marajs-blog

[demon-blood-youths]

Crash Course at Jujutsu High|| Closed RP

After the whole scary situation in Tokyo with the haunting. Gojo Saruto recommended that to help Taz with her demon cursed spirit, Kinie Ger to enroll at Jujutsu High. To help her to control cursed energy and control Kinie Ger. Taz must stay in the school for the year. 

The DBT at first were hesitant leaving Taz in the care of people they just met. But after the whole ordeal, they think it’s for the best if not for Taz telling the team that she wants to go. So the team agreed that Taz enrolled at Jujustu Tokyo High. Not only that, the team are allowed to come to the school for four months to learn about cursed energy, cursed spirits and jujutsu spirts before they go back to New York City. 

The team were excited for their lesson since it’s been awhile since all of them went back to school. They want to learn so in case if they encounter a situation like this in the states, they know what to do. Of course, one certain person wants this badly like Taz than anyone else.

-----

‘So I can to use cursed energy I have to manipulate it into a cursed technique? It can be innate or inherited.’ Ink reads the book as the team return to Jujutsu High, writing down notes in the classroom with her friends listening to the lecture. Unlike Taz, Ink has her own situation that she can’t share with anyone. She is dealing with a cursed spirit. An ancient one from the Heian era that forced her to make a deal with him so her friends won’t get hurt.

Ryomen Sukuna aka King of Curses aka The One Who Shall Not be Named aka nicknamed Voldermort because hey.....it’s the least he deserve after hunting down her friends and hurting them. Taking Oblivion and Yuuka as prizes and feeding off them. Ink is still angry with him. So maybe....if she learns jujutsu, she might do something about it. 

Hope you won’t get bored when I kick your butt! Ink writing down her notes vigorously

Of course, she made an addition to the deal that Sukuna must protect Taz since they’re going to be leaving in four months. So she needs to be prepare and uphold her end of the deal, keeping Sukuna entertained. 

Meanwhile her friends were raising hands and asking questions about jujutsu sorcery as they look to be interested. 

For @the-silver-peahen-residence

[the-silver-peahen-residence]

||The Misadventures of Phoenix and Shadow Chimera Sorcerer Part 17: Equal Punishment for all part 2||

Hi dears. I'm back and I'm going to add another part or chapter to this little mini series. It's time for part 17. So lets see what chaos has happened today?

----- Chapters of Adventure so far --------

||Previous chapters of Chapters 6-13||

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

((Your reading part 17))

||Drabble Summary||

After the first punishment from Megumi, Nobara, Yuji, and Kisho were trying to behave. However, thanks to learning about using the fireworks they now want to use them more in the missions. Right under Megumi's nose but it seems they got caught. What will happen now? read to find out.

||Warning||

~A angry shadow sorcerer

~Punishment

~destruction might be present in this

||Muses in this drabble||

Taz Hellion, Kinie, , Daichi/Eito belongs to my friend and amazing rp partner@chunibyo-x-sorcerer that is a side blog owned by @demon-blood-youths

Ryomen Sukuna, Yuji Itadori, Megumi Fushiguro, Maki Zenin, and Nobara Kugisaki belong to Jujtusu Kaisen but also to me due to rping them as muses. While the same for Miko Yotsuya and Hana Yurikawa from the anime series/manga series Mieruko-chan but also to me due to rping as them as muses.

((Note: This drabble will have heavy grammar mistakes and errors but this was written for fun. I hope you understand but also enjoy please.))

It was another nice day at the school, even for many of the students that was relaxing on this summer day. During this time, Gojo Satoru was happily eating a cake he got from the shop today while smiling.

"Ahhhh what a beautiful day. The sun is shining, the birds are singing...." he said hearing the birds chirping along like nothing was-that was when a few screams were heard in the distance. "And students screaming in peril...wait wha?" Gojo blinks to look left and right wondering where that came from only to see three of his students running tired but scared out of their minds.

"What do we do, what do we do, what do we do!?" Nobara said panicing while crying.

"I don't know! We need a plan to get away before he finds us!" Yuji said.

"I know! I think we can try to hide but we-"

"NO! We need to find out who snitched on us!" Nobara said mad.

"Uhhh you three alright?" The three blinks to look seeing Gojo sensei waving with a smile. "Here to enjoy the day too?"

"GOJO SENSEI YOU HAVE TO SAVE US! MEGUMI'S PISSED!" Kisho said in a panic crying. This made the teacher blink to tilt his head.

"Hmm? Awww Megumi is angry again? Wait..what did you guys do?" he asked.

"We uhhh...sorta used fireworks during our missions but we kept it under wraps. We don't know who told him!!!" Yuji said.

"Ohhhhhhhh...I remember that report. That was pretty fun." he snickered but the three sighed.

"Though..where is Megumi?" Gojo asked but before the three could speak they heard a loud shout.

"GUYS!!! I KNOW YOUR OUT THERE SOMEWHERE! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU!? YOUR GOING TO MAKE YOUR PUNISHMENTS EVEN TWICE AS WORSE WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!!"

"...o.o..."

" T-T"

"You have to help us Gojo sensei please! Were too young to die!" Kisho said.

"Hmmmm..I might be able to help but...maybe if you guys just accept the punishment it won't be as bad. XD"

"....Not helping Sensei.." Yuji and Nobara said before something crashes into the ground. The three tense looking seeing Totality there as he howls out loudly.

"SHIT SHIT SHIT! RUN! RUN AWAY!!" Kisho said running with Nobara and Yuji following as well. Gojo blinks to see them gone but shrugs happily eating his cake he got. A smile with a happy noise leaves him.

"So yummy~"

~~~~~Meanwhile~~~~~

"D..do you think we should at least help them? I know Megumi is mad but..I never seen him this mad before." Taz Hellion was worried seeing Megumi looking left and right. He already sent out Nue and Totality to find the three so he can give them a more worse punishment but MIko and Yuria was worried.

"I..I don't know if we can..." Yuria said but shows a sweatdrop on the side of her head. "And I don't know if we can even save the three from his wrath this time."

"...Maybe we can try to calm h..him down?" Miko suggested.

"Ummmm..." Both Taz and Yuria looks at her then at Megumi who was still angry. "W..we can try.." So they walk over to a very angry Megumi.

"Ummm big brother Megumi? I know your a..angry but maybe you should c...calm down?" Taz said worried that Megumi heard her voice to look at her. His anger was gone from his face seeing her, Miko, and Yuria that he goes to pet her head. "???"

"Don't worry Taz, I'm not that mad. Just wanna talk to them for a bit. Don't worry. Besides, I wish they were behaved like you, Yuria, and Miko." he said admiting that it leaves the three to blink. Even Kinie knew he was furious on the inside. Just hiding that from the three.

'Well, at least his anger is not towards us. Even I know better than to mess with him.' she said laying in her tree under the shade. It was nice in her domain.

'Not helping Kinie...' Taz thought seeing Megumi calm with her. "Now, you three should run along, I'm going to go find them and just talk okay?" he said.

"Uhh o..okay.." they said seeing Megumi going to find them but when facing away, his angry expression shows as he rushes off. He left Taz with Miko and Yuria who looks to one another then at Megumi leaving.

"..You know if he finds them, they are so dead.." Yuria said.

"Y..Yeah...I know." Taz said praying they will be okay.

