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yandere-daydreams · 1 year ago

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Title: Idolification.

Pairing: Yandere!Itadori Yuuji x Reader (JJK).

Word Count: 5.0k.

TW: No Curse/College AU, Fem!Reader, Non/Con, Prolonged Stalking, (Unintentional) Emotional Manipulation, Oral Sex, Drunk Sex, Unprotected Sex, Age Gap (Reader's 27, Yuuji's 22), Intimidation, Brief Mommy Kink, Pepper Spray, and Obsessive Behavior. Dead Dove: Do Not Eat.

“I’m so, so, so, so sorry.”

“It was an accident, you don’t have to—” Yuuji was cut off by another splash of milk, quickly followed by another jet of water. Her makeshift treatment was harsh, the temperature alternating unpredictably between ice cold and scalding hot, but Yuuji took the abuse with a smile that was almost bright enough to distract you from the red, aggravated skin around his eyes. Almost. “It’s alright,” he managed, eventually, doing his best not to sound like he was being slowly drowned in your bathtub. “Believe it or not, that’s only the second worst thing I’ve gotten in my eyes.”

Knowing him, it was probably closer to the fourth or fifth, but that did little to ease your guilt. He’d been leaving as you were getting home from your second twelve-hour shift of the week, and from there, it’d been a comedy of errors. He spotted you coming down the hall, haggard and bleary-eyed, and saw the babysitter who’d spent more summers than not keeping him (and, by association, his older half-brother) out of trouble before their family fell off of the face of the planet, and reacted the way Yuuji reacted to most things – with open arms and a contagious smile. You’d looked at him, a far cry from the kid you’d spent so much time looking after, and seen a very strange, very grown man loitering outside of the door to your shoebox of an apartment before charging towards you with a manic expression and, well, you had always wanted an excuse to use the pepper spray you carried near-religiously. It was only a shame it had to be on someone as sweet as Yuuji.

Now, you were on your knees on the floor of your bathroom, your fingers tangled in Yuuji’s hair as your roommate gently waterboarded him with a cartoon of organic oat milk in one hand and your decade-old showerhead in the other. The front of his t-shirt was soaked through, his lung half-flooded at least, but he was still grinning like you’d greeted him with a blank check and a litter of puppies. “Honestly, it’s on me,” he insisted, his enthusiasm too potent not to be genuine. “Miss Shoko mentioned she was living with someone.”

At the mention of your roommate, Shoko Ieiri, your attention shifted to the woman in-question. You weren’t an idiot. After the shock died down, it hadn’t taken long for you to piece together why a young man would be rushing to get out of your apartment while your attractive (albeit, socially dead) roommate was home alone. When she met your prying eyes, you shot her a pointed glare. “Cradle rocker.”

She threatened to turn the showerhead on you, but relented as soon as you flinched away. “He’s in one of my classes,” she muttered, then pushed herself to her feet with a soft groan. “We’re out of milk,” she said, shaking the empty carton. “Let his eyes air-dry. I’ll be in my office – come get me if he starts crying again.”

“I’m a doctor too, y’know.”

“You’ll be a doctor in another year. Right now, you’re an intern.” She eyed Yuuji wearily. “An intern who physically assaults her patients, at that.”

Without any real way to retort, you stuck your tongue out – a gesture Shoko mimicked as she slipped out of the crime scene that was your bathroom. Despite Shoko’s advice, you fished a towel off the nearest rack and handed it to Yuuji, who accepted it with a grateful hum. “I really am sorry,” you repeated, burying your face in your hands. “It’s just, it’s been so long, and you look so different, and god, it’s been—”

“—ten years,” Yuuji filled in, probably tired of hearing you repeat the same two excuses. “I remember, ‘cuz you invited us to your graduation that year. I wanted to go, too, but Gramps got sick and…” He trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck with an airy chuckle. “You know how it is.”

“Oh my god,” you gasped. “I loved your grandfather. How is he?”

Yuuji’s smile wavered for the first time. “He passed, actually. A few years ago.”

Fuck.

If the building was going to collapse and bury you in the rubble, that would’ve been the time.

“Sukuna’s doing good, though,” Yuuji went on, kind enough to pretend there hadn’t been a lapse. “He opened a restaurant a few months ago. It’s a hole-in-the-wall kind of place, but it’s been keeping him out of the ring.” His expression brightened. “And you’re a doctor! I mean, I knew you would be, but you’re a doctor!”

You felt your face heat up his brother’s name, your eyes falling to the tiled floor. “Almost a doctor. I just started my internship.” And they’d already managed to work you half to death. “You’re in med school, right? Shoko never teaches undergrad.”

“It’s my first semester,” he said with a slight laugh. “It’s harder than I thought it’d be, though. Miss Shoko offered to give me a few pointers, but, y’know—” He sighed, let his head lull back. “I’m starting to think I’m just not smart enough for stuff like this.”

“You shouldn’t say that kind of thing about yourself. You’ve always been—” You cut yourself off with a sudden gasp, clapping your hands together. “If you’re struggling, let me help you study! I have tomorrow off, and I promise, I’m not as strict as Shoko.”

Immediately, he straightened up, your towel still strung around his neck and his smile returned to its full brightness. It only dimmed slightly when he glanced down at his damp shirt. “…there won’t be as much pepper spray this time, right?”

His smile was as contagious as it’d been when he was still a kid, begging you to let him stay up yet another hour past his already-lenient bedtime. Despite his bloodshot eyes and your lingering, only slightly lessened guilt, you found yourself biting back a grin.

“No pepper spray, this time. I promise.”

“Room for one more?”

She glanced over her shoulder as you struggled past the jammed sliding door, taking a moment to evaluate your stiff shoulders and strained smile over the thick frames of her glasses before nodding curtly. Your relief was immediate and all-encompassing. Honestly, you should’ve known better than to do anything but shake your head and flee the country when Yuuji invited you to hang out with a few of his friends, but he’d sworn up and down that it wasn’t a party and promised that you wouldn’t be out of place and pouted in a way you’d never been able to resist. You were starting to think that, no matter how old you got, you’d never learn to say ‘no’ to Yuuji.

The blaring music was only vaguely muffled by the glass, the blurry outlines of other guests playing behind thin curtains. There was a red solo cup in your hand, a lipstick stain on your cheek from a girl who’d passed out half an hour ago, but you were hyper-aware that you were too old to be at a college party with people at least half a decade younger than you, in the best cases. You braced yourself against the balcony railing with a soft groan, crossing your arms and hanging your head low enough to warrant a hum of sympathy from the woman next to you. She held up a box of cigarettes – the cheap kind you and Shoko used to split on the days you had to decide between food and rent – and you accepted her offer with the kind of gratitude you could only assume a starving lion would’ve shown to a limping gazelle.

“Maki,” she said, shaking one into your open palm and fishing a lighter out of her pocket. “You’re one of Itadori’s friends?”

“You could say that.” You let her light you up before taking a shaky drag, the bitter taste a welcome distraction. “I’ve been tutoring him for a few weeks. I think he just invited me as a way to say ‘thank you’.”

Her eyes flashed with recognition, the corner of his lips turning upward for the first time. “You’re the chick who used to babysit him. (Y/n), right?”

“He’s mentioned me?”

“He won’t shut up about you. Every other word out of his mouth is ‘(Y/n) this’ or ‘(Y//n) that’.” She tapped her cigarette against the edge of the railing, sending a few flakes of ash fluttering down to the street below. “Megumi gets it the worst, but we’ve all had to see the fucking pictures.”

“That… that sounds like him.” You forced out a half-hearted laugh, then wavered. “I’m sorry, pictures?”

Maki opened her mouth, but the balcony door was jerked open before she could respond. Yuji appeared in the open entryway, cheeks flushed and grin wide. He drawled your name in a single slur before moving on to more important topics. “We found a—We found a karaoke machine! ‘gumi thinks he can get it running!”

You sent Maki an apologetic look, but she only shrugged, a sliver of a grin. “Better get him tucked in.”

This time, when you smiled back, it didn’t quite reach your eyes.

It took a month for Yuuji to start ‘forgetting’ his textbooks when he came over for your little study sessions.

It took three for Yuuji to drop the pretense of studying at all – calling you out to some late-night diner or lethargic early-morning café or, better yet, showing up at your apartment door unannounced and empty-handed with only that unnerving smile and a half-baked excuse to spend time with you.

It took six for his hand to drift just a little lower than your shoulder while you watched some awful, b-rated horror movie on your well-beaten couch. You let him reach your waist before clearing your throat and shifting away, your smile pained.

“I… I think you should probably leave,” you half-mumbled, your voice shaking. “It’s getting late.”

