#Running Jokes | German Politics

[xtruss]

Political Party In Germany 'Calls For Kebabs To Be Subsidised'

The cost of kebabs has become something of a running joke in German politics, with Chancellor Olaf Scholz remarking that everywhere he goes he is asked about it.

— Tuesday 7 May 2024 | NewsSky.Com

The kebab is one of Germany's de facto national dishes. Photograph iStock

Should The Government Subsidise Kebabs?

That's the question in Germany at the moment amid fears the price of the dish could surpass €10 (£8.60).

The German Left Party has reportedly proposed using state funds to cap the price of kebabs at €4.90 (£4.20) - and €2.50 (£2.10) for young people.

The meaty flatbread meal - one of Germany's de facto national dishes - currently averages around €7.9 (£6.80), a number that the Left Party says is going up with inflation.

The cost of kebabs has become something of a running joke in German politics, with Chancellor Olaf Scholz remarking that everywhere he goes he is asked about it.

Kathi Gebel, a member of the Left Party's executive committee, told BILD: "When young people demand: Olaf, make the kebab cheaper, then it's not an internet joke, but a serious cry for help!

"The state must intervene so that food does not become a luxury item."

Photograph iStock

The newspaper cited a report from Ms Gebel's party, which says that 1.3 billion kebabs are eaten in Germany every year and the proposed subsidies could potentially cost "almost four billion".

Rents and electricity costs for kebab shops are rising, pushing up prices for consumers, the party says.

In the UK, people buying takeaways have faced soaring prices, with the boss of Deliveroo saying in March that food inflation was outpacing wage inflation by about two to one.

The UK government has not made any commitment to a kebab price cap.

[waytootiredstudent]

Okay alright sorry for all the sudden German politics influx but lemme explain what happened so far and why Germans are losing it a bit:

The tldr? Our government is getting a divorce and it's turning messy with elections being called early and now being called even earlier.

The longer version?

Okay so, groundwork first:

in Germany there is a coalition currently in power called the Ampel(traffic lights) bc the colours of the party are red, yellow and green (or not anymore or for much longer??). They're centrist slightly more left leaning than right leaning. (You could argue about that I am aware). There has been infighting for as long as this coalition has been going on. It is also the first three party coalition since y know, the Last Time.

So. Enough groundwork. The yellow party (FDP) has a finance minister (Christiane Lindner) it's this guy

You will see him in memes I am sure. We don't like him. He's an asshole and has blocked every meaningful change that the coalition had been trying to accomplish. He also got his finance plan blocked by our highest court because parts were against our Constitution.

(.... I am oversimplifying hard here it's actually more complicated than that and not fully his fault, but it's also not the focus)

What WAS the fault though of him and the FDP was that they had a strong position of "saving money at all costs" which made bigger and bigger rifts with the two other coalition partners who were more leaftleaning. The war in Ukraine, Infrastructure, climate change - there were many places that needed more money and Lidner was like naaahhhhh for no fucking reason other than "oh we need to save money!!"

Long story short there have been arguing all the fucking time and therefore have started to lose approval. Drastically lose approval. As on for the first time since the Last Time there is a far right party in charge for part of the country that is also being investigated for being Nazis. (Oversimplifying again).

Which is. Worrying. You know. Especially with Trump now being elected. It has us all a little skittish.

The finance minister has also now been fired.

You see. We were all still trying to stomach Trump winning the US election, when Scholz, in the same fucking evening, fired Lindner.

And not in a polite way. Nah. Olaf fucking Scholz our Chancellor, notorious for saying literally nothing, and with a running joke that he regularly stops existing bc that man Does Not Take Stances, a spine of wet cardboard, delivered this yesterday evening:

(English subtitles by me you already got this far watch it I spent too much time on this lol)

And it is insane alright. For his standards and German politic standards thats the equivalent of calling Lindner a egomaniacal bitch that has only his self interest at heart and can not be trusted.

Lindner and his party have been pulverised in all recent elections. Which means that after he was fired, the FDP completely withdrew from the coalition and all minister from the FDP resigned.

....well all but one who apparently stayed in his positions because he's leaving the FDP over this. What sort of shitty backstabbing kindergarten fight is this. (Jokes aside hes the minister of transportation and says he needs to stay in office in important projects. Which. True. Having minister resigning en mass is not good)

Alright cool cool cool cool. Current situation yesterday is the following:

So. Trump is president. Fuck.

Lindner got fired! Yaaay!

Wait my goverment is now also falling apart! Fuck.

Which all lead to new elections being called in Germany.

Mind you, that's not usual ok. I know other countries have systems where they can call an election whenever but that is not a thing that normally happens here. We have a schedule alright. (Insert obligatory "Germans and their plans and structure" joke)

So new elections are called for spring, nearly a year early. Cool cool cool. With a right wing rising in Germany and deeply unpopular current leadership. On the eve of motherfucking trump getting elected.

Habeck, leader of the green party and one of the few policians in germany I think is vaguely liked by ppl (the general attitude in German politics is less "I like this guy" and more "you are the least shitty choice I guess") has appearently also nearly started crying after the news broke. So. Yeah.

Now. Let's make this shitshow complete,alright?

There is this party. CDU. They had been in charge for a very long time in Germany. Centrist, right leaning, with the afd on the rising even more right leaning than before. Their current leader is Friedrich Merz, as unpleasant as human beings can go.

He has now called for the new election to be not in a few months but like. To be called next week.

In the current climate.

So yeah. if you're German mutuals and friends are currently going through their own stages of grief - this is why.

[hedgehog-moss]

I randomly found a 500 page French book on OpenLibrary about the etymology of animal names so here are 10 (ish) fun facts:

the French word for poodle, “caniche” looks like it definitely comes from Latin “canis” (dog) but no! It comes from cane / canard (duck) because it was a waterfowl-hunting dog—and its name in English, Swedish, German, Dutch (poodle, pudel, puedel) also reflects this dog’s affinity with water (from pudeln = to splash about). It’s like otters, whose name come from the same root as water...

the canary on the other hand is named after canis / dog, since it comes from the Canary Islands which, according to Pliny the Elder, were named after the huge dogs that lived there at some point. Some historians think these mysterious big dogs were actually seals or big lizards. Then a bird ended up with the name ‘from the dog place’ though it’s unclear if dogs were ever truly involved. (Meanwhile Spain / Hispania comes from the Phoenician i-shepan-im, the place with rabbits.) I like the idea of ancient humans seeing seals or lizards and going “weird dogs”. Like how ancient Greeks saw hyenas and named them “pigs, I guess?”

the fox has a great diversity of names in Europe: fox / Fuchs, zorro, räv, volpe, raposa, lisu, róka, renard... In French it used to be called ‘goupil’, from the same Latin root as the Italian ‘volpe’, but then the mediaeval cycle of poems known as Le Roman de Renart, about an unprincipled fox named Renart, became so popular that renard became the word for fox and goupil disappeared. It’s like if 500 years from now bears in English were called baloos. (The English and German words for fox come from the indo-european root puk- which means tail, like Hungarian ‘farkas’ (wolf) which means tail-having, or squirrel, from the Greek words for shade + tail, there are actually lots of animals that are just “that one with a tail”...)

French has a word for baby rabbit (lapereau) derived from Latin leporellus (little hare) and we used to have a word for adult rabbit (conin) from Latin cuniculus (rabbit)—related to the German Kaninchen, Italian coniglio, Spanish conejo, etc. But ‘conin’ in Old French also meant pussy (there were mediaeval puns about this in the Roman de Renart) and at some point I guess people were like okay, it was funny at first but we’ve run this joke into the ground, and a new and politically correct word appeared for adult rabbit (lapin) based on the pre-existing word for baby rabbit (lapereau).

The english bear is thought to come from the proto-IE root bher-, for brown—I love how Finnish has so many nicknames and euphemisms for “bear” ranging from “honey palm” to “apple of the forest” and English is like... dude’s brown. Same amount of effort with the Swedish and Danish words for fox, räv / ræv, from a root that means reddish-brown. (And the Hungarian word for lion, oroszlán, along with the Turkish ‘aslan’, comes from proto-Turkic arislan / arsilan which comes from arsil which means brown...) And since brown was already taken, ‘beaver’ (+ German, Dutch, Swedish...: Biber, bever, bäver) has been speculated to come from bhe-bhrus-, a doubling of the original root so... brownbrown.