~~~~~~In a hidden area in the school grounds~~~~~~

"Okay, I think we can hide here for a while before he finds us. But we still need to find out who snitched on us!" Nobara hissed at the two but they were hiding somewhere while Kisho and Yuji were nervous.

"But we don't know who! Right now it's too dangerous to even go anywhere. Maybe we can wait it out till he calms down?" Kisho said.

"But for how long? You saw how pissed he was!" Yuji cries shaking Kisho who got dizzy. "Were so fucked man, so fucked! T_T"

"Yuji, your making me dizzy! @_@" Kisho yelps trying to calm him down. But Nobara smacks Yuji up side his head to stop him.

"Will you calm down!? Look, all we need to do is keep away from Megumi till he chills out. I'm sure after this he will be cool again. No worries! I'm sure after he does, this will blow over." she said.

"And how are you sure?" They asked even with Yuji crying scared and Kisho having swirls in his eyes dizzy from the shaking.

"I just know because I-"

That's when a very angry growl was heard, something breaks down the classroom door startling the three. Standing there was a very angry Megumi who was looking right at them. The three of their eyes widen now hugging one another shaking in fear.

"There you three are!"

"Uhh oh shit-"

"Ummm Hi Megumi! Fancy meeting you here. We just uhhh-"

"Save it. I want to know why you three were using fireworks again? Didn't we agree that you wouldn't use them on missions again?" he asked, demanding a answer from one of them.

"...W..we know but.....we can explain. They help a lot in the mission even being more careful this time! Please, we just wanted to make it quick and easy with no hassle!" Yuji said waving his arms even if he was terrified right now.

"Is that so?"

"It is! come on guys say something to back me up!" Yuji said as Nobra was crying afraid.

"I......I got no words to say!" she said.

"I'm still dizzy but we are more careful this time! We swear!" Kisho said.

"........" Megumi said nothing towards this but this only leads him to close his eyes. "Is that so?"

"Ummm yes?" the three said sweating bullets right now. But how would Megumi take it? Slowly sighing he didn't open his eyes.

"You know? I think I understand fully." he said.

"Y..You do?" Yuji said lowering his hands.

"Of course! How could i have been so blind! I get you three wanted to use them to speed up the mission. Even if it's risking fires, destroyed properties and items, and risk of someone being hurt. I get it now!"

"...." Nobara didn't like how he said that. Not at all.

"So...." He then opens his eyes showing that disturbing smile on his face while looking at them. "Here is my reaction to it."

Seconds later, the three screams as the inside of the classroom was swarmed with angry rabbits. However, Nobara and Kisho saw Yuji caught as he was crying.

"WAIT MEGUMI PLEASE! NOT THE RABBITS AGAIN!"

"Don't worry Yuji..it won't hurt. It's just three times more painful than last time." he said happy while showing that creepy smile. Yuji was pale seeing the red eyes of the rabbits surrounding him as he looks.

"KISHO!! NOBARA! SAVE ME!"

"......" To them they quickly dash off.

"SORRY YUJI!" Kisho said running.

"YOUR ON YOUR OWN!" she said.

"HEY!!"

"Oh don't worry, their next so..enjoy your punishment." he said as the rabbits jump him.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!"

"One down...two more to go." Megumi said as he had some of the rabbits chase them. Now Nobara and Kisho were running down the hallway passing a few empty classrooms. Maki was reading something but as she was drinking something she saw both Nobara and Kisho dash by her.

"Huh???"

"Hi Maki, if you see Megumi, you didn't see us! bye!" she said quickly not stopping.

"Wait what?" she saw the two gone but that's when she sees the rabbits to blink but they look around before guessing. "If your looking for them..they went that way." she said pointing. The rabbits goes in that direction but Maki sighed.

"Sorry guys..I don't want to be a target to a pissed off Megumi. Nope. Not going to leave from this spot." she said going to reading again. Outside, Nobara and Kisho were panting looking around to run or hide.

"We need a plan here! What do we do!?" Kisho said in a panic.

"Hold on, I'm thinking!" she said looking left and right however, she thinks blink. "I think I got something but you trust me right?"

"Uhhh yeah I do!"

"Good!" As she nods, that's when Totality shows up growling at them. Kisho and Nobara tense to back up but they were nervous.

"E..easy Totality..good boy...." she said laughing nervously. "Alright here is the plan Kisho just follow my lead." she whispered.

"Okay.."

He knew Nobara had some good ideas so this one couldn't be bad right? Seconds later, she grabs Kisho and lifts him up.

"TAKE HIM AS MY SACRIFICE!!"

"WHAT!?! O.O!!"

'Wait, she can't be serious can she?! She can't be!!' Kisho screams in his head as she threw Kisho to Totally's paws and he winces from that. However, he tenses seeing him. "Uhhh g..g..good boy..good boy-Nobara!!"

"SORRY KISHO! I'LL PAY YOU BACK LATER!" she said running off in high speed.

"NOBARA YOU TRAITOR! HOW COULD YOU!? T_T" he shouted before he felt Totally pick him up by his maw and drags him to Megumi. "NO TOTALITY NO!! PLEASE I DON'T WANT TO DIE! NOOOOOOO!!"

Nobara knew she made a risky choice but she would be home free while running and hiding now. She panted now in a room alone only to sigh.

"Sorry you two...but Megumi is not getting me this time! I don't want to be punished again even with the icky slime again." she shudders grossed out. "But at least a beauty like me will survive!" she said happy like nothing was wrong. However, she was dead wrong.

"You really think so?" said someone behind her.

"Of course! I know I'm smart because Megumi didn't catch me! X3"

".....You might wanna recheck that statment.."

