#Like what do they want EVERYONE to be suffering?

[kenwio]

Joker's kid! reader : how batfamily would react on them trying to end their life

Route : recovered dove

Please read warnings before reading this one!

If you do not feel like reading it, it's okay! (Spoilers will be at the end of this part) Please have tea or hot cocoa, and read relax 💖 and remember there are people who care and support you 💖 I'll be posting more fluff in future parts

Warnings : heavy topics, mentions of death, implications of self-destructive behavior and suicidal behavior, hurt/comfort, traumatized characters.

Idea for this part from this ask here . I also used this idea for comfort part form here

Author's note : I'm including this part in route: Recovered dove only because I want to show that mental healing of Joker's kid is a long way, it had ups and downs, but in the end they have family who acres about them now.

You don't know what exactly triggered it. Maybe it was the fact that everyone started discussing break out in Arkham asylum instead of the usual breakfast convention, maybe it was how Bruce said he didn't have time for you, maybe it was how Alfred was distant today, so you thought something wrong, maybe it was that Dick ignored you today, maybe it was that Jason's aggressive demeanor when you saw him, maybe it was Tim's comment when you brought him coffee, maybe it was Damian's harshness when you meet him near your room today.

That all made you feel so lost. To see them all being unwelcoming to you again was overwhelming. Is it because your father is free again, and they thought you'd be helping him? Wait if your father is free... he will want you back. You don't want back! No! You don't want to be with him again! You do not want to be experimented on again, be beaten up by him again. You thought it was finally over, that you were taken away from that life, never to return. You thought you found family! Why does he have to ruin your life again? He drove her away from you already, the only person who protected you before Batman and his birds, the only person who was your family before them, your mom ... and now he is doing it again; he is taking your family away again! But were they your family? You thought that Bruce was thinking about you as his own child, you thought that Alfred was proud of your progress, you thought that Dick was happy to spend time with you, you thought that Jason was enjoying your shared reading time, you thought that Tim liked to study with you, you thought that Damian finally accepted you. Were you wrong? Was it all a lie? Did they want to use you as bait for your father? Or did they think you would be able to tell them something about him? Was that a reason why they got close to you? But now that they see they were wrong, and after they made sure you didn't know anything, they decided to drop the act?

Was it all a happy dream that's just ended? If it was a dream, you don't want to wake up to the nightmare of your previous life. You can't take the suffering anymore. You need to make it stop to end it, to end it all.

You didn't know how long you were in you were in your thoughts, when you got up. You wanted to live. The room that became your own, became your safe space now felt like JOKE. You needed to get away from it. You struggled to open the window, as it required much strength from your shaking hands. But you were persistent in your efforts to open it, and in the end window opened. You looked down, it was quite high, and you knew that for your body, which was unlike theirs, weak and fragile, it would be enough. You've seen a grown man die when he fell from his high back in a crime alley, so for you, it will definitely be enough. Oh, crime alley, you don't want to go there. You don't want to return to life with Joker. You stood up on the windowsill, looking at the green grass down, feeling the cold night wind against your skin. Your head felt heavy, ringing in your ears just made it all worse. You took one step, and you felt incredibly calm. You took another step, only to be pulled away from the windowsill on the ground and held up. You didn't register the loud voice, the way someone was shaking you. You just sit there staring at nothing in particular, not even able to cry because of how tired you are.

In the meantime, Damian, the one who pulled you away from the window, had already called everyone and was trying hard to make you snap out of it. Yet it was not helping. When Bruce arrived, he moved Damian, who was looking at you with extreme worry, aside. Bruce recognized your expression; he had seen it before - thousand-yard stare - your own mind was protecting you from whatever you were feeling. As he was trying to help you, holding you against him, trying to soothe you, the rest of the family arrived in your room, seeing scared Damian, worried Bruce, and you... you looked so broken. It was too hard on them all

A few hours later, when you fell asleep after you came to your senses and cried for a while, Bruce and others started figuring out what made you feel this way. And it didn't take long; they are a family of detectives, after all. And this all made them feel really bad, guilty. As it turned out, on this day, you were too unlucky to notice only the bad sides of things.

There wasn't any breakout In Arkham asylum. Turns out, the lead they were investigating turned out to be false. Bruce, indeed, was busy, but he failed to communicate this in the normal way: he only added that he would try to make some only by the time you stepped away, which he didn't notice. Alfred was distant because he had a migraine today, but he still wanted to work around the house; there were too many chores to be done in the Wayne manor. Dick didn't mean to ignore you, he was too tired after his few nights of being up and he just failed to notice your quiet presence, being too busy thinking about his bed. Jason was behaving aggressively because of the lead about break out from Arkham asylum, which was the one that he followed for his case, and since it was false; it took the case he was working on back to square one. Tim actually was mumbling about his case, quietly cursing criminals, and not you; just like Jason, he had too much trouble because of that stupid lead. Damian stepped in at the last second to help you avoid stumbling and falling when you were waking in your room, which resulted in his harshness to you, but you were too deep in your panic to notice that his gaze was more worried than angry. If Damian wouldn't have been worried and decided to check up on you... non of them want to think about it.

They spend night in your room and in the morning, they talked to you, communicating how things actually were the previous day, and expressing how important you were to them.

It was a shock to everyone. Even Bruce thought it was going fine, that your session was working and helping you, that you were feeling safe, and that your relationships with the rest of the family were getting better. And he knew that what happened damaged the whole family because they almost lost you. He regretted that he didn't phrase his words correctly, feeling like he failed to show his care for you. He knew he should have been careful with words, he knows how impactful they can be. And since he said he hadn't got time for you he started making time for you. He wants you to know that he cares for you and he will make time for you wherever you need him. His one daily check-up became 2 check-ups, and when he had more free time, he checked up more. He pays extra attention to you. Even your little sneeze will make him worried to the point of examination in a medbay. He stays with you, and sometimes talks with you, encouraging you to open up and share your opinion and feelings. He tries to lessen the influence of "bad guidelines" (that were with you because of Joker) in your head. He helps you talk through your feelings, helps you show them and process them. He reminds you that you are cared for now. And he promises that he will protect you. After hearing you out, learning your fears and insecurities, and when he learned out that most of all you are afraid to go by your father's way, he promises you that he will do everything in his power to prevent you from taking this way. Bruce wants you to be happy, to make good memories. You already got unlucky with your father, who made you experience hell, but Bruce will try to be the best Dad he can for you.

Alfred felt so guilty. He knew you needed care, but he was distracted. He feels like he let you down, by forgetting how fragile and sensitive you are. He knew you were struggling; he had seen it himself. If only he had paid you more attention. But Alfred, better than anyone else, knows that he shouldn't be focusing on the past; he needs to work on the present, and he needs to make sure you feel better. He makes sure to make you more happy while he can. It's always your favorite tea at the tea time you share, with his cookies, of course, which he bakes with you from time to time. It's always your comfort shows or documentaries on TV when you two watch something. He also makes sure no one dares to make you feel uncomfortable, even if it will make him look around like Hawk. But Alfred understands that he can't always be around; that's exactly why he makes sure that he teaches you at least a few techniques that would be able to help with worry and anxiety, and he practices them with you. You are his little star, who may be really quiet but still efficiently lights up his days, and he doesn't want to lose you. When you share that you are afraid your family will reject you, he personally goes to everyone, making sure that they won't be saying something that contains a message. He wants to see you all grown up and happy in the end; he will work hard to make sure your life in Manor will be good.

Even when Dick just heard how Damian called for help for you, he felt shocked, what to say when he saw and understood the situation. What do you mean his baby sibling tried to make their life end when he was blissfully unaware, sleeping in his old room? How? What he missed? Just a few days before, you seemed on your way to becoming the happy sunshine of a kid, and now that has happened? He is your older brother and he missed all the singes?! He needs to sit down. It's too hard to accept this version of reality for him. The reality is that he can lose another member of the family. He knows what it is like to lose a sibling, and he will never want to experience it or feel this pain again. And knowing that it's you who tried to end your life makes it all worse. He tries to understand what pushed you, trying to see what he can do to prevent this from happening. He also tries to distract you from all the negativity in your life with quality time and different activities. The incident shook him hard, and while he hoped to introduce you to cuddles differently, he had to do it now. He needs to make sure you are close, still warm, still safe, still alive. And it seemed like cuddling with him made you calmer; you didn't even realize how touch-starved you were until then. It became a sort of comforting ritual for both of you, cuddling, sometimes just cuddling, sometimes while watching something. While cuddling he often says sweet words of reassurance to you. And while he knows he can't stay in Manor forever, he makes sure you know that he is always here for you, just a call away.

Jason was mad at himself for allowing himself to snap at you earlier. He feels incredible guilt that he was the reason that you were in that state. For a few days after, he could only watch you in your room or living room until he talked about his feelings and the incident (how he calls it because he can't speak that out loud, it physically hurts him to admit it) with Bruce and Dick. He started slowly approaching you, continuing your reading sessions, but also, sometimes, he decided just to start talking with you. He shares with you his experiences in the crime alley, and you share yours; you both know that only you two in the whole family could understand the full horror of this place, and that's aside from the fact that both of you know the full horror of Joker. He says to you that you'll never become like him, because he sees you are different. Jason tries to comfort you, yet he knows he is not ideal in it, but he is willing to try as much as he can just for you. He can understand that you feel lonely; he can only imagine how lonely you get when all the family is busy with vigilante work. It got him thinking, remembering. He remembers times when he was still Robin, and sometimes, when he got hurt, he stayed in his room alone, and. he hated it. Back when Dick gifted him a plushie of a bat, and now, in another attempt to comfort you, he brings this old plushie to you. He tells you that this plushie kept him company and protected him from everything bad, and now it will protect you, and now you'll never be alone anymore; your family's love will be here for you.

