginity ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ sexy circus freak fingers you in his tent after the show ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ monster boyfriend who doesn’t fit in your home and constantly has to slouch, his horns scratching your ceiling and head banging into the lights, constantly knocking things over ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ fire bending boyfriend / girlfriend always having such warm hands & hugs ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ ice princess whose breath comes out frosted and wears gloves as to not freeze everything they touch ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ demon king who leaves hell very frequently to visit the girl of his dreams. she can’t go down to his fiery domain / human or angel girl ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ vampire s/o who overindulges in blood and must go to vampire rehab 😜 ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ shy succubus who has never felt the touch of anyone ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ yandere guardian angel who kills any potential suitors until you realize they’re the only one for you ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ yandere pack of werewolves that kidnap you for themselves to use as they please ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ demon king’s butler who believes he can service you more than the king can ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ demon princes taking turns with their favorite maid ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ warlock boyfriend teaches you how to cook ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ vampire girlfriend squeamish about killing the little bunnies who hop in her backyard and would much rather kill people because bunnies are too precious ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ monster boyfriend who can read your mind but doesn’t tell you, just likes to listen to your dirtiest thoughts and act them out later ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ gothic hardcore werewolf girlfriend takes cute and precious bunny hybrid girlfriend to rock concert ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ buying your big bad alpha werewolf husband baby kittens because he loves cats ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ forcing your orc husband into wearing Christmas sweaters with you ⟡ ࣪ ˖

꒰ঌ ⋆.˚ bull hybrid boyfriend being stereotypically hotheaded and always getting into silly fights ⟡ ࣪ ˖

[stalkerofthegods]

Ares Deep dive

Ares is the Greek god and patron of many things, he is the edge of the sword while you hold the soft side, no god can be the god of war without the bloodshed, so don’t judge so quick, he is an amazing god, we love Ares here.

Herbs • Garlic, basil, buttercup, yarrow, ginger, anything with tiny yellow flowers, spicy stuff (ex- peppers, paprika), Water hemlock, Snapdragon, Poppy, Nettle, Magnolia, Ginger

Animals• Vulture, Colchian Dragon, serpents, barn owls, woodpeckers, dogs, horses, Stymphalian birds, boars

Zodiac • Aries

Colors • Red, black, and dark purple

Crystal• garnets, rubies, bloodstone, obsidian, red scoria, smoky quartz, red jasper, carnelian

Symbols• a helm, a shield, a spear and sometimes a sheathed sword, flaming torch, armor, palace, four fire-breathing horses 

Jewelry you can wear in their honor• Iron, armor

Diety of• masculinity, civil order, Battle lust, courage, City guards/police, Rage, Violent deeds, Fights, Murder, Manslaughter, Quarrels, cheese, dancing, rebellion 

Patron of• the Amazons, City defenses, City defenders

Offerings• Dragons, Dragon imagery, Dragon art, Strong dark red wine, Strong whiskey, Pure water, Black coffee, Black tea, Olive oil, Beef, Red meats in general, Cooked fat from meats, Blood from cut meats, Heavy spices, Spicy foods, Garlic, Red, black, and dark purple candles, Art or statues of Him, Statues of horses or dogs, Weapons, armor, and shields (ex- art, statues, toys, handmade.), Trophies, Spicy jerky, Sport drinks / protein shakes, Hand drawn or printed art of HimArt or images of dogs, horses, and vultures, Feathers from vultures, woodpeckers, or barn owls, Iron or steel jewelry, Red flowers (ex- roses), Thorns, Miniature or toy weapons and armor (especially helmets), Snake skin, Animal teeth, Write down your fears or successes and give them to Him, Medals and ribbons you’ve earned, Antiques, Photos of riots or past wars, hot sauce, Pork ribs, homemade meals, poultry, hare, venison, wolf hearts, chili peppers, lemons, green bananas, unripe peaches, batons, bullets, kendo swords, shields, military helmets, bullet-proof vests, military boots, military belts, dynamite sticks, grenades, lion pelts, shark teeth, ram skulls, explosives (handle carefully), Medals or Certificates, dog fur or dog teeth (ethically sourced), horseshoes, bull horns, war memorabilia, broken glass, spicy jerky or twiggy sticks, Carmel, sushi, stormwater, spicy salsa, Mexican food, chocolate or chia pudding, burnt matches, cigarette butts

Devotional• Create a playlist and listen to music that makes you feel brave/empowered, Donate to the Rape Crisis Center or other similar programs, Donate and support victims of war, Cook with garlic or heavy spices that you haven’t tried before, Try new things and don’t feel ashamed about doing so, Tell Him about your accomplishments, Tell Him about your fears, Learn about shadow work and try it for yourself, Learn about history, past wars, and past riots, Learn what they accomplished or failed to accomplish, Learn and educate yourself about the downsides of war and what can happen to the people affected by wars, Partake in combat sports (ex- martial arts, fencing), Exercise, Play some strategy games like chess, Risk, and Civilization, Stand up for yourself and what you believe in, write to your governor/mayor for things you want to see changed, attend riots, Pray to Him (ex-strength, ability to fight and defeat enemies, courage, to keep others safe, and help in a battle), go to a protest, learn first aid, educate yourself on PTSD, do unharmful things that give you adrenaline rushes (ex- amusement park rides, bungee jumping), watch action movies with him, pet a dog, Playing Strategy Games, Work on managing your anger, bones, go do axe throwing, a playlist that makes you feel, brave, energized and confident, keep track of your successes (this can be daily tasks, when you conquer them cross them off, and then offer the list to Ares), write down or draw art of your fears, go to a rage room, pray or meditate during thunderstorms, watch war movies and documentaries and play war/combat and strategy video games

