#Make Tea Not War

[captain-mozzarella]

I headcanon that all of Yoda's finest teacups were made by younglings

In fact most masters of the order's finest teacups were made during crèche crafting time when the kids were learning pottery.

[ominouspuff]

Fwoom (intimidatingly)

[dathomirdumpsterfire]

~~~ a little flash fic, because i couldn't resist 🔥 ~~~

Make Tea Not War

For all that Ahsoka had fretted about sending him to meet this unknown contact in her place, Plo finds the energy of the restaurant to be rather comfortable. Calm and mellow in the force. He makes a noise of interest, drifting past the welcome desk and softly encouraging the staff to forget they had ever seen a kel dor here.

There's a corner table, one with small purple flowers in a glass vase. The secret sign he was to look for. Plo spots a party of one at the table, and an empty chair... presumably for himself. Or well, for little 'Soka, but hopefully he will suffice. She had enough on her hands with the Rebellion, and he wished dearly to help where he could.

Caustic yellow eyes meet his across the room, and it is only the grace of his years which keeps Plo's pace steady. That... is Darth Maul. The crimson skin and stark tattoos are rather unmistakable. He carries on walking up to the table, then bows politely.

"Sincere apologies, but your intended contact was not able to make this rendezvous. I humbly ask you accept my presence instead."

There is a brief delay, then the nightbrother hums softly. Unexpectedly softly, for one of his reputation.

"Sit. It matters not to me who is across this table, so long as their discretion is assured."

So, Plo sits.

"That, I can certainly guarantee," he promises.

Sith and jedi stare at each other across a table decorated by delicate flowers and complementary fruits, neither knowing where to start. After a moment, it is Plo who makes an attempt to bridge the gap.

"You look well. Your current lifestyle must suit you," he tries.

Maul gives him a bored look.

"If you please," he asks, "let us skip the pleasantries."

Plo coughs, to hide amusement. He is reminded of Mace's bluntness. "Of course, of course."

Maul leans forward, fingers lacing together over one knee.

"So," the other man drawls in a sharp coruscanti accent, "Your organization needs funding, and I am willing to contribute. Regularly. Significantly."

Plo had expected to meet a potential benefactor, but he was still surprised to hear the offer extended from this particular mouth.

"You... please forgive my surprise, but you of all people wish to help... my kind, and those who strive alongside us?"

It is not safe to say the words, but they both know what he means.

Maul looks at him for a long time, a chilly presence in the force. He reaches some kind of conclusion, and sighs, looking away.

"The enemy of my enemy is my ally."

Plo blinks twice, then smiles a little, a twitch pulling on his tusks.

"An old adage, but an apt one I think," Plo offers.

The nightbrother's brows pop briefly in agreement.

A waiter comes by, a polite and sweet voiced droid that takes their drink orders, and fills them within the span of minutes. It is a minor indulgence, but Plo requests a glass of wine. Something in short supply on the little base he lived on nowadays. He slips his mask off and on to take every sip, but it is worth the while. A sweet, dry red.

The nightbrother clears his throat, almost awkwardly, and asks a question Plo couldn't have predicted. "Tell me... have you heard any rumors if the Baran Do ways still thrive?"

The sages of Dorin? Now why would he care for such a thing? Still. Even asking was an olive branch all its own.

"I am sure the winds will always favor them," Plo replies cheerfully.

Maul seems to take a breath, and when he exhales he is lighter. In the metaphorical sense, of course.

Plo hums, tapping a talon on the stem of his wine. "You have an interest in their ways?"

Those yellow, bloodshot eyes glance at him, then away.

"Ahhh," he says, "every... tradition that can weather these stormy days is to be protected. A tsunami which leaves only devastation in its wake is not to anyone's benefit."

Surprise after surprise. Plo would not believe it out of the mouth of another, but if his aural canals do not deceive him... Darth Maul just named his own master anathema. Quite the tsunami he was.

Was it still Darth Maul, he wonders... or had the infamous nightbrother taken steps onto his own path.