English foal / German Fohlen / French poulain / Italian puledro all come from the proto-IE root pu- which means small (e.g. Latin puer and Greek pais = child)—then the French ‘poulain’ became ‘poulenet’ with the diminutive -et (so, a smallsmall animal) and poulenet became powny in Scots then pony in English, which was then re-imported by French as ‘poney’. Also the Spanish word for donkey, burro, comes from Latin burricus = small horse, and in French Eeyore is named Bourriquet with the -et diminutive ending, so we just keep taking small horses and turning them into smallsmall horses...

The boa (bo(v)a) shares the same etymology as bovine / bœuf / beef, due to a widespread belief that some snakes suckled milk from cows. Pliny the Elder stated this as fact and (not to bully him but) modern research tells us “there is no empirical basis for saying snakes like mammal milk; experiments, indeed, have shown that captive snakes systematically refuse to drink milk”

I was disappointed to learn that antelope comes from Greek anthólops which referred to a mythical creature, because I grew up convinced the origin of the word (antilope in French) was anti-lupus, as in, the gazelle is the generic prey so as a concept it’s the opposite of the wolf, the generic predator. Wolf and anti-wolf. Though it raised the question of why we don’t have antilions (zebra), anticats (mice) and antibears (salmons)

Many European languages have named kites after some sort of flying animal: in English it comes from the word for owl, in Portuguese from the word for parrot, in Italian from eagle, and in French it’s cerf-volant aka flying-deer. There’s an interesting hypothesis for this! Kites came to Europe from China, where they were often shaped like dragons or snakes, and snake is serpent in French and serpe in Old French, so it’s possible that kites were serpe-volants aka flying-snakes. But the ‘p’ and ‘v’ next to one another were a hassle to pronounce so the p got dropped and it became ser-volant, then ‘ser’ which isn’t a word started being mistaken for ‘cerf’ which is pronounced ‘ser’ but means deer... (We did it again with chauve-souris (bald-mouse = bat), which comes from the Gaulish cawa-sorix aka owl-mouse—which makes more sense as a name for bats! similar to the German Fledermaus, flying-mouse, and Spanish murciélago, blind-mouse. But Gaulish ‘cawa’ was mixed up with Latin ‘calva’ = chauve = bald, so now a French bat is a bald-mouse)

I love etymology, it’s all flying deer and dogs named splash and snakes named cow and ponies named smallsmall and five animals named brown and three named tail—words acquire a veneer of linguistic respectability over the centuries and we forget that fundamentally everyone just says whatever

[mastermark1960]

I am once again so disappointed with the leftist demonazis constantly spewing nonsensical drivel every time they don't like someone elses opinion. Demonazis are so far to the left that they agree with and use the propaganda tools of the two worst extreme right ass holes that ever walked the earth. Hitler and Stalin both treated their own people with such disrespect and callousness that they created concentration camps and gulags to silence any opposition to their rule.

The following information comes from the holocaust encyclopedia. I wrote comments that are not after bullet points.

• The Nazis were skilled propagandists who used sophisticated advertising techniques and the most current technology of the time to spread their messages.

Think of CNN, MSNBC, NPR, ABC, CBS, NBC, all other "news outlets" for example the New York times, Boston globe, and Washington post are but a few. They don't report the news but continuously give us their opinions on everything. The 5ws are desperately needed to stop their propaganda. We can include the woke organizations like Disney and Hollywood movie makers for spreading propaganda for the demonazis.

• Once in power, Adolf Hitler created a Ministry of Public Enlightenment and Propaganda to shape German public opinion behavior.

▪︎Nazi propaganda played an integral role in advancing the persecution and ultimately the destruction of Europe’s Jews and all political Dissidents. It incited hatred and fostered a climate of indifference to their fate.

Think of how the demonazis allowed the likes of BLM and ANTIFA to destroy many cities. No action was taken by those in power to stop the destruction or prosecute the perpetrators. Then remember the hissy fit they had when they allowed, yes demonazis allowed, Republican protester into the capital. The demonazis prosecuted 100s of peaceful republican protesters. If the republican protesters were acting like BLM and ANTIFA the Capitol would be a smoking ruin.

• The Nazis wanted Germans to support the Nazi dictatorship and believe in Nazi ideas. To accomplish this goal, they tried to control forms of communication through censorship and propaganda. This included control of newspapers, magazines, books, art, theater, music, movies, and radio.

• When the Nazis came to power in 1933, the German constitution guaranteed freedom of speech and freedom of the press. Through decrees and laws, the Nazis abolished these civil rights and destroyed German democracy. Starting in 1934, it was illegal to criticize the Nazi government. Even telling a joke about Hitler was considered treachery. People in Nazi Germany could not say or write whatever they wanted. 

Examples of censorship under the Nazis included:

• Closing down or taking over anti-Nazi newspapers; 

• Controlling what news appeared in newspapers, on the radio, and in newsreels;

• Banning and burning books that the Nazis categorized as un-German.

• Textbooks are a good example of how propaganda and censorship worked together in the Nazi regime. The Nazis used both propaganda and censorship to control what students read in school. Nazi censors removed some textbooks from classrooms. New textbooks taught students to obey the Nazi Party, love Hitler, and hate Jews.

The demonazis took over education with the creation of the Department of education in 1979.

The Higher Education Act of 1965 introduced federal student aid and loan programs. These give away programs allowed higher education to run amuk with ever increasing cost of degrees. This needs to stop now.

Demonazis try to stop the political middle and right from voicing their opinions by controlling who can and can't post on many social media sight. Censorship at it worst. Thank God Elon Musk bought out Twitter and turned it into X. No more censorship there. Of course the demonazis scream foul.

We The People who love the United States of America must stand by her in her hour of desperate need. If we don't our great country is doomed. I know this is a long winded post but I felt it was necessary to explain how dangerous the deep state and New World Order are. This is why I call the democrats demonazis as the word fits perfectly.

Thank you for reading this post. If you like my post please repost it and start calling the democrats exactly what they are, demonazis.

[hanna-lulu]

i’ve been comparing the usa now to germany circa the late 1930s and it is not a favorable comparison.

let’s see what we’ve got:

increasing antisemitism

increasing transphobia

increasing ableism

continued oppression of indigenous peoples

laws being introduced to ban gender-affirming care and remove children from their homes if they are allowed to live as they wish

books being banned for having honest and age-appropriate portrayals of race/racism and queerness/homophobia

pushing maid (medical assistance in dying) on people with disabilities and even people who are just poor (this is more in canada but i’m including it here anyway)

a right wing that is seen as ridiculous and absurd, yet is somehow still managing to hold onto power while liberals/leftists laugh it off as if they’ll run out of steam

it’s important to note that in the 1930s, when hitler came to power, the international community thought he was a joke. his overblown rhetoric was silly, his history was laughable, and nobody took him seriously. they thought it would all blow over. also, he wasn’t saying anything that a lot of people didn’t secretly agree with. antisemitism, homophobia, transphobia, ableism, and racism were widespread throughout europe and the usa, and a lot of people had less of a problem with what he was saying and more with how he was saying it. (think kanye west’s antisemitic comments, which joe rogan did attempt to stop him from making so blatantly, but didn’t actually disagree with.)

the first medical and educational facility for gender affirming care was in berlin. did you know that? the institut für sexualwissenschaft (known variably in english as institute of sex research, institute of/for sexology, or institute for the science of sexuality) was founded in 1919 and headed by magnus hirschfeld, who was both gay and jewish. he helped build a library in the institute that was dedicated to the topics of gender, eroticism, and same-sex love. the research undertaken there regarded sexual health of all people, gay, transgender, and intersex, as well as counseling and treatment for alcoholism, gynecological issues, venereal diseases, contraceptives, and more. sexual reassignment surgeries were performed successfully there. the goal was to help those who were suffering because they could not live as who they truly were and to educate the common people, because people fear what they see as different, what they cannot understand.

you won’t find the books in that library today. they were burned as part of the nazis’ campaign of terror and censorship. in 1933, 6 years before world war 2 officially broke out, the institut was broken into and looted by the deutsche studentenschaft (aka the german student union). young adults who had spent their formative years surrounded by hateful rhetoric were accompanied by a brass band as they destroyed this oasis of understanding and knowledge. hirschfeld himself had fled germany years before, as he had been targeted numerous times by nationalists/far right “activists”.

berlin once had a thriving queer community. germany was a home to many jews, my own great-grandparents included. my great-grandmother’s younger brother had a learning disability. their home turned on them out of fear and ignorance, the people told by their leaders that other human beings were not really human, but degenerate filth. my great-grandparents escaped with their lives. many– my great-grandma’s brother included– did not.

