#WHY THE FUCK ISN’T HE BOTHERED DOES HE NOT CARE IS IT NOT IMPORTANT TO HIM

[deadandwalking]

SCREAMS AND CRIES AND PUKES AND MOANS AND CONVULSES

[mycroftrh]

I just keep thinking about how Crystal is still a Mean Girl - she starts right off by trying to insult Charles, she gets vicious at both Charles and Edwin, she enjoys tormenting Twitchy Richie - but surrounded by better people than she used to be she is able to become someone good, nevertheless

And on the one hand, the obvious hand, you have Charles. He gets insulted and just goes “I’ve spent the last 30 years with the person I love most in the world insulting me any time he gets moody; I know it’s not really meant and he actually loves me; why would I bother getting upset about this?” and lets it slide off him without a moment’s notice, not even considering rising to it. Crystal doesn’t get what she expects to get out of it when she’s mean, and it’s obvious how that helps her in learning other ways of interacting with people

But on the other hand I don’t think we can discount how Edwin helps, either. He DOES rise to it, he gets just as vicious right back - and then displays care and concern and kindness for her. He lets her get her meanness out but shows her that being vicious with your words doesn’t have to mean being vicious with your heart. He bickers with her, gives her an outlet, and then goes back to treating her exactly the same as before their superficially venomous argument.

And, again, she doesn’t get out of it what she expects to get out of being mean, because he rises to it: he doesn’t get beaten down. He isn’t scared or cowed, she doesn’t get a rush of power; he isn’t pushed away, she doesn’t get the safety of solitude; he isn’t sad or hurt; he isn’t even angry in the “any attention is good attention” way her neglected heart craves. He just treats this as part of the natural course of interaction, unaffected; regardless of how she talks to him he still just treats her the same way he would any other living girl at first (except Niko, of course, you’re an angel and we’re all delighted you’re here) and then like a friend.

That’s also sorta mirrored with Niko and Jenny: Niko fails to even consider the possibility of Crystal being mean, and that helps; but also Jenny does get cussed and snapped at and does react but maintains a steadying presence, letting it slide off in her own way that involves saying “what the fuck” and then going back to being quietly, albeit profanely, kind, and that helps, too.

I dunno just! Edwin and Crystal’s friendship and how they can take their bitchiness out on each other while still caring about each other and how that helps Crystal change, it’s important to me.

[trippinsorrows]

looking through your eyes + nineteen

authors note: this one has....some surprising twists and connections. that's for sure....

cw/tw: angst, fluff, and characters using dark humor to discuss mental health

song inspo: ‘looking through your eyes’ by leann rimes

masterlist + story playlist + taglist request form

words: 8k

Roman’s never been the type to really push things off. Not important things, at least. And seldom in his life has his to-do list ever really consisted of non-essentials. There’s always something to be done, a task to be handled, body or bodies to drop. 

But always at the top of the non-essential list has been his appointments with Dr. Michaels. They’ve always been more annoying than anything, annual routine check-ups that are required with his role as the Tribal Chief. To make sure he’s healthy and equipped for the job. Appointments the Elders are sure to stay on top of, which is also a large reason he hates them.

The Elders tried so hard at the beginning to stop and prevent him from taking his rightful place at the Head of the Table once he turned 18. Questioning his readiness, his eligibility (largely to him being afakasi), and even more, his capability. 

To be honest, it’s a major reason as to why Roman will never really respect them. For men who are supposed to uphold tradition, they seemed to throw that out the fucking window and jump through every available hoop to prevent him from fulfilling his father’s role. To stop a generational dynasty. 

It’s largely why Roman was so focused and dedicated at the beginning of his reign to prove them wrong. To prove them all wrong. 

Something he continues and will always do.

A knock on the door is followed up with the entrance of the man Roman could go the rest of his life without seeing. “Well, congratulations.” Roman maintains his bored expression, mentally going over the next items of his to-do list rather than entertaining his doctor. “You have the sperm count of a man in his twenties.”

That’s another annoying thing. The yearly tests to continue to monitor his ability to reproduce. Something he, like most things in life, passes with flying colors. 

“I’m sure the Elders will be thrilled to hear that.” Probably. Not that Roman gives a flying fuck. “What I’m not pleased with is your blood pressure.” Roman is slightly more present and engaged in the conversation at that. “Your numbers came back even higher this time, Roman. And while you’re not in the danger zone just yet, you keep this shit up of not taking this seriously, you will be.”

Yeah, the attention is fully present and focused now. Roman maintains a leveled voice while asking, “what the hell does that mean?”

Dr. Michaels sighs heavily, moving to sit on his stool, explaining carefully. “You have hypertension. It’s chronic, so it’s not going to go away by avoiding it. You have to take your medication as prescribed. That’s the only thing that will keep it managed.”

Roman looks away, rolling his shoulders. “It’s not that I don’t fucking take it.” And that’s the truth. When Roman remembers, he does. Or when he actually cares enough to, he’ll pop the pill in his mouth and down it with one of his energy drinks. 

“Every day?” Roman doesn’t bother with a reply, growing irritated at being scolded like he’s a fucking child. “Continue to fuck around with this, and you’re putting yourself at high risk for heart disease or stroke.”

Those two things seem almost impossible, like they shouldn’t even be used in the same sentence or paragraph as him or anything related to him. Roman is in excellent shape, works out at least twice a day, eats relatively well, doesn’t smoke or do drugs. Rarely drinks. All the good shit. 

All the healthy shit most medical providers recommend. Isn’t that enough?

It’s like the old man has uninvited access to Roman’s thought process, adding, “Hypertension is hereditary. Your dad had it. Your uncle had it. So, it only makes sense, especially with who you are and what you do, that you got it as well.” Jaw clenching, Roman refuses to comment on that. Refuses to discuss anything regarding his family. “You were technically in the prehypertension stage before, hence why I put you on meds to keep it from progressing. But, now you’re in the stage one hypertension range. Do you really wanna know and see what stage two would look like?”

Thankfully, Shawn doesn’t wait for a reply, continuing his long ass spiel. “You take such good care of yourself physically, but this one thing seems to be an issue for you?” When Roman still says nothing or even makes eye contact, Dr. Michaels goes for a different angle. “If you’re not going to do it for you, at least do it for that wife of yours.” That is when Roman’s sharp gaze lands back on his doctor. “She was a nervous wreck that night you were shot. Imagine what something happening to you that was avoidable would do to her.”

Damn him. 

For all intents and purposes, Roman does an excellent job at hiding the fact that Dr. Michaels found it. Found the thing that truly catches Roman’s attention. Solana always worries so much about him, especially this high blood pressure shit. He doesn’t even want to think about how she would react if she knew his numbers had gotten worse, that he’d slacked off a bunch on medication adherence since she’s been gone, since everything went down. 

She’d freak the fuck out, be an emotional mess, and it’d be all because of him.

Roman can’t have that. 

He won’t.

With a newfound purpose and reason to actually switch this topic from irrelevant to relevant, he relents, “fine. I’ll take the damn medication.”

“As prescribed?”

Smiling without an ounce of humor, Roman nods, reminding himself that it’s probably not a good idea to kill the doctor he’s had since he was 14. Michaels can be annoying, but he’s effective and hasn’t been a problem for the Tribal Chief. For the most part, at least. “Yes.”

Dr. Michaels chuckles. “Thank you.” He then stands up, looking down at his tablet and starts tapping around. “Unfortunately, because your numbers have jumped as much as they have, I need to up your dosage. I’ll send the script over to the pharmacy and make sure they have it filled today so you can pick it up today. Start tomorrow morning. Not next week. Or next year. Tomorrow. Alright?”

Not bothering to reply, Michaels walks over to him, smile almost sympathetic. “Good seeing you, big guy.” Roman scowls with borderline disgust at the light pat on his shoulder. “I’ll follow up with you in a month.”

Roman’s irritation spikes again. “A month? Why so soon?”

Hand on the door, Dr. Michaels shrugs and explains. “Gotta start monitoring your numbers more closely now.” He smirks a bit, taunting almost. “See if you’re as good at following directions as you are at giving them.” 

It’s when the door closes that Roman releases the heavy sigh. Always fucking something. Yet another thing added to his list. 

Of course. 

Roman stays annoyed, even as he’s escorted back into his office, the only thing keeping him from being completely vexed is the reminder that pops up on his phone. 

Visit with Sol

He’s scheduled to drive down to the treatment facility and spend the evening with Solana this evening. Something he’d never openly acknowledge to anyone other than her that he’s been looking forward to all week. 

Today marks two weeks since she transferred to residential treatment, and despite much more lax policies regarding personal items and even visitation, this will only be his second time seeing her.

And not because he hasn’t wanted to. 

No. Solana herself requested they stick to visits once a week versus more. Citing she wants to do this “on her own” as much as possible. The initial wording concerned him. He never wants her to feel like she’s alone in anything, but her follow up explanation provided him clarity on just what she meant. 

“You believe in and support me” A light shrug of her shoulders and gentle gleam in her pretty brown eyes as she adds with a determined nod. “I have to believe in and support me too.”

He checks in on her throughout the week, of course. And she keeps him updated on things like her individual and group therapy, even sharing photos of art she creates during down time. It helps that she’s allowed her phone this time around. Not that it would have made a difference if she wasn’t. There’s no way in hell he would allow her to be that far away without a way to directly communicate with him. Sure, Bautista is there, but still. 

Not enough.

But, it’s as Roman walks back into his office, any excitement at the thoughts of seeing his wife in person, being able to hold her and kiss her is dashed away. 

Replaced with well-hidden shock and irritation.

“What the fuck are you doing here?

There are two people in his office. Two uninvited people. One sits in his chair at his desk. The other sits on the edge of his desk. He recognizes one of them, but not the other. It takes a second for that recognition to dawn. It’s been years since he last saw him. He looks older, obviously, but outside of that, not much has changed.

Including his disrespectful ass disposition. 

A broad smile appears on the bearded face of the man who just doesn’t know today is the absolute wrong day to try to surprise Roman. To surprise a man who hates surprises in the first damn place. 

“Good to see you too, capo.”

There is nothing good about this. Roman already has seven million other things on his plate. He doesn’t need anything else thrown at him.

Especially this.

“Why are you here?” If there was anyone to come and pop up from the Cosa Nostra, he would have bet any money it would be Dwayne. And that would be a much better option than the bastard before him.

The woman on the desk chuckles. Roman can at least acknowledge her beauty. Breathtaking. Her features are almost too perfect to be real, her deep complexion free of any markings. A fine woman. Not Solana. Not in the slightest but still beautiful. She looks over at her co-intruder and speaks in Italian. “While the resemblance, physically, is undeniable. Personality wise is where it stops. Thank God. His bedside manners leave a lot to be desired.”

If she wasn’t a woman, Roman would have her laid out by now. To speak ill of him is one thing, but to do it in front of him is entirely different. Truth be told, if he wasn't already having a shitty day, a small part of him might be impressed at her balls. But, it’s not a good day. Far from it, so now he has to push back thoughts of murder.

Glare focused on her, he switches to Italian. “You have 1 minute to get the fuck out of my office, or else the only way you’ll be leaving is in a body bag.”

“Careful, Roman.” Matteo’s voice is light and surface level calm, but Roman knows better than that. Knows that it’s also a warning. If only he cared. “This is my wife.” 

“What makes you think I give a fuck?” Is Roman’s leveled reply. “I want her gone. Now.” Roman can’t decipher why this man would bring her in the first place. This doesn’t concern her. 

Matteo is smart, whispering something to long legs as she kisses his cheek and plops off the desk. Her smirk pisses him the fuck off as she walks past him, completely unbothered, remaining silent even as the door closes behind her.

Smug ass, prissy bitch. 

Roman doesn’t waste any time jumping back to the topic at hand. “Answer my question. Why are you here?”

Matteo sighs and sits forward, shaking his head. “Some things never change, huh?” Roman is just about to lose his shit at having to repeat himself when Matteo smartens up. “Dwayne sent me.”

Roman eyes him. “What?”

Matteo sighs, shrugging and rolling his shoulders. Roman’s mind quickly travels back to his last conversation with his cousin just a few weeks ago. Outside of the usual asking when he’ll fly out to Italy, he gave no indication that something was wrong. 

And yet Matteo, who Roman hasn’t seen in years, who is second to only Dwayne and lives in Italy full time, sits before him saying he was sent. 

“It’s as Dwayne has been telling you. The Administration grows restless of a leader who lives in a completely different continent.” 

This is nothing Roman hasn’t heard before a million times, but each time, his already limited patience continues to wane. “Is the business not successful?”

That’s an easy answer. “It is.”

Well then. “So why the fuck am I needed there?”

“Because they’ll do and find anything they can to delegitimize your reign.” A sort of frown falls on his face as he adds in a lowered voice. “To create a case.” 

Roman’s gaze narrows, his nose snarling as he catches on to what’s being shared. “They want you to clock me?”

Matteo nods, asking, “you remember our cugino, Luca?” Roman also nods, still trying to settle his anger that these bastards actually have the audacity to want him followed. “Well, he’s not that same scrawny punk anymore. He’s older, stronger, clever. Sadistic. They think he would be better suited to lead.”

It’s not that Roman cares, he’s just trying to get into Matteo’s head, see where his thoughts are. That’s the only reason he asks, “do you?”

Matteo doesn’t appear to think about his answer, which Roman finds a bit surprising. It’s almost as if he’s being honest. “No. Not at all. He doesn’t have the strategic mind to be capo. He leads with his emotions. Is irrational and strong headed. Even more hot headed than you are. He’ll run the business into the ground.”

It’s been years since Roman has spoken or interacted with his cousin, but the description provided seems aligned with everything he’d already pegged. Luca isn’t fit for this role. The weight that comes with being the boss. 

He would most definitely ruin the empire.

“How long are you here for?” 

“Not sure.” Matteo shrugs, running his hand through his hair. “That’s why I brought the wife and kids.”

The wife thing briefly took Roman off guard, but the kids thing especially surprises him. Not that Matteo is even remotely close to being someone he’s close with, it still stuns him a bit. Then again, most men around their age have a family of some sort by this point. So, it really shouldn’t be that much of a shock.

Matteo must catch on to Roman’s expression. “Three of them. Set of twin boys and a girl. Not exactly something I broadcast. Safety reasons and whatnot.” And that, Roman most definitely gets. Matteo looks down, an almost bitter scoff leaving his mouth. “We both know how they feel about us mixed breeds.”

Another thing they can relate on. In more than just the obvious way. Roman’s mother’s racist ass side of the family hated his father being Samoan but ‘accepted’ him, arranged the union solely because of who he was. Because of the Bloodline. But, Matteo’s Turkish father, an essential commoner, never stood a chance.

His mangled, tortured remains that were pulled from the bottom of a lake was an outcome that was always bound to come. 

Roman shakes his head. “And you wonder why the fuck I don’t want to be around any of them?”

Matteo chuckles darkly. “Not at all.” He grabs a paper weight on Roman’s desk and starts tossing it up and down. “You should be lucky it’s me here and not someone else. Dwayne had to fight tooth and nail for them to select me to spy on you. As I’m sure you already know, yet probably don’t care about, there aren’t many on the Administration who are exactly…..fans of yours.”

“And they never will be.” 

Matteo lifts his chin, calmly adding. “Of either of us.”

Silence. 

It’s not uncomfortable. Not comfortable either. Just….silent.

Until Matteo places the paper weight back down and stands up, slowly walking over to Roman. 

“Roman…..” Right away, the Tribal Chief knows he’s not about to like wherever this conversation is going. “I know….I know we’re not close for a lot reasons, but that doesn’t negate the fact that we are brothers—”

Yeah…..as always, he was right. 

He doesn’t like this shit at all. 

“We are nothing,” Roman snaps, practically growling, Matteo managing to tap into such deep rooted insecurities and so carefully tucked away traumas. “Sharing the same mother makes us biological siblings, but it does not make us brothers.” 

For the briefest second, there’s something that flashes in Matteo’s brown eyes. Something akin to hurt. But, it’s quickly pushed away, shoved to the back of the bus. He lifts his head and instead takes a step closer. 

“Whether you believe me or not, Roman. My loyalty is to you. You are the rightful capo. The Capo di tutti capi, and I will fight for and with you to the death.”

Roman says nothing, because he has nothing to say. Nothing he wants to say, at least. The statement lays heavy, joining the other pile of weights that have seemed to settle and make themselves comfortable in his head.

And his heart.

Matteo extends a hand, placing it on Roman’s shoulder, giving an almost comforting squeeze.

“You are mio fratello.” The word being repeated, however, is enough to make the Tribal Chief ready to resort to violence when Matteo, wisely steps back. “As I’m sure you’ve figured, while I’m here, I will need to be present for any and all meetings or discussions regarding the Cosa Nostra.”

Yes, Roman’s not a dumbass. Of course he has to. He needs something to report back to those bitches. It’s just how much of the actual truth will get relayed that he’s unsure about.

Roman continues to stand there, anger and twenty different other emotions boiling as the older man walks toward the door, readying to leave, but not without one final departing statement. 

“See you tomorrow, brother.”

—-------

“Is it true he’s packing an almost 10inch dick?”

Solana nearly chokes on the water she was in the midst of downing at the most unexpected, wild, flabbergasting question she’s almost ever received. 

And her expression of complete and utter shock is shared with the other two women who sit with her. 

Cam is the first to speak though, instantly chiding the other woman, “Mickie!”

“What?” Mickie, however, doesn’t seem to see the issue. Pulling one leg up on the sofa, she shakes the bottle of nail polish and starts applying the pretty lilac color. “Remember my ex-friend Layla? She fucked him one time and said it was the biggest one she ever had. That he could barely fit it in.”

“Mickie, for the love of God, shut up.” Melina cuts in, her voice less shocked and more irritated. She motions to Solana with her free hand, the other one in Solana’s lap as she designs the butterflies for her. “That’s her husband.”

“Well, she has to know he’s a hoe. Or used to be?” 

Cameron shakes her head, finishing up her own nail polish application to her short nails. “Seriously, Mickie, you’re out of line.” 

“It’s okay.” Solana finally decides to make her two cents known as she caps the bottle and places it back on the sofa beside her. “I—I know he….he had a reputation.” That seems like the nicest way to say it, the nicest way to acknowledge that her husband has probably slept with more women than she’d like to ever know. 

“That wasn’t an answer tho—ow!” Mickie winces when Melina punches her in the arm. “Bitch.”

Melina just chuckles, focus back on Solana as she jokes. “You see why we’re all here?”

It makes Solana smile.

To anyone else, the scene would be quite difficult to fully understand. Four young women chatting and joking amongst each other like they’re not all currently admitted and receiving treatment at a residential facility for women. They should be sad, moping, disconnected, unstable. And they have been all of those things, hence their current placement.

But, they’re also so much more than that. They’re human beings who hurt and feel like everyone else. They’ve just been hurt a lot more than some other people and have not responded or processed or even healed just yet. 

Emphasis on yet. Another thing Solana has picked up in therapy. 

“Did you guys do your assignment for Lilian?” Solana asks, partially wanting to redirect the focus from off herself and Roman’s…..anatomy, but also genuinely curious about their experiences completing the homework provided in group therapy.

Cam is the first to answer, shaking her head. “Yeah. It was…..not the best time.”

“Agreed,” Mickie chimes, shrugging her shoulders. “I mean, I tried to not be too depressing but ….considering I’ve tried to, as the kids say, unalive myself three times now, there wasn’t a lot to go off of.”

Solana winces. This is something she’s still getting a bit used to, if she ever fully will. How sometimes dark humor is so easily weaved into conversations. She’s seen and realized it’s a type of coping mechanism, but it’s still a bit difficult, nonetheless. 

The assignment being discussed consisted of the ladies being tasked with coming up with at least 10 chapter titles to represent their lives. Five from the past and five for the future they hope to have. Solana can agree that the ones for the past were a bit challenging and definitely sad, but her future ones managed to feed that hope she’s determined to not lose this time around.

“I kind of cheated and used song titles for some of them,” Melina admits with a chuckle.

“I used songs for all of them,” Cam counters with a small, sly smile. Of the three women, Solana seems to relate closely to her. They’re the same age and have the same quiet disposition that’s only shed away ever so slightly once they become more comfortable.

Which, clearly, has already started to happen.

“Have ya’ll ever heard Mama’s Hand by Queen Naija?” Almost everyone says no or shakes their head to signify no being their answer. Melina goes on to explain, “it’s this really pretty song she wrote about her son. I used some of the lyrics for my titles for my son.”

Solana, who was just about to switch to a different skin marker to start on the next butterfly, pauses. “You have a son?”

Yes, they’ve all grown rather close over the past few weeks, starting with their simultaneous hospital stays to where they all now room only doors down from each other in residential treatment. However, Melina having a child is news to Solana.

She nods and pulls the arm back that Solana was drawing on to reach in her back pocket, pulling out a folded photo. Considering Melina only reaches it to her, Solana takes a guess that Mickie and Cam already knew. Makes sense.

A smile naturally falls on her face at the sight of the curly haired little boy playing in the sand. 

Melina also smiles, though hers is clearly weighed down with sadness. “I took that just two months ago. We went to Isla Mujeres to go visit Santos aunt. She lives down there.” 

“He’s beautiful, Melina. What’s his name?” The mention of the island also captures Solana’s attention. “Roman and I were just there not too long ago, actually. He took me for my birthday.”

“Santos. Go figure.” She rolls her eyes, as Solana giggles. She thinks it’s actually cute he was named after his father. “And really? It’s so beautiful.”

Breathtaking. “It is.”

“Thank you.” Melina’s smile deepens as she takes the photo and tucks it back into her pocket. “We had a good time there. It almost feels too nice to be unreal, huh?”

Solana nods. “My mom used to tell me about it all the time, which is why Roman took us. He bought us a house there, so we can go back and visit.”

