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#OWS incorrect quotes
ssj2hindudude · 2 years
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U think u can come up with headcanons or incorrect quotes about Sydney relationship with the OWS commanders? As they are their creator?
Hmm, I could try. Let's see... Got it!
Sydney has "the talk"
Sydney: Grandpa, may I ask you a question?
Leon: Certainly, Sydney. What's on your mind?
Sydney: Where do babies come from?
Leon: *spits his water* Why do you ask?
Sydney: I am well aware of my own creation as the Professor downloaded my own schematics into my hard drive, but he failed to show me how humans are typically created. And for some reason, whenever I attempt to look up the topic in my database or the local libraries, the 1987 Parental Advisory Label obscures my vision and a blaring noise prevents anyone from reading it to me.
Leon: ...AARIV-
*later*
Aariv: Look, I just didn't want them going around blabbing it to the students by mistake! Besides, they're pure!
Leon: That may be so, but they were built as an adult and deserve to be treated as such. Now, find a way to bypass that child block at once.
Aariv: Maybe if they heard it from someone else...
*even later when all of the OWS are gathered*
Aariv: And that's the situation.
Astoria: Understood. We'll do our best- Maya, what are you still doing in the room?!?
Maya: I wanna know where babies come from!
Cleo: C'mon, Maya.
Maya: No! I'm more mature than half the people here! I want to know-
Cleo: They just added Street Fighter 6 to the arcade!
Maya: ...Forget babies! Let's go!
Aariv: Ok, so who wants to go first?
*everyone takes turns*
Cyrus: A man and a woman light candles, get romantic, cuddle, and after a wild night, the woman ends up preggers and a baby is born nine months later.
Sydney: I do not understand. What is meant by a "wild night"?
Irida: They f**k.
Astoria: IRIDA!
Irida: C'mon, granny. It's not like that's not what happens.
Astoria: At least have some tact! This is a delicate topic!
Sydney: What does it mean to f**k?
Aariv: Oh, now look what you've done! They learned a curse word!
Astoria: Sydney, I'll handle this. Babies are born after a man and a woman...who love each other very much...they touch...OH I CAN'T DO IT! GIVE ME A WAR TO FIGHT ANY DAY! JUST LET IT BE SOMETHING OTHER THAN THIS!
Leon: Are you still not done yet?
Sydney: Please, Grandpa. Explain how humans produce their offspring!
Leon: Sex. It's a process called sex. It's how most creatures on earth produce their offspring and while it's nothing to be ashamed of, it's a very delicate subject that is not to be taken lightly or talked about so openly.
Sydney: Ohhh. Understood.
Leon: Good. There, see? That wasn't so-
Irida: Hey, look out the window, you'll find an example through two squirrels in that tree!
Everyone: IRIDA!
Sydney: Fascinating!
*later*
Sydney: Kara! Would you like to have sex with me!
Kara: WHAT?!?
*starts hugging her*
Sydney: I never knew humans created progeny through hugging! Our child will be adorable!
Kara: Ha ha, yeah. Amazing... *thinking* Oh gods, they don't know a thing. It's so cute!
*Cleo watching through the OWS camera*
Cleo: I can't believe those idiots forgot to teach them about consent...
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slavicshadownr · 1 month
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Phil: Agent Romanoff what are you doing? Natasha: Wrapping Barton’s desk in Saran Wrap. Phil: Uh why? Natasha: He stole my one of my knives. Phil: Couldn’t you have just taken it back? Natasha: I couldn’t find it so I removed all sharp objects from the office so he has to either unwrap it by hand or use my knife. He’s a dumbass so he’ll use my knife which is when I will steal it back and he is left to unwrap it by hand as punishment for stealing my knife in the first place. Phil: That is actually genius. Natasha: Yes. It is.
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daddiesdrarryy · 1 year
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Regulus: Did you regret that I told Sirius we’re dating?
James: No! Of course not. It’s okay, you know, it’s been a while since your brother and I went running in the Forbidden Forest. It was even more fun when he turned into his Animagus form and tried to bite my ass.
Regulus: Did he?
James: He almost did. Moony saved me!
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rm14hitman · 7 months
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Talon groupchat
Reaper : Who the fuck added me to this fucking groupchat ?
Sombra : >:0 language
Sigma : Yeah watch your fucking language
Doomfist : Ok who taught de Kuiper the fuck word ?!
Widowmaker : "The fuck word"...
Moira : Are you all stupid ? You people use the f word all the time
Sombra : Dios mio, they censored it
Reaper : Say fuck, Moira
Sombra : Do it, doc, say fuck
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z-mizcellaneous-z · 2 years
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bakugo: im not gay, but DAMN. you're good-looking, deku. midoriya [smiles]: you don't have to be gay to appreciate a man's beauty! bakugo: bakugo: nah, i'd FUCK you. midoriya: OKAY! NEVERMIND!
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sleeplessdreamer14 · 10 months
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(Name): Jamison, you’ll eat anything.
Junkrat: What? I won’t eat anythin’, I’m pretty discerning.
(Name): (holding small piece of something) Eat this.
Junkrat: (immediately takes it and eats it) Wot was that?
(Name): (holds up a sponge with a small chunk missing)
Junkrat: Don’t feed a guy a sponge, (Nickname)!
(Name): (chuckling) You-
Junkrat: Don’t feed a guy a sponge!
(Name): You put it in your mouth, Jamie!
Junkrat: Ughh!
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poprocks-molerat · 3 months
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Junkrat: Damn, the power went out.
Venture: Don’t worry, I got this.
Venture: *stomps foot*
Junkrat: What-?
Venture: *Sketchers light up*
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alienoresimagines · 4 months
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Curt, drunk: It's so annoying how Buck is good at everything. There's got to be something he's terrible at.
Brady: Maybe he's a bad kisser.
Bucky, also drunk: No, he's really good at that too.
The 100th: ...
The 100th: WHAT?!
*30 seconds later*
Curt, stepping on a table with a grin : Alright people, pay up!
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naruto: do you ever think about how kakashi-sensei acts more like our dad than our teacher?
sasuke, thinking about fugaku: don’t be stupid he’s way too nice to us to be like a dad
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dawnthefox24 · 4 months
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Mauga: You saved me! Why? Venture: People would think I murdered you if I didn't.
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Kaz: I get my news from the only reliable source, cryptic symbolism in my dreams…
Kaz: Also these council papers I stole from Wylan
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incorrect-hs-quotes · 7 months
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NEPETA: :33 < more people should ackmeowledge my influence on transfem culture
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slavicshadownr · 1 month
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Steve: I don't know, we all just kind of thought you were dating... Clint: Why would you think that? Bruce: You always finish each other's sentences. Natasha, sighing: That's not romance, that's wanting to have the last word.
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disastertriowriting · 6 months
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Hunter: Crosshair, I sense hostility. Crosshair: Good, because I hate you.
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pain-is-too-tired · 2 months
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Clarisse: Yew can't be good at everything.
Chris:Maybe he's a bad kisser?
Jake: No, he's good at that too.
Clarisse and Chris: What?
Jake: What?
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bellamer · 11 months
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Mauga: Baptiste told me that I wasn’t “romantic enough” with him
Sombra: That’s petty.
Mauga: Exactly ! Like bitch I’m not romantic ?!? I ate six cookies out of his ass and I’m not romantic ?!?
Sombra, spitting her water out: I-
Mauga: I don’t give a fuck what he was talking about, I’m romantical as fuck !
Sombra: YOU WHAT ?!?
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