#Otherwise we have character that I've drawn before and still really like my takes of hehe

[reksink]

A Gaggle of Children from a Tortured Mind of One

[666writingcafe]

The Bookstore

Content Warning: anxiety attack x Satan

"I have to say, I really like this bookstore," Satan tells me softly. "It's so quiet and peaceful in here, and they have a really large selection of books."

"I've always been drawn to this one," I reply. "It feels more cozy than a traditional store. Sadly, I've had to limit the amount of time I spend in here, because otherwise I'd go into debt from spending all my money on books."

"Does your employer not pay you enough?" I sigh.

"I mean, I have enough to cover bills and other necessities. I just try to have some money saved up in case of an emergency."

"I see." Satan pauses long enough to clear his throat. "So, um, it's been a while since I've read anything from the human world, and I was wondering if you had any recommendations."

"Define 'a while'." He glances down at the ground, a slight blush developing on his cheeks.

"Shakespeare..." Honestly, that sounds about right. I figured it must have been a few centuries ago.

"Comedy or tragedy?"

"It was a comedy, I think. Much Ado About Nothing? I liked the dynamic between the two main characters. Benedict and Beatrice." Perfect.

"Follow me."

~~~

In the end, we've settled on ten books: The Importance of Being Earnest, Pride and Prejudice, Jane Eyre, Great Expectations, The Mysteries of Udolpho, The Castle of Otranto, Frankenstein, Dracula, Interview with the Vampire, and A Clockwork Orange.

There's a lot more that I think Satan would enjoy, but I don't want to overwhelm him. Knowing him, he'll have these ten books finished in a couple of months--and be able to talk intelligently about them.

"Hey, do you remember which way we came from?" Satan asks. "I want to say it was from the right..." He stops mid-sentence. "Wait, no. Maybe it was the left?" He's getting anxious. I can tell.

"Take a deep breath and try to relax," I instruct. "If we stick together, we'll find our way out." He doesn't seem to hear me.

How could he? He's having an attack.

He doesn't allow many people to see him like this, not even his brothers. The only exception is Asmo, although Lucifer does know about them.

It's not like Satan wanted me to witness him in this state, either. I merely stumbled into the situation the first time.

What makes his attacks different than, let's say, a human's, is that his anxiety is quite prone to becoming anger, and considering that he's the literal Avatar of Wrath...

Not even the amount of money Diavolo gave me would be enough to cover a damaged bookstore.

I set my stack of books down before grabbing his from him and putting it next to mine. Then, I gently guide him to sit next to me on the floor.

"Count or touch?" I ask him. Sometimes, he's able to handle external sensations when he's in this state, but other times he doesn't want to be near anything that can even remotely brush up against him.

Silently, he scooches closer to me.

"Are you sure?" He nods his head, and I wrap my arm around him. I don't mind that he's currently not talking. That means that he still has some control over his emotions.

After a few moments, Satan sighs.

"If only I could have you this close all the time," he murmurs. "You have a soothing heartbeat."

[neonshifts]

Shifting so far feels like being the ultra-powerful character with great power, but no control. Things like how in Spyro: A New Beginning, Spyro more or less does things like breathe new elements, and has to sort of wrangle control over what he's acquired. It's there in him, but he needs to learn it.

I'm rambling while listening to some ambiance, trying to put my head on straight. I think I got very close once. The time where the weight and kick of dumping a magazine into a lycan startled me back to full consciousness while trying to do a lucid dreaming way of shifting... Earlier, and even still kind of now, feeling this emphasis drawn to my wrists? I need to explain.

I was made an ambient track by a partner of music, ambient noise, character dialogue, and them going about the room and doing stuff. It was made because I was so head over heels, and I used it to sleep, help with panic attacks (I have panic disorder, so my body is really good at panicking for no reason,) and otherwise just chilling out to. I really enjoy casual bondage, as just a comforting thing. I used to lay there on my side with it going and visualize so strongly that I was tied to a chair, or otherwise bound while the character simulated going about their things and occasionally talking to me that I felt some sort of emphasis drawn to my ankles and limbs. No feeling of rope, but I'd end up drawing them together like I was tied and feeling that same weird focus on them...

Well, because I know no chill (even here,) I wanted to script my first genuine shift to Resi8's general locale to start similarly to when Heisenberg drags Ethan to Miranda. So, bound and to be argued over. We like to feel special in this house, and again, I find that kind of thing exponentially comforting... Seemed natural to impliment.

It's there again. That same emphasis.

I'm realizing now I may have been shifting to Skyfall on accident this whole time... But not all the way. Just one foot in the door.

I can't hear the arguing or see the room. I can't visualize super well. My ADHD makes my mind wander too easily. I've basically been narrating things like I'm writing a novel. "I can see Alcina, although I'd need to tilt my head to see her face if I were not pretending to be asleep still." Which is also important, I've been using that as my way to try and transition. Waking up to Heisenberg winning the argument to take me with him, and being asleep only being a matter of pretending until I see my dr, or hear it, ect.

I can't get as far as before again though, where I must have been fighting a lycan or something and came back when the feeling of the hk21 or galil being dumped out woke me up again out of shock. Still, this is progress and a revelation all in one. Despite my rambling, I've been holding onto that feeling in my wrists and ankles. Please, please, pleeeease send me your good vibes and well wishes. I'd like to be somewhere else a while.

[beevean]

I think I understood another key with which to read Shizune's route, in particular her bad ending:

Hisao cheats on Misha if he gets overwhelmed by Shizune's personality.

Shizune means well, as she genuinely enjoys making people happy, but she is a controlling, overbearing person. This is the core of her character. I pointed out how she is the only girl who, the Saturday before the festival, doesn't wait for Hisao to come to her, but instead she is the one physically dragging Hisao out of his room. This is what she does: she drags people into her life, and then takes control, because otherwise she's not quite sure of how to keep people nearby.

This is not a good thing. Misha shows why it's not a good thing. Shizune kept Misha nearby despite her heartache - of course because she liked her as a friend, not just out of selfish reasons, but her "comparmentalizing" mentality still caused the poor girl pain.

If you choose to "comfort" Misha, we get this line:

After all, I've only had sex once before, and I was restrained to a chair. This time, I'm in control, like I'd wished then.

When Shizune and Hisao had sex at her place, she seized complete control. She tied him to a chair, which is the equivalent of gagging him, and then rode him, without him being able to do anything. Hisao noted that she seemed to alternate between aggressiveness and naiveté, like a girl pretending to be a woman: most likely, she also saw this act as a challenge to win. The thing is that Hisao didn't sound fully on board:

NARRATOR: "I wonder exactly when it was that I started being attracted to her. Not just attracted to her physically, but drawn to her. And, I wonder why. She's pretty, but then, also very combative. Not just that, but she seems to like being that way. The way she's acting now, however, and at other times, doesn't really fit that image. I'm starting to think that maybe her tying my hands might have been for more reasons than just the most obvious." NARRATOR: "Still, that aggressiveness that she flashes around as comfortably as a business card is real. I don't know whether or not that kind of attitude could be considered dangerous. If it is, I wonder what kind of person that makes me. It was probably the first week I was here. A week doesn't sound so long when I think about it, but at the time it did. Even though I pretty much thought my days were numbered that week, it still seemed to go by so slowly. Even if she can't hear me, it puts me at ease. I started to realize that I didn't have that much to complain about. But there's still... Well, never mind."

Hisao's sentiment is pretty much "it's nice, but". The last line might refer to his hesitation at having been put in this position of submission, which he decides to brush off, but still lingers.

He wanted control. He wanted at the very least a higher degree of freedom. The freedom Shizune didn't afford him, because Shizune has seized control of his life, and the only time Hisao is even allowed to make a choice, it's when she's nowhere to be seen.

And he can choose to break free from Shizune's control in the worst way possible, getting closer to the less overbearing Misha. Remember: the route falsely implies that Misha is crushing on Hisao, before the big reveal that she's actually interested in Shizune.

At this point, whether Hisao slept with Misha or not, Shizune realizes that she's been a bad friend and girlfriend for yanking people around, and she comes out with the grand plan of asking Hisao to cheer Misha up for her.

The branching point between good and bad ending is that in the latter, not only Misha never recovers, but Lilly shows up again.

This scene is mostly remembered for being a huge continuity error: what is she doing here, isn't she supposed to be in Scotland? That's true. But aside from this, it's interesting that Lilly has one last conversation with Hisao the moment his relationship with Shizune has started to irreversibly spiral.

This scene only exists for Lilly to voice Hisao's, and maybe the player's, thoughts about Shizune:

LILLY: "I wish you hadn't been so quick to join. I don't like the way Shizune runs the Student Council. Did you know that she scared off most of the old members? That is why I think she tries to surround herself with people who won't oppose her. And they don't. It's like a dependency bubble."

LILLY: "Is that so? Either way, there is no point in attempting to force them to make up. Always try to confront everything head-on is what Shizune would do, but it doesn't work in the real world. At some point, it's just being stubborn, not bravery or good intentions."

LILLY: "When I joined the Student Council, I thought it would just mean helping everything run smoothly and helping people out, like being the class representative. Instead, every day consisted of having Shizune stomp around, using Misha like a megaphone, to talk about how we had to outdo the last Student Council, and create more and more events, and make them increasingly larger."

HISAO: "Yeah, sure. The point is, I think I understand what it's all about now. You're really giving Shizune too much of a hard time." LILLY: "That might be true, but when it comes to how she treats individual people, she doesn't do very well." NARRATOR: "Unfortunately, that one is a little harder to argue."

It's all about Shizune's flaws. It's all about her abrasive personality, her stubborness. Lilly accuses her of wrapping herself in a dependancy bubble, of using Misha like a megaphone, and by the end, not even Hisao can defend her. He might understand Shizune's vision for the Student Council, but he has grown tired of everything Lilly has pointed out - after all, it's why he went behind her back, right?

And to an extent, he's right, because when things come to a breaking point, Shizune once again falls into her old selfishness: it's her who decides that she wants to be away from other people, because she has decided thar she's a terrible person who poisons every relationship of hers. Of course, Hisao really has no fucking right to call her selfish anymore, after what he did... but he does have a point. It's just sad under multiple angles.

Of course, you can also choose to see his decision to "comfort" Misha in another way: him succumbing to passivity once again.

"As much as I pretend to protest, I've allowed things to come to this point. Even though I knew so far ahead of when she actually came out with it that this was what she was getting at. At the very least, I was okay with this outcome. If I needed any more proof, it's simple: I still haven't turned her away. I could have at any point, and it was wrong of me not to do it sooner, but now, not doing so is something beyond simple carelessness."

Hisao goes along with having sex with Misha because welp, might as well at this point! She wants this, so sure, why not.

So in summary, Hisao pushing Misha away in the good ending might be seen as 1) him taking a decision without Shizune's influence at all, 2) him respecting both Misha and Shizune enough to do the right thing, without any resentment or lingering crush getting in the way.

Sadly I wish I had more to say about Shizune's good ending, because I like her route, but that ending has little to do with her as a character and it's more about the theme of graduating and moving on. It is to note, of course, that if you do get the good ending, Hisao is rewarded with another sex scene with Shizune, and this time he's able to gain the control he wanted, the two being finally equals. And at least Shizune is able to recognize her flaws without pushing her friends away, because she had proof that they care about her and she has a positive impact on them.

Shizune's route is fun to analyze. It doesn't have the major feels, and most of the complaints against it make sense, but reading between the lines was the intent and personally I have a lot of fun with it. It helps that Shizune is a very well written character, reasonably flawed but still compelling. Kind of a shame that the bad ending is better written than the good ending, though.

[masterjedilenawrites]

Clones: Love Languages (Part 2!)

I've been incorporating a lot of other clones into my writing recently. Some from requests, some from my own curiosity. It can be a challenge to tap into a character that maybe only got a few brief moments of screen time, but I end up having so much fun with it, and I'd love to explore more of their personalities!

So, let's start with some good ol' fashioned love languages shall we? 😇

Keeli: Quality Time. Likes to schedule time with his loved ones, like date nights or weekend getaways. It helps him get rid of distractions and be more purposeful in giving them attention. Gets annoyed when his company texts someone else or otherwise gives attention to their holo-pad and not him.

Neyo: Acts of Service. Would rather do things himself so they get done right, and that urge becomes stronger when he's around his partner. Doesn't want them to lift a finger. Also likes to cover the cost of things, like a meal, a piece of jewelry, or even the utility bill. Says "it's on me" and never accepts reimbursement.

Blackout: Physical Touch. Is quiet and standoffish at first, and doesn't seem to be the touchy-feely type. He reserves all his touches for the few people he truly, deeply cares for, including his romantic partner. He thinks it's weird to get physically close to someone who is only an acquaintance or casual friend.

Gregor: Acts of Service. The first one to show up at a friend's house in a time of need, looking for things to do to help lighten the load. Continually checks in on everyone so they're taken care of. Romantically, he's the king of understated acts like pulling his partner's feet into his lap for a massage.

Howzer: Quality Time. Can create special moments of out seemingly nothing. Steals them away from a social gathering to admire the view, finds a way to make them laugh during a stressful time, takes a few extra minutes to hold them close and wish them a good morning. Sharing time even in small ways is enough for him.

Thorn: Acts of Service. Runs all the errands. He honestly would love nothing more than to get a text on his way home asking him to pick up some random item. He can always roll with the punches and find a creative solution to an unexpected problem, soothing his partner's worries with his swift attention.

Hound: Physical Touch. Always has a hand on his chosen person. On their lower back, across their shoulders, in their hair.... Finds it comforting if they do they same in return. He needs to explore the physical side of things with someone first, as much as they are comfortable with, before he can make more long-term commitments.

Mayday: Words of Affirmation. Recognizes and acknowledges effort. Even if it isn't perfect, or a big deal, he'll still say thank you or good job. He constantly texts his friends and loved ones throughout the day, just random little thoughts he has to share. He'll be incredibly grumpy if he doesn't have such an outlet.

Gree: Gift Giving. Really big on holidays, anniversaries, etc. He'll buy things year round that remind him of people, or that he thinks would generally make great gifts, and he'll keep them on standby for whatever occasion comes up. Also big on thank-you gifts as well, as they express more gratitude than what he can say with words.