“Damn, what’s it like being married to someone so rich?” Mickie almost moans, head thrown back for a second before she gasps. “Could we do like a girls trip there or something? You know, assuming we don’t all get locked up again on grippy sock trips for trying to kill ourselves.” 

Cam rolls her eyes but admits, “outside of the suicide joke, that does sound kind of fun.”

“We can stay at your house,” Mickie suggests to Solana. “If Roman is okay with that, of course.”

Solana thinks about it. Something tells her he wouldn’t protest. Not if she really wanted it. He’d probably stay somewhere else, not wanting to be around a bunch of women, but she can’t see him saying no. Matter of fact, it kind of aligns with the idea she had brought up to Roman before the incident. An idea of a girls trip with Naomi and Bayley, who she still needs to talk to actually. 

She hasn’t interacted with them since that night. And not for any reason other than wanting to make sure she’s emotionally ready for that, no doubt, heavy ass conversation.

There will definitely be a lot of tears.

“I could talk to him,” she finally answers, looking over at Melina. And she will. It could actually be really nice having all of her now friends together for a nice getaway trip. “You should bring your son too.” 

Melina looks surprised by this. “Really?” She then looks down, chuckling sadly. “That’s if Santos trusts me enough.”

Given that their rooms are right next to each other, both here and at the hospital, Solana has found herself talking with and to Melina more than Mickie and even Cam. Melina is also Mexican, fluent in Spanish, which allows them to sometimes converse in the language only the two of them understand. But, in some of those conversations, they’ve gotten deep, which is why she’s slightly surprised this is the first time she’s hearing about a child.

Melina had disclosed a lot of her relationship with Santos Escobar. How they’ve known each since they were kids, shared some of their best and worst moments with each other, how he’s loved her through it all. 

Solana can still remember the heartbreaking look in her teary eyes as she shared, ‘he just wants me to love myself as much as he loves me’. And Solana related to that so deeply. It made her think of Roman and how he could never love her back most likely but how the way he cares about her and takes care of her probably feels just as good.

She knows what it’s like to be with someone who thinks the world of you when you can barely find reasons to justify as to why you even exist. 

They relate a lot in that regard. 

It’s why Solana reaches a comforting hand and places it over Melina’s hand, voice soft but sure. “You’re gonna get better, Melina.” She looks over to Cam and Mickie. “We all are.”

There’s a comfortable silence among the group that is welcomed and moving. A silent agreement between women who were once strangers and now friends. Sisters, even.

Mickie caps the bottle of nail polish and carefully places her foot back on the ground while reaching for Solana’s water bottle, lifting it up as if giving a toast. “To mental stability and finding rich men with big dicks to spend the rest of our lives with!”

“Mickie!”

—-----------

“You’re quiet tonight.”

Solana’s soft voice manages to snatch Roman away from that sunken place in his head where he’s sat deep in his thoughts for a variety of reasons, largely all due to the unexpected things that have been thrown at him.

He’d tried his best to put all of that into his visit to Asylum where he continues to extract his gruesome vengeance against her family and rapists. And it did help. A little, but clearly not enough where he’s able to hide the fact that he has a lot on his mind. 

“Come here.” Roman motions her over from where he sits propped up in the middle of her bed and she stands at the edge of the bed, notebook in hand. He watches the almost nervous way she places the book down on the bed and climbs over to him, Roman helping her straddle him. Kissing her exposed shoulder, he murmurs an apology into her soft skin. “I’m sorry.”

His eyes shut when she moves her hand to his hair, fingers almost massaging his scalp. “You want—do you want to talk about it?”

He can’t help but chuckle. The irony. “Isn’t that a bit counterproductive?”

She shakes her head, continuing to provide him soothing relief like nothing else can. “No. I—I told you before, you can talk to me too.”

It’s strange. If the situation was different, if he wasn’t still cautious regarding her mental health and the state of it, he might….he might take her up on it.

The Matteo situation though…..it’s complicated and layered and messy, and she doesn’t need any of that.

“I know.” Roman moves his hands to her hips. “But, I’m fine. Just a long ass day.”

Her eyes light with something. “Wasn’t your appointment today?” Shit. “How did it go? How’s your shoulder? What did he say about your blood pressure?”

Roman hates lying to Solana. He really does. She’s probably the only person in his life he’d prefer to not keep secrets from. She doesn’t deserve that. She’s been through more than enough shit to not deserve it.

But this…..he has to lie. 

Roman can’t think of one good thing that’ll come from telling her the truth. Solana seems to be doing well at this place, gradually improving day by day. Laying this on her will only hinder that progress and make her freak the fuck out. He doesn’t want that for her. 

He refuses to contribute to any type of regression.

Thus leaving him with only one option.

“It was fine, Sol.” To lie. “Shoulder’s practically healed. Numbers were fine. I’m good.”

That last part isn’t a lie, because Roman is determined this time around to actually do what Michaels said. To take his medication as he’s supposed to. 

For Solana.

He owes her that much.

She sighs, clearly and visibly relieved. “Good.” Roman feels like shit lying to her, but it’s for her own good. “C–can I show you something then?”

“You can show me anything, Sol.” Anything to take them off this damn topic is more than welcomed. 

He’s also reassured by the relieved smile on her face as she reaches back for her notebook, opening it, clearly looking for a certain page while talking. “One of the things I’ve been working on in therapy is goals. Like….setting goals for myself that are attainable and doable.”

“Okay.” Roman doesn't really know where she’s going, but right off the bat, whatever she needs might as well already be done. He’ll make it happen. 

“I…..” She trails off, biting down on her bottom lip, most likely trying to figure out how to say it. “I made a list of things I want to do when I get home. Some….some sooner, and some later.” Handing him the notebook, he starts reading off her neat handwriting, slightly taken back by the first thing on the list. 

Get back into training 

“Solana…..”

Roman is not opposed to Solana continuing to train. He thinks she should. Believes it’s been good for her. He just doesn’t know how to feel about the fact that it’s the number one thing on her list. Her mental strength, in his mind, should be the priority. 

She must detect and pick up on his hesitancy, eyes traveling to meet his. “He tried to take my life, Roman.” She cuts him off, her voice much lower and quieter than before. “In….in more than one way.” Roman can tell there’s another story there, but he won’t push it. Just keep it in mind the next time he’s hacking into her piece of shit father’s body. “He told me that because—because he wanted to break me, but I won’t—” She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath. “He didn’t. I’m not going to let him take away all the progress I’ve made. I know I—I regressed, but I am going to get better. I am better.” 

He respects that. Respects her so immensely. It hasn’t been the easiest thing for Roman to see her go up and down as much as she has over the past month. She’s had her highs and her lows, the lows being so much heavier than most people’s. 

And that’s just been for him. He can’t imagine how it’s been for her having to actually deal with all these things.

So, while a part of him wants her to just focus on her mental health, if she truly believes getting back into training will help aid that. He’ll support it. 

“Okay.”

She smiles, adding on, “did you—did you find a man for me to train with?” He did. In fact. He just hadn’t thought she’d want to jump right back into that either. “Also, I—I wanna learn how you do that thing you do.”

It’s the way she words it, the almost nervousness in her voice that makes him smile a bit. “Thing?”

She nods, shifting a bit on top of him. “You did it at WarGames. When you like…..ram into people. You knocked out whoever that was unconscious with one hit.”

It’s the added sentence that makes him realize what she’s referring to. “A spear?” And Solana nodding only widens his smile. Her innocence at the whole thing is adorable. “Baby, who you trying to spear?”

She shrugs, pushing some of hair back, cheeks reddening. “I don’t know. It just….it just seems effective.”

“It is.” When done correctly and done with proper training. It’d take her a while to get there, but if it’s what she wants, he’ll support it. “If you really want to learn though, I’ll teach you.”

Her smile is genuine and appreciative. Roman stealing a second to take it in, take in her happiness in this moment before moving onto the next one.

Host welcome home party 

At this second goal, Roman frowns, emitting a giggle from Solana. He looks up at her, clarifying, “does this mean you want people at the house?”

She playfully rolls her eyes. “Yes, Ro, I do.”

It was going so well. Training. He could get with. A bunch of people at his house though? Hell no. “Who exactly do you want to invite?”

“Jimmy, Jey, Naomi, Bayley, Melina—”

“Who the hell is Melina?” So far, there’s not a person listed that he’s in agreement with. “Baby, you know I hate people—”

“I know, but…..” She moves her hand to the bottom of his shirt, crumpling it while trying to plead her case. “They’re our friends….our….our family, and that….that means a lot to me.” Fuck. She’s too good at that shit. Tugging at his heartstrings. “Gail has been teaching me a lot about trauma and how it works. How connection is the way to heal. And that….that makes sense because you have been the biggest part of my healing, my connection with you, my—my love for you.”

Roman closes his eyes. Of course. Of course she would drop that word on him. The love word. The word that he can never voice to her and about her but feels with everything in him.

Taking in her heartfelt words, he nods, slowly. “Okay. Just…tell me when you want to do it and what you need. We’ll make it happen.” Thinking about something else, something important, he stipulates. “Jey’s not bringing them bad ass kids though. Or Nicki.” 

Solana rolls her eyes again. “Ro…..”

“Solana, I’m not about to have those failed Plan B’s destroy our house. And Nicki is a fucking arsonist. She’ll burn the place down.”

His wife pouting almost as she crosses her arms would make Roman chuckle if not for the fact he’s thinking about the last time Jey brought all his mistakes over to the property. Those little assholes caused over $50,000 in damages. Sure, it was of no financial consequence to him, but it was annoying as fuck to have to have people in his house doing the repairs. 

But, of course, his sweet saint of a wife lives up to her reputation. “Roman, that’s mean. They’re just….they’re just kids.”

“No, they’re vermin.” And he means that with everything in him. But, the minute Solana leans over and lays her head on his shoulder, a soft, desperate ‘please?’ leaving her mouth, it’s a wrap.

Damn her persuasiveness.

Or maybe it’s just his lack of resolve that seems to disappear when it comes to her.

Sighing against her, he mutters, “you know I can’t say no to you.”

Solana giggles, hugging and kissing him on his cheek. Meanwhile, Roman makes a mental note to have a shit ton of them kid leashes and fire hydrants ordered ASAP. 

Roman grunts as Solana murmurs a ‘thank you,’ and he moves onto the next one.

Get tattoos

This shifts the conversation a bit as he asks, “really?”

Nodding, she gestures to her inner right forearm where the colorful butterflies remain. Something she seems determined and focused to keep up. “I want to get the Hummingbird. For my mom.” She ghosts her fingers over her truly impressive artwork. “Butterflies. And….a semicolon.” Roman is grateful when she explains the last one on her own volition. “It’s….it’s for people who’ve survived depression and trauma and….and suicide.” She swallows, adding. “Something comes after a semicolon just like something comes after our darkness.” And before Roman can even comment on that, voice his agreement, she continues. “I want a lotus too. That’s for….for sexual assault.” 

She doesn’t say anything beyond that, and he doesn’t push it. Just brings her hand to his mouth, kissing her palm. “Just tell me when.” He’ll reach out to his tattoo artist and get her scheduled the same day if that’s what she wants. Whatever she needs. 

Solana smiles, licking her lips. “I—I want one for you too. I just—haven’t figured out what exactly.” 

She’s just full of surprises tonight. He understands all of the desired tattoos that she’s listed thus far. They all have such deep, profound meanings, so for him to be included in that list feels almost wrong. For her to want to put something permanent on her body for him seems wrong. “Solana, you don’t—”

“But, I want to.” 

He doesn’t know how to feel about that. Everything else she described was fine and made sense, but this one is a struggle for him. Regardless, he doesn’t push it further. Doesn’t question her.

He just continues to read through the list, the rest, for the most part, presenting no major issue. Things like continuing to work on her confidence, going back to Isla Mujeres, taking up pole dancing (he definitely wants the backstory on that as well as see if it can be moved up the list), moving all of her journals and books into the home library, etc.

However, Roman is a bit confused when he reaches the last numbered item that’s written in Spanish. She knows he doesn’t speak or understand practically any of it.

10) un bebe o una bebe

His confusion is evident, and it grows slightly when Solana almost gently takes the notebook from him and carefully places it on the bed beside them. She swallows, eyes focused on him as she moves her arms around his neck. “Roman…..I….”

Seeing her trepidation, he moves his hands to her hips, holding her. “Solana, talk to me.”

The reassurance seems to help, as she nods and blows out a deep breath. “Just…..promise me you’ll think about it before you give me an answer?”

This, however, doesn’t help him much. It only makes his curiosity grow at just what she’s talking about. Still, he won’t deny her request. “Okay.”

She moves even closer, gaze falling down to her lap. “When…..when I get better and….and more stable, I—” She lifts her eyes, voice steady and soft. “I want to have a baby, Roman.” Fuck. “I want us to have a baby. I—I want to be a mom.”

Of all the things to come out of her mouth this evening, some more than surprising, this has to take the cake. It’s the last thing he expected to hear her say.

Ever.

“Solana….”

“We have to make an heir anyway. I know….I know you’ve been taking care of that for us, but—but we can’t take forever, and—I’m ready. I know I need to focus on my mental health, and I am. I will, but…..Roman, I really want to have a baby with you.” She adds on, almost desperate and needing him to have all of the information so he can make the best decision. “And I talked to Dr. Stratus. She said all of my medications are safe to take while pregnant. We might have to change something if I decide to breastfeed, but she said that won’t be a huge issue either.”

Well, shit. Roman finds himself asking in a low voice. “You already talked to someone about this?”

She nods, almost nervously. “I just—I needed to know what she and Gail thought. If….if I’m stable enough for it.”

“What they say?”

She looks down, chuckling a bit, eyes watering. “They think I’d be a good mom.”

There’s something almost sad about the way she seems almost surprised by this. Like she didn’t think she’d be good at it until receiving their approval.

When, in actuality, he thinks she’d be the best damn mom a kid could ask for. But, she’d have to be…..with him as the father. 

Roman is not….he’s not built for that life. He doesn’t know or understand the first thing about kids other than they need and deserve all of the things he can’t and doesn’t know how to give. That’s why he’d have to lean so heavily on Solana, on her soft and gentle nature. And how would that be fair? To give her a child that she more or less would have to raise by herself because any overt involvement from him would probably increase the chances of the kid ending as fucked up as Roman is.

“You would, baby.” He finds himself agreeing, voice still low, gentle almost, even in the midst of such self-loathing thoughts. There’s so many things Solana is insecure and self-conscious about still, but this shouldn’t be one of them. “Amazing.”

The way her expression softens so deeply does something to him. “Really?” Her eyes watering is the icing on the cake as she grabs his hand, tracing the lines on his palm. “Y–you really mean that?”

He’s not sure he’s ever meant anything more. “Of course.”

Solana throws another curveball at him with the next soft admission to leave her mouth. “I think you’d be an amazing dad too.”

Fuck.

Keyword of the day it seems. 

Because just what in the hell is he supposed to do with that? How does he tell her that she’s wrong as hell? That someone like him really has no business being anyone’s father. That he’d just fuck up any kid of theirs. That despite recurrent dreams he’s been having about this, about fatherhood, that Roman in the dreams has to be someone else.

Can’t and could never be him. 

He’s good at a lot of things, maybe more than the average person, but that?

No.

Just…..no.

But what difference does all of this make when Solana is right about the fact that he has to have an heir. A child needs to be produced, whether he wants to or not, and this discussion is making him realize that while he’s spent his whole life feeling indifferent to fatherhood, the entrance of Solana, of having her be the mother to his kid, has thrown a wrench into everything. 

He doesn’t know what the fuck to think now. 

So, he expresses as such with as much carefulness as he can.

“I just…..I gotta think, Solana.” About more than just this. About everything. This day has been….a lot, to say the least.

“Of course.” She nods. And if she’s disappointed by his answer, she does a great job at not showing it. Roman welcomes her when she moves her body to lay on top of his, her face pressed against his chest. “I’m here whenever you’re ready to talk.”

It’s a statement that stays with Roman for the rest of his visit, oscillates in the back of his head as he sits in the middle of the SUV while being driven home.

Everything feels like it’s all been happening at once, almost too fast, like the speed is something he’s somehow unable to keep up with. Newfound territory for the man who’s always prided himself at always being so in control.

But, he’s not. 

He’s not in control of damn near all the things right now, his emotions, namely. And it’s fucking miserable. 

His love for Solana that he can’t act on because he doesn’t know what the fuck that would even mean.

Not being able to help her to the extent she needs and not being there for her when she needed him the most. Not being there to stop her the night she tried to kill herself.

Not telling her the truth about her father and leaving her to find out in the most traumatic way.

Now there’s the matter of his health, his blood pressure that he once thought was insignificant, now a moderate to major issue. 

Couple on the unexpected reintroduction of his mother’s firstborn re-entering his life.

And to top it all off, Solana wants to have a baby.

With him. 

Fucking hell.

It’s not until mentally listing all of these things that Roman becomes aware of a tightness in his chest, a sensation he hasn’t felt in years. Not since….not since his last panic attack.

Fuck.

Realizing what’s about to happen, Roman rolls down the tinted windows and uses the passing, speeding cars as the source of distraction. He picks the color red and starts counting how many he sees, and when that’s not enough, he switches to cars vs SUV’s, mentally listing those off. 

He continues to do that until that dastardly feeling entirely dissipates. But, it’s only when he rolls up the window that he punches the headrest in front of him.

This can’t happen again. Roman has too fucking much on his plate and stands to lose way too much. He can’t experience his own kind of regression. But, that’s exactly what’s happening. The thought of which allows him to acknowledge for the first time, in a long that, that he’s overwhelmed.

Roman feels overwhelmed. 

It’s just too fucking much. His head is cloudy as shit, and he needs to just get away from it all.

Grabbing his phone, he puts Rikishi, Jimmy, and Jey in a group text and types out a message. 

Roman: I’m going to see her this weekend. 

Less than two minutes later, the phone dings with a reply. 

Rikishi: I’ll make the arrangements.

Expecting that answer, he moves to the next part of his messages. 

Roman: Jimmy, I need you and Naomi to keep Dulce for me. I’m gonna put you and Jey down as emergency contacts if something happens with Solana while I’m gone. 

Roman: And if it’s not in regards to my wife, don’t fucking bother me.

Roman switches to his thread with Solana, uninterested in anything else anyone has to say right now. He just needs to communicate with Solana.

He can’t tell her the truth, of course, but he does need her to know he won’t be as readily available. 

She deserves that much.

Roman: A work situation came up, so I have to go out of town this weekend. I’m going to leave Dulce with Jimmy and Naomi. If you need anything, call me, and I’ll come back home.

Roman places his phone on the seat beside him and tilts his head back, running his hand over his face. 

Then his phone goes off.

Solana: Roman….

Solana: I’m okay. You don’t have to do that. I’m safe. I’m….I’m feeling happy again. Just focus on yourself. You have so much on your plate right now. I can tell. I wish you would talk to me, but I get it….

Solana: Just please take care of yourself. Be careful.

Roman reads over her texts at least three times, really honing in on the ‘I wish you would talk to me.”

He’s starting to wish he could too.

He really is.

Solana: I love you. ❤️

Another ding, and he swallows. It’s getting harder and harder to have her be so vulnerable with him and not be able to reciprocate that. It feels cruel to ignore her, to say nothing when she tells and gives him everything.

It’s why after going back and forth in his head for a good two minutes, he eventually says fuck it and sends out a simple but telling reply.

Roman: ❤️

[neiptune]

it’s valentine’s day, you clown

cw: 1.2k wc, blank blogs don't interact, something something your volleyball superstar boyfriend tooru flies home to surprise you only to pass out on your bed, this is my first ever hq fic and it's a complete coincidence that it's about him please be nice and don't make any assumptions

thank you @moondust-lore for reading this 🤍

His breathing stays regular and quiet as you crawl onto the mattress. Your bed is still somehow comically small and far from ideal to accomodate that unique ensemble of long limbs, sturdy muscles and swooping brown hair. Yet his sleep is serene, features relaxed that fill your chest with warmth that almost prompts your fingers to run through smooth locks. How have they not been rendered thicker or dry by the sea salt yet?

You’re careful as you snuggle closer to his broad back, not really wanting to wake him up. A small smile creeps onto your lips at the thought of how tired he must’ve been, couldn’t even bother to properly slip underneath the covers, knocked out in seconds. Flying all the way to Japan, travelling for almost 24 full hours to surprise someone must do that to a person.

The shock has worn out, the sensation of your heart being one second from bursting and exploding into a million golden confetti has dimmed. Now your head feels clear enough for your mind to be focusing on the important stuff, the mundane thoughts you didn’t have the luxury of dwelling on for months are a messy but colorful vortex. Would he like the usual for dinner? Does the uniform or any shirts need some ironing? Yes, yes, Tooru favors dry cleaners because they’re practical and he’s rich but you desperately want to contribute. You want proof that he’s home, actually home. With his big designer suitcases and wrinkled shirts and ridiculously expensive glasses and a smile that still shifts your world’s axis.

You allow yourself to scoot closer, until your nose brushes against his shoulder. He radiates a comforting  warmth and smells nice as always. Of sunscreen, beaches, the cologne you have bought for his birthday. As you shut your eyes, memories from the previous night start slowly blurring the edges of your consciousness and lull you to sleep.

“Shit! Fuck!” you jolt awake at the unexpected profanities, the last thing you remember dreaming about including tanned skin and a much more peaceful scenery made of rolling waves and golden, powdery sand.

“What… what’s wrong?!”

Oikawa Tooru is looking at your with what could be only defined as a glare. Eyes squinted, accusatory worry lines and all.

“You let me sleep? Why were you sleeping too instead of waking me up? It’s late!” his pitch gets higher with each word and by the end of the fully formed sentence you’re grimacing. The awfully old digital alarm clock on your nighstand flashes a red 11:05 PM.

“I’m sorry!” you panic “I didn’t mean to fall asleep! I know it’s late but I can probably put something together for dinner anyway? Are you that hungry? Wait, actually, let me get something delivered and…”

Now he’s staring with an openly outraged look on his pretty face, which makes you think finishing the thought probably isn’t the smartest idea.