the concentration camps that imprisoned and killed so many jewish, queer, and/or disabled people (as well as romani and political prisoners, and japanese-americans IN THE USA) are not consigned to the past. our prison system disenfranchises those who are placed in it and uses them for unpaid labor. refugees are caged for daring to hope that our country– the so-called “land of the free”– would take them in when their homes turned on them. indigenous people are ridiculed and attacked for wanting to help our planet heal and for asking to conserve the land that was stolen from their ancestors. almost a hundred years since the holocaust, and we still haven’t learned.

don’t look away from this. it’s not going to blow over. those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it, and we are already experiencing a resurgence of fascist beliefs and rhetoric.

write to your representatives. VOTE. protest if and when you can. show them that we are HERE and we refuse to be written out of the history books, banned or burned away. we are human beings. we live and love and deserve to do so with dignity.

and if appealing to your humanity isn’t enough, remember this poetic version of a quote by german lutheran pastor martin niemöller, an early nazi collaborator and antisemite who later changed his views and opposed hitler’s oppressive regime:

“first they came for the socialists, and i did not speak out–

because i was not a socialist.

then they came for the trade unionists, and i did not speak out–

because i was not a trade unionist.

then they came for the jews, and i did not speak out–

because i was not a jew.

then they came for me– and there was no one left to speak for me.”

there is always another enemy in fascism. anyone who is different will eventually be a target. white supremacy is poison, and fitting the mold of a “perfect citizen” cannot keep you safe. queer infighting and pushing down people who you find “too weird” will not stop the people who hate all of us. to the far right, we are all wrong to our very cores. solidarity in the face of oppression is the only way to survive, live, and thrive.

[seraphcelene]

IWTV S2E4 - I Want You More Than Anything in the World

There are games being played.

Let's talk about Louis -- how he's been transformed from the melancholy, self-flagellating moral mess to almost equal parts temper and angst, ever balanced between joy and hope and rage.

I can't compare this series to the books because it is a different beast altogether, and I LOVE the changes.

There is something sinister and beautiful in the way that IwtV has turned gender politics on its head. Queer love is centered and the vulnerability of emotion demanded of women in depictions of romantic relationships gets equal demand in the male leads. That is wildly true of the novels and makes for a welcome shift in the way that men are portrayed on screen. Armand's NEED oozes out of his eyes when he's with Louis. He is so in love. He also opens a vein describing his life before vampirism. It's a narrative that typically frames womanhood -- objectified, sexualized, enslaved and without agency. Then there's Louis grief, guilt, and unrequited love for Lestat, a force in every scene Jacob Anderson is in.

The commentary on how women fit and are objectified within society are there too. Madeline's shunning after her affair with a young German solider is explained in equally by "patriotism" and loose morals (she is slut shamed). Claudia's infantilization, at complete odds with how she sees herself and wants to be seen is horrifying. Her "maman" in the play makes a comment about Baby Lulu distracting her father so that he keeps his hands off her (the mother). It's coarse theater, of course, and it's meant to be a purple comment that suggests and titillates. It is also, to a modern audience, or at least this person as audience, horrifying. It reminded me immediately of how women are portrayed as objectified stand ins to attract the male gaze. Claudia's debasement, sexualized infant for the mortals and walking ridicule as blasphemy to the immortals, is a game, a show and a joke for everyone. That girl is going to break. Her developing relationship with Madeline is the closest depiction of normalcy and something she craves and has craved since she accidentally ate that boy back in Season 1.

It all makes an interesting comment on power structure. Who has it, who doesn't, who wants it, who doesn't. Season 1 sets Louis as the beta to Lestat's alpha. It makes sense. Lestat is a natural born alpha, but Louis as a beta is a little sleight of hand. Yes with Lestat, but as is increasingly more obvious absolutely not with Armand. Louis even reminds us that he is good at running things.

I'd argue that Armand was never really an alpha vampire. He holds the coven because his dark gifts are strong enough to allow him to, but not because anyone is particularly afraid or in awe of him. It makes Louis and Armand as a coven of two an interesting question. @lynnenne has posited that Louis is the one in control. I find that idea deliciously fascinating and more likely as we're watching the events of the past. But because this is still a story of unreliable narrator's, I have to question the truth. Is he? or isn't he?

Louis dresses his disdain and his resistance to emotional intimacy in Lestat's figure. He holds on to him as armor to hold off real emotional attachment even as he stares lovingly into Armand's face in the present and declares that he loved him even back them. I don't know that him letting go of Lestat in the rain (SO FUCKING SAD AND OH!) was about him deciding to be in love so much as it is about him deciding to let go of guilt and fear so that he can move forward. Lestat was his past. Running the theater could be his future and it would be to protect Claudia as much as it would be to protect Armand.

But again … what of this story is real? Daniel's migraines, the reemerging memories of San Francisco that are very much centered around what looks like Armand playing mind games.

Little things I loved about this episode:

Madeline and Claudia in the shop and the way that Claudia is lamenting that she is a vampire and Madeline is dinner

"Go sit in your choice, sister." - That fight was epic and hurtful and real. Both of them abandoned in different ways.

Claudia calling Armand on his shit. She is Lestat's daughter for sure. She doesn't give a fuck about the rituals and the rules. Claudia is looking for a space to belong in, but it has to be shaped for her and according to her rules. Anything else will chafe.

"The wilderness that is our daughter."

Louis letting Lestat go is one of the saddest thing ever. The music is a slightly discordant, manipulative goodbye in this very constructed story reflecting a very constructed end between Louis and Lestat. I love the way that Louis makes Lestat say apple and then apple in French as proof that he is just a figment of his imagination because Lestat is never that accommodating. "There isn't going to be a hunt, is there?" And then he is washed away by the rain.

[dynamoe]

Boy Genius wrapped up Feb 2023, but I got this nice review 10 days ago.

Maybe it was someone from Tumblr? If so and you're reading this, it has been the one light in a deeply hopeless two weeks— sincerely, thank you.

As I responded on AO3, I promise I will attempt to make all future backstory adventures more Eurocentric.

→ back to the Billy & White index

↓ more details ↓

Now, me, as a vulgar Ugly American— what do I know about European pop culture in the 1990s? What would have broken through to unambitious, uncultured suburban American teens?

Hmmmm... Barcelona '92 Olympics? The mascot was a scribbly dog thing. That's all I remember.

Ace of Base (Swedish) dominated 1994 with The Sign. They had another hit with All That She Wants (Is Another Baby) from the same year. Urban legends immediately started that they were Nazis and "the sign" was a swastika (an Ankh in the music video). Various levels of confirmation on that.

Do we count Björk as European?

I'm trying to think of European movies that broke through— the 1990s is the era of independent film but that was mostly focused on American auteurs. The big international hits were for an older audience— teens weren't into Lars von Trier or Three Colors Trilogy.

La Femme Nikita and Léon: The Professional (French-Italian) appealed big-time to the guys already into Tarantino and Hong Kong Action. At the end of the decade you get Run Lola Run (German), very big with teens and college students.

Billy and his date go see Jeunet-et-Caro's Delicatessen (French) in Tomorrow's Just Another Day. (Their City of Lost Children already referenced in VB for the design of Watch and Ward.)

Note, I'm excluding British pop culture, which I've already included a lot of in the fiction. The UK is still in the EU in the mid-90s, obvs, but American pop culture has a far different relationship with the British than with the rest of Europe. Even before the Beatles. "Cool Britannia" had a major hold in the US after 1997. A Ben & Jerry's ice cream. Tony Blair was on The Simpsons, before he became a war criminal. Trainspotting, Britpop and Elisabeth Hurley— God Save the Queen. As a British Comedy obsessive, I can write endlessly about the UK in the '90s—music, politics, TV, actors, comedians etc. Ask me anything about Spitting Image or all the stock jokes associated with Deputy PM John Prescott from Have I Got News for You. Except you shouldn't, it will be very boring for you.

Now the big European backstory story I have notes for would be a 1990-1991-set road trip through the Eastern Bloc and newly independent ex-Soviet Commonwealth of Independent States as Billy and White try to pick up abandoned super-science research from former state-sponsored labs for pennies on the dollar.

Starting in East Berlin, they stumble through Poland, Hungary, Yugoslavia into the Federation of Former Soviet States, heading east. White tries to trade Levis blue jeans for death ray plans. Billy mangles translating a dozen languages he barely understands (he's only 16).

They cause international incidents and nearly get killed over and over, running away to the next country. They are tailed by EuroPol, accidentally become oligarchs and have to be airlifted out of the US Embassy in Tashkent.

Tetris would be key. A Trojan Horse— it was actually a coded super-weapon meant to destabilize the west. Billy and White somehow figure it out and neuter its power while fucking everything else up.