Waxer: Physical Touch. Physical boundaries seemingly don't exist for him. He's always standing or sitting close to someone, clapping them on the back or socking them in the arm. And he's never shy in giving hugs. With a partner he somehow gets even closer, drawn to them like a clingy magnet.

Boil: Words of Affirmation. May be quiet at times, or even come across a bit grumpy, but he actually does love hearing people talk. The best active listener; makes his loved ones feel heard and usually remembers what they share so he can follow up on the topic later. Asks questions because he's genuinely curious what others think. 

Wooley: Gift Giving. He's like a crow, finding shiny objects to take back to the nest. He can't go anywhere without bringing something back for other people. It's usually small gifts, little trinkets and tokens picked up along the path of life. Or it'll be additions to a collection he knows his loved one's been searching for.

Everything Tag: @damerondala, @dangerousstrawberrypie, @fallingforthem, @harleyevanstan, @imabeautifulbutterfly, @justanothersadperson93, @misogirl828, @itsagrimm, @error6gendernotfound, @theroguesully, @clonesimp, @techie-bear

+Clones Tag: @marvel-starwars-nerd, @pandora-the-halfling, @darkangel4121, @sobstea, @rintheemolion, @dionysuskid21, @jesseeka, @hanbetired, @thatmultifandomdumbass, @sarahtanmarvel, @call-me-a-fool, @lackofhonor, @theclonesdeservebetter, @hannahhearttcw, @salaminus, @arctrooper69, @katzs-current-obsession, @501st-rexster, @rebel-finn, @not-a-big-slay, @writing-positivelyexisting, @nekotaetae, @the-mom-friend-dot-com, @pickle-rick-y, @flowered-bicycles, @lucyysthings, @severalseashellsbytheseashore

(Join my tag list here)

[raayllum]

hey I have some thoughts and theories on season six that I want to post but I feel like they’re kind of in cohesive and all over the place and rambly and I’m not really sure the best way to get them across especially when I’m more of a brainstorm type of personof like 10 different ways something could go I’m not really sure how to organize it or make it comprehensible to the average Tumblr scroller do you have any tips for this? because I want them to get reach cause I do feel like I’m contributing something but sometimes I think what I’m saying makes no sense at all or no one’s going to read all that you know. or, TLDR: Do you have any tips on making meta in general since you seem to be the main producer of it in the fandom ha ha, your input would be invaluable

So I actually did start writing a post a while ago about well, a kind of how to guide for writing meta, but it felt very self-gratuitous so it got semi-banished to the drafts although I still might finish / clean it up and post it someday

That being said your ask does make me realize that your query is not something I had considered going over, approaching it from more of a "here's how to train your brain to notice things that can be fun to write meta about" > organizing said thoughts, so thank you for bringing it to my attention! I hope some of this advice will be useful, and it may even have some overlap with other thoughts I had planned

The most useful way I've found when it comes to meta is treating it like an essay, with an introduction, body paragraphs / sections (and sometimes headers), and a conclusion of some kind when warranted. This means looking for similarities or main ideas with possible consistent threads (i.e. avenues Aaravos' evil plans could go might be split off into branches, each one detailing a different avenue). So that would be my best advice when it comes to organization.

However, most concerns about "not making sense" comes down to thinking through what context you have to provide for your audience to understand what you're discussing, depending on the length and depth of the leap / analysis. Are there any symbols being drawn upon we will want to explain in more detail before theorizing how they relate to the show? Are there any smaller details or scene summaries to include when putting these things together?

For example, when I wrote a meta about Rayla being the metaphorical light to Callum's darkness (pre-S5), I first had to establish why I associated her with light, drawing from visual examples from S1, S2, and S4, as well as the "Dear Callum" letter. Callum's side of things was more straightforward with dialogue in the text. Then I could take it one step further and talk about why this light-dark duality indicates that she will likely save him from possession after possibly leading to the fall in the first place. But I had to go from a bottom-top approach in steadily building the layers rather than starting from the top and working my way down, as for more symbolic matters in particular, that can often be confusing.

Although sometimes more simplistic, consulting the 5 Ws (who, what, where, when, and why) can likewise be useful in meta in terms of 1) tracing where certain ideas are coming from in the text, 2) what is being posited/suggested, and 3) why these things might be conflated, and 4) who might be involved. Obviously meta tends to be more "what" heavy, particularly when its predictive, but it's kinda like explaining why one character might be more involved in one plot line than another, etc. There's going to be a Why to that Who, and those things both combine to form the What (otherwise known as theory or just plain analysis).

And don't be concerned about if people are gonna wanna read it. I find most people in TDP fandom are pretty down to theorize even if they may not necessarily write a lot of it down themselves (and often have cool ideas/contributions too!) and I am the king of making things overly long, yet people muscle through anyway!

That's about it for me without more specifics (a character study vs foil vs theme vs prediction are all kinda different in their own way) but I would love to hear more if you'd like to message me off anon or if you have more thoughts/questions you'd like to leave in my inbox once that's opened back up! Have fun theorizing, have fun writing, always feel free to break longer metas up into smaller bite sized ones as you go, and I look forward to seeing them int the tags!

[endermen-impasta]

Our Art Style: An Explanation

< Hi-ya guys! I'm here to give a deep dive into our art style! In the past I've gotten some comments on posts that I should close my lines or that it doesn't look "real" and so I'm here to info dump on what I do to draw. (( also how I draw so fast ))

< The art style we use is a cartoon-ish one! It's not meant to be real, and it's supposed to keep characters simple, colorful, and more expression-like. It gives the characters more feeling and sometimes a better view on what they're feeling, so on.

< Why our art has so many disconnected lines is because our art isn't meant for animation; it's for comics, pictures, and anything that stands still. The open lines also make our art fluid and easier to pose in more expressive ways. We've started to do more complicated poses with our art, which isn't made to be drawn together as one line!

< On our art journey we didn't really have any drawing references or practice with other art styles. We made our style without anything at all! It was only last year that we actually got art references that help us get better. Our art style is unique and it's just like that ig.

< Why we draw so fast is because drawing was the only thing we could do practically (( before writing )) When someone says "practice makes perfect " they mean it. It takes us about a minute and thirty seconds to draw a character we know how to draw! The broken lines also help out with it, but otherwise we had A LOT of practice with doing only art ever since we could pick up a pencil.

[kylosbreedingkink]

I get so dismayed by a lot of Luke takes. He's either the best thing ever and the sequel trilogy is just wrong because Luke isn't this perfect being, or he's the absolute worst thing and led a cult because he was mean to Kylo.

How about the middle ground, which is more accurate to how we as humans are anyway? A man with all the best intentions, taking on perhaps a bit too much in his quest to do good, having so much going on that he misses or overlooks things. A perfectly natural thing to happen. Or maybe is so excited and positive about things that when the negative side swings in he isn't equipped to deal with it - either ignoring or overreacting.

He's not a teacher but knew so many kids needed help with the Force that he sought to create a school for them. He doesn't have the teacher training background or even other older Jedi physically there with him to help out. Instead he has the older students that he himself has taught and maybe some friends interested in the force despite not being force sensitive, like Lor San Tekka.

He grew up learning about how amazing the Jedi are and how perfect the Jedi order was, and he wants to replicate that. Perfectly understandable. So he goes by what the old Jedi texts say to do. He doesn't have the background in child psychology to think that perhaps removing children from their parents isn't always the best developmentally and I doubt Jedi texts would talk about all the times it went wrong - but be more focused on the rigidity and how it should go rather than how it did go. It would be natural for the Jedi themselves to not point out their own flaws. Basically the general fanon interpretation of Luke makes him so incredibly boring and simplified, I don't know why people want to do that when he could be such an interesting complex character. He's human, and humans make mistakes. He's not perfect. He's not evil. He's just a guy trying to do his best.

And sometimes someone trying their best doesn't work out. Luke trying his best wouldn't necessarily be what Kylo needed. Though Luke did do what he could using the tools he could find and what he had learned before.

He made mistakes. Kylo reacted to those mistakes in a way that it seemed even Kylo didn't really want to react.

Even the fact that Luke didn't know how to deal with the mistake he made and so went into hiding is so real. It's very human to try to run away from your mistakes. My main issue with him doing that was that there were still other students alive. Though him running is the most selfish thing he ever did and it was right off the back of him making the biggest fuck up ever. I think it's really human of him and is the thing which makes Luke interesting. As otherwise he's 1 dimensional good guy who never does wrong or the flip I've seen from others - evil cult leader. Luke was just as much drawn into the Jedi philosophy as anyone else, and he learned like the Jedi before that it isn't all roses.

[acourtofthought]

Saw your answer to the other anon about the next book and you kinda convinced me that it’ll be Elucien! If so, AHHHHHHHH. *proceeds to compose myself* I haven’t really heard the other arguments for why it won’t be theirs next and it’ll be another couple’s (no, not E/riel because that is NOT happening). Everyone I know who recently finished ACOSF, have all said damn so what’s gonna happen to Lucien? And Elain? And even Tamlin?! It’s been forever! When are we gonna get an answer?! And this came from a friend who has Az as only second to Rhys on her list of ACOTAR loves. Soooo, it might just be about goddamn time. Imagine SJM announced that she’s gonna release CC3 and ACOTAR 5 back to back! Of course that’s just a delusion but hey!

Xoxo 😘

Good Morning!!!

And right? It's time!! I think I might cry a little if we have yet another book where the characters talk about the end of Vassa's freedom coming to a close soon, Elain still being stand offish toward Lucien, Tamlin not getting better, and Lucien still not knowing who his father is (without those things actually happening). 😂

I kept thinking she was going to surprise us all and announce ACOTAR 5 being released before CC3 but it's looking like that's less likely as the days go on.

These are the main arguments I've heard as to why Elucien's book won't be before Gwynriel's:

Because Elain didn't have a POV. Which is valid but in my opinion, that's because the second we get inside Lucien or Elain's thoughts is the second that all the mysteries are revealed. It was ok for Nesta to feel drawn to Cassian because she was able to hide behind her words and anger to push him away and it still left you wondering what was going to happen. We still didn't know they were Mates. She was also still human for the one so she didn't have all that baggage to deal with. But with Elain, the big points that people debate over are "She's in love with Az! / No she's not!", and "She wants to go back to being human / No she doesn't!", "She hates Lucien which is why she's uncomfortable around him / She's drawn to Lucien and it scares her which is why she's uncomfortable around him", "She's happy in the NC / Elain is trying to convince herself she's happy in the NC!"

The thing with Elain is that she's a mystery. Most of the characters underestimate her and a lot of readers do too. Because she doesn't say much people make a lot of assumptions about her. But....I'm positive Elain mind is a busy place that's going to be an open book and once we're in there, there's no turning back or keeping anything a secret. Az tends to deny things even to himself. Nesta did too. It was ok for us to peek into their minds because they couldn't reveal too much to us when they're not (weren't) even ready to admit certain things to themselves. With Elain, I feel like it's all going to be revealed the second we have her POV which is why I don't think it makes sense for us to get hers until her book. Otherwise we're going to know exactly where things are headed.

Also, Elain wasn't in SF much but if she wasn't in her own sisters book how is she going to play a bigger role in Gwynriels book? I think it's purposeful that Elain isn't shown with the NC members because SJM is selling the narrative that Elain doesn't belong in the NC. The more of a life we see her living and the more she's involved with them, the less sense it makes for her to leave. Not to mention Yrene received her own POV in TOD as a newly introduced character so it really doesn't matter how much Elain has been in the books.

Another argument is that Koschei has to be the Big Bad in the finale because he's a Death God. But wasn't Lanthy's a death god? The Weaver? The Bone Carver? None of these characters were that difficult to take out so I honestly don't see Koschei being the one that can't easily be defeated by Lucien and Elain. I think SJM is building up to another battle in the final spin off series and I think (based on what she said in an interview about how if Bryce was able to arrive on their world, Rhys is going to wonder who else can enter it) that's going to involve other people entering their world. No, the crossovers aren't going to impact each series to the point you're forced to read all her books, they will still operate as a stand alone but she's still going to have to discuss Bryce's arrival in the next ACOTAR book. Which means it still makes portals and "evil" creatures entering their realm possible. Plus we were already told about the "Daglan" in SF so the seeds have been planted that some could make their way back to Prythian.

I think the final argument is that all the hints about Gwynriel's journey have been laid out in SF so that's why theirs will be next. But again, hints for Elucien's journey have been around since ACOMAF and they continued all the way through SF (major ones too, them needing Spring back in shape, Tamlin not getting better, Elain needing to visit Spring, Lucien being stationed there, Lucien and Elain being placed at the continent, Vassa's time running out, Nesta taking the rose carving made for Elain and placing next to a figure of a goddess and Nesta not allowing herself to dwell on why she placed it there, Nesta later taking that carving and placing it on her fathers gravestone on the last page of the series, and the fact that we see Elain finally standing up for herself).

SJM has laid enough hints that she could easily take the story in either direction (Elucien or Gwynriel) but I do think saying it couldn't be Elucien's is easily debated.

[phantomfitzroy]

I got caught and tagged like a wild animal by @cromerholt AND @noellevanious :-) quastions time

Are you named after anyone? Technically yes. When I listened to TAZ:Graduation I was really caught on Fitzroy Maplecourt, Knight in Absentia to the realm of Goodcastle 's name for some reason. Don't get me wrong, Griffin made a very fun character but I really don't associate my attachment to the name to him at all. It was more like inspiration, you know? Also my middle name, Aleksandr, is from an old ass youtuber I used to watch religiously in high school. If you know you know. I still use it as a first name, though, Fitz and Aleks are both good names I will respond to. Fun fact, my best friend called me Aleks through our junior/high school before I knew I was trans. I guess it just stuck.

When was the last time you cried? Yesterday. I watched a vid of an older woman with Alzheimer's talking with her daughter. She repeatedly asked her daughter to stop calling her mom, which did get to me, but what got to me most was her gradually remembering her daughter as the video went on while she looked at old photos and trinkets from her past. It really got to me.

Do you have kids? Nope :-) I fluctuate between not wanting kids and maybe wanting kids. I'm sure I'll have a better idea when I'm older and actually can take care of myself first.

