#This is probably almost incomprehensible
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So, I was thinking about Garlemald lore again, because I'm mentally ill and obsessed, and I had a kinda fucked up thought. Explaining it is gonna take some doing, so stay with me.
If the garlean historians are to be believed (and the Sharlayans agree (As seen in Encyclopaedea Eorzea 1), so they're likely correct), roughly 1500 years ago, the garlean people lived in Corvos alongside the G tribe, in a situation probably not dissimilar to the M and Ala Mhigo, with a sedentary tribe fairly peacefully sharing their territory with a nomadic one.
Okay, so, here's where shit gets a little bit tricky.
There is only the ONE race of Garleans (Unless you count Jullus and Cid as a different race for being Short Kings), unlike all the other species of humans, who have at least two (Midlanders/Highlanders, Xaela/Raen, Dunesfolk/Plainsfolk), and sometimes even three (Duskwights/Wildwood/Ishgardians, Hellsguard/Sea Wolves/Far Eastern). This implies a very, very small, and very specialized population. A population that could, very easily, be displaced by a larger, more powerful group, like (as the historians posit) a large tribe of Elezen from what would later become Bozja, who, very likely, were themselves, forced from their homelands by invading Roegadyn and Hrothgar. If this tribe was sufficiently large (and magically skilled) enough, they could have very easily expunged the proto-Garleans from Corvos and forced them northward.
The Garlean historians claim that this forced exodus pushed them all the way into north central Ilsabard, but this is incredibly unlikely, as no matter how devoted to a people's total annihilation a tribe may be, hounding them the entire distance from Fantasy Greece to Fantasy Siberia is more than a bit ridiculous. But I digress.
What is more likely is that the Garleans were forced more westward, nearer to proto-Werlyt, where they likely settled for a time, before expanding north into the mountains which cut the continent in half (it is still violently upsetting to me we don't have a full map of Ilsabard). A few centuries of relative peace followed, where the proto-Garleans expanded ever so slightly further north, before, once again, they lost a war, most likely one against Hyurs and Raen from either Proto-Werlyt or Proto-Thavnair, and lost their southerly territories.
With no other option but continue colonizing northward, the Garleans did exactly that, eventually founding "Garlemald", the city, a few decades later, and the rest is, quite literally, history.
Now, with that lore dump out of the way, we can get to the real meat of my thought.
Almost all evidence points towards the Garleans simply being another species of human, just like Hyurs, Elezen, and Au ra, and not a "created species", like the Ixal, and, therefore, they definitely had a mirror race on the other shards.
But where the fuck are they?
I have seen neither hide nor hair of a single Garlean, be it in the flesh, as a statue, or in a tomb in Amh Areng, Kholusia, Lakeland, or Rak'tika. There's absolutely nothing to show that the Garlean people existed on the First, which is very, very fucking strange, as even the Amalj'aa and Ixal (sort of) have mirrors on the First in the form of the Zun and the Amaro.
I can think of two answers to my question:
The Doylist answer, (which is much less interesting), is just that Square either forgot to make any Garlean NPCs for the first, or decided against depicting First!Garleans, possibly because the race both didn't have an equivalent from a previous FF game, like the Hrothgar/Ronso, or Elezen/Elves, nor were playable, like like the Au ra/Drahn, or, because the Garleans are the go-to "Bad Guy Race" and they didn't want to confuse players.
The Watsonian answer, (and the one I subscribe to), is that the First!Garleans are extinct, having been driven to the brink by The Flood and over the edge in the ensuing century of strife, alongside many, many other species and peoples.