“You… don’t want me to order in? I mean, fine, you can pick any local restaurant or takeaway, I don’t really ca-”

“Are you stupid?”

Ok, well. That feels unfair.

“I already apologized for falling asleep, no need to be a jerk” now you’re squinting your eyes at him. One eye. The other is being relentlessly rubbed.

“You’re right” he sighs and his massive shoulders slump, head hanging low like a wounded animal “it’s not your fault. I’m the dumb one. Couldn’t even set an alarm”

“I think you’re blowing this out of proportion, we can still eat something. If you’re worrying about your sleep schedule, I’m sure I can find some sleeping pills or…”

Oikawa looks at you, exasperated.

“That’s definitely not what I’m worried about”

“What the hell are you worried about, then?”

“It’s valentine’s day, you clown”

You blink back your surprise, his fond eye roll not easing the heat that takes over your face as realization finally dawns on you. “That’s… that’s why you flew here?”

Tooru leans forward to lightly flick your forehead. A car passes down the street, the light bleeding through your shades brightens the room for a moment and you catch the sincere amusement in his eyes.

“Yes, darling dearest. That’s exactly why I flew here. I was also supposed to make plans, take you out on a proper date, rob a flower shop from the inside out instead of passing out and drooling on your favorite duvet”

You stare back at his comical frown for a few seconds more before falling back into your pillows with a chuckle.

“Glad you think this is funny and not irredeemably gross. Stop giggling, let me think. I’m gonna go buy the most expensive champagne bottle and pick dandelions along the fucking sidewalk if I have to, and then-”

“Tooru”

“What?” he’s already swinging one leg over the edge of the bed “I’ll be quick”

“You’re here”

Oikawa snorts.

“Yes, I’m still here. Now, if you could kindly let go of my shirt…”

“I don’t want any of those things. You know I don’t want them”

He huffs and air comes out of his nose. “Yeah, I know. But I wanted it to be special” his tone is petulant but you recognize the real thing vibrating underneath, the genuine disappointment.

“It’s already special because you’re here. The only thing that could make it extra special is you filling this cold, empty spot next to me” you pat the covers with a lenient smile and Oikawa allows himself three seconds, three entire seconds to sulk and flash you those big, wet, sopping eyes with a pout that makes him less of a volleyball superstar and more of a kicked labrador puppy.

You welcome his painfully heavy body on top of yours, sharp angles and hard muscles that somehow melt perfectly in your embrace. He’s holding you so tight, head buried in the crook of your neck, soft hair tickling your cheek.

“I’m sorry” Tooru murmurs the apology quietly and seals it into your skin. You know he truly is, devastated as he always gets when something doesn’t go according to the plan. Always one for grandiose gestures and loud displays of affection, chasing whatever it takes to validate how he feels just in case the other person needs proof, always additional proof heaven forbid they feel neglected or get bored. His confidence wavering, his mind always running 100 miles an hour. Am I doing enough? Am I still enough?

“I love you” you reply for good measure and his arms tighten around your body.

But do I deserve it?

“Thank you for flying across the planet to get to me” you smile into his hair before kissing the side of his head “I missed you”

“I’d fly across the solar system to get to you” he’s smiling too, it’s in his voice.

“Corny” with a grin, you pinch his cheek until he looks up with an exaggerated, pained groan. But before he has the chance to protest, you take his disgustingly pretty face in your hands. 

“Wherever you fly from, I’ll be there to welcome you home”

Tooru smiles into the kiss, chases your lips when you relax back into the pillows.

And I’ll spend my life trying to deserve it.

Good thing he has at least five different Havanna Alfajores variety boxes somewhere in one of those suitcases. And two tickets to fly back to Argentina.

[lunarduty]

𝙒𝙄𝙎𝙃 𝙄 𝘿𝙄𝘿𝙉'𝙏 𝘾𝘼𝙍𝙀

☾ how the cod men act when they're jealous. 141 + ALEJANDRO + RUDY + GRAVES + FRANK X F!READER TAGS | female reader. WC | 1,449

☾ JOHN PRICE has always felt very secure in himself, his work, and the relationships with those he cares about - that extends to you tenfold. he’s not one to get into a relationship if he doesn’t feel like you won’t or can’t be faithful 100%. and that’s why he never truly gets jealous - because he knows you and he knows you love him and wouldn’t try to mess around. if some muppet tries hitting on you at the pub, he’ll only get involved because he doesn’t want you to feel uncomfortable.

but john isn’t completely immune from jealousy. while he never worries about some other bloke sweeping you off your feet, his jealousy comes through when he feels as if someone else is outshining him. john has a tendency to be distant, and even when he’s beginning to feel that distance, work can pull him even further away. so if he sees you getting your laughs or comfort from someone else, it kinda tugs at his heart. makes him wish he was doing it instead.

☾ GAZ never truly lets things get under his skin if he doesn’t deem them important enough to, and jealousy is one of those things. of course, he likes having all of your attention. but it’s hard to really feel threatened when he’s the one who brought you to the pub, arm over your shoulders, showing you off and giving lots of kisses and doesn’t really give a fuck who sees. cheeky as he is, kyle might even revel in the onlookers who start to feel jealous of him.

and if there’s anything to be jealous about, it’s the bottle that you hold so tightly in your hands and bring to those gorgeous lips. it’s toward the music itself for making you move so slowly and sexily. it’s at the liquor that plasters a grin on your face when gaz can usually do it himself. he does later, rest assured - makes dumb jokes to make you laugh while he runs your hands all over his body for you. and there’s nothing left to be jealous over.

☾ SOAP is a man who’s pretty in touch with his feelings. he knows when he starts feeling jealous, when it starts making him act up, and he always feels bad about it. there’s few people in the world soap trusts more than you - yet, he gets that hot, tight knot in his gut whenever he hears your laughter and he’s not the cause of it. when someone else seems to gain your attention more easily than he can. soap will push it down, try to act nonchalant, like it doesn’t bother him. but it does. other people pick up on it and that just makes it worse.

later on, when he finally gets you to himself, soap is talkative - more than usual. like if he keeps rambling about random topics, it’ll make up for lost time. at least in his mind. you eventually have to slow him down with a kiss, ask if everything is alright. you know soap better than he knows himself - of course you picked up on the shift in his mood. that simple fact helps soothe away the last lickings of jealousy. he still feels stupid about letting himself get like that.

☾ GHOST wouldn’t even realize he was jealous until someone else points it out. he’s usually gruff and stoic and glaring at people so his signs of jealous takes the form of not talking at all. and lots of staring. scowling is probably a better word for it - if looks can kill and all that. he internalizes his own behavior as simple concern over you, or something about the situation just not feeling right. he still memorizes the face of the guy who’s been chatting you up. sticks him all the way to the top of his shit list.

ghost doesn’t really interfere, not unless he feels like he has to (though, he’ll move around the goalposts of when the appropriate time is.) until then, he kinda just sulks by himself. not even soap can muster more than a couple words from him. and you can really feel his jealousy once he’s got you by his side again and he’s barely talking to you and glaring because he’s in a general shit mood. you ask him what’s wrong, and he says it’s nothing. it’s not until later, in private, when he reflects and feels like a total ass.

☾ ALEJANDRO is quite known for his hot temper, but when it comes to jealousy, he becomes more of an opportunist. instead of embarrassing you and himself by acting out on his jealousy, he’ll take the burning feeling and turn it into something useful. this means coming up to you, pulling you against his side, looking directly at the guy who’d been chatting you up, and really laying it on thick. kisses you, touches you, makes sly little comments. might kick it up a notch by saying some lowkey insults at the guy, knowing he wouldn’t do anything but alejandro kinda wishes he would.

he’ll act all innocent if you confront him about it. tell you he just likes showing you off because you’re too fucking cute and he loves you too much. but that act doesn’t hold up for very long because alejandro isn’t great at subtly. he ends up just insulting the guy even more to you by saying he was an idiot and didn’t deserve you and he kinda smelled anyway so why would you ever give him the time of day?

☾ RUDOLFO gets a bit of a Kicked Puppy Vibe whenever he’s jealous. he can be a sensitive person and feels the loss of your presence in his very soul. he really does try to ignore that ugly, twisted feeling inside him whenever the jealous gets especially potent. he wants to enjoy the night with the rest of los vaqueros, but rudy always seems to find you in the crowd. always frowns a little when he finds you enjoying the company of someone else a little too much. always stops himself from going and stealing your attention for himself.

but later on, his affection gets amped up to the max. rudy usually shines under your attention, and tonight is only worse. honestly gets a little clingy for the rest of the night, and seems to feel a little better when you blame it on the alcohol. of course, rudy knows himself well enough to know what he’s doing. feels a little embarrassed by it, so maybe some of his many kisses are his way of subtly apologizing for it.

☾ PHILLIP GRAVES does not get jealous at all. not at all. why should he care if some loser is making you laugh so hard at jokes that aren’t even funny? he only steps in because this guy is so wildly unfunny, and also kinda creepy, that graves is afraid you might just die of boredom. and as you know, phillip’s a heroic guy. as your boyfriend and commander, it’s his job to keep you safe from any and all threats big, or in this guy’s case, very small.

graves couldn’t hide his jealousy to save his own life. he likes to believe he’s smart and cunning and doesn’t let dumb shit get to him - and that’s true for a lot of things. but as soon as you gets you all to himself. he’s got this primal need to pull you close and remind you just who the fuck you belong to. he doesn’t think of it as proving himself, but the marks on your neck say otherwise…

☾ FRANK WOODS gets jealous more often than he’ll admit it. it’s going to be loud and it’s going to be obvious. and he’ll deny it - insist he isn’t the jealous type and he’s got more self-respect than all that. but he’s not nearly as subtle as he tries to be. it’s so easy to catch his gaze from across the room when someone happens to get a little too friendly. he’ll say over and over how he isn’t jealous, and in the same breath, stand between you and the dick talking to you and start throwing out insults.

even if you call him out on it later, frank doesn’t seem to care. in fact, he’ll look damn proud of himself. he’s always had this instinct to protect what’s his. always had this tendency for possessiveness. if he’s in a good mood, he’ll crack a dumb joke about the guy and move on. if not, he might think you were trying to make him jealous. but of course, that would mean admitting he was jealous in the first place.

[twilight-nephilim]

Do I wanna know ? || Blue Lock

Blue lock headcanons ! : Red flags + Arguments

Characters : Rin Itoshi, Sae Itoshi, Michael Kaiser & Alexis Ness (Separately)

Description: Their red flags in a relationship and how your arguments would look like

Word Count: 957

Warning/s: Arguments, All of them are assholes here, Mild swearing, Degradation, Emotional manipulation, Slight Abuse, Toxic Relationships, Kaiser, Most of this might be OOC

Note: This was originally supposed to be crack hcs but I thought it would be fun to make it serious 😭I am not romantacizing any of these red flags and if these things are happening in your irl relatioship please seek help

Rin Itoshi

After his brother left he started to act coldly to everyone else- including you.

As he would dedicate his entire life to football, it meant sometimes ignoring your needs,

Whether intentionally or unintentionally he would brush you off, leaving you to deal with things alone

Rin would be insensitive towards your feelings- saying things that would hurt you unknowingly

“You know… You didn’t need to say that…” You looked down at the ground as Rin just stared at you coldly, as if you were nothing. “Say what? That you aren’t important enough for me to care about? I talk to you almost everyday, isn’t that enough?” He said, his voice laced with venom. It hurt you, to say the least. Was it the way he said it so indifferently? Or was it the way he looked at you as if you were a nobody, someone who he just saw as a stepping stone to his goal. “Rin ! Can’t you just understand that you can’t just say that to me and expect me not to feel hurt from it?! Why do you treat me as just a ‘someone’ to you!? I’m your fucking girlfriend for god’s sake— can’t you understand that I need you to at least talk to me and act like you love me?!…”

Sae Itoshi

Similar to rin, he would act cold to you, but unlike rin he does it intentionally

Sae could ghost you for days and respond with a simple “k”

He doesn’t really realize that what he’s doing is a bad thing, and he refuses to accept his faults

Doesn’t trust you AT ALL but he himself lies or keeps things from you intentionally

“Sae… We need to talk” You looked at your boyfriend as he was laying on your bed, he turns to look at you with a bothered look. “What is it this time Y/n…” Sae groaned as he got his phone to do something. “Sae- listen, I know it’s kind of selfish for me to ask but… can you try to make time for me… You never really talk to me that much anymore…” You mumbled, but it was loud enough for Sae to hear you. “Am I not good enough for you?” He asked rhetorically with an annoyed look on his face. “No- That’s not what I meant-“ You shrieked as Sae suddenly stood up and walked up to you and grabs your wrist. “Then stop being selfish. I’m here aren’t I? I took a trip away from Spain to see you, can’t you just be thankful that I’m spending my time with someone as worthless as you?”

Michael Kaiser

Michael is a really complex character to say the least,

He can manipulate you into doing things that would benefit him under the guise of “making him happy”

Forces you to be more dependent on him so you feel more obligated to do what he wants

Sae 2.0 but worse

Puts himself above you, seeing you as just a emotional support when he’s upset

Expects you to be there for him whenever he’s angry or distressed, but doesn’t do the same for you because he thinks he’s more important than you.

Has MAJOR attachment issues and even if things got extremely toxic you couldn’t leave. He either guilts you into staying or you just come back to him.

You walked up to Kaiser after one of his matches, “Michael… I don’t know if it’s the right time, but can we talk?” Kaiser looked at your serious face with his usual playful look. “What is it, mein liebling? I don’t have all day” He said with a playful yet degrading tone. “I… I wanna break up, this isn’t working out. I just feel exhausted—“ You were cut off as Kaiser grabbed your wrist, his nails digging into your skin. “If you think you can leave me just like that, then you're fucking stupid” He pushed you down on the ground as he moved his hand to grab your hair, “I'm the only who would ever love your pathetic ass; you're worthless without me, so don't even try to leave me. Understood?”

Alexis Ness

Ness gets jealous easily. Seeing how he acts around kaiser, it’s not too far fetched to think he would act the same around his partner.

He doesn’t let you go out alone because he’s afraid that you would leave him for someone else.

Overprotective in a bad way

He gets picky over what you wear because it will attract attention and someone might ‘steal’ you from him

Will get into fights with you over kaiser

Guilt tripper pt. 2

“No. You will not go out tonight.” Ness said as he stared at you from the hallway, “Why not? I'm just gonna go out with my friend, and it's a mall ‘Lexis, It's not like I'm gonna leave you…” You explained but he ignored you and walked to the door, effectively stopping you from leaving. “Y/n… Why can’t you just listen to me!? You’re always picking someone over me, do you even love me anymore!?” Ness started crying, in shock you instinctively hugged him, as an attempt to comfort. “No wait— That’s not what I meant ‘Lexis, of course I love you. Please… don’t cry over me… I won’t leave anymore, I’ll stay.” You said as you tried to comfort Ness, you failed to notice the smirk he held.

[calaisreno]

Couple

865 words / Prompt: Imperfect

“We’re not—” John begins, but realises the futility of saying it again. 

“You’re a lucky man.” Hopkins winks at him. “I’d make a play for him myself, but he’s obviously taken.”

He watches her walk away while he stands at the bar, waiting for another pint. She’s just the kind of woman he once would have hit on. A fun flirtation. 

Now he doesn’t have the energy. And he’s wondering when that happened.

Sherlock is watching him. 

He should be used to it by now. People always assume they’re a couple, and really, he doesn’t mind so much. He’s stopped saying he’s not gay because it’s misleading, and he would rather be honest. But it’s nobody’s fucking business who he is.

Sherlock must know. God, they’ve known each other for years, lived together for months now, since he and Rosie moved back. They’re practically co-parenting, and often exchange the same weary look that only the parents of a toddler can wear. 

But Sherlock looks sad, he thinks. If John is honest with himself, he’s a bit worried that Sherlock is tired of the John-and-Rosie show, the trail of destruction Rosie leaves everywhere she toddles. The cases always used to bring them together, and now, even if they have a babysitter, John’s often too exhausted to go out with him. 

Even this, a night out with the Yarders, Rosie at home with Mrs Hudson, is less fun than John had hoped. Sherlock doesn’t care for pub nights, but he tags along because John presses him to be more social. 

He moves towards Sherlock, who’s sitting on the periphery of the noisy group. People don’t socialise with him much. Even the women who look at him with appreciation give up after a brief exchange. Sherlock can manage social occasions when necessary, but he’s clearly wishing he were somewhere else.

He slides into the seat opposite. “I’m glad you came.” 

“Why?” Sherlock gives him a sharp look. “So I could watch Lestrade’s team get pissed?”

“No, I’m glad because… I like being with you.”

Sherlock’s eyebrows rise. He gives an amused huff. “You live with me.”

“Yeah, I do. But at home there’s always some mess to clean up or Rosie to deal with. I’m sorry, I know this isn’t your favourite thing.”

“I don’t mind.” His mouth curves into a smile. “I like being with you, too.” 

John nods, takes a swallow of beer. “Stella was just making the usual assumption. We look like a couple. And I was wondering, are we?”

“Are we a couple?” Sherlock’s face does something complicated: surprise, discomfort, and then careful indifference. “People are idiots.”

“I don’t care about people. I care about you. Does it bother you?”

“Why would it bother me?”

“Because you don’t… I know you care about me and Rosie, but you don’t do…” The word is on the tip of John’s tongue, but he’s looking into Sherlock’s eyes, feeling completely obvious.

“Romance,” Sherlock says. “It’s a medieval construct, John, an idealisation of a reality that is often messy and contentious. People fall in love and marry; they run headlong into disappointment and divorce. I abhor the idea that we must put on blinders and pretend everything is perfect. It’s not, and never has been.”

John feels his heart sink a bit. “Yeah, you’re right.” He touches the side of his pint glass, watches the condensation run down. 

He’s thinking about his own failed marriage. He’d loved the idea of Mary, an escape from the past, the possibility of a future with a person who loved him. He’d built an idealised life in his head, and it hadn’t taken long for him to realise how mistaken he’d been. The night Mary died, he’d planned to talk with her, tell her what he’d realised about himself. He didn’t know where that would take them, but it had to be said. He’d only delayed because of Sherlock’s text.

“Love,” Sherlock continues, “has nothing to do with romance. It’s not perfect. It’s a decision, one we keep making because it’s important.”

Their eyes meet. John is looking up into Sherlock’s face, remembering when he said, we might all just be human. “Important. To you?”

“Yes.”

The group is suddenly louder, laughing and jeering at some remark. No one is looking at him and Sherlock. 

Those grey eyes are still gazing at him.

“Love is important, John. I know I don’t often express sentiment, but I do feel it. I do love you.”

At the look on John’s face, Sherlock’s smile turns to something sadder. 

“I adore you and Rosie, and I love the messiness of living with you. I don’t want a perfect life. I want you. I want us.”

“So, you’re saying… you want us... to be a couple?”

“We already are, John. What that means is up to us. Do you want more than what we have?”

“God, yes.” The words are out of his mouth before he thinks them. “I do. Want you. If you…?”

“Yes.” Sherlock is smiling now, a full, bright smile that practically lights up the room. 

John leans closer. “I love you too, Sherlock.” 

The kiss is messy and imperfect. And glorious. Nobody’s watching.

[jujutsukgojo]

The Baby Project Chapter 4

Izuku Midoriya x reader

Chapter One, chapter two, chapter three,

Summary: The Sports Festival is here! Unfortunately, so is the principal. tw: angst, violence, fluff, neglect(?), stress, hate, anxiety(?)

 “Alright, alright, number six, seven, and-oh now this isn’t cute at all. Six, seven, eight, nine, ten? So lame.” The table laughs and urges you to. “It’s a good one!” 

“It’s stupid. Here.” You begin to lay out the dishes in front of them. The back of Noa’s head lays on your chest. You’re careful not to hurt him.

 “You’re doing great, love. It’s okay!” 

  You thank them and when you have successfully managed to lay them out without bothering the baby, they clap gently. “Thank you, thank you.” You wave the circular tray and head back to the counter. 

  “Honey love, I was thinking,” Ken appears through the window. The spatula that was in his hand is placed beside him. “How about you stay behind the counter? Let Yona take on the waiting.” 

  “Ken…” He puts the towel down that was on his broad shoulder. His messy black hair is put in a half bun today. He still needs a haircut though. 

“I’m serious. It’d be better to do that than jeopardize him and more importantly, yourself. You could get hurt.” You don’t see how, but the father in Ken apparently can.

  “My tips, Ken.” He sighs. “I’ll work on that, okay? Stay behind the counter. You look cute like that.”

“Pfft!” You laugh and unsurprisingly, so does Noa. He’s been doing that a lot lately. Ken smiles at you and Noa. “Yo, Yona! Switch with her!” Ken yells.

  “Boo!” 

“Shut up, Aoi!” Aoi Sato huffs at Ken and crosses his arms in protest. Yona comes close to the two of you. “Fine, fine, she can take it. Her and Noa’ll be good for business anyway. A pretty girl and a cute baby at the counter may draw people in.”

You snort and the bell above the door rings. “Welc-oh my God.” He comes in and stands there wide eyed. In his hand is an All Might wallet and his body has various mechanical devices. On both of his wrists, around his hips to look like a belt. His shoes are clunky and the red fabric peaks through in some spots. Other than that, it looks like a steel toed heavyweight shoe. 

 Your mouth drops and your heart stops.

Fucking Deku.

  And Noa, the little brat, giggles and reaches for him while saying his first word: papa.

-

The two of you sit down with Noa in a wooden highchair. The tension is palpable as the two of you stare at each other. Even though this doesn’t involve him, you feel guilty. Like you lied to him personally even though he doesn’t really know you. Yes, he has helped with Noa and has even gained claim to Noa’s milestone of his first word. However, you don’t know each other. 