What sports do you play/have you played? I used to play basketball in junior high. Also if you count marching band? Our director had us doing laps around the football field before practice and shit.

Do you use sarcasm? A very hesitant yes. I hardly use it, the closest I could say I get to sarcasm most of the time is just telling silly lies to people, but there's never any ill will behind it ever. I just like seeing what I can get people to believe, but I always let people know I lied after.

What's the first thing you notice about someone? In a physical sense their smile. I'm drawn to people's mouths for some reason. But in a broader sense the first thing I notice is usually the way they interact with other people.

Eye color? Hazel. I've got this cool ring of orangeish gold around my pupils.

Scary movies or happy endings? Depends on the day. I usually like scary movies though. As long as the ending is satisfying, it doesn't have to be happy for me to have enjoyed the experience.

Any talents? I don't like talking myself up but I am pretty good at acting and singing. Admittedly, I think I'm a better singer now than before my voice dropped from HRT.

Where were you born? Midwest. Minnesota. You're not getting anything closer than that, I shant dox myself.

Hobbies? Art. I draw and have been trying to get back into painting. I also technically do theatre as a hobby currently, since I don't get paid for the performances I'm in. And viddy games :-)

Any pets? I do not legally have pets, at least not in my own home, but I consider my dad's dogs my dogs since I take care of them as much (if not more) than they do lmao. Also one of my mom's dogs is technically mine, since I did pay for him when we got him, but I haven't been able to have pets anywhere I've lived since I moved out so he stays with my momma.

Height? 5'4"... I thought I was 5'5" until I was 18 years old.

Favorite school subject? I liked most science classes in school. The graphic design class I took in high school was fuckin awesome. Currently, though, I'm trying to teach myself to code and I'm enjoying that immensely.

Dream job? Professional acting!! Ideally I'd do live theatre, musical or otherwise. But I think I'd also be happy doing film. I would also be very happy as a live theatre director, though I'd need more experience directing first. I would also love love love to be a part of a professional improv troupe. Because I'm a dweeb. And good at improv.

Now I get to tag people. @genderkiller @gravellymistaken @nilovalentine @thesexiestlobster if you guy wanna do this :-) also anyone else who wants to, this was fun smiles

[n4rval]

HI I WAS MENTIONED

i haven't even posted anything about my hcs to the PATIENCE and BRAVERY siblings yet but holy shit you guessed lucas' character spot on ahahahahaha (sweats profusely) (honestly kind of scared)

i will take the opportunity to add some takes on SOULs and magic here if you don't mind

FOLLOWING BELOW: further insight on SOULs and magic, the 6 fallen humans and how their qualities are presented in UNDERTALE's narrative, imagining Wingdings and the laser siblings

For me, it makes more sense for the presentation of white color on a monsters soul have much more to do with their natural MAGIC ABILITY (besides love, hope and compassion). When they use different attack dynamics, they can reach for these values within themselves and exercise the manifestation of it with intent, like when you shine a light on a prism and it breaks down in individual colors.

Humans might not have the innate ability to cast magic spells, as "FLESHLINGS ARE TERRIBLY DEPENDABLE ON THEIR ORGANIC FORMS" (a real quote i was there he really said that), but magic is there, and magic has been learned and used in the past on the casting of the barrier. If DELTARUNE is a valid source to understand these mechanics (high probability), we can see it is possible to increase Kris' magic ability through boosted items – not that the item on its own is magical, but it allows better channeling of a living being's magical potential (if otherwise we'd probably see kris using it, but kris knows no spells so magic boosting items are useless to them so far).

What's with human's coloured souls, then? Well, take the prism. I like to think a soul's colour doesn't necessarily dictate what kind of magic a human would be able to do exclusively, or that they are only that colour — but their most prominent value and by extention, the kind of magic they would be more familiar with as mages. In fact, the way it is possible to shine a different light on another's soul (such as Frisk's) and bring forth these values is evidence of such.

PATIENCE for, well, sit still, will you? As much as the motif sounds like ye olde regular Your Best Friend, it does have its own spice to it! A cheerful energy, like a playful small child who's genuinely happy to see you. I've worked a character around this one; little Prudence's entire run basically consisted of looking pretty and waiting for everyone to take her wherever she needed. When you're small and cute, you've got to know exactly the right time to take an opportunity and make it unscathed. Also, sad monsters sometimes need a little patience.

BRAVERY for facing your issues head on! Get on with it, old man! Lucas is a menace and doesn't shy away from anything, punching through and racing towards his goal. Like a speedrunner. He skips NPC dialogue like a total idiot and gets very lore confused later. Perhaps he would benefit to learn, someday, that giving away some of your time or crying like a baby for help is indeed the bravest thing to do. He is so dorky and I cannot wait to post my designs. Come on, he wears a bandanna with VERY MASCULINE ABS drawn on it (and they're pink). Sad monsters sometimes need a little push forward, a little bravery.

INTEGRITY for remaining true to oneself. A soul that is grounded and very down to earth (not creepy at all), but never gives up on hopes and dreams, always reaching ever higher. Ingrid takes herself and others seriously, and promises mean a great deal to someone with this value. Huh, where have I seen this before?

PERSEVERANCE for clinging on dear life and never letting go, even if all odds are against you. Even if you're slow and out of shape, even if your vision sucks and your glasses are always dirty, even if the cool tortoise grandpa wants nothing to do with you – do your best(pathetically) to persist. Sophie was a klutz, but harbored a curiosity that would creep most people out. She was so insistent on knowing, so keen on her note taking, so terribly questioning that she fell into his creation and shattered- ah, wait, no, that was somebody else. Either way, good luck trying to shake this one off.

You know what else is a perseverance dynamic and I don't see it being pointed out often, if any at all? The KARMA effect. Your stats may suck, but with a neat little trick and a little persistence, you may be able to get what you want. I think of it as the ATK counterpart to the defensive invincibility boost of their items.

KINDNESS for a sweet gesture, especially to those who have hurt you. It takes incredible inner strength to remain kind and forgive, and it may feel self-sacrificing, but one must give kindness to receive kindness. Of course, this doesn't mean taking shit from anyone, but you see that even bitterness can be delicious – and that is how you like to cook your conflicts. Cooking, kindness ... huh, where have I seen this before?

I haven't worked out much around the adventures of the kid I called Andre yet, but he makes some mean breakfast. So good it rivals the spider bake sale!

JUSTICE for a fair game and a thirst for making things right. Bullet hell? Well, they've got bullets too, and they are great for directly countering attacks. You know what they say, the best defense is a great offense. Clover (i think we all just agreed that's their name as a fandom) is confident and has their rights and wrongs very neatly laid out, as well as astoundingly accurate intuition. But you know what's actually interesting about all of this?

That Alphys was the one to cast that light, even though she's not particularly much of a connoisseur of magic arts.

It might just be an uhhh whatever toby moment, but I feel like this adds another interesting layer to Alphys' character and justice's seemingly small role on the UNDERTALE narrative. But we'll talk about her somewhere else.

Anyway, back to the sibling's adventures with the dingus in scene.

I'd like to think if he is involved, the lab is where they are finally reunited and proceed as a duo. I mean, it's not like patience is in a hurry, or that the guy is too enthusiastic about handing over a little kid to the guy who swore war on humanity. Or having a little kid carry the weight of murdering a big sad softie. And now, somehow, there's TWO of them (what a nightmare).

There's the whole lead-up of ooohhh 👻 beware the man who speaks in hands 👻 he's a huge creep and brilliant and everything but he never comes out and he's super weird and spooky good luck talking to him 👻👻👻 and then they enter the dark lab and there's just. this really pathetic blob of sadness with a weird accent and his collection of contrastingly goofy gadgets and gizmos.

At first he's happy. Then he's worried. Then he's afraid, very afraid. Are you SERIOUS? Weren't you some kind of GENIUS?? The siblings together do a great job at pulling him out of that terrible place and aiding him on process loss, with a gentle push and a little bit of patience. They learn a lot with him; about monsters, about magic, about their own strength and how to sync their skills. He makes it a mission to stall them the best he can, until he can maybe talk to Asgore about it, achieve an agreement. Oh, STOP IT, STOP IT, STOP IT! With these ridiculous, pointless gimmicks already! What are you so scared of??

Well, the jig is up. It is both admirable and a little intimidating, how despite their entire journey, despite everything they know now, these kids still wish to try their chances with the King of the monsters. Whether they make it back or not isn't as important as being together. It puts his mind at ease, and for a moment, he thinks he knows the King well enough so that he could hope he would indeed drop the trident and be filled with hope once more, just as they managed to do with him. A hypothesis quickly proved wrong. It takes much more than a little patience and a gentle push to overcome the sheer horror that was the mere idea of ever making it out of these caverns.

The Bravery SOUL. so normal about it Shotout to n4rval's Gaster who got me thinking about the two humans‼️ Stares

(Patience not included as it's just plain good ol 'Your Best Friend' throughout) Why does the theme sound so NERDY. All the other SOULs, even Kindness, sound serious. And it would be logical for Perseverance to sounds like that, but nope: it's Bravery's theme.

When I listen to Kindness' theme, it associates with defending oneself, Perseverance with calculating your next moves, while Justice focuses on the opponent's.

Integrity is hard, its creepiness strays me from my line of thought, but most fitting would be 'attacking'. The dustiness of the tutu doesn't play a role in my choice and it's likely that neither of the humans killed anyone, as it would instill at least some fear into monsters and, y'know', be mentioned at least somewhere. But self-defense is still an option, though! Doesn't have to go as far as murder. Nerdy, and many people have pointed out the presence of Gaster's leitmotif in there.

(The video it's taken from)

And, well, these. Just some silly things. Personally I think Gaster could've dealt with two humans after Chara, namely Patience and Bravery. The Patience and Bravery weren't used for the reason of being excessive (I feel like 4 SOUL modes is enough) and Toby not having ideas about how such a SOUL mode could be even executed (the OVERTIME one has a special place in hell). But if looking at it from an in-universe perspective, what if Gaster utilized the SOUL power for lasers? I think a monster's SOUL combines every human trait in it, making it white. Like RGB. So they can also use colored attacks, which have a unique effect. The Royal Guard uses blue attacks to hinder the movement of their target, or, more specifically, a human. Same goes for sentries like Sans and Papyrus. Woshua uses them so you could stand still and let it cleanse you. Hard to say why Gyftrot would, but hey! It's a personal choice, so why not? Orange attacks are very scarce and only one monster exclusively uses that type of attack, and not a combo. Tthat monster being Pyrope. When it comes to switching between these two, Mettaton uses both because of the lasers prominent in the CORE and Hotland, while also being a robot, which, I suppose, makes the utilization easier. Asgore, unlike Undyne, isn't adamant on his target being still to the point of rendering it immobile, so he uses blue attacks instead like the rest of the Royal Guard, while also mixing them with orange ones to disorient the human. So Sorry is a weird case. They attack you but are also sorry for that. (Asgore-style) ..They're quite the character. Green attacks are self-explanatory. Also got a silly idea: what if, since a monster's SOUL is all traits mixed together, white attacks damage you since that is also applicable to them? If you make an orange and a blue attack into one, then it turns into an attack that damages you upon contact either way. But strong monsters, like the main cast, can turn your SOUL a different color. Which, too, is connected to the fact that a monster SOUL consists of every trait, so it can be any color. I already talked about Undyne above. Sans rarely even fights, but in the one instance that he does, it's the sins weighing on our SOUL. Papyrus views the whole fighting thing differently, so for him it's about the challenge. The art of fighting. The purple and yellow modes are a bit weird, the latter one especially. But Muffet uses the former one over the green one due to her playfulness. The purpose of the yellow mode is hard pin down, because it doesn't inconvenience you in any way. But a SOUL is a SOUL, so naturally, SOUL magic would affect them as well. The yellow mode could be used to aid monsters and allow them to get more precise hits? My point is, monsters using either of these (colored attacks and SOUL modes) is natural. What Gaster did was to use that power a bit differently, fusing it with technology.

I feel like Bravery stayed with Gaster for a bit longer than Patience, hence the amount of connections. But if we're going off of Flowey's order of the six SOULs, Patience died first. Bravery dies shortly afterwards. Very reminiscent of the Dreemurrs, isn't it? Ouch. Imagine searching for them and finding out that you arrived a bit late to the scene. Gaster, probably: human...... i know your BRAVE.

[hobipaint]

Graffiti and Chalk- two

summary: You thought you knew him. You thought him gone. Kim Taehyung was part of you that you had carefully suppressed, keeping his memories to one box near the wall of your mind. That was your fault, though - empty walls demand for art. And who other than your own neighbourhood vandal?

↳ pairing: ex police student turned vandal! taehyung x officer! female reader

↳ genres: angst, fluff

↳ word count: 9.6K

↳ disclaimers: pg15!, vandalism, police officers, criminal past and heavy discussion of it, mentions of character deaths.

one | two

a/n: FINALLY AFTER A MONTH IT'S HERE! This took me really long to write but I'm pretty satisfied with how it turned out : it's my longest work yet, and I feel like it would be among my best as well hehe. a massive thank you to @kookiestarlight because i swear i completed this in the first place because of tasha, @swcetnight who pointed out exactly where I need to elaborate stuff and places in which I was loosing parts of the plot because did I forget the whole storyline while writing this 🤡, @vaekth because this bby is absolutely amazing. she's supported me throughout the process of writing this, thank you so much!! thank you to @taecup-fics for beta reading this at the last minute and pointing out a bunch of grammatical errors because otherwise this would be a mess to read 😭 to everyone who has waited - I'm so sorry that it came this late, I suddenly had a bunch of exams that were announced and had to focus on those. Hopefully this lives up to your expectations!! Enjoy reading :)

Morning often dawns with a feeling of hope. With wistful sights of sunrise. Flowers open up to the golden haze that thaws the frost of the night. Birds roam the skies that had been but mysterious domains in the dark. People wake up with groans about the impending day, hopeful for it to end soon. You hoped for your mornings to always be similar to this- some constants were needed in places where you had cases as bewildering as missing pumpkin plushies piling up in your office. 

Your morning today, though, was much different. Much to your annoyance. 

You held the coffee you had brewed for yourself - another espresso, the universe knows you needed it - and handed one to Taehyung just as the cuckoo perching on the clock shrilly announced that it was eight in the morning. 

"Do you still have no answers for me, Y/N?" Taehyung looked at you. His eyes were sullen - no signs of the cheekiness that had peeked at you last night. Scattered rays fell across his body, highlighting the sunken cheeks, brooding eyes and tight smiles you could now see better in the daylight. 

You sighed- probably for the millionth time this night. "I do not understand your question, Taehyung." 

