#It feels like you're being mean and selfish.

[bnyf]

fawn over you ♡

yandere hunter x fawn hybrid reader

warnings : yandere content and themes, unhealthy behaviors, relationship and relationship dynamic

authoress note : first post :3 lowkey inspired by 'my sweet bunny cage' manga and i'm planning on making a bunny hybrid one too

his heart almost imploded and gave out upon sighting such a delicate, dainty fawn such as yourself.

little ole you had him in a rhapsodic trance, him whom's nature greatly differed from hers (you).

he, a mere man who's psychological disturbances causes him to hunt and kill. and you, a lovely creature who now gained the attention of a brute man who's main objective was to capture and claim.

the pattern on your skin like pearls, little dots trailing you. so perfect, almost impossible yet here you were.

it didn't help that by the beautiful white lily of the valley flowers surrounded you, like it was a symbol of how fucking perfect and graceful you are. you were ethereal. an angel or a goddess.

and god, those beautiful glassy orbs peaking his way held nothing but the universe and more in them. so innocent. the epitome of pretty and perfect.

he's sorry you had to meet him of all people, someone who'd ruin and corrupt you but he'd also worship you, others may do much worse to you anyway.

his movements were so still that you'd only notice him due to your instinctive feeling of being watched. your tailed and ears twitched.

you shivered, feeling bare and open to such preying eyes with selfish intent behind them.

his eyes held such a mad and malicious look, as if he were some sort of barbaric mad lad. he looks honcho and quite the opposite of you whom had a much smaller and soft physique.

his whole aura wrecked of death, he is, without a doubt, a true blood lusting predator's, a troubled psychopathy who needed to take his frustrations out on poor, unsuspecting creatures.

with that in mind, and thanks to your nimble agility and speed, you darted off before he could even approach you from the shades of the trees only 10 feet away from you.

he'd only chuckle to himself, engulfed by your beauty and elegance, and more than intrigued by the pretty, little doe-eyed fawn hybrid he just had the pleasure to encounter.

sure. you're quick witted. but being quick only gets you tangled up in a trap quicker.

and with that, his infatuation steadily mounts. he immediately started littering the leafy forest grounds in traps ever since that faithful encounter.

you've taken extra precaution after that day, hiding far away from his cabin and even further from that specific meeting sight.

like a lethal game of hide n seek, you both played your parts. and just like that, you started feeling more unsafe and uneasy knowing that he'd set up traps and cameras, watching your every move, both during the day and night.

sure. he had a life outside of this secluded forest he loves visiting. which is the only thing really giving you time to run and hide.

his work life was distressing as a lawyer, it was a very mentally, emotionally and sometimes psychically taxing line of work.

but that don't mean much considering whenever he got time or a day off, whether late night or not, he'd clear out an entire section of the forest with traps and cameras.

and eventually, you run out of both stamina and luck. you become dreary and tired, exhausted from fearing for your life. and your little stalker becomes impatient.

your little game of cat and mice becomes long over due, and sooner or later, you find yourself injured and trapped in enemy's territory.

it only takes 12 hours for him to finally come off work and whatever other things he may be preoccupied with in his life to come get you.

mean time, you kept your wound clean by licking it, fearing what he'll do to you once he gets there.

and boy oh boy, were you shivering when you'd hear the sound of twigs cracking under heavy boots approaching in the darkness of the light midnight. he's here.

you already cried a lot from the pain and realization of your situation but that didn't stop you from repeating the whole process again.

tears already brimming at your swollen, red eyes. the light from his flashlight becoming brighter as he gets nearer, near enough to shine the light directly at you, in your eyes and blinding you from seeing him.

yet he could quite clearly see you, those teary innocent eyes, your wound. every detail up close right in front of him as you lay right in his trap. looking at you with a sinister smile which you cannot see, leaving you guessing what smug facial expression he must have right now.

he let out a feral, maniac laugh.

"my little fawn, you're finally mine."

you had no where to run or hide anymore. grasping onto what little sanity you have now and praying for whatever great deity above to have mercy upon your innocent soul.

what awaited you next was a life of constant torment. the tears run off your chubby soft cheeks, colliding with your skin and the snot in your runny nose made the whole ordeal pathetic and shameful for you.

but to him? it was such an exquisite show! to him... that disgusting crying face of yours was nothing short of adorable.

he grabbed you away, kidnapping you from your carefree life of freedom. the last thing you felt was a prickling sting on your neck before you were enticed with an unknown sleeping drug that took effect instantly.

all the stress and negative emotions that were building up inside subsided as you were knocked out cold, remembering only his footsteps as he carried you to your new home...

the rest of your days were all a painful blur, you were cared for yes but you'd now have shackles placed on your ankles, a big enough cage and a collar. forced to comply to whatever rules he'd put in place for you. punished when disobeyed those rules. dressed to his liking, feed like a child and forced to learn tricks for his entertainment.

for lack of better words, you've been reduced to a pet.

his pet

your leg wound was still healing, which made escaping difficult. worse yet, his home in the city was large and difficult to navigate, with a built in security system that is literally impossible for anyone to get in or out without permission.

