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millysastroblog · 2 years ago

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RANDOM ASTRO NOTES 💋💄

💄Hello, guys I’m back with a simple decent Astro observation. So yeah , noo dragging and arguments over here. If u want drama and tea you probably will have to wait for a while 😅!

Anyways enjoy yourself as always ;)

💋 Uranus in the 5th house is an underrated creative placement , they come up with the wildest creative ideas ever 💡

💋 Moon air sign in the 4th house ppl love to communicate with their family , these are people who constantly need to call and message their loved ones📞

💋7th house stelliums don’t feel comfortable being all on their own.

💋Moon conjunct Saturn , Saturn in the 4th house look like Stone cold , heartless bitches, but they are not. They hide any kind of vulnerable emotions to protect themselves from criticism, abandonment and being misunderstood . It’s an protective shield that they build from young adolescents . they close their hearts , so nobody can enter in it to use their vulnerability against them. # past childhood trauma # pls give them a hug 🤗

💋moon , Venus Aquarius ,11th house love to be around their friends ,they feel emotionally connected to them , sooooo better not fuck with their friends!!!! ( not in a sexual way, you get what I mean right?? Yeah!)

💋Jupiter in the 2nd and 6th tend to have a huge appetites.

💋Sun square moon can make for indecisive individuals.

💋Sun conjunct moon Moon on the other hand can be very decisive and strong headed . Not always in a negative way , but what they feel or say is something they’ll rarely change for anybody.

💋 Neptune is the 11th use technology , phone, social media as escapism.

💋Neptune in the 7th , Venus- Neptune , Venus in Pisces use relationships as escapism,focus is heavily directed to love life. Forgetting anything and everything when In love 😍!

💋Mercury in Sagittarius, Mercury- Jupiter aspects can cut your soul with their bluntness. #Gordon Ramsay

💋 Venus in 4th, Jupiter in the 4th house can come from a pretty, good, wealthy, stable family’s.

💋 Jupiter in the 12th house are spiritualy connected and protected by the divine ,since birth . They naturally love to practice spiritual stuff like meditation, yoga, tarot, etc.

💋Aries , Gemini, Capricorn ,Scorpio are the most disliked zodiac signs in astrology !

💋Moon in the 4th house if good aspected feel a close connection towards their mummy . 😚

💋Sun in the 4th house are very loyal to their mum.

💋Moon in Aquarius/ 11th house are somehow everybody’s bestie 🦋✌🏽.

💋Moon in the 12th house ppl need isolation and distance from ppl more than everything.

💋Aries , Taurus , Scorpios, Sagittarius ppl can not be controlled or told what to do !

💋 Mars in the 10th house if negatively aspected can argue and fight with their parents, bosses people who have power over them , they hate to be controlled and told what to do , troublemaker for rebelling structures and rules.

💋Mars/ Uranus in the 1st are generally chaotic troublemakers, rebelling against everything and anything that comes their way.

💋Pluto in the 3rd /11th , Lilith in the 3rd/11th house could have been, badly bullied when younger have ppl spitting on them ,cutting their hair, just awful things happening to them # protect these babies 😣😢!!

💋 Uranus in the 1st, 4th,7th, 10th,11th tend to feel weird , unique, different from others .

💋Pluto in the 11th have very profound intense close friendships, they love or hate their friends with all their heart, calling and checking up on them, telling dark hidden secrets to each other, being ride or die friends for one another. When I die I’ll take care of ur family type of friendships, strong, deep sexual friendships ( fwb) situations if connected to the 7th house ruler or Venus !!!

💋Pluto in the 6th house are either very organized, punctual, ocd , clean freak or the complet opposite having a chaotic room, chaotic schedule, doing everything or nothing at the moment , extreme daily living to the point of burn out, exhaustion or even sickness.

💋Venus -Jupiter = over shopping, spending, buying.

💋Venus-Saturn= hoarding money, stingy, observing Bank out daily, making plans on how to increase income.

💋Mercury in Capricorn have an interesting tone of voice, when they speak people tend to quietly listen to what they have to say. Good in arguments. They just can demanding respect because of how serious and engaged they are in a conversation. Business minded 🫰🏽💵

💋Pluto in the 3rd / Mercury - Pluto voices are deeeepp, intense,loud just so intriguing and addictive to listen to, especially the men omg they have the most seductive voices. 🥵

💋Chiron, Neptune in the 3rd might have siblings or classmates who make fun of how they speak, not listening to what they have to say, ignoring them or not believing what comes out their moth.

💋Moon in the 3rd house can be very emotionally attached to their siblings, always communicating and spending lots of time with them.

💋Sun conjunct Neptune are kind, empathetic , sensitive and intuitive souls just like Pisces Sun !

💋Chiron in the 1st/ 10th house don’t like pictures taken of them or being filmed, very self conscious about how they are perceive by others.

💋 Capricorn Rising / Saturn in the 1st are waaaayyy grown before their actual time. These ppl can fake their whole existence based on how old they look, entering in clubs at literally the age of 15 , Early bloomers ! #apperance

💋Taurus Rising/Sagittarius/ Libra is a placement that usually indicates having a big ass, wide hips, and strong big things 🍑👀!

Thx for reading 💕

•~Milly~•

#astro notes #astro community #astro observations #astro placements #astro posts #astrology #astroloji #astroblr #astrology asteroids #writing #funny stuff #astro love #astro #astro predictions

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kanakori · 2 months ago

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i hate the culture of "kinning" and the lack of media literacy in fandom because you cannot express that you relate to morally grey/complicated/evil characters in any way because people will either assume you're admitting you're some cartoonishly evil psychopath or that you're one of those insufferable joker incel type dudes

like for example, i personally relate to a lot of iasip dennis' internal struggles and some of his shitty behavior (+ as someone who struggles with moral ocd and who also acknowledges their behavior can be shitty and awful, seeing that behavior in a character is a big eye opener and has been a really valuable tool for me in both realizing that "oh fuck, that's shitty, i do that" or "hey, my ocd is saying i behave like this but i genuinely don't, maybe i'm not evil") but some people will just hear "i relate to dennis" and immediately think that im some homicidal sexual predator??

which like, first of all, is a complete mischaracterization of dennis and oversimplifies his character in an awful way that, in my opinion, disrespects the whole writing team and the show in general (there are plenty of really good character analyses of him on this website that articulate it better but im assuming you understand what i mean) but also, when did i say i relate to everything he does? when did i say i believe everything he believes? why cant you just casually relate to characters instead of Kinning them with your entire soul and claiming you're an exact living copy of said character???

#anyways i love you its always sunny in philadelphia and your brilliant character development #dennis reynolds #its always sunny in philadelphia

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 1 year ago

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AITA for shutting down somebody’s claim of ‘narcissistic abuse’?

Before you scroll down to vote YTA- I am the one being mistreated.

My (early 20’s) mother (early 40’s) is. A lot. She’s incredibly emotionally immature, yells at me for mistakes she makes, minimizes other peoples’ mental health struggles, and is all around just generally Not Great To Live With.

