#Posting shit at 12 AM is my passion(¿

[mine-ventures]

How does one become a zombie rather than staying dead? Even a zombie bite in villagers don't always turn to zombification. What is the ruleset here? Mere chance? A certain affliction? RNG?

To become an Undead Mob (Not only just a Zombie for some of these), here in Minecraft, the most common reasons are:

... Just to put it in a very vage explanation, cause most of the time, it's hard to tell how an Undead Mob became, well, Undead.

[talesfromthebandgeekmafia]

Holy shit I love my job. Today is Tea loving her job day.

[voidsuites]

VOIDSUITES 10K CELEBRATION !!! ⌢ ✨ .ᐟ

so… 10k! 10,000!!! ten thousand little people in the world are following me on c.ai right now and that’s a little crazy to comprehend… they do say to do something you’re passionate about and people will follow, but this is just beyond anything i could ever imagine… so what better way to celebrate than with giving back to you guys!

for my mutuals… my lovely, lovely mutuals, here is your time to shine! if you want to send in a request, you can either:

send me a song along with your chosen character + the kind of scenario you’re picturing for it

OR

choose a prompt below and send it to me with the character you want! (if they’re shit my bad guys. lo siento 😭)

please send these requests to me via an ask— that way i can keep track of them in one place. just make sure you send them off of anon so i know who’s sending what :)

these requests can be based on canon or in an alternate universe (ex. think my fantasy bot release)

any character/media i’ve done is fair game! if i haven’t done a specific character yet but it’s in one of my fandoms then still send it my way!

like anything else, yap to your heart’s content! yap yap yap away… i love details <3333 the more the merrier

i’m going to take 15 requests in total, and i’ll reblog this post once they’ve all been filled. anything sent in afterwards won’t be done for this specific release (but i may hold onto them for later... hehe)

all in all, i just really want to say for the millionth bajillionth time thank you so, so much for making this a welcome space for me to be creative and interact with you all! you’ve all been so sweet to me and i really can’t convey just how much that means to me. hoping to get some long-form content out soon (longer than 2048 characters at the very least LOL) so keep an eye out for that! thank you for sticking around and following because you love messy tennis players, chefs that crash out at any minor inconvenience, kids who ride bikes and fight demonic entities in the 80s, big loser men who have issues, pretty women who can do no wrong, or whatever else that’s drawn you to my account here and/or on c.ai. couldn’t be more grateful than i am right now... going to go hide in my cave for the time being but each and every one of you is so loved by me i’m kissing all of u on the forehead okay bye

PROMPTS !!! ⌢ ✨ .ᐟ

1) “five minutes. all i need is five minutes.” 2) “i don’t know how long i can keep doing this.” 3) “you can’t be serious.” 4) “they don’t know you— not like i do.” 5) “stay the night. please.” 6) “do you wanna get out of here?” 7) “keep it. it suits you.” 8) “why’re you looking at me like that?” 9) “let me help you with that.” 10) “i just need more time.” 11) “you’ve got quite the reputation.” 12) “stay out of my business.” 13) “i believe you.” 14) “i wish i could hate you.” 15) “can i come in?” 16) “i have so much i want to say to you.” 17) “come on, it can’t be that bad.” 18) “like what you see?” 19) “you said this time would be different.” 20) “it’s very rude to stare.”

[gabrielsbubblegumbitch]

asking for Velvette Dx and/or head canons if it's not too much hassle! Plz and ty!

tw // suicide

I would like to preface all my posts on headcanons related to psychology and mental illness with a disclaimer: diagnosing mental conditions, especially personality disorders, can be extremely challenging. It's a complicated process that relies heavily on a psychologist's interpretation of facts, making it susceptible to biases. Personality disorders cannot be diagnosed based on surface-level observations and are not just labels that we can assign to people like in the case of MBTI. Additionally, I am not a clinician with any expertise in diagnosing people. Therefore, the following post should not be taken as a reliable professional opinion. It's simply my interpretation of the internal mechanisms that may be responsible for the behavior of certain characters in my fan fiction. Furthermore, I want to make it clear that I have no intention of stigmatizing people with personality disorders by associating them with villains. A personality disorder does not determine someone's character or make them a bad person. Some characters may be evil because of the choices they make, not as a result of their mental conditions.

So, as I mentioned, I headcanon Velvette as having an Antisocial Personality Disorder. It is characterized by lack of sympathy or empathy for the rights of others, while simultaneously acting charming and interpersonally manipulative.

❤️ Throughout her childhood, Velvette lived exclusively with her father in the impoverished and sketchy part of the city. Her father worked a lot to earn them living but at the same time he drank a lot and while drunk tend to be aggressive. Also he surrounded himself with bad people. In my mind Velvette can deal with Vox and Val's shit so well because since she was little she was surrounded by unpredictable and violent men. At this point she couldn't be less scared of them.

❤️ She endured relentless bullying during her school years due to her inability to afford stylish clothes and gadgets. This was particularly hurtful for her, given her deep passion for fashion. Velvette devoted all her free time to design stunning looks, harboring a fervent desire to be able to wear them.

❤️ Around 12, she figured that following rules was pointless, being in a disadvantaged position due to her family's poverty. The sole way to boost her social status, in her view, was to break those rules. This extended beyond minor offenses like stealing groceries; she engaged in more serious crimes, such as taking money, clothes, and jewelry from stores and individuals. She never felt any remorse for these actions; to her, they were merely a means to achieve her goals, regardless of the harm inflicted on others.

❤️ She never finished her education because sticking to school rules wasn't her forte. She had the smarts and charm to sidestep juvenile detention. Despite concerns from a few individuals, we all know how well the system deals with "troubled teens." Besides, her father wasn't bothered by psychologists' opinions as long as she was bringing in some cash.

❤️ As a young woman she used her charm to manipulate men and take advantage over them. While she contemplated sex work as an easy money-making avenue, she found men too repulsive to engage in it. Instead, her preferred method involved blackmail – she seduced married men, particularly the submissive ones drawn to her aggression and coldness. Through this, she gathered intelligence and skillfully weaponized it against them.