Ephithets•Adámastos/adamastus/ἀδάμαστος/ΑΔΑΜΑΣΤΟΣ/ἀδάμας -unconquerable & indestructible, Ænyálios/enyalius/ἐνυάλιος/ΕΝΥΑΛΙΟΣ -war-God, Alcimus, Álkimos/alcimus/ἄλκιμος/ΑΛΚΙΜΟΣ/Adj - valiant, brave, Alloprósallos/alloprosallus/ἀλλοπρόσαλλος/ΑΛΛΟΠΡΟΣΑΛΛΟΣ- loyal to the struggle and to the souls who are engaged in it, Ánax/ἄναξ/ΑΝΑΞ -lord, king, Aphneiós/aphneius/ἀφνειός/ΑΦΝΕΙΟΣ -rich, wealthy, Arrectus, Árriktos/arrectus/ἄρρηκτος, ΑΡΡΗΚΤΟΣ -unbreakable, Brotoctonus, Enyalius, Hippius, Hoplochares/Hoplodupus/Hoplophorus,  Íppios/hippius/ἵππιος/ÍΠΠΙΟΣ -horseman,  Mægasthænís/megasthenes/μεγασθενής/ΜΕΓΑΣΘΕΝΗΣ/μεγασθενές -very strong,  Megasthenes/Mægasthænís., Ombrimothymus:See Omvrimóthymos/Omvrimóthymos/ombrimo hymus/ὀμβριμόθυμος/ΟΜΒΡΙΜΟΘΥΜΟΣ/ὀβρῐμόθῡμος -doughty, indomitable, Oplódoupos/hoplodupus/ὁπλόδουπος/ΟΠΛΟΔΟΥΠΟΣ -clattering in his armor, Oplokharís/hoplochares/ὁπλοχαρής, ΟΠΛΟΧΑΡΗΣ -rejoicing in arms, Oplophóros/hoplophorus/ὁπλοφόρος/ΟΠΛΟΦΟΡΟΣ - he who bears arms, Phrictus/Phriktós/phrictus/φρικτός/ΦΡΙΚΤΟΣ - horrifying, Polæmóklonos/polemoklonus/πολεμόκλονος/ΠΟΛΕΜΟΚΛΟΝΟΣ -he raises the clamor of combat, Polemoklonus/Polæmóklonos, Sceptuchus/ Skiptoukhos/Skiptoukho/sceptuchus/σκηπτοῦχος/ΣΚΗΠΤΟΥΧΟΣ -he who bears a scepter, Teichesipletes/Teikhæsiplítis/Teikhæsiplítis/teichesipletes/τειχεσιπλήτης/ΤΕΙΧΕΣΙΠΛΗΤΗΣ—he who storms the cities in battle, Vrotoktónos/brotoctonus/βροτοκτόνος, ΒΡΟΤΟΚΤΟΝΟΣ -the slayer of men.

Equivalents• Mars (Roman), Onuris-Anhur (Egyptian god), Tiu-Tyr (Germanic god),  unnamed war-god (Scythian god).

Courting• unmarried, but courting Aphrodite. 

Past lovers/crushes/hookups• Aerope, Agraulos, Harmonia, Otrere, Astyokhe, Demonike or Sterope, Kyrene or Asterie, Astyokhe

Personality• He’s a great father, and a great lover, I talk to a godspouse of his and they talk about how he calmed them and was always there. He’s a great father because I’ve talked to a person who their father is ares and he’s always there for them, he’s also generous.

Home• Mount Olympus 

Mortal or immortal • immortal

Fact• Ares was the only male greek god that never raped or sexually assaulted any woman

Curses• Routing armies, Cowardice, Death on the battlefield, Military invasion, Sacking of cities, Rebellion, Uprisings, Sedition

Blessings•Driving armies, Bravery, fighting strength & endurance,  Averting war (peace), Repelling invading armies, Maintaining civil order, Crushing rebellions, Restraint violent instinct,

Roots• Thrake, Ancient Greece.

Parentage• Zues and Hera

Siblings• Enyo (twin sister), Eris (sister), Apollo (half-brother), Artemis (half-sister), Athena (half-sister), Hephaestus (brother), Hermes (half-brother), Dionysus (half-brother), Hebe (sister), Heracles (half-brother), Aphrodite (half-sister).

Pet• four fire-breathing horses (Aithon (Red-Fire), Phlogios (Flame), Konabos (Tumult) and Phobos (Fear))

Children •ANTEROS (God of reciprocated love, son of Ares and Aphrodite), DEIMOS (God of fear, a son of Ares and Aphrodite.), ENYALIOS/Enyalius (A war-god son of Ares and Eris), EROS (God of love, a son of Ares and Aphrodite),  HARMONIA (Goddess of harmony, daughter of Ares and Aphrodite.), NIKE(The goddess of victory, a daughter of Ares), PHOBOS (God of panic, son of Ares and Aphrodite),AEROPOS/Aeropus (son of Ares and Aerope.), ALKIPPE/Alcippe (daughter of Ares and Agraulos), AMAZONES/Amazons (Warrior women of Assyria, daughters of Ares and Harmonia), ANTIOPE(daughter of Ares and Otrere), ASKALAPHOS/Ascalaphus (son of Ares and Astyokhe), DIOMEDES (son of Ares and Kyrene or Asterie), DRYAS (son of Ares), EUENOS/Evenus (son of Ares and Demonike, and sometimes the son of Ares and Sterope), HIPPOLYTE (daughter of Ares and Otrere.),IALMENOS/Ialmenus (son of Ares and Astyokhe), KYKNOS/Cycnus) (son of Ares and Pelopia or Pyrene), LIKYMNIOS/Licymnius (son of Ares most say his father was King Elektryon), LYKASTOS/Lycastus) (son of Ares and Phylonome.), LYKOS/Lycus (son of Ares who used to sacrifice strangers to his father), MELANIPPOS/Melanippus (son of Ares and Triteia.), MELEAGROS/Meleager (son of Ares and Queen Althaia, but most call him a son of King Oineus), MOLOS/Molus (son of Ares and Demonike), NISOS/Nisus (son of Ares, but most accounts say he was a son of the Athenian prince Pandion), OIAGROS/Oeagrus (a son of Ares but some say his father was King Kharops),OINOMAUS/Oenomaus (son of Ares and the Pleaid Sterope or Princess Harpinna), OXYLOS/Oxylus (son of Ares and Protogeneia), PARRHASIOS/Parrhasius(son of Ares and Phylonome.),PARTHENOPAIOS/Parthenopaeus (son of Ares and Atalanta, many say his father was Melanion or Meleagros), PENTHESILEIA (daughter of Ares and Otrere), PHLEGYAS (He was a son of Ares and Dotis or Khryse.), PORTHAON (son of Ares or according to others of Agenor), PYLOS/Pylus (son of Ares and Demonike.), REMUS (son of Ares and Ilia), ROMULUS (son of Ares and Ilia), TEREUS (a son of Ares.), THESTIOS/Thesius (son of Ares and Demonike or Agenor and Epikaste), THRASSA (daughter of Ares and Tereine.), DRAKON ISMENIAN (A monstrous dragon-serpent, it was a son of Ares and the Erinys Telphousia.)

attendees• DEIMOS & PHOBOS (The twin gods of terror and fear), ERIS & ENYO (goddess of strife, hatred and war), KYDOIMOS/Cydoemus (The god of the din of war), NIKE (goddess of victory), OTHER ABSTRACTIONS(spirits described such as Rage, Anger, Threats, Death and Valour)

Appearance in astral or gen• In ancient Greek art, he was depicted as either a mature, bearded warrior armed for battle, or as a nude, beardless youth with a helm and spear.

Festivals • Artemis Agrotera/Kharisteria , and Genesios, maybe.

