#Watched Succession. AND got all my shit done for my critique group

[lordsardine]

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[onestowatch]

Your Grandparents Manifest a Cinematic, Soulful Debut Album With ‘Thru My Window’  [Q&A]

Photo: Jordan Perez

Inspired by everything from ‘90s boom bap artists like Digable Planets and the Pharcyde to modern funk legends like Outkast and D'Angelo, Your Grandparents have quickly proven themselves to be their generations' torchbearers for the psychedelic soul movement. 

Using a variety of recording techniques to get the desired effect for their genre-blending debut album Thru My Window, the group credits their uniquely cohesive sound to their years-long friendship, which began in their early teens. With their lush grooves, breezy, clear vocals, a sonic aesthetic built on unwavering authenticity, and of course, a deep love for their roots and deep musical traditions passed down from their grandparents, Your Grandparents embodies what it means to be an artist to watch.

Ones To Watch had a chance to talk with the trio, comprised of DaCosta (vocals), Jean Carter (vocals), and Cole, aka ghettoblasterman (producer), to discuss their inspirations and the long days and nights that went into creating their debut album.

When you last spoke to Ones To Watch, it was for the release of your single "So Damn Fly," and now, a year later, here we are talking about the release of your debut album, Thru My Window. How are you all feeling, and what have you learned about yourselves in this last year through the album-making process?

DaCosta: From a personal outlook, I've learned that making music is heavily dependent on my mood, or just how I'm feeling and what's going on in my personal life. When things are a little too stagnant, it's a little harder to write. On the other hand, when things are flowing, and life is being lived, it's easy fuel. It's good fuel. It doesn't burn too quickly.

GBM: I've learned that no idea is too wild. It's usually less wild than I think it is.

Jean: Yeah, it's better to start at the extreme and take away. I realized I feel like a lot of artists feel like they have to put themselves through turmoil or allow certain situations to write meaningful things. Like it's not necessarily good music, but it's something that means a lot to them. I think I realized that that's not the case and inspiration comes in many different forms. It could be a person or something completely random and inanimate that makes you feel something.

What were some of those inspirations?

Jean: Definitely films.

GBM: A lot of films!

Jean: Yeah, we're all pretty big film people. We do all our own videos pretty much, and it just comes from this love of film that we've had that got nurtured in high school. We were blessed enough to have a really dope film program that Sony funded and stuff, and so we got like an impromptu film education before we graduated. So by the time we graduated, we knew how to get our own projects done without reaching out to someone else and then taxing us because they want to hire their friends and all that stuff. So because of that, we had complete creative control. I've also been watching a lot of Korean movies lately. Not during the album—wait, actually, during the album, there were a lot of old kung fu movies and blaxploitation movies from, like, the ‘70s. Also, my friend got me this Curtis Mayfield record, and "So Damn Fly" is definitely heavily influenced by that whole record.

GBM: I feel like the ‘70s in general, the ‘60s and ‘70s, definitely had a big inspiration on the aesthetic and the kind of sound we were going after. Especially with "So Damn Fly" and "Tomorrow" and those kinds of songs.

Do you feel like this album has a linear story the same way a film does, or do you feel like it's more of an anthology of the band's personal experiences?

GBM: It's kind of a mix of both.

Jean: Yeah, it started off as an anthology, and then we pieced together the story, which was largely done by Cole by sitting there and being like, “Hmmm.”

DaCosta: Yeah, it was a lot of Cole dissecting the words and putting them on the tracks.

Jean: When we're writing the words and trying to be free-flowing and expressive and stuff, we're not fully conscious of a bigger picture situation. Instead, Cole is sitting there producing everything and putting in the music and being just more of a listener than anyone else could. So he has the context, and he could find a story that we didn't know we were doing together with our three minds and in our three different lives.

GBM: It's like a puzzle almost, because I'll be sitting there at like 2 a.m. in my bed, listening to the songs, and I'm like, "Ok, Kyle said, that in the hook, so this song has to go before that," and so on and so forth. It's like a storyboard kinda.

Right, to keep the record's "plot" cohesive and self-referential.

GBM: Another big consideration was playlists. I love making playlists, and I know Kyle loves making playlists, too, so it needed to flow. It just has to flow. We didn't want songs that juxtapose each other or have opposite vibes be back to back.

DaCosta: Yeah, I think we even switched around the playlist a couple of times before we had it set in stone.

GBM: There were like fourteen songs originally, and then we got talked down to ten.

Jean: Fourteen tracks woulda went crazy!

I'm sure fans would love a deluxe version of the album at some point! So what were some of the rough draft ideas before you set these ten tracks in stone?

Jean: There were more modern-sounding tracks. The more time we spent on a project, and this being our debut, we wanted to be true to the name. We wanted to be true to the artistry that had gotten us to this point.

DaCosta: There were a couple of heavier hip-hop tracks there too.

Jean: We had been doing that, and a lot of people haven't even heard those because they're like heavy hip-hop stuff from when we were in high school and like early college.

Were there any tracks on the record that challenged you?

Jean: "Intoxicated" challenged me. I had a whole different verse. The conception of that song—I was just venting about whatever I was going through at the time, and one of my homies was like, "It's not sexy enough!" So I was just like, "What? No! I've done sexy stuff on all the other songs. Just let me vent!" So I tried another verse, and we ended up going with that one instead.

DaCosta: I mean, it worked out great though...

Jean: I mean, yeah, it sits nicely on the song, and now I have a verse for something else one day when it's time for it.

GBM: Yeah, that song went from being all of ours and everyone on our team's favorite song to our least favorite song. I will say that recording the instruments for the album was fun, but there were definitely some long hours. We had a drummer and bassist come through, and they played for like twelve hours straight doing all the songs. So the songs that have live drums on them were all done in that one day, and they even did songs we recorded that didn't make it on the final record. I think we started at 1 p.m. and we ended at 1 a.m. It was crazy.

What song are you most excited for people to hear when the album drops?

Jean: I think people are gonna like "Comfortable" a lot. Honestly, I haven't listened to the record in a while because it's existed in our world for a minute. We had just posted the visuals for that song today, and I was feelin it.

DaCosta: I think people are gonna really like "Digest." For me, it gives me that "it" factor.

GBM: I think "Red Room." It's my personal favorite and one of the more fun ones to me. It's just a good time!

You mentioned earlier that you try to maintain creative control when making your music videos and coming up with concepts for visualizers. What is your creative process like?

DaCosta: We definitely sit down, and we go through everything from storyboard to shotlist and just take and grab inspiration from all over the place. For "So Damn Fly," there was that That 70's Show shot where they're all sitting around the table, and it's spinning. So there are all types of really cool influences, and we just try to use those and make everything unique to us.

GBM: I think we kind of go through a three-step verification. The idea has to go through all three of us before it becomes something else or moves on to actually being tested out or put into picture. So that kind of attributes to the very solid identity we aim for.

It sounds like that impromptu film education you mentioned earlier has really set you up for success in creating your videos.

Jean: Yeah. My high school film teacher, Miss Butler, I took that class for two years, and then when I couldn't take it anymore, I became a TA. So then I took the after-school class, and I just spent hella hours pretty much ruining the way I enjoyed cinema and teaching myself like—she would have us look and watch these classic movies and be like, this is what they did wrong.

Can you give me an example of a classic film you would watch and critique?

Jean: The first one that comes to mind is Rear Window. I watched it a few times, just because I had taken the class a couple of times. She talked about how the set that they made and the world that they created, they had full control over. Just seeing older films and how simple things were a lot more complicated then. Like you can't just delete a take and wipe your card. Everything had to be so planned out and so intentional. You gotta do shit on purpose. It's just a lot of thinking and planning, and sometimes, I feel like it's more challenging to have more people involved in a film production sometimes because of the growing degrees of communication. With the small groups that we usually keep, everyone's on the same page as us. All of us took this same class, so we all have a similar workflow.

DaCosta: Yeah, our organization when it comes to films, we're all pretty much on the same page. You know, with what was going to happen, who's doing what, who's in charge of what, etc.

Jean: And pre-production is the biggest thing and finding the right team because we can't shoot it and be in it. Although Cole can somehow!

GBM: I'm in one scene, and I'm like, "I'm just gonna kill this scene right now, and then I'm gonna jump back." That's why I'm only in the last scene.

Because he's doing everything else!

Jean: Yeah! Then as soon as the scene cuts, it's like, I go back to directing people, and Kyle goes back to making sure we got the next shot set up.

GBM: There were only seven people on set.

DaCosta: And four out of seven were crew members

GBM: Yeah, the DP was the only person that wasn't actually a casted character. Everybody else is like multitasking.

You'll be making your first-ever festival appearance at Day N Vegas in November. How are y'all feeling about it? 

GBM: It feels incredible!

DaCosta: I'm so so excited!

Jean: If I get excited, I get nervous. So I just aim to be focused, or I don't think about it at all.

After the release of Thru My Window, what are some long-term or short-term goals y'all are manifesting?

Jean: I think for the next album, I want it to get Best Rap Album. We went R&B on this one, but nobody knows the way that we—like yes, we rap on it, but nobody knows our actual rap potential. So I feel like that's something that needs to be lived out on the next project. It's been a minute since we were rapping, bro. There are cool people out here doing the rap thing right now, but not many people have impressed me.

GBM: I kind of want this album to open up the door to doing a lot of travel. When we got back from Paris in 2019, what we experienced during that summer gave us fuel to start this project. So I feel like if we just keep that kind of like tradition going, we just travel somewhere and just make stuff, I think it'll never get steered wrong.

DaCosta: I think I want the album to just open up doors in general. I know it's kind of a broad thing, but like, we're so diverse, and between the three of us, we can do literally anything I think in the world if we put our minds to it, and we kind of plan on doing everything that we want to do. So, I kind of want this album to open the door just so that we can you can start striding towards whatever, whether it's directing movies and videos and fucking scoring—

Jean: Or directing other people's videos!

DaCosta: Yeah, all types of shit.

Thru My Window is available everywhere you can stream it. 

[dannissa13]

NaNo, part two

Guess what? Every time I’m trying to be an adult and do something responsible it comes back to bite me in the ass. This time it’s an entirely new flavor of “fuck this shit” - I’ve done a good thing and got vaccinated for diphtheria and I now have a lymph node the size of a ripe cherry on my clavicle that hurts like a bitch. My arm hurt really badly too. And said lymph node is going to need medical attention because it’s not going away on its own and I’m fucking terrified that it would need a surgery because I don’t want that to happen to me. I’m really scared and upset and also confused. What did I do that was so vile to fucking deserve this? By the way, I wasn’t sitting on my ass and getting myself even more scared for my health condition this time - I went to the doctor immediately, as soon as I found this problem, and said the doctor was no help at all. Just take ibuprofen and rest, it’ll go away on its own. And if it won’t, you’ll have to do a lot of blood work done and an ultrasound and other shit and probably surgery. Fucking great, so it’s no help at all. Basically, just two outcomes - in both no one knows for sure what to do and in one case it’ll heal itself magically and in the other, I’m fucked ower and will lose money, time and my mind because I’m so scared of this. Just fucking great. Why do I even bother with things, I should’ve stayed down in my depression hole and never moved an inch, because there I at least knew what was going on and who or what was responsible for the shittiness of my state. Now it’s a fucking mystery. Goddamnit!