"shhhh don't be so scared, you're safe with me, my little fawn," he'd coax, all while keeping you sedated and locked up. you don't know why but for some reason he'd smell strange but also strangely good at the same time. you'd feel a bit oozy when around him, and inhaling his scent was addictive.

that's because his cologne is laced with pheromones and a special drug to get you addicted off him.

but you didn't know that, and you didn't need to know that. your innocent self blamed yourself for becoming addicted to him. he only smiled and hugged you, because he knows you can't think straight every time he's near.

keep this up and he might just send you into heat a little too early. not! that it's a bad thing for him, not that he wouldn't like that of course.

you hated every bit of this. hated him for making you into his glorified object rather than a living being, a person with thoughts and feelings.

but oooohhhh how he loved every second of it, loved dressing you up in all sorts of cute clothing like some little doll, loved pulling your collar when you misbehaved, and absolutely adored watching you get high off him.

the way your nose twitched, and your little tail sweep from side to side, that look you give him cause you're thinking this is all your fault when it's absolutely not.

[b0kevi]

try. | Jamil x gn!reader

summary: y/n’s heart aches for jamil but knows they can’t be together, can jamil really love y/n the way they love him

trope: slight angst, fluff happy ending, in denial, love confession

info: “I think… I can love you.” prompt, gender neutral reader they/them pronouns, long cringe love confession

characters: Jamil Viper, Kalim mentioned

w/c: 1115

· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·

A part of you knew what you were getting into. You knew it wasn’t going to work out the second you sensed something, but the heart wants what it wants.

and for some reason, your heart wants jamil.

the dashing mysterious servant from scarabia.

your brain told you to stay away from him, not because he’s mischievous no, because he has enough on his plate. you doubt he has time for romance or if he even thinks about romance.

your brain told you to stay away and let him go but your heart told you otherwise.

you ended up getting closer to the vice warden and sharing chores with each other, basically spending any free time you can at scarabia to hang out with him and help him out.

every minute you spent with him, the louder the voice in your heart got. you were being greedy, selfish to wish that he would love you like you love him.

“something on your mind?” you were doing it again. getting lost in his movements, so memorized by the way he moves in the kitchen, he doesn’t even need to use his signature spell for you to be captivated by him.

“oh, it’s nothing.” you were supposed to be washing dishes as jamil prepares for dinner but as days go by your feelings grow stronger and you really thought this would be easy to hide but it’s starting to hurt a lot more than you thought.

“really? because it seems like you're somewhere else.”

Jamil already finished preparations and made his way to you before having to take the food out, he nudged your shoulder a bit to grab your attention. just with a single touch you could feel sparks running through your body.

“sorry, it’s just been a long day... you know how it is.” you finished washing the last plate and dried your hands, speaking up before he could.

“why don’t we take this food out? I'm sure everyone’s starving.” grabbing plates to hide from his glaze.

𖥸

“delicious as always jamil.” you smiled as you took a bite. after you guys fed everyone else, you two went to the kitchen for some quiet time to eat your own dinner.

Jamil chuckles softly, “it’s nothing special…”

you stare at him, how could he not see how wonderful he is. how you wish you can tell him how amazing he is, you could spend the rest of your life singing him praise just so he can see how special he really is.

𖥸

“is there… something you want to tell me y/n?” This made you jump as you handed Jamil your plate for him to wash.

“hm? what do you mean?” you played off, Jamil could tell something was bothering you, you were so quiet and distant with him today, it was unusual. He noticed it’s not just today you were distant, the last couple of weeks you’ve been quiet, still helping him but not yourself. he could use his snake charmer to figure out what was going on but he felt wrong to do that, he wanted you to tell him yourself.

Jamil sighed as he leaned against the counter, “you’ve been very distant and have been staring at me quite a lot lately… have I done something?” you can take it anymore you can feel your heart about to burst.

“Jamil… I have to tell you something.” he knew it. you motion him to sit down which he hesitantly did.

“just… hear me out okay? I know this might be a lot and you might hate me but I need to say this.” you started out, squeezing your hands and taking a deep breath before staring into Jamil’s grey eyes.

