#IT'S LIKE KNOWING GOD BUT IF HE WAS SUPER NICE
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cressidagrey · 2 days ago
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Such A Mystery - Part 11
Pairing: Max Verstappen x Colette Leclerc (Original Character)
Summary:
Max Verstappen fell in love at the ripe old age of 12 and never looked back.
Colette Leclerc really regrets posting that particular Taylor Swift Lyric to her private Instagram account, because it made George Russell go insane.  
The rest of the world has absolutely no idea that the Dutch Lion and Charles Leclerc’s twin sister have been a couple for 15 years and are expecting a baby. 
Warnings: 
Pregnancy, Mention of multiple miscarriages, Pregnancy complications, George Russell Bashing (he's probably really nice in real life but in this, he's the bad guy, sorry), Jos Verstappen, We have apparently now reached the time where I also bash Ferrari. I am sure they are super nice in real life too. They are not in this.
Author Notes: Huge thanks to @llirawolf for holding my hand through this. Chapter 11 of 12!
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Chapter 11
His sister's screams were bloodcurdling.
Charles had known that birth was a painful, messy affair, that it was never easy, but actually hearing his sister’s very real, very painful screams from the room beyond was a truly eye-opening experience. He didn’t know how women could survive this, frankly.
Arthur looked green around the gills, not helped by the white bandage on his forehead…which apparently had been the result of him fainting and being taken down by the corner of a hospital bed. 
"I am never having kids," Arthur said, swallowing heavily.
"I am rethinking my family planning as well," Lorenzo said weakly. "I don't think I can stand seeing Charlotte go through that pain."
Arthur grimaced as another scream came ringing out from the room. “I think I am scheduling a vasectomy tomorrow,” he said faintly. “This absolutely confirms it as a good life decision for me.”
"I think that's the concussion talking," Charles tried to assure his brother, as another scream rang out.
On second thought…maybe Arthur was onto something.
And just at that moment, Colette's scream suddenly broke off. They froze—all of them.
Absolute silence rang through the room. Charles was afraid to even breathe. He had no idea what was happening on the other side of the door, and that terrified him. Everything had been going well so far, hadn't it?
And then a cry rang out.
A baby’s cry: shrill, a little indignant.
All three men let out their collective breaths in a sigh of pure relief.
The whole room was silent for a moment, as they processed the fact that their sister and her baby were alright.
“Oh, thank god,” Lorenzo said feebly. “I thought something awful had happened.”
“No kidding,” Arthur agreed. He sagged back against the wall behind him, his skin regaining a proper colour again, instead of the sickly green it had been moments before.
Charles leaned his head back against the wall, shutting his eyes for a brief second. It was over. Everything had gone alright. 
Colette and her baby were both going to be okay.
"We are uncles now," Arthur said suddenly.
A beat of surprise. And then:
“Oh god, we are, aren’t we?” Lorenzo said.
“We’re uncles,” Arthur repeated a slightly shell-shocked look on his face.
Charles couldn’t help it. A smile broke out over his face, a very real, utterly ridiculous one that he didn’t have the energy to hold back. “We are, aren’t we?” he repeated Enzo’s words.
“This is absolutely insane!” Arthur said, a grin creeping over his face. “We’re going to be the coolest uncles ever.”
“I thought kids are overrated?” Lorenzo pointed out wryly.
“The most overrated,” Arthur insisted. “But I’m going to spoil our niece or nephew absolutely rotten.”
It took a little while longer, but finally, the door opened, revealing Max. He looked…exhausted. Absolutely beat. There were dark circles under his eyes…but a look of relief was on his face like Charles had never seen on his friend before. And yet, Max was grinning.
Looking happier than ever.
“Max,” Charles said, a little hoarsely. He wanted to ask how they were, he wanted to ask about the baby, he wanted to ask if Coco was alright. But all he could get out was Max’s name, his voice too thick.
"Come meet your niece," Max said simply.
He said the word ‘niece’ like it was the best thing in the world, and it made Charles smile. He straightened up, following Max into the room, Arthur and Lorenzo trailing behind him.
Coco was curled up in her bed, her hair messy, her face pale, but she was smiling, a weak little smile tinged with exhaustion but so very, very happy. And cradled against her chest was the baby, wrapped snugly in a little pink blanket.
Charles just sort of stopped dead in the midst of the room. Seeing his sister with her baby in her arms… it was like his brain had stopped functioning in the space of a moment.
All three brothers were silent for a long moment, just taking in the sight of them.
Charles felt a lump rise in his throat,and swallowed heavily.
Lorenzo was biting his lip, trying to keep the tears from welling up in his eyes. And Arthur was absolutely silent, all of the usual sass gone from his expression.
It was a moment that seemed to stretch on forever, as they all just stood awkwardly at the edge of the bed, just looking.
Finally, Coco looked up at them, and her smile widened faintly. “Well?” she asked. "Cha, don’t you want to hold your niece?"
His heart skipped, and he managed to pull himself forward so he could sit down on the bed next to her. “I get to hold her?” he asked, just to be certain.
"Of course, you do," Coco told him softly. "Here you go."
Charles could hardly believe it as Colette gently eased the baby into his arms, carefully supporting her head. And suddenly he was holding her, his niece, this brand new little life, in all of her tiny, delicate, vulnerable little glory, bundled up in a soft pink blanket.
