#Not to be insane actually like I really wish someone actually showing any interest in me didn't always revolt me to the point of nausea

[lucyskywalker]

I’m actually very curious to know why you don’t like jonsa! my reasons for example are: their fandom is acting way too insane for a ship that never happened and won’t ever happen; kit harington is unfortunately ugly. what are yours?

There are so many reasons that I dont even know how to begin with.

Alright. Let's go.

1st reason: It is only solely based on the show, and I really mean that. When you get to read metas and posts surrounding the ship, u realize these people never opened the books, while traying to pretend they did. I'm not being entitled. It is just obvious with what they write. Everything is taken out of contest. Especially surrounding Jon's pov and his lack of relationship with Sansa.

+ I despise the show. The only good thing about D&D's creations were the Dragons CGI and the dothraki and valyrian language, and it ends there. Out of it, everything sucks. They have rewrote all the female character in such a sexist and ridiculous way that I can't even start explaining for you.

2nd. I ship jonrya. Ik it is not everyone's cup of tea, but I do. And no. Idc if they become canon or not. I like the concept. I love their relationship. And I love what they can become. Now why the fact I ship Jonrya actually matters? Well, specially after season 7, a lot of Jonsa fans started taking things from Jon PIV that were about his love for Arya, and make it be about Sansa, with ridiculous excuses for their takes. The most commun and easy example being "What do you know of my heart, priestess? What do you know of my sister?" When Jon asks Melissandre, he is referring to Arya. And no. It is not a different interpretation. It is about Arya he is talking about. Another one was "Would you bed your sister?" And Again Jon thinks about Arya, but when you read Jonsa's metas; they say he is thinking about Sansa. Another common Jonsa take is that Jon died for his men in the books, or for Sansa, when again, this is not the case. He died for Arya. And that is explicit on the text with no room for other interpretation. No wonder why the last thing he tought was about her.

Jonsas straigh up lie about what happens in the books to support their takes, or they just read metas here on tumblr and believe it. Idk and neither do I wish to know.

Not only that. They started behaving as they had a moral high ground over jonerys and jonryas... when they don't, it is still incestuos and still problematic to modern standards - not only that, they behave entitled to this day, and attack Jonrya shippers and Jonerys shippers in a real coward way.

Many, many times, I received anon hate telling me to *kms*, slit my wrists. Someone even wished for me to get raped over a fictional ship.

My disdain over the ship is not only with the ship itself, hence taking a lot of Jon's dynamic and bound with Arya to give it to Sansa, which is really important in both of their stories and arc, but mostly about the fandom, and how I was affected by it. If it was treated only like a crackship (what book wise, actually is), as my beloved hitsukarin from bleach, I would have no problem with it.

But the community is far one of the most toxic ones I have ever seen or been in contact with. Actually, dealing with them heavily impacted my mental health.

3rd. I really didnt like Sansa way before dealing with the fandom. Since my favorite is Arya, the way Sansa treated her never vibed with me. (And no. It isn't normal sibling behavior. I am an older sister. I would never do half of the things Sansa have done, not even on 11). After book 1, I felt pity for her, but she still was the last interesting character for me, even if her Vale story was.... I guess, more berable.

After getting into the fandom, tho, Jonsas and Stansas ruined Sansa for me in every possible way as well to the point I read her chapters and I won't feel any kind of enjoyment in her journey or her character. She is my least liked character, not because "she is the most horrible person in the books" (she is not. She is far from being that. ) but because her fans made me feel terribly bitter about her. It is not logical or fair, but again, I'm not trying to be.

[trannakinskywalker]

.

[sailorblossoms-rankane]

We know Ranma falls first and hard, so what about Akane? When does it start? unlike Ranma, I think it's a couple of things adding up in the background... and why wouldn't it start... here? walk with me

Doctor Tofu is kind to Akane, but I'd say the main reason she had a crush on him was: he was the one male figure outside of her family who made her feel safe. Taking care of her injuries would feel like a form of protection, and Akane wants to feel protected.

It's not just that Akane shows her fiery personality in fights... I recently noticed that while other fighters can show themselves cool and confident in the face of danger (like Ranma). But with Akane, she fights as if she never feels safe in a fight, you can see it. Even when she's the strongest and is winning every morning...

Winning every day could have made her approach these guys looking more "confident" or "relaxed," but she's never relaxed. She always sends Kuno flying, but notice how there's an air of uneasiness (even if she sees him as a buffoon) that doesn't disappear until Ranma comes into the picture.

Ranma showing up as a girl helps Akane relax and reach out as she's too used to being harassed by guys (so she keeps her distance). But even if she finds out his secret in the worst way, she doesn't beat his ass until he's picking on her.

Akane is the one offering the friendly match (connection) but Ranma is also doing something likely no one has ever done with her before: he's being soft, maybe even tender, with her... making her relax. he's making her feel safe (Ranma doesn't fight any other girl like this)

The bathroom incident makes her feel afraid, but when boy Ranma shows himself again, it's clear by the way she stops any attempt of violence to study him (and argue childishly) that the fear is gone. She's tested in the worst way (a way that plays into her worst fears about men, which is hard to shake)... but this tells you she still feels safe, even if she doesn't realize it.

If someone like Kuno had made fun of her proportions, Akane would've beaten him up and moved on. The fact that she's still thinking about it long after the fact tells you he's already stirring something (it's even connected with Ranma thinking about her because he too is also feeling something)

Part of Ranma "falling first" is that he sees her best very straightforwardly from the get-go (and is confused after). With Akane, she isn't even sure of what she's seeing, she's still dealing with her complicated feelings connected to the doc and constant harassment... but she's already interested.

It's obvious that Akane lives rent-free 24/7 in Ranma's head from the moment he meets her, but Akane is not exactly unaffected. It isn't accurate to say he only annoys her at this stage. She pays attention, confides with him, worries, goes after/covers for him... that's interest

You need to pull a rope from both ends to create tension.

Romantic tension requires both parties to feel something, and they already have plenty when Akane tries to help Ranma, and he is protecting her during the fight against Ryoga. Even if she still hasn't sorted out her old crush...

Akane wishes for and values normalcy (she actually has a life) but she only feels normal when compared to the clowns that arrive after Ranma. It's clear by the way her classmates see her that she's an extraordinary girl...

She loves martial arts, but doesn't have the sort of ambitions the insane fighters around Ranma have. She sees it more as a fun outlet, comparable to having a favorite sport. She only holds on to power when someone pisses her off (spite lol) but always chooses normalcy over it

Ranma brings both craziness and safety into her life. You can really see that with Kuno and the guys challenging her: Akane is comfortable supporting Ranma as he navigates the craziness around him, but she isn't comfortable when SHE is at the center of it

Ranma either stands by her side during the madness or straight-up redirects the focus on him (starting from the moment Kuno throws that rose to Akane and Ranma is immediately by her side, ending taking the challenge against Kuno himself). Akane might complain about Ranma "fighting her fights" here, but she quickly gives in to his protection (unless someone is pissing her off... spite, she's just like me fr etc)

In true gag fashion, when Ranma picks on her for her attention, he’s both giving her an outlet and making fighting, which she connected to danger and harassment, a very safe and childish thing. It allows her to relax in a way she hasn’t before he meets him.

When Ranma complimenting her smiles gets to her to the point she's still thinking about it hours after, or that Ranma essentially saying he likes her better as her true self makes her genuinely happy... it doesn't come out of nowhere. She's already been feeling something for him

[lyneira]

♤ the crown prince and his wife-to-be ♤

-> headcanons of your relationship with Malleus as his betrothed

malleus x fem!reader

♤ the crown prince and his wife-to-be part II: your first time with him ♤ (NSFW) coming soon!

Ever since your betrothal to one another when you two were young, you and Malleus have written letters to each other (per Briar Valley courting tradition). After many long years of writing, it wouldn't be until recently that you'd finally be able to meet each other again, and it would be at NRC (where you’d be attending as well).

While he was so excited for your arrival, I think it starts off a bit awkward between the two of you despite having sent years and years’ worth of letters. Yes, he was ready to show you the many things that he’d spoken of in them, from the beautifully sculpted gargoyles around the school, to the lovely garden they have, and to some interesting spots he’s discovered, but when you finally stood in front of him, he froze and his heart was about to leap from his chest. You looked just as beautiful as your soul that had always shone through your writing.

He’d still try to act composed, but inside, he’s freaking out. He would just also be insanely nervous that you’re finally physically here with him. Thankfully, you’re kind and patient with him and the moment you mention gargoyles, his nervousness goes away, gets replaced by passion and adrenaline, and he confirms that indeed, this really was the girl he’s admired and wrote to for so long.

You would sneak off with Malleus to go on nightly walks and explore some ruins, to the dismay of both Sebek and Silver as well as your own retainers.

He'd appreciate that you wear the necklace he gifted you, so he'd also wear something you had gifted him. If neither of you could wear the marriage ring just yet, then at least something like this would do. It's a sign that you're his and he's yours.

Aside from you two, I think many would make it a point to avoid you for fear of being struck down by the powerful fae that is to be your husband if he ever saw them approach you. Sure, Malleus would probably give those who seemed to get too close to you a small, disapproving cold stare, but he would do no such thing as striking them down (not unless they hurt you). Therefore, you would still end up being isolated sometimes as well. Malleus would notice this and apologize to you for being the reason most are scared of approaching you. You would have to assure him that he has no need to apologize. If that’s the way it was going to be, then so be it. Yet, this wouldn’t stop you from trying to change it nevertheless.

You’d still receive invitations from the school or other students, and while Malleus is happy for you, he’d be inwardly sulking at the same time. You could be reading the invitation letter, and Malleus would take a peek from behind you and would scoff, “Hoh, they dare invite my wife-to-be without inviting her husband as well? How cheeky” Now Malleus would never force you to stay with him if he wasn't invited, but man would it be hard to still attend as you look at his sad face when you’re about to walk out the door. (Don’t leave this man alone pls)

You wished others could see how kind and sweet your fiance actually is, so you’d take it upon yourself to bring him to the places/events you’ve been invited to. Though he might be awkward trying to socialize, especially as he receives stares, you’d gently help him ease into it and ensure that he's included in the conversation. He’d appreciate you for taking the effort to help people come to like him, or rather, truly get to know him. And so it made him overjoyed that someone like you was going to be his wife. He couldn’t be any more grateful.

Malleus would be akin to a lost puppy following you around the way he always sticks to your side as much as possible. Wherever you are, there he wants to be. He’ll give you space whenever you need it and he knows he can’t be with you 24/7 of course, but he’ll always have his mind on you even when you’re away. If you’re gone for too long, he’d start becoming antsy, always wondering when you’ll be back. Yeah, you two were able to handle the distance over many years of writing to each other, but now that he has you in his presence so often, he doesn’t want to let you go. If he can’t do anything to see you sooner, he’d simply have things you’ve given him or some of your belongings around him to help content him for the time-being. Like, if you gave him a plushie, then you’d best believe that he’d be hugging it so tightly as he slept. Or did you leave him your handkerchief? It’s in his pocket right now. This dude is an absolute simp for you.

He loves it when you help him raise his dear tamagotchi, Roaring Drago. He'll mention how much he can't wait to have his own roaring dragos with you. He gets just as excited talking about a future with you as he does when talking about gargoyles lmao. He already begins planning names and such that you'd have to tell him to calm down a bit, especially when he mentions that he wants a big family (we’re talking about 3-5 kids). At the end of the day, he'll go with however many kids you'd like, but I was just thinking he’d want such a big family since y’know, he’s been lonely and isolated from others so having lots of people around would lift his spirits. (And what more would he want this many when the mother of his children would be you?) He’d imagine your little babies running around the castle, filling the great, long halls with joyous noise and laughter, something he didn't quite have when growing up. He’d imagine sitting by the fireplace with you and them, talking to them about gargoyles, how you two met long ago, or answering any of their silly questions when something confuses them. One might be sitting on his lap, one might be hanging on to his leg, one might even try to sit on his shoulders, holding on tight to his horns and ask him to stand up so they can feel as tall as him, and the other would be in your arms or lap as well. He absolutely could not wait for that future where he can be surrounded by those he dearly loves and adores.

a/n: I know, I know..! A lot of the hcs parallel my hcs in my ♡ how to gain the dragon’s affection ♡ one, but I think it was nice to elaborate on 'em a little further! Anyway, the next part of this is going to be an nsfw drabble of your first time with him, so minors pls do not intend to read that

[psychologicalwarclaire]

10 for Rise. Gimme warcrimes duo >:]

Donnie didn't realize just how much Witchtown hated him until he wound up in front of the majority of the town at Hidden City court.

Witches of all kinds shouted over each other, listing crimes that Donnie most definitely had NOT committed.

"--trampled my mushrooms!"

"--released the kraken into our town fountain!"