“Jamil… I love you. I've loved you for so long and I tried so hard to push these feelings away and let you do your own thing but I couldn’t. I couldn’t stand being away from you, I'm drawn to you jamil. you’re so amazing that I wish you could see that yourself. you’re such an incredible and hard working person that I can spend the rest of the days telling you how wonderful you are just so you can believe it yourself. I know you're just a servant but that doesn’t matter to me, I don't care, I love you jamil and I understand if you don’t feel the same, I know you have a lot of stuff going on which is why i didn’t want to tell you but i had to. i understand if you don’t want to see me again…” you finished your rant as you felt like you’re about to burst into tears but you held it in.

Jamil had a deep blush on his face and blank stare and he digested what you just said.

Jamil had so many thoughts running through his head, he never thought anyone would feel this way about him or if he deserved this kind of love. you were right, he did have a lot on his plate, he didn’t know if his family would allow him to have a partner or if he was ready for one, how would he provide for you? He already has to take care of kalim, could he take care of the two of you?

you took his silence and avoided gaze as his answer and turned to make your way to the door.

“w-wait-!” Jamil frantically stood up and grabbed your wrist, he looked so puzzled and flustered.

“jamil you don’t have to say anythin-“ Jamil interrupted you before anything.

“I think…I think I can love you.”

Jamil could think of the consequences or what ifs later but what he knows right now is that he feels good when he’s around you. He doesn’t feel like a servant at someone’s beck and call, he feels free and he likes being around you. If this is love then he definitely thinks he can love you.

“I know I don’t come from a lot but I can definitely love you if you give me a chance to prove it.” his hand moved to hold yours.

that’s it. your heart just exploded, you jumped at him and crushed him with a hug making you both fall to the ground.

you kissed his cheek and all around his face, “yes! i don’t care about anything else i just want you jamil!”

jamil let out a genuinely laugh as he sat up holding you tightly as if you were going to let go and change your mind. he held your face gently, looking deep into your eyes, “I promise to be there for you and show you love Hayati.”

“Me too Jamil.”

· · ─ ·𖥸· ─ · ·

hayati = my life

a/n: I’m not arabic and I used google to translate ^ idk i saw that prompt and immediately thought of jamil for some reason, idk how to feel about this lol have a good day/night ! take care <3

[angelsdean]

hot take maybe but actually i do expect my mom to comfort me and make me an ice cream sundae when i’m sad even when i get to 40 and she’s 70. my grandma does that for her still. it’s not. limiting her. it’s not saying she only has to be my mommy. i have taken care of her too. it’s saying we love each other and want to take care of each other. mary struggling to be able to interact with grown up sam and dean was very very valid and understandable and i love her for it. she also could’ve maybe tried a little more anyway. they could’ve lent on each other. idk.

Yea i've said before that I think it's a bit outrageous the way people seem to think someone stops being a parent once their child reaches adulthood. Maybe it's a cultural thing, I don't know, but the whole idea of "once your kid turns 18 they're out the door and not your problem anymore" is so deeply flawed IMO. But yea I focus more on "debunking" the claim that Dean expects some sort of motherly coddling / babying from Mary because that seems to be the deancrit take I see the most with regards to this arc / the "i'm not just a mom" scene.

But for sure many people seem to have some weird ideas IMO about what it means to be a parent. Like I think you can feel for Mary and understand that parents can and are more than just parents, but also understand that they will never stop BEING a parent either. Their kids will always be their kids. It's why people always say being a parent is a full time job, not something to go into lightly, that you should be sure you actually want kids and understand that having them is a lifelong commitment etc etc. And having kids makes them become your priority, even when you want to be selfish you always have to try to put them first. Obviously that lessens as they grow up but like, if your adult child were injured or had some kind of health issue / challenges as a parent it's still your job to be there for them, to support them, to care for them. That doesn't just end at 18. It's why *I* know that even though I like the idea of kids I probably never will have any because it's so much responsibility and because those kids are always always going to come first, forever! That's kind of part of the parental "contract" IMO. And even when they're adults, a parent should still be the one person in the world your kid can turn to, rely on, seek comfort in.

And I understand these expectations are complicated in this particular narrative by the fact that Mary died young and is not equipped to be a mother to adults. I think that's such a delicious component that I wish they leaned into more. She is grieving her babies. She is allowed to feel those feelings and feel confused and unsure and struggle with accepting this new dynamic with her children. But a big part of Mary's arc in s12, which culminates in 12x22 with "I need you to see me" is that she is the one stuck in the past, needing to accept her reality and "SEE" her children for who they are now. That's what the arc is moving towards, that acceptance. And after s12 we see her and Dean have a better relationship. We see her still getting to be Mary the person AND Mary the "mom." She hunts, she comes and goes, but she's someone Dean can talk to, share a meal with, spend time together. It's what he always wanted most. He tells her in 14x11 that "just knowing you're around, that you're alive has meant everything to me."