Tim was second after Damian to arrive in your room. This sight horrified him. He just froze, in shock. For once, he didn't know how to act or what to do. After everyone made sure you were okay, and his brain began working again, he started to do what he knew best - investigating and researching to find ways of how to help you, trying them with you in the meantime. Art therapy? He tried to hold a few sessions with you. Special games? You both alredy beating third one. Special music? Here is his player, listen when you want. He becomes more attentive to you, noticing every little detail. He knows as a person who likes studies like him, you would want to learn more about your mental health and how to care about yours. He found a way to explain the basics of it all to you in a way that is easier for you to understand, and only when she reads articles (that he chose, of course) about mental health and coping mechanisms. You want to cuddle with him while reading? Good, he will do it (he is happy that Dick showed you how to cuddle and totally not jealous). You want to stay with him while he works? Okay, sure, he is here for you. He makes sure you can ask him anything; he reminds you that you are safe with him and with others. So when you ask about Arkham and your father there he makes sure to show you that Arkham is hard to get out (even if it's not true).

Damian didn't like how it felt to see you on the windowsill. He doesn't like how it feels to see you in this state. He doesn't like fear. But fear made one thing clear: he cares about you. He hadn't understood how important you became until that incident happened. You are his sibling, and even if he did not choose you, even if he was against the idea of you being in the family at first, now he knows you held a place in this family like everyone else. And now he knows that he will do everything in his power to make you safe; he will protect you even from yourself. He asked Bruce to install precautions in your room. He follows you like your shadow everywhere you go. He makes sure that there is no danger in your way. He checks up on how you sleep after patrols. He makes sure to be nicer when he is around you, and he heads to ask Father, Pennyworth, and Grayson how exactly to behave around you. He joins in Tim the research of ways for you to cope with traumas or ways to comfort you, and when he sees articles about how communicating with animals improves mental health, he brings Titus to you, and when he goes for walks with Titis he makes sure to take you on them too since he also found out that walks improve mental health, and since it's walking with Titus it's beneficial in double. He protects you and he cares for you even if he struggles with proving it

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Thank you for reading! Feel free to share your opinion and have a good day 💖

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Tag list :

@socially-embarrassing , @leovergurl , @deathbynarcisstick , @cryptic-arr0w , @lynns-cornerr , @cxcilla ,  @charlotteking23 , @ninihrtss , @lillycore , @pix-stuff , @tfamidoingwithmylife , @linoalwaysknows , @00hellohello00 , @lilithskywalker , @bagofrice , @lenaisaloser , @devilslittlehelper , @camilo-uwu , @l3v1us , @eyeless-kun , @stargazingbutgayer, @wpdarlingpan , @weirdothatreads , @maybea1 @lyla-viper-wayne @amber-content @lizzyzzn

if i forgot to add someone to the tag list, please let me know, and i will add you to the next part

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Spoiler:

Next chapter connected to this (click here) and after that I'll finally write about Joker's kid! reader hair dyeing adventures

[wosoloml]

crawling back to you II leah williamson x reader

warnings: toxic, hidden relationship, jealousy, angst

summary: After hiding their relationship for years because Leah was still in the closet, they eventually broke up. Yet, they always found their way back into each others lives.

wc: 1,3k I based on this request

"it´s been two years, Leah. Why are you still referring to me as your best friend and roommate to your teammates? You didn´t even tell Keira about me?! She's your best friend!" I yelled at Leah, more out of frustration than anger. I'm so tired of hiding this relationship, of hiding myself behind the 'best friend´ label.

leah being in the cloest was never a problem for me - for us. But since rumours about her dating her male best friend were a thing it as hard to keep everything private. Growing up in milton keynes it was hard to be openly gay.

"Y/n you know its hard for me to tell everyone we are dating. We both know how they reacted after Keira came out to them. She still suffers from it and i dont wanna experience it please undertstand that." leah tries to explain her situation to me and i wish i could understand her the way i want to. But im too hurt.

"I should understand you? Have you ever tried to understand me? I can't do this anymore, Leah. You deserve someone who can handle this - but I can't. I'm sorry, Lee. It's for the best if we break up."

I say the words with tears in my eyes, my voice barely holding steady. It's a hard decision, but itt's one I have to make.

Being with Leah from the time I was 14 to now, at 17, has meant everything to me. I'm so grateful for the past three years, but I just can't do this anymore.

---------

"Y/N, I BOUGHT US TICKETS FOR THE NEXT GAME AT JOIE STADIUM!"

My girlfriend's excited voice echoes through our shared apartment. It's been seven months since I moved to Manchester and three months since we started living together.

"I'm already excited!" I shout back while checking who City's opponent is. Of course - it's Arsenal.

It feels strange to be thinking about football again, especially after breaking up with Leah almost a year ago. But maybe she's not even playing anymore.

Little did I know, she's been captaining the squad for the past year.

Our seats are incredible, giving us a perfect view of the pitch. As the teams walk out, my eyes immediately land on the captain's armband wrapped around Leah's arm. A strange sense of pride swells in my chest. Playing for the Gunners - leading them - had been her dream since she joined the club so many years ago. Seeing her live that dream now brings an unshakable smile to my face.

My thoughts are interrupted when my girlfriend starts chanting loudly, her passion for the game contagious. For a moment, I forget my ex is even on the pitch.

I never told Sarah about my past with a certain blonde Arsenal player.

I could feel Leah's eyes on me the entire game.

A part of me wanted to tease her, so every time she came over to take a corner, I laughed extra loud at whatever Sarah said or kissed her deeply-just to make a point.

I wanted her to see what it felt like to be in a relationship that didn't have to be hidden. To know how beautiful it is to be loved loudly and openly.

Later that evening, my phone buzzed.

leahwilliamson wants to send you a message. My heart started racing. My eyes widened as I read her message.

'Cute little show you put on earlier today.'

I had no idea how to respond to that, so I just sent back a few question marks. It didn't take long for her to reply.

'The way you laughed extra loud at whatever that girl said. The way you kissed her while checking to see if I was watching. I don't care, Y/N' . My blood starts to boil.

----

"Y/N!!"

I snap out of my thoughts as my coworker calls my name. I hurry over to the counter, my eyes widening.

'Can you serve them? I need to make a quick call.'

I manage a nod, but then I notice here - Leah. Sitting in my cafe. With another girl.

I take a deep breath, forcing a polite smile. "Hey, what can I get for you?" I ask, keeping my tone professional.

Leah smirks. "ll have a matcha latte. And what about you, babe-?" She turns to the girl beside her. "A flat white, please. Thank you" the girl says with a warm smile.

I already don't like her.

"Give me one second"

I know exactly why Leah is here - to get under my skin. And it's working. But beneath the teasing, beneath the smug attitude, it just hurts.

Seeing her be so open, so affectionate with someone else. calling her pet names, touching her without hesitation - it stings in a way I can't ignore.

Whenever we were out together, she barely even said my name, let alone held my hand. Now, she's making sure I see how different things are.

Every time I glance at their table, Leah is already looking at me, eyes filled with something I can't quite place. But I do notice how touchy she is, how overly flirty she's being.

And it makes my blood boil. I text her 'now we are even'. Her eyes darkened as she read the message.

-------

The club was alive with loud music, the clink of glasses, and the smell of sweaty bodies. It was my best friend's 25th birthday, and we decided to celebrate it in our hometown, London. I was also hoping it would serve as a distraction from my recent breakup. After two years of dating Sarah, she ended things last weekend because I couldn't bring myself to tell her I loved her. It's not that I didn't care about her or that I wasn't in love, but things felt different. The only woman I will ever truly love is Leah. Forever.

Suddenly, someone bumped into me, spilling their drink all over my shirt. "Oh god, I'm sorry!" They said as I looked up, meeting their eyes. It was Leah. Who else could it be?

"I didn't know you were here" she said, sounding surprised.

"Yeah, it's Anna's birthday today, and I thought Id come back to London for the occasion" I replied. "What about you?"

Leah seemed taken aback by how easily I kept the conversation going. "Actually, we won the league today. It was the last game of the season against Aston Villa, and we won."

The conversation flowed naturally, and then, unexpectedly, she asked THE question.

"So, is your girlfriend here?" she asked.

"No,†I said "we are not together anymore." "Oh, really? Im sorry to hear that. Funny enough, my girlfriend broke up with me two weeks ago" she replied, a look of surprise crossing her face. I was stunned, my eyes widening in disbelief. The tension between us shifted, and an unfamiliar but unmistakable feeling of missing her washed over me.

After that, we kept texting and even FaceTimed a few times. The vibe was strange but oddly familiar, as though we had never stopped talking, despite having broken up over 3.5 years ago. Nothing had really changed.

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"Happy one year, baby!" Leah greeted me with breakfast in bed and the most beautiful bouquet of red roses. I couldn't have been happier with her by my side.

Even though she had a game on our anniversary , it didn't make the day any less special. I cheered her on from the 'Friends and Family' section, proudly wearing her name on the back of my Arsenal jersey. When she scored the winning goal, she celebrated by making a special gesture just for me.

Right person, right time.

[prettygirl-gabi]

Title: Spicy Noodles Challenge

Rating: General Audiences

Warning: paige being a tease, Paige almost losing her life.

Paring: Paige Bueckers x fem reader x Azzi Fudd

Fandom: UConn's Women's basketball

Summary: spicy ramen and sheer willpower

TikTok Live was rolling, the ring light illuminating my face as I stared at the terrifyingly red bowl of noodles in front of me. Aubrey and Caroline sat beside me, all of us mentally preparing for what we were about to endure. The rest of the UConn women’s basketball team was gathered around us, off-camera but fully invested in our suffering.

