#SHE USE HIS TREAT
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THE BRIO PARALLEL I LOVE THE MOST!!!!!!! THIS IS SO AWESOME!!!! OMG!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH <33333333333333333333333333
#LIKE#OMG#THIS IS SOOOO AWESOME#AND AMAZING#AND BEAUTIFUL#SHE COPY HIM#SHE USE HIS TREAT#I'M...................#SOBBING#IDIOTS SOULMATES#She is as worst as him#<33333#beth x rio#rio x beth#Brio#junaowatchggs4forthefirsttime#gg rewatch 2022#gg rewatch#ggrewatch2022#ggrewatch#4x14#nbc good girls
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Steddie but it's from Robin’s perspective and she treats Eddie like a feral dog her and Steve adopted.
“Steve he got into the chocolates again.”
“Steve your boyfriend has the zoomies and it's your turn to walk him!”
“You know how you told him that if he licked the candy cane sharp enough he’d end up stabbing himself? Yeah so we’re at the ER can you bring--”
“STEVEN I TOLD YOU not to leave him alone with the GLITTER!"
#she and steve literally had an argument about allowing eddie to sleep in “their” bed when he and eds first started dating#Not only was Eddie not offended by it#he used his big wet eyes on Robin to get her to do it lmao#literal puppy face#she treats dustin similarly except she tells Eddie#to his face#that she respects dustin more#steddie#stobin
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mario + peach is such a good ship istg they’re so good. straight ship so good it feels gay
#smb#mario#princess peach#idk what their ship name is 🫡#mario x peach#no id#giddly’s art#please ignore the goofy side angle i tried. i really did#this is what i get for NEVER using references 🥲#ngl i think peach is bi maybe? but i think mario is just straight. i think he simply loves women#mario is so funny. meet the mustachioed straight cis man and his brother The Fag#bc let’s be real luigi is definitely bi and genderqueer ✋😭 ain’t NO way he don’t have some gender stuff going on#but like. back to mario. i genuinely think he is too lovely and whimsical to NOT treat his bae like the queen she is#he would be such a good lover that people could mistake them for dykes i won’t even lie. just listen. just hear me out#I LIKE THEM OK 💥
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i like him
#somebody needs to keep me 8 metres away at all times or else ill start chewing on him#i just want everyone to know if i end up making a character who happens to resemble harvey in any shape or form#it probably wasnt a coincidence 😐and it will happen again#if i remember maybe ill try getting stardew when it goes on sale.. my friend showed me her farm and she named her chicken after doja cat#or maybe it was nikki minaj i cant remember. and she also said smth about monsters and passing out if you stay out after a certain hour#idk how accurate tht is all i know is the funny fucked up grandpas bed#i read somewhere that harveys supposed to be in his early to mid thirties and i dont have a problem with it but i think itd be very funny#if hes actually younger than he looks hes just a med school postgrad lmao. idk how well that headcanon would hold up since ive#never played the game and idk how often ppl talk about his age or if itsjust an implied thing. i just think its really really funny#im trying to get into the habit of drawing poses so im using reference images to try and build up muscle memory#i found some cute pictures of two ppl playing by the sea shore and it reminded me of xin and sailor so im gonna draw em like that#i havent drawn em in so long..... maybe i should update xins reference since i changed their lore quite a bit#myart#my art#doodles#stardew valley#stardew#sdv#sdv harvey#kinda wanna see him whimper a little bit. as a treat
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me explaining why Will/Elizabeth/Jack love triangle was a perfect little one-movie arc that wasn't present in the final movie because it was never about choosing and instead just about dynamics and character development so they all outgrew it by then
#like first off will and elizabeth are having similar character arcs but in totally opposite directions#he loses himself and gets all sad the further into the world of piracy he gets. she blooms and becomes her best self and excels at it.#and both of their arcs are supervised by jack who is there to make fun of them until it's no longer funny#will is absolutely repulsed by him but also understands him more and more once he realizes he would do anything to get to his goal#elizabeth is absolutely repulsed by him but also wants to BE him. he is what she wishes she could be were she totally free#and her possible attraction to him is treated as FUNNY because it IS VERY RIDICULOUS. like why tf would she want this weird gross guy when#she has actual perfect loverboy will at home. well bc will just doesn't get her. he is sad and lost while she is thriving#and the only one who gets it is the old smelly clown over there. why is the compass pointing at him (bc she wants to be him so bad)#that movie is about the characters not knowing what they want. they are all at a crossroads and have to choose which way to go. so it makes#sense that the main characters have a push and pull dynamic between them!!! c'mon!!!! it is so cool!!!#eernatalk#also i know pirate king elizabeth awakened something in all of us but can i add. the look she gives jack when he stops kissing her bc of th#sound of the shackles. the way she bares her teeth like she is steeling herself for the ''you deserve to die i am not sorry for this''speec#WHEEEWW.... WHEW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Okay, pack it up nerd squad.