"She's perfect," he said softly, swallowing. 
She was so…fragile, in his hands. He hadn’t expected her to be that small, somehow. Charles smiled faintly, running his fingers gently over her hair. Her eyes were closed, and one tiny fist was poking out of the blanket.  
"Does she have a name yet?" he asked his sister. 
"I get to pick," Colette told him with a grin. "Given that Max named the cats after Monaco's nightlife."
Charles had to admit that was a fair point.
“What, you aren’t going to let Max name your daughter La Rascasse?” he teased Coco who just rolled her eyes.  "What have you come up with?" he asked curiously, tearing his eyes away from his niece to look at his sister.
"If she was a boy, I would have named him Emilian Hervé after Papa," Colette said softly. "Sadly that doesn't work for a girl."
Charles smiled faintly at the mention of their father. Their father would have doted on this baby, he was certain. He would have spoiled her absolutely rotten.
"So I figured… somebody else needed to give their name for her," Coco continued. "I hope you don't mind."
"Of course, I don't mind," Charles assured her at once. Why should he? "Whose name did you use?" he wondered. 
"Yours, you idiot, Cha," Coco told him, her voice soft. "Charlene Victoria Verstappen. We'll call her Charlie for short."
"Oh my god," Max's sister breathed somewhere behind him. "You.."
But Charles could only stare at his sister…could only feel the lump rise in his throat again. He swallowed hard. “You named her after me?” he asked with a waver in his voice, feeling like his heart might just explode in his chest.
"Of course, I did," Colette said softly. "You're my twin brother, why wouldn't I name my baby girl after you?"
Charles couldn't find any words to answer that with. He couldn't find any words at all. His eyes stung, and he couldn't look at her for fear he might cry. He looked down at the baby. His…god, his niece that was named after him.  
He gently ran his fingers over her hair again, marvelling at her tiny, perfect little body. "Hello, Charlie," he said softly, his voice a little choked.
The baby didn't even stir, and Charles smiled, shifting slightly to support her more securely. He couldn't believe that his sister had done this, that she had named her baby girl after him. It made his heart feel like it was fit to burst straight out of his chest, made him try to blink back tears and fail horribly. 
"Congratulations, you've made Charles cry," Lorenzo said from somewhere behind him, sounding a little choked himself.
Charles let out a noise that was half-laughing, half-crying as his brothers joined him at his side. "Shut up," he said, his voice rough with emotion.
"Not a chance," Arthur said as he squeezed in next to him to get a better look at the baby. Lorenzo joined him, peering down at the baby in Charles' arms with a strangely soft expression on his face.
"You gave her my name too," Victoria said weakly. Charles looked up at Max’s sister, not knowing what to say. It had sounded so obvious, so natural to hear Colette say it, that Charles had completely forgotten that Victoria shared the same name.
But she did. 
"A sibling for each of us," Colette said simply. "Sorry, Enzo, Arthur. Maybe next time.”
“Nah, Arthurelle is a horrible name,” Arthur responded. “Totally see why you went for Charlene.” 
Colette laughed, but it was a very weak, exhausted laugh. Charles couldn’t blame her. She must be absolutely wrung out.
And still as he looked at her...as her eyes met his, he could feel how happy his sister. How utterly in love she was with her daughter. How this was everything Colette had ever wanted, and it was right there. 
"I am never driving you to the hospital again though, just so you know," Arthur said. “That cost me at least 30 years of my life.”
"But you did so well," Colette teased their younger brother. "Thank you for that, ma petite puce."
Arthur grimaced faintly, but he looked too tired and happy to actually bite back. Charles smiled faintly at all of them in turn.
Charles‘ eyes snagged on their mother.
"Well, Grand-Mère," he teased her. "How does it feel?"
For a long moment, their mother simply looked at the baby in Charles’ arms with an unreadable expression on her face. And then her expression slowly shifted into a smile. A true smile. A happy, proud Grandma smile.
“Your father would be so proud of you all.” 
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blackgirlsloveburrow · 24 hours ago
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NSFW 18+
joe burrow x uc student!reader has been on my mind so this is for my college babes
growing up in ohio, you never really would expect to be in a situation like this.
ohio has a few perks to it, but overall is mostly corn, dingy neighborhoods, and like three big cities.
so how did the top nfl quarterback end up in your bed?
it was kind of hard to look back on as your hangover hurt the harder you tried to think. at least he looked peaceful sleeping next to your hello kitty squishmallow.
shit.
"oh god this is so embarassing," you think out loud. all you remember is going to a dinky bar with your friends after lowkey bombing a history test and then...
oh. now you remember.
the kelces were in town last night. they were of course university of cincinnati alums, and joe burrow was along for their reunion tour. they did a whole interview in fifth third arena, that you got to miss of course because you were crying in your pillow over american history. afterwards they decided to visit the small college bar for the nostalgia, and that's where you saw him and he saw you.
joe was so hot.
everyone was freaking out, you as well on the inside, but you decided to order another vodka cran instead of gathering around them like the rest of the bar was. it was your third drink of the night, so you were definitely feeling it to say the least.
after a while the hype started to die down, and you felt a towering body right next to yours. you looked over and see:
him.