That's when she tenses to sweat worse slowly turning her head sweating even worse. Standing behind her was a scary Megumi looking down at her.

"....Oh shit.."

"Hello Nobara..." he said as she quickly crawls away from him but saw the slimy frog tongue show up again. "Oh no NOT AGAIN! Megumi please not the frog again!" she cries but she felt the tongue wrap around her ankle to stop him as she was crying shaking in fear.

"Sorry Nobara..it's your punishment..this should teach you and the other idiots to listen.....but it won't hurt for too long." he said.

"B..but I'm a girl! You wouldn't hurt a pretty girl like me right-"

"You used that before you think it would work again?" he said.

"........M..Maybe?" she said laughing scared. Her response was being dragged back into the dark screaming for help. The three were screaming for mercy and help but many sweatdrops not wanting to face Megumi's wrath.

Later that evening, the three were caught but shaking in fear. Yuji was beaten up by the rabbits. Kisho was crying being bruised up by Totality before the rabbits even Nue joined in. And Nobara shaking as she was coated in slime again with worms inside.

Taz, Miko, and Yuria felt bad for them but Kinie and Sukuna was laughing their butts off from the funny show they got. Megumi sighed but he felt better to look at the three tapping his foot.

"Now, what did we learn?"

"N..Not to use f..fireworks in missions.." the three said crying.

"And???"

"A..and to not keep secrets from you.."

"Good.." he said feeling better.

"You know, this was not too bad right guys? At least you learned your lessons." Gojo laughed as Kisho, Nobara, and Yuji looks at him then at one another. In a moment, the three falls back passed out with swirls in their eyes twitching.

Yeah, they learned alright but what's stopping them from doing it again? NO one will know.

[honeypleasejustkillme]

i thought i was at my lowest but holy shit it gets lower

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Sweats nervously…

Positively DBT - BPD, Autism, ADHD Peer Support

[borderlinereminders]

Self-Soothing

Self-Soothing skills are mostly physical techniques that use different senses. This is one of the distress tolerance skills. Different things work for different people, but the goal is to use one (or more) of the five senses to give yourself a comfortable experience when you are feeling in distress.

(These are also really great ideas for grounding!)

Here are some examples to try, but don't hesitate to add your own!

Vision:

Go visit a place you love (a museum, aquarium, maybe the beach, or a trail/view point you love.)

Watch a slideshow of your favourite pictures

Look at an aesthetic collage/board you made

Light a candle and watch the flame flicker and the wax gradually melt.

Find a video you like like a wood stove burning, or maybe rain or snow falling.

Touch:

Use a stim toy that you enjoy that has an interesting texture (slime, soft things, etc).

Pet or cuddle your pet!

Hold a favourite blanket, or maybe a stuffed animal.

Take a warm bubble bath

Lay in the grass

Hearing:

Put on your favourite music

Use an auditory stim toy you enjoy (pop tubes, snapperz, etc.)

Listen to nature sounds

Listen to your pet snoring

Go to a park and listen to the sounds of children laughing and playing

Taste:

Have a nice cup of tea, hot chocolate, coffee, etc

Suck on a hard candy

Chew on gum

Eat one of your favourite snacks

Cook a favourite meal

Go grab a favourite drink from somewhere

Smell:

Light a scented candle and focus on the smell

Use incense

Use your favourite body spray/perfume

Go for a walk somewhere where you can smell something you enjoy like the ocean, or fresh baking at the bakery

Bake or cook something to smell it in the oven

Set up a new air freshener

We sometimes feel like we don't deserve these comforts, or it's hard for us to self-soothe on our own without someone to help us. You absolutely deserve these comforts, and while it's valid to get help from others, being able to work on self-soothing for ourselves can be really beneficial to us and our relationships. I made a deal with myself that I will try self-soothing first and then reach out for help if needed after I make a solid effort on my own. The comfort that I still have the option to reach out makes me more willing to try to self-soothe on my own.

If possible, make yourself a goal to try a new self-soothing technique a week to try when you aren't in distress to see how it feels! Trying these distress skills when we aren't in distress can be really helpful to us being able to use them in distress. When you are trying them, make sure to try and focus solely on the technique. If you are using a taste technique, focus only on the taste and enjoyment of whatever it is. (Using mindfulness techniques to achieve this can be helpful!)

[hello-friends9500]

[atrophiedemotion]

ivantill cafeteria scene analysis

keep in mind that this is fully just my personal opinion and interpretation of the scene okay cool

the cafeteria scene from round 6 has always been really interesting to me, and i've seen a lot of people take it different ways, so i just wanted to walk through my view of it because it's such a telling scene about their dynamic more recently than as kids

the scene starts with a shot of till during the round that looks to be from ivan's pov, showing us what he's seeing in the moment, and flashes back to one of ivan's memories from anakt.

considering the almost identical expressions till is wearing in both shots, it seems to be ivan thinking back to a time he saw till look the way he does in round 6- miserable, hopeless, defeated. like he's given up.

we then see ivan noticing till's apparent resignation and shitty mood (because of course he notices, it's his personal watching till time after all), then getting up to go bother him. i say 'bother him', and it definitely looks like that's what he's doing, but i don't think that's ivan's goal. i think ivan's goal is to comfort, or at least distract till.

despite their juvenile fights, we've never seen ivan actually want to cause till true harm. his lyrics in both black sorrow and cure are caring and reverent, making it apparent that ivan really does just love and care for him and just wants to be able to do things for till. this is furthered ofc by the whole post-club scene where ivan looks absolutely devastated seeing the state till is in.

i always reference back to my mirroring post bc it explains the way i imagine ivan's train of thought, and it applies here again. ivan does not know how to comfort till in a conventional way (probably for a few reasons; till is different from the other students, both in the way he acts and displays his emotions, and in ivan's opinion of him. till is special to ivan, he usually drops his mask around him so meaningless platitudes wouldn't be right) but he does know how to get till's attention on him and out of his own head.

all this being said- what ivan does next:

he swipes his hand across the cut on till's cheek. yeah, i know, definitely not what most people would consider 'comforting their friend' but that's what makes sense to ivan. 'how could i possibly distract him if he seems to ignore me most of the time?' (for now looking past the fact that till actually seems comfortable in ivan's quiet company, ivan's too single-focused to realize that)

and, well, i mean. he's right. till gets visibly disgruntled. he doesn't exactly look pissed as much as he looks caught the hell off guard, but it grabs his attention.

