#JENNYS VERSION

[clumsycapitolunicorn]

"I didn't know I was gonna fall in love with you." - Jenny Calendar (Passion 2x17)

[densewentz]

Guess who's been playing Don't Starve while watching Dead Boy Detectives 💕

[hyltaylor]

THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT.

04.19.2024

[drawnfamiliarfaces]

Welcome to my life! 🤖 ⚙️ 🎶

[yourlocalabomination]

Song - Taking What’s Not Yours by Tv Girl.

(I learnt my lesson from last time so here’s the animated version in the original post)

[4sevenseas]

in new york or paris i'm a new romantic

[henrykudhirai]

tenth doctor pt 2 [pt 1 here]

taylor swift ft the civil wars (safe & sound), husborth, queen ('39), melissa border (problem area), langston hughes (I loved my friend), daphne du maurier (rebecca), michael kinnucan (the gods show up), dylan thomas (do not go gentle into that good night)

[chronic-cynic]

I've listened to the Solitaire audiobook so many times that I can lip sync any part of it, dear god.

[deconstructthesoup]

Okay, I had thoughts on forming a legit DBD Hadestown AU, and seeing as they kept me up literally all last night, it seemed only fitting that I actually write them down. So:

Charles and Edwin are, obviously, Orpheus and Eurydice respectively. However, rather than having just met and falling into a whirlwind romance, I decided that they're childhood friends who've met again and rediscovered feelings that they'd both been ignoring for a long time. Edwin is dedicated soley to figuring out why the world is dying and if he can help people while he can, and he hasn't really let himself rest, or even feel happy, in years---to the point where he feels that any good thing is too good to be true, even falling in love. Charles, on the other hand, has long since made the decision that someone has to be happy and keep spirits up in the trying times, and it might as well be him... even at the cost of his own health, as he works tirelessly on a song that he knows, despite all logic and understanding, will bring back spring again.

Crystal is Hermes, but she is also Hecate---she is the goddess of the in-between, magic, trickery, the crossroads, and restless souls... and that last part refers not only to the dead that she guides to Hadestown, but to anyone who chooses a life of wandering the road, from the honest messenger to the thieving highwayman. And yet, since the world has begun to die, she's been slowly slipping away from her role, choosing to spend her time among the mortals. This decision, of course, is helped by the fact that not only is Crystal one of the few gods who thinks there's more to the world dying than it just being "a reflection of mortal hubris," but that she's managed to make a friend in Charles. She's seen the way that music can change the world, after all, and knowing that there's at least one mortal who still has hope means that she can still believe.

Niko is a combination of Aphrodite and Dionysus---she's the goddess of love, revelries, happiness, and abundance, yes, but she's also the goddess of the mania that comes when all of those things are taken too far, and she's been dipping more and more into that side of herself as the world gets worse and worse. She wants to forget all the pain and suffering, and she gives herself and others the means to do so, even if it's all temporary. And while Niko does care for the mortals, and wishes that things could get better... deep down, she's lost a lot of her old hope, and even she can't disguise the fact that she's living with a broken heart.

Monty is Persephone, but he's also Apollo---he's the god of rebirth, prophecies, the stars and the earth, and new beginnings... and for what should be half of the year, he rules over the dead. He used to find just as much joy in watching over the souls as he did creating spring with Niko and charting the stars to bring prophecies to the mortals, but as Hadestown gets more punishing, more people die up above, and the world just gets worse, Monty grows even more bitter and closed off. He's unable to even properly enjoy his time on the surface, knowing full well that he won't stay for six months like he should... and the man he loves is wearing his patience thin.

The Cat King is Hades---and yes, somebody did make a very compelling argument for him being the Fates, but it works for the story, so just hang on. Once upon a time, he was happy just ruling over souls and managing the afterlife, and he cherished the time he spent with Monty as much as he could. But over time, wealth became added to his already vast domain, and his fascination for making and collecting things became an obsession... in no small part due to the fact that those six months spent away from Monty started to weigh incredibly heavy on him, and he eventually loses himself in his effort to replicate everything his husband loves about the upper world as it dies along with the way they used to feel about each other. Not to mention, his old empathy and compassion for the souls has hardened into cold indifference at best and a sick enjoyment of their suffering at worst. And all this change is making one person in particular very happy...