“We haven’t even gotten to the best part yet.” Predictably, Yuuji was undeterred. His persistence used to be endearing, but now, it just felt unfair. “I don’t mind sleeping over, if that’s what you’re worried about. It’s not like we’ve never spent the night together.”

A nervous laugh, his hand planted just a little too close to your thigh. “I wish you wouldn’t phrase it like—”

“I mean, I know I’m your type.” It was almost impressive, what he could say with such an innocent expression. His free hand found its way to your other side, pinning you between the arm of the couch and his broad chest. “I know you had a thing for Sukuna, and everyone says we’re practically identical. That means you should be into me too, right?”

“Yuuji,” Your eyes darted to your phone, left absent-mindedly on your coffee table. The urge was there, but it wasn’t like he would actually hurt you. He’d always been a sweet kid – a little overzealous, but that wasn’t a crime. This was just… a bad decision, one you had to stop him from making before he did something he’d regret. “Sukuna is my age, and—”

“I don’t care about that.” He cut in swiftly, definitively. His bright eyes had glazed over, catching the dim light of your T.V. as he leaned in further, as his face came to hover less than a full breath away from yours. “I’ve loved you since I was eight. Can Sukuna say that?”

“That’s not—”

“I know you used to fuck him.” His chest was touching yours, now, his breath hot against your skin. “I know you’d fuck him again, if he was here. I know—”

You didn’t give him a chance to finish. It was a weak blow, simultaneously hesitant and instinctual, but your open palm made contact with his cheek with a deafening crack, his head snapping to the side and putting that much more distance between his body and yours. He moved to cup his swelling cheek, and you took the opportunity to slip out from underneath him and stumble to your feet. “I think you should leave,” you repeated, the words spat hastily enough to blend together. “Please, Yuuji.”

For a second, he didn’t move, didn’t speak.

Then, he turned to face you, his smile wiped away and his expression so blank, you couldn’t remember how you’d ever looked at him and saw anything other than void.

He didn’t say anything, only pushing himself to his feet and shambling out of your living room. You kept your eyes on the ground until his footsteps faded out of earshot, until you heard the front door creak open and slam shut with enough force to shake the walls.

When you were sure he was gone, you collapsed onto your couch and laid motionless while an actress screamed in the background.

“Your golden boy’s asking about you, again.”

You groaned, buckling at the waist and burying your face in your arms. Shoko glanced up from the exams she was grading, but whatever sympathy she might’ve felt apparently didn’t warrant the effort it would’ve taken to reach across the table to comfort you. “Satoru’s been getting it, too,” she went on. “That’s how you know it’s bad. I can’t remember the last time someone managed to talk over that narcissist.”

“I’m sorry.” You couldn’t remember how many times you’d already apologized for Yuuji’s recent fixation. “He’s… probably just worried about his grades, or something.”

Her lips quirked into a frown. “What are you talking about?”

“I was helping him study,” you admitted, reluctantly. As much as Shoko had to hear about your unruly patients and patronizing coworkers, you’d been less open about how much time you were spending with a student fresh out of undergrad. “He’s never been that good with school. I used to have to help him with his homework in elementary school, too.”

This time, she decided your conversation was important enough to earn her full attention. “Itadori’s one of my best students.”

You felt your chest tighten. “But, the first time he came over, you were tutoring—”

She said your name, curt and blunt, and you went quiet. With a sigh, she shook her head, dropping her pen entirely. “When was the last time I offered to personally tutor a struggling student?”

You swallowed dryly. “Never.”

“And when was the last time I gave our full address out to literally anyone?”

“Never,” you said, again. After a second, you added, “Well, there was that one time with Iori…”

“Not the point. I know you don’t want to hear it, but the kid’s a creep. You might have to—”

She was cut off by your phone buzzing against the table. Your eyes scanned over the caller’s name scrawled across the dim screen before moving back to Shoko, her gaze now narrowed into a sharp glare. “Don’t.”

And, for a second, you didn’t. You convinced yourself that you wouldn’t. You told yourself that, after you bought Satoru around of drinks as an apology, you’d do… you’d do something about Yuuji, even if you weren’t sure what you could do, just yet.

Then, you let yourself picture the kid you used to watch for a few dollars an hour while his grandfather was sick and his brother was on the other side of town doing something dubiously legal at best, dead in a ditch at worst – all wide eyes and scuffed elbows and lopsided grins. You let yourself remember the way he’d ramble about his day after you picked him up from school, and how excited he was the first time you made it to one of his school’s sports days, and how he’d clung to you and sobbed the day before his family moved to the other side of the country. At the time, you’d been thankful to have one less responsibility, relieved that you’d never have to see Sukuna again. You’d been selfish, even for a kid.

The phone was in your hand in a moment, the call answered in another. You stood as you brought it to your ear, hoping that would be enough to block out Shoko’s mumbled cursing.

“Yuuji?”

The silence in your car was thick, nearly suffocating.

It’d been one of Yuuji’s friends calling from his phone – the dark-haired one with the monotone voice, barely audible over the blaring music of whichever nightclub they were standing outside of. He’d asked you to, in his own words, ‘come get your problem child’, and when you’d asked why Yuuji needed you specifically, he’d only handed the phone back to Yuuji and let you listen to a full minute of whining, your name the only coherent thing to make it off of Yuuji’s tongue. Shoko urged you not to go, and yet, twenty minutes later, Yuuji was slumped over in your passenger seat, his eyes narrowed and his lips pursed in an uncharacteristic frown.

He was less talkative than he’d been on the phone. The clingier stages of his inebriation had passed, leaving room for a disassociated sort of passiveness that meant, even if you’d been brave enough to try and start a conversation, his response wouldn’t be anything worth that kind of effort. By the time you reached his apartment complex, the knot sitting at the pit of your stomach was equal parts dread and second-hand embarrassment, but you tried to keep your tone light as you turned to him. “It’s time to get out, Yuuji.” And then, when he failed to move, “You’re on your own from here.”

He looked at you, eyes unfocused and hands folded almost childishly over his lap. You softened more than you should’ve at the sight. “…do you need help getting home?”

A second of thought, a quick nod. You shouldn’t. You knew that you really, really shouldn’t.

And yet, somehow, you found yourself in front of Yuuji’s door, fussing over the lock as Yuuji clung to your side, his face buried in the dip of your shoulder. He was cooperative enough; able to stand on his own with minimum swaying but not so lucid that it took more than a gentle suggestion to lead him to his bedroom, where he was more than happy to collapse onto his unmade bed. With a shaky exhale, you turned to leave, but something caught on your sleeve – Yuuji’s hand, when you could bring yourself to check.

“Stay,” he mumbled, his voice dampened by the sheets his face was buried in. “Please?”

You felt your throat go dry. “I can’t.”

You expected him to go shrill and whiny, but he proved to be a touch more mature than the ten-year-old you used to babysit. Rather flatly, he asked, “Why not?”

How were you supposed to answer that? Would it be good enough to say that you didn’t want to, that you couldn’t spend your night looking after a drunk kid you’d known a decade ago, that you’d already done more than you should’ve just by giving him a ride? Was it worth trying to talk to him at all when he could barely hold his head up? Would it do anything to soften the burn of the bile rising into your throat to point out that, the last time you’d been in the same room as him, he’d tried to—

No, it wasn’t and it wouldn’t and you had to leave. With your heart racing in your chest, you tried to jerk yourself out of his hold, but his vice-grip only grew tighter, his head rising up from the mattress just enough to let him stare at you with those big, bleary eyes. “Why not?”

“Yuuji, this isn’t—”

He was so, so much stronger than he had been, the last time you’d seen each other. One second, you were on your feet, at his bedside, and the next, you were on the floor of his bedroom, forced onto your hands and knees while Yuuji’s body pressed into yours from above. “I love you,” he said, his voice as steady as it’d ever been. “I love you, and I—Fuck—” He panted against the back of your neck, something uncomfortably stiff grinding against your ass. “It makes me so fucking hard when you say my name like that.”

A hand slipped under the hem of your top, his palm pressing into the small of your back. You moved to speak, then thought better of it, biting into your bottom lip as your anxious squirming turned to full-blown struggling. Yuuji only laughed, the noise airy and affectionate, winding an arm around your waist and pulling you that much closer to him – making it that much more impossible to get away. His free hand worked clumsily at your top; drawing it up and over your head. You fought against it at first, but froze the first time you felt something stretch a little too far, heard fabric tear. This couldn’t happen, but you absolutely couldn’t be stranded in Yuuji’s apartment with no clothes and no way out.