Anyways, I won't ramble about all that again because I've made a bunch of posts about it already. But yes, I think it's normal for Dean (and Sam) to want Mary to comfort them, do nice things for them, the way any parent or really a family member in general might do. They are not asking for kisses on their boo-boos and getting tucked into bed with a bedtime story, which is how a lot of deancrit posts read. What they want is some sort of familial reciprocal care. Like the way Dean spends quality time with those he loves. The way he baked a cake for Jack. Cooks for his family. The way he gives people gifts. The way he fixes Cas's truck. The way he calls to check in on people. He doesn't do these things out of some obligation or playing some "role", he does them because he cares. Because he loves his family, and that's just what family does for each other.

Someone in my tags last night said it very well that what Dean really wanted was just, another family member, to spend time with, to share their joys and burdens with. Someone like Bobby, that he could turn to if he needed. Bobby was a parent figure but he wasn't "parenting" them, y'know? He was someone Dean could lean on, but he didn't expect Bobby to shoulder all his burdens. And I think that's what Dean wants most. Just someone he can lean on and rely on, since he's been having to be the strong one for everyone his whole life.

[lamentationsofalonelypotato]

I whole heartedly agree with @luci-in-trenchcoats and @waynes-multiverse

This was completely uncalled for. There is no reason to be rude or salty to ANYONE and especially not Alex. She doesn't have to do anything! It's not her job to read fanfic and make you feel better about yourself! She reads fanfic because she likes it, not because she gets paid to do it! It's why we all read fanfic- it's a creative expression of the worlds that we love so much. It's SUPPOSED to be FUN. And Alex shouldn't have to explain or reason to anyone why she chose to read a fic.

Second, friendship isn't contingent upon reading fics and shouldn't be. NEWSFLASH, friendship is supposed to be unselfish! It's not friendship if it's selfish- and being friends with someone just so that they'll read your fics isn't friendship- it's MANIPULATION. Alex can, AND DOES, still love and support all her friends without reading their fics!!! Goodness knows I literally feel terrible about not being able to read other people's fics fast enough, but that doesn't mean I don't love and support them!

THIRD what on earth are you talking about that she doesn't credit/support other people's fics?! The reason Alex has so many friends on here is because she LITERALLY gives the most detailed and kind comments no matter how short or long the fic. Because she LITERALLY finds one thing inside each fic that speaks to her and then makes the writer of the fic feel like a boss for writing it that way! And even if she doesn't read the fic, she still reblogs so other people can enjoy it and so that the fic can get traction! And, I've NEVER NEVER seen Alex say one terrible or toxic or rude thing about something she's read. She is literally one of the kindest people on this site, who creates wonderful work and always, ALWAYS, supports other writers!

@zepskies Please do not let this anon get you down. You're a wonderful writer and an amazing friend 💗💗💗

Don't you think you should give more credit to all the writers you so call friends? You seem pretty biased...

lol Congratulations, anon. I think you're the first person to send negativity to my inbox.

Here's a tip: if you're going to say something bold, be bold and say it to me non-anonymously.

2. When I have time to read fanfiction, I read the stories that call to my attention, whether they're my mutual or not, whether they're my good friend or not, whether they're well-known around here or not.

You can verify this by checking out my @zepskiesreads side blog, which I started recently, or for an even longer archive, search "#zepskies reads" in my main blog. Why? Because whatever I read and enjoy, I reblog. Simple as that.

I also credit other writers (and readers) for giving me ideas and helping me work through a plot line behind the scenes. I support my friends whenever I can, however I am able.

3. Recently, I have been catching up in my TBR reading with some of my friends, since I haven't had as much time to read due to my full-time job and other demanding things happening in my life.

So who specifically do you think I'm not supporting? If there's a writer that you want to bring to my attention, you could've just said that respectfully.

However, if it's any business of yours what I choose to read and reblog, I'll be sure to let you know. 😉

[bonefall]

why is fernsong on thin ice with dovewing, did ivypool use him to send her messages or something like that

Yeaaaaahhh. I figured it was obvious enough to figure out lmao.

Dovewing really likes Fernsong (who doesn't?) but Ivypool continues to be a petty badger for years. She's changed a lot after the impostor murdered her daughter publicly for codebreaking and suddenly ShadowClan didn't look so crazy to resist him from the very start...