❤️ At some point, she blew up as this super popular influencer. It kicked off with her sharing cool, low-cost looks on the internet. People loved her sassy attitude and creative stuff. But as she got more famous, it stopped being about creativity and turned into a power trip. She built a cult-like following around herself and started abusing her power. Being openly mean worked in her favor online – people ate it up, especially when she got into online fights. No matter how wild it got, no one could successfully cancell her. Actually, I think Vox really admires her talent for stirring up drama. He pushed her several times to get on some reality show, thinking it'd make the ratings explode. But the darkest stuff Velvette pulled wasn't out there for everyone to see. It all went down in her DMs. She justified it as "finally getting justice from rich white brats," using her influence to get teens to pull off crimes and risky stuff. She even manipulated at least two depressed kids into taking their own lives. When shit hit the fan, and she knew prison was coming, she took it as one last chance to torment people. During a "live stream apology," she commmited suicide in front of thousands of people.

❤️ In the show, it's evident that she's downright rude. Not just to Carmilla and the other overlords, but also towards Vox and her own employees. The lack of sensitivity and respect for others, coupled with a strong sense of superiority and being extremely opinionated, are typical traits associated with Antisocial Personality Disorder (APD). My girl literally got song called Respectless.

❤️ She disregards any kind of authorities and when someone tries to impose their will onto her, she's going berserk.

❤️ She genuinely couldn't care less about what people think of her; she despises people that much. In fact, being hated now excites her because she knows she's untouchable and influential and it makes everyone even more angry.

❤️ She's extremely reckless, even if she knows it could hurt her – another trait associated with APD. While we observe Vox and Valentino able to behave when necessary, Velvette storms into overlords' meetings guns blazing and starts with insulting everyone, even though she aims to convince them to align with Vs.

❤️ She struggles to form genuine connections with other people. Still, she's got a soft spot for Vox and Val, sort of considering them her friends. At the same time, she sees them as just a couple of guys she can easily play to her advantage.

Vox hc | Valentino hc

[samsheughan]

Confession I guess?

I figured it's time I was honest with y'all. (below the cut; feel free to skip if it's not your preferred cuppa)

I know I don't owe anyone an explanation of any kind, but as I've always said and stood by, I hold what audience I have with the highest regard and respect and I feel y'all deserve more from me than just the occasional "thanks for reading!" you know?

That being said, I want to let everyone know that, it's official: I am writing an original novel that I do plan to have published as soon as possible. I am planning on this novel being a trilogy of sorts, so there will be multiple books coming from me! :D

I have been writing fanfiction since I was 12 years old. What started on a floppy disk has flourished into a passion that I will always be proud of and grateful for. Writing fanfiction has spared my life more than once, and in the process of writing fanfiction, I have made friends that I know I will have for the rest of my life. I am so SO so grateful to y'all.

However, as time has gone on, and especially in the last few years or so, writing fanfiction felt more like an obligation rather than the hobby it's supposed to be. And that's no fun. But trying to bridge the gap between fanfiction and actual fiction (aka, the kind you can get paid for) has also been a struggle. I had a hard time trying to detach the ideas I had for fics from their respective fandoms and convert them into something that could be an original novel.

I have tried to adapt some of my more popular fanfiction stories into original ones, but a lot of the fandoms I've been in just don't make that an easy prospect (even my Modern AUs are hard to adapt since what makes them Modern AUs is deeply embedded in their respective fandom). But lately, the fog from that cloud seems to have lifted, and I am currently working on the manuscript for my very first novel!

All that aside, you might be wondering: "but Liz! You promised us you'd finished your fic! You promised, you promised, you promised!!" And you're right. I did promise. A promise I still intend to fulfill. I am a woman of my word. Sutures will be finished.

Someday.

But the timeline for that finale is now offcially on an indefinite hiatus. I could wake up tomorrow morning and finish it all and then post it that evening. Or it could be 10 years before I'm able to get back to it. Who can say? I sure as hell cannot. And while I hope I won't have to make y'all wait that long, like Claire, I have a glass face and cannot lie. But I also have to live in reality: I am my family's primary breadwinner. We are all disabled in some form and I am no longer capable of working outside our home. Wolf hasn't been for some time, so us staying home with The Pup just makes more sense now that we have officially pulled him from public school to homeschool him ourselves. Doing something working from home is now my chief focus, and I have to do what I need to do to facilitate that. We are good for the time being though (so much so that I closed the gfm I started a few months ago, so thank you to everyone who helped us out in our time of need 💜)

It has been a lifelong dream of mine to become a published author. A writer of love stories, in every romance genre I can get my wee fingers on! xD I am now in a position to chase that exact dream, and I cannot wait to be able to share what I've been doing!

To the Outlander fandom: my heart is yours from the moment I saw y'all. You've held my spirit with your two hands, and kept it safe (hey, jammf would be proud of me for channeling him here, be quiet :P) I have had many ups and downs with fandoms but I am eternally grateful for the love and appreciation this fandom has showered me with and I hope y'all will continue to stick around to see what else I got up my sleeve!

Stay tuned! Good shit is coming xx

[jaylienpotter]

15 questions, 15 people

Thx for the tag @marauders-everything2

Starting a new post, it was too long. Slightly modified some questions.

1. Are you named after anyone?

Nope.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Don't remember, probably yesterday.

3. Do you want to have kids?

No thanks :)

4. What sports do/have you played?

My parents tried putting me in a bunch of shit when I was younger so I've done: swimming (for some years, still not great at it lol), surfing (quit after like 2 months), kizomba dance (hated it), another type of dance, contemporary dance (I liked it but the place closed), and we went skiing several times (which I love). If horseriding counts, I did that for a year. Currently not doing any.

5. Do you use sarcasm?

Yeah, sometimes. But I'm also quite direct and straightforward. Only "straight" I am.

6. What's the first thing you notice about someone?

Their fashion style. I love going up to strangers to compliment their outfits!