With his face buried in the back of your shoulder, he cupped your chest, catching your nipples between his forefinger and thumb and pinching with just enough force to draw a low, strained whimper from the back of your throat. “So cute…” He nuzzled deeper into your neck as his touch drifted. Your skirt was drawn downward – a long piece, something you’d thrown on without much thought – then discarded completely, his own shirt wrestled off in the same motion. You felt his fingertips slip under the hem of your panties, but he pulled away and straightened his back, instead. For a second, you let yourself believe that he’d come to his senses, that whatever sick idea he’d gotten into his head had finally worn off, but the arm wrapped around your waist only drew tighter, hauling you off of the floor and into his arms. You were dropped unceremoniously onto the edge of his bed, and Yuuji sunk onto his knees between your open legs.

“I know you’ve probably slept with other people – aside from my brother, I mean. It’d be nice to find out you haven’t, though.” His tone was distant and dreamy. He was still drunk, but not drunk enough for how he’d been acting earlier. Not drunk enough for what he was doing now. He traced the pad of his thumb over your clothed slit, keeping a hand curled around your ankle to keep you in place. “I used to hear you with Sukuna – in his car, and his room, on the couch after you two thought I’d fallen asleep …” He trailed off into an airy laugh. “He likes to show off – always has. If he wasn’t my brother, I think I’d kill him.”

He sighed, pressing a lingering kiss into the inside of your thigh before shifting his attention to your pussy; his tongue laving over the thin material covering your cunt. You were crying, now, openly and audibly – your choked sobs almost loud enough to block out Yuuji’s quiet groans and pleased grunts. However his obsession might’ve made him think he felt about you, your distress didn’t seem to affect his appetite. Your panties were pulled down your legs and slid into some unseen pocket. With the last barrier between you and him gone, he was free to trace his tongue over your slit, to latch onto your clit and suck in a way that made you want to bury your face in your hands and scream. You tried to – crossing your arms over your face, but any sound you tried to make was quickly strangled into a broken moans as his tongue fucked shallowly into your pussy. It was invasive, disgusting, but your body didn’t care. You felt cunt clench around him as his nose ground into your clit, his need for air irrelevant while he spread you open with his tongue. Your thighs clenched shut, attempting to block him out, but his only response was a reverberating groan – and hand on your thigh encouraging you to squeeze him that much tighter.

You couldn’t tell which you hated more; the unwanted stimulation or the fact that your body was reacting to it, heating up where you needed it to go cold. As he sunk further into you, ate you out like a beast starved, you clenched your eyes and willed yourself to go numb, to ignore the sloppy sound of your slick on Yuuji’s lips. It was useless, though, as futile as trying to ignore him in the first place. Your back arched off the bed, legs twitching where they hung limply over his shoulders, and—

—and Yuuji pulled away with a sharp gasp. He was on top of you before you could process that he was moving, his mouth crashing into yours before you could think to avoid him. The kiss was brutal, rushed; all teeth and tongue and lips shoved against yours with enough force to bruise. The only hint of tenderness was the soft, satisfied noise he let out as his tongue raked across yours, the bright grin painted across his lips when he drew back from you. “It’s alright.” He brought a hand to your cheek, cupping your face and brushing away tears with his thumb. “I’ve slept with other people too, ‘cause I knew I’d need a little practice to catch up with you. Could never go all the way, though. I just thought about you, and…” He blushed, simpered, like he thought he could pass himself off as the shy, lip-biting schoolboy with your slick coating his chin. “I guess I just didn’t really want anyone else to touch me. Not when I knew I’d see you again.”

A horrified sob bubbled up from somewhere deep and primal in your chest. Yuuji didn’t seem to hear it, only sighing as he pressed a lingering kiss into your forehead. “You don’t have to do anything,” he muttered, his hands falling to your waist. “I want to take care of you, tonight.”

You watched in stunned, paralyzed horror as he pushed himself to his feet, as he hastily worked off his jeans, his boxers (the dark material already notably stained with proof of his arousal). You made one more feeble attempt to squirm out from underneath him, to get away before his attention turned back to you, but confused and betrayed and so, so exhausted, you didn’t stand much of a chance against Yuuji. All he had to do was glance your way, his expression as warm as it was soulless, to leave you helpless against him.

He was eager enough not to reposition you, not to draw this out with the pretense of romance. With one hand on your hip and the other planted near your head, he lined the head of his cock up with your entrance and forced himself into you, bottoming out in a single thrust.

It was agony – pure and unrelenting. Any semblance of gentleness, of restraint fell away as soon as Yuuji was inside of you, as soon as your hyper-sensitive cunt clamped down around his cock. He cursed under his breath before collapsing, his chest pressing into yours as he tried to bury himself that much deeper inside of you, to chase the feeling of your pussy milking him for all he was worth. As hard as you tried not to think about Sukuna, Yuuji hadn’t been lying when he said they were alike. He was just as insatiable as his brother had been any time you let him but his hands on you; just as rough in the way his hips ground into yours between sporadic thrusts. There’d been bruises, the next day. At least Sukuna had been the type to make sure he was gone by the time the damage set in. You doubted Yuuji would be so kind.

“I—I’m sorry,” he managed as he buckled into you. Panting against the dip of your shoulder, he took your hips in his hands and dragged your ass of the mattress, his brutal pace stuttering as he found a new angle to abuse. “Next time—I’ll be gentle next time, I just need to—”

His cock hit something soft and sensitive inside of you. Reflexively, your hands shot to his back, your nails finding skin and tearing. The moan Yuuji let out in response was nothing short of sinful; hitched and guttural, ragged and loud enough to block out the wet, slick sound of his cock pumping into your cunt. “M—” His hand wraps around your thigh, catching you under the knee and dragging it towards your chest, letting him fuck into you that much deeper, that much faster. His face never left the crook of your neck, as if he was afraid to give you space to breathe. “Mommy, ‘m sorry, I need to—”

His teeth sunk into your throat as something hot and thick flooded into your cunt, as your body went stiff and your vision burned white. While his climax was sudden, intense, the peak to a decade’s worth of patience, yours had to be dragged out of you despite your attempts to hold it back, to deny yourself pleasure in the vain hope that it’d somehow be able to convince Yuuji to stop what he’d already finished. It seemed to hold you there in that state of dark, distorted euphoria for minutes – Yuuji’s movements turning slow and languid as he nursed you through your orgasm.

Eventually, mercifully, he went still, going limp above you with his canines still planted in the curve of your neck. If there was any pain, any other unwanted burdens he could force onto you, you were too lost in your own despair to notice, too distant to feel anything other than the mildest tinge of dread as he pulled back, raising his head just far enough to stare down at you, adoration heavy in his eyes and his grin wide and love-struck.

A small, naïve part of you found the sight suffocatingly familiar, while the rest could almost convince itself that you were looking at a stranger.

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miasmultifandomdump · 1 year ago

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It annoys me how so much of modern discourse around female characters is, to be frank, misogyny repackaged as being progressive.

If a woman's strengths and interests are associated with being feminine, such as cooking or enjoying nice clothes or being kind and compassionate, the entire fandom jumps on her as stereotypical or weak. It's seen as cool to bash on "women's work", never mind that your average misogynist has been doing it for decades, hell, centuries, and the jobs that are mocked as women's work are actually pretty essential to humans surviving and thriving.

And then, of course, if a woman shows the slightest hint of nonconformity, the entire fandom jumps on her because "oh!! she's trying to be not like other girls!! she wants male attention so bad!!" It doesn't matter how she is to the other girls in her life, if she wears combat boots and listens to punk instead of Taylor Swift, she clearly hates every other woman ever according to certain parts of fandom. It couldn't be that she's neurodivergent or LGBT or hell, even just a tomboy, she has to hate every other girl on the planet. /sarcasm

AND JUST TO CLARIFY. These tropes can genuinely be negatively done. The traditionally feminine girl can be a weak character and the tomboy girl can be an ass. But when you're calling a girl a "pick me" just because she doesn't live up to your idea of what a woman should look like or what you think feminism is... congratulations. You've simply repackaged sexism and called it woke. And lots of girls who see this crap online are going to suffer for it but hey, it was never actually about them, so who cares, right? /sarcasm

Anyway, to all the girls reading this post, you go ahead and be who you want. Be a princess or a president or a pop singer or a punk rocker or hell, all of the above. You're not a "pick me" you're not a "handmaiden" you're not trying too hard to be "not like other girls". You are fine. Don't let pseudo-woke nonsense get to you. It's just white noise.

