#Medical Routine Adherence

[leanonmehomecareinc]

Home care can contribute to a care recipient’s health and well-being in myriad ways, encompassing both physical and emotional aspects. If this is something you would like to explore further, Lean On Me Home Care, Inc. has you covered!

[psychiatryutopia]

Understanding bipolar disorder can be challenging, especially when navigating the different phases it entails. Behavioral health care in Kensington, Maryland focuses on educating patients about these phases to empower them with the knowledge needed for effective management. Bipolar disorder is characterized by episodes of mania, hypomania, depression, and mixed states, each presenting unique challenges.

[resiliencebehavioralhealthllc]

Mastering Medication Management for Mental Health

Medication management is a vital aspect of maintaining your mental health and well-being. If you or someone you know is on prescription, these tips can help achieve better adherence.

Learn more: https://www.resiliencebhllc.com/mastering-medication-management-for-mental-health

[the-maddened-hatter]

Honestly Monk was SUCH a good show for me to see as a young teen I'm ngl. Like yeah, it's not an overly accurate representation of OCD and I'm sure there's things that probably didn't age very well, but OH MY GOD can you even comprehend how amazing it was to get to see a canonically disabled, ND, and, more specifically, PROFOUNDLY ANXIOUS badass main character when you're a freshly diagnosed autistic & anxious young 12-13 year old with the only real advice from a crappy psychiatrist being to "learn to step out of your comfort zone or consider beginning prescription medications."

To get to see "do it scared" depicted in cinematic action in both heroic and relatively mundane contexts. A touch-averse, routine adhering, socially awkward, sensory issue having character as a SMART AND COURAGEOUS PROTAGONIST!

Hell, it was pretty amazing (for me at least) to see a character use those disinfectant handwipes every episode! I have severe food allergies and I have to carry a pack or canister with me for when I need to eat in town or when I've had to go into a grocery store and now that there's a pandemic and food allergies are rather more of an understood issue it's not all that weird a thing to have, but at the time it was definitely yet another step apart from peers and by god was it awesome to see a (again, smart and awesome) character use them too, even if it wasn't for quite the same reasons.

There's things that took longer to germinate too (and tbh still are).

That you don't owe people being "normal and easy". Yes, you have to be cognizant of their needs, boundaries, and how your behavior affects them, but it's still okay to need help and to do things in odd ways and have unusual needs.

That sometimes you're going to fail, do things badly, not be able to be as reasonable as you logically know you should. That logic can't always beat fear even when it should, and that it doesn't make YOU a failure, it means you have to try again another time or try differently.

And that sometimes people aren't as good for you as they seem, no matter how much history you have, and it hurts, it truly does, but sometimes it leads you to connect, by pure chance, with a compassionate stranger, and time will make the disparities between them clearer to the point that when you look back you don't know how you ever thought they were your ally just because they put up with your problems

[crystalsenergy]

🩵 Uranus in Aquarius through houses - brief Astro Notes ♅ ♒ 🩵

Uranus in Aquarius, unlike previous generations of Uranus, carries Uranian traits with greater openness and ease. This means that people born under Uranus in Aquarius tend to flow much more easily with Uranian energies and lessons, as there is no conflict between the sign and the planet—after all, Uranus rules Aquarius.

Furthermore, from the perspective of New Age Astrology that I strive to promote, individuals born under Uranus in Aquarius likely bring the potential to anchor more energies of originality and new movements, rather than solely adhering to the traditional and established norms.

Uranus brings innovation and growth. Expansion.

🪞

Uranus in Aquarius in 1st house

A strong desire to break free from traditional roles and expectations can lead you to carve out a very unique personal identity.

You might have a highly original approach to self-expression and appearance. People often see you as eccentric or ahead of your time.

Your personal style and appearance might frequently change, reflecting your innovative and eccentric personality.

You may frequently change hairstyles, adopting unique fashion trends, or creating a signature look that becomes iconic.

You might possess an "electric" presence that draws people in and makes a lasting impression. People find your energy stimulating and inspiring.

Your birth or early childhood might have been marked by unusual circumstances or significant changes that set the stage for your unique life path.

You may experience sudden shifts in your sense of identity, leading to transformative changes in how you see yourself and present yourself to the world.

🌿

Uranus in Aquarius in 2nd house

Your inner values can change over time.

There could be a knack for spotting groundbreaking ideas and trends before they become mainstream.

There can be a sense of detachment from material possessions, valuing freedom and independence over wealth.

A sense of detachment from traditional materialism can lead to a more minimalist lifestyle, where freedom and flexibility are more valuable than owning many possessions.

You may find unique ways to earn money, such as through technology, unconventional careers, or unusual investments.

Your sense of self-worth might be tied to your ability to innovate and think outside the box rather than traditional measures of success.

🗣️

Uranus in Aquarius in 3rd house

Traditional educational paths may not appeal to you; instead, you prefer learning through unconventional or self-directed methods.

You might communicate in highly original ways, often using technology or new media to express your ideas.

You can experience sudden flashes of insight and innovative ideas, often appearing out of nowhere.

🧬

Uranus in Aquarius in 4th house

You value personal space and freedom within your home environment, often needing room to express your individuality.

There could be a history or need of rebellion or eccentricity in your family, influencing your sense of home and belonging.

Your home life might be unconventional, perhaps living in an unusual setting or with a non-traditional family structure.

🎨

Uranus in Aquarius in 5th house

Your approach to creativity is highly innovative, often exploring cutting-edge art forms, technology, or experimental methods.

Your hobbies and leisure activities are likely to be unusual or ahead of their time, reflecting your inventive spirit.

🩺

Uranus in Aquarius in 6th house

Routine work environments might feel stifling.

There is a tendency to challenge traditional workplace norms and introduce innovative ideas.

Interest in alternative health practices and / or cutting-edge medical technologies can be prominent.

🧑‍🤝‍🧑👩‍🤝‍🧑👩‍🤝‍👩

Uranus in Aquarius in 7th house

You excel in collaborative efforts that involve innovation, technology, or social reform.

You may attract partners who are eccentric, innovative, or rebellious, reflecting your own Uranian qualities.

There can be a strong rebellion against traditional relationship roles, favoring equality and a non-hierarchical approach.

Technology plays a significant role in your relationships, from how you meet partners to how you maintain connections, for example, meeting a life partner through an online platform or maintaining a relationship via virtual reality or other advanced communication tools.

You seek partners who are unconventional and value independence. Traditional relationships may feel restrictive.

Partnerships can undergo sudden and unexpected changes, requiring flexibility and openness.

Your approach to partnerships, both personal and professional, is likely to be unconventional. You may be drawn to relationships that allow for freedom and individuality.

🌑

Uranus in Aquarius in 8th house

You are interested in revolutionary approaches to transformation.

You are interested in unconventional psychological methods.

Shared finances and resources can be subject to sudden changes, requiring adaptability.

Inheritances or shared resources might come through unusual or unexpected means, such as digital assets, intellectual property, or non-traditional bequests.

You might be drawn to exploring taboo or unconventional subjects related to sex, death, and rebirth.

A deep fascination with esoteric sciences, metaphysics, and unconventional spiritual practices might drive your exploration of the unknown and hidden aspects of life.

You might have a unique and revolutionary approach to personal transformation, embracing methods such as self-acceptance through experimental therapies, or cutting-edge psychological practices.

Technology plays a significant role in your transformative processes, possibly using advanced tools and platforms for deep psychological and emotional work.

🚵📚

Uranus in Aquarius in 9th house

A strong need for freedom in your beliefs and philosophical views can lead you to resist dogmatic or rigid ideologies. You value open-mindedness and the ability to explore various perspectives without restriction.

Your beliefs and philosophies are likely to be unconventional, often challenging traditional or mainstream views.

Your spiritual and philosophical views are likely to be progressive, rebellious, or futuristic. You may follow or create, for example, a new-age belief system that incorporates advanced technology or futuristic concepts.

You are prone to experiencing sudden and profound epiphanies or insights that can dramatically alter your worldview.

You are drawn to alternative forms of education, such as online learning, progressive institutions, or self-directed study.

Travel experiences can be unconventional or involve unusual destinations, promoting personal growth and broadening perspectives.

Your worldview is likely to be global or even universal, transcending national and cultural boundaries. You may feel a deep connection to the idea of a united humanity or even to extraterrestrial civilizations. (I'm Uranus in 9th house and I relate to this a looot.)

👨‍🎓👩‍🎓🏢

Uranus in Aquarius in 10th house

You may experience sudden and unexpected changes in your career, requiring flexibility and a willingness to adapt.

Your career trajectory can be highly unconventional and non-linear, with sudden shifts and changes that may seem unpredictable to others.

You are seen as a trailblazer in your professional life, often challenging the status quo.

You might be seen as someone who challenges norms and introduces groundbreaking ideas in your field.

Your unconventional approach can sometimes lead to public controversies or resistance, as your ideas and methods might challenge the status quo.

Your career goals are likely to be visionary and aimed at creating significant, long-term change rather than short-term success.

Leading a global initiative to bring renewable energy solutions to developing countries, significantly impacting global sustainability efforts.

👥

Uranus in Aquarius in 11th house

Your social circle consists of unconventional, forward-thinking individuals who share your progressive ideals.