The jedi master bows his head, appreciating the gift of information. A grain of precious truth, extended to a make-shift ally amid a famine. He can *feel* the discomfort of honesty in the force. Precious indeed.

"Just so," Plo agrees. "Tsunami are horribly destructive. It is important to evacuate anyone who falls in their path."

There was, in Plo's mind, no greater cause remaining than extending the underground network of The Path. Sneaking out force sensitive from Imperial controlled planets was what he lived for.

A case is withdrawn from the folds of stark black robes, and pushed over to his side of the table.

"Allow me to contribute to the evacuation fund, then," Maul says smoothly, sitting back to sip at his caf with cream. "So that fewer traditions are lost."

Plo doesn't hesitate to secret away the case, not pausing to look inside. However much it is, he is grateful for every credit.

"A worthy cause, I agree."

They sit for another half hour, only exchanging the briefest mutterings, nursing their drinks. The nightbrother claims the bill, pays, and refuses thanks.

"Do not thank me, je- hnn. No, do not thank me. Be here again in three months, at the same time, alone."

Without another word, the last person Plo had expected to meet today walks away, a dark wraith in the restaurant's sea of pastels. No one seems to notice him go by. Plo's exit a little while later is much the same, though with a little less black involved.

This is NOT a ship. I just wanted to draw this for what part of my brain demands recently: background design. So there you go, experiment on the husbands.

[guardian-angle22]

HAYDEN CHRISTENSEN. Actor and Tea Connoisseur.

[ventresses]

Star Wars + Moodboards

Codywan: Desert Husbands

[deserthusbands]

obi-wan: cody, i think you've finally done it. you may have just made the perfect cup of tea.

cody: i've had.. reasons, to practice. plus, i know how much you appreciate the little things. and tea.

obi-wan: it's the little things that matter the most.

cody: like you remembering to drink it before it gets cold?

obi-wan: yes yes.. thank you, my dear.

[poppy-glitters]

I am obsessed when idioms with way too many real world implications make their way into media like this. Cause it actually means nothing but what if the Cookie Run universe just had opium in canon…own version of the Opium Wars… a Crispia Opioid Crisis… Opium Poppy Cookie-

[varpusvaras]

Alderaan, 3.15 am, some days after the war has ended:

Fox, startling awake: Bail?

Bail: Yes...?

Fox: I forgot my commlink to Coruscant

Bail: Oh, don’t worry about it, we can get you a new one

Fox: Yes but all my contacts are in that one, what if one of my brothers tries to call me and they panic because they can’t contact me?

Bail: Fox, you are in one of the Core worlds and publicly living with the Queen and her consort, if none of your brothers are capable of reading the news, that sounds like it’s their problem

Fox: ....I like it when you are right

Breha, from the other side of the bed: They better learn how to read the news before the wedding, now back to sleep both of you

--- --- ---

Fox, with his new commlink in hand: hey guys, how are you doing? I’m asking now because none of you came to my wedding

Rex, yelling the loudest in the group call: BITCH we thought you were DEAD, where the fuck are you???!!

Fox:

Bail:

Breha:

Cody: wait, what wedding- Obi-Wan why are you laughing at me

[stoat-party]

“How dare they burn everything the Courier loves to ashes!”

*imagines my courier reacting to watching everything she loves burn to ashes*

“…that’s some good stuff. you got me this time todd.”

[ghosts-of-love]

if i saw the captain in normal clothes i think i would actually just perish on the spot like it was hard enough seeing him without the jacket, shirt sleeves rolled up. dread to think what would happen if I saw him in a sweater vest. or a different shirt. high waisted trousers. vest and dressing gown and slippers. the possibilities are endless and alarming.

[spineless-lobster]

Sing O muse of the cataclysmic rage of achilles…

*tea kettle screaming*

[now-you-sound-like-a-jedi]

Reading the High Republic comics right now and is it just me or do Estala Maru and Avar Kriss kinda give anyone else Giles and Buffy vibes??