I dunno. I might never write it but it's fun to think about.

→ back to the index

[sillingers]

nick blankenburg on ‘the inside edge’ radio show 2.15.23

i listened to this live and tried to take as many notes for characterization and blanks tidbits as possible so here we go:

didn’t start working out until freshmen year of college officially

likes lower body workouts best

is looking for a new gym this summer and might work with z

has yet to see z in the gym bc of his injury but says he’s a ‘beast’ in the room

jody shelley complimented his ‘big’ thighs. nick said they’ve ‘been bigger’ but he had less rigorous offseason training this summer bc of his knee surgery. jody then told nick ‘sorry i didnt mean to be looking at you’ because nick ‘looked like he was about to run out of the room’ in their opinion, and nick joked that he was wearing shorts so they’re out there. this whole ordeal was a lot to take in.

he said ‘oh yeah’ about ten times in two minutes with varying degrees of breathiness/elongation. i can let you interpret that as you will.

loves hitting people. says he always played physical because he grew up with an older brother and that’s just always been his game, so he doesn’t foresee it changing.

but he is working on being more intentional and careful with where he places his body on plays, as well as his off ice routines, to stay healthy and not be injured

adamantly refuses to dial down his physicality

thinks his compete and physicality is one of the reasons he’s here, he’s always played that way and it’s just who he is as a player

says being a right handed d on the left side is a challenge and it’s pushing him to be better

is a good lesson/challenge for him

good to have on his resume that he can play either side wherever he’s needed

stressed several times that he just wants to do what’s best for the team and do whatever it takes to play for them and just help the team anyway he can, whether that’s playing a different side or a special team or whatnot

just genuinely happy to be here and wants to do everything and anything he can

did not catch every detail but he talked specifically about the challenges of being a right shot on the left side like when peeker is feeding him passes on the point or when they’re going to break up ice and he’s catching pucks on his strong or weak side differently than he’s used to

when he was out for 9 weeks he spent a lot of time watching his game tape and trying to improve his play, he watches ‘probably all the game tape i have’ 

tries to stay positive and not be too hard on himself when injured and he doesn’t think any of the injuries he’s had even back at umich were a result of him playing too physical (read: yappy chihuahua wants to be an ankle biter and refuses to stop. denies that being an ankle biter has ever gotten him in any trouble)

says sometimes he thinks his family and friends know his game better than he does because they always tune in and text him after his games

loves the traveling that comes with being an nhl player, thinks he’s really lucky to have this job because it’s an easy and fun job that not many people get

“if you told me maybe 6 or 7 years ago that i’d be here i’d have never believed you”

really likes meeting all the fans and seeing them at warmups

definitely misses yost especially after getting to go back with kj

actually misses his classes. he studied international studies which dealt with political and economic development, he had lots of case studies of nations where a political/economic structure was either a great success or big failure

had to take 6 semesters of a language as required for his major. lasted 2 days in spanish, then tried german but it was too hard. he settled on swahili, which he took for 4 semesters, and then quechua (a latin american language he thinks is from peru but honestly couldn’t tell you where it’s from); said these were with 3 other unnamed teammates

wants to go on a mission trip in africa and hopes he can use his swahili notes there. is willing to teach jody but ‘it might cost you something’ because the class was expensive

loves cbus bc it feels like a college town just like ann arbor

didn’t think he’d ever actually say he loves columbus ohio but here he is

also loves how close it is (3 hours) to home

he’s really blessed to be here and couldn’t be happier with how it all worked out and the chance he has thanks to the jackets

the city and the fans have welcomed him so nicely

lives downtown in an apartment which is close by ‘the other young guys’ , they all live nearby 

says they do a lot of group dinners and will watch golf or football or some sport on tv together

loves that they have such a big group of young guys and they have that connection with each other and he has the ability to hang out with all them

primarily does hang out with the younger guys. likes having people around his age bc it reminds him of college. another thing he likes ab cbus is its a young city thanks to all the college kids/recent grads

also loves the restaurants cbus has (he didn’t name any in particular but said they’re all great)

is going to dinner with some of the umich guys before their games against osu, is hoping naur lets them out of team dinner to see him and kj

jody asked if nick would pay and he said he’d take his card out but that he hopes kj takes his card out too so they can split the bill

they brought up the osu-umich outdoor game, which nick said is an awesome opportunity to play in and looks super fun

played an outdoor game vs. notre dame, actually played against peeke who was at nd at the time. umich won 

very humble and appreciative of the opportunity he has to play in the nhl and live out his dream and do something he loves every night

the 82 game schedule is definitely hard mentally but that the challenges have made him a better person (yes, he specified person, not hockey player)

jody said that this and his positive mindset are a great attitude to have and will ‘help him stay here for a long time’ 

i just think jody loves nick as much as the rest of us

sometimes still pinches himself to see if it’s real 

jody shelley is obsessed with nick blankenburg just like me fr 

i think this is it he actually talked a lot so it was hard to keep track of everything but this is definitely all the main things

[planetofsnarfs]

Part of the deal with being CEO is that you get a big paycheck in exchange for being the public face of a company. For most people, at most companies, that means, at minimum, trying not to make an ass of yourself in public.

Tweeting a Holocaust joke, for example, might very well get you booted. Punching down at marginalized communities? Also a bad look.

But the same rules don't apply if you're the richest person on the planet, running companies stacked with cronies.

ICYMI: On Monday, Elon Musk invoked the names of two German Nazis in a tweet while simultaneously disparaging modern pronoun conventions - attempting, as he so often does, to make a joke. (I'm not repeating the text here - not because it's profane, but mostly because it's just not funny.)

For context, Musk was responding to a post about a Der Spiegel article that compared him to a media mogul who helped Hitler climb to power.

It was hardly Musk's first, and certainly not his most offensive, statement involving the Third Reich or their White supremacist progeny. Just last month, Musk promoted Tucker Carlson's widely condemned interview with a Nazi apologist who said the murder of Jews in concentration camps was "humane" and that Winston Churchill was the "chief villain" of World War II. Musk later deleted his X post that called the interview "very interesting" and "worth watching," per the Independent.

Representatives for X and Tesla didn't respond to CNN's request for comment.

Musk rarely deletes his social media posts, no matter how inflammatory. Also not deleted: the one where he reposted the "interesting observation" that women are incapable of independent thought and that only "alpha males" should make policy decisions.

And while he once apologized for his post endorsing an antisemitic conspiracy theory - the one that sparked an exodus of advertisers from X - he never deleted it, either.

The point is: Any other CEO of a major company could expect to be shown the door after airing any one these ideas. Or at least that was the case as recently as 2018, when more CEOs were forced out for "ethical lapses" than poor financial performance, according to a PwC study. 

So why is Musk special?

It's partly because of the way he's structured his wealth and his companies.

Musk is the single biggest individual shareholder at Tesla, the only publicly traded business he owns. The second-largest individual shareholder is his brother, Kimbal Musk, who sits on the board. In fact, the entire Tesla board of directors is stacked with Musk allies who lack sufficient independence, according to a Delaware judge who in 2023 overturned Musk's $55 billion pay package.

In other words, the only folks with a fiduciary duty to keep Musk in line are, according to Judge Kathaleen McCormick, not exactly disinterested parties.

But even bullish Tesla investors are starting to get nervous about Musk's rhetoric online and his "dark MAGA" turn, which could lead to some awkward moments on Wednesday's earnings call.

"The Musk/Trump dynamic has added to the agita of Tesla investors and it's not helping the demand issues in the US," Dan Ives, managing director at Wedbush Securities, told me. "Musk becoming more political is not bullish for the Tesla brand."

The other major source of Musk's wealth is SpaceX, a rocket manufacturer that's been tapped by NASA to resupply the International Space Station.

There are no public shareholders to worry about there, as SpaceX is a private company with virtually zero competition in the market. (Technically, it competes for space contracts with Boeing. But given Boeing's disastrous last five-ish years, SpaceX probably isn't sweating the competition too much - especially after NASA called on SpaceX to return two Boeing astronauts from the space station after their space ship broke down.)

Litigation is a key part of the Musk playbook when it comes to any person or group challenging him or his businesses. Angry at advertisers for leaving his Nazi-tolerating social media site, Musk sued a nonprofit ad group out of existence. In fact, Musk and his companies have filed at least 23 lawsuits in federal courts alone since July of 2023, according to Fortune, targeting "competitors, startups, law firms, watchdog groups, individuals, the state of California, federal agencies, and pop star Grimes, who is the mother of three of his children."

Bottom line: When you have virtually unlimited money, you have practically unlimited power to play offense – in court, in the boardroom or on social media.