#I miss when they used to investigate blood covered hotel suites together.#five billion more scenes of them doing nothing important together please?#this is my treat to myself for making it through my first day back at school#were-dog Adaine anyone?? no??#I watched the live show where she howls with jawbone and tracker and this was the most logical next step#but like think about it please#please. imagine someone traveling hundreds of miles to consult the elven oracle and she is just. a dog.#one day all of my fantasy high designs will be digitigrade#it’s like a reward for being so regular in my day-to-day routine#this is also probably my favorite Riz I’ve ever drawn despite changing almost nothing from what I usually do#this freak is wearing dress-pant shorts? Jesus Christ what is his deal#adaine abernant#adaine o'shaughnessey#riz gukgak#the ball#fantasy high#d20#d20 fantasy high#dimension 20#d20 fanart#fh#fantasy high fanart#fhjy#undescribed#my art
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“oh no people tell me I have no sense of personal space and I'm a man and her unofficial coach what if I've been making her uncomfortable- and Akane is like nah. You're not gonna do anything to me I can feel it. Like hes the only person who can overpower her but he just uses that strength to be there for her” og my god. i need a minute after that ome. god i had a whole long winded analysis of this and i was gonna put it all here but i seriously have no words. this is so real in every possible way and a lil too relatable lmfao
ITMEANS A LOT TO ME OKAY. I too could rsnt but idk where it would go
#Akanidai#Like... the way he thinks putting her first is just a Duh action like of course shes the most important look at her!!!#The way she is used to being on her own and taking care of others but finally someone thinks she's worth putting first ....#The way shes used to being treated badly especially if vulnerable (which is why she never IS) and the way he would just literally die first#Akane being like ok here I am. In his room. At night. Comparatively weak. This is when other guys would take advantage#And hes like hey are you cold? Hungry? I was thinking we could work on your breathing tomorrow. You're doing great at LIFTS!#HE SAYS HES IMPRESSED BY HER STRENGTH BUT HE WANTS HER TO GROW SPIRITUALLY.... he wants her to be her best self....#Why does no one talk about them I love them#an art
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I truly think that one of the biggest tragedies in BEAST in regards to the Akutagawa siblings is that, at the core of it, Ryuunosuke viewed himself as a beast, and showed his love in a way a beast would, while Gin was the only person who ever saw him as human and judged him accordingly. She did not see a beast acting like a beast, the way everybody else did, she saw a human acting like a beast and it’s part of what drove her away.
The ADA saw their rookie detective at his worst, and watched—and continues to watch—him grow from a beast to a human over time. Consumed by hatred and only knowing how to be cruel, and slowly learning how to become human.
Gin saw her brother at his best—the best he could be in their situation—and then watched him grow from a boy to a beast within moments. The scraps of humanity that he had, all disappearing into rage so primal it no longer made him seem human.
