#incorrect overwatch

[cassidysboots]

Cassidy: I cut my finger Y/N: I can kiss it so it'll get better Cassidy: That works? Y/N: Yeah my mum used to do it when I was little *later* Cassidy: I need you to punch me in the mouth

Ashe: Fucking finally

[sleeplessdreamer14]

(Name): Jamison, you’ll eat anything.

Junkrat: What? I won’t eat anythin’, I’m pretty discerning.

(Name): (holding small piece of something) Eat this.

Junkrat: (immediately takes it and eats it) Wot was that?

(Name): (holds up a sponge with a small chunk missing)

Junkrat: Don’t feed a guy a sponge, (Nickname)!

(Name): (chuckling) You-

Junkrat: Don’t feed a guy a sponge!

(Name): You put it in your mouth, Jamie!

Junkrat: Ughh!

[marksider89]

Widowmaker, to Emily: Mon dieu, you're beautiful.

Tracer: Um, she has a girlfriend.

WIdowmaker: She deserves two.

[dawnthefox24]

*Everyone avoiding the wrath of Cassidy because he was having a shitty day today and today was the last straw for him* Cassidy:*kicks the chair with all of his might*FUCK THE CHAIR. PARDON ME FOR MAKING MYSELF COMFORTABLE DURING A SINCERE HEART TO HEART DISCUSSION WITH A DEAR FRIEND IN NEED! Cassidy: *breaks a few items in the process as well* BUT THE TIME HAS COME FOR ME TO CEASE STRADDLING THIS DEEPLY OFFENSIVE PIECE OF FURNITURE! AWAY WITH YE, FOUR LEGGED TEMPTRESS! DISTRACT US NO MORE WITH THE MOST BASIC AND UTILITARIAN FORM OF COMFORT YOU SUPPLY! *Mercy is watching this unfold in front of her before the scene changes like in the office* Mercy: Cassidy just threw a tantrum about a chair.I just won Cassidy Tantrum Bingo. Genji and Pharah owe me so much money. *Cuts to Genji and Pharah* Genji and Pharah: We owe Angela so much money...

[bardsexlovers]

Genji : “I dare you to kiss the first person who walks in the room.”

Cassidy : “I'm not kissing any-”

Hanzo walking in : “Hello Cassidy, Genji”

Cassidy standing up : “Well, a dare's a dare”

[tricksterlatte]

Lifeweaver: Well, Satya, how do I look?

Symmetra, trying to use gay slang she knows he would appreciate: This outfit makes you look like a cunt.

[venturerockeater]

Roadhog: Tell them ‘you have beautiful eyes’

Junkrat: *Turns to Venture* I have beautiful eyes

Venture:

Roadhog:

[hannah-the-red-head]

Mauga: Yep! Sometimes I gotta beat the simps off me with a stick! Mauga: *frantically swinging a long stick at a mob of rabid Overwatch fans* BACK! BACK I SAID!

[surrendertomywheeeeze]

A few weeks ago, after a couple of drinks, Moira made a bet with Gabriel Reyes: If she ever lost to him in a fight, she'd have to print a picture of him on every pillowcase she owns.

Little did she know back then that her HP would get nerfed, and she'd eventually have to face the Reaper cushions.

[nightmaresart]

Genji: Why do you get to be in charge? Why can't we take turns?

Hanzo: Because I'm the oldest

Asahi: Yeah? Well you're also the gayest so I think i should be in charge

[sharkaiju]

Roadhog: If we're gonna work together, you're gonna have to learn to aim.

Junkrat: Aim is my middle name!

Junkrat: ...Actually, it's the middle part of my first name!

[cassidysboots]

Cassidy: Crushes are the worst. Whenever I’m near mine, I start acting stupid. Hanzo: You always act stupid. Hanzo: Hanzo: Wait…

[lovingoverwatchguys]

I like making in-universe tweets. They're fun.

[marksider89]

Emily: Is Amélie still mad at you?

Lena: Yeah. But she misses me.

*A bullet whizzes past Lena*

Lena: Her aim is gettin better, though.

[dawnthefox24]

Mauga: Lifeweaver you can’t move in with Baptiste. Lifeweaver: Why not? Mauga: Well, um, how are you going to feel when he see you without any makeup? Lifeweaver: I’m not wearing makeup right now. Mauga:*Quickly grabs his hands* Holy crap, you’re beautiful.

[bardsexlovers]

Cassidy: Gabriel, how do you feel about me

Gabriel: I’d certainly greet any guy you brought home with a shotgun if that’s what you’re asking

Cassidy: Aww-

Hanzo, quickly leaving the room: I need body armor

Gabriel: WHAT?!

Sombra: Wow… need me to get your shotgun-?