"You remember it. I've asked you thrice since I saw you again, Y/N. Do you not remember anymore? Do you not care for me? Was our idea of us nothing for you?" He looked at you with a myriad of emotions written all over his face- you looked away, not wanting to see them. 

Sighing, you gathered your thoughts the best you could. "Like I said, Taehyung." You looked at him- looking at the person you once fell in love with. The feeling you felt today, though, was much different. There was a feeling of running towards him, taking him in your arms and remembering who he was to you all over again, but it was overwhelmed by the confusion you felt - should you prioritize a past that wanted answers, or a future that was unsure? For now, you chose none pushing the time to make that decision further ahead. "We were an 'us' for only a few hours. Until you stood me up."

He rolled his eyes."That wasn't intentional, Y/N." 

"And how was I supposed to know that, Taehyung? I thought it was, since you had never told me anything beforehand."

Taehyung's eyebrows bunched together, as if coming to hear the stories that his eyes longed to tell- stories of events that you had never seen and never known. "Would you not hear me out, even once? For the sake of our old love?"

You bristled. "What love, Taehyung?" You got up to stretch your legs out, looking at the patchwork blanket that was stuffed in the corner. You had taken that for your first date with Taehyung, planning to cuddle with him and watch the stars - a date that never happened. "What love? A love where you don't speak to me for weeks, and then vanish for some crime? We were young then, and I got hurt then as it is. There's no need to go over this right now." 

"That was not my fault, Y/N. You know that." Taehyung seemingly sunk back into his chair, eyes downcast. "I had said I loved you. Before I ever went out with you." 

"Like that matters,” you scoffed, “what's the point in reminiscing promises from an old love?"

"At least, hear me out?" He looked up at you with hope sprinkled in the abyss of his eyes. "I don't want you to forget me."

You turned back to your chair, tearing your eyes away from the blanket that was now a pale blue in the sunlight - a few shades lighter than the cerulean colour it would be in the afternoon. "Not now, Taehyung." 

Taehyung sighed, looking at the floor, tension exhaled into the room. He sat silently for a few seconds, the ticking clock announcing each moment clearly to you. "That's fair. It's just.." He looked back at you. "I'm used to thinking of you as the person I loved." He nervously let his eyes pan around the windows, gazing at the sunshine that streamed through the window, before turning back towards your gaze. "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable, I'm just really grateful for your presence-" 

"Taehyung." You sharply interrupted him. "Two years ago, when your case was reopened for investigation. Who did that?" 

"They told me that it was a well wisher in the neighbourhood. Another jailor said it was for good behaviour." He shrugged. 

You scoffed aloud, more loudly than you would have liked him to hear. 

He frowned, lips drawn in a tight line in annoyance. "Don't believe me? I'll have you know, Y/N, I was among the most well behaved at prison. Absolutely no tantrums. I even ate the salt-less, disgusting food they'd give there. No crying. Nothing. I can show you later on if you want, I think I have a report stuffed somewhere here," He got up, shuffled towards his bag and checked the last zip, hunting for a report you had never heard of. 

"It was me." 

Taehyung whirled around to face you, unruly hair swinging like the seats of a carousel at a carnival, and raised an eyebrow. "What were you?" 

"I was the one who insisted on opening the case for reinvestigation, the case of your stepfather's assault. Went around collecting evidence, searching for people who knew about your family better, getting their voices recorded, finding about the whole deal to frame you and stuff. Nearly got fired." You shrugged, sipping your espresso and wincing- too bitter. "You're welcome, by the way. The coffee is getting cold." 

"I don't care about the coffee." He moved the cup aside - nearly spilling the liquid, roughly settling back into the seat he had been occupying for the last few hours. "You were the one who asked for re-opening the case?" 

"Just said that." 

He slumped back in his seat, and your eyes took in how he spread himself out on the chair, tiredness lacing his figure. "I didn't know that." 

"Now you do." You said, sipping your coffee and watching Taehyung do the same. 

Taehyung stared blankly at you, and you couldn't fathom what was swirling in those ebony orbs of his. "Why did you do that, Y/N?"

"Honestly," you smile softly at him, "I was expecting a thank you."

"You should have expected questions, Y/N. Why did you help me?" Taehyung's blank expression made way for a confused one, eyebrows furrowing and lips pouting. 

"I did what I had to do as a-" You paused here, unsure of what to say. "As a friend, Taehyung, nothing more. I knew you were innocent-"

"How were you so assured?" He pressed on."I could be a complete 180 from the man I met you as. I could be fake. I could be an impostor. I could-"

"You could do a bunch of things, Taehyung." You stared him straight in the eye, trying to keep your emotions at bay. "But you could never tell a lie." 

Taehyung scoffed. "You sound like one of the wishy-washy pick-me kind of girls in the movie. No, I don't lie, but I could." 

You sighed. As much as you cared for Taehyung, you had never really cared for his argumentative attitude. "I went with the assumption that you were the same person I knew, Taehyung. The one whom I respected and trusted. I acted on that feeling." 

"That wasn't trust, Y/N. It was naivety. You were naive to believe me." Taehyung paused, uncertainty lining his forehead as he spoke. "You shouldn't have trusted me." 

You rolled your eyes- you couldn't understand why he was so desperate to make sure that you remained aloof from him. What had you done to be treated like that? What had he done to force everyone away from him? 

You tried to play off his remaining doubts and frustrations as insecurities he developed while in jail, and moved on."Alright then, you impostor. I was naive to trust you. And even more naive to believe you. Happy? Now shush. I don't want to talk about this." You tried to clear your mind of any doubts you had about Taehyung, but his behaviour, the way he interacted with you - it couldn't help but increase the worry and confusion in your mind.

Taehyung leaned forward to look you in the eye before smiling softly at you - you couldn't understand why. You were going to give him a criminal record, maybe arrest him. You were potentially ruining his life again, and he smiled at you. "If you say so, officer." Taehyung said, settling into the chair - leaving your mind reeling with questions you weren't sure you wanted the answers to. 

You opened the laptop again, wearily. "Let's get back to the questions; the sooner we finish this, the better. Where did you source the paint from?" 

"You mean the graffiti? And chalk?" You nodded. Taehyung sighed."Terminology, Officer, terminology. Make no errors." He raised a finger to wave at you, as if to say no. You rolled your eyes -it seemed that you were the only one concerned about what would happen to him after this, because Taehyung quite clearly was not. "I bought it with the allowance money that was kept for me in the bank- as much as I hated that man, his cards proved to be useful."

You raised an eyebrow, skeptical. "You didn't steal it." 

"No. Took it from my step-father's account. Technically, now mine. Apparently he left everything to his children, and I'm the only one alive that I know of. Maybe he had other children- I wouldn't doubt it for a moment if he had, but that doesn't change my right to his money either." 

"Any other members of your family who had been granted access to that account?" You asked, wanting to make sure that there were no loopholes - you didn't want a future possibility of Taehyung being entangled with the wrong side of the law again. 

He rolled his eyes, leaning further. "Curious little thing, aren't you? Like I'd told you last night, most of them are dead. Mom had died a few months before I was arrested - thanks to my stepfather being an alcoholic and taking everything out on her. Grandmother already had massive health issues - she passed away after two years of me being in jail - they had let me come out for her funeral."

"My siblings - a brother and sister, if you remember - were taken in by a distant relative, and the last time I spoke to them was three years ago. I'm not allowed to contact them because I might end up being a 'bad influence'," he air quoted the words, laughing mirthlessly. "Guess they won't be too delighted to see me again. You probably know about my stepfather - got drunk and passed out. Permanently. But yeah, that's all. I'm pretty much the sole benefactor from that account."

Hearing how nonchalantly he spoke about it, you were forced to maintain a strong face and be professional. You couldn't possibly think of even wanting to comfort him in any way. "So, you were absolutely not stealing."

"Nope. No. Not at all. Want any further repetitions?" 

"That won't be necessary," You said, having typed out the information - tracking his expenditures would also be necessary now, apparently. "Any expenditure you make shall be monitored, now. Be careful."

"Always have been." He chuckled, getting back to spinning the glass on the table. "You know me." 

You ignored him. "Your cards will be tracked, and any loose cash will be checked by us. If we feel that there's any room for suspicion, you will have reason to be monitored." 

An odd silence filled the room while you tapped away at your laptop, filling in more details about the incident. Taehyung would be having a criminal record again, you thought to yourself. It was the only thought that echoed in your mind. It made you feel uneasy in a way, but you swallowed your unease down. There's a promotion to focus on. 

"Taehyung, something has been bugging me since I caught you vandalising." You shifted a little bit, before deciding to spit out the question. "Why did you do it?" You leaned forwards on the table, elbows digging into the wood as you tried to grasp the answers from him. 

Taehyung looked you in the eyes, and then looked away. "I don't know."

"You don't know." You raised your eyebrows, leaning back incredulously. "Taehyung, that's not an answer." 

"I did it because I wanted to. It was fun. I'd see kids in the morning pointing at my graffiti work and they would like it. There would be people claiming it looked good. I felt acknowledged and I just-" He pleaded, unable to continue without pausing to recollect his calm. "I felt like doing it. After years of having questions raised at me for committing a crime I never did, I finally had people talking about the work I did. Even if it was just chalk drawings." 

You exhaled in confusion. The Taehyung you had known - he was never like this. Confident, assured, independent. That was what he seemed to you when you were younger. And now, to see him want to be validated by others who never even cared for him- it felt ridiculous to you. Why was his only way of feeling validated involving something against the law? "Okay, then." 

You went through the complaints that had been registered against him, hand resting against your forehead as you asked him the most commonly asked question. "Why the insignia 'V'?" 

"V for victory?" He made a 'V' sign with his fingers, "I liked to think that I won against the world by rebelling against its sense of black and white. I saw everyone talk about it, and I felt like the same people who had once pointed fingers at me, blaming me for something I hadn't done, were now pointing fingers at something I had done - I felt victorious. I didn't need to show myself and possibly want more than I had already let myself have - this was enough for me." 

You pulled your lips in a tight line, and hummed in response - there were two places that together had put in about twenty complaints, so you had to respond to all of them. You kept reminding yourself that neither did you have the space to feel sorry for him, nor did you have the power to say sorry to him. You simply kept your head turned to the screen, typing in answers to all the complaints. 

Taehyung leaned forward after a few seconds. "What punishment do you think I'll get, Officer?" 

"If the chief is feeling good, maybe you'll get community service, with a fine," You looked up at him. "Or maybe some time in jail." 

"How much time?"

"Maybe a month or two?" 

"Oh." Taehyung slumped back into his seat nonchalantly. "Cool then." 

How was he this calm? You thought to yourself. He might be going to jail. For a second time.

"Yup." You shut the laptop, finally, after hours of typing information and recording it. Sighing, you lifted the porcelain mug once again to absolutely drain it of coffee, your rather loud gulps echoing in the silence of your office. 

Taehyung tapped his fingers on the table- probably some old tune he had learnt before. You remembered that he played the saxophone - from nights of serenading tunes that he had played for you with his beloved instrument. "How long do you think the chief will take to reach here?" 

"A few hours, maybe? I'd expect him around ten, to be honest. Nevertheless, let me check." You quickly called the chief on your phone, hearing his ringtone play some old Korean trot song before it was picked up. 

"Hello, yes, yes, Y/N. I expected your call." A gravely, rather rough voice responded to you- like it hadn't been used for a few hours. "I shall be reaching the office around eleven. Keep Taehyung with you." 

"Yes sir," you said, keeping the phone on your table and turning to Taehyung.  "The chief said he'll be here by eleven." 

Taehyung nodded in acknowledgement. 

"It's nearly eight thirty now." You looked at the cuckoo clock again. "Would you like to freshen up?" 

"Where?" Taehyung asked, eyes widening. "Shouldn't I just be at the office?" 

"Yeah, you should. My place is right here- the back of this office is where I live, so you'll be fine." You look down at his clothes, grease, paint and metal shrapnel all over them. "Besides, you look like you need a change of clothes." 

Taehyung stepped into your house with an air of curiosity, to see how his once classmate was living. His head stooped low to enter through the small door you had, eyes widening in surprise when he found that the hall of your house was larger than he had anticipated. 

The house was quaint, a hall with an old couch which doubled as a bed when needed. There was a table in the middle of the room, too low to be a dining table and too high to be a center table. For coffee, maybe? There were maybe five or six magazines scattered haphazardly over it, covering nearly every inch- except for one corner, where Taehyung spotted a shining acrylic blue. 

You, however, spotted what page you had left a magazine open at. Squeaking, "I'm sorry!" you ran to shut the booklet close, afraid that Taehyung would spot your love for shirtless men. 

Picking up the magazines, you grinned sheepishly at him. "Just a moment! I'll be back, a bit of cleaning to be done, sit right here!" You patted the couch, trying to convince Taehyung. 

Taehyung turned away from the pictures he had been observing- was there one of you both? - and nodded, eyes widening in surprise as he saw how you scuttled away to hide the magazines. He looked around again, taking a feel of your house- it seemed like the old you. There was some patchwork embroidery you had left in a corner, atop what seemed to be a showpiece? Taehyung stepped closer to see it in detail, and was amazed at the way you had managed to drag the red thread over and over the pink fabric to make floral designs. It reminded him of the rose he had been trying to complete the previous night, and he grit his teeth. He shouldn't be thinking about that now. That shouldn't be what he does anymore. No more.

You came back, looking quizzically at him. "Take a seat, Taehyung! It's alright." 

"Uh, yeah." He shuffled over to the couch again. "Did you make that?" 

You looked in the direction his finger pointed to. "Yeah. Tried doing embroidery for stress release purposes." 

Taehyung grinned at you. "Stress release?" He asked, bemused. 

"Yup." You said while making sure that the magazines were well hidden. "The department I wanted to be in was forensics, you know?" Taehyung nodded, he had been privy to most of your discussions about the advances in forensic technology and analysis - even if he didn't understand anything, he knew your love for it. "Well, they didn't allow me. So the whole 'stress' thing began." You walked back to him, making air quotes as you emphasized on stress. "My mother suggested embroidery would take my mind off it. So, that incomplete piece you see there?" Taehyung nodded, concentrating on every word that left your mouth. "That started a few days ago." 

"It looks like it's complete, though- are you really good at it?" Taehyung looked at you again, turning back from the embroidery you were now rising to get. 

"Pretty much? It's easy once you get the hang of it." 

"Ah." Taehyung said, a dull silence settling into the room for a few moments as Taehyung looked around your room.  

"That picture." He pointed, and you turned your head around. The picture he was focusing on was on your mantelpiece, resting happily. The frame had butterflies stuck on its corners, two large and two small. The border was white, now off white, and had pink dots in certain places. It was a picture of fireworks- red, yellow and blue mixing together in a dull sky to breathe life into the picture. And right in the middle, surrounded by this liveliness, were you and Taehyung. Beaming. 