#This is probably almost incomprehensible#It is five in the fucking morning for me#and I woke up from a dead sleep to goz this autism onto your timelines as if by Divine Mandate.#Anyway#I really hope we get more Garlemald lore in general#For being THE main (non-magical) bad guys of the setting#we really do know jack shit fuck all about their history and culture#And the crumbs Endwalker gave us really doesn't fucking cut it#ffxiv#ff14#final fantasy xiv#final fantasy 14#garlemald#Shadowbringers Spoilers (kind of)#Shadowbringers#Endwalker
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like motherdaughter like fatherson
#i know this post is incomprehensible to people who haven’t heard sigewinne’s voice line about wriothesley#basically she’s much older than him and probably sees him like a son#meanwhile wrio probably sees it as his duty to protect sigewinne. now that he’s grown up he’s giving back#almost like a son who’s simultaneously a father#does that make sense? no?#cool#genshin impact#sigewinne#wriothesley ♡
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a lot of people seem to use Entry #61 as 'proof' for the crux of the "Brian didn't care about Tim, he was Taking Advantage of Tim's conditions and Forcing him to work as part of totheark" thing, but honestly when you think about it there's no possible way Brian could have possibly orchestrated that series of events, like you almost have to interpret that as a baffling group of coincidences
#N posts stuff#mh lb#it's not like Brian has loads of mutual friends that he could ask to call Tim out one night; Tim's departure right as Brian showed up#just has to be a coincidence ; second yes. Brian does steal Tim's meds & that's a dick move but it's almost safe to assume#that Tim and Brian had been sharing prescriptions back in S1 - that's why the pills were at Brian's house that time Jay broke in#even if Tim no longer remembers that agreement it's not like Brian is brimming with other options so i can see the throughline of it#but there's NO way that Brian knew that 1) Tim was going to immediately turn around and come back home OR#2) be in the throes of an attack when he did so ; there's no Possible way he planned for that -- even if you Could assume that like. what#Brian 'knows' the operator is following him & Somehow orchestrated an encounter 1) no that doesn't make any sense and#2) that Still doesn't make any sense bc Tim has been Plenty Close to the Operator before w/ almost no negative effects (like in#Entry 17 when it's Right behind him) so there's no possible way Brian could have predicted that would unfold this way#sure it's weird he sets up the camera in the closet before Tim comes back but that Could Have been something unrelated#after all sometimes Brian DOES deliberately put himself on camera so someone knows he's responsible for something#or maybe he even planned to leave the camera there for later but it doesn't make Sense to interpret that as him Knowing what would happen#like don't get me wrong i'm not trying to say Brian is a pinnacle of ethics and moral behavior lmfao but also it's like#a kind of incomprehensible argument to make that he was Responsible for Triggering Tim's seizure that night when for all the#information Brian had on hand when he broke in he'd think Tim probably wouldn't be back home until much later#(''but the Creators Clearly intended'' yeah sure but since the creators also failed to establish a coherent series of events that SHOW#it then like. the intent doesn't matter anymore; sure they scripted the events in close succession but that doesn't mean they#scripted Intent & if they meant to then they did a bad job portraying it to the point the supposed intent is meaningless sorry lmao)#and EVEN IF you get this far and you're Still like 'but tim went after Jay and Brian would've Known he'd do that' like. no he wouldn't#because in Entry 18 when we see Tim have a seizure the first thing he does when jay approaches him after it is Run Away#so Again there's no consistent throughline of behaviors that Brian could have Possibly known about to orchestrate jack shit
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see I am very disjointed from a lot of nine/ten fandom discourse because I genuinely believe that in a different world where space boy was not to be seen, had an older Rose gone to the hospital and bumped into a certain Doctor Jones by a vending machine or as she was taking Rose’s vitals, she would have instantly hit it off with Martha. and probably flirted with her a little on accident and then on purpose when Martha flirted back
#I can see Martha raising an eyebrow as she catches Rose (who definitely snuck out despite being on bedrest) by the vending machine#Rose probably snuck out of bed because the girl in the bed next to her was crying and she wanted to make her feel better#because she doesn’t really like hospitals either#and when she tells Martha this she’s surprised when the Doctor (who seems quite strong and a little serious) suddenly smiles#and shows her a trick to get extra sweets and chocolate out of the machine#and then tells her to hurry because the check-in sweep of Rose’s ward is about to begin#you just KNOW Rose would be Martha’s most combative patient but in all the best ways#always asking what that machine does. what that incomprehensible doctor scrawl means. if there’s something she can do to help other patients#and Martha loves it. loves how much Rose cares just like her. they gossip and they chat about their daily lives. they get closer#everytime Martha has to scold Rose for sneaking out of bed or doing something she shouldn’t#(even though she secretly adores it. she’s never really mad she just wants Rose to take care of herself as well as other people)#she sighs and says (in her most firm but still fond tone) ‘Miss Tyler-’#only to be struck in the heart again with a cheeky grin and a ‘yes Doctor Jones?’#and also Rose loves that Martha is a doctor. that Martha cares. that she works overtime. that almost all Martha’s patients love her#and the ones that don’t just aren’t kind people anyway. that Martha doesn’t condescend. that Martha cares and cares and cares#that Martha likes all the things about Rose that other people think make her difficult and trouble and too much#she likes the things that other people don’t like in Martha either. thinks she’s magic.#Rose Tyler is always going to love her Doctor. and Martha Jones will always love somebody who thinks everybody matters#I’m like. obsessed with them?? move OVER space boy (actually nine can get involved in this. lmao ten stay away)#they’d have been so cuteeeee#rtd failed to see the lesbionic possibility but I am no such coward. no fighting over boys here#martha jones#rose tyler#dw#doctor who
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𝐒𝐨𝐯𝐚𝐧𝐧 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐚 —— 𝘪𝘭𝘭-𝘧𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘴𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘮𝘰𝘰𝘯'𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩.