[t1erradelfuego]

good evening. it is 22:18 pm. my flight leaves in 14 hours. i spoke 2 the moon today and she said that i can't start packing until i get rid of the worms in my brains and the narratives in my heart in the form of ao3 formatted fic ideas that rotate in my mind at the speed of light.

broken window serenade [matthew tkachuk/leon draisaitl] alternate universe - yellowstone fusion, childhood friends to enemies to lovers, internalized homophobia, cowboys & ranch hands Everyone knows the Tkachuks around here. They own the biggest ranch south of Montana, hundreds of hectares of grazing land nestled on the border in between Missouri and Nebraska. Leon's been a part of the ranch since before he could even ride a horse. He knows this place better than the back of his hand, knows his way around the business and the politics that come with being Keith Tkachuk's right-hand man and the leader of the ranch hands. So it's not a problem at all when Keith falls ill and the ranch is left to Brady and him in the meantime. Not a problem at all, when Matthew shows up for the first time in eleven years, like Leon hadn't spent the same amount of time convincing himself that Matthew was a figment of his imagination. That he didn't leave him in the middle of the night, didn't ruin everything and everyone else for Leon after that.

more notes: my toxic white middle age conservative trait is that i love yellowstone. look the show is Not The Best but WHATEVER i fucking love cowboy hats so much and i think for the benefit of my health i need to imagine leon draisaitl on a horse. anyways leon is a poor little canadian-german orphan (do NOT ask me how he got to missouri) who has been a part of the ranch since he was young, growing up with matthew as their friendship turned from deeply codependent childhood besties into fucking around together. and then matthew leaves one morning after he comes out to his dad and disappears for the next 11 years which ruins leon. and now keith's in the hospital with a stroke and matthew's back and leon just wants to run him over with a horse! something about the sincerity of childhood relationships and also the first bond you make in a new and strange place and the idea of being each other's comfort. and having that all taken away from you without a choice. and having it walk back into your life dressed in a business casual suit. there is also the version of this that exists. from matthew's perspective but like. always more narratively interesting to dig into the one who got left behind.

so good at being trouble [jack hughes/nico hischier] rule 63, alternate universe - celebrity, jack hughes is not a hockey player, getting together, secret relationship, mixed media, outsider POV, Pop Base @popbase Jack Hughes spotted with Nico Hischier, captain of the New Jersey Devils (NHL), at dinner in Los Angeles.

more notes: i'm not even a swiftie but the travis kelce and taylor swift of it all REALLY got to me. and then trevor's whole thing with the tiktok influencer and getting publicized via alex's ig is sooooo. and the wag christmas pics. i'm in shambles island over here. i'm gnawing on a bone that is pop star/professional athlete of it all. i want jack to show up slyly in the pictures and nobody knows if she's there because of luke or because of nico. i thought this would be full pov fic but it is so much more tastier as a mixed media/snippets in between type of fic because i want nothing more than to lean into the media machine that haunts their relationship. also luke having a meltdown that his captain and his sister are dating.

love is no island [trevor zegras/jamie drysdale], alternate universe - not a hockey player, love island fusion, getting together, no shirts no shoes but trevor still gets service, It was a joke, but it wasn't really a joke, because Trevor had been single for too long when he saw a post advertising Love Island applications appear on his phone. He's never been out of luck before, doesn't really know what to do without something to occupy his time and his hands. Even his social media algorithm knows this. It had been the best idea of his life. Then again, everything sounds like the best idea of his life after six shots and a fruity cocktail on an empty stomach.

more notes: ok i binged love island s6 throughout thanksgiving break and i've been thinking about the similarity of being put in a high-stakes fast paced environment and the semblance of intimacy that it creates in hockey and in love island. i'm thinking very deeply of trevor who can't sort his private vs public feelings and is also scared that this means nothing to jamie, whose friends signed him up on a lark and doesn't actually want to be here. nothing much to do but to fall in love and it feels a little too inevitable and maybe too easy. they sweep the voting and win the grand prize and fly back and go. oh. now what.

like the best that you've had [trevor zegras/jamie drysdale] rule 63, women in the NHL, 2023-2024 NHL season, getting together, "So like," Mason starts, having slowly skated his way over to Jamie as they're doing cool down laps. Practice ended an hour ago, but Trevor wanted extra reps at defending and to torture Mason for whatever reason, and it turned into keep and chase that ended with Trevor straddling Jamie, trying to face wash him on the ice. "You and Trevor a thing, huh?" They weren't particularly subtle if Mason's figured it out in his first practice with the team. Jamie blushes. "Oh. Good luck." Mason nods sagely, patting Jamie on the back before skating away quickly.

more notes: girl trevor is a female coyote who's ready to EAT. deeply inspired by top dog by magdalena bay. i've been thinking about the dynamics of women in the nhl (see: bingo board) for a long time and trevor would make the best girl in the game, so deeply sure about herself, loudly wants and hasn't ever felt shy a day in her life. i keep thinking about how jamie would go insane. specifically i wanna pick away at the dynamic that is being deeply in love with someone that everyone keeps telling you not to fall in love with. not that there's anything wrong with girl trevor but she looks like she chews on boys' heart for fun and spits them out clean as a whistle after. and she does! the first three months of living together, jamie runs into way too many guys that look heartbroken while getting kicked out like!

call this place my home [matthew tkachuk/leon draisaitl/connor mcdavid] rule 63, accidental pregnancy, developing relationship, polyamorous relationship, alternate universe, 2022-2023 NHL season Leon and Connor have been tied on the leaderboard for the past week, like they can't figure out who should win the Art Ross trophy this season, passing the puck back and forth in between them on the way to the net. They did the same to Matthew during Toronto, because they always liked sharing everything. Now she's staring at a positive pregnancy test. Go figure.

more notes: saving the best for last because THIS IS SO FUCK NASTY AND INDULGENT, i am not above this apparently. look i keep thinking about matthew getting pregnant and deciding to keep it and not knowing who's the father is and haha well the three of them have been. sort of a thing anyways. for the past year so maybe they should just? not figure out? and she's going to miss the rest of the season anyways so she might as well stay in edmonton. the baby's got to have canadian citizenship. surely. also german citizenship. the baby will play for team usa though. i think there are a lot of fun questions to explore like how do you acknowledge you are in a deeply committed polyamorous relationship and also how does having a kid change that. also how does having a kid change YOU and your own definition of love. how do you learn to put faith and hope into the wide changing world and trust that you will be okay no matter what happens. the pregnancy is actually a metaphor, you see,

[sidekick-hero]

15 people, 15 questions

I was tagged by my wonderful friend @maikaartwork. Thank you for thinking it interesting to learn about boring ol' me 😅💜

1. Are you named after anyone?

After someone being credit in a movie - that's how my mother found my name.

2. When was the last time you cried?

It's been some time, I don't really remember. I don't cry often. I get a bit misty eyed sometimes when I'm reading real good stories or with movies/shows, but not crying.

3. Do you have kids?

No. I never wanted children. If I ever find myself with the means for it, I can see myself fostering older kids because I hate that they have such a bad shot at getting adopted compared to younger kids and babies. But I don't see myself being a mother.

4. What sports do you play/have played?

None, I'm more someone who does individual sports like running and weight lifting or Krav Maga.

5. Do you use sarcasm?

I used to be very sarcastic when I was younger, it was my preferred kind of humor. But I found it to often come across negative and mean spirited, sometimes even hurtful. So I reeled it in, trying to use it only with the people who know me very well.

6. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Ufff. Their mood, I think. I'm very sensitive to people's moods.

7. What’s your eye color?

Green. My ID says brown-green but if anything, I'd say there are a few specks of brown and the green has a bit of gray? But yeah, simply put, green.

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings. Although a scary movie with a happy ending would be great.

9. Any talents?

Is overthinking a talent? Joking. I think I'm pretty good with words and with finding in and creating meaning with them. Also, I think my analytical thinking is kind of a talent.

10. Where were you born?

Germany, a small college town smack in the middle of it, surrounded by mountains and woods.

11. What are your hobbies?

Reading, writing, running, hiking, weight-lifting

12. Do you have any pets?

My beloved Bella, the most beautiful silly fur girl. She's a sheep-guarding breed and a giant white fluff-ball.

13. How tall are you?

170 cm

14. Favorite subject in school?

German, English, History, Politics and Philosophy

15. Dream job?

I always dreamed about working as forensic psychiatrist. But I also love my current job very much, even if it's in a totally different field.