But she treated Dovewing like garbage for years. Always looking for ways to spite her and her 'Friendship' with Tigerheart, and it didn't even stop after she booked it. Dovewing doesn't WANT to fix this.

Sure, this stems from Lionblaze being a really bad parent, playing obvious favorites with Dovepaw and neglecting Ivypaw. But Ivypool would take it out on her. Well into their adulthood. And NOW she wants to reconcile? When Dovewing's finally away from her, and living happily?

Fernsong and Dovewing have a history, making friends with each other before Fern started dating Ivy when he first joined ThunderClan, but he FLOATED the idea of Dove talking to her sister, "you know... Ivypool talks about you," and she shut it down fast.

(That means she walked away, cutting the whole reunion short. She really did discover the power of Just Leaving and has been using it like a superpower)

He hasn't dared try again, since that moment. He knows very well he won't get a second chance, and Dovewing is his friend. He doesn't want to ruin it. She's forgiven him, but hasn't forgotten.

I think Dovewing has a reputation of being really sensitive, according to ThunderClan cats. And, she kinda is? But it's because she was so patient for years with them. She feels like if she gives an inch, they'll take a mile, and reacts accordingly.

...it's why the deafness isn't ALWAYS a bad thing, in Dovewing's mind. Sometimes she really appreciates it. She doesn't have to listen to her dad bark for her to get back here, or Bumblestripe break out into a sob, or whatever stage of denial Ivypool's circled back around to. If she does, it's quiet.

It's SO much easier to walk away now.

[angy-grrr]

I try to not be hater, but then I see the stupid takes and get madddddd

This is just what I feel every single time I see those shitty opinions

[emlos]

im going through a lot of new things emotionally for the first time in my life and i dont like it

[the-best-of-waynes]

ending co-written with mun of @brightest-starr-girl

"Pete is... he's really funny. And really sweet. And really smart." Lenny nudges Karen. "Kinda like you. But also... very much his own person. He's not exactly golden retriever. He's more of a chocolate lab puppy. And a little less stoic than you, a little quieter. But... I think I really like him, Kare. I just don't know that he'll like me back."

"Don't know that you're worth liking, you mean." Karen raises a brow at her best friend's pointed pout. "Don't try to deflect, I know you."

Lenny huffs, picking slightly at her fingernails. "Just... after our break-up. Can I even do a relationship? I feel like- like everyone I love, just ends up hurt. I'm a curse, K. Or it feels that way. Might as well protect them if I can't do anything else." She lets out a bitter half-laugh. "I already made you cry." A sideways glance. "Is it... selfish to bring you along?"

Karen sighs. "I'm gonna level with you, Len. The whole..." She can't bring herself to say 'faking your death', "-leaving thing is more selfish than staying. You don't want to see them hurt, so the solution is... hurt them from afar? So they're in an equally bad, if not worse position, you just don't have to deal with it?"

Lenny winces. "When you put it that way..."

"So why leave?"

"I already told you. I started planning it after the whole thing went down with Deathstroke and Joker and all that. And then- Dad and Mo- Selina broke up. Dad's trying to heal and me being around reminding him of her isn't helping at all. Then you've got her and the minute they break up she ditches, picks fu- picks Stray, her beloved Tim variant, over me, which I get; one of us is like her and the other is not-"

"As far as she knows," Karen interrupts.

"As far as she knows," Lenny confirms. "Then you've got Dick dealing with everything on his plate, same with Jay and Tim-Tam and Dami and Cass and Steph and Duke, and all of them need attention that I'm stealing with Dad who's already trying to balance everything for everyone. And, well... we disagree on the value-added of my presence."

"And there's nothing else?" Karen presses.

Lenny hesitates, then adds, "Nothing I can share at the moment."

Karen allows it, knowing she won't get anything else. "No matter what happens, you know I love you, right?"

"I... try." She meets Karen's eyes. "Kay. I... see your point in the selfishness. And maybe it is. Probably, it is. But... I have tried so hard, for so long, to be everything they needed me to be."

"Then tell them that," Karen begs, pleads, desperate. "Helena." She never uses her best friend's full first name. "Helena, I mean it. Just tell them."

Lenny swallows hard. "I can't," she whispers, a confession and a defense all at once. "I don't know how."

"Let them in. You've let me in. They want to be there for you."

"No. No, I- I've worked so hard. I've hidden so much just so I can get through. They don't know me, they don't get to know me, I can't do it. I've already lost so much- Kay- I- I can't lose again-"

She's begun to devolve into a panic attack, and Karen instantly moves, grabbing Lenny's hands and exaggerating her breathing for Lenny to match. "In for four. Hold for seven. Out for eight." She repeats the words as she models, until finally Lenny is calm. "You okay?"