#and to all of you guys who are maybe younger just know. youll learn to drown it out #you might still roll your eyes and if you have anxiety like me you might still have bad days but. it gets better #you are worth so much more than worrying about people who refuse to give you good faith and their stupid judgements of you #fandom critique #feminism #female characters #strong female characters #pick me girl #pick me #handmaiden #nlog #not like other girls #all queued up with nowhere to go

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butchjess · 8 months ago

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the jess mariano s2 outfits post.. all of his outfits for every one of his appearances including accessories and other such things found to the best of my abilities . full thing is under the read more

-repeat outfits are not included for my own sanity

*asteriks are to indicate the piece is not an exact match, but very close (couldn't find it or just not 100% sure)

S2E05 Nick & Nora/Sid & Nancy

The Camo Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch, black with stainless steel casing + grey braided string bracelet + dark brown leather belt with Civil War union soldier oval buckle

L.L. Bean navy blue puffer vest + Rothco long-sleeve Woodland camo shirt

Levi's 568 dark wash jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

Zip-Up Sweatshirt Fit

Nixon “The Rocker” A370 watch

Gray zip-up sweatshirt with US army staff sergeant rank insignia patch + Indera Mills navy blue raschel-knit thermal shirt

Levi’s 501 straight leg jeans*

Swiss modern combat boots

Wet Delinquent Fit

Nixon “The Rocker” A370 watch + gray braided string bracelet

Stanfield's charcoal long-sleeve thermal waffle knit shirt

Dickies loose fit jeans (logo painted over from back pocket)

Swiss modern combat boots

The Girl From Mars Fit

Nixon “The Rocker A370 watch + gray braided string bracelet

Gray zip-up sweatshirt with US army staff sergeant rank insignia patch + L.L. Bean navy blue puffer vest + white long-sleeved Fresno, CA motorcycle sweater*

Levi's 501 dark blue straight leg fit jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

S2E06 Presenting Lorelai Gilmore

Metallica Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + gray braided string bracelet

Pushead Metallica No Leaf Clover shirt

The Uniform Fit

Luke's season one baseball cap + Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + gray braided string bracelet

Burgundy plaid flannel + gray t-shirt

Dickies loose fit jeans

S2E08 The Ins and Outs of Inns

Child Labor Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + gray bracelet

Hanes black pocket t-shirt* + Rothco long-sleeve Woodland camo shirt

Levi's 568 dark wash jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

The Slacker Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch

L.L. Bean navy blue puffer vest + Tasman Empire Airways ltd. vintage red t-shirt + Stanfield's charcoal long-sleeve thermal waffle knit shirt

Levi's 501 straight leg fit jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

Double Denim Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch

L.L. Bean Sherpa-lined Trucker style denim jacket + Stanfield's charcoal long-sleeve thermal waffle knit shirt

Wrangler black regular fit jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

The Toaster Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet

Green long-sleeve California graphic shirt + Stanfield's white thermal long-sleeve waffle knit shirt

Levi's 501 straight leg fit jeans

S2E10 The Bracebridge Dinner

Don't Need Your Help Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet + dark brown leather belt with Civil War union soldier oval buckle

Punk Planet magazine red t-shirt + Stanfield's white thermal long-sleeve waffle knit shirt

Wrangler black regular fit jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

The Carriage Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet

Beige Sherpa-lined suede coat + black plaid button up + black undershirt

Levi's 568 dark wash jeans*

Swiss modern combat boots

The Glance Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet

Black fatigue shirt*

Dickies loose fit jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

S2E12 Richard in Stars Hollow

Innocent Boy Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + dark brown leather belt with oval Civil War union soldier buckle

L.L. Bean Sherpa-lined Trucker style denim jacket + Rothco long-sleeve Woodland camo shirt

Wrangler black regular fit jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

S2E13 A-Tisket, A-Tasket

Superglue Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch

Beige Sherpa-lined suede coat* + Tasmanian Empire Airways ltd. red t-shirt + Stanfield's charcoal long-sleeve thermal waffle-knit shirt

Brown loose fit corduroy pants

The Guy Who Brought Enough Money Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch

Beige Sherpa-lined suede coat + green long-sleeve Califronia graphic shirt + Stanfield's white long-sleeve waffle-knit thermal + black long-sleeve shirt

Wrangler black regular fit jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

The Phone Call Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet

Dickies long-sleeve garage blue industrial work shirt with embroidered US flag patch (name-tag included) + black long-sleeve shirt*

Brown loose fit corduroy pants*

White socks

S2E15 Lost and Found

The Gutter Cleaner Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet + gardening gloves

Wrangler gas station jacket (no nametag)* + Punk Planet magazine red t-shirt + black long-sleeve shirt

Wrangler black regular fit jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

S2E13 There's the Rub

Construction Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet + blue pen + blue hardhat + dark brown leather belt with oval Civil War union soldier buckle

Hanes gray pocket t-shirt + black long-sleeve shirt

Wrangler black regular fit jeans

Delivery Boy Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet

L.L. Bean Sherpa lined Trucker style denim jacket + Dickies long-sleeve garage blue industrial work shirt with U.S. flag patch embroidered on sleeve (name-tag removed) + Hanes black pocket t-shirt*

Brown loose fit corduroy pants

Swiss modern combat boots

Navy Blue Sweatshirt Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet

Ralph Lauren Polo Sport navy blue USA fleece sweatshirt (02 embroidered on sleeve)* + Stanfield's white long-sleeve waffle knit thermal shirt

S2E17 Dead Uncles and Vegetables

Despot Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet

L.L. Bean navy blue puffer vest + Nordstrom brown button down dress shirt + black t-shirt

Levi's 568 dark wash jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

Diner Boy Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet + blue pen + dark brown leather belt with oval Civil War union soldier buckle

Hanes gray pocket t-shirt + Stanfield's white long-sleeve waffle knit thermal shirt

Dickies loose fit jeans (logo painted over/removed)

Funeral Party Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet

Black fatigue shirt + white and black baseball tee*

S2E19 Teach Me Tonight

Ice Cream Cones Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch + leather bracelet

Big Smith green diamond quilted jacket + white striped double pocket linen shirt + black t-shirt + Stanfield's white long-sleeve waffle knit thermal shirt

RVCA Americana olive green baggy fit jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

S2E21 Lorelai's Graduation Day

Payphone Fit

Dickies navy blue Eisenhower jacket + gray button-up*

Levi's 568 dark wash jeans

New York Fit

Nixon "The Rocker" A370 watch

Dickies navy blue Eisenhower jacket + Hardkore Kidd 2002 No Mercy tour shirt

RVCA Americana olive green baggy fit jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

S2E22 Can't Get Started

The Kiss Fit

Dickies navy blue Eisenhower jacket + gray graphic t-shirt* + Stanfield's black long-sleeve waffle knit thermal shirt

Levi's 568 dark wash jeans

Swiss modern combat boots

#jess mariano #gilmore girls #literati #rory x jess #:3 #doing this by season because of the image limit etc etc #some of the screenshots range from 720p to 1080p sorry -_-#any suggestions/corrections are welcomed if you have them

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caligvlasaqvarivm · 3 months ago

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Can I ask for your reasoning behind the Jake and Vriska pairing? This isn't out of hate or anything i am just very curious

3/4 of the alpha kids are IMMEDIATELY introduced with "btw, here's the dead troll you're supposed to date".

Your name is ROXY. God DAMN do you love WIZARDS. (Editor's Note: also Princes. A Prince who is also a wizard? Holy shit.)

So he made a couple of coy recommendations for objects of your attraction, and you have hung his COBALT BEEFCAKES here since. He was pretty spot on with the blue Funke, to be honest, since that's like the best show ever. Mr. Cross can blue himself any time, as far as you are concerned. [...] There is also your magnificent SWANSON. Ron Swanson is the PERFECT MAN.

And Jake's is the most blatant, in my opinion:

But who needs chums, when you can enjoy a top notch gander of your GALS OF CERULEAN COMPLEXION, HUBBA HUBBA. You are oft-times the recipient of a good ribbing from Jane on account of your peculiar fascination with blue movie ladies. You don't have to justify yourself to her though. What is even her deal? Any fella would be off his ROCKER not to fawn over all these BODACIOUS BLUE KNOCKOUTS. You want to make out with all of them. Dear, sweet Neytiri from James Cameron's Avatar. Oh, if only you were the one who could have overcome his paralysis on an alien adventure planet to become her boyfriend, instead of that other guy. Then she could have shown you how to be bold and courageous, and stand up to fight for your people, and maybe later, engage in a bizarre extraterrestrial reproductive process involving ponytails, and a magical tree you guess?

So for those keeping score, Roxy and Eridan, Jane and Equius (moment of silence), and Jake and Vriska. It's further proven by how stunningly hot he finds Aranea, who is a dead ringer for Vriska, and further supported by the fact that Jake is very much Vriska's type - she has a weird red, vascillatory thing for Tavros, and briefly dates John. Tavros is a Page, and John shares many genetic personality similarities with Jake, his ecto-grandpa. Honestly, if I were to distill down Vriska's taste in guys into one single person, it would just be Jake.

