#OH i forgot to get dressed. so cool. i'm going to get such a good grade in Social Skills

[skarnish]

interviews in 45 min. it will be an hour and a half of staring at a screen and hoping desperately that microsoft teams continues to have mercy on me. auuughhh

[pomefioredove]

If you're still taking requests, I think something funny would be Idia w a reader/yuu that, in the middle of listening to him ramble (with lovey dovey eyes bc they like listening to him <3) just says. Would. Or like I want you. Like they didn't notice they were saying that out loud and now Idia and them are both dying but Ortho is just like OMG ITS HAPPENING FINALLY EXITING STAGE LEFT! hahdhahshsh I hope you get what I'm saying, completely fine if not!

I got u anon

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ slip of the tongue

type of post: fic characters: idia additional info: romantic, reader is gender neutral, reader is yuu author's note: I know very little about video games so I stole a lot of idia's dialogue from my boyfriend. if he sees this. um. hi baby

"The designs are pretty good. I mean, they fit the same three molds, but they're unique, you know?"

Idia shows you his screen again, rolling his gaming chair to the side so you can get a better look at the game he's been explaining to you for half an hour.

"The fighting is kinda button-mashy, but the graphics are cool enough, so I don't really care,"

You haven't gotten so much as a word in for almost ten minutes now, but that doesn't bother you. You like listening to him talk.

He goes back to the game menu to show you the special features, and then to the menu again. His long, nimble fingers dance across his keyboard, as if he were made for this, and he pulls up another screen with a lot of numbers in colored text.

"The game is free, but it's got an insane file size for it. 180gb. Nothing should be that big,"

Your thoughts become a little louder as you zone out, letting his words, heavy with tech jargon and fast with excitement, become music. You can't always keep up with Idia when he starts going on tangents like this. Usually you have questions, but now, you can't think of any. You're looking more at him than the screen. He's being distractingly cute today.

You sigh, letting your thoughts rest on the tip of your tongue, and without meaning to:

"Would,"

Idia's hands jump off the keyboard, and he goes still. Oh. Shit.

He wasn't supposed to hear that.

He slowly turns to look at you, his eyes widened, his face beet-red. In your defense, you really thought he wasn't listening.

You don't say anything. Either of you. You wait. He waits. His computer eventually powers down, making the room a little darker. Finally, Idia looks away.

"...I forgot what I was saying," he mumbles.

Weird. Okay, he's just going to ignore that? Is that good or bad?

You look away, too. "Something about the file size. I think you were-"

"Did you mean that," he asks, but it's not exactly a question. More like a demand for an answer.

"Um..." you say, looking at the floor. "...Yeah, I did."

Idia narrows his eyes at you. He's quiet, studying you, your expression, your body language. For what, you don't know. Maybe he thinks you're lying. Whatever it is, though, he doesn't say.

"...Okay," he finally says, turning back to his monitor. "Well... um... at least give me some warning next time, or something. I would've dressed nicer."

You blink. Next time. "...Yeah. Okay. Next time, then,"

[john-get-the-salt]

Packed Lunch (w/spencer reid)

Imagine: One morning Spence is in a rush to leave for work and forgets his lunch. You know he gets cranky when he gets hungry, so that only leaves one option.

Contains: secret relationship becoming not so secret anymore, funny Rossi, cute domestic Reid

It'd been exactly 39 minutes since Spencer left for work and you hadn't moved a muscle, standing and glaring at the bag sitting on the counter. It wasn't that the bag itself had offended you, as it was in fact just a harmless brown paper bag. What did offend you, was that it wasn't with Spencer like it should be. The packed lunch was no good if Spencer didn't pack it with him to work.

He'd been in such a rush leaving that morning that he zipped out the door without it. Whenever he stayed the night at your place you made sure to pack him a lunch, knowing that he wasn’t always the best at caring for himself.

Forgetting to bring lunch wasn't usually a big deal for most people. You knew that the federal building where he worked had a cafeteria.

But this was Spencer Reid you were talking about. And Spence hated the cafeteria food. On the occasion he forgot his lunch he'd just go the entire day living off coffee and whatever snacks were hidden in his desk. Then he’d go back to either his apartment or yours, starving and with a nasty headache.

This meant without his lunch he would most likely not be eating today. And as you thought about how stressed and overworked he'd been lately, that did not sit well with you.

So it was decided. You would drop his food off.

He was just in the office for the day as far as you knew, so you were moderately sure you could just leave it with the front desk or something and have them take it up to him.

The two of you had been dating for several months but agreed to keep it secret from his coworkers for now. Spencer was adamant that in his line of work he could never have any secrets, and for once he wanted to have something all to himself. You couldn't even begin to understand how he did what he did, so that was an easy request to grant.

You had since then discussed telling his co-workers about your relationship as you two became more serious, but the right time hadn't come up yet. Plus it made you giggle when he told you the tales of his co-workers trying to set him up or making fun of his lack of romantic life.

This all meant you couldn't just stroll into the building and announce to everyone that you were dropping food off for your boyfriend, Spencer Reid. You would need to quickly and discretely drop the food off and then be gone without a trace.

No harm in that at all. Right?

You quickly got dressed and grabbed the lunch. Living within walking distance of the BAU headquarters was extremely handy, especially today. It was a nice day and you enjoyed the weather as you walked.

It only took about 15 minutes before you were pulling the doors to the government building open, immediately being hit with a rush of cool air. The inside was full of people who looked like they really meant business in their fancy suits and stern faces. You sudden felt self conscious in your normal ‘civilian’ attire, and scurried up to the front desk to get this over with.

The lady at the front desk seemed disinterested, and barely looked up when you stopped in front of her.

"Can I help you?"

"Hi, yes. I was hoping I could drop off this food for my boyfriend. He works here and forgot it this morning and he always gets cranky when he's hungry and-"

"Ma'am we don't deliver food."

"I know I just-he's going to be hungry and I can tell you what department he works for and maybe someone could run it up to him real quick."

She pulled open a binder from her desk, sighing heavily. "Can I get his name and your name?"

"Oh, um, his name is Spencer Reid, and mine is but I don't work here I'm-"

"Here. You're already a registered visitor."

She handed you a clip on badge with Visitor printed on it in big bold letters. "Give that to security, then elevators are to the left and there's a directory on the wall. Have a good day."

Before you could even argue she was dismissing you and addressing the person in line behind you. So you forced your feet to move and head towards security. You felt like a fraud walking amongst agents and other government workers, and you kept your gaze down to avoid eye contact. After your purse got checked and your visitor badge got scanned you shuffled to the elevators.

You paused in front of the directory on the wall, squinting at the dozens of names listed. Where the fuck was the BAU?

You must've looked as confused as you felt, as someone stopped beside you.

“Ma'am? Do you need help finding something?"

You turned towards the voice, coming face to face with a kind-looking older man.

"Oh! I do actually, if you wouldn't mind."

"Of course, what department are you looking for?"

"Um, the BAU?"

"Well I can definitely help you there."

He pressed the elevator button and the two of you waited for a moment before the doors opened and the elevator emptied. He gestured forward and you gave him an appreciative smile before stepping in. He followed along with a few other people. It remained quiet as the elevator rose and stopped at occasional floors, people getting in and out.

Eventually it stopped at floor 6 (totally making this up idk) and the man announced this was the stop.

You followed him off the elevator and onto a floor that was still busy, but nearly as much as the lobby. Straight ahead, down a little hall, were a set of glass doors with BAU printed on the front. You chewed on your lip as you stared the door down, contemplating.

How were you going to casually drop Spence's lunch off without creating suspicion? You couldn't exactly just walk right in and hand it to him without people questioning who you were.

"Can I help you find anyone in particular?"

"Oh no that's okay, you've helped plenty. I don't want to keep you from your business."

"Please, what kind of gentleman would I be if I didn't help?"

This was so not the plan. But what other option did you have? You hadn't accounted for this scenario, you were positive you wouldn't make it past the front desk. But now here you were, and you needed to make sure this food got to Spence. Plus it probably wasn't smart to aimlessly wander around an FBI building. With your luck someone would think you were a terrorist or something. And you were not a terrorist.

"I didn't think you were, but my confidence in that is now wavering."

Oh my god. You said that last part out loud. To an FBI agent.

“Oh god I’m so sorry, I did not mean to say that out loud. I swear I’m not a terrorist. I have this terrible habit of saying dumb things when I’m nervous.”

Could this get any worse? All you wanted to do was drop your boyfriends lunch off and now you were talking about terrorism with an FBI agent.

To your relief, the man just chuckled. “Don’t worry about it, I’ve heard plenty worse. Now who are you looking for?”

At this point you were ready for the earth to just swallow you whole and you were deeply regretting ever leaving the apartment.

“Spencer Reid,” you said simply as you held up the bag in hand. “I have his lunch.”

“Spencer? He’s just through these glass doors, follow me.”

At this point, you didn’t care who saw you. You didn’t care that it sounded like this man knew Spence, and may or may not think you are a terrorist.

You just wanted fo give Spence his lunch and get the fuck out of dodge.

Following the stranger through the glass doors, you found yourself in a much quieter area. The entrance led out onto a catwalk from where you could see clusters of desks below you and a little coffee bar against the wall.

"I'll just set the lunch over here-"

"(Y/N)?"

You looked up at the voice and found your boyfriend standing below you at a desk, a concerned look on his face. He left the group of people he was standing with and jogged up the steps towards you.

"Hey, is everything ok? Did something happen? Are you ok?" His eyes were wide with concern, words coming out fast as he glanced over you. His hands automatically reached for yours, something the two of you did without thought.

"I'm fine, my love. You just forgot your lunch," you held up the paper bag. "I tried to drop it off at the front desk but the lady just gave me this pass and told me to bring it up. Then I almost got lost but this nice guy stopped and helped but I was so nervous I accidentally said something about terrorism and I know I shouldn't drop by unannounced but I also know how cranky you get when you're hungry and I-"

"(Y/n)," he cut your anxious rambling off, smiling in relief that everything was ok. "Thank you."

You smiled back up at him, relieved he wasn’t upset. "You're quite welcome. And I must say I feel so official with my badge even though I absolutely do not belong here."

He laughed. "I think you fit right in."

"Well I-"

"Reid?"

You both froze and became suddenly re-aware of the current setting. You looked up at your boyfriend with wide, worried eyes.

Spencer sighed, though that dopey smile of his remained on his face. "I think our secret is out."

He intertwined his hand in yours and together you turned towards the voice. Standing with varying looks of confusion and smugness were a group of people you recognized as his co-workers.

"Who's this?"

Spencer cleared his throat. "Um, guys this is… my girlfriend."

You gave a hesitant wave, trying not to shrink under the intimidating gazes. The office was quiet for a moment, before someone else burst into the room

"Did Reid just say girlfriend?!"

"That's correct, babygirl," one of them spoke up. "Pretty boys got himself a girlfriend."

The blonde gasped, before rushing forward and grabbing you into a hug.

"It is SO nice to meet you!"

You laughed as you hugged her back.

“It's lovely to meet you too, Penelope. All of you.”

She released you and you turned towards the rest of the team.

“Spence is always showing me pictures and talking about you guys, I hope you understand us wanting to keep it quiet for a while. But I've been really looking forward to meeting you."

A man with a stern look in his eye stepped forward, holding out a hand. "Aaron Hotchner," his eyes seemed to soften as you shook his hand. "Nice to finally meet you."

That broke the rest of the team out of this trance and they all gathered forward to formally introduce themselves. You shook everyone's hands and giggled as they ogled at the fact that Spencer had caught himself a girlfriend.

You learned, with a laugh, that the man who'd helped you find your way was in fact David Rossi, one of Spence's coworkers. I’m your anxious mess you hadn’t recognized the man.

You explain to everyone that you were just dropping off Spencer's lunch, but you weren't getting away that easily.

Penelope and JJ convinced you to stay, and you all spent the lunch break sitting around a conference table chatting. Hearing stories about Spence on the job had you cry laughing and you happily indulged his friends in some stories of your own.

The entire time Spencer kept a tight hold of your hand, smile never wavering as he watched his favorite people laugh together.

His family.

[lunavrse]

DREAM GIRL

CHARLES LECLERC

summary ★ : charles decides to take a page out of justin bieber's book. let's see how that works out for him.

category ★ : smau.

notes ★ : disregard all times and dates, they don't matter. all spelling mistakes are intentional. everything is fake and unrealistic but thank you delusion. terrible flirting and the usual type of jokes/language you see on the internet.

me basically:

tagged: yourbestfriend

Liked by yourbestfriend, yourfriend, user61 and 147 272 others

youruser so proud of ﹫yourbestfriend, she absolutely killed it and even took some cool pictures of me💚🥂 new video coming 🔜

View all 534 comments

yourbestfriend thank you for coming my love💚

youruser always😘

yourbestfriend it's not hard when you have such a gorgeous subject

youruser thank yewww

user6 stunning 😍

user12 you look amazing and ﹫yourbestfriend did fantastic!

user89 THE DRESS🤩

youruser i knowww, it's from meshki

user3 you're a beauty

user62 i need to know where the dress is from 🙏

youruser it's from meshki !

user56 can't wait to stare at the screen for the next few hours

user47 isn't her videos usually like 20~45 minutes?

user56 i know what i said

user1 oh !

user9 she did her big one😌

user11 pretty!

yourfriend serving face and body

youruser 🤍🤍🤍

user24 face card is lethal

user61 ﹫charles_leclerc

user60 ❤️🔥

user77 can we get a little commotion for the dress🗣️🗣️

Liked by pierregasly, user61, landonorris and 516 382 others

charles_leclerc who is she? if anyone knows, please tag her.