  “You gonna snitch?” Your eyes focus on him. He shifts in his seat and tilts his head to get a good look at you. “This is against the rules. Can I know why you’re doing this?” 

  “I’m broke.” His green eyes soften. “I get that. I have a friend whose finances aren’t the best so I can understand to that degree.”

  Good.

“But this is against the rules. Do you think you’re going to get away with it?” you take a deep breath. “I will if you keep your mouth shut. This isn’t for fun. This is important to me.”

  “I’m just saying. Lying is wrong, it’s better in the long run to be honest. Maybe U.A. will understand. It’s better to let them know now than it is to let it spring up on them.”

“This is from the man who can do anything. Didn't you lie to literally everyone?” If he wants to go the holier-than-thou route, you can take it there by dragging him by his ear.

He sucks his teeth and looks down at the table. “I'm speaking from experience. Lying damages everything in the long run. That's why I’m encouraging honesty.”

There’s a sudden wash of guilt when you look at his eyes that quickly try to cover up what seems like hurt. However, your pride has always been an issue. 

“No.” You say quickly. He licks his lips and gives a cheerless smile. You don't like it. You are not liking how you're snapping at someone who has only been kind to you. “Well, I won't tell.”

Good.

He taps on the table. “Food any good here?” You shake your head no. “Awful, terrible.”

He looks at you warmly. “I'm sure I'll love it. Maybe we can finish that meal we never got to?”

Fucking Deku felt bad about it and came back to pay. The damn goodie goodie. Noa wipes the table. Izuku points to him. “Ah, no wonder where he got it from.” 

You scoff and try to fight the smile on your face as the two of you watch Noa. “Yeah, he helps me wait on tables and stuff.”

“Well, at least he’s not in the kitchen.” You suck in your lips. “Right, (Y/n)?”

Izuku leans in. “Right?”

“He’s fine!” You point to a distracted Noa. Izuku’s face is fit for a comic book. He grips the edge of the table. “Why would you do that?!”

You smack the table. “Stop screaming at me!” Noa starts to cry and calls for papa again. The two of you freeze. “Is that what he said? He said-”

“He said mama first!” Noa said dada when Izuku walked in, but Izuku must not have heard him. You have been working with this little punk all this time just for him to say papa? You’re shooting daggers at your robo-son. The audacity, the gall, the disrespect. Disgusting! 

Yona pokes her head out. “Lie. Yes, our favorite broccoli boy, you’re daddy.” 

Izuku stands and picks Noa up. “Yay, big boy! Say it again!” Noa gives him a kiss. Not a bite like he does you. He repeats his first word. Repulsive!

Izuku rubs his face against Noa’s. Yona, the new retirement home victim, records it then gets close to your face. “Aw, one day the baby boy will say mommy. He just happens to not like you.”

“I have an entire drawer filled with brochures. For you.” You have been collecting nursing home brochures to scare her with and even give them to her kids. 

“I am nowhere near retirement age!” Her wings slightly flutter then pin themselves on her back.

“Then why are you scared?” She goes to hit you with the towel.

“Girls, girls, now is not the time to do that. It’s time for a refill, seriously, get off your asses.” Yona shushes one of the customers, Aoi, who waves a cup around.

You go back to studying Izuku and Noa. Both look your way. Noa with a cheesy grin and Izuku with a curious look that settles into one of knowing. “You wouldn’t happen to be jealous, would you?”

“No.” 

  He does a sharp intake of air and slowly makes his way to you. “Ah, because he really does like me, no?” He slowly makes his way to you. “Noa, say, mama.” Noa doesn’t speak. 

“Nope, doesn’t bother me.”

You tap your foot, trying to ignore the inching Izuku who looks disgustingly mischievous. Noa rests on his hip naturally. Izuku leans down with a smirk. “Y’know, I could help you. I’ll teach you on how to speak in ‘Noa language .’” 

  Your bottom lip sticks out, your leg bouncing. “I speak Noa language just fine, thank you.”

“Say mama!” Noa shakes his head no. You smack the table again. “I don’t deserve this disrespect!” Izuku laughs and places his hand on the back of your neck gently and says, “It’ll happen eventually, my dearest. Or maybe he really doesn’t like you.”

What he called you goes over your head.

---------------

A week later, it’s time for the Sports Festival. It’s been so awkward and warm between you and Izuku since he found out. For some reason, there is a lightness to it all. It’s that dark cloud hanging over your head that won’t leave that’s making you fail to trust the situation. This cloud has formed over the course of your life. You can't just get rid of it because of one nice person.

 Anyway, you promised you’d be there cheering. You sit next to your friends on the stands. Everyone is up and bouncing despite the hard days of studying. Lately, tests and homework have been a challenge since Noa turned one. He’s been even more curious and adventurous. Whenever you try to calm him so you can work, he gets even louder and becomes disruptive. You don’t know how many times you’ve apologized.

Right now, you’re focused on the Sports Festival. It’s the first since Shigaraki. It is one of the things he didn’t ruin. It’s all going good, going smooth. Your mood is upbeat until you spot Kaibara with a smile. He waves at the spectators, spots you then looks away. 

Concerning Kaibara, you’ve given up on him. You were lenient to a fault because of him being your partner, but he has shown you that he doesn’t deserve anything. The only thing you include him in is the progress report. You can pat yourself on the back and say that you tried. That you were the one that didn’t fail, it was him.

Halfway into the Sports Festival, Noa squeals in excitement as Izuku is on the screen. He’s allowed to wear only parts of his suit for this. Was there concern about it? During Izuku’s first year, support items were allowed and his suit is a support item too. Then again, it gives him back the power of a god. People may view it as cheating. That alone is reasonable, but it is also a spit in the face for the students. It is as if the people are calling them weak. It has the same quirks he has in the first run, so what’s the difference? Perhaps it is fear more than anything.

Izuku hasn’t explained it but doesn’t he still have some of the quirk left? Maybe that’s a reason too. He has shown superior speed and strength than his peers who don’t have a quirk to aid them in those areas. Would it be fair if he had that and still used a suit? It goes above your head.

After every trial, Izuku finds you and Noa in the stands. He waves at you with a flush to his cheeks every time he does so. At first, your stupid brain made you think it’s because of you and not because of the physical exertion. Thankfully, common sense won out.

  He’s doing really well with the scraps of his suit. Carefully planning while he goes around or through his friends’ quirks. Izuku’s speed and strength is still incredible. Not as fast as Iida but definitely second place. 

 Overall, the hero course is truly something. These two classes alone show promise and there are so many schools that probably hold just as much talent. If another Tomura were to happen, the world will have a better time with it than the first go around.

Noa wiggles on your lap when Izuku stands in the arena. Noa leans forward and tries to reach Izuku. You notice that the green haired boy hasn’t looked up at the two of you this time. 

  “And back from the dead, Izuku Midoriya! Who will win? Who, who, wh-” Present Mic bounces in his seat. 

“Shut up.” Aizawa cuts him off and tells Snipe to start the match since Mic is getting on his nerves again. 

  The crowd cheers and shouts their names. The babies all have those clunky headphones on to cancel out the noise. Noa has decided that he hates his and keeps trying to take them off. And just when your eyes are off of him so you can stop Noa, Izuku wins this round. You look back up and see class B’s Kendo, flat on the ground. “Damn it.”

  Up next is Todoroki and Tetsutetsu. Naturally, you know who to cheer for. You stand up but Riko pulls you down quickly.

 “Let’s do it, Tetsu! You got this!” 

“You are so obvious, I swear.” Riko rolls her eyes then stands. With loud claps to go with it, she shouts, “Win, Tetsu!” 

“I’m obvious but you join in?” Noa frowns and points at her. “I know, Auntie Riko is a mess.”

She gestures to herself. “It’s better when I do it.” 

  It’s an interesting fight. Apparently, they went against each other in their first year. He had trained his body to withstand extreme temperatures and was able to deliver amazing blows. It ended in a draw but without Tetsu, class B would have lost. 

  “Whoop his ass, Tetsu!” You and another person shout. You look over and see a girl passionately screaming against Todoroki. In her hands is an infant with her features but familiar dual-colored eyes.

Tetsu punches Todoroki in the face, sending him back. Todoroki catches himself from falling over. “Deadbeat motherfucker!”

 Tetsutestu lands another punch. Todoroki shoots out his flames directly at the steel boy. Despite the terrible heat, Real Steel takes it all on.

"Endeavor lover!" Jule screams with his baby on his hip mimicking his hand waves. You’re jumping up and down, completely entertained by the fight. With every hit Tetsu gets in, the general studies shout, “Yes!”

Tetsu dodges one of Todoroki’s hits and lands a kick of his own. What was that Mirko said? Those with long range quirks are usually weak in combat? She definitely hit it on the head. Todoroki is great, but Tetsu is fierce. Each hit is clearly doing some damage. Every punch seems to knock the wind out of Todoroki. If this were anyone else, they'd be flat on their asses.

“You got this, Real Steel!” He’s relentless. Even though he’s stark red from the terrible heat, he doesn’t stop. You know nothing about the heroes' training or fighting, but it looks like his movements are getting more fluid, looser in a good way. ��

In a strange turn of events, right after Todoroki shoots out a powerful blast, he freezes the stadium, barely missing the onlookers. It immediately stops the cheering for Tetsutestu. You scream as you fall back to your seat. The ice is dangerously close to the audience. Noa shivers and sniffles from the frost. Immediately, you rub him to get some heat. 

  “Um, Tetsutestu is out! Todoroki wins!”

“Boo!” 

-

 Next is, you can’t believe your eyes, Kaibara versus Yaoyorozu. Both stand proudly on the opposite sides. They are ignoring the crowd and focusing on the task.

“Y'all both suck ass!” 

“Boo!” 

  “Deadbeat motherfuckers!” Again, you don’t know who that came from. What you do know is that everyone in general studies are against those who have shown their true colors. 

  “It’s a death match! Yes!” You scream. Snipe shakes his head and points to you. The camera goes to you. You tense up at the camera and lower yourself. 

“Anyway, as you can see, these two are not popular. The majority of the heroes don’t have many fans Eraser…”

“Popularity isn’t necessary. Heroics should have nothing to do with a popularity contest.” Aizawa says sternly. You roll your eyes. With hollowing your hands, you shout, “Boo! You two in the booth suck!”

Riko touches your shoulder. “Sh, let the violence relax you.”

“Begin!” 

  You see Benio intently watching. He shields Kobeni from the fight. Right then, Kaibara runs to Yaoyorozu who immediately blocks his attack. It’s the same mistake she made in the first year. She got nervous during the one on one and got pushed out. Now, she seems to be doing the same thing. Clearly, she’s more of a support hero than a fighter.

  Kaibara drills right through her shield. Surprisingly, she had a gift for him in the shape of a gun with non lethal bullets. Your eyes are glued to the fight. There’s no way he’ll be able to dodge them, right? 

  Suddenly, as she fires them with excellent precision, he manages to drill his body to protect himself, spinning round and round until the bullets fly away. Whatever the hero course is teaching these students, it is absolutely working because both of them slide and run from the other, one trying to close the distance, the other tries to create it.

  Yaoyorozu comes through with a baton that sparks electricity. She charges at him and duels. With every drilling twirl of his, goes through her electric baton, only to be met with another. Finally, Kaibara stops holding back, apparently. 

  He’s a monster. She’s creating shields and tries to come up with weapons, but in terms of martial arts, he is a savage that Yaoyorozu can’t keep up with. It takes one hit to the face, and she’s thrown back and outside the lines.

 That…was exciting. She wasn’t scared or nervous like she was in her first year. Now, she faced her opponent head on. Yaoyorozu seems to need more training in fighting, though. Other than that, Benio's baby mama was amazing.

You peer at Benio who fights a smile then takes a deep breath. He kisses Kobeni’s head and leans back. Is he trying not to be happy?

  There are more fights that earn several boos. One had a purple haired boy, Shinsou, that was surprisingly really good. It was quick for him. He went against the antagonistic blond boy, Monoma, and won. You’d think that since Monoma knows about Shinsou's quirk, he'd shut up but no. It’s too much for him. You shake your head and watch as other matches go down. Finally, there is one that catches your attention by far.

“We have Izuku Midoriya, with only parts of his suit, and Sen Kaibara!”

  Noa calls out ‘papa’. Izuku looks up and sees Noa shaking his hand at him. “You can do it!” You shout. Kaibara turns around and sees the two of you. The camera zooms up on Izuku who is still excitedly waving, making Noa do the same. Lost in the moment of you cheering, you blow a kiss to him. It goes right over your head. Doing it came naturally.

You don’t look at Kaibara until you for sure feel his eyes on you. You make eye contact and instantly regret it. The more he stares, the more anxious you feel. His expression goes from indifference, annoyance, confusion, and finally to anger. All of these in the span of a few seconds. 

   You stop cheering and tense up. Noa continues to call Izuku papa, not realizing that the man in front of Izuku is his real father. He is totally unaffected by the look in Kaibara’s eyes. Kaibara moves his jaw and flares his nostrils. He turns around and faces Izuku who does not look happy. Izuku has totally changed his demeanor. You kiss Noa’s face and lower his standing form. 

  “Are you okay?” Riko asks. You turn to her. “Yeah, yeah, I’m just a little tired.”

What do you say to her? What was that anyway and why did you feel it? He wasn’t near you. “You sure?”

  You shake your head at Riko. “I must be feeling off.” It’s the truth. You weren't scared or anything, just unnerved. No way would you ever tell anyone this, though.

  Riko hums. Right as she does, Snipe yells, “Begin!”

In an instant, Izuku is on Kaibara without giving the latter a second to drill or block. Kaibara’s face is taking hit after hit. Next, Izuku lowers Kaibara so he can kick him in the chest. Kaibara takes this and flips Izuku over.

“Sweep the leg!” You yell. Following you, Izuku sweeps his leg to hit Kaibara’s knee, leaving a crunch noise behind. You cover Noa’s eyes so he doesn’t see that. Kaibara miraculously fights without thinking about it. How long has that taken him? How much training did he have to do in order to swirl his leg back to its original place with his quirk to keep it still?

  Kaibara isn’t done and Izuku’s just getting started. The fight is fast and messy, yet each hit is deliberate and trained. Both are bleeding, from Izuku’s nose to Kaibara’s mouth and cheek. He has a gash that Recovery Girl will need to handle. Kaibara is displaying master artistry in martial arts. Even without using his quirk, he’d be deadly to villains. 

  Izuku hasn’t used his suit once, though.

Finally, somehow, Izuku gives a powerful kick upward, sending his opponent up. With complete savagery, you see Izuku fling Kaibara around in the air to drop him. They both land with a shake of the ground. Kaibara barely manages to stand while Izuku does it perfectly with power. 

With mighty punches and kicks, Kaibara isn’t able to even defend. Izuku hasn’t even used his suit yet. Izuku right hooks Kaibara and is met with cheers with every swing. The crowd shouts his name and his alias, Deku. The energy from the fight is so intense, you can almost see it flow into the air for the audience to absorb it. 

“Get it, Deku!” Ema pumps her fist in the air.

“Deadbeat motherfucker!” 

You stand and shout, “Grab the bag, rob his wallet, hit the bank, and beat his ass! Yes!” 

  Riko pats your thigh. “Where did you get that?!”

Izuku grabs Kaibara’s hand. Kaibara uses his quirk in retaliation, making Izuku's skin raw by the rapid spinning. Yet, there’s a smile on Izuku's face. With one squeeze, Izuku completely crushes Kaibara's hand. Immediately, blood gushes out. You are on the edge of your seat when Izuku is flung back in a circle. Kaibara is something else. He hasn’t slowed down and manages to keep his weight off his broken knee.

  “He isn’t using it…” You whisper as the fight goes on. Izuku has a suit that could be used against Kaibara’s quirk. Looking at the fight and knowing what Izuku is used to doing, it’s like he’s playing with his food. 

“It’s a fist fight for him. The parts of the suit are still incredibly strong and fit to use against those with an offensive quirk,” Riko leans in, “This isn’t a competition for him. It’s an all out brawl.”

  Finally, Izuku moves his arms. Immediately, everyone recognizes Gear Shift. Kaibara, for the first time, takes a step back. That is all Izuku needs to land three hits. One punch to the nose, one to the gut, and a kick to send him back. The epic sounds are thunderous seconds after Kaibara is sent flying through the stadium’s wall. The impact affects the entire arena. The vibration is right under your feet and the blast of wind pushes you back into your seat. All of this happened and Kaibara didn't land near you.

 Your jaw drops. You’ve never seen Izuku in action. And this is what Shigaraki was dealing with? And Izuku only used the suit for one thing. He has a bruise on his jaw and his hand is bleeding. He’s lowered in a hunched position, ready to strike if Kaibara comes back. 

The arena is silent. 

Everyone knows that Izuku’s suit is fit for him only. What he has on are his usual arm compressions and shin guards. Each of these give him the ability to use some of his suit’s quirks. And yet, he didn’t need it. In fact, he could have done without the Gear Shift. Riko was right. This was a straight up brawl. If you aren’t mistaken, it looked personal.

  “The winner is Izuku Midoriya!”

He straightens up and looks at you, already knowing where you are. You smile warmly, standing again to cheer for the man who can do anything. Noa, of course, has to be the loudest and call for his papa. You stand back up and blow him a kiss. Izuku's eyes shine.

The Sports Festival is an intense event. People you didn’t expect to get far got the farthest, for instance, Jirou absolutely dominated her opponents until she came across Kaminari, whose electricity had knocked her down. At least she tore him up before she got out. Uraraka’s awakening helped tremendously. Honestly, she’s scary as hell. It was amazing to see her and Bakugou go against each other again. It was incredibly close. Bakugou had barely made it. Present Mic of course, the president of her fan club, wasn’t thrilled and made it known. He even wanted a rematch. 

  Then it came down to Todoroki, Bakugou, and Izuku. This is the fights that people have been waiting to see. Both Bakugou and Todoroki have shown how brutal they are compared to their first year. And no one thought that Izuku would be able to make it this far with or without his suit, yet here he is proving them wrong left and right. His technique, intelligence and natural physical prowess are immaculate. And with his suit, he still bears a striking resemblance to the boy with everything.

Unfortunately, Noa decided to be a boob and knock his headphones off right when Bakugou’s quirk exploded at Todoroki. The sound irritated him so badly, you had to leave and go into the hallway. In true Noa fashion, he stopped and fell asleep with his usual ding, then would wake up with a bird’s hum, then go right back down. Right when the Sports Festival was over. You had missed it.

-------------------------

You enter Recovery Girl’s office to find Izuku on the bed. He perks up when he sees you and Noa, who is no longer sleeping.

  “How’re you doing?”

“Pretty good! I thought I wasn't going to get far without the suit.” He smiles widely and sits up, still tucked under the covers. You wonder if he's actually okay. Izuku, for the short time you've known him, hides himself away.

You feel so guilty. “I wanted to see-”

“I understand. It’s probably better that way. Kacchan’s quirk is loud so I don’t know if Noa could handle that.”

  You sigh and sit on the foot of his bed. “He couldn’t. Right when Kacchan used his quirk, Noa freaked.”

“Kacchan?”  He raises his eyebrows in shock.

“That’s his name, right?” Noa rocks himself back and forth in excitement. “It’s my name for him-”

“Are you jealous?” You ask in the same tone he did back at the restaurant. He scoffs. “No. I’m worried for you, that’s all. He might get mad.”

  “I do as I please.” He chuckles and leans back. “He’s definitely going to be mad.”

You shrug. “Whatever,” You play with Noa’s face. “Did you win?”

After a moment, Izuku sucks on his teeth and looks at you through his lashes. “We can watch it together some time instead of me telling you. If you want too!”

“I guess? Yeah, keep the suspense up so I’ll be on my toes around you?”

“No!”

“I don’t know Izuku, you’re a brutal fighter.” You smirk and sit on the foot of the bed. “I didn’t think they’d let you use the suit to be honest.” You set Noa down who then crawls to his favorite. Hmph.

You scratch your cheek. Your eyes dart away from his, not really wanting to say what’s to come. It’s surely vain. Quietly, you ask, “Did you know you’d face him?”

“No.”

You haven't looked at him yet. “Um, thanks for punching him in the face then. I know it’s a competition so it can’t be ah, that-”

“For what?” He kisses Noa on the head. You take a deep breath. “I know it wasn’t for me. It’s just nice to see him get hit.”

  Izuku gives a closed mouth smile. Even without teeth it’s genuine. “It was both. Yeah, it’s a competition but he deserved it.” He sits up. “I saw how scared you got. (Y/n),” 

  You’re facing the window, only seeing him from the corner of your eye. “I won't let you be scared. I was happy to beat him for you.”

  You turn your face fully to him. “I wasn’t scared.”

“I know.” He says, after a few seconds of staring at you. Even though he agrees, you aren’t dumb enough to believe he meant it. You weren’t scared. Unnerved, yes. But not scared. Sen Kaibara won’t hurt you again. Not when his reputation is still slightly on the rocks. It was the hostility when he looked at you that was unnerving.

You mess with the soft, white cotton blanket. It is warm and comforting. Something to hold you down in this conversation with a boy who is making your heart flutter despite him being annoying. To change the topic, you decide to tease him. “Noa was mimicking you. I don’t know if I like that. You may not be a good influence, Deku.”

You barely know him, but he is someone you’ve come to start welcoming inside your built walls. Even though you hate heroes, this one may be the only one in your grace.

  “I think Noa likes me just fine. He’s turning out okay, too.” He shrugs. You squint your eyes and hum. “Mm, it’s me you have to worry about Deku.”

He’s a little flushed. “Well, I’ll just have to win you over, won’t I?”

   There’s no way that meant anything, so stop.

 You sigh and watch Noa stand up and mess with Izuku’s face. “Y’know, you could teach him some of your moves. For self defense and all.”

“Eh?! That’s too dangerous!” He holds Noa close to him. Izuku bounces the boy a little and asks, “You don’t want to do that, Noa.”