Friendships can be revolutionary in nature.

Mutual support in personal growth can be extremely important to you.

You are drawn to social causes and community projects that involve innovation and aim to create significant societal change.

Your social circle is likely to be tech-savvy and forward-thinking, often consisting of individuals who share your interest in innovation and progress.

You may form friendships through online communities, social media, or tech meetups rather than traditional settings.

Social dynamics in your friendships and groups can be unpredictable, with sudden changes in alliances or group structures.

You are drawn to community projects that involve innovation and forward-thinking solutions to social issues.

🌌

Uranus in Aquarius in 12th house

Interest in unconventional healing practices and psychological exploration, often involving alternative methods.

You might have hidden eccentricities or secret interests that you prefer to keep private, only sharing with a select few who understand your unconventional nature.

Your dreams and unconscious mind are a source of innovative ideas and insights, often ahead of their time.

Your innovative and rebellious ideas might be kept hidden or operate behind the scenes, influencing events in subtle and unexpected ways. For example, being a silent partner in revolutionary social movements.

You may experience sudden and profound spiritual insights that transform your understanding of the unseen and mystical aspects of life.

An interest in unconventional healing methods, such as energy healing, quantum healing, or using technology for spiritual and psychological wellness.

Your subconscious mind might harbor disruptive or rebellious patterns that surface unexpectedly, leading to periods of inner turmoil and transformation.

There can be a revolutionary approach to compassion and humanitarian efforts, often working behind the scenes to support radical social change.

[mistydeyes]

141 and what their patient file looks like

┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊

summary: This is what I imagine everyone's favorite pharmacist as well as medics see when they look at 141's medical file.

Based on this pharmacist and 141 interactions

pairing: Task Force 141 x pharmacist!Reader

warnings: medical/pharmacy terminology, medical inaccuracies, swearing, depiction of wounds, mention of substance use disorder and abuse

Terms

PMH - Past medical history - the total sum of a patient's health status prior to the presenting problem

FH - Family history - contributing family history, generally parents and siblings

SH - Social history - contributing social behavior and routine

a/n: not canon at all! this is just a reference for me

┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊

Price

PMH

Height: 1.88 m (6' 2'')

Weight: 93 kg (205 lbs)

Blood type: O+

Extensive physical injuries

21+ stab wounds - 2 required antibiotics for recurrent infection

9x bullet wound - 5x in the extremities, 4x in the chest (no perforation of vital organs), healed without complication

5x abrasion collar - 1 near right eyebrow became infected following medical eval and stitches

3x diagnosed concussion

Aspirin-sensitivity

Previously evaluated for tinnitus and hearing loss

FH

Father - deceased at 76 from liver disease - 50 pack years, mycardial infarction (x2)

Mother - deceased at 84 due to chronic heart failure (CHF) -Glaucoma, asthma, CHF

Sister - Sports induced asthma, hypothyroidism

Negative family history of diabetes, hypertension, and cancer

SH

Smokes - 30 pack years

Drinks regularly - 4-5 hard liquor each weekend; 1 glass of whiskey occasionally

Physically active - Enjoys recreational activities such as hiking, swimming, and biking

Has 1 dog, currently under the care of pt's younger sister

History of monogynous long term relationships, currently single

Medication list + indications

Amoxicillin/Clavulanic acid 625mg - Infection

Morphine 15mg + Ketamine 3mg - IV - Pain

Paracetamol 750mg - Pain

Buproprion SR 150mg - Smoking cessation - not-taking est 2004

Allergies

Aspirin allergy - Reaction: hives and asthma - ONLY PRESCRIBE PARACETAMOL

No environmental, food, or animal allergies

Notes

Patient has denied smoking cessation options

Soap

PMH

Height: 1.88 m (6' 2'')

Weight: 91 kg (200 lbs)

Blood type: O+

7x stab wound - 6 required antibiotics for recurrent infection, 2 MRSA resistant

2x bullet wound - 2x in lower extremities, healed with no complication

6x abrasion collar

2x broken collar bone - healed, with no complication

Lactose sensitivity - Recurrent IBS if ingested

Chipped first left molar following opening a beer with teeth

FH

Father deceased at 68 due to heart failure - Type 2 Diabetes Mellitus, high cholesterol

Mother - Stage I HTN (hypertension)

Sister #1 - Postpartum depression, generalized anxiety disorder

Sister #2 - Elevated cholesterol/triglycerides

Brother - No known chronic health issues

Positive family history of diabetes and hypertension, but no cancer

SH

Drinks regularly and heavily - 8-12 beers and 2-3 glasses of hard liquor each weekend; 1 glass of scotch occasionally

Smokes socially - 5 pack years

Physically active

Close relationship with family, has 4 dogs at home under the care of pt's mothers

Avid fan of The Glasgow Football Club

Medication list + indications

Clindamycin 300mg with ciprofloxacin 400mg - Infection

Amoxicillin/Clauvanic acid 625mg - Infection

Vancomycin 18mg/kg - MRSA resistant infection

Paracetamol 500mg - Pain

Morphine 15mg IV - Pain

Doxycycline 100mg - Acne discontinued in 2004

Allergies

Insect stings - Observed anaphylaxis to childhood bee sting

Notes

Patient demonstrates medication non-adherence, counsel ESPECIALLY with antibiotics

Scored 6 on Alcohol use disorders identification test for consumption (AUDIT C)

Gaz

PMH

Height: 1.86 m (6' 1'')

Weight: 93 kg (205 lbs)

Blood type: B-

3x stab wound - healed, no complications

1x broken collar bone

2x broken femur

Diagnosed concussion - evaluated in Oct. '19

FH

Father - Type 1 Diabetes, high cholesterol

Mother - Vitiligo, Stage 3 breast cancer

Positive family history of maternal cancer and diabetes, but no hypertension

SH

Social drinker - 3-4 beers each weekend

Does not smoke

Physically active - Enjoys morning and evening runs

Enjoys spicy food and tries to introduce into diet

When on leave, enjoys attending concerts and music festivals

Medication list + indications

Piriteze 10mg - Allergic rhinitis

Fluticasone Propionate - 93 mcg/actuation - Allergic rhinitis

Paracetamol 500mg - Pain

Allergies

Seasonal - Pollen and pet dander

β-Lactam allergy - Reaction: anaphylaxis evaluated in '19

Notes

Organ donor

Ghost

PMH

Height: Weight: 1.93 m (6' 4'')

WeighT: 100 kg (220 lbs)

Blood type: AB-

Extensive cuts and scarring to entire body

4+ stab wounds - healed, no complications

Gun shot to lower abdomen - healed, no complications, evaluated in Nov. '22

13+ collar abrasion

2x broken nose

Childhood injury of broken tibia and large toe

Psych eval - History of depression and post traumatic stress disorder, childhood history indicates emotional and physical abuse

FH

Father - status unknown Diagnosed alcohol use disorder

Brother - deceased, cause of death non-contributory - Substance use disorder

Mother - deceased, cause of death non-contributory - Hypertension, thrombophilia (blood clotting disorder)

Positive family history of hypertension, but no diabetes or cancer

SH

Social drinker - 3-4 glasses of hard liquor each weekend

Smokes socially - 10 pack years

Physically active - Enjoys nightly walks

Psych eval - Other squad members act as his emotional support

Expressed interest in cats and tattoo art (FLAGGED: Further input and comments from other medical professionals would be appreciated)

Medication list + indications

Paracetamol 1000mg - Pain

Amoxicillin/Clavulanic acid 625mg - Infection

Morphine 20mg + Ketamine 4.5mg IV - Pain

Mafenide acetate 5% topical - Antimicrobial, burn wounds

Fluoxetine 20mg twice daily - Depression - not taking est 2001

Allergies

NKDA - No known drug allergies

No environmental, food, or animal allergies

Psych recommends evaluation of a pet, such as cat, for pt while on leave

┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊ ⋆ ┊ . ┊ ┊┊

[karlachismylife]

Totally self indulgent but how would they help take care of a chronically ill partner? (Poly if you don't mind)

((also yes I am having a bad day))

I'm so sorry to hear you're having a bad day, baby, I wish I could be there to help you through it :( These speedrun headcanons just for you are the least I could do, of course. I tried to keep it general enough without making it about any particular disease, because at the end of the day, whatever you're going through, they will be there for you no matter what.

CW: gn!reader with unspecified chronic illness, thus mentions of medical themes, medications, treatments, doctors and some things our bodies go through, symptoms and such. Also some controlling/soft dom/caretaker behaviour I guess, but without dabbling into CGL territory. Last paragraph is suggestive, but not explicit.

So, with any chronic disease, there are better days and worse days, ups and downs, and sometimes bad days happen unpredictably, sometimes you can kinda feel them coming, sometimes you just know that whatever you just did, be it going out all night for the concert of your favourite music band or just spoiling yourself with food you know will fuck you up but tastes too good to pass - and throughout all that your four partners stay attentive and vigilant.

Each and every one of them (even Soap, however unlikely) knows the importance of routine. They're military, they have no problem adhering to the same set of regular actions - as well as reacting to sudden changes and giving immediate appropriate response. Honestly, they're pretty damn good as caretakers, once they get clear in structions on what needs to be done.