A beautifully drawn c0mmission by dimaviies on twitter! I definitely forgot to mention how big Sovann's claws are and that they have a tail in my reference, but I can't bring myself to care with how lovely this piece turned out! Please do check out their work and support them if you can! ˙˚ʚ(´◡`)ɞ˚˙
( psst, click the images for higher quality! )
#〈♢*〉 the horrors are incomprehensible to YOU; im in their dms ╲ OOC#〈ஐ*〉sovann ╲ MIRROR#* SAVE#* WHEN I TELL U I ALMOST SQUEALED AT WORK ASHSDHF#* i've felt like a dog chasing my tail all day#* WELL I'M BREAKING MY NO TUMBLR ON THE WEEK DAYS RULE RN SO I MIGHT AS WELL POP INTO A FEW INBOXES#* ...if i have the energy after i make dinner :x#* BEHOLD! a creature with 97 mental illnesses 29 behavioral issues and who's probably eaten dry wall#* wait i didn't do enough gushing in the tags#* I'M SO? IN LOVE WITH THE WAY THEY COLORED SOVANN'S HAIR!!! IT'S PERFECT!! EXACTLY HOW I PICTURE IT#* AND THE SHINY GRADIENT ON THEIR HORNNN UGHHHHH#* i'm so mad i didn't have a specific outfit designed for them but i love the elegant minimalism the artist gave them!!!
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oh my god okay so it's recursively- the "alternate pasts" are- right, of course, you get the pasts from the tree but the utility is all in the stack. the point in the past of the mizarkhani event, the divergence point, that's the same, it looks like <|<|<|<| and not >|>|>|>|. so that first level, the stack, that's where you get something alternate, until that point everything has to converge on the same point of divergence defining the event, but... wait, no, it's... then what's the point of... how do you harness any of that for calculation? what do the intermediate steps on the ladder contribute, if they all get lanced through with the same thing? is it... something to do with the imperfect copying? do those imperfections somehow encode information from the intermediate calculational pasts? or, when directed, is it all just a matter of... making sure whatever answer-checking mechanic survives to the self-selecting terminus? or...
...i need to finish reading this treatise before i go insane about it prematurely.
#almost nowhere#i just started heading ii of vii#almost nowhere spoilers#but like the kind that are probably completely incomprehensible out of context so don't worry about it
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does anyone have book recs similar to iwwv like either just dark (or light?) academia recs outside of tsh nh & ta6 OR books that have a focus on theatre or music (ik music isn’t a focus in iwwv but it also Very much works)
#or both. but i know the answer to that is almost certainly no#im literally just living vicariously at this point i hate it here so so much 😋 broke down today and typed up an incomprehensible rant in the#tags but that will not be seeing the light of day. probably#personal#alsooo again probably the answer is no but if there are books matching these requests that happen to be sapphic. 👀#book recs
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would you ever write a cheesy romance, be it within a whump story (such as a flashback or life before) or not?
hmm….i might imply it or maybe, possibly write it as a subplot within a whump story. Never by itself though i don’t think. My skills at writing ‘cheesy romance’ are subpar and i would cringe writing it and i think i would make everyone who read it also cringe
#thanks for the ask!#i have almost zero practice writing romance of any kind#i think it’s a side effect of being ace#no wish to get involved no wish to have anything to do with romance#but then again i have no wish to actually torture someone irl#so hey some romantic subplot might come up at some point#but most likely and in all honesty probably not#sorry if this is incomprehensible#i tend to ramble#troy talks
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i am so excited for roy and ed to actually get to the cult 👀👀👀 how long until they start getting the madness tho 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀
As my memes may suggest, it's pretty instant. For Roy anyway haha
#fullmetal alchemist#Cult of Desire fic#like it's nothing major at first#just incomprehensible whispering in his head he can't understand#but it starts as soon as they arrive#there's new people both of which have relatively pure desires one of which is fire-based#of course Ray's gonna immediately take interest haha#this is also probably gonna wind up being my longest fic by word count#I don't know if it's gonna be the longest by chapter count (I don't think I'll ever beat Breeding Doe lol)#but chapter 1 alone is almost 2500 words and chapter 2 is almost 4000 and it's not done yet#there will probably still be shorter chapters#but I think I'm gonna be averaging at around 3000 words per chapter on this one and it's gonna be at least 20-30 chapters long#the chapters where they're *in* Lu'uẓ̌t'Grav might even breach 10k words#depending on how many individual chapters they spend there#I dunno we'll see
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I need to get ready for bed but I remembered the dentist appointment that's coming up in less than 2 weeks and ended up dissociating for over 2 hours (I'm honestly not sure how long it's been) and I do not feel good in the slightest after that