Day • Tuesday 

Scared places• Odrysia in Bistonia, Thrake (his birth-place)

Planet• Mars

Tarot cards• Chariot & Emperor card

Scents/Inscene • Frankensince, Sandalwood incense, resin, burning wood (especially if Himalayan salt in thrown in since it reminds him of blood), and red sandalwood incense

Prayers• 

Prayer to Ares for the Safety of a Soldier

Bold-hearted Ares, bright-helmed son of thundering Zeus and noble Hera, well-honored god of war, any battle will you face, any foe will you fight, without fear and without hestitation. Ares, god of warriors, ally of those who risk their lives on the field, to you do soldiers offer their prayers. You know each one’s name, O Ares, you know their lives, you know their worth. Great Ares, I pray to you, watch over ____________ who heeded your call, who practices your art, whose name you know well, for s/he is one of your own who does you honor with each day s/he serves. Ares, I pray to you.

In general 

Bright-helmed Ares, strong of arm and stern of visage, firm of stance, unyielding of will, ever ready to face any foe, to hold the line against all who may come, to battle until the end. Ares, son of noble Zeus and wise Hera, cherished by golden Aphrodite, honored by those who call on you for strength and courage, in the north were you much honored in times of old, in Thrace and Thessaly were you held in esteem by those whose lives were harsh, whose world was stony, whose comforts were hard-won. Ares who answers the prayers of the despairing, I honor you

For Courage

Ares, fierce-hearted son of Zeus and noble Hera, full-famed you are as god of war. To you do soldiers pray when battle is most heated, when mettle is most needed. To you as well do we turn in desperate times, to you do we call for strength, for the spirit to endure. You understand the terror of struggle and strife, you confront it in every way. Ares, your courage is unquestioned, your might and your prowess unequaled. Ares, friend to those in direst need, I pray to you, grant me the nerve to face what must be faced, grant me the will to do what must be done, grant me the heart to forge ahead.

Links/websites/sources •https://greekgodsandgoddesses.net/gods/ares/

https://twelfthremedy.tumblr.com/post/624476009567289344/ares-offerings/amphttps://aspisofares.wordpress.com/tag/offerings/https://www.tumblr.com/warriots/622104378198933504/a-guide-to-ares-worship https://www.tumblr.com/warriots/622104378198933504/a-guide-to-ares-worship https://scarletarosa.tumblr.com/post/187742800571/ares-greek-god-ofhttps://www.tumblr.com/diana-thyme/722942201197363200/greek-gods-101-ares @enyalios-shrinehttps://greekpagan.com/category/prayers-2/ares/

BIG HELP TO

https://www.tumblr.com/tarotbee

Ares is the Greek god and patron of many things, he is the edge of the sword while you hold the soft side, no god can be the god of war without the bloodshed, he is an amazing god, we love Ares here.

I use resources, I do not own the info, and most deep dives have UPG (that I use in my work.) And I only take some information from sources. I am 14, this is my hobby, I am learning but I spent many hours and days on this, and I am always open to criticism. I have been doing worship for 5 years. Please know you can use the info, I do not sue, but I will take action if this work is used without permission and not put as a resource if used in any work. without permisson and not put as a resource if used in any work, for the public.

[chefkids]

A Chaos Menu is coming. Emphasis on Chaos.

Carmy's got non negotiables. The list includes: of the place, vibrant collaboration, no repeat ingredients, consolidation + speed, confidence + competence, in + out service, pursuit of excellence, details matter, know your shit, focus, something about perfect, somethings about tradition, something about boundaries, clean as you go, shirts perfectly pressed, and no surprises.

Carmy's focusing on details more than actual dynamics and Sydney's Bandana has got a big list of ingredients.

Carmy is truly going to be a whole new meaning to Chaos Menu, that is going to destroy everyone around them trying to keep up with them. Because as I said before, he still does not know how to do a chaos menu. He is so used to living in chaos, that menus are the only thing he knew how to control, but Syd wants chaos so he’s going to try to bring it. (and probably fail in the process)

Syd told him she didn’t want to be tweezing herbs on a dish she doesn’t care about, but if she’s constantly just making things for the sake of having something new, it's going to feel forced and uninspiring.

Syd and Carmy might be matching each others freaks, but everyone else didn’t sign up to be part of their psycho partnership. Richie will be tired of trying to keep up with their menu changes and expo mess. Tina is going to be so overwhelmed trying to manage all the cooks to keep up with a new menu every day. It’s also just throwing shit at the wall and seeing what sticks. In my experience most high level Michelin restaurant tend to stick to mostly the same menu for the entire season, because perfecting each dish takes time both in trial and error testing and in teaching the crew to able to make it perfect consistently.

Not to mention it’s EXPENSIVE to constantly have to source new ingredients. Which is what was going wrong with The Beef before Sydney stepped in, and she managed to create a great dish with ingredients they already had lying around that got them a good review. We know they’re going to be busy, if they don’t know how to keep operating costs down, they are going to drown the same way Carmy was drowning at the start.

Sydney believes in Carmy because she’s never gotten a star or retained one. But when she meets the Ever crew and sees how the keep up with their stars without tearing each other apart or destroying their lives or keeping insane and unmanageable standards and expectations, she will start to reconsider their partnership.

Especially if Carmy is the one getting all the praise, after the review incident where he didn't let her enjoy her moment. Sydney is going to draw a line at some point about what her non negotiables are, and if Carmy can’t meet them, she’s going to have to find someone or somewhere that will.

Non negotiables are typically things you set in relationships to create a healthy environment, but Carmy is using them to hold them against the entire staff. I think the only thriving aspect of The Bear that isn’t on fire half the time is going to be Ebra's sandwich window.

[allhailmeandmy]

So in curiosity I looked up the 72 demons names and such and read them a bit, as well as thought how many of them will be where and if every king will have 10 each and special guys have extra, will any kings share a vassal? Will there be nobles who don't serve a king? There likely will be more fallen angels like beleth, for example, phoenix, according to the wiki, is a fallen angel.

"Phenex hopes to return to Heaven after 1,200 years, but he is deceived in this hope. "

I've picked some I found interesting under cut. If anyone looked up the 72 demons as well and found any interesting and wonder what king they'd be assigned to add on, I think it's interesting

First up Gremory

A he/she!? Idk how pb will design the demons, but this one I'm excited for ( be ready for disappointment always happens to me for things I'm excited for)

This one's interesting, depending if they give him thunder powers, cuz some they did take the powers the demons had into characters and some not as much, so if furfur had thunder powers, he and leray... and the lying? Hmm, it could be a hades noble. I tell ya, but that's just a theory, a game theory!