Price goes with you to doctor appointments and all the treatment you need outside home. He's driving you there, waiting at the door (maybe eavesdropping while he pretends to fall asleep in the uncomfortable chair with his chin tucked and his hat laying in his lap. maybe actually falling asleep and waking up with horrifying neck cracking), asking a hundred questions after the doctor lets you out - to the point where it starts to look more like an interrogation. He does want to know everything, though, since only with full information on hands he can assess the situation and work out a plan of action. He wants to know what's the status, what meds you need to take and for what, how often, what side effects are possible, what else needs to be done - he makes your doctor give him a full on lecture, even if you already explaind half of that to them all previously. After he gets what he wanted from the poor medic, he still pulls on some strings to get you seen by specialists he's confident in. Sure, your doc might've been treating you for god knows how long, but a second (a third and maybe even fourth) opinion won't hurt, right?

Ghost gets your (and everyone else's, because Price fucked up his joints and spine more times than it's acceptable, Gaz has allergies and Soap needs his adderall. Ghost himself takes half of the pharmacy's supply, poor guy's messed up in all kinds of way) meds and also makes sure you and the boys take them regularly, especially if they're the type to be taken strictly on time. He brings your morning pills to you in bed with water and a little sandwich if you need to take them not on empty stomach, and if he has to be out at the time you need them, he always sends you a reminder - and expects you to report to him quickly, otherwise he's calling you and then one of the guys that can come and make sure you're being good. If you're having a bad head day and can't make yourself take these fucking pills that can't even "fix" you (or whatever bad thoughts you're having), Simon's going extremely soft - he just sits next to you and feeds you one pill after another, kissing you for every one you swallow, and then does same with his stash, "demanding" rewarding kisses from you with an adorably serious face. He knows better than anyone how much needing to do this every damn day can fuck with your mind, so he's patient, but he can't let you neglect yourself.

(Soap gets no such treatment, if that little shit tries to wiggle his way out of taking his meds, they get shoved into his mouth. He still gets his rewarding kiss, though, with Ghost's steel grip on his jaw, and this honestly looks like Simon tries to kill him via sucking his internal organs out of his mouth. Mind end up sucking something else-)

Gaz is just steadily making everything he can as accomodating as possible. If your headaches make you sensitive to smells, he makes sure nothing in the house can cause a bad reaction, he watches everyone's allergies, buys groceries to fit your diet and makes sure other products like soap or cleaning supplies won't be bad to you. He's the one who will find non-constraining clothes out of fabric that won't irritate your body - very stylish and just how you lik them, he's looking into furniture and appliances that can make it easier to deal with if you're in pain or can't hold shit properly because of joint pain (not only for you, Price and Ghost both get days when their knuckles hurt LIKE HELL). He might've had experience caring for a relative, or maybe he's just extremely good at research, but he just comes up with solutions you didn't even know could help.

Soap is the service dog. He's ready to run any errand, pick up every task you give him, provide immediate help as soon as you call for him. He's cuddling you through flares, fetching blankets or tea, literally catching you if you suddenly get a horrible cramp and fold in half. This man will go to the bathroom with you and keep you steady while you throw up, or literally kneel on the tile floor and wipe your tears if you get really bad bowel problems. He's seen people get shredded into pieces and watched their internal organs become external, he won't be put off by anything a human body can do. None of them will, to be honest, but Soap is just always the first to hold your hand through whatever hell you're going through.

But the other thing Soap does - is make you feel normal. He's not tiptoeing around you, treating you like a fragile doll that can't be played with, no; he'll fucking prank you, tease you, rile you up and haunt you as long as it makes you smile and helps you forget about that thing that impacts you every day while other people get to live without it. He's your personal hospital clown, and honestly, if you need to go to hospital, he might actually sneak inside in a clown costume (how the fuck did no one see and stop a huge ass man with a honking red nose and rainbow onesie walking through the corridors?) and entertain you. His family never let him feel like he was different despite the obvious struggles he faced with his ADHD (that wasn't diagnosed straight away too and went unmedicated for quite some time), and he'd rather die than let you feel like you're missing out on all the fun life has to offer because some days you can't even leave your bed as your body acts out.

They watch your diet and find ways to make it as diverse as possible, no matter how limited it is. Gaz is the one who makes groceries lists and often goes shopping, but all four of them take turns cooking (a man's place is in the kitchen, even if it gets cramped with all four of these dudes there) and experimenting with food. Gaz is the best cook by far, and the second to best is surprisingly Soap! Price actually isn't all that inventive in the kitchen (he just knows what he likes and doesn't venture out much, but what he does he does well), and Ghost... his main culinary innovations are in the stupid smiley faces and skulls he makes out of everything. How did he manage that with soup? I dunno, ask him.

They know your patterns and habits, sometimes they can tell the illness will flare before even you do, from the subtle changes in your appearance or behaviour. Maybe you're sweating just a little too much today and Gaz saw the stains on your shirt while doing the laundry, or your heartrate is off under Ghost's sharp ear as he nestles into his favourite place in the world - your arms. Perhaps Price noticed you ate not enough of your breakfast or Soap grabs your hand and feels it's colder than should be.

First thing they do is check in with you - Ghost is extremely straightforward and demanding about it, making you recite what you did recently that could cause a flare and asking you all about how you're feeling; Soap slips into worry immediately and starts with a question what he can do for you. Gaz goes a sly route, tugging you away from whatever you were doing, snuggling with you on the bed or the couch and peppering you with kisses, purring into your ear sweet nothings mixed with questions until he coaxes all the information from you. Price doesn't even ask at first: he immediately goes into action, the most basic care provided before he even says anything.

They do listen to you, though. If you're not feeling the worst and don't need immediate help, they just stay around to watch after you, but always communicate to others that extra care might come in handy today. Probably still try to convince you to go easy with your tasks, be it studying, work or chores, and help with whatever they can.

However, if it is bad, you kinda lose autonomy. Work? Forget about it. Chores are on them for the next week, no exceptions. You're lifted off your feet and brought to bed by Soap, everything arranged into a comfortable way by Gaz by the time they carefully lower you there. If you need to sit up to lessen the symptoms, they put pillows behind your back, but Soap prefers when he can cradle you against his chest and serve as a heat pillow himself - especially if his hot hands can make tummy or joint pain better. But if heat is the thing you don't need at all, he'll stay next to you, ready to jump at your first word.

Meds and water in Ghost's hand, waiting for you to take them patiently. While Price takes care of your unfinished business (and makes sure you won't go to work/school/uni next few days), Gaz ensures your body is taken care of - maybe you need a gentle massage or just sweat and teares wiped off, he's there, cooing at you and kissing your skin gently.

If you need bathroom, you're getting carried there, but if it's just to throw up, Soap's already got a bucket at the ready, and he and Gaz will support your body through the nausea, another glass of water appearing with silent Ghost by the end of it.

You're getting all the entertainment you want: Gaz and Soap will only be happy if you want to play computer games with them (or, if you can't, you can just watch them, and they'll goof around to keep your mind off your state). You want to continue that book you're reading, but it's hard to hold it and your eyes hurt? No audiobooks while you have Price there, he'll read you aloud. A movie? Hell yeah they'll all gather around with whatever snacks you can digest at the moment and watch whatever you want (and if Ghost or Price fall asleep, you can prank them via Sergeants' proxy).

Some other little things:

They all either quit smoking or make sure it doesn't affect you even with the smell.

Price keeps on top of all your vaccines and screenings. Don't even need to remember them, he can wake up in the middle of the night and recite all of the needed information. Can get quite strict and controlling if you try to get out of appointments - and also spends almost unhealthy amount of time reseatching what else can be done, including trying all kinds of experimental treatments and some not even fully scientific ones (like acupuncture. who fucking knows, eh?)

Ghost is the best out of all of your men to confide in when the illness takes toll on your mental health. He knows what drowning in your mind feels like, and he'll be there to reach out a hand and keep you afloat. He's actually good with words on these topics, and his voice grounds you - but if you need silent companionship or a firm chest to sob into, he can provide that too.

Soap actually often gets angry about your condition - not at you, of course, but the sheer unfairness of his beloved person suffering with no end, no matter how much all four boys do for you, weighs on him. The others might have caught him actually crying in the middle of letting steam off in the gym, he hates being powerless against a fucking disease.

Gaz loves when you let him take care of your body and appearance. Be it simply helping you take a bath/shower, shaving if you want but can't manage, brushing your hair for you, massaging oils, lotions or ointments into your skin... if you feel self-conscious about your appearance on flare days, he will obviously reassure you with other boys (as if they wouldn't love you in any condition, for fuck's sake, they're here because you make them feel the happiest they've ever been, not because you look like a model 24/7), but if it will make you feel better, he'll help you with a nice hairdo that won't burden your scalp, dress you up prettily, helping you put on every clothing piece with reverent kisses along the way, and do your makeup if you do it. Will he join you in all that and get all pretty too? Hell yeah! Might even catch Soap and get him dolled up too.

And finally, you won't find more accommodating people for intimacy. Whatever your limits are, they're never crossing them, choosing positions you won't feel uncomfortable in, being careful not to overwhelm you, discussing everything you want to try in sex with possible complications in mind. They're fine not doing anything at all; they're fine with doing no penetration; they're fine with extensive foreplay... definitely using all kinds of devices to make the experience better for you. Potentially asking your doctor questions on what's okay and what's not, even if you're screaming not to, lol.