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#vent post#it's not the treatment that's the issue. it's literally just that it requires sedation. I would be fine if not for that#and our brain keeps fixating on it to try and find some kind of solution or something that would help#but we can't think of anything. I don't know if there actually is any way to get around this#and it's not a fear of anything bad happening#it's that the concept of someone else being able to control whether I'm conscious and whether I remember anything#just inherently feels so incredibly violating no matter what actually happens during the appointment#logically I do not want to deal with the appointment. sedation is a great option. you don't have to experience any of the shit that happens#but the entire premise is so triggering I can't talk about it without getting shaky and hyperventilating and bursting into tears#also like... the recovery period afterwards where you're really out of it and say weird shit freaks me the fuck out#specifically the idea of being in that state around other people or just in a place that isn't at home in our room on our own#basically I can't handle a stranger giving me a drug that'll stop me remembering anything that happens for a while#and then make me really woozy and spaced out while I'm around other people#there's also another reason the concept of being made to just not experience a certain amount of time by another person is an issue for me#but I'm fully aware that it sounds deeply unhinged and stems from specific source stuff and I cannot explain that to most people#but it's a thing that there really isn't a workaround for and no matter how well we handle the rest of the issues around it#that will almost certainly fuck me up regardless. probably more than the other stuff would#but trying to talk about it would probably make me sound kind of insane because like... I probably kind of am#either that or I'll explain it to someone and they'll be like ''oh yeah no I totally get that''#but I'm more used to being treated like my issues are incomprehensible and I need to just stop being such a freak
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DPxDC Danny the Guy Who Won't Die
He lives in Gotham, and he is just A Guy. Nothing weird about him, he's just there to study/work/help Lady Gotham to lift her curse/on vacation with Sam. Point is, he is not there to cause trouble and there's no GIW on his tail. Just a dude living his (after)life.
And Gotham, being Gotham, still finds a way to be annoying. There are mugging attempts, robbery, Rogues running around. Only Danny really doesn't want to deal with any of it.
Now there's a dilemma. If he uses his powers to fight, it will sooner or later come to Bats' attention. And if he fights as a human, it will also alert some of the Bats since he doesn't really do a great job at keeping his power levels low. Not to mention the fact he is really not enthusiastic about accidentally punching someone hard enough he sends them to a hospital.
What does he do instead? He pulls the 'I guess I'll die' act.
So every time he is attacked, he just plays dead. The mugger shot him in the chest? He falls down and stops breathing. Caught up in the middle of a Poison Ivy attack? Skewers himself on the vine and goes lax. Scarecrow's Fear Gas? Very dramatically chokes himself and plays a corpse. He makes sure to disappear before any ambulances arrive later, and it all goes well for a few months - he is just a casualty, who cares, really - until one day, he runs into that same mugger who shot him in the chest a while ago.
The man does a double take. Danny doesn't notice - he's been mugged so many times, who has the brain capacity to remember all of those fuckers. But the rumor goes out anyway.
A guy-who-won't-die. It's more of a city legend, really, and the Bats don't give it much thought since, well, it sounds stupid and not very important. A rumor of some man who was shot dead and then showed up like nothing happened? Yeah, it's probably because the mugger didn't check if he was actually dead. That happens. Maybe it wasn't even the same man, Gotham is a big city. If anything, hey, at least that was one less casualty? That's a good thing.
That is, until one day, they show up to Joker's hostage situation and witness the clown screaming at one of the hostages. He is so enraged he is shaking, spit flying out of his mouth, and, contrary to the usual Joker's evil sneers and maniacal laughter, he seems just... furious. But, like, the normal-human-level furious. The 'I just lost the last ounce of patience with you' furious.
"Don't you look away from me, you think I don't remember you?! Na-ah, I do. You were the one I drowned in the shark tank last week! And you were the one run through the chainsaw trap two weeks before that! And you were in the guillotine!!! I saw your fucking head get deattached from your body, how the fuck are you here again?!"
And the guy he is screaming at just looks at him, confused and incomprehensive.
"Um, I'm pretty sure I'd remember getting my head cut off, you know? So, err, wrong guy."
"Wrong guy my fucking ass-"
Joker is so distracted by his screaming match that it makes it almost too easy for the Bats to fight him down and drag to Arkham. Yet, a few of them get just a bit suspicious.
Now, imagine all the shenanigans when they try keeping a watch on Danny the Won't Die Guy.
#danny phantom#dc x dp#dpxdc#batman#joker#danny refuses to die#not again#at least this time he gets to make it funny#the bats are mostly confused#is he a meta?#but what kind of meta just... cant die?#what?#cork prompts#just silly thoughts
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I have been thinking about small children and small dogs.
It is sometimes observed that small dogs can be unholy terrors. I have come to think this is more because of unintentional training rather than a lack of training.
If you have a large and potentially dangerous dog, you will probably seek to train it just so it does not damage your home or family. If you have a 2 kg dog, you just pick it up and move it if it is misbehaving.
This inadvertently trains your small dog to escalate if it wants any degree of self determination. It avoids someone but gets picked up. It runs away but gets picked up. It barks, it growls, it gets scolded and picked up. If it goes absolutely berserk and does its best to kill someone, it might not get picked up. You have taught your dog *this* is what it takes to be taken seriously as a very small animal.