Hmm... flauros what does "other fallen angels" mean? Are u one? Are u just knowledgeable in fallen angels? That of course could mean nothing when turned into a character

Shax gives a vibe of a tartaros noble, cuz u think It'd be funny, cuz yk mammon wouldn't care too much, while bimet would go crazy, enemy co workers, but bird motif is giving abyssos... most abyssos existing nobles , demons they're named after have a bird motif so... if so, bael would get another headache ( giving kleptophilia, but might be too predictable)

Decarabia is giving paradise lost noble due to the herb precious stones knowledge, "can change into all birds" is giving abyssos origin, but precious stone knowledge is giving tarturos, either way I think healer

Gaap as mighty as Beleth? Making me wonder... if they do make that important enough to whb, what would it mean? One sided beef with Gaap and beleth? Gaap idolising beleth? Well who knows, do wonder if "guide of four kings" would be taken to whb tho, a shared noble?

I can see people getting mad that an Amy is a male demon when Amy comes out, but as its here, the actual demon named Amy is a male . "Return to the seventh throne" is making me think, either a previous rules that's been thrown over, or like glasyalalobas vassago, where they want to throw over the existing king

Marchosias, this one's interesting, non fallen angel? How would that work? Maybe like Samael where he got betrayed by angels as he was being used? I'd say gehenna, but idk everyone seemed surprised at Lameas but it could've just been surprise at being betrayed, and not him being an angel , so who knows, especially since there's so much making gehenna being welcoming to all but so far everyone's shown to be a born demon?

And, since there's people who want a female demon interests ( like myself), and as all 72 demons are male, they could introduce other demons who aren't nobles, like lilith for example, she's not one of the 72 nobles, and I checked another thing, and in it being "female demon named Obyzouth" as well as " the 7 star sisters (a reference to the Pleiades)" according to Testament of Solomon Wiki

But that's just a theory! A game theory! For anyone who rear it go here, I'm curious, if you read the wiki, any demons yall found interesting? Have your own theories? Do share em! I think it's interesting

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

LET THEM FEAST

This piece was inspired by this Mickey Mouse cartoon as well as this early episode from Spongebob.

So tell me, do you wanna go?

The cafeteria doors parted, swinging open as any other door would—but to Fellow and Gidel, it was as if the gates to heaven were welcoming them. Humming chatter and the smells of delicious foods churned out from beyond. Deeply inhaling, tasting the aromas in the back of one’s throat, made their bodies light and floaty, as if hunger had made them weightless.

They followed a hoard of uniformed boys with trays, drifting to buffet stations loaded with dishes they could only dream of. Slabs of roast beef dripping with mushroom gravy, racks od lamb, game birds with crisped skin, fish glistening with herb butter, steaming stews with vegetables bobbing in a sea of rich broth, fluffy rice, cakes sliced wide and trifles stacked tall. The paper-thin slice of bread and beans they had for supper had never looked quite so sorry.

Gidel didn’t notice that his mouth was agape and slick with saliva until a cane tucked under his chin and closed it for him. Fellow pulled the young boy close, a hand on his arm as he wildly gestured to the waiting delicacies.

“Take a gander, Giddie! All that food’s free and ours for the taking!!” he chirped. “Ready your fork and knife, we’re going to eat like kings today!”

Arm in arm, the duo dove into the bar, grabbing as much as they reasonably could. Generous scoops of mashed potato, the biggest pieces of meat, plenty of sauce, the largest loaves. Gidel rushed about with an apple crammed into his mouth and Fellow snuck oyster crackers into his breast pocket (as a late-night snack).

While their plates piled higher and higher, the mob students grew more irritable. Elbowing them out of the way, snatching up popular itwms, and taking far more than their share had the tendency to invoke ire. The mobs casted dirty looks at Fellow and Gidel, others raising their voices at the kitchen.

“Oi, where’s the refill of tomato soup? I’ve been waitin’ for forever over here!”

“When’re the dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggies gonna be done…”

“I’m so hungry I could eat a whole horse. What’s the damn hold up?!”

“Be patient, boys!” a ghost chef callee back. He grunted as he hailed a vat of curry off of the stove. “It takes time to prepare the food.”

“They’re ravenous today,” remarked the lead chef. “Wonder what’s going on. We normally don’t have to prepare this much.”

By this time, Fellow (trailed by Gidel) had pushed his way to the front of the crowd. He set down his tray (the tower of food upon it wobbling, threatening to collapse) and waved enthusiastically at the chefs.

“Afternoon, gents! How’s it going? Looks to me like you’re hard at work feeding all these wayward souls.”

“Oh, um. Just fine, thank you.” The head chef blinked. He liked to think that he recognized all of the students and staff that came into his dining room, but he was drawing a total blank with Fellow and Gidel. “Er… Sorry, are you new around here? I don’t think I’ve seen you boys before.”

“Fufu, that’s right. We’re new to these parts.”

“They ain’t even students,” an angry mob student behind him piped up.

The lead chef startled. Worry crumpled his round, marshamallowy face. “Oh dear, not students? The buffet is only open to them and staff.” He glanced at Fellow’s pickings. “I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to return all that.”

Anger and annoyance shot through the fox beastman. Tch…! Those NRC brats, looking down on me! Why should they get to gorge themselves on this stuff while the rest of us beg for their scraps?!

He reached down and gripped Gidel’s hand, giving the young boy a reassuring squeeze. Gidel offered a sleepy grin back.

Watch this. I’ll turn this entire situation around and have them eating out of the palm of my hand.

He let out a theatrical gasp, then summoned his most charming smile. “My bad, I forgot to introduce myself! You see, I am a health inspector sent by the Department of Magic Education to evaluate your menu! Gidel here’s my trusty assistant.”

The leader of the ghost chefs scratched his head. “Huh? Is that what a health inspector does…?”

“Of course, or cooourse! All a part of the job description, my friend.” Fellow indicated his absurd amount of food. “They’re looking to implement new standards for magic school menus—and where better to look at as a model for reference than THE famous Night Raven College? The education it offers is elite, so the meals it offers must be elite as well! That’s why they’ve sent us to try one of everything, to evaluate the quality of your wares.”

Gidel bobbed his head. (He had little clue what he was actually agreeing with, but he agreed nevertheless.)

“Come ON, you don’t seriously buy this crap, do you?” a mob student groaned. “The old fart’s clearly lying!!”

Other voices joined him, but they all fell upon deaf ears. The head chef’s eyes sparkled, his pasty white cheeks rosy with excitement.

“Oooooh, why didn’t you say so sooner?! W-We will absolutely do everything in our power to accommodate your needs, Sir Health Inspector!” He turned to his kitchen staff. “Isn’t this so exciting, everyone? We’ll be the first group of ghosts to receive a fancy accolade after death!”

A murmur of approval weaved through the kitchen. The dining room, however, erupted into a fresh round of protests.

“You’re joking!!”

“That’s such an obvious lie.”

“How can you believe that bullcrap?!”

Keheheh, never underestimate the power of this Fellow Honest-sama’s silver tongue 🎶 I didn’t even need to use my unique magic to cut to the front of the line. Some people are just born suckers and stay suckers in the afterlife.