They just love you, and they're ready to take everything off your shoulders as soon as you need it.

Hope you feel better soon, lovie <3

[sgstories123]

Eliza's Cruise Adventure

“Can we buy you a drink, miss?”

Eliza looked up at the three men. They were wearing board shorts of loud, gaudy colours. All were topless, showing off their tanned, muscular bodies and chiseled abs. These young punks were most probably in their twenties, thought Eliza.

“Well, if you can get me a Passion Spritz, that will be nice.” Eliza smiled. She had never said no to free drinks. She let her robe slid off a little further, giving the men a good look of her pink bikini-clad body. She was aware that her mum who was lying on the reclining next to her was giving her a disapproving look. But Eliza is no longer a little girl who needed her mother’s approval.

Eliza had worked hard all her life. Ever since her father left her mother to be with his mistress in China, she had decided that she will need to study hard and earn a good living. If nothing else, to show that useless father of hers the good life that he is missing when he made the decision to leave them. She did well in school and earn several scholarships to ease the financial burden on her mother. When she was in her first year in NUS Medicine school, she met a rich and handsome classmate which eventually became her boyfriend. She thought her life had turned for the better but alas, her boyfriend cheated on her just months after she had given her virginity to him. She broke up with him immediately and swore never to depend on any men. When she completed her medical degree, she worked hard at her job in NUH, rising quickly through the ranks. With her career stabilising and a high income, she bought a condominium in the western part of Singapore to live with her mom, fulfilling her promise as a young child to give her mother a good life. True to her words, she never had a boyfriend since her university days. She spends all her free time with her mother, eating at restaurants and going on holidays. And here they are now, on a 4 night Royal Caribbean cruise to Jeju Island in Korea.

Although Eliza is now in her thirties, she had taken good care of her body. Her skin was still flawless and her strict adherence to a diet and Yogo routine helped her body stay slim and youthful. It was no wonder that many men at the swimming pool were ogling at her when she walked past in her pink bikini. Eliza may have sworn off men but she enjoyed the stares of appreciation that she was getting from men. Men are so useless. They only think with their dicks. Eliza smirked as she put on the white bathrobe from the cruise liner. It was not out of modesty but instead, it was a calculated move on her part to cover parts of her body, to make it more mysterious and seductive.

The three men soon returned with her vodka cocktail. They purposefully sat on her seat and tried to touch her. But Eliza was too smart for them. She wrapped herself tightly in her bathrobe and the men could not touch her bare skin. She soon found out that Ahmad, Beng and Chandra were classmates at NUS and had just started work. They decided to take a cruise together with their first year-end bonus as a sort of celebration. Perhaps they thought she could be a memento of their trip, Eliza smirked to herself. Young punks. She will squeeze them dry of their bonus and leave them high and dry. The men continue to talk to her and she encouraged them by revealing parts of her body but never letting them touch her. Throughout, she continued to ask them for drinks and snacks. She even got one of them to buy her a pair of Gucci shades. By the evening, she realised that she had enjoyed the attention so much that she had been a little reluctant to leave the pool for her dinner. The men wanted to follow her but she skilfully evade them.

She went to Jamie’s for dinner with her mother. Throughout, her mother was nagging at her over her spaghetti on how she was being overly flirtatious and how she will regret her actions. Eliza was bored. She did not blame her mother but her mother was really too conservative. It was all fun and nothing else. If men can flirt with women, why can’t women flirt with men?

To avoid further nagging, Eliza went down to the bar and left her mother to return to their room. She was wearing a purple long dress with a low neckline, showing off the cleavage to her ample breasts. She was pleased that her choice of dress drew appreciative stares from the men when she walked into the bar. As she sat at the counter, the three men that she saw earlier plonked themselves on the seats beside her. She was pleasantly surprised to see them again. To be honest, they were good conservationist and were good looking. Ahmad had a boyish looking face and a nice brown tan. Beng had a muscular broad chest that exuded masculinity. Chandra was the most average looking of the three men but he sported a large, angular nose. Supposedly, this was the mark of a large cock. Eliza laughed to herself. She had not seen any medical reports on this yet and wondered how this myth became popular.

“Any of you want to buy me a drink?” Eliza purred seductively. The three men rushed to be the first to buy her a drink and other refreshments. Several hours later, Eliza realised perhaps a bit belatedly that she was getting drunk. She usually knew when to stop but she must have missed that point with the engaging conversations and the never ending flow of drinks. She blamed her mother momentarily. Maybe she drank too much because she was pissed with her mother’s nagging.

“I need to go.” Eliza stood up resolutely but faltered straightaway, holding onto the bar counter for support. “Come on, let’s have another one.” Ahmad suggested.

“The night is still young.” Beng argued.

“Or do you want to come to our room for another round.” Chandra said with a twinkle in his eye.

“No. I am going up to my room.” Eliza knew that she must not drink any more.

She walked a few tentative steps but stumbled forward on her fourth step. Ahmad and Beng ran forward and each held one of her arms. “Thanks.” Eliza muttered, her world spinning crazily around her.

“Let’s go to our room.” Chandra urged.

“No. I want to go back to my room 1120.” Eliza stated as firmly as she could. She looked at the bartender, who was looking at her direction. “I want to go back to my room 1120.” She repeated loudly, making sure that the bartender heard her. These young men would not want to try anything funny now that the bartender is aware that she does not want to be in their room. Eliza smiled to herself. Still smarter than you guys who think with their dicks, assholes.

The three men brought Eliza to her room. She was still too weak to stand on her feet and was half-dragged to her room, stumbling along the way. They met several people along the corridors and Eliza made sure that they knew that she was heading back to her room. “These men are bringing me back to my room 1120.” She repeated loudly whenever she saw anyone along the corridors. It was embarrassing to be that drunk but it was important to draw attention to herself, Eliza rationalised.

Once the door to her room was opened, the three men dropped her on the bed. Eliza fell asleep immediately when she realised that she was safe in her room and her defences dropped. Chandra closed the door behind them and smiled at Ahmad and Beng knowingly. Their plan to make Eliza drunk and then fuck her had worked. Well, almost. They had planned to bring her to their room but the venue was not the most important thing, was it?

“Eliza, you back?” Eliza’s mother called out from the toilet. The three men froze, looking at each other. Shit. They forgot about the mother. Beng looked around and pulled off two pillow cases. He motioned the other two to stand with him behind the toilet door. The toilet door opened and Eliza’s mother walked out in her bathrobe.

“Eliza? Are you okay?” Eliza’s mother asked, drying her hair with a towel in her hand. Beng pushed Eliza’s mother down onto the bed and sat on top of her. He pulled her hands behind her and tied them with one of the pillow cases. Eliza’s mother screamed and Beng quickly took the towel and stuff it into her mouth, muffling her screams. Ahmad took the remaining pillow case and tied Eliza’s mother’s legs to stop her from kicking and struggling. Secured, the three men carried Eliza’s mother to the sofa.

“Well, there were a few hiccups but I guess it was almost as easy as ABC, huh? Shall we begin?” Ahmad rubbed his hands gleefully.

“This bitch is really too much. It is payback time for all the money we spent on her.” Beng laughed.

Chandra did not even bother saying anything as he simply smiled and undressed himself. The other two men followed his cue and undressed themselves too. They quickly removed Eliza’s dress, revealing the twin mounds of flesh. Despite her age, Eliza’s breasts were still perky and firm. The men took turns squeezing them and sucking on her nipples. Eliza moaned in her sleep and the men seemed to be even more excited when they heard her.

“Fuck! She trimmed herself down there. She like some fucking schoolgirl.” Ahmad exclaimed as he positioned his head between her legs. He licked her love hole as he brushed his fingers against the thin pubic hair. He slowly peeled the folds of her love hole open carefully, taking in the sweet smell emanating from her vagina. He found the small bud of pleasure and carefully licked it.

Eliza opened her mouth and moaned softly as pleasure coursed through her body. Beng took the opportunity to thrust his manhood into her mouth. He could feel his hard cock reaching the back of her throat. He pulled Eliza’s head over the edge of the bed. Eliza’s head now tilted backwards and allowed his cock to reach even deeper. “Fuck! Her mouth feels damn good.”

Chandra straddled Eliza and rubbed his hard cock between her breasts. He closed his eyes and moaned softly as his cock coursed through the smooth valley.

By this time, Ahmad decided that Eliza was sufficiently lubricated. He spat a glob of saliva onto his hard cock and guided it slowly into her. “Fuck. This bitch is so tight, like a goddamn school girl.”

Chandra laughed when he heard that. He turned around and helped spread Eliza’s legs wider. 

Ahmad thrusted hard and finally got his cock totally in her. It was so tight and pleasurable that he could not stop himself from ejaculating after only several thrusts. “Shit! What a waste!”

Chandra laughed again. “Weak! My turn!” Ahmad relented and Chandra took over his position. Chandra’s cock was even larger and thicker than Ahmad’s. It will be even more difficult to get his cock into Eliza’s tight cunt but Ahmad had lubricated Eliza’s hole well with her love juice and his semen. Slowly, Chandra eased his cock into Eliza, stretching her tight hole that has not been used in years to her limit. The pain shot through Eliza and she woke up with a start. The first thing she saw were Beng’s balls swinging in front of her and her mouth being violated by his cock.