Another thing is - I’ve posted the first fic I’ve finished this time around and it got feedback. Like for days, jeez, I wasn’t expecting that. It was originally conceived as a gift and turned out as a gift but a bit too late for a person’s birthday, and I was expecting like one view and one kudo from them and it turned out to be my greatest smashing success this far in my ao3 time. Other thing is - the person this was written for didn’t really like it that much and they let me know that hard, they red me to filth. The critique wasn’t that bad actually, but I’ve taken it waaay to personally and internationalized the fuck outta it and now am kinda resenting the shit out of that person I tried hard to please in the first place. But that’s my flaw. Not that I don’t think that it wasn’t a nice thing to say to a friend who worked their fucking ass to write for you and tailor the gift specially for you and then you go out of your way and do something you were not asked to do - give your writing critique for example - because that was not fucking nice and made me feel really shitty, I’m saying that I’m a dumbass for lingering on this for too long and caring about this bullshit too much. Other people seem to love that piece of trash, I’ve got the most likes in a day that I’ve ever gotten on any of my works and it’s a record for me because I’ve hit a hundred kudos on a fic, so yay for me, I guess. To spoil my own party, I have to say this - I wasn’t in love with both fandom and a concept and finished it for that person especially but also wasn’t emotionally attached to the work as much and that’s why the feedback isn’t hitting me as hard as it could’ve been if I have gotten this much attention on one of my more involved fics.

Also, through all of this, I’m writing the second fic, also as a gift for my new friend from work. Let’s see how that’ll turn out because apparently, I refuse to learn my lessons. While finishing this one I found bits I wrote while being in a very bad dark place and was like “jeez bitch who hurt ya” to later realize that it was myself. Just a great thing to think about, right? Oh, self-reflection and therapy, you truly do wonders for me feeling good about myself (not). Fuuuck. But I’m writing it, bit by bit, little by little, every single fucking day and I’m getting closer and closer to the end goal of posting it. Which is great. Can’t wait to not get any feedback on it because apparently, I’m a hack who cannot write for shit. Yay!

I’ve also gotten into “fitness” lately, but that I mean wearing my Apple Watch excessively and trying way too much to fill all three arbitrary goal movement rings on that thing because my brain is not okay and that shit works on OCD ridden morons like me. I’ve blown it by the way, because today I was too sick to do that crap so buh-bye my streak of 13 days, I wasn’t even able to make it to two weeks mark. Fuck me.

Also also, I decided to participate in a work event to make a group project that will be later judged by my coworkers as other one’s will, and I roped into it three other people and couldn’t do much of my part properly because of the very first thing I’ve mentioned - getting a severe freaking reaction to a vaccine. And that makes me feel like I’ve failed everybody and we’re not gonna win because of me. I’m an asshole and I didn’t keep my promise. That’s a shitty feeling.

Also, Tumblr, are ya high? Why is it that when I try to make the next paragraph in a simple text post here, you teleport me into another dimension, you dumbass app! This is bullshit!

Also also also also, if you’re thinking that the punctuation on this post is really off and it seems weirdly rumbling to ya don’t fear because it is all sorts of fucked up for sure - I’m writing it at 4 am on a Sunday because I don’t love myself. Fuck me, fuck my bullshit life and fuck this website/app.

I’m out. Deuces.

[pettyprocrastination]

I Don't Think We're On Earth-65 Anymore Cop!Frank Castle x Spider!Reader

@jarvis-ismy-copilot @wolfmothar @murdockmmatt @marvelobsessedteen

Summary: Jitterbug gets help from the Devil of hell's kitchen and learns a big detail about the masked vigilante.

Chapter five

“You mean to tell me you’re from another dimension?” Daredevil summed up. Once he swore to help her find her way home the pair took to the rooftops in travel, jumping and swinging from building to building as they spoke.

“Sounds crazy I know, but it’s the truth.”

“I believe you.”

Jitterbug halted on the edge of the building and looked at him. “Wait, really? Just like that? You just trust me like that?” Surely he should've been at least a little surprised.

The devil merely smiled. “I doubt you’d lie about it, and I mean after seeing a hole open up in the sky and spit you out like a soggy fry I don't have much room to argue.”

“Hm. Touche.”

“Not to mention I can hear your heartbeat.” He added before resuming their rooftop clamour once more.

“You can WHAT?”

Matt knew he should probably be more cautious of the woman. He knew nothing about her or where her allegiance lies. But what he knew was that she was telling the truth, that she was lost and needed to get home. Usually he would think she's crazy. Maybe it was the catholic in him insisting she help her, maybe it was his hero complex or his bleeding heart, or maybe it was seeing her fall out of the sky like a asteroid that made him think she was truly in a struggle.

Boy, he thought he had seen it all. The dead come back to life, a bullet-proof man, a woman with super strength and...whatever the hell was up with Danny. But this, oh this took the cake.

“Mind telling me where we’re going Devil-dude?” She swung right next to him by what looks to be a rope shooting out of her wrist. It was certainly a new power in his book.

“My apartment.” He answered. “We gotta figure out how exactly you got here, by what, and how to get you back. We need a game plan.”

“Sounds good to me. Your New York is a little different than mine so I'm just gonna follow your lead on this.”

Matt hadn’t expected Foggy and Karen to be at his apartment that night. He really didn’t. They had won a case that day and the trio wanted to celebrate, but Matt had left early to go on patrol.

“When the hell does he get back from this shit?” Foggy groaned. “It’s 2 am!”

Karen shushed him. “Dont! This is supposed to be a surprise Foggy and I'm pretty sure the family across the street can hear you!” She giggled a little bit when she spoke so he knew the pair were already buzzed. He could smell pizza, beer and cupcakes, no doubt store bought but the thought still warmed his heart. The group had come along way since they reopened their law-firm. Granted Foggy and Karen don't support his late night activities with open arms, but they love Matt. So they do their damndest to be there for him whenever they could. He couldn’t wish for a better family.

“Boy.” Jitterbug spoke. “You're friends are fucking loud.”

“I don’t know how to get you in there without them seeing you.” She snorted.

“Oh don’t worry about me, I can get in there like a sweet summer breeze. What room you want me in?”

He made a face.

“Yeah, bad wording on my part. Sorry.”

“My bedroom is behind a large door on the left, If I draw them to the windows the maybe-”

“Oh my god you're just like Castle.” She groaned and knocked on the door for him. “Too much thinking!”

“Wait no-”

“There he is!” The moment Foggy opened the door, Jitterbug disappeared in a gust of wind. His friend paused and pointed to Matt.

“Wait a minute, why did you knock at your own apartment?”

“I could hear you guys inside.”

Karen laughed from the couch. “I told you!”

Foggy waved her off. “Yeah, yeah I’ll work on my volume control another day. But now-” He placed a cold beer in his friend’s hand with an infectious smile. “-We celebrate!”

He walked in and glanced around the apartment. His kitchen was void and the hallway empty so where did Jitterbug disappear to? “You guys didn’t have to do this you know. It’s late.”

“Yet here we are.” Karen pointed out. “So you better park it Murdock, because you aren’t getting rid of us anytime soon.”

That may prove to be a problem.

“Let me just get dressed, this isn’t exactly comfortable.” Matt walked into his room, quickly shutting the door behind him.

Jitterbug stood in the center of his room, seemingly appearing out of nowhere. “Your friends are nice. Do they know about you-”

“They do.” He quickly shed his clothes, she merely raised a brow and watched him hurriedly dress himself. “It’s caused a lot of problems and it’s taken a long time for me to gain their trust again. But that trust will be broken again if they-”

“Find some random vigilante chick in your room?” She finished and waved him off. “I got you devil-dude. I’ll wait in here until their gone-” She pantomimed zipping her lips with a smile. “-quiet as a mouse.”

Matt’s shoulder dropped and let out a breath of relief. “Thank you. I know this is an urgent situation for you but-”

“You got a life to protect.” She plopped herself down on his bed, taking note of the silk sheets. “I get that.” She’d been through the struggle herself. Because of the life Jitterbug chose to live, she was pretty lonely. Many partners and friends had walked out of the heroine’s life because she would run off in the middle of a sentence or come home late at night barely able to stand. It was a harsh life, but one that she felt she had to live for the safety of others.

She noticed his eyes for the first time and froze. They were nice. Brown and soft, but unfocused. He was facing her as she spoke but his eyes never really focused on her as a person but more on the direction she was in.

“Wait a minute, are you blind?”

He cracked a smile. “Just a tad.”

One of his friend’s knocked on the door in rapid succession.

“Come on Murdock!” Foggy shouted and Jitterbug’s blood ran cold. “I wanna see if you can beat my mini cupcake record!” Matt smiled and shook his head.

“I’ll doubt I can, but I’ll try!” He finished tying the string in his pants and reached for the doorknob, only to freeze when he heard Jitterbug's voice hesitantly ask.

“Is your name..Matt Murdock?”

He turned to her, his hands coming to rest as his side and twitching. “I am, why?”

She opened her mouth to speak, before shutting it and shaking her head. “It’s nothing.” She motioned to the door and made a shooing motion with her hands, ready for his friends to leave and find a way home. “Let’s just hope your better than the one from my universe.”

Matt wanted to stay and ask what he was like and what he had done to her, but there was no time. He needed to spend time with his friends before ushering them out under the excuse that he needed to get some rest but truly so he can learn more about this mystery hero and how to get her back to her universe. He locked the door before him and she slid down to the floor, praying that the unlikely friend she just made wouldn’t simply make the situation worse.

I have officially finished writing and editing this fic!!yay!! Now I can focus on uploading the chapters and getting to work on other pieces!! So don't hesitate to send some requests my way ESPECIALLY for some more jitterbug content, you know I love that gal!! Also want you guys to know I am going to start writing for Griff from baby driver as well. Please don't hesitate to send me a message about a request, critiques or just wanted to say hi! I completely forgot the tag list until this chapter I'm so sorry sdnrksks but please let me know if you want to be tagged in the future chapters, hope you lovelies have a great day <3

[kpoptimeout]

My Top 10 K-Dramas of 2018 - What’s Yours?

2018 is ending soon and K-Dramaland has once again brought us so many goodies this year. As per our blog’s tradition [For 2017 faves click here], below are my Top 10 favs of the year (my faves in alphabetical order so it might not be yours so please don’t judge)

My only specific criteria this year is that the show must have had started in 2018 to be considered a 2018 series (Hence, Hwayugi and I’m Not A Robot were in last year’s list and honourable mentions)

Lawless Lawyer (tvN)

Every year we have a few stellar Korean legal dramas and Lawless Lawyer is one of them. Starring veterans Lee Joongi and Son Yeji, the drama details a gangster turned lawyer who used unorthodox techniques to win cases and a lawyer-childhood friend-love interest who got into trouble for attacking a judge. After his return from the military, Lee Joongi has acted in many internationally well-received dramas but “Lawless Lawyer” is the first since his return to gain massive commercial success within South Korea and becoming one of the highest viewed dramas on Korean cable channel history. Son Yeji was also able to show her acting chops and shed her pretty girl image through this drama. It is understandable why this drama did well - it was action-packed, had a well-plotted storyline and also the right laughs at the right moments. If you love an amazing legal drama, go watch Lawless Lawyer already!