I was venting to a friend (mid-20’s) about her and they said ‘That’s classic narc abuse. I hate narcissists’ this set me off because I think demonizing any mental illness is ableist and unhelpful. I told them this. I asked them not to claim my mother is a narcissist and blame it on why she’s treating me the way she is. They blew up at me saying that I’m defending narcissists and they shouldn’t have kids anyways. I told them that, again, demonizing mental health the way they are is a slippery slope and you can just call my mother a shitty person without claiming a mental illness (I genuinely don’t think she has NPD- she’s just shitty. But that’s not the point) and basically they told me to fuck off and stop defending evil people, that narcissistic people are ALWAYS the problem, blah blah blah. I said that people with NPD can be good people and being mentally ill doesn’t make you evil. They told me “mental illness makes people act weird and creepy, like I don’t trust people with OCD. Plus they gatekeep intrusive thoughts”. I have OCD. They know this. I’ve asked them not to call ‘eat leaf’ and shit intrusive thoughts. They called me a psycho over it for MY intrusive thoughts. At this point I told them ‘thanks for showing me you were never actually my friend.’ And blocked them. I feel awful about it and I’m going into a thought spiral that maybe I am in the wrong here?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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lhazaar · 8 months ago

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hey. i'm turning my chair around and sitting in it backwards now because i want to speak specifically to people with ocd. this is a targeted post and is not meant to apply to the userbase of this website at large or to serve as a policy decision.

hi. do you know what scrupulosity means? it is a strong, intense, often painful concern about morality or religion. it's very common for religious people with ocd, actually—the fear that you've sinned, that you will sin, that your thoughts themselves are sinful. you're afraid of being an evil person. every thought and feeling you have is scrutinized to exhaustion in case it's proof that you're evil. this also happens for non-religious people with ocd, it's just that ours will look different; it's often a preoccupation with social justice issues. you care a lot about being a good person, right! most people do. you want to be a good person, you want to be kind to others and to dismantle oppressive systems where you can. i'm making some assumptions here, but they're based on my specific audience base.

so, there's this thing that happens online, especially on tumblr and twitter—not because bluh bluh platforms bad, but because of the ways in which information is propagated on here. people used to tag for these posts sporadically but don't do so as much anymore. you know posts that exhort you, the reader, specifically, to take action? they tell you not to look away, not to bury your head in the sand. they tell you to give and to agitate and to donate time, money, resources.

those posts used to make me intensely, deeply anxious. i don't mean mild agitation, i mean life-ruining, day-occupying panic that seizes your entire body, and thoughts that don't leave your brain. guilt that paralzyes you because you, personally, cannot go kill the politicians responsible. you don't have enough money to do more than donate a few dollars, and sometimes you don't even have that. but because of where you live, because of the fact that you have internet access and you're literate enough to read these posts, you know that you have a level of privilege that most people never will. you're aware of that privilege because you're reasonably in-tune with social justice movements and you've probably spent some time dissecting your own privilege to examine your biases. (that's not a bad thing; i'm not here to condemn that. stay with me, if you can.)

there's a thing that can happen if you've lived with ocd like this for a long time where you become kind of incapable of telling what's addressed to you personally and what isn't. everything feels like a personal exhortation. you have trouble saying no, or knowing when you're overextended, because other people have it worse. how dare you enjoy relative comfort when people are being bombed or drowning in a climate change -induced flood or being crushed to death in a crowd panic. how dare you not be aware of it at all times, always, constantly. how dare you look away. don't look away.

i want to tell you about something i went through, if that's okay. a lot of people who follow me will already know this, but i haven't talked about this aspect of it very much publicly. in 2020, while visiting my partner in southern oregon, we had to evacuate from wildfires twice in under 24 hours. that was a really, really bad fire season, caused and perpetuated by a combination of global climate change and colonialization practices that destroyed traditional indigenous fire management strategies across the west coast of north america. fires stretched from bc to california. we wound up fleeing south, and then had to flee back north again, hemmed in on three sides. i flew back home to bc shortly afterwards, and i have this vivid, awful memory of seeing my home mountain range, the cascades, choked out with smoke from the window of an airplane. the woman in front of me sobbed the entire time until we touched down.

i remember thinking at that time that it was insane the entire world wasn't stopping. what i was experiencing was apocalyptic in scale—the fire we ran from the first time was part of a complex that chewed up entire towns. it wasn't the first fire season, nor the worst for the continent, nor the world. but all i could think in the moment was why aren't we doing anything, this is going to be all of us in a decade, why are people looking away.

if i had gone online and posted that, it would not have been morally wrong of me. there's no ascribing morality to a reaction like that. i mean, if i'd gone to someone who suffered in the years prior in australia or california and told them that ours was So Much Worse, that would have made me an asshole, but i didn't do that. i made some upset facebook posts targeted at the trump voters in my family, but i had no way to express at the time the sort of clawing panic of WHY AREN'T PEOPLE DOING ANYTHING??

the answer to that, which you probably know, is: what would they have done? we were sheltered by friends we evacuated with, but what power did a mutual in new york or wales or singapore have to affect a wildfire in oregon?

so, come back to the present day with me again, if you will. i said above that posts worded like this used to make me really, really anxious. in the span of time after the fire, i developed ptsd, and my ocd ruined my life. i took an extra year to graduate after i'd finished all my coursework because i could not send in the forms required. i was too busy spending 10-16 hours a day rearranging furniture in my room, or lying in bed, full-body tense, until it felt like my teeth would crack from the pressure. i'm medicated now. i'm grateful for it. i have more tolerance for these posts because i've been there. i know the op isn't doing anything wrong, because they're not wrong. why isn't the world stopping to look at a natural disaster, or a genocide? the world should not be like this.

you are not the world. you are someone with a brain that will torture you to death given the chance. you know how learning to reckon with your privileges, whatever they may be, requires you to not try and escape them? you need to be able to hold in your head that yes, you benefit from something that isn't fair; yes, other people should have that benefit, and that they don't is unjust. but you need to, for example, not try and weasel your way out of being white because you're uncomfortable with the guilt that it produces. you need to not go online and say well not ALL americans because you can't sit with the idea of being complicit in american imperialism. if you have ocd, you need to apply that to your own brain, too. you need to apply it to every post that you see. you need to know that people are not speaking directly to you, they are crying out in pain and fear. they are not doing anything wrong. they are scared and hurting.

they do not benefit from you taking on all the guilt of that fear and pain. i am not saying this to absolve you of the guilt. i am saying that you need to be able to exist with that level of guilt without allowing it to paralyze and destroy you. if you can't do that right now, i'm not here to cast judgement on you. blacklist phrases. i had "wildfire" blacklisted for a long time. i'm sure i missed aid posts because of it. the alternative was me being nonfunctional. for a long time, i had donation posts blacklisted across the board, because the way my ocd worked meant that i was neurologically incapable of knowing where my own limits were, and i would give money i did not have. if you need to do that, this is me giving you permission. doing this does not make you evil. it does not make you morally bankrupt. it makes you someone whose brain is trying to fucking kill them, and the world needs you to not let that happen.

this is not a post about how you're exempt from caring about the world if you're mentally ill, it's about how you cannot apply that care to anything useful if you're having massive panic spirals every other day about the guilt that you feel. your guilt should not rule your life. if it does, i say this kindly, but you very likely need medication. i'm sorry if you don't have access to that right now. you cannot think your way out of ocd. you cannot think your way into stopping neural activity. you cannot guilt your way into being a good person; you have to be able to exist with the guilt and not let it rule you in order to do that. nobody benefits from your brain trying to martyr you in the name of solving the world's suffering.

you need to be able to function, free of crushing and paralyzing guilt, before you can help anyone. you are not an effective ally like this just because your brain tells you that it's necessary.