And yeah, I know that he and Vriska basically have nothing going on between them post-retcon, but I only consider everything after Game Over to be soft canon anyway, since by that point it's clear that Hussie has no intention of finishing Homestuck the way it was originally intended to end (there are way too many dangling plot threads, many of the choices - especially revolving around Vriska - seem genuinely aimed to make as much of the fandom upset as possible, and the tone and themes swerve wildly from their original trajectories in a way that feels rushed and incongruous). Pre-Retcon, the comic is gunning HARD for red Vriska/Jake endgame, and I put more weight on that than post-retcon's weird personality-regressed Vriska.

So I am specifically talking about post-character-development Vriska and Jake - Vriska who's had her feelings jams with John, proper apology and reconciliation with Aradia, Sollux, and Tavros, and is in a stable moirallegiance - Vriska who no longer feels the need to be such a massive bitch all the time and isn't trying to solo the game and steal the spotlight. Vriska at her best would probably be really healthy for him - Jake clearly enjoys a challenge much more than Tavros (though not enough to work well with Dirk), and Vriska clearly has a thing for goofy little failboys. It's not gay but not everything can be a W for us fujos, sadly.

#homestuck #jake english #vriska serket #standard reminder of you dont need to ship what i ship #and i also dont care what you ship. be free and wild and ship whatever you want #this is just a canon discussion blog and the canon has stuff to say about vriska and jake in the red quad #idk it's literally not serious lmao

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bluebobatea · 8 months ago

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if sasuke was the main character then he probably would've been a LOT more sympathised with than he is now (which is to say rarely). like the narrative wouldn't even need to change to show his pains or 'his side of the story', bc it does that plenty. it's just that he is not the main character. and idk what it is about our human minds but we tend to sympathise with main characters automatically (unless ofc you go off the rockers insane and do something like obliterate almost everyone from the planet *cough* eren yeager *cough*)

an instance that comes to my mind where this does happen is with lelouch from code geass. while i don't agree with his character motivations, people generally do sympathise with him as he is the mc and as viewers we know he isn't inherently evil. sasuke's goal towards the end is slightly similar but ofc people love to hate him so they don't even try to understand where he is coming from.

my point is, most people while engaging with the naruto story don't read between the lines and so don't see how traumatised and in pain sasuke is and hence don't understand his character motivations. heck, they don't understand a single bit about him and so they automatically hate him, as he is supposedly going against the main character's goals.

which is really sad given all that he has been through.

#there are bajillion other reasons people hate him for #honestly i have lost track of the stupid reasons i have seen people give for hating him #and sometimes they just do without any reason *not even exaggerating* unfortunately #im like yeah go on hate him. you guys obv don't have enough brain cells to comprehend his character #they never understood him. and it's not like any kind of reasoning is gonna make them change their minds #and it's not like one needs to do a deep character analysis to understand him. it's literally right there.#all you have to do is stop worshipping konoha and its militaristic policies and the people who enact said policies.#and also the people who enforce those policies while subtly hating them but can't do anything bc it's dictatorship :)#but maybe that's too much to ask of them bc that would mean they would need to question their political views #and we can't have that right bc it's all just fiction in the end right? and fiction exists in a void :) (yes I'm being sarcastic jc)#like the amt of times i have heard people say “you don't need to take this so seriously it's just fiction”#umm you do know that fiction is inspired by real life events right???#tldr: most people throw away their brains while engaging with nart media and have zero reading comprehension skills #this turned into yet another rant T T why am i like this AAAAAAAAAAA #sasuke #uchiha sasuke #sasuke uchiha #pro sasuke #pro uchiha #anti konoha

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lovelyllamasblog · 8 months ago

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Eris ⚛️

Character Description

“Eris is the drummer for PLUTO AND THE DWARF PLANETS!!! Originally UB313, she is named for the greek goddess of chaos, she’s takes her charge quite seriously. Stay out of her way!!!”

(taken from Galaxy Girls wikia)

Loud and proud, Eris loves hard rock, especially banging on her drum set. Her hot-headed, ferocious, and tough personality may make her intimidating at times, but that’s how she is.

#my posts #art #aesthetic #moodboard #eris #galaxy girls #milky way and the galaxy girls #atomic #rebel #rocker #rock music #punk #punk music #punk rock #hardcore punk #dwarf planet #pluto and the dwarf planets

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thislovintime · 16 days ago

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“I’m no authority on Buddhism. Nor Christianity, for that matter. But my understanding of Jesus’ message is that forgiveness—understanding that the next person is a fellow struggler in his/her path just like me, and that none of us can judge the next one—is critical to our well-being. Personally I believe that that message, whether you’re a Christian or not, is an absolutely necessary understanding for keeping the planet from going up in atomic vaporization or dying of heat stroke and carbon dioxide poisoning. What I understand the Buddha to have indicated includes the realization that all things are a living, pulsing part of this world, rocks and rockers both. That tells me that my job is to fit into this world with the least disruption possible. I guess that Buddhism isn’t as specific on the question as Christianity is, but I believe that implicit in the two philosophies is the understanding that to not forgive is to make my own life the more difficult, never mind how much more trouble I cause in the outside world if I think I have a right to seek vengeance, or even to harbor a grudge.” - Peter Tork, Ask Peter Tork

“A good attitude generates more comfort. When people say, ‘Why me?’ and How could this happen?’ or ‘Somebody must be made to pay for my problems,’ that attitude is a low-skill approach. It’s not very contentment-making.” - Peter Tork, Toledo Blade, November 2009

#Peter Tork #Tork quotes #00s Tork #10s Tork #long read #more for the solid Tork advice files #screenshots #can you queue it

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melded-galaxy · 6 months ago

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Ultimis Richtofen: Throughout the years

Part 3 of 3: The peak of insanity and the fall from power

Tranzit: Takes place on 21st October 2035 in Hanford, Washington, U.S.A. Richtofen took over the MPD in 2025, meaning this is the 10th year since the Earth became an irradiated, lava and zombie-infested wasteland.

I think it's safe to say Richtofen is more off his rocker than ever, having reigned over the zombies and being connected to the Aether for a decade. He's incredibly zany, raunchy and childish, has uncontrollable mood swings, his emotions flipping from absolute rage to joy at a moment's notice. His attitude towards Stuhlinger ranges from trying to be somewhat supportive and friendly to sexually harassing him to savagely insulting and threatening him, depending on the map and how well Samuel is following his instructions.

Over the years, both Richtofen and Maxis found ways to contact the surviving humans, both men vying for the surviving humans' loyalty for their own goals. Battles were fought on behalf of the two scientists between differing groups of survivors.

Richtofen often pitted the remaining members of both the CDC and CIA against each other for his own amusement. Seen in the 8-player BO2 Zombies Grief mode on maps Town, Farm and Borough.

George Barkley, former assistant director of the CDC, reports that Element 115 has seemingly spread across the globe, similar to an air-born virus, with infected survivors listing 'short-term memory loss, psychosis, delusion, and paranoia' as side effects. Tellingly, Richtofen suffers from all of these.

It quickly becomes apparent that Richtofen can only communicate with any human that has eaten zombie flesh. Stuhlinger, a member of Victis, and a previous member of a cult named The Flesh, is the only one in the group that can hear Richtofen. The rest of the team is in contact with Maxis. Despite Stuhlinger's pleas, Victis ultimately sides with Maxis.

Similar to at the end of Moon's easter egg, as Richtofen is in control of the zombies he is once again the demonic announcer.

Richtofen is unamused by Victis and is starting to miss his old teammates, especially Nikolai. 'Gah, you guys are boring!' 'Blah blah blah vodka vodka blah blah. *sighs* I think I'm starting to miss that drunk...' 'You know, I think I'm starting to miss the other three...'

Despite being unimpressed with Victis, Richtofen does enjoy trolling them. 'Oh look, you got the Wunderwaffe DG2... JUST KIDDING!' 'It looks like a Max Ammo but I can't be sure... I can only see EVERYTHING at the same time.' 'You know, I never like how that little brat never told us how anything worked, so the secret to survive is *gibberish* ... AND THAT'S HOW YOU WIN!'

Tells Stuhlinger that he wants to heal the Earth, though also admits only so he can use the survivors as playthings. Also mentions to Stu that Maxis will kill all surviving humans... he's right. 'Soon, this beautiful planet will be healed once more and the flesh will cover the Earth!' 'You will be the heroes that saved all the Earth... for ME TO PLAY WITH!' 'Maxis WILL KILL YOU ALL!' 'We must hurry because Maxis is a busy little beaver unt the dam he builds will kill you all! Trust me!'