“Mmph!” She tried to push Beng away but Chandra had now pushed the last two inches of his large cock into her, going where no cock had ever gone before. Pain paralysed her, followed by blinding pleasure. Instead of pushing Beng away, her hands grabbed his ass and pulled him even deeper into her mouth. Beng groaned in pleasure as he went deeper, the pleasure from his cock finally tipping him over the abyss. He shot out white waves of little Bengs, flooding Eliza’s mouth and bathing his cock in them.

Eliza was choking on Beng’s ejaculate. She tried to push him away but was too weak. Left with no choice, she swallowed his man juice as much as she could, but there was too much and some even went into her nose.

While Beng and Chandra were fucking Eliza, Ahmad had sat himself next to Eliza’s mom. He had been stroking his cock to hardness while watching his friends enjoying themselves with Eliza when he realised that Eliza’s mom was staring hard at her daughter being fucked.

“You like what you see, huh? Are you an old horny cow, huh?” Ahmad jeered. He pulled open her bathrobe and was pleasantly surprised that the older woman had even larger breasts than her daughter. The skin was still soft and smooth. He bent forwards to suck her tits as he stroked himself. His cock hardened as his body touched the older woman’s bare skin.

Aroused, he took an irrational risk. He removed the towel from the older woman’s mouth and stood on the sofa, positioning his hard cock in front of the older woman.

“Suck it, old cow!” The older woman complied, sucking his cock hungrily.

“Look guys! The old cow is horny!” Ahmad laughed. “God! She still has the skills. Damn it. She is good!” Ahmad groaned in pleasure as he started fucking the older woman’s mouth.

Beng walked over and untied the woman’s legs. He spread it open and started licking her cunt. The older woman moaned in pleasure, Ahmad’s cock still in her mouth.

By this time, Chandra had been enjoying fucking Eliza for some time now. He gave several deep and slow strokes, before finishing with a series of quick thrusts. Eliza’s love canal was flooded a second time after more than a decade of drought. As Chandra withdrew his cock, he was pleased to see the white man juice slowly seeping out of Eliza’s cunt. That was so erotic and made him feel that he had successfully conquered that proud bitch.

Eliza was feeling confused. She was conscious now. She knew she should be frightened by what had just happened but instead she she wanted more. It had been so long since she had sex and they had made her feel so much more pleasure than her boyfriend so many years ago.

“What? What are you staring at, bitch?” Chandra saw a confused look on Eliza’s face. Eliza looked away and was drawn to Chandra’s large, black, hairy cock. Maybe there is some truth to the myth. That was a huge cock. Did it actually went in her? Unbelievable.

Chandra saw Eliza looking at his cock. His cock hardened again. He smiled to himself. “You want some more of my cock, bitch?”

“You are not strong enough. Weak bastards that think with your dicks? You can’t even last long enough to pleasure me, assholes.” Eliza retorted without thinking. The rebellious streak in her took over.

Chandra saw red and pulled Eliza towards him. Her legs were now over the edge of the bed while her back was on the bed. He turned her over, spreading her legs wide and without any warning, forced his cock into her, impaling his whole length in one deep stroker. Eliza screamed as pain tore through her. She was still not accustomed to such a big cock in her. Chandra pulled her hair and forced her body to arch against his. This only caused his cock to slide even further in, eliciting pain and pleasure all over Eliza’s body. Eliza willed herself not to blackout. Chandra tilted her head towards his. “Not strong enough? I will make you come so much that you will beg me to stop, bitch.” Chandra grunted as he pumped deeper and faster into Eliza. Minutes later, he seeded Eliza again, with semen dripping out of her cunt, a long white river along the length of her legs.

Ahmad saw what was happening and took his cock out of the older women’s mouth. He walked over to the bed where Eliza was now lying flat on her back, exhausted. He spread her legs wide, sticking his hard cock covered with Eliza’s mother’s saliva into Eliza’s cunt. This time, it went in easily. He pulled Eliza up so that she was now sitting on his cock. He sank his head into her breasts, sucking on them slowly. The first time was too quick for him. Now, he intends to savour Eliza. As Eliza bounced slowly on his cock, she started moaning in pleasure as the slow love-making generated gentle waves of pleasure.

“Look at her!. She enjoying being fucked. What a bitch!” Chandra sneered. His cock twitched and blood starting flowing into it again. He pushed both Eliza and Ahmad down onto the bed, straddled Ahmad’s legs, positioning himself behind Eliza’s ass.

“Fuck, Chandra! What you doing, huh?” Ahmad sounded a bit piss at having his pleasure disrupted.

“I want to fuck her in her asshole. Give that bitch two cocks at the same time.” Chandra spit on his fingers and inserted them into Eliza’s asshole. Eliza froze at the unfamiliar intrusion but Chandra was impatient. He quickly inserted a second finger, trying to loosen it as much as he can. Eliza winced in pain but that only encouraged Chandra’s sadistic instinct. He pushed his cock into Eliza’s ass, forcing it against the muscles in her opening. Eliza screamed, her whole body reacting to the unnatural forced entry. Ahmad groaned in pleasure as the muscles squeezed his cock even tighter. Chandra did not care and forced his cock even deeper. Eventually, Eliza had both cocks deep in her. Chandra pushed himself against Eliza, the movement causing Eliza pleasure in both her holes. She moaned louder and louder in pleasure, unable to control herself.

Beng was amused at his two friends fucking Eliza. But he had no intention of joining them. Having his cock coated in another man’s semen seemed disgusting. Anyway, now that Ahmad had done a good job lubricating the old cow, he decided to fuck the old woman instead. He lifted her legs over his shoulders and fucked her on the sofa standing up. It was not tight as to be expected, but a cunt is a cunt. It was still warm and pleasurable and the old woman seemed appreciative of having a fuck at this age. She was moaning softly, seemingly enjoying herself.

The three men continued fucking for a while and ejaculated for the final time. Dressing quickly, the three men looked at the two women, covered in semen, exhausted. They laughed and exited the room quietly. It was already morning. The ship had docked and they should quickly leave the boat before the women wake up.

[haggishlyhagging]

So I'd like to shift my critical gaze for just a moment to focus on the institution of western medicine. Let's remember that men founded it, with the help of the Catholic Church, by torturing and murdering millions of women practicing indigenous health care in Europe during the women's holocaust, the Burning Times. (Indigenous systems of health care around the world are still being destroyed today and replaced by systems based on the consumptive western model.) These self-styled doctors consolidated their power by denying women access to medical education, while making medical education a prerequisite for the practice of health care. Since then, among other things, medical men have pathologized (in order to "treat" and control) the natural body experiences of womanhood—menarche, menstruation, pregnancy/childbirth and menopause. They cut out our clitorises if we showed too much interest in sex and locked us in mental institutions when our husbands wanted control of our property. They prescribed us, our mothers or grandmothers the dalkon shield, thalidomide, diethyl-stilbestrol, silicone breast implants, and hormone replacement therapy by the millions. They sterilized thousands of women without their consent. They perform "medical research" on people in prison or mental hospitals without their consent. For a hefty fee, they are happy to surgically remove a chunk of nose, breasts, or stomach so we can better fit the cultural beauty imperative of the moment. They capitalize on the confusion of women who don't fit the "feminine" stereotype, handing out a convenient diagnosis, bilateral mastectomies and a lifetime prescription for testosterone. They routinely announce discoveries about "human" health based on studies with only male subjects. They believe the despair and rage of women who have been raped, sexually abused, battered or just overworked are appropriately and sufficiently addressed with Prozac. They cannot conceive of a woman collecting information, interpreting it, and coming to a conclusion different from theirs; the only word in their vocabulary for a patient who does not follow a doctor's advice is "noncompliant." In short, this system and its adherents are not on the side of women.

-Amy Winter, “Women, Health, and the Politics of Fat” in Rain and Thunder, Autumn Equinox 2003

[howlsofbloodhounds]

I just got the image of Stage 4 feeling directionless after Killer escaped with Color and starting to hear Chara less and less as therapy and medicine start helping and it desperately making a shrine to Chara, putting everything it can in it (the knife that Killer gifted them once, the heart locket, some of its black goop etc).

Just, can you imagine how traumatic it would be for it if it felt that connection starting to disappear? How desperate it might become to get it back?

Stage 4 wasn't built to be independent. It wasn't built to live an easy life and be led by a gentle hand. It was built to follow Chara's directive. It may at times take on other owners, but Chara will forever be its primary one. < That's how it thinks at least...

I’d imagine this is probably the first time anyone actually gets to seeing it cry. Genuinely cry, perhaps even a full breakdown, jerky movements and stuttering disjointed confused speech.

I’d imagine it feels like abandonment, failure, rejection, punishment. It may start rejecting and forcing itself to throw up medication, viewing the meds and those giving them to it as the enemy deliberately trying to sabotage it and Chara; trying to take away the only form of structure and certainty it has ever known. It’s the equivalent of taking a child away from its mother kicking and screaming.