"Alright, y’all," Aubrey said dramatically, looking at the screen. "We’re doing the spicy noodle challenge, and I already know I’m not making it out alive."

"Me either," Caroline added, shaking her head. "Why did I let y’all talk me into this?"

I scoffed. "Y’all got nothing to worry about. I have a reputation to uphold."

The comments were already flying in.

@p.y.aluver: "Y/n's about to humble everyone."

@UConnsfavtoy: "Paige and Azzi gon’ clown her if she starts crying."

@Purplepaigepurples: "Why do I feel like Aubrey is gonna tap out first?"

Paige and Azzi were standing behind me, flanking either side like my own personal hype squad—and personal menace squad. Paige rested her chin on the top of my head, peering down at my bowl.

"You sure about that, babe?" she teased. "‘Cause that looks lethal."

Azzi smirked, wrapping an arm around my shoulder. "Don’t get cocky now. You know you can’t handle spice."

I nudged her off me. "Y’all are so fake. Where’s the encouragement?"

Azzi patted my back. "You got this, baby."

Paige shrugged. "Yeah. You got this, but if you cry, just know I’m laughing."

KK Arnold snickered from the side. "You already know Paige and Azzi about to be the worst cheerleaders."

"I am offended," Paige said dramatically. "I support my girl in every way."

Azzi nodded. "Yeah, we just support her… with a little bit of clowning included."

Aubrey clapped her hands. "Okay, okay, less talking, more suffering. Let’s go."

We counted down together.

"Three… two… one—go!"

I took my first bite, and immediately, I felt the heat punch me in the throat. The spice didn’t creep up—it attacked. My tongue burned, my lips tingled, and my throat felt like I had swallowed actual fire.

Beside me, Aubrey was already gagging. "Nah. Nope. I’m out."

Caroline had taken one bite and was chugging her water like her life depended on it.

I powered through, despite my taste buds screaming at me to stop. My eyes watered, my nose was already running, and I could feel Paige and Azzi watching me, waiting for me to break.

"You good, baby?" Azzi asked, rubbing my back.

I nodded, swallowing another bite. "Yup."

Paige tilted her head. "Are you crying?"

I shot her a glare. "No."

The comments were going crazy.

@paxazxyn35: "Y/N IS STRUGGLING OMG LMAOOO."

@aubreyslefttoe: "Paige just wants to see her suffer 💀"

@ynrealluver: "Aubrey is already gone, Caroline is barely hanging on, but Y/N IS STILL FIGHTING."

Azzi handed me a napkin as I sniffled. "Babe, your nose—"

I wiped my nose quickly, taking another bite even though my throat felt like sandpaper.

"She’s fighting for her life," Ice Brady laughed.

"Ice, be useful and get me some milk," I croaked out, voice slightly hoarse.

Paige raised an eyebrow. "Oh, you need something?"

I exhaled, trying to cool my mouth down. "Yes, I need milk, now."

Paige smirked, holding up a glass of milk she had magically produced from somewhere. "I’ll give it to you… but you gotta kiss me for it."

I stared at her, deadpan. "Paige. Madison. Bueckers, if you don’t hand me that damn milk—"

Azzi, bless her soul, grabbed a different glass from the side and handed it to me before I committed a crime. "Here, baby."

I immediately chugged the milk, sighing in relief as the burn subsided slightly.

Paige pouted. "Wow, Azzi. You’re ruining my fun."

Azzi rolled her eyes. "You were gonna ruin your own fun when she knocked you out on live."

I slammed my glass down dramatically, after regaining the ability to truly speak. "I WIN. I FINISHED IT ALL."

The team burst into cheers and laughter, clapping for me.

"A TRUE CHAMPION," Aubrey declared, even though she had up two minutes ago.

Caroline wiped her own watery eyes. "I don’t know how you did that."

"Sheer willpower," I said, sniffling.

Paige kissed the top of my head. "Proud of you, baby. Even though you look like you just fought for your life."

Azzi cupped my cheeks, looking at me with faux concern. "Do you regret it, though?"

I leaned into her hands, sighing dramatically. "Yes."

Paige and Azzi both laughed before kissing me on either cheek at the same time.

"Never doing that again," I mumbled, still sniffling.

The chat was blowing up with laughing emojis and comments, but the best part? The stolen kisses, the teasing, and the way my girlfriends never let me suffer too much.

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-Thank You For Reading!🩵🩶

-prettygirl-gabi🎀✨️

[genderqueerdykes]

so something that was more common in the past in queer spaces was ally pride. people were often very proud allies! they were often family members, best friends, partners, neighbors, co-workers, anyone really. maybe they just support queer people regardless. there's a lot of reasons why people support us, there's no reason to judge.

i feel like there's been this exhausting outlook on things where we have to immediately take things in bad faith because there's no way someone else had our best interest in mind. people have become very resistant to the idea of interacting with people who aren't exactly like them and it's disturbing. that is not how to approach community. that fosters arguments and drama.

also i don't like that some people don't like the idea of allies being at pride or calling themselves "proud allies" or whatever like that's not embarrassing, they should be proud, because they're refusing to hold us down. how's that embarrassing? we have to be kinder to one another. it's really over. this hostility is not where it's at. this is not the spirit of things at all. in the past it was not like this at all

there was a lot of diversity in queer spaces because they didn't really have the largest physical locations possible and often had to deal with minimal resources, so specialized groups were not always possible. generally you were mingling with everyone. you would have to just sort of talk to people and socialize. the first people i met at my college's pride group was an agender transfem person, 2 cis gay drag queens, 3 cis gay men two of which were asexual, a cis butch lesbian, a cis femme lesbian, & 2 cis bisexual women.

you just kinda talked to whoever, and that was a good thing. i saw parents, friends, kids, relatives all the time. it was super normal. like nobody was pestering you for your identity. legitimately i never came out the whole way about my gender when i was there i just tried to be gender vague and people understood. i didn't get heckled for my terms or pronouns i mostly told people i was genderqueer and they'd be like oh yeah totally. and then we'd go get sandwiches at a restaurant after the meeting was over.

there's a severe lack of connection we're having as a community right now. there's a breakdown in communication and it makes us suffer for it. i think it's time to shelve the needless hostility and just have conversations. i'm guilty of it it too. i dont want to say im excluded from this. but we need to just talk and then maybe we can get to the part where we go back to living as queer people and eating food together instead of interrogating people for everything down to what their genitals were at birth or are right now. it's time to shelve it.

we seriously do need to make room for pride and joy. the anger and rage isn't helping if it's being directed at each other- it need to be directed at people who are oppressing us, not the people we target right now. men who are allies, trans men, transmascs, male lesbians, transfems, trans women, intersex men, gay men, bisexual men, men of color, and disabled men, aren't the people who are holding us down, your target is elsewhere.

let us express joy and pride for once. it's okay to do so. it's constructive and healthy.

[eggcats]

I was originally gonna have this in the housewife au but it's funnier to me if everyone thinks they hate each other for this conversation (fighting is their love language, they both need enrichment in their enclosure).

So just, like, imagine this conversation at the hotel in front of everyone AFTER Vox and Alastor have just fought in some way.

Vox, doing something ridiculous that Alastor mocks him about.

Vox: Fuck off, you think I'm funny.

Alastor: Well, I certainly find you fun to laugh at! But I suppose that's why I find you endearing.

Vox: Y'know, I might be endeering to you, but what do I have to do to get a deer in me!

Alastor: No.

Vox: Oh, fuck off, so you're allowed to make deer puns but I can't?

Alastor: Well, only one of us is a deer, after all!

Vox: With how much of your DNA currenly in me, I'm probably like, a quarter deer right now. So I'm gonna keep making jokes.

Alastor: Are you implying you can make deer related jokes when you have my....genetics....within you?

Vox: Fuck it, why not?

Alastor: Well, then I suppose you might as well have your fun while you're "allowed," haha!

Everyone is watching this exchange in abject horror. No one wants to make a sound in case they've forgotten they have an audience. (They haven't, they just don't care.)

One time at the studio Angel almost breaks character because he overhears Vox make a deer pun to a Valentino who's extremely over it, and he realizes that he's the ONLY ONE there who knows that that means that Vox and Alastor had JUST hooked up. He can't tell anyone to suffer with him - no one would believe him, and if they did he doesn't want two pissed Overlords after him.

(One time Vox makes a low-key deer pun live on television and the entire hotel goes silent.)

[itsabouttimex2]

Not a request, just blabbering about the “not the beloved au” because. God. Poor MK. Obviously, y/n is the one suffering the most from the dynamic, but MK’s development is being stunted by the way the two kings are raising him. Never being told no, having everything and everyone live their life to accommodate around him- sure he’s still a toddler, they’re going to be stupid, but he’s resorting to hurting himself when he doesn’t get what he wants (ie Y/N, a whole person!) that is very troubling behavior.

I’d hate to see how he’d be grown up- he’d definitely still be a hero- he IS a good kid, he’d want to help people- but what happens if he’s not able to beat someone in a fight immediately or he’s outmatched? How much of him fighting would just make things worse because he’s used to the world bending over backwards to make him happy?

Poor kid.

Not The Beloved

Anon, I'm so glad you brought this up, because on surface level, NTB!MK is a little entitled menace. But when you take a moment to scratch past that unfortunate facade, then... well, yeah. He is a victim all in his own right, hard as it may be to see from a certain viewpoint. The only world MK knows is his own family and their home- his two dads, Y/N, the Flower Fruit Mountain monkeys, and the mountain itself.