ivan, on the other hand, looks almost fond to me. i don't know, i just don't really think he looks smug even though i'm assuming that might be the general consensus. he almost seems a bit soft. to me, it looks like he's adoringly thinking, 'it worked. there, no time to be sad anymore, huh?' he probably is proud of himself for it, but not really in a selfish way.

till, of course, sees that it's ivan who's messing with him, and turns away.

i've also talked about this but at this age it really does seem like till's mindset when it comes to ivan is something along the lines of, 'oh, it's just ivan. he's fucking weird, that's just how he is' and more or less shrugs it off. he's used to ivan's "quirks" it seems.

this, till looking at ivan only to immediately look away, won't do. he only caught his attention for a few seconds, so i assume ivan's next logical move is to do something that will get an even bigger reaction. (ivan is a logical thinker, after all, at least in my perception of him)

so he. ya know. does that. which really seems like a great way to get himself punched, right? which honestly is also probably his plan. have till explode in anger, forget whatever happened for him to be injured in the first place, and ivan gets his undivided attention for a period of time. a win-win.

and you might be saying "oh, but couldn't ivan have just been doing that selfishly? we know his main goal is to get till to look at him." to which i say, yeah fair. i don't think this was done completely selflessly (i don't think anything ivan does is fully selfless but that's perhaps for another day) at all, he could've gone at it a different unconventional way if it was. but i think he probably sees it as mutually beneficial.

yes, it does seem like a way to show ivan wanting to keep till's eyes and attention on him. an example of how he seeks out till's attention no matter what, but the preceding shot of a hopeless till reminds ivan of this particular interaction for a reason.

there had to have been a motive behind what he did and why he did it then, and what we have to go off of for that is the first three shots. till wearing the same misery on two different occasions and ivan noticing. with that information, it's really not a stretch that this could be ivan's fucked up version of comfort.

[copperbadge]

Hi Sam! I wanted to ask if you feel lately like you've been getting anything positive out of your therapy, because a lot of your initial thoughts about it kind of mirror mine. I'm very logical (except when I'm upset at myself) and very skeptical, so I feel like a therapist either isn't going to tell me anything new, or that I'm going to just disregard it because I can't trick myself into believing things that I just plain don't believe.

But I'm also starting to come to a realization, two years after my ADHD diagnosis and letting go (without therapy!) of most of the executive dysfunction-fueled self worth issues I was having, that I'm kind of Not Okay in other ways. I'm safe —going to work every day and doing my job so I won't lose my livelihood and have never had a self harm urge in my life— But I'm not really okay. I'm having major self esteem issues related to my personality separate from the executive dysfunction that are putting me in a bad place. I don't want to take antidepressants for reasons I won't go into but that means my other option is therapy and... I don't know if I'm a person that therapy will actually work on. I found a lot of validation in some of your perspectives, about affirmations being bullshit and "mindfulness" exercises feeling impossible and useless, about not having an inner monologue and how that might be causing issues with traditional methods. So I was just wondering, do you feel like therapy is working now that you've been in it longer?

I've wasted a lot of money on "elective" (and ultimately useless, back to square one) medical nonsense this year and I'm not eager to waste more, but I've also met my insurance deductible so it's the best time to try it if I'm going to.

I mean, it depends on the modality a little but I don't think trying basic talk therapy can hurt, as long as you find a decent therapist. And it's better to try it now when you're feeling Mostly Okay than waiting until you are Really Not Okay. But this entire paragraph comes with a lot of context so....

A lot of what I talked about in terms of struggling with mindfulness, etc. was less related to the therapy I am still in than it was to the DBT class I took at Therapist's suggestion. We were both aware that she was basically throwing stuff at the wall to see what stuck, and while it was an interesting class I don't think for me it was helpful. As you mention, I struggled with affirmations and visualization since neurologically I'm not really set up for those; I don't think they're objectively bullshit but I do think there's an assumption within the mental health industry that they will have function for everyone and that's simply untrue, and the expectation that it will is very damaging. I also struggled with the physical-intervention aspects (called TIPP usually) which didn't work at all for me and felt frankly like doctor-approved self harm. DBT can get very culty, which set off a ton of red flags for me -- possibly false flags, but they still waved real big.

And that's because I also have a lot of trust issues surrounding therapy. To the point where, the minute one of the people running the DBT class made actually quite gentle fun of me for asking a question he couldn't answer, I checked out on anything he said. We were learning about a DBT concept called Wise Mind and I asked, "If wise mind is an identifiable mental state, how do we know if we're in it?" and when he couldn't quite answer beyond "It's different for everyone" I said, "But if we know it's real there must be some kind of common denominator, a measurable data point," and he said "Well, Sam, you're not going to levitate" and the rest of the class laughed. Sorry bud, this is almost certainly an over-reaction, but I'm me and you lost me when you came at me instead of just admitting you didn't know. (Also it turns out I just live in Wise Mind like 80% of the time which is one reason I couldn't tell.)

But basic talk therapy outside of DBT is just...you talk at someone about your problems and come up with ways to try and solve them, which is a lot more straightforward and way less frustrating. You have to be an active participant, you have to both have a goal and be willing to discuss reaching it, but that goal can be as simple as just "figure out what my mental health goals should be" at first. You don't have to learn like, vocabulary for it.

The thing is, while I have seen some improvement in regulation issues, I also struggle with basic talk therapy. Most people, and this blew my mind, see measurable improvement in nine to eighteen therapy sessions. A lot of people don't go long-term, they just are having a moment and get help getting through the moment and then can disengage, with their therapist's approval.

I was in therapy consistently from the age of nine to eighteen and only stopped because I reached legal majority and physically refused to go.

Not one minute of those nine years did I want to be there. And, because none of the three therapists I saw across those years actually explained to me why I was there or how therapy worked, for me it felt like "Your punishment for having feelings is to speedrun every feeling you had this week in an hour, to a stranger." There was also what my current therapist believes to be some extremely unethical behavior going on, which didn't help.

So it has taken actually a lot of time to get to a place where I would even allow her to understand what help I need. I've been in therapy for about a year (generally weekly but there have been some gaps) and it has only recently gotten deeper than very basic interpersonal problem-solving.

Like, two weeks ago I told her, "I had a thought this week that I couldn't tell you about something I was doing because then you'd have material on me" (meaning blackmail material) "and that's a fucked-up thing to think." And once I'd actually identified it as fucked up I had zero issue telling her about it, wasn't even nervous as I did so. Who's she going to tell? She's literally legally constrained from telling.