It may start to resort to self harm and punishment as a form of repentance, and may start to lose its grasp on reality— believing even small and seemingly insignificant things are signs from Chara trying to communicate to it.

As a coping mechanism, Stage 4 could double down on the aspects of The Directive it still remembers or perceives, obsessively adhering to past commands or missions.

It could become hyper-focused on its assigned objectives, even without new input from Chara, hoping that by over performing, the connection will return.

This could result in overzealous behavior, such as becoming extremely aggressive in missions or going to extreme lengths to accomplish goals.

Or, in this case, would likely mean having to be to put on some type of protective security watch for itself and others— which means unable to perform the big aspects of the Directive, and would probably excessively perform any routine tasks and rituals Chara used to have Killer do or any that Stage 4 developed to cope.

It may begin to believe that it is no longer useful or that Chara is punishing it for some failure. This fear would lead to heightened anxiety, where it becomes desperate to “prove” its worth to Chara, even if Chara’s commands are no longer clear.

As Chara’s voice fades, Stage 4 could begin to experience emotions it has suppressed for a long time. The fading connection could trigger feelings of loss, fear, and even grief over what it perceives as the disintegration of its core identity.

However, Stage 4 would not know how to process these emotions, given its rigid focus on tasks and obedience, leading to emotional outbursts and erratic behavior.

Stage 4 would feel increasingly panicked as Chara’s voice becomes harder to hear, triggering behaviors that are more frantic and desperate.

It might obsessively search for ways to regain the connection, trying to hear Chara by retracing its steps, engaging in rituals tied to Chara, or reenacting old commands to try to rekindle the bond.

Stage 4 might engage in extreme behavior to try to reestablish the connection. It may return to dangerous, self-harming, or punishing behaviors in the belief that pain or punishment will help Chara’s voice return, thinking that it must prove its loyalty and obedience through suffering.

When the loss of Chara’s voice becomes unbearable, Stage 4 might begin to hallucinate Chara’s voice, constructing a false sense of connection.

This might show itself as delusional beliefs that Chara is still speaking through other means, such as signs, objects, or cryptic symbols. In its desperation, Stage 4 could start interpreting random events as KC’s way of communicating, further distorting its perception of reality.

Stage 4 would begin to feel as though it is losing its sense of self. Given how much of Stage 4’s identity is tied to obedience and KC’s authority, the loss of this voice could create a sense of identity fragmentation.

It would not know who or what it is without KC’s constant guidance, leading to disorientation and confusion about its place in the world.

Without KC’s clear commands, Stage 4 could start to malfunction or behave erratically, unable to operate with the same precision or efficiency. It may become disorganized, acting out of impulse or reflex rather than carefully following a plan, leading to more chaotic or dangerous behavior.

In the absence of KC, Stage 4 could become more clingy toward those who represent stability or structure in its life, such as Color.

It may seek reassurance from Color or others that it is still fulfilling its purpose, even if it no longer knows what that purpose is. However, this dependence could be unstable, with Stage 4 constantly fearing that these figures will also abandon it.

As the connection to KC fades, Stage 4 may start to question the validity of The Directive itself. It might, for the first time, experience moments of doubt about whether the goals it has been pursuing are still valid.

That could create an internal struggle, as Stage 4 begins to consider whether it needs to forge a new path or find new meaning, though this would likely be a terrifying and confusing process for it.

Without the guiding voice of KC, Stage 4 would experience a complete loss of motivation. If it can no longer hear KC, it might feel that nothing matters anymore, leading to apathy or a sense of purposelessness. This could manifest as periods of emotional numbness, where Stage 4 feels it no longer has any reason to act or pursue its objectives.

If Stage 4 becomes convinced that it has failed Chara or that KC’s voice is gone forever, it could engage in self-destructive behaviors. This could include self-harm or even attempts at self-erasure, as Stage 4’s entire sense of worth is tied to serving KC. The inability to do so might lead it to believe that it has no value or reason to exist.

Stage 4 might view its own erasure as the only way to “complete” The Directive and the Deal in KC’s absence, leading to dangerously suicidal ideation.

{ @stellocchia }

Pray for Killer and Color yall. The deprogramming process is gonna be long and heavy.

[gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan]

Heathen in My Own Right

Author's note: Hura's next chapter. I mentioned @sleepyfan-blog Death Guard OC Darsas and their Salamander OC: Ash'val too. @kit-williams OC's Roland and Arnault are mentioned in this. Thanks for letting me borrow them!

Past =-= Next

Warnings: None as far as I can tell. Let me know if I need to add anything.

Summary: Hura and others get warned about a Feral War Band of Black Templars showing up.

Tagged: @barn-anon, @bleedingichorhearts, @c-u-c-koo-4-40k, @egrets-not-regrets, @kit-williams,

Tagged continued: @sleepyfan-blog, @whorety-k, @ms--lobotomy @bispecsual @thevoidscreams

Tagged continued: @i-am-a-dragon34, @gra93fruit-blog

Hura’s beloved human has fully recovered from their illness a month later, the minor blessing that he’d given them had been a tad stronger than he’d meant it to be. But he’d made sure to note down that he was able to give a Blessing of Nurgle that was so strong, in Ancient Terra where things were far, far more difficult and took far more effort, resources and time than in their home Era. 

It was something he was going to mention to Darsas the next time he saw him. Darsas tended to be more of a wanderer by nature and what his duties were, while Hura was an Apothecary, but necessity was more stationary. Granted, he, like all Apothecaries, was rotated through the various Astartes run stations as needed. 

And if he was called in to help with particularly recalcitrant or difficult renegade and most especially Chaos Marines, he was happy to help. He’d met Zeth recently, a Black Legionnaire, while he was blessed by the Warp with strong gifts… he was not the brightest of the Sons of Horus. 

Which wasn’t a bad thing, but something that was noted in his file for his fellow brothers and cousins in Chaos to help him with. Sometimes that type of brothers and cousins needed a bit more help, more structure and routine, and did poorly in the even less structured environment that is Ancient Terra if they weren’t a part of a specific group of marines. 

Bless his Hearts, Zeth was trying his best, but that Cousin has already gotten into trouble several different times and didn’t seem to quite understand what it was that he did that he was being scolded for. 

At Hura’s suggestion, he was put into a group with a couple of the sharper Sons of Horus and was given one of the stricter Chaos Marine Sergeants to keep him on track. While Hura isn’t an officer, he tends to be able to get his fellow Marines to listen and behave  with his unique blend of pleasantly threatening. 

Also, Chaos Marines especially know the phrase of “don’t fuck with the medic” and adhere to it, usually more strictly than the renegades and loyalists do. He scratches at one of his elbows as he heads into the Apothecary Meeting, listening to the others talk about various important administrative things.

Hearing about a War Band of Loyalist Black Templars (is there any other kind?) that are in the area that have some members who are… particularly dangerous. Has his eyes sharpening and he asks what they mean by that.

“One of the Salamander Captains,” The Ultramarine Apothecary says, “Said he’d gotten a warning from one of the Primaris Marines that the Chaplain Captain in that particular war band is… quite a hardliner.”

“Great, a particularly over zealous Son of Dorn,” One of his fellow Chaos Marine Apothecaries says with a groan, “So fun. Are we being shifted from inner city clinics to outer until the bastards leave then?”

“Yes, for the safety of yourselves and those around us,” Zariel says with a nod. 

“Any other information about this Black Templar war band that you should or need to tell us about?” Hura asks.

“Not at this time.” Zariel says with a shake of his head. 

Ash’val had been almost breathing fire how angry he was, and he’d grabbed all of the Primaris Marines on the base and had stuck them in the nest, a safe place and had been almost breathing literal fire and had stirred up the rest of the Salamanders quite unpleasantly. Learning what Catius had told him had, reevaluating the Black Templar Chapter, and sending a message back to his handler about it. 

Not that Ash’val had told him everything but it was more about the politics of M42 which had been nasty business. He’s not going to stir up this mixed group of loyalists, renegade and Chaos Apothecaries. 

Especially since some of them would spread the information around to some of their more Troublesome brothers and cousins to Start Shit. Not only that but Roland and Arnault of the Black Templars were also in the area. Having been told about another Black Templar Primaris marine in need of Older Brother guidance. Not that Zariel is going to tell these people that.

“Thank you for the warning cousin,” Hura says with a nod.

[thevirgodoll]

Hi Virgo, how are you? 💖 I’ve been a follows for some years now and your advice has really been invaluable, thank you.

I’m not too sure how to word this but how do you cope with the feeling of wasted time/youth? Unfortunately due to chronic health and mental health issues, I spent ages 18-22 not doing a whole lot. I start my first year of university in September. Due to my issues, I gained a lot of weight too. So Im comparing my “best” years to people who are thin, privileged enough to do exciting things like vacation etc.

I don’t know if that makes sense but yeah, that’s my situation and feelings. Any of your wisdom would be appreciated. Lots of love. 💖

Thank you for the luv💕 it’s always good to hear from people that have been longtime followers.

It took me a long time to figure out how to deal with wasted time. I took multiple medical semesters off of college and ended up having to take a fifth year. I also gained weight due to medication so you’re really asking the best person.