Small children are often treated a lot like small pets. They are small people filled with needs and wants, almost powerless in the face of a nigh incomprehensible world. And larger people scold them and pick them up when their needs and wants are inconvenient for the larger people.
I have been around many small children this week and seen many meltdowns. Some of them are just exhausted and overstimulated. Some are probably classic brats who have been taught they can get their way if they just whine enough, which is a variation on the same idea.
But I must believe that some of them have learned this is the *only* way they will get *any* attention to their stated wants and needs.
Your parents have a plan and an agenda for the day, and you were not consulted because you are 4 years old, but you are still a human being with needs to understand and to some extent control your environment, and if the only way you can get anyone to listen to you for 5 minutes is to make those minutes absolute hell for everyone involved, yourself included, well, that is what it takes.
When you are 4 years old, fairly petty inconveniences can in fact be the worst thing that has ever happened to you. Small children can have the best and worst moments of their lives several times a day. They are learning the bounds of "normal," and they don't have many days that could have been worse.
It can be hard being a Very Small Animal.
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I've had a headache long enough I think I'd be willing to hear her out about the whole thing
#i find her ideas compelling and would like to subscribe to her newsletter#also.#transitioning could have saved her#this is probably fucking incomprehensible to almost everybody#um. sorry about that. my bad
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Scarlet End
Mr Scarletta x Reader
(Anything in bold is in the other world language)
How did you end up here? In those apartments? In this other world? Could it really all have been fate?
No. It was all his fault. Ever since you spilt blood on his property, you were in the palm of his hand. He toyed with your reality like it was all just a game to him. You supposed that likely wasn't far from the truth.
How many days had you been running? Every corner you turned brought you face to face with a new monster, difficult to distinguish between friend or foe. Although you suppose you probably didn't look much better at this point. Blood slipped through the cracks of your raincoat, staining the white dress underneath as you fell to your knees. You were so tired. Even if you could keep running, where would you go? All you could see for miles was an ocean of red. And your hunter didn't suffer the same exhaustion you did.
Shade falls over you. Although now that you think about it, was there ever a light source to begin with? Either way, you don't have to raise your head to know that a red umbrella was covering you. Not to mention the telltale static that always managed to make your teeth throb.
He says something incomprehensible.
No, you know this one. It's the same thing he asks for every time he sees you.
"Give name?"
You finally raise your head to look at him. His red hair covered most of his face, but you could still catch a glimpse of his haunting eyes staring at you, unblinking.
You clumsily utter out what you think is the equivalent of "Why?"
"Me like you. You give name, me ??? you."
What was that word again? It was one Mr Crawling used often. Something like... protect.
"Protect you."
Could he really protect you? Judging by the reactions of everyone else here, you were under the impression that he was the one you needed protection from. The voice on the telephone seemed adamant that you not tell anyone your name. But could you really trust that voice? They hadn't led you astray yet.
They also said you would have to make a choice.
All things considered, this is Mr Scarletta's world. Either you refuse and keep running for the rest of your life, or you join Scarletta in his reign of terror. Your crowbar digs into your shoulder, reminding you of your past. When you stop to think about it, you're not so different from Scarletta. Maybe you're even worse.
"Name... Y/n."
His eerie smile grew more than you thought was possible.
"Y/n." He repeats.
His hand is cold and rubbery, not unlike a corpse, as he takes your own. The fact that he was incorporeal when you swung your crowbar at him a few minutes ago nags at the bag of your mind. Your brow creases in annoyance, but if Scarletta notices he doesn't say anything. It really was true that this world was stacked against you.
Scarletta rises to his full height, pulling you up with him. It takes a great deal of effort to force your aching muscles to stretch once more, and your knees nearly buckle again. Amidst your struggle to right yourself, he hands you his umbrella, much to your confusion. Before you can ask why, he scoops you into his arms bridal style. You supposed this was his way of showing that he cared.
Under the cover of the red umbrella, you feel isolated from the rest of the world. Even if that world was only a wasteland of red for right now. Fear grips your throat as you meet his awful eyes. They were even worse up close. Even now, having gotten what he wanted, his expression seemed the same as always. Being so close, the static was almost deafening as it continued to assault your ears. Perhaps these were all traits that you would grow used to in time.
"Let's go."