Tagging (no pressure my friends): @thefreakandthehair, @firefly-party, @yournowheregirl, @scarcrossdlvrs, @t-boyeddie, @judasofsuburbia, @vecnuthy, @starryeyedjanai, @starrystevie, @steddieas-shegoes, @wormdebut, @matchingbatbites, @corrodedbisexual, @steves-strapcollection

[xxchthonicreaturexx]

Heyyy, I'm here for the Black Butler, romantic matchup!!<3 I already sent you the pictures.

To start of I'm a bisexual(?), but leaning more into hetero, female and I go by she/her. My mbti type is ENTJ, I'm an Aries with my moon in Leo and a Gemini rising.

I'm 168cm so 5'6ish and I have very long brown hair, I have an athletic/curvy body type. My usual style is a mix of "clean girl" and streetwear, but I do enjoy a more chic and feminine styles too. I follow certain trends and I have an interest for fashion. I wear glasses and I like expensive things.

I'm Russian/Iraqi and my heritage is very important to me, so I'd look for a partner that would be willing to put at least some effort into learning my native language for me, as I sometimes find it hard to express myself in English, having said that, I speak 3 languages fluently Russian, German and English and I'm currently learning French and trying to better my Arabic.

I'm finishing school right now and my grades are high, because I want to go to med or law school. I put a lot of effort into things and relationships that are important to me, I'd say that I am very loyal and I'm willing to do anything to protect people that are close to me.

For my hobbies I play the piano, game, paint and read (occasionally). I like any sort of physical activity but I mostly run and do CrossFit. I'm interested in basically everything that has do to with history and I love watching movies or series. (my current favs r the Witcher and suits). I like going to concerts and listening to music, I listen to everything but my favs r Nicki Minaj, Riri, Asap Rocky, Tyler, the creator, (old) Eminem, Kendrick, Ayesha Erotica, M.I.A, German rap and Russian pop, HEAVY on Nicki Minaj. I like lots of cute things like Sanrio, Hello Kitty, funko pops, cats.

I'm extroverted and I like talking, but it takes a lot for me to be 100% comfortable with a person and and fully trust them, as I don't like making myself vulnerable and I'm very independent. I'm pretty loud and I have very strong rules and beliefs. I like debating about things like religion or politics and I will absolutely argue with someone who disagrees with me if I have the chance to. I enjoy playful banter and bully/insult friends in a joking manner, but only if they reciprocate. I have a strong sense of justice and being fair is very important to me.

I will do anything to help my friends and family as they are very important to me, I would describe myself as a problem solver and a "natural leader" and I hate being ordered to do something, for me there's a difference between being asked and ordered to do something and I'm very sensitive to said difference. That said the next thing I say might make me seem like a bad person, but I often feel "superior" than other people, not in general but when it comes to certain topics like languages, hobbies or school. I trust myself more and I would rather do the whole project myself and get an A than have equal work as everyone and get a B or C, as I have high standards for myself and others. That being said, I would never outwardly act like I'm better than someone else. I'd say that I'm a mix of logical and controlled by my emotions. I always strive to be the best at things I care about, I stress a lot because of school grades, but except for that I'm very chill about everything else.

I used to be VERY insecure, so I do care about my looks and how I'm perceived, so I do try and appear "perfect" in a way, I'm very particular about the order of things or how I clean. I'm very neat, chaos and dirt annoy me a lot. I wouldn't say that I'm very forgiving, if the person has apologized I will respect them for that and won't act hostile towards them, but I will forever be wary of them and never let them close into my circle again. I'm also an all or nothing friend and will cut somebody off if they've wronged me or my friends.

I have been told by people that they where intimidated by me, having heard things like "I wanted to be friends with you but I was scared to talk to you.", I'd say that there are a lot of people who are jealous or mad at me, especially in my Arab side of the family, because I stand my ground now and stopped being an insecure, people pleaser.

When I argue with someone I tend to get loud and sometimes scream first and then distance myself. I still try to be empathetic even if I don't always know how to comfort people. Having said that my love languages are gift giving and quality time, mostly.

I'm scared of insects that aren't spiders or moths, being forgotten forever and dark places at night. I'm mentally pretty stable except for sometimes being an over thinker, a habit that I can't seem to fully get rid of and my ed, I have recovered but it never fully went away so I sometimes have reoccurring episodes of body dysmorphia and disordered thoughts, this is a thing that I basically only share with the most trusted people in my life, so I would like some reassurance from my partner sometimes. That's also why I'm sometimes weird with food.

I could be seen as a bit materialistic, because money is very important to me, but as a 2nd gen immigrant with one of my parents having lived in the Soviet Union that's just something that I've been raised to care about a lot.

I like receiving compliments and also like giving them, I also enjoy hanging out with friends and while I need alone time I also need a good amount of social interactions to feel good, I want my partner to be my most trusted person and someone I can always rely on, just like I want to be that for my partner.

Random fun facts: I want a snake and a cat, I like acting dramatic out of a joke, I'm told that I have a lethal resting bitch face and side eye 😔, I like love plushies and I have learned English from watching old cassette movies and I'm the mom friend

Thank you for reading this and drink some water:)

Hello hello! Thank you for doing the trade with me! <3 Sorry it took so long!

Edward Midford

I match you with Edward! Where to start...

In the school arc, Edward is placed in Green house, which is the house for all the athletic students. Edward is a good athlete and definitely could keep up with you when it comes to physical activity. He might have a hard time with JUST running, as he's used to fencing and cricket, but he'll get the hang of it quickly. He is an active man of course.

Edward may seem a bit bland. He's not a character that gets a lot of attention as opposed to his sister, Lizzie. But, from what I have seen he is a family man and adores his sister. That being said, once he finds someone he loves, he puts in a lot of effort. Just like you, he gives his all for his family, loved ones, and even schooling. I mean he got into the college he's gotta be smart-

He comes from a well off family. Money will never be an issue with him, and it's a given that he has to learn of other cultures for his status either way, so he'd be more than happy to learn about your heritage and even try learning your native language! He probably will struggle, as I'm sure he'll have plenty of other work to do ontop of studying a new language for you, but he definitely will give it the best shot he can.

You both are pretty extroverted people, and i think that goes well together! He isn't afraid to speak his mind, and neither are you. You two may argue a bit, Edward may say something a bit insensitive, or he might be spending too much attention on Lizzie other than you, and fights may leave you two distant for a few days, but he'll always come apologize with a bouqet and probably a kitten if it was bad. He knows you want a cat, and what better way to a woman's heart than a kitten?

Med or Law school would probably make his parents even more excited to meet you. They want a good match for Edward. They would've betrothed him to someone else had he not fallen for you, but you having a good head on your shoulders and the determination to have a good career really catches their attention. They're family people. They want the best match for their children, and want to think of you as a second daughter.

I feel like you two would overall just be a really good couple. Even when it comes to relaxing together. You could be playing the piano while he practices fencing moves. Just a good pair that is similar enough to get along well, and when you do fight, both care enough to drive their point until one apologizes. You two care a lot about your priorities, and theres nothing wrong with that!

Overall score: 8/10 Sometimes you may seem too similar, or he may not realize that he's not making time for you. But otherwise you two seem very good together :)

Runner ups: Joker (Book of Circus), Claude Faustus

Hope you enjoyed and thank you again for being patient!

[riflebrass]

I want to follow up my long ass post about the Nazis with a childhood memory that helped form my political views.

I was watching a Three Stooges short. Moe was running for office and promised like a 3 hour work week. Curley got so excited about this that he had to dunk his head into a barrel of water to calm himself down. Moe explained he's not really going to do it. It's just a campaign promise to get people to vote for him.

90 years later that joke has held up horribly well.

So when I said the Nazis promised all that stuff in the 20's it doesn't mean I believe this stuff despite painting it in a positive light. In the 30's Germany was an economic powerhouse, but that came at a horrible expense that we know all too well.

Fun fact, despite the fact the Volkswagen project promised cars to German people that promise was never fulfilled. Just another campaign promise.

[nicklloydnow]

“Very early, the young rebel Limonov got into the habit of regarding the dissidence born in the sixties with a mocking hostility, of pretending to put Solzhenitsyn and Brezhnev, Brodsky and Kosygin, all in the same boat: important people, officials, sworn authorities, each pontificating on his own side of the barrier, the first secretary's complete works on dialectical materialism stacked up next to the weighty tomes by the longbeard who plays the prophet. That's not for us astute lumpen punks, who've learned a thing or two and know full well that it's a huge exaggeration to call Soviet society totalitarian: above all it's chaotic, and anyone who's halfway clever can take advantage of the chaos and have a good time.