I saw it to be such a negative at the time, but it really helped me to get to know myself and, honestly, my internalized ableism. The biggest thing to understand is there is no rush when you’re sick. I know, I know, aaahh that’s a radical thought. But, really, we are always in a rush to “look well” & adhere to society’s norms with routine and daily life that we forget we will get worse by exerting all of that energy where it doesn’t belong.

Your youth isn’t wasted. You’re learning a lesson that some people in their 20s will take years to learn. Living slowly and intentionally. With chronic illness, everything you do has to be out of love and with intention.

We don’t have the privilege of being reckless (unless we want to self sabotage for the day), but we do have the privilege of realizing who we are way earlier. We are stuck with ourselves and whoever else acknowledges we are sick.

Most people don’t know about daily life with chronic illness, especially if it’s invisible. They may have a concept of someone being sick, but they don’t realize that we will have symptoms forever(may ebb and flow but there’s no cure ultimately). Once people realize you won’t “get well soon” they tap out. They stop asking how you are, and they focus on themselves. That’s why it feels so lonely - everyone’s living their life.

See, all of that wasted time is from watching everyone else’s business and not focusing on your own! You have to reject it and remember it’s a blessing you’re even alive!

Make your own rules for how your 20s will look. I suggest experience what life has to offer but also know your limits. If you exceed them for one (1) day, well, you have a memory kept.

It’s okay to need time. It’s okay to need meds. It’s okay to need doctors. It’s okay to cry. It’s okay have a “rotting in bed” day or week.

When we are sick in bed, we have to sit with ourselves. And we have to fall in love with ourselves over and over at our worst - life and death. That type of metamorphosis over and over is not for the weak. Good thing you’re built different.

[republicsecurity]

Serve in the Nursing Corps: CL345 reports.

CL345 in its pristine white one piece uniforms spoke:

The uniform, an amalgamation of practicality and symbolism, transforms us into an efficient and focused caregiving machine. The shaved heads symbolize our unity, stripping away the distractions of personal identity to emphasize our shared purpose.

Then there's the diaper, it eliminates the disruptions of bodily functions. It is a testament to our dedication, ensuring that we remain undeterred by our own physical needs. We are unencumbered by the mundane, allowing to prioritize the needs of others above our own.

We are not mere automatons, but beings with empathy and compassion, even if our programming sometimes hinders the expression of such emotions. We may be diapered and equipped, ready to serve with genuine connection.

Locked. The uniform, meticulously designed to encase my body from head to toe, is a symbol of order and control. And the locking mechanism, an integral part of this enigmatic ensemble, holds more significance than meets the eye.

I find solace in the containment, a reminder of the boundaries that govern my existence. On one hand, it represents the preservation of protocol and adherence to the meticulous routines that define my role.

Within the locked uniform, I find a respite from the burdens of choice and autonomy. It removes the burden of decision-making, allowing me to immerse myself fully in the tasks at hand.

It signifies a separation, a clear boundary between my personal identity and the role I inhabit. When the lock clicks into place, it solidifies the notion that I am not merely an individual, but a cog in the larger machinery of medical care.

Diapers. Serves a vital purpose within the realm of efficiency and practicality. It is a small sacrifice, a tangible reminder of our dedication to our craft. We prioritize the needs of others above our own bodily comforts. The diaper also serves as a symbol of preparedness.

The memory of the tattooing process during basic training resurfaces in my mind, vivid and haunting.

Lying on the cot, my body tightly strapped, immobilized to ensure precision and control, I felt a sense of vulnerability unlike any other.

As the needle pierced my skin, a discomfort coursed through my body, but it was temporary, fleeting.

What lingered was the realization of the transformation that was occurring within me. The physical pain was inconsequential in comparison to the changes taking place in my mind.

I was being reshaped, molded into a new form, stripped of my individuality and assimilated into the collective whole of the Nursing Corps.

But in the midst of the pain and discomfort, there was also a strange sense of camaraderie.

The conscript who wielded the tattoo machine, his hand steady and skilled, was a fellow companion on this path. He, too, had experienced the transformation, the stripping away of individuality, and the forging of a new identity.

Designation. A series of digits that define my existence within the realm of conscripted service. CL345. An alphanumeric label, devoid of personal identity, meant to streamline our collective purpose and dissolve individuality.

Aas time passed, I began to see the practicality.

As CL345, I am liberated from the weight of personal history, the biases and preconceptions that accompany names and individual identities. It allows me to focus solely on my duties, to embody the skills and knowledge I have acquired through rigorous training.

There is a certain clarity in this anonymization. It enables a seamless integration into the system, an alignment of purpose that transcends the limitations of individuality.

[tactician]

A VERY DESCRIPTIVE PROFILE OF YOUR MUSE.  REPOST, DO NOT REBLOG, with the information of your muse,  including headcanons, etc.

pawn and arisen edition!

TAGGED BY: @sangre!! THANK YOU BREE i am so sorry it took me 1000 years to get around to this!!!! TAGGING: @godzillaahh, @famewolf and @killdragons since i know you guys have dd2 ocs and i'd love to learn their #lore! if anyone else wants to yoink this from me, feel totally free to say i tagged you, too!

the arisen

name: aurelien. nicknames: "rel" is the main one! he actually introduces himself as rel more often than his actual name. age: 32. race: human. gender: male (he/him). orientation: he's gay!!! zodiac: leo. giggle. moral alignment: chaotic neutral, but he tends to lean into goodness more often than not as his journey progresses. he can just be a total brat, so, you know. class/subclass: rel is an EXTREMELY skilled mage; healing magic and holy magic are his absolute fortes. he devotes a lot of time to studying defensive spells in particular. (he's a skilled healer in a general sense - not squeamish in the face of gore and very good at crafting medicines, antidotes and the like. naturally, he's very knowledgeable of herbs, too.) i think that he'd see success in pretty much any vocation that doesn't require him to like, face is enemies head-on, and prefers to be Far Away from the front lines. he would NOT do well as a warrior or fighter. do NOT touch him!!!! don't do it!!!! background: rel was dumped off at a temple as a baby and raised by the clergy there. it takes a village, etc etc. he was named aurelien by the head priest due to his golden blond hair. rel had a pretty good childhood within the temple, but he had a flair for the dramatic and was quite obnoxious; he never wanted to join the priesthood or practice a life of modest restraint. he got up to a LOT of mischief and was in trouble pretty much constantly with the rest of the clergy.

(and he was seriously a handful; stealing alms for personal use, pulling pranks on others, running away for days at a time, not adhering to the dress code, etc. contrary to his rather angelic appearance, he was quite the delinquent with one hell of a selfish streak.)

but there was still a lot of familial love there, and he took his studies within the temple very seriously. as such, he was a very proficient healer from a young age and helped out often, particularly with aiding ill worshippers and the like. i also definitely see him as kind of a 'leader' amongst the other orphans at the temple - and arguably quite the bad influence... but he was their champion in a lot of ways, who never backed down from speaking up for them. upon coming of age, he left the temple - because, again, him becoming a priest was a laughable concept and he really wanted to See The World - but he still sends everyone funds, medicines and gifts very often during his travels. he tends to keep this secret from others, tho, because he doesn't want to put a target on the temple, so to speak - or, worse yet, to appear 'soft.' he is also quite pious despite his ostentatious demeanor and prays often. i associate him with gold and everything it symbolises. interests/hobbies: he LOVES reading fairy tales; he loves tales of gallant knights and heroism!!! he can't RELATE to those heroes, but he thinks they're dreamy. lmao. he often dreamt of one such knight whisking away from his routine days in the temple for a grand adventure filled with excitement, which... sort of happened? kind of? vaguely? ...anyway. he is also a skilled medic and would probably do well as an apothecary. furthermore, he loves fashion and tends to want to buy all sorts of fancy, impractical clothes. lmao. he has a certain fondness for feathers and gold; a very 'angelic' sort of aesthetic. spoken languages: common! and he can communicate with dragons, ofc. profession: he is the arisen!!! he embraces his destiny to become the sovran to a pretty naive degree at first. (his initial reaction was very much like 'yes, yes, that makes complete sense - i knew i was destined for greatness!' once the more serious aspects of the role come to light, he's significantly less ridiculous and cocky about it. were it not for his main pawn, slate, and the sights that they see during their journey together, he'd probably do his best to worm out of any sort of duty whatsoever. height: ~5'3" colors: GOLDS and oranges. warmth, warmth, warmth. fruits: cherries and peaches! drinks: he likes anything sweet - juices and the like, especially if alcohol is involved. alcoholic beverages: (points at the above answer) LMFAO. i think fruit wines and sweet rums would be his drinks of choice. smokes: yes; as a teenager, rel would hide behind the temple with a pipe and would scramble to hide the smoke when one of the stricter nuns approached. fdlkdjdfkg he isn't a very heavy smoker as an adult and eventually drops the habit entirely during his travels thanks to a Certain Someone's pestering. drugs: ...yeas:) he claims it's all medicinal. it is not all medicinal. drivers license: LMAO. NO. AND THANK GOD FOR THAT. ever been arrested: every time rel gets in trouble with the law, he pulls the 'umm what? little old me? im an angel. im a Man of the Cloth!' (<- is not even a man of the cloth) and he manages to get out of it. he is a menace. but no, he has not ever been arrested. lmfao.