Taehyung turned to, finger still pointing at the picture. "That's our picture, right?" 

You hummed in affirmation. "That's us, freshman party. We had known each other for a few weeks at this time."

"And I had stopped someone from asking you out, right?" Taehyung reminisced. "That was fun." 

You snort. "You had punched him in the face when he asked for my name, Taehyung." 

Taehyung smiled. "I didn't want anyone to harm you, Y/N, and he seemed like he would harm you." He spread out his arms and grinned smugly at you. "In a way, I rescued you. That night." 

And so many other nights, you wanted to say. For all the time you had known Taehyung, he had been fiercely protective of you - for reasons he never truly told you. You didn't question it either, basking in the feeling of being wanted by someone. 

You cleared your throat, hoping to clear your mind as well. "You should go take a shower, Taehyung." Glancing at the clock, you noted the time and motioned towards the washroom. "It's nearly nine. Go take a shower, call for me if you need anything. I'll go get some clothes for you."

Taehyung nodded, rising up slowly to go in the direction you pointed. "Towels are inside," you shouted after him, and he yelled in response to say he understood. In some ways, too many ways, he felt like the Taehyung you once knew. 

You went to your room to pick out some clothes, opening your meager collection to salvage something that would fit Taehyung. Your eyes scanned over your uniforms, jumpsuits, jeans, t-shirts and finally landed on the hoodies- probably the largest collection in your wardrobe. Thankfully, you loved large, loose hoodies. You started pulling them out, holding each one up and imagining Taehyung's proportions in them. 

The red one, with blue paw prints. "Nah. Too tight." 

The black plain one. "That's mine, I'm not sharing that." 

The grey ones- nearly three. You skipped over all of them, not understanding how none of these oversized hoodies would seemingly fit Taehyung. He'd gotten humongous, broad shoulders and everything. 

You picked out a few more, trying to see whether it would be a fit. None worked. 

When you picked up the next one, you could already picture him wearing it. It was the hoodie you had taken from Taehyung during the first year you knew each other. You looked at its loose sleeves, stretchy from you tugging Taehyung behind you with it way back then. The green fabric of the hoodie was slightly pale in a certain spot - you had spilled soda all over him in a fit of anger.

During your forensic chemistry class,  the teacher didn't recognise their mistakes in the procedure (they used the wrong test for detecting the sample, and blamed it on you), and you were pretty miffed the whole day. Taehyung had bought sodas for the two of you, having planned to go stargazing later on. And you, in a terrible mood, flipped him off in a way that had the soda spilling over him. You cried, Taehyung laughed, but the hoodie was still stained. You took it with you later on to clean it - but the stubborn stain never left. You were agonized, Taehyung amused, but the hoodie- it was still stained. Taehyung had laughed it off, telling you to keep it with you for as long as you wanted- he could buy a dozen more hoodies to last him till then. 

When you left to head home that winter break, you had taken the hoodie with you. You had taken it on your date, crying on its sleeves when you were stood up. And when you came back, Taehyung was suddenly a criminal. 

You shook your head to remove the memories of that time, holding the hoodie in your hand and gently caressing its sleeves. So many memories were held in these threads that meshed together to form the fabric of your youth. Good or bad? You didn't want to dwell on that. 

"Y/N? Could I get the clothes now?" Taehyung called from the washroom. You picked up a extra large pair of cotton shorts and a hoodie, and passed it to him without really thinking- you'd done it before when he got drunk at college too, having him come over at your place, shower, change, and practically behave like a couple- at least, that's what you had thought of it then. 

Get it together, Y/N, why are you thinking about that? 

"Thanks!" he shouted again, grasping the clothes with his fingers and whisking them away to the confines of the washroom. 

You gripped at your hair and pinched your cheeks. You couldn't keep thinking about the old Taehyung. You didn't know if it was truly him anymore. 

"Uh, Y/N?" Taehyung stepped out of the washroom, the previously oversized shorts clinging to his thighs for dear life and the hoodie snugly fitting his figure. "I think it's a bit tight, but I'll make do." 

Your eyes widened in horror; Taehyung looked like he was moments away from bursting the shorts. "I'll get you new pants, wait a second. These ones don't fit." 

You turned back to your cupboard, looking for the loosest bottoms you could find. "I think the hoodie still fits though, right?" 

"Yeah." You heard Taehyung right over your shoulder, scaring you. 

"Jeez, when did you get this close to me?" You turned to face him, crossing your arms, looking at his hair which still had droplets sticking to its edges. 

"When did you get this far from me, Y/N?" His eyes bore into yours, sweetly intense eyes gazing at you like it was the first time he saw you. "What happened?" 

You shrugged, not wanting to answer it. You picked up a loose pair of denim jeans that you had found stuffed away at the back of your closet. Pushing it into his hands, you told him to go change. 

Apparently, your instructions fell on deaf ears. "What happened, Y/N? Answer me. Please."

You moved your gaze to his clothes, not wanting to focus on the thoughts that rushed back when you thought of him. What had happened? You moved your hands to your sides, resisting the need to hold him and know him all over again. "The hoodie looks good on you. Would you-" 

"So do our hands." He held yours, snugly fitting his palm- your calloused fingers against his calloused ones, heat burning in the sleeping embers of your palm. His eyes gazed at the joint fingertips almost reverently. "They fit well."

"Taehyung, now is not the time-" You begin, cut off by his frantic breathing.

"When is the time, Y/N? When will I get to live? When will I get to feel like a human? When will I be innocent?"

His hand caressed your palm, touching your forearm, your elbow, your shoulder, and your cheek -leaving a burning trail behind him everywhere he touched. You shivered. "Do you know how long I have wanted you, Y/N? Years. Seven years, now. I have loved you for years. I have wanted you for years. I did all sorts of things to remember you while in jail- kept asking for you, kept calling for you. I didn't want to forget you, Y/N. Not you. I couldn't forget you, no." 

He pressed your palm to his chest, and you could feel a dull thump echo through the clothes, reverberate in your palms. "That fire, Y/N. My passion in the promises I'd made to you. It never went anywhere. I always loved you. I always will. You can't make me leave again, not again. Please, no." 

He held your palm up to his cheeks, not regarding the tears that were streaking your cheeks and his. "You feel me, right? It's me. Taehyung. I am the one you trusted. I'm the same. Trust me again. Please." 

You tried to hold back the tears that threatened to slide down your cheeks, not wanting to pain Taehyung anymore. He held your forehead to his, pressing on the back of your head to meet his - upclose, you could see the redness that clouded the shine that his eyes would normally have. You couldn't hold back your tears anymore, nearly whimpering when you saw how broken he was- sirens swimming in the whirlpool of his eyes, singing songs of misery. "You know me, right? Do you know me? Do you recognize me? Kim Taehyung, police cadet. Your friend. Your classmate. You know me, right?" He asked, nose nearly brushing yours. "Do you know me?"He cried, eyes washing over the fire that ignited behind his pupils. You didn't see a vandal, or a criminal, or a friend. You saw a broken man. 

"Taehyung, oh, Tae," you cried, putting your hands on his shoulders, watching him slink down to the ground as his body trembled and shivered. You wrapped your arms close around his figure, unable to understand his pain but just wanting it to go away. 

You sat like that for a while, coaxing the tears and short whimpers out of him as he held onto your fingers, wanting to remember something he once had: you. 

"I always asked for you, you know that?" Taehyung shivered as he spoke, even if the chills of the weather outside barely seeped into your home. "I always loved you. I don't know why they kept me there for so long, Y/N. I didn't do anything wrong. I don't know why I'm made to feel like this…" he trailed away, tears gathering at his chin as they endlessly flowed down his cheeks. 

You glanced a nervous eye at the clock, wanting to make sure that you get to the station- no matter what happens. The bubbling of water distracted you from the ticking of the clock, and you turned off the stove. Scouring your cabinets for a chamomile tea bag was hard, but you knew you needed it. Taehyung always seemed to calm down with tea - you had used it multiple times before. Times of which you have multiple memories. Times you wish to forget. 

Why did I ever love Taehyung? The question kept echoing in your mind as you leaned on top of the kitchen counter top. Things would have been so much simpler if simply looking at him wasn't so hard. His smile, his behaviour, his tears - it was all but a painful reminder of what you could have been if things had gone different. If only. 

You poured the hot water into the mug you had settled on the kitchen top, watching the water bloom into a serene shade of yellow as you dipped the tea bag into it repeatedly. You prepared one mug, then another, hearing the soft declarations Taehyung kept repeating while he was seated. 

All you had wanted to study was forensic science, and that was simply for one reason: you didn't want to interact with people. 

People are complicated, over emotional beings. and you couldn't help but feel helpless every time you had to encounter a suspect. You would constantly be told by your professors to see them as lawbreakers - but all you tried finding was signs of humanity in them. That even the most vicious killers had scope for reform. That's why you stuck to the subjects you wanted - you were good at finding signs of life, not squashing them. You consistently failed those classes, without any doubt. And today, it seemed like all those classes were laughing at you. 

"Here." You handed the mug to Taehyung, who muttered thanks. He rubbed his hands once or twice on the pants you told him to change into and took a sip from the warm tea. You resisted the urge to reach out and wipe the tears that lined his face, and try and wipe the scars of the past that had scarred him so badly - but you couldn't. You were a mere spectator in the game of his life. You couldn't possibly do anything other than hurt him more. 

"Thank you. For letting me express all of it. I could finally say everything that I wanted to before I was forbidden from speaking about it again." Taehyung tapped against the mug, fingernails resting on ceramic as the sun slowly headed westward. "I'm sorry that I've been such a burden to you, Y/N. I wonder if I can do anything to reduce the pain and confusion I put you through - I doubt I can." He looked at you carefully, though you couldn't tell what he was thinking. "Thank you." 

You let his words echo in the room, preoccupied with your thoughts. It hurt you to see him so broken, and you couldn't help but worry about him. 

"Taehyung, I-" You opened your mouth to respond, watching Taehyung pay attention to every move you made - only to be interrupted by your phone loudly ringing. 

"Sorry, this must be important." You got up to get your phone, watching Taehyung slump in his seat from the edge of your vision. 

"It's the chief," you announced, picking up the phone. 

He got straight to the point. "Come to the station, soon. Bring Taehyung with you." he told, his voice laced with a rather sharp edge- a tone that you had recognized in the years you had worked under him. Things were- most probably- not good. 

You responded with a simple "yes", mind dwelling on the impending result that Taehyung would get. You felt that it would be unlikely that he would be going to jail- at least, you hoped so.

Turning to Taehyung, you tried to hide the fear and shakiness that lined your voice. "Let's go." 

Taehyung sighed, playing with the mug as he rose up. "It's time, isn't it?"

"Good morning, Sir." You greeted the chief as he hurried into the small office, giving Taehyung a glance and then facing you. 

"Morning." He gruffly responded, turning to your laptop. "We found an eyewitness for the vandalism, so we are getting them for the interrogation as well." 

"Another interrogation? We've already done it, sir, and all the information is recorded here. I doubt it will be necessary-"

"Please, Y/N," He calmly said. "Leave the decision about it being necessary to me." 

You stepped back, subconsciously edging closer to Taehyung - a move noticed by the chief as well. 

"Y/N," he began, "I need to speak to you. In private. Step outside for a few moments, please." 

You nodded, briskly walking towards the doors and yanking them open. There was a warm gust of wind that blew across your face, and you turned to face the chief. 

"Y/N," the chief began, before pausing for a moment, "Officer Y/N. I'm going to need you to think clearly now." 

"Yes." You set your features as tightly as you could, not wanting to seem distracted in any way. 

"Do you have any type of bias in this case, perhaps due to your past relation with him?" he looked quizzically at you, as if trying to decipher an enigma scribbled onto your face. 

Your blood chilled, for some reason. Were you having any bias? "No, sir." 

The chief hummed - you couldn't make head or tail of his reaction. He kicked at a pebble before continuing. "From the recordings I heard the previous night in the office, and the way you let him come with you to freshen up a bit, one particular thing has struck me: you were trying to find reasons for Taehyung to be justified as a victim, weren't you?" 

You gulped before responding. "Yes, sir. I believe the culprit committed vandalism as a coping mechanism to get over the hurt caused over the years." 

The chief sighed heavily. "Well then," he said, "I suggest we continue with our investigation, and find a way to make sure the culprit in the matter is stable as well. We can't have repeated cases like these - we have a reputation to uphold for the police as well." 

You nodded stiffly. "Yes, sir." 

The chief sighed again, glancing at the street. "Our witness should be here soon." He turned to you again. "Funnily enough, she volunteered as a witness with CCTV backup to claim that Taehyung had vandalized her shop too. Apparently she heard you arrest him last night - so we have to hear her out." 

The chief turned again to the road, eyes narrowing in hopes of spotting the witness soon. "The investigator whom she contacted has said she is a reliable witness, but I'm going to need to verify her statement nonetheless." He turned back, heading into the office.

You stared at the road that the chief was looking at before - the direction from which the supposedly reliable eyewitness would come, before heading back inside. 

Taehyung was still slumped in his seat, fingers tracing drawings all over the pants you had given him. The chief was shuffling around behind the desk, pulling two spare chairs ahead - one for Taehyung, you presumed, and one for the eyewitness - whoever that would be. 

"Mr. Kim Taehyung," the chief began, "there has been an eyewitness who has offered their testimony - whether it is to defend you, or further establish evidence of you vandalizing public spaces, I'm not yet aware. We shall be interrogating them - and maybe you, as well, now." 

Taehyung rose up from the corner he had settled into, and shuffled into the seat the chief had set for him, wordlessly. 

The door opened to reveal an older lady, dressed in a purple shaded hanbok, hair delicately pulled back into a tight bun and eyes peering around the whole office in curiosity. She found the chief, walking closer to the desk where he was arranging the records. "I'm here as the eyewitness..?"She said, looking at both you and the chief. 

"Ah, yes. I presume you're Ms. Park?" The chief asked, pulling the chair out for her to settle into it. Under the light that shined across her face, you could make out the wrinkles that lined her skin and the greys in her hair - not that that was relevant to what would happen. 

"I saw him vandalize the outside of my store a few days ago," she earnestly began, pulling out pictures that she had taken of the design on her window.  "I'm a florist, you see. His designs are clearly inspired by that, aren't they?" She pushed the pictures in front of your vision, and you could see what she meant - the designs of orchids, hibiscus and asters stared back at you, intricately painted onto the glass windows of the florist's shop. 

She pulled out more pictures. "There's been similar instances all over the neighbourhood- the other florist had a rose, the school received drawings full of children's stories and fairy tales, and had their walls painted with similar stories. In fact, the restaurants around here even said that their menus were drawn onto the streets, right in front of their doorstep." 