View all 3 272 comments

user4 nah, this guy

user26 this is crazy.

user92 WHAT IS GOING ON ?!!?!!

user5 is this real? like am i actually seeing this?

user15 he's got to have been hacked

user25 ain't no way

user13 actively going insane thanks to this actually.

user8 giving me flashbacks to december 8th, 2015

user14 i've got ptsd 😭

user10 from what? the war?

user49 bros acting like they were in a war💀

user8 it was a tough time to be a jb fan 😭

user3 IM CRYING

maxverstappen1 is this who we are, is this what we represent??

user3 max is done💀💀

charles_leclerc i said i had a plan, not that it was a good one mate

user1 wish it was me he's looking for

user45 that's me!

user86 in your dreams maybe

user58 get over yourself<3

user20 ﹫youruser

user67 She's so pretty, I want to cry

user76 she's so pretty, i want her

user48 ^^two types of people

user93 my brother in christ, stand up!!!

user50 BRO FORGOT HE'S FAMOUS😭🔥🗣️

user07 he's just like me fr

user84 mans is moving mad📢

user100 this is embarrassing

user34 think im gonna be sick

user30 don't be so dramatic

user51 i don't blame her

user70 she's obviously the prettiest girl ever🙄

user68 ﹫youruser !

user97 that's me !

user59 I'm gonna go cry myself to sleep now

user31 side eye

user29 who is she? she's stunning

user40 why is my fav youtuber in this picture

user46 iconic actually

user17 I know we can't see her face clearly, but she's serving

user21 i know her!

user37 what's her ﹫

user21 it's ﹫youruser, i follow her

user101 i want harry styles to do this but with me

user88 me too lol

user65 this is down bad behaviour

user201 thanks for ruining my day 👍

user248 it's giving wattpad vibes

user119 charles, look at me, this isn't you, think about the kids

user996 i was genuinely scared this was a hard launch

user123 alexa play that should be me

user8 how ironic

user147 ﹫youruser

user313 that's my girlfriend ﹫youruser

user05 praying for this girl cause the toxic charles fans, yikes😬

user000 gonna be delusional and pretend it's me 😁

user128 see i was so excited when i saw the notif and now i'm just 😐

user01 i cried when i saw this post btw

user306 imagine he posted a pic of asking who u are ﹫user43

user43 pls i would cry

user61 ﹫youruser

user007 idk and idc

user400 this is me if you even care

Liked by yourbestfriend, charles_leclerc, user4 and 253 953 others

youruser hello new people, where'd y'all come from?

View all 1 753 comments

yourbestfriend do you not check your notifications or...

youruser you know i don't

user245 girl...

user4 im in love with you lol

user500 just came from ur yt video, i'm so glad you had fun at the event!

user16 so this is the girl my husband is leaving me for🥲

user04 charles leclerc in her likes😭😭😭 ooh i'm sick

user287 then you're not gonna like this... he's flirting w her

user04 just fell to my knees in despair

user61 so real for that last slide

user56 pretty😍

youruser tysm pretty girl🤎

user791 charles mfing leclerc posted you!?!!!

user792 charles mfing leclerc liked!!

user793 charles mfing leclerc commented!!!

friend3 let's kiss 💋

youruser 👩🏾‍❤️‍💋‍👩🏾

user005 i too wish to kiss all the pretty girls

user800 idk what's going on rn but i loved your latest video, you and yourbestfriend were so cute and seeing you guys backstage together was sooo wholesome

user494 the part where they saw each other and started hyping each other up was my favourite

use712 her looking up a makeup tutorial 2 hours before she had to leave was so me

user55 he's in her likes y'all!

user942 thanks bud, i would never had noticed without u

user039 oh so she's dumb and ugly 😒

user44 and you're bitter and jealous...

user91 CHARLES LECLERC KNOWS YOU EXIST

use222 I wanna kiss you too 😞

user777 personally, i came from yt

user420 hi *louder than everybody else*

user311 what lip liner are you wearing babes?

youruser ﹫makeupbymario brown lip liner : )

user42 need a makeup tutorial!!!

charles_lerclerc my fault 🧍‍♂️

youruser i'll let it slide cause you're cute

charles_leclerc you think i'm cute? giggling, kicking my feet

youruser and blushing?

charles_leclerc mhmm, yeah

user0 THEY'RE FLIRTING!!!!

user456 deffo flerting

user942 YEAH?!???!!!!

user011 you guys know dms exist right???

user0 damn, i wanted to see this play out more 😭

user811 chill, my man is on this app

user35 she a baddie she know she a ten

user555 face card is never declining 😍

user411 do i want to date you or be you?

user87 so real!

user05 so we all saw them flirt right?

user942 yes😭

user28 STAY AWAY FROM HIM

user69 GET A JOB (directed to you user28)

Liked by charles_leclerc, yourbestfriend, user12 and 443 854 others

youruser day(s) n night(s)

View all 2 748 comments

user103 nottt her trying to be sneaky👀

yourbestfriend am i seriously losing you to a MAN???

youruser 'm always urs pooks💚

yourbestfriend tell loverboy that

user656 charles' new nickname is 🔥

user48 the way charles was here in the first few minutes of her posting💀

charles_leclerc et le prix de la plus belle fille te revient [and the award for the most beautiful girl goes to you]

youruser merci beau garçon

user12 Them speaking French to each other is all that I'm thinking about rn.

user707 A YT MAN?!?!?! IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME!!!

user349 wish she was calling me a beautiful boy 😭

use117 i see you 4th slide, studious queen🤧

user824 charles try not to be a simp challenge

user107 level : IMPOSSIBLE

user41 ﹫user23 50 quid that's charles

user23 do you think i'm stupid?

user41 do you want an honest answer or?

user23 do you want to tell me your lastest test score or?

user41 ...

user23 yeah that's what i thought

user662 noooo pls don't be who i think it is

user35 she a baddie with her baddie friend(s)

user723 okay but the lashes ate💅🏾

user991 this is so weird, why are you posting him?

user75 you don't even know if that's him and you're already being defensive over a man who don't want you or even know you exist? don't pmo. get off her page!!!

user940 me when😔

user129 what about us?

user130 what about everything we've been through

user329 who is that man girl

user477 so are we just gonna ignore charles' comment or...

user452 just made me even more sure that it's him

user02 pretty girl<3

user170 if my future boyfriend don't bring me flowers on the first date, i don't want him🙅🏽‍♀️

user244 we get it, for some reason charles leclerc wants you😒

user311 ugh,,, the lip look always eats

user710 real, I'm obsessed

user536 is that charles?

user537 be serious, that is not happening

user539 ok 😐👍

user536 i actually can't be sirius, he's dead. hope this helps👍

user863 imagine that's not him and we're all just being crazy

user37 if that's not him, he's probably crying

user11 shittt, I would too, look at her

user29 he's probably the guy in the photos

user163 we all saw that interview right? it's definitely him

user288 yass, he looked so cute

user565 enough about charles, can we focus on how pretty she and her friends are??

user479 10s across the board fr

user504 I thought you were for the girls 😭

user716 i'm calling it now, that's a date w leclerc

user231 you look stunning 😍

user406 anyone noticed how he liked? he wouldn't do that if she went out on a date with someone else right?

user410 only everybody with eyes?

alex_albon yeah, no, he would be sobbing in a corner if that wasn't him

user410 ARIANA (Alex) WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE

use535 so he couldn't have fumbled, right....

user534 well...

user210 alex is just here to create chaos and honestly, i respect that

user73 please don't post your man again😒

user66 real!!! i come here to see you not him🥲

user711 love to see women getting treated right 😌

user385 slide 6 made me sick to my stomach

user858 he brought her flowers😫

user132 PLEASE DON'T BE IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE

user705 that HAS to be him

user701 you never know, sometimes he is his own worst enemy

user898 did NOT 🚫❌ like this

user999 what if this was my last straw

tagged: charles_leclerc, youruser

Liked by user, pierregasly, user0 and others

allthingsleclerc local (monégasque) man seen out with mystery woman who sources claim is yn

View all 843 comments

user624 why is she still serving while blurred

user210 liked by pierregasly 🫣

user833 charles' friends are exposing him 💀

user0 that's definitely ﹫youruser

user04 serving cunt and he's there ig

user547 just becoz it's blurred doesn't mean you can't tell that it's her

user622 he looks miserable, he doesn't like her😭

user595 what? are you of sound mind?

lunavrse pls don't look too closely at the picture 😴

user923 What's the square root of 64?💅🏾

user700 they're just minding their business, why can't y'all do the same?

user674 it's a public place

user700 ☝️🤓 it's a pUbLIc PLaCe

user103 no bc they're lowk matching 😭

user933 it's so over😭😭

user72 that's so cute🥰 who wants to have a sleepover on the highway with me?

user33 that could just be a coincidence?

user172 i actually don't care but THAT DRESS, i need to know where she got it from

user32 oh ! i didn't realise that she was actually his type

user79 ... i wish there was a side eye emoji

user18 oh that's not-

user32 nonono in a sense that he usually dates like brunettes

use499 wdym, 'm pretty sure she is brunette?

user03 we know what you meant lol

user270 wish i could live in delusion

user320 he's probably paying for everything 🙄

user419 and? he's literally a millionaire, if he wants to spend his money on his (alleged) girlfriend let him. it's not your money

user232 girl, pipe down

user890 I don't see the problem?

user52 why do you assume that? do you know her financial situation? or you a close friend of either of theirs who knows what's going on? if the answer to these questions are no, shut the fuck up, thanks<3 peace and light to you.

user562 try not to say mother

user587 [failed]

user612 Why can't she stay away from him?

user258 why can't you mind yr business?

user718 first picture of them out together and they look great

user106 her rn: damn i'm the only bitch serving cunt here😭😭 omg😭 i'm so embarrassedd😭😭😭

user211 she should be at the club, not on gossip pages😭

user261 fuck she looks too good, i wanna kms

user211 real

user586 took a social media break and came back to this😃 great !

user404 i wanna say parents🤭

user648 this actually made my day

user446 Gonna sleep on the tracks tonight🥰

youruser and you're kenough for me❤️

charles_leclerc thank you barbie !

most beautiful barbie ever❤️

landonorris this ken's job is simp

charles_leclerc you'd be a simp too if you could actually date such a stunning woman but you can't 🫶

landonorris you're a cruel, cruel man

Liked by charles_leclerc, yourbestfriend, lilymhe and 749 365 others

youruser me gusta la mar🏖️

View all 2 836 comments

yourbestfriend wish i was on a boat right now😔

youruser i literally invited you and you said no?

yourbestfriend i have to face unimaginable horror (work)

user12 that boat looks familiar

yourbestfriend you look stunning babes💚

youruser tysm, means the most coming from uuu pookie 💚

use501 forget about charles and give me one(1) chance pls

charles_leclerc me gustas tú

user779 SCREAMING

user784 chill, it's a song lyric

user779 yeah but have you heard the song???

charles_leclerc gorgeous view, and the sea looks good too i suppose

youruser my view was much better but thank you<3

charles_leclerc i doubt that. je pourrais te regarder pendant des heures sans jamais me lasser. [i could look at you for hours and never get bored]

user055 someone is coming for your smooth operator title ﹫carlossainz55

user964 Charles Rizzclerc???

yourbestfriend she's screaming btw

youruser no i'm not

yourbestfriend then why do i have a vn of you screaming?

charles_leclerc 😊

user96 it's quiet🤐... no back talk

user71 stay focused my brothers, we must stay focused

user53 i am looking respectfully, i promise

user131 when will someone tell me the things he says to her🙃

user677 everytime you post a picture my jaw drops

yourfriend oh my gorgeous coco butter melanated caramel skinned goddess, please notice me🙏🏾

youruser oh you've got jokes🤨

yourbestfriend GOODBYE😭 im showing this to ur man

yourfriend you really thought you did suttin🤣 he knows who he's dating😋

user22 I would sacrifice my favourite duck plushie for just one chance to be in your presence 🙇‍♀️

youruser that's so sweet yet so disturbing pls keep your plush safe

user22 Yes queen, whatever you say 🫡

user803 if you look close enough, you can see me drowning myself in the ocean 🤗

user70 forget vroom vroom boy n give a g(ay)irl a chance😫

user312 charles in his simp era

use314 love to sea it

user312 that's a terrible pun and i hate that i laughed

user2 you know who has a boat??? charles

user057 the way that you're actually glowing in these🫠

user717 i love the hat, it just kinda brings the whole thing together

lilymhe you look amazing! and i love the bikini!

youruser tysm🫶🏾 i love u!!!

user742 a friendship i never knew i needed

user335 Since when did Lily and Yn know each other??

user386 since they're both wags, it only makes sense

user360 but yn's not a wag

user386 yet

user109 hi lol

user634 her body is teaaa

user7 did someone say body-ody-ody-ody

user19 he can do so much better than you

user482 I know you want him but I can be so much better than him in so many ways, I swear, please please please please *begs excessively*

user888 Does Charles have her post notifications on or what?