The end. No school. No friends. Nothing.

And that's just the way his dads like it! Sun Wukong likes that his kiddo is isolated, stunted, socially awkward and somewhat entitled! That just makes him easier to spoil! Easier to love! And Macaque, too! If he helps to custom-cater a world that his beloved baby boy can't survive outside of? Then MK can't leave, and thus can never escape his love and care!

Which is exactly why MK needs the reader.

In spite of being everything that the little kid is not, Y/N's startling normality is the only grounding factor that MK has to let him know that something is wrong. Because Y/N didn't have the upbringing that their little brother had, they have a legitimate claim to being the least mentally-skewed of the family, which is, unsurprisingly, one hell of a boon.

Like, MK has it great... at first. Never Having to do chores or make your own food, and having your overbearing daddies brush your teeth and tie your shoes for you is awesome when you're four, but sucks ass when you're twelve and can barely function outside your role as a spoiled prince-

But! There's still Y/N!

Frustrated, jealous, and angry Y/N. Y/N, who seethes and huffs and kicks their feet and grits their teeth and punches their pillow into pulpy fluff, who curses under their breath and has to burn all the letters they write about how much they despise their family. Y/N who was only spared punishment after the scraps of those letters were found because MK cried and begged for his daddies to forgive his older sibling because-

Because Y/N, in spite of their jealously and anger, will still roll up both sleeves, sit down, and teach their little brother how to tie his shoes, how to roll up a tube of toothpaste to squeeze the last bit out, how to boil water and brown meat.

There's this normalcy to being hated by someone that anchors MK to reality, even though he's a little too young and naive to really put his grateful feelings into words, so instead it all manifests as "Y/N is my favorite person ever and ever!" that Wukong and Macaque don't like (because they are both horribly jealous) but will force Y/N to reciprocate.

And even when his beloved older sibling bullies their parents into coughing up the necessary resources in order to head off to college, MK keeps in touch with the phones he begs both his fathers to buy, and manages to maneuver them both into two strict "buts".

Specifically, "You can go off to college, but you have to keep in touch with us and MK." and "We'll foot the bill, but you have to come back and stay here during the weekends."

Which is... enough. Enough of a thread cut loose that Y/N slips free to experience at least a mildly normal life pursuing their desired field with some actual space to grow and heal and establish normal relationships outside of their toxic family.

(Even though they're definitely becoming the mom/dad friend.)

Then there's the matter of "How good of a hero will MK be without his good-natured upbringing, courtesy of Pigsy and Tang?" that you brought up, and the answer to that question is: "Don't worry about it, because MK doesn't get to be a hero."

After all, why would his dads risk losing their miracle baby?

So it isn't even "Would MK ditch a fight or otherwise give up on it when he struggles?", it's "Can Y/N bare-knuckle Red Son's cute face into pulp with only their long suppressed rage as fuel?" because MK isn't the hero of NTB- Y/N is.

And they don't ever intend on losing the new life they fought to find.

[princessmaeee]

All for Us Part VI _ Final Part Part I Part II Part III Part IV Part V

Hello Sweeties ! So as I saw in the votes, you asked for this L A S T par of this story, so there it is ! It's not that long cause I didn't had much to say. I just wanted to do a beautiful and simple end cause I think both deserve it. It wasn't a long Story, but it was long compare to everything I wrote in the last years and I'm proud of myself ! I realised later than the title is kinda bad cause I just made a bad translation from the french but the good title should be '' Everything for Us '' but I will let it like it is cause, Why not. My first Fanfiction in years, my first fanfiction I finishied since my highschool years ( 11 years at least ) and my first published Smut in Years too. Overall I'm proud of myself and I wish I will do more other stories and I hope to be able to finish them all. Thanks to everyone who followed and Love this story. I hope to see you again for other ones !

Tags : @private-vampire - @rafesbunniebby - @ultracoolnobody @chxrrybomb22

You didn't remember what happened after you voted to go home. It was the majority of you. You remembered Thanos voting X too, but after the light off, everything was fuggy. When you opened your eyes, you were on the dirty ground where you were picked when you joined the game. You had a blindfold, well you guessed it was it, who had felt it on your neck. Your feets and wrists were tied up and you could feel the cold breeze of the night. Those bastards let you in underwear in the middle of a street. Luckily for you, You noticed your clothes close to you and after a moment, trying to untie your wrist, you quickly do the same for your legs before putting on your clothes. 

Your phone was in the pocket of your sweater and of course, it ran out of energy. Your apartment keys were still in your jean’s pocket. 

You felt tired and durty. A good bath and 24h hours of sleep is going to be well deserved, but first, you need to check on something.

You go to the nearest convenient store and put your card in the ATM to take a look at your account. Your heart was racing in your chest. What if it was just a dream ? What if they lied ? 

Even if you didn't felt right to be happy, you couldn't stop smiling when you noticed the big amount of money you had in your account. Tears of joy appeared in your eyes, slowly cascading on your cheeks. Finally, The suffering and anxiety will be over. A hand on your stomach, you smiled at it.

«-I promise, You gonna have a beautiful Life…»

Once you got home, as you expected, the door locks were smashed. The guys who were chasing you for money probably entered the apartment while you weren't there.

Stressed, you opened the door and you felt sad to notice how everything was destroyed. This didn't look nice anymore, but you still have to stay there, at least until you could join Thanos or even that guy who messed up your apartment to give him the money. 

Plugging your phone to the charger, you start to clean around as much as you can. 

After a moment, when your house was clean enough for the energy you had, you go back to your phone and noticed a lot of unread messages from the guy who landed you money. Unsure, you text him back a simple ; I have your money. Let meet up Tomorrow.

You also get a Message, well, many, from Thanos. He seemed anxious about you and the baby.

“-Had you made it home yet ? “ -23h07 “-You can come to my place if you want “ 23h12 “-Or I can come over “ -23h13 “-Princess Are you all right ?” -23h20 “-I Got the money from the game. I can send you some if you want. “ -23h22 “-I know your debts are all my fault anyway…”-23h22 “-Seniorita Please answer me. Are you alright ? Is the baby’s fine ??!! ”-23h25 “-If I don't get an answer I'm going to show up at your place ! “-23h33 “-Okey I'm coming !! ” -23h45

You looked at the time : 23h55.  You smiled and answered him 

“-I'm fine, my phone Ran out of power. No need to come over. Go at your place and rest “ - 23h56 “-I want to rest with You. Gonna bring snack. What do you want ? Ice Cream and Pinault butter ?”-23h58 “-Im Fine!! And of course Not, I don't have  any weird pregnancy cravings. “-00h00 “-Not Yet ;) Anyway, still on my way…with snacks”-00h08

Your smile never left your face. Thanos was always really caring with you but somehow you feel like it was different this time, like he really made an effort and it made you happy.

When he arrived, he opened the door as you were still cleaning up the apartment. He looked around, visibly confused by all the mess around.

«-What happened here ? »

You explained to him the problems you got cause of your debts who’s also his or cause of him. Thanos felt bad you had to go traught all this cause of his addiction and helped you to clean as much as possible. Once everything was less messy, you both enjoyed some Snacks he bring and that’s when you realised how hungry you were. He bought you some of your favorite Ramen, chips and little cake. 

He also gave you an envelope with money. It was the exact amount you need to give to the guy you will meet tomorrow. He apologized and insisted you keep it. You felt touched by this and accepted his money.

«-I really want you to keep the money you get from the game for our child. And for Yourself, of course.  -What about your own debts ? -I will figure it out. And I still have some left so don’t worry about me. I want to go back to music and earn money of my own. I want to make you and our child proud. And for something else… -Something else ? Like what ? A home ? It's pretty expensive. -Well, not for a home, but it could be a plan for later. The other thing dépend more on your decision. -which is ? »

You both were sitting on your bed and Thanos got up  to kneel in front of you, gently taking your hand in his. You looked at him, breathtaking. Your heart stops beating for a second before it starts to beat faster. You could feel your eyes feeling with water.

«- Y/N would you accept to be my wife ? »

You were too shocked to answer. Tears flowing from your eyes as you just quickly nod  your head. It wasn't the romantic scene you always dream of, but coming from Su Bong it was the most romantic thing he ever did. Even if you were both exhausted, still in debts and even if you didn’t have a Ring for you, yet, this moment felt the happiest of your life. You throw yourself in his arms, still crying as you repeat ‘’ Yes ! ‘’ Again and again. Su Bong smiled and held you close, gently caressing your hair.

«-My dear and Beautifull Wife, He said before kissing you. »

This relationship with him was a total rollercoaster of emotion, but your love for each other was just too strong to let you away from each other. Faith does good things, sometimes.

The next day goes well, you got rid of your debts, Thanos started to go to therapy to avoid touching drugs again, so did you.

You moved In together, he worked on new music, new songs, starting to slowly go back on stage while you went back to school. You dropped one year ago but you chose an option you really like. It wasn’t easy with the pregnancy and Had to do a lot of school classes and take more time.

Life with your Now, fiancé wasn’t alway easy. When he felt the side effect of always being sober you fighted a lot, but at the end He apologies and you were understanding considering all the efforts he did for you, the baby and your relationship. Sometime, you fucked to avoid fighting or when Su bon needed a big high. He said you were his new addiction and even dedicated you to a song where He talks about how much He loves you and how you changed his life.

Eventually, you gave birth to a beautiful Daughter. Su bon said once he really would like to have a boy, but when He hold his little baby daughter in his arms for the first time, he almost cried and didn't let go of her. He quickly became over protective with her. He also wrote a song about her and it became a great hit. That’s how He were able to afford your engagement ring.