"hey. i'm joe," he said with an awkward smile on his face, sticking out his hand.
you don't feel super nervous, as you had enough liquid courage in your system to form a sentence.
"hi i'm y/n and i definitely know who you are," you laughed and reciprocated his handshake. your friends were behind you freaking out. you cringed a bit.
"i see you're with your friends, but i was wondering if you'd want to come with me to a more private bar? i have a driver out back and i can meet you out there so we don't cause a scene or anything" he said.
okay you definitely drank too much because now you must be hearing things.
"sure! i mean yes haha," you replied, trying to control your excitement.
"cool i'll see you out there y/n".
he walked away. your friends came from behind you, pestering you for the details of you and joe's interaction.
"he just asked how i was doing guys that's all. i do think i am going to head out though. i have to wake up early tomorrow," you told them. it was a pretty solid lie as they just pouted and said their goodbyes.
you made your way through the crowd towards the back door of the bar. someone, probably security, was at the back door and asked for your name. you gave it to them and you walked outside. there were two sleek black cars. one for joe, and one for the kelces. the kelces were still inside, reveling in their hometown glory, so you guessed it would be just you and joe.
the driver opened the door for you and you slid inside. your beat up honda had nothing on this vehicle. you and joe both said hey and he offered you a drink. and who are you to say no to a free drink?
you took it and the driver started going towards your destination. joe asked you questions about yourself and what brought you to the bar that night. you give him details and also embarrassingly told him you flunked a history test.
he laughed, talking about his college experiences and himself as well.
you finished your drink as you both arrived at the bar.
it was really nice. definitely a bar they don't let just anyone go into. luckily you were wearing a slightly cute dress.
joe took your hand as you exited the car. your face got hot at the gesture (or maybe it was the alcohol) and he walked you inside.
he led you to the bar where you guys both ordered some drinks and he started a tab. you guys talked for a while, getting closer and closer with each drink.
"you know i think football is kinda boring," you said without thinking, the alcohol taking over your conversation skills.
"you just have to get to know it better, like how i'm getting to know you better," he replied speaking closely to you.
"you should come to one of my games sometimes," he added.
"i would love to! but only if i can get a ja'marr chase jersey," you joked to him.
"totally not funny, you'd look way better with my name and number on your back," he responded defensively.
before you could respond you heard one of your favorite songs to dance too.
"oh my god! i love this song. come dance with me," you said as you pulled him to the dance floor.
you started swaying your hips to the rhythm of the song with him behind you. he matched your rhythm, putting his hands on your hips, pulling you closer to his hard on. you felt it on your lower back, surprised, and starting to get turned on.
the song finished and you turn around. he grabbed your neck and kissed you. you grabbed the back of his hair and stuck your tongue in his mouth. he kissed you like you were giving him oxygen to breathe.
this led you two out of the club towards the black vehicle, not being able to keep your hands off of each other. you requested to go to your apartment by your college since it's close. and joe just wanting to be inside of you didn't care to object.
you and joe continue to make out in the car. you are rubbing his hard on while he is making hickeys on your neck and grabbing your boobs.
you guys finally got to your apartment, thanked the driver (and probably traumatized him as well), and made your way inside.
you and him rushed to the bedroom, where you and joe immediately started to strip.
joe laid you on the bed where he started to eat you out.
"oh f-fuck joe," you moaned. he sucked your clit, gripping your thighs so that you wouldn't get away from him.
you grabbed his hair, pushing him more into you, which made him grunt in response. he continued pleasuring you for a while.
"i-i'm gonna cum," you whined. this made him get up, kiss you, and flip you over.
"fuck baby you are so wet for me. i wanted to cum just from eating you out," he replied, breathing heavily.
he pulled your ass up into the air, his cock lining up with your hole.
"i want you to cum with me baby," he moans, sticking his girth slowly in your cunt.
oh my god he was so big.
it felt like he was splitting you open in the best way possible. he immediately was hitting your g-spot, having you moan so loud your whole building could probably hear.
he was moaning too, and was gripping your ass so hard as he pulled you into him with deep, hard strokes.
"fuck your little pussy is so perfect baby, he moaned loudly.
you were clawing at your bed sheets, loving how vocal he was too.
"oh daddy i'm gonna cum, oh my god!" you scream. he pulled out, flipping you over again, and reentered you.
"i wanna see your face when you cum for me," he huffs. he's holding your thighs up, fucking you deeper and harder than before. your eyes rolled into the back of your head as you released. he soon followed releasing deep inside of you.
he kissed you. you reciprocated but were quick to fall into a deep sleep, and so was he.
it was an eventful night.
so now that you remember...
you put on an oversized tee and went into the kitchen to make some breakfast. you are pretty much in your own world, thinking about last nights events, until you hear joe walking down the hallway. he has his clothes on. he looks at you sheepishly.
"hey, so i really had a good time last night," he said to you.
"so did i," you replied smiling.
"i hate to do this but i kinda have to go. my manager called and i'm kind of late to a meeting," he says a little embarrassed.
you're face looks disappointed.
"but-," he adds. "here's my number. please call me. i really want to see you again and have you in my jersey in the stands like i talked about last night".
"i would love that," you reply, mood brightening already.
he moves into kiss you passionately, and then leaves.
how are you just supposed to go back to school monday now?