user938 i'd say yes cause how else would he like her posts so fast

user064 the swimsuit is everythinggg

user229 it's giving hot girl summer ⛱️

user177 i could start a whole new ocean with the amount of tears i've cried

Liked by user621, youruser, pierregasly and 927 375 others

charles_leclerc me gusta el viento

View all 3 276 comments

user905 he knows exactly what he's doing

user200 Not him having the exact same meal picture as her

user080 let's talk about the matching captions

user621 most beautiful man I've ever seen

youruser me gustas tú

user331 Y'ALL ARE NOT SLICK

user331 in fact, you're both so sick for playing with us like this

user774 we know you like the wind, we've seen your hair

user405 jajajaja

user607 okay, you might have nibbled with this a little

user775 jail!!! do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars

user379 what she said wasn't even that bad nor untrue

youruser now THIS is a view. tu as ta place au louvre avec toutes les autres grandes œuvres d'art. (you belong in the louvre with all the other great works of art)

charles_leclerc oh ! thank you, i am so normal about you and this comment

pierregasly great, now he's glitching and going crazy in the group chat again

user2 AGAIN?!?

alex_albon spoiler alert ⚠️ he was not normal about this

user125 who blames him? not me. instead, i am insanely jealous

user457 WHY ARE THEY BOTH BREAKING OUT INSANE LEVELS OF RIZZ?

user508 oh he's so fine🤤

user933 the matching captions and matching replies,,, god I'm NOT your strongest soldier

user36 yesss king, give us beach!!!!

user078 well, boat but yes!!!

user649 he said im speeding up the soft launch

user573 by 0.25x speed

user649 at least it's something?

user378 honestly i will take these crumbs instead of absolutely nothing

user269 i LOVE crumbs 🤤 mmhmm😋

user120 is really considered a soft launch when they make comments like THAT?

user801 someone sedate me, im unwell🤒

user903 he's trying to thirst trap us into ignoring the 4th slide

user754 well it's working😫

user028 charles!!! te amo 😘

user753 gnawing at the iron bars of my enclosure like a rat/mouse with a giant block of cheese

user136 One like and I'll drown myself.

user112 why did you like it🤨

user136 Damn Nessa, mind ur business😐, why did YOU🫵🏽 like it?

user388 them posting sea/boat pics on the same day? THEY'RE TOGETHER

user33 hear me out, it could be a coincidence

user388 *shakes you violently* HOW MANY COINCIDENCES DO YOU NEED

user770 i think we're focusing a little too much on the wrong thing here

user911 if i said what i was thinking, i'd be banned from this app.

user762 can't wait to see you at the next race! praying for a podium finish🙏!

user63 Who are you taking pictures of Charles???

user894 Gee that's a tough one/s

user720 he didn't really think we'd ignore the 4th slide

user402 i am here to do some good ole fashion SLUT shaming🗣️📢

user309 Love them trying to out-compliment each other

user61 he has such a gorgeous smile

user7 actual post of you and ﹫youruser when?

user633 nobody wants to see that

use105 speak for yourself

user708 😍😍

user808 i don't know who's luckier, her or him

user809 both, both is good

user007 hope you're having fun destroying my heart😭😭

user169 charles please, please, do you need a dog because i swear i can bark. in fact i am barking and drooling violently rn

user196 you really get me

user45 he's taking pictures of me y'all 🫶🏼

user502 🥵🔥

user19 you can do so much better than her, i promise

user67 i cried a little when i saw your post of her was still up

user64 I feel like a Victorian man™ seeing a woman's ankle for the first time 😵‍💫

user664 feeling like how teachers think boys feel when seeing a girl's shoulders

user325 don't forget to keep applying sunscreen!

user04 he's so pretty, i'm sick to my stomach.

user758 he tryna kill people i swear

user99 honestly, i think he looks so at peace/happy and i'm grateful for that

user74 you're honestly ruining my life by not being mine 😭😭😭

user981 that looks like too much food for 1 person

user523 that's because im with him🤗

user296 screaming, crying, throwing up, banging my head against the wall, wailing like a banshee.

tagged: youruser

Liked by youruser, user291, landonorris and 973 638 others

charles_leclerc play all mine by brent faiyaz

View all 4 726 comments

user39 just fell to my knees in a Walmart

youruser this is not the soft launch we agreed on mon bijou

charles_leclerc just wanted to show you off mon ange

youruser oh !

user505 ALL MINE BY BRENT FAIYAZ!??!! oh it's really over 😭

landonorris can't even get picture creds for the 4th slide

user444 you didn't even get a reply 💀 everybody point 🫵🏼 and laugh

landonorris just looked at your bio and it says ln4, i really is your own fans😞

user528 can't believe she invented green 😮‍💨

user553 them in the photobooth, fuck, is it hot🥵🥵 in here orrr

youruser who is she???

charles_leclerc oh you know, just the love of my life

youruser kicking my feet, smiling SO hard right now. je t'aime, je t'aime, je t'aime.

charles_leclerc je t'aime encore plus mon ange❤️ (i love you even more my angel)

user378 The launch we've been waiting for

user957 the way they're looking at each other, parting my hair with a knife 🤪

youruser you're obsessed with me

charles_leclerc well, yes! am i not supposed to be??

user39 no shame in admitting it, i respect that🤷🏽‍♂️

user291 serving cunt like she got a master's degree in cuntology from servington universitea

user239 charles, can you fight because i feel like i'm gonna steal your girl

charles_leclerc ... you have five seconds to delete this🙂

user805 If I speak...

user806 charles would probably block you

user575 charlessss i can make you happier, trust me

youruser no, i don't think i will

user575 my bad girl, didn't think you'd see this.

maxverstappen1 you guys are so sickening, please get a room

charles_leclerc who even invited you???

youruser wow max, i thought you liked us

maxverstappen1 YOU DID

maxverstappen1 not enough to watch you both be so touchy sorry

yourbestfriend my stunning girl💚

charles_leclerc i think you mean, MY girl

yourbestfriend i'm not arguing with you, ﹫youruser please come get your man

youruser i think 'm gonna stay out of this...

user332 when will someone post me to my fav brent faiyaz song🫤

user333 manifesting getting posted to stay down 🕯️🙏🏾🕯️🙏🏾🕯️🙏🏾

user334 my wedding song frfr😩

user018 why did daddy's home start playing 🛐

user12 FINALLY

user618 is your girlfriend single?

charles_leclerc read that first part again for me

user466 KHCJTSURS 5HE HARED LAWNCH

user540 not one word spelt correctly, open the schools!!!

user843 who is cutting onions😭😭???

user785 HOW DOES IT FEEL TO LIVE MY DREAM

charles_leclerc feeling really blessed 🙏🏻

user912 this is so unserious 💀

user440 love love love 😘

user54 love a black woman from infinity to infinity!!!

user113 in the words of dove cameron, i could be a better boyfriend than him. trust🙏🏾

user53 NOOOO YN come back to meeee!!!

charles_leclerc i think she's good here, next to me

user17 can't breathe!!!

user17 hottest gf alive

user17 she looks too good i can't breathe 🫠

user27 showed this to my therapist and she's finally gonna let me kill myself

user065 to be shown off like this,,, i beg

pierregasly the fact that we were together in the last slide...

charles_leclerc but is this a friend group hard launch?

user513 call this hard launch an ugly twink the way it cannot be topped

use488 CALL IT WHAT NOW🎤🎤

user83 the wording is CRAZY

user48 not Charles beefing with everyone in love w his girl💀💀

user259 just bought a whole house with the 1st pic. her face card is insane

user613 kissin the screen😙

charles_leclerc kissing her👩🏾‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻

youruser ok that's enough

user613 oooohhhh you got scolded 🫵

user6 LETS GO TO PARIS😋

user084 the audacity to use that emoji, ijbol

user40 i hate you

user40 i'm sorry that was jealousy speaking, so happy for you❤️

user069 i - no words

user675 charles, I heard she throws rocks at orphans

charles_leclerc i'm not an orphan but she can hit me😊

arthur_leclerc NO SHAME😭

youruser i do not throw rocks at children, ﹫charles_leclerc hi

user675 yeah, i lied but he's something...

Liked by charles_leclerc, user61, yourbestfriend and 985 732 others

youruser think i like you best when you're just with me and no one else...

View all 4 662 comments

user73 didn't i say don't post your man 🥲

charles_leclerc who is that guy?

youruser he's just this guy i'm hopelessly in love with

charles_leclerc he's very lucky❤️

youruser we both are❤️

user23 we all know who it is girl🤣🤣🤣

charles_leclerc i can't believe you didn't post a single picture of me where my face is visible 😪

youruser i hate you, you know we agreed on the soft launch

charles_leclerc you hate me? so enemies to lovers😏

youruser 🤦🏾‍♀️

user704 she's so mean to him, what does he even see in her

user202 you know there's this thing called banter and he's a grown man who can make his own decisions?

user525 can't wait for the future videos of her at any of the grand prix races

user4 he's got a grip on you in every picture i've seen of y'all together so far, like chill lil bro, she's not gon run away🤣🤣🤣

user206 he's actually just like me bc if she was my girl...

yourbestfriend the best launch because we don't have to see his face

user180 ur so real ily

yourbestfriend jokes, but I'm happy for you both💚

youruser love you💚

user16 i'm so😭 happy😭 for you😭 both😭

user444 lover gyal era!

user407 must be nice to young, sexy and in love

youruser it really is🥰

user350 do y'all need a third, a dog, a maid, or anything really because i can do it all!

user110 shattered.

user12 feeling giddy asf like i'm the one who got posted😵‍💫

user61 you two look great together😊

youruser thank you aoife🤎

user61 you KNOW MY NE?$?$?_? SHE KNOWS MY NAME JEJEJEJ IM SCREAKING

user08 lord, i see what you've done for others 🙏🏼

user940 when will it be me.(with you)

charles_leclerc never, not even in the next thousand lifetimes 🤣

user838 CHARLES???

user839 OHMYDAYS?!?!

user516 the rope in my backyard looks so tempting

user133 I love k. so much

user48 feet? for free? in this economy?

lilymhe leave him for me, let's run away together💒

youruser packing my bags 🛍️

charles_leclerc ﹫alex_albon please come get your girlfriend

alex_albon lily... what is this

lilymhe as the saying goes, never let your boyfriend stop you from finding your wife

charles_leclerc NOT MY GIRLFRIEND THO

youruser boooo tomato tomato tomato i'm throwing tomatoes🍅🍅🍅

charles_leclerc mon ange???

user909 lily was cooking ♨️🍳

user102 remember everyone, he is NOT a mountain, he CAN be moved!

user00 Donatella VERSACE💜

user6 i love the eiffel tower

user315 because you're parisian, right????

user57 i don't think that's the reason💀💀

user510 do you want another boyfriend?

user204 i just think it really weird that you're not posting his face when he literally posted multiple pictures of you on his account, like what are you hiding?

user832 i think it's weird that you don't know how to mind your own business? like it's crazy that you think you're entitled to a reason. this is her account to do what she wants with it, even if she posted him, you'd complain. so please, just shut up.

user278 not my boyfriend having the audacity to steal my girlfriend from me🫤

user98 honestly if I looked like her, i would not know how to act

user122 facts

landonorris what is with you and your boyfriend not giving credit for pictures i take???

youruser this isn't about you right now🫶🏾

user444 at least you got a response this time

landonorris again, for someone who has ln4 in their bio, you sure like to bully me

user444 you think this is bullying? i can actually bully you if you want

landonorris no, i'm good👋🏻

user303 that one girl was right about you liking the wind a lil too much

user926 yeah this is cute and all but can i land this backflip off a cliff?

user376 those flowers are so pretty 🤍🎀

user401 driving home in the wrong lane tonight🤣

user527 the way i was right the whole time and now my friend owes me money 🥰

user830 you guys are such a cute couple

user010 this would have been such a good soft launch dump of we didn't see his hard launch 😅

youruser added to their story.

user09 posting a man to MITSKI?! oh it's serious, ur actually down horrendous

yourbestfriend hard launching on ur story when you soft launched in a post is crazyyyy🤣🤣

youruser hard launching when i see a ring 🤗

nah, im kidding but if they want to see him, go to his profile🤷🏾‍♀️

yourbestfriend IKTR 💅🏾

user215 now my man's gonna expect me to post him on my story like this😑 but i forgive you queen 🙄

landonorris finally made it in a post!

youruser finally you can stop complaining 🫶🏾

landonorris why are you and charles so mean to me

youruser because you deserve it, hope this helps🙌🏾

francisca.cgomez double dating with you was so fun! can't wait to do it again 💞

youruser yes! gonna go bother charles to make plans for another one soon 😁

user121 the sun drawing around ur eyes🥲 crying, that's so effin cute

yourfriend not you being all sentimental with the daniel caesar song AND the puzzle pieces

youruser damn, can't even do something nice🧍🏾‍♀️ see if i post you again

yourfriend you're so dramatic pookie

user531 the bear and the flowerss, please where can i get man like that😖

user479 so many gorgeous girls🥰

user06 glad you're surrounding yourself with people who make you happy and bring out this lovely light 🤎

yourfriend2 when the plans finally make it out the group chat🙌🏾🎉

youruser love that for us🤧 but i swear getting stuck in that elevator made me reconsider all my decisions leading up to that moment

yourfriend2 the 1st hour wasn't that bad tho

yourfriend3 we will never be free🙁

youruser please shut up😭😭

yourfriend3 no bc you didn't listen when dr umar said "SNOW BUNNIES NEVA🙅🏾‍♀️❌"

youruser i do not see it🧘🏾‍♀️

𖦹 𓂃 ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁⠀⠀𓂃 ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁⠀⠀𓂃 ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁⠀⠀𓂃 ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 𓂃 𖦹

⤷ end note ‧ ★ : halfway through making this i went "hmm, this should be a lando smau" but then i continued doing this. it posted like 5 times which freaked me out and was supposed to be done ages ago but yeah. also french is from deepl. enjoy.