"--totally demolished my self esteem!"

"--ATE MY CAT!!!"

"-- and destroyed the statue of our great founder!"

Okay that one he actually had done. In his defense, he hadn't meant to blast it with his tech bo. Defense, however, was something he was missing.

He glanced over at the judge. "I don't know how Hidden City trials work but isn't there supposed to be someone on my side? I mean, ahem, with my superb knowledge of everything I could absolutely provide my own defense but, uhm..." I don't really want to do this all on my own, he finished in his head.

All of Donnie's knowledge of courtroom proceedings came from a show he and Raph used to watch together. Raph loved watching the good guys solve crimes and fight bad guys. Donnie loved the mysteries and collection of evidence. Neither of them found the legal stuff super interesting, so they'd discussed the real life logistics of the crime (whether Donnie could commit it, whether Raph could catch him, and how they'd avoid getting caught) during those scenes. Donnie wished he'd payed more attention.

The doors flew open with a BANG.

"PURPLE TURTLE!" Casey Jones yelled. "I AM HERE TO PROVE YOUR INNOCENCE!"

Donnie blinked.

The jury all looked at each other like she'd made a brilliant point, muttering and nodding along.

The judge stroked his beard. "Good entrance. One point to the defense."

There were very few times that Donnie didn't have at least SOME idea of what was happening. Now was, unfortunately, one of those times.

Casey seemed to appear right next to him. "SO! Got yourself in trouble with Witchtown, eh?"

Flustered, Donnie could only think to say, "I didn't do it! Their accusations are entirely--"

"HEY! That's MY job!" She cleared her throat. "As I was saying, Witchtown is tough, but I'm tougher! You're lucky I took this case, otherwise you would already be rotting in Hidden City prison."

"I-- Casey why are you a lawyer in the Hidden City?" Things were spiraling entirely out of control.

Casey grinned her insane grin. "I love yelling, fighting, arguing, squabbling, debating, etc. Passing the exam was super easy, too! The laws here aren't any more complicated than the Foot Clan laws. You know, normally I'm on the offensive. But I am Hamato Clan now! I WILL NOT BETRAY MY CLAN!"

Donnie couldn't help but be impressed. "Huh. What a strangely fitting career choice for you."

"INDEED! And the lawyer to politician pipeline is extremely fast. I shall build my way up to becoming a mayor, senator, and eventually I shall be the PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES! Junior has already signed on to be my vice president. Our slogan is either going to be: 'Jones and Jones: we'll feast on your bones' OR 'Vote Jones squared and your lives will be spared'. Catchy right?"

Donnie's mind was already buzzing with how his Genius Built brand could be expanded by personally knowing the president. "Casey," he said, putting a hand on her shoulder, "I will personally help fund your presidential campaign."

"Excellent! Now, we are in the middle of court so we can discuss that later."

"Oh yeah." Donnie had actually forgotten that he was literally on trial. Casey has the effect of being extremely distracting. "I need to tell you my alibi and--"

"Pffft, no need. What kind of court do you think this is?" Casey cracked her neck, and stretched her arms above her head.

The judge banged his gavel, which sent a shockwave across the room. The ground rumbled and the seats all slid back to open up a wide space in front of the stand. "We are now in session. Let prosecutor Gilby Gilbert of Witchtown and defendant Casey Jones of the Hamato Clan enter the ring."

The what?!

Gilby Gilbert, whom Donnie vaguely recognized from the Witchtown episode leapt into the ring. "That turtle is GUILTY!"

With a running leap, Casey Jones flipped into the ring and kicked him squarely in the chest. "Mr Hamato is more innocent than you and your corrupted, black market, embezzling town will ever be!"

The jury gasped.

"Flair, solid hit, AND a plot twist! Three more points to the defense!" the judge ruled.

Donnie was now very glad he had not been the one to plead (punch?) his own case.

"Turtle boy is against everything we stand for!" Gilby choked from inside a headlock.

"Since your treasury records show illegal trade with criminals AND many Witchtown officials who have been pocketing those funds, I'd say it's a good thing that Mr Hamato stands against you, you LOWLIFE!" Casey released the headlock, only to kick her opponent to the ground and curb stomp him.

Donnie was no longer worried.

In fact, as he watched Casey continue to kick Gilby (who had curled into a ball), he actually smiled. Perhaps the answer to science vs magic was brute force.

He had decided that when this trial was over and he and Casey had officially won, he was going to make her a fashionable Genius Built lawyer suit. He'd make it easily torn away to give her more points in style.

It was the least he could do.

[misc-obeyme]

Hello! :D

I simply can't stop thinking about Barbatos being insanely attracted and so deeply in love with MC that he don't make the effort to hide it anymore, but the problem is: MC doesn't actually think that he feels that way.

(I'm using female pronouns for better explanation, pardon my english 😔🫶)

Like, MC lives with many ancient and immortal beings who have lived for many many centuries and she is only a human who lived for a few years. In mc's conception, she doesn't see a reason why any of them would be attracted to mc in any way, so she just lives peacefully with them, not really expecting any romantic approach.

Mc and barbatos have a friendship, and mc is attracted to Barbatos (who isn't really?), but doesn't do anything about it. Kinda like the attraction you feel towards your favorite idol, you don't really make a move, but you wish you could get married.

Barbatos notices and kinda feels the same way, sending discreet signals when they were together. He finds it strange, because he sees her obvious interest in him, but doesn't do anything about it.

As time passes, Barbs feelings grow stronger and he grows frustrated and is determined to show MC his interest, his discreet moves now are obvious (only when they were alone bc its barb, cmon). When mc is talking he is just staring at her with such lovestruck eyes, blinking slowly and repliying to her in a flirty way. Mc only grows more and more flustered, not making any moves still.

It gets worse in a degree that once barbatos corners her against a wall and stares deeply at her soul, saying something bluntly urging her to do something since he knew she wasnt oblivious to the situation. Maybe in a teasing way, maybe serious.

I dont know if my ideas came out clear and I honestly think I'm a little lightheaded bc of anti-allergy meds, but this plot has been haunting my mind and I had to tell someone. Stay safe!! 🫶🫶🫶

Hi there, anon! While I'm a little concerned about medications making you lightheaded (like omg please rest and I hope you feel better soon!), I do think I understand what you're trying to say!

Because ahhh Barbatos he's so reserved. When I wrote my long fic, there's kind of a theme where the MC character doesn't believe that Barbatos returns their feelings. It's the cause of much angst and anguish, especially in the later chapters.

I think this is because Barbatos doesn't really express his feelings all that much. He's always calm and collected. He doesn't really get worked up about much of anything. Even when he's mad, it's like hidden behind a smile. The only time we really see him get truly angry is with Solomon in Nightbringer. (I mean there may have been other times but that's the only time I can remember.)

Anyway, I love the idea that he finally picks up on MC's feelings and realizes he has to start being more expressive with his own feelings. I kinda think he might realize that he only has so much time with MC, assuming they're still mortal. Like he's gonna hafta do something because time is short!

I personally am very fond of Barb being a tease, so I like the idea of him kinda teasing MC about it at first. But eventually he's going to get serious. If he thought MC really didn't understand how he feels and wasn't picking up on his teasing and maybe couldn't respond for some reason, he would choose to get serious and direct with them.

So yes, I think this is a delightful scenario and I am always rooting for Barbatos to confess his true love to MC lol!

[alastair-1205]

EPISODE 20 REACTIONS FUCKING FINALLY I think I hurt my wrist typing all this ngl. Holy fuck this show-

I am very scared :D 

At least they can still kick ass 

Cinder just cannot stop beating up Euphrasia damn

Stick!

OK SO LOOSING POWERS DOES HAVE AN EFFECT ON YOU THEN 

Im not normal about elemental powers 

Oh no Robie don’t get murdered-

He has the right idea tho with the cup thing

Zane is trying his fucking best rn lol 

Arin is not having any of it 

Oh shit yea they don’t know…all of that other stuff yet huh

THEYRE BACK NICE

Wdym captured by them?? Wtf happened to those two

Cinder is going to kill someone I stg 

LMAO respect where it’s due, that was funny

Robie îs only partially getting kidnapped don’t worry

FUCK YEA FRACK THIS IS WHY I LOVE YOU

I love Nook’s voice as well

FUCK YEA JORDY WIN BACK UR BRAIN

Oh that’s not good 

HELL YEA ARIN 

He’s gonna almost die isn’t he

LMAOOOOOOOOO 

Oh ow rip Robie 

Holy shit that’s actually insane 

OH GOD HE FELL ENTIERLY OFF THE EDGE JESUS 

Oh god they’re all fucked up

JORDY!

Hey the car’s back! AND SO IS JORDANA

OH GODDDDD

OH FUUUUUCK 

RAS AND ARIN MAKE ME INSANE THEY’RE BOTH SO COMPLEX HOLY FUCKKKK

At least most of them are out of it

Bro Robie is making friends with some rocks right now 

BADASS FIGHT IS BADASS

“Not from you” DAMN

OH. OH LLOYD KNOWS. HE KNOWS AND HE KNOWS HE CANT FIGHT IT OH GOD IM GONNA CRY 

ROBIES ALIVE 

I FUCKING LOVE HER SO MUCH 

I LOVE HOW HE WASNT EVEN BOTHERED JUST CONFUSED LMAO 

They’re actually adorable. Like I low-key didn’t want her to get a bf but this is so cute good for them 

But uh, y’all kinda have shit to do first-

Zdmn she almost got decapitated 

OH DAMN THIS IS PERSONAL

Bold choices Arin

KAI AND BONZEL 

Nil kinda wish he stayed in super hell longer but it’s ok 

CUZ THAT WAS A FUCKING ENTRANCE 

Oh hes pisssedddddd

They are such a dynamic duo omg that was iconic 

FUCK YEA ROBIE 

GET IT GEO 

LMAO that was personal for Euphrasia. Good for her 

LMAO HES JUST GETTING FUCKING DRAGGED HELP

BOLD CHOICES ARIN I STG 

Oh that scream :(((((

Oh fuuuuuck Arin made his choice 

Group hug :D That Lloyd isn’t in cuz he’s having a moment D:

BONZEL AND COLE :D

I’m just gonna assume he somehow knew she wasn’t dead ig? 

Wu being cryptic as always. We don’t even know if hes dead or not 

LMAO CINDER IN JAIL GET FUCKED

Yay for Sora but she is Not having a good time rn huh

Damn I wonder where Jordy went 

Lloyd and Sora man…..

That is a very good question Sora

THEYRE HOLDING HANDSSSSS

Kai should give this kid a shovel talk. I think it’d be funny 

GEO FRACK AND BONZEL AND FROCHICKY YAY

THEYRE GONNA TRACK DOWN JAY

Damn so they could be literally anywhere. They gotta track down Jay Arin and Pixal. At least Zane might get some time to look now

Dragon lady’s back 

I’m glad she’s not being a dick to him like Egalt would have been lol 

Oooooo Dragon favor 

Oh that’s an interesting thing for him to have 

I like how Arin’s reasonings are worded. Like he clearly still doesn’t exactly like Ras, he just needs him for his own thing. I really like that as opposed to Arin fully believing in what he’s doing cuz Arin just wouldn’t 

[kiefbowl]

how do i get over a guy who chose someone else over me, after telling me i was the only woman he could even think about? i know rationally that it's insane to be hung up on someone who clearly is not interested and also lied to me, but im unfortunately a certified yearner and have a very hard time letting go in situations like this. hoping for some practical advice to get my head to stop lingering in places where it's not loved in return

First step, stop calling yourself insane. Stop being self-deprecating. Stop expecting yourself to not be human. You're trying to shame yourself out of having feelings, just any feelings. I can tell by the way you've typed this you feel deeply embarrassed to have uncomfortable feelings, and you're anxious about how other people perceive you when you show those feelings. Can't do that, because those feelings have to be felt and there is NO REASON to be ashamed about having completely expectant feelings, and when you don't let yourself feel things, you do weird shit later.

Second step, get out of the house with other people. Or, go to other people's houses. OR, stay home but invite people over. The point is you have to start getting distracted instead of spending only your time being introspective to try to unfeel feelings. Go to the movies and feel your feelings there. Go to brunch and feel your feelings there. Go to the park and play frisbee golf and feel your feelings there. Your brain will be actively working on other thoughts while your body can feel your feelings, and it's like multi-tasking.

Third step, talk about your feelings. Just tell your friends what you're going through, tell them how you've been feeling. It can be scary, but I'll give you some jump offs:

"It makes me nervous to admit this, but I've actually been feeling a little obsessed over [blah blah]. I feel like I think about him constantly, because he really hurt me. I wish I didn't think about him this much. I really need help."

or you can try this

"What did you guys think of [blah blah]? I don't know if you guys have noticed but I'm actually pretty sad about what happened between us. I've been keeping it to myself but I'd like to talk about it."

or you can try this

"I'll be honest, I feel like I'm really hung up on [blah blah]. It would really help me to get some of my feelings out right now, but then after that I would appreciate it if we didn't talk about him much."