Your life goes back on track and you feel happy despite what you had been taught with the game. You and Su Bong got a matching tattoo with the number you were during the game as a sort of memorial for the ones who died in there but also as a reminder to yourself to be careful with your money and every decision you will take, cause you never want to live an experience like that ever again.

[chessboredom]

I'm going insane making so much fucking gifs out of that trailer but you could see how Smilk's eyes are looking away/at each other like a subtle self consciousness/subconscious guilt having to make PV suffer just so he could understand what he's going through as a Fount of Knowledge having to find out that so many things in existence is a beautiful lie covering painful truths.

"... and your entire life has been a lie... Do you regret it? Do you regret... everything?!" He is talking to Pure Vanilla, but he made Pure Vanilla dress up AS HIS PRE-CORRUPTED SELF. HE'S PROJECTIIIIIIINGG

DON'T get me started on Shadow Milk's SERIOUS face(masked slipped off) starts glitching, his hair also swept to the side, showing Pure Vanilla's face, like it's just screaming with "You will become me... as I was once you." and then goes back to his Act of Making Pure Vanilla Cookie Suffer As Much As Possible.

AND PURE VANILLA JUST ACCEPTING GETTING CRUMBLED UNDER SMILK'S HAND LIKE?? I know how self sacrificial he is, but this is him Understanding. He is SMILING.

"Will we able to find happiness?"<- the Light of Truth. "Yes, hope is the first step towards a better world for everyone. If I could win, you will too." HE *IS* THE HOPE. HE IS TRUTH IS THE OCEAN OF DECIET. HE IS THE BRIGHTEST STAR IN THE VAST EMPTINESS OF SPACE. HE WANTS PEACE FOR EVERYONE. AUGH I'M GONNA EXPLOODE,,, GOOOOD I LOVE THIS SO MUCH

[thepepsicolafams-blog]

Everyone is talking about the parallels between this new chapter of BSD (Chapter 121) and BSD Beast.

Before in the last few chapters (Chapters 115 - 120.5) were compared to the BSD Novel “STROMBRINGER”— specifically of how both Atsushi and Chuuya had lost close members that they considered friends and family to a power Ability Users that knows way more about them then they know themselves and wants them to themselves for reason yet to be known.

But now in this current chapter though, it parallels to the BEAST universe with Atsushi and fear.

Here we have “Hallucination Dazai(?)” talk to Atsushi about how he never needed to be ‘brave’ or ‘strong’ to get stuff done or fight what he fears.

The chapter talks about fight fire with fire— or in this case fear with fear as “Hallucination Dazai(?)” directs Atsushi’s attention away from how scared he is to fight Ame No Gozen to save Akutagawa because it was way he had lost a great portion of his friends/family—to the now fear losing whatever now remains of his family and friends with Lucy and Kyouka still waiting for him in the ‘Anne Room’.

This fear turns into motivation that makes him keep fighting.

Somewhat similarly, this is also seen in BSD BEAST of how BEAST!Atsushi used his fear of pain, suffering and specifically Death to become the Port Mafia’s White Reaper.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And this is just my thoughts so feel free to just skip this, but I find it interesting that this is not the first time something like this happened. Every time we saw “Hallucination Dazai” previous it said the same if not similar things to Atsushi.

I get that it's in his head, that's what a hallucination is, and he has the same thing with The Orphanage Headmaster, and I know it takes Dazai form to guild Atsushi and that’s it’s a hallucination in his mind so that it shouldn’t mean so much. But after seeing the end of this chapter I'm wondering how this will go out.

Like all I want to see now are some answers to Atsushi “Who you really are” like my guy... what do you mean!!! Is this a hallucination or something else? Is it Atsushi’s Bookmark powers telling him what to do and stuff, is it Atsushi connecting to the Book with how much it reflects to the world of BSD!Beast or is it Atsushi’s tiger powers/Byakko talking to him.

I say this because Atsushi had referred to know what this “hallucination” really is meaning that it’s not what we originally thought it was/that’s it’s not really a hallucination of Dazai but something else entirely.

Or

Is it Atsushi finally understanding what Dazai had been teaching, what he is telling him, this whole time and discoing/realizing who he really is.

Looking into himself in the picture he made of Dazai to help him keep fight to finally understand that he has a right to live, that he doesn't need to be brave to fight-- that he always been able/has been doing this and that he should stop now because some rat drew some pictures and ripped some paper.

Having that anime protagonist moments of self-discovery and finding the will to keep fighting.

Guess we just have to wait and see. Next Chapter is coming next month, and I can't wait for what happens next!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On another note, it's a very funny coincidence that when I went to the library the only BSD Novels there were that day were BSD! BEAST & BSD! STROMBRINGER-- both of which i took with me and am now reading! What a coincidence!!

[lis-likes-fics]

Keep Me Warm

Pairings: Dean Winchester x Reader Word Count: 2.3k words Prompt: Thigh fucking Warnings: NSFW, smut, swearing, alcohol use, thigh fucking, fingering, daddy kink, Dean calls reader "babygirl", aftercare... A/N: Ugh, part of this actually got me there hahaha. Thank you and enjoy!

“This is what Hell is like.”

Dean shakes his head, bringing the lip of his ice cold beer to his mouth. “No,” he takes a swig, “too cold.”

You grumble, turning over in the bed and shoving your face in the crappy pillow in an attempt to warm your frozen nose. The blankets wrap tighter around you, too thin to help as much as you need.

You start to speak, but your voice is muffled against the plastic-y feel of the pillow’s fabric. “Can’t hear you, baby.”

You lift your head. “I don’t even know how you can drink that.” Perspiration dribbles off the side of his bottle and wets his hand. surely adding to the freezing temperatures brought on by the broken motel heater.

Sam is out trying to find some hand warmers or something to help with the cold, but every convenience store he comes across is fresh out. It seems everyone is struggling to deal with the below freezing temperatures.

Dean’s chuckle is gruff. “I’ve been dealing with this for a while. Cold doesn’t beat alcoholism, sweets.” You roll your eyes, emerging from the covers to shuffle over to him. You drape yourself over his lap, curling into him to siphon some of his warmth away.

“If you loved me, you’d warm me up,” you mumble.

Dean laughs again, “Oh, baby. I have a couple ways I can warm you up, but you’d only say that Sammy will come back any second now.”

You roll your eyes, turning to lay on your back so you can see his face. He’s looking down at you, his tanned skin slightly flushed with blood in an attempt to warm his skin. He feels warm to you—Dean always runs hot. He’s like a furnace.

His phone pings, and he grabs it from where it had been thrown into the sheets earlier. “Speak of the Devil,” he says ironically. “Says he’s gonna find a Walmart to look for a space heater.”

He glances at you, bobbing his eyebrows suggestively. “That’s a good ten, fifteen minutes from here.” He leans down, one hand dropping down to the top of your head. The other finds your thigh, squeezing it gently as he smirks. “I think that’s plenty of time to warm up, don’t you?”

You shouldn’t. Sam has to suffer through your relationship enough, if he comes back before you’re done, he’ll probably just wait in the car or something while he waits. You don’t want him to catch you again, especially not when he’s doing so much right now to warm you all up.

But the way Dean’s looking at you has always been hard to ignore. The way his hand curls around your thigh, his fingers dipping down to feel you squeeze them together, is intoxicating. You lick your lip absent-mindedly and let out a heavy sigh as you concede.

“Fine, you dog.”

His smirk widens, like a predator of its own as he leans down further. He lets out a low, deep bark before swooping down to capture your lips in his own.

You moan into the kiss, nibbling on his bottom lip as he sucks on your top. Your hand reaches up to tangle in his hair. He supports the back of your head with his palm, and you already feel warmer as you soak in the heat of his lust.

He doesn't even touch you at first, at least not where you need him to. He mouths hungrily at your mouth and at your throat while his hand paws at your thighs, groping and kneading the doughy flesh with a desperation that pinpoints just why the bulge digging into your back is so prominent beneath you.

“You're terrible,” you breathe, holding him to your neck.

“I don't hear any complaints about it.” He pulls a sliver of skin between his teeth, nibbling at it with an eager hum. You chuckle breathily, the sound nearly coming off as a whimper with the way it shakes. “Fuckin’ love these thighs, babygirl.”

You feel his hand stroke farther up your inner thigh until he cups your clothed pussy. He rubs his hand against you, eventually slipping beneath your sweatpants to feel how wet you've already become.

He groans against your lips, sliding two fingers between your folds to gather your arousal on them. “Jesus, you're fucking soaked.”

You arch your back slightly, drawing his attention to your chest as he smirks. Dean's hand continues to rub up against your clit, teasing you and coaxing you as you keen into his touch.

“Take your shirt off, baby,” he instructs, his voice rough with his growing lust. You do, tugging it over your head, despite the cold of the room. You hardly feel it—you can steadily feel your body heat rising higher and higher under his hands, one on your aching clit and the other petting your hair.

Your nipples peak immediately against the chilly air. Dean leans down and laps at them, sucking them between his lips as his hot mouth makes you shudder. His tongue licks greedily over the peak, his teeth occasionally grazing and making your breath hitch.

Your hand presses against his belly, feeling the curves of his abs beneath your palm with appreciative fingers. You lift his shirt clumsily, pressing your mouth to his skin. You warm him with your mouth and hands as he warms you, keening into his touch and smiling every time his belly tenses beneath your lips.

Your kiss becomes sloppy when he presses a finger into you, parting your pussy with a thick digit that has you sighing heavily. “Oh, Daddy.”

His lips curl around your nipple. He sucks on it, pulling it taut before letting it slip out with a smack. “You like that, baby?”