[corruptedcaps]

What a drag

Anna was worried about her best friend Chloe. It wasn’t just that Chloe had started smoking, though that was odd enough. It was how the cigarettes seemed to changed her.

Anna first noticed it during one of their usual hangouts at their local coffee shop. Chloe lit up a cigarette, her fingers effortlessly handling it like it was something she did every day. There was something in the way she exhaled the smoke, how her eyes seemed to glitter with a new, almost unsettling confidence. At first, Anna thought it was just in her head, but as the days passed, it became impossible to ignore.

Chloe was more vain now, always checking her reflection, fussing over her hair, her clothes. She wore makeup Anna had never seen her use before. Seductive red lipstick, winged eyeliner, bold choices that made her look stunning but unlike her. She had started dressing differently too. Wearing dresses that barely covered anything, plunging necklines that showed off an impressive rack that Anna had never noticed before.

The looks Anna could have seen past but her attitude was changing from the kind and sweet girl Anna knew into some sort of vapid and arrogant 'it' girl that was more unrecognizable by the day.

Anna had started to suspect that all the changes had something to do with the cigarettes when she noticed that no matter how many Chloe smoked, the box always seemed full. At first, Anna dismissed it as a trick of the light or her own imagination. But the more she watched, the more convinced she became that something unnatural was going on. So she put together a plan to get her Chloe back.

One afternoon, while they were sitting in the park, Chloe excused herself to use the restroom, leaving her purse behind. Anna’s heart pounded as she saw the cigarette box peeking out. This was her chance. Quickly, she rummaged through her own bag, pulling out a regular pack of cigarettes she had bought earlier, just in case. With trembling hands, she swapped them, slipping Chloe’s strange, never-ending box into her own pocket.

When Chloe returned, she didn’t notice a thing. She took out a cigarette from the new box and lit it, but Anna could tell immediately that something was different. Chloe seemed puzzled for a moment, almost repulsed by the cigarette she was smoking. Her confident demeanor wavering slightly as she took another drag.

"Em, is it ok if we call it a day? I'm not feeling to good at the moment." Chloe asked rather sheepishly.

"Oh yeah of course, just text me when you get back." Anna said hugging Chloe and feeling the familiar embrace back. That was when she knew she had done the right thing.

Anna walked home with a sense of relief, convinced that Chloe's strange transformation would soon reverse. She had done what she needed to do. As she stepped through the front door, she called out, "Hi, Mom!"

"Hi, honey," her mother, Debra, replied from the kitchen. But then her voice sharpened with concern, "What’s that in your pocket?"

Anna froze. In the rush of swapping the cigarette boxes, she had completely forgotten about the one she had slipped into her pocket. She had meant to toss it out on the way home but had totally forgot. Guilt prickled her skin as she pulled out the mysterious pack, holding it awkwardly in her hand.

"They're not mine I swear! They’re Chloe’s." Anna stammered, her voice faltering under her mother’s piercing gaze. But Debra wasn’t buying it.

"Anna, don’t lie to me. I didn’t raise you to be liar, or a smoker!" Her mother said, her tone both stern and disappointed. "You’re going to sit here and smoke every last one of those, then you’ll realize smoking isn’t so cool."

Anna’s heart dropped. She opened her mouth to protest, to explain everything, to say how the cigarettes were somehow magic but even as she thought it she knew how ridiculous it sounded. Plus once her mother set her mind to something, she wouldn't budge. Debra was already setting up an ashtray on the table, her expression unyielding.

Anna hesitantly took out a cigarette, her hands trembling. As she lit it and took a drag, she was surprised by the taste. It was sweet and smooth, not at all what she expected. She understood now why Chloe was so put off of the pack she had switched. The smoke felt oddly comforting as it filled Anna's lungs, leaving her feeling almost...good. Relaxed. She took another puff, sinking deeper into the sensation.

But as Anna exhaled, something odd began to happen. Unbeknownst to her or Debra, her fingernails started to lengthen, growing into a perfectly manicured set painted red. They gleamed with an unnatural sheen, elegant and sharp, as if they had always been that way. Anna, lost in the sweet smoke, didn’t even notice the transformation.

Anna finished the first cigarette, exhaling slowly as the sweet aftertaste lingered on her lips. "Can I go now?" She asked in a slightly bratty tone.

But Debra crossed her arms, her expression firm. "No. You’re going to smoke every cigarette in that box, just like I said."

Rolling her eyes, Anna took out another cigarette and lit it. As she brought it to her lips and took a deep drag, more changes began to take place. Her chest started to swell, gradually expanding beneath her shirt, still unnoticed by either her or Debra. The sensation was so gradual, so natural, that it didn’t register as anything unusual.

Meanwhile, as the nicotine worked its way through her system, Anna’s thoughts began to shift. She found herself caring less about her mother’s disapproval and more about how good she felt. A sense of superiority started to creep in, an arrogant voice in her mind whispering that she deserved to do whatever she wanted and fuck the consequences.

Her mother wasn’t the only growing irritation in her as she started to feel her eyes were blurring. Taking off her glasses she found to her wonder that her eyesight was sharper than it ever was.

Without waiting for her mother’s instruction, Anna reached for another cigarette and lit it with practiced ease. It was becoming second nature to her now, the act of smoking feeling as natural as breathing. She inhaled deeply, the sweet smoke filling her lungs with a comforting warmth.

As she exhaled, her thoughts of her mother darkened. "Who is she to tell me what to do?" Anna thought, the arrogance growing stronger within her. A wave of irritation washed over her as she glanced at Debra, her mind swirling with mean, dismissive thoughts. “She’s just a jealous old hag. She’ll never understand what it’s like to be this… perfect.”

As Anna continued to smoke, the changes in her body accelerated. Her hair began to grow longer and thicker until it cascaded down her back in luxurious waves. Her waist subtly tightened, drawing in to create a more pronounced hourglass figure. Meanwhile, her lips softened and plumped, taking on a fuller, more seductive shape that made her face look almost doll-like.

As Anna stubbed out her cigarette, she didn’t hesitate before pulling out yet another. She lit it with a smirk, her eyes gleaming with a newfound superiority as she looked at her mother. The changes within her had solidified, leaving little trace of the shy, nerdy girl she once was.

Debra, seeing her plan backfire, grew alarmed. “It’s okay, Anna. You can stop now.” She said, her voice tinged with fear and regret.

But Anna refused, a mocking smile playing on her now-plump lips. “Oh, no, Mommy, you were right. I do need to be punished.” She purred, her tone dripping with sarcasm. She took a long, deliberate drag. She curled her lips into an ‘o’ and puffed out a perfect circle. The ring rising about her head like a sinister halo.

As Anna inhaled deeply, the smoke seemed to take on a life of its own, swirling around her body before seeping into her clothes. The baggy t-shirt she wore began to tighten, the fabric transforming as if molded by the smoke itself. It shrank and shifted, morphing into a tight, revealing black bodycon dress that clung to her newly sculpted tits, accentuating every curve.

At the same time, her face began to change even more dramatically. Thick makeup appeared, as if applied by an invisible hand. Dark eyeshadow that made her eyes smolder, sharp eyeliner, and deep pink lipstick that highlighted her now-plump lips.

Anna looked over at the nearby mirror and for a moment panicked at what she saw. Staring back at her was a gorgeous brunette wrapped in the tightest outfit she had ever saw. This wasn’t the nerdy and weak girl she saw every morning, no this was a wicked bitch who commanded respect.

Her shocked expression soon turned into an evil grin as she took another drag of her cigarette. She had been right, it was the cigarettes after all. They had made her into everything she feared Chloe would become and she loved it. Chloe's transformation had been slow because she had been unknowingly pacing herself. Anna had been forced to corrupt herself she was glad she had.

As Anna grabbed another cigarette and put it between her perfect lips, Debra reached out and snatched the box of cigarettes from Anna’s hand. She had finally clocked the transformation in her daughter. “That’s enough.” She said, her voice trembling with both fear and desperation. But as she glanced inside the box, her heart skipped a beat, it was still full, as if none of the cigarettes had been smoked at all.

Anna watched her mother’s reaction with a cold, detached amusement. She sat with her legs crossed, taking another drag out of her cigarette. “Give them back.” She said, her voice dripping with a calm, almost lazy menace.

“No, Anna! We need to find someone who can help you. This isn’t right, none of this is right.” Debra insisted, clutching the box tightly.

Anna’s expression remained unchanged as she let out a soft sarcastic sigh. She took a long, deliberate drag from her cigarette, exhaling a thick plume of smoke directly into her mother’s face. The smoke curled around Debra, who gasped and coughed as it invaded her lungs, forcing its way into her system.

“I said, give those back, Debra.” Anna repeated, her tone icy and commanding. Her use of her mother’s first name was chilling.

Debra’s resistance crumbled under the weight of Anna’s words. Her hands, once so firm in their grip on the cigarette box, trembled as she slowly extended it back to Anna. She didn’t understand why, but she felt compelled, almost powerless to do anything else. With a shaky breath, she handed the box over, her heart heavy with dread as she realized how much control she had lost.

Anna took the box in her long nailed hand, taking out another cigarette and lighting it off of the still unfinished one in her hand. She looked at the new cigarette light up with a subtle flash of pink. Somehow she knew that this would cause whoever smoked it to become her slave.

“Here Debbie, take a nice long drag.” Anna said holding out the cigarette for her mother to take. Again Debra felt incapable of refusing. Anna smirked darkly to herself as her mother reluctantly begin to smoke. Casually flipping over the box of cigarettes in her hand, she read the warning she hadn't noticed before, 'Contains Bitchotine.'

[nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos]

BIG OL HECKIN EDIT:

I am a dum dum who forgot how to spell @sassenach-on-the-rocks amid my existential terror and dread of the deleted-draft incident mentioned below, and then did a Dum Dum no Double-Down by forgetting to update until now. This headcanon is their brainchild and they deserve all the credit for it.

You may now continue with your previously intended brainrot viewing.

I'm VERY INCREDIBLY MIFFED, MY GUYS.

I had this entire post finished and almost completely formatted and saved it as a draft to finish formatting it on my computer

And it DIDN'T SAVE. And I nearly SCREEEEEMED.

It was for an ask request and I also can't seem to tag the person that sent the ask.

I am A N G E R Y

But after several deep breaths and reminding myself that violence is not the answer, here we are.

At any rate. The ask request was for headcanons involving One Piece boyos taking reader to a Masquerade ball.

To the asker, should you still be around to see it, I really really loved this and thank you so, so much for it ❤️❤️ I really enjoyed finding masks to match their aesthetics.

Only deviation I made was Zoro; you meet him there rather than going with him. It just felt right that way for some reason.

And awaaaaaaaay we go~

The Masquerade

Sanji, Zoro, Shanks, Mihawk, Buggy x Reader

SFW Headcanons

This was really so fun and cute and I thank Asker so so much for this.

♫♬Little By Little — The Fratellis♬♫

You wear your mask, I'll wear mine, they don't come cheap but they fit just fine

You can be her and I can be him, and we can both sink while the rest all swim

Sanji

He heard about it when you made port, and there's no way he's not taking you.

He's been looking for an opportunity to take you on the perfect first date, and this is it.

Perfect opportunity for the two of you to get away from the crew for and have a little alone time.

A little dancing, a little wine, a little champagne—it's perfect.

Makes sure not to tell anyone else, if Luffy hears there's free food he'll insist on going and the whole thing will no doubt end in chaos.

He doesn't even tell you—all he tells you, after presenting you with a brand new dress and jewelry (which most likely cost him every last berry in his wallet), is that he would like to take you out for the evening.

And how could you turn him down?

"Come on, love. I promise it will be the best evening you've ever had."

The effort he's already put in, those puppy-dog eyes....

You spend the evening dancing, talking, enjoying the free food, every ounce of his attention on you the entire time as he ensures that you feel like a princess.

Making sure that everyone has their eyes on the pair of you on the dance floor, that they know you're there with him.

Somehow ending up chit-chatting with the catering staff toward the end of the night and being invited to their far less formal after-party.

Stumbling back to the Merry hours later together, half-drunk and giggling and positive that it's the best night you've ever had.

Zoro

"What the hell...?"

He got lost and wandered in.

No idea what's going on, why are all these people wearing masks and dancing?? What exactly is going on this is weird as—

Oh hey there's an open bar, cool.

You recognize him from his bounty poster fairly quickly. There are a lot of marines here, and he really isn’t causing any problems, but he's getting a lot of strange looks...so you decide to do the guy a favor and shove a mask in his hands.

He looks at you like you're speaking another language as you explain where he is and convince him to just put on the damned mask already.

"A ball? I thought this was some kind of weird cult or something."

You just stare at him in disbelief—he thought it was a cult and he's just standing around enjoying the free drinks. 

What.

You brush it off and tell him if he wants to fit in, then dancing is probably a good idea.

He's frowning at you again.

"Yeah, I don't really...do that."

You roll your eyes—there are still people eyeing him suspiciously, you have to do something, so when he finishes his next drink you just grab him by the wrist and drag him out to the dance floor.

Cue impromptu ballroom dancing lessons. He keeps stepping on your feet and mumbling apologies, but it's kind of cute how hard he's trying.

You really can't help but giggle at his explanation that he just got lost and wandered in here.

But you're glad he did—you doubt you would have had nearly as much fun otherwise.

Shanks

Heard about the whole shin-dig while in port.

"Hey that sounds like fun, we should crash it."

You try to be stern, but he pulls out the puppy dog eyes.

"Oh come on please?"

God dammit....