He smirked, giving a triumphant twirl of his cane. “Sorry, folks! You snooze, you lose. We get first dibs on everything~”

“Hah?! What’d ya just say to me?” A vein bulged on a Savanaclaw student’s forehead. He was about double Fellow’s width and rippling with muscle. “Like hell you are!”

“The way you talk is pissin’ me off!!” chimed in a Diasomnia student. He drew his baton and aimed it at Fellow. “I oughta shut you up for good!”

The idea was a seed, taking root and festering among his peers. Other students were producing their own magical pens, out of pockets and from inside vests.

Fellow paled, balking but keeping himself between the mobs and Gidel. “H-Hey now, can’t we talk this over? Violence doesn’t solve everything, you know!”

“YES IT DOES,” the mobs retorted—in unison for once. Hungry and angry, a terrible combination.

Gidel whimpered. No sound, but Fellow could sense it in the way the boy retreated into his coat. A free hand found its way to the small of Gidel’s back, keeping him upright.

Don’t let them see you like that. Weak, downtrodden. It’s letting them have the moral victory.

His grin widened. He was a fox looking to sink his teeth into unsuspecting prey.

“Why spend your youth grumpy and causing trouble? You should lighten up, live a little, laugh a little. Here, I’ll show you how. Just follow me! Come on to the Theater!! Life is Fun!!”

Fellow spun his cane, releasing a light shower of sparkles upon the crowd. They floated down, popping like popping on their skin. Eyes glazed over, twisted expressions slackened.

“Now then!!” Fellow, raised his cane like a baton, still spinning as he conducted his herd. He, poised as the ringleader. “Right this way, right this way, gentlemen! Let’s have a lively parade to the courtyard on this fine day!”

“The weather is nice today…”

“Coach said I need to get more exercise in.”

“I’ve been stressed about classes, I need to take this break.”

Marching—one, two, one, two—Fellow led the procession out of the cafeteria. He belted out a tune as he ushered students through the exit.

“Hi-diddle-dee-dee, actor's life for me!”

(Gidel pranced in and out of the line of students, reaching into pockets and retrieving miscellaneous items. Pencils, a keychain, spare change. He stashed them under his hat.)

“A high silk hat and a silver cane, a watch of gold with a diamond chain!”

When the last student was gone, Fellow made a U-turn and rushed back into the cafeteria, slamming the doors behind him. He dropped his smile, letting it shatter like a porcelain teacup and not bothering to salvage the remains.

“Sheesh, they’re finally out of my fur!” Fellow sighed deeply. “Those rotten kids really had to make me work hard for my meal...”

Gidel scrambled over to him, pulling out the various items he had clumsily pilfered. Look what I got! he seemed to say.

Fellow brightened, ruffling the child’s messy brown mop. “Atta boy, Giddie! We sure showed those snooty rich kids what for, eh?”

At that moment, the head chef bursted out of the kitchen juggling a tray of apple strudel. He was followed by several other ghosts, each carrying a new dish.

“Sorry for the wait, here’s the… Huh?” The head chef glanced around the nearly empty cafeteria, his brows knitting. “Where did everybody go?”

“Must’ve gone out for a stroll Fine by me, they’re letting us get right down to business,” Fellow laughed, clapping a hand on Gidel’s shoulder. “C’mon, that’s enough excitement for one day. Let’s dig in!”

[petermorwood]

Wow-Wow Sauce

For @redwineand12gaugeshells... :->

In fact that bottled sauce (and nervousnigels) no longer exists, and in any case its principal ingredients of (squints) horseradish and mustard are way off base.

Wow Wow sauce was meant to go with boiled beef, and since a major ingredient was the meat's broth *, it was more like a pan gravy made at the end of cooking, than something intended to go into / come out of a jar in the preserves cupboard.

* 1817 was well before stock / bouillon cubes, however "portable soup" was a Known Thing and could be a possible alternative. The recipe is specific about using fresh broth, but here's how to make portable soup, because You Never Know.

Real Wow Wow sauce had no hyphen, no sulphur, no saltpetre and definitely no grated wahoonie, though some "real" ingredients of the Discworld version - mangoes, figs, asafoetida, anchovy - suggest Terry was taking inspiration from labels in his own kitchen, such as those on HP Sauce, Worcestershire Sauce and Yorkshire Relish.

*****

Dr Kitchiner's "The Cook's Oracle" is available online from Gutenberg (the 1833 American adaptation) as well as a PDF of the 1822 UK Third edition from Internet Archive.

Here's his recipe - whose title, for extra interest, includes the original name for what became "Bully Beef":

The good doctor's "pickled cucumbers" would have been vinegared like cornichons or gherkins, not brined like dill pickles. In addition, pickled walnuts are easier to find than they used to be; even the Tesco supermarket chain carries them...

...as well as mushroom ketchup.

You'd probably still need to make the other herb vinegars and the shallot wine (based on dry sherry), but those are easy, just a matter of steeping the herbs in the liquid for a week or so then straining off and bottling the flavoured fluid.

Another useful ingredient for period cooking is anchovy sauce, which is less, er, emphatic than full-on anchovy essence. You could always scale up if you like the taste.

This also has the advantage of being a pleasant - if you like fishiness - sauce in its own right; try a teaspoonful in a tablespoonful of EV olive oil then tossed with hot pasta. Yum...!

This one's from the same company as the mushroom ketchup and the packing clearly emphasises their "period-ness" (is that a word?) The anchovy sauce is a bit harder to find, but well worth tracking down.

*****

Finally, here's a Youtube short of Wow Wow sauce being made and sampled. It looks entirely acceptable, like a cross between a thin chutney and a thick sauce, and would be, to use Dr Kitchiner's own word, "piquante".

As a side-note, that by-play with tinned corned beef was a bit pointless, since its texture and flavour are both utterly unlike beef that's been slowly, gently boiled (simmered, TBH) with halved onions, carrots, root veggies etc.

Use shin or silverside; the magic tenderiser for those cheap cuts is Time (or a pressure cooker) - though you can also add a sprig or two of Thyme if you want...

[misskittyhart]

Kitty smiled softly following Alastor to the quaint little kitchen. “This will be wonderful. I must say, thank you so much for your hospitality”

Heading to the fridge she began to check what was available. Chicken, beef, sausage, some various vegetables. A plan formulated in her mind.

She selected the chicken thighs, sausage, bell pepper, butter and garlic. Setting them out she went to the pantry and pulled together an onion, rice and various spices.

She set to work expertly slicing the chicken from the bone, and trimming up fat. She wasn’t going to toss that good fat though. Putting a pan on she tossed the fat with butter, garlic, herbs and spices, making a fatty compound. When it was together enough she tossed in flour, and a bit of chicken broth letting a thick roux form.