Like you can't tell me these aren't Buffy and Giles coded interactions

[randomnameless]

The quintessential problem with Claude and the deer is that they should not have been involved in the war at all, or at least not Claude. What does he have to gain participating on it? Nothing, and he makes it even more explicit in azure moon when he dissolves the alliance. He could've pretty easely given the power to Lorenz or Hilda and nope out of there (what he does in silver snow), as it is clear througouht white clouds that he doesn't have as much of an attachtment to Fodlan as he does Almyra. And it isn't like the devs couldn't take the deer studients out during post-TS, when Marianne unless recruited is pressumed dead, and Lorenz unless recruited joins the imperial forces and dies helping the empire.

Outside of the problems with racism and the bigoted tropes related to "savage cultures" the Fodlan games perpetuate, the devs did not know how to use one of their house leaders for the main plot of "church vs empire", and idk if that's because they bit more than they could chew, or if it was intentional taking into account who gets the short end of the stick in both games happens to be mixed and from one of those "savage cultures".

TBH...

It's on the devs for having wanted to add a third lord to their game, but failing to, well, link him to any of those plots.

Supreme Leader's war of unification?

Well, Nopes gave him a part this plot - and yet there's no third choice in this plot : you bend the knee or you die. Nopes' wise, Clout decided (in his route) to bend the knee with his "alliance" that is totally supposed to make Supreme Leader reconsider her desire to roll over Leicester and make it part of Adrestia again!

(Granted, Nopes don't tell us how his plea to stop the war after killing the evil lizard lady will play out and leaves an open ending...)

In Houses, well, he doesn't want Leicester to be flattened, and goes on the offensive (counter offensive?) when Billy pops up with basically what is the plot events of Silver Snow (down to using the same strategy with disguises) with the Gronder Map.

And that addition radically changes... well, everything regarding Claude's relevance : he cannot form an alliance with the Blue Lord or the Kingdom to get rid of the Empire because "plot convenient myopia" and apparently Dimitri BaD enough that he attacks Alliance troops for no reason.

Forget SS, GW (and AM, in a way) is just using plot contrived excuse to... not have an united from to face the Empire. Why? IDK. Each Lord must be the hero of his story, or the unification boner means only one of them can "win" an unified Fodlan i'd guess.

Nabateans and the plot ?

No one gives a fig about that "plot", so it's basically pursuing a side-quest for no payoff.

Now, as @fantasyinvader wrote, Claude's story and journey as one who is ignorant and gets to learn and clear his misconceptions + the background of the land we're living in could have been interesting, doubly so given how Billy is voiceless and cannot play the "protag discovers the world at the same time as the player does" role.

But it has... no payoff.

Much like Rhea's infodump about the World, Relics and Nabateans... Claude reacts to the mention that Billy has a rock for heart, and not about his crest, his shiny bow or the fact that Rhea also had a vested interest in, uh, getting rid of prejudice against people who are perceived as "different" because her family was genocided for that.

Hell, the entire "prejudice" angle from Supreme Leader's war is swept under the rug, so we can have the Deers say nonsense like wanting to rekt Thales for Supreme Leader's sake, while only Flayn and Seteth can hear her "nabateans shouldn't have power over the people"...

There's no parallel drawn in the game about Claude and Rhea's situation - since she's at the center of this subplot - about being perceived as "outsiders" and not being able to do various things from existing to "rule over the people" because of what they are, or even faking their identities and building metaphorical walls between them and the people they're living with because they are afraid of rejection.

Nah, we can't have that, Rhea must be irrelevant to the possible, while also being the biggest scapegoat/dragon of this saga at the same time as a nebulous red herring to sell pots of tea.

Ihthe "fight against prejudice and make people accept each other" angle was that relevant to his route, Claude would have most likely talked or interacted with Dimitri and learnt of his plan to cleanse Duscur's name in his Father's assassination, raised a brow at Petra being a hostage and done something else than give a surprised pikachu face at Rhea's infodumps.