The chief looked at the pictures carefully, with you peering at them as well, taking in the detail that Taehyung had while he worked while making each of his works- no, vandalising, you corrected yourself. He raised an eyebrow at the eyewitness, who seemed to shrink into her seat. "What does this bring forward as evidence for or against the culprit? We already know what the crime is, and its details. We just have to determine a punishment- either a hefty fine or jail. Do you have anything that can justify him getting exempted from either?"

Ms. Park looked at you and the chief before turning to Taehyung apologetically, placing a hand on his knee - as if consoling him. "I think that at the end of the day, all he was doing was beautifying the neighbourhood, wasn't he? And most of the residents here don't have a problem with it-" the chief looked at her incredulously- "so please, don't punish him or something. A lot of people appreciate his work in our neighborhood, you know?" 

"But we have been receiving complaints about him since the past few days," the chief said. "Why the sudden change in opinion?"

Ms. Park fidgeted with the hem of her hanbok for a few moments, shaking her head nervously. "Some of us shopkeepers were really bothered by it at first, yes, but we also had some customers come over to inquire about the artwork. It looked professional to them. So we came to an ultimatum : we will let this young man paint and draw for us, on our walls, as much as he wants - as long as it's pretty," she emphasized, one hand patting her chest, "we'll pay him to do it." 

You held back a sob as you saw Taehyung's eyes glimmer - a ray of hope shining in them.His knee bounced up and down- a habit you knew was something he had had since years - and he smiled softly when Ms. Park squeezed his hand. You felt like things were finally going to go well. The chief exhaled roughly before rubbing his forehead, glancing at Ms. Park, who smiled at him in the hope that he would understand her reasoning. 

"The law, honestly, doesn't care about intentions- I don't think I really understand why I should even let him go. Vandalism is a punishable offence, and the perpetrator has been aware of its consequences. Why the sudden feeling to save him?" The chief questioned, eyes steely and tough. 

Ms. Park hesitated for a few moments. "I believe he deserves a second chance." She pulled her chair ahead, the metal ends scraping against the tiles, and pleaded once again. "He was arrested for years for something he hadn't even done - and now, might face a few more months in the same place for simply being artistic. I don't think it deserves punishment."

"That's for the law to decide, not you, madam." The chief sternly said. "I suggest you leave such decisions to us."

The room remained tense and quiet for the next few moments, and your eyes were trained on Taehyung. You noticed the quiver in his hands, the way he shrunk into his chair - as if to hide away from whatever the upcoming decision would be. 

Ms. Park was the first to interrupt the loud silence. "Oh, come on. Let me just pay for the boy's bail." 

The clock chose that moment to loudly announce the next hour: was it eleven? Twelve? You weren't paying attention. You only saw the way Taehyung rose up from his seat - in happiness, you thought - with fists sticking to his sides. "No. I won't accept it." 

You felt the chief look with just as much disbelief as you did. Why was he so hellbent on being a perpetrator when he could be free? 

Ms. Park laughed. "No. I'm not listening to that whole self righteous thing that you probably have," she swatted the air with her hand, as if to push away any explanations Taehyung could give.

"Look, ma'am. I have the money to get a bail, or even pay the fine. I don't want you to pay for me and then hold it above my head like a massive favour you have done for me." Fire blazed in his eyes as he spoke up, rather indignantly. "I can take care of myself." 

"To hell with that attitude," Ms. Park said. "I decided to help you because I didn't want you to suffer once again because of misunderstandings." She pulled Taehyung back to sit on his chair, clasping his hand between her wrinkled ones. "You had to go through so much pain at such a young age - no one deserves that. I was a mere bystander at the time you were arrested, and I regretted it then. I still regret it now." 

She sighed before caressing the back of his hand lovingly, thumb gently pressing on the skin- as if to feel the pain those hands had to go through, and you thought you saw a hint of a tear on his cheeks. "So don't question me for 'saving' you, or something - what you did was perfectly fine for me. I love the way my street looks now, and so do the neighbours. All that really remained was the artist's identity- and now that I know it's you, I don't feel any sort of guilt in justifying what you did." 

You were right. Taehyung was crying. It wasn't silent tears that rained gently down his cheeks, it was a whole thunderstorm. You saw the chief turn away, from the corner of your vision, but you couldn't bring yourself to do the same. He was biting on his bottom lip to hold back any of the sobs or whimpers that came, head lowering to hide the tears. 

Ms. Park simply caressed his hand, over and over, till he calmed down enough to wipe his tears with his free hand. And when he raised his head up, you saw him like a new person. The wound up Taehyung you had met again a few hours ago was slowly vanishing - in his stead, there was a free Taehyung who smiled like the world's burden had been lifted off his shoulders. "Thank you," he murmured. 

The chief sighed again. "I still don't understand how it came to this." 

"Neither do I," Ms. Park laughed. "But it is what it is. We'll pay the fine."

"I'll do it," Taehyung started, only to be shushed by the elder lady. "I want to do it. Let me do it." She turned again to the chief, the bubbly happiness giving way to seriousness. "You can make sure he pays the fine, right? Withdraw the complaints for us too." 

The chief looked at you and nodded, and you got to work - carefully opening the laptop again and making sure that you transferred the report from 'investigation' to 'resolved', and that the complaint was withdrawn. 

The chief, meanwhile, made physical records of it, and informed Taehyung of the fine - which, despite his insistence, Ms. Park paid off, whipping out a cheque she had kept ready, somehow. You added the details to his resolved record as the chief dictated them to you, keeping them for future references - which you hoped would only be needed to prove his innocence in any situation. 

Nearly twenty minutes of details, questioning, and a written assurance from Taehyung that he would be liable to arrest if he continued illegal activities, it was done. Taehyung was free. 

The chief read over the details once again, thoroughly, eyes getting heavier and softer with every document he checked. Once it was all done, filed, and you had stacked the records back in the drawers they were placed in, the chief sagged into the chair, hands clutching the steel arms for support. 

"Thank God," he whispered, eyes closed. "You're fine now." He got up shakily, hands wiping at his eyes to erase any traces of the tears that had possibly leaked out. He walked around the table, reaching for Taehyung - as if beyond the lines of that desk, his duties as an officer stopped and those as a teacher resumed. "Don't you dare do that again, Taehyung. Never again." He held his student by the shoulder tightly, gripping him and shaking him a little - like a parent would scold a kid. "Live a good life, please." 

Taehyung nodded frantically, eyes still wide in disbelief as he ignored the grubby tear streaks on his face. "I will, sir." He had his hands placed politely in front of him, trembling fingers clutching onto the rough denim fabric of the old, loose jeans you had made him wear. 

"Live well," the chief repeated again, thumping Taehyung's shoulder once and then turning around to collect the documents he would need to take with him. He bowed to Ms. Park, who acknowledged him before something at a corner of the small office caught her eye, and turned sharply to you. "Officer Y/N," he began, and you tensed a little bit more. "There was an opening last night in the forensic science department that I got notice of," he said, a smile tugging on the edges of his lips when he saw how your demeanor brightened. "Reach the head office tomorrow in the morning at ten, and I'll give you the details. All the best." 

You hastily held back the sudden smile that threatened to split on your face, smartly saluting your senior before he turned around to leave the office. As he opened the door, you felt a burst of warmth all over your body - the heat of the sunshine rushing into the room. 

Ms. Park walked from her corner to Taehyung, taking his palm between hers and squeezing. "I'm happy that you're free now, Taehyung." She looked carefully at his face - sternness making way for soft concern, and said, "Live wisely. If you need money, or a job to get you started, come to my shop - it's the one you painted with orchids. You remember it, right?" 

Taehyung responded with a rather choked 'yes', nodding his head frantically. He placed his other, trembling hand upon the lady's hands, and solemnly thanked her. 

"That's not needed, I told you." She smiled, before patting his cheek. "You deserve to let yourself live, so use this chance well. Work hard." She turned her head to look through the window behind her, groaning a bit at the sight of the brightly burning sun. "I better leave now - it seems that I'll end up getting a sunburn the nearer to twelve it is." She turned back to Taehyung, smiling softly, and patting his cheek. "Turn up at the shop tomorrow morning, we'll figure something out." 

"Oh, and officer?" she faced you, pointing in the corner where she was standing a few moments before. "I think my grandson had left his plushie over here a few days ago - it's this one, right?" You followed where her hand was pointing, finding a pumpkin plushie left casually on top of a table. "Sungwoo told me he had lost it some time ago, so I just thought it was this one," she laughed awkwardly. 

"I think it is his, he had come yesterday to file a missing complaint for it too," you said, causing Ms. Park to laugh. "He really loves it, doesn't he?" 

"He's not slept well since it went missing. Anyways, I better take it with me, if that's all."

"Just a moment, ma'am," you stopped her hastily. "He'd left a note for the plushie too - I believe Peter?" 

The elderly woman laughed at her grandson's antics, taking the note you offered her and grinning as she read it. "Yes, yes, Peter. I'll take the note with me. Thank you so much for everything, officer."

Thank you, you wish to say - unable to understand how she volunteered to be an eyewitness and defend the one person you cared so much for. Maybe words wouldn't be enough for you to convey how grateful you were to her, so you simply bowed to the woman. 

She took Taehyung's hand again, gently pressing on the back of his hand. "Your mother used to help me out in the shop, you know." Taehyung nodded, and she smiled. "Your hands are like hers. Delicate, yet strong. You can craft beauty with this hand, Taehyung." She squeezed his hand, smiling. "Don't just let that beauty slip away from you." 

She patted his hand again, before turning to you and smiling, and heading out. The sunlight bounced off her gray hair to shine on Taehyung as you looked at him - even with a tired expression, he looked more alive than you had seen him in the last few hours. 

"I'm free," he said, saying it aloud and letting himself feel the sensation for a few moments. 

He turned to you, watching the way your eyes told him that you understood everything you wanted to tell him - even the things he himself didn't understand. "I'm free, Y/N," he repeated, carefully examining his wrists that were once bound with handcuffs - no. There were no restraints there. 

His eyes panned around the room. There was no investigator who questioned him about why he simply couldn't admit his crime. No one who made fun of him for seeking comfort in his art - even if it was illegal. "I'm really free," he murmured again.

Taehyung leaped towards you, pulling you close and holding you tight, as if unable to believe that you were there with him: and that he was here with you for as long as he wanted to be. You let your arms circle around his neck, one curling through the hair at his nape and pulling him further into your embrace, and the other spread out over his back - trying to remind yourself that yes, he was here, with you. 

"Thank you," you felt him murmur into your shoulder. 

"For what?"

"Just being here. With me." He sighed, further tightening the hands that rested around your waist. "After so many unfamiliar faces over the years, seeing yours feels like a reward of sorts for behaving well." 

You laughed at him, slapping his back light heartedly. "Don't talk like you did anything wrong all those years ago. It's not good." You let your hands pane across the expanse of his skin, feeling him cling on to you as you tried to calm him down. "I'm happy for you, Tae." 

He held you like that, for a few more moments - like you were slowly pulling him back into what could be his new normal life. Waking up every day in a room that doesn't have steel bars as a door. Not having to crash at the old house that had haunted him for years. Not having to hide his face in the fear that someone would taunt him for his past. Actually doing something that made him feel happy, confident, and alive. 

"I'm happy too," he murmured into your shoulder. You hummed as he looked beyond your frame to see the streets outside the window - seeing how they were illuminated in daylight. How animatedly people were talking about what their plans for the day were. A kid kept hopping on a chalk drawing of hopscotch he had drawn on the footpath, clutching onto a plushie that oddly seemed like a pumpkin. Someone walked around their stall, setting things up for the day. 

You pulled him away from your grip to look at him again - not wanting to forget any part of him in any way. "I still care for you as much as I did all those years ago, you know." You put your hands on his biceps, just as you used to do when you had to knock sense into your friend. "You better not hide anything from me now." 

"I have no intentions of," he grinned. "Thank you very much." 

You giggled, a feeling you hadn't felt in years fluttering around your stomach like butterflies. 

"About us," Taehyung began, holding your hands in his, "You know that I love you, right?" You felt yourself tense up, and probably Taehyung did too, as he squeezed your hands. "I'm not in any hurry. I want to take some time to understand myself and what I want to do before I think of anything with you. But when I'm settled, and I'm someone I can be proud of, I want to come back to you. Be with you forever." He let go of your hands to hold your cheeks, smiling as he saw your big eyes peer at him. "You'll let me, right?" 

Your eyes softened. "Of course, Taehyung."

"Tae." He corrected you, coming closer to press a kiss on your forehead. 

You smiled when he moved back, glancing down at all of him and laughing. "For beginners, how about we get you clothes to change into?" 

He looked down at his clothes, laughing with you. "Let's go, then?" 

You nodded at him, pulling him out of the office, and locking it securely before turning to a widely grinning Taehyung. "I have a feeling I'm going to love the daytime. It's just so positive, and nice, don't you think? Really warm all over." 

"You're just saying that because you lived like a night owl," you laughed at him, watching his eyes sparkle in the sunshine. 

"Yeah, that wasn't the best way to live, was it?" He clicked his tongue and frowned. "Guess I better start living well now. To new beginnings, then, Officer!!" He grinned and poked your forehead. 

You watched Taehyung skip over the pebbles that were lined outside the office, walking freely on the streets, feeling the dread that you had let build up in your heart for so long slowly drain out of you. "Wait for me!" You screamed behind him, running to catch up to him. To new beginnings, you thought. 

a/n: hopefully, this piece of writing was worth your time 😊 thank you so much for reading graffiti and chalk!! I'd love to hear any feedback you have. Feel free to send it in as a comment, reblog, or as an ask! love, hazel 💞

taglist: @taejinnies (the torture is over bahaha), @xiaokoo, @thedarkwinterrose, @shatzkrinslinzki

masterlist

[dannyketch]

This is a list of explicitly trans comics that I feel comfortable about recommending. There’s a lot of bad and iffy ones that I've read, but these are the better ones.

Claudine- It's obviously a comic that was made to help cisgender people understand and have more empathy for trans people, but it is a really good comic that says that Claude was a man not because of external circumstances messing him up, but just because he was born that way, and if the world wasn't as discriminatory as it was, he could have had a good life. It has beautiful art and wonderful writing, but it's a tragedy so I wouldn't read it while in a depressive rut or anything.

The Mermaid Prince- This is manga is a genderbender, but it's also explicitly trans due to it's description and calling what happens to our mermaid love interest as a sex change. This is the only BL manga I've seen that has a trans man, and it was also the first time I've seen a seinen drawn and written cutesy. If you like fairytale romances, you'll probably like this one.