This is all to say: You are a normal person who is experiencing heartbreak. You are not a "certified yearner," that is something you made up for yourself because you feel shame. You don't need to feel shame! Yearning, heartbreak, love, and feelings are all normal and everyone around you experiences these things. Your feelings do not dictate your actions, and it's your actions that are the judge of you. But if you don't let yourself feel your feelings and find that pride within yourself, your feelings can become extreme and difficult to manage. So give yourself a break and allow yourself to be heartbroken! Why would you be immune, you're just as human as everyone else. Give yourself a break.

Secret fourth step: pursue pleasure

[blasphemous-lies-and-deceit]

for the "hand(s) on/at..." prompt – 16 and gerrymichael (just because i think michael would go insane for that)

And @moonisthedoor - if you're still taking prompts, "hand(s) on..." – 16. wrists, for any Gerry ship you'd like!

Michael wondered how he got himself into situations like this.

He thought he was just having a casual conversation, a chat with a stranger in a crowd about accessories and hair care. The bar was crowded and loud, Gerry was off somewhere doing something, and his drink was sweet and fruity and maybe had more alcohol in it than he was expecting. So it took him longer than usual to realize that the person he was chatting with was pretty obviously flirting with him and he completely hadn't noticed.

The bar was too queer-friendly for him to assume his conversation partner's gender. They were dressed femininely, but then again, so was he, in his favorite lacy skirt and dangly earrings. Whatever their gender and orientation, they were obviously interested in him, and he was obviously...not. For many reasons. But mainly because he was deeply in love with someone else. Who he really wished would come bail him out now.

"Where did you find that skirt?" they murmured to him, heavily lined eyes narrow and heavy. "I never have any luck shopping online." Their hand reached out as if to feel the fabric, or perhaps pet his thigh. Michael quickly pivoted so they missed, wishing he could run away entirely.

"Charity shops are your best bet," he suggested, straining up on his toes to better see over the crowd. Where was his lovely yet aggressive partner? They said they'd meet up back at the bar, but that was ages ago, where the fuck was he? "This was actually two skirts, I ripped the waist out of one and put them together to make it longer."

"Really? That's so interesting." They were stepping closer, thwarting his attempt to put some distance between them. Michael was running out of space to retreat, and was just wondering if it was time to bail without his boyfriend when a body inserted itself between them, pressing back into him with warm familiarity.

"Hey," Gerry greeted the other person, his voice bright and pleasantly threatening. "How's your night going?"

"Umm," they balked, caught off guard. Michael smiled and wrapped his arms around Gerry's middle, hugging him gratefully from behind. Gerry's hands found his, latching onto his wrists to lock him in place. The stranger's eyes flicked down to their hands, then back to Gerry's face. "Not...bad?"

"Good." Gerry smiled like a shark. "Let's keep it that way, yeah?" His hands squeezed, tightening on Michael's wrists, and Michael felt a pleasant rush down his spine at the possessive gesture. Not that he would have been so easily tempted away, and he knew Gerry knew that too, but it was nice to feel so claimed. To know that Gerry loved him enough to fight for him, even if it never came to blows.

Michael backed away, dragging Gerry with him into grateful retreat. "Thank god you showed up," he hissed as Gerry twisted out of his arms, keeping ahold of his wrists as he pulled him towards the door. "We were just talking, and then they were flirting, but I just wanted to talk about clothes and stuff!" His words were a bit rushed, his steps stumbling as he tried to keep up with his boyfriend. "That fucking sucked."

"Yeah, I could tell." Gerry backed through the exterior door into the night, a cool relief after the close warm air of the bar. "Good thing I came along to swoop in and rescue you. Save you from being flirted with." His grin was wide and ridiculous, and Michael smiled with him, full of glee now that they were out. He twisted his hands in Gerry's hold, reversing the grip so that he was the one holding onto Gerry's wrists. Using his height to his advantage, Michael pushed Gerry up against the nearest brick wall, looming over him and holding him in place.

"Oh yes, you're my big tough boyfriend, aren't you? So demanding and possessive," he exaggerated, and was rewarded by an even wider and excited grin. Michael knew Gerry loved this. He pinned his wrists to the wall and pressed in, chest to chest, and watched the pupils of his eyes grow wide. He knew Gerry loved his too. Leaning in, Michael ducked his head to run his lips along Gerry's neck, raising shivers in his wake. "However should I thank you?"

Gerry let out a staggered moan, trembling in his grip and filling Michael with a delightful sensation. "However you want," he gasped, any pretense of being an overbearing partner flying away as Michael kissed his neck. "Fuck, Michael-"

"Hmm, yes," Michael agreed, squeezing his wrists appreciatively. "I think that would do nicely."

[nyxshadowhawk]

The Red Book, Liber Primus Part Three

Previous section: https://nyxshadowhawk.tumblr.com/post/740006966416588801/the-red-book-liber-primus-part-two

Picking right up where I left off...

The Splitting of the Spirit

So, now it’s time for Jung’s own Shadow work.

To journey into Hell is to become Hell itself.

Damn. You know, I’d never considered that before, but seeing it written out like this really helps it to sink in. Journey into Hell, and you take on its essence — you become monstrous.

[The desert] seems inhabited by magical beings who murderously attach themselves to me and daimonically change my form. I have evidently taken on a completely monstrous form in which I can no longer recognize myself. It seems to me that I have become a monstrous animal form for which I have exchanged my humanity.

I’m reminded of the concept of Beasthood in Bloodborne, in which drinking the blood of gods turns one into a beast that constantly craves more blood. It’s outright stated at multiple points in the game that the beast is part of man’s inherent nature, a “horrific and unwelcome instinct deep within the hearts of men.” I know exactly what it feels like to transform into this beast-possessed self in meditation, to temporarily suspend one’s humanity and become a savage thing. So, I understand what Jung is going through here.

What follows is a dialogue between Jung and his soul, in which he is indignant at the darkness and animality and stupidity of it all. It seems very backwards to Jung that he should be getting this instead of knowledge, truth, and light. The soul answers obtusely, frustrating him further. It insists that its way is still that of knowledge and light (because Shadow work is necessary for enlightenment), but Jung doesn’t understand this yet. Jung cries out that he has worshipped the soul like a god, but now it wears the face of a devil, of “eternal mediocrity” (showing that Jung associations devilishness/shadow with banality and mundaneness). Everything feels insane and pointless, and he doesn’t like it. It’s counterintuitive that this should be the path towards knowledge and enlightenment. He engages in civil war with himself.

It’s so wild to witness someone else’s Shadow work, and straight from the horse’s mouth. I’m watching him go through almost the exact same thing that I went through, but the things that trigger Jung are not the same things that trigger me. I have much less of an issue with the idea of banality or meaninglessness, and Jung doesn’t seem to have any of my issues around power or sex. Everyone’s Shadow looks different, but the process is always the same.

It’s also interesting to me that Jung’s soul basically becomes his Shadow in this scene — it “wears the mask of a devil, a frightful one” — but he still calls it the soul and not the Shadow. So, does that mean that the Shadow is an aspect of the soul? My own Shadow appears to me as a man, so does that mean that he’s actually my soul, but wearing a Shadowy face? He only wears that face some of the time, not all the time. He’s both my beast and my prince. That’s partly because my Shadow aspects all have to do with power, but it also hearkens back to the duality of sacrificer and sacrificed.

I felt myself transformed into a rapacious beast. My heart glowered in rage against the high and beloved, against my prince and hero, just as the nameless one of the people, driven by greed for murder, lunged at his dear prince. Because I carried the murder in me, I foresaw it. Because I carried the war in me, I foresaw it. I felt betrayed and lied to by my king. Why did I feel this way? He was not as I had wished him to be. He was other than I expected. He should be the king in my sense, not in his sense. He should be what I called ideal. My soul appeared to me hollow, tasteless and meaningless. But in reality what I thought of her was valid for my ideal.

People project onto their leaders. It can be hard for you to accept that your leaders are still people, that they are still flawed, and that they have Shadows of their own. Instead, you want the leader to fulfill your agendas and make the world in your image; to be king according to your idea of what a king is and what a king should do, instead of the king’s own. When the king inevitably demonstrates that he is, in fact, a unique person who has his own personality and agenda, the people feel betrayed and turn on him. Think of all the complaints about politicians not being who you thought they were when they get into office! During campaigns, they pander to the projections, and then their real self inevitably shows because they’re people and not ideas.

Because of all these projections, leaders tend to reflect the unconscious of the people they rule to some extent, especially if the leader is elected by those people. However, sometimes the leader ends up being the pure, concentrated Shadow of the society they rule. Whenever the Shadow goes unaddressed, it takes over, often in spectacular fashion. There’s an obvious example of one such leader in Jung’s time and place. There’s also an example of one such leader in my time and place. If a writer of dystopian fiction created a character that mixed together every bad stereotype of Americans into one person, then named that character after McDonalds and a word that means both “to overcome” and “fart,” I would tell them that they were being way too ham-fisted and writing a strawman instead of a person. Who the hell writes this shit?!

The Murder of the Hero

In a dream, Jung (helped by a colonial “savage” stereotype of a dark-skinned indigenous person) slays the hero Siegfried, who rides on a chariot of bone. Siegfried is blond and blue-eyed, representing all that is good and noble in Jung’s mind. (The footnotes say that Jung didn’t actually feel attached to Siegfried, but this was the image his mind latched on to.) Jung is so disturbed by this dream that he feels like he must take his own life if he does not figure out what it means. He feels better after the spirit of the depths says, “The highest truth is one and the same with the absurd.” I completely agree with that — often the most profound truths delivered by the divine are weird and nonsensical when understood using human logic. This is one of those things.

There is an illustration of this dream:

Jung sort of goes back and forth on what this dream means throughout The Red Book, but his eventual interpretation seems to be that the heroic ideal needs to die in order for one to confront the reality of the Shadow. Here’s his interpretation from Memories, Dreams, Reflections:

…suddenly the meaning of the dream dawned on me. "Why, that is the problem that is being played out in the world." Siegfried, I thought, represents what the Germans want to achieve, heroically to impose their will, have their own way. "Where there is a will there is a way!" I had wanted to do the same. But now that was no longer possible. The dream showed that the attitude embodied by Siegfried, the hero, no longer suited me. Therefore it had to be killed. After the deed I felt an overpowering compassion, as though I myself had been shot: a sign of my secret identity with Siegfried, as well as of the grief a man feels when he is forced to sacrifice his ideal and his conscious attitudes. This identity and my heroic idealism had to be abandoned, for there are higher things than the ego's will, and to these one must bow.

This isn’t what my interpretation of the hero’s death would be. My immediate thought was that heroes or kings always have to die as part of the alchemical process, because that represents ego death, and resurrection always follows. But it is significant that Jung himself is not the one who dies, he’s the one who shoots, accompanied by his Shadow. The idea of indigenous people as “savages” is full-on colonial racism, but it’s also a textbook example of Shadow-projection: Europeans assume that indigenous people are animalistic, barbaric, and violent, and then proceed to commit centuries’ worth of heinous atrocities against them. The Europeans attack the very thing they fear in themselves, and thus become it. So in a way, it’s… uh… progressive?… that Jung recognizes the “savage” symbol as an aspect of himself, identifying with it instead of projecting onto it.

Meanwhile, Siegfried represents everything that Jung perceives is good about himself:

Oh that Siegfried, blond and blue-eyed, the German hero, had to fall by my hand, the most loyal and courageous! He had everything in himself that I treasured as the greater and more beautiful; he was my power, my boldness, my pride. […] If I wanted to go on living, it could only be through trickery and cunning.

You can’t identify with the Shadow until you abandon the notion that you are purely good, beautiful, and noble. Now that Jung has destroyed the noble aspects of himself, he has to live ignobly, through trickery and cunning, i.e. as his Shadow.

The reason why it’s Siegfried in particular is because he represents idealized German-ness. Siegfried or Sigurd is a mythological hero from Germanic and Norse mythology, who slays the dragon Fafnir (and he is actually murdered in mythology, though not like this). Therefore, he’s someone to be admired and emulated. Plus, he’s blond. But, as Jung says in the next chapter, imitating the hero is not a good thing. In fact, it’s explicitly a bad thing, because imitating someone else prevents you from being yourself: “The hero must fall for the sake of our redemption, since he is the model and demands imitation. But the measure of imitation is fulfilled.” Beyond that, I think we can see something prophetic in the murder of Siegfried, the German ideal. If Jung interprets Siegfried as the Germans’ desire to “impose their will,” that is definitely not a heroic thing, and should be shot dead before it gets too far. Alternatively, one could say that the positive and flattering reputation of Germany is killed — I might have to brush up on my history, but if I remember correctly, Germany was on top of its game at the beginning of the twentieth century. Then Siegfried, the blond and blue-eyed German hero, is murdered. The ideal is dead. The world will see Germany’s Shadow. Boy will it ever.