The doc enjoys calling Stuhlinger nicknames. 'Sammy! Sammy boy! Are you ignoring me?' 'The clock is ticking my little pink sausage... you better move those porky little legs!'

The tactic of leaving a single crawler at the end of the round to take a break, Pack a Punch or complete Easter Egg steps seems to be a canon method Richtofen and the rest of Ultimis used throughout their journey to Moon. 'Ah. Trying to take a break I see.' 'Now which one of you is going to take care of that little bastard while everyone else runs around?'

He is acquainted with Nacht Der Untoten's main building and quotes that it looks familiar.

Die Rise: Interestingly enough, the events of Die Rise take place only a day after Tranzit, on the 22nd of October, 2035 in Shanghai, China.

The opening cutscene shows us that a demonic-sounding voice is ordering Samuel around and instructing him to 'mend the rift'. When Stuhlinger argues back, the voice reveals that it knows of Samuel's past acts of cannibalism when he was still a member of The Flesh and threatens to tell the others.

I'm not sure if this demonic voice is supposed to be Richtofen, or an Apothicon speaking to Stuhlinger, as we do hear the doc later on in the cutscene when he's telling Victis to 'Accept their fate. Begin anew.'

The cutscene also reveals that Richtofen teleported them from Washington to Shanghai and that when Victis dies, Richtofen has the power to rewind time, bringing them back to life and effectively giving them another chance to aid him against Maxis. Victis have no memory of their former deaths, only a sense of deja vu.

Strangely enough, Richtofen does this despite Victis siding with Maxis before in Tranzit and for some reason either chooses not to or can't rewind time after Victis previously chose to aid Maxis.

Once again, Victis ultimately sides with Maxis.

Unfortunately, one part of the Easter Egg involves getting balls wet with the Sliquifier. This proves too much for Richtofen, who becomes even hornier than usual and more sexually-frustrated than ever. This is made doubly uncomfortable by the fact that he is still currently in the body of a little girl. Oh, and he calls Stuhlinger a whore (...projection). "Look to the dragon. The energy flows! Oh, how it flows on my face." "JAA! MAKE THOSE BALLS WET, YOU WHORE!" "More! Keep going...(whispering) ugh you cannot have dry balls, dry balls ugh not good." "Ahhh, that was good. Maxis will no longer be able to get his filthy hands on those balls, those all-so-wet balls."

Buried: Takes place on 31st of December, 2035 in Angola, Africa. The opening cinematic shows Victis travelling on foot, so Richtofen most likely didn't teleport them to the location.

It's implied in the opening dialogue Richtofen and Stuhlinger engage in that the doctor hasn't been in contact with Stu as frequently, most likely because of Victis siding with Maxis on Tranzit and again on Die Rise. It's possible Richtofen was trying to contact other survivors to do his bidding in Victis' place. Nevertheless, Richtofen ultimately tries once more to get Samuel to convince the rest of Victis to do as he says, with no success.

Victis for the final time sides with Maxis, setting up the last polarisation tower to open the ‘rift’ for Maxis. This results in Maxis harnessing the power of the Aether and taking control of the zombies. Maxis kicks Richtofen out of Samantha's body and into the body of a zombie as a punishment. When the zombie is killed, Richtofen's soul enters another zombie nearby, damning the doctor to die over and over again at the hands of Victis. Maxis, powered by the Aether, sets out to reunite with Samantha, which will unfortunately lead to the destruction of Earth and all its inhabitants. This is the canonical ending.

In the non-canon ending where Victis sides with Richtofen in all the maps, he gains full control over the Aether and zombies and proceeds to erase Maxis from existence. Edward seems disinterested in returning to his own body and now has the power to rejoin the physical world, which he does by taking over Stuhlinger's body... or at least attempts to. Much to the doctor's surprise, Samuel survives Richtofen's body-snatching attempt and the two now must share/fight for control over Stuhlinger's body. Richtofen appears stuck in Stuhlinger's body and admits that he didn't think this through.

Similar to Die Rise, Richtofen is ridiculously horny in this map. 'Aha, you are making an old German very happy... unt stiff.' 'Keep going! I do not want you to stop... not even for breathe... ahaha.' 'You are reaching the climatic moment... oh it feels good ja?'

He's also ridiculously childish, repeatedly yapping about playing games and having fun. 'Curse you Maxis! You and your stupid girl! You are always ruining my fun unt games!' 'Now, throw the pennies into the fountain and we get to play a fun little game ahaha.' 'Now you go from grumbly hateful to hungry grateful ahahaha! I rhymed!' 'Ah, it's really not that different from how things were before, Sammy. We get to talk to each other, play games! It's really quite exciting! You'll like the fact that we're gonna be eating more salad.'

Alludes to 'the cycle', a big part of the zombie storyline we see in B03 and BO4. 'Nein. It cannot be like this forever. There has to be a way to break the cycle.'

He knows the rest of Victis disliked Stuhlinger. 'Now search their cold, dead bodies aha. It shouldn't be too upsetting - I know you weren't close!'

Interestingly, similar to his Primis counterpart, he feels a strong urge to be needed by others/meet their approval. Also like his Primis self, he is disgusted by dirt and mess. 'I just want to feel needed again!' 'Ahh! The bodies are so filthy! So dirty so stinky! Would it kill you to stop eating brains and take a shower!'

Richtofen acts self-pitying and disgusted when stuck in the body of a zombie, and seems to feel its hunger for flesh. 'This is horrible!' 'What have I ever done to deserve this torment?!' 'I'm trapped! I'm rotting! I'm hungry!'

So we've reached the end of Black Ops 2 Zombies Richtofen! This is where I think Richtofen's comedic elements and insanity reached its apex— time for the gradual come down.

Time Zombified/comics: So there was a miniseries of comics by Dark Horse Comics and published by Activision that followed Victis attempting to escape the end of the world caused by Maxis in Buried. In the comics, we see that the Victis crew is being pursued by an intelligent zombie that is uncannily dressed in a Nazi General's uniform. The zombie is, of course, Ultimis Richtofen, who turns out to be working with his Primis counterpart to acquire Victis and help Primis Richtofen attain the Kronorium.

Undead Richtofen retains his intelligence and ability to plan, as well as having a newfound ability to control the movements of other zombies in the nearby vicinity.

Sometime after the comics, Undead Richtofen teleports to Groom Lake, where the rest of Ultimis, who teleported from the Moon after the completion of the Moon Easter Egg, are captured and experimented on by the Americans. Undead Richtofen found his old body, comatose after the events of Buried, and transferred his soul into it. He was subsequently imprisoned with the rest of Ultimis and experimented on and had to be sedated multiple times due to how animated he was.

Honestly, I have no idea how Ultimis Richtofen wasn't straight up murdered by the rest of Ultimis given both his betrayal and the fact they now remember he performed unethical experiments on them back in Siberia. Instead, he's seen just uneasily chilling with them again. They had plenty of opportunites to do so as well, considering they were all held in the same cell and not restrained. Perhaps the attempted brainwashing/mind control Richtofen had previously done to the rest of Ultimis prevented them from outright killing him or maybe Ultimis Richtofen managed to persuade them that he'd be able to break them out. It's also possible that the rest of Ultimis was simply too depressed/traumatized to bother killing Richtofen.

According to a quote from Dempsey in Alpha Omega, Ultimis were captured, tortured and experimented on for a few months.

As shown in Classified's easter egg ending, a post-moon Nikolai, Takeo and Dempsey and a post-buried Richtofen now back in his own body are held captive in a cell in Hanger 4 by the Americans. It's implied that all 4 are suffering from overexposure to element 115 and are unethically experimented on. Abruptly, the Primis crew arrive and free Ultimis from their imprisonment, bringing them to Camp Edward.

Alpha Omega: Ah, Alpha Omega. This marks the last time Ultimis Richtofen, as well as the rest of Ultimis and Primis are playable and the only time both crews are playable on one map. There's plenty of dialogue and interactions in this map to get through, so let's get started.

Richtofen is happy to be reunited with his old team and urges them to 'forgive unt forget' when it comes to the small matter of him betraying and torturing them and dooming the planet. 'Anyway, Dempsey, I think we've got off on the wrong feet. I'm a changed man! I've got absolutely zero intentions of blowing anything... up.' 'Hooray! The gangs all here again! Isn't it so nice to be reunited! Especially after all that nasty business on the moon.'

He's absolutely ecstatic to be back to slaughtering zombies. 'BLEED FOR ME, I LOVE IT!' 'More blood! I can NEVER HAVE ENOUGH!' 'I'm so happy I cry!'

Edward seems to no longer hear the voices/the apothicons and may be slightly saner because of it. He doesn't mention them in Alpha Omega or Tag der Toten.