Memories Of The Alhambra (tvN/Netflix)

You know it’s nearing the year’s end when tvN drops another high budget and experimental drama with a star-studded cast to steal you and the critics’ hearts. This year it is Memories Of The Alhambra, which is an ambitious project jointly produced by tvN and Netflix. Following the success of jointly produced Mr. Sunshine which also made the list, the two studios teamed up for an even crazier project - instead of the guaranteed tear-jerking historical drama they went for a sci-fi/fantasy thriller exploring virtual and augmented reality and business in the digital age. You know they are taking this project seriously when they got the writer for “W” (the Lee Jongsuk and Han Hyojoo hit about the collapse of a comic book world into reality) Song Jaejung to write this screenplay. The show with top cast featuring Hallyu stars and veterans Hyun Bin, Park Shin Hye, and EXO’s Chanyeol with exhilarating graphics and filming in Grenada has been topping online and domestic Korean viewership since its broadcast on December 1st. If you enjoy creative sci-fi adventures with Asian leads, this is the drama for you!

Mr. Sunshine (tvN/Netflix)

One of the first tvN and Netflix collaborations, Mr. Sunshine was an unsurprising hit starring world-famous Korean actor Lee Byung Hoon and South Korea’s favourite young actress Kim Taeri. Other main cast include skilled and popular actors like Yoo Yeonseok, Byung Yohan and Kim Minjung. Throw in the historical Joseon setting and the imminent colonisation by foreign powers, you have a recipe for an awards-sweeper and crowd-pleaser! Besides a plot that easily draws in audiences, the set designs, colour grading, music, and costumes are all phenomenal and is a feast for the senses. My only knit-picking critique is it seems unrealistic that a Korean man can rise to as high a rank as Lee Byung Hoon’s Eugene Choi character in the racist 1800s United States no matter how brilliant Eugene Choi was. But besides that, if you love a historical epic with romance and war, this is the drama you would enjoy!

Ms. Hammurabi (JTBC)

This drama sees Go Ara and Song Dong Il reuniting in their father-daughter/mentor-mentee like dynamic following hit dramas Reply 1994 and Hwarang, with Go Ara being an idealistic former music student who dropped out and self-studied to become a judge, and Song Dong Il being the old geezer and life mentor who only managed to become a judge later in life. They are joined by INFINITE’s L being a by the books judge who likes Go Ara’s wholesome character. The drama is exceptionally touching, not only for its realistic depiction of life as judges in civilian law countries but also as a reflection of people chasing their dreams in different stages of their life. The drama also expertly deals with real-world issues like gender discrimination in the workplace, prejudice to marginalised groups and the issues that come with an inflexible hierarchical structure in South Korea. While there is romance between the leads, this is shown subtly and naturally, without it becoming a distraction to the engaging storyline. If you enjoy a thoughtful drama about society with great acting, this is a drama you would enjoy.

My ID is Gangnam Beauty (JTBC)

Maybe I am slightly biased because I loved the webtoon but I think My ID is Gangnam Beauty is one of the best Korean rom-coms of the year. First I thought the casting was spot-on - ASTRO’s Cha Eunwoo perfectly encapsulated the cold and awkward Do Kyungseok and Im Soohyang was able to display the insecurities of Kang Mirae even after plastic surgery well. The drama does a good job of touching on Korean society’s toxic beauty visual standards - it still makes the female lead insecure even after she gets plastic surgery and she gets ridiculed before and after plastic surgery. Meanwhile second female lead Hyun Soo Ah, played by Jo Woori, also struggles as a natural beauty due to fears of people no longer liking her should she ever fall below their expectations in any way. This is a thoughtful drama that does not just demonise characters for the sake of drama but gives us lots of food for thought about why people act the way they do regarding appearances. If you like a drama that is fun and cute but also has a good message, you should check out this drama!

My Mister (tvN)

There are dramas where you skip some scenes because you want to get to the main point. There are some dramas where you want every second of it. My Mister was one of those dramas you watch every second of. It was that good. While many Kdramas still having idealistic female leads who slowly get jaded and turn badass only near the end/are always protected by men and never turn badass, My Mister finally does the move of making the female poor but super resourceful, brilliant and cynical, and already super jaded to begin with. Played by top singer and actress IU, the female lead Lee Jian reverses the usual female lead tropes by slowly learning to see some good in the world and learn to dream following a life of extreme poverty and hardship. The other highlight of the drama is the male lead played by talented actor Lee Sunkyun, whose relationship with his brothers and mother, as well as his crumbling marriage with his wife provide a lot of food for thought on the meaning of family and life. By acting as a mentor of IU’s character while also being saved by IU from lots of drama unknowingly, we see two broken souls learn from each other to be better people. The drama also showcased how romance is not the only meaningful love that exists between communities. If you love an insightful slice-of-life drama with realistic intrigues, betrayals, and character development, you would love My Mister.

Radio Romance (KBS2)

Honestly at this point HIGHLIGHT’s Dojoon is just nation’s drama boyfriend and he continues to pick the good scripts as we can see in Radio Romance. The drama is simple - the assistant writer played by Kim Sohyun’s radio show might get cancelled and she manages to somehow get the top radio star played by Dojoon to host her show. Shenanigans happen and romance blossoms. It is stereotypical but done well, with the right amount of twists and just knowing when it should bounce back from the laughs and side stories. If dramas are all dishes, Radio Romance is like that cheesecake that tastes sweet and light, not so filling that it will you sick. It is the dessert you would always go for to feel good. If you like to watch something that makes you feel warm inside, this is the drama for you!

Something in the Rain (JTBC)

I am usually not super into “the younger dongsaeng has a romance with noona who he knows growing up all of a sudden” stories but there was something special about Something in the Rain. When I first began watching this drama, it did not feel like watching a regular Kdrama at all and more like an indie film from the West. There is a feeling of emptiness at the beginning, possibly to signify the resident noona and veteran actress Son Yejin’s unsuccessful love life. There was a lot of dialogue and cuts and it felt like watching a documentary about the lives of the characters. But it was this formatting of Something in the Rain that makes it feel so genuine. The pace of the leads building up their romance was steady and natural. Hence, it made issues they faced feel all the more real too. If you enjoy a realistic slice-of-life portrayal of romance, you would love this drama!

The Guest (OCN)

When I saw the trailer I already knew this was some scary shit. Following its many successful thrillers last year, OCN decided to dive in the more horror side of a thriller in The Guest. To fit this aesthetic, the drama was broadcasted only at 11pm instead of primetime but still had massive success and rightly so. The acting by the three leads Kim Dong Wook (man who can see ghosts and the future), Kim Jaewook (the cold, exorcist priest), and Jung Eunchae (a detective who does not believe in the supernatural) is phenomenal, making their team up to catch criminal possessed by ghosts all the more exhilarating. The actors who play the possessed are also amazing, making for most of the scares in this drama. If you enjoy a mystery and the horror genre, this is the Kdrama for you!

What’s Wrong with Secretary Kim? (tvN)

Being the most searched Kdrama on Google in South Korea this year, it would not make sense for What’s Wrong with Secretary Kim? not to make this list. The drama revolves around the successful but extremely narcissistic company vice chairman played by Park Seojoon and his capable no-nonsense secretary played by Park Minyoung, with the latter quitting after paying off family debts and not being in the mood to work for her annoying boss anymore. The whole process where Park Seojoon tries to retain his secretary of course blossoms into romance etc. etc. One of the reasons this drama did so well was that not only did it have a strong and capable female lead but Park Seojoon defied expectations in his role. As another Kdrama based on a webtoon, original webtoon readers felt like he was not similar to the male lead and were not sure how he would handle the role. But Park Seojoon did a fantastic job, to the point I wanted to bang my head on the table or slap his character whenever he did narcissistic shit. If you want a high-quality rom-com with some unorthodox twists, this is the drama to watch!

Honourable Mentions:

100 Days My Prince (tvN): The fourth highest-rated Korean drama in cable television history starring EXO’s D.O and Nam Jihyun, the drama details the marriage between a noblewoman on the run and a crown prince who lost his memory during a failed assassination attempt.

Are You Human? (KBS2): With the actual development of AI in recent years, more Kdramas have embraced the topic of robot-human romances. Seo Kang Joon and Gong Seungyeon star in this story involving a bodyguard and the AI of a chaebol masquerading as the real chaebol who is in a coma.

Still 17 (SBS): A drama involving a 30-year-old man who doesn’t want to grow up due to trauma (Yang Sejong) and a woman who wakes up after a 13-year coma so acts like a 17-year-old even though she is 30 (Shin Hyesun).

Welcome to Waikiki (JTBC): A comedy-drama starring rising actors Kim Junghyun, Lee Yikyung, and Son Seungwon who run a failing guesthouse called Waikiki. Oh, and there’s a single mother and a baby in this crazy mix!

What’s your Top 10 K-Dramas of the Year? Leave your thoughts in the comments section below and may the drama sharing begin (and the road to more excuse for holiday procrastination!)

Also, if you want to check out underrated K-Pop songs of 2018, here are the lists for idol songs, artist songs, and OSTs!

[ohwiseswami]

VIXX: An Outsiders Perspective

Now, I’ve decided on doing a VIXX critique using this formula because I’m very new to their work. As requested by some followers, I’ve crammed in as much information as I could about their music recently and want to share my thoughts on them and where they could improve. 

Let’s start.

The Good

Niche Music: VIXX is probably the most eclectic group I’ve done so far in that many of their singles are, essentially, pop-rock tracks. They are not a ‘hippity-hoppity, let’s throw on a blackcent and a bandana’ type of group, which, I argue, gives them space at the table in the music industry. Of all the groups I can think of, it’s them that is doing this capitalism thing right. People want differentiation in products and with VIXX being Nickelback-meets-NSYNC in an industry of Skrillex-meets-Chris Brown-meets-Soulja Boy’s, it’s actually kind of refreshing

Surprisingly Decent Vocal Line: VIXX stans can argue all day whether Jaehwan (Ken) or Taekwoon (Leo) is the superior vocal, but it’s obvious it’s Hakyeon (N). Let me tell you why: N has a stronger vocal technique than either Leo or Ken from what I’ve seen. Now, I know I could use to watch more VIXX performances but, as I said, from what I’ve seen N protects his voice more than the other two. Funnily enough, Ken is actually my favorite of them all. His tone is just agreeable. Even so, I find it difficult to find too many issues with Leo’s voice because he has the best stage presence of them all--bringing emotion into his performances that feels genuine--even if it’s not much

Creative Involvement: Hate him or love him, Wonsik (Ravi) is involved in just about every VIXX release that immediately comes to mind. And while this isn’t a requirement for me to find an idol good at what they do (will get into the distinction between artist and idol another time), I find it admirable. This is especially so since VIXX has some songs with very powerful lyrical content and meaning

Recent Improvement in Music Production: While my section on VIXX’s music will come later, I want to note now that VIXX’s latest release sounds very crisp and clean, which is a sign of improvement. Anytime a group grows, I always find it in me to give them a plus on the improvement. But seriously, their releases used to sound like they were recorded on a flip phone from a radio station that played it from a 1942 record player. It was a whole low-sonic quality mess. Now it finally sounds like what 2k HD looks like

The ‘Needs to Improve’

Dance Line: 

Current - While I find Hakyeon lighter than air and graceful in his movement, he does not captivate me. His dancing lacks energy at times and can even be seen as lethargic. He can’t even hold charismatic facial expressions because of it. While he delivers at times (his TOXIC routine is gold), he usually looks flat out exhausted. Perhaps this has something to do with being the main dancer in a group with only one back up for him?