#bark bark #ocd tag #actually ocd #also i want to say this now: if you do not experience ocd i do not want your 'well actually' takes on this.#again. this is not a site-wide thing i think everyone should do #do not mistake this for me saying that it's ~okay~ to be wilfully ignorant about genocide or climate disaster #i am speaking to a very specific clinical population whose brains do not work in a way that people outside of that population understand #the guilt you experience with ocd is not the same guilt that everyone has just turned up #it warps your entire personality. it warps your sense of right and wrong #you will deal with it for your entire life unfortunately #(even medicated i still absolutely have Intense White Guilt episodes lol #i just try not to make them my loved ones' problem #because part of handling pathological guilt has to be responsibility without overresponsibility)

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ikamigami · 3 months ago

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I do not get how Sun can be blamed for Eclipse, there’s so many reasons why not

Sun AND Moon had no idea he was there, even Moon erroneously thought he just left some inert code in there that wouldn’t turn into something, but Sun had no idea because Moon never told him and Eclipse didn’t say anything right up until after July 16th

They blaming Sun’s bad thoughts is some of the most victim-blaming nonsense I’ve ever heard, this is the kind of belief people with OCD rail against because EVERYBODY has bad thoughts and/or intrusive thoughts, especially if they’re as abused and neglected as Sun is, the only thing that matters is if you act on them and Sun never did, he’s not evil for just having mean thoughts, it’s an excuse

Some argue Eclipse was upset with Sun for not standing up for himself and that’s why but that’s also nonsense, this is about as idiotic as Moon abusing Sun to “make him have a spine”, that’s NOT how you do it that’s basic abuse 101, if Eclipse was really seeing Sun’s true thoughts on his mistreatment and really cared he wouldn’t have made Sun’s life twice as awful

And then there’s Solar, living proof every choice Eclipse made didn’t have to happen, he could’ve chosen to be better at any point and all the bad was his choice, Solar proves he could’ve approached this all differently and got what he wanted sooner, he didn’t have to make himself everyone’s enemy, or at least Sun’s enemy as Sun even tried to plead with him even AFTER July 16th(which says something because they didn’t know about Bloodmoon, they thought Eclipse did it, so Sun trying to make nice with and beg the presence that killed the children he was closest too is a lot, even if it’s partially out of fear he had every right to hate Eclipse but he instead tried making peace)

All of the arguments people give for blaming Sun for Eclipse really irk me as it is victim-blaming, the one who’s far more responsible is Moon because he made Eclipse in the first place, but instead of just focusing on the perpetrator Eclipse just had to lash out at Sun instead

You're absolutely right, dear anon! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with me ^^

I needed this more than you could think

My theory or take on this is that despite Eclipse hearing Sun's most deep hidden thoughts he didn't understand Sun..

I mean I think that Sun's inner thoughts were intrusive thoughts and thoughts that he's bad.. so I think that this is where Eclipse's words came from.. that Sun isn't better than them and he's just lying.. and he tried to show that to Moon..

But despite that Sun didn't stand up for himself.. despite Eclipse being sure that Sun would be capable of doing so and more.. Sun not only didn't stand up for himself but also he stayed with Moon and believed in him..

Hence Eclipse's words that he hated how Sun was handling himself..

Eclipse doesn't understand Sun.. he doesn't know that Sun's inner thoughts - from what I've gathered - are just his delusional perception of himself with also intrusive and impulsive thoughts and paranoia..

None of the things that happened to Eclipse were Sun's fault.. and yeah Eclipse should've focus more on Moon for leaving him behind abandoning him in Sun's head.. and for being abusive towards Sun as Eclipse could only watch..

Same was with Moon at the beginning.. instead of being angry at FazCo. he had to lash out at Sun who was nice and tried to help him..

Sun was really unfairly treated in life.. he got the worst hand..

And Eclipse was too bitter to care.. but I think that he still felt something.. because he was shocked by Sun's outbursts.. because he doesn't understand Sun..

And I think that he realized that Sun wasn't at fault like previous versions of him thought.. but I agree with goodolddumbbanana that Eclipse doesn't like to admit that he's wrong hence why he acts like the Sun from eaps is actually just like our Sun was.. even if that's not true.. but I think that he's just projecting to not have to face the truth fully.. because then he had to admit that he was wrong and he had to apologize for what he's done to Sun.. (even though it wasn't exactly him but he treats it like that)

But you're absolutely right that fans are awful for victim blaming Sun for Eclipse's situation.. because none of this was his fault.. even a tiniest bit..

Sun doesn't deserve such treatment especially when we see how much he tries to be better and do good and be kind.. despite everything..

Thank you once again, dear anon ^^

#anon #dear anon #anon ask #ask answered #sun and moon show #sams #sams sun #sams moon #sams eclipse #eaps eclipse #tw abuse #tw delusion

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shsl-heck · 8 months ago

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One thing that's had me thinking about Amy lately, is the tension between disgust and desire. She is horrified by the immensity of her desire for Victoria, but the shame and guilt over it can only ever make it worse. Fear and arousal, disgust and desire, all of them bleed into each other (we see this constantly in both porn and horror). It's like she has this splinter at the core of her being and she either cant realize or wont accept that the more and more she digs for it to try to get it out, the deeper she's driving it into herself. She cannot remove this without help from someone else. (Coincidentally, not being able to recognize that her attempts to do/be what she's supposed to are only making things worse is also what leads to the Enwretchening)

I'm aware there's a reading of Worm in which Amy's attraction to Victoria is purely an expression of a kind of morality focused ocd, but I personally think that's less interesting. She definitely experiences some level of that (the urge to fuck up a baby she's healing followed by disgust with herself is like a perfect example of an intrusive thought associated with that brand of ocd), but I think this is a case of *and* rather than *or*. My reading of Amy is that of a deeply lonely and emotionally neglected child clinging to the one person in her life that gives her any form of affection, whose attachment only gets increasingly complicated as she starts to grow up and realizes she is attracted to women.

She has never been treated as part of the family, has always felt on some level that she's only playing at being a sister to Victoria, and she is dealing with that during a stage of her life that is turbulent at best for even people raised in a healthy functional environment. There is a broad cultural taboo around sex and desire, but there's a special sort of self-loathing and fear that you're somehow predatory for finding someone attractive that a lot of queer people experience due to the stigma surrounding their sexuality and/or gender. Homoeroticism and attraction is seen as disgusting and fundamentally wrong by society no matter what. It is especially disastrous for Amy because even though she's never been able to see herself as Victoria's sister, she knows she's supposed to, and that adds a whole new layer of guilt and shame to even a passing thought about Victoria being attractive.

Then she triggers. Suddenly she not only has to pretend to be Amy Dallon the well behaved unintrusive family member, she has to be Panacea, the girl who performs miracles. She doesn't even have a secret identity to fall back on for privacy because of New Wave's gimmick. Any resentment about her role, or desire to live a normal life become more proof that she is a sick, evil person; a parasite who has wormed her way into the Good and Heroic Dallon-Pelham family and is eating away at them from the inside-out.

Even as it forces her to repress more and more of herself, Panacea also offers Amy what is seemingly her only chance to be Good like her family. Healing people isn't just something she has to do in order to avoid being a terrible person, but also how she can atone for everything else that's Bad about her. Saving people is a way to try to purge herself of the desire for Victoria, and to prove that she can be a Dallon in more than name.

Like, as awful and lesbophobic as Wildbow's handling of Amy was, there is something deeply compelling and even relatable about her to me. She perfectly captures an emotional state that I've struggled (and failed) to explain as I wrote and rewrote this post. It's the hunger, the guilt, the shame, the fear, the loneliness that settles on your skin like frost as a child when you accept that there must be something wrong with you, because if there wasn't then you wouldn't have to try so hard to be good.