#I was unhappy when Gin called her brother a monster in that scene after all his efforts to find her again#because I was treating her like Canon! Gin and not by the different experiences they’ve lived#i always thought that saying that to him was cruel when she’s known him since they were in the slums#but the thing is. He did act like a monster. by human standards he was a monster to others#he mutilated and butchered people even as a child. even if it was done out of love#he had no regards to holding back his brutality and maimed people. even if we understand its cause of how he grew up#he slaughtered countless of mafiosos—perhaps even subordinates under Gin. people who were simply there at the wrong place at the wrong time#I think the dislike of BEAST Gin has greatly to do about perspective#she is not like Dazai or the reader who knows the circumstances or his mind#she is not like the ADA who saw Akutagawa at his worst#and lastly she is not like Atsushi who can understand her brother like he’s her other half. he’s not#akutagawa is effectively a stranger she used to know. someone she is familiar with and has tender feelings for#but not someone that she /knows/. he is not someone that she /understands/.#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bsd akutagawa#ryuunosuke akutagawa#akutagawa ryunosuke#bsd gin#akutagawa gin#gin akutagawa#bungo stray dogs beast#beast#beast akutagawa#beast gin#bsd beast
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listen everyone’s all karnadeli this colindeli that and i get it they’re both so juicy. but let’s set shipping aside for a second because i also need people to be a thousand times more invested in colin and karna being slow burn best friends who come to a gradual understanding of each other and eventually bond over their surprisingly similar traumas and hangups. I want them to gossip over meals and share commiserating glances when the nobility do some stupid rich people shit. I want colin and karna to team up during arguments, and deli to be exhausted because he has to deal with the fact that his skalds have unionized. I want them to quietly have each others backs, even though they’d never fucking admit it if you asked. Are you all seeing my vision.
#dimension 20#the ravening war#karna solara#colin provolone#I’m not the first person to joke about them unionizing but it’s true….we don’t gotta pit two queens against each other y’all#deli….can have two advisors. as a treat.#like obviously there’s still unknowns especially about karnas backstory#but we know she’s used to being considered disposable and has presumably#had to get very good at being useful to survive#and Colin was used by his dad to steal him drinking money#in a country where his true name would have gotten him killed#THEYD GET EACH OTHER#OR AT LEAST I WANT THEM TO
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Tessa fucks me up dude can I just talk about her for a sec? Yeah? Yeah.
She loved those drones. She loved them because they were what she had. She felt sympathy for them when nobody else did. And I like to think there was a little bit of loneliness motivating her as well.
Her mother hated her. She was nothing to her. When her mother scolded her by saying "seems you still can't follow simple orders" her respone was "No, no no! Please!" BEGGING. Begging her mother to believe in her and be kind to her. She got chained up in her room (multiple times btw. At leas tthats implied. the hand she winced at and rubbed is the same hand the chain was on, which means shed be chained up long enough for it to rub her skin painfully. long enough to leave lasting pain.)
She is very connected to these drones, to the point where she kept all the error drones aroud because she LOVED them. She spent time digging them up. HELL SHE TOOK A FAMILY PHOTO WITH THEM DUDE...
Even when Cyn was creepy and scary, she kept her around. She'd rather lock Cyn up than get rid of her. and when n points it out, shes apologetic and hesitant. But we know WHY she did that. Even if it was kind of a sucky move, it was because she didnt wanna have to throw cyn out. and in the end that killed her.
Also she knows J well enough to know what sets her off (enough to. bite the shit out of a chain). She knows them. and she loves them.
I wish we'd gotten to know more about her an N. why is he so clearly her favorite? but thats not relevant ig
also her saying "I've only ever yakked to robots, J!" She has NO human friends. she has nobody to support her other than these robots. these robots who get treated like garbage by her family.
and then she has to watch these robots turn on her. Not just THESE ROBOTS but the three that she loved most. (also im going off what wouldve happened in ep 5 WITHOUT uzi, where n doesnt get out of the swamp, and nobody goes down to the basement)
V first, then Cyn, then J. And we KNOW she loved these three+N especially bc she took a family photo w them, interacted with them more often, and generally just seemed much closer with them.