Lenny- Lena- Helena- Len- whoever she is right now- nods before shaking her head no and half collapsing into Karen's embrace. Tears wet the blonde's shoulder, and both are incredibly grateful for waterproof makeup as Karen holds her, allowing her to let it out. "I don't know who I am anymore, K. I think I'm too broken for all of this.

"I think you need a break," Karen returns, gentle, soothing, rubbing her hand lightly along Lenny's back as she does just that. "You've been fighting for so long. Not just with a bow--I mean since I've met you. You've been fighting since before I met you, with all that stuff with Robe-"

"Don't say his name," Helena cuts in vehemently.

"Okay," Karen easily acquiesces. "Since the stuff with J.C. and your first foster dad. I saw you fight to stay afloat when living with your adoptive family. I saw you fight for those siblings. I saw you fight to find who you were, fight to get out, fight to get to Gotham. I've seen you fight for the other kids on the street, as a civilian and as a vigilante. I've seen you fight for the world. Seen you sacrifice yourself, over and over and over again. I've seen you fight for your parents and fight for your many new siblings. And I've seen you fight yourself every step of the way. I don't know of a time I haven't seen you fighting, if not an external force, then an internal battle with yourself. And I've known you for almost a decade, Len." Karen pulls back slightly, not letting go or removing her touch, but intentional. "Look me in the eye." She waits. "The only reason I'm not telling Mr. Wayne anything is because you need to rest. And if this is what it takes for you to do that, for you to stop fighting and just sit, then I'll do whatever you need me to. Because you need to. And if it takes getting away from the family and from who you've tried to force yourself to be, then I'll support you. But Len... don't let all this pain be in vain, okay? Just... promise me that."

"I promise." It's dull, but genuine, overloaded with emotions.

"Thank you." Karen pulls her back in for a hug. "I love you. Remember that, alright?"

"I love you too, Kare." For the first time all evening, for the first time in months, the smile Helena gives is easy and real. "I'll stay in touch."

Karen laughs, a wet laugh, one telling how hard it is to hold back the sobs. "You better. Or I'm hunting you down."

"Ooh, scary," Lenny teases.

Karen flicks her. "Just shut up and let me hug you. I don't know when I'll get to again."

"Ma'am, yes ma'am."

And so, Karen embraces her best friend tighter, the both soaking in the moment. When they let go and part ways, the gala winding down, it's lingering, bittersweet, but the words have been spoken; their hearts and minds are lighter, if a little sadder.

But their relationship, all the stronger.

Martha Wayne Foundation’s Midwinter Gala

open to anyone who wants to join!

Helena takes a deep breath and a shallow sip of champagne. Her family isn't here, so it's not like they can take it away, and no one else cares, because she's not getting drunk and pretty much everyone above the age of fourteen at a gala drinks.

As much as she hates these things, she is willing to suffer through if it means her dad and brothers get a little break. Maybe it'll help with the guilt a little. After all, it's the least she can do, considering...

Nevermind. She's nauseous once more.

She spots a server unobtrusively making his way through the crowd and immediately begins weaving through to reach him. The food is the only redeemable thing about a gala, other than the dancing; it might be small in size, but the number is unlimited, the selection varied, and the taste exquisite.

So focused is she on her goal of canapes that she completely misses the person she bumps into.

"So sorry," she apologizes quickly.

[outfit under the cut]

[talentforlying]

the mermaid: do you think ever really loved me? constantine: ah, now. listen, you can go back and forth about what's genuine, what's lies. none of it matters. you take it from me ... all love's magic. and all magic has a price.

behold: a guy who has been so starved of affection and approval and visible love his whole life that he takes whatever he can get when the opportunity presents itself to be loved, regardless of what it will cost him. who loves unapologetically and hard and without regret, regardless of whether it's good for him.

[seafoam-taide]

You know I thought for awhile that I was just a rare type of person who sure, liked people well enough but was okay being alone didn't necessarily need anyone and NO. NO. NO. OH MY GOD . YOU GIANT DUMBASS. NO HAHAHA NOOO NOPE

[lovedthestars-toofondly]

.