And maybe an hour later you're both making masks.

There's glitter and glue and feathers all over the captain's cabin and you're already dreading cleaning it up.

His has a giant gaudy pirate hat. Because of course it has a giant gaudy pirate hat. He's so proud of it, grinning like a little kid in an arts and crafts class when he holds it up to show you, that you can't even bring yourself to admonish him for it.

And of course the whole thing is invitation-only, and of course he manages to sweet-talk his way in anyway.

Just having such a good time, really doesn't care if anyone recognizes him.

Really doesn't care, just drinking and making small talk and joking with several lower-ranking Marines in attendance who are clearly very nervous.

Within an hour, while you're in the middle of dancing and deciding that maybe this wasn't *such* a bad idea, an announcement is made for everyone to leave immediately.

Judging by the sheer number of Marines outside there's no doubt as to why.

He just gives you a guilty grin before picking you up over his shoulder and bolting back to the ship.

Mihawk

Actually received an invitation, just rolled his eyes and tossed it in the trash.

You dig it out and pout about it until he rolls his eyes and gives in.

"Fine. No more than an hour."

At lease there will be free wine.

Unsurprisingly spends a great deal of time standing in a corner and sipping said wine while staring around haughtily at the other partygoers.

Would much rather be drinking wine back in his secluded castle and not having to deal with other humans.

Spends the vast majority of the evening standing in a corner and nursing a glass of wine while glaring around haughtily at the other guests, daring them to even think of attempting to make small-talk with him.

Doesn't move from his designated corner until he sees other guests daring to flirt with you, at which point he promptly saunters over to pull you to the dance floor and ensure everyone is well aware that you're there with him.

Lightens up a little after that (which may or may not have something to do with the several glasses of wine he's already consumed), but absolutely will not admit that it actually turned out to be a rather nice evening.

He will, however, hold this over your head and remind you that you owe him.

But you know the truth, considering he's a little more willing to attend such events with you after this.

Buggy

Oh what now? An excuse to be absolutely flamboyant and unhinged in public?

You're going. Period. There will no arguments.

He's already got a collection of masks and costumes anyway, this is going to be a blast.

You lose track of him shortly after you get there. You're pretty sure that the explosion that went off toward the back corner of the dance floor had something to do with him.

He finds you while you're sipping a glass of champagne in downright annoyance and proudly informs you that he's made bank going through pockets at the coat check while everyone was distracted by his little diversion.

"Ah, don't worry, babe, they won't notice. They're too busy schmoozing and kissing ass."

Standing around making small-talk with other guests in the most ridiculous put-on aristocratic accent he can possibly muster, introducing you variably as some foreign dignitary or princess from a far off land.

Literally can't take this idiot anywhere.

[joeys-babe]

Joey B Blurbs: Angel Eyes

————————————————————————-

Summary: You attempt to prank Joe, but his angel-like eyes and all-convincing pout have your prank backfiring.

Warnings: Fluff, pranks!

Pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

Imagine Universe: Into the Mystic

A/N: Part 5 of blurb night!

————————————————————————-

No particular date for this blurb!

“Dinner time!” - you

Grinning as I paused the music playing over my speaker, I couldn't help but feel nothing but happiness watching my three boys run into the kitchen from the living room.

“Looks great, baby.” - Joe smiled

“Thanks, but I'm sure it won't look too good when you're cleaning it off plates later.” - you

“I don't care, that's our rule. If someone fixes it, the other cleans it. If we both cook, we both clean.” - Joe

I stood on my tiptoes and gave him a big kiss.

“Crap, I forgot drinks.” - you mumble, sighing

“You sit down, I’ll get ‘em.” - Joe

Before doing as Joe said, I got the twins into their booster seats and then sat down myself.

Joe walked back into the dining room just a moment later, his big hands allowing him to hold all four cups.

“Thanks.” - you

“Of course.” - Joe

Joe then put food onto all our plates, taking one of my hands in his when we started eating.

“Love you.” - Joe

“Love you too.” - you

——

After dinner, it was bath time for Tyson and Miles.

“We seriously need to order wet suits.” - Joe

“Why?” - you laughed

“They splash!” - Joe

“Oh, suck it up. Let's go.” - you

The tub was filled moments later, and Tyson and Miles climbed in. They were still young enough to bathe together - not like they would agree to do it separately anyway.

“Look!” - Tyson

Ty held up one of the plastic bath toys in Joe’s face, showing off his little tiger toy.

“That’s cool buddy. It’s like the mascot for the Bengals.” - Joe

“Yup!” - Tyson

Joe grabbed their mini basketball hoop out of the bath toy drawer and suction-cupped it to the shower wall.

“Can you make a basket, bubs?” - you

I handed Miles a mini-basketball, and he nodded and launched the ball across the shower.

Somehow making it in, Joe looked at me shocked.

“Gah-lee! Draft him to the league.” - Joe

“He’s got a cannon of an arm like his daddy does.” - you winked

Joe smiled and playfully rolled his eyes, handing Tyson a ball in the process.

“Let's start actually washing.” - you laughed

——

After getting the twins completely washed off and dried Joe and I headed to their room to get them dressed and ready for bed.

They wore matching pajamas, of course.

Miles and Tyson climbed into Tyson’s bed like they did every night for Joe to tell them a story. I laid down next to them and buckled up for the story Joe was about to tell.

“What kind of story do you guys want to hear tonight?” - Joe

“Lo- ve.” - Tyson

“A love story?” - you

Tyson nodded, so Joe continued.

“Okay. I’ll tell you my favorite one.” - Joe

He grinned, and not only did I know his devious smile was directed towards me, but I knew it meant he was up to something.

“One day, this boy, we’ll name him Joe, went to school.” - Joe

“That's your name!” - Miles

I immediately knew where this was headed, and I felt butterflies swarm my stomach.

“Yup. It was the first day of his senior year of high school. Not thinking much, he went to his first-period class. His teacher always made a boy and a girl sit together, and Joe thought he’d hate it, but it ended up being the best thing to ever happen to him.” - Joe

Both of the boys gasped, making Joe chuckle before he continued.

“Joe found his seat and saw that a girl he'd never seen before was sitting there. He thought she was beautiful, but Joe was focusing on football. Joe would soon find out that her name was y/n.” - Joe

“Like Mommy!” - Miles

“Yup, like Mommy. Joe and y/n talked the entire class, and they did that every day. They quickly realized that they had a lot in common and became best friends. Fast forward a bit, y/n wins homecoming queen, and Joe escorts her on the field. There, y/n called Joe her best friend… and told him that he was cute.” - Joe

There was another gasp from the twins, and I rolled my eyes with a smile on my face.

“Woah!” - Tyson

“I know, right? Not too long before that, Joe realized that he had a crush on her, but he just didn't know how to drop hints. After a little brainstorming, Joe asked y/n to the dance at school, but she already had a date.” - Joe

“Oh no!” - Tyson

“That's what Joe thought too, but the dance ended up being the best day of Joe’s life. The guy y/n went to the dance with ditched her, and Joe went alone. Y/n found Joe walking around in the hallways by himself, and she asked if he wanted to go see which teachers left their classroom doors open. Joe said yes, and y/n held his hand as they walked through the hallways. The chemistry door was open, which was the class they met in. They sat down at their table, and Joe realized it would be the perfect time to tell her how he felt. Joe told y/n he liked her, and y/n liked Joe too.” - Joe

Another gasp from Miles and Tyson, and I giggled at the look on their faces as Joe told the story of him and I getting together.

“Joe then asked y/n to be his girlfriend, and she said yes. Guess what happened next.” - Joe

“What?” - Miles

“They kissed.” - Joe

“Ew!!” - Miles

“Aww!” - Tyson

I laughed at their differing opinions, which were stated at the same time, and Joe did too, before giving me a wink.

“They live happily ever after?” - Tyson

“Yup. They got married and are still together to this day. They love each other very much. They're parents too, to twin boys.” - Joe

“Like me and Ty?” - Miles

“Mhm, and y/n is pregnant with a baby girl.” - Joe

“Like Mommy!” - Tyson

“Wait… is it about you and Mommy?” - Miles

Joe looked at me with a tiny smile on his face, the bling in his eyes making my heart flutter.

“Yes. That's how we met. The best day of my life.” - Joe grinned

——

“That was super sweet, Joey.” - you

“The story?” - Joe smiled

We had just walked into our bedroom from putting the twins to sleep, and my mind was stuck on Joe retelling the story of how we met.

“Yeah. I'm glad I got it right the first time.” - you

“Get what right?” - Joe

“Picking a boyfriend. We really said one and done.” - you laughed

“For real, but I’m glad too. Thank god for boy-girl seating chart teachers.” - Joe

Joe plopped onto the bed onto his stomach after pulling his shirt off, asking without words for me to lay down and scratch his back.

I walked over and leaned down, pressing a kiss between his shoulder blades before waking over to the bathroom.

In our usual routine, Joe and I would shower together. We took the time to share some non-sexual intimacy while spending our uncommon alone time exclusively together.

But today, Joe’s getting pranked.

Walking into the bathroom, I shut the door and locked it behind me.

I rushed to set my phone up to start videoing, then turned the shower on.

Almost instantaneously, Joe was knocking on the bathroom door.

Looking at the camera and laughing, I let him knock a couple of times before opening the door.

“Baby? Are you showering without me?” - Joe

He had his bottom lip stuck out in a pout, giving me his classic pleading angel eyes. Joe knew that combo got him anything.

“I just felt like having some alone time.” - you

Joe’s mouth fell open as he stared at me, honestly looking offended.

“What?” - Joe

“I wanted some alone time.” - you chuckle

“You seriously don't want me to shower with you?” - Joe

I stepped up on my tiptoes and pecked Joe’s lips, patting his chest when I pulled away.

“Maybe next time, babe.” - you

Making sure I was off-camera, I started undressing and the look on Joe’s face made me feel sad.

Once I was fully undressed, I hopped in the glass shower and shut the door behind me.

I looked over at Joe only to find him staring right at me with the same pout on his face.

“Aww, c’mere. I was just joking. You can shower with me, baby.” - you

“That's what I thought.” - Joe mumbled

When Joe undressed and hopped into the shower, I pulled him into my arms and pressed kisses all over his neck and face.

“You were videoing that entire thing weren't you?” - Joe

“Of course.” - you grinned

“You’re going to be the death of me.” - Joe

“Good way to go out though, right?” - you

“The best.” - Joe smiled

————————————————————————-

Authors note: Next fic at 9:25!!!

Requests for this fic;

[iris-in-the-rain]

Stede has had the most awful day at Bonnet Industries. He's feeling really poorly and run down, but he keeps trying to push through. His father already gave him a dressing down in front of everyone. He's been feeling so unwell that more than once, he had to sit down on the floor against the wall. Of course, nobody paid him any attention. His face is all red and puffy from trying to hold back tears, but all he gets from his 'colleagues' is snide comments about his appearance. He finally gets in the car and opens his phone to a message from his best friend, Ed

'Looking forward to the movie later! Can't believe we get to see it on the big screen 😍 Yaaaay! Do you remember the first time we saw it?? x'

Of course he remembers. How could he not? He remembers looking at Ed that day and thinking how lucky he was that such a cool, smart and talented person wanted to be friends with him, silly Stede Bonnet. Stede starts crying then, ugly sobs, because he completely forgot about tonight and Ed was so looking forward to seeing the first movie they both saw together on the big screen this evening and he's feeling so hot and weak, and look, Nigel is pointing at him from across the parking lot. So Stede starts driving until he somehow gets home. He barely remembers getting into the house and replying to Ed's message. Ed deserves better. Stede is just useless. He's not a good friend, let alone boyfriend material. He lies down on the sofa and closes his eyes.

Until he wakes up and isn't sure where he is or what's happening. He's simultaneously freezing and really hot. He's in his bed, wearing his fluffiest pajamas, and wrapped in a comforter. And Ed is sleeping in a chair next to him, holding his hand.

Stede whimpers, and Ed snaps awake, immediately cupping Stede's face and frowning at the heat radiating off him.

'Hey love, shhh, you're alright. You should have told me you were feeling so ill'

Stede's eyes fill with tears again.

'The movie! We missed the movie, Ed, I'm so sorry, 'm just useless...'

'Hey, who you calling useless, hey? Better not be my Stede. Gonna need you to take these and drink some water, okay?'

'Ed, I'm sorry fo...'

'Hey, it's okay...'

'No, it's not okay!' Two tears roll down Stede's fever-flushed cheeks. 'We were supposed to see our movie and I could finally tell you you're the best thing in my life and that, that I wouldn't know how to keep going without your support and and everything is wrong, but you are right, you are the only right in my life, and I love you, okay, I just love you so much, but I'm not good enough, and you d- deserve better and I'm just a st...'

But Stede doesn't finish as he finds himself wrapped in Ed's arms and oh, if that isn't the place he never ever wants to leave. Heaving sobs shake his body, as his best friend, his Ed, holds him close, pressing kisses to his head, and murmuring words that Stede can barely make out, but...

'Love, it's okay. I've got you. I love you, too. You have no idea how much, Stede, my god, I got so terrified when you wouldn't answer the door and then I saw you on the sofa...' Ed holds him tigther. 'You're everything, okay! Just...' Ed realises that with the fever, Stede might not remember any of this in the morning, but that's okay. He'll tell him again.

As Stede falls asleep again, it is to the sound of his best friend's heartbeat and a dream of love that he never dared to hope for but always deserved. And Ed falls asleep holding his whole world.