You lean in, ready to antagonize Izuku who is desperately telling Noa to never do it. “Yes you do, buddy! You want to be just like daddy, huh?” Noa squeals and says yes. Izuku gasps. “Where’s my phone? We gotta get this!”

 You take out yours and hit record. “Noa, say hi daddy!”

“Hi, daddy.” For the first time, he’s able to pronounce daddy, rather than papa. “Noa, say mama!”

Silence.

“Call me mommy!” He remains silent and just stares at the camera then to you. “Oh my God.”

Izuku bursts out laughing. Noa goes along with him, the little asshole. You sigh and are about to put the camera away until he looks directly at you and says, “Love ya.”

Your breath stops. These robots are said not to have souls and yet he said that with a brightness in his eyes. He said it smoothly like music. You hope Izuku doesn’t notice how you are frozen and warm. You pray that this feeling of fondness and care for Noa goes away. That somehow, you'll be sensible enough to not love him. You won't, no matter how much Noa says he loves you. And how much it sounds like he means it.

“Good job, Noa! Say it for me, please? Say I love you.” Izuku urges. Noa doesn’t do it. It’s your turn to laugh at Izuku’s expense. He tries and tries to get Noa to say it, to the point of tears.

----------------------

You scratch your head at your notes. Recently, Snipe decided that his students weren’t able to do major tests like before. No one could get a hold of studying at the same time, even Ema. So, he decided to give more time to prepare and a study guide everyone went through in class.

  However, Noa, in all his wisdom, decided that having a fit that involved throwing himself around was necessary. Snipe was annoyed so rather than listen to him bitch and complain, you excused yourself to the bathroom to calm him. 

  When you went back, class was over. 

Your heart dropped. None of your friends had the energy or hands to do two papers. Snipe stopped you from leaving and gave you a set of them. They were all over the place and sloppy. They were the teacher’s notes. He didn’t say anything other than how cute Noa is in the videos. Without another word, you knew what that meant. So, you left the classroom and went about your day with a smile. Now, here you sit with Noa in front of you playing with Riko’s gifted toys and snacking on banana puffs. He feels the need to show you everything he has in his hand and if you don’t look, he growls. He’s cute but distracting. 

Suddenly, a familiar voice calls out, “(Y/n), Noa! I’m here!” Izuku jogs to you with a heavy looking backpack and another bag. At first glance you see more snacks and books. 

  “I thought he’d like these. It’s the same I grew up with.” He puts the cereal on the table. “I remember those. Not too many, Izuku. That’s a lot of sugar.”

  He nods. “Not all of these are for him.” He pops several in his mouth. After swallowing, he asks, “What’re you doing?”

“Remember that test? He gave us a study guide and I’m trying to look at.”

Izuku perks up. “I’ll help! Noa and I both. Ain’t that right bub? We’re gonna help mama?” Noa responds with the awful word, papa.

  “Um, can you watch Noa while I study instead? I won’t be long, I promise.”

“That’s a good idea. It’s been a long time since Noa and I bonded.” He ruffles Noa's hair. You blink once then twice. “You just saw him two hours ago.”

“Yeah, I saw him. We didn’t hang out, (Y/n)!” 

You rub your eyes. “Alright, then. I’ll be in my room. Call if you need me, okay?” He shoos you away and eats the cereal with Noa, who is equally obsessed with it.

-

You look around for your boy who was just playing with the colorful blocks that he's obsessed with. Worry starts to creep inside you. You left Izuku and Noa in front of the coffee table in the commons. Now an hour later, the boys are gone. The only thing there on the table is Noa's colorful plate of what looks like sweet potatoes and Izuku's cereal right next to it. 

“Have you seen Noa?” Jule shakes his head no.

“Have you seen Noa?” Sakura says no and adds like the little bitch she is, “Lost him already?”

On her hip is Mira, an exact replica of Kacchan but with her mother’s hair color. It isn't as spiked as his either. She is a cute little thing but is so bratty. Even now her arms are crossed and glaring. It is a little scary how much she acts like him for an eight-month-old.

  “Have Mira for the first time ever? Actually being useful? Big happenings for both of us.” Sakura gasps and in Mira fashion, the baby laughs at her mother.

  Have you seen Noa? Is repeatedly asked in your dorm and every time it is answered with the same word: no. It's practically an echo by now.

 “Noa! Noa?” You run through the halls. You call Izuku with no answer. Finally, you run across a large room which was decided by your class to be the movie room. You hear noises in it. Slowly opening it, you gently call out Noa’s name. A weight is lifted off of your chest when you see Izuku laying down on the orange sofa with Noa on his chest. A gory zombie movie plays on the screen which goes ignored with snores.

  You walk up to the boys and see that they’re totally fine. It seems that both of them played hard. You poke Izuku several times. He wakes up with a jump, nearly knocking off Noa. “Hey!” You quickly grab the baby before he falls.

“Oh no! No, no, no, is he okay?” You hold Noa protectively while Izuku jumps up and puts his hands out. “He’s fine.”

“I-I’m sorry. I have trouble waking up like that.” Ah, that’s right. The wars. You stop tensing up and slowly release. You totally forgot about them and the effects it might’ve had on him.

“Um, Izuku,” You pat Noa’s back. “I really appreciate you and all but, please don’t take off with him like that. It scared the hell out of me.”

He looks confused for a second then gasps. “Shit-excuse me-I’m sorry for that. I didn’t think about it.”

 You smile as the future hero looks panicky. The movie continues to play and gets progressively scarier. “I, ah, want to go outside. You coming with?” Izuku looks around then at the ground. “You sure?”

“Positive. Anything to get away from this movie.” He looks taken back then defends it. “It’s a classic!”

“It’s nasty!” You leave the room and head to yours to get Noa’s bag. Izuku follows you closely. “Zombie movies are imperative to cinema. They’re great monster movies.”

  You struggle to get your key from your pocket. As he defends the movie, he takes it from you and opens the door for you. “Whatever. It’s an excuse to watch gory porn.”

“What?!” You can’t help but laugh at his face. He’s growing increasingly offended. “I said what I said. How can anyone watch a movie where people are being eaten if someone isn’t into that kind of stuff?”

“Well, you like slasher films!” 

“Barely. Another thing, people are interesting. Why do they kill? Why is the dumb blonde in the woods? Why are they going up the stairs? Not dead humans who eat brains.” He takes Noa’s bag and when you leave your room, he locks it for you. “That is an old stereotype. Zombies eat people, not just brains. And slasher films are not psychological thrillers. They’re just as gory as zombie movies.”

“Agree to disagree. Even though I’m right.” He scoffs and opens the door to the dorms. The sun is bright, and the breeze is perfect. He lets you walk out first. “Whatever! It is not gory porn.”

“I knew you were freaky. What is that saying? Save a horse, ride a zombie.”

“What? Now who’s the freak-” His voice starts to raise to protect his nasty movies. You don't bother to hide your smile. “You watch bloody porn. I don't think you have the right to insult me.”

“I do not watch bloody porn!” A teacher stops and stares. The great hero Deku’s breathing stops. His eyes are blank and unfocused. You don't even try to hold in your laugh. With a proper voice, the hero in purple tights says, “Do what you want on your own time, Deku. But please don't say it out loud.”

The hero walks away. Izuku has yet to get life back in his eyes. Meanwhile, you have the ugliest laugh at his devastation.

-

The three of you sit on the grass. In Noa’s bag were some toys and his banana puffs. You laid everything out for him to get his hands on. He sits in front of you two and after he picks each of them up, he shows you what it is. Izuku acts incredibly interested. You lie on your back against Izuku’s jacket and rest in the sun. He insisted on you and Noa sitting on it.

  “Deku!” The loud and raspy voice annoys the hell out of you. The source stomps along the pavement, heading towards you and Noa, the unsuspecting victims of his voice. Izuku smiles widely and holds Noa up. “Kacchan, he said his first word!”

The spikey haired blonde holds his twin on his hip. Sakura must've tossed Mira to him again. Mira sports the same expression as her dad when she sees Noa, who is totally oblivious. 

“Mine’s already done that!” For some reason, perhaps out of sheer possession of evil, he makes this gremlin face. Mira smiles at her dad, clearly amused by it. 

“Noa said papa! Isn't he cute?”

“Ain't this drill boy’s kid? And that's his first word?” Kacchan stares down at you. His red eyes aren't judgmental, but genuinely curious. Mira’s identical red eyes however, are totally rude. 

“He calls me papa!” Izuku says proudly. Then, with the same smugness as before, he adds, “What was Mira’s first word?”

Kacchan glares at Izuku. Through his gritted teeth he says, “Bitch.”

At first you think he’s insulting Izuku until it sinks in. Mira’s first word is actually bitch. You cover your mouth in an attempt to stop the laughter. Finally, you fall back. “Oh my God!” 

Izuku, as you suspected, knew what her first word was. You were upset that Noa has yet to say mama, though after hearing this, you’re happy with what you got. Better that than being called a ‘bitch’.

“Fucking Deku!” 

Izuku sets Noa down. “I’ll be right back.”

Some of class A stand at the side next to the tall and healthy trees. A few of them have their dolls, including Kaminari and Todoroki. You rubbed your eyes when you saw them. Your hands turn to fists on the grass as you look at those two in particular. Apparently, Todoroki has been pathetic in this project. And it’s his fault!

Before you can get up to give him a piece of your mind, Noa stands up, gives you a sloppy kiss, and says, “papa.”

Noa, for the first time, starts to walk. “Izuku!” 

He turns around and quickly gets his camera. “That’s my boy! Look at him go-here record this!” He hands it to Todoroki and gets on the ground with his arms open. Noa makes a wobbly run for it. You cross your arms. You’re happy Noa’s doing this, but this is some bullshit. 

Ema comes up to you without Hana. She points her thumb behind her. “Uh, Nezu and co. want to see you.”

“Alright, after-”

“No, they mean now. Either I went to get you or a teacher.” You freeze then look at Izuku who doesn’t see this. Did he snitch on you? 

  You get up and call out, “I have to go somewhere.” You don’t look at him again when Ema walks with you to the principal’s office. Your heart is practically coming out of your chest. Wait, who’s to say it’s because of your secret? It could be one of your many outbursts that's finally gotten you in trouble! It could be something different. 

  Your heart starts to calm down. Thankfully, your knees stop shaking so much. This anxiety could be leading you to something completely false. Izuku knows and said he wouldn’t tell, Kaibara has known for a while and hasn’t said anything either and there were tons of times he could have. So, you’re in the clear. Snipe is probably just mad again. 

  You open the door and a teacher, what’s her face, thanks Ema and excuses her. All of the general studies teachers are here. Nezu sits at his desk. The movement at your side makes you look over and lo and behold, Kaibara.

 Nezu, in a lighthearted voice says, “We have been told that you are working, (L/n).” 

Son of a bitch. You stare at Nezu, not breathing. “Don’t deny it, we’ve seen proof. We just want to go over the rules with you.”

“What evide-”

The door opens and Izuku comes in. “Principal Nezu?” 

“We’ll keep this short with you Midoriya. Did you know that (L/n) is working at a restaurant?” Since when is he involved? And where's Noa?

  Izuku opens his mouth. “Before you lie, know that this is just confirmation that she was seen there.”

Izuku says nothing. His teacher sighs and Nezu excuses him. Izuku doesn’t leave and instead stands between you and Kaibara. “Midor-”

“With all due respect, but this requires more than the insight of the teachers and a bitter partner.”

  “Bitter?” Kaibara scoffs. “She stole-”

“It’s not stealing if you participated in the project.” Eraserhead flicks his eyes over to Kaibara. Dracula speaks, “Kaibara, there’s nothing wrong with her asking you to participate financially. What’s wrong is that you kept this from us.”

“How is it his business? Or any of yours?” Your heart rate is racing right now. At the beginning, you were afraid Kaibara would say something. After your talk in the yard, you don't remember if he mentioned it. Part of you, a naive and senseless part, thought he forgot, that maybe he let it slip from his mind.

Of course, he was just waiting to strike. Why? After all of these months he chooses now. Noa is a year old, talking and walking, and you’re doing all of the work! You haven’t asked him for a thing since then. The only request you have for him is to participate in the report and like Benio and Yaoyorzoru, he’s copying your homework. Plus, it’s only once a month!

  So, what happened? Why?

Izuku stays by your side even when he is repeatedly dismissed. “(L/n), this job you have, no matter how mundane, has to end.”

Your throat is tight. “This isn’t fair.”

“It doesn’t seem like it, but your scholarship requires your full attention, and your grades are already slippi-”

“Because of this stupid project! You heroes are the laziest sack of shits I’ve ever met.”

Snipe stands up and hisses out your name. “No, no! My stipend is less than others because I’m a scholarship kid. And he-” You point to Kaibara. “Hasn’t done anything! I have to force him to meet up once a month to do the progress report. That’s it! He hasn’t even held Noa!”

“That’s not tr-”

You cut Kaibara off. “Did you know Noa said his first word? He walks? That he likes banana puffs and mashed potatoes? How about rice and Izuku’s katsudon? How about the fact he thinks Izuku Midoriya is his daddy! Because you aren’t there!”

  Everyone remains silent. “Yes, I work. I have bills to pay and Noa to provide for. That stipend is just a few bucks that barely covers anything. And Kaibara literally gave me twenty dollars that one time. I paid for the rest and went without.”

“We know-” You interrupt Nezu. “You don’t know. Yes, I work. My job prevents me going from without and now that Noa is added on, I need it more than ever. The project is hurting us except for the future pros. Who not only get paid by you but also by people’s taxes. And I’m in trouble for what? Actually doing something? Managing a job, school, Noa, and that thing right there?” Kaibara scoffs when you point at him. “Where’s Tomura when you need him, oh my God.”

Izuku touches your arm. You move it away. “Nah, this is why the people don’t and never will, trust your asses. I trust Sir Dusty over you people any day of the week.”

Nezu stands on the table with his hands behind his back. Kaibara clears his throat. “With that being said and the slander against me and her clear support of the League, I think it should be noted that she hangs out with villains regularly.”

  You turn your head to him so fast. “Kenji Hara is a villain who was a known serial killer a few years back. I'm worried for Noa and even her safety. That’s why I brought this whole thing up.”

“Thank you for bringing it to our attention even though you should’ve said she was violating the rules of the scholarship sooner. If you truly were concerned for her safety, we should've been notified immediately.” Dracula gestures to you.

  Your eyes are bulging. He did not just bring Ken into this. “Lord forbid the man had a hobby!"

"Murder is not okay!"

"I never said it was. And he paid his debt!" Kaibara opens his stupid mouth. "He ripped people's bones-"

"He now gets them ethically."

Eraserhead inhales deeply. “Fraternizing with villains isn’t a proper thing to do, (L/n). Especially one of such violence.” 

“But killing them is? Need I remind you of the countless human beings you have killed?”

Izuku tenses next to you. Snipe rubs his face under his mask. You take the stage since no one says anything. “I said what I said. This whole thing isn’t fair and for you to judge me for rubbing elbows with someone who made his own choices in life is bullshit. How much sense does that make? He’s killed people and so have you! What’s the difference?”

Eraserhead sighs for the millionth time. He's wearing a facade of indifference, but you can tell you're chiseling it away. “There is a difference. Heroes don’t agree with-”

“Damn, at least Ken takes care of his kids. Can you say the same for yourselves? Not even just the kids. What about us?”

 Nezu answers you in his usual annoyingly chipper voice. “I know this is hard. The baby project has its reasons. Although you should be kicked out for violating the rules of your scholarship that was specifically clear and endangering yourself and others by associating with bad influences," You swear your heart stopped. "I won't punish you for it. You made your point, and we'll give you another chance. Don't slip up like this again. You're very bright, (L/n). It'd be a waste to lose you." Nezu always has such a jolly face.

You want to stab everyone’s eyes out. “Thank you for proving me and the League right. You and the fakes you teach have yet to beat the allegations.”

All of them flinch as your words begin to settle. Those words are held with such conviction and anger that could only be called righteous with the promise of wrath.

--------------

You walk out with your head held high. Izuku stayed behind for some reason and Kaibara has left to the other side of the hallway, not looking back at you. Your breathing is shallow, and your head is spinning. Even still, you march on. You have to find Noa and go to your room. You’ve had enough for today.

 Izuku comes up and touches your arm. “Where’s Noa?” 

“I’ll get him, I’ll be right back.” Once he leaves, you say to yourself, “I need to call Yona.” 

You go to the random chair in the hall. It sits next to the large window and gives a terrible view of the building. No one knows why the window is there or the chair. It’s usually used for when people need to tie their shoes or for phone calls.

  “Hey, Yona? Um, they found out.” She’s dead quiet. “What does that mean?”

“I quit, ma’am.” You’ve been around Yona and Ken since the wars. You were one of the ones that weren’t able to get into a shelter. Ken found you and Yona who stayed close to her restaurant. Heroes have done nothing but disappoint you time and time again.

  “This is a short notice, bug.” You want to be lighthearted and laugh; find joy in her teasing. “Ma’am, it’s been wonderful and an honor to work for you and Ken.” Your voice starts to shake, warning her that you’re about to cry. You hear her ladybug wings flap in the background. They do that when she's nervous.

Izuku comes up and squats to your level. “I have to go.”

“Not go. We’ll see each other soon, little bug.” Her wings are flapping more. You hang up and put your phone in your pocket. You blink a couple of times and look up into his green eyes. He's holding Noa. He stretches out his hand that you don’t take.

You get up and walk back into your room. “Thanks for helping me back there. It won’t happen again.” You take Noa from him and go to set him in his crib that he’s about to outgrow. You have to look into getting another one. Maybe just get a big kid's bed and hope for the best? Perhaps he can just sleep with you now. These are decisions for later.

  Izuku stops you from closing the door. “Wait-”

“I need to do anything that doesn’t involve what happened today, thanks.” He pushes it open anyway. “It’s not good to hold things like this in, (Y/n). Let me help.”

 “And I’m sure you’ve dealt with everything right?” In response, he wraps his arms around you. “I hate this, Izuku. Stop hugging me, I don’t need it.”

You understand he wants to comfort you. Why? What does he get out of it? It’s probably to play the hero. The hero that put you through that mess and he’s best friends with the hero that’s putting you through your current predicament. You can’t really blame him for something All Might brought or that Todoroki started. But God, you’re so mad.

 “Get away from me.” You push him away; his body is like a brick wall, and he doesn’t stumble. He doesn’t look hurt at all. Why is this? Why do you want him to feel pain? He corrected his mistake back then and took Tomura's fine ass out. Izuku’s quirkless now but God, isn’t this a martyr complex he has? Hero complex? Or just straight up annoying?

That's what this is, isn't it? He views you as a project and something to save. You hate them, all of them. “Leave me and Noa alone.” You finally yank him away. He stumbles to the doorway. It’s only right. The heroes have left you alone with this project. Your doll “son” is going to drive you mad. And you can’t afford to fail, or you’ll lose your scholarship and everything you have ever worked for. And for some reason, this all hurts your heart. Pushing him away hurts too, God, do you hate him. All of them. 

  You slam your dorm door in his face. You try to keep it quiet. You try to stiffen up your bottom lip and smile instead before you turn around to face Noa. It will be too familiar if you don’t. You’re trying, you’re trying! So, why are you failing? There must be something you’re doing wrong. Your hands are against the door and the tears fall. These damn tears are happening a lot lately and you hate it. You hate them as much as you do everyone else.

Stop it, stop it!

You’re just so angry, disappointed and disgusted. Sen, why? If this is about the stupid Sports Festival, you had nothing to do with it. Did you cheer him on? Hell no. But you were impressed despite everything. If Izuku’s fight triggered this then oh my God. You had nothing to do with that.

  Noa gurgles and you turn around with puffy eyes and a forced smile. You rub your face and smack your cheeks. “Hey, Noa.”

  He sits up in his crib. His eyes that look full of life and wonder peer up at you, studying. Noa stands up and reaches for you. “Nah, I don’t think that’s a good idea. You’re getting too used to being held.”

  For literally one second he accepts this then takes it all back with a scream. Despite the noise, you’re firm. “You need to learn to be by yourself, y’know.”

  His round eyes look up at you. You wonder what he’d say other than papa. Then again, when they start to talk, they become even more annoying. You just stand in front of him, watching his reaction. He’s technically fine and definitely not real.

 There is a knock on the door again that goes unanswered. Then again and again. Someone’s probably complaining about the noise again or how Noa’s started a chain reaction and now they’re pissed. It’s always the same, it’s always angry here. And you are fully aware you’re the main contributor.

Another knock and another. Noa cries for papa even though Kaibara got off the hook again. You lost, again. War of words has always been considered your forte, so suffering a loss for the nth time because of heroes breaks your heart. You can’t win here.

 Noa is still crying for some reason. How can you comfort him before comforting yourself? 

“(Y/n)!” Izuku’s arms sweep Noa up. The doll rubs his face along his shoulder. “I’m here, I’m here.”

How many times have heroes said that and lied? Every time. They’ve never shown a lick of care. Here one is pretending to care about anyone but himself. A boy with everything at his fingertips and has used it to make you miserable. Him and that peppermint thing in his class. If you were to ever see that asshole, you’re punching him in the face. 

“Are you ok-” Izuku sees you side eye Noa with a blank expression. Izuku places Noa back in his crib. Your eyes go to Izuku. “Get out.”

  “I know you’re upset; I am on your side. Please, don’t take it out on Noa.”

“He’s not real, Midoriya,” With a smirk on your face and malicious intent, you face him. “So don’t worry your green boy scout head. You can’t disappoint him. Unfortunately, you also can’t gain praise. He's just another thing you heroes use to punish us with.”

  Izuku glares and walks towards you. “Because of your kind…” You take a deep breath. “I’m stuck here, and I have to deal with this shit. No job, a child, and a venomous boy who bit me for no reason.”