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scariusaquarius · 2 days ago
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rehab. 3.
Avenger! Bucky Barnes x Winter Soldier! Fem! Reader
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Summary: While on a mission to find any more possible super soldiers that were a part of the Winter Soldier program, Steve and Bucky make a discovery in an abandoned HYDRA base that was cleared out a few years prior to their mission. They discover the Reader, a long-forgotten soldier that was still asleep within a functioning cryostasis pod; still awaiting orders. While Bucky isn't happy about it, he is put up to the challenge of helping to rehabilitate the soldier in Wakanda where she may be able to become a person again.
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A/n: I had someone on Ao3 ask me about how often this will get updated and my answer is that I don't know. My IRL can be pretty unpredictable and I do deal with depression on a daily basis. I'm going to do my best to update this while still working on my Leon Kennedy fic, Unlikely Salvation! Please do bear with me as I try to figure out where I want this story to go!
This is an au where Bucky joined the avengers but still rehabilitated in Wakanda (sometime before Infinity War [canon divergent cause NOPE]). I am NOT fluent in Russian, so I did use google translate cause I couldn't find a good translator that I trusted. If anything is wrong, PLEASE let me know!! Also, I tried to list as many warnings as possible so you know what the story will contain as chapters are posted. Stay safe!
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Genre: Slowburn, Enemies to Lovers/Friends to Lovers, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Humor, Drama, Dark Content Rated: Explicit Warning: Angst, Dark Content: Graphic Depictions of Sexual Assault, Blood and Gore, Mentions of Manipulation, Kidnapping, Canon-Typical Violence, Body Horror, Nonconsensual Body Modification/Scarring, Emotional and Physical Abuse, Mentions of Murder, Mentions of Suicidal Thoughts/Ideation, Graphic Depictions of Human Remains, Mentions of Sexual Coercion/Manipulation, Death, Misuse of Drugs/Forced Drugging, Self-Harm (Graphic Depictions and Mentions), Nightmares
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Author: ScariusAquarius
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rehab masterlist. chapter 1 / chapter 2
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The lab was hustling with scientists, the Wakandan sunrise filtering through the enormous windows with an intensity that made Bucky eyes hurt as he stood by the cryostasis pod where the Winter Soldier would soon be housed.
The whole trek to the lab had been uneventful: not once did the soldier fight back. It seemed that the failure to complete her mysterious mission had caused her to shut down, and Bucky was tense as she was strapped down with multiple magnetic cuffs like the ones he and Steve used back in the quinjet.
Even with the super soldier serum coursing through her veins and whatever other enhancements she might naturally have or that HYDRA might have given her would prove useless. She was strapped down nice and tight.
There was a machine hovering over her knee, the tissue and bone beneath crunching and grinding as it was fusing back together, her expression unchanging despite her kneecap and patella being exposed. The air was beginning to smell of singed flesh and hair, and Bucky felt slightly nauseous.
Bucky hated knowing how much damage his arm could inflict; how unforgiving his grip was and how hard it was to regulate the strength at times so he would break yet another glass just by holding it and trying to take a drink.
And it had been so easy to crush her flesh like it was nothing.
"Howard? Howard, oh god...oh god, Anthony...!"
Bucky clenched his jaw, swallowing harshly as Maria Stark's voice whispered to him, and he was broken out of his trance by Shuri announcing.
"Once we are finished with her knee, I would like to begin deconstructing her mind. If efforts are fruitless, I would like for you to activate her again if possible. We might be able to figure out what her previous orders were and her intentions, history, anything that would prove useful to the eradication of HYDRA."
Steve frowned, asking as T'Challa simply stayed quiet, observing the Winter Soldier as she sat complacent and quiet; seemingly not hearing a word that they were saying.
"Are you sure that's a good idea? What if it doesn't work?"
Shuri replied confidently, flicking her eyes over to Steve before gesturing towards Bucky with a nod of her head.
"We will have to reset completely and start over. Sergeant Barnes' rehabilitation was easy due to the flaws within his programming that HYDRA was unable to remedy. However, we do not know what improvements have been made to HYDRA's algorithm since then. It will be challenging to separate the core person that this woman was before her programming, but not impossible."
T'Challa then asked, raising an eyebrow at Shuri as she shined a light into the Winter Soldier's eyes, taking down notes and recording her vitals.
"What if you are unable to separate the identity from the programming?"
Shuri sighed deeply, shrugging.
"She will have to be built from the ground up. This woman will be like a completely clean slate down to a new name if we are unable to figure out who she was before. I am already running the best biometric identification programs within our arsenal to figure out who she could have been. I would assume that Stark is also doing so?"
Steve nodded, replying as he watched the soldier closely as her eyes inconspicuously flicked to a scientist that readying a syringe.
"Yes, he's also got Nat looking through the database that we downloaded and coursing through any previous databanks we obtained from previous HYDRA raids."
Shuri then turned to Bucky, making him quirk an eyebrow up slightly as she regarded him with a raised brow.
"What is your take on this, Sergeant Barnes?"
All eyes were on him, and Bucky sighed slightly he stared down the soldier, watching the way her brow began to tense slightly the closer the scientist got. The second the syringe touched her skin, the soldier began to freak out.