Improvement - That said, I think Hakyeon can be saved. It’s clear that he has talent but not the proper outlet to show it. What I argue needs to happen for the dance line, particularly Hakyeon is a change in VIXX’s dancing style. I think that with more gender-fluid choreography, Hakyeon’s style could shine through. He looks best when performing choreography that isn’t attached to the mainstream kpop style for boy groups. Injecting feminine energy into VIXX’s choreography would make for a more lively performance than their typical point dances (if you’re curious as to what I mean, I urge you to check out Taemin’s MOVE or watch a strip show)

Music:

Current - VIXX’s music, for lack of a better term, is dated. The music they debuted with was about 5 years behind the industry (which was already five years behind the American industry) and they’re just now playing catch-up with their latest release. When I listen to some of those songs, I get the distinct feeling that VIXX watched SHINee Lucifer once and decided to model their entire discography off of it. Even to their latest release, it sounds like something EXO would’ve released in 2016. Now, you can argue that older-sounding music is a good thing, but in VIXX’s case, it’s not. Their music is not timeless, it’s just usually dated on arrival 

Improvement - Even with their music being dated, it’s still different from the norm and has a sound that no other kpop group since VIXX’s debut has even wanted to touch. They can easily take this sound and update it, giving them a 2013 Paramore feel (which, 2013 Paramore still sounds like fresh alternative rock music)

Current - A lot of their music sounds the same. There’s some standouts like Love Me Do and Only U, but most of it sounds like different variations of songs like Error and Chained Up

Improvement - See: Paramore. Seriously. I’m not talking about their most recent album but in albums before that they still had music that felt like Paramore without being the same thing rehashed. I think VIXX could ultimately go the soft EDM-pop rock fusion route and eliminate the High School Musical 4 sound that invades many of their songs

Visuals:

Current - VIXX’s music videos aren’t horrible, not even by a stretch. They’re just not interesting. This is pretty standard in kpop, but that doesn’t mean they should shoot for the sky when they can have the moon. Their concepts are usually so interesting and so different from the norm that they could really get creative with their music videos

Improvement - VIXX finally got their hands on cameras that weren’t attached to iPhones, so can they now get a VFX and SFX team to bring their concepts to life without looking like a cheesy low budget mess? I know they come from a smaller company and may not have the money to really go all out but I think it’s worth a shot to find a good production team to execute their concepts better. At the very least, they could use better direction and maybe even give their videos a story line. Am I the only one who’d find a plot for Chained Up dope, especially since the song itself tells a story?

The Irredeemable

Get rid of Ravi. There, I said it, it’s done. 

I know VIXX stans gonna hate my ass lmao. But, I’m not saying he’s a bad artist/not talented/etc. I just don’t know that he’s right for VIXX’s progression as a musical performance entity. Here is my main reason:

VIXX should be a vocal k-pop/rock group. They don’t need a rapper, never did. In fact, rap portions usually do not advance VIXX’s songs. Instead, it sounds like forcing a YG-reject to fit in with a SHINee/CNBlue hybrid experiment. Ravi’s an okay singer, but he’s not good enough to eat at the table with Ken and Leo, who are more like ex-EXO/DBSK members to me

Another thing that limits VIXX is the fact that they are very boybandish at times. Now you may say, ‘Sis, they are a boyband,’ but this crtique isn’t about what VIXX is, it’s about what they could be. VIXX has the potential to be the emo cousin of EXO, with moody concepts and experimental choreography. I know some of them play instruments as well, which could only add to their new identity once we’ve cut them down. The South American and Southeast Asian markets would eat that up, especially since VIXX is already so good at it

Also, maybe not be trash? I kind of wanted to avoid this, but it’s hard to do considering the fact that all I knew about VIXX before working on this was the fact that N was bullied into submission by the members and some of them have said some vile things that only compete with the likes of Suju for their level of trashness. The main reason why I wanted to mention this is because of what I see for VIXX’s path in the future (I also want to note that I didn’t let this color my musical critique of VIXX)

I see VIXX as a staple in Latin America and Southeast Asia, but it’s hard to do when you’re constantly shit-talking the looks of the people who inhabit these areas. Dark skin and Tanned skin are beautiful and nothing to be ashamed of. Pale skin isn’t superior and calling someone a “half-breed” as an insult isn’t funny? All it does is alienates potential fans from the markets that would be open to your style the most. Because, if I’m being honest, I don’t know many people from where I’m from (probably the whitest place in America) that would be too into VIXX’s music and concepts. Their wave is more appropriate for places like Brazil and The Phillipines. If they want to grow their audience, they need to grow as people 

Final Thoughts

Hongbin and Hyuk both remind me of Sehun. Take that as you want.

VIXX is not meant for the Bangtan trajectory. They have their own special place in kpop that is so unique from other groups that they shouldn’t worry themselves with North American success. I think they’re talented men with something to prove, and with a little adjustment, they can become a niche phenomenon 

[ideahat-universe]

Bad, Good, Grey entertainment

Okay so there’s been a lot of pedo talk about various forms of entertainment and I want to set the record straight on what we are dealing with here. 

Toddler’s and Tiaras/Dance Moms/Little Miss Sunshine/ and Honey Boo Boo probably:

No one with empathy for children or just humanity in general liked those shows. Those shows were popular and went on for several seasons because the production costs were low and the reality television audience is very passive, very addicted to drama, and love watching freak shows. 

You can’t find a audience more entertained by human suffering than the people that love watching reality shows. 

The success of those shows is not an indictment of America, especially Little Miss Sunshine which is a movie that no one has seen. If you defend Cuties by saying that Little Miss Sunshine had something like that in the third act I have to respond with “No one who isn’t a hipster douchebag or a film reviewer has seen the ending to that film”

Normal people don’t watch shit like that. Do you even remember the trailers? I do! I saw a review for it either and it looked like the cure for insomnia. 

The average person thinks Honey Boo Boo was the worst, they think dance moms is for sociopaths who like seeing little girls cry, and they think Toddler’s and Tiara’s are for pedophiles. 

Big Mouth: 

Big Mouth is a coming of age show for adults and it seems mostly like a thinly veiled excuse to watch westernized lolita and shota soft core porn, it might be that but the big problem with calling Big Mouth fans pedos is that big Mouth is basically like every other raunchy adult comedy, including the sacred cow South Park. 

There’s not a lot of stuff that Big Mouth has done that South Park hasn’t also done and in standard American fashion the art style is more repulsive than endearing and good hentai lives and dies on how well the human body is drawn. 

You have to have a strong understanding of the human anatomy just so you can bend those rules for unrealistic proportions and still have people invested in the quality of your work. It’s real fucking work drawing good looking pornography. 

Big Mouth isn’t drawn like a show that loves the human body. It’s drawn like a show that kind of sees the body as something gross and it’s half played off for laughs while the other half is reassurance that you’re relatively normal. 

If you were going to make a show about a subject matter like this, you probably can’t do worse than Big Mouth and you probably can’t do any better either. 

Cuties:

Cuties exist supposedly as a way to spark a conversation about how we sexualize young girls. It’s from France so it’s probably more relevant there than it is here but not many people are making that argument. I would make that argument though. After all, France is where the infamous novel “Lolita” was originally published (although to be fair it was written by a Russian). 

French culture is extremely sex positive and the plot is about a Somalian girl acclimating to a dance group that would only exist in the western world and would have the most acceptance in France. 

The mass immigration of people from the Middle East created a culture clash in France and other places where people who abandoned religion have to butt heads with people for whom religion is basically everything. 

Sexuality is condemned in fundamentalist Islamic culture, especially the sexuality of women. I could go on for awhile talking about my theories why and how it speaks to a series of social, emotional, and mental disorders hidden within the members of the Islamic faith but that’s a conversation for a different subject. 

America has problems with sex and sexuality but lets face it, if the Somalian girl was Christian instead of Muslim and set in America there wouldn’t be a film or alternatively there would be a film but it would just be Mean Girls. 

Most stories about sexuality and coming of age is usually about riding that line between being liberated but not so far out that you fall in with bad people who want to exploit your sexuality for profit, physically abuse you for pleasure, or give you a disease that will forever lower your quality of life if not be the lead cause of your own death. 

Many stories of sex are about the regret of even having it or having had it with the wrong people or refusing to have it with the right one until it was too late. 

The real question is “Is Cuties truly a satire of french culture?” 

It can’t be satire of American culture because the abuse of children is met with public derision and disgust when it’s brought to their attention. America is still very religious and the inherently conservative nature of islamic culture can fit within America with only modifications to how it views the concept of punishment for breaking religious rules. 

In order for Cuties to be a commentary on how America sees the sexuality of girls it would have to be pro pedophilia because the antagonist that’s being criticized would be the religious faith and not the hedonism of the Cuties. 

This can however be an critique on how France’s sexual openess is just an excuse for debauchery and sexual exploitation. 

Only the French can say for sure or not, I can’t say if that’s a fair critique, my investigations has led to people affirming that French people are “More honest about romance and sex” which is distressingly vague given the subject matter but I don’t know where the french draw the line so I’ll leave it at that. 

In any case the production of the film regardless of intent is child abuse. Either they exploited the pre-existing sexuality of young girls or they sexualized young girls specifically for the film. Effectively grooming them to be sex pots for the purposes of authenticity. They had hundreds of kids tryout for this as well. 

How many of those children have been raped before or during the production of the film? Even when a child is being hired for a G rated kid’s film or show there’s still a high chance that someone on set, in the studio, or in Hollywood has sexually touched the kids, sometimes with the consent of the parents (I mean the parents get all the money, if you were a selfish prick willing to make your child famous so you could get rich, would you care if Dan Schneider touched your daughter?) 

It’s massively irresponsible at best and at worst, part of the film’s message relied on throwing actual little girl’s into the lion’s den to make a point about how immoral and corrupt french people are. 

It got an award at Sundance. The co-founder of Sundance is a confirmed pedophile. If the intent of the film is to oust french people and non religious people as nonces and nonce enablers well mission accomplished I guess! 

I’ve never seen a film throw everyone that liked it under the bus. 

Well. Does Freddy Got Fingered count? I digress. 

That’s the conversation one is supposed to have about Cuties. I get really fucking annoyed when people say “we need to have a conversation about this.” or “it’s a conversation starter.” but they don’t really initiate a conversation and they use that phrase to end the conversation they are currently in so it’s a lot of bullshit. 

We’re done talking about Cuties but we’re not done here yet. 

Hololive:

Some person named Brittany made some video where she took shots at Shark hololive girl. Said the person was Lolibait and that she had an audience of 40 year old men. 

Where does one begin?

Apparently this person has done this before. I keep thinking of Jessica Valenti which is another person so clearly what this person did or does has been lost to me. I can only assume it involved gamergate or Donald Trump because all roads lead to those two subjects for some bizarre reason. 

But that’s the past. Right now is what matters and right now you can’t just make a video saying that someone makes content exclusively for pedophiles which is what she did. That was some Keemstar level shit right there and I’m under the impression no one will make her regret that choice. Everybody always talks about actions having consequences but it appears like only certain people suffer from the consequences. 

But we’ll see. 

She talked about Hololive like it was another Project Melody. Unfortunately for her it’s not, It’s a real business and a real business is designed to deal with defamation in a serious way so things could get ugly if Yagoo actually thinks his ladies are being threatened by drama mongers. 

These vtubers are doing really well. Pokimane deciding to become a vtuber that is just her normal self but animated is boomer level imitation and extremely funny. 