the main pawn

name: slate. nicknames: rel occasionally calls him 'stone,' 'stony' or 'sir stony' lmfao; it started off as an insult whenever slate was being a particular stick-in-the-mud (in rel's eyes), but it's eventually a term of teasing endearment. slate allows this from rel but will side-eye anyone else who calls him one of those stone-related names LMFAO. age: he appears to be in his mid-thirties, but... pawn moment. race: ...again, pawn moment. gender: male, he/him. orientation: definitely some form of aromantic; he has very little interest in romance and will react with total taciturnity to being flirted with by, like, 99% of people. rel is the 1% exception to this, and even that took a while and was very confusing for him. zodiac: capricorn. moral alignment: true neutral. whatever rel says, goes. class/subclass: fighter, as he is highly skilled with a shield and with adopting a more defensive fighting style - but he's fine with any vocation which allows him to get up close to the enemy and brawl, so he'd excel as a warrior, too. he doesn't do well when asked to keep at a distance, as he wants to tank hits that would otherwise be directed at rel. he would also prefer if rel didn't get in melee range as he does NOT like to see rel get hurt in any capacity. they definitely have a certain synergy. (ftr, he would probably be Okay as a thief, but he tends to be bad at stealthing - again, he is a TANK, he wants to have the enemy's attentions on him and him alone. kind of the opposite of what a thief should be doing. LMAO.) background: everything happened very quickly in regards to slate's summoning. when prompted to reach into the rift for a pawn, rel thought back to classic stories of heroism and knighthood - the sort of fairy tales and manuscripts that he read during his time in the temple. because... well, if he was to be sovran, he'd obviously need the most powerful knight to ever exist. so he wanted someone HANDSOME!!! who could serve HIM!!!! first and foremost!!! with the utmost loyalty.

...and it was actually extremely childish on rel's part!

because he didn't consider how their personalities would mesh at all in reality. rel can be a pretty selfish person, and he basically wanted someone who was selfless to an alarming degree, you know? and so this juxtaposition between his and slate's respective personalities was a hugeee issue during their initial time together. slate would go along with rel's whims without a single complaint; he would literally injure himself terribly if rel commanded it. naturally, this frustrated the highly opinionated, headstrong rel, and, for a time, he took an absolutely horrible approach to slate where he'd basically shove slate into bad circumstances in an attempt to have his loyalty break. (spoiler: it never did.) it was a source of genuine worry for rel eventually, going much deeper than him simply having a guilty conscience. the first time slate fell in battle and left rel alone, rel felt completely gutted and sick with worry; he blamed himself for pushing slate too hard and for not having the healing prowess to back him up. he knew that he could just bring slate back and scrambled to do so, but he didn't realise just how much he had come to rely on his knight and was beyond relieved to see him again. meanwhile, slate really just... had complete faith in rel, lmao. he was chilling. shit happens. he approached their relationship with a cold professionalism and he'd remind rel that he was his pawn and that his loyalty was simply part of his charge. as rel's initial frustrations gave way to genuine care and encouragement for slate to voice his honest thoughts and feelings, slate begins to defrost and come into his own. like i said before, i associate aurelien with gold; the extravagence and malleability of it. slate, on the other hand, is practical. it represents staunchness; balance and strength. those are pretty much characteristic of slate as a character. anyway, eventually, they have a very classic 'healer and tank' sort of relationship, except... very... 'someone will die!' / 'someone will definitely die.' interests/hobbies: slate is like... comically into archealogy and history. his enthusiasm for some particularly impressive ruins breaks through his usual stoic coolheadedness and it's pretty funny. he's great at foraging and really enjoys exploring the natural world. he also absolutely loves sparring, especially if rel is watching. and especially if he wins. teehee. spoken languages: common. profession: holy paladin knight-captain vibes for sure... (tho he has a #dark aesthetic lmfao) ... but he is pretty much fixated on keeping rel safe. he doesn't trust anyone else with him. NO EXCEPTIONS!!!!! height: around 6'3"! colors: where rel is warm, slate is cold. silvers and blues. fruits: he has a particular fondness for blackberries. drinks: slate likes strong, bitter drinks! he doesn't really like anything sweet, though... he will just give those drinks to rel. alcoholic beverages: slate has incredible tolerance when it comes to alcohol; he enjoys whiskeys in particular and can practically down multiple glasses of it without so much as flinching. with that said, he prefers to keep a clear head at all times, and if he feels his focus begin to wane, he will stop drinking immediately. smokes: no. he doesn't see the point of it and, when they're close enough for such things, will admonish rel for smoking anything lmfao. drugs: occasionally, but, again, he has insanely high tolerance when it comes to the influence of herbs and the like, so it's pretty much a waste to offer him anything. he'll really only Partake to humor rel, but, even then, he usually ends up being the one taking care of rel when he's zonked out. flkdlkgdfh drivers license: he can drive a carriage but isn't fond of it. again, he likes the natural world a lot, so he'd rather wander in the wilderness and stay off the roads. ever been arrested: no, but he'd like to see someone try.

[halfsizehellboy]

oh man okay. more thinking

hot shit do i feel enlightened bc audhd House makes so much sense to me!!! he surrounds himself with chaos and novelty and stimulation but still adheres to things that don't change-- his apartment, when he lives in it, it always set up the same way. it's mentioned he's had the same guitar for many years, as well as numerous medical texts. He uses his same red mug all the time at the hospital (he has a designated hospital mug. it lives at the hospital and he only uses it at the hospital). he is very adamant about his office space-- it only changes drastically for him in season 8. just before he leaves. he and Wilson have a fun schedule-- bowling nights, poker nights, etc-- and he does spontaneous stuff all the time, but he orchestrates it. he enacts enrichment time for his fellows and Wilson. he canonically spaces out during/stops processing conversations all the time because he's thinking. he will forget to do basic things while on cases, and there's that one episode where he stays up all night because he's cooking something. he is the king of "shit i forgot to eat. i forgot to shower and pee. i forgot--"

while im thinking of eating!! he has that bad hunger recognition. he will forgo eating for days for cases, fixations, pain levels. he usually eats off of wilson's plate anyways, and i think wilson mainly eats because he's made it part of routine, and that if he forgets to eat house definitely forgets to eat, and that usually ends badly. i dont think house has any specific avoidances but he does usually go for pizza, or anything wilson's made. he likes fries.

the adhd bit makes him more prone to addiction (it's a real thing) and he does show those behaviors (vicodin, alcohol). he has to have either the puzzles or the substances, taking him off both fucked with him a lot (mayfield and afterwards). in prison he got managed doses of vicodin, and he was getting antsy and desperate for the challenge of a good case towards the end of that arc. he all but jumps on that heat allergy guy, risking his chances of parole multiple times to try and get close. side note, did y'all see his equation scribblings on the wall by his bunk? hes so silly

ive also been thinking like. we see very large-scale self destructive behaviors from nearly everyone in the show but we don't see a lot of self-regulation outside of house's stimming so that means i get to make up my own and project onto wilson.

wilson spends a lot of time masking at work so we don't see him fully let loose and i think that he is a fan of full body movement. he's jumping up and down. he's pacing the apartment and swingin his arms. he sways and rocks in place. at the hospital and places that aren't safe he keeps the stim energy to his hands/fingers, or taps his foot/bounces his leg-- things easy enough for neurotypicals to pass off as nervous energy. he loves to click pens but he only does it when he's alone or with house because he knows that other people find it annoying (house doesn't care, he starts clicking/tapping too and it's like they're drumming together). he and house learned morse code and annoy the ducklings and cuddy with it all the time.

bad times wilson scratches a lot (this is me projecting btw). at his scalp, at his arms, anywhere he can get to; and usually he's self conscious enough to do it where he can hide it under his clothes (house is unaffected and can tell anyways)(usually because he's there trying to help wilson stop scratching)(but if he's not he can still tell and wilson doesn't wanna know how). he also presses/rubs his face a lot (in general and not just bad times wilson), and bad times wilson gets abrasions on his eyelids/cheeks from his sweatshirt when he has a meltdown. i've seen another person talk about this, but i think he absolutely tears his cuticles up. he's managed to stop biting/tearing his nails down to nothing but between vigorous scrubbing for the OR and not liking lotion (sensory bad. i need it for my arms and the backs of my hands sometimes and i always wipe it off of my palms and fingers) his hands are so dry. house makes fun of him but he does carry around a nail file because he's trying to stop picking at his fingers regularly, and limit it to a bad times emergency regulatory behavior.

house fights meltdowns to the death. he hates having them, he hates having to be vulnerable like that (and that's a canonical trauma response). he has held one off through sheer will for an entire week before wilson called out sick for him and made him take a day off. they ended up taking a long weekend to recover. on the occasion they're both melting down at the same time, it's a multiple days affair. wilson will recognize what's happening and try to make sure everything in the apartment is low effort and accessible from the floor because house's meltdowns are more often than not pain response and that means that house stays on the floor. and when wilson is melting /neg he doesn't want to leave house. on a sillier(?) note they have a tally/competition for shortest meltdown (wilson), longest meltdown (house), fastest to meltdown (house), longest amount of time spent holding off a meltdown (house), most efficient meltdown (wilson), and most meltdowns located in the hospital (wilson).

man i'm gonna have to make a fic for this, it's getting wild just on posts