#i am placing my head in a bear trap by posting about Amy like this but here it is #this post has sat in drafts for months #being periodically chipped away at and rewritten a thousand times #but i think this is as good as it's going to get for now #the real takeaway here is that I think Amy should hang out with Green Eyes from Pact #maybe even start a club for girls who are sosososo lonely and disgusted by themselves that they should eat people about it #wormblr #worm web serial #worm wildbow #amy dallon #worm spoliers

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dead-dolphins · 3 months ago

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hi ro! i was curious is there any kind of fanfic you don’t like?

I’m not a big fan of discussing what I don’t like in fanfics because I really respect the time and effort that goes into creating them. It can be a lot of work, and I don’t want to come across as critical or dismissive of someone’s hard work. Instead, I think it’s more helpful to focus on what I enjoy in fanfics. This way, I can share what I love reading, and you’ll get a clearer picture of my tastes. Plus, I understand that fanfics are personal and created by fellow fans, so they don’t have to fit perfectly with my preferences. Everyone’s creative expression is valuable, and I appreciate all the different ways people bring their stories to life. ❤️❤️❤️

That being said, let me tell you the things I ABSOLUTELY LOVE AND ADORE in the fics I read:

A Little Plot: I really enjoy fanfics that have some kind of plot, even if it's just a small one. I’m someone who gravitates towards stories with a bit of structure, so you'll often find me drawn to fics that have more than just a snapshot of a moment.

Unexpected Twists: If you've been following me here, you probably know that one of my all-time favorite fics is Around the Corner by Ili Akkaman. I adore it because it starts with a classic rivals-to-lovers setup, but then my amazing mentor Ili throws in an incredible plot twist with a thrilling police storyline. So, if your fic promises one thing and then delivers something unexpected, I'll be there with popcorn, enjoying every moment!

Fluff and Cuteness: I’m a sucker for those sweet, tender moments between Eremika. I love seeing them completely wrapped up in each other and unable to keep their hands off one another. If you include adorable, domestic scenes of them living their best life together, you’ll have me absolutely squealing with delight. The canon was already pretty tough on them, so why not let them have some happiness?

Worldbuilding: For me, there’s nothing more captivating than worldbuilding. It’s a true testament to a writer’s incredible creativity. Crafting an entire world with its own rules and foundations is no small feat, and when I come across something like that, I’m genuinely in awe of the imagination behind it. It’s like a creative feast that leaves me amazed and inspired!

Consistency: I’m definitely a creature of habit, so I really appreciate consistency in stories. When a narrative stays true to its established world and rules, it’s a joy to read. My slight OCD tendencies mean I can get thrown off by unexpected changes, so a well-crafted, consistent story is something I’ll dive into and enjoy fully.

Character Development: This is absolutely my biggest passion! I adore seeing characters evolve and grow throughout a story. For me, it's like experiencing a journey of personal growth right alongside the characters, and I can't get enough of it. If a fic offers deep, meaningful character development, you can bet I'll be all over it. The more, the better—I’ll devour them eagerly! And bonus points if the character development is consistent and true to the story.❤️❤️❤️

Man in Love with Only One Woman, Woman in Love with Only One Man: In my country, we have a saying, "God, Country, and Family," which reflects a traditional and conservative view. I hope that doesn’t come across the wrong way! Basically, I really enjoy traditional romances where Eren is devoted solely to Mikasa, and Mikasa feels the same way about Eren. I find great satisfaction in fics where the love between the two characters is exclusive and unwavering (but I do like Eren having more experience than Mikasa tou)

Well, that's basically what I like! I hope this kind of answer your ask and just please, please, please, just a friendly reminder for next time: try asking about what you enjoy rather than what you don’t like. Remember, fics are created with a lot of time and effort, and everyone here is just exploring their own creativity. It’s more uplifting to focus on the positive aspects and celebrate what resonates with you!

#eremika #anon convo #fics #writing fics

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princessofmarvel · 2 years ago

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Gold Rush

summary | renfield starts falling for his friend, and the feelings he starts to get scare him.

pairing | robert montague renfield x fem!reader

wc | 838

genre | a little angsty, but mostly fluff!

warnings! | not really proofread! but other than that nothing that i can really think of!

requested? | yes! i loved this one, thank you so much for sending it in! author's note! | hey everyone! this is a part of the swift series, so keep sending the requests! and as always, i do i have really bad OCD that causes me to write in some random capitalization, and punctuation, But I think that we don't have to worry about that in this fic lol. And let me know if there are any mistakes, but please be kind!

Renfield had been living his best life recently. He had gotten rid of his old boss, had a new job that he could do from home, had started putting time aside for himself, he had even gotten a cat. The cat was probably his favorite because he had met this wonderful woman on his way home from getting the cat.

“Oh they are so cute!” She said as he was walking down the street to bring the cat home. He could not take his eyes off hers. He could just fall into them “Do they have a name yet?”

“No, not yet.” He said while scratching the top of the cat's head. “Do you have any suggestions?”

Ever since that day, he hung out with the girl whose name he learned to be (Y/n). He liked having a friend. Someone he could always go to. He was with her the day he felt everything change in their relationship.

“Oh what is this film?” He said while leaning in on the couch.

“It’s Star Wars, Robert,” She says with a laugh. “It’s one of the biggest films that there is”

“I never had time to see anything, Dracula made sure that I was always busy.” He says while leaning back on the couch when the movie ends. “That was brilliant.”

“I agree, You really liked it, huh?” She said with a huge smile, and turned towards him. In that moment, where she looked like she was the most comfortable she had ever been, and her smile shined so bright. He felt his heart stop in a way that it hadn’t in years.

“Yes, I did.” He said in a soft voice, while keeping eye contact. He felt himself leaning in, as he started to get closer, his cat jumped onto her lap, causing the tension to break.

He got his cat and left in a hurry that night. Scared of what he was feeling, he ran to talk to Rebecca, but she didn’t help him much. She told him that he was falling for her. That scared him even more so he left and just went back home.

He avoided her, as much as he could for a few weeks. He had not felt this way in such a long time, he didn’t even know what to do. How do dates go nowadays? What kinds of dates were appropriate now? What do you do on dates now? How long do you date until you propose? He knew that had changed to longer than it was back when he was getting married. He was just so nervous, and scared.

Renfield decided to see her again, so he went to the flower shop close to her apartment, and got her favorite flowers. He knocked on her door, the nerves getting to him again. When she opened the door, she looked at him for a second, and shut the door in his face, not even saying anything. He stood there for a minute, before he decided to knock again, this time when she answered, she had her hand on her hip, and looked annoyed. “What?”

“I-I wanted to apologize, and explain.” Renfield said as he pushed the flowers in front of him to her. Hoping that she would take them. “Please?”

She thought for a moment, before taking the flowers and motioning for him to come in. She went to fill a vase with water as Renfield decided to start talking again.

“I got scared” He blurted out. “I started feeling things for you that I have not felt in ages. I didn’t know what to do.”

She sighed, and looked at him. “You could have just talked to me”

“I know that, Rebecca yelled at me, and said that I was ‘ghosting’ you, she said that it was a horrible thing to do to someone, I felt awful and ran over immediately.” He said while walking closer to her. “I am so sorry (Y/n)”.