  You poke his chest. “What are the worst parts? I get pitied by the boy that did all of this and the thing he’s friends with is still here, sleeping happily. Living and relaxing while the rest of us go through the wringer.” Izuku grabs your offending hand that repeatedly pushes on him. “And that thing in the crib isn’t even real, yet I suffer for it. You heroes should’ve crumbled years ago.” You hear Noa sniffle.

Rather than fight back like you craved for, as you expected, he pulls you in and wraps his arms around you. “You think you don’t want it, that you don’t want my help. But dearest, take it anyway. You will take it."

  Why does he keep hugging you? Everything is happening at once. There’s no way you can support Noa with what you get. The only thing left is to give him to Kaibara since he can support him. That means you will be basing your grade, your scholarship, into the hands of someone who hates you. Someone who is spiteful. And the one who is holding you is someone who doesn’t even know you, who pities you, the scholarship kid.

“Let me go.” You growl. He shakes his head no. You growl, struggling to get out of his hold. “I don’t need your pity.”

“I’m not giving it. That’s for people who could have done better and chose not to. You don’t deserve it.” His voice is low in your ear. It feels like vibrations. “You’re too young to be a mother, this is just an assignment, and yet you have a mother’s tears, and I hate it. So, I’ve decided not to pity you. I will help you because I care and understand. I know someone who had the same tears, and I hated it then, too. Do you understand? I will help you whether you like it or not because I care.”

  Your breath is shaky. He cradles your body with one arm and his other hand goes to your head, bringing it to him and placing a kiss on it that neither of you will talk about. You pause, no longer crying.

“You want to help, Deku?” 

He tenses for a second. “Yes?” He separates himself from you to look at your small smile. “Can you watch Noa for a second? I just need some air. I’ll be back soon, promise.”

--------------------------

You charge through the library on a mission. For years, the people have had to play by the heroes' rules and millions of people get left behind. Look at League, who just needed help and when they opened their mouth, it was smacked. Then heroes stomped on them to their death.

  You put several old and weathered books in Noa’s stroller that you’re using as a cart. “Bad influence? Ken’s a bad influence? What the hell are you a saint?”

Books fall into the stroller. The librarian comes around and tells you to calm down. You cry out, “You are the bad influence! How many people have to suffer for you to realize that!”

  You come across a tall shelf and raise your hand to the person on the ladder. “That one! All of them! Give me the U.A. rule books!” U.A prides itself on innovation and progression. The technology used is state of the art and fits any and all heroes and support. However, they are still traditional and play by the old rules as much as society does.

“To protect a sexual deviant and another who puts his hands on his partner, hell no. A villain is a villain, right? What the fuck does that make you!” 

You continue gathering as many books as you can. You struggle to push the stroller to an empty table. “Why’d you call us?” Benio comes in with Kobeni, of course. Because no way is Yaoyorozu helping him. 

As you slam books on the table, you ask, “Do you trust me?” 

“What?” The rest of your class come in. All of them in various conditions. All of Jule’s eyes have bags under them and Sakura’s usually perfect hair is mussed. 

“I’m not going down like this. I lost to these assholes twice, maybe even more, because I wasn’t prepared. This is their turf. You can’t go to someone’s home field without being prepared.” You set books down on the table. “So, do you trust me?”

 Benio is the first to realize what you're doing, what you're going to do. “I trust you.”

“I’m not a fucking punk. And none of you are either. I need you to trust me and the move I’ll make for us. I just need your help.”

  “With what?” Ema comes forward without Hana. 

“I am going to go head to head with them and show them that they are wrong for this. The project, their expectations, the inequality, all of it. But I need proof to do it because our conditions aren’t enough.”

  “What do you need?” Benio lifts one brow. “I need eyes, I need study partners who will read with me, I need support. Jule,” You point to the four eyed boy. “I need your camera to document this and the confrontation. The people are going to see every bit of this.”

  “Won’t we get in trouble?” 

“For what? Posting on social media? As long as you don’t tag the school, we’ll be fine. It’ll spread on its own. Jule, I need you to be in charge of recording and Sakura,” She looks at you with a hint of sadness in her eyes.

“Bakugou does everything with Mira. But this has to be getting in your way and bothering you. You gave up arguing because you knew we couldn’t oppose it at the time. Sakura, you have to be angry too, right?” She nods. “Then I need you to help Jule with posting it. You and Jule will handle the media. Hansuke, when it’s time, you’ll invite the school to the assembly so everyone can see it.”

  Hansuke, normally a social butterfly, is naturally charismatic. It’s so crazy that he could charm anyone. He’s the perfect guy to convince people. Without another second of delay, Hansuke smiles and nods. He waves his manicured hand. “Anything for you, pretty.”

 “What about me?” Riko’s voice is quiet. She rubs her arm and stares down at her feet. “Do you trust me too, Riko?”

As far as you know, she is going to counseling with the dog hero and has made some progress. However, there are times when she retreats. Now looks like one of those moments. Sometime later you need to see if she’s doing okay. You want to give her space but not so much she gets lost. You don’t know what he did to her, all you can see are the results of it. 

She bites her lip. “I have nothing to do with this project.” 

“No, but because of this and their negligence, Mineta harassed you. They only got rid of him when it came to your expense. There has to be rules against what they did and if there isn’t, let the people decide.”

  Her eyes peer up at you. They’re glossy and scared. “I trust you.”

“Understand, this will take months for justice. We’re taking this to the top, not the principal, not the teachers. No, we’re taking it up with their boss.”

  Jule asks, “Hawks? The commissioner, Hawks?”

“Yep. Going to Nezu does fucking nothing. But Hawks? We need ammo, we need all types of shit. Most of all, I need you to trust me to go in front of this man, the most powerful man in this country with everything I got. It will take months. This isn’t something to just throw at the big guy. No,”

You lean in with the most serious expression. “Even if the project ends before I can begin, I am going to burn this school to the ground.”

“Let’s do this.” Benio smiles and sets Kobeni down on the chair and picks up one of the hero law books.

a/n: the library scene is like Bernadine's from Waiting to Exhale. It fit the moment.

tags:

@js-favnanadoongi , @imas1mpp, @bigchungusdrinksspritecranberry, @luvrluvrr

@moodyhuesworld

[gyupinkys]

CRY SOME MORE- pout some more pt.2

CHOI SEUNGCHEOL X READER

WC: 2K 

WARNINGS: GUN AND KNIFE PLAY, threesome, Cuckolding, exhobitionism, unprotected and protected sex, bondage, begging, possessiveness, edging, face fucking, impact play, very rough sex, this may make you go insane... it made me insane

Being married to Cheol isn’t as bad as you thought. Your day to day consists of sleeping in, forcing Mingyu to cook for you, and bothering Cheol into an inch of his life. You can’t complain. Cheol really tries to make you as happy as possible, often putting his pride aside to appease you, which is exactly what he’s doing now.

“I want to go with you.” you groan, upset that he has the audacity to leave you home and go to paris with Jeonghan. This seems like a honeymoon, not a business trip. 

“Y/N, If you keep this up I’ll start to think you’re getting attached.” 

You scoff. You absolutely are.  “In your dreams, lover boy.”

You begin to plead, giving him your best puppy dog eyes, knowing he’ll fold.

“Fine, go pack your stuff.” he sighs.

You smile, giving him a kiss on the cheek and running up the stairs. Missing the teasing look Jeonghan gives Cheol. 

“You’re so pathetic.” Jeonghan chuckles.

“You’re no better, you literally kill people if they look at your girl the wrong way.” Cheol says with an eye roll, walking upstairs to help you pack.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You didn’t realize Joshua was coming until you walked onto the jet and saw him passed out on the couch. You wouldn’t say you didn’t like him, he’s extremely sweet to you. The issue is you never got over your little crush on him and If Cheol finds out he’ll start whining and pouting and you don’t have time for that. You don’t want to be with Joshua, you love being with Cheol, but damn; that gentleman act gets you everytime. You quickly walk past him and head to the small bedroom at the back of the plane to get some peace of mind, which was rudely interrupted by Cheol throwing himself on top of you. You run your fingers through his hair making him nestle his head into your chest.

“Why didn’t you tell me Joshua was coming?”

“I didn’t think it was important.”

“Oh.” 

“Why? Y/N, I swear if you try something.”

“I would never.”

“Y/N, I mean it when I say no funny business. The guys we’re meeting are not to be messed with.”

“Are you scared?”

“Me? No.”

He’s definitely scared. “I’ll behave. Just because I don’t want you to die.”

“Oh, you suddenly care about me.”

“Ok, I take it back.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You don’t like the vibes this club is emitting. You clutch onto Cheol’s hand harder as he weaves through the crowd with Jeonghan and Joshua. You’re not sure why he brought you in the first place. The VIP sections upstairs are much quieter yet even more scary. The four of you enter a private room and see four men sitting on a couch, their conversation cutting short when you walk in. 

You sit between Joshua and Cheol. As usual Jeonghan does the talking, easily turning the deal in SVT’s favor. 

“Before we do that, whose this dime?” the man you’ve learned as Minho speaks. 

Cheol goes to answer but you quickly cut him off. You don’t need him to speak for you. 

“Hi, Minho. I’m Y/N” you say confidently. 

“What a beautiful name.” The man next to him, Taemin says. 

“Thank you” you smile, feeling Cheol tense next to you, presumably jealous. He needs to cut this shit out. 

“How do you know these guys?” Minho asks.

“I’m Joshua’s girlfriend.” you say with a smile making Joshua choke on air.

“Well, shit.” Jeonghan says under his breath while Cheol stays quiet.

“Well, Joshua. You got yourself a keeper.” Key winks.

“Thanks, man” Joshua grits out.

You tune out the rest of the conversation, thinking about how good Cheol’s going to fuck you tonight to “show you your his”. Typical, yet you love it everytime. Except, when you get back to the hotel he just sits in the armchair across from the bed. He unbuttons the first few buttons of his shirt, rolls up his sleeves and loosens his tie. You sit across from him on the bed waiting for him to speak, but he never does, just typing away on his phone.

“Cheol?”

He looks up at you and raises his eyebrows. “Yes?”

“Are you mad?”

“Why would I be mad? Matter of fact, why are you here instead of with your boyfriend?”

Well this backfired.

A knock of the door cuts off your thoughts, Cheol getting up and letting Joshua in. What is going on?

“Well, here’s your boyfriend.” Cheol says in a monotone voice, looking at his phone again.

You have no words. What are you even supposed to say? 

Joshua walks up to you and gently grabs your chin. “My beautiful girlfriend.” he says with a sweet smile. Woah. 

“You think I don’t know about your little crush on me? If you wanted me so bad you should’ve said something, I could’ve been fucking you this whole time.” He says crawling over you, making your back hit the bed. 

You must be dreaming. What the fuck is happening? Why isn’t Cheol saying anything?

“Cheolie?” you say nervously. 

“What? It’s only right that your boyfriend fucks you to sleep, right?”

He’s being such an ass, but two can play this stupid game. 

“Kiss me, Shua.” 

He obeys, connecting your lips in a heated yet somehow sweet kiss. His lips are so soft, yet you can’t help but compare them to Cheol’s. His are plumper and rounder than Joshua’s, more familiar. “STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM” you internally yell. You thread your fingers through Joshua’s hair and pull, making him groan. He roughly pull’s back and grips your hair twice as hard. 

“Don’t even try to pretend you’re in charge here.” he spits, letting your head fall back. 

Well damn, where did the gentleman go? 

“Coups, let me borrow your tie?” 

He grabs the tie from his hands and ties your wrist together.

“I’m not gonna be as nice to you as your sweet Cheolie. I love to see pretty girls cry.”

He pulls a pocket knife out of his pocket and cuts through your dress. You wish you could see Cheol’s face, but Joshua’s broad shoulders cover your view. 

“What made you say you were mine?” Joshua asks as he begins to grope your chest through your flimsy lace bra. You even wore red to entice Cheol yet-  stop thinking about him. 

“I want to be yours.”

“Oh?” he drags his hands down your body, pulling your panties off and throwing them straight into Cheol’s lap. 

“Y/N, tell me;  Who is this pussy so wet for? Me or him?”

“Him.” you smile mischeviously.

“Always a brat.” Joshua says, grabbing your arms and pulling you to the floor.

“I’m sure you know what to do.”

Your hands fly to his belt only to earn a sharp slap to your face. He harshly grips your chin, “I didn’t give you permission to do it.”

Is everyone in this group annoying? 

“Can I please suck your dick?” 

“That’s more like it. Go ahead.” 

You unzip his slacks and pull him out. He’s hard and leaking a bead of precum that you promptly lick and put the tip in your mouth. Joshua angled you so Cheol could see you. When you try to turn your head to look at him Joshua grabs your head and thrusts all the way down your throat making you gag. 

“Eyes on me, baby.” Cheol say’s with a smirk in his voice. You try to turn your head again just for Joshua to begin thrusting harshly, punishing you for trying to look at Cheol. “Don’t make me ask again.” Cheol says knowing every time you try to turn your head the thrust will only get harder.

“If you look at him I’ll hurt you.” Joshua says in a deceivingly sweet voice. 

You groan around his length, what are you supposed to do? You feel tears of frustration brim at your eyes, the gagging only making the tears begin to flow. 

“Y/N, you can’t even listen to me? I’m starting to think you really want to be Joshua’s.”

“I wouldn’t mind taking her off your hands, I’m sure that pussy is tighter than her throat.”

He pulls you off his cock and throws you on the bed, positioning you to face Cheol. He seems to be suffering as much as you. His hands are harshly gripping the arms of the chair and he’s breathing heavily. You can almost see the jealousy and possessiveness coursing through him. 

“Let's give him a show.” Joshua whispers in your ear, rolling on a condom and rubbing his tip through your folds. You've been so pent up this little stimulation is making you feel like you could cum on the spot. When he begins to fill you up you groan, feeling a sense of relief. You don’t take your eyes off Cheol as Joshua begins harshly thrusting into you making your legs weak. Cheol pulls himself out of his pants and begins to stroke himself. Your mouth begins to water at the thought of sucking him off. You'd be so good for him if he gave you even an ounce of attention.

“This pussy isnt even mine yet I feel possessive over it. I don’t know how you're doing this, bro.”

Joshua picks up his pace making your legs give out. He wraps an arm around your waist and pulls your back to his chest. You feel your orgasm approaching, beginning to squirm.

“That’s enough.” Cheol says, standing up. 

“No, Please I’m so close.” you cry out.

“I said that’s enough.” he responds, pressing the barrel of his gun to Joshua’s head. “Get the fuck off my girl.”

“Partypooper.” Joshua complains, but pulls out. “Go sit in the chair. I want you to watch closely. Maybe you’ll learn a thing or two.”

He looks at you laying on your back on the bed and drags his gun around your body. 

“Why do you think you can fuck my friends? You know, the last girl who did that ended up in a shallow grave. I don’t like sharing. So what makes you so special?”

He pushes the gun into your mouth and presses on your tongue, making it so you can’t answer. “I asked you a question.” he says, pushing harder, making you panic. 

“No answer? Maybe I should kill you too.” He presses the gun further down your throat and pulls the trigger. Holy fuck. You let go of a breath and feel your pussy drip. That was so hot. 

“You should’ve seen your face.” He sadistically laughs.  “On all fours.” 

You scramble into position, looking back at him. He doesn't give you warning before pushing into you. He stretches you more than Joshua, and has the advantage of already knowing your body. He begins brutally pounding you, forcefully arching your back so you can take him deeper. 

“I don’t know what I did to deserve such a slutty wife. You’d fuck anyone, huh?”

“No Cheol. I only want you.”

“That’s clearly not true.” he scoffs. 

“Can I cum, Please?”

“You’re real bold.” 

“Please Cheol. I swear I’ll be good.”

“I’ve heard that so many times, Baby. I don’t believe you.”

“No please” you begin crying. “Please daddy. I just need to cum and I’ll do whatever you say.”

“Daddy? You must really want to cum.”

“Yes, please, please, please.”

He pulls out and cums on your back.  “Cheol” you whine as you get up and begin to pathetically cry. Talk about deja vu…

He pulls you in for a kiss and whispers against your lips. “I told you, next time you want to be a brat, to remember this feeling. Clearly I need to reinforce this lesson ” 

He looks up at Joshua. “You can see yourself out.”

Joshua just smiles and gets up. As he passes your sobbing figure he throws your panties onto your chest. 

“I meant it when I said I like to see pretty girls cry.” 

You look down at your panties to see his cum covering them and dripping off onto your chest.

[httpscomexe]

Runaway 5

Summary: Logan reaches his breaking point when he finds out Scott touched you

(Find What I’m currently writing by checking my pinned post)

Parings: Logan Howlett x Hybrid!Reader

Warnings: (Individual warnings per chapter) This is a dark chapter. Language, blood, violence. This will be a non-con fic starting in future chapters.

Word Count: 4419 (Find all chapters here) CH6

P.S. If you’d like to be tagged, ask in the comments, you also have permission to send an ask, but make sure it is NOT anonymous, so I know your username, don’t worry, I’m scared of confrontation too. But this is a SAFE SPACE where I will not judge. Thank you again.

P.P.S I mean it, this is going to be very violent.

“Good Morning sugar glider.”

“Wade, that is a completely different animal.” You giggle, pouring yourself a glass of lemonade that Logan had bought from the store for you, who, by the way, was currently snoring like a pig on Wade's couch, a fluffy pinkie pie blanket laying over him.

“Still cute…” He mumbles, one side of his lips quirking up as he stays quiet enough so even Logan's dreams can’t hear him speaking to you.

“Wade hush, you know Logan doesn’t like it when you flirt…” You whisper, taking a big sip from your glass and scrunching your nose at the sour taste.

“Is he your boyfriend?”

“No.”

“Then it shouldn’t bother him.”

“Wade, he just cares…” You mumble, and Logan stretches on the couch, sitting up, and immediately looking down at his body, searching for you, but looking behind him when he can’t find you.

“Bambi?” He groans as he sits up, his age showing. You skip over to him like an excited child waiting for their birthday present, grabbing your hairbrush from the table.

“Goodmornin Logan!” You say excitedly, sitting on your knees and heels next to him on the couch.

“Good morning Bambi…” He yawns a little, draping his arms over the back of the couch as you wiggle the hairbrush in front of him.

“Well.” Wade says from the kitchen, making your ear twitch as you look back at him. “I have some important business to tend to…” You watch as he shoves a cupcake from God knows where into his mouth. “So, you and your guard dog get to watch the house. I’d say Al could, but you know. She isn’t the best at watching.”

“I can hear you, you fucking asshole!”

“She does a great job at listening though.”

“Where are you going?” You wonder, and you feel Logan's hand suddenly resting on your thigh.

“Just some uh… unfinished business. I’ll be back tonight.” He nods at Logan, sort of in a ‘calm the fuck down’ way. You turn back around to look at Logan, and his eyes drift down to you, his mouth closing as if mid sentence, and you grip the hair brush a little tighter in your palm.

“Okay…” You look back at Wade, who’s patting himself for something. “Well we’ll see you later then… Bye Wade…” You curl up a little against Logan, and he tries to take the hairbrush from you, but you snatch your hand away and give him an angry look, making his eyebrows quirk, a smirk rising to his face that tells you he’s unimpressed.

“Bye you two…” He passes by you two on the couch and makes his way for the door, swinging it open before closing it behind him.

“Let me see the brush honey.”

“No.” You shoot back almost immediately and you watch as his chest moves up and down with a deep breath. “Why’re you so mean to Wade?”

“I’m anasshole to everyone, Bambi.”

“Especially Wade.”

“Just hand me the brush, we can talk about this later.” He holds his hand out again, and you hand it to him, a frown on your face. “Come on, down.” He points at the floor between his legs, and you get down between them, his hands automatically moving over your hair with the brush gliding through your tangles.

“Why can’t we just talk about it now?”

“Baby, I just woke up.” You hear a growl come from the back of his throat.

“So did I, but I wanna hear about it.”

“Well that’s just too bad.”

“Logan-”

“No.”

“Logan I- Ow!” His hand suddenly grips onto a bundle of your hair and he pulls it, making you follow the pain to sit up more on your knees, your back leaning further against the couch between his legs and you look at him as he leans forward.

“I said no. Did you forget what no means?” He growls, gripping your hair tighter when you don’t answer. “I asked a fucking question.”

“Yes… Wait. No.” You whimper, tears brimming your eyes as your fingers wrap around his wrist, trying to urge him to let go.

“Then what part of it do you not understand?” He moves his hand to wrap more around your hair, pulling even harder, and it felt like your scalp would be bleeding.

“I’m sorry-” Your voice shakes, fingers now clawing at his wrist. “Please, I won’t ask again…” You start to cry, hiccuping a little.

“If you ask again, I’m going to do much worse than this…” He warns, letting you back down, and loosening his grip on your hair, but he keeps holding it, knowing you would try to crawl away.

“M’sorry…” You whisper, and you feel the brush move through your hair again, his hand moving away from your re-tangled locks, some tears running down your cheeks.

“Don’t do it again…” He growls quietly, and Wade's bedroom door opens before Althea comes out and heads straight for the kitchen fridge, feeling around in the back of it.

“Where the fuck are my cupcakes? I bought two…”

You were lucky. Getting out of the house to hang out with Ororo. She had stopped by the house and knocked on the door just before Logan went to the bathroom to take a shower, and she wondered if you’d be able to hang out, just you and her since Jean canceled on her, which she had apparently expected.

“I mean yea, if it’s just you.” Logan told her, looking back at you with a nod of approval, followed by you quickly tying on your shoes and springing to your feet with a big smile on your face to move next to Ororo.

“I’ll have her back around when the mall closes.” She promised, and you gave Logan a big hug before following her to her car, hopping in the passenger seat, then you watched cars fly by on the way to the mall.

“Alright, see anything you liked?” Ororo comes up to you, some sweaters in her hands that she planned on buying as she watches you look at some clothes.

“No…”

“You’re being quiet.” She chuckles, gently flicking your nose.

“Sorry, usually Logan goes shopping for me, I’m not used to it.”