I think well over half of what she does is either validate that whatever emotion I'm having is normal, affirm my reactions so I don't keep believing I behaved weirdly, or praise something I've done that was a positive act. Does this work? Not always, because I'm unfortunately very aware that it's part of her job to do those things. But yeah, sometimes. Even if you don't fully believe it, "Hey that was a really smart move" is nice to hear. Sometimes she helps me come up with a plan for stressful future events or (rarely) behavior modification, and sometimes she either provides me with research or points me towards research I can do on my own. We don't do meditation or affirmations or stuff like that.

Like, last week I brought up the fact that I hadn't really ever thought about how if I have a disability that causes emotional dysregulation and I got it from my parents, they also likely had undiagnosed emotional dysregulation when raising me. So she said I should look into research on children with emotionally dysregulated parents. I was pretty annoyed by what I found (the ONE TIME adults are the focus instead of the kids is the ONE TIME I needed to learn about the kids, really?) but it led to something that was both informative and upsetting, so we discussed that. And when I was stumped about how to move forward with the information, she suggested that my general coping mechanism of writing about it was probably a good plan.

(At which point I just silently advanced my powerpoint presentation to the next slide, where I had a series of quotes from the Shivadh novels where Michaelis, acting as a parent, repeatedly does the exact opposite of the upsetting thing, because I realized even before the meeting that it's an ongoing theme in my work whenever I deal with people being parents. It's a good thing she has a sense of humor and also that I do.)

So yeah. Going into therapy you have to be ready to reject a therapist if you don't like them or if they get weird and pushy, you have to be ready to be a self-advocate, but you are the client; it shouldn't be super difficult to find someone who can at least walk you through what you want from it and agree not to do the stuff you don't want, and if you want to stop going you just...stop going.

Good luck, in any case! I hope you get what you need, whether or not that ends up being therapy.

[softgrlfriend]

Me n my sky photos against the world... ☁️

[theweirdwideweb]

DBT taught me something so crazy this week. As always I've been struggling with my sobriety and battling strong urges. Yesterday in group therapy we talked about mindfully observing thoughts. We practiced imagery of a thought coming in through one door in a room and going straight out the other. We can watch our thoughts that way. We also talked about how we are not our thoughts. As I've learned through many failed attempts at meditation, thoughts are just random impulses that appear regardless of whether or not you call them. I thought "you are not your thoughts" was a little obvious, but I tried it today with my substance abuse urges. When I'd think about getting high I'd imagine a white room and that thought coming in one door and going out another. I'm the person sitting in the room. The thought came and went and I saw it, but I was still in the room. Sometimes passing thoughts trick us into thinking they are our own voices. A healthier way to interact with our minds is to remember we are the person in the room watching thoughts appear and disappear.

[demon-blood-youths]

For @the-silver-peahen-residence for the Birthday Bash

“Thanks! I’m glad!” They’re almost there. She reads a text from Navarro that they’re almost ready. Ink knows how to buy time. “Anyway....how are you been since we been in Japan? I wish you can come with us! There was a lot of strong and awesome people in Japan. Plus the places...the onsens, the food and the shrines are so awesome!” Ink tells Jinx.

-----

Oblivion smiles a little. “Nice. I’m thinking of visting you on the island so we can hang out. I can bring my switch console and all that so we can play video games together.” She sees a text from Navarro that they’re getting things done. They’re ready.

“Let’s get going. The lunch rush is now over. We might get free tables.” She said.

-----

“Nice.” Jaron nods at the cake. “Navarro! The cake is ready!”

“Great! Both teams are arriving!” Said Navarro. “Everyone got their party poppers and all that?!”

[the-silver-peahen-residence]

||The Misadventures of the Phoenix and the Shadow Chimera Sorcerers Part 11-Little adventure of Yuji and Taz||

Hi dears,. This is Part 11 of this Drabble series I'm writing with my amazing friend. It seems we have another adventure this time so lets see what is going on today. To see where we are now, the chapters are down below.

---- Previous Parts -----

Part 6

Part 7

Part 8

Part 9

Part 10

((Your reading part 11))

---Drabble Summary ---

It seems another adventure is going on with the students of Jujutsu High. However, it involves watching over little Taz and Little Yuji. However, when Sukuna and Kinie went to get some snacks, it was up to the others to watch them or would they? Curious to what happened, read to find out.

||Warning||

~Worried students

~Missing toddlers but they were fine

~Two very angry parents

||Muses in this drabble||

Taz Hellion, Kinie, , Daichi/Eito belongs to my friend and amazing rp partner@chunibyo-x-sorcerer that is a side blog owned by @demon-blood-youths

Ryomen Sukuna, Yuji Itadori, Megumi Fushiguro, Maki Zenin, and Nobara Kugisaki belong to Jujtusu Kaisen but also to me due to rping them as muses

((Note: This drabble will have heavy grammar mistakes and errors but this was written for fun. I hope you understand but also enjoy please.))

"Your going where?" Daichi, Megumi, Nobara asked seeing Sukuna and Kinie standing in front of the three while hearing little Yuji laughing while gently booping little Taz's nose who smiled blushing.

"You heard us. Me and Kinie are going into town to get some new stuffed toys for the little ones. I'm getting a tiger for little Yuji.." he said.

"And I'm getting a panda for little taz. Though, I already got her a quoll one but I'm getting another one......" Kinie said. Both the king and his princess were wearing some regular clothing and it seems they would do some shopping.

"So we are asking you to watch over the little ones for a few hours. We shouldn't take too long to get what we need and come back." she said.

"Ohhh so you want us to baby sit them? Sure, we can do that!" Nobara said smiling with Megumi and Daichi nodding. They wouldn't mind watching them. Even seeing the two playing.

"Good. We should be back real soon while heading into town." she said to them. As the two were getting ready to head out.

"Don't worry you guys, we will watch over Yuji and Taz till you come back!" Daichi smiled happy to the two but Kinie remembers something.

"Oh, and one thing.." she said.

"Uhhh yeah?" Daichi asked seeing Kinie looking to them.

"You guys better be sure to keep a good eye on them. You are responsible to being sure little Taz and little Yuji stay safe and don't get hurt..." she glares at Daichi but only looks to them as they tense.

"She's right. We don't want anything happening to the little ones so just be sure you keep a good eye on them. Because if we find out anything happens to them or if a single hair is missing on their heads." Sukuna grabs Daichi's shirt and lifts him up to look dead in his eyes seeing red eyes. Kinie even had her dark spear showing while glaring at them.

"You all will regret it." they said in a deadly tone scaring Daichi and them.