The appeal isn’t that they’re animated by the way, the appeal is that they’re fun people doing streams. The animation works by letting the audience create a para social relationship with a fictional character of sorts so that the actress can have a private life while still maintaining a streaming setup that’s very personable for the audience. 

This is a meaningful evolution of an online persona.

The only real downside is that anyone who wanted to have an animated avatar in general will be defined as a vtuber when that may not be the intention of the streamer. 

I’m just waiting for one of these girls to be part of an ARG. 

Okay so to wrap up:

Reality shows are trash and always have been.

Indie Films are also trash and only pretentious douche bags like them. 

What happens in France should stay in France. 

and Hololive is GOAT but tragedy of the commons is still a thing. 

[quousque]

finally saw wonder woman

and it was great, but boy oh boy do I have my gripes. I haven’t really seen anyone bitching about any of these, though, which is odd, because I can’t be the only one. Keep in mind that I like the movie and I would see it again. I’m not trying to diss anyone’s favorite film, particularly the first woman-lead (and directed!) big-studio superhero film. I recognize the importance of Wonder Woman as a female-led box office success, and I will heap praises on it on other posts. This one is for critiquing, so here’s the things I want to bitch about:

-they fridged General Antiope. Granted, Diana isn’t a man, so at least it lacked the gendered manpain dynamic, but the plot would not have changed at all if she had lived. Meaning it was a completely unnecessary lesbian death (assuming, as I’m pretty sure is canon, that the distraught Amazon running to Antiope’s side after her death was her girlfriend).

- 95% of the movie was full of the born sexy yesterday trope. If you haven’t seen the video explaining it, go watch it now, but the basic rundown is that for some sci-fi or fantasy reason, there is an incredibly beautiful and sexy woman who is also completely naive about everything, and the friendly helpful man (first man she’s ever seen!) gets to show her How the World Works. Wonder Woman certainly isn’t the grossest example, but boy howdy was it full of it. It made for some cute/funny moments, but it came at the expense of my respect for Diana as a character (seriously, she’s unable to notice that she’s acting strange for the entire time they’re in London, it’s like she’s completely incapable of observation or listening). The prevalence of the Born Sexy Yesterday trope is probably my #1 least favorite thing about the movie.

- For all her idealism about humans being 100% good and her surprise at the pain and suffering caused by war, Diana sure gives zero shits about killing a bunch of soldiers. Killing people should have had more of an impact on her as a character. 

- also, her naivety about how people can be bad sometimes was unrealistic. Either they needed to spend MUCH more time building up the idea that she literally thinks all humans are good 100% of the time unless they’re under some evil influence, OR she should have shed that idea much quicker. I mean, she yells at the British generals for sacrificing soldiers near the start of the movie, so she knows that humans are capable of bad things while not being “influenced by Ares”. Yet somehow, the idea that the soldiers just might keep fighting after she kills Ares never even enters her head, to the point where she’s willing to blow the whole operation- risking thousands of lives- so she can kill Ares. Her belief in utter human goodness could have been interesting, but they needed to play it up much more, like let her have a conversation with Steve where he tells her that humans do bad things all on their own, and she utterly refuses to believe him, or tries to excuse literally every crime/bad act by blaming Ares or something. That would have made her later actions make much more sense. Her continued naivety and lack of basic observational skills made it really hard for me to relate to her as a character, because I was spending too much time being exasperated with her. 

- also, Steve had way to big a role, and was too much the hero, for a movie that’s not supposed to be about him. He’s the one who saved the entirety of London- if Diana had done nothing, London still would have been saved, but if Steve had done nothing, London would be destroyed. Steve orchestrated and planned the mission, got together the ragtag crew of misfits, and directed their goals at every turn, bringing Diana along for firepower. 

Throughout the movie, there was too much Steve and too little Diana. His agency was what directed the plot. Diana’s agency was “I want to stab this dude, steve take me to the dude”. It would have been totally awesome if Diana had planned the attack on the base (whether to destroy the gas or kill Ares, or whatever), and if Diana had assembled the ragtag team of misfits. It should have been Diana gathering information about the current situation with the war and deciding their goal and drawing up their plan of attack. Steve should have been the one offering her information and pointing out when her lack of knowledge about the 20th century causes her to make dumb plans. It should have been her saying “I don’t fit in with these people, Steve show me where I can get clothes like theirs”. Even her big awesome moment- crossing no man’s land- didn’t change the plot that much. If she hadn’t done that, the group would still have crossed, just much more slowly and less dramatically, and it would have taken a few days. 

-General Antiope’s lessons were apparently 100% combat, 0% tactics and strategy. Steve came up with all the plans of attack, and Diana was basically “I have a plan, attack!” Which basically meant that it was Steve and Steve’s sidekicks completing the Big Mission, and Diana was, as I said, really kickass firepower.

-for a movie that’s ostensibly all about how there’s no one big bad guy in a war, it sure managed to have one big bad guy.

- also, I wish they’d let the female villain be the villain. Instead of General Lutendorf or whatever his name was. The stereotypical thing where he’s the volatile threatening man with the awkward semi-sexual, definitely threatening dynamic with the woman who is definitely evil, but it just kinda seems like maybe he’s made her worse than she is and maybe she’s only doing evil stuff at his command.... it was just annoying and old. Let the woman be the fucking villain. Let her be the one making the threats to him, let her be the one to decide that the war is NOT over and kill the generals arguing for peace. Let her be the big fucking evil. I get that they needed a red herring for Ares, and it had to be a guy, but Dr. Poison could still have been the main villain. 

If Dr. Poison were the big bad (of the German side, at least), I think it would have made Diana’s sparing her life that much more meaningful. The movie made Lutendorf the driving force behind the development of the gas, meaning that with Lutendorf gone, Dr. Poison is much less of a threat. That might not be literally true- she could always go off and start making more gas- but, within the plot framework, the villain with the agency to Do the Bad Thing is already gone, so letting Dr. Poison go isn’t really that big a deal. Imagine if Diana had let Lutendorf go. Big difference. 

The moment where Diana refuses to kill her is the Big Moment of the movie, where Diana realizes that yes, humans do bad things of their own volition, but that she’s going to try to save them anyway. As the movie was, she realizes that and refuses to kill what is essentially a tool that the villain used to hurt people. The emotional impact would have been so much more if it were the villain herself- the driving agency behind the villain’s half of the plot- whom Diana decided to save anyway. For an example of this dynamic done right, look at Legend of Korra. Kuvira is the driving force behind all the Bad Shit in season 4- it’s her decisions, her force of will, that does everything Korra’s fighting against. Bataar, her husband, is important to her plans, and is an important male villain, but without him, Kuvira would have done the same things anyway (WW implies that without Lutendorf, Dr. Poison might not have developed that gas). At the end, Korra decides not to kill Kuvira. She chooses to see the part of Kuvira worth saving, and to save her anyway, despite all of the lives she’s taken and destroyed. Diana’s moment would have had similar impact if Dr. Poison had been the big bad in Lutendorf’s place.

- Hippolyta was unrealistically stupid and overprotective. She knows that her daughter is a weapon meant to kill Ares. She knows that Ares will return/has returned. She knows that, at some point, Ares and Diana will fight. And yet, she refuses to tell Diana these things, even when Diana leaves the fucking island to literally find and kill Ares. She also makes it clear that Diana can’t return (why though?) meaning it’s literally her last chance to say anything, and yet she still doesn’t give her this extremely vital information that could possibly save her life. Her reasoning is that if Diana knows, Ares will find her sooner. So basically, her reasoning is, “don’t tell her this extremely vital information, without which it is reasonable to expect that she will lose the fight and die, because if I tell her and thus give her the tools to win the fight, the fight will happen sooner”. She’s going to fight Ares anyway, so just fucking tell her! (also, her literal last words to her daughter are “you are my greatest sorrow”. fucking ouch.)

-also, the romantic subplot seemed contrived and unnecessary (my opinion, your mileage may vary). Seriously, she’s known him for like 2 days, and she just had her aunt and mentor die in her arms, and she’s left her entire home and family forever, and she’s trying to complete a task she’s trained for all her life and save the world, with literally millions of lives depending on her. You’d think she wouldn’t really have the mental space for a romance.

-less of an egregious error, but still a gripe: at the beginning of the movie, Diana seems to consider people in terms of their value in a fight. I forget what line it is, but at one point she’s like “but how do they fight?” (I think it’s talking about the drunk men or something). Also, when Charlie is involved in the bar fight, she says “at least Charlie is good with his fists”, meaning that his redeeming factor is his fighting skills (before finding out, of course, that that guy isn’t Charlie). Later on, she has that truly beautiful moment- that I’ve seen a lot of people praise- where Charlie suggests that he stay behind because he can’t shoot, and Diana says “but who would sing for us?” showing that she believes that people’s non-fighting skills are just as valuable. I don’t think there was enough of a character journey presented on screen to justify that change of attitude in Diana. The potential for a really great character arc is there- especially since it would parallel her whole arc of losing her naivety about human nature- but it just wasn’t there. 

To me, the movie felt like a hero story about Steve, told from Diana’s perspective, with a side dose of her completing her (ultimately mostly inconsequential) goal, and liberally sprinkled with scenes where she’s naive about the world in a funny way and Steve long-sufferingly herds her along, and scenes where she is the ultimate badass, says something dramatic, and then flips a fucking tank (which was AWESOME btw). 

Also, I think it would have been better if they’d let her actually kill Ares. I know she killed him, but I mean, really kill him. She did this classic thing where the hero takes the villains power and throws it back at him, which accomplishes two things: the death is not visceral: she didn’t shoot or stab him, hit him, or in any way damage his body in a traditional fight-y way, and two, it wasn’t really her lethal force and ability that killed him. It’s a thing storytellers use to keep their hero one step removed from the nasty business of killing. Harry Potter is another prime example- Harry doesn’t cast the killing curse at Voldemort, or sectumsempra, or whatever (despite being more than capable), he deflect’s voldemort’s own curse back at him. Disney does this a lot (the villain being the ultimate cause of their own death): Scar being killed by his own hyenas instead of Simba killing him, Frollo falls to his death from his own cathedral into a fire set by his own men, Gaston falls off the roof trying to kill the Beast, blah blah blah. This whole trope (does it have a name yet?) means that yes, technically the hero killed the villain, but the actual thing that does the killing (usually in a way such that the audience doesn’t really see the death) is the villains’ own fault, not the hero’s. Part of the purpose is that usually these deaths come right after some sort of dramatic confrontation, which includes a conversation, and killing someone right after talking to them really looks a lot like cold-blooded murder, no matter how righteous you are, so it looks a lot more heroic if the villain strikes the final blow against themselves.