[bataranqs]

5 Happy Things

Jan 10, 2025

first day of this term's fellowship and it was really really nice

that people who aren't close to you can still love you and appreciate you and care for you!!! so so lovely

that human beings love stories and they can make us content or happy or sad

the act of writing as revelation or perhaps formation??? i have a friend who i call 'katydid' sometimes and i just reread a fic from 2021 where i wrote clint barton calling kate bishop 'katydid' and i think like. there's something here about how i wrote that nickname as a sign of his affection for her and these years later i use it as affection for my friend

when i sleep in on weekends and text my parents and they comment something casually that shows they noticed i texted hours later than i usually do. maybe love is sometimes just knowing someone's schedule bc you're such a constant part of it.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

speaking of, was remembering like i think i heard parts of defying gravity in the wild ever but i know popular & uhh. loathing from someone's showtunes playlist & then it's like oh yeah i know Of that one finale duet b/c i knew you i have been changed for good b/c they & a third party who were besties would be like okay if either of us die the other one will sing just one of those parts at their funeral & i'm like when you guys have hourlong conversations in here with me 7 ft away not included i sometimes have a contribution & say it during a long organic pause & nobody responds b/c you filtered me out....in parallel / affinity with being queer (& also not knowing that at the time, half a lifetime so far ago) where it's like okay i don't even want to get in on what you've got going on right now or be involved with that ever but it makes it quite Apparent i'm on a different & lower tier here

[girlwithrituals]

GLOW UP GUIDE FOR 2025⠀

READ: On average, it takes more than 2 months before a new behavior becomes automatic — 66 days to be exact. And considering that 2025 is precisely these many days away, why not start with our glow up plan already?

Physical Glow Up-

BODY

— 5-10K steps a day.

— 7-8 hours of sleep.

— workout everyday for 1 hr atleast- yoga/stretching/pilates/cardio/lifting weights. a workout may take one hour, but your mood will be boosted for the next 12 hours.

— posture training.

— sunlight exposure after waking up for at least 10 minutes.

NUTRITION

— 2-3 liters of water every day.

— limit your caffeine intake.

— avoid sugars as much as you can.

— high protein diet, pre and probiotics.

— more fruits and veggies (+ green smoothies if you like).

— no junk/processed food/trans fat.

— no eating after 8 pm.

SKINCARE

— be clear on your skin type (oily, dry, combination, sensitive).

— once you're clear, use these accordingly- cleanser, toner, targeted serum, eye cream, moisturizer, sunscreen (≥50 spf).

— keep your bedding clean as well.

— no picking of skin on your lips, cuticle etc.

— gua sha to help improve blood circulation and lessen toxins.

— cold therapy may take three to five minutes of being uncomfortable, but your energy levels will be boosted for the rest of the day.

— remove makeup before you go to bed.

BODY CARE

— shower every day.

— exfoliate 2x a week.

— use body lotion (shea butter/aloe vera gel/coconut oil).

HAIR CARE

— wash hair 2-3x a week

— oil your scalp 2x a week, at least 3 hours before shampoo.

— hair mask 1x per week.

— never brush wet hair.

— use silk pillow case.

HYGIENE

— brush your teeth 2x a day, clean tongue and the roof of the mouth daily.

— floss daily.

— cut your nails 1x a week, never remove the cuticles.

— glycolic acid under arm for odor and discoloration.

— never use soap on your coochie.

Mental Glow Up-

MINDSET

— set clear goals- define and breakdown your aspirations.

— start your mornings with positive affirmations.

— surround yourself with uplifting content and people.

— be shamelessly selfish to your career and mental health, remove anyone or anything that doesn't align with your priorities and wellbeing.

— boost your brain health by these 4 neuroscience tools:

difficult first: start your day with the most difficult task (cortisol and dopamine are high in the body meaning that your body/mind is primed to work).

rest your eyes: introduce a micro-pause after learning by resting/closing your eyes - will help retain information better.

tomorrow's worries: write tomorrow's to-do list before bed as it is proven to be effective in helping you fall asleep.

find time to play: engage in low-stake play. can be anything you find fun but where the outcome doesn't matter (induces neuroplasticity + reduces stress).

MIND

— meditation might take as low as ten minutes, but your focus will be improved for the rest of the day.

— no social media after waking up and at least an hour before bed.

— keep aside 1 hr of time to read daily! reading a new book may take five hours, but you will keep the knowledge forever.

— journaling, gratitude.

— digital detox once a week or for 12 hours.

— limit unnecessary screentime, unfollow or cut off people you don't want to see.

JOURNALING

— choose a regular time each day to journal, making it a part of your routine.

— find a quiet, comfortable place free from distractions. light a candle if you want.

— allow your thoughts to flow without censoring or editing.

— write about your feelings and emotions to understand them better. write about things you are thankful for to boost your mood. write about your short-term and long-term goals. identify what triggers certain emotions or reactions

— set a timer for 5-10 minutes and write continuously during that time.

— reflect on both positive experiences and challenges.

— make lists, journal your thoughts on these questions.

— journal at night to clear your mind before bedtime, because emotions and thoughts lose their power once we acknowledge them.

