papillon-porcelain

[papillon-porcelain]

Amazing

[papillon-porcelain]

[papillon-porcelain]

My medieval servant boy has gone missing. I’ll just use Google to see if I can find him.

[papillon-porcelain]

My favorite moment with my D&D group so far

They met a Demon at a crossroads, he said they had to make a deal with him or he would steal their souls. The Fighter was like, “Hey can you just wait for 5 seconds for me?” 

Demon’s like: “Alright.” 

Five seconds later the Fighter says “Alright our deal is complete” 

???

“What do you mean our deal is complete?” said the Demon

“Well I asked you to wait 5 seconds, then you agreed. Since you waited 5 seconds, that means our deal is complete right?”

The Demon is in shock, and so am I, the DM. This fighter just out-tricked a freakin’ demon deal by telling the demon to cool his heels for a moment I couldn’t believe it.

[papillon-porcelain]

[papillon-porcelain]

thoughts on the Elder Scrolls races

NORDS:

 V I K I N G S

probably eat nails for breakfast

without milk

seriously though these guys have some issues with people drinking milk

their fashion sense is basically strapping as many dead animals to themselves as they can

punch each other for funsies

resolve polictical conflict by via shouting contest

ALTMER:

commonly called high elves because they’re so fucking tall

fab

superiority complex

do not engage in magical combat with them because you will lose

will not rest until they have complained about everything

BOSMER:

smol

chillest of the elven races

outdoor enthusiasts

archery skills to rival legolas

won’t eat their vegetables

KHAJIIT:

furry

Khajiit likes to speak about themselves in 3rd person

nomads

it’s not breaking the law if no one sees you doing it

their hands are their weapons. no seriously they got claws

their king is chosen by the moons. I’m serious

IMPERIALS:

like building empires

not very good at running empires

rich bitches

still sad because they lost sir patrick steward and his son sean bean

slapfights with the altmer 24/7

longing for the day when they will get their shit together

DUNMER:

Edgelords™

their eyes are red their skin is blue they’ll probably set fire to you

ghost whisperer(s)

their gods tend to hold grudges

seriously dont piss of their gods they will fuck you over

kind of in a bad place after most of their homeland literally exploded

BRETONS:

politics

will sell you for one cornchip

kind of the elves’ unwanted bastard child

secretly really good at magic

don’t like their rural cousins in the Reach very much

REDGUARDS:

will knock you on your butt

P I R A T E S

What’s that? You wanna invade their homeland? I’m sorry your authority isn’t recognized in Fort Kickass

wanna see a magic trick?

no

no they don’t

ARGONIANS:

lizard

can breathe underwater

history of getting fucked over by the dunmer

tree huggers

i still dont understand why their women got tiddies. but they do

maids: lusty

ORISMER:

mean green killing machines

literally trained from birth to hand your ass to you

isolate themselves a ot

not that they have to try because they get shit from literally everyone

master smiths

their god may be a bit of a dick sometimes but he looks out for his people

resting bitchface

[papillon-porcelain]

Julie D’Aubigny was a 17th-century bisexual French opera singer and fencing master who killed or wounded at least ten men in life-or-death duels, performed nightly shows on the biggest and most highly-respected opera stage in the world, and once took the Holy Orders just so that she could sneak into a convent and shag a nun.

(via Feminism)

[papillon-porcelain]

im so sorry 

original comic by @rhymewithrachel on twitter

[papillon-porcelain]

I love japanese bc it’s so regular and logical. eg,

kore = this, sore = that, dore = which koko = here, soko = there, doko = where koitsu = this person, soitsu = that person, doitsu = germany

[papillon-porcelain]

[papillon-porcelain]

The NFL has made it official that they will now recognize same sex couples on their kiss cam so that everybody can celebrate love

The NFL showcased its first same-sex couple in a kiss cam last year. And in an ad for Love Has No Labels, a campaign created in partnership with the Ad Council and R/GA, it announced its efforts to zoom in on a greater variety of people.

Gifs: Ad Council

WATCH THE AD

[papillon-porcelain]

SO APPARENTLY MY ENTIRE LIFE IS A LIE HOW HAS YOUR GUYS’ NIGHT BEEN

[papillon-porcelain]

Food $200 Data $150 Fuel $800 Replacing ripped gold shirts $3,600 Utility $150

Jim: someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my crew is dying

[papillon-porcelain]

today on ‘reasons i love john boyega’

[papillon-porcelain]

Bravo. (via imgur)

[papillon-porcelain]

my children <3

[papillon-porcelain]

10.14.17