He could have reacted at her reveal that if you might want to live in peace with some people, if those people don't want that and label you as nothing more than fodder or things to be looted, it's not going to work.

And of course, gave a reaction at your second in command (unofficially?)'s reveal that, uh, her house keeps identured Almyran children as war prisoners?

Some people already made some AUs or "what ifs" routes for a proper Claude route and not the nonsense that we got in FE16 where it's basically "I react to the same plot events that happen in the other routes but top it all with a zombie".

The Deers could have been "better introduced" in a plot about getting rid of prejudice, or learning the causes of this prejudice : Marianne was/is hunted because of her blood ties to Maurice - not because what she did, but because what Momo did back then! - Lysithea was treated as a guinea pig and her house rolled over by Adrestia who has a less than rosy views about the "offshoots" that are called Leicester and Faerghus, Lorenz could explain that prejudice, just like piety, are tools used by people whenever they're relevant, like, some people being pissed at foreigners and some who aren't because they make money through international trading like Margrave Edmund does, Hilda justifying her House's animosity towards Almyrans because they lost many people in those pointless skirmishes (maybe a closed ones? Her mom or Uncle or whatever?) which would make Claude realise that "ending prejudice" is a much more difficult quest than, idk, just killing one or two randoms.

The commoner trio might share Claude's views about prejudice and welcoming foreigners, but have more "mundane" worries like being able to have a roof and food to eat, which might be the case of some people in Leicester, or tell us more about Leicester and how it works (give us more insight about the different countries if Fodlan ffs).

Maybe we could have add a Claude who learns and discovers Fodlan, and along the way, starts to love the land as much, if not more, than Almyra and really wanting to protect this land from whatever Supreme Leader's cooking, or becoming an Almyra v.2.

I don't think making Claude the third wheel of the plot was maliciously intentional because of the, uh, implications with RL cultures and Almyra, but more like they didn't know where to put him.

I noticed you wrote the conflict as one that is "the church vs the empire", but I do not really agree - if that was the case, the war would have stopped in VW/AM/SS the second Rhea was caught.

The main conflict is Supreme Leader's war of conquest - with the twist that the devs were really banking on their brilliant idea of making the red emperor the titular waifu of the game that each person/lord/whatever Rhea is must find a way to excuse and/or justify her actions.

With this in mind, AM is basically Dimitri's fall (and rise!) because of his ties to Supreme Leader.

In VW? The game cannot explore too much outside of the Supreme Leader scope so we're left with.. well, what VW was.

Claude cannot go on a journey to discover Fodlan and get rid of his misconceptions... because part of those same misconceptions are used by Supreme Leader to start her war, or the sheer concept of a conquest, aka a nation being rolled over by another is anathema to his, supposed, ideal of wanting people to accept each other despite their differences.

I ranted about it since day 5, but the Nabatean subplot (and Fodlan in general) is accessory to Supreme Leader war, there is no point aka no payoff for learning all of that, because you cannot challenge the one who wants to unify the continent.

As such, Claude cannot deviate too far from this plot - while receiving infodumps about "the lore" - and we end up with third wheel of a bike and characters who, at first and second glance, appear to be irrelevant.

Fodlan ends up unified despite starting as three separate countries, we feel bad for Supreme Leader and mourn her unknown ideals, Rhea is gone and the Agarthans aren't a problem anymore.

the second the devs said leicester was a republic, claude was doomed. Merchant republics are always irrelevent or straight up useless in the FE series!

[psychomusic]

GUYS???

I THOUGHT WE WERE LIKE. FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS?? WHAT DOES THIS PROPOSAL EVEN COME FROM

like. first enemies, then coworkers, then coworkers with benefits, THEN she chose me over that anarchist and like. WHAT i thought we were like. friends

[friendlyneighbourhoodelf]

obi-wan has a space trangia (so he can make tea)

[isdalinarhot]

“Dalinar’s not a bad husband at all!” You’re so right, that’s why Evi spent the last full day of her life crying because Dalinar refused to compromise or spend any time with her