and what does she get for it? killed. And also its implied by this screenshot that she wasnt ACTUALLY killed by cyn right then
(the scientists, the sword beside her, the footprints, the way shes sitting against the wall, the expression she has. she totally just saw all that shit)
and she cant have been skyn bc the scientists wouldve known. the skinsuit wasnt exactly. hm. pretty.
which means she DID see her whole family+more slaughtered in front of her while she was powerless to stop it. She DID see J violently kill everyone around her. She DID see Cyn kill everyone. And she just has to. Deal with that. And despite all her efforts, the solver took over and cyn killed her. (im assuming tessa died somewhere around when n's mineshaft flashback was like i mentioned b4)
and all the while she was convinced shed lose N, id assume. based on the state of the other drone out there.
And honestly, i think what she got was worse.
also i am team "N knew Tessa wasn't the same Tessa he knew back on Earth"
The way he looked at her, and the way he was suspicious of her. He knew HIS Tessa would never treat a drone like this. Cyn has been known to have relatively shitty recreations of people at times (like Thad in episode two) But even so there was no way he could believe it was someone else (like. who would it be? he saw her blood he heard her voice like...) which is why he was so stressed after killing her (when he leaned on his sword and was breathing heavy, yk?)
he loved her and she loved him and now shes dead. just like everyone else he loved.
this isnt about n but like. idk if tessa could see him now i think shed cry. she loved him and all of them
#tzu rambles#i just. she was a kid dude#she was a stupid hurting abused kid#she was treated like shit by her mother and probably her father too#and all she had were those drones#the ones that killed her and her family#the ones that ruined her life and destroyed earth#the ones that MIMICKED HER TO THE PEOPLE SHE LOVED MOST#THE “N!!!” SQUEAL. THE PETTING HIS HAIR. THE DISMISSAL OF J#FUCKING SICK AND TWISTED#Bc i genuinely believe that if Tessa HAD come to copper 9 alive she wouldve been like that#maybe a little more sympathetic to uzi. like if she knew abt the patch she wouldve used it. i know that#but otherwise i think shed be like that. silly. silly like that.#(esp kicking that computer monitor. we all saw her chuck a glass at the floor for no reason)#child abuse#abuse tw#tessa james elliot#murder drones#tessa elliot#tessa md#md tessa#tessa murder drones#murder drones tessa
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BREAKING NEWS!!! Local idiot ghost absolutely blown away when boyfriend gives him a nickname for the first time, more info after this broadcast.
Bonus pet-name edition:
(Yeah I know it's ooc for grovyle to EVER use the term "babe" but lets go ahead and assume he's done it accidentally a few times rather than intentionally. He's deeply in love with the dumb ghostman, ok. Sometimes it just slips out.)
Dusknoir is still recovering from hearing it. And when he finally calls grovyle "love" himself on accident a few days later, he falls deathly ill for two weeks cause his body couldn't handle the aftermath and started rapidly shutting down on a molecular level.