Esther is the Fates, but she's also a version of Demeter---the goddess of nature and all of its love and cruelties, and the one who spins everyone's path on her loom, punishing those who dare to stray from what she has determined for them. She's despised the Cat King for years, ever since he whisked Monty away to Hadestown, and she wholeheartedly believes that the reason the world is dying is only because he's been keeping Monty down there for too long, not because they've begun to fall out of love. So, when Esther spins a tale of a pair of lovers who are destined to end tragically, she sees it as an opportunity to finally push the Cat King and Monty to the breaking point---to save her son and the world, she tells herself, but mostly for revenge.

[that-butch-archivist]

"Tess was a performance artist and part-time jewelry maker who now worked as a set designer. [...] The first night we spent together, I taught her to knit — my classic seduction technique (High Femme Camp Antics, or HFCA) — and about frisson, that carbonated feeling that accompanies a crush. We stared at each other for a long time, unblinking. Because I knew that this otherwise might take forever (lesbians!), I finally asked Tess point-blank if she felt a frisson for me (HFCA). In response, Tess kissed me hard, with teeth. I knew she wanted to fuck, but I pushed her hands away dramatically when they crept under my skirt (HFCA). I told her that I didn’t typically sleep with people so soon (HFCA), which was true not for any real reason but because I was privately humiliated by my body (HFCA). Instead of letting her fuck me, I scratched Tess’s entire torso with my long, pink fingernails (HFCA). “Her fingernails drifted down my neck, across my shoulders,” Jess Goldberg, the butch narrator of Stone Butch Blues, says of a high femme whose camp antics thrill her. “I’d forgotten the sheer pleasure of a high femme tease.” “Your fingernails are full of frisson,” Tess said as morning light began to stream in through the window above her bed. “I know,” I said. I recently read a collection of funny stories by Lesléa Newman, high-femme chronicler of dyke life in the 1990s (the materialistic, shopping-addicted Golden Age of HFCA). In one story, a butch named Flash arrives to pick Lesléa up and take her out to dinner. Flash politely tells Lesléa that she looks nice. “The average femme would have taken that to be a compliment,” Lesléa dishes. “But this high-maintenance femme hadn’t spent the last two weeks shopping for the perfect outfit and the last seven hours bathing, shaving, bleaching, filing, polishing, combing, brushing, drying, moussing, spritzing, spraying, and applying five pounds of makeup to have all her efforts summed up in one little four-letter word.” Flash’s flimsy compliment doesn’t satisfy Lesléa’s desires to be seen, appreciated, and worshiped, and so Lesléa starts from the bottom and works her way up, prompting Flash to compliment her shoes, her miniskirt, and finally her hair in a grand, shimmering pyramid of HFCA. But even as she performs satiation, Lesléa is insatiable. Her antics fail at getting her precisely what she wants from Flash, because there’s always something unsatisfying about getting what you want by asking for it. Lesléa’s desire glows from within the frame of her HFCA, distilled and exposed and unmet. Can I Come Inside, my high-femme sex game, deals primarily with unmet, outsourced, and circumnavigated desire. In Females (2019), trans lesbian critic Andrea Long Chu argues that femaleness is a universal, existential condition rather than a gender or a sex — a condition of being and of consciousness that involves letting others do our desiring for us. At stake in Can I Come Inside, as well as in HFCA at large, is a femaleness that both craves and rebels against its tendency to outsource desire. In playing Can I Come Inside, I, like Lesléa, ask Tess to do my desiring for me, and Tess in turn defers her desire to me: the game is strictly my desire, one that she insists she does not share. Even though it mandates a performance of aggressive desire from Tess, there’s no doubt that Can I Come Inside is about my desire; it’s my game; I make the rules."

-- An excerpt from "High Femme Camp Antics," an essay written by Jenny Fran Davis. (Emphasis in bold my own.)

[clumsycapitolunicorn]

All my mornings are Mondays. Stuck in an endless February.

[oceane4loveu]

How to be self-confident? (୨୧ᵕ̤ᴗᵕ̤)

☆ External Confidence

Fake it till you make it! Outward confidence is about projecting a confident image to the world. It’s about mastering the art of “faking it until you make it real.” Stand up, don’t be afraid to look people in the eye and use positive body language! These tips are perfect for fooling others into thinking that you are a very confident person, even if you are an introvert. are naturally shy or But remember, outward confidence is just the tip of the iceberg.

☆ Internal confidence

the real treasure! Internal confidence is where the magic happens. It’s about accepting your true self and trusting your own opinion. No need to seek approval from others before posting that stunning Instagram photo. Your opinion matters, and if you like it, that’s all that matters! By trusting your instincts and judgment, you build unwavering and lasting confidence. It’s about saying, “I’m confident in myself and I’m proud of who I am.”