Most of that interpretation is presented in the next chapter, though. In this chapter, Jung’s interpretation of Siegfried is as a projection of the divine:

…I had to kill my lord and God, not in single combat, since who among mortals could kill a God in a duel? You can reach your God only as an assassin, if you want to overcome him. But this is the bitterest for mortal men: our Gods want to be overcome, since they require renewal. If men kill their princes, they do so because they cannot kill their Gods, and because they do not know that they should kill their Gods in themselves.

I like this interpretation better, because it fits in with my general idea that spiritual death is required for rebirth and renewal. The idea that “our Gods want to be overcome” reminds me of Aly Seleem’s Bloodborne theory that the Great Ones want the player to kill them so they can ascend to a higher plane of existence. I’m still not sure if I completely agree with that theory, but this idea of killing God in oneself does make “Hunt the Great Ones. Hunt the Great Ones.” make more sense. Also interesting that God must be assassinated (boy, if only Bloodborne were that easy…) because there’s no other way to win against it — that reminds me of the Titans setting upon baby Zagreus while he’s distracted with toys.

The next section addresses alchemical inversion:

If the God grows old, he becomes shadow, nonsense, and he goes down. The greatest truth becomes the greatest lie, the brightest day becomes darkest night. As day requires night and night requires day, so meaning requires absurdity and absurdity requires meaning. Day does not exist through itself, night does not exist through itself. The reality that exists through itself is day and night. So the reality is meaning and absurdity. Noon is a moment, midnight is a moment, morning comes from night, evening turns into night, but everything comes from the day and morning turns into day.

Night and day are not separate things that exist by themselves. The reality is that both day and night exist and regularly turn into each other, so, they are one thing and not two things. The same is true of all other pairs of opposites. Each pair of opposites represents one thing, not two things.

Interestingly, Jung then makes a connection with Norse pagans:

Judge not! Think of the blond savage of the German forests, who had to betray the hammer-brandishing thunder to the pale Near-Eastern God who was nailed to the wood like a chicken marten. […] But their life force bade them to go on living, and they betrayed their beautiful and wild Gods, their holy trees and their awe of the German forests.

You know, I’ve always wondered, why did pagans abandon their gods for the sake of Christianity? I can understand the appeal of Christianity itself, especially early Christianity, but the mandate that only one god be worshipped seems intolerable to me now. I couldn’t imagine abandoning my gods for its sake. So why did they? It wasn’t all under duress. Sometimes the old gods were kept on as saints, and sometimes churches were built on the same holy sites, but it is not the same. As Jung said before, it lacks its madness. I appreciate that Jung can see that the old gods are beautiful and wild. They are. They still are.

After death on the cross, Christ went into the underworld and became Hell, so he took on the form of the Antichrist, the dragon.

Now this is interesting. This goes back to what Jung was saying before, “To journey into Hell is to become Hell itself.” If Christ journeyed into Hell, then he had to have become his hellish counterpart, the Antichrist. The idea of Christ and the Antichrist being one and the same being is utterly blasphemous by Christian standards, but it also seems really obvious. Of course Jesus would have a Shadow, and of course the thing literally called “Antichrist” would be it. I wonder why I’ve never considered that before.

Gods are unavoidable. The more you flee from the God, the more surely you fall into his hand.

Lol, this is certainly true in my experience.

I can understand Jung’s feelings of confusion and terror after having this murder dream. I actually had a dream like this, once. It’s the only dream I’ve ever had that possessed me with so much terror that it made me literally sit up in bed like in the movies, and like Jung, I had to process it before falling to sleep again (though thankfully it didn’t make me feel suicidal). In the dream, I was apprenticed to a wizard. There was another wizard whom my mother idolized as a spiritual teacher. My wizard told me to kill that other wizard, and while I usually trust my mother’s judgement, I obeyed my wizard and killed him (I don’t remember actually doing it, the dream cut to it having been done). My mother mourned his death. My wizard told me that we were not done, because the wizard’s hat and book still had evil magical power, and that I needed to destroy them. I felt a mounting sense of terror as I tried to acquire the hat and book, and it didn’t subside when I succeeded. My wizard told me to burn the hat and book, and to make the dead wizard’s familiars watch. That last bit was so sadistic that I bolted up in bed. Even after I woke, the terror still didn’t subside. Then I realized the truth: I had killed the wrong guy. My wizard was evil, the magic of the hat and book wasn’t dangerous, and my mother was right all along. Suddenly I felt completely at peace, and promptly went back to sleep. This remains the only truly Jungian dream I’ve ever had, and I still have no idea how to interpret it.

The Conception of the God

The ideas of this chapter are elaborated upon in Jung’s book Aion, in which he argues that the Age of Aquarius will bring the end of Christianity’s two-thousand-year-long spiritual supremacy in the Western world. That period of two millennia happens to coincide with the astrological age of Pisces, the sign of the fish, which is one of the earliest symbols of Christianity. In the coming astrological age, Jung argues, Christianity will begin (and arguably, has already begun) to lose its hold over the cultural consciousness, and the Shadows that it has repressed for so long will start to be addressed.

This chapter of The Red Book is about the conception of the new God of the coming astrological age. Jung says that this new God will be characterized by its synthesis of all dualities:

The divine child approached me out of the terrible ambiguity, the hateful-beautiful, the evil-good, the laughable-serious, the sick-healthy, the inhuman-human and the ungodly-godly. I understood that the God whom we seek in the absolute was not to be found in absolute beauty, goodness, seriousness, elevation, humanity or even in godliness. Once the God was there. I understood that the new god would be in the relative. If the God is absolute beauty and goodness, how should he encompass the fullness of life, which is beautiful and hateful, good and evil, laughable and serious, human and inhuman? How can man live in the womb of the God if the Godhead himself attends only to one-half of him?

This checks. It checks with everything I know about alchemy, in which the opposite principles of sulfur and mercury unite in the Chemical Wedding to produce a secret third thing, the Philosopher’s Stone, which is a perfect mix of both polarities. Jesus, as he is, is only one half of the equation. The new God is going to encompass both the light and the Shadow, the totality of existence and of the human soul. Haven’t I said this? I’m almost certain that I have said something to this effect in my answers before: Life is nuanced, so God is nuanced. The reason why I like my gods’ dark and terrifying sides is because they encompass the whole of life, with all of its aspects, and that this is more spiritually useful than focusing only on the good or light aspects of things. Dionysus in particular is a god that expresses and reconciles multiple dualities, like good/evil, above/below, male/female, life/death, divine/human. The Absolute must be all things, or it’s not the Absolute. To fixate only on the things that are light, good, and comfortable is insufficient.

Therefore after his death Christ had to journey to Hell, otherwise the ascent to Heaven would have become impossible for him. Christ first had to become his Antichrist, his underworldly brother. No one knows what happened during the three days Christ was in Hell. I have experienced it. The men of yore said that he had preached there to the deceased. What they say is true, but do you know how this happened? It was folly and monkey business, an atrocious Hell’s masquerade of the holiest mysteries.

I have to say, it’s pretty ballsy of Jung to say straight-up that he had the same harrowing experience as Jesus Christ and came out of it unscathed, but that’s also exactly what happened. He underwent the first part of the Great Work and descended into the Underworld, confronting and becoming his own Shadow, and finally rising to the surface again. This is a great and old Mystery, and one of the ones that I feel I’m familiar with. I’ve experienced it too.

Jung provides the reader with instructions for katabasis, which I’m once again going to transcribe in full:

If we do not have the depths, how do we have the heights? Yet you fear the depths, and do not want to confess that you are afraid of them. It is good, though, that you fear yourselves: say it out loud that you are afraid of yourselves. It is wisdom to fear oneself. Only the heroes say that they are fearless. But you know what happens to heroes. With fear and trembling, looking around yourselves with mistrust, go thus into the depths, but do not do this alone: two or more is greater security since the depths are full of murder. Also secure yourselves the way of retreat. Go cautiously as if you were cowards, so that you preempt the soul murderers. The depths would like to devour you whole and choke you in mud. He who journeys to Hell also becomes Hell; therefore do not forget from whence you come. The depths are stronger than us; so do not be heroes, be clever and drop the heroics, since nothing is more dangerous than to play the hero. The depths want to keep you; they have not returned very many up to now, and therefore men fled from the depths and attacked them. What if the depths, due to the assault, now change themselves into death? But the depths indeed have changed themselves into death; therefore when they awoke they inflicted a thousandfold death. We cannot slay death, as we have already taken all life from it. If we still want to overcome death, then we must enliven it. Therefore on your journey be sure to take golden cups full of the sweet drink of life, red wine, and give it to dead matter, so that it can win life back. The dead matter will change into black serpents. Do not be frightened, the serpents will immediately put out the sun of your days, and a night with wonderful will-o-the-wisps will come over you. Take pains to waken the dead. Dig deep mines and throw in sacrificial gifts, so that they reach the dead. Reflect in good heart upon evil, this is the way to the ascent. But before the ascent, everything is night and Hell. What do you think of the essence of Hell? Hell is when the depths come to you with all that you no longer are or are not yet capable of. Hell is when you can no longer attain what you could attain. Hell is when you must think and feel and do everything that you know you do not want. Hell is when you know that your having to is also a wanting to, and that you yourself are responsible for it. Hell is when you know that everything serious that you have planned with yourself is also laughable, that everything fine is also brutal, that everything good is also bad, that everything high is also low, and that everything pleasant is also shameful. But the deepest Hell is when you realize that Hell is also no Hell, but a cheerful Heaven, not a Heaven in itself, but in this respect a Heaven, and in that respect a Hell.

The Hero’s Journey is probably one of the most instantly-recognizable things to come out of Jungian psychology, but Jung kind of eviscerates the idea of the hero in The Red Book. If you try to be a hero — that is, if you try to match a particular ideal… well, you’ve seen what happens, haven’t you? The only way forward is to admit that you are not ideal, that you are dark and scary. You have no choice but to descend into your own Underworld and confront your own monsters. Bring a guide with you, and ensure you know the way out again, because the depths are hungry and they want to keep you — it’s not natural for souls to return from the Land of the Dead, so the Underworld will do everything it can to prevent you from leaving. The best thing is to be cautious and humble. Death itself cannot die (because it’s already dead, by definition), so the only way to overcome Death is to confront it with its opposite, which is life. When you get to the Underworld, the first thing you must do is reawaken dead matter with red wine (liquid life-force). The dead matter will turn into serpents that will blot out the sun. Sacrifice to the chthonic powers. Meditate upon evil.

That last bit in particular is counterintuitive, but it is the only way back up. That means allowing yourself to think, feel, do, and be everything that you normally want to disassociate from yourself. If you don’t want to be seen as evil, then you’ll be evil. If you don’t want to be seen as weak, then you’ll be weak. If you don’t want to be seen as foolish, then you’ll be foolish. And so on. You have to admit that you are responsible for every dark desire and evil impulse that you have had, that at least part of you actually does want to do evil things. Even if you feel compelled, even if you feel inclined to say “I did what I had to do” or some other half-assed justification, part of you does want to be evil. And that’s not some external force like demons or the Devil working on you, that is all you.

“Hell is when you know that everything serious that you have planned with yourself is also laughable, that everything fine is also brutal, that everything good is also bad, that everything high is also low, and that everything pleasant is also shameful.” This line once again addresses the general theme of inversion. In the Underworld, everything becomes its opposite, including everything about you — but all opposites are also the same thing. As above, so below. This line reminds me a lot of a similar, thematically-significant line from Macbeth: “Fair is foul and foul is fair.” The last inversion is that of Hell and Heaven itself, which brings to mind another very famous Early Modern English line, this time from Paradise Lost: “The mind is its own place, and in itself / can make a heav’n of Hell, a hell of Heav’n.”

The one arose from the melting together of the two. He was born as a child from my own human soul, which had conceived him with resistance like a virgin. Thus it corresponds to the image that the ancients have given to us.

Once again, a very alchemical image. Reminds me of this line from The Twelve Keys of Basil Valentine (I started doing an analysis of that ages ago, and I promise that I will get back to it): “But our Stone, as it has been bequeathed to me by the Ancients, is derived from two things, and one thing, in which is concealed a third thing.” The secred third thing is the Philosopher’s Stone, the Divine Child that unites all opposites and therefore becomes its own separate thing — neither red, nor blue, but purple.

Jung says how he worshipped his soul, believing her to be God, but he was actually worshipping the unborn God within the womb of the soul.