#dusknoir he is dying pls for the love of god just give him the heal seed already#i headcanon that grovyle starts to call dusknoir just “noir” simply because it's less effort but dusknoir is legitimately touched by it#he's never had a nickname before so he cried happy tears for only 2 hours after this interaction#celebi thinks noir's drama over the entire thing is very funny so she starts calling him “beloved” even more and he has a meltdown#and dusknoir being a literal functional storage unit is my favorite thing he is so good at HOLDING stuff for his BF and GF#he carries water bottles and snacks for them like a total mom when they go exploring#(he got the habit after hanging out w/ echo and sora. those are his kids so of course he's gonna have treats!!!)#what's in the void you ask??? who knows probably a pocket universe or the elusive pmd2 remake#i had way too much fun drawing this is it obvious?#and i really like the new brush i've been using lately so i'm happy#also first comic i put decent effort into!!!! yay#actaeonshipping#future trio#dusknoir#grovyle#celebi#pmd#pmd2#pmd eos#explorers of sky#my art#tw blood
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thinking abt maya seeing through trucy's facade because she's ALSO been a young traumatised child who grew up wanting to please the adults around her and having to be grateful to be taken in. about her accepting that this is something trucy will continue to do because as a child with no real agency it is the one thing she has to protect herself. and she doesnt try to fix it but instead reassures her as often as she can that love can be unconditional
#thinking about Them hours....#phoenix realises it sooner i think i mean hes her DAD. i think thats why they become so close bc he also Gets it that#shes young and traumatized and he can't expect her to be like others her age after all she's been through and so he can't treat her liketha#and also realizes that he can only do his best to be a good parent without ever expecting her to reciprocate his love#(i think she does reciprocate it but itll take a longg while)#thinking abt both maya and trucy thinking they're only good for their powers but while they had both thought it was unavoidable to be used#they have such different outlooks on it. anyway i want to squish both of them and go 'YOU ARE LOVED!!!!!!! DO YOU SEE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'#ace attorney#maya fey#trucy wright
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A Batfam AU where instead of going to get Dick to be Robin again Tim uses necromancy to bring Jason back from the dead. He just leaves Jason on the Wayne doorstep with a 'do better this time' sticky note. Batman can't find out who did it and Tim stays his little latchkey self with semi ok but distant parents (cus canonical they weren't really abusive just not there which isn't good but they could be worse). His parents bring him along on trips but again they love him but they just leave him to do as he pleases. so in Paris he ends up still getting trained by Lady Shiva. This keeps going and Tim just keeps reviving batfam members, if they fake their deaths and Tim tracks them down to check on them. They still have no idea who their shadow is, they can't find him, Tim likes it this way. Bruce goes MIA and Red Robin happens just minus Tim actually being Red Robin. The JLA doorstep gets a passed-out Batman with a 'I can't believe I have to keep doing this shit' sticky note on his head.
#now you're probably going Batcaves i see those fics all the time? and my retort is those are babyified Tim Drake fics. he then gets adoped#the batfam and has a coffee addiction. i want a Tim Drake that treats the batfam like how wildlife rehab centers treat animals. they make#themselves knowable of the subject. they're striving to improve their quality of care. establish safe working habits. share skills. put car#of the subject over personal gain. be professional and humane. protect welfare of the subject. release the subject as soon as appropriate.#it's just his subject is batvigilantes not a racoon that was on the side of the road.#tim drake#batman#robin#dc comics#dc universe#detective comics#batman comics#batman and robin#batman au#and i think Jack and Janet being abusive is getting boring. have them be ok parents. they give tim a long leash but fail to see hes using i#for his own fun. they never told him he CANT learn necromancy and revive bat vigilantes how was HE supposed to know it's a bad thing??#maybe they should have looked at what he was doing while they were off. (like Phineus and Ferb. He asked if he could learn self-defense.#he learned from Lady Shiva not at the YMCA. He asked if he could read a book on necromancy! you didn't tell him he's not aloud to use what#he learned! he asked if he could go to the cemetery to see Jason! you didn't say he couldn't revive him! and so on)#Tim: mom can I learn self-defense while in Paris?#Janet: that's a good idea there are so many pickpockets here a little training would be nice for you. do you know a place?#Tim: Yes! her name is Sandra#Janet: cool. if you think she's the best choice. here some money.#Tim: Thanks Mom!#janet drake#jack drake#fanfic idea#fic idea#fanfic ideas#batfam
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doodles for the thoughts i get at the morning when unable to sleep
#library of ruina#lobotomy corporation#a little. as a small treat. for me. i leave the torture basement but it doesnt leave me#yesod lor#chesed lor#HI CHESED!!! i got to his floor w gebs. one more fight in urban nighrmare and did one realization already. dude. dude. DUDE DUDE!!!!!!!!#the fights are so fun. got mt qss beat by king of greed twice until i figured it out. she is DEAD!!!!! get booked bozo#little red pain in my ass too... aughhg.... second attempt but damn be so fr w me girl#the fight is warp train btw. i thought i qas doing somwthing wrong during rhe bossfighr. no its just long#back to the doodles. theyre all yesod because i was using his floor and screwing around w it last before i got off
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I am once again thinking about how odysseus who witnessed the horrors that the captured women went through (one of his main duties in the iliad was taking the women back home and making sure they were as comfortable as possible and safe because he was the only one trusted not to violate them further due to his devotion to penelope. And in the odyssey part of the reason circe sent him to the underworld was so that he'd have to listen to all these women's stories (before he could talk to the prophet) ). Who was one of the few that saw women as people and respected their space and opinions. And was then put in those exact same situations. I don't have the motivation right now to do a full literary analysis of this (I'll site the sources too) but oh man one day I'm going to write a full essay on this.