He started down at her, the same stare that he gave her the day he started feeling for her. He leaned in, and did not stop himself this time. He kissed her lightly, waiting to see what she would do. She placed a hand on the side of his face and kissed him back. When they pulled away, they just looked at each other for a minute.

“Let me do this properly, let me take you out to dinner, (Y/n), please?” He stared at her and hoped that she would say yes.

“Yes, see, was that so hard to do?” She said with a smile, and a light laugh.

“Tonight?” He suggested while placing the flowers that he got her, in the vase.

“Tonight works great.” She said, while taking the vase to place by the window. “I do have a question though,” He said while sitting down on her couch. “How long do people wait to get married now?” Right after he said it, he was rushing over to catch her from falling.

#renfield #renfield imagine #renfield fanfic #renfield x reader #renfield fluff #robert montague renfield #r.m. renfield #renfield fic #renfield movie #nicholas hoult #nicholas cage #ben shwartz #awkwafina

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imagionationstation · 7 months ago

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Okay so I wanna make a 2012 separated au but I wanna add a rise villain lol

basically

Leo’s raised by Splinter

Raph’s raised by Shedder

Donnies raised by BM

and Mikey’s raised by April or the Kraang idk yet

mainly I think it’d be funny if BM spoiled Donnie and you just get spoiled rich boy Donnie idk lmao

— ♊️

NAH BUT THE FIRST TIME I READ A 2018DONNIE ADOPTED BY BIG MAMA FIC, MY BRAIN WENT “What if that was 2012Donnie?” AND I’VE NEVER RECOVERED BC I WANNA BUT IT’S SO OUT THERE THAT I’VE NEVER HAD THE GUTS TO TRY-

(I am so, so sorry, this has spiraled over the last few days. I am weak. Resistance was futile.)

Okay, so, like 2012 universe but Yokai exist…

So I’m going to assume right off the bat that Leo&Mikey don’t know about the Hidden City because they’re being raised by a human (Kirby) and a previous human (Splinter). How these two managed to get their hands on baby mutant turtles, I couldn’t tell you.

Okay, so I’m going to assume Leo&Mikey meet first. Both living as vigilantes in the human world, they’re bound to run into each other at some point. I doubt Splinter would let Leo travel to the surface solo. So maybe Splinter starts taking him up earlier because he deems keeping the tike with him is safer than leaving him alone.

So they get to know the surface early on. Mikey, because he sneaks out whenever he can, and Leo, because Splinter introduced it to him.

They besties who think it’s neat that they look like twins.

And then they come across Raph.

Now, a twin package is coincidence but a triplet turtle who looks scarily similar to them? That’s sus.

In fact, it’s the only reason that Raph doesn’t immediately kill them on site. He’s affronted, frustrated, and admittedly a little curious. So he decides to settle the mystery by taking them down to the Hidden City for a Mystical Relative test. (They are a thing because I say so.)

He knows the Hidden City exists because Shredder has dealings with Big Mama. They work out deals, where Raph fights in her Nexus and Shredder gets trinkets from the Hidden City.

Leo and Mikey are in awe, but also, they had a City that they could walk freely in beneath their feet the whole time?!

Then they take the test and- huzzah, they’re brothers!

And, oopsy, the witch lets it slip that they have another brother??

They press for more, but all she knows is that Big Mama will be their key to finding him.

So Leo and Mikey are determined to look and Raph is none to satisfied to learn that, not only is his family expanding and they’re both dorks, but now he has to deal with one of the biggest mob leaders in the City? No thank you. He did not sign up for that risk.

He tries to brush them off but Leo is adamant that he help- especially if he knows who she is and how they can arrange a talk with her. Even if it’s a long shot, they have to try.

So, Raph gives in to get them off his back.

And he introduces them to the best chance that they’re going to get to receiving an audience with her- And wouldn’t you know it?

That liaison is Donatello!

Of course, everyone knows that Donnie is of pure Yokai descendancy. Big Mama would never adopt some lost soul off the street. Rumors float about but no one knows for sure how he came into her care. The only truth that the Yokai know for certain is that he’s a genius, one in charge of all kinds of equipment for Big Mam’s Battle Nexus.

But, anyway, Donnie doesn’t fit into the brothers’ physical quota.

Normally, nobody can get close to Donatello, but the minute Raph strolls into the Nexus and asks to speak with him- the genius spawns. Body guards are shooed away at the request for privacy as the intelligent turtle eagerly brings them to his workshop.

It quickly becomes clear why Raph was so reluctant. To say that Donnie was ecstatic to see him was an understatement.

Unfortunately for the loner turtle, he’d become a lock for Donnie’s OCD. And similar to how he sees April in canon, he’s (PLATONICALLY) smitten. His obsessive side makes Raph into his idol and his compulsions lead him to do everything possible to try and build a friendship. Even if that means disregarding every single one of his Mother’s rules when it comes to interacting with fighters.

Raph hates the attention, but Donnie’s their best shot.

And Donnie doesn’t hesitate to promise them a meeting.

I’m dying imaging them going on a hunt for a long-lost brother, and Donnie’s standing right there the whole time- 🤣

Assisting every step of the way in the search for himself, with everyone being 100% sure that it cannot possibly be him because Big Mama is good a sewing lies.

Donnie is absolutely a rich kid. He’s utterly mortified when he finds out that Leo actually lives in the sewers of all places.

This AU would be all the more hilarious if Donnie slowly starts to realize that Raph isn’t the perfect person that he thought he was, and the obsession calms, but then he finds out that he’s Raph’s brother and completely loses his ever loving mind.

It would be brilliant.

I imagine Big Mama to be a fun mix of self-centered but genuinely loving. I think that would be an interesting take for her to spend his lifetime using every available opportunity to take advantage of his skills and manipulate his actions… But also, she would wipe out everyone in the entire Hidden City for him in a heartbeat if she thought they posed him any real danger.

On that same note, I think about the episode where the RISE first meet her, and like, how she would react if Draxum came and launched vines not only at her, but at Donnie too. And she instantly loses her cool.

“I may have a revision to do. Big Mama has two rules. One does not steal from Big Mama, and NO ONE touches her tottering TURTLE.”

I just think she’d be great.

I keep coming back to this-

So I keep envisioning this moment somewhere in the future where the Kraang or somethin’ pose this huge threat, and Donnie (as manipulative as his mother when he wants to be, which isn’t often) is basically like “We are not making deals. I will find a way to go on this mission and I will probably die if you don’t give me reinforcements. You can support me and I’ll keep building for you, or you don’t and you’ll lose your heir.”

Not exact words but you get the gist.

He’s so stubborn in the show. I want to enhance that.

I just want him to bob between innocent and confident. His pride shatters at the slightest negativity, but he also knows exactly what to say to get what he wants. He’s a good boy, but he’s not a pushover to anyone but Raph and his Mother. He’s not a big fan of changing the terms at the last second, but that’s not to say he hasn’t before.

ALSO YOU CAN IGNORE THIS IF YOU WANT BUT I HAVE CONCEPT BECAUSE IT’S IN MY BRAIN NOW.

The very first time that Donnie saw a Battle Nexus fight, he’d been the ripe age of four years old.

His mother was sitting in her private viewing area, perfect as ever, as he stared down in the arena in awe. He’d been ecstatic to see the fights that his mother spoke so fondly of, studying the fighters curiously as they faced on another.

He quickly fell into the excitement, encouraged by his Mother’s laughter, cheering along with the crowd. That is, until he watched the gorilla Yokai pin it’s opponent to the ground and tear it’s arm clean off.