Gumbo was on menu tonight. It had been far too long. While the roux set to browning, she pulled together some things to make corn bread, she always sweetened with honey, then added depth with garlic and spices. The little fox moved about the kitchen almost like it was a dance. Humming softly to her self tail swaying mindlessly.

@radio-demon-on-air

[short-black-diamond]

loved the sae and kaiser scenario about the reader getting hit on please may i request: barou rin and karasu for the next one (female reader)

THANK YOU

yessss let's do this! Also thank you for putting in the gender my love. Also how were you able to put in three of my favourite characters?? Like are you a mind reader or???

Warnings: Barou's is a lil suggestive and I'm surprised by that myself, Rin's a lil angsty but just a tiny bit, Also Karasu is jelly and protects you

---

"You belong to me." ...part two

part one

Barou:

He can't believe it actually happened while he was there. The fucking audacity the guy had to approach you, his beautiful, gorgeous and perfect queen, and that on a saturday morning?

You guys were about to go on a camping trip and wanted to buy a few things on the way, but that also included food because Barou wanted to eat something fresh and healthy.

And it also just so happened that you were looking at eggplants, thinking that they'd go well with tomatoes, shicken breasts, and beef.

That guy approached you then and smirked at you. "You comparing them, sweetheart?", he asked, and Barou had tickmarks appearing on his skin. but you just said yes. "Also don't call me that, I am-"

"You know? None of these can please you like I can.", the guy then declared with a seductive smirk. You cringed before you pointed to Barou.

"I don't need yours or any of these eggplants when I have my boyfriend right here. And also,", you added, "my boyfriend has the biggest cock in here, so shut it and fuck off, you donkey."

The guy scoffed in annoyance before scrolling away. Barou huffed proudly when you told the guy off and called him a donkey. However, he was still mad at the fact that a peasant dared to approach his queen.

"What does that guy even think...!", he growled, wanting to teach him a lesson, but you just grabbed his arm. "C'mon my love, he's gone, and I don't really like eggplants anymore. Let's go to the herbs isle."

Barou nodded at you before he smirked. "I've got the biggest cock you said?", he quoted slightly, and you blushed. "I-I've tried to defend myself, you know?!"

"So the first thing you think of me is my dick?", he asked in a low chuckle. You shook your head as you two went to the other isle while you tried to explain yourself.

Rin:

You two were on an appointment because you had to get you new vitamins and you needed a receipt. Rin waited in the waiting room for you as he looked through his phone.

When you came out of the doctor's room, Rin stood up and followed you to the receptionist. A handsome guy was sitting there, and he looked at you with a blush.

Rin noticed that, but wanted to see how you'd react. He stood there with a little space, making himself nearly invisible as he stood right behind you so neither you nor the guy behind the counter could see you.

"Say, are you single?", the guy asked with a polite smile. You frowned at him before you turned to the waiting room. 'Did Rin go..?', you thought before you answered. "No, I'm in a happy relationship."

The guy pouted cutely. You'd for sure give him a chance if you weren't already together with Rin, and he was the best option to have.

"Really? Huh, you're a really pretty woman, and I didn't see a ring on your finger, that's why-", and he stopped talking when you pulled at your necklace. A ring was attached to it.

Rin blushed heavily and played with the thought of spawning right up next to you to declare that he was your lover.

"Is this proof enough?", you asked. "If yes, then can I have my receipt? I'd like to leave now."

The guy blushed again, but this time in embarassment before quickly arranging your papers and giving you the receipt before apologizing with a red face.

You shook your head. "It's alright. Have a good day!", and with that, you went out. Then you called Rin.

"Rin? Where are you?", you asked, looking around. You were sad at the fact that he "left". But, you heard his voice from your other ear, not the one which was pressed against your phone.

"Right here.", he answered softly before hugging you. You huffed. "Where were you? I just got hit on!"

"I was behind you the whole time...I wanted to see how you'd react...and w-well, you did just fine..", he mumbled as he buried his face in your neck, blushing furiously at the memory of two minutes where you conversed with the guy and proudly showed of your promise ring which Rin gave you.

"Of course. There's no one else besides you who I love, Rin.", you answered honestly before you kissed the side of his face.

"Wanna go to the apotheke with me?", you asked with a smile, and this time, Rin took your hand instead of staying behind you.

Karasu:

You guys were at the beach, along with his teammates. Karasu introduced himself as you best friend (ouch), because he wanted to keep your guys' relationship a secret from his friends, for they would tease him relentlessly.

But, he also took the risk of having to watch you get hit on by Otoya and Oliver, who both tried to seduce you by standing on either side of you.

"Say, sweets,", Otoya started, looking at you with a smirk. "Are you really single?", he asked as he ogled at your body. You felt uncomfortable.

"I..", you started before Oliver cut you off, daring to touch you. His hand went up to your waist as he pulled you closer to himself, creating some distance between you and Otoya.

"Seriously? Asking if she's single right away? Bad move, Otoya.", Oliver remarked before he looked at you with a reassuring smile. "Please don't mind him, he's just a pervert."

You felt even more uncomfortable, but before you knew it, Karasu's arms slung around you as he stood behind you. You looked up with a blush.

"Let me correct myself,", Karasu seethed as he glared at the two cheaters/fuckboys. "____ is my girlfriend.", he delared, and you blushed with a smile.

Oliver and Otoya only looked at him with raised eyebrows. "Damn, I wanted to suggest for me and ____ to go to a secured place and-" "Not happening."

"Heh, I would suggest a threesome-" "Nuh-uh!"

---

Bwahahaahaahah why is my mind so dirty...

[thatweirdfandom]

my fix it one piece headcannons

(besides hot gay sex, proper skin tones ((this is also in the fix it)))

-sanji gets trapped on a rock for his timeskip- this is how he learns to skywalk and ends up on kambaka

just imagine one of the main horrible things that has ever happened to him and he’s back. how long is he going to have to wait? he’s stuck for how long? no. not this time. he spends almost a month there until he sky walks to the island

he doesn’t even have time to complain or whine about the people and the front he would put on. he’s safe and that’s what matters. they take care of him and he comes to have a depose understanding and appreciation for them

he wears the clothes because he doesn’t have anything else- but he learns how to sew and makes the best dresses and outfits later on

- ussop is actually the most comfortable out of everyone with his sexuality. he has THE RIZZ he picks up anyone and everyone just being his cute flirty self

- post skip (and i’ve mentioned this before) sanji, chopped and ussop all working together one meals, and medicine!

ussop island and knowledge of plants- he brings back and is able to grow medicinal herbs, cooking herbs ect ect

sanji has left over parts to his food that can’t be cooked so he learns how to turn them into herbs, soaps, practical things

- franky only upgraded his body again because it was failing him post skip. he got by in his city after the accident- but continuing in his form with all the battles, the straw hats get into only weared down what he had for a body