#Homicipher#Mr Scarletta#Mr Scarletta x reader#Scarletta x reader#Homicipher Scarletta#mr crawling#mr crawling x reader#Homicipher Mr crawling#Homicipher x reader#mr hood#mr machete#mr silver#mr silvera#mr chopped head#mr hood x reader#mr machete x reader#mr silver x reader#mr silvera x reader#mr chopped x reader#mr chopped#mr red#mr red x reader
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me overthinking the ultimate showdown of ultimate destiny after watching reaction videos all day turned into an accidental disassembled and rearranged short essay on propaganda theory for taking advantage of modern algorithms.
if you're into that hyper specific intersection of sociology and neurotically satisfyingly assembled posts, you might like this little russian nesting doll of information that comes in the form of the Final Form of this idea on twitter:
and i'll leave you with this final word, and the final tweet connecting to this one, so that i can give myself a hard cap and not keep rambling:
weakest performance in Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny is Aaron Carter. he had one small feat before dying to the batmobile.
being able to jump shaq is impressive, but he did get surprise advantage [he comes, quote; "out of the blue", e.g. by surprise, or guerilla warfare].
#reply#the end! :D#i have to stop posting like this#i feel like an insane person looking at this frankenstein monstrosity of text#this feels near incomprehensible and probably is to some but i hope that i didnt lose EVERYBODY.#easter egg 1: SHOUTOUTS TO TUMBLR TAGS WHICH HAVE TURNED ALMOST UNIVERSALLY INTO THE 'SIDENOTE' USAGE CATEGORY. its great for easter eggs#easter egg 2: the light blue highlight around the tweets are to break up the white background of twitter with the default white of tumblr-#'s posts. this improves readability THEREFORE retaining attention further.#i hope these extra little tricks feel rewarding if u cared enough to read all of this shit AND the tags#im glad you cared about what i thought.
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Jjk guys and whats gets them going
cw: intercourse (p in v), fingering, brief mention of bondage, grinding, boners, head (male and female receiving and giving), sex in public spaces.
a/n: can you tell who were my favs in this?? (Toge has me on my knees and Geto has me in a chokehold 🙁). All characters are aged up; 18+.
Itadori Yuuji - Ass
Itadori Yuuji, who just simply, loves a nice ass. He likes to have a nice hold on yours at all times– ofcourse, he won't, he's not a creep who cops a feel out of nowhere, but trust me when I say in every situation, there's atleast one part of his brain thinking about your butt. It's an instinct. Beside, he's your boyfriend, you probably think about... something about him in a sexual matter all the time. Haha. He loves ass.
You cupped his jaw softly as he pushed you on the bed, hands on your thighs so you could find your place on his lap, hands now on the plush of your thighs.. roaming north. You couldn't help but smile, as he paid no mind to his hands.
"What is it?"
As he said this, they were crawling up your skirt, and he was sporting a face so innocent you'd be oblivious to what he was doing if you weren't the one feeling it, you couldn't help but laugh– did he even know?
His hands were still lifting your skirt up, stopping at your butt, palming it as he tilted his head at you, only making you laugh.
"You have– no shame–!"
He smiled, pressing his lips to your collarbone, peppering feather light kisses as he rejoiced in the sound of your laughter, even though he wasn't sure if you were laughing at him or not, either way, he was just happy to be here.
"What's there to be ashamed of– Shit."
You finally stopped laughing, due the the multiple hickeys left by Yuuji's sly lips, and as you squirmed, he pressed you further into his lap, feeling the reason he cursed out of nowhere.
"Maybe that."
"Then... do something about it."
He cursed alot more that night.
Fushiguro Megumi - Voice
Fushiguro Megumi who can't get over the things your voice does to him. Always hushed but loud enough to be understood clearly, a sultry undertone only he can decode– he's the only one thinking about you in that way anyways. Megumi who loves but equally hates how one sentence a tone too suggestive from you has his pants suddenly feeling too tight– He can't get enough. It doesn't even have to be dirty!– Just say anything that can be taken the wrong way and if you take the time to look down, the effect you have on him will be pretty obvious.
Megumi accepted you in his arms, gently acting like a brace for your charged run at him, you haven't seen him in too long to even try and hold back, you knew he could handle it.
His arms helped you hug him more than he was hugging you, but the feeling of his hand on your back, pushing you closer to him was enough to let a wide smile and a fit of content sighs slip past your lips. Sounds that made Megumi's cheeks flush ever so slightly.
"I've missed you so much.." You sighed softly against the space between his neck and ear, leaving a chaste kiss right there. "Megumi."
"Don't act so surprised now.. You knew what you were doing." He muttered, almost incomprehensibly as he fumbled to unbutton your shirt, the bulge of his boxers and the haze of his eyes only serving to soak your underwear even more.
"Not my fault you can't help yourself.." He slid your blouse off of you so quick that you barely remember having it on, his warm, slim hands on your waist, then your thighs, eyes roaming on you, and your lips.
"You're right. I can't help myself, but you can." His pretty eyelashes fluttered down at you, leaning closer so he could press your back firmly to the bed, pushing his bulge against you, lips falling to your neck, a bit rough with his biting– but, if it gets the job done..
He fucked you pretty good that night.