#The odyssey#iliad#Odysseus#Tw: rape#Tw: sex slaves#Tw: camp slaves#Tw: That one time Calypso kept odysseus as a sex slave for 7 years#circe#Something about the inherent trauma of witnessing how your friends treat women#Watching them keep sex slaves#Then having to bring these girls home hearing about their stories seeing the aftermath#Then living in a situation where you have to let a powerful witch use you as she pleases half in payment for lives/food/medicine#Half because she has the equivalent of a gun to your best friends head and if you don't keep her happy then youre all dead#And then that witch sends you on a quest to the underworld where granted you'll benefit too but first#You have to listen to every single captured women from the Trojan war that you didn't Shepard home tell you their stories#Tell you that you're a horrible person while you are living in a disturbingly similar situation#And then later finding yourself trapped as a sex slave for seven years to an immortal nymph#And then being labeled as a horrible cheater for the rest of history#And none of this well historically everybody cheated or it's up to interpretation bullshit#Because it fucking isn't and granted a lot of abridged versions skip this shit#But if you read the full original stories and still think odysseus cheated then you just have an issue with men being victims#Or weren't paying attention i guess#Where's that meme where's it like the text was up to interpretation cut to the text where it very bluntly states what's happening#And I'm not saying odysseus was a good person or that he didn't have slaves because he did. And he wasnt#But first off nobody deserves to suffer that violation#Second they weren't sex slaves they were all nurses/maids/spys and I'm not getting into the ancient culture slavery issues rn#Third there's a lot you can pick to hate odysseus for but cheating/disrespecting women wasn't one of them#They literally invented a new word to describe his and penelopes love and it means to be so in love that you think the exact same way#Also forcing this narrative of odysseus cheating and penelope leaving to be a single girl boss is#Just the fake feminist mindset that stay at home moms are weak and wrong and live awful lives
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whoever this beloved anon was I am so touched by your kindness! You definitely didn’t have to do this but I am so happy you enjoy this idea and I will happily expand upon it for you!
this is just a collection of word vomit bullet points for the time being but I will happily answer any and all questions about this pair!!
warnings: violence, angst, child death (Sarah Miller), foul language, the same warnings that apply to tlou, reader is Sarah's mom and described as having similar features to her.
So the general Idea is that you and Joel are happily married before the outbreak.
You had been Sarah's mother, his high school sweetheart he got pregnant when neither of you were old enough to have any reaction to the pregnancy test other than a fucking panic attack in one another’s arms. but you made it work
you both worked but made time for one another and your sweet girl, going to museums every other weekend and joel insisting on swooping you off for a date every now and then
nothing special. He knows you’re more of a diner gal than anything too fancy that makes you both feel out of place.
On his birthday in 2003, you had planned to tell him that you were pregnant again. But the memories of your own fears of motherhood from all those years ago begin to swirl through your head again and you get cold feel. deciding to tell him the morning after
it is his birthday afterall, you want to focus on him.
but when you’re woken up in the middle of the night because tommy needs to get bailed out, Joel kisses you sweetly one last time before promising he’ll be back and you can’t shake the feeling that something bad is happening.
its you that shakes sarah awake that night. shouting at her to put on her shoes when she’s still rubbing the sleep from her eyes because you’ve been listening to the radio for the past two hours, calling joel again and again and again praying for him to fucking pick up but to no avail.