Once again, Richtofen fails to contain his horniness. 'I swear, I'll put anything down my throat...' 'Mmm, just like gargling ball sweat - oops! I meant boar sweat.' 'You're very precise, Takeo! Almost anally so...'

He did not like the experiments the Americans ran on him while imprisoned in Groom Lake. 'I do so love experiments, especially devious ones... BUT ONLY WHEN I AM THE DOCTOR!'

Richtofen acts more antagonistic towards both Ultimis and Primis Nikolai on this map, probably because Primis Nikolai is leading both groups and both Richtofens are put out by that fact. Despite still claiming to hate Dempsey, he acts slightly less antagonistic to both versions in Alpha Omega. 'I cannot believe I am taking orders from Nikolai Dummkopf Belinski!' 'You are too kind! Especially to Nikolai. He's an idiot.' 'I would applaud, Dempsey, but my handsss are kinda busy.' 'Dempsey, dear Dempsey, I am not quite as self-obsessed as you seem to think. Not everything is about me you know!'

Ultimis Richtofen apparently owns a summer cabin in Bulgaria, that has regular poison gas leaks.

He's aware that he's melodramatic. 'You're being very melodramatic, Takeo. And coming from me that's... that's really saying something.'

Ultimis Richtofen considers his Primis self better looking, but claims he has no sense of humour. He also claims his other self ultimately failed to achieve his goals and that he wets the bed. 'That other Richtofen may be younger unt better looking, but he has no sense of humour!' 'And how did my overly emotional doppelganger do? He failed. He messed everything up. Just like when he wet the bed.'

Edward wears contact lenses. 'Someone come help me find my contact lenses.. and maybe restart my heart.'

Like Ultimis Dempsey often does, Richtofen breaks the fourth wall a few times. 'Did you try shouting for your player friends?!' 'You answered the crawl of duty, wink wink, unt you paid the price!'

Ultimis Nikolai, Dempsey and Takeo along with the Primis crew actively despise Ultimis Richtofen for obvious reasons. 'Aw what happened Richtofen? Nuke go off?' 'Frankly, if he's still standing at the end of this, I'm gonna be pissed.' 'I know my other self can be rather... eccentric. Annoying, even. But we really are quite different!' 'I find that very hard to believe, Richtofen. You are all equally unlikeable and unreliable.' 'One fact remains undeniable: you are an evil that must be stopped.'

He's salty about the fact/somehow knows about that his Primis self shot a version of Ultimis Richtofen in the face, as seen in bo3's the giant opening. 'What did my other self ever do to you? Did he shoot you in the face??' 'Remember it? Of course, I don't remember it! When you're shot in the head, memory loss is one the most common side effects.'

Ultimis Richtofen's much more absent-minded in this map in particular and struggles with memory issues that seem to be getting worse. He has definitely cognitively declined since the days of Shi No Numa. 'this reminds me, I really do need to do laundry.' 'Hello, orb! My name's Edward and I fight the undead. What exactly do you do?' 'Finally! Now I can get back to pursuing my own interests! Hmm...' 'Okay Edward, don't forget you have this... this... what was I talking about?'

Despite his more happy-go-lucky attitude in this map, Richtofen has bouts of suicidal ideation. 'Sometimes I think death would have been a mercy...' 'I'm surprised you didn't just put me out my misery.'

Tag Der Toten: The sanest version of Ultimis Richtofen we see in any map. Takes place on October 13th 2025. This is the final appearance of Ultimis Richtofen and at the end, he's incredibly calm, almost melancholy. His voice is much deeper-pitched than usual, and he sounds almost like his Primis counterpart.

Interestingly enough, it seems to legitimately pain Richtofen to have to lie to and manipulate Stuhlinger again. He's much kinder to Samuel in this map than he was in bo2, and seems fond of him. 'Oh, I'm watching Sammy. Kudos on the headshot.' 'I know, Sammy. I found you mildly amusing too.' 'It's them or you, Sammy and who would I talk to if you were gone?' 'I'm proud of you, Sammy. You are a veritable killing machine today!'

We hear in the campfire quotes in Tag Der Toten, that Ultimis and Primis spent one last night together, sharing stories, drinking together and acting like friends. Around the campfire, Ultimis Richtofen stated honestly that 'he just wanted power, preferably absolute' and that he 'wasn't sorry for anything and had the time of his life'. He was also surprised by his Primis self admitting he once saw Maxis as a father figure and commented he only ever saw Maxis as a bitter rival. Ultimis Richtofen's hatred of Samantha has also seemed to lesson somewhat by Tag Der Toten.

Unbeknown to Ultimis and the rest of Primis, Primis Nikolai secretly poisoned their drinks, killing Ultimis Nikolai, Ultimis Takeo, Ultimis Dempsey, Primis Richtofen, Primis Dempsey and Primis Takeo. Instead of dying, Ultimis Richtofen reverts to his Zombified state and begins instructing Stuhlinger and by extension, the rest of Victis throughout their last journey to build the Agarthan Device.

At the end of the easter egg, Ultimis Richtofen apologises to Samuel just as he and the rest of Victis is banished into the dark aether. Richtofen is then shot in the head by Primis Nikolai, killing him instantly. Primis Nikolai then goes on end the multiverse in the hopes of creating a better timeline, free of corruption and his last act is to have Samantha shoot him.

As Samantha and Eddie, a child version of Richtofen, travel to the new world, we hear the final wishes of Ultimis and Primis. Ultimis Richtofen's final wish is to relax and perhaps open his own morgue.

Bonus Fun Facts/Stuff I Forgot To Mention!

Edward is somewhere in his late 50s to early 60s, by the time Ultimis arrives at Shi No Numa.

Richtofen first joined the Illuminati in 1925 and left the organisation in 1942. When he first joined the Illuminati, Edward would have likely been somewhere in his late 30's to early 40's.

He joined Group 935 in 1936, originally to leak intel back to the Illuminati. He would have likely been around his late 40's to early 50's when he started working with Group 935.

Edward went to boarding school, according to a quote on Alpha Omega.

He references Germany's financial collapse after WW1 in Ascension. 'The inflation is killing me.'

Ultimis Dempsey hates Richtofen, Ultimis Nikolai is neutral towards Richtofen until the latter's betrayal on Moon and Ultimis Takeo liked Richtofen until he started regaining his memories on Ascension. From then on, Takeo only pretends to be friendly towards Richtofen, while secretly scheming behind his back. The 'Takeo is the first to remember' sub-plot from bo1 never really goes anywhere, however, as Richtofen ultimately succeeds in taking over the MPD and betrays the rest of Ultimis anyway on Moon.

Richtofen liked/respected Dr. Groph and Dr. Schuster and acted favourably towards them even after he lost his mind. 'Excellent, Dr. Schuster. Commence test number 151.' 'And you, Dr. Groph, are now the lead scientist here at Griffin Station.' 'Don't worry Dr. Schuster. I had you go with the Americans. It'd be good for your softer side.' However, as he grew more paranoid and his madness took root, it's clear he distanced himself from them, treating them more like pawns and with less respect. 'I'm more than alive, Mr. Schuster. Is the device still intact?' 'Yes, I will dispose of Dr. Maxis and that little brat personally. Do not. Touch. Anything.'

While Richtofen hates Dempsey and looks down on him/enjoys mocking him for his simple nature and lack of intelligence, he may be begrudgingly attracted to the marine, depending on the map/Richtofen's depiction. He has made flirtatious remarks and even grabbed his...yeah, in Call of the Dead. 'Hello Dempsey! Aren't you a sight for my sore eyes.' 'I hate you, Dempsey. I even hate your eyes.' 'Big Dempsey... you're so BIG!' Conversely: 'Oh Dempsey, have you always been this ugly?' 'I hate you, Dempsey. I hate your ugly voice.' 'Dempsey, you annoy me. And you're disgusting. AND I HATE YOUR FACE AND YOUR NECK!'

Richtofen is amused by and has a crush on Nikolai, which seems to fade by the time Alpha Omega takes place. 'Look Nikolai! How romantic!' 'Come on my big strong Russian bear! Arrr!' 'It's so slippery unt wet unt joyful! Just like you, Nikolai!' 'Maybe we should strap explosives to Nikolai's back!' 'I know it must be hard, having your smart, handsome, sober brother showing up... waving his big, fat soul in your face.' 'I wish my Nikolai knew how to shoot straight - or in fact do anything of use.'

Richtofen is either indifferent to or mildly dislikes Takeo. 'Oh, it's a picture of the monkey bomb.' 'Takeo has always been so quiet. For some reason, no matter the pain, he was always so respectful. I hate that.' 'I always liked you, Takeo! Even when I didn't.'