- robin and sanji would absolutely have met at some point during the timeskip. iva being a top leader in the revolutionary army? hell yeah.

i imagine that robin is also the first one to know about germa and sanjis connection he would have told her. they confide in each other about how they have a similar upbringing

- i also imagine germa being on the revolutionary army’s radar for their experiments, and how this could tie into ceaser earlier that the kid experiment was actually another way for judge to test things out

it just would have made more sense to bring it up earlier/ that doffy had a connection to judge too being a ex world noble teaming up with a next higher power that has a lot of pull and rank and aligns with his ideals

- look i have a lot of beef w sanji because he’s my blorbo but i would have loved if they actually included some lead up more to his tragic backstory pt2

LIKE THE EYEBROW SWIRL only the vinsmokes have this!! how tf didnt law notice this being a goddamn fanboy

- chopper shedding- he grows fur like a sheep and you gotta shave him

i just was ussop to make beds and coats from the fur

- sanji making special meals that have stat boosts like how chopper does a rumble ball they could work on something similar esp since luffy dries up like a raisin

pt 1/?

[breelandwalker]

Sneak Peek - Spoons In Spades

At a little distance he saw a fire, and beside it there sat three giants, busy with broth and beef. They were so huge that the spoons they used were as large as spades, and their forks as big as hay-forks: with these they lifted whole bucketfuls of broth and great joints of meat out of an enormous pot which was set on the ground between them.

- Niels and the Giants (The Crimson Fairy Book)

[img src]

-----

Intent: To give oneself additional “spoons.”

Ideal Timing: This charm can be made at any time.

Materials:

Spoons

Large Jar

Cotton Balls

Herbs: Hyssop, Rosemary, Thyme, Juniper Berries

When I asked my readers what sort of spells they'd like to see in this second volume of fairytale-inspired spells, one of the most strikingly popular responses was, "Is there a spell to give me more spoons?"

If you're not familiar with the term, "spoons" or spoon theory is a metaphor which describes the reduction in mental and physical energy experienced by people who are disabled or chronically ill, with spoons used as a unit of measurement to represent how energy and motivation must be rationed throughout the day to accomplish necessary tasks. Spoons are only replenished through rest or sleep, so once a person runs out of spoons, that's it for their day. 

The term was coined by Christine Miserandino in her 2003 article "The Spoon Theory," in which she uses dinnerware to demonstrate to a friend how living with invisible chronic illness required careful daily planning and prioritization, and how even with the best intentions and efforts, tasks are often left undone due to a lack of energy or an increase in pain. The term has since been adopted by wide sections of the online community in relation to struggles with disability, chronic illness, or mental health, as a descriptor for daily energy and motivation levels, i.e. "I don't have the spoons for this," or "After a full day at work, I have exactly one spoon left, and I need it for laundry, so going out is off the table."

As someone who regularly battles ADHD, anxiety, executive dysfunction, migraines, and depression, I'm a big fan of spoon theory, largely because it makes those invisible daily struggles, which so many of us have, much easier to visualize and explain. So in honor of all my fellow spoonies, here is a spell to help you gain those critical extra spoons.

For this spell, you'll need a fair-sized jar, some healing herbs, and a bunch of spoons. You can use plastic spoons or metal ones, if you happen to have spare silverware lying around. Use as many or as few spoons as you feel you need. If you need more spoons than can readily be acquired, you might draw or print out pictures or spoons and use those instead.

Place the spoons in the jar with a big handful of cotton balls. Apart from their mundane medical and cosmetic uses, cotton has healing magical properties and also represents the comfort that may feel lacking on low energy or high pain days. If desired, add several pinches of Hyssop, Rosemary, Thyme, and Juniper Berries, or a sachet containing the herbs if you'd rather keep things neat.

Close the jar, give it a big hug, and say:

I bless this jar and spoons And ask for the strength to function; And when I need a helping hand, These extra spoons I'll summon,

Set the jar aside somewhere safe. If desired, you might want to label it. You don't want anyone borrowing your magical spoons for their cereal, after all. When you need an extra boost to help you get through the day, simply open the jar and take out a spoon. You can carry the spoon with you, place it on your altar, or discard it to activate the charm.

Please keep in mind that performing this sort of magic should always be accompanied by appropriate medical and self-care measures. Magic isn't going to cure a chronic illness or permanently alter your brain chemistry. But it can help you cope with the symptoms and give you that all-important push to get yourself through the day. Stay strong, witches!

-from the forthcoming book, The Sisters Grimmoire, Vol. II; © 2021 Bree NicGarran

(If you'd like to check out more fairy-tale spells or any of my other published works, please visit the Willow Wings Witch Shop!)

[serendipityandbenevolence]

Baizhu x Reader (Arranged Marriage)

I know this is a bit (lot) different to what I normally post on this account, but I am a SUCKER for arranged marriages in fanfic, so I am choosing to disregard my sagau roots (not permanently dw) It’s a bit out of my comfort zone, but I really hope it comes out well :)

Contains - You getting injured, you and baizhu having beef (enemies to lovers fr), you and baizhu not realising that you are engaged to each other, arranged marriage (duh) your dad kinda sucks tbh

It took you rolling your ankle to realise how bad an idea climbing a mountain unprepared was. Granted, when you had started climbing the mountain, you had thought you were prepared. Your clothing was (somewhat) practical, you had stolen a pair of your father’s shoes that he used when hiking and you had found a nice leather satchel to hold your snacks and hand shovel. 

It had been fine at first, nothing more than a pleasant hike, with bird chirping and a soft breeze whistling through the trees. But with every step you took, the path became steeper, the sun became hotter and the god-damned shoes you bothered from your father hurt more. They had seemed a bit large when you first put them on, but now it felt like you were going to trip over them with every step. 

Your clothes weren’t faring much better. Your good, practical clothing had caught on nearly every single branch and shrub you passed. You would have to hide them when you got home, because you did not want to have to explain to your parents exactly how your clothing got so tattered and torn. The only things that hadn’t let you down was the satchel and your snacks, although the snacks were long gone now, despite not even reaching the top of the mountain.

Looking back on the moment, it seemed almost like one of those comedy performances, that wandering artisans performed in the town square. It was ironic, truly, how quickly everything fell apart. A single stone in your path, that you hadn’t even noticed until you were stepping on it. Your father’s shoes skidded off it, causing your ankle to twist painfully and send you careening into a nearby bush, your shirt tearing even more as the branches scraped your skin. 

And there you lay, facedown in a bush in the middle of nowhere, close to the peak of a nearly abandoned mountain trail, with nothing but a satchel and a sprained ankle. 

All of this for a fucking flower.