Due to the cuffs restricting her movement, she resorted to smacking her back against the chair over and over, hissing and yelling loudly as the scientist jolted and stumbled back. T'Challa immediately shoved her down, Shuri exclaiming profanities as she snatched the syringe from the scientist and shoved it into the soldier's neck.
The soldier hissed and yanked her neck away, breaking the needle, and Shuri groaned, gesturing with her hands wildly.
"Really? Now I'm going to have to dig that out. You make things harder for yourself!"
Okoye quipped, her spear pointing towards the soldier as Steve and Bucky stood tensed and ready should the Soldier somehow get out of her binds.
"How primitive! She is like a wild animal!"
The sedative began to kick in, the woman's bucking gradually stopping, and she went limp within the chair, head rolling to the side as her eyes rolled into the back of her skull. Bucky's heart was racing slightly with adrenaline, and Steve observed.
"Seems like she knew what the syringe meant."
T'Challa frowned deeply, leaning back and brushing his hands off slightly as he glanced back at Steve.
"An important but grave detail: she must be remembering...or perhaps, it is a recent memory."
Shuri plucked the broken needle from the soldier's neck, humming.
"I will take it as a good sign that there is at least someone beneath the rubble. I promise you, Mr. Rogers, that I will do my best to find her."
Steve nodded before clapping Bucky on the shoulder.
"You going to be alright?"
Bucky glanced over at Steve, muttering truthfully.
"I don't want to do this, but I'm only doing it for you. I'm worried that she is going to somehow lead HYDRA to me and it's gonna be a shit-show all over again."
Steve was firm, declaring quietly.
"You know I wouldn't let that happen. I'd have to miss that big head of yours again."
"You're a goddamn punk, you know that?"
Bucky couldn't keep the smile from gracing the corners of his lips, and Steve smiled at him softly before hugging him firmly and backing away.
"Alright, I'm going to leave you to it. I'll check in periodically; let you all know what we find on our side of the world."
T'Challa hummed, walking towards Steve.
"I will accompany you. I would like to discuss some things before your departure."
Steve nodded, and the two men walked out of Shuri's lab. Bucky turned back around, making a slight face as Shuri cut away pieces of the woman's clothing, revealing a black and tight-fitting compression camisole.
There were numerous scars and marks all over her body, some jagged and unforgiving while others were clean and precise. Shuri hummed softly, muttering as her fingers grazed a jagged scar that ran beneath the woman's neck.
"The things this woman must have been through...HYDRA is truly despicable."
Bucky couldn't speak. Hell, he couldn't even think outside of the boiling hatred and rage that was beginning to consume him at the sight of the gruesome scars that covered her upper body. Bucky could only assume that it got worse beneath her uncut clothing, and he had to bite his tongue as hard as he could.
Whip scars, burn marks, mutilated flesh that never regenerated, her body was a canvas; a horrendous painting that HYDRA had taken delight in decorating. This was more than just punishment, it was a warning.
A warning that disobedience will not be tolerated.
How many times did they slash her throat for the scar to become so prominent? How many times did they burn her skin to the point that the serum couldn't work to regenerate? How often did they beat and prod and jab and shoot and stab at her until she was too weak to fight back?
In a morbid way, Bucky took it as a sign that despite her being activated and still dangerous, her history of resistance let HYDRA know that the person that used to be there still existed.
There was someone still underneath the rubble, as Shuri had put it, and Bucky hoped that Shuri could pull her out.
But even so, would it help? Would it be right to let this woman have to live with the memories and nightmares of what had happened to her? Was it right to subject her mind to the torture of HYDRA even after being rescued?
Was it right to try despite knowing how traumatized and desolated the woman was going to be once she was free? Hell, there were times were Bucky could still smell the scent of the cologne his Handler wore when punishing Bucky, and now Bucky couldn't stand to smell the scent without being pushed into a panic.
"Don't worry, White Wolf. I am going to do what I can to help this woman."
"That's not what I'm worried about."
His voice was choked, cracking slightly as he rushed to respond, and Shuri tilted her head at him, asking Bucky with a curious gaze.
"Then what is it that plagues you?"
"I just...is it right to do this when she's gonna have to live with the memories and the nightmares?"
Bucky felt ashamed by the frown that crossed Shuri's face, but was slightly relieved to know that the disappointment that flashed within her eyes was not directed at him.
"I understand the concern, and I understand that it will not be easy for her...but that is why you are here. You have survived HYDRA and are free of the programming they worked hard to instill within your mind. With living proof that persistence yields peace, I truly think that she may become a person again...it will just take time and a lot of work."
Bucky nodded, and Shuri was quiet for a moment before she murmured.
"While it may not seem fair to save her...it is truly a tragedy to deny her the chance that HYDRA never gave her."
The words left a profoundly bitter taste within Bucky's mouth, and he could distinctly taste copper from him biting into his cheek too hard. Shaking his head, Bucky looked away from the woman as Shuri began to assess her further.
"Reactivating her will come with a risk. I would only be able to activate her, but I don't have the knowledge to deactivate, if that's even possible. When I was activated...the longer I was out of cryostasis and hadn't been wiped, the easier it was to resist the programming. I don't know if it will be the same for her."