Inumaki Toge - Mouth
Inumaki Toge who just loves your mouth. Your lips, the tint, colour, texture– the way it moves. It's a bit of a dirty secret for him, eyes always trailing to your lips whenever he talks to you, not even because he wants to kiss you, just because it's just so natural for him. Not that he doesn't want to kiss you, but sometimes it's just more fun to stick his fingers in your mouth and watch you suck them. it's a dirty secret for a reason.
Toge loves your mouth. In a sexual way and.. okay it's all in a sexual way– he just loves your mouth. He likes spoon feeding you food and watch you swallow whatever was on it, or maybe just randomly curl his fingers in your mouth, always sporting a dirty smirk during and after.
It always turns something in him on, but as much as he loves the team your mouth and his active imagination make, nothing beats your mouth wrapped around his cock, like right now.
"Mmn– Ah–" He covered his mouth, not just to save the ears of anyone near, but one slip up and he might put you in a coma, for literally fucking your brains out.
You looked up at him as you sucked him off against his bedroom door, eyes fluttering up to meet his which only drove him even more crazy, legs almost giving in as his eyes stayed on you, hips jolting forward, deeper.
Your head bobbed at a steady rythym, hand pumping what you couldn't reach, dick wet with your spit, small veins sprawled around, veins that you felt all so well, deep in your throat.
His whines and groans and grunts replaced all the curses he wanted to yell but couldn't– biting his lip– how much more could he take? He was so... so close.
But as soon as you made the decision to suck on his tip? Oh, he came undone so quick, thick strings of cum spilling in your mouth, on your lips, some on your nose and dripping down your chin.
"You cummed more than usual, did I do a good job?" You asked, tilting your head with a small smirk.
You wiped the cum around your mouth with your thumb and licked it off, analyzing the taste as– Toge's dick brushed your lip, his tip staring at you, hard again.
"Already?" It was less of a question, more a genuine plee of worry and shock, as you looked up to a blushing Toge, shrugging as he took your chin, and pressed himself in your mouth once again.
He got overstimulated, the most horrible best head of his life.
Okkotsu Yuuta - Hands
Okkotsu Yuuta who loves your hands. Whether you're tending to his injuries, or just brushing crumbs off his face, your fingers on him always results in a furious blush. His mind spirals, feeling so dizzy the way his blood rushes to his dick, it makes him feel horrible each time you innocently tend to him, but he isn't feeling so bad when he jerks off, imagining your hands instead of his. Except this time.. he didn't have to imagine.
Oh he felt so wrong– but he didn't want you to stop, he really didn't want you to stop.
It all started with the cinema staff, selling you tickets to one of their least viewed movies– ofcourse they had their doubts, a relatively young couple going to watch an unpopular movie, they knew the gist. But back then you guys really were just going to see the movie– Yuuta has been rambling about it all week, if anyone, his intentions were pure.
But he couldn't say the same now, his jeans unziped, boxers pulled down, your hand pumping his dick as he suppressed his moans, hiding his red face.
There was barely any other people, and you both were in the far back, nobody would see you guys; was your attempt at convincing Yuuta to let you give him a handjob, it didn't take much.
He was slowly getting louder, your thumb on his slit, rubbing his pretty, pink and sensitive tip, precum still dripping down his length to your hand.
"Shh, Yuuta, you need to quiet down." You leaned into him, whispering those words in his ear as he grunted, choosing to take matters in your own hands as you covered his mouth, feeling his moan on your palm.
"Mmn.. Come on Yuuta, you want to cum don't you? Then be quiet, cum all you want but stay quiet for me, 'kay?"
You pumped him faster, finally feeling him jolt as you rushed to angle his dick, away from himself, staining the back of the seat infront of him.
"M–Ah.." His muffled sounds coaxed you to remove your hand from his mouth. "Ah.. How... are we gonna clean that up?"
"Said the janitor."
You guys cleaned it up, Yuuta felt too guilty.
Gojo Satoru - Clothing
Gojo Satoru who just loves anything you wear. That's it. He's a simple guy, wear a skimpy dress and oh no, it's suddenly on the floor. Though he loves the eye candy, he isn't very patient in bed... You know that lingerie set you bought? Yeah, it's in a the pile of ripped clothing, full of many pervious lingerie sets... There really isn't any limit to his horniness, Just exist and this man is all over you.
Partys were very hectic. Drinking, games, weed, people making out in random corners in houses of... People he equally doesn't know of. But what he does know, is having you grind up on him while wearing a dress that leaves so little to the imagination, makes him feel things that can't be describes as less than insanely horny. He intends to do something about it.
"Woah.. No way you're already that wet– You want me that bad?" He laughed, bending you over the kitchen table. Nobody was there, and if someone did come, Satoru genuinely woud not care, too focused on fucking you to give any more fucks.