[incorrectbatfam]

Batfam’s Father’s Day plans

(also on Ao3)

"Morning, Bruce."

The way Stephanie says that instantly makes him look up. She traces her socked toe on the right angles of the tile, looking down. 

"Morning, Steph." Bruce puts his coffee down. "Something wrong?"

"Huh?" She perks up in realization. "No, not at all. I actually just have something for you. I stopped by Walgreens on patrol last night 'cause I ran out of antiseptic, and I saw something that reminded me of you." 

She hands him a dark blue greeting card with a cartoon fruit bat and Comic Sans text reading: You drive me batty, but I love you.

"Get it? 'Cause it's a bat, and you're the Batman." She scratches the back of her neck. "Not trying to make it weird or anything, you're just a cool mentor and whatnot. But also, it's nice to have someone who you can mess around with. My old man was always talking business even when he was at home—you kinda do that too, but in a good way 'cause anything's better than being a D-list villain, y'know. Plus, unlike him, you're working on striking a balance. Sometimes you even have a sense of humor." She chuckles awkwardly. "Anyway, I'm going on a jog. Text me if you need anything." 

Before he processes her rambling, she grabs a granola bar and races out the door. He opens the card and out falls out a handful of purple confetti plus an ever-rare two-dollar bill. Smiling, he brushes the confetti up and puts it in his shirt pocket. 

Bruce checks his watch. Everyone else is already out, except for Cass. She was out late last night on that Clayface mission, but even she should be up by this time. He fixes her a bowl of cereal with the package instructions and brings it upstairs. 

"Cass?" He knocks. "Are you up yet? It's past 9:30."

He hears the duvet crunch like a candy wrapper as she shuffles around. A moment later, the door swings open as a messy-haired Cass yawns. 

"I'll leave this up here for you," he says, putting the bowl on the dresser. "Any big plans today?"

She shakes her head. "Write reports. And relax."

"Well, you deserve a break. Great job on the stakeout, Princess." He plants a quick kiss on her forehead. 

"Love," she says.

"Huh?"

"Favorite thing you do. Love."

He laughs softly. "I try. Now go get dressed."

The rest of the day goes by like any other. Despite it being Sunday, he still has a meeting scheduled with some Singaporean investors on their timezone. By eleven, he and some other executives are gathered around the long conference table as the video call drones on, and it's not until over an hour later that they're finally let out. Bruce loosens his tie and Tim does the same, sighing in relief and exhaustion. 

Bruce asks, "Did you have lunch yet?"

"Oh, I forgot that's a thing," Tim says, stretching. "Hey, remember that ice cream place on 32nd?"

"You want ice cream for lunch?"

"I'd break your no killing rule for their M&M cookie sundae, okay?" he says. "Besides, remember when you took my friends and I there even though we massively bombed our first off-world fight? I might still be a massive perfectionist but that made me get a little more comfortable with failing. Anyway, I thought it'd be cool to stroll down memory lane—and have junk food as a meal without Alfred knowing. Unless you're busy, which I totally get."

"Not at all," Bruce replies, putting an arm around Tim's shoulders. "Duke and Damian will be at the arcade all day and I don't have any urgent side business." 

And so, instead of calling Alfred for a ride, they journey through the Gotham subways with Tim's camera capturing the Grammy-worthy saga of a billionaire CEO battling a common turnstyle. They get a few side-glances in the sparse train car, but besides a teenager asking for Tim's autograph, the civilians leave them alone. Pretty soon, they're at a 1950s-themed ice cream parlor, where the waitress slides their orders down the long chromium bar. 

"Why do they call it a banana split?" Bruce asks, grabbing the cocoa powder shaker. 

Tim pauses mid-bite of his cookie. "...Because they split the banana in half?"

"Really?"

He moves the whipped cream aside to reveal the cut banana in Bruce's dish. 

"How would it sound if I said I never noticed that?"

He smirks. "That's why I'm the brains of this operation."

"Indeed you are." Bruce ruffles his hair. "Though this head of yours could use some shampoo." 

"Will saying I love you get me a free pass out of it?"

"No." He laughs. "But I love you too, son."

Alfred catches on to their little dessert escapade and picks them up from the parlor, though not without commenting on the strawberry stain on Bruce's jacket. As Tim plugs his music into the car, Bruce takes the time to listen to the voicemails he got during their lunch break. 

"Hiya Bruce," Clark's voice plays. "I hope today's going swell for you. I just want you to know that I'm glad I can call you my pard'ner." Bruce snickers at the country twang.

Next is Diana. "Bruce, I apologize if I must keep this brief since I have a curator's convention today. However, I wish to tell you that you are an invaluable teammate and even more remarkable friend."

"Hey Batman, I gave you a shoutout to the Central City press for your help taking down Weather Wizard," Barry says. "Also, thanks for letting me borrow your communicator. I can always count on you to be overprepared. Have a good one!"

"Bats, tell your kid to quit taking my yogurt from the fridge." Ah, good old Hal. "Also, today's all about guys like you, so... yeah. I admit, you could be worse." 

Finally, there's one from Zatanna. "Afternoon, Bruce! I'd tell you in person if I wasn't caught up in Kahndaq, but I hope today is extra special for you. I know how much the birds mean to you, and I know they're gonna treat you well."

(There's also one from Ollie, but he's just asking if he can use the communicator after Barry. In the background, Dinah is is clearly ordering food.) 

After dropping Tim and Alfred home and switching to a more discreet vehicle, Bruce makes his way to pick two of his other kids up from the arcade. 

"Did you guys have fun?" Bruce asks as they climb in.

"We decimated every game," Damian says, "and won you the finest specimen as a trophy."

He plops a five-foot Snorlax into the front seat and buckles the seatbelt.

"This is for me?" Bruce asks. 

"Tt, who else would it be for?"

"I didn't win as many tickets," Duke says, "but I also got you a spider ring and a Chinese finger trap." He puts them in the cupholder.

"Why are you giving me all your prizes?"

"Again, who else would we give them to?" Damian asks.

Duke says, "I think what he means is that you do a lot for us, so this is a thanks from us."

As silly as it might seem, Bruce is genuinely touched. 

Pre-patrol dinner is a quiet affair, with Kate stopping by because she apparently forgot to go grocery shopping. She takes a fingerling potato off his plate. 

"Um, you're welcome?" he says. 

"Bruce, we're family. It's what we do." She takes a bite. 

He takes a piece of asparagus from her. "I wish all of us were here, though. Too bad Dick and Jason have that Penguin stakeout. Hopefully they're being safe."

"Even if things go wrong, they were taught by the best. You should trust them more." Selina gets up and places a peck on his cheek before going to get a drink. 

"I do," he mumbles into his meal. "It's the world I don't trust." 

As he puts on his cowl, he asks Barbara for an update on the evening. So far, Duke is handling a carjacking, the girls are preoccupied with a strip mall hostage situation, Damian is patrolling Metropolis with Jon, and Kate is kicking off her shift with a car chase against Two-Face. Tim and Selina are staying back to catch up on some overdue reports, but other than that, the cave is quiet. 

"Before you go," Barbara says, "my dad was cleaning out the attic and found something you might like."

From her bag, she pulls out a blue mug that says: World's Okayest Dad.

"My brother got it for him a long time ago, but... you know. It's all yours now, if you want it." 

He takes it, running his thumb along the words. 

"It suits you," she says before turning back to relay something to Stephanie. 

The route laid out for him tonight gives him the perfect opportunity to swing by and check on two of his boys. He lands on the rooftop silently, where Nightwing and Red Hood have already set up camp. Evidently, they don't notice him as they keep going with their conversation.

"Did you get dropped on your head as a baby?" Jason asks. "Sour cream and Greek yogurt are not the same thing."

"They totally are, change my mind." Dick glances through his binoculars. "No sign of Cobblepot yet."

A moment goes by as Jason not-so-covertly steals some of his brother's patrol snacks. 

"So how'd family therapy go yesterday?" Jason asks. "Did the old bat finally show an emotion?"

"It was pretty insightful, at least on my part." Dick lowers his binoculars. "I think I realized where Bruce's persistence comes from. It's annoying as hell, but I think that's how he maintains hope. And who knows, maybe it's his love language."

Jason scoffs. 

"I'm serious," he says. "I know none of us are stellar at this family thing, but we care about each other. You can't deny that. We just gotta... refine how we express it." 

"Count me out."

"Jaybird."

"Codenames, Dickhead."

Dick snickers. "You love us, admit it. All of us."

Jason mutters a string of curses under his breath before saying, "If you tell him, I'm filling your mattress with sour cream."

Bruce smiles and leaps to the next building. 

At the end of the night, Bruce finds Alfred brewing tea in the kitchen and takes the kettle from him. 

"I got this," he says. "Why don't you go relax in the living room? I think they added your favorite detective movie to Netflix." 

"This is a pleasant surprise." Alfred raises an eyebrow. "What brought it on?"

"It's Father's Day, of course," he replies, pouring the cups of tea. "You know you've always been a second dad to me."

"You made that clear with last year's breakfast surprise," Alfred says. "Care to join me?"

"Always," Bruce says. "By the way, do the kids seem different to you today?"

[salford-blues]

Dressed to impress

A/n: I am so not ready to go back to Uni. So fics might slow down a bit because this semester might take a toll on me haha.

Pairing: F1 grid x driver!reader Summary: Y/N shows off her little family to the world, in which they're all dressed to impress. Well most of them are <33 Warnings: like a swear word

@yourusername and @l/nandcompany

liamlawson30, georgerussell63, landonorris & others liked

My new account for my little companions! Just a fun little account for my many pets.

Left - Thackery (12), Middle - Cosmic Creepers (8), Right - Oogie Boogie (8)

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alex_albon booooooo!! Just trying to copy now 👎

> yourusername i cant just let their cuteness go to waste

>> alex_albon you know what... fairs. Cossie is very cute

User.1 eeeeeee soso cute

User.2 Thackery doesn't look very happy

> yourusername that because Alex didn't bring is favourite treat...

>> alex_albon heeyy i forgot!! Tell him I'm sorry. pleassee

>>> yourusername he said he'll forgive if you bring him some next time!

>>>> alex_albon deal!!

landonorris do NOT let Cosmic Creepers fool you. He may be cute, but he's possessed. I'm telling you

> oscarpiastri dramatic, and for what?

@l/nandcompany and @yourusername

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Omg, I've never looked so good...

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User.3 how do you come up with these names???

> yourusername most of them are named after characters!!!

charles_leclerc hahaha... veryyy funny caption

> yourusername knew you'd like it

User.4 how many pets do you have?

> yourusername faaarr too many.

User.5 surely this is animal abuse...

User.6 Why does she have a hedgehog?? I thought they were illegal in some states

> yourusername 1. I rescued him and 2. not everyone lives in the states babes <33 but thanks for the concern

@l/nandcompany and @yourusername

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Having a fursome time. Managed to snag a pic before Diablo fought the camera. 🐾

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User.6 Diablo looks very cool.

> yourusername Diablo likes to tell people to 'fuck off'... wonder were he got that from

>> yourusername looking at you @liamlawson30 👀👀

>>> liamlawson30 don't know what you're on about 😤

>>>> yourusername sure you don't. Just like you don't remember teaching him to attack people when they're smacking their lips.

>>>>> User.12 that is a very valid reason to attack someone

logansargeant look how sophisticated Meeko looks

> yourusername oh wow, that's a big word coming from you

>> logansargeant i try to be nice and this is what i get in return...

>>> oscarpiastri yh but you're american. it's why you get bullied

roscoelovescoco whens cans I's comes round agains?

> yourusername soon Roscoe!! Prometheus and Itchy miss you

@l/nandcompany and @yourusername

frederikvestioffical, georgerussell63, danielricciardo & others liked

We wish you a merry christmas and aaaaa happpyyyy newwwww yeaaarrrr 🎄🎄🎄

Left - Ankyl (6), Middle - Bandersnatch (2), Right - Scorchito (2)

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User.7 why are all these animals so cuuutteeee

User.8 cuteness overload... think I'm gonna die

User.9 Ankyl isn't very christmassy

> yourusername I couldn't find his christmas picture, so I had to put his halloween one up instead

porschef1 hmmm meet and greet when??

*yourusername liked comment*

User.10 do any of them have a favourite person/driver? do any of the hate one of the drivers?

> yourusername yes and yes!! some examples: all of the cats HATE Lando, but Itchy loves him. The cats like Oscar, Alex, Liam, George etc. The ferrets are fond of Fred Vesti and Charles. The bird likes noone... he will attack at any point. ESPECIALLY when you're singing. He's a very naughty boy and we can blame Liam for that.

>> User.11 Liam and Lando catching strays left, right and centre.

maxfewtrell Lando looks like he might cry. Keep talking

> yourusername well I'll send Itchy his way. That'll cheer him up

>> landonorris thanks gonna keep him now

>>> yourusername right... grounded for 3 months.

>>>> landonorris 3 MONTHS???? WHY???

>>>>> yourusername cause the cats told me to

>>>>>> landonorris this is bullying!!

@yourusername and @l/nandcompany

mickschumacher, liamlawson30, oscarpiastri & others liked

Meet our newest member Koda 🐻

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User.13 awweee he's so fluffy!!

oscarpiastri I want to be the first one to meet him

> mickschumacher too late...

>> oscarpiastri I SAW THAT

>>> oscarpiastri NNOOOOOO

User.14 wait Mick was the first to meet him? Awweee

> logansargeant NO not 'awweee'. Why was Mick the first one Birdie?? Why not me? Why not Oscar? Do you not love us?