Sarah, bless your little girl’s bleeding heart is the one who insists you check on the adler’s against your better suspicions and when you find the eldest looming over her daughter, blood and sinew dripping from her mouth, you grab your daughter hand and burst into a full sprint until something slams into your back and sends you tumbling onto their front lawn
its how joel finds you, struggling to keep the once sweet old woman, whose now nothing more than dead eyes and gnashing teeth straining to snap at your pulse point as you push against her while sarah shrieks before your husband runs forward and cracks her skull with a wrench.
there’s hardly a moment of pause, just enough for him to pull you up and into his arms before he’s ushering you both into the car with an urgency.
when the truck crashes, you get separated from them. Perhaps at Tommy’s side when the flames rise and create a wall, separating you from your husband, or maybe pulled into the mob of chaos when trying to escape from those already infected-
all joel knows is that you promise you’ll find him: just get sarah to safety and you’ll meet him at the river
Poor thing is already so frightened, held in her father’s arms with tears streaming down her face insisting they can’t leave you they just can’t but her father kisses her forehead and reassures her its going to be okay
“we just need to be brave, okay babygirl? Your mama’s real tough, she’s gonna be alright.”
he isn’t sure if he’s saying it to his daughter or himself.
but when he comes to the river you aren’t there. Only a soldier who points a gun at the scared little girl in his arms and then he loses everything
its when the light is gone from his daughter’s eyes that he realizes. His voice cracked and raw from sobbing that he looks around to see his brother with drawn in shoulders and tears in his eyes but his wife is nowhere to be found.
Tommy says you got lost in the chaos. Everything was so loud, so sudden that he turned around and suddenly you weren’t there.
Joel wants to go back but its Tommy that stops him, that dulls the red in his vision to a sad faded pink because his brother points at the orange horizon not too far from them, so much of the city is already in flames.
“We’re gonna find her, but not there.”
So Joel searches. for the first year spent in the world post-outbreak its all he did.
He became a smuggler because of it.
Information came at a price and he needed to be able to fucking pay it, whether it be in blood or ration cards. He was willing to do anything to find you or any thin thread that lead your way.
But it’s Tommy that asks him to give up. Not in those words of course.
The youngest Miller knows better than to say something so cruel that would make his brother, the only person he has in this world turn on him.
But his voice is worried when he asks him one night in Boston when he hasn’t even had the chance to wash the blood from his knuckles
“You think she would have wanted this for you?”
the fight that followed his words was brutal. Vicious insults and scarred fists slamming against each brother until they're both too tired and bloody to continue. Each leaning against a wall for support and Tommy’s wavering voice breaking the silence.
“I don’t know where she is, Joel. But I do know you're gonna get yourself killed if you keep lookin’ for her.”
All he can do is nod.
It’s a few days later when he meets Tess. Who has heard plenty of stories about the elder miller’s brutality and wants him to put that muscle to good use for some extra profit.
It begins his new life. One that empty and cold but one he can live.
Until of course, Ellie comes along. The sweet and incredibly opinionated girl that makes him become something akin to the man he thought died twenty years ago.
its when he’s traveling with Ellie, that it happens. When a warm familiarity has settled between the two because so much blood and pain has been shared he can’t help but see her as something close, something bright even though all he can force himself to utter in her reference is “cargo”
when theyre traveling through the woods as Ellie chatters away, probing his memory about a movie that may or may not have existed thirty years ago because her descriptions of the plot are incredibly odd he hears a voice shout for them to stop and finds himself staring at a man- no, a boy- pointing a gun at them.
Ellie stills, but Joel can see enough to know that from the lanky figure and dimpled face that he’s young. Maybe twenty, twenty-two at the oldest, but his eyes dart from Joel to Ellie with a pinprick of fear that allows Joel the time to charge forward and slam him to the ground before wrestling the gun from his hands.