— a gratitude practice may take five minutes, but your mindset will be shifted for the rest of the day.

AFFIRMATIONS

— customise affirmations to your needs.

Personal Life-

WEEKLY TASKS

— initiate small changes: begin with small, manageable tasks such as making your bed or cleaning your room every sunday.

— celebrate your success: reward yourself when you achieve your goals or have a consistently productive week. consider treats like buying flowers for yourself or watching your favorite show.

DAILY WORK

— set achievable goals: establish realistic goals for the day, week, or month ahead.

— track your progress.

— organise your work space, declutter your shelves etc.

— embrace the power of lists: keep a list of tasks to be done and their deadlines. this way, you start each day with a clear plan. to make it visually appealing and motivating, consider using productivity apps like evernote, habit tracker, or notion.

PRODUCTIVITY TIPS

— wake up early.

— plan ahead everything, do scheduling. you can use:

google calendar / notion / tasks .

— if the task takes less than 2 minutes to finish, do it immediately.

— countdown rule, if you are procrastinating, count 1-2-3-4-5 and jump.

— start slow, don't rush and try to do everything at one time.

— follow a proper routine, use app locks based on screentime.

— pomodoro technique, 25 min work, and 5 min break.

— schedule longer break times as well e.g 30 min nap.

[snekdood]

i just struggle to believe theres any ethical way to harvest meat. farm animal dying of old age? yeah. ok. sure. but farm animals aren't going to be perpetually dying of old age enough to fulfill the demand for their meats. you can make better and more convincing arguments to me for ethically harvesting eggs, wool and milk rather than meat.

[bi-writes]

just his girl being so attracted to simon and him not understanding it. (18+)

i mean like...he's never had a girlfriend like this. he's never even had a girlfriend, period, not really, not anyone he's seen more than once, not one that he's known long enough to remember her name.

he just doesn't get it. whenever he comes into your vicinity, he can see the sparkle in your eyes. the smile that graces your face, the way your expression lights up, the way your body moves on its own just to get closer to him.

he wonders if he lets you because of the sick satisfaction he feels. to be the center of your attention, it makes him feel so fucking special, so important. another man can look at you the same way, but he knows your cunt will be dry. but when he looks at you that way, he can see the way your legs squeeze together, and he loves knowing that if he flipped up the hem of your skirt, you'd be so sticky and practically drooling there, all for him.

he doesn't think himself very attractive. he's had his fair share of one night stands, but the way you keen for him makes him so hungry. he loves hearing you whine when he grabs your ass, loves feeling you drip onto his fingers when he kisses you after a long day, loves the way that nothing else will ever make you smile the way he can when he touches your face.

"i love you so much," you whisper, and he has to look away or else he'll groan.

"i missed you," you whimper after he's been away for a long time, and he has to bite back the tremble in his lip because fuck, he missed you, too.

"you're so big, baby," you whine, and he can't help the way he chubs up immediately as you feel up his thick biceps, along his pecs, over the warm layer of fat around his solid middle. you can cum so fast just riding his big thigh, hell--you can cum by yourself just looking at him. he's so hot to you, so handsome, even if he doesn't take his mask off or any of his clothes, because you love him so much, and his eyes are sometimes all you need to feel enough. and fuck if that isn't the biggest ego boost, seeing his girl's pussy creaming just by fixating on the flex of his big hand.

his confidence is so puffed whenever he's around you. he gets goosebumps whenever your eyes are on him. even now, it's been years with you, and you still make him feel like the hottest guy in the room with the way your eyes look him up and down.

you're his perfect girl. his best prize. he doesn't understand how he ever got you, how he ever reeled you in, but there isn't a day that goes by that he doesn't understand how undeserving he is of you and how incredibly lucky he is. it makes him selfish. he has you, and he can't lose you, so fuck how he has to keep you, cause he will. and he thinks you like that, too.

he thinks you like the way he fondles you under your skirt in a crowded place. he thinks you like the way he fucks, deep thrusts as he grips your face and murmurs mine, mine, mine between low groans and fingerprint bruises. he thinks you like the way he hovers, glaring at anyone that looks your way and devouring you in a grocery store parking lot because the cashier at the till looked at your legs for just a second too long, and need ta remind ya who ya belong to, pet.

you were wet anyways, he had worn short sleeves that day, and your eyes hadn't left his tattoo sleeve since he came out of the shower. so wet, ruining those panties, his favorite little black pair with the skull print pattern along the band.

dripping, creamy, pulsing little cunt that is all his. hadn't so much as even touched you yet, and here you are, drooling so sweet. he just didn't want to waste the meal.