7. What's your eye colour?

Dark brown.

8. Movies with sad or happy endings?

I love movies with uncertain, ambiguous endings, in which the meaning is up for debate (like Inception).

9. What talents do you have?

Fast at absorbing information (sometimes), hypercreativity, great at bullshitting in academic tests/essays, good at making accents and voices, ummm... Can't remember more.

10. Where would you like to live?

New Zealand. It's pretty and one of the least problematic English-speaking countries (wanna live somewhere where English is the official language).

11. What are your hobbies?

Writing fanfiction and original stories (more like my passion), playing The Sims 4, drawing digitally (haven't in a while though), singing?

12. Do you have any pets?

My parents have 3 dogs (no breed) and koi fish. I want a cat :')

13. How tall are you?

165 cm or 5'5" for the Americans.

14. Favourite subject in school?

At college. Don't really like any of my current classes. Ig English C1.2 because we studied the Broadway play Hamilton. Although I haven't learned anything new.

15. What is your dream job?

Writer/author, would also like to do voice acting. Maybe a psychologist too, haven't decided if I'll take a second college degree.

No pressure tags: @siriuslystarbucks @starsandmoonys @whoopsiesnodaisies @star4daisy @starchaser-lily @half-cold-coffee @cazzythefrogking @starsarestories @my-beloved-fandoms @my-castles-crumbling @reggiecantswimm @artbyace @literallytoogaytofunction @rosemelodyshah @theres-an-endless-starry-sky

[kiestrokes]

i like had this thought in the back of my head of like what ateez would be like with an S/O who has a physical illness bcs i actually have one which causes a lot of pain to my bones and i'm like in a constant state of pain and discomfort, been going on for about 12 years HELL YA ✊🏻, if i don't keep up on my meds (currently don't have the proper meds so it only tides me over for a little while-) then im basically fucked so IDK i feel like there isn't a lot of stuff written about this kind of stuff (im a sucker for shit i hardly ever am able to read abt) ALSO IM NOT 100% SURE IF YOUR REQS WERE OPEN BCS I DIDNT SEE ANYTHING POSTED ABT IT SO- YA- if you don't want to write it obviously you don't have to !! no pressure at all lovely

ATEEZ Caring for You: Chronic Illness Edition | SFW

Pairing: ATEEZ x Gender Neutral!Reader/You/Yn Rating: SFW Genre: fluff, slice of life, headcanons, imagines, scenarios. Warnings: chronic illness + immunocompromised talk.

🗝️ Note: Hey atiny anon! You actually asked the right person; I have fibromyalgia combined with a few other annoying chronic illnesses. Because you can't just have one 😓 I hope that you can find a decent fucking doctor and get on the proper medication soon. That's the biggest part of the struggle, finding a physician that will listen and is competent enough. I hope this was enough, I tried to assign each member a caring task that I felt fit them! Has not been beta-ed.

Disclaimers: This is a work of fiction; I do not own any of the idols depicted below. 

Seonghwa 

He’s here to help you prevent all the chronic pain that he can. Booking you massage visits. Trips to the hot springs. All the arnica rubs. Silly little games the two of you play, to keep your mind off the pain and depression spirals. His favorite is seeing who can build their new Lego set the quickest. Hwa is the biggest advocate for you, he would never return a dish at the restaurant when its wrong. But he will fight for you at every appointment, every pharmacy, wherever you need him to. Because he knows you've grown tired of fighting all the time.

Hongjoong

HJ's specialty is flexibility. You have a sudden burst of energy? He’s down to go explore that new pop-up market with you. You’ve come down with a bout of bone numbing pain? That’s cool, you’re getting changed into comfy clothes and piled up on the couch. Swaddled in your heating pad with all the snacks. Where he falls asleep on your shoulder. HJ never gets frustrated with your rapid change in mood or plans. Nothing but the most understanding partner you could ever have asked for, and boy is he so cute and snuggly when dozing on you. Small hands seeking your face for drowsy kisses that soothe your aches just a smidge.

Yunho

The quiet presence, the one who knows what you need before you say it. Passing you tissues, making you a cup of tea and most importantly holding you so that you can cry. Shedding angry tears about how frustrated you are with your own body for betraying you. For feeling weak. For missing out on things. He's gently calming every frayed nerve in your brain. Reassuring you that you're exactly where you need to be in this moment, and he will bring all of the fun to you. And he does, in small, manageable doses.

Yeosang

His way of caring for you is through caring for your outside. All the skin masks, hair treatments, skin softening lotions because if you feel cruddy, at least he can make you feel cute and comfortable. They do heal though, in their own way. The extra moisture of the humidifier and every cream and essence he buffs into your skin helps keep some of the aches away. Subsiding the itchiness of the nerve pain, just a little. And you can’t get over how cute Yeosang looks in each animal themed headband or with his hair tied back into teeny space buns or how nice his hands feel every time they glide over your skin.

San

Where Yunho is quietly attentive, San is passionately attentive. You cry, he cries (while holding you). Quite literally your pain, is his pain and he’s here to be with you through each step. No judgment is ever passed when he has to pick up your extra chores around the house. Because to him, that is the smallest act of service he can perform for you. San is the one who wishes he could take on your pain, that he could fight it and destroy it and it pains him that he cannot. So he will simply have to do everything else.

Mingi

He thrives on making you laugh and smile through tough days, because he understands feeling burdensome. Mingi never wants you to feel that way, he wants to make sure you verbally know that your presence is needed and welcome. His favorite thing is cuddled up in bed with you wrapped in your heated blanket watching shows. You looking so small in his arms, giving him the feeling of protecting something. He reassures you constantly, because he himself seeks constant reassurance. Mingi never tires of this, he will reaffirm every single self deprecating thought with a compliment even on his worst days.