My Best Friend Became a Boy- This is an ongoing web manhwa that's also a genderbender, but it's very clear that the main love interest/male lead has been a boy even before the magical genderbending thing, and it's just very trans overall. This one is on the younger side of shoujo comics, but if you want to read a normal shoujo romance where the love interest is a tboy, this is a fun option.

Haikei, Seken-sama- Another ongoing one. This time it's a seinen manga with a trans writer that's based off of his experiences. There’s no translation, official or otherwise, for it out yet, so I've been reading it with Google translate's camera option. It's a pretty grounded and down to earth manga, but it does take some trips into melodrama in regards to romance and bullying. This is definitely one of the more realistic ones on here. Also tw for sexual assault

After School Mates- This comic just finished, but the scanlations haven't yet. I have mixed feelings about this comic. I liked it overall and think it did a decent job with portraying trans issues and dysfunctional family relationships. I also think the friendship between the cis and trans boy protags is very sweet, but this comic acts like cis boys/men can either accept that their trans boy friend is a boy or they can have a crush on them, and that there is no overlap, so I didn't like that. But other than that, it's a pretty good comic. (I read till the ending with Google translate camera rip)

Double House- A josei yuri between two complicated women who live in the same apartment building together. It's a short read, but still good. I did think that it had a touch of cis people projecting onto trans people to be philosophical, but it's enjoyable despite that.

I Wanna Be Your Girl- Another yuri, this time a shoujo. There’s aspects to this that I like and some that I don't. I thought it did a good job showing that having a crush on your friend that's trans doesn't mean that you are ignoring or undermining their gender, sometimes you're just gay lol. But I thought that it acted like trans people were making up how bad transphobia is and that we shouldn't act/respond to transphobes. It was too passive and on the side of transphobes for me on that aspect.

Yuzu no Koto- This is a shoujo that's mostly written for cis people, but if you just want a cute story about trans kids, here ya go.

Lovely Complex- I recommend the anime, but yeah this romcom shoujo has a trans side character who's adorable and that I love. They misgender her at some parts, but she's a girl through and through.

A Thousand and One Nights in Wonderland- This is an 80s fairytale shoujo that has a tboy protagonist. The story is not about him being trans, but him being trans informs everything he does. It was honestly really cool reading a comic where the main character just happens to be trans instead of that being the plot. He ends up getting married and getting what can only be described as a magical sex change. Only chapter one of this is on scanlation websites, I've been translating this on my own, so dm for chapters if you want to read. I'm not done yet, but I have almost 2 volumes translated.

Alters- an indie superhero comic with a closeted trans woman lead. It's a pretty fun series.

Blood Syndicate- this is one of my favorite superhero series of all time. It's about this half gang/half superhero teen team with powers that all kinda hate each other but are the closest any of them has to a family. One of the members is Masquerade, whose trans and is really interesting. The series got canceled before it could be finished and the last issue is just lamenting on what a shame it is that it never got to finish rather than tying things up, so there's just a ton of unfinished plotlines, but even though it's a short series, what is there is gold.

Rachel Pollack's Doom Patrol Run- The recently departed and much loved Rachel Pollack was the writer for Doom Patrol for a time in the 90s, and her series is beautiful, awe encompassing, and so interesting. It both is heavy with trans themes as well as having a trans main character. It's great, and even if you don't usually like superhero comics I recommend it.

Deathwish- Another Milestone comics story, this time written by Maddie Blaustein, who also voiced Meowth in Pokémon. This is a mini series that's a detective murder mystery with a trans woman lead who is trying to find a serial killer who is going after her sisters.

Life Outside the Circle- A finished Finnish webcomic that is actually about the gay experience in the countryside. It's a beautifully written series and feels so real and true, and the love interest in it is a trans man. Him being trans isn't a plot point or anything, but he is trans and so is his writer/artist.

Glass Scientists- An American webcomic that's a Jekyll and Hyde reimagining with a lot of other mad scientist types. I've been reading it for years, and it's a very fun series that revealed around last year that one of the main characters was trans. The way they handled his story was really good and relatable to me personally. He also has a girlfriend, and ism the only trans character there since a side character also came out to him. This is ongoing and worth it.

Inside Out: A Yuri Tale- I actually need to catch up to this webcomic, but it's good and about a bunch of lgbt kids and their stories. It's also a yuri romance, obviously lol

La Nueva Chica Del Barrio- If you can read Spanish or are willing to translate it, this web comic is a must read in my book. It's this really long running series about a little trans girl, and every time I read it, I feel so content and seen. It's very heartwarming and the characters feel really realistic. Tw for attempted child trafficking tho

Venus Envy- a webcomic that's a classic. It's a comedy about a trans girl who moved to a new school at the start of her transition. It isn't finished and never will be, but it deserves a read. Tw for rape

Brave New World of Love- A shoujo series that's definitely a product of its time, but it's also about a trans girl doing her best to find love and live her best life at a new school. It's really short, and I think if it had gone on longer, it would have found a nice rythem for itself, but short as it is, it does have it's cute moments. Tw for attempted rape

Some trans dc characters that it's worth looking up their comics: Circuit Breaker, Xanthe, Kid Quick, Dreamer, and there's probably some others but that's off the top of my head.

Marvel: Escapade, Sera, and Dr. Charlene McGowan

fuck does anyone have recommendations for explicitly trans comics and manga? boys run the riot just chewed me up and spit me out and I loved it

[captainkurosolaire]

~ Mass Update ~

Mainly going into future plans and intents alongside ideas below cut.

Ton's of things I've in store this will prove difficult to vent it all out. But here we go... First off rehashing and appropriately learning to tag and organize things better on my blog. Each category will have their own corresponding content, I seek to bring or share. [Tales of Goldbrand] -- I intend this to carry a Compendium of all my writes soon that'll have everything neatly in-order including a glossary, so it'll have highlights of stories that even matter or the best stuff. I've written here for a very, long time, there's been many shifts. I want to make it more accessible. While coloring what matters for people who want to learn Captain or his Crew with less chapters. While also giving choice to find it all easily. This is essentially a step-above master-lists. I'll be doing that after the Saga I have going on, right now is done. [Captain] -- Will provide you strictly with Captain screenshots, gifs, photo-sets. This is still his blog despite the Crew thing's will sort of make this a scuffed Multi-Muse blog. I've few more things to edit and tag fix to get all his stuff though. [The Wild Crew] -- Afterwards this story is done Immortal Age Saga, It's something that I mainly wrote as a passion project within three days to get my warm-up process fixed. It's to allow me to get a feel for all his Crewmates and casts, in combat, in-general, to feel their presences. While also giving a bit of their backstories. At any point, I can go back and polish or tweak things in. They're NPC's but... not entirely. All will have their own 'Dreams' and their own 'Disapproval's' they have their own missions even. These things will factor eventually, they might set seeds, to betray or disagree with something, but that's all angst and more stories to be created, but overall, they'll probably always be Crew, eventually. -- I plan on making character-profile sheets of them and putting them in this Tab, it'll have their screenshots, their likes/dislikes. Some RP partners or people can also be shipped with them, but they'll all be monogamous and originally start off probably Pan. This allows them to figure out what they like on their own stories. I've always been someone who likes organic-flow. Although this one story contain all 16 characters or more, the rest will probably be shortened to a Squad of 4 and dispersed when on adventuring missions. Until I do a War Arc, that's my main goal to build too. [Roster] -- Will contain this Crew in just screen-sets dedicated to them, I'll probably randomly produce those. I've PC players among this Crew too. I may not be done either adding more, but this Crew is mainly built around Quality. Most pirate crew's mainly, have hundreds, thousands. Even Fleets. This Crew has personalities, monsters, people who are living life's that exist with piracy. He's an particular leader that had PC players the same way, he's had split-personality serial killers aboard, tribal chieftains, succubus, all sorts of various people once on a Crew. It's often an outcast style, pirates default are chaotic in nature, so this really isn't any different, it's a Fantasy version of it. There's humanization characters aboard too though, so this cast is really decked, everything and person is vital, they matter because they remind or covet something that others can draw upon. If ever played (Three Houses or Mass Effect / Dragon Age Origins) A lot of things like that are relatable too this structure and format. Which, Is something I want to be able to give when RPing. I want a genuine feel of this new world someone else's muse will be the main-character too. Depending on what's interacting everything they'll be scale appropriately to follow the genre they're in and environment even. [Aesthetics] -- Already explainable what you'll find here. [Asks] -- Same thing. [Prompts] -- Trivial things I was tagged too, I plan on compiling later. [Writing] -- Another alternatively to randomly go-down and it works right now. [Logs] -- Will have more individualistic master-lists and posts there, my poems from Sheik Sphere the Bard, etc.

Things of that nature, I'll probably add still. It's where a lot of my creative writing is summed. [Gems of Hydaelyn] -- My main #tag for other characters and artists, creationist. Lot of amazing people easily to find their zones or follow them optionally if you like. Ton's I intend to support and bolster, be a lot less unspoken. I'm never the type who's been strictly inclusive. But I'll do that when I've time to even explore the dash, I'm always still planning ahead with things and projects. [CKS] My original character-sheet it's outdated on something's but not too terrible. I'll give him polishing someday, I swear? [21+F-List] -- Just purely degenerate stuff of Captain. I'm a pirate blog. I will represent that with openness and furthermore. I'm never projecting you some false-image. I started off a smut-writer by stripping that, I no-longer represent the same aura and identity. But those are strictly his stuff and kinks, I'm effective in executing them but they're not all relatable to me OOC. This blog will always be 18+ containing crude or dark material sometimes, romantic things, this Captain is blunt, will literally put his cock on the table in conversations. Swearing and being censored would be too uncommon and displace most of him, but there's more about him then all this. [Other] -- I pay homage to a lot of characters, I originally am a Concept Designer. Which mean's I make characters and ideas like my addiction. Bad characters / villains or other little things I like to share in designs, I'll put there. Some villains might get little photo-sets, even if they died. Just cause I like their design, or maybe I'll give them an AU, where they won. When I've wrapped up things. [Collabs + Ships] -- Is a new project idea. This isn't going to be something limited too romantic only ships. It'll contain, platonic, romantic, friendships, rivals, frenemies, family, PC Crew, all ships. I am desperately working on improving my gif, screenshot, posing game so I can supply 'Screen Stories' this is not only a way to RP that's accessible with even people who are upon time-crunches from work, It gives visual-representation. To impactful stories shared with others and establish bonds. That are all-valid and impactful matter. Lot of people take a lot of their characters attributes into them and are them dialed up, I work with that and bit more, differently. I'm disconnected from my characters and they'll get hurt and injured and killed by me, that's my duty as their Author to give them conflicts and struggles. I'm their major antagonist, but that doesn't mean at-all, it's always SET that way. The characters I like to make have their own life, they live in this setting and are abide by it, they're often nothing, nobodies, and by the interacting with others, they slowly gradually building, more... Through emotional impacts, they alter, these are REAL people by all their beliefs. Each person they come in-contact with are legitimate and treated like that too. They've always impacted or given them insights to grow, or represent more. Otherwise it'd be criminally disrespectful if I allowed any emotional I felt OOC be the grudge to something IC. Captain in-particular is set on defying me. I cannot have that. ...But I can't stop him. He's met and encountered so many people and lived so many scenarios based on the actions of others, he's giving a chance right now to actually do things a lot further than impossible. The more people he meets and encounters, experiences, the more I lose. These stories are emotionally interactive where everything is a factor and adds to the dice, where the other people are the one who get to roll the dice for him, not me. That's something I want to color in. People range in emotions, they have their down's, ups, their own wholesome-grounding people, spending time with your favorite people, there's nothing more cherishing than that, being in your own comfort-zone or 'safe-space' these are all treasures that we live under, today. Contrary if what people assume of me, I'm not another 'blogger' that's came

before, who's wanting to force a harem, then constantly is bewildered when that falls to pieces cause of selfishness or a lack of communication, or the skeletons they have in their closets and beliefs they hid behind and swindled fooled everyone. I'm not looking to be popular or anything really, I just create stories and want to share in those, and I want to also boost others included, upward with me, especially those who make me. There's no ego in anything I do, this is purely love. I've never cared about being replicated or duplicated, I've had stalkers, I've gone through more then anyone would imagine, I've been used OOC and abused, just for my writing and cold-harshly told, i'd never amount to anything other then that or vice-versa. --------------------------------------------------------------------- Passion. That's all I got and am anymore. --------------------------------------------------------------------- Passion is the hardest thing to keep. It's something that can be stolen, quite effortlessly. Few words of discouragement, a bad negative representation, a lack of confidence, or small amount of time, there's many thing's that can put that flame out. Once you lose it. The difficulty to reattain is hundred-times harder than climbing any mountain for real. I've watched the greatest creators crumble from under the pressure, from beaten down by others. I watched many of them do it to themselves because they put a grand vision of needing validation of another and once lost, felt uncompelling to press onward. But passion also can be given BACK and drawn. It can be shown and encourage others, with a soft-triggering, that pushes them. That motivates, that constantly sticks to it. There are many that fuel me. If I ever quit, I let them down, I spit in the faces of people who're better than me in every-way. Or people who've came and given me their precious Time. That have given their character's or dedication to the abundant stories and community-driven things I've done. There's ONLY things you can do, create, give and provide. It cannot ever come to life without YOU. This is a fact. ...I swear, If you let your creativity soar, you'll be amazed by the heights you get. Constantly polish and learn and hone the best you, challenge yourself day after painstaking day, to draw better improvement on something, no matter how trivial or unfamiliar you are. You'll find a confidence only you can give yourself. ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Future Plans --------------------------------------------------------------------- For me, I've got so much more stories to give and also explore, I might be taking up soon some other artists and more skilled people from community and hire them for some of my future writes, to up my game or cause something thing's can't be done in-game cause no background carries it. I also got a lot of-set up things and more angst stuff I want to practice, plus I'm adamantly on that grind to produce screen-sets with the intent's to some sort of improving daily. Additionally more people I'll be reaching out too soon for these collab's ideas and things. I look forward to shaking your hands, giving some hugs, show you my respect and admiration, then creating some enchanting stories and giving plots light. Feel free to reach out to me, I get scattered-brain but I'm working on getting better about it. Eventually will get to you though, my goals, if uninterested just say so when I poke, no bites, unless you kinky. Anyways, cheers hearties.