According to the most serious historians (Robert Conquest, Alec Nove, my mother), twenty million Russians were killed by the Germans during four years of war, and twenty million by their own government during twenty-five years of Stalin's reign. These two figures are approximations, and the sets they cover must intersect somewhat. But what's important for the story I'm telling is that the first profoundly marked Eduard's childhood and adolescence, and he did what he could to ignore the second because, despite his taste for revolt and his disdain for his parents' mediocre destiny, he remains their boy: the son of a subordinate Chekist officer, raised in a family that was spared the major convulsions of history and that, having never experienced absolute arbitrariness, thought that if people were arrested, well then, there had to be a reason. He remains a Young Pioneer who's proud of his country, its victory over the Fritzes, its empire that spans two continents and eleven time zones, and the holy fear it inspires in those Western pansies. He doesn't care about anything, but he cares about that. When people get to talking about the Gulag he sincerely thinks they're exaggerating, and that the intellectuals who denounce it are making a big fuss over something the nonpolitical prisoners (meaning run-of-the-mill gangsters) tend to be much more laid back about. Added to that, the dissidents' boat is full as it is. It's already got its stars; if he joins them he'll never be anything but second fiddle, and fat chance of him accepting that. So he prefers to snicker and say that people like Brodsky are full of themselves, that his banishment to Arkhangel'sk is a nice joke, five years—reduced to three—of vacation in the countryside with the Nobel Prize at the finish line, even if he doesn't know it yet: well done, Captain Levitin!” - Emmanuel Carrère, ‘Limonov: The Outrageous Adventures of the Radical Soviet Poet Who Became a Bum in New York, a Sensation in France, and a Political Antihero in Russia’ (2011) [p. 62, 63]

[thyandrawrites]

Sorry for bothering you! but i am learning italian and the verbs conjugations are killing me slowly shahshshajhshs do you know any app or easier way to learn it?? 😭

Hi! it's no bother at all, don't worry. But I'm afraid I can't be of much help. Being a native speaker myself, I never had the need to use apps for learning, so I don't know any! But if anyone reading this has any suggestions, feel free to add up.

I tried a quick search through the app store (android) and there seem to be a couple: link. I haven't tried any of these so I can't vouch for them tho. Maybe try to download a few that look promising and see if anything works for you. Some of them seem to focus on exercises, others on vocab or automatic conjugations.

As for things I've actually used myself, there's a website called coniugazione.it that I sometimes use whenever I want to double check something. You can input any verb and it will conjugate it for you and highlight the different endings. If you don't like this website, there's a lot of other sites that do the same thing. Just by looking up "coniugazione verbi italiani" I got half a dozen. Iirc even wordreference (the online dictionary) has the option "italian conjugation".

Idk if any of this suits your needs. In my experience apps can only go so far, so it's always a good practice to have a solid grammar textbook as well. A good resource if you don't have one but don't want to buy one blind is this masterpost. I strongly recommend checking out their collection. It looks like they have a couple of books on italian verbs amongst others. I've used this resource for german and japanese before

All that said, conjugation is probably the hardest part of learning italian. Don't be discouraged if you find it hard or frustrating. Many italian native speakers will relate basdajkfkas

In recent years a lot of the more complex tenses are disappearing more and more from colloquial and spoken italian (mostly as a result of teens reading less and less). So even amongst native speakers you will hardly ever use them. It was a bit of a running joke that one of our political parties can't use congiuntivo to save their lives so. Maybe that helps you feel better about messing up as you learn 😂 try not to be harsh on yourself, and good luck!

[kyrionkrackers]

isn't this what you wanted? (pt 1)

summary: you're new in town - when you finally decide to step out of your house, you walk into a bar and end up straight in the basement of a snuff film maker. life isn't so bad, but you want to learn more about your kidnapper. you decide to do that by taking matters into your own hands.

contains: choking, kidnapping, noncon, self-harm (at the request of strade)

also posted on ao3, here. please enjoy :)

part 1 - meeting

  It’s been a long time since you’ve last spoken to a stranger. 

  You moved over to this town from your home about a month ago, leaving behind all your friends and family without a word – ever since you’ve been wallowing in a sort of all-consuming self pity within the comfort of your home. You think that you might be running from something, but you don’t really know what it is. (Is it the weight of the expectations piling up on you, your spine collapsing and body folding in on itself under the pressure? Is it the nagging feeling that you don’t really belong, the incessant longing to find some sort of bigger purpose?) 

  When you finally decide to step out of your home, intent on meeting some new people, you find yourself entering a bar named ‘The Braying Mule’ at 4pm on a gloomy Thursday afternoon. The place is nothing special – there are a few rowdy groups chatting over mugs of beer, it smells of alcohol and you can barely hear your own thoughts thanks to loud music blasting over the speakers. It’s exactly what you need. You take a seat at the bar and order a beer from the tired-looking bartender – his eyes scan your face briefly, then he gives you a polite nod and smile. You think that it’s pity which flashes through those eyes. 

…

  “What’s a cute thing like you doing here alone?” A kind voice, tinged with a slight German accent. You’re sitting at the same place with the same mug of beer on the table in front of you, untouched. Someone slides onto the empty seat beside you and you feel him before you see him – his presence is warm yet imposing as he makes himself comfortable. You turn your gaze over. He flashes his teeth. 

  His grin is wide, friendly and inviting, radiating an inexplicable sense of charisma. He looks a little messy with his brown hair falling over the nape of his neck and the stubble lining his face, but not necessarily unkempt; you think the scar on his chin adds a sort of charm, and make a note to ask about it later. Hazelnut eyes – almost a yellow – pierce into you as he holds one large, calloused hand out. 

  “The name’s Strade,” he continues, undeterred by your lack of response. You hesitantly grasp his hand – it’s very rough – and you swear his grin widens. “What’s yours?” 

  “Oh. Me? _____. My name is _____,” you fumble, wincing slightly at the firm handshake he gives you. “It’s nice to meet you, Strade.” 

  You think you’re in for a long evening. 

…

  The evening doesn’t go as poorly as you thought (or perhaps hoped) it would. Strade, as you come to learn, is easy to talk to. He is friendly, effortless quips sending you into giggly fits and laid back demeanour lulling you into a sense of comfort. By the end of the night you’re exchanging jokes with ease, leaning ever so slightly into his large frame as you down your third cup of alcohol. Strade is patient with you despite your initial awkwardness, so patient that you find it hard to believe he’s real. Some part of you screams to be careful, that this seemingly perfect man can’t possibly come with good intentions – you decide you don’t really care. 

  You learn a lot about Strade – he is apparently a performer of sorts, though he won’t divulge what exactly he does despite your best efforts to make him crack. He tells you that the scar on his chin is from a shaving accident, that he loves meeting new people (you figured) and all about his past. In a way, he is similar to you, having left his home in Germany in search of some peace and quiet. You find something akin to a kindred spirit in him, one which makes you feel inexplicably secure and seen. 

  When the night begins to paint the sky black, you tell Strade that you should go home. The man tilts his head at you and, with an endearing sort of excitement, asks if you’d like to spend the night at his place instead. You give the offer some thought, then turn it down with a tinge of regret. As much as you enjoyed his company today, you’re not really looking for anything more than that right now, and you tell him as much. You offer to leave your number with him if he ever wants to meet up in the future – Strade regards your response with a sort of detached pity that sends a brief shiver down your spine. 

  You quickly pay for your drinks, thank Strade for the company and hop off the stool. As you’re moving away from the bar, you swear you can feel his gaze burning into the back of your skull – he stares with such intensity that your heart begins to speed up with discomfort and anxiety. Is he angry at you? Guilt eats at you as you make your way between the tables, towards the door – maybe he is angry at you. Strade has been an absolute gentleman the entire night and here you are, practically running from him. Here you are leaving him behind because of your own fears and worries when he’s been nothing short of perfect, when he hasn’t done anything wrong and you’re just being selfish again, and maybe you should’ve stayed at home after all, maybe–

  Strade calls your name from behind you – you turn around, and he’s standing now, making his way over to your side within a few large strides. He’s smiling, still, staring down at you with those piercing eyes. You feel so small next to his large frame and suddenly the guilt is gone, replaced by a sinking feeling that you can’t shake no matter how hard you try. He offers – no, demands – to walk you out. You see no other choice but to oblige. 

  The sense of comfort and security from earlier begins to fade away as the two of you exit the bar, leaving the crowd behind. Strade is practically a shadow always just one step behind, mirroring every step you take with a sort of practised ease that sends your heart pounding faster and faster. Are you overthinking this? He is still chattering away with the same friendliness and excitement from earlier, but something… something is different. He’s pushier now, just a little bit too close and getting under your skin with every question he asks. (“Is something wrong? Why do you look so scared?”) Under the dim illumination afforded by the flickering streetlights, his grin looks almost predatory.