The scream of agony was drowned in the hollars of the crowd.

He feel silent, a cry tangled in his lungs for another reason altogether. He looked back at her, as she smiled and watched the crowd go nuts, and then sunk in her lap. He squeezed his eyes as shut as they could be, fists over them, and blood painted behind his lids. He moved his fists to the sides of his head, but he could still hear screams.

He could remember it so clearly. His mother turned him to look at her, peeling his fists away from where they pressed against skull. She had seemed disappointed, looking down on him. Then her expression relaxed as she cooed, “Is it to loud for my whisperous turtle?”

He nodded, desperately, as she waved one of her assistants over.

They took him to his room. He locked himself in the bathroom to sob, unable to erase the image of gore stains from his mind. He’d passed out, right there on cold tiles, and woke up pressed against his mother. Granted, he woke up screaming, sobbing, and certain he was drenched in his own blood, but she rocked him, calmed his fears, and sang him back to sleep. He slept uneasily in the safety of her hold.

He spent the next week refusing to leave the room.

Eventually, his Mother encouraged him out. A year later, she took him back to the Battle Nexus. The results didn’t change. It repeated for a few more years. The nightmares got progressively more gory.

When he was ten years old, she promised him that he never had to watch the fights if he didn’t want to. He waited until she was out of sight to crumble under the weight of relief and self-loathing, her frown permanently etched in his mind.

From that day on, Donnie made it his life’s mission to support her like she always supported him. He might not understand the arena, but everyone who visited the Hotel loved it. There was no end to the complements and requests that she received when they were attending to matters outside it. She lit up under the attention. He saw no harm in making weapons and armor for the fighters, rewarded with his mother’s glowing smile and proud laughter.

She loved to show him off. The sun to her earth, helping give life to what she’d created. He gave what she asked for, sprinkling his own inventions here and there. He preferred to focus on the defensive wear; she loved the offensive weaponry.

He actively did his best to avoid the arena.

…Until the first time he glimpsed Ribenji on her screens.

Ribenji means vengeance in Japanese. Because Shredder is obsessed with it. And Raph will be his ultimate warrior of vengeance against anyone who crosses his path. Hehe. I think I’m cool.

I don’t pretend to fully understand Big Mama. I just love writing her.

Does Donnie’s name change? Perhaps.

Though I suppose I could see Big Mama having an interest in the Renaissance. That might be something up her alley…

I’M NOT DONE WITH THIS CONCEPT ACTUALLY

“Donnie dearest.” Donnie doesn’t look up from his work, wielding the last of the armor in place. He’s down on one knee and it allows his mother easy access to the top of his head, planting a kiss before stepping back to let him finish. “How’s my lil’ turtley-boo doing with Mama’s big project?”

“Almost finished.” He promises, turning off the wielder. She’s never pleased when he works and talks. She claims it makes her feel less to his work, and he’d never want to make her feel insecure.

A hand is on his shoulder, keeping him on the ground as she knocks against the metal with deceptively delicate knuckles. “Did you add the mystic fiddeydoodles that I so graciously found for you and you so endlessly prodded me for?”

Donnie feels a blush creep up his cheeks. He hadn’t wanted them at first, but after she’d mentioned how influential they were to putting on a perfect show, he couldn’t resist a couple of requests. “Not yet, Mother. I’m working on it. I swear. It will be ready when you need it.”

He studies her face, imploring, and she smiles down at him. She lifts her hand. “I know you will, my little genius. You always keep your promises.”

“I’m taller than you.” He points out as he stands, rather than acknowledge the twist of nerves which reminds him that even one failure could tear at her trust in him.

“Perhaps in this form.” She taps her broach and then she’s hovering over him, smirking with a flair that makes him rolls his eyes. “But you’ll always be my little teensie weensie tottering turtley-boo.”

“Mother.” He mumbles as he takes off his goggles. His face grows hot, glad for the seclusion of his lab. “I’ll be fifteen in three days.”

“That you will.” She hums, brushing his cheek with one of her smaller appendages. “My magnifferent, brilliant boy.”

She turns away to examine another of his projects. The only reason that she visits the lab is to get a run down of his latest one. He loves that she has a genuine interest in his work, even if she’s not particularly interested in the construction itself. She supplies his needs and works with his wants. What more could a turtle ask for?

At the same time that Donnie wants to shrivel up and hide when under her undivided affection, he can’t help but appreciate the attention. He never knows when he’ll get to have her doting every hour or if he’ll find himself isolated for a month.

Donnie quickly reprimands himself. They spoke about his intrusive thoughts. He shouldn’t think that way. He’s not completely secluded with the Hotel staff taking care of him and Gus hanging around. It’s all in his best interest. He’s safer within the hotel than out with the rif-raff in the bar or on the streets.

…It is nice to be noticed, though.

He steps closer to her, fiddling with the goggles. “Mother.”

“Yes, little one?”

She lifts one of his weapons from the table. He hopes she doesn’t test it. It’s not nearly to her fine expectations. “Have you- have you had any dealings with Saki, by chance?”

“Oh, my dormy genius. You know Mama hates talking business when we’re together.”

“Yes, Mother, of course.” He deflates a bit, watching her sigh.

“If you want to ask after his feisty Yokai pet, all you have to do is say it.”

“Have you seen Ribenji?” Donnie blurts eagerly. “Has he fought recently?”

“I don’t see your fascination with the Yokai when he barely gives you the time of day.”

“I know, Mother, I apologize for being this way.” He says, because it’s what she wants to hear. “But it’s been itching at my brain for some time. I was working on something for him, a side-project that could greatly improve his performance, not that it’s not good already, he’s a brilliant fighter, more than that, he’s inspiring and swift and he handles himself really well, which makes since for a Yokai Foot ninja, but I thought he might appreciate-”

“Donnie, dearest.” Mother sets his weapon down, and he quiets, running the strap along his hand. “I know you idolize the warrior, but please, no more side projects. Focus on your list. I don’t want you getting tuckered out.”

“But Mother-”

“Mama knows what’s best for you.” She tsks as she disappears behind her human form, a whirlwind of magic before she sets a hand in his arm. “This obsessing is unhealthy.”

“I was merely wondering if I could see some clips-”

“A wondering mind is a mind of worries.” She’s not scolding him, but it sure feels like it. The need to plead is still tangling in his airways, kept caged by the calm of her stare. “Refocus it on what’s important. Like your fantablous weaponry! And Mother will worry about her business with Saki.”

“But you always say that I should tell you when something bothers me.” He reminds quickly, ignoring her sharp look. “And it really bothers me that I haven’t been able to check in with one of your champions. Isn’t the arena meant to be mine one day?”

“Not for a good while yet.” She warns. “Until then, Mama would like to keep you away from the fiddlefaddles that bore you so.”

“Bore might not be the right word-”

“So you would like to resume your studies, then?” She looks at him, hand over her heart. “Why, you could have simply said so.”

He sighs, “You’re twisting again, Mother.”

“Do you or do you not want to give up your little hobby?”

“Oh, of course, I want to give up the one thing in the endless hotel that brings me any joy. I dream about it every night.”

“Always with the sarcasm.”

“Mother, please.”

“Mama has given her final word. A proper son knows when to debate and when to obey.”

He nods, shoulders slumping, and she considers him. She sets a gentle hand over the fist that holds his goggles, “Oh, my dear, you know it hurts me to see you disappointed. What if you were to finish your contrabulations and your beloved Mama were to see if she could get you some footage of the latest shows?”