This section addresses the interpretation of the hero’s death as the death of an ideal:

The hero as we understand him has become an enemy of God, since the hero is perfection. The Gods envy the perfection of man, because perfection has no need of the Gods. But since no one is perfect, we need the Gods. The Gods love perfection because it is the total way of life. But the Gods are not with him who wishes to be perfect, because he is an imitation of perfection.

Again, really interesting that perfection is defined as a sort of opposite to divinity, instead of as divinity itself. Often, gods are defined as perfect beings, but here Jung places a sharp distinction between perfection and divinity. Here, perfection is defined as lacking any darkness, flaws, “incapacity,” or other Shadow traits. Gods are therefore not perfect, because gods are an even mix of conscious and Shadow traits. Perfection involves ignoring half of God. (This is probably why the Neoplatonic idea of gods as perfect beatific beings never really resonated for me.) Perfection is not only unattainable, it’s actually dangerous to try to achieve perfection. (A certain Dwarf in the Flask comes to mind.) The only thing one can really do is imitate it, and imitation amounts to nothing, because it makes you into a hollow facsimile of whatever you’re imitating, instead of self-actualized.

The new God laughs at imitation and discipleship. He needs no imitations and no pupils. He forces men through himself.

This God is no guru. He doesn’t instruct or preach. His worship is more experiential than theoretical. Worshipping him means being forced through oneself, forced to confront the internal world and the unconscious. You aren’t supposed to follow him, you’re supposed to follow yourself, and that’s a whole lot harder. About damn time.

The God must be within, not projected outside the self:

If we set a God outside of ourselves, he tears us loose from the self, since the God is more powerful than we are. Our self falls into privation. But if the God moves into the self, he snatches us from what it is outside us. We arrive at singleness in ourselves. So the God becomes communal in reference to what is outside us, but single in relation to us. No one has my God, but my God has everyone, including myself. The Gods of all individual men always have all other men, including myself. So it is always only the one God despite his multiplicity. You arrive at him yourself and only through your self seizing you. The hero must fall for the sake of our redemption, since he is the model and demands imitation. But the measure of imitation is fulfilled. We should become reconciled to solitude in ourselves and to the God outside of us. If we enter into this solitude then the life of the God begins. If we are in ourselves, then the space around us is free, but filled by the God.

I’m not sure I fully understand this, but here’s my take: If your fixation is on the external world, God will tear you away from yourself and you’ll fail at self-actualization. If God is within you, then you’ll be pulled inward, and you’ll have to do all the difficult work that Jung has been doing. As said before, God fills the empty space, so God is essentially a powerful vacuum that sucks you towards itself. The external God is communal, but the internal God is personal: Each individual person has their own conception of God within themselves, so God appears different to all of the different people. Your idea of God is completely unique to you. But from God’s perspective, all of these different unique Gods are still versions of itself. Therefore God is both one and many. (I would argue that God can be subdivided into many individual divinities within a person, but the point is that all people’s interpretations are different while also all amounting to the same thing.)

Your desire is the father of the God, your self is the mother of the God, but the son is the new God, your master. If you embrace your self, then it will appear to you as if the world has become cold and empty. The coming God moves into this emptiness. If you are in your solitude, and all the space around you has become cold and unending, then you have moved far from men, and at the same time you have come near to them as never before. Selfish desire only apparently led you to men, but in reality it led you away from them and in the end to yourself, which to you and to others was the most remote. But now you are in solitude, your God leads you to the God of others, and through hat to the true neighbor, to the neighbor of yourself in others. If you are in yourself, you become aware of your incapacity. You will see how little capable you are of imitating the heroes and of being a hero yourself. So you will also no longer force others to become heroes.

Spiritual work of this type is inherently isolating, which is why so many who attempt it are monks or suchlike that already isolate themselves for spiritual purposes. Speaking from experience, it is very difficult to engage with the external world when so much of me is floating around up in the astral realm. (The Internet is such a blessing in that sense, because it is a midway between the physical and non-physical worlds — it is wholly in the airy intellectual realm, but almost everyone on it is a real person who exists somewhere, so I’m still engaged with actual human beings.) The external world could also seem “cold” in comparison because the external goals you may have been chasing may seem like they no longer matter, like you’re living in the Matrix. Being drawn into yourself involves becoming acutely self-aware, but the advantage of self-awareness is that it will prevent you from projecting (either heroes or Shadows) onto other people, which will help you to see them as they really are. And that promotes empathy, which brings you closer to other people, and so on.

I’m really interested in what Jung would have thought of the Hero’s Journey concept…

Mysterium Encounter

So, Jung has successfully completed his journey to the Underworld. Now what? The next three sections concern a series of visions in which Jung meets an old man, Elijah, and a young woman, Salome, in a dark house with pillars and a bright garden. There’s also a black snake. Jung recounts his dialogues with these spirits in the form of a mystery play.

Elijah says that Salome is his daughter, and the source of his wisdom, and that is why she is blind. Jung is utterly disturbed by this. He cannot reconcile that Salome, the woman who requested that John the Baptist’s head be delivered to her on a platter, could be the daughter of a holy prophet. She asks him if he loves her, and Jung says, “I dread you, you beast.” In response, she asks him, “And what wouldn’t you give for a single look into the infinite unfolding of what is to come? Are these not worth a sin for you?” This is interesting to me, because it seems to suggest that sin is preferable, or even necessary, as part of the experience of acquiring divine knowledge. Honestly, that makes sense — mysticism and occultism tend to be transgressive in many ways, especially when they push against established religious doctrine. Jung’s reaction to Salome sort of reminds me of my reaction to the nightmare woman, except that Salome is not at all threatening to Jung. At least, not from my perspective. He seems to think she’s a wicked temptress. The Spirit of the Depths insists that Salome is divine, and Salome insists that Jung must love her.

Elijah and Salome’s partnership force Jung to question just about everything he knows about spirituality. The idea of the “bloodthirsty horror” being the daughter of the prophet, that they are in fact one being, is too much for Jung to bear. And yet, that falls right in line with the recurring theme of the union of opposites. Here are two extreme opposites, that Jung is being told are the same being. How’s he going to accept that? Hearing all this, he assumes he’s still in the Underworld. But he’s not.

After the dialogue is an interjection that insists to the reader that this is Jung’s own mystery, and that it does not apply to anyone else: “This play that I witnessed is my play, not your play. It is my secret, not yours. You cannot imitate me. My secret remains virginal and my mysteries are inviolable, they belong to me and cannot belong to you. You have your own.” Again, I feel validated and almost relieved to see this here, because it means that Jung isn’t trying to apply his personal experience on a universal scale. He recognizes that it applies only to himself. Go get your own mysteries!

He who enters into his own must grope through what lies at hand, he must sense his way from stone to stone. He must embrace the worthless and the worthy with the same love. A mountain is nothing, and a grain of sand holds kingdoms, or also nothing. Judgement must fall from you, even taste, but above all pride, even when it is based on merit. Utterly poor, miserable, unknowingly humiliated, go on through the gate. Turn your anger against yourself, since only you stop yourself from looking and from living. The mystery play is soft like air and thin smoke, and you are raw matter that is disturbingly heavy. But let your hope, which is your highest good and highest ability, lead the way and serve you as a guide in the world of darkness, since it is of like substance with the forms of that world.

This stream-of-consciousness mystical advice reads like instructions to initiates who dare to go through a similar experience to find their own mystery plays. I experience a lot of mystery dialogues in my free time, while I’m meditating by pacing back and forth, in this astral space where everything is volatile (in the alchemical sense) and I all but lose track of my heavy matter. Once again, one must accept what comes without judgement, especially if it involves seemingly-irreconcilable opposites. The line about hope reminds me of The Sandman, in which Hope is the form that Dream uses to win The Oldest Game. It wins because even Hope has power in Hell, and can’t be snuffed out.

There’s an illustration of Elijah and Salome, in front of their pillared house. Elijah wears blue and Salome wears red. The black snake is at their feet. The figure representing Jung is once again a dark-skinned man in white, with shoulder-length black hair. Decorating the border is blue light on the left side, and red tendrils on the right side that coil around the beams of light. I think it’s safe to assume that the light represents Elijah and the tentacles represent Salome.

The scene of the mystery play is a deep place like the crater of a volcano. My deep interior is a volcano, that pushes out the fiery-molten mass of the unformed and the undifferentiated. Thus my interior gives birth to the children of chaos, of the primordial mother. He who enters the crater also becomes chaotic matter, he melts. The formed in him dissolves and binds itself anew with the children of chaos, the powers of darkness, the ruling and the seducing, the compelling and the alluring, the divine and the devilish. These powers stretch beyond my certainties and limits on all sides, and connect me with all forms and with all distant beings and things, through which inner tidings of their being and their character develop in me. Because I have fallen into the source of chaos, into the primordial beginning, I myself become smelted anew in the connection with the primordial beginning, which at the same time is what has been and what is becoming. At first I come to the primordial beginning in myself. But because I am a part of the matter and formation of the world, I also come into the primordial beginning of the world in the first place. I have certainly participated in life as someone formed and determined, but only through my formed and determined consciousness and through this in a formed and determined piece of the whole world, but not in the unformed and undetermined aspects of the world that likewise are given to me. Yet it is given only to my depths, not to my surface, which is formed and determined consciousness.

This is a powerful image. Because mystical visions are predicated on madness to some extent, they are a raw outpouring of pure chthonic material, primordial Khaos at its finest. Engaging with it requires alchemical dissolution or ego death. Everything that is “formed” (i.e. fixed) in you dissolves or “melts” into the prima materia, and is reformed, having been infused with underworldly divine power. This is more or less participation in the primordial process of creation itself. Consciousness interacts only with the “formed and determined,” i.e. fixed, aspects of existence. So, you need your depths to engage with the unformed and undetermined, i.e. volatile, aspects of existence.

Most of the rest of this chapter is an analysis of what Elijah and Salome represent, even though Elijah explicitly stated that they do not represent anything. Jung interprets them as representing the dual faculties of “precognition and pleasure,” or thinking and feeling. Yup, this is where the thinking/feeling axis on the MBTI test comes from! It comes from Jung trying to make sense of this particular vision. Jung says that “Both are equally old and in nature intimately one,” and interprets the serpent as representing a mediator between the two. Some people are more inclined towards thinking, and others towards feeling, but you need some degree of both to avoid falling out of balance. Jung assumes that because he’s a thinking person, he fears Salome. My bet is, that’s not why. I think he fears Salome because he struggles to see divinity in a stereotypically “evil” figure. He’s struggling against his conditioning that pleasure is evil.

I’m not going to go through Jung’s analysis of the specific symbols in his vision, because to be honest, very little of it resonates for me. Jung does not interpret these visions the way I would, and I think that much of his interpretation misses the obvious because he’s trying so hard to force a disturbing truth into a comfortable framework. But, it’s not my vision or my mystery, so I’m not going to tell him he’s wrong.

Instruction

Jung goes back to Elijah’s house the next night. He says to Elijah,

I have toyed with myself enough. I played hypocritical games with myself and they all would have disgusted me, were it not clever to perform what others expect of me. It seems to me as if I were more real here [in the dream world]. And yet I do not like being here.

I completely relate to the sensation of feeling more real in my dream world than I do in the physical world. I definitely feel like that. But I don’t feel as unsettled in my dream world as Jung does at Elijah and Salome’s house. Jung recognizes that most of his life in the external world involves “hypocritical games,” doing things that don’t really resonate and aren’t really meaningful for the sake of propriety and fitting within the societal expectations that have been set for him. Unfortunately for him, he doesn’t seem comfortable in either world.

I forgot to mention that there is a scrying crystal inside the house. Previously, Jung saw the Garden of Eden and Odysseus with the sirens in the crystal. This time, he sees Mary with baby Jesus, St. Peter, the Pope, then Buddha, then Kali.

Elijah provides Jung with some good advice about thoughts that I could use. Jung says that thoughts are dangerous because men confuse them with themselves, and Elijah says:

Will you therefore confuse yourself with a tree or animal because you look at them and because you exist with them in the same world? Must you be your thoughts, because you are in the world of your thoughts? But your thoughts are just as much outside your self as trees and animals are outside your body.

Because I live in my thoughts, my thoughts cause me a lot of trouble. Thoughts that cause me shame are particularly awful, because I feel like just having the thought reflects badly on me, when really only an action would reflect badly on me. The idea of thought as something separate from myself, something that exists around me as nature physically exists around me, is genuinely good therapeutic advice. (Therapeutic advice from the work of a psychotherapist? You don’t say!) I shouldn’t take my thoughts seriously, or interpret them as expressions of my identity.

Salome calls herself Jung’s sister. He asks who their mother is, and she says that it is Mary. It’s getting worse! Jung is absolutely sent reeling by this revelation:

Is it a hellish dream? Mary, our mother? What madness lurks in your words? The mother of our Savior, our mother? When I crossed your threshold today, I foresaw calamity. Alas! It has come. Are you out of your senses, Salome?