"As I said: reactivation will allow us the ability to communicate with her. She has not been wiped, it would seem, so it is possible that this woman knows something."
Shuri grabbed a butterfly needle and a vial, putting on gloves and tying a tourniquet around the woman's arm so that she could find a vein. Once she found it, Shuri inserted the butterfly needle, taping it to the soldier's skin.
"I am now going to collect bloodwork to run DNA diagnostics and input the data into the biometric identification program to see if we may be able to identify her this way. I'm also going to do some testing to see what serum she might have been injected with to trace it back to the creator."
Bucky nodded and sat back, watching and listening intently as Shuri described what she was doing and what the programs did on a deeper, intellectual manner. While Bucky was listening and trying to absorb the information, he couldn't stop glancing over at the scars that lined the woman's body.
Horrific couldn't even describe it. It made him sick to his stomach. If Shuri noticed that Bucky was slightly distracted, she gracefully didn't comment on it. Instead, Shuri tried to distract him the best that she could while the machine she was operating was taking a scan of the woman's brain.
After a moment, Shuri hummed, a perplexed look on her face as she sauntered around the hologram of the woman's brain, tendrils of red seeming to pulse all over the organ, and Shuri's brows furrowed as she thought to herself. Bucky asked with an intrigued look on his face.
"What is that?"
"This is a digital recreation of the woman's brain as well as the areas most affected by HYDRA's programming."
Shuri looked proud as she began to move the hologram around, zooming in and out of different areas and lobes before breaking it down into layers.
"Thanks to the work that I did for you, I was able to develop an AI that was capable of identifying HYDRA's programming, as well as detect the intensity and depth that it runs. It gives possible solutions and suggestions on what to work on first...and tells me when something activates the program."
Shuri's voice seemed to lower slightly, side-eyeing him for a moment before she looked back at the hologram, but Bucky didn't notice. Bucky was floored, in awe at the ingenuity of the AI that he couldn't help but to whistle lowly.
"That's incredible, Shuri."
"Please, compared to her, you were like a walk in the park."
Shuri waved him off before she hummed, pointing to a area that was largely red within the hologram.
"However, unlike your programming, her programming is much more complex. There are multiple layers where the programming intertwines with core pieces and memories, which will make unraveling the ties difficult. There might be parts of her that will not be salvageable."
Bucky pursed his lips slightly, shaking his head as he replied gently.
"Like you said: from the ground and up if needed."
Shuri smiled widely at Bucky, her eyes crinkling as she teased gently, pointing at him.
"See, now you are beginning to understand."
Bucky rolled his eyes before he asked as Shuri began to work, a screen popping up and flashing slightly.
"So, what is that?"
"If we are going to salvage as much as we can of the core person she was before she became a Winter Soldier, we will have to analyze every piece of her psyche. Unfortunately, I cannot do much with HYDRA's program basically firewalling me. It is like they added some sort of encryption to her so that any attempt of undoing their work would be unsuccessful or too risky."
Bucky tilted his head, becoming slightly confused as he pointed to the red parts of the woman's brain.
"Is that why those areas are red like that?"
"Yes. If you look closely, it is almost as though these red areas are wrapping around the parts that are otherwise untouched by HYDRA's program. If we can get past the encryptions, we might be able to get through."
Bucky nodded along, crossing his arms before he glanced down at the woman, asking apprehensively.
"Are you going to make me activate her?"
"For now, no. I do not think that it will be necessary. All I need to do is bypass the encryptions, break them down, and then I will begin to root out the memories with the most significance to her."
Shuri spared Bucky a glance, relaying to him honestly.
"If possible, I would like to keep you from doing so because of the mental repercussions activating her will have. I will entrust the process to Okoye if activation is the only option we have left."
Bucky shook his head, murmuring to Shuri as he glanced down at the woman again as her face scrunched slightly.
"No, I'll do it...let's just hope that I don't have to."
Shuri became quiet, staring Bucky down for a moment before she turned away and suggested.
"Perhaps you should see the Captain off. Breaking through the encryption will take time, and I can tell that you are starting to become brain-dead listening to me."
Bucky chuckled before bowing his head slightly, shaking his head.
"I'd rather not upset your brother by leaving you with her by yourself."
Shuri made a face at him, the expression reminding him of Steve pre-serum.
"Do you think I am not capable of defending myself? This is my territory, white boy."
Bucky raised his hands in surrender, wincing slightly.
"I'm sorry, your highness, but I've been on the receiving end of your brother's foot."
Shuri barked out a laugh, and Okoye made her presence known by snorting while a couple of the Dora Milaje stood by the entrance to Shuri's lab.
"At least he knows what he would be up against. Do not worry, Sergeant Barnes, I will stand watch. The Captain is about to make his departure."
Bucky nodded before expressing his gratitude, nodding gently to Shuri.
"Thank you. I'll be back shortly."
Bucky turned and left quickly, his steps quick and urgent as he arrived outside. However, the quinjet was already flying away, making Bucky purse his lips. T'Challa's voice greeted him, making the man look over at the King as he spoke.
"You just missed him."
"He's always running off on me somehow, so I'm not entirely surprised."
T'Challa chuckled slightly, before he glanced over at Bucky.
"How are you feeling about all of this?"
Bucky glanced over at T'Challa, regarding him with an exhausted look before he turned back front, watching Steve leave again.