Wooyoung 

He cares for you with his skinship, which is incredibly healing. His happy heartbeat encourages yours. His strong hands make you feel loved and needed. Who would cuddle him if not you? Woo often reminds you, whispering the phrase into your ear as he traces his nails through your hair, or while rhythmically drawing circles on your spine. Making you float into dream land and anchoring you in the moment with him at the same time. Woo also loves making you whatever dish you’re craving, knowing you need energy to fight off fatigue and pain. And cooking is one of his many, many love languages.

Jongho

Needing to hoard all the extra rest you can get; you seek out solace at Jongho’s place for nap time. Jongho has taken notice, he’s also taken inventory as to which blankets of his you prefer, the pillows that keep you asleep the longest, what temperature you prefer the room to be based on what you’re wearing. All your favorite snacks before or after. New blackout curtains. He’s made his place your ultimate nap zone. New heated blankets. Duplicates of your fave lounge wear and socks. And he takes his payment in cuddles. Holding you tightly in his bed or sprawled on the couch. Sometimes he falls asleep himself and flips you onto your back to bury into your side like a full-sized teddy bear.

© COPYRIGHT 2023 by kiestrokes All rights reserved. No portion of this work may be reproduced without written permission from the author. This includes translations.

[sockysucks]

HI TUMBLR!!

ive come to create a incredibly lengthy post about the new mascot horror game called Indigo Park

I need to ramble ( haha rambley ) about it as i have just quit twitter for an indefinite time for my own mental health as an autistic cannot last on there at all

anyway, im going to talk about all the reason why indigo park is so good and what i hope from it!! and any criticisms i have for it, i honestly dont have many even though its so early to talk about.

how i found out about indigo park:

UNIQUEGEESE!! naturally, i was watching one of masons past streams on his youtube playing FNF after having rejoined the FNF community after its update and finding out about the mod HIT SINGLE; the mod masons was playing( people know it mostly for the silly billy song ) and he had mentioned about him making a mascot horror game which i shrugged off naturally because i am not a fan of modern mascot horror as most of it seems to be low effort and genuinely unappealing, i knew he had made something that was definitely made with love but i didnt have the will to check it out until a announcement trailer dropped which i then saw snippets of the game and the characters and environment, which i was definitely intrigued so I played the game myself.

My thoughts playing the game:

and found it surpisingly good compared to any other mascot horror game, it was unique, genuinely had awesome character designs and very high quality’s graphics and beautiful models and lighting were stunning, again really surprised having endured the hideousness of other low quality mascot horror games, to then find a game with fucking great models ( unlike banban, 2 billion polygon remote or whatever lmfao ).

I started the game and to be real as a extremely gay furry who loves little silly furry boys i felt like i was gonna explode during every single rambley voice line and animation played and fell so in love with him, now a massive comfort character and ive draw. him like 12 times prior to the games first chapter being released like 2 days ago lol, ive never gotten so attached so quicky in my life which definitely makes rambley and indigo park a really special game.

I really love this game, the pacing is really well done, the horror isnt low quality, the like actual character models for lloyd and molly are really gorgeous, i just think the hair and some of the texturing is over done slightly, but definitely made me shit myself multiple times despite this, all while i was laughing with my new silly raccoon boyfriend 💜💜💜💜

hugeeeeww shoutout to team neutron for the the absolute gorgeous expressive rambley screen animations and the credits theme that left me almost tbe same way portal 2’s credits effected me the first time i ever played and definitely huge huge props to otterboyva for the super adorable voice of rambley.

what do I hope for the future of Indigo Park

I hope for the future of this game that content farms and bootleggers disregard it, but this doesnt give me hope seeing that one rambley plush that a company made before the first chapter even released that was completely unlicensed. I will be avoiding social media in efforts to not see people start shitting on this game if it becomes on the same level and milked by content farms like what happened to the amazing digital circus ( i watched this on the day the pilot released, and was equally devastated as many others to see it being used as low effort bait in shitty kids cartoons on youtube shorts )

in case you didnt see i did a little animation at the top of this!! very rough but yeah

I love tgis game PLEASEEEE i cannot wait to see more high quality content from this really passionate creative team uniquegeese/mason has formed

in case you wanted to play it for yourself, heres a link to the steam page!! the first chapter is free and a kickstarter started a couple days ago has been completed funded so…. CHAPTER 2 IS CONFIRMED!!

[nsyncat]

OK, so this is my first post EVER since I joined Tumblr like ten years ago. Always been a lurker, enjoying all of the wonderful things here, the gifs, fics, ships, art, all the knowledge and all the amazing heritage posts, but never posting and hardly reblogging, I don't know why, was always afraid I would make a mistake or reblogg incorrectly...

Anyway, the reason this is my first time posting is because THAT amazing moment that happened a week ago, and I've been losing my mind ever since, and unfortunately I have nobody to share this excitement with that will understand... So I had to get it out somehow, and here seems like the perfect place to do so.

I don't know if anybody will read this or pay it any attention, but never mind, I just have TO. GET. IT ALL. OUT!

So I've been a loyal fan of 9-1-1 this past six years, got hooked to these kind of first responders dramas, also Station 19 and then of course Lone Star. I fell in love with the writing, the drama and action, the characters of course, the emotional and moving stories, both of the regular cast and the people in the emergencies (am not afraid to admit that I cried more than a few times, especially when I was pregnant... woooh, that was a tough season for me).

Anyway, like everyone else, got invested in Buck's storyline and of course hopped on the Buddie train in season 2. And obviously there was something between them, and the fandom always clowned themselves that "in the next season SOMETHING is going to happen!" and I always wanted to believe it, and also fooled myself a few times but always was the cold harsh realist and realised it was not going to happen... But enjoyed the ride nonetheless, read amazing fics, saw wonderful fanart, read interesting breakdowns and analysis.

And then 704 happened and I'm not joking or exaggerating, my life changed!

Confirming that Buck is Bi was amazing! I'm ashamed to admit that I really thought it won't happen, EVER! So I still can't believe it actually happened (thank you soooo much ABC!) and like a lot of you, I've been on cloud nine this past week and can't wait for tomorrows episode (also not from the US), literally counting down the hours.