“Well, are there any clothes you’ve been wanting that Logan won’t get for you?” She walks backwards for a moment, urging you to follow her before turning around to walk straight to the counter and buy her arms full of clothing.

“No… I haven’t been here.”

“Jesus, that asshole keeps you locked up like a puppy in kennel training.” She mumbles, smiling at the cashier as he rings up her items.

“He’s not an asshole…”

“Oh yes he is Bambi.” She takes out her wallet to pay. “Are you hungry?” She turns to look at you as she hands her card to the man behind the counter.

“A little.” She takes her card back as the machine beeps, and she takes her bags.

“Well, let's go find the food court.” She walks ahead of you, and you do a little jog to make it back to her side, your eyes scanning the different people in the mall.

It made you a little self conscious, maybe even a little uncomfortable. The looks you got from normal people. Looking down on you for the big deer ears on the sides of your head and the tip of the deer tail that was peeking out of the sweater you’d stolen from Logan's clothes.

You were getting weird looks from children for fucks sake, and it only made you feel worse as you stayed close to Ororos side.

“Hey, you alright Bambi?” She wonders,wrapping her arm around your shoulder, and she follows your awkward gaze, your arms crossed embarrassingly over your stomach.

“I don’t like being here.”

“Hey, this isn’t a mutant free space, it says mutants are allowed here.”

“Yea, but everyone still stares…”

“I’d stare too.” She pauses, and you look up at her. “You’re unique. It’s not often you see a hybrid in public.” She tells you, holding you closer. “Especially one that's considered a mammal. Plus, you’re with me, so people know you’re not a bad one. Also did I mention.” She leads you into the food court, the smell of pretzels and pizza smacking you in the face. “Hybrids, they aren’t nearly as hated as mutants.” She shrugs, leading you to one of the little sandwich stands. “And that’s because they’re cute.” She boops your nose, letting go of your shoulders, and you both stand in the line.

“They are very cute.” Your ear twitches at the familiar voice, and her arm wraps around your shoulder. “Didn’t know you’d be here.” Jean smiles down at you.

“You canceled?” Ororo looks over at her.

“Yea, then I canceled what I canceled for and your location said you were here anyways. Guess you replaced me pretty easily, huh?” She jokes, and you look down at her other hand to see she was attached to Scott, and he nods at you as a hi.

“Did I hurt your feelings? I hope I did.” Ororo teases, and Jean lets go of both you and Scott to stand on the other side of Ororo, Scott moving a little closer to you, and the line only moves forward by a few people. Why was it so busy in the sandwich line of all lines?

“Never thought I’d see you away from Logan.” Scott tells you, quiet enough so the other two girls couldn’t hear your conversation.

“Well, we're not glued together.”

“Oh I know, he just likes to keep you in his pocket is all…” You open your mouth to argue back, but he was right. “Mhm, that’s what I thought.” His hand reaches up, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

“I’m not arguing with that…”

“On my side? Or his side.”

“I’m definitely not taking sides.” You chuckle a little, and he shrugs, a smile forming on his lips.

“Scared to take mine?”

“Scared to leave his…” You admit, and he tilts his head.

“Are you okay…?”

“What do you guys think?” Jean suddenly interrupts, looking over Ororo to find both of your eyes. “Or were you not listening?”

“We weren’t listening.” You both say at once.

“Do you guys wanna go to the spa? Cause if not you can both go look around the mall and hang out while me and Ororo do.” She asks, and Ororo nudges her a little.

“Yea I don’t wanna go to a spa.” Your tail tucks a little, the last thing you wanted was some random person touching you.

“And obviously I don’t” Scott shrugs, and you all finally make it to the front of the line.

“What can I get for you four?” Some teenager asks, looking at Jean first.

“Can I get the turkey special?”

“And for me the ham special.”

“I'll take a chicken.” Scott answers last, and you don’t say anything.

“Bambi, what do you like?” Jean asks you, and you stare at the menu.

“She’ll have a Cubano, I think she’d love that.” Scott tells the kid, and you internally thank him.

“Alright, that's one turkey special, one ham special, a chicken, and then one Cubano?” Ororo nods, and she takes out her wallet again, sticking the card in the paying machine and taking it back out when it beeps, then she hands the card to you.

“Here, you and Scott go have some fun and explore while Jean and I go to the spa once we get the sandwiches.” You take the card, mouthing a thank you before putting it in the back of your phone and the four of you step aside.

Once the sandwiches are ready, Jean and Ororo say bye before heading to the spa, Scott leading you in a different direction. You knew Logan wouldn’t be happy if he knew Scott was there, that he would be absolutely pissed if he knew. But you also didn’t want the three of them to know that. They were already worried about his possessiveness as is, and the last thing you wanted was him keeping you from hanging out with them at all. He’d be mad at Ororo too, thinking that she lied to him.

Again…

“So, what do you wanna check out first?” Scott wonders, making it his turn to wrap his arm around your shoulders.

“Um… I don’t know what there is.”

“Well, I could show you one of the dress stores, maybe you could try some on for me?” He offers, bringing his hand down to take yours after looking back to make sure Jean was gone. You look down at your hands, and your heart skips a beat. It felt as if Logan was watching you, like the second your hands touched, some invisible fucking flame just went through your body and told you to fucking sock Scott in the face. But you liked Scott, he was trying to include you, trying to make you feel special.

“Sure!” You try to smile, trying to seem excited and not at all cracked out nervous.

“Awesome, I’m just gonna head to the restroom, then I’ll get back to you, okay?” He lets go of your hand as you nod, and he walks into one of the restrooms that come up. Another man enters almost immediately after him with a covering of his head, and your ears twitch.

He smelled familiar.

Of course he wasn’t gonna let you go to the mall with Ororo without some sort of protection. Aka, him watching over you.

“Now where are you going? You’re supposed to be helping with this.” Althea waves over at the half finished desk, some screws in the wrong holes.

“I know.” He growls out, and Althea ‘looks’ at him (the wall) through her blind glasses at his tone. “I just want to check on Bambi.”

“Let the damned girl enjoy herself for once damnit.” She talks to the wall as Logan throws on his thick flannel, grabbing his truck's keys from the coffee table.

“She won’t even know I’m there Althea.” He growls again, then tosses the door open to leave, the sound of some wood falling to the floor the last he hears as Althea calls out ‘motherfucker.’

He was watching you. A hat pulled low over his head. Yea, he was a little pissed when Jean and Scott suddenly showed up, but he calmed down as he heard the surprise in Ororos voice. She didn’t expect Jean to still suddenly show up. And she definitely didn’t expect Scott.

He watched as Scott ordered for you, a smile being brought on your face that made him want to strangle you both at the same time. You shouldn’t be able to smile at anyone that way except him. Then he stood up as you all separated, you moving with Scott.

Then he touched you.

He put his fucking arm around you, and Logan felt his rage run through him like a freight train, his fists clenching at his sides, claws coming out just a little before going back into his skin. If he had stared any harder, his veins would be popping out of his neck.

He fucking touched you.

And it wasn’t just his arm around your shoulders. No.

He fucking grabbed your hand.

And you didn’t do anything about it.

He was fucking pissed.

He walks past you, making sure the hat stays covering his face to stay unrecognized as he swings open the bathroom door, letting it close behind him as he moves to the side, letting another man leave the bathroom. Leaving the two of them alone…

The clink of metal and the sound of the AC is the only thing that can be heard in the bathroom as Logan waits for Scott to leave the stall. And once he does, he immediately freezes, watching as Logan takes the hat off his head, setting it down on a sink.

“Howlett?” Scotts voice shakes a little. Logan hadn’t even done anything yet, but just him being there was enough to send waves of fear through his body for some reason, prickles of goosebumps shooting through his arms. If he was a dog, he was sure the hair on the back of his neck would be standing up.

“Scott…” He growls, slowly stalking towards him, and Scott only takes steps back, his hands instinctively being thrown up in defense.

“Wanna fucking explain that shit?”

“I didn’t do anything.”

“Don’t fucking lie to me…” His claws suddenly shoot out, his fists clenching tight as his nails dig into his skin.

“I didn’t-”

Logan lunges forward, his claws pointing out in front of him, but they just stab into the wood of the thin stall doors. Scott was fast enough to close it and lock it.

“Open the fucking door!” He growls out, ripping the metal extensions out of the stall before banging the side of his fist on the flat surface, the entire wall of stalls shaking with the force.

“Calm the fuck down!”

“Don’t you fucking tell me to calm down!” He growls back, kicking at the stall and the hinges creak a little, the wall vibrating again, threatening to fall over.

Meanwhile, you were outside, your ears perking up at the sound of yelling and banging, frozen in place as you debated running in there.

“Open this fucking stall door RIGHT now!” Logan's fist clenched back down at his sides. “Or I swear on your motherfucking life I will tear this cheap piece of shit of it’s hinges and my fucking claws will find their way into your fucking throat…-” He growls out, some spit coming out of his mouth and landing on the door in front of him.

“I’m not fucking coming out after you just-”

That was all he needed to say. Logan suddenly punches the door, hard, pounding a hole through the cheap wood before punching the other side as well, making two holes big enough for him to reach through them and tear at the door, Scott taking the time he’s distracted to hop over the stall, using the urinal as a ladder to get over the side of it.

Logan grips the sides of the stall with his fists, using barely a little of his fueled up adrenaline to rip the door off more than just the hinges, the wood stuck in the tile floor ripping out a little. He looks inside of the stall after throwing the door aside, watching as it crumples off parts of the tile wall and they clatter to the ground.

Scott knew it would be pointless to fight back, considering Logan would just heal right back up.

“Where the fuck did you go you fucking pussy?” Logan moves one stall to the right, Scott being quiet as he locks the stall to the left of the destroyed one, before crawling over the wall again, slowly making his way further and further to the right. But all he was doing was pumping Logan full of more anger. He was sure to do more than just hurt Scott at this point.

He swings open all of the stalls to the left, some of them flying off their hinges as he kicks them open before he storms over to the ones on the right.

“I’m not playing these fucking games…” He mumbles, going into one of the stalls with a door and closing it, locking it behind him.

Then he kicks at the wall itself, next to the door. And Scott freezes up in the corner of the handicap stall he was cowering away in.

He kicks it again, and the entire wall of stalls seems to creak as they all threaten to fall. But he kicks it again, and this time he hears the wall holding it up crack as the bars come loose.

Then he kicks it again.

The loud crash was enough for you to make up your mind. A few heads turning and walking towards the bathroom but you’re faster as you swing the door open and force it shut and locked behind you, just in time to see Scott be thrown from one side of the bathroom to another, the force throwing him unseen by you as a wall blocks your sight. Scotts back crashing into the wall and you hear his bones crack as he comes in contact with the wall, and pained groan leaving his lips as your feet move on their own to run up to him, but a large hand grabs your shoulder and throws you to the side, your own back hitting a different wall.

“Get the fuck out…” Logan's voice growls, and the fear you were feeling before suddenly clicks in your mind, but you don’t move as you watch him crouch down, grabbing the collar of Scotts shirt before picking him up to his feet and slamming him against the wall.

“Bambi-” Scott groans out, trying to make you leave, but Logan's entire hand suddenly grabs Scotts’ face, lifting his head off the wall before harshly slamming it back against the wall, some blood spurting around the white tile, and your eyes widen in fear.

“Get the FUCK out!” Logan looks down at you, and you flinch at his tone, still unmoving. Then he lets go of Scott, dropping him to the floor before approaching you now. He bends down, his hand gripping around your ear, but just as he’s about to pick you up, he growls and lets go, suddenly tumbling to the floor and Scott grabs your hand, lifting you up quickly and you lose your balance for a moment before catching yourself.

“Get out…” Scott tells you, and he screams, turning back towards Logan as three claws are suddenly poking through the flesh of his arm, high enough so you can see the outline of the three tendrils through Scotts skin. “AH!” He screams louder, and Logan throws him again, pulling his claws out of Scotts skin and blood drips and spurts from his arm, spilling onto the floor. “GET OUT!” Scott screams again, but he’s met with Logan grabbing his shirt, slamming him against the exit, his fist colliding with Scott's face a few times before he grabs his shirt and slams him against it again, then he backs up and kicks his stomach, Scott hurling up blood as it drips down his skin and the door suddenly flies open, sending Scott flying to the middle of the open mall, some people screaming as they quickly move out of the way and watch in terror as Logan stalks back over to Scott, you peeking from inside of the bathroom still.

You stare down at Scott who’s curled up in pain on the floor, the meat on his jaw torn open from the force of Logan’s punches, the crack in his bone visible as his jaw hangs slack, his lips apart, some teeth obviously missing and fallen to the floor; covered in blood and coating his face with a mixture of spit and his vitals.

“Bambi what the fuck-!” Ororo grabs you and pulls you back a little, standing in front of you like a shield suddenly.

You keep staring over her shoulder, watching as Logan digs his claws into Scotts side.

He didn’t have enough strength now in his body to bother moving. The pain in his jaw was unbearable, like someone had stuck a thousand needles into his throbbing muscles before punching his mandible and breaking each pinpoint, spreading the little pins throughout his face. It was already bruising, swelling red and visibility throbbing, and he screams in agony as he tries to close his teeth, biting down on the numbness of his cheek, but the scream only brings him more pain, the opening of his broken jaw sending fluctuating pain through his skin, and it made him feel light headed and cold.

He barely even notices it when Logan starts attacking his sides, digging his claws into his abdomen before pulling them out and stuffing them back into him over and over again.

People scream in the crowd, some people tearing their phones out of their pockets and shouting things like ‘somebody help him’ and ‘is that Wolverine?’

Oh yea…

He wasn’t brought into public yet. It wasn’t exactly easy to ask the press to make a video telling the entire world that yes, Logan is dead. But happy birthday, we got another.

Anyways.

His claws continue their assault, stabbing in and out of Scott until his flesh is torn apart and obscene noises blur out the gasps and words of stand-by-ers.

Obviously Ororo wasn’t stupid enough to help Scott. Logan would rip them both apart. She just half hopes that Jean would come around and get into the fuckers mind.

But no, they all instead watch as he tears Scott apart, piece by piece as gummy like chunks of his large intestine fly out of his body on Logan's claws and land somewhere else on the tile. It wasn’t even just murder anymore, it was full fledged hatred.

Scott was already dead, he was lying under Logan, twitching as parts of his organs are strewn about, Logan still savagely tearing into his stomach now and parts of his chicken sandwich are ripped from his stomach, leaking and coated with blood down what’s left of his skin.

“Logan!” You cry out, fearful eyes of innocent people landing on you, Ororos hand holding you back as Logan's claw digs into Scotts chest. “LOGAN!” You scream again, this time pushing past Ororo who tries to grab at you, missing by just an inch as you run to Logan's side, but just as you’re about to grab his arm just before it plunges back into Scotts chest…

Jeans finally shows up, hurling herself at you before you can touch the feral animal ripping into poor Scott like an actual wolverine would rip into a rabbit, easily tearing flesh and ripping through bone.

His hand leaves Scotts chest again and he stands up, looking down at you and Jean, Jean lying on top of you protectively, something pulsating in his hands.

“Logan-” He squeezes, blood exploding and spattering Jeans face and part of your face in Scotts red blood. Then his eyes roll a little, as if dizzy, and you look over to see Jean concentrating, relaxing only a little when Logan falls to the floor with a thump…

🏷️: @shybluebirdninja @atomicheartbroken @hazydespair @kindazombie @themaidenofdarkness @rebeccawinters

[pagannatural]

2.17 Heart

- this episode can’t really be called underrated but it makes me insane in a special and specific way that needs airing

-Dean is cleaning their guns and geeking out about how cool werewolves are, how they haven’t seen one since they were kids, and how good it is to know how to handle the situation, and Sam is teasing him. This callback to their shared childhood is important.

-Dean asks Sam their next step the way a teacher asks their student because Sam is still learning hunting from Dean. Sam answers correctly, looking like he’s trying not to smile and looks down and then up at Dean. He looks like he’s flirting. He loves seeing Dean happy.

- Madison tells the brothers that the victim was the kind of guy to hit on everyone in a five mile radius after a few scotches, you know the type, and Sam at first smiles knowingly. But then he looks over at Dean, who’s smiling his fuck-me smile at Madison, and his face falls. “Yeah, I do, actually,” he says.

Dean’s interest in Madison (and other women in general) really bothers him in this moment.

- Dean tells Madison someone needs to stay with her in case the werewolf shows up. The moment she leaves the room Sam tells Dean “you go, I’ll stay” with this expression that seems very serious, not like he’s just wanting to be the one who spends time with the pretty woman.

They decide to settle this the old fashioned way which is rock-paper-scissors (ro-sham-bo). Another callback to their childhood. Sam wins because Dean always chooses scissors which is honestly fascinating to me— I would have guessed Dean would pick rock because it’s the solid strong masculine option and because Sam would choose paper, but of course Dean chooses the tool, the blades. Sam grasps Dean’s arm after and his hand lingers. Again, he does not seem to have done this out of any interest in Madison, it seems like he just doesn’t want to witness Dean with her.

-This is not the face of a man who likes this woman

It reminds me of how he acted around Sarah In Provenance. He has to perform liking her for Dean, but he never shows any signs of genuine interest. Madison even dumps a basket of delicates onto the table in front of him to fold and he scrunches up his face and moves to the couch.

- Sam observes that Madison is smart and independent and asks her why she was with a stalker, and she answers that it’s not like he introduced himself like Hi I’m possessive and controlling and I like to punch people. She also says he’s wanted by the police, and that she was too insecure to leave until she realized she could take control of her life.

Madison and Sam are set up as direct parallels. She ends up being a monster without even knowing and without intending any harm, which is what Sam fears. Also, the way she’s describing her ex-boyfriend sounds a lot like Dean: possessive, controlling, likes punching people, wanted by the police. I think Dean has a lot of very redeemable qualities and for the most part he treats Sam very kindly, but he is all those things. It’s also how Sam would describe John, who he got away from by taking control of his life. The difference is that Sam actually wants to be with Dean.

- Dean kills the first werewolf in this episode. The werewolf is dying in the street and Dean stands over him and watches him turn back into a scared and confused man right before he dies. Dean obviously doesn’t enjoy seeing a man lose his life, and it complicates his earlier excitement over hunting a werewolf. The grown-up version of this hunt isn’t fun any more.

- Dean can see how Sam cares about Madison because he relates to her, and the way he watches Sam is so tender and protective. When Madison hugs Sam, Dean watches them with such bittersweet understanding

and then excuses himself very obviously so that Sam and Madison can fuck. Which they do. Which is just wild.

Because Sam decides to have sex with the first woman since Jessica because 1) Dean tells him to and 2) he sees this woman as the version of himself that gets to live without becoming a monster

- when Sam knocks frantically on his door, Dean opens up, knowing right away something is wrong and reassuring Sam that they’ll find her. The way that Sam runs straight to Dean’s door when he’s scared and needs help and Dean is right there without another thought is very romantic tropey.

-Sam yells at Dean because Dean’s willing to kill Madison without question but unwilling to kill Sam no matter what he does including murder. Dean looks a little jostled to be confronted by this, but I think to him it’s just so clear that Sam is a special and specific category from the rest of humanity and creation that he doesn’t see or doesn’t care about the hypocrisy. Sam is the center of his universe and his entire system of values. Everyone on earth or in hell is either Sam or Not Sam. It’s funny because Sam is like this about Dean too, but he just accepts it.

-Dean explains the situation to Madison calmly and honestly. It’s the decent thing to do, and also the difficult thing. He’s not cold or numb to the work, but he is able to handle it and keep his head as long as it’s not about Sam.

-Madison asks Sam to be the one to kill her and Dean watches Sam struggle. He’s been watching Sam carefully and protectively this entire episode.

-She uses language so similar to the language Sam uses to beg Dean to kill him—asking for help, saying she wants it to be him who does it, “I’m asking you to save me.” She tries to hand Sam the gun.

Dean gets up at this point and stands behind Madison, his eyes on Sam as he moves, and slowly takes the gun out of her hands. This shifts the focus off Madison and solely onto the brothers for the remainder of the episode.

His eyes stay on Sam’s as he does this, and Sam is somehow looking up at Dean pleadingly. His romantic interest is begging him for help with tears in her eyes in what will be the last moments of her life and Sam is staring at Dean behind her.

The sexual relationship between Sam and Madison is explicitly compared to Dean and Sam’s relationship. It wasn’t necessary for the werewolf character to be a woman who Sam sleeps with—the very first woman that he is with since Jessica. She’s the stand-in for Sam in this case, and Sam is put in Dean’s shoes.

The brothers go into the other room and Dean assures Sam he doesn’t have to do this, that he’ll handle it. He wants to take care of Sam and spare him this, just like he has since they were children, but he can’t this time. Sam feels he has to because she asked him, and asks Dean for the gun.

It’s a very intentional choice that Sam won’t do this for Madison until he has to ask Dean, and that in the end it’s a conversation between the brothers that forms the emotional tension and climax of the episode. Dean did what Sam needed him to do by being the one to give him the choice: let me protect you from this or do it yourself. Before, the choice was more about Madison. Now it’s about Sam and Dean’s relationship.

- Sam looks back at Dean before he walks away, like a frightened child who needs help because he really doesn’t want to do this, but he knows it’s the right thing to do as a hunter. In doing this, Sam has played out the two things from Madison that he wants from Dean, that Dean can never give him— Dean will never let their relationship become physical, and he will never kill Sam.

The camera stays on Dean’s face as the gun goes off and the episode ends. Dean can’t save Sam from this, he can’t protect him from one of the responsibilities that comes with their lives as hunters. He’s terrified that he won’t be able to save Sam at all. The days when he could take care of Sam and shield him are over, and they both have to leave that part of their childhood behind. It’s not that Dean can’t save Sam in the end, because at the end of all of this their love for each other is what saves the world. It’s that their innocence can’t survive what’s coming. They have to grow up and face the realities of their lives. Their incestuous love for each other is one of those realities, but they aren’t there yet.