The entire Primis crew hates Ultimis Richtofen, especially his Primis self for obvious reasons.

The Shadowman thinks favourably of Ultimis Richtofen, according to his dialogue in Revelations. 'You do know that Richtofen is a friend of mine? I say friend, but really he's so much more than that. At one point, I almost considered him my apprentice.' 'At one point he did everything I told him to. I keep hoping he'll remember the promise he made to me, so long ago.'

Dr. Monty thinks of Ultimis Richtofen as evil, childish and an idiot. 'Richtofen, crazy Richtofen, evil Richtofen, remember him? Fucking idiot blew up the Earth! It didn't really all go to plan though, did it? He never even had a plan. He ended up trying to enlist the help of some other idiots left in the apocalyptic wasteland.'

Russman, Misty and Marlton dislike/distrust all versions of Richtofen. Stuhlinger likes/looks up to Ultimis Richtofen despite his axe-crazy personality and called him 'the sweetest guy in the whole universe' in Tag Der Toten. Likewise, I believe Richtofen did develop a soft spot for Samuel over time as he's the only person Ultimis Richtofen has ever expressed genuine remorse for. At the end of Tag Der Toten's Easter Egg: 'I know. And I'm so sorry.'

While the voices Richtofen heard after touching the MPD on the moon were never an auditory hallucination brought on by Schizophrenia, they were real entities that we later find out were the Apothicons/Shadowman, he may have also developed schizophrenia later on anyway due to the effects the voices had on his mental state. Some of Richtofen's in-game quotes hint at him hearing and seeing things that clearly aren't there. When interacting with Nikolai's portrait in Kino: 'His eyes are following me...' When getting the monkey bomb: 'Do you hear him talking to you, Nikolai?' When getting the Wunderwaffe DG2: Do you hear it talking to me?' Furthermore, Edward is also aware of the fact he's mentally ill: 'Carefully balanced... much like my mental state!' 'It's not always fun being like this...'

Richtofen's favourite food is potato salad. His favourite drink may be root beer.

Edward may have arthritis, according to a quote in der riese.

Despite claiming to hate monkeys, Richtofen apparently considered adopting one and enjoys spanking them according to a sus quote on Alpha Omega. 'I find monkeys annoying. I spank them every chance I get...' Furthermore, Dempsey implies Richtofen may have done obscene things with the monkey bombs. 'Richtofen, stop trying to hump the stuffed monkey, man! It's creeping me out.' 'If anyone's done anything... borderline with that monkey, it's Richtofen, man.' 'Richtofen, don't get any ideas. I don't think it's legal!'

For some reason, Richtofen owns an MP3 player. Where he got it is never elaborated on. He also somehow might have watched Back To The Future at some point, as he makes a reference to the film in Ascension. '1.21 Gigawatts! Now where have I heard that before?'

Why Richtofen wears a WW2 Nazi General's uniform is never explained in any of the games. It's especially confusing as in the lore, it's clear that Richtofen disliked the Nazi party and especially Group 935's secret affiliation with them, courtesy of Maxis. Out of Universe, Richtofen's model was taken from the WAW campaign; he shares the same model as Amsel. World at War Richtofen was originally meant to be a Nazi Officer/interrogator, which is shown in Richtofen's WAW bio: '"Beware The Doc". A message that was scrawled across walls of every town under Axis control. Starvation may cripple you, dysentery may wreck you, and gunfire may rip the flesh from your bones, but "Beware the Doctor". This is Dr. Richtofen, known affectionately as "The Butcher" to his victims as they scream in agony moments before he snuffs out their light. All through his career, Richtofen has been at the forefront of torture and information extraction research. Richtofen is an incurable sociopath and sees no moral distinction between natural death and murder; the victim is the victim, regardless of how their demise manifests itself.'

However, this was later softly retconned; Richtofen became a scientist of Group 935 only affiliated with the Nazi party through a deal Maxis secretly made, though he was previously a member of the Illuminati of his own volition. Personally, I think Ultimis Richtofen wears the uniform just because he thinks it looks good and gives off an air of authority. It also probably helped him blend in with the other members of Ultimis, as they were all military figures. However, this is all mostly speculation.

Richtofen has shown sexual attraction to both men and, rarely, women - he's most likely Bi or Pansexual with a preference for men. 'Oh, she sounds like a sweet little specimen!' 'Hm, I hope this drink doesn't affect my fertility... oh the thought of little Doctors!'

Richtofen is a serial molester who belongs on the sex offender registry, according to the Call of the Dead Easter Egg and numerous other quotes. 'Ow! Let go! That's not a LEVER. RICHTOFEN!!' 'Just because the lights aren't on doesn't mean I can't kick your ass, Richtofen. *Dempsey slaps Richtofen hard enough for the German to fall over* Now get your finger out of mine!' 'You remind me of a patient, except you make less noise when I stick things in you...' 'that's... that's still not a lever, Richtofen.'

Speaking of Call of the Dead, Edward is also likely to be physically weaker and less durable than his super soldier test subjects. A single slap from Dempsey in cotd was enough to floor him.

Richtofen has cannibalistic tendencies. 'First I will cook them, then I will eat them!' 'I will help you, Dempsey, but only because I want to be the one to eat your heart!'

Richtofen may have necrophilic tendencies. 'Their screams are so... erotic, ja...' 'Oh, could you FEEL it going in?' 'Oh, how I love the sexy undead!' 'Shame, Takeo. His head was his only redeeming feature. Such a pretty mouth...'

Edward is a narcissist and has a god complex. 'I am all powerful!' 'I AM A GOD!' 'You know, I used to be in your shoes... then I became an all powerful, omnipotent being haha!'

Along with being a sadist, Edward is a hardcore masochist, to the point he enjoys having spikes rammed up his backside. 'Oh! Oh, that's... that's good, that's okay, buy me dinner next time.' 'Oh, you have spikes in you now! You like that? The spikes? I do...' 'I would hurt so good if I put my hand in there...'

Richtofen may have also prostituted himself at some point, according to more sussy quotes from shangri-la. 'Ah, t-that's usually an extra fifty!' 'Hey Richtofen, how 'bout some knee time? What, you like that anyway!' 'Ten points a pull, bet Rectalfun would do it for free.'

According to Ultimis Dempsey, Richtofen's got small dick energy. 'This portrait's bigger than everyone else's. Must be tryna compensate for something.' '.5 millimetres of love, just like Richtofen!'

Richtofen takes pride in his appearance and is fashion-conscious. 'Not the prettiest thing I've ever worn but it will do.' 'Ugh, these stains will never come out of my uniform!' 'The steel is so clean I can almost see my reflection - Oh you handsome devil...' 'Oh, I may need this but I do hate to mess up my hair.'

Richtofen has an unhealthy obsession with spleens, a trait he shares with Samantha. Perhaps due to Apothicon influence? Maybe Samantha and Richtofen inherited their love for spleens after getting corrupted.

Speaking of Samantha, Richtofen enjoyed being in her body, and called his child self a 'little girl' on Moon. Make of that as you will.

Given that 10 years passed from the events of Moon to Tranzit and then presumably a few months to a year from Tranzit to the end of the Call of duty zombies' comics, at a rough estimate, Ultimis Richtofen would have been in his late 60's to early 70's at the time of his death in Tag Der Toten.

As a last note, I want to highlight the absolute mental decline and personality change that Ultimis Richtofen went through, from all the way back in 1939 before he was corrupted by the apothicons/shadowman to the end of Buried where we see him at his absolute most insane. He went from acting and sounding like this: https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/callofduty/images/2/2c/Moon_Audio_Log_1_BO.ogg/revision/latest?cb=20130811020209

To this: https://youtu.be/2UxWGDwIpg4

The difference is just staggering. And yet the evolution of his character doesn't end there. On Alpha Omega, Richtofen is more mentally stable than when he was in bo2, serving as the demonic announcer, thanks in part to apparently no longer hearing the voices and having time to reflect on everything that has happened to him during his imprisonment at Groom Lake.

By Tag Der Toten, Ultimis Richtofen is sounding nearly as calm as his Primis self: https://youtu.be/JudP0Eo634E Not to say he fully regains his sanity, but he does become more sound of mind before his death.

Well, I hope you enjoyed this in-depth analysis of Ultimis Richtofen and his transformation throughout the games! This was fun to write, but goddamn took me a long time. I hope it's an informative and interesting read. Feel free to add anything I've missed or got wrong in replies/tags :)

#codz #cod zombies #call of duty zombies #call of duty #richtofen #ultimis richtofen #edward richtofen #character analysis #my post #he's the worst person ever and has commited countless atrocites but its still hard not to adore him as a character lol #might make a post containing all parts of this long ass post

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