And look, I love Buddie, I really do, but I fell in love with TEVAN (my favourite one yet) 😍 and been OBSESSED with them this past week. Just from those few moments between them and what we barely know that is going to happen the next episode, I truly fell in love with them and really hope they make it as far as they can. I think its an amazing thing for Buck and also CANT. STOP. WATCHING THE KISS! The actors did an incredible job, especially Oliver, also with his spoken support of the storyline and his love for Buck. Such a KING! So this whole thing is huge.

And I have a one-year-old, my life is hectic with taking care of a little human being, a hubby who is also very busy, work, family and a million other things and this past year with a heavy heart I kinda neglected reading fics, and it was my main hobby, my escape, my one and constant thing in my LIFE since I was 12. I do read here and there, but not like I used to, reading hours and hours and into the night, multi chapters and long oneshots, in multiple fandoms, and now whenever I do get to read something once In a blue moon I'm not fully invested or enjoying it because either I'm tired or have something else more important to do. And unfortunately, eventually I noticed that I lost this fire, the passion in me and it left me sad and heartbroken...

And then something incredible happened. Ever since that earth-shattering kiss, the fire and passion came back! Holy shit! I've been reading and ENJOYING fics nonstop this whole week, I can't concentrate on work thinking about everything and reading in-between tasks, I use every single free minute I have to search new fics and scroll through the tags, I go to sleep late because I need to read just one more fic(!!!) even tough I have to wake up very early in the morning and I DON'T EVEN CARE. I'm thinking about it sooo much and imagining new scenarios in my head, and feeling giddy and happy, in a good mood a lot of the time, more optimistic, knowing I have a new and exciting place I can "escape" to, like I had in the past.

Its not that i'm not happy, I have an amazing son and a wonderful husband and I cherish every moment with them, but these are hard and difficult times and life can be hard and stressful and I'm a different kind of happy... So these past few days have been nourishment for my soul and my mood, it sounds so silly but its true! I'm feeling a bit like my old self and it's amazing.

And if someone did read this or did pay attention and got to this point, sorry for the long rant and thank you so much for the patience and understanding 🙏 I love you and wish you a wonderful weekend and happy Buck's-first-date-with-a-man day! 🥰

So I want to thank, from the bottom of my heart, ABC, Oliver, Lou and you crazy lot for resurrecting my old fangirl self 😌 I'm so grateful for all your posts, your takes, your similar enjoyment and of course your amazing fics you're writing and sharing 🩵

[bikenesmith]

ive noticed some engagement on some of my monkees (shit)posts from way back in 2012/2013 — my 14/15 year old self. which is endearing, bc im aware the monkees fandom is still going, and is perhaps even more active than it was in my day. this did remind me of a @fansplaining article by allegra rosenberg / @areyougonnabe that i finally got around to reading earlier this week, the beatles live!

(i have no idea how long some of you have been here, so to recap i was fully obsessed with classic rock bands and 1960s/70s pop culture from like, 12 to 15 years old. profound impact on me in many ways, still love 60s/70s music, culture and history. also lmfao at my fandom of the last near-decade being sparked by a film set in the 60s. the several page video essay script about x-men first class' anachronistic 1960s fashion, which is sooo close to actually being filmed, will likely be the ultimate culmination of it all) the beatles were my first music fandom — while i still have feelings for the monkees [obviously, considering my ~12 year attachment to this url across nearly all of my social media] it is the beatles that i still have brain worms for. a tiny, isolated worm, but one nonetheless. so this article, i had to read.)

i was really taken by this section on the anachronistic modernizing of beatles fandom activities.

It takes a certain stripe of fannish brain to obsess over music from a bygone age instead of modern artists—taking something as broadly popular as classic rock and treating it with all the intimate, loving attention that other fans devote to a sci-fi television show, a fantasy book series, or a cult video game. These fans are cultural archaeologists, working with the materials of the past to create the passion of the present. The phenomenon is not limited to the Beatles. On TikTok, fans place meme tweets on pictures of the Stones and Bob Dylan; celebrate Freddie Mercury’s style; and make Monkees fancams. But the Beatles fandom is still top dog, with a kind of default dominance it retains from the dawn of Beatlemania. On Tumblr, you can find gifsets of Beatles movies, fanart, and the occasional Yoko Ono stan post, side by side with more typically Tumblr-esque wackiness along the lines of Paul McCartney posts tagged “#my twink wife”, “Maxwell’s Silver Hammer” memes, and toxic yaoi polls.

it made me think about how this phenomenon — the blending of modern fan practices and modern pop culture (fancams, memes, insaneposting, etc) with classic rock fandom is not new (not that allegra insinuates it is — i am speaking generally), but is something that has been around for a while, and is something i participated in quite heavily when it came to monkees fandom. whether it was

editing a music video to the tune of marina + the diamonds

making art of mike nesmith as a genderbent marina + the diamonds analog

not to mention the entirety of the who (slight flashing tw)

creating mockups of a classic rock-themed homestuck/OFF/undertale/earthbound analog:

classic rock icons using homestuck icons as a base

blending classic rock into my ~aesthetic~ blog theme sensibilities:

this video where i did nothing but put the beginning of baby got back over a scene from the first episode of the monkees and the music lined up almost frighteningly well

or creating emo notepad screenshot aesthetic posts with quotes from head (1968)....

i was very invested in engineering (or maybe just yearning for + acting out desires?) a form of classic rock fandom that was "hip" to the modern fandoms i was aware of. this was likely inspired by the fact that monkees fandom at the time skewed older.

i cannot for the life of me find these accounts or screenshots of them, but i think the ultimate expression of this was a collection of twitter accounts i made as mockups of twitter stan accounts, modeled directly off of one direction accounts at the time. complete with icons that were cut-outs of musicians overlayed onto aesthetic background, and descriptions that noted how many times the musicians had interacted with them.

importantly, i could not have sustained this if not for the close friends i had at the time that were around my age and were on my wavelength, that supported it, commiserated with me, made lots — especially on the homestuck parts. even if it was a small thing, in a small fandom, it was a communal effort

idk. its interesting to see that these dreams of mine have now come to fruition.

abrupt stop, no conclusion bc this is just a post not an essay (a comment directed at my autistic ocd self). may be interesting to some of the nouveau classic rock fandom.