“Oh, would you?” He breathes, daring to believe it.

She leans against him, on her toes to plant a kiss on his chin. “I will leave you to your work.”

Mother turns to leave, and he beams after her. “Thank you!”

A smooth backward wave. “Anything for my turtley-boo!”

I like to think she’d call him little to remind him of his place, tease him about the fact that he’s taller than most Yokai his age, and she sincerely still thinks of him as the tiny, weak turtle that she adopted more than a decade ago. She’s an excellent multitasker.

Anyway! Thank you for the dopamine! Sorry for the spiral!

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halloweenhorrors · 2 months ago

Text

» Headcanons for the different Paulo’s [pt 1]

Summary; These headcanons are all mixed about. There will be general and romantic headcanons on the different Paulo actors. Might update this with more added to it in the future.

I’ve decided to split this into multiple parts due to the fact I’m too impatient and wanna share what I’ve got so far and cause of the fact that I’m still in the works of making headcanons for some other actors/versions of Paulo. So enjoy what I’ve got so far and again please don’t be shy to give me any headcanons. I’d love to hear them! The links take you to the videos where I screen recorded the footage to make the gifs (minus babyface Paulo). Also there will be mention and/or use of y/n, (name), etc.

OG!Paulo (Gianni)

🎞️ Very reluctant about affection and such. Not because he doesn't necessarily want it, but because he isn't used to it. And also because he isn't used to being vulnerable around anyone. He's tolerant with your affections if you've lived this long, just don't expect it back immediately. He'll grow and learn to open up in the future.

🎞️ In this interview, the interviewer described Paulo as the following, “tense and jittery, clutching his jacket, constantly squirming and stammering as disturbing thoughts are shaped into words” which makes me feel like he has, what most could probably agree with me, ocd and adhd. Probably a sprinkle of bpd too.

🎞️ You'll never find him without his film camera. If you see him without it, run walk the other way. He becomes a perturbed mess without it in his hands. Not only because he uses it like a fidget relief but he does not like the idea of something happening and not having his camera with him to capture the moment. Dissociates at the knowledge he can't find the moment he just witnessed with his eyes.

🎞️ Absolutely hates modern technology with a passion. Will go into a hour long rant about how awful cgi as a whole is. Why fake someone getting impaled with a stake when you can recreate the real thing? His thought process for anything that "needs" cgi, for ex. the meg movie, shouldn't be made a movie in the first place if it requires cgi.

🎞️ Sleeps in his suit. Good luck trying to get him to wash it. Actually— good luck trying to get him to take a bath as well. Mf reaks. You’ll probably have to force him to bathe with his suit on so it’s basically killing two birds with one stone.

XX/16!Paulo (My favorite🫣)

🎬 Diva of them all. I'll die on this hill. The videos with him alone give it away.

🎬 Strong take on having ocd and bpd. Mf can go from having a screaming match, with Jack, Adaru, or one of his actors who isnt showing what he's wanting to capture, to being all romantic and flirty towards you moments after.

🎬 Demanding af. Literally expects you to drop anything and everything for him and basically be at his beck and call. He's tall af too so if he's demanding your love or attention and you don't give it to him immediately because your busy? No worries. He'll just scoop you up into his arms and carry you to where ever it is he wants you whether it be to cuddle on the couch or review film footage with him.

🎬 He’s also the most emotional, at least when showing it. Mf was tweaking during the 16 icon movie. Also when the interviewer made a comment about his teeth he literally goes, “what about my teeth? ☹️”. Ik he goes back to being all threatening after that but I’d like to imagine that little comment stuck with him for a few weeks.

🎬 Yknow that trope where the Big Bad doesn't give a single solitary fuck about anyone but their own desires, but their soft spot is their significant other? Yeah, he fits inside that little box real nicely. If anything happened to you he would kill anyone in his path.

🎬 Everything he does, no matter how big or small, has you at the forefront of his mind. You become his top priority once you catch his attention, and catch his attention you certainly have! It becomes kind of obsessive.

Baby Face!Paulo

📹 He's the most quiet of them all in my opinion and from what I've seen from video interactions. Could just be actor's choice but since this post is meant for headcanons, I like to think that he's selective mute. At least until an "actor" or guests makes one wrong move and he has to raise his voice at them. Overall he most likely will just silently pose his actors into whatever position he needs like those stop motion movies where they have to pose the clay figures.

📹 He’s very non expressive, his face is always neutral. Even if you flirt with him he doesn’t react, unless you look close enough to see his pupils dilate or if you put a hand on his pulse you’d notice a spike. It’s all internal. He’d mostly just react by hugging or gentle affection. He’s more actions than words.

📹 Literally sees red if anyone compares or thinks he looks younger than 30 (ik he’s canonically 49). You call him babyface? Little man? Baby boy? Will silently stare into your soul as he imagines all kinds of ways to film your death.

📹 The reason he has two different colored eyes is cause I assume it’s a style choice similar to like a two face reference to how in the video (Gianni’s commercial) he starts off with a normal eye color then slowly switch to pale white. I don’t think he did anything to get his eye to be a different color, I think it basically meant how him and the other icons are dead/immortal now that they’ve embraced fear and are under his influence.

Singapore!Paulo (Billy)

📼 Ngl, from my standpoint, he's the most insensitive and indifferent of the "Paulo versions" or actors. I know some may disagree and say Gianni's is the most authentic Paulo actor and while I do agree his performance was perfection, Singapore's version seems the most authentic in my mind because of the lack of videoed interactions and information about him. The main backstory for The Director as a character is that he left/fled from his home country to flee the police and continue creating his snuff films. It makes it all the more realistic to me that we wouldn't know much about him due to him trying to avoid police, making his films under the radar. Also he just looks intimidating, especially with the scar that we also know nothing about.

📼 This also makes it where he likes referring to the most random past events from his life at the most random times just to fuck with you for a reaction. The more absurd sounding, the better.

📼 Moving on..

📼 "Dating" is a very stretched word when it comes to Billy. Being who he is makes it impossible for him to love like the average person would, because of his dark tendencies having distorted him greatly over time. It's more probable for him to "possess" you as he views you more like a preferable muse than an actual partner.

📼 However, just because he can't mentally see himself as a lover doesn't mean he doesn't try physically. He doesn't particularly care if the outside world believes he can't, but behind closed doors? He's anything but that. He's very similar to Gianni with affection and such but is more reluctant earlier on.

📼 He surprisingly has a huge soft spot for you. After all you are his muse. You have never seen him being angry or even raise his voice in frustration infront of you even if you break his favourite expensive limited camera or changed the layout of his film rolls causing his OCD to irk. But he would just smile at you meanwhile he would peel anyone else’s skin for even doing a single mistake. In his eyes you can do no wrong.

#horror writes #halloween horror nights #paulo ravinski #the director #halloween horror nights singapore #hhn the director #yes I’m counting Billy as Paulo fight me #paulo ravinski x reader

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poindexters-labratory · 1 year ago

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Talk about your version of William or I will spill hallucinogenic nightmare gas all over your blog =3

OKAY, FINE, YOU FORCED MY HAND

...heheheheh. >:3

Hurricane William Afton Lore Dump Part One

!!CW Warning!!: mentions of abuse, religious trauma, religious OCD, alcohol abuse, underage drinking and drug use, and addiction

William Anise Afton was born October 10, 1947 in a wooded area of Reading, a borough in Berkshire, England, to a shit awful family. This family consisted of his father (Edward), mother (Grace), and four older siblings (two older brothers and two older sisters), making William the baby of the family. The way they were shit awful, I'm not going to get into.