I sort of relate, in that it can be extremely difficult to think that you actually are that special. It seems the height of hubris to claim to be the child of a powerful goddess (yes, I’m calling Mary a goddess, because she functions like one), even when your spirits explicitly tell you that this is the case.

Jung tries to rationally make sense of it by continuing to insist that Elijah and Salome and Mary are symbols that he hasn’t interpreted yet. This is Elijah’s response:

You may call us symbols for the same reason that you can also call your fellow men symbols. But we are just as real as your fellow men. You invalidate nothing and solve nothing calling us symbols. […] We are certainly what you would call real. Here we are, and you have to accept us. The choice is yours.

Daaamn. Of course, Jung insists on interpreting Elijah and Salome as symbols of the “thinking” and “feeling” principles anyway. The idea of the actual entities Elijah and Salome being the same being freaks him out too much. This is one of the big reasons why I think that his interpretations throughout these three chapters are wrong. He can only process all of this by interpreting it as symbolic language as opposed to taking it at face value, because he can’t make sense of it any other way.

If you do not acknowledge your yearning, then you do not follow yourself, but you go on foreign ways that others have indicated to you. So you do not live your life but an alien one. But who should live your life if you do not live it? It is not only stupid to exchange your own life for an alien one, but also a hypocritical game, because you can never really live the life of others, you can only pretend to do it, deceiving the other and yourself, since you can only live your own life. […] To live oneself means: To be one’s own task. Never say that it is a pleasure to live oneself. It will be no joy but a long suffering, since you must become your own creator. If you want to create yourself, then you do not begin with the best and the highest, but with the worst and the deepest. The flowing together of the stream of life is not joy but pain, since it is power against power, guilt and shatters the sanctified.

Good advice in general. Pay attention to what you really want out of life, not what society says you should want. If you only do what everyone around you says you should and acquire what they say you should want, then you’re living someone else’s life instead of your own. No one else is going to live your life for you, and you can’t live anyone else’s life either. So embrace your own desires, and live your own life. That’s not an easy thing, because you have to do the work to reinvent yourself in your own image instead of following someone else’s self-help guidebook (literal or figurative). And you have to begin by doing Shadow work, which is extremely difficult. Everything that you hold sacred will likely ring hollow throughout that process, because you won’t see it in the same way until you can find divinity for yourself.

As the God developed in me, I thought he was a part of my self. I thought that my “I” included him and therefore I took him for my thought. But I also considered that my thoughts were parts of my “I.” Thus I entered into my thoughts, and into the thinking about the God, in that I took him for a part of my self. […] Therefore you love reasonable and orderly thoughts, since you could not endure it if your self was in disordered, that is, unsuitable thoughts. Through your selfish wish, you pushed out of your thoughts everything that you do not consider ordered, that is, unfitting. You create order according to what you know, you do not know the thoughts of chaos, and yet they exist.

Jung confused the developing God for an aspect of himself, just as he worshipped the soul believing it was God. Because he hates thoughts that he considers disorganized or unreasonable, he roots out all the thoughts that don’t fit his projection of what God should be. Where does all the “disordered” thought end up? The Shadow.

My thoughts are not my self, but exactly like the things of the world, alive and dead. Just as I am not damaged through living in a partly chaotic world, so too I am not damaged if I live in my partly chaotic thought world. Thoughts are natural events that you do not possess, and whose meaning you only imperfectly recognize. Thoughts grow in me like a forest, populated by many different animals. But man is domineering in his thinking, and therefore he kills the pleasure of the forest and that of the wild animals. Man is violent in his desire, and he himself becomes a forest and a forest animal. Just as I have freedom in the world, I also have freedom in my thoughts.

This is good advice for me personally. My thoughts can be scary and chaotic, but they do not damage me. I love the image of thoughts being like a forest. I should just enjoy my time amongst the wild things, and the absolute freedom that my thoughts give me, without any shame.

Resolution

Jung dreams that he is standing on a ridge in a wasteland, with day on one side and night on the other. A black snake is on the night side, and a white snake is on the day side. They fight each other, with Elijah watching from above. The black snake’s head turned white, and they both curled around themselves.

Jugn and Elijah climb to a stone circle that is the Temple of the Sun. Elijah turns into Mime (a dwarf from Wagner’s The Ring). Mime brings Jung to springs in a cave, that confer wisdom on those who drink from them. Jung doesn’t trust Mime, and leaves the cave without drinking, feeling discombobulated, and follows a snake to Elijah’s house. He sees a series of visions in the crystal, ending with Christ on the cross with the black serpent coiled about the base. The serpent coils around Jung’s own feet, and up his body — he turns into Aion/Arimanius, the Mithraic lion-headed god. Salome says, “You are Christ.”

This is an amazingly profound experience. Jung experiences the mystery of Christ’s death and resurrection directly, and experiences it in the form of a pagan deity, the primordial creator god Aion or Phanes. In a way, it is the ultimate Mystery. It goes back to what Jung said before about how Christians should not deny that Jesus is a part of them, that you yourself are Christ. That is why Mary is named as Jung’s mother, because he is not separate from Christ.

If you are aggravated against your brother, think that you are aggravated against the brother in you, that is, against what in you is similar to your brother. As a man, you are part of mankind, and therefore you have a share in the whole of mankind, as if you were the whole of mankind. If you overpower and kill your fellow man who is contrary to you, then you also kill that person in yourself and have murdered a part of your life. The spirit of this dead man follows you and does not let your life become joyful. You need your wholeness to live onward.

This is just a lesson on projection again, but I like the phrasing. We’re all one being, all incarnations of the Divine, so any harm we do against each other is harm against the corresponding parts of ourselves. You can’t experience any authentic joy, or really live at all, with that sort of burden. That’s what makes Shadow work worth it.

If you go to thinking, take your heart with you. If you go to love, take your head with you.

I’m still not sure how I feel about the whole thinking/feeling dichotomy, but I like this phrase.

I saw a new God, a child, who subdued daimons in his hand. The God holds the separate principles in his power, he unites them. The God develops through the union of the principles in me. He is their union.

Not much to say about this that I haven’t already said, except that I’m once again reminded of Dionysus, who unites all opposites and commands all daimons. I feel like I can get myself there. Maybe I already am. It feels good to unite opposites in oneself; it’s hard to do, but once you’ve done it, it feels comfortable and fulfilling.

Jung interprets WWI as people learning self-sacrifice, Christ’s mystery, which will teach them to look inward. “The spirit of the depths has seized mankind and forces self-sacrifice upon it.”

That's the end of Liber Primus! I'll start posting the sections of my commentary on Liber Secundus soon. There's more very cool art to come!

[good-beanswrites]

hii hiii is it alright if I request something with kotoko and haruka?(platonic ofc) their character foils drive me insane with all the weak stuff authngghn icant be normal about them

Oooh thank you so much for the request! I realized that these two actually have one of the smallest windows to talk easily, given Haruka's nervousness and Kotoko's T2 changes. They have such interesting approaches to strength/weakness, and I hope I could capture it a bit here! This takes place immediately following Kotoko's bday timeline after Harrow's release:

“I’ll accept those birthday wishes…” Kotoko gave him a wave over her shoulder as she returned to making her bed.  

She shook her head in awe. It was rather impressive how quickly the boy had changed after his verdict. The others had more subtle differences, but he was someone entirely new. She could rest easy, at least, knowing that her verdict wouldn’t change her much. For as long as she could remember, she’d been like this. She knew where she stood, and neither guilty nor innocent verdict would affect that. This verdict was really only an indicator on whether the warden could be trusted or not. 

Her body tensed up when she turned back around, startled by Haruka lingering silently in the doorway. She decided against chastising him for scaring her half to death. Still, she couldn’t keep the bite from her voice as she asked, “did you need something else?”

“Ah… I just…” He twisted his hands together. “I had a question.” 

He fell silent, but Kotoko could tell he was chewing on his next words. She waited.

“H-how do you do it? All the time? You’re older and stronger and braver and I-I just don’t know how.”

“Give yourself some credit. I’m not that much older, or stronger. I only have, what -- two, three years on you? And you did very well in the arm wrestling tournament the other day.” 

She wasn’t being patronizing. For someone so sheltered, Haruka could do some damage. He stood a few inches taller than her. The others had taken the arm wrestling as a little game, but Kotoko had used the event to measure up her fellow prisoners. After his close match with Mikoto, she had made a mental note to take him seriously. 

“No…” his expression twitched, getting frustrated with the misunderstanding. “Not muscles. I mean… you don’t have someone like Muu. You don’t need someone next to you all the time. But you still talk with everyone… and it looks easy. All the time. You always know what to say, and what to do. You never look scared. You never cry.”

Kotoko’s smile softened. She wasn’t the prideful type, but his words gave her a wave of accomplishment. She certainly was scared. She did cry. But she wasn’t about to show a single crack in her resolve in front of anyone here. Haruka had given her the greatest of compliments by confirming her success.

“Ah, you mean strength of spirit. Well, that doesn’t just appear out of nowhere. It comes with my purpose, with my virtues.”

“Virtues…?”

“I see the injustice around me, and want to protect the innocent. When I see how awful the world can be, when I see the monsters that are hurting those who are weak, I can’t help myself.” She clenched her fist. “The power to do so just comes to me.” 

“Oh…” Haruka looked down at his palms. 

Her heart sank, realizing he didn’t quite understand. It was a shame that not all of humanity could be as righteous as her. That heroic drive had always come so naturally to her; she wasn’t sure she could put it into words to explain to others.

Haruka’s open hands were trembling. “Um. Is there any other way?”

“Hm?”

“All my life… I only cause pain to everyone.” His worry gradually turned to desperation.” I hurt everyone who gets close to me. Especially things that are small and weak. My whole life, I’ve been nothing but a… a curse. So… is there another way? Please. I want to be better. I want to be strong! I want to be like you! Tell me!”

He stepped forward, pleading. Kotoko stepped back. 

His blue eyes widened at her sudden shift into defense. “Ah! I. I’m sorry. I’m-I’m sorry. It’s your birthday. You should be… Have a g-good day.”

“Wait.” Kotoko stopped him before he could flee. She was aware of the massive gap between them, the vastly different backgrounds they came from. Still, she offered the same advice that had helped her in her toughest of days. 

“Don’t worry so much about others’ strength. The quickest way to burn yourself out is getting overwhelmed with the power that’s all around you. Once you start putting all your focus toward honing your own skills and strengths, you’ll realize how much you’re truly capable of. You don’t need anyone else. You’ll realize that you are enough.”

“I… am enough…?”

She placed a hand firmly on his shoulder. 

“So, no need to get all worked up now, okay?” 

“O-okay. I’ll do my best.” He stiffened, trying to appear worthy of her words.

She let out a bitter laugh. “I told the others not to do anything for my birthday, but I don’t think they paid me any mind.” Kotoko still couldn’t fathom how they were so friendly with each other given the situation. “Let’s go see if there’s some cake or something.”