"I'm worried, honestly. There's so many things that could go wrong. What if HYDRA is trying to find me and was using her to do it? HYDRA must know that the Avengers have been raiding the old facilities that aren't in use anymore, so why not leave her to be found and taken in?"
T'Challa hummed, clasping his hands together as he replied.
"Let them try. They will not make it very far."
Bucky pursed his lips slightly before he murmured.
"It's...strange, honestly...seeing this from an outside perspective. I knew that this was serious, but I wasn't aware of how bad it actually was. Standing on the other side of the glass...it's almost poignant."
T'Challa nodded, replying with a hum.
"When my father was killed and I was under the assumption that it was you in Vienna, a deep hatred rooted within me for HYDRA. While I understand now that it was Zemo's schemes...that hatred for HYDRA has never wavered. Even now when knowing the dangers that lie beyond those doors, I still hope for peace."
Bucky was quiet, listening intently to T'Challa's words as the king spoke, his brown eyes downcast as he continued.
"Nobody deserves to be subjected to such horrific torture."
Bucky wasn't sure on how to respond. Instead, the man just nodded and took a moment to breathe before he settled, glancing over at T'Challa.
"You're right, and if we have to start from scratch, then I'm willing to help how I can...both with rehabilitating her and eradicating HYDRA once and for all."
T'Challa nodded quietly before turning to walk back towards the lab, suggesting over his shoulder.
"You should get some rest...and maybe put that on ice."
At the mention of the wound on his temple, it began to pulse, and Bucky just sighed.
"I'll sleep it off...and thank you for listening."
T'Challa didn't respond, but a smile graced the king's lips as he disappeared through the doors. Bucky's shoulders sagged slightly, and he rubbed his temple gently, wincing when he pressed down to hard.
He had to admit: that woman could give a mean right-hook.
-
STORY NOTES: Bucky, T'Challa, Steve, and Shuri are all within her lab with the Winter Soldier. So far, the Winter Soldier has made no move. Shuri is using a machine that heals and reconstructs the soldier's knee, and Bucky is perturbed by the damage he had inflicted. He reflects on the hardship it took to regulate the strength of his grip in his metal arm; reminiscing about the difficulty of clutching a glass of water.
Shuri then tells the group that she would like to begin deconstructing the Winter Soldier's mind to get an understanding of her intentions, and suggests activating the Winter Soldier again should Shuri's efforts fail. Steve is apprehensive, and Shuri voices that if neither efforts are successful, then she will have to completely reboot the Winter Soldier.
Shuri elaborates that she is currently attempting to figure out the identity of the Winter Soldier, and makes a remark that she hopes Tony Stark is also doing the same. Steve comments that Natasha Romanoff, the Black Widow, is also combing through the databank Bucky had downloaded, as well as previously recovered databanks.
When a scientist attempts to inject a sedative into her, the Winter Soldier begins to resist; causing a scene and consequently breaking the needle of the sedative within her neck. Steve observed that the woman understood what the syringe meant, and T'Challa points out that it might be a sign that she is remembering.
Before Steve's departure, Bucky voices his fear that HYDRA is using her to get to him, and Steve reassures Bucky that he won't let HYDRA get their hands on him again. Steve exits with T'Challa, and Bucky and Shuri are left alone within the lab. Shuri begins to remove a bit of the woman's clothing, and more scars are revealed.
Bucky becomes upset by the sight of the scars, understanding what they meant, and Bucky begins to become apprehensive about saving the woman. Shuri reassures Bucky that what they are doing is right. Later, Shuri shows Bucky a digital rendition of the Winter Soldier's brain and explains what she is going to do in order to save the woman's core identity.
Shuri comments that Bucky should see Steve off, and though Bucky tries to get to Steve before he leaves, he is unsuccessful. Instead, he meets with T'Challa. They begin to converse with each other, Bucky revealing his concerns, and T'Challa reassures him that HYDRA would not make it far into Wakanda if they attempted to retrieve him. Bucky makes a final thought on the woman and reflects on her strength. End scene.
TAGLIST: @vicmc624 @tilldeathripsusapart
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martiae · 3 days ago
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from me to you | pepe martí
“all of the girls you’ve loved before, made you the one i’ve fallen for” ♡ (inspired by to all the boys i’ve loved before!)
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synopsis: you’ve been in love with your childhood best friend since you were 6. when you were 13, you decided to start writing love letters to him. you never planned on sending them but they somehow made their way to his house?
pairing: pepe marti x reader (y/n) adler | genre: highschool au, smau, fluff, slight angst | warnings: some cursing, suggestive jokes from christian (haha), gianna/gigi is an oc, y/n is kind of irritating because she assumes a lot !!
chapter 1 : ignorance is bliss
now playing : i think he knows — taylor swift
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you waited at the bus stop a few blocks from your house, your mind totally occupied by the mortifying events that happened yesterday.
while you didn’t want to think about it at all, it was hard not to. your mind was constantly playing the moment back.
you wondered how much he read, how he felt when he read it, what his face looked like, his thoughts, etc.
but, a part of you also really did not want know. your heart was sadly fragile, super sensitive to anything relating to pepe.
you knew it was stupid; but, you really thought that you could just peacefully like him. you were waiting for your feelings to just go away, a confession seeming out of reach.
you had to get a grip, you needed to figure out how to go about this whole situation since you knew that he would most likely not drop it.
the bus began to approach the stop, a part of you feeling happy that you had some more time to put together a plan for today.
you sat down at the window seat, the seat feeling very comfortable, yet, undeniably cold.
it was nice though. you finally had some peace and quiet, and could focus on what was important.
that focus broke quickly when a familiar figure sat next to you, their head instantly looking at you.