"U..Uhhh r..r...right! Of course, you both don't have to worry. We'll be sure they are safe." Daichi said that Sukuna looks to him but drops him as he falls on his butt.

"OW!"

"Anyway, you can contact us with these phones Gojo gave us. Just keep a eye on them...we will see you soon." he said but saw little Taz and Yuji playing as they waddle over to Kinie and Sukuna who picked them both up.

"Papa! Papa! P...Pway?" Taz coos smiling at him while holding his cheeks.

"Pway Pway!" Yuji smiled nuzzling Kinie's cheek.

"Oh you two. We have to go out for a little bit but we will be back to play with you. You and your brother be good little ones okay. And Yuji, keep a eye on your little sister okay?" Kinie said but he blinks only to nod. "Good boy."

"And Taz, be sure you listen to your little brother okay?" Sukuna said but she blinks to nod, gigging while hugging him. The group blink seeing how cute they were! They really were the only ones that can calm Kinie and Sukuna down. Seeing this, both Kinie kisses Yuji's cheek and Sukuna kissing Taz's cheek before setting them both down.

"We'll be back. Be good you two." They said smiling while they giggle waving to them. The curses smiled waving to the little ones but they glared at the others to insure they would be safe. However, they stood up to head out and close the door to see Daichi sigh.

"Yeah...still scary." Nobara said but seeing little Yuji stand up but helps little Taz stand too so they can go and play with Miko and Yuria seeing how adorable they were.

"Alright guys, lets just be sure Taz and Yuji are taking care of. Lets just do our best!" Daichi said.

"We'll be fine, Daichi. Though, lets be sure they have what they can while Sukuna and KInie are gone. With that, the group goes to babysit Taz and Yuji. For a while, they already fed them, cleaned them, and made sure they were safe and protected. Even Eito was watching over the two while they were being gentle while petting and hugging the spirit. Eito chirps nuzzling against the two.

"Awwwwww, so cute!" Gojo said taking more pictures.

"Again with the pictures.." Nanami sighed looking at him but Daichi, Megumi, and Nobara sighed. Well, since they became kids, he was enjoying this. Though, so far they already were alright and told Kinie and Sukuna the two were okay.

So far so good. It was not like anything could go wrong right? Well....after a few hours, the group was resting up while making sure the two were safe.

"I'm telling you. If you just add a theme song it's fine! It'll make you look cooler-"

"I told you a thousand times Kisho, I'm NOT adding a theme song!" Megumi argues with the girls going to get some blankets for Taz and Yuji to take their nap. The two were playing in the room with Yuji giggling to pet his sister's head again. All she did was giggle and smiles.

"But why not!? You'll be cool just like me! X3"

"NO!" he shouted at him as the two argued now. This made little Yuji blink confused to why they were arguing now. He didn't know why but he was looking only to keep by his sister. As for Taz, she was giggling hugging her quoll plush before the two hear a soft baaa from somewhere.

"???" They looked around before seeing the cursed spirit Willson? What could he want? He looks to the kids but thought they were cute! He even smiled to see the little ones eyes sparkling seeing the goat ghost.

"I TOLD YOU I'M NOT DOING THAT!" Megumi said.

"OH COME ON, IT'S COOL! YOU'LL EVEN GET NOTICED BY MANY PEOPLE EVEN OUR CLASSMATES- "

"I SAID NO!!"

He and Denji kept arguing back but didn't know the little ones were now following after Willson who was letting them. He was happy while the two kids laughing softly reaching for him. This is when the girls came back to the room.

"Hey guys, were back with the blankets. Taz and Yuji should be ready for their na-" As Nobara speaks she stops seeing the two arguing. Miko and Yuria blinks confused.

"Uhhh.."

"WHY ARE YOU TWO ARGUING!?" Nobara shouted seeing them stop to look but Megumi sighed.

"Nothing. This idiot was suggesting I should get a theme song but I said no." he Megumi said.

"He has no taste!" Daichi said with the girls sighing.

"Uh huh. Come on, we need to put the little ones down for a nap." Nobara said. "So where are they?" she asked.

"They should on the play mat." Megumi said pointing so the girls go to do that but when entering the room they stop.

"........"

"What?" Daichi asked.

"Megumi?....Daichi?...their not in here." Nobara said as the two blink to get up heading over.

"What are you talking about? They are in there. Are you trying to-" As Megumi looks he tenses seeing the play room was empty. Daichi saw but his eyes widen.

"W...what?!? But they were here! We know it!" Daichi said rushing in. "Taz!? Yuji!?" DAichi said looking around for them as the girls did and Megumi too. As they were panicking, Willson was happily playing with the little ones while he was leading the two to a play area but he would keep them safe while Taz and Yuji was happily following him.

~~~Back inside~~~~

"Oh no, oh no no no no NO!" Daichi was sweating now looking like he was going to be sick. "I can't believe this! WE LOST TAZ AND YUJI!! SUKUNA AND KINIE ARE GOING TO FUCKING KILL US!" he said crying.

"Calm down! I'm sure they are around somewhere. They couldn't have gone far." Megumi said.

"You two were to watch them while we went to get the blankets for them! How could you lose them!?" Nobara shouted to bonk the two as Megumi winces.

"It wasn't my fault! Daichi started the stupid argument so it's his fault!"

"NO! I was just trying to tell you a theme song would make you look-"

"G..GUYS! This is not the time! We have to find them before Sukuna and KInie get back! Who knows what they will do if they find out!" Yuria said worried.

"I think I might know what he might do and It won't be pretty." DAichi said shaking.

"Look, lets tell everyone in school to keep a eye out for the two. They have to be around here somewhere. We can find them before-" As he said this, Daichi's phone rings as he looks to see who it was. His face pales showing it was Sukuna and Kinie.

"What's wrong?"

"I..I..It's them! Sukuna and Kinie is calling! What do I do!?" he said.

"Just answer the phone!" Megumi said but DAichi whines not wanting to but gulps to calm down and picks up. "Uhhhh Hello?"

'Hey brat. It's me. Were just calling to check on the pups. Are they alright?'

"Yeah, of course! Their fine. We ummm...just put them down for a nap." Daichi said but he was scared.

'I see. Well, I'm just calling to say we should be back in a little bit. Kinie is looking for some new bows for Taz but I got Yuji some hats. It should be another two hours before we come back.'

"Right. Thanks for the heads up! We'll be sure to do that!" he said loudly but Sukuna blinks.

'Why are you being so loud? Your shouting...'

"S..Sorry, just ummm.....excited. Anyway, we'll see you two later!" he said to hang up.