I think that Diana should have beat the ever-living hell out of Ares with her fists. Only a god is capable of killing a god, and I think she should have killed him with her own power, not by parry-riposting his power back at him. If they were willing to go R-rated, she could have torn his head off (how awesome would that be?). If they wanted to keep it PG-13, and didn’t want her to basically punch him to death, she could have done some sort of ass-pull big-explosion-y strike thingy (no more ass-pull than the crossed bracers + righteous fury = Lightning Rod of Doom). Whatever it is, it should have been Diana’s own power destroying Ares. Also, I think (personal opinion) that after Ares died, we should have just seen his body lying there on the ground instead of the big crater. Right after Diana kills Ares, there’s a scene where the German soldiers pull off their masks and fall down in relief, enemies embracing, etc. It’s supposed to be an incredibly human moment, and I think it would have been improved by having a very human body of Diana’s fallen enemy instead of the hollywood-esque CGI crater. It would have emphasized Diana’s emotional journey, too- instead of cheering because she destroyed a Force of Evil, we would have been forced to recognize that Diana killed someone, and, even though it needed to be done, and she was saving lives by doing it, a life was still ended. A bittersweet moment- Diana recognizes that people can be both good and bad at the same time, and chooses to recognize the good in everyone, spare the life of a very bad person despite her bad-ness, and chooses to believe in love- but, that means killing another being, meaning that Diana, too, is capable of both good and bad- she also has darkness within her. It would have been a very poignant point. (I have a similar gripe with the 8th Harry Potter film- in the book, Voldemort’s body just lies there after he dies, and it’s made clear just how human he was in the end, but in the movie, he disintegrates like some sort of magical video game boss).

Basically, I think the movie undermined its own message by keeping Diana too far from the realities of war and keeping her in a zone of Fantasy Hollywood, where as long as you don’t spend too long looking at the people she punches, it doesn’t matter that she’s killed them (and thus literally killing people for the first time ever has zero affect on her as a character), you can defeat one bad guy and therefore the war is over (despite trying to prove that that isn’t how it works, the movie still worked exactly that way), and the villain isn’t really a person who dies and sits there all gross and dead like a human, they’re just a video-game boss proxy-of-all-evil who vanishes when they die (preferably with an explosion), and just in case, it wasn’t really the hero who killed them anyway, since the villain struck their own final blow. 

You know that moment in the trenches, where Steve tells Diana that they can’t save everyone? And Diana says “fuck that” and crosses No Man’s Land and it’s awesome? There should have been a moment later in the movie where Diana realizes that she really can’t save everyone, even if she does everything 100% right, people will still die. The moment with the gas killing the village doesn’t count, because Diana still believes that if she had stabbed Ares, they wouldn’t have died. There should have been a moment where Diana looks back and realizes that she didn’t make any mistakes, she did literally everything she could have done, everything she should have done, and innocent people still died. That would have been a great character moment.

-One thing I can’t tell if I’m happy or sad about: no “you’re a wonderful woman” or any “wonder woman” title play/pun. Either a missed opportunity, or a merciful omission.

-not really Wonder-Woman specific, since literally all movies forever do this: since when has the super fucking sinister “join me and together we can rule a world that is literally the antithesis of everything you’ve worked for your entire life” villain speech ever worked? How stupid are villains? You sound threatening and ominous, and you’re not even trying to play down the fact that you’re asking me to commit mass murder, also I hate you for personal reasons (usually involving the death of a loved one), of course the fucking answer is no.

So them’s my gripes about Wonder Woman. I did like it though! It was much better than most other superhero movies- I could write much, much longer posts about, say, Avengers, or any of Nolan’s Batman films... I only bitch this much about Wonder Woman because I loved the film and therefore the parts I didn’t like bothered me that much more. Brief list of the parts I did like:

-flipping a fucking tank

-ok, just all the action scenes

-Diana’s fuck you, I’m crossing No Man’s Land

-the way the movie managed to make “I believe in love” and “I believe that love can save the world” actually make sense and not sound stupidly cheesy

- the muscles on the Amazons

-a visibly middle-aged woman in a badass, sexy outfit kicking ass

-ZERO shots of Diana or ANY Amazons designed to show off their asses, boobs, or any other body parts for the male gaze. Yeah, I can gripe about the costumes, but it’s such a minor fucking gripe and part of it being so minor was that the costumes were not in any way a tool for the male gaze. Yay!

-the fight choreography. I thought I’d be quietly burying my annoyance at all the flips and twirls, but that wasn’t really the case. It really fit with who the Amazons were and the world they come from. I have a lot of thoughts about this, actually, but i’ll put that in a different post. Also, it looked really fucking cool.

[my-dear-hammy]

Basking in Firelight-Jamilton Sequel-Part Forty Five

Masterpost

Part Forty-Five: Presidents

AN

I honestly am just making this up as I go along.

Except the ending....And all the really sad bits.

So, I had this done, but then half of it got deleted and now I'm really upset.

----

Warnings below

----

"I came believe you both came out on national television," Burr shook his head in disbelief. "You two had enough enemies as it is and now you've added more. Why can't you just keep your mouths shut for once?"

"Smile more?" Hamilton grinned.

"You lost the homophobic vote," Burr stated.

"I couldn't care less," Hamilton said.

"I have a bone to pick with you two," Mulligan barged in through the door and threw himself into Lafayette's couch. The group tended to hang out there, it felt like a neutral zone. "How come you didn't tell us before you told the whole world?!" Everyone looked at their hands. "Oh don't tell me. Don't tell me everyone knew except me?! What the fuck? Laf?"

"I, ah, figured it out on my own," Lafayette scratched his head nervously, smiling.

"Laurens?"

"Umm, yeah, Lafayette accidentally said a little bit too much at a bar one night."

"Madison?"

"I pretty much blackmailed Hamilton into telling me."

"Burr?"

"It's kinda obvious, isn't it?"

"What the fuck you guys? You all knew all this time and didn't tell me?"

"Sorry, Herc," Hamilton mumbled, "I didn't exactly plan for that to happen, it just kinda did."

Mulligan seemed to shrug it off and looked at the group. "So is everyone here gay?" Burr choked into his drink, Lafayette laughed, Laurens just turned dark red, Jefferson was cackling in the corner. After a moment of looking at the group, Mulligan grinned. "You know what?" he said to Hamilton, "You and Jefferson would make an adorable couple."

Jefferson broke into a fit of coughs, his face turning bright red. Hamilton could feel his own face heat up. "Ahh, come on Herc, leave them alone," Lafayette laughed, diffusing the situation before anything could happen. Jefferson and Hamilton were extremely grateful.

"You know Burr," Laurens began, "even though they don't have the homophobic vote, their polls are still high. Right up there with Adams and Washington. The homophobes are almost extinct anyway. If there was one good thing that came out of the King's rule, it was almost total accepted of the lgbtq+ community."

***

When the news arrived, Jefferson's chest contracted almost painfully. He never thought it would actually happen. Not so soon. Not like this. He needed more time. But he didn't have it. Jefferson's stomach felt queasy. He wasn't ready for this responsibility. He had it before and he didn't want it again. Not when he still had so much of his own stuff to sort through.

He was President.

When Hamilton heard the news, he didn't know what to think. This wasn't how it was supposed to go. History obviously showed that Washington was the first president. He felt elated and nervous all at once. He wanted to throw up. He wanted to pop open a bottle of champagne and dance around.

Then he found out Jefferson was President too.

Fuck.

It made sense. They were the icons of freedom and resistance. They were opposite parties. They've worked together in the war and we're super successful. The people felt as thought they could trust them.

But Jefferson? Jefferson was the last person he wanted as president after Burr. Hamilton pulled up the poll percentages online. He and Jefferson were at the top, then Washington, and a few votes beneath was Burr. Why couldn't it have been Washington instead of Jefferson? Hamilton could've done so much with Washington by his side. But now at every turn, Jefferson would be standing in his way.

But despite how much Hamilton hated knowing he was going to have to serve next to Jefferson, president was still a huge deal. Celebration was in order. Lafayette and Laurens would no doubt be busting down his door any moment to drag him away to the nearest bar. Hamilton didn't feel like getting shit faced drunk with them. He felt like a quiet celebration with a couple of glasses of champagne.

Only, Hamilton didn't keep champagne. If anyone kept champagne, it'd be Jefferson. That was his type of alcohol. Hamilton made his way to the hotel lobby where he'd hail a cab. The entire way over he kept telling himself that there was no helping it. He didn't have any champagne, but Jefferson would. And it was only proper to celebrate with other guy who got elected, who just so happened to be Jefferson too. Deep down, Hamilton knew they were all excuses and that he just wanted to see him. But he would never admit it.

By the time he was standing on Jefferson's doorstep, he was nervously running his hand through his hair, tapping his foot and drumming his fingers against his leg.

Jefferson opened the door and immediately stepped aside when he saw it was Hamilton, letting him enter without hesitation. "What're you doing here?" he asked.

"Celebrating," Hamilton said, making his way to the kitchen.

"And you had to do that here?" Jefferson asked, closing the door.

"I didn't have any champagne," he answered easily, pulling a bottle from Jefferson's cupboard.

"Hotel room service couldn't provide?"

"And I figured I should celebrate with the other elected party, that just happens to be you."

Jefferson reached into a high cupboard over Hamilton's head, grabbed a couple of champagne glasses with his long fingers and stole the bottle from Hamilton's hands in one fluid motion. Setting the glasses down of the counter he looked at Hamilton, "Let's celebrate then." He popped the cork and sloshed the liquid into the glasses expertly, handing one off to Hamilton. "To the elections, Mr. President," Jefferson held out his glass in a toast.

"May we serve through easy times." Hamilton touched his glass to Jefferson before lifting the glass to his lips. "How's it feel to be president again?" Hamilton asked as Jefferson led them into the living room and plopped down on the couch.

"I can feel the stress already," he sighed, looking up at Hamilton as he stood there.

"It can't be that bad," Hamilton said, sinking into the sofa next to Jefferson, "It's not like we're on the verge of war with France and England this time."

"Say that again when you're actually behind the desk instead of critiquing from the sidelines. The stress builds up in your chest and locks up your back."

"I know. I used to run out all your knots when you came home from the office."

"You did? I can't recall."

"I know. It's okay, don't worry about it," Hamilton said, sipping at his champagne, leaning back comfortably into the couch, eyes closed, enjoying the peace for once.

Jefferson studied Hamilton as he relaxed. It was odd. Not long ago, Hamilton was always tense around Jefferson, ready to leap up and run out the door at moment's notice. Watching Jefferson with hopeful eyes whenever he said something that might spark his memory and the disappointment when nothing did. Now he just seemed so comfortable. Jefferson could remember the hate between them from arguing over the new government and where it would go. He could still feel that burning hatred in his chest.

No. Not hatred, but still burning. Hot and heavy and intense. He suddenly felt Hamilton's hands tugging at his hair, clawing down his bare back. The heat radiating from where their bodies were pressed together, Hamilton pinned beneath him. The heavy breathing, the gasps, the moans.

Jefferson blinked. Hamilton hadn't moved, was still sipping his champagne, not a care in the world. Jefferson tried not to look at his soft lips or imagine how Hamilton's silky hair would feel in his hands. It would be so easy. So so easy, for Jefferson to lean down, to pin Hamilton beneath him, reenact what he just felt. His body was on fire.

No. He couldn't. Never. It wasn't right. The two presidents could have and affair with each other. It was impossible. Scandalous. There was no way Jefferson could ever do such a thing. He'd be out of office in the blink of an eye.

Hamilton opened his eyes to find Jefferson staring at him. It was obvious that he was deep in thought be the way his eyes were unfocused and glazed over. He was probably thinking about the responsibility of being president again. Hamilton was anxious too.

"What're you thinking about?" Hamilton asked.

Jefferson jolted from out of his head, his face flushing deeply. "The presidency," he stammered.

Jefferson never stammered. Ever. He was always cool, collected, and every word had eloquence to it. But Hamilton didn't imagine it. "Anything in particular?" he questioned.

