the delicious subtext of charlie's terror that vaggie might leave her and implication charlie knows her dream of the hotel isn't enough anymore if vaggie isn't sharing it with her, yum yum yummm
no girlfriend while watching the hazbins finally bond and she's miserable
girlfriend comes back and charlie can smile again
the fact that this was important enough to SHOW specifically charlie being sad without vaggie even while everyone else is going well
we could have had her eagerly watching the hazbins and brush off vaggie's sorry without even looking at her, could have had vaggie seeing her be so happy and vaggie relaxing bc this time she didn't actually mess up too bad after all and charlie's happy so
INSTEAD we get charlie giving the gf space as asked, but wanting vaggie back more than anything. and when vaggie does come back..
her trying to apologize freaks charlie OUT, no no no she DOES NOT WANT she stops vaggie so SHE can say sorry TO vaggie, something happened on the roof that was bad and hurt vaggie and clearly charlie's had to sit with feeling like this is her fault
and she's finally able to touch vaggie without vaggie turning away like she kept doing on the roof, so that's SOMETHING
but charlie's still not sure. Vaggie's still sad, isn't smiling
hearing charlie take the blame isn't what vaggie wants. it's not making her happy to hear it
so charlie pulls away, turns away, takes some space herself and
goes for honesty. Bubbly bright side charlie admits things are harder than she thought they'd be and turns back saying "but we'll figure it out" with a cringing smile that has a question in it
will they?? does vaggie still want to try???
she's just heard that being with charlie means vaggie feels like she has one purpose and seen her start cracking at the edges when she 'fails' it, a pain she doesn't want charlie's help with, and that obviously hurt and scared charlie and had her stammered and fluttering in panic sure but worse than THAT, the actual question charlie has coming out of all this is... will vaggie... stay?
charlie's giving big "seriously scared of being alone again but this time after losing the person who'd finally 100% seemed to believe in her" energy here guys
but by the time she says "Together" vaggie is smiling at her, smiling so soft
this is what she wanted to hear. what she wants too
just them togther
LOOK at charlie SPrINTING OVER when she sees that!!
with her own huge smile the moment vaggie looks okay again, looks happy to be here with charlie again, and charlie can grin with her hands on vaggie's shoulders and NOW she can point out how the day didn't go that bad, slight trauma uncovering and relationship canon bomb aside
but before that
charlie checked in, checked vaggie wanted to be with her and figure things out together no matter HOW the rest of the hotel was doing
bc that's what was most important to charlie at the end of this day
me, sticking a swizzle straw in this subtext like it's a smoothie: show me more of your abandonment issues charlie morningstar i KNOW they're in there (sluuuuuurp)
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we talk a ton about the almost kiss, and really, there are a dozen layers of intimacy you could talk about regarding this scene, but one of my favorite things is this hand-hold right here - the tender way in which he grasps her hand, the juxtaposition between his sharp claws and the gentle nature of his touch…it is so good. and him squeezing her hand and lifting it up as they lean in?? dare i say perfection, sota’s interruption notwithstanding.
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as a masc, there's something about interlacing my fingers with a femme's that is so personal to me because the contrast of our hands, the shape and feel of them, look so good together. something about my blunt nails and angular fingers against your painted nails and softer hands is so precious and gorgeous.
we're two separate beings, but then we can be in a state where we're so wrapped up in each other we can hardly tell where we start and end, yet here, with our hands clasped, i see how different we are, yet so wholly connected we remain.
i think about rubbing my thumb over the curve of her thumb, slow and steady, just so she knows i'm here, that i'm a constant. i think about holding out my hand asking do you trust me? and she might say yes and i'll hold her hand like i'm a knight, a prince, asking her to dance. my thumb will swipe over her knuckles, and my lips will brush against them too. my lady.
it's the most minimalistic way to be physically touching, and i think it's beautiful that there are so many different ways and reasons we can be holding hands.
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