He has enough to time to tuck it under the stranger’s chin before he hears the sound of the safety being turned off and finds himself looking up and seeing a gun just inches from his face.
Joel’s head whips around when Ellie’s voice calls out his name in fear, he turns to see another stranger holding her a gun point, shoulders drawn back and a shadow cast over their face by the had obstructing their identity.
“You hurt one of mine, I hurt one of yours. That a fair deal?”
Its takes him a moment to recognize you. It’s been so long since he’s heard your voice, the sweet tease when you would poke at him each time he woke up late despite the fact that you reminded him to set his alarm the night before, the times you’d chide him with a harsh “Joel Miller!” whispered in public anytime he was able to grab you a bit too passionately to be appropriate in public but the laughter in your voice let him know you were never truly mad at him. You didn’t know how to be.
But that sweetness is buried under a cold rasp that cuts through the air as you point a rifle at the scared little girl in front of you.
“You think I won’t?” You’re older now, skin covered in scars from a life he didn’t know you got the chance to live and your eyes are cold as they regard your husband. “Put the gun down and get the fuck off of him, I won’t repeat myself.”
Joel mumbles your name in awe. The woman he loved, the woman he mourned the one he fought so hard to find stands before him like some sort of hallucination and suddenly the world feels like its spinning until you bark orders at him again.
“You’ve got five seconds Joel, make a fucking choice before I make it for you.”
He looks down and realizes the boy under him, the one with the bleeding nose and snarling face has your eyes and his dimples.
“One.”
The one above him has Sarah’s hair. Soft brown curls that shine under the sun.
“Two”
Wait. No, they both do.
“Three.”
Twins. Jesus fucking Christ you had twins.
“Four.”
Joel holds the rifle up above his head and the one boy standing snatches it from his grasp, tossing it to the ground and kicking it far from his reach. He slowly stands, allowing your son- dear god your son- to scramble to his feet.
Your voice softens just for a moment. “You okay, Duke?”
Blood stains the bottom half of his face from where Joel slammed his fist into the boy’s nose just moments before, but he nods nonetheless.
Now, they both stand on one side of you and he can see the resemblance clear as day the same way he would whenever Sarah was by your side.
When you order him to hand over his bag, he does so without question before telling Ellie to do the same.
She watches him with wide eyes, her hands still up in the air but gaping at her companion as if he had grown a second head.
“Joel!” “Just do it, alright?”
He doesn’t miss the way you watch their interaction with narrowed eyes until she tosses her bag to you and you slowly lower your gun.
“Now, you want to tell me what the fuck you think you’re doin’ at my home?”
#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#i had an idea of something similar for tommy but on outbreak night he uh. abandons you instead of getting separated from you#because. angst :D#people say nice things#this was incredibly generous of you anon thank you so so much!#i may get myself a little starbucks drink this week now because I havent had starbucks since like january 1st lol#joel reeling from taking in all this information and also realizing he suckerpunched HIS OWN KID#id like to apologize for all the grammatical issues with this. this is just a bulletpoint word vomit to get my thoughts on the page before-#-beginning the actual fic. also I have to do a midterm tonight and this is my treat to myself hehe#but yes. joel getting separated from his wife on outbreak night and having to accept that shes probably dead#meanwhile youve lived this entire life without him because you think HES dead ad raising your boys all on your own#which just- further digs into his insecurities about failing in his role as a protector#he couldn't save sarah. he can't save ellie and he couldn't even save you#he thinks about you pregnant and alone. fending for yourself in a world full of infected and raiders and his chest grows tight again#this is all followed by Ellie going >:O 'you KNOW THIS PSYCHO?'and then joel immediately snapping at her to WATCH HER MOUTH#because that kid has no filter and he has to explain that youre his wife#anyways joels wife is a badass mfer who also maybe has a little garden and some chickens that you and your boys take care of <3 yeah .#reunion tag#ill be using that for this specific couple because I dont have a fic title yet but if anybody has suggestions!
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