"Not really," Jefferson tried to say smoothly but failed, his face somehow managing to turn redder.

Hamilton suppressed a smile. There was only one line of thought that could have that effect on Jefferson. But he couldn't be sure. Hamilton sat up and leaned forward, Jefferson shifted nervously in response. Yep, Hamilton was right. He shifted slightly and settled back down into the couch as if his intention was always just to reposition.

Jefferson slowly relaxed and they both went back to quietly sipping their champagne. Hamilton wasn't going to do a damn thing. Nope. He fucked up once before when he was drunk, he had no intention of doing it again. Jefferson had built up the courage to make the first move in a time when it was illegal, he could build up the gall again and move when he was ready.

They were enjoying their quiet celebration, that is, until Lafayette, Laurens, and Mulligan busted down Jefferson's door. Literally. The hinges tore from the wall and the door fell heavily to the ground with a thud.

Hamilton and Jefferson were on their feet in an instant, both aiming pistols at the intruders. Hamilton pulled his from his holster, but he had no idea where Jefferson's gleaming silver gun appeared from. It was like magic. When they both realized who the others were, they put their weapons away.

"What did you do to my door?!"

"I'm sorry Jefferson, but your door looked lonely so we gave it a hug," Laurens answered.

"And what were you two doing on the couch? Leaping up so suddenly?" Lafayette asked knowingly.

Hamilton stalked over and poured his champagne over Lafayette's head, "Drinking champagne and celebrating," Hamilton said, "That's all," he hissed quietly.

"Celebrating?! You call this celebrating?" Mulligan asked. "Nuh uh, this isn't even close. This is not the proper way to celebrate becoming presidents."

Jefferson rolled his eyes, draining the last of his champagne. Hamilton and Jefferson were then dragged from the house, taken prisoners by their own friends so they could be shown how to celebrate properly.

----

Warnings: alcohol, sexual thoughts

[sortyourlifeoutmate]

@glorious74​ put up a thing and I thought what better way to spend the ailing hours of my Monday evening then by writing about myself? It's been a slow day.

Fun Basics

Preferred writing type: Short stories. Occasional, fumbling efforts at anything longer. Wait. Did you mean for me or for the people I like to read? What? Nevermind.

Favourite genre(s) to write: Uh, sci-fi I guess? I really don't know. Hey! Pro-tip for success: KNOW YOUR GENRE!

Favourite genre(s) to read: Sci-fi, fantasy, uh, non-fiction. Kinda depends more on style than anything else...

Favourite standalone book(s): Standalone book? You mean, like, a book that had no sequel? Oh, wasn't part of a series, I getcha. Uh. I'd say Dirk Gentley but that got a sequel so that doesn't really count, sadly.

Favourite Book Series: Oh I couldn't possibly say! So many to choose from! What mood am I in? Discworld? Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy? Eisenhorn trilogy? Dresden Files? I CANNOT PICK! Hitchhikers probably influenced me most, though.

Favourite Movie(s): Brazil

Favourite TV show(s): I don't, uh, really watch much television. I tend to drift off and lose interest...Generation Kill was good! And, uh, super-old now.

Other Fandoms You’re interested in: The hell is a fandom? I like stuff, is that what this is? I like lots of stuff. Like, too many stuffs to really list them. Am I involved in talking to any other people who like the same stuff as me? No. Because I'm not a people person. In case you hadn't noticed!

Zodiac sign: Uh, Scorpio? I don't know.

MBTI Type: I've never done one of these tests and so I have no idea. Whichever one is the type of person you (yes, you) would least like to talk to. That's me.

Introvert of Extrovert: Introvert. If I had to pick. I'm mostly just an arsehole.

Favourite Season: Winter. I can wear my coat.

Spirit animal: I don't have a spirit? Or an animal? I'm a husk of a man.

Hobbies/interests other than writing: Watchin' things, playin' things, learnin' about religion and other things, militaria, staring into space and waiting for death. The usual, you know?

Cat person, dog person, or both?: I've only ever owned cats but dogs are lovely and I love to look at 'em

Writing Style Nitty-Gritty

Number/Names of WIPs: Oh, lots! I am forever starting things and not finishing them. Some more started than others! We got, uh, Cold Hard Hugs, Jessica Dresses Like a Dragon, Proper Schooling, Snowblind (my NaNo I need to finish and re-write), the re-write I wanna do of that, uh, other thing I did – Run For It, that was it. Oh Lord, many other things. More short stories than I know what to do with. SO MANY THINGS. And they're all hot garbage.

Favourite Book about writing: Uh. How Not to Write a Novel was funny, but didn't really tell me anything I didn't already know. Ya know?

Planner, panster, or plantser: Plah-nihng? What is this word? It sounds scary to me. For real though, I throw a bunch of ideas onto a blank sheet and write out whichever chunks I had in my head, lose momentum, get bored and go somewhere else. Hmm, can't think why I've never finished anything of any substantial length!

Favorite Outlining method: Shoving things into the windy and neglected corners of my skull and hoping they stay in the correct order.

Types of blogs you followed for reference: What?

Reference topics you would like blog suggestions for: What again?

Types of blogs you followed for inspiration: Inspiration is not something I typically experience. Like excitement. I think that part of me died.

Do you write on a schedule or sporadically?: In much the same way that a constant dribble of water will wear away a rock given enough time, my constant trickle of words here and there will wear away...something, eventually. My life, probably. I write as a reflex, when I'm not wasting time doing something else.

Any creativity rituals that you use: Is it after midnight? Do I have to wake up for work in a few hours?  Am I exhausted? Then it is time to be seized by an intense desire to write. That's not really a ritual, actually. More of a cruel joke.

Your writing community

Current writing / creative communities you participate in: 'Participate'. Ahem. I'm not really involved in anything. I'm more like the spectre at the feast more than anything else. A hideous, haunting apparation skirting around the edges, tormented and confused. There was a local writing society in my town but they never got back to me. I doubt I'll hear from them again.

Are you part of any critique groups (local or online)?: Nope.

Would you Like to find online critique partners/groups?: People terrify me, I am a shitty font of useful criticism myself so would feel wrong inflicting myself on anyone and more to the point very few people want to read anything I write. It's all for me, Damien! Wait, what, no. That's the Omen. And it's not even right!

Would you like to be a beta-reader if someone needs one?: I've never had it explained to me why these are called 'betas'. Is the author the alpha? I don't get it. Anyway, I refer you to my previous comments about being shit at feedback.

How long have you been on tumblr: I honestly can't remember.

Would you like to be tagged in any writing games / questionnaries?: I won't be.

How do you feel about being messaged and / or tagged to discuss writing?: Again, I won't be. Spectre at the feast, remember? WoOoOoOoOoO!

Are you following #365k365dat or #spontaneouswriteblr?: I'm gonna go...no. Not heard of them.

Your Online Community Info

NanoWriMo Community Name (if applicable): Krazmaz

Wattpad Community Name (if applicable): JJMarmite

Fanfiction.net or AO3 community Name (if applicable): Of Questionable Veracity

DeviantArt Community Name (if applicable): Ha ha ha! Noooooo.

Patreon Community Name (if applicable): Who in their right mind would ever pay me?!

I'd tag people but I don't really have anyone I can tag. Apart from @phormaldehyde I guess? @behind-the-sun If you want?

I've made enough noise as it is.

[wehaveabullyingproblem]

DIVISIVENESS AND SELF-DESTRUCTION IN THE WOMEN'S MOVEMENT

DIVISIVENESS AND SELF-DESTRUCTION IN THE WOMEN'S MOVEMENT by Anselma dell'Olio

(Read at the May 1970 meeting of the Congress to Unite Women, New York; published in the Chicago Women's Liberation Union Newsletter, July 1970)

I have come to announce my swan-song to the women's movement. I am returning to the hordes of women living out their lives in quiet desperation. And I go with the sorrow and in the depths of despair known only to those who fall defeated just as they think that victory is in sight. I can think of no greater cruelty. Disappointment is far too mild a word. I have been destroyed. Defeated by myself perhaps, with a big push from my sisters in the struggle. I have decided to speak to you, instead of leaving quietly, in the hopes of preventing others from being destroyed and defeated as I have been. I learned 3½ years ago that women had always been divided against one another, were self-destructive and filled with impotent rage. I thought the movement would change all that. I never dreamed that I would see the day when this rage, masquerading as pseudo-egalitarian radicalism under the "pro-woman" banner, would turn into frighteningly vicious anti-intellectual fascism of the left, and used within the movement to strike down sisters singled out for punishment with all the subtlety and justice of a kangaroo court of the Ku Klux Klan. I am referring, of course, to the personal attacks, both overt and insidious, to which women in the movement, who have painfully managed any degree of achievement, have been subjected.

These attacks take different forms. The most common and pervasive is character assassination; the attempt to undermine and destroy belief in the integrity of the individual under attack. Needless to say this generally takes place behind the woman’s back. Another form is the "purge". This is also done by devious methods and usually takes the form of phone calls to the woman's friends or group-members, sometimes followed by a meeting carefully convocated without the knowledge of the woman to be purged. In other words, the ultimate tactic is to isolate her. If she has a close friend in the group, that friend is told the group finds their relationship destructive. The power of suggestion and collective attack is used to elicit grievances or problems that are likely to exist in any relationship. These are then played upon and the friend is co-opted if that is at all possible… and this is made attractive as she is offered to be taken to the bosom of a whole new set of "friends" who will applaud her courage and second her decision should she show signs of faltering. If the friend persists in her loyalty and insists that the only honest thing to do is to confront the woman personally, the deed is exposed -- but the damage is done. The rape of the ego is accomplished in any case. Before we got it from men, now we’re getting it from our sisters -- and often from those who espouse the pro-woman line the most strongly. Those whose surface personalities are the least "forceful", the most "feminine" or "womanly" -- and who do they attack? Generally two categories -- some women are unlucky to fall into both -- achievement or accomplishment of any kind would seem to be the worst crime. Write a book, publish an article, appear on TV, be interviewed in the newspapers, start a theater group dedicated to feminist principles, make a film, be asked to give a lecture and do it well so that you're asked back again or referred to other places. Do anything, in short, that every other woman secretly or otherwise feels she could do just as well -- and baby, watch out, because you're in for it. If then, God forbid, you should also have the qualities of the second category open to attack, buy yourself a suit of armour, or head for the Himalayas; that is, you are assertive, have what is generally described as a "forceful personality", if you "come on strong" even if you're talking about potato chips… if, in short, you do not fit the conventional stereotype of a "feminine" woman -- if you are a bitch -- forget it baby, it's all over, unless you have the patience of Penelope, the shell of an armadillo and the perennial optimism of Voltaire's "Candide" -- in which case what the hell do you need the women's movement for anyway?

If you are in the first category (an achiever) you are immediately labelled a thrill-seeking opportunist, a ruthless mercenary, out to make her fame and fortune over the dead bodies of selfless sisters who have buried their abilities and sacrificed their ambitions for the greater glory of Feminism. Productivity seems to be the major crime -- but if you have the misfortune of being outspoken and articulate, you are also accused of being power-mad, elitist, fascist, and finally the worst epithet of all: A MALE IDENTIFIER, AAARRGGG!!