[im-out-of-it]

you like gabriel and gideon?? yasss share some hcs of them or with their partners pls

do I like Gabriel and Gideon? YES I LOVE THEM (this will be long so BEWARE) (quick edit, I DONT KNOW IF I DID THIS RIGHT NO ONE HAS EVER ASKED FOR MY OPINION BEFORE LMAO)

I feel they get severely mistreated. Gabriel is talked about in TID as this bad person. but is he really a bad person? his little sister gets humiliated so he takes matters in his hands (even if he fails) and then gets branded as the person who’s the problem. when it’s actually Will. Will is the one with the fake curse who treats everyone like shit and gets zero repercussions for it. what is so terrible that Gabriel did? I mean, he does say some stuff about Jem (not his proudest moment) but he ends up stepping away from his father, his fathers actions, and ends up trying to become a better person.

the fact that Will tries to make it seem that gabriel is only interested in Cecily to “get back” at Will is insane. SOME PEOPLE HAVE OTHER CONCERNS ADMIRATIONS HOPES DREAMS THAT DONT INVOLVE YOU WILL. Gabriel isn’t the one treating a woman as his whore but that’s for another day 😌 in my mind, gabriel is passionate, he has a soft side, and he will fight for what is his. I truly think he’s a wonderful father but it’s a shame we didn’t see him actually be a parent. the writing doesn’t allow us to see Gabriel’s growth. Anna can be seen as problematic and Christopher going to Grace after what she did to James is a little out of character but that’s mainly the writing. CC doesn’t understand how to execute her characters and show growth unless she accidentally does it for someone she doesn’t care about

Gabriel is one of my favorite lightwoods. he’s got one of those soft hearts and uses this defense with his sarcasm and jokes so people can’t hurt him. he has to kill his father and the whole thing ends up being a joke which I think is insanely messed up. I think the whole Gabriel and Will thing doesn’t get talked about. yeah Will has trauma but he uses it as an excuse to be awful to everyone. Gabriel has trauma but he tries to grow from it. Gabriel isn’t out here saying “oh I killed my father and had a bad childhood so I can treat you how I see fit.” I don’t ever recall Will ever apologizing or showing growth for his actions. but I do see Gabriel saying how he wishes to change and actually changing.

imagine if Gabriel humiliated Cecily or used Will’s fathers issues as a joke and song. then everyone would be like “omg Gabriel can you stop being a dickish bastard for one second please?” but Will jests on Gabriel’s trauma so all is well I guess. I don’t think Gabriel gets enough love. I just think almost everyone making Gabriel’s trauma into a song and joke is vastly disgusting and messed up and I hate no one ever talks about it

I adore Gabriel and Cecily together. I think they fit really well together. they’re both fierce, strong, and passionate. it’s a shame we didn’t get to see them grieve Christopher or any of their development. Gabriel not saying anything when Alexander gets kidnapped is sloppy and lazy writing. these two really get shoved in the back after TID

one of my fav Gabriel moments is when he tosses that demon into the river and his one liners are BEAUTIFUL

GIDEON!!!!!! what a sweet, beautiful, and thoughtful man. it’s funny how before he’s introduced, they’re like “you think Gabriel’s awful? wait for his brother” and he’s the most kindest man. is the evil in the room with us????? it’s adorable how he cusses in Spanish because he’s happy 🥲 Gideon tripping over his words and making a fool of himself for Sophie is high tier entertainment. Gideon seems to be a very calm soul. where Gabriel is a more reckless storm, Gideon is the calmness we need. he’s strict with Gabriel but it’s because he wants the best for Gabriel. I’ll always love the moody and quiet brother with the loud and always has something to say brother. we didn’t get enough of them bonding and arguing

now Gideon gets some growth. he goes to Spain and understands his father is wrong and he actively chooses to leave, tries to bring his brother back, and actually helps Charlotte. he’s another of my favorite characters. he’s very quiet but when he has something to say, it’s loud and clear. Thomas really embodies gideon and Sophie. I also really love Sophie and Gideon! Sophie takes a backseat after TID which is another shame

Sophie takes no prisoners and I love her calling out anyone who disrespects her family and herself. (Tessa acting like Gideon is a bad person and trying to warn Sophie off, girl the man you like treats you as some whore shut up already) it’s sad we don’t get more of Sophie. it would’ve been nice to see her as a shadowhunter and the family dynamic. Sophie and Gideon are just really good people full of love. it shows in their parenting because of what we see of Thomas, Eugenia, and some of Barbara. I think Gabriel and Gideon used their traumatic upbringing and decided to be better than what they had. they broke the cycle in a way. and this is only pertaining to their kids, I have no clue what happened to make Robert who he was 😬

one of my fav highlights of Gideon: when he tries to purpose to Sophie and his dry humor and MAN HES JUST SO FUCKING PRECIOUS AND MUST BE PROTECTED and I love Gideon defending Thomas 🥹

I don’t think their treatment gets talked about enough. they are almost perceived as the villains when they have the most growth in TID and are far from being villains. I think they’re both very funny and Gideon seems to have a dry humor that isn’t appreciated enough. in my head, they’re super supportive of one another and constantly are hosting family nights together. I don’t believe the whole the merry thieves first meeting at the academy when their families are close. I really see Gideon and Alastair bonding and hitting it off right away. I also see Gabriel and Cecily being like “we’ve had our childhood taken from us so we are here for you” and just making Alastair feel at home. (IN A GOOD WAY)

I really hate how Gabriel and Cecily get left behind. they don’t get to grieve Christopher. Anna desperately needs some guidance and little Alexander’s kidnapping doesn’t get mentioned or is the focus. we do get to see gideon and Sophie kind of grieve Barbara, but I would have wanted to see more of them with Thomas and Eugenia gets left out. when Thomas gets accused of murder, we don’t see Sophie anywhere near Thomas or see Thomas have a conversation with Gideon about it.

Gideon and Gabriel are severely underrated and underutilized. they’re the best part of TID (besides Jem) and the only reason I read that ghastly series. they don’t get talked about enough that I see. they get this villain treatment from CC when they’re anything but that. we don’t get to see Gabriel and Gideon much in TLH (which I get it’s not about them but it wouldn’t hurt to feature them) so that’s also sad

but all in all, I love these two so much and I wish we could have had more of them. they’re beautiful, passionate, fun, and humorous together 🥹 (you made me realize more how much I miss them so thank you) I could take more of Gabriel and Gideon tripping over their words and literally themselves to impress the women they’re in love with. it’s a real treat

[paracosmicparadox]

So I finished FFXV ages ago, but I've been thinking about it lately bc you know, I elaborated the chocobros' story far further than it was meant to go and got way more attached to them than I should have. So here're some things that the game did really well and some of the things it didn't. (you don't have to agree w anything here; I'm not trying to corrupt y'all w my opinions; I just feel like talking)

Let's start with the bad to get it out of the way:

CINDY. I swear to everything holy her character had the potential to be So Cool if she hadn't been so overtly over-sexualized. Like, I'm a woman-liker too and I get it, lady mechanics are hot af, but you know what else is attractive? Safety in the workplace. Cindy's outfit was not something any mechanic would be caught dead wearing. Yeah, it was designed to be sexy, but do you know how many burns she would've accumulated from the hot oil and metal she works with? There's a reason mechanics typically wear clothing zipped up when they're actually working on something. If anything, Cindy's character design just made me uncomfortable. Her character itself? Great. No qualms there. Her design? Please acquire more than two square feet of fabric I'm begging you. I just feel like Cindy deserved to be so much more than fan service.

Luna's brief time on-screen. Yet another potentially incredible and deep female protagonist who got short change from this game. People joke a lot that Luna wasn't at all an important character because the game never really treated her like one. She was MEANT to be important, clearly, but it felt like she existed just for her tearjerking death scene? Like there was SO MUCH overlooked potential to bring her into the storyline as more than Tragic Love Interest In White, and yet?? Idk it frustrated me.

The emotional aspect of the game felt rushed. There were a lot of emotional scenes covered throughout the plotline ranging from King Regis's death to the deal with Prompto at Zegnautus Keep. I feel like the game TRIED to cover them realistically and show the characters' grief, but it didn't quite get there. It was just sort of an "Oh, how sad. I'm so upset and angry. Hm, what's that? My friends believe in me without truly understanding and I can kill someone to ease my pain? Oh okay I'm better now." I get that realistic healing cycles are kinda hard to portray within a set timeframe, but having some lingering effects of the blatant trauma inflicted would've been nice. You don't recover from shit like that in a week's time.

Character personalities tended to be one-sided. Noctis was edgy, Prompto was happy-go-lucky, Gladio was tough-guy, and Ignis was... nevermind, Iggy was great--- HE had some on-screen depth. Personally, I've developed these characters myself far more than what the game gave us, but I wish we'd gotten more canon depth beyond their surface-level traits. I love them with my whole heart and they deserve genuine complexity.

Now the things I actually really enjoyed:

The graphics were on-point. The amount of detail put into character design and into monsters was insane. You could zoom in and see individual textures on skin and hair and feathers, bringing a level of realism to the game that I personally enjoyed.

All of the Latin and Norse mythological references!! As a Latin nerd, I found little gems everywhere in this game. Esp in the names--- (Noctis Lucis Caelum = Of-the-night Sky-of-light (the genitives in there make the literal translation kinda a mouthful ik) Gladiolus Amicitia = Sword-flower Friendship (the gladiolus is an actual flower that gets its name from the Latin word gladius, meaning sword, for its sword-like shape) Ignis Scientia = Fire Knowledge; Prompto Argentum = Ready Silver (the word prompto is actually in the dative (possibly ablative), making the literal translation nonsense, but if they'd made his name Promptus, it would've sounded awkward, so I can see why they picked the dative/ablative form of the adjective for stylistic reasons and I put the rough translation instead)) WOW THAT WAS A LOT OF PARENTHETICAL INFO WHOOPS

Ardyn's character. I'm not saying this bc I'm one of the fans who fawn over him---Ardyn is DEFINITELY NOT MY PREFERRED FLAVOR OF MAN, but character-wise, he made an excellent antagonist. He was witty, slick, and classy in an I'm-gonna-outstep-you-like-it's-hopscotch sorta way. He was a poetic villain done well, which made him an antagonist you could both sympathize for and absolutely detest given the situation. He was both the master manipulator and the pawn one space away from the edge of the board. He can sway a crowd, but you know deep in your gut just by the cunning greed in his eyes that You Cannot Trust The Man. He was definitely Not a good person (tragic backstory isn't an excuse), but he was a good villain.

I loved the bond between the chocobros?? This is probably bc I'm a sucker for the found family trope, but their interactions were so amazing to me?? Like, not even the cutscene stuff. Just their little sidebar conversations during fights or while you're walking around or driving the Regalia. They're Roadtrip Buddies™ and I think that's excellent.

THE FOOD. By god, the food in this game looked absolutely scrumptious and I would like to partake. The Daggerquill Soup? Give it to me I'll pay you. The Creamy Crustacean Omelet? Stop it right now I'll eat that so fast it'll be a criminal offense. Like I know I touched on the graphics earlier, but broski I was not kidding. I guess I know why the game took so long to make it to the market bc the detail that went into these recipes is absolutely mouthwatering.

[ggren-mainz]

Umineko - question arcs playthrough -> ep 2 - 1

last part - All parts and episodes - next part

Welcome back after an almost 2-week break, it's time for the next chapter ;P. Also i decided I'll introduce my gf and family to umineko via the stageplay, as i have heard that it's pretty good. Only up to ep 3 (soon 4) now, but anyways.

edit 2 days later as this sat in drafts : Watched it with my sis (my mom deemed it too tiring) and she loved it. Her favorite is George (both the character and the actor ;P), and she had some very interesting theories, one of them being that genji is kinzo's child, which damn. Age-wise i don't think it works but at least she's thinking. Also the outro was very confusing but i think it might've revealed some stuff. I'm not sure, but I'll keep it in mind. Anyways amazing watch.

She also did the tierlist and it's so funny

Anyways

I want to start this by saying that the culprit actually showed to me in a dream. That's right, i had a premonition. Basically the dream was me and some friends running in a destroyed world from Shannon with a gun. So what I'm getting to is that I now solved the mystery, and will now just laugh for the following 7 chapters. Ha ha ha.

(pls if shannon actually has any relation with the culprit/is the culprit, do not tell me or make any jokes/imply it. I am simply fooling around because of this quite funny dream i had)

rocking that victorian newspaper boy inspired fit.

and the hippie look. Perfect case of underdressed x overdressed. Also Tomitake Flash?????

this reads like some insane foreshadowing. Or at least it's definitely related to our little characters as well. You could say that they're like fish from the perspective of the witches. anyways, I'll put s mental pin to this line and perhaps rethink it later.

glad to see she's included in the credits now.

Anyways what's with this aquarium date?? When is it happening? Basically George and Shannon are on a date, and are just having fun, being very cute.

can't really figure out if this line should mean more or not. Cause like it's not that weird, but also it could turn into something more sinister later. I'll see.

And they say romance is dead.

Oh also another thing we (me and my sis) noticed yesterday while watching the play, but George is 23 and Shannon is 16.... raises one eyebrow. Ok george...ok...

....what magic? Hey shannon i think George will understand it very well why not explain it to us?

OOooohhh so this happens before the first game time wise. ok ok makes sense.

woah woah woah this is a bit of a change of atmosphere.

so from how much i'm getting this is Shannon talking about breaking free from her fate as 'furniture'. She is on the shrine's rock (the one that was destroyed at the beginning of ch 1) and wants to break some mirror that was offered as a sacrifice. I wonder, does that mean that because she broke this mirror, the shrine broke down and as such somehow started this entire tragedy?

is the key here metaphorical, or could it be referring to the key in the ephitath?

what promise? what wish? so many questions....question arc moment....

We then have a long scene of George and his family visiting the main house, and Shannon realising her crush on him, and some discussions between the George Jessica and her. These 2 are very cute, unfortunately it seems that Eva wants to marry George with someone who would benefit them financially/bussiness wise.

and as such it leads me to the question. Did she marry like this? Was her marriage with Hideyoshi like this oooorrr....

(before this she says that she loves her husband a lot), ah i see. I mean it's not like this doesn't happen nowadays too, except instead of getting married and then falling in love it's more like getting together and then falling in love. Which is fine, but idk if in this world this is ideal, as i doubt divorce is that accepted lol. And also ofc cause we know George loves Sayo.

anyways Eva continues talking and then takes George away and then tells the girls they'll also find men they love but then leans in and whispers something so vile and malicious in Shannon's ear, that my computer crashed and i had to restart the game lmao.

after a lot of ctrl-ing this is what she says. Bad but i think my computer overexaggerated.