You nod. “Yeah.” You spread your legs farther apart, inviting him in. He groans, pulling his fingers out of you just to pull your sweatpants off. He prods at you again before shoving then back inside at a new angle, thrusting his finger deeper inside of you and curling until you gasp. “Fuck, right there. Please don’t stop.”

He continues to support your head in one hand as the other keeps fucking into you. When a second finger stretches you even more, he attaches his lips to your nipple again with a grunt.

Your lips part and let out a tiny gasp when he starts to circle your clit. Your hips lift up into his hand, your chest presses up to his mouth. Breaths leave you with a frugality you're not sure you can afford.

“C'mon, baby,” his voice is husky, coarse. “You gonna cum for me, babygirl? You gonna cum all over my fingers? Let me feel it.”

You feel like you’ll burst. There's a deep gasp in your chest waiting to be taken as it curls and curls. Your legs tense, your belly tight as it anticipates your undoing.

Dean keeps curling, keeps coaxing. He's guiding you closer and closer, luring you, reeling you in. “You're so close, baby. Let go. Hm? Do that for me, baby. Let go for Daddy.”

It's an unfurling. Your eyes close, your brows pinch, your lips part as you inhale a sharp intake of desperate breath. The pleasure washes over you like it's trying to wipe sense from your mind and replace it all with unadulterated lust.

You grab onto his shirt squeezing tight as you try to stifle needy moans. “Ah, fuck, Daddy.”

He curls his fingers tight, almost like he's trying to take hold and lift you up, his thumb still circling. “Good girl,” he drawls. “That's my good fucking girl.”

He pulls his fingers from you, using the two, sticky from your slick, to rub at your clit some more before pulling away to smack it lightly. You shudder and shake beneath his touch, whimpering at every contact. “Yeah, you like it, don't you? Feels so fucking good, doesn't it?”

Cold forgotten, you nod and let yourself tremble as the high wanes to something that buzzes in your bones. “Yeah, yes…”

Dean leans down to kiss you, hungry and greedy as he continues to smack your cunt. He smirks every time you whimper, every time you flutter against his hand. It's somehow worse when he gropes your thighs again, his grip tighter than before. He kneads them in his palm, this insistent and possessive thing that makes him harder beneath you.

“Come here.” He moves you from his lap, lays you across the bed as he moves to stand. He pulls you to the edge of the bed, pulling a little chuckle from you as he takes hold of your legs.

“Look at you,” he coos. “So fucking pretty.” He leans over your body, pressing his mouth against yours, your throat, your collarbone. His hands grab at your thighs like a lifeline, squeezing them in his palms and groaning.

You pull his shirt over his head, rubbing your hands eagerly against his chest and his belly, admiring the strong, solid feeling of him against you. “You're abusing my thighs, Dean.”

He hums deeply. “I'm gonna fuck your thighs, baby.”

He lifts your legs, pushing them together and back. His hand rubs along your ass, the back of your thighs. A deep sound rumbles in his chest as he shakes your head and stares. “Maybe this is the real Heaven.”

“Dean.” You clench around him when he shoves his finger back into your cunt.

“What was that?” You shiver, and he laughs at you. “Yeah, that's what I thought.”

You hear his buckle clink. He pulls his pants down, watching you as he goes. His eyes, usually green as apple, are a dark forest that soaks into your skin. It makes you warm, it makes you ache.

“You wanna be a good girl for me, baby?”

You nod, raising a hand to tease your nipple with shy fingers. “Yes.”

“Say ‘Yes, Daddy’.”

“Yes, Daddy.”

He smiles. “Good. You know what you're gonna do? You're gonna hold these thighs together and you're gonna keep ‘em nice and tight while I fuck them.”

You swallow thickly, an emphatic nod of your head outlining your desire for him, to please him, to be pleased by him.

“Say ‘Yes, Daddy’.” He says it as a reminder.

“Yes, Daddy.”

“Good girl.” He kisses you—though a better word would be to say he devours you. He tastes your lips on his tongue and breathes you in like a flower.

You press your thighs together, watching as he takes hold of you, one hand stroking his cock slowly with a hiss.

You feel him slide himself between your thighs, your arousal wetting the bottom of his cock as it glides over your wet folds. He holds them close and lets out a long sigh at the feeling.

He starts out slow, like he's teasing himself with your warmth and your wetness. His brows knit together, his lips part with thick breaths.

“God, you're fucking perfect,” he groans. The blunt head of his cock presses against your clit, and a small whimper falls out. His hips jerk at the sound, quickening his pace until his breaths are heavy and shallow.

Precum dribbles from his tip and onto your belly, smearing along the inside of your thighs. You put so much focus on keeping your legs together that they begin to shake. His arm wraps securely around your legs, keeping your ankles on his shoulder as he palms at your breast with the other hand.

“Always so good for me, aren't you, babygirl? Hm?” He ruts into you, the gathering slick making it easy to move back and forth in search of his release. Each slide through your folds brings a breath from your throat, and each press against your clit makes you whimper.

You can feel his cock twitching. He leans even closer, forcing your legs back more as his measured thrusts become less steady. His breath becomes erratic, his eyes struggling to stay open.

“I'm gonna cum, baby. You gonna take it for me?” You nod eagerly, watching with lidded eyes and shallow breath.

“Cum on me, Daddy. Please, I want it.”

His thrusts stagger until you feel the warm, sticky spurts of his cum painting your belly white. He groans, the sound deep and rumbling, almost a growl as his hands grab onto whatever he can find. “Fucking Christ.”

The sounds of your breaths fill the air. You lay back against the mattress, your fingers itching for him to hold.

Dean lets out a thick breath. He admires the sight of you, heavy-bodied and covered in him. He lightly smacks your side, a little pat of his warm hand that strokes you soothingly.

He lets your legs down, tucking himself back in his pants. “You doin’ okay?” his voice is a hum, a low and gentle sound that makes you grin.

“Yeah,” you sigh. “But you're cleaning this up.”

He laughs heartily, walking away to find something to do it with. You lay there, naked and feeling much better but slowly becoming aware again of the fact that the room is freezing.

He finishes cleaning you up. You groan, turning on your side and pulling the covers back over you. “I think we should just fuck. I'm cold again.”

He chuckles deeply. “We'll put some clothes back on, and I'll cuddle you. How about that?”

You peek up at him with your best set of puppy dog eyes. “You'll cuddle me?”

He nods, his smirk curling over his lips as he gently shakes his head at you. He picks up his shirt to pull back over his head. You watch as it covers his chest. “Yeah, baby, I'll cuddle you.”

You hum, grabbing your shirt and pulling it on. Once you're dressed, you give him the space to join you under the covers. It's much warmer, and you're much happier to lay there with him.

When Sam comes back holding a space heater, his face scrunches in disgust to see the both of you spooning. “Ugh. Did you have sex while I was out?”

Without looking at him, Dean just brings you closer. You glance at him. “Fucked hard, Sammy.”

“Dean!”

[dumb-ster-fire]

Azriel x fem!reader- Period Problems Part 2

Part 1

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An hour later, YN’s stomach grumbled loud enough to rival a dying beast. She groaned, rubbing her hand over her aching abdomen, and muttered, “Alright, food. I need food.”

Azriel, who had been reading beside her, immediately set his book down. “I’ll bring you something,” he offered, already moving to stand.

YN waved him off with a dramatic sigh. “No, no. I need to move before I become permanently fused to this bed.” She winced as she pushed herself up. “Even if it kills me.”

Azriel gave her a dry look but didn’t argue. Instead, he wordlessly placed a hand at her back, steadying her as she stood.

With the grace of a wounded animal, she dragged herself toward the dining room, her body still sluggish and aching. Azriel walked beside her, his hand lightly resting at the small of her back, his shadows swirling close as if preparing to catch her should she collapse from the sheer injustice of existence.

When they reached the dining room, the rest of the Inner Circle was already there, plates still full, breakfast still in full swing.

Cassian glanced up from his mountain of food, grinning. “Well, well, look who’s alive.”

YN just groaned dramatically, collapsing into the nearest chair and resting her forehead against the table. “Barely.”

Mor raised a brow, sipping her tea. “The Fae cycle?”

YN lifted a hand weakly and gave a thumbs-up.

Rhys chuckled, reaching for a croissant. “At least you’re not suffering alone.”

YN lifted her head just enough to squint at them. “Suffering together doesn’t make it less suffering.”

Azriel, ever patient, set a plate in front of her, filled with warm food. “Eat,” he murmured, brushing his hand over her shoulder.

YN sighed, but picked up a fork. “If I die from this, I want a dramatic funeral.”

Cassian grinned. “Oh, don’t worry. I’ll make sure it’s extra dramatic.”

YN just groaned again, but as she took a bite of food, she had to admit—at least she wasn’t completely miserable.

YN took a slow bite of her food, then lifted her head just enough to look at Rhysand. “If I die from this, I want a dramatic, shiny exit.” She gestured vaguely with her fork. “None of that simple, quiet mourning nonsense. I want the sky to rain starfall, the mountains to tremble, and you—” she pointed the fork at Rhys, “—to put your High Lordiness to use.”

Rhysand, mid-sip of his tea, arched a brow. “You want me to—what, exactly?”

YN waved a hand. “Make it grand. A glowing casket. Maybe even a floating one. Dress everyone in deep, dramatic shades. Azriel will obviously be the brooding, grief-stricken mate.” She patted his arm. “You’re good at that already.”

Azriel just sighed, shaking his head, but there was amusement in his hazel eyes.

Cassian snorted. “And what about me?”

YN grinned. “You? Wailing. Loudly. Preferably on your knees.”