~~~~~~~

Sukuna blinks to lower the phone. "Weird." he said but heard Kinie laughing. He looks seeing her holding some cute little bows for Taz.

"Did you find something princess." Sukuna said even if other women blushed seeing how hot Sukuna looked! He looked pretty built for a guy.

"I did! Taz would look cute with this!" she said showing them. Sukuna looks but smiled.

"I think she would be three times cuter than she is." he said to Kinie who smiled being adorable. He chuckled to pet her head while KInie smiled. "Oh, I forgot. How are the pups?"

"They are taking their naps. I think by the time we get back, they should wake up. So, we should hurry up and head back." he said.

"Of course my king." she said happily finishing up as he follows her. Though, he was helping with holding the things in a basket.

~~~~Back at Jujutsu High~~~~~

Everyone is on high alert trying to find the little ones. They have looked in all the classrooms, outside, teacher's lounge, hidden spots, even other locations and no luck. Where could they be!?

"Ohhhh their going to kill us. Their going to kill us!!" Daichi cries looking cared. "What are we going to do?! What are we gonna tell them!?" he said.

"Stop panicking. The little ones have to still be in school. We just have to keep looking." Megumi said.

"But how long!? Sukuna and Kinie will be back soon! They will destroy the school if they find out!" he said but Megumi sighed. He saw the girls running over worried but tired. "Any luck?"

"No. We looked in the cafeteria but nothing." Nobara said.

"We checked the classrooms with the second grade and nothing." Miko said worried.

"Were still looking around but..what if they walked off the school grounds!?" Yuria said that made Daichi twitch but slowly think.

"O..O..Out..o..o..of s...s..school grounds?" he meeps but his eyes became dizzy and falls back to faint. Yeah, they were going to kill him. Megumi sighed to see that.

"Great.......Come on, lets keep looking." Megumi said while they just keep looking. The groups were scattered all over but they had no idea Willson was watching them. Even carrying them on his back to give them little rides. And yes, they are still on school grounds. Little Yuji laughed having fun but held onto his sister Taz who was making silly noises riding his back even petting his head.

"Goooo....f..fun!" she smiled.

"Baaaaa...sooo cute!" he said happily to reach and nuzzle the two who smile and hug him back. Yeah, they were having fun with him. Not knowing the chaos going on right now. They looked everywhere for the last few hours till it was later in the afternoon. Megumi was tired but was upset seeing they didn't find them.

Nobara was worried hoping they were alright. Daichi did wake up but he was pacing left and right. They didn't find the two and it was already getting dark.

"I don't get it. They should be around but no! Where could they be!?" Daichi said but Megumi looks to him.

"I don't know. We should have watched them better then they wouldn't be missing. All because you wanted to argue about stupid theme songs."

"Theme songs are NOT dumb!" he said.

"Guys not now! I just hope the others are having better luck..." Yuria said but they might have to tell Sukuna and Kinie they lost the pups. They were not going to be happy.

"So..h..how should we tell them?" Daichi said worried as the group thinks but it's when they heard the door open making him tense.

"Guys! were back!"

Sukuna and Kinie returned.

'Oh on..' Daichi said.

"Sorry we were late. We had to get some other things for the little ones but we hope they were good." Kinie said showing the bag with Sukuna doing the same. However, the two blink seeing the group tired or something.

"What is wrong? Did the pups tire you all out? That's a shame. They are pretty quick for little pups." Kinie smiled. "So, are they still taking their nap?"

"...."

"Is something wrong?" Sukuna asked but Megumi sighed to look at them.

"Sukuna..Kinie...we have something to tell you.." he said.

"Tell us? What is it?" She asked but Sukuna wonders too that Daichi looks scared but sighed.

"W..we......we sorta lost them?" Daichi said nervous but the king and his princess blinks.

"Lost them? What are you talking about?" KInie asked.

"...Lost as in we...lost Yuji and Taz.." Megumi said but Sukuna was shocked that Kinie drops the bag seeing the bows and stuff doll of a panda fall out. She quickly rushes into the play room to check.

"But don't be angry. We been looking for them all day! We are having the others help us try to find them-"

"....WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU FUCKING LOST THEM!? AS IN THEY BEEN GONE SINCE I CALLED!?" Sukuna shouted to make the others wince. He was pissed.

"Y..Yes but please! We didn't mean to-"

"WE GAVE YOU ONE JOB TO DO AND YOU FUCKING LOSE THEM! HOW THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT!?" He shouted.

"It wasn't our fault! It's just me and Megumi got into some argument about him having a theme song and-"

"YOU LOST THE PUPS BECAUSE OF SOME DAMN ARGUMENT!!!" he shouted but Kinie looks to come back but she was quiet. The girls saw her upper face hidden but their was tears? Wait, was she crying?

"........You..YOU IDIOTS!" Kinie barked that her cursed energy shows up in deadly waves but she walks over showing a spear ready to hunt them all down. "HOW COULD YOU LOSE THEM! WHAT IF SOMETHING BAD HAPPENED TO THEM!" she said now crying angry.

"KINIE CALM DOWN! WE DIDN'T MEAN TO-"

"SILENCE! DO YOU KNOW THEY COULD HAVE WANDERED OFF FROM SCHOOL GROUNDS! WHAT IF ANOTHER CURSE GOT THEM!? WHAT IF THEY GOT HURT!? WHAT IF THEY......WHAT IF THEY GOT KILLED!?" she said now tightening the grip on her spear but she looks up to scare them. Her eyes were glowing but the tears were seen. Even Sukuna was worried. He's never seen his princess cry like this.

"KINIE PLEASE-"

"I SHOULD FUCKING KILL ALL OF YOU FOR LOSING HER! AND YUJI TOO! I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR LOSING THE LITTLE ONES!" she shouted.

"KINIE CALM DOWN!" Megumi said but she had her kinfolk surround everyone ready to attack them. "YOU FOOLS DARE LOSE THEM! I WILL BE SURE YOU REGRET THIS! I WILL BE SURE TO MAKE YOU ALL-" As she speaks, someone pulls her back only to be held. She looks up but saw Sukuna quiet.

"Enough princess........please calm down." he said but she was quiet only to cry more that she hid her face sobbing loudly in his chest. Sukuna held her but he looks to the others.

"Give me one reason why I shouldn't curse you all for losing the pups. And it better be a good damn one." he said.

"........W..we don't know we just..the girls were getting blankets for them but...after they did we lost track and...." Megumi couldn't explain knowing even from now, Sukuna was pissed off. He held a crying Kinie to him but he slowly held his other hand like he was going to destroy the room with them in it.

"W..wait Sukuna please! We'll keep looking for them! Please we are sorry!" Daichi said crying.

"......You should be. Though, I'm sure we will make you all suffer for losing them." he said in a dark tone as everyone was ready to defend themselves from a angry Sukuna. His cursed energy was showing around him. However, before he could....

A familiar baaaa was heard to make him blink. The others did too seeing from the window of Willson happily floating over.

"What the..."