It was silly, you were aware of that. Your mother had told you stories about a kind of flower that only grew on this particular mountain, whose petals formed a distinctive heart shape, and which was said to bless whoever received one with true love. It was cheesy, yes, but that didn’t stop many young men and women from climbing the mountain in order to pick them for their fiances. But as the years passed, the flowers became more and more sparse, thanks to the droves of hopeless romantics picking them all. And now, they are said to only be found at the very top of the mountain, where the lovers were too scared to climb.

You didn’t even know if Baizhu liked flowers. 

You’d never met him, which was surprising considering how long he’d been a client of your father. Your father, a renowned supplier of medicinal herbs, was thrilled when Baizhu first began working with him. Prior to that, all his business had been to local doctors and healers, but having a client in far-away Liyue Harbor excited him, especially a doctor of such a stellar reputation. 

You almost felt like you did know him, with how much your father talked about Baizhu. Every shipment of goods that was requested meant another long monologue over the dining table about how fortunate he was to have such a consistent and well-paying client. You almost asked your father if HE wanted to marry Dr Baizhu, but you thankfully refrained. 

You knew your father had been dropping hints to Baizhu for a while now, about how he hoped his child would be married soon, about how Baizhu surely must be so lonely without a spouse, about how Baizhu really just felt like he was part of the family already. What you hadn’t expected was for Baizhu to accept.

And now, here you were, a week out from your wedding and nearly passed out on the side of a road, trying to get that god-damned flower. 

There was no way that the situation could get any worse.

“Oh dear! Are you alright?”

Or maybe it could. 

You truly had the worst luck. How was it that during the most embarrassing moment of your life, a person had to appear? This was an abandoned trail! 

“Please … just leave me here. I’m already contemplating my life choices and regretting the actions I’ve taken to get here, my pride can’t take another hit.”

“I really… can’t just leave you here, you know that, right?” The voice, which you could now identify as male, sounded like it was trying to hold back laughter, while also truly sounding concerned.

“I assure you, you can. Please do. Keep continuing on your way.”

There was silence for a moment, and you almost allowed yourself to hope that whoever this man was had left, until you felt a pair of hands grab your shoulders and pull you out of the bush, depositing you in a rather undignified heap on the ground.  

“My sincerest apologies about your pride. Are you injured?”

You sighed and made your best effort to fix your hair, attempting to look less like you just fell into a bush. Your saviour had the audacity to look perfectly put together, with barely a hair out of place, despite having just hiked the same distance as you. Though he also looked far more prepared, with shoes that actually fit and an entire bag filled with supplies.

“Only the aforementioned pride and my ankle,” You sighed, looking down at the already bruised and swollen skin, then up at the nearly vertical path ahead of you.

“I truly hope you don’t plan on continuing to climb with that ankle of yours?” He questioned, squatting down to get a better view at your injury, laying a gentle hand upon it.

You chose to ignore the question, still hoping to find a way to get to the top of the mountain, instead taking the opportunity to stare at the man. He had the most intriguing golden eyes, with slitted pupils like a snake, which were sharply fixed on your ankle.

“Your lack of a response speaks wonders, so let me rephrase. You will not be continuing to climb with that ankle of yours.” His eyes met yours, looking for any argument.

“And how do you plan to stop me?”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For a man who initially seemed so polite, he sure had a way of getting on your nerves. You’d spent the first 10 minutes of him carrying you back down the mountain (over his shoulder!) trying to convince him to put you down and when that hadn’t worked, you’d settled on silent treatment. But even that was testing your patience, you’d become tired of watching the sun creep towards the horizon, of listening to the birds singing up above, of resisting the urge to ask him what hair products he used to make his hair so silky.

“So…”

“Oh, you want to make conversation now? Finally given up on ignoring me?” He laughed at you, making you grit your teeth.

“Alright, I get it! You’re acting in my best interests by not letting me continue climbing the mountain, you don’t have to act all high and mighty about it!” You cut your angry tirade off with an annoyed huff, turning your face away from him.

“Why were you even climbing up there to begin with? It’s certainly not a beginners trail.”

“Oh, uhm, you know…”

“I certainly don’t know, which is why I’m asking you, but I appreciate the faith you have in thinking I can read your mind.”

You smacked his shoulder once, then a second time when you noticed he was laughing.

“But seriously… why?” He turned to face you, eyes searching your face for some sort of answer, before sighing and turning back towards the path.

You were silent for a long moment before remembering that this man had seen you half-knocked out in a bush on the side of a road. Your dignity was long gone.

“Don’t mock me for it, but I was going to try and find one of those flowers…”

“The True Love’s Bloom?”

“Yes and don’t you dare make fun of me for this, I get married in a week and I’m emotionally sensitive.”

“I wouldn’t dream of hurting your feelings and anyway, that’s what I was looking for as well.“ 

It took you a moment for it to sink it, before you turned to look at him.

“Really? I didn’t take you for the romantic type. Which poor soul got roped into marrying you?”

“I could say the same to you. Here I was, being nice to you and you repay it by insulting me? I’ll have you know, I was the one who got roped in. I think I would’ve had assassins sent after me if I refused one more time.”

You laughed and turned back around, but as you did, a small alcove in the nearby rock caught your eye. It was becoming darker by the second, but even with the fading light you could make out the shape of…

“Over there!”

The man paused and gave a sigh.

“This better not be a ploy to get me to put you down, so that you can do something potentially life endangering again.”

“The flowers! Over there!”

He turned his head and gave a small laugh of surprise as he spotted them too.

“Well, what do you know? Maybe being forced to carry you back down this hill was a blessing in disguise?” He wandered over to the sheltered patch of dirt, where, hidden from most prying eyes, were two perfect flowers.

He placed you down next to them and began rummaging through his bag, pulling out two shovels.

“I’ll have you know that I actually brought a shovel, I don’t need your equipment!”

“Really, how surprising. Did you bring a pot as well?”

“...”

“...”

“... can I borrow one of yours?”

“Well, I’ll have YOU know…”

And as your bickering echoed across the mountaintop, bringing life to the abandoned trails of a once vibrant mountain, the flowers almost seemed to grow just a little bit more.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Baizhu, what’s that flower sitting over by the window? I’ve never seen anything like it before?”

“Ah Traveler, you have a good eye! It’s called True Love’s Bloom. However, those are actually two flowers. My spouse and I planted them in the same pot when we got married all those years ago and they have grown together over time, becoming so intertwined we can’t separate them. I like to keep them close to me at work, to remind me of my dearest.”

“Your spouse? I didn’t know you were married!”

“You didn’t? I could’ve sworn I had mentioned it? Well then, I shall have to tell you the story of how we met. It all started with them stupidly trying to climb a mountain…”

Guys, this was so much longer than I intended wtf. This was supposed to be a SHORT STORY to go with two other arranged marriage stories. I seriously need to throw my plans out the window at this point. Anyway, I love writing sassy characters, even though im shit at banter, so hopefully this is good/funny?