☆ Key Takeaways

❦. External confidence can help you impress others, but it's not always enough. Don't let it define you.

❦. Cultivating internal confidence takes practice. Start by believing in your own opinions and choices.

❦. Embrace your uniqueness and celebrate your individuality. You don't need validation from others.

❦. True confidence comes from within. Ilounge is about accepting yourself fully and having confidence in your abilities.

[haunthouse]

text from the lyric booklet of jenny from thebes:

JENNY USED TO LET ABSOLUTELY ANYBODY CRASH AT HER PLACE. IT WAS LIKE A YEAR-ROUND CHRISTMAS MIRACLE. IF YOU HAD ANY SECRETS, SHE DIDN'T WANT TO KNOW, AND THE ONES SHE HAD SHE KEPT TO HERSELF. THERE WAS A WALL HEATER DOWN AT ONE END OF THE HALLWAY AND A BIG, DARK LIVING ROOM AT THE OTHER. ONE ELECTRIC LAMP BY THE COUCH IF YOU NEEDED IT, ALL EXITS VISIBLE TO THE EYE FROM THERE. SOME OF THE PEOPLE WHO HAD NEED OF JENNY'S PLACE WERE ALL RIGHT AND SOME WEREN'T EVER GOING TO GET RIGHT, AND SHE'D ALREADY GOTTEN SEVERAL LETTERS FROM THE CITY ADVISING HER TO KEEP A LOWER PROFILE UNLESS SHE WANTED TROUBLE BUT THEN I ENTERED THE PICTURE. BAD LUCK. LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE WHO CAME THROUGH I WAS TRYING TO FIND A BETTER DIRECTION BUT IT DIDN'T WORK OUT THAT WAY. PRYING EYES SHOULD HAVE TENDED TO THEIR OWN BUSINESS. PEOPLE DON'T THINK TOWNS LIKE OURS CAN TURN INTO BATTLEGROUNDS BUT WE HAD A WAR HERE. THERE. I DON'T LIVE THERE ANY MORE EITHER. I LEFT WHEN JENNY LEFT. IT'S JUST A SPOT ON THE MAP NOW. WE RODE TOGETHER FOR A WHILE BUT THEN WE LOST EACH OTHER. SOMETIMES I THINK I HEAR FROM HER BUT OTHER TIMES I THINK I'M JUST DREAMING. NOBODY KNOWS WHERE ANYBODY LANDED. YOU DON'T KEEP IN TOUCH WHEN THE WAR DOESN'T GO YOUR WAY.

transcribed above in the original all-caps, but here's a regular text version for easier reading:

Jenny used to let absolutely anybody crash at her place. It was like a year-round Christmas miracle. If you had any secrets, she didn't want to know, and the ones she had she kept to herself. There was a wall heater down at one end of the hallway and a big, dark living room at the other. One electric lamp by the couch if you needed it, all exits visible to the eye from there. Some of the people who had need of Jenny's place were all right and some weren't ever going to get right, and she'd already gotten several letters from the city advising her to keep a lower profile unless she wanted trouble but then I entered the picture. Bad luck. Like everybody else who came through I was trying to find a better direction but it didn't work out that way. Prying eyes should have tended to their own business. People don't think towns like ours can turn into battlegrounds but we had a war here. There. I don't live there any more either. I left when Jenny left. It's just a spot on the map now. We rode together for a while but then we lost each other. Sometimes I think I hear from her but other times I think I'm just dreaming. Nobody knows where anybody landed. You don't keep in touch when the war doesn't go your way.

text on tracklist:

CLEAN SLATE — New arrival at the safehouse GROUND LEVEL — There was, en route to greener pastures, a small house in the city ONLY ONE WAY — They consider one another in the often harsh light of how the world is FRESH TATTOO — She commemorates her present station on her forearm CLEANING CREW — The next best thing to an actual goodbye MURDER AT THE 18TH STREET GARAGE — Behold, you may not rezone my house --- FROM THE NEBRASKA PLANT — The future, seen from a hard place SAME AS CASH — she trades in her old car and buys a Kawasaki GPz 750 Turbo WATER TOWER — She disposes of the body JENNY III — The future, seen with great clarity GOING TO DALLAS — As far as anyone's concerned GREAT PIRATES — The future they both deserve

[lemonyinks]

One down, five to go. Jenni requested by @radioactive-earthshine

[chrswlls]

man i think i bought the wrong game

[baseketballer]

BASEketball (1998) on DVD

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