Mor burst into laughter, nearly choking on her tea. Feyre just shook her head, smiling.

Rhys, leaning back in his chair, steepled his fingers. “You do realize, dear YN, that if you die in such a dramatic fashion, I’d have to make sure it was the most talked about event in Prythian history.”

YN nodded solemnly. “Exactly.”

Rhys smirked. “I could arrange for a floating casket.”

Cassian grinned. “I will wail.”

Nesta rolled her eyes, muttering, “This entire conversation is ridiculous.”

YN just grinned, taking another bite. “At least I’ll die knowing I went out in style.”

YN sighed dramatically and rested her forehead against the cool wooden table. “Gods, this is hell,” she mumbled.

Azriel, ever patient, ran a soothing hand down her back. “Eat,” he murmured, his voice gentle but firm.

She just groaned into the table. “I am eating. I’m just also dying.”

Cassian chuckled around a mouthful of food. “You look like you’re about to slip into the afterlife.”

YN lifted one hand weakly, flipping him off without lifting her head.

Mor snickered. “At least she still has some fight left in her.”

Rhys, lounging at the head of the table, smirked. “Not much, though.”

YN groaned louder, smushing her face further against the wood. “I hate all of you.”

Azriel’s fingers brushed over the nape of her neck, soothing, grounding. “You love me,” he murmured.

YN blindly reached for his hand, squeezing it. “Yeah, yeah. You get a pass.” She sighed. “The rest of you, though? Enemies.”

Feyre smiled in sympathy. “At least you won’t have to deal with this for another six months.”

YN just exhaled a long, suffering breath. “Six months isn’t long enough.”

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being Viktor’s younger sibling

Viktor x sibling!reader

warnings:

a/n: im so sorry if this sucks so bad im soooo sorry its my first arcane fic

prompt: anonymous: “Hooray for open requests!!! Maybe hc for being Jayce or Viktor's younger sibling? And accompanying them to the lab?”

you and viktor never thought you’d make it out of the undercity, but viktor was gifted. he helped give you a better life

heimerdinger helped you find your place in piltover, viktor wouldn’t let you get left behind

“y/n deserves to go to a good school. have advanced classes. they can handle it.” -viktor

“i have no doubt, especially if y/n takes after you” -heimerdinger

you’d come a long way, farther than you ever thought you guys would go

“i’m glad i have you as a brother, vik” -you

“you’re just saying that because you have a nice plate of food in front of you” -viktor

“it doesn’t hurt” -you

even if viktor was your older sibling, you devoted yourself to sticking up for him

especially when you lived in zaun, since viktor was not treated kindly

“no more fighting up here?” -viktor

“i hope so, but just because we’re in piltover doesn’t magically solve discrimination. we’re still outsiders” -you

“why do you say that? has something happened?” -viktor

“just the way the people up here act” -you

you two still made the most of the opportunity with your studies, moving up in piltover

viktor soon met jayce, which you had mixed feelings of

maybe you were a little prejudiced againts topsiders still, even after all this time

“hey, who’s this!” -jayce

“viktor’s sibling, y/n. who are you?” -you

he liked you though!

you started to accompany them as they worked, especially intrigued by hextech

you were sort of an “intern” as they liked to call you

but it was worth it, experiencing something so fascinating

“y/n, stand back” -viktor…experimenting

“fineeee” -you

after some time working together, you saw a future in this

but not everyone saw it your way

you started coming around to jayce when he convinced mel not to pull the plug on hextech

“don’t act like im not your favorite” -jayce

“you’re far from my favorite” -you, jokingly

after some time, viktor grew ill and you grew more worried

you wanted to care for him but he simply would not let you

and he hated letting you see him that way

“viktor, i’m your sibling. please don’t shut me out, i won’t let you.” -you

“i’m fine, y/n. please, do not stress over my health.” -viktor

“come on, viktor. you know as well as i do something is wrong. you fainted!” -you

“yes, and i have better things to do than ‘rest’ as you keep asking me to do” -viktor

“you’re impossible” -you

“takes one to know one” -viktor

viktor pushed you away as he got sicker, leaning into his work

the hexcore was the breaking point

he showed up to your door in tears in remorse for sky’s death, you knew it was bad when he told you that you were right

“viktor, you’re not well. it’s time to rest” -you

“i don’t think i can after this” -viktor

you reached out to jayce after this incident, viktor left and you didn’t think you could follow

“he thinks you worry too much, he doesn’t want to be a burden” -jayce

“then will you help him? i don’t want him to be alone” -you

you gave him a hug and hoped for the best

but maybe he was destined to fail

you fell apart when you heard of the attack on the council, even more so when you saw viktor within the hexcore

“what did you do?!” -you

“i did what you asked! i helped him!” -jayce

you visited viktor every day regardless, usually ignoring jayce as he worked

and jayce really tried to make it up to you

“i don’t think he knows how much he’s done for me” -you, breaking silence after jayce hands you a pastry

“how so?” -jayce, timidly

“i could still be in zaun. i could be starved, suffering, and wasting my talents. but i’m here—because of him. he gave me the opportunity of education, safety, peace of mind and i feel like i failed him” -you

“i can’t imagine he sees it that way. you used all your resources and focused on yourself. that’s what he wanted for you, not to get involved in our messes” -jayce

when viktor woke up, he wasnt the same. he was a shell of himself. it caused you a lot of unease

your hug was weakly returned, and at first you thought it was just his recovery, but you soon found he was changed.

you stepped back, finally heeding years of warnings viktor had given you about worrying for him, caring for him, trying to help

you felt you were on your own, maybe it was for the best as you pursued your interests and career

and jayce went his own way pushing you away as well

but you chased him anyways and ended up in a dark, cruel world—the future viktor created

“where the hell are we?” -you

“i told you to leave! you shouldn’t be here!” -jayce

“i don’t…i don’t know where here is? you’d prefer to be alone in this?” -you

the mission changed as time went on, you loved viktor but you saw what came of the world

and jayce felt the need to try to convince you, but you’d already made up your mind

“we have to stop this. any way we can.” -you

“wha—i had a whole speech planned?” -jayce

“don’t want to hear it. viktor died when jinx attacked the council. this is…someone else’s work” -you

jayce and viktor taught you well, and soon enough you were back where you needed to be—and jayce took lead

but it wasn’t so simple, war broke out and all your hard earned time suffering in a broken timeline paid off as you fought against noxus

you watched from afar and viktor and jayce were taken from you and you felt…at peace

taglist: @summersimmerus //

[laswells-ashtray]

Oh my goodnes! The autistic ghost was so good! Just perfect. Could I perhaps slide forward....Autistic soap?

I mean this man totally has a special interest in bombs.

Get that man talking about something that he likes and he's talking a mile a minute, which doesn't bother anyone except that sometimes with his accent and the speed he talks, the others get lost in what he's saying.

Gaz gets around it by sharing snacks with him while they talk because Soap slows down reflexively. Ghost just nods along and asks questions about the sentences he actually ctaches and understands. Price worked with MacMillan for years, he's the best at deciphering Soap's rambles.

As a teenager, he never had the urge to sneak out or spend his weekends getting pished like all of his friends. He desperately wanted to enroll and was willing to lie to do it, it was the one thing he set his mind to do it. Sometimes wodnered if there was something off about him because he wasn't like his pals, he wasn't as social as them and didn't have the "typical" teenage experience. His focus lay somewhere else and it made him qesution things about himself.

Suffered a lot from "you sound annoyed" until people got used to his voice. Everyone was desperate to insist that he had to be anrgy about something because if his voice didn't sound flat then it sounded irritated according to everyone else. His passion was always mistaken as vexation. Then people would try to insist that he fix his tone because it was his fault that they made that mistake, he sounded pissed off. He was never one to succumb to that, if people didn't like how he sounded then they could fuck off.

The others have never been bothered by how he sounds, Price always sounds two seconds away form hacking up a lung, Ghost is the least enthusiastic bastard he's ever met to the point that it's comedic and Gaz just doesn't care that much.

Ask him about the difference between C-4 and PE4. Just ask him.

It's a good way to get him to snap back into awareness. If he's caught up in a task or he's just truly not paying all that much attention to something then ask him that. He'll answer before he can think about the words coming out of his mouth and then he's suddenly aware of the person he's talking to because it's an answer he cares about.

[kitsunexgari]

Summary: You have to face the fact that once you make a deal with the devil he owns your soul, and he can do whatever he wants with you. Tags: Over stimulation, forced orgasms, restraints, humiliation, Dom/Sub, Blood, biting, dirty talk, semi-dub con/non-con Notes: This is quite a wild almost AU scenario that I came up with for The Salesman. It's definitely not for everyone so read at your own risk.

"Please just let me go I promise I'll be good!" You beg pathetically. You had been chained up in this room for you weren't sure how long now. Completely naked, exposed, and shivering. You weren't sure what exactly you did now to upset him but given that he was prone to throwing tantrums or just punishing you for his own amusement it may not have been anything significant or at all. He had been appearing at random times to taunt you, tease you, but there was always denial. He knew just how to touch you to build you right up to climax before stopping. Make your cunt as sensitive as possible. 

"Let you go? Let you GOOOO?" He taunts as he steps in front of you. You gasp and whine knowing that you are in for trouble now. You shake your head and look away from him. He chuckles, his hand going right to your cunt, one thumb right on your clit once again. He's been doing this enough that your arousal is painful. More pain than pleasure at this point and yet you don't hate it...no...this is what you've been craving and somehow he always knows this. If you tell him or not. "I'm sure you just hate this, Princess..." He snarls leaning in to lick your cheek sloppily. 