  By the time the two of you are behind the bar, entering the sort of alleyway all horror movie sequences begin in (unfortunately the way home, and boy do you want to be home right now), you decide that enough is enough. It’s been three minutes, max, since you set foot out of the bar but it feels like it’s been an eternity with Strade looming by your side. His eyes are fixed to your form and there’s an emotion you can’t quite place dancing in them. When you thank him stiffly and suggest that he should leave, the smile on his face grows wider.

  In an instant you’re slammed against the wall, neck in his hand. A gasp escapes you at the impact and your hands fly up to claw at him, but it’s no use. Strade is larger, stronger than you and your head is spinning from all the alcohol you had – you can’t reach his body and you’re too weak to pry his fingers apart, so you’re left batting powerlessly at the arm holding you in place as he watches you struggle. He barks out a laugh as you begin to sputter and choke in his grasp, and you can only imagine what a pathetic sight you make right now, kicking, writhing, probably turning redder by the second. This was a terrible idea, you seeth as you glare at your assailant with as much menace as you can muster up. You should’ve stayed at home, you should’ve never–

  Strade mutters something in what you can only assume is German as he presses his body against yours. He’s close, too close – you can see every detail on his face, the crinkling in the corner of his eyes as they narrow, feel every deep, shuddering breath he takes. His other hand flies over your mouth as you try your best to make some kind of sound, any sound that could possibly get someone’s attention and help you find salvation and, god, he’s too close.  

  You want to scream, to yell at him, to punch him in the face and maybe give yourself a good slap for not listening to your gut earlier. Unfortunately, you’re hard pressed to do anything more than try to stay afloat as your body is deprived of oxygen and your vision begins to fade away.

  Is the sick fuck getting a kick out of this? You can feel yourself begin to slacken in his hold, the lightheadedness kick in to mix with the dizziness from the alcohol and as you stare into his excited eyes. It’s amusement, you realise with a small, pathetic wheeze, just before you completely lose consciousness – the emotion in his eyes is amusement. The last thing you see is the grin on his face, wider than ever.

… 

  You wake up in pain. 

  There’s an incessant pounding in your head that won’t go away no matter how much you scrunch your brows together, your neck aches and you can’t feel any of your limbs. Everything hurts, and you can barely remember your own name, much less you got here. Where the fuck are you?

  You look around and realise that it doesn’t really help much because the entire area is completely cloaked in darkness, making it hard for you to see even your own body. You try to get up but your legs are weak, and much to your alarm your hands are restrained by something. Despite your best efforts, you can’t free them from whatever is holding them down, and the only thing your attempts leave you with are sore, painful wrists when the feeling begins to return to your limbs. 

  You think that maybe panicking would be a good reaction right now, but you find that you’re oddly at peace with this whole thing. Perhaps it’s the headache ruining your ability to make good decisions, or maybe it’s the nagging voice in your head that tells you dying really wouldn’t be so bad. Either way, you decide to just stay put and enjoy the quiet for a bit instead of continuing to struggle for now. Even if you manage to get your wrists out of their prison, you feel like your legs will likely crumple beneath you if you try walking anytime soon. Might as well take some time to gather your thoughts.

  Bits and pieces of your memory begin returning to you during your wait, and your headache only worsens as you try to decipher them – a bar, a bartender and Strade – fuck, Strade. The charming, large German guy? The one who took you to the back of the bar and fucking choked you out? Yeah, that guy. It’s all beginning to make sense now, the whole pounding headache, achy neck and being tied up thing. You make an educated guess and assume that he’s the reason you’re here. Where exactly? You honestly… wouldn’t put it past the man to have some kind of secret sex dungeon.

  Speak of the devil. You hear loud, heavy footsteps getting closer from somewhere above you. A door creaks open and you watch as a ray of light seeps through the crack, casting a ray of light over your surroundings like some kind of fucked up angelic halo. It illuminates the area enough for you to finally see where you’re being held captive, and your eyes immediately fall on the table saw coated in something you’re pretty certain is dried blood. Not a sex dungeon, you realise with alarm – this is worse than a sex dungeon. You’d laugh at the absurdity of your situation if your throat didn’t feel like sandpaper right now – hell, you laugh anyway, though all you manage to get out is a pathetic whimper. 

  A familiar loud, barking laugh comes from the doorway in response; it’s Strade, of course it’s Strade, standing at the door in all his 172cm glory. He looks no different from how you remember him – maybe a bit less put-together, but you don’t suppose you have the right to judge when you probably look like a flaming piece of trash right now. His stocky frame casts a shadow on the floor, eyes practically glowing in the dark as they drink you in. He flips a switch on the wall and suddenly it’s too bright. You close your eyes at the sudden increase in brightness – Strade takes the opportunity to trudge over to you. You can practically feel every menacing step he takes, and you can definitely tell when he’s directly in front of you. He’s just so, so warm. You carefully peel open your eyes and sure enough, he’s squatting right in front of you, looking down with that same damned grin still in place. 

  “Good morning, kleine Maus! Sleep well?” Strade’s voice is still friendly, cheerful. His show of concern almost feels genuine, and you laugh at the thought. Your kidnapper, showing concern? Strade didn’t tell you about his talent in lying last night. You stare into his eyes and look for signs of his deceit. That amusement from before, hatred, a sadistic glint, anything – you don’t find it.

  “I asked you a question, buddy,” he reminds you after a brief silence – his eyes narrow so slightly that you would’ve missed it if you were not staring straight into them. You hum thoughtfully in response, which seems to be good enough for him even though the sound comes out strained and soft. He proceeds to look you up and down with so little shame and so much hunger that you can’t help but shrink back slightly under his gaze. Even though you’re fully clothed, you feel so exposed before him. Just when you begin to think it can’t get worse than this, he pulls a fucking knife out of his pocket. 

  “I have so many plans for you, friend,” he laughs, loud and boisterous. It’s cheerful enough that it throws you off guard for a moment – it’s not sadistic or mocking, like you’d expected, it’s just… a genuinely happy laugh. So happy that you can’t find it in yourself to be mad, even when he slices up your clothes with the sharp knife in his hands and leaves you shivering, stark naked before him. His next question throws you off guard. “Before we start, do you want anything? Water? Food?” 

  He asks this in such an honest tone that you find yourself at a loss once more. You almost laugh in his face – the man who choked you out at the back of a bar, the same man who tied you up in his basement, offering you food and water? Asking if you slept well, sharing his plans like he’s telling a friend about the next outing he has in mind? You want nothing more than to rip his facade of kindness into tiny little shreds, to tell him to stop pretending and just get on with it already, but there’s no facade to be found. At first you thought the friendly disposition he presented back at the bar was just an act to get you to lower your guard, but you’re beginning to believe that it’s just who he is. Strade is an enigma, and despite everything he’s done so far you find yourself longing to learn more. 

  “Water,” you rasp after taking a second to gather your thoughts. “Water would be great.” 

  Strade tells you he’ll go grab some and requests that you stay put– you humour him with a dry laugh. A minute later, he’s holding a cup filled to the brim with water and tilting it for you to drink. You open your mouth and gulp the liquid down with zero hesitation, which elicits a laugh from the German man. (“Calm down, it’s not going anywhere.”) 

  When you’re done with the entire cup your throat feels much better, your headache has subsided a little bit and you find that Strade is staring down at you with that same hunger in his eyes. The cup is left on one of the tables and Strade has a knife in his hand again – when he raises it, you brace yourself for the pain, only to be surprised when the things he cuts are your restraints instead of you. Your surprise must show on your face because Strade laughs, the same genuine laugh that leaves you wondering how such a happy man can be real, and how he can be such a fucking psychopath at the same time. 

  “You’ve been so good for me, liebe,” he begins, watching as you crawl to stand on unsteady legs and rub at your sore wrists. He’s not scared that you’ll retaliate –  he either thinks you’re weak or has confidence in his own strength which, on closer thought, are both pretty fair things to believe. Then he hands you the knife. “I thought I’d give you the chance to… ah, prove yourself.”   

  You stare down at the weapon in your hands and then look back up at your captor, mouth falling open slightly. Is this man… Did he seriously just hand you a weapon? After untying you? Where in the world did he get his confidence from? 

  “Now cut yourself,” he demands. When you comply with almost no hesitation, you realise that maybe his confidence is not entirely misplaced. 

...

part 2 here <