>> yourusername why so dramatic? Can we appreciate Koda's cuteness instead ta

mickschumacher so cute!! Can't wait to meet him 💙💛

> logansargeant you can't sweet talk your way out of this Mick

>> oscarpiastri LIAARRR... count your days Mick

>>> yourusername stop threatening the poor boy or else you can join Lando

>>>> oscarpiastri no please I'll be nice. Promise 🙏

[cjlouwho]

prompt: buck discovers that tommy is a fantastic baker. its a very casual reveal at first, like tommy makes a loaf of bread for the soup buck makes. as time goes on, tommy starts making more elaborate things - chocolate croissants for a brunch, fruit tarts for a picnic date, a single tier cake with elaborate icing detail on their first anniversary.

This went in a different direction, but I got the baking part! Hope you like it!

“Damn it! Ugh! Damn it!”

Tommy peeked out the bathroom door to where Buck was getting dressed in their bedroom. “What's wrong?”

Buck tossed his phone onto the bed. “I forgot I was supposed to bake stuff for Chris' class. I wasn't working when I told Chris I'd do it, then Mark asked if I could take his shift and I- I forgot.”

“When's he need the stuff?”

“I'm supposed to drop it off at Eddie's tonight so Chris can take it with him in the morning.”

Tommy turned off the bathroom light and walked over to the bed, sitting on the edge. He watched Buck very closely as he put his shirt on. “I can do it.”

Buck froze briefly, his shirt crumpled up at his neck. “I, um, no, it's- it's okay. I'll just order something to be delivered.”

“I'm serious, Evan, I'll do it. I know how to bake stuff.”

Buck sighed, pulled his shirt the rest of the way down. “Christopher is really picky about what he takes in, Tommy, if it's not just right he'll blame me for it for the rest of his life.”

Tommy got up and walked over to Buck, placing a hand on either side of his face. “Ev, I've got this, I promise. I'll take it to Chris tonight, and tell him he can toss me off the edge of a cliff if the desserts are not well received.”

Tommy gave him a kiss to wipe away the apprehensive look on his face.

“Fine,” Buck agreed. “But you better watch yourself if you tell him the cliff thing. He's very strong.”

*****

“What the hell did you do?” Buck called out as soon as he walked in the door the next day.

“Hello to you too, honey,” Tommy answered cheekily, waiting on the couch for Buck to come in the room. “So good to see you after a whole day apart. Oh, a kiss? For me? You shouldn't have!”

Buck entered the room, hands on his hips, and from the look on his face he was not amused. “Care to tell me why I got a text from Christopher this afternoon saying that he no longer needed me to make my famous double chocolate chip cookies for the charity bake next month because, and I quote, 'I want Tommy to make his chocolate croissants and fruit tarts instead.'”

“Seems pretty self explanatory, hun.” And, okay, maybe Tommy was being a little bit of a dick, but he loved when he got Buck all riled up. It was pretty hot.

“You know I know how to use a rotary saw, don't you?” Buck asked pointedly.

Tommy cocked his head to the side. “Yeah, I do too. Evan, are you threatening to chop me up over baked goods?”

Buck kept his glare for a moment before dropping the charade. His shoulders slumped as he plopped down across from Tommy on the couch. “No,” he replied, “but... but you made croissants? And tarts?”

Tommy shrugged. “I am a man of many talents, Evan, and you have yet to scrape the surface.”

“We've been together for nearly a year, there's not a surface on you I haven't scraped... except this, apparently.”

Tommy smiled. He reached for Buck's hand, bringing it to his lips for a little kiss. Buck rolled his eyes, but melted into the touch. “I saved you one of each,” Tommy said, giving Buck that sheepish grin he loved so much.

“Alright,” Buck got up from the couch and headed into the kitchen, “let me go try these life changing baked goods that got me fired.”

Tommy listened to the rustling in the kitchen. He gave it a few seconds, then got up and quietly snuck into the room, watching as Buck took a bite of the croissant.

He closed his eyes, obviously relishing the taste. As Buck went for seconds, Tommy cleared his throat, causing Buck to jump. “Jesus!” he yelped, mouth full.

“Sorry,” Tommy replied with a laugh. “How's it taste?”

Buck tried to play it cool. “S'good... I guess.”

“Really?” Tommy questioned, eyebrow raised. "Just good?"

Buck groaned. “Okay, fine! It's delicious! I had no idea you knew how to bake like this, Tommy. When'd you learn?”

“Lots of stuff going on in my head when I got discharged from the army,” Tommy replied, keeping the topic light. Buck already knew everything about that anyway. No reason to dwell. “I started baking then, because when you're baking you have to focus on the ingredients and what you're doing. Did it more when I started working for Gerrard. Not so much after I started therapy, although I do still enjoy it.”

“Well, you're amazing at it. I can see why I my cookies have been thrown into a bottomless pit to never return.”

Tommy moved closer to Buck, wrapping his arms around the man's waist. He pressed a kiss to his mouth, tasting the residual chocolate that lingered. “Why don't we both bake for the charity thing?” Tommy offered.

“And compete with you?” Buck scoffed. “Hell no. But do me a favor and make me more than one next time. And don't eat the tart, I haven't tried that yet. Also, we're having a celebration at the station next week for Jenny. She's coming back from maternity leave. Do you make cakes? Could you make it look like an open stomach in the middle of a c-section? Oh, Jee will definitely want cupcakes for-”

As Buck rambled out a long list of occasions that required baked goods, Tommy couldn't help but wonder if this was the plan all along.

[daydreamingmia]

First Day on Set🌊🔱

Walker Scobell X Reader | Series | You Belong With Me🔱 Part 1

A/n: Sorry, I didn't re-read the story, so there might be spelling errors.

Y/n's bio: The reader is just a few weeks younger than Walker. She got her start on Good Luck Charlie as Charlie. But Taylor Swift discovered her musically. She has released three record-breaking albums so far. Once Taylor took her under her wing, things were never the same. Not that you didn't like it. You loved it!! But sometimes the paparazzi can be annoying. Especially when your best friends are huge stars.

When she gets the part of Annabeth in Percy Jackson, she becomes best friends with the cast. Especially her co-star, Walker Scobell. But will they become more than just friends?

The alarm clock goes off and you look over to see it is 7 am.

You groan as you turn it off

"Come on y/n! We are going to be late!"

You hop out of bed as your remembered what day it was. Today was the first day of filming Percy Jackson! You have loved Percy Jackson since you were very little and you were so excited to play Annabeth! You hop out of bed and rush to get dressed.

This is just the first thing I found on pinterest

(You can change it if you'd like)

By the time you are ready it is 7:35. You run out to the car and jumped in. Then you saw a text from the group. You have gotten very close to all of them in the last few months. Especially Walker.

Camp Halfblood GC

Walker🔱: Y/n! You were supposed

to be here 20 minutes ago! Are

you still asleep?🙄🙄🙄

Aryan🐐: Oh no! The monsters got y/n!!😱😱

Y/n: I just fought one off!! I'm on my way now!!

Y/n: I just fought one off!! I'm on my way now!!

Walker🔱: On second thought

maybe don't come here. 😬

Y/n: She says she'll let me live

if I tell her where Walker is hiding.

Walker🔱: What?!

Y/n: I'm on my way!! She let me go😁

Walker🔱: Oh no! You are the one

who is gonna betray me 😱😱

Y/n:🤣🤣🤣

Y/n: I'm pulling in now.

Walker🔱: Cool. You want some Chick fil a? I'm ordering delivery.

Y/n: YES PLEASE!!!😁

××FLASHBACK××

You and the cast of Percy Jackson were going to a Party to meet one another.

You get out of the car and are half way there when you realize you forgot your phone.

"Ugh! Mom I forgot my phone ill run back and meet you there."

She nidded

You were running back when you ran into someone.

"Hey!" He said jokingly as you both fell to the ground.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't look where I was going!" You apologized

"Don't worry about it!" He said with a chuckle as he stood up and offered you his hand. You took it and he pulled you up

"Hey aren't you that girl from Avengers?" He asked

"Please to make your acquaintance." You said in a funny voice bowing

You both laugehd

"Y/c/n is such a badass!"

You talked for a little but then parted way so you could get your phone.

××END FLASHBACK××

When you got to set you parking in your marked spot and went to your trailer to meet your hair and makeup artists(Gina and Natalie). They were very nice and sat you down as you got to know each other.

Walker walked in with Chick Fil A and sat next to you.

"I got you a cookies and cream milkshake too" He said sitting down I the seat next to you.

"Thank you!! Your makeup is done already?" You asked while grabbing the milkshake he was taking a sip out of.

"IT WAS DONE AN HOUR AGO! YOU WERE LATE!" He screamed and you both laughed.

You take a picture of him and the food and post it.

The first scene you did was the bathroom scene.

You were talking with Dior when the director yelled action. You got yourself into character.

"I can explain" Walker said nervously

"No you can't" I replied

"Okay. Wait...I know you dont I?"

"No you don't" I replied channeling my inner Annabeth

"You were there that night in the infirmary"

"Yes. I'm Annabeth"

"Are you stalking me Annabeth?"

"Yes" I say like it's totally normal

"Okay" He said caught off guard

"Well, I've been waiting to see if something like this would happen so I know if you can help me"

"Help you do what?"

"Win capture the flag of course"

The director yelled cut and Walker walked up to you dripping wet

"Hey great job! You were born to play Annabeth!" He said as you backed away from him

"What's wrong?" He asked a little confused

"I don't want to get wet" you said continuing to set back

"Well in that case..." He said with a mischievous grin in his face

He then lunged forward and had you in and bear hug and was spining you.

The hug you didn't mind but now you were covered in water too.

"WALKER! PUT ME DOWN!" You demand

"Fine" He said putting you down

"That's what you get for eating my nuggets" He said with a fake stern face

"I hate you! You said looking at how soaked you were.

"You love me" He said with a smile

"I do" you sighed

A/N: This is my first attempt at fanfiction!! I hope you like it!

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

Could we get a Frankie Morales fluff or smut (whichever you're feeling, or both?) with

35. "Better than I ever imagined."

👀👀🥺🥺💚

Find You.

35. "Better than I ever imagined."

Author's Note - this is a drabble written as part of my 500 Followers Celebration!! find that post here if you're interested in sending a request!! i love writing for any pedro characters. those big brown eyes get me everytime :(

Pairing - Frankie Morales x Neighbour!Female Reader

Warnings - mild cursing. smooching <3

Word Count - 811

Masterlist. 500 Follower Celebration Masterlist.

Your episode of TV is interrupted by a knock at your front door.

"Sweetheart? It's me. It's Frankie."

Sighing with relief, you make your way to the door, opening it to be met with none other than your next door neighbour, Frankie Morales.

"Hey!" you greet, probably a little too chirpy. Your crush on this man is monumental, and you often find you have to remind yourself to play it cool around him.

"Hey, I'm not interrupting anything, am I?"

"Ever the gentleman. No, you're not. Just watching TV. What do you need?"

It's not uncommon for you and Frankie to show up at each others doors unannounced. Sometimes, he'll come to borrow sugar, or you'll pop over to ask for help fixing your faucet. You make good neighbours, always helping one another out in whatever way you can.

"I have a weird request," he explains, stepping inside and shutting the door behind him.

"Hit me with it, Morales."

"Can I use your shower?"

Oh. Suddenly, your mind is flooded with images of Frankie, dripping wet, towel hanging low on his hips, hair messy...

"You with me, honey?" he asks, slight smirk on his lips.

"Yeah, sorry. Daydreaming," you recover. "Any reason you can't use your own?"

"Something's wrong with it. I've tried to fix it, but I think I made it worse. I've been at work all day, and the plumber can't come until tomorrow," he explains.

"Well, you know where the bathroom is. I'll get you a clean towel," you begin to walk towards your cupboard when a strong arm grabs your wrist and pulls you back.

"Thank you, so much. You're an angel, you know that right?" he winks at you, and you throw your head back in a laugh. The melody of it makes him smile.

He makes his way to your bathroom, you following shortly after with his towel. You retreat back to the living room, resuming your episode and trying not to think about the currently naked Frankie Morales in your apartment.

"Sweetheart?" he speaks from the doorway, startling you.

"Shit, Frankie! You move like a Prius!"

"Sorry," he laughs, clearly amused.

You look at him carefully. He's still dry.

"I'm totally interrupting something, aren't I?" he asks.

You raise your eyebrows in confusion. He continues.

"There's a pretty dress hanging up in the bathroom, and your makeup is all over the counter. Were you going out? Am I totally ruining your plans right now?"

Shit. You'd forgotten you'd hung your dress up to try and get the creases out, and totally forgot to put all your makeup away. You'd scrubbed your face with a makeup wipe haphazardly and made yourself cosy on the couch, paying no mind to the mess you'd left behind.

"No, no," you explain. "I was supposed to be going out, but the plans changed."

You're hoping he doesn't notice the slight wobble in your voice. He does.

"Hey, hey, are you okay?" he frets, coming to sit next to you. "Did something happen? You can talk to me."

"It's nothing. Seriously. It's stupid."

"It's not stupid if it's upset you."

He's looking at you so intently with those warm chocolate eyes, you're struggling not to burst into tears.

"I was meant to be going on a date. I was kind of excited, actually. But he cancelled last minute with some bullshit excuse."

"Oh, honey."

"It seems to happen to me a lot. Do I repel love, or something? Why can everyone find it but me?"

Frankie grabs your hands in his, warm palms calming you down.

"You're too good for men like that," he says firmly. "They don't deserve you."