Your underwear was soaked, Satoru slipping them down your legs, smiling as one rub of your clit had you flinching, quickly thrusting two fingers in as he unbuckled his pants, stretching your pussy wide so he could fit, your guttural moan fueling his own, hands on your ass, spreading you as he pressed his girth into you.
He grinded his dick into you, thrusting slowly, starting off with a steady pace, your wetness lubricating his dick, sliding in and out of you so easily– fingers flicking your clit continuously as he moved in you. Your moans and the creeking of the table udnerneeth tempting him to cum right then and there, but no– no, this was way to good to finish early.
You guys got caught, and kicked out. But atleast you both finished 🤷🏿♀️.
Geto Suguru - Words
Geto Suguru who loves it when you talk dirty. Text him how bad you need him and he's already behind you, spreading your legs. Talk about how much you've missed him while trailing your hands on his chest and those hands will be tied together as he fucks you mercilessly (maybe a bit mercifully, he loves you after all). Imply anything and he will find the underlined want, he reads people well, and you're his favourite book.
"Mm– Ah- Suguru–!" You cummed in his mouth for what felt like the hundreth (fifth) time since you sent that text. You knew he got turned on by it but immediately ringing on your doorbell after one "I need you" text? This man was.. Something else.
His mouth worked wonders on your clit; kissing and sucking softly, tongue traveling in you resulting in his thumb replacing where his lips once were. His mouth and your cunt slick with your juices; previous releases– oh and don't forget how he worked his fingers. One finger stretched you– now imagine two of them– you could only take so much.
One hand was pressing your thigh against the couch, keeping your legs open as his other hand had two of his girthy fingers deep in you, thumb rubbing circles on your clit as his lips kissed the surrounding area– notably your inner thighs, eyes focused on your face.
Did he know how hot he looked right now? Your cunt clenched around his fingers and he smirked, only making you react further, fingers curling just the way you liked it, you made it so easy for him.
"You like that?" And you squirmed, Suguru internally noting that as a yes as his fingers moved faster, hand spreading your legs further open.
"Gonna need you to keep your legs open for me." He gazed down at you leaving a couple hickies your thighs, your thighs instinctevely closing but his grip was stronger, observing eye never leaving you.
"Come on, nothing to say?" He chuckled. "That's not what I read earlier, you need me don't you? Need me in you or my fingers? Want me to fuck you senseless or.."
He kissed your thigh up further, fingers moving at such a fast pace– Oh god you can't take much more.
"Mn–Ah–! Suguru G'nna cum– 'M so close–!"
"Yeah?"
He smirked, stopping, making you beg for release, taking a moment to revel in your desperate plees, before giving in and letting your cum on his fingers, bringing them up to his lips, murmuring something about 'way better than curses'.
"Open up."
His cum sokaed fingers teased at your lips, dripping down to your chin as you obeyed. He paused just for a second to look at your opened mouth, letting his mind run before pressing his index and middle finger deep in your throat, making you gag slightly.
"Suck my fingers."
You obeyed again, Suguru briefly muttering a 'good girl', proceeding to lower his head again, now with three fingers at his disposal.
Three fingers wasn't enough to prepare you.
Nanami Kento - Actions
Nanami Kento that just finds everything you do, insanely attractive. Walk in a certain way and he suddenly feels hot, tilt your head a bit too much and two hickeys will magically find their ways to your neck. Exorcize a curse too well, and his back will suddenly be littered with marks. It's not like he's horny all the time– you just give him no choice, not when the moment you see that glint in his eyes you're suddenly all over him. He doesn't make the rules, but you definitely abide by them.
Kento may be called a stickler for the rules but that's simply what he is. For one, he isn't one to partake in public indecency.
Gojo might, God knows Kento holds him to no standards. But he does hold himself to many, and fucking in a parking lot isn't something that fits in those standards. Not like he cares right now anyways, he's pussy drunk.
His hands were on your ass, your nipple in his mouth, licking and teasing as you bounced on him, your body above him, hips raised ever so slightly to fuck you aswell, breathy grunts leaving his lips.
It's not his fault that during your weekly night drive you decide to tease him. Sure, holding his hand isn't technically teasing, but– Come on, you were rubbing his finger so suggestively– pulling his hands from your thigh closer to your core– you can't blame him.
The car was feeling all too warm, his seat moved back to accommodate the both of you, his hand under the crook of your knee, raising your leg so he could–
"Mn‐Ah! Kent-ngh–!" He slapped your ass. hips rutting up into you, so deep but not deep enough– lewd squelching sounds muffled by the sound sounds your moans, having to brace yourself by holding onto the car door, anything–
"Agh–" He cummed, velvety walls getting filled with his warm seed, cock still in you so nothing could spill out, mouth moving from your sentive nipples up your neck to your lips, soft and supple, your cunt clenching around him, fluids meshing together.
"This was a one time thing. Next time will be in bed."
The next time, was in fact, not in bed.
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