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 30/12/2023

The Paragoomba and the Wiggler

Season 7 Featured on: SGFR Presents: RIP²

Ripped by 601billionlazer Performed by vvslogs

Hey, look - its close to the new year, its past midnight as I'm writing this, and I'm feeling sentimental. I know I could be putting more delicacy into my choices for these last days of the year, but please allow me to be be a bit vulnerable today.

I started making these posts seven months ago. A month later, I made the full commitment into making it a full-on BLOG-blog. That is, a blog to truly let me spill my heart over, beyond just writing one or five sentences per rip, to ensure none of my feelings get left on the drawing board. It was never something I did to catch a wave of fame, or to show off on a resume: top to bottom, this blog began as a distraction from work, and has turned into a full-scale love letter for a project that has helped shape me into the person I am today. Now, with *this* project, I've found motivation and confidence: I've had the opportunity to reignite my passion for writing, satiating my lust for analysis and discussion, and most crucially providing a thank-you to a group of creators that have always felt woefully underappreciated.

What I never really expected, was to have those same wishes returned back to me.

From the ask box, to the messages, to the Rippers' Commentary reblogs, to the discussions held in the SiIvaCord and on Discord DMs themselves, its those heartfelt words, that gratitude and joy, that keeps me driven to continue this blog until I'm all wrung dry. I've long considered myself terrible at maintaining connections, yet with each message I receive it feels as if I've made a new friend, their words of support and love never leaving my mind no matter how much time passes. It still feels like I'm somewhat of a shut-in, yet I've had the ability to talk to so many more incredible people in the back half of this year alone than I have for so much of my life before.

So, with all that sappy shit said - The Paragoomba and the Wiggler goes out to one of those people. It was only a few weeks ago this month that I covered vvsvlogs' prior work on Wham! Into Dreams, and just how much her singing truly resonated with me. As soon as that post was done, I just...felt a need to know, if she'd done any more singing work for the channel, and she was kind enough to point out her contribution to RIP² that I'd somehow completely missed. A rearrangement of an immensely simple but effective Season 1 rip, The Paragooma and the Wiggler is still a mashup of a Super Mario Bros. 3 theme and an Owl City song, yet now with a far more lively, dynamic instrumental thanks to 601billionlazer's arranging, and with vocals wholly redone by vvsvlogs, as mentioned before - and, indeed, just like Wham! Into Dreams, I connected with the rip almost immediately after listening to it. There's of course also new life injected into the non-vocal half of the song through the rearrangement, new sound effects added to punctuate lyrics, an ebb and flow maintained with the instrumentation alternating between the original chiptune sound and a plucky piano. With all that said, its an incredible rip top to bottom, showing just how talented of a singer vvsvlogs is above all else - I daresay the new vocals full-on crush the originals for me.

Yet, there's a reason I wanted to put that big sentimental introduction to this post in particular. Because back when I first discovered Wham! Into Dreams years ago, I may still have been a devoted fan, but I was a wallflower althesame: barely in the SiIvaCord, barely in discussions with anyone other than the occasional YouTube comment. It's only through all of the aforementioned outcomes of running this blog, the people I've met and the messages I've received, that I finally feel truly at home with this community - that I found the courage to reach out, talk to, and send my sincerest thanks directly to these incredible creators, with at least SOMETHING to show for it. vvsvlogs is just one of a dozen or two people I've gotten to talk to through doing this blog, and it never ceases to warm my heart - both finally getting to talk to people who've indirectly pulled me out of dark times through simply doing what they love, and through knowing I've been able to make so many of them smile from the words I'm putting onto this darn page on a daily basis.

Happy new year, SiIvaGunner team. To all of you in the team reading silently without accounts to reply with, I hope you know just how much I love you.

<3

[yichens]

Top 5 kisses in BL 2023

Top 5 fashion choices in BL 2023

Top 5 aesthetically pleasing BL in 2023

monica my beloved ♥ thank you so much for sending me all three of these!! i made separate posts for the other two here and here, but let's get into kissing now, shall we!

-

My Top 5 BL Kisses in 2023

I. PuenTalay in Our Skyy 2 x Vice Versa episode 2

listen, i know i am extremely biased but i am just OBSESSED with the parallel included to this kiss. p'x was high on something, having visions, incredibly galaxy-brained when he decided to remake puentalay's drunken kiss in their final episode. with the same dialogue and puen's soundless 'i love you' no less! this kiss is extremely beautiful and so meaningful and gosh. owns my whole ass ♥

II. MorkDay in Last Twilight episode 6

the rooftop kiss coming to compete with all the legendary rooftop kisses! absolutely feral over how this scene goes, how it starts with one tentative kiss (careful, scared, almost chaste and innocent, child-like) and then turns into all this hunger and desperation and determination and anger and grief and confusion and delight and relief. this is pure insanity. i know they're about to top this some time soon but ugh, true cinema.

III. LomfonTien in LaPluie episode 12

i was waiting for this kiss like i was about to drown without it and it did not disappoint. i think i replayed this scene like ten times once it happened bc it was just so good. very nice, very fulfilling. i hope these two get a second season so i can see more of them being crazy about each other and sort out whatever mess the universe has planned for them.

IV. JokeZo in Hidden Agenda episode 8

i know they have a full-on makeout session in this episode bc it's their first time and everything, but i am genuinely in love with this specific moment. there is just something so... intimate? humane? real? about the way joke brings zo with him into the bedroom and then sets them both down like this. it brings back memories, and maybe that touch of real-life connection makes this kiss so important to me. they're sweet, they're in love, and this kiss is a testament to that.