You smile half-heartedly at him, and sit in the silence for a while, fingers still intertwined. Frankie's voice breaks through the quiet gently.

"Maybe you need to stop looking for love. Maybe it'll find you." Then, a bit quieter, "Maybe it already has."

Your eyes widen at his confession, searching his face for any traces of humour. Instead, you're met with Frankie looking at you carefully, no hints of amusement on his features. He's deadly serious.

"I'm so glad that idiot cancelled on you," he admits. "Because it means I get to do this."

He surges forward and captures your lips in a searing kiss. His hands move to cradle your face, and yours move to tangle in his chocolate curls.

The kiss is electric, alive with excitement. It's passionate and loving and heated and well worth the wait.

You pull away, gasping for air. He rests his forehead on yours, breathing each other in.

"Better than I ever imagined," he whispers against your lips.

"Yeah?" you smile.

"Yeah," he confirms, grinning from ear to ear.

Suddenly, Frankie stands up from the couch, pulling you by the hand. He's smirking, mischief rife in his eyes.

"Now, how about that shower?"

[anonymouscheeses]

Exorcist gang! (I'm so sorry it took forever to get to your ask. I kind of dropped the au for a long time and just now got the motivation to pick it up again.)

Right on the money! I just narrowed it down to three because I can't do anymore(lazy ahh). But they can't actually drive motorcycles because none of them have a drivers license so they just try to seem badass by saying they are a biker gang. All christian but they have no idea how it works and do things looked down upon by the christian community. Left Victoria. Middle Stephanie. Right Kamaria. Kamaria got a tattoo of the upside down cross to seem cool but she knows it's St. Peter's cross so it's kind of a double meaning for her. I also gave Kamaria three toned lips because I jst found out that exists and I had to include that in some character. Atleast one.

Maybe one day I'll draw them as angels just to do it.

For context, they are exes 😫

Are there still feelings? Kind of, they just aren't over eachother yet. Right now tho they are mainly enemies. Valerie(Vaggie) is kind of like Blitzø(relationships wise), but less of an asshole. It was mostly her fault they broke up though. She was uninterested and embarrassed by Kamaria almost all the time so ofc Kamaria doesn't stand for shit and ended it before it got worse. Valerie is like that with Charlie in some ways, but of course that's for growth purposes.

Oh also Valerie dated Lute too before she dated Kamaria so it's just this entire problem within the group bro.. Like, Lute is not over Valerie and not in a "I am in love with u still." Way, but in a "I hate the way you walk, the way you talk, I hate the way dress-" ahh way(and in an i am still in luv wit u way but shh). Lute has no idea why Valerie broke up wit her ass and takes it out on Kamaria. Kama takes no shit and bounced out that place quickly. Good for her ig. She still an asshole too, anger issues ahh, everyone except Charlie(until the vee accident 😏)deserves a kick in the ass.

Pretend Charlie is in her human form. I'm still workshopping it right now! 😔 so yeah nobody else except Valerie knows she's a demon jst so you know!

Chaggie aren't dating yet! But they will one day 😈

For now it's kind of just pining. On both sides ofc.

"So it mine el" we say in unison.

PLEASE TELL ME SOMEONE GETS THE REFERENCE?? THIS IS SO AWKWARD NOW...

Helmets and glasses off! I think they look pretty nice but im not great at making my own character designs from ground up. Which is why I havent shown my actual own OC's. Victoria is trans because I said so. Kamaria is probably Lesbian but she doesn't know yet, it's kind of a label she uses until she knows for sure (so me). And Stephanie is Stephanie (she don care. She don kno 💀). I FORGOT THE FLAME ON KAMARIA'S JACKET RAAAA.

They also all have a picture on the back of their jackets that's jst wings and a halo. So do with that what you will.... if u wanna make fanart that is..... pls..... I'm begging..... jk but it would still be cool lmao.

They used to be in a gang with Adam and Lute but after Valerie was beat up real bad by Lute they all decided to just part ways. Not on good terms... So it's just Adam and Lute now who jst act like they are all that when they cant pack a punch at all 😒. I'll show Adam and Lute's designs in the next update (or somewhere) but that's all I have right now. I can't wait to draw the duo ughhhh‼️‼️‼️

(I have also changed a few things from my original idea, so if your a hxd au og from the first like... 3 posts I made abt it then ya... there's major changes. I'll go through them deeper in my next updates on this au!)

[lover-also-fighter-also]

THE PRINCE SWAP

Hi everyone,

So me and @cadybear420 had this idea of writing an adaptation of The Princess Swap, but featuring our OG: HSS MC's, Jeremy Rin (my MC) and Alan Parke (Cady's MC). Hope you enjoy it. And please tell us in the comments/reblogs about how it is.

Tagging @choicesficwriterscreations for this work.

Additional tags: @somerandomjewelleryonthefloor @choicesmc

@choicescommunityevents

@choicesmonthlychallenge

Chapter 1 part 1: Worlds Collide

It was a gorgeous day in the kingdom of Monterre, and Jeremy Rin, new exchange student of Julivert University and member of the Delta Theta Delta sorority was in his room, putting final touches to his presentation.

'That's done! Now time for a break.' he said, stretching himself out, and hopping off the bed. Just then, the bedroom door opens, and Jeremy's best friend, and the first person he met in this country, Faye, enters.

'You done?' she asks, taking his laptop. 'Yep.' said Jeremy, 'Think that's good for a perfect grade?' Faye frowns as she skims through the presentation. 'Not bad, but you are certainly not going to get a perfect grade for this.' she said. 'That's okay.' said Jeremy, 'A decent grade is enough for me.'

'Come on, Jer. Don't you want to put a little more effort into this?' asked Faye. 'Nah, I'm good. Besides, I was hoping we hit the pub tonight. Come on Faye, live a little.' said Jeremy, grinning and giving a light punch on her shoulder. 'Besides, I think I would want to find more adventure than homework, now that I'm in another country.' Despite herself, Faye smiles a little. 'Okay Jer, you win. You always manage to smooth talk your way out of things. Wish I knew how you do that.' Jeremy grins. 'It's my secret talent. I can't share all my secrets, not even to my best friend.' as Faye gave him a look.

Meanwhile, at the Monterre Palace…

Prince Alan of Monterre stood in front of his mirror, while his closest friend and lady-in-waiting, Aveline fits him into his new pink and floral dress. 'Don't you think it's a little too loose, Ave?' said Alan, adjusting himself to the new dress.

'Not if you want to enjoy your afternoon tea, your highness.' said Aveline, rushing around and taking final adjustments. 'Relax Ave, its not the end of the world - oof', he stopped as Aveline made an adjustment tighter. 'But its my job to make things perfect for you, your highness.' she said, taking short breaths.

'Ave, look at me.' said Alan, grabbing her arms. 'You are doing just fine. Besides, I would hate to see that beautiful face of yours get wrinkled because of the constant frowning.' he said, giving a small wink. Aveline laughed. 'You flatter me, your highness. Oh, I almost forgot, your father sent this.' She pulled out a letter with the royal seal. Alan frowns.

'Why does he always have to be this formal? He is my dad for god's sake.' He said, as he broke the seal and read the letter out loud. 'My dearest son, I have cancelled your afternoon schedule, to make time for a more relaxing itinerary (attached below). You also need not worry about the royal council meeting either. I will see you for dinner tonight. Love, Father.'

Alan skims through the itinerary, his frown deepening 'Lunch, socialization, walk through the garden…What does he think I am? A kid? He can't control my life!' Aveline rubs his shoulder, comfortingly 'He has certainly got a lot more protective since your mother passed.'

'You know what, I can't deal with this right now. I am heading to the conservatory to clear my head.' He leaves his room, followed by Aveline.

At the Delta Theta Delta Sorority…

'It's a beautiful day.' says Jeremy, looking out of the building. 'If only there was a place that I can go that can help me relax for a while..'. 'I would say try the conservatory.' said Faye, looking up from her work. They say it has very unique varieties of plants and its a really cool place..'

'Yeah, I know all about it.' said Jeremy, pulling a picture out of his wallet, showing a beautiful young woman sitting at the fountain. She had Jeremy's eyes and the same smile. 'That's where my mom and dad met, and mom might have told me the story a million times.'

'Your mom was a Monterrian? You never told me Jer.' said Faye, looking at the photo. 'Nah, she is American, she was just visiting here when she met my dad.'

'Wow, that's cute.' said Faye. 'So that's where you disappear off to for hours'. she said looking up at him. Jeremy shrugged. 'Guilty as charged. Sort of feels like home that place, you know.' he said, looking pensive. Faye touched his shoulder, 'Jeremy…' she said, which made Jeremy snap out of his daze. 'Hey, don't go all sentimental on me, I'm fine!' he said, putting back his usual grin.

'I'm heading over there and will be right back before we hit the pub.' he said. Before Faye could say anything, he rushed out of the sorority building, taking a walk to the city's royal conservatory. He passed by the rows of familiar flowers and plants, musing in his thoughts. He turns to the corner, and bumps into a stranger. 'Woah watch it…' starts Jeremy, but stops mid-speech when he sees the stranger.

'Who are you?' says Jeremy. 'And why do we look alike?' say the two of them at the same time.

Just then, a young woman rushes to the corner, and stops to look at the two of them.

'Um…Prince Alan, why are there two of you?'

[rekino2114]

Shinigami discovering Halloween

Halloween post #4

Pairing:shinigami x male reader

Summary:Despite your girlfriend being kind of a ghost, she's not familiar with Halloween, but when she heard it was a holiday dedicated to death and fear, she couldn't have been happier to celebrate

A/n:Shinigami is just ghost junko change my mind......I love her so much. I forgot if it's been confirmed if vivia can see Shinigami, but I'm pretty sure it's been heavily implied, and it would be weird if he couldn't with his forte also I really like him and wanted to write something with him in it. Shinigami is always in her human form in this.

Everything was quiet at the nocturnal detective agency. You were reading a book vivia recommended you while relaxing on the couch. The only sound that could be heard was the rain pouring outside. Everything was relaxing and quiet

"Masteeeeeer! Come on master I'm sooo bored let's do something"

Except for the death god standing behind you, that is

"*sighs* I am doing something, shinigami, I'm reading"

"Yeah, but I'M not doing anything. Is your book more important than your super hot and cute and awesome gf?"

"I swear you're so needy"

"I can't help it. I love you so much master"

You blushed and sighed again

"Fine, just let me finish this chapter, and I'm all yours"

"Wait, what am I supposed to do in the meantime?"

"I dunno just look out the window or something. It's won't be long"

"Alriiiiight, it's still boring though, with the rain you can't see anything"

"I think it makes it more scenic, but think what you want"

Shinigami floated over to the window near the couch and noticed something unusual outside

"Hey, what's with all the dressed up kids?"

"Oh, it's Halloween, so they're probably just trick-or-treating"

"Hm? Halloween, what's that?"

"You don't know? I thought you of all..... beings would know"

"Master, with all due respect, I really don't care about human festivities, oh except for funerals, those are always so fun"

"....anyway, Halloween is like.....Uhm how do I explain it?"

"Halloween is the night the spirits of the dead come the closest to the human world"

You two turned towards the voice and saw vivia lying under the couch while reading

"Aaahhhh, it's the anemic vampire!"

"Hi vivia, what were you doing there?"

"Reading, like you"

"That's not what I......nevermind, is what you said true?"

"Yes, in fact, there are a lot more spirits than usual today, and the number will only grow during the night"

"Oh, so that's why you didn't leave like the others? Cause you didn't want to see all the spirits?"

"Indeed, though, there are a lot of them here too....it's annoying.....*sighs* I wanna die"

"I guess I noticed that too, I didn't think too much about it, though,"

"That's cool to know, I guess people have a good reason to celebrate then"

"I still don't get it. What's that got to do with all the kids in costumes?"

"Children go around in costumes asking for candies this holiday"

"......why?"

"Uhm?"

"If Halloween is like ghost day, why do kids ask for candies? That has nothing to do with it"

"...I guess the costumes can be kinda scary sometimes, I get your point though"

"That's soooo unfair. This holiday is supposed to be about ghosts and fear and, most importantly, death. It's supposed to be super scary, and those kids are ruining it"

"....I really don't think it's their fault, this has been a tradition for basically forever"

"Well, we need to change it, master let's go!"

Shinigami started flying away from where you were faster, making the chain on your neck appear and drag you near her

"S-shini, stop! You're hurting me"

"Oh eheh sorry master"

"Where are we going anyway?"

"Outside, we need to scare everyone we see and bring the true spirit of Halloween!"

"No"

"What! Whyyyyyy?"

"Cause we can't, how would we do it anyway?"

"I'm a death god, I'll definitely spook all of them in no time"

"1:Only me and vivia can see you, so that wouldn't work, and 2:you just look like a very beautiful woman, that won't scare anyone"

"So you finally recognized my beauty"

"I tell you that basically every day shini, but anyway yeah, we won't go"

"*sighs* I guess you're right master, that's such a shame, though"

You looked at Shinigami's sad and pouting face and felt bad for her

"But I guess we could do some other Halloween things"

"Hm, like what?"

"We can bake some autumn sweets for us, or I guess me since you can't eat, we can also watch horror movies"

"Oh oh, yeah, horror movies, let's watch one, with a lot of murders please"

"Alright, I'll put on a slasher....and we can cuddle meanwhile"

"Yaaaay ok now I'm sooo happy master, thanks I love you so much master"

"I love you too"

The death god flied over to you and kissed your cheek before moving to the couch and floating on it, making herself comfortable and waiting for you to start an amazing movie night