#Toxic father

[pretendmynameispoetic]

3:13 pm at home

“Being around my family for an extended period of time makes me physically ill. I don't know how else to explain it…”

[lovely-abeille]

on being the daughter of the family

if my body could speak, blythe baird // i put the coffin out to sea, lisa marie basile // @/belovedbi // ? // been a son, nirvana // elektra, sophokles; translated by anne carson // ? // churching, kristin chang

[dysphoresque]

being touch-starved [mother issues] and being touch-repulsed [father issues] at the same time

[cats-healing-diary]

I have my father's rage inside of me. And it's getting bigger and bigger, I can't stop it this time. It's killing me, I don't wanna turn into him, I hate this man sooo much, he has ruined my life.

[pain-is-my-game]

One of the worst realizations that I have ever made is realizing that all I ever wanted was to be loved by my parents. I never would've turned out like this if they just loved me unconditionally.

[albinofetus]

due to my father i’m evil now

[aphrodites-serenade]

Like Father, Like Daughter

When I look into the cracked mirror, I see the remnants of you. I hate how my nose is exactly like yours. I hope I can get it fixed one day. Your sister once said I had your eyes. You don't know how much I wished I could gouge them out. But you don't exist only on my face. I can feel it in my bones, and oh, they're too heavy for a girl. I hear it in my voice, and I speak as if I'm you. I run away from my problems, just like how you did years ago. Sometimes, I pretend they don't exist. You knew how to do that so well. Who was it that said that I was too loud? Did they not know it was the only way we communicated? Each time I stand in front of this mirror, I realize that I've become terribly lonely. My father never knew how to love, and I, who always messes up, know that too well. And I hate it, I truly hate it. I'm not my father, I'm not my father, I'm not my father, I repeat. But like father, like daughter goes the proverb… right?

[ashtonisrottting]

i need a mother. i need a father. i need an adult figure to hold me in their arms. i need them to tell me there's no shame in failing and trying again and breaking things and not knowing how to make it all better. i need someone to tell me that sometimes we just can't make things better and it's alright; someone to remind me I'm human and that's fine.

[witchyykitten]

[kissesbeneaththescars]

🎉🎉 I WISH I WAS DEAD 🎉🎉

[nothing0fnothing]

There's no such thing as parental abandonment. A parent can never be abandoned by their own child.

You either cultivate a relationship worthy of your child's ongoing presence, or you don't.

[pretendmynameispoetic]

[xan-the-emo-trans-man]

”my child is fine”

mf your child cries everytime you speak to them

[bipolarblogss]

[chaos-im-herz]

Never heard my dad apologize for anything he did. Never heard him recognize his mistakes and say that he was wrong.

I'm sick and tired of him.

[aphrodites-serenade]

My father is a small child in a man's body

I say a lot of things about my father. He's aggressive, dismissive, and self-centered. And yet I can't help but pity him. I see how his eyes look when he sits alone at the dinner table. This wasn't the life he envisioned for himself when he was a young man. He likes to say he doesn't need to prove himself to anyone but lies to his coworkers for validation. He puffs his chest and criticizes himself in the mirror. He swears it's a habit he wants to break. I'd like to think that that's what he sees when he yells at me and my brother. His father taught him that real men don't cry. I guess what I mean to say is that he's still a small child trying to be a man. He's failed. And I could try to hug him, give him the comfort he's never felt, but he'd push me away. He's a scared boy who doesn't know what he's doing here.