[your-turn-to-role]

This is coming from a place of genuine confusion....but why does a sect of the fandom dislike Marisha so much?? Like, I haven't seen it for ANY of the other players. Is it a "wife/girlfriend of the DM" complex, because I've seen that before. Idk, I don't get it, and no amount of googling has made me understand lol.

yeahhhhhhh

okay, to preface, i absolutely disagree with all of the marisha hate, i think she's a great player and is really unfairly treated

but a couple reasons why this tends to be a thing:

1) just plain old regular misogyny, yeah. all the girls on cr get it to an extent, but it's stronger with marisha - the idea that dnd is inherently a man's game and therefore no woman could be good at it is pervasive even in this fandom, not outright, but in subtle things, like how people give the guys a lot more leeway to do dumb shit than the girls, and on dnd posts in the past i've seen comments like "this reads like how laura and marisha would describe dnd while their husbands facepalm in the background", which like... isn't really harmful on the surface, but i have a hard time imagining matt and especially travis ever facepalming at their wives genuine ideas? like if it's obviously meant to be something ridiculous and not taken seriously, sure, but otherwise, that subtle implication that they see travis as a better player than laura is just way off. (and matt has more dnd experience than marisha but like... she's still a very good player)

2) the keyleth instinct. so here's the thing about campaign one and the characters they chose to play - the majority of the cast played within their comfort zone. they branched out a lot for c2, and obviously they as people aren't identical to their vox machina counterparts, but they're not too far away either. liam's stated he irl would be a rogue, taliesin likes playing intelligent edgy teenage assholes bc he was one, laura is a bit more goofy than vex but she still thinks a lot the same, scanlan is very sam, travis is obviously a lot smarter than grog but he still fell very in line with the kind of character travis is comfortable playing and the things he wants to explore.

but marisha chose a character in campaign one who was completely the opposite of her natural self. marisha is confident and very take no shit and a natural leader, keyleth is awkward and shy and doubts herself and overthinks things and has really bad luck in basically everything she ever tries. and people watched campaign one and assumed all of those traits were just the way marisha was. if you aren't drawn to keyleth as a character, it's relatively easy to find ways to hate her (which again circles back to the misogyny a bit). they see keyleth constantly fuck up due to awkwardness and think "marisha doesn't know how to play the game". they see keyleth be a mess of a person socially and think "wow marisha's not a very good actor if she can't handle this", completely ignoring the fact that she is acting very well and it's proven by the fact that they think keyleth is marisha

(and while she still gets hate as either character, the keyleth hate was far worse than the beau hate)

3) people just, not getting what she's doing. i wasn't in the fandom for the early days of cr2, but i have friends who were, and they've said there were circles of the fandom where everything marisha did was in question, even people not believing beau was a lesbian when it's made obvious in episode one, because what if she's doing it on purpose as a scam? and like, to broaden that a bit, i think marisha's characters and their decisions get misread a lot. i personally happen to find both beau and keyleth very relatable, so i usually get where they're coming from (mostly, bowlgate i was more on caleb's side there, but i still don't think she deserves hate for it), but to people who don't, or just haven't put effort into trying to understand marisha's characters, then between keyleth's awkwardness and beau's abrasiveness i think the majority of what they pick up from marisha's characters is negative

which is a shame, because they're both really good, well thought out, interesting characters.

4) this is going into my own meta for a bit, but, something i've found about marisha's characters is they're quite down to earth and very easily the viewpoint character of the group, in a way? like obviously it's an ensemble cast, but like... let's take keyleth. campaign one starts and ends with her. the very first adventure is triggered by her leaving home for the first time, to start her aramente. she's led a sheltered life up to this point, she doesn't know the world she's walking into - so we learn about this fantasy world at the same time she does. she has the most linear and easy to follow development, her aramente spans most of the story, and once it's done things only get more centered on her. she's now a leader of her people, she's fulfilled her destiny, but that means she lives so long all her worst fears are coming true - that she'll have to spend the rest of her life alone. how did we learn this was her biggest fear? because she's been scared since the start of losing vax, but the reason she has him at all is she resolved to not let that fear control her. and then as the endgame comes in, she suddenly has to face that head on. vax has a week left to live. barely two days after, they run into sprigg - someone who lived so long after all his friends died that he's lost himself, forgotten them, become a hermit of a person who's just living because he's got nothing better to do - everything keyleth believes she will become, and fears so much. but he proves she can still choose to remember them, and choose to live in their absence, not just survive. keyleth is the one who seals away vecna, who's grown so much in her power since that little scared druid girl, she can banish a god. and our story ends with her, and her father, and a raven - she's moving on, she's living, she's thriving, but she'll never forget.

if i was gonna write out vox machina's story as a novel, there is no character who would better suit being the protagonist than her

it's a bit less strong with beau, but she's still one of the more relatable characters, she's a human, who had a rebellious teenage years because of shitty overbearing parents, she's not a magic user, she's from the country we start in (and doesn't have a dark dangerous mystical secret like caleb and veth), a lot of the big turning points in the story have had her take the lead, it's the relative mundanity that gives a contrast to and lifts up the others, while still being a highly interesting character in her own right. beau is a grounding force of the mighty nein.

i personally like those kinds of characters, but i've noticed in almost all fandoms with a main character and then a group of side characters, the main character is rarely anyone's fave, overlooked in favour more (subjectively) interesting side characters, but then because the story puts the focus on the main character, people get sick of them and start to hate them? and in this form of storytelling, there is no main character, but people sorta do that to those kinds of characters anyway. and in addition to all the other marisha stuff, that probably contributes

[loopy777]

Non-Review: Free Comic Book Day 2021 - The Legend of Korra (Also Featuring Avatar: The Last Airbender)

With all the hype around 'Suki Alone,' it looks to me like most of the fandom missed that an additional Avatar comic with a story from each cartoon's era was just released for Free Comic Book Day. You can read them for yourself on either Dark Horse Digital or Comixology where it's mislabeled as being for ages 17+ (free accounts are required for both), but I'm sure one of the reasons you all love me is because of my willingness to jump in between you and these comics like the deadly bullets they can be. Well, I'm happy to die (metaphorically) for the sake of (a little anonymous internet) love, so I'm doing a full snarky review for each ten-page story. Also, I'm bored, and it's more fun to make fun of mediocre stuff than to praise stuff I like.

It's time for me to review "Free Comic Book Day 2021 - The Legend of Korra (Also Featuring Avatar: The Last Airbender)" or more specifically "The Legend of Korra: Clearing the Air" and "Avatar: The Last Airbender: Matcha Makers."

CLEARING THE AIR

The cover makes this look like a story about Jinora and Ikki having a sibling conflict. That's a lie. The Air Sisters arguing is merely the inciting incident for Tenzin telling a story of his youth. I should note that, as inconsequential as the Air Sisters stuff is, it's actually written very well because it posits Ikki as a victim of circumstance and Jinora as a bully who terrorizes her little sister with threats of getting thrown in jail by Metalbenders for an accident, cementing the characterization from the cartoon. This is not sarcasm. I really do think Jinora is presented by LoK as a Holier Than Thou little snot who just so happened to be naturally gifted with magic spirit-powers, but for some reason the rest of the fandom doesn't agree with me.

Anyway, Tenzin comes in to find the arguing (and Meelo just running amok for the fun of it and so far these characterizations are perfect), and rather than telling Jinora to shut her stupid face, he delivers a tale of his youth about conflict resolution.

So the meat of the story is how, when Tenzin was "a few years older" than Jinora, a pair of vandals got onto Air Temple Island and burned some graffiti into the spinning-panel things that Korra will destroy out of frustration during her Airbending training. Literally, the vandals are depicted as scorching the wood with enough smoke to be seen across a plaza. Tenzin goes after the vandals and they flee across the bay back to Republic City proper (one of the vandals is a Waterbender with a surf-plank). Tenzin pursues, catches them, and attacks them hard enough to smash some dockside crates. They are all then arrested by Metalbenders and dragged before Chief Toph. She's going to let Tenzin go (yay Toph!) and throw the vandals in jail (YAY TOPH!) and makes this face, and this entire comic is worth it:

However, Aang arrives and instead arranges to forgo the jail-time in favor of an Air Nomad Conflict Resolution Ceremony. This is nice and in-character, but I'm totally with Tenzin that these vandals should have been thrown in jail. They literally burned insulting graffiti into antiques from a genocided culture. But instead, Aang demonstrates conflict resolution by having Tenzin explain why he's hurt and what needs to be done to redress the wrong. And so the vandals help Tenzin scrub the graffiti off the panels with water and rags and mops- how, I don't know, since they were literally burned.

They also do a ceremony thing where they each take turns bending their element into a central space between them to 'clear the air' (GET IT GET IT HA HA IT'S ALMOST LIKE A PUN BUT NOT), so it's a good thing they were all Benders because this is kinda racist. This fixes all the problems and everyone is friends. Yay!

In the present, though, things are not so nice, because Tenzin's kids are still screaming at and provoking each other. Korra comes in with Asami at the end to ask what's going on, and Asami says nothing, so I still think everyone is characterized with perfect consistency with the cartoon.

I made this sound silly, but (aside from the spinny-panels getting cleaned with a little water and elbow-grease, which doesn't matter because Korra will eventually blow them all up anyway), I actually like this one. It has Tenzin demonstrate how much he's always had to work to be the Perfect Air Monk that everyone expects him to be, and Aang acknowledges how this is unfair but that Tenzin will never let him down no matter what. It also has Katara come in at the end (for just one line, boo!) to acknowledge that this was an especially easy little conflict for Tenzin to practice on and he'll eventually face worse. I found it a nice adult moment in a story that's otherwise clearly aimed at 8-year-olds.

The art is good. It's simpler than the LoK cartoon, with flat colors, but it captures the story and has enough liveliness for everyone's character to come across in their look and body-language. The brief action-sequence where Tenzin attacks the vandals is well done, moving quickly but showing the full flow of the fight and every move Tenzin makes.

MATCHA MAKERS

Apparently, "Matcha is finely ground powder of specially grown and processed green tea leaves, traditionally consumed in East Asia" according to Wikipedia. I had to look that up. I'm curious how many people understood the full reference in the title, especially since these comics are aimed at kids too young to be allowed on the internet.

This is a very simple story about Iroh in his tea-shop in Ba Sing Se. He has an assistant/waitress named Feng, a new character who wears glasses, ruining the hopes and dreams of all the fanfic-writers who were so sure he'd rescue Jin from the Lower Ring. A frequent patron of the tea shop is an elegant, older lady (very clearly Upper Ring material) named Li-Mei, who cannot go a single panel without giving Iroh a HEY BIG BOY look. She is very clearly smitten. Also, I feel the need to clarify that she knows his name is Iroh, so apparently Ba Sing Se is okay with the Dragon of the West serving tea to their wealthy. I don't say that as a criticism, I'm just noting it.

That night, Iroh meets up with his friends- the Pokemon-style spirits that we saw in Legend of Korra. (I don't know if they're the actual spirits from LoK, or just new spirits in the same style. This is because I would sooner grind matcha into my eyes than rewatch Book Spirits.) He serves them his special blend of tea and talks about how he's totally into Li-Mei but isn't going to pursue it because he's feeling old and doesn't want to take a risk. At this point, I could stop describing the plot because between the title and what I've said so far, I'm sure you could figure out every single plot beat that will follow.

The next day, the spirits trip Feng so that she drops Li-Mei's tea and Iroh needs to bring a replacement, and they've drawn hearts on top of the replacement tea with foam or sugar or milk or whatever. I don't know because I've never bought tea in a place that will even put the bag in the hot water for me. Iroh gets out of the situation without starting any love-affairs and runs into the back to tell the spirits to knock it off, dudes, they're totally embarrassing him! The spirits respond by giving him a flyer for a romantic restaurant. I don't know how they got it, so I can only assume that some Upper Ringer had their mail diverted.

Iroh refuses, so when Li-Mei orders more tea and he brings it to her, the spirits hover just out of her sight and threaten to smash the furniture. I am not making that up. They literally threaten to smash Iroh's furniture unless he asks the lady out. He submits to their tyrannical threats, Li-Mei happily accepts the date, he happily accepts her acceptance, and the story comes to a close. Iroh thanks his spirits friends for opening him up to new experience, but hopes that next time (so I guess Iroh is signing up for Tinder after this?) they won't threaten his shop.

At best, I can describe this story as 'harmless.' But it's been a long week and I just got a bunch more extra work at my day job that I really don't want to do, so I'm going to go ahead and call this story 'dumb.' It's rote, leans towards humor without actually being funny at all, and turns the spirits of the setting into Pokemon. And not even the cool dragon kind.

The art is strangely stiff. The coloring is soft and nice, but the drawings seems more 'assembled' than actually drawn. I swear there are even a few panels that reminded me of 'How I Became Yours' with janky poses, horrifying expressions, and just enough resemblance to the original cartoon to make me think a screenshot was partially traced and then ruined. (I'm not accusing the artist of tracing, BTW. I wouldn't even condemn the artist for tracing if they did. I'm just describing that HIBY feeling I got.) It was so stiff that rather than hear Iroh's dialogue in Mako's rich tones, I instead imagined Greg Baldwin doing a stiff Mako-impression with no naturalism to the delivery.

This story is definitely worthy of its "Also Featuring" billing. I'd rate it below Gene Yang's Mai and Suki FCBD short stories, but above everything else he wrote for Avatar.

So there you go. Overall, this is very middle-of-the-pack for Avatar FCBD stuff. It's very much of the nature of the 'Team Avatar Tales' stuff, and I wouldn't be surprised if the Iroh story was a leftover from that project. On Free Comic Book Day, you often get what you pay for.