He went to Catholic school until he was twelve and developed a pretty big obsession with death during primary school because of a belief that what was happening to him with his family was his fault, making him guilty of sin, therefore condemning him to Hell at the age of nine. This resulted in obsessive thoughts that had him believe that everywhere he went, he was in mortal danger and had to prepare himself to die. He was petrified of dying because he always believed he was just meant to go to Hell and be tortured even before he got older.

Psychology bit: OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) can be a wide range of obsessive thoughts combatted with a wide range of compulsive behavior. In William's case, he has obsessional intrusive thoughts about death and Hell, which leads him to stay away from situations where he could die and be tortured for eternity, which is the compulsion. He avoided streets, stairs, heights, etc. the best he could for a long time.

When he was twelve, his father took him away after he discovered the at-home circumstances were horrible for the youngest member of the family. William then moved to London with his father, and they lived in the place where Edward worked, which was a mechanic shop he supervised for the owner of a small company.

Edward Afton had always been cold and old-fashioned, he was a veteran of the second World War, Irish, and very smart. He was also a mean bastard, an alcoholic, and emotionally unavailable for his traumatized son that he called Billy (even though that was nowhere near William's name, no matter how many times he was told it was a nickname). Not to mention that William confused him, and Edward didn't like things he couldn't understand.

William had always been... different. He was a shy and quiet boy, nose always in a book, (Will's favorites being Alice in Wonderland, The Velveteen Rabbit, The Wind in the Willows, and whatever books he could find with fantastical animals involved), had stereotypically feminine interests and habits compared to his older brothers when they were growing up, and had an odd obsession with rabbits.

Edward tried for a few years to "fix" him, to make Will "more like a boy". This included getting him involved in fixing cars, which William took to quickly, and bullying him out of his habits. Seemingly.

At this point in time, William was feeling a lot of shame for his lack of masculinity, self-conscious about his appearance, teenage hormones going haywire as he wasn't developing to fit the description of what people said a man should look like, and his father seemingly hating him more every day. This drew him to a group of boys that roamed the streets of London around his father's workplace. They were tough, toxically masculine, everything William thought he was missing.

This is where we mention William has always been charming and charismatic. He's learned it from the books he's read, movies he's seen, and stories he's heard. It's how he got money, food, books, and short-term relationships out of people whenever he wanted/needed it. The people he's charmed generally liked him, even though he was a stupid kid. At fourteen, he joined the rocker group that roamed around where he lived.

For a few years, to the age of seventeen, he ran around with them, dressed like them, did what they did, and became increasingly loud, impulsive, spiteful, incredibly violent, very tall, developed his father's drinking problem, and a drug addiction (that he kept secret). He dropped out of secondary school and had no plans other than someday soon he'd curl up into a ball and die somewhere. He didn't really care if he died at that point in time, William was too exhausted to care, and he lost his belief in a god and an afterlife. All of that shit he heard in primary school was just a scary story.

Then he met Henry in spring of 1964. Henry Emily was a twenty-year-old American student attending one of the universities for an engineering degree. He was working in that mechanic shop, the same one his father supervised; a trade offer given to him by the owner who knew Henry's father when they both served in World War II. The trade was this owner would pay for Henry's schooling while Henry (who was a mechanical genius apparently) would work in this shop.

History Bit: The 1960s was regarded as the "counterculture decade" in America, and in England, "The Swinging Sixties". There were massive differences between the two countries' views on the changing world and the changing cultures between them. One of the biggest things that caused this culture shift was widespread television access, giving the younger generation access to the world around them. American society was also thrown into the Vietnam War with the draft being set in place in 1966. There were many American movements in the decade, such as civil rights, anti-war, and gay rights, all seen as a direct attack on the "American way of life". England didn't have much involvement in the Vietnam War, the new generation was trying to move past the post-war era their parents came from. This will become relevant later.

William and Henry met on the circumstances that Will was trying to steal some of his stuff. From all Will's rummaging around in his stuff, he discovered some drawings of Fredbear (at this point, just known as Fred). This seemed to snap William out of this stupor he'd been in because he also had an animal character he'd draw. A golden yellow rabbit with purple eyes, that wore a little bow and waistcoat. He just called it Bunny (generating names wasn't his strong suit).

William couldn't pass up on the opportunity to meet someone that actually liked the same things as him. So, they talked. And then talked some more. And then spent the entire day together. And then they became best friends. Henry was reserved, calm, and headstrong, able to balance out William's high energy and impulsive nature.

The two of them could talk for hours on end about their animal characters (autistic people at their finest), pretty soon associating them with the other. Animatronics just started as a joke, both of them having an appreciation for Walt Disney and his Audio-Animatronics. Then it kind of stopped being a joke when Henry started brainstorming ideas for how a giant singing bear might actually work.

History Bit: Walt Disney coined the term "Audio-Animatronic" in 1961, the first of their kind being Disney's "Enchanted Tiki Birds" debuting in the Disneyland Resort, June 23, 1963.

Throughout the year, they became closer, and William started to feel more and more like a person living a life instead of going through the motions to survive. His mental health started to get better and he was slowly starting to express himself in the ways that he wanted to. He broke away from the rocker subculture and gained some social independence, doing what he really enjoyed doing, which was talking to Henry about Fred and Bonnie (Bunny renamed), reading on everything to help them on their journey to making a giant animatronic, drawing the two characters together, being Henry's best friend, and he was very happy.

Henry invited William to come back to his hometown in Utah (which William had never even heard of) and their goal became getting him across the Atlantic, slowly working off of his addictions and dependences. They were talking about owning a restaurant now with Fred and Bonnie as entertainment, everything was going to be perfect. But then there was a wrench in that plan.

William got mixed up with an upper-class girl slightly older than him, nineteen-year-old Claire-Marie Schmidt. He got her pregnant and neither of them wanted to abort the pregnancy and William didn't want to leave her to deal with this by herself because this was his fault, so Claire hung around to the displeasure of Henry.

Henry is just like William in a lot of ways. First of all, he gets jealous easily and second of all, he's lonely. All of William's attention seemed to get taken away by Claire and this unborn baby, and he felt abandoned. Not to mention that William and this girl had to get married per traditional values of Claire's father which they both respected. The baby was due in July and Henry was graduating in May, leaving soon after that. William could only pick one or the other. And he chose his wife. It was a painful and bitter goodbye at the airport, and William had to watch his one friend leave, not sure if he'd ever see or hear from him again.

He saw him again after about three minutes.

Henry cancelled his flight last second because he couldn't make a huge mistake like this. They made plans for all three of them to fly to Utah and that summer they did.

As soon as Claire got to close her eyes in the bed within the Emily ranch house, the contractions started, and Michael John Edward Afton was born a few weeks early in that room. When William laid eyes on Michael for the first time, something changed. Nothing else mattered more than who was in his arms right now, he loved nothing more. Of course, William got huffy when they had to give Michael back to Claire.

William and Claire had an interesting relationship. They didn't love each other like a married couple would, they were very good friends if anything. They confided in each other, told each other their problems, but William was a gay man and Claire knew this, and had no issue with it. They loved each other as good friends, they weren't romantically or sexually inclined to the other, so they formed an agreement that she could do what she wanted, and he could do what he wanted. And it worked for a while.

Part 2 ->

#fnaf #william afton #claire afton #fnaf hurricane #michael afton #henry emily #i really like history #rabbits #fursona art

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