V. SandRay in Only Friends episode 9

i was straight up screaming when this scene happened for the first time. idk how firstkhao did it, but on some level, this feels like sandray's first kiss. it's so full of anger and passion and desperation and love and fear and. yeah. it's just a very impactful kiss, so it has to be here. some lives were changed. especially when this is impro??? oh christ alive.

Bonus: HeartLiming cheek kiss in Moonlight Chicken episode 8

this is the cutest shit. my heart fills with joy when i look at this. they're my precious beans and they're together and in love and everything is right in the world ♥

-

thank you monica, i love you so much ♥ i hope you enjoy these answers!

[cyberspookviv]

my experience with the hazbin/helluva hatedom and how I continued to hate myself from there on TW: vent/s*icide/problematic stuff

I guess I was lowkey kinda young when I found out about Hazbin/helluva (around 2023 and I am a minor around 12-18) I know i shouldn’t be watching that shit and considering how bad the fandom is now with kids I feel guilty but it wasn’t that “big” back then I didn’t like it at first but then I tried it some more there was too many cursing it kinda made me scared for once and a while but I sorta liked it? Maybe because it was my first experience with violent content? Idk ajsjdj

yet little did I know that it would be considered one of the most hated fanabases I seen in my entire life

I guess it was a primary fandom I was really into as embarrassing as it I just fell in love with the characters and lore a little “too fast” this was such a fun fandom to make aus and theories because of how fun the lore was it wasn’t good at all but atleast I had “fun” right? Sometimes now I thinking about it I was too obsessed with it and hell I was so distracted by all the fun stuff about it that I forgot about the criticism in the first place i wasn’t immune I tried to take it by watching videos online but it was….. harsh…. And shit hell sometimes I was kinda immune bc I still needed to continue most of hb lol but…I guess it got to a point where it felt…kinda bad maybe “too” flawed so I got scared I had experience with my interests being despised before and I didn’t want the same to happen again so I tried to defend it and that’s where the creator….comes in…..

.

I thought her imagination was…fascinating she had such passion and thought behind her shows…that she became… my role model…. So I tried to defend her…but tbh nobody really seemed to like her I tried sticking to people who defended her like ayy lmao

but then I realized about the stuff she did…

It make me look like a damn fool…

and what’s even worse people who defended her were called “dick riders” I then started seeing hate around her “with the written by vivziepop jokes” and the controversies on Twitter

I got anxious…. But at the end she was a bad person right…just separate art from the artist

but nobody liked the art either

Hazbin finally came out and there’s was either love or hate and tbh I got really back into Hazbin bc of the release of it being on “prime” but I knew something didn’t feel right I went on Twitter a lot “too much” actually and i discovered these rumors about her and if I defended these rumors about such terrible things I would just look like such a stupid pathetic dick sucking retard so I forced myself to hate her either way so I forced myself to go online and read “hh/hb critical” content but then I began to hate myself even more they painted her as such a terrible person but i agreed anyway because it was the “truth” but then again she was my idol…my role model….i got so anxious and I never even gave a damn about the shows writing making it even worse when it came to criticism it was noticeable in the show but I choosed the ignore it and when I saw ppl complaining online I felt like a complete pathetic asshole for liking it and what’s worse they would say shit like “she’s manipulative and narcissistic and her fans are nothing but dick riders that are thoughtless and can’t take criticism and deserve to die in a fucking fire” it made me want to absolutely k*ll myself and made me feel like i wasn’t worth living

THIS SHIT FUCKING EXPLAINS IT ALL

I wanted to talk to somebody or a therapist desperately about this but I loved her and her shows so either way my behavior was fucking creepy making me hate myself even more because my story was never “valid”

so I just ran away

I’m doing better now….i still miss the shows tho even though most people call it “toxic” for supporting a “horrible” person but still have that charm when i see it or see posts about it it makes me remember how “happy” i use to watch it and the fact that i had to ran away a join better fandoms that were accepted by people and wouldn’t make me feel ashamed and wanting to end my life i just finally…finally decided to share this post now despite how controversial it may get i might honestly get death threats or hate comments tbh lol

but I just want some people to know out there about my experience because I just desperately need a heartwarming comment right now to make sure that I’m not alone please…I just wanted to have fun I’m doing better now…. I just want everything and I mean EVERYTHING to be ok…

I just want to be accepted…..

.

[mazm-imagines]

Notice! (NOT THE END OF THIS ACCOUNT I PROMMY)

Aheeem aheem wheemper...

Hi guys. Sorry for making false assurances again... just forgor to get to the halloween asks even over my fall break. However I do want to talk about certain things. I want to explain this creative block and for a moment just be vulnerable on here. There's been so much in my life right now I've been feelin like dogshit and then last night i was talking to a friend snd it all clicked. This is a really long post so I'll put it under a cut.

I have to admit... my passion for mazm is dwindling a bit. I wont be dropping the blog or anything not at all. The memories I've made here cheered me up when I was at my worst moments.

I like to write and draw to make people happy. I remember when I was 12, I came onto mazm tumblr tags to just look at things. I came across an incorrect quotes blog, and while I don't think it was the highest effort content, it still put a smile on my face because I could tell whoever ran it was passionate. People were passionate. The mod left around 2020ish??? And i remembered being so sad.

It's hard to make content for small fandoms. Heaven only knows others have it worse... some only have 3 people instead of 5/lh

I've watched mutuals leave the fandom as they lost interest. Which is completely normal like it happens. But it just. Sucks. Its hard to make art/writing when you dont have people to exchange ideas with. I know I should be writing for myself, but I also would like to know that there are people reading and watching. I want to make people happy in the same way i was happy in the past.

But the dwindling activity on here + the lack of participation in the community events such as MazM week makes me want to give up trying sometimes. Not giving up trying to write nor answer asks by any means. I do those of my free will. But give up trying to reach out. I absolutely hate forcing interest, i don't like to harass others.

As i grow older, and younger members join the fandom, i start to feel a disconnect. Not because they are doing anything wrong, and I am happy that children get to enjoy MazM the same way i used to. It's more that my tastes mature, but i don't have anyone to discuss it with. It feels strange.