You start to rub against his fingers trying to get more towards his hand, possibly force penetration but he's very good at knowing just how much to give without allowing you release, how to torture you as sweetly as possible. Your cunt is dripping wet, your arms ache. He has you elevated so your toes just barely touch the floor but you are sure that at this point you wouldn't be able to stand on your own two feet anyway. He's weakened you, left you a sobbing mess. Heaven and hell completely combined. You don't even know what you want anymore.

"Do you believe you've suffered enough?" He whispers. You know if you tell him that you have then he'll deny you again, you've been making that mistake for what seems like days. Now you know it's your chance to try to give him what he wants, say what he's waiting for. 

"No...I...I don't...." You whisper after a moment of trying to find your breath as he continues to mercilessly handle your cunt. 

"Ooooh looks like someone's finally learning her lesson...." He taunts. There's another wild laugh, so unhinged and feral. His hand retracts and he moves behind you. You turn your head trying to watch him but he growls viciously indicating that isn't something you should do. 

"Please just-" 

"Just what?" He hisses in your ear, you can feel his teeth scrape over the back of your neck, "Let you cum? Is that what you want?" 

"PLEASE!" You screech, you don't think you can take it anymore, and just as you have that thought you feel his cock shove into you. This, of course, triggers one hell of a powerful orgasm, you scream, cumming hard as your body spasms and contracts around his absolutely perfect cock.

"Tsk...tsk...who said you could do that?" He purrs in your ear. 

"I-I didn't mean to-" 

"SILENCE!" He yells, "Since this is what you want...so badly...maybe I should give you all you can take...or more..." 

"Oh God don't-" 

"Don't? DON'T! Do you really presume to tell me what I can and cannot do? Silly....SILLY little girl..." He laughs again, his hands coming around to grab your tits roughly, giving them a nice firm squeeze. You scream out and he starts to thrust, slow at first, hard enough to swing you a bit with how you are restrained. You squeal. One of his hands moving down to your cunt, to get at your clit again. 

"I'm going to take it all from you, all your pleasure...pain...you're going to wish you never craved this to begin with...." He whispers so softly that you aren't even sure he's said anything at all or you just imagined it. His thrusting increases and once again you find that he's rubbing your clit to enhance your pleasure even further. His cock feels to be amazing inside of you, hitting all the right places, everything you need to force another orgasm almost immediately. You scream. 

"More..." He snarls, "Do it again." 

"S-Stop...." You beg but you don't want him to stop, you know that and he knows that too. Even if you were genuine, you know he wouldn't and you crave that part of the experience to. The thrusting increases so do his fingers. Pain and pleasure stab through you as his cock pounds into you even harder. You've felt this before, you know it won't be the last time. This mere act milks yet another orgasm from your body. Your arms tug down at the restraints, your toes curl and your back arches, as you gasp for air. Stars dancing in your direct line of sight. 

"AGAIN!" He demands then starts to bite at your shoulder, neck, and back, drawing blood and growling like a feral animal as he licks at the wounds. His assault on your body continues. You scream. Your hands clench into fists. Another orgasm rocks your body. "That's right...milk my cock like the little fuck toy you are....AGAIN!" 

"I-I can't..." You sob, but you know you can, he knows you can, and you know this isn't going to stop until he's completely satisfied. 

"You can and you will...do you remember what I do to liars? Huh...Princess?" He warns you. You screamed and shudder your body shakes as you orgasm again. Somehow the thrusting of his hips only increases, his fingers on your clit become far more rough. You jerk and twist, writhing under his touch. The hand left on your tit gives another painful squeeze. You cum again, then once more in rapid succession, gasping for air. You whimper and whine but he's still not stopping. "AGAIN!" 

"I CAN'T I TOLD YOU I-" 

"ONE MORE TIME" He orders, "You know how much I need to fill you with my cum...and you need to work for it." You mewl softly, you really don't think you can again after that. It's all too much, you're too sensitive, tired, and he knows this as well. He knows that he can continue at this brutal pace pushing you to your limit because your body has worn itself out, at least for now. Yet, he's not giving you any time to rest. No, he wants what he wants and he's going to take it. He isn't concerned with the limitations of your body only what he can do and his desires. You will submit to them. 

The pain builds. Becomes agony. You twist, struggle, your feet trying to kick back at him. You connect a few times but it doesn't seem to faze him. He's in a zone and he wants his cock milked. You have no choice. Your hands clench into fists, your nails digging into your palms sharp enough to draw blood. It begins to drip down over your arms and wrists. You scream and beg, this is impossible, surely, how can you cum again? How can you complete this impossible task? This is insane?

Just as you are sure you'd more likely die than actually cum again, it hits you. Your final orgasm. The most intense. It takes all the breath from your lungs, your vision tunnels. Your body shakes and jerks, the oddest combination of pleasure and pain washing over you until your eyes roll back and you succumb to the dark respite of sleep...the very last sensation you experience is his burning hot cum filling you entirely. You couldn't be more satisfied with your Master.

[makeyoumine69]

Hello dear people in my beloved American Psycho fandom! I couldn't force myself to write this post because I didn't know how to do it, but I think now is the right time. I promised myself not to bring personal stuff into my writing, but since one thing affects another, I think I should finally speak up.

This year started pretty bad for me, I was suffering from a huge apathy and my mental health was probably in the worst state in the last few years. I had to cut ties with a lot of people and distance myself, and I'm really sorry for doing that, but I had no choice because I was literally dying from the inside. When I came back to Tumblr in 2022, I was absolutely alone and I had no friends, no followers and in some ways I felt calm and peaceful. I always thought and probably still think that I should be alone and isolated from everyone, like a soulless writing machine just producing fanfictions for people to consume. Maybe this is not a bad thing, because interacting with people always carries the risk of getting bruised?

Anyway, the thing that broke me completely was the news I received in the last days of January that I would be fired in February because my company decided to close the project I was working on due to the high inflation and bad economic situation in Russia. So now I have to find a job within February because I have a lot of financial responsobilities like paying for the medical treatment my family is getting. My grandmother was diagnosed with kidney cancer and her surgery was paid for by me and my fiancé, but the medicine costs a lot, so… after I told my mom about my news, she blamed me for everything. I was not really surprised though, considering that I have been having fights with my whole family for the past few months over different topics, but mostly they hate me for my political opinions. Whenever I say that I am tired of the war, sanctions and all the other stuff that 2022 has brought, they call me a fucking traitor. My family is ready to cancel me just because I told them I was tired of living in isolation, that I had even forgotten what my life was like before the war. My fiancé is literally the only person in my family who supports me, and even though I'm going to lose my job, he told me he would do anything for me, for us, but I don't want to be a burden. I'm really scared about the future, I think I really am now.

So, I'm sorry for not finishing the Christmas fics I promised to post, I'll try to finish them soon. Also, I'm sorry for not being active with fulfilling the requests and replying to your asks. I'm really sorry. And I know some of you might think that why I keep writing new series and working on different stuff while I have WIPs I need to finish—I'm just trying to follow my muse and I can say that it's really unstable these days, but I'm really trying to do my best and deliver something good for all of you!

I also want to thank all of you who have supported me with your donations! It means the world to me! Unfortunately, my account on the platform I was using for donations has been suspended because of… DOLLARS! They think I'm a scammer or something because the dollar is such a cursed currency in Russia right now, so I don't know if they'll unban my account, I hope they will.

Okay, that was longer than I thought it would be. To end this crazy rant, I just want to thank you guys for sticking with me no matter how fucked up I might be! I believe that one day I will find my way back to myself so that I can come back strong and refreshed!

[neuroticboyfriend]

after watching this video by Burn The Stigma, i realized that all the rock bottom moments i had were not necessary for me to enter recovery.

substance misuse is often a coping skill people use when they don't have or know of any other options. it doesn't have to be seeking relief from suffering, but in my case, it was. i'm disabled and mentally ill, unable to work, live with my abuser, and generally in severe emotional and physical pain.

i started using drugs to get relief from that, because despite the harm of it, it was still better than the harm i was facing and the pain i was carrying. it alleviated my suffering. the problem was it took over my life and was completely unsustainable.

i entered recovery because my use had reached the point where i was going to die. and there were many, many times i hoped i would. but when push came to shove, i still wanted to live. i wanted better - that was the entire reason i used.. to have something better than what i had before.

the point i'm making is: many people use substances to relieve what is already immense suffering. rock bottom is the point where someone's present suffering surpasses the suffering they use drugs to get relief from. from there, people make 1 of 2 choices: enter recovery (which is making ANY positive change - not necessarily becoming abstinent), or give up and die - either by continuing use hoping it kills you, or explicitly attempting suicide.

and it doesn't have to be that way. when people perpetuate the idea that you need to let "an addict" hit bottom - denying people their basic needs and their right to dignity - the only ones who survive are the ones who are able to have enough hope left inside them.

i'm grateful i was one of the people who, multiple times (due to multiple relapses), still had hope to search for better, despite the agony of rock bottom. many people don't, through absolutely no fault of their own. the society we live in set them up to lose.

if you want people to recover from addiction, you need to give them things to live for. how do you expect people to heal if their basic needs like food, medical care, and safety aren't met? let alone their human need for community, recreation, and autonomy? and just because they technically could recover anyway, why should anyone have to recover under those circumstances, if we can help it?

the truth is no one has to die from addiction without us showing them they are loved. you can't help or save everyone; that's just life. but we can build a better world - one where we actually reduce the suffering people are using to escape from, not add more suffering to someone's already unbearable life.

the opposite of addiction is not abstinence; the opposite of addiction is connection. tough love and actively making choices that push someone to rock bottom is not connection. it's a death sentence.