The interesting thing about these attacks is that they are seldom if ever, logical, consistent, or in good faith. Whether the attack takes the form of back-biting invective, or even more insidiously a "straight-from-the-shoulder" "We're telling you this for you own good" or "everybody agrees with us" or a last ditch "my politics are superior and you're a decadent sell-out" and "you'll be ostracized if you don’t go along," it (the attack) is invariably couched in the best New Left-cum-Women's Lib rhetoric.

To emerge unscathed from this kind of assault is impossible. The effects I have observed, to name just a few, are 1) gradual or immediate decrease in productivity; 2) an upsurge in self-doubt; 3) depletion of whatever ego-strength had been salvaged from our pasts or recovered during the early stages of the movement; 4) an increase in impotence and passivity coupled with a rampant paranoia (completely justified); 5) a severe dropping off of self-confidence and faith in one's ability; 6) a detailed and obsessive self-examination for real or imagined sins which is completely useless since the mind-fucking has destroyed objectivity.

I do not feel that I have stated the case too strongly. However, my intention was not just to bring this festering sore into the open, but to suggest some concrete guidelines to correct the situation, before we lose or destroy some of the best minds this movement is ever likely to have.

1)      Beware of criticizing achievements by others in the movement. Examine your conscience; are you sure you are not being motivated by jealousy or envy?

2)      It is natural for a woman to feel creatively "blocked". Perhaps hose who have broken through the "block" can help you. That's what this movement is all about.

3)      Fear of competition is nothing to be ashamed of if you can admit it and confront it and not allow it to cloud your opinions of another's accomplishments.

4)      Watch your motives when you are telling another woman "what's good for her" or when you are criticizing other peoples' relationships. (i.e. "I think your friendship with X is destructive.")

5)      Be cautious about using movement rhetoric to justify personality conflicts or personal grievances.

6)      Don't fall into the trap of confusing leadership qualities with a desire to "be a leader". In the same vein, don't confuse achievement or productivity with a desire to be a leader.

7)      As long as we have rejected the masculine definition of "feminine behavior" let's not fall into the trap of feeling antagonism towards women with forceful or assertive personalities.

8)      Remember there are all kinds of ways to manipulate. Manipulation can be exerted just as much by a docile, sweet-natured person as it can be by a forceful person -- and it's a good deal less obvious, therefore more potentially dangerous.

9)      Women with aggressive / assertive personalities have been getting flack all their lives for not being "lady-like" or feminine enough. They didn't join the movement to get the same shit from their sisters just because the words have changed from "unlady-like" to "male-identifier".

10)   A desire for power is no more an automatic consequence of a forceful personality than it is of a non-forceful one.

11)   "STRONG" women do not necessarily want power. "WEAK" women do not necessarily NOT want power.

12)   Participants in consciousness-raising sessions should learn to deal with personal animosities towards members of the group openly and honestly and explicitly during the session itself, WHILE THE MEMBER UNDER DISCUSSION IS PRESENT.

a) The discussion should be motivated by a genuine desire for mutual enlightenment rather than a subterranean desire for a personal attack.

b) The discussion should foster group unity and a better understanding of how women perpetuate their own oppression on each other and thus remain divided, just as men have divided us all along.

c) The group should keep in mind the destructive potential of such a discussion, especially if critiques of personalities come into play.

d) If the discussion at any time shows signs of being or becoming a personal attack, it is the responsibility of each woman to intercede immediately, and draw attention to this fact.

e) No matter what happens, we should always have the assurance of mutual support. If differences cannot be resolved, discuss the possibility of splitting into different groups openly before doing so, with all members of the original group present.

One last plea: If we women are ever to pull ourselves out of the morass of self-pity, self-destruction and impotence which has been our heritage for as long as we can remember, then it is perhaps even more important that we be as supportive of each other's achievements and successes and strengths, than it is for us to be compassionate and understanding of each other's failures and weaknesses.

[coffee-n-some-cream]

The Space I Filled - Chapter 4: Mr. Lonely

Did Tim feel guilty? Yes. Telling her his identity as a sign of trust didn't really have the same meaning when your identity is a fake one anyway. He introduced himself as Gabriel, bartender and parttime vigilante. His parents had died at an early age due to gang violence and he wanted to rid the city of crime because of it. Nope, he had never met any other superheroes, Batman was just as mysterious to him as he was to her. Superman? Of course not. He was but a smalltime vigilante, he had never even been to America.

She ate up what he told her, and he had to remind himself that there was a good reason he didn't just go around telling everyone he got to know who he really was. She trained well, learned quickly and eagerly, and he genuinely enjoyed teaching her, enjoyed seeing her grow into a strong fighter.

He had been training her for a few months when he asked her who she wanted to be.

"Who?"

"Yeah. Who do you want to be when you get out there and actually start fighting crime? I chose Red X. Have you thought about it?"

"Oh... Yeah, I kind of have. I thought maybe something similar to yours could work. Like Black X, or just X, or... I don't know, something with X in it."

He nodded and offered her a smile. "How about X-girl?"

She made a face at him and he laughed, ruffling her hair to let her know he was only teasing. "Or Lower Case X, that works too." That made her swipe at him, and he let her hit his arm good naturedly.

"What about... something with Red in it instead of X? Like just Red, maybe."

Tim nodded, approving. "Red sounds good. Red X and Red, has a nice ring to it."

She grinned at him and he grinned back before sending her off to do her bo staff practice.

*

Their first patrol was so imperfect it was perfect. He watched her make so many of the same rookie mistakes he had made, and there was that one time she took forever to shoot her grapple and he nearly had a heart attack because he thought it had jammed or something, but she was just enjoying the free fall. He had her back, took out the people that she wasn't keeping an eye on like she should have been, snagged the back of her suit when she got a bit too close to the edge of a building and yanked her back. He ruffled her shock of black hair and let her take the spotlight when they dropped in on some bad guys. He thought that this must be what a parent felt like when they watched their baby walk for the first time, or dropped them off at the first day of kindergarten. At the end of it all, he told her he was proud of her, and she fluffed up with pride like a cockatiel.

After that, the criminal world of Fortaleza knew to watch out for both of them.

"My crew got taken down by the Reds last night."

"Don't go after Red, X is always close behind her."

"Do you think she's his kid?"

"Figures. This always happens with them vigilante types. One pops up and then they start multiplying. We're gonna be the next Gotham, wait and see."

It wasn't long before Red started earning a reputation of her own, outside the shadows of Red X's. She was the cheery one, the one who went soft on you. The one who laughed as she swung above you, the one who hugged the scared kids until they quieted down, the one who could get a chuckle out of Red X. The one who always asked, "Why are you doing this?" before attacking. But if you answered wrong, she could kick your ass, that was for damn sure.

And Red X, the original, well he just loved her to death, didn't he? Sometimes he would just sit at the edge of a building and watch her take out a group, calling out encouragements, compliments, and critiques on her form, the distortion caused by his mask making his voice mechanical and high pitched. He would lurk behind her as she interrogated people, giving her tips on how to be scarier. They had a fantastic good cop, bad cop routine.

Suffice it to say, they were successful. The criminal world feared them, they did good work, and still remained fairly discreet among the everyday people. Nobody had even gotten a grainy picture of them.

He stood on a tall building in the early night and watched Adriana out of the corner of his eye. She stood proud, her short, red cape blowing behind her, one booted foot resting on the rise on the edge of the roof. She turned to look at him, smiling, eyes probably crinkling under the black domino that took up nearly half her face. He ruffled her hair, then took off into the night, knowing she would follow. This was probably the happiest he had been in years. Having someone with him, to watch out for, to share his less mild-mannered alter ego with. It felt good.

*

"I'll see you later, Gabe," she called over her shoulder as she made her way out of his basement and up the stairs, slumping withe exhaustion from another night of crimefighting.

"Yup. Remember, don't come over tomorrow, you're getting the night off," he answered.

That made her pause. She turned, halfway up the stairs, and stared at him. "What? Why?"

He turned to give her a look. "You have school the next day. You need sleep."

She blinked at him with wide eyes, and he knew she thought he had forgotten. He thought back to nights like this with Bruce, how Tim hated being kept away from his vigilante duties but was forced to get a good nights sleep anyway.

"But- but I can't just ditch my Red gig for something like," she scrunched her nose up, "school."

"Yes you can, and you will. School is important, trust me. Just go. I've worked on my own before, I'm sure I'll manage without you."

"But-" she started again, but he just shot her a look that always seemed to get her to quiet down, and she sighed and looked away. "Fine."

He nodded and said, "Goodnight, Adriana."

"'Night," came her disappointed reply.

After her footsteps retreated and he heard the door to his house slam shut, he sat down at this workdesk and began cleaning his weapons. A shuriken, black and gleaming, that had a few flecks of blood on it. He wiped it down, polishing it until he could see himself in it. Setting it aside, he started on one of Adriana's shuriken, which had red highlights when you held it up to the light. The cloth rubbed over the sharp edges, and Tim stared down at it, thinking about how she had accidentally hit it against an alley wall, blunting the point.

He had done that a few times, he remembered, back when he was Robin. A slight twist of his wrist in the wrong direction and the shuriken had flown off course, barely grazing Two Face's ear and hitting the wall behind him. He had dove at him, seeing the opening he had left. Dick had made up for it, getting Two Face with a perfectly aimed batarang, and Tim had felt horribly embarassed at his mistake. But Dick had just laughed and ruffled his hair, telling him that he had done the same exact thing a million times.

Tim remembered the weight of his hand on his head, the comfort it had brought. The feeling that even if he messed up, someone had his back. He remembered how Dick had told Bruce that Tim had done well that night, not mentioning the little mishap, and Bruce had nodded approvingly at Tim.

Tim remembered how Kon asked him one time how he never missed with the shuriken, and Tim had smiled and said, "I missed so many times when I started out that luck is just paying me back now." And Kon had snorted, amused.

He remembered having a throwing competition with Steph and soundly beating her, and she had been pissed about it for days even though he hadn't even gloated. He remembered giving Cass a really nice set of them for Christmas one year. He remembered Jason starting to throw a few at him, before realizing who he was and saying, "Jesus, Replacement, warn a guy."

He remembered how he fell asleep polishing them one night, and had woken up to a blanket draped around his shoulders, surely Alfred's doing. He remembered the warmth at the thought, the feeling of having someone looking out for him. He remembered feeling safe.

Tim snapped back to reality with a start, realizing that he was gripping the shuriken with his fingers and blood was dripping from them and onto the table.

"Shit," he muttered, and grabbed a cloth to stem the bleeding, dropping the weapon on the table.

He sighed and looked at it, thinking that he would have to clean it all over again. He looked back to his hands, trying to stop them from trembling, and took a shaky breath.

He couldn't... he couldn't do this anymore. He couldn't stand being alone like this. He had Adriana, but it wasn't the same as having his family. His brothers, his sister, Bruce, Steph, Babs, Alfred. God, he missed Alfred's hot chocolate, how the butler always seemed to know when Tim needed a mug of it and someone to talk to. He missed Oracle's voice over his comm, how he never felt alone with her in his ear. He missed Steph's laughter as they soared through the air. He missed Kon's smile when Tim said something funny. He missed the spats with Jason and Damian, he missed Cass's silent communication, he even missed Bruce's silent lack of communication. He missed Dick's hand on his shoulder.

Tim put his head on the worktable, not caring that he was getting his own blood in his hair, not caring that his tears were falling down to mingle with the blood.

"I miss you," he whispered, choking on his own breath, and gripped the cloth painfully against his hand. "I miss you, I miss you, I miss you, I miss you..."