There's also the fact that I've always been more fond of MazMs original works such as Pechka, Thy Creature, and Hyde and Seek. I like Phantom of the Operas more original aspects ironically, but was never quite fond of Jekyll and Hyde. I often think a large part of MazM discussions involve the adaptations rather than the original aspects. Which again, I feel a bit out of place with.

All of this, and it starts feeling a bit lonely... I must be self pitying because the discord is pretty alive and I do see people in the tags. I appreciate all the creators i see, from the bottom of my heart. Everyone that creates something or speaks their mind or participates, that is what keeps it alive. If anyone ever wants to reach out to me I am more than happy to talk and share ideas.

But I've felt my old work was juvenile. I keep rereading my current work and looking at my current art. I keep feeling "not enough". Its leaked over to my other interests too like IDV. I have to drop one of my biggest projects because I've lost passion for some of the characters due to lore shit. And the other fic, I just couldn't read my prose without cringing. Which sucked because that project was for myself, it wasn't meant to be serious it was just yume shit. But... maybe that just reflects upon how I feel with myself now. That if no one reads, then I must be doing something wrong.

I love mazm from the bottom of my heart, I admire the team so much. It's why I started to draw seriously, it's why i started to read and analyze seriously and heavily influenced my writing. I AM MAZM FAN NUMBER 1!!! i am super excited for the new edgar allen poe game of course i am. It's just seeing the team members leave one by one and the format change so drastically... i don't know. The magic is different. But I will always support MazM despite it all.

So this is where I am now. Burnt out, unable to look at my own creations properly, cold lasagne hate myself. All very kafkaesque im sure. I don't want to put out low effort posts, so that's why I've just been keeping my askbox preserved. To all the people that sent me asks, thank you so so so much. You guys are the reason i am not letting this blog go anywhere. And I am very sorry to keep you all waiting.

[artisticdemon]

FUCK YOU OUTLAST!!!!

Waking up to Outlast posts isn't how I wanted to start my day but here we fucking are.

I can't put it in words how much I HATE the Outlast franchise. Now before you shoot me, the games are good but I hate them with a burning passion on how scary they are.

Someone will say "Well duh Spy, it's a horror game franchise." YEAH NO SHIT SHERLOCK!!!

Horror videogames most of the time make me jump and maybe scream a bit from time to time, the first Outlast made me cry out of fear. And I haven't never played it, I only watched a walkthrough! When the doctor appeared I lost it! I DON'T LIKE BEING CHASED! I PREFER TO BE THE HUNTER THAN THE HUNTED IN GAMES!!!

But I didn't stop watching because I needed to see how the story ends. Also I was probably 11 or 12 when the first game came out and I think that was truly the first time I have ever seen a horror game and in my little brain it didn't occur to me that I could just google to see how it ends...

AND THAT FUCKING DOCTOR, OH THE FUCKING DOCTOR!!!! IN THE ELEVATOR SCENE I THOUGHT HE WOULD COME BACK TO LIFE AND KEEP CHASING ME!!!!

Also fun fact about me: I can't scream and when I have the urge to scream I keep it down and scream internally which makes it 10 times worse!!!! Thanks a lot mom for that with your shushing!

Another fun fact about me: If you shh shh me I will scream back at your face "DON'T YOU FUCKING SHUSH ME!!!!" and scare the soul out of you.

It's only 8 am and I'm already pissed for the day.

Perfect.

FUCK YOU OUTLAST!!!

[ephemerasnape]

You post a lot of stuff that is considered dark or disturbing. Do people get frustrated about it?

I usually avoid mentioning that I'm into it and lately been thinking that it is a very unhealthy situation. Should I really be hiding a part of myself for the sake of some internet person who I don't know because they might get traumatized by the idea?

You seem very comfortable with your fantasies and preference. Is there way to do the same and still fit in the fandom?

Well consider this can of worms open!

Honestly, until recently, no, and I have been posting dark stuff since.. July or thereabouts? Since then people have mostly left me alone to do my thing.

But someone getting upset over the mere existence of my content doesn't bother me. The only thing that does bother me is when I feel blindsided by a negative response that I didn't really foresee as a possibility.

Feel free to hate my content. That shouldn't translate to hating me. Trust me - I hate a lot of other people's content too!

I understand that there is a risk of a negative response when I share something truly disturbing, so when I put my dark fiction, audios, et cetera, out there (some of which disturb even me), it doesn't surprise me that some people react badly to them. I am prepared for it to a degree. It's not ideal, but it's something I usually just laugh at. Actually, I am a little surprised it has not happened more frequently.

As far as fitting in with "the fandom," or fitting in anywhere else for that matter, I gave up on all that around the age of 12, so... it's a struggle I simply cannot relate to.

Black sheep? Who you callin' a herd animal???

I just do my own thing. It would be nice to feel more part of the fandom, but the whole "outside-looking-in" syndrome is a permanent fixture in my life.

Does it seem to an outside observer as if I fit in with the Hogwarts Legacy fandom? If so, it's probably a "fake it til you make it" type of thing. I am not in any discords except my own, none of the "big names" ever really reblog or interact with my stuff except on rare occasions.. I try to talk to people and they ignore me, and that's fine (OK IT'S NOT FINE 😭).

I do fucked up shit with characters that are far from the most popular - some of my more mainstream stuff has gotten a lot more traction. But I also know a lot of people enjoy my work who do not wish to draw attention to that fact.

I am decidedly and passionately myself, at great social cost at times. Being less authentic is something I am actually working on, in order to have a more robust social life at the very least, but it honestly requires too much emotional work from me to behave in a way that doesn't feel authentic to me.

That said, I am lucky to have a small but dedicated group of witches who are either ardent fans of my work or are otherwise supportive of the kinds of fanworks (and jokes) I make. We have a discord if anyone wants to join. No doxxing required (saw a new HL discord that makes you submit a photo ID???? Hard pass.)

This being Tumblr, indulging in degenerate fandom stuff is kind of the point.

So, let's do it!