So Shannon feels like shit and is caught with her head in the clouds by Natsuhi who punishes her to clean the entire reception.

mayhaps i shouldn't have wondered so far lmao. (for context i was curious if Lanon was an actual character or was just gonna remain a name and then i kept seeing yasu and here i am lol)

this is what detroit become human and what i also assume nier automata (idk i only played the prologue) wished they could be.

huuuuuh??? So again this brings me back to my question, does magic actually exist? i think so. But maybe Shannon is imagining this and all those flashy bunny rabbits I see online are Kinzo's personal strippers, idk.

Holly shit guys, look! it's the witch!!

Also is this story very related to love? I didn't expect that, interesting. Maybe it's just this chapter or a sub-genre but idk ill see. Also she already has the ring on.

hmm is it really that simple? You know how they say, don't make a deal with the devil, this is how this feels.

Huh i can't believe all my questions have been answered. So this is why she broke the mirror, this is the wish and also the promise and also the magic. Makes sense.

Also wait i just had a thought. Does Shannon break the mirror each loop, or did by any chance Kanon break it last time. Because you remember he said before he died that she should wait "another 100 years in hell for the next summoner" and assuming this summons the witch...

*shakes* who is it????

hmmm this sounds...suspiciously similar to Eva. Is she saying this because she wants to intimidate her and convince her to break the mirror or is Eva somehow behind this?

and this is just the exact quote. Why is she quoting her? Just to remind her? And if she doesn't just wanna remind her and she just thinks this then why call Kinzo Father? Is she related to him? Me and my sis have talked about the possibility of her being somehow related to Kinzo, like a daughter thingy. I'm not sure, and i definitely don't have enough clues to figure it out rn but anyways. Kinda hard to fake all of this tbh.

Immediatly after this line Kanon comes in to save Shannon, and after some more talking Beatrice gives both of them a butterfly shaped burn/bruise mark on their left palms. She does that by controlling their hands, which immediately remembered me of the ending scene in the stageplay, where Shannon and Kanon "shoot" each other with their hands in the shape of a pistol. who knows. I obviously dont.

these things are getting longer and longer...

next part

[touchstoneaf]

I'm reading summaries and transcripts, and once in a while forcing myself to watch episodes of anything after season 3 of Smallville (solely so that I can rewrite them in a way that's much more coherent (and CLexy, but that goes w/o saying))... and my GOD, they are so dumb sometimes. Poor Michael. having to convincingly say shit like "your girlfriend was possessed by the ghost of a witch" with a straight face! (Side note what the actual fuck is the plot in this season? Season 4 is insane and I don't even want to talk about it.) Yes the show has always been a little goofy and has some storylines that are questionable... but they are really pushing it now.

Also one of the main strengths of the show is the chemistry between Michael and Tom, and yet they have full episodes where they don't even interact, and it's just like, *what* are you doing?! And then to top it off, each summary just gets more and more ridiculous and complicated as the seasons goes on, and I'm just like oh thank god I have simplified it in fanfiction! They are no damn witches (because let me not even get started on how witches are portrayed in most TV shows!), there are no spirits floating around trying to possess people (just because you have Kryptonite around does not mean you get to hand-wave literally anything at all. Why in the hell would a Kryptonite nodule or some dust cause ghosts to exist? It affects *living cells* with *radiation*. I don't even understand why they would make a decision like that. They really must have been desperate for stories already, and we're not even halfway through the show yet).

I'm not going to even get started on my main gripes with the show that have existed from the beginning, like turning Superman into a self-serving, abusive, selfish liar who lies, or the fact that their main "villain" was created out of victim-blaming and abuse and then everybody's just gleefully happy for Lex be treated like shit for no fucking reason whatsoever, while his Literally Evil father is turned into some kind of pseudo "good" guy. Cuz yeah, abusers should be redeemable. but their victims should end up alone and tortured and treated like shit by everybody around them. That totally makes sense. I won't get started, I really won't, because I will be here all day. Or the fact that nobody seems to have figured out that Clark is a meta at the very least, when he does all kinds of weird shit all the time. These people are smart. Chloe and Lex especially are not fucking stupid by any stretch. It just simply would not have taken them four or more years to realize that he could easily one of the mutants in town. Nobody would be shocked in the slightest; but they play it like they're just too stupid to figure it out, and it's terrible because Clark is the worst liar in the universe.

Also, somebody who's not yet Superman is not going to be fighting beings like Doomsday when they're still like 20. It's just not going to happen. I'm not even getting started on creepy stuff like how they're totally sexualizing someone who's playing a minor because she is their eye candy on the show. Lana and Kristin deserved better! The female lead who basically existed to further the two guys' storylines for like three seasons finally gets her own story... but it's about being possessed by an ancient witch or some shit? They are actually sexualizing her near death experience, like some kind of creepy PG snuff film (who actually made the decision of trying to make Lana being slowly suffocated a weird sexy vibe?! So fucking problematic I don't even know where to start). And then the male lead's other love interest is summarily killed by their cardboard cutout villain of the week with his lack of character development, simply so that she can't get in the way of Supes' future storyline, because she was literally created only to be a roadblock to his future goals, masquerading as something to keep him from actually being lonely to death. All she did wrong was to wish she could free of stigma about Mental Health... then shortly afterward, when she was essentially killed about it, he turns around and is fine again because he gets a football scholarship. What the fuck?! (Yes, I'm looking at you, Pariah).

I can't even with this show sometimes. I'm so glad I quit when I did. I tend to forget how insane and Incredibly questionable a lot of it is until I have to watch something of it in order to rewrite it. But I guess that's why there's fanfic in the first place!

[dobithequack]

My Opinions on the designs for the fearsome four in Ducktales 2017!

Cause I have nothing better to do with my life on a random day.

I think these aren't the most ✨ORIGINAL✨ opinions on the 2017 designs for the fearsome four in the "Let's get dangerous" episode. But I'll do it anyways. (Cause Darkwing has my brain 24/7)

Friendly reminder: this is just my opinion and you're 100% allowed to disagree and tell me what you think, what you agree and what you disagree with and tell me your own opinion on them! With that being said. I'll start my crazy ramblings.

While Quackerjack and Megavolt didn't change at all (honestly, they look amazing in the Ducktales 2017 art style) I love how well they fit in with the art style of the show and how good they look. Again, they may not have changed anything. But I love them anyways.

Quackerjack

I like Quackerjack's now EXPRESSIVE eyebrows and the fact I can finally tell where his face is in the mask. His eyes used to be really close to each other, I have a hard time drawing his face sometimes and how to shape it, when I use the 2017 design for reference it actually gets easier.

And please.

The sparkle of joy someone could get by seeing Michael bell reprise his role as the insane and extremely hilarious quackerjack. The mix of 2D with 3D looked so nice and honestly I just genuinely love Quackerjack's insane laughs

I just have a liking for insane characters and jesters in general. It's a habit lol

MegaVolt.

When you hear his voice, you can tell that it's not Megavolt's original voice actor doing his voice, but the new one did an amazing job voicing him.

I kinda wish we get to see more of him. As I really like MegaVolt as a character in the original show, as he is really relatable (haha, laugh at the dude that relates to villains.) and how fun he was with how PARANOID he can be when being around water (imagine the heart attack he had when meeting Liquidator for the first time lol they would have had an interesting dynamic if they had the chance to interact more.) out of all the characters, he surely had too little screentime in let's get dangerous alongside Bushroot. But they had to do so much in only less than an hour, so I completely get it.

Sorry I don't have much to say about Quackerjack and Megavolt, they just didn't change that much compared to the other two... Speaking of them.

Bushroot.

They did an amazing job giving Bushroot that Zombie like design, as well as making him a silent villain in respect of his voice actor, who sadly passed away. (Huge respect for that.)

I love the colour pallete used for him here, as now a zombie, his colour pallete is more "faded away" compared to the vivid colours in his original design and I honestly like it! I like it a lot! It's a interesting change of character for Bushroot that I genuinely like, but sadly, not explored that much.

I honestly love this design and I can easily see the different outcomes the Bushroot centered episodes would have taken with Bushroot looking like this. (Especially beauty and the beet. Rhonda's reaction would have been completely different towards Reginald after becoming the plant zombie) Comparing that to original Bushroot, you can see that it is a bit of an improvement, plus the characterization would be completely different.

(am I the only one who gets weirded out when people portray 1991 Bushroot as a twink who can't do anything for himself? (Especially in the Liquiroot ship... Or any Bushroot ship in general, some of y'all take the bottom and top a bit too far. Jesus Christ.) Y'all know that every villain (Bushroot included) almost killed Gosalyn multiple times, right? He ain't a little weakling, he just doesn't know how to use his own powers properly, also Bushroot and the fearsome four tried to man-up and kill "Negaduck" in "just us justice ducks", friendly reminder on that.)

In the original show, Bushroot had moments where he had a lot of confidence in doing his "evil" stuff, I say evil like that, cause Bushroot had potential to be redeemed and that would have been a good concept if it was explored and if it was explored correctly. I think this version of Bushroot just... doesn't seem to have the same possibility, I think he is just a zombie with little to no emotions now, which HONESTLY would have been fun to see how he would have interacted with the rest of other menbers of the fearsome four. Kinda sad we didn't saw much of him in the episode. But again, so much in only less than an hour. It's completely understandable why his screentime was limited.

Now. My boy.

Liquidator...

Oh boy. I'm surely going to get murked for this.

But I hate this design so badly. Don't get me wrong. Y'all can enjoy your buff water guy all you want, he's all yours (I see you people 🫵👁️_👁️) but the way they just... MADE HIM BUFF feels so weird to me.

I get it that cause he is a DOG made of WATER and sometimes dogs in media are portrayed as buff characters with a few exceptions like goofy and Max (and a some background characters in Darkwing and ducktales 2017) and when you combine that with the fact that he can shapeshift his body at will, you could eventually come up with this. I see what they were going with it but the thing is. Wasn't his whole deal is that he was just a water salesman?

When you compare how he looks in the reboot to how he looks the original, you will see the noticeable difference between the two. Sure, you can use the "he can shapeshift his body at will" thing as a reason to why he looks lik that, but I simply cannot see a reason on to WHY he would do that. I do like the tail they gave him in the reboot tho, that was kinda missing on his design lol. And I'll be honest, seeing how people used to go. "NO! 1991 LIQUIDATOR BETTER!" "NO! 2017 LIQUIDATOR BETTER!" Back then And some still do till this day. Was kinda funny to me, especially when both still deal with the same issue. No personality outside being a salesman. Just like in the original show, all liquidator does is... Stand there and talk, especially talk in slogans. As he was a salesman always trying to sell his water. A sad reminder that not even the comics did him some justice, they did him dirty. (And I say this as liquidator fan who BEGS for more fan-content about him.) some people forget that he went from a serious salesman to a... SURPRISINGLY funny and cheerful villain, he always talks like he is in a commercial and he was so hilarious to me. Now he got turned into a (kinda) serious buff guy with the element of being a salesman in him. I hate the fact that we never got to see how exactly his dynamic with Bushroot would have been because, unlike Megavolt and Quackerjack, they never got episodes that focused on the two, all the episodes where they appeared and talked to each other had Quackerjack and Megavolt with them. And in let's get dangerous. He still lacked proper screentime and personality but again, the reason for that is the "too much in little time with a lot to focus on."

We had the plot with Gosalyn's missing Grandpa and interdimentional portal, The boys and Scrooge finding out about F.O.W.L AND the plot with the villains. All of that IN LESS THAN AN HOUR. There was too much going on and the fact that the show got cancelled, so they couldn't do much for the fearsome four (plus the deleted scene with Jim Starling/Negaduck) but I'm happy the fearsome four got to appear. As they are my favourite super villain team to exist.

Now a question at the end, how tall do you guys make the fearsome four be in YOUR HeadCanons? Again. HeadCanons. Everyone has different opinions and that's completely fine. As long as they're not problematic.

From tallest to shortest, my HeadCanon heights for them are:

Bushroot being the tallest, as he is now a tree. Literally. Quackerjack and Liquidator being the same height. With liquidator being slightly shorter. And lastly, Megavolt. The shorty.

In the original Darkwing duck show, their heights were the most inconsistent mystery there qas, as I pointed out in this post I made about the inconsistencies. So for my upcoming designs, I decided to give them consistent heights. (And yes, Megavolt is taller than Negaduck, obviously.)

And I won't take the heights in the Ducktales reboot because this is more of my own Darkwing duck AU heights i'm talking about, and again, I don't like 2017 liquidator. So let me know yours.

Again, all of these are my opinions and you're free to disagree with them and tell me your own!

Thank you for listening to my insanity! 🌼