"Oh great. What does the damn goat want? I"m not in the mood to deal with you right now!" Sukuna shouted at Willson. However, the goat keeps coming to the window before he floats in but was carrying two little bundles of blankets.

"????"

"Sorry evil king...baaaaaa I was having so much fun with the little pupppssss today. They got tired out after following me to play."

Wait what!?

Kinie's eyes widen to turn and see the blanket. Willson lowers down to set them on a big pillow showing little Yuji asleep with a smile but hugging little Taz to him. It was the pups!

"Ehh!?!" Willson had them all this time!?

"Hold on, how long have you had them!?" Megumi said but the goat looks.

"Huh? Alllllll day. They followed me outside but I kept a watch on them. I was trying to take them back but they wanted to stay. Why, did I miss something?" he asked.

Right away, Kinie goes to the two but she falls on her knees still crying. They were safe. They were back safe and alive. Reaching with a shaky hand, she touches Taz and Yuji's little cheeks as they sleep peacefully happy. Though, they knew it was her to yawn but nuzzle against her hand holding it.

"......." Kinie said nothing but sobs gently reaching to pick them up in her arms to kiss their foreheads.

"Oh thank god your both safe...I was so worry.." she sobs holding them but Sukuna calms down to gently go and hold Kinie with the little ones. He was happy they were safe too. He did look to Willson to say,

"Thank you for watching over them. We heard the others lost them...but thank you for keeping them safe." Sukuna said.

"Your welcome.....I didn't want anything happening to them. But they are alright...I even got them some food from the cafeteria so they were fed too. Even so, I'm going to go sleep now..it was fun playing with them. NIght night.." with that, Willson disappears to do that. Sukuna sees him gone but now looks to Kinie crying but nuzzling the two.

"....Sooooo...were not in trouble are we?" Daichi said.

".......No, your still in trouble....we told you guys to watch them...so your lucky you won't die this night. I think we'll keep a eye on them from now on.." Sukuna said but he picks Kinie up in his arms along with the bags they got for them and leaves to set them down to rest. The others remain in the living room but falls on the ground after the scare.

"...Daichi?"

"Y..Yeah Megumi?" he said.

"The next time or if we get the chance to watch them again..no more talk of theme songs...ever." Megumi said.

"...Deal." he said. Nobara shook her head but she'll write this in for a side mission. Though, she was happy that the two were safe. Meanwhile in a room they were given. Sukuna was holding Kinie who went to sleep but she was holding Yuji and Taz in her arms. He finds it cute to see this almost like he and her had a family. Gently kissing her forehead, he was happy to know the pups were safe.

[ficain1-ficain]

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Autism Meltdown Early Signs

Confusion & brain fog

Dissociation & memory issues

Mutism or speech delay

Paranoid & self-conscious

Higher sensory sensitivity

Increased stimming

Positively DBT - BPD, Autism, ADHD Peer Support

[violentviolette]

i think a lot of people would benefit from internalizing the reality that just because u had a negative emotion doesnt always mean someone else did something wrong

we can be hurt without someone else being to blame for being the epicenter of that hurt. just because something makes us upset or hurts us, doesnt mean the other person made a mistake or should have done something differently or needs to apologize

negative emotions are an inevitable part of life and sometimes they were always going to happen no matter what because of the situation and there was no way to avoid them and thats okay. sometimes there's nothing to be done to fix a negative emotion or prevent it from happening. sometimes people we love and care about are going to hurt us and thats okay. its a part of being human. we will inevitably do the same to them. but just because we were hurt doesnt mean they did something wrong.

and we can take the time and space to be upset about that privately without involving them in our emotions at all. because even when our emotions are triggered by someone else, that doesnt mean they have to answer for them

the world is not divided into victims and perpetrators and sometimes people hurt us when they do the right thing. sometimes everyone can do everything right and we can still get hurt and be upset. that doesnt make them bad people and it doesnt give us the right to blame them for it or hold them responsible

[borderlinereminders]

The Six Levels of Validation:

Listening/Paying Attention: Focus on listening to the other person. Stay in the present moment, and hear them out. Even if you don't agree with what they're saying. Let them have the floor.

Perhaps they're upset with you because you cancelled plans because you were sick.

Restating: Focus on what the person has said, and then re-state and ask something like "is that right?" Make sure to be non-judgmental. You might think their feelings aren't rational, but that doesn't change the fact the other person is feeling them.

In our example, this might mean "I understand that you were very excited to see me and then disappointed when that didn't happen. Is that right?"

Observing: This is where you observe, including the things that are unspoken. Make an educated guess on what is not being said, based on body language. (I'm personally not a big fan of this one because it can be tricky if you interpret something wrong and mention "you seem really angry because you feel betrayed" and that may upset someone. It also isn't easy to read body language. My point of this is that you are valid if you can't do this step, or don't want to. You can still validate someone.)

You might notice your friend's eyes are watering and they keep swallowing. "You seem really hurt and are maybe thinking I don't care about you because I cancelled on you."

Assessing:

Focus on what history tells us and maybe use this to point out how your friend's current response is not effective. Communicate whether the person's behaviour is understandable or not. You can use past experiences to communicate this.

Using another example, maybe your friend skipped a test because they were anxious about it. You might say "It's very normal to be anxious about tests, but you won't have a shot at passing the test if you don't take it."

Compassion

Show compassion for the other person. Even if you think they're completely wrong, treat them as an equal person with their own feelings and experiences. They are a person with their own strengths and weaknesses. Try and believe in them and that they are capable of change.

Say you have a friend that is anxious to go somewhere because her ex might be there, you might say "It is very understandable you are anxious. A lot of people would be in your situation."

Validation is so important in relationships. Even if you don't "get" someone's feelings, it doesn't make them less real to that person. The feelings that person is feeling are very real, regardless of whether they make sense.

Often, people aren't looking for advice or problem solving unless they say it. Validation is a fairly good response if they don't specify what they're looking for.