[ihave-atummyache]

i was never there

bang chan one shot/imagine

SFW but some allusions to NSFW activities.

toxic relationship! toxic!chan toxic!reader

summary: to everyone’s disapproval, you and chan just cant seem to leave one another alone.

1.2k words

Chan knows that the two of you breaking up was for the best. Your relationship was unstable and toxic, borderline obsessive. You both had become distant from important things in your life because all you cared about was each other.

If he knows that then why is he feeling so guilty about having someone else in his bed? Why does he feel guilty that it isn’t you in some foreign country with him instead of some girl he met at a bar? Why has he only been able to write the worst heart broken lyrics that he has ever thought of?

Despite his better judgement, after his hookup leaves, he sits up and grabs his phone. He unlocks it and instantly opens social media, hoping that you had posted something, posted anything, just so he could see your face.

He feels like he’s going crazy. He checks your social media at least 10 times a day. He doesn’t care if he’s the first view, he just needs to see you. He opens your profile and sees you posted a story and of course he opens it.

13 s ago

He chews his bottom lip as he analyzes the photo you had posted. It looked like you were having brunch and mimosas but that isn’t what bothered him. What bothered him was the fact that there was somebody sitting at the seat across from you.

There was another plate and another glass but the chair was empty, something you had purposely done to try to maintain your privacy, he assumes.

Maybe it’s the drinks he had earlier in the night or the post nut high but something makes him open his texts and message you, despite every fiber in his brain telling him not to.

Who are you with?

Why would he say that? Now he probably looks insane. But your response is almost instant, not even a minute later.

it’s almost 5 am over there. why are u up?

He chuckles at his phone. You’re right, it’s 4:47am where he is but he can’t help his stomach doing a flip at the thought that you know exactly where in the world that he is. It makes him feel slightly less crazy that you seem to have been watching him just as much as he has been watching you.

Keeping tabs on me now? He types the message and sends it before he thinks too much about it. This is the first time the two of you have talked in almost a month and he feels like he’s getting an adrenaline high.

Chan stands from the bed and heads to his bathroom before turning the shower on and staring at his phone as he waits for the water to heat up.

ik YOU aren’t talking about keeping tabs on anyone. somehow you see everything i post within a minute of it being posted. care to explain? He can sense your sassy attitude through the screen and smirks down at his phone.

I can’t miss you?

Risky. Risky reply and he knows it but its all or nothing at this point.

He sends the message before he can think too hard about it. He sees you’re typing then the bubble disappears. This happens a few times before he finally decides to get into the shower.

A few countries away, you’re staring down at your phone, debating how you should reply.

“I fucked up,” you glance up at your coworker, a new friend that you had made. She had listened to you rant and rant about your ex boyfriend and it had actually brought the two of you pretty close.

“What happened?” She raises an eyebrow at you as she takes another sip of mimosa. you let out a sigh, running a hand through your hair before sliding your phone across the table to her. She reads the messages quickly before shaking her head in disbelief.

“He is fucking insane. Are you going to reply?” her words linger in the air for a minute before you grab your phone and read over the messages again.

“Should I even reply? This is so toxic. I’m feeding into him. Fuck!” You drag your hand down your face, frustrated and the waitress returns to your table at the perfect time.

“Can we get another bottle of champagne?” You ask with a polite smile and she nods before walking away.

“Y/n, it’s 11 in the morning,” your new friend eyes you from across the table and you shrug.

“I’ve officially been driven to drinking. I just need to get drunk and then I’ll go home and fall asleep then I’ll wake up and text him back,” you nod at her and she chuckles but lets you continue drinking anyways. Your phone vibrates again on the table and you flip it over, Chan had texted you again.

“What did he say?” Your friend already knows who it is without you having to say a word. You lean forward and unlock your phone and your heart drops at the message.

Baby, I need you. I miss you. Come to the show in Seoul.

You choke on air and start coughing before sliding your phone to your friend so she can read the messages. Her jaw drops and just as she hands your phone back, a notification pops up at the top of your screen; an incoming call from ‘Christopher Bahng’.

Without thinking you answer the call, excusing yourself from the table and stepping onto the patio, right next to your table so your friend can still see you.

“Chris…” you breathe his name out, it feels like a stab to your chest when you hear him let out a breath on the other side.

“I’ve missed hearing you say my name. I miss you so much, baby. Did you see my message?” His voice is slightly slurred over the phone and you recognize the influence that alcohol probably has over this entire interaction but honestly, you don’t even care.

“I saw it. Chris I don’t think that’s a good idea-”

“I don’t care if it’s a good idea or not. I just need to see you. I’m going to lose my fucking mind if I don’t get to hold you soon,” his voice is desperate and you can hear how overcome with emotions he is.

“We aren’t together anymore. This is exactly why. We aren’t healthy for each other, baby. You know that,” the nickname slips from your mouth like a habit and you immediately gulp when you realize what you said.

“I don’t care. I don’t care about anything if you aren’t at my side,” his confession just further nails it into your head that the two of you aren’t good for each other. You chew on your lip, pulling your sweater tighter around yourself.

“Fine.” Before you realize it, you have agreed to see him, just one more time. This will be the final time, your final goodbye.

Or the cycle will start over and you’ll be back in the endless toxicity that you two have been in for a long time.

“God, I love you so much, y/n,” his voice is raspy and you can tell he’s getting tired.

“I know, Chris. Send me two tickets so I can bring my friend since you ruined our brunch,” you chuckle and you hear him laugh on the other end.

“Yes ma’am,” he replies and you feel your phone vibrate, probably the notification that he just sent you the tickets.

[starboy-sirius]

may 7 & 8 | allure & silk | @jegulus-microfic | 1105 words

James Potter is magnetic. 

It’s clear as day, as the sky is blue, that James Potter is truly like no other. The way he walks through the corridors of Hogwarts minding his own business, laughing with Remus and Peter, roughhousing with Sirius, one arm wrapped tightly around his shoulder. People come up to him with bright smiles and enthusiastic waves and James responds to them in kind, referring to them by name and asking how their family is. He knows little tidbits of information about their lives and he makes them feel good about themselves as he remembers it, making them feel like he cares. 

The way he moves on a broom is stunning, the allure so strong that even those repelled by Quidditch come to watch all of Gryffindor’s games just to get a glimpse of the wind in his hair, his determined face as he scores yet another ten points, the flex of his thigh muscles as he clings to the wood.

He’s breathtaking, a sight to behold. The crowd chants his name like a long forgotten god, worshipping his every move as he waves to them. As if he’s the sun personified, lighting up their dark world with his effortless charm.

And yet, in the dark of his bed, curtains pulled tightly and spelled shut, he doesn’t feel bright like the sun, doesn’t feel important. Truly, he feels like he’s a ticking time bomb just waiting for the moment that people realise he isn’t good enough, that he doesn't shine quite as bright as they expect him to. He feels like an imposter. 

The only person who makes him feel like he’s worthy of love and affection, of any sort of worship, is Regulus Black. 

His best friend's brother. 

It makes him feel endlessly guilty as he spends his nights wrapped up in the Astronomy Tower with Regulus, naked bodies curled around each other as Regulus kisses every inch of his golden, toned body. It’s an entirely new kind of worship, one that runs bone deep and lights his entire body on fire. Sirius is but a thought very far in the back of his mind until Regulus is casting cleaning charms, pressing delicate kisses onto his eyelids, his nose, and all over his face. He’ll end with one on his lips, deep and passionate and James thinks he might drown in the abundance of emotions Regulus makes him feel. 

And fuck it. If Regulus makes James happy then who is he to deny himself a chance at happiness? Doesn’t he deserve it? He spends all his time catering to other people, trying his hardest to do what’s best for others and helping them that he barely ever thinks of himself. 

Well, this time he’s going to do something for himself. 

James leans in to press a tender kiss to the soft skin of Regulus’ neck where it meets his shoulder and breathes in deeply, bracing himself. Regulus, who is sitting in between James’ legs with his back to James’ chest, tenses as he senses the oncoming conversation. He keeps his head forward where they’re looking at the night sky, the view perfect from the Astronomy Tower. 

“I want to tell him,” James announces quietly, pressing another kiss to his neck. 

Regulus swivels around and looks at him with wide eyes, hope burning dangerously within. “You do?”

James nods, a smile growing on his face as one does on Regulus’, but because Regulus was taught to expect the worst growing up, his face turns sombre. “What changed your mind?”

It has been a problem between them for a while now, James wanting to wait before telling Sirius about them. He isn’t even sure what he’s waiting for, which bothered (read: infuriated) Regulus because he couldn’t fathom why James wouldn’t want to tell his best friend. He thought that James was insecure about their relationship, embarrassed about him. Needless to say it caused a few arguments, but James was adamant about telling Sirius at the right time. 

James looks at Regulus now and thinks that he wants the entire castle to know that this boy is his. “I realised that you’re the only person that I feel like I can truly be myself around. I never have to pander to any expectation, never have to worry about whether I’m being too much or not enough. I can just be. And I’ve been observing the way I act with others, always trying to make sure they’re happy, and I just thought: why can’t I focus on making myself happy? And you? You make me happy, so why wouldn’t I want to tell everyone?”

He shrugs afterwards as if he hasn’t just said one of the most romantic things Regulus has ever heard, and the latter surges forward to press a heated kiss to his lips, twisting so that he’s sat in James’ lap facing him. James takes the change in position in his stride, pulling Regulus in by his hips and pressing their bodies tightly together. He accepts the tongue that swipes at his bottom lip and opens his mouth, groaning when Regulus expertly licks into his mouth. 

James runs a hand down to Regulus’ arse, dipping his fingers into his trousers and moaning gutturally when he feels the hint of silk and lace underneath. Regulus smirks against his lips. “I thought you might like that.”

“You’re going to be the death of me.”

Regulus hums. “Nope, but Sirius might be.” He reconsiders his words after James pulls away and sends him a wounded look. “I’m joking, James. He’ll be fine.”

“But what if he isn't?” James whispers, pinching his eyebrows together. “What if he feels betrayed that we didn’t trust him enough to tell him straight away? He’s my best friend.”

“And he’s my brother. That’s way worse when you think about it, but I’m not worried. He’ll strop for maybe a day or two and then he’ll demand to be our flower girl. You know how he is,” Regulus soothes, uncharacteristically gentle with his words. James loves these soft moments almost as much as the biting ones. 

James sends him a coy smile. “You thinking of marrying me, Black?”

Regulus rolls his eyes. “In your dreams, Potter.”

He doesn’t inform Regulus that he does in fact dream of marrying him. He thinks he’ll cross that bridge once they’ve told Sirius. For now he pulls a squirming Regulus back into his lap and kisses him silly, for if James is the sun then Regulus is the star of his universe, lighting up the sky when James doesn’t have the power to do so. 

[asherisawkward]

I found Luz not caring about the demon realms history annoying. I get it. Some of it was made up, but most of it wasn't, just why the crusade was started. It seems a lot of the history she got was through word of mouth.

You figure a fan of fantasy would be excited to learn the history and culture of a magical realm, not just magic. I'm surprise a lot more demons and witches didn't get fed up with her. The only thing who seemed to have anything against it was Hunter, but I could be remembering it all wrong. Sorry if this comes off as a rant.

I absolutely get what you mean!! Luz, from what I remember of TOH, spent a lot of time trying to fit the Boiling Isles into her opinion of what a fantasy world should be. She doesn’t really listen to the laws or the cultural norms. I suppose that it makes sense to ignore the laws to a certain extent, considering they’re made by a witch hunter pretending to be a benevolent ruler, but she doesn’t even try to think about things critically. Especially in this day and age, you are supposed to research and analyze before you draw a conclusion, not just take the word of some criminal who doesn’t even off you any proof. I love Eda. She’s badass and creative, and I adore how she grows to care about others through the series. But she is a biased character to introduce a world through, and Luz doesn’t even question it. She hears Eda’s “oh, he just wants to control magic” and runs with it.

The biggest example of her complete dismissal of the Boiling Isles culture, laws, and norms would be when she continued to push to be in all classes. Not only does she lack the necessary knowledge to cast precise spells, but she is asking the principal, the teachers, and all the students to risk themselves for her fantasy. This isn’t some petty pickpocketing that she’s asking a few people to ignore. She asks to be allowed to violate one of the most important laws in the whole country—it has the death penalty, for fuck’s sake! Principal Bump could have been executed for allowing this; the teachers could have gone to prison! And the students who don’t turn her in, while unlikely to suffer so severely, are likely to be punished as well! How many people could have been hurt or killed by her thoughtless violation of the laws if Belos had been shown to be a bit more how Dana claims he was? (Because, all things considered, he’s not shown to be the harshest ruler ever.)

Additionally, it bothers me that she never bothers to explore any real cultures or traditions on the Isles. She “wants to be a witch,” but doesn’t focus on anything other than the magic of it. If it were Harry Potter world, where witches are exclusively humans with human culture but magic, I’d get that, but it isn’t. It is a whole other world where everything from childhood to the system of government is different. Her refusal to let go of her preconceived notions and just explore what the BIs is like comes off a little bit like a weeb in their mother’s basement saying “I want to be Japanese,” going to Japan, and then never exploring it beyond their notions of what Japan is like from anime. I love Luz, and it was incredibly impactful for me to see a fellow neurodivergent fantasy nerd on screen, but she has a tendency of treating the Boiling Isles like her escapist fantasies. It bothers me that it’s not really addressed.

Finally, this lack of exploration leads to limited knowledge on what the actual inhabitants of the Boiling Isles are like aside from a select handful. What beliefs aside from the Titan do people have? What rituals do they perform, holidays do they celebrate? What are the people of the Boiling Isles like? Part of what I love about Amphibia is the time it takes to world-build, to show us all the different ways that the world works, and how there are varied, diverse, and unique cultures that are a part of it. It makes Amphibia dynamic and alive. The Owl House doesn’t do that with the Boiling Isles, and I’m bummed about that.

I hope this is close enough to what you’re talking about, because this got me on a tangent.

[xx-alice-in-wonderland-xx]

Abby, Lev & Yara incorrect quotes 🖤

Abby, to Lev: Look at you! All cute and small! I could just eat you up! Lev: *proceeds to kick her in the shin and run away*  Yara, walking past: Rule number 1, don't call Lev cute or small.

Lev: Why is everyone so obsessed with top or bottom? Honestly, I’d just be excited to have a bunk bed.  Abby: Abby: I'm gonna tell him.  Owen: Don't you dare.

Abby: Today, Lev said a swear word, so Yara said that she was going to wash Lev’s mouth out with soap. Lev replied, “It’s okay, I like the taste of soap”. Turns out, they’ve both been putting soap on their lips to blow bubbles for the past hour.

Lev, gardening: Hey, can you bring me the hoe?  Abby: Yeah, sure.  *A few minutes later*  Abby: Here you go.  Lev:  Abby:  Owen: Why am I here?

Yara: Breathe, just breathe.  Lev: I’ve done nothing with my life! I’m a failure!  Their mom in Lev’s mind: Awww, that never bothered you before.

Lev on his 18th birthday: Adulting is hard.  Lev: How do I quit?  Yara: Time travel.  Abby: Die.

Lev: When Yara was born, the gods said, "She’s too perfect for this world."  Abby: Please. When I was born, the devil said, "Oh, competition."

Yara: You get turned back into a baby but you retain all your skills and memory, what do you do?  Abby: Eat a nickel.  Yara: A reminder: You have retained all your skills and memories.  Lev: Eat a nickel.  Yara: Ok.

Lev: Why does everyone want to kill Abby?  Ellie: Because, goddamnit, have you seen her? her neck looks so snappable.

*the Squad cleaning up*  Abby: Pick up the nearest piece of trash and throw it away.  Lev, to Yara: Aight, which bin do you wanna go in—

Lev: *sneaking in through their window*  Yara: *turning in their chair and flicking the light one* You want to tell me where you've been all night?  Lev: I was with Abby?  Abby: *turning in their chair* Wanna try again?

Yara: Do you support gay rights?  Lev: I’m literally trans.  Abby: He’s avoiding the question!

Yara: What did Abby do this time?  Lev: More like WHO did Abby do this time?

Lev: Self care is stuff like taking a bubble bath or putting on a lot of make up if you like that, or taking a nice warm nap and stuff like that basically.  Abby: Self care is the burning heat when rage washes over you. self care is when you feel the bones crack under your powerful fists. self care is the fear in your enemies eyes.  Yara: Self care is stealing someones birthday cake just to eat the frosting.  Lev: If you touch my birthday cake I’ll make you eat your hands.

⬆️ (Lev’s never had a birthday cake 🥲)

Lev: If I die, my funeral will be the biggest party ever and you're all invited.  Yara: "If"  Abby: Great, the only party I'm ever invited to and they might not even die.

Abby: Uh, I think I got your lunch. *Holds up a note that reads: ‘I am very proud of you. Love, Yara’*  Lev: Oh yeah. I didn’t think this was for me. *Holds up a note that reads: ‘Be good. For the love of God, Please be good.’*

Yara: Nice rock.  Lev: Thanks, Abby gave it to me.  Abby: I threw it at you!  Lev: Isn’t she the sweetest?

Yara: Lev! Abby got that thing on the control panel working!  Lev: Wow! That looks pretty impressive.  Yara: Yeah!  Abby: Any idea what it does?  Lev: Not a clue.

Yara: What are you two arguing about this time?  Abby: They’re always using common phrases incorrectly!  Lev: Cry me a table, Abby.

Yara: Lev isn’t answering my messages.  Abby: Allow me.  Yara: I tried 6 times, what makes you thi-  Lev: *replying to message* Hello.

Lev, not understanding the concept of holidays since I headcannon Seraphites didn’t celebrate stuff like Christmas: Christmas is cancelled.  Abby: You can't cancel a holiday.  Lev: Keep it up, Abby, and you'll lose New Year's too.  Abby: What does that mean?  Lev: Yara, take New Year's away from Abby.

Yara, to Abby You know, Lev can be really aggressive, so it's important to take all the necessary precautions when approaching.  Lev: *blows airhorn at a seraphite* GET FUCKED!

this was so funny to make lmao 😭

[password-door-lock]

Content warning: manipulation

Unknown has never been very big on giving comfort— or so he tells himself as you sob into his jacket. You’re grabbing fistfuls of leather, trying your hardest to pull him close, though of course, it doesn’t really do much— you’re not very strong. It wouldn’t take very much effort at all for Unknown to simply push you away. But he allows you to cling to him. With one hand, he returns your embrace, and with the other, he pets your hair.

Does that really make anything better? Unknown can’t imagine that it would. If he were in your position, he’d want to be alone. In fact, he’d be shoving people out of his way, yelling, screaming, and slamming doors just to get some peace and fucking quiet. He’d destroy the contents of whatever room he’d manage to lock himself in, and only then, only after all of that, only with no other options, would he allow himself to break down crying. He certainly wouldn’t do it in front of anybody else. 

“Shhh,” he hushes you. Unknown assures himself that he’s only doing this because he wants you to shut up, not because he cares about your feelings enough to actively soothe you. Why would he give a shit about your feelings? He only brought you here in the first place because he thought that it would hurt those liars, and your time in the apartment did not instill him with very much confidence in your ability to handle important tasks. 

You respond by nuzzling his chest and, in doing so, staining his jacket with salt. Unlike all those times when you attempted to initiate a text conversation with him, you don't seem to have very much to say. “Quiet. You did fine.” The comfort that he offers is stiff and unnatural, but that doesn’t seem to bother you as you gaze at him. 

If only he had something he could use to wipe your face. You’re such a mess, with snot and tears everywhere— seriously, he’s probably going to have to get a new jacket.  You blink the tears out of your eyes. “You don’t hate me?” 

This isn’t such a bad question. Theoretically speaking, Unknown has every reason to hate you— you did ruin his original plan, after all. You could at least have spoken to the RFA and emailed a couple of potential party guests— that would be enough to bring those people to paradise. Instead, you sat around doing nothing, waiting around  for somebody to tell you what to do. In that sense, Unknown supposes, it’s his own fault for not giving you clear instructions, and besides— it’s touching to think that you’re so torn up about causing a minor setback for him. You barely know him— you’ve been here less than a day— and already you’re loyal enough to shed tears over the idea of inconveniencing Unknown. 

But, then again, he’s been monitoring the RFA messenger, and actually, your disappearance has done a lot to disrupt the typical functioning of the organization. Thanks to you, he’ll be able to sway the RFA to his savior’s side, anyway, though it’ll take a bit longer than he initially planned. “Prince(ss),” he coos, patronizing you. It’s to keep you where he wants you, he assures himself, ignoring all the other reasons he could have to behave this way. He has no reason to care about your feelings, no reason to want to make you more comfortable, especially not if you’ve already bought into the doctrine of the Mint Eye. One little speech was all it took to get you to abandon everything you thought you knew about the RFA— but, then again, that speech was quite a lot longer than any conversation you’ve ever had with any of those liars. “If I hated you, I think you’d know it by now, hm?” 

“You’re not mad?” You try again, eyes shining as you gaze up at him. 

Unknown ruffles your hair. It actually feels good to know that he can make you feel better so easily. “No,” he informs you flatly. He supposes he can’t really blame you for not wanting to talk to the boring and selfish members of the RFA— though he doesn’t say that aloud. He doesn’t owe you his reasoning. Unknown does not owe a thing to anybody, with the notable exception of his savior. 

“Okay.” You continue to cling to him like a lifeline, as though your well being truly does depend on it. He supposes that if you really thought that way, you wouldn’t necessarily be wrong— after all, Unknown is the one who can decide what to do with you. “Thank you for saving me,” you breathe. This is music to his fucking ears.

Unknown continues petting your hair. Within the next few hours, he and his Savior will have a new and better plan. Within the next few days, if everything goes as he expects it to, Unknown will have his revenge. No thanks to you, he supposes, but still— even if you couldn’t handle working as his eyes, you’ll make fantastic bait. “You’re very welcome, prince(ss).”