“hi there”
you wanted to scream. no, you actually wanted to get off the bus and run back home. your plans of peace, tranquility, and happiness was totally interrupted by the guy.
your eyes widened, your mouth parting in a surprised expression. your guys eye contact and silence existing for a long time.
“you’re still not talking to me?” pepe asked, his eyebrow quirking up.
you stayed silent, trying to disassociate from the fact that the boy you’ve been in love with for 11 years is trying to talk to you after finding out you like him.
pepe smiled to himself as he looked down, a small chuckle coming from his mouth. your heart skipped a beat, his stupidly cute smile has always had some kind of effect on you. and you know very well that you probably wrote some very cringey (but true) things about it in your letters.
oh god, just thinking about him reading your bare emotions and feelings about him has you feeling like laying out on the road. this was torture!
pepe looked back at you, his smile not leaving his face yet. you returned back to looking in front of you, the bus coming to a sudden halt.
the force made you lean forward; but, pepe quickly put his palm in front of you and his other hand holding onto your shoulder.
you leaned back, looking at him in surprise.
he chuckled, “didn’t want you hitting your head on the chair..”
your face became slightly flushed, a very soft expression on your face, “thank you”
pepe smiled again, his hand letting go of you and returning to his lap.
“are you going to explain the letters now?”
you tried to not show your shock; but, it appeared on your face before you could control it.
you were praying for the bus to drive faster, you just wanted to go to school and avoid him at every opportunity. its hard to ignore him over text. but, it’s even harder to ignore him in person.
“one more stop” you chanted in your head.
pepe sighed with frustration, “come on..anything? as i said im not mad at all! i just really want an explanation or something! please give me something to grasp!”
you saw the bus begin to pull towards your school, your face relaxing.
“please? something?..” he explained.
the bus stopped, the door’s opening quickly. you looked at him before murmuring a small “bye” and speed walking towards the exit.
you could hear pepe calling your name from behind but decided to sprint to the campus, your adrenaline running.
that was the worst 7 minutes and 34 seconds of your life. (yes you were counting.)
pepe was a guy who was sweet, calm but also expressive, and passionate. he was strong willed and smart and honestly, perfect. he was the guy who every girl has had a crush on before, the guy who would be the best boyfriend and would never fail to impress your family, and just be the guy you’d plan on marrying.
he was all of those things. scratch that, he is all of those things. but because he’s all of those things, you know that it couldn’t work out.
“oh my god, i tried catching up to you but you were running for your life!�� gianna said out of breath.
you were panting, still recovering from your very quick run to your class.
“he….was…at….the…bus…stop.” you let out with many breaths.
gianna’s face lit up in shock and excitement, her hands covering her mouth.
“no way! spill now!”
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you went the whole school day on guard, observing carefully to not run into pepe. it was kind of pathetic, even you could admit it. you were practically on edge and running away from him because you knew that it was getting harder and harder to face him. you did not want to confess, hell, you didn’t want to do anything. you wished you could reverse time and stop your 13 year old self from beginning the disturbing trend of writing sappy love letters addressed to him.
gosh, this whole situation really made you feel insane! it was hard to just let it pass without feeling the pain of embarrassment.
“(name)!” gianna called.
“oh hey gigi!” you smiled.
“hey! any updates?”
you sighed before looking her in the eye, “i’ve been avoiding him all day.”
gianna groaned, “oh come on! you can’t ignore him forever!”
“i don’t want to ignore him. it’s getting really hard to do that. i just, gosh, i really just don’t know what to do.”
“i get it. but i also don’t. what are you so afraid of?” gianna questioned.
you wanted to say ‘everything’. it was true. you were scared of hearing his voice tell you that he didn’t feel the same, his reaction when you tell him it’s true, oh god, it seriously was the most embarrassing thing in the world.
“i’m afraid of the truth. i really wanted to hold onto my crush and just peacefully love him.”
gianna frowned before turning to stand in front of you, both of you guys stopping.
“the truth may be scary. you may expect him to not feel the same; but anything’s possible. while i know how crazy those letters are, trust me, i can say for sure that you shouldn’t ignore him anymore. he deserves an explanation.”
gianna was right, and she knew she was too.
with a sigh, you nodded.
to face him after this all is like opening mary poppin’s bag. there’s no certainty at all, and you knew that it was going to be so uncomfortable.
gianna’s eyes began to drift to behind you, your natural instinct telling you to look.
you turned to see pepe standing behind you, a shy expression reflecting on his face.
“good luck!” gianna cheered before walking out the gate.
“gigi!” you shouted.
she began to skip happily, an obvious taunt to your calling.
“gianna!”
you turned around to look back at pepe, who’s hand was touching his neck shyly.
oh god. you were done for. you could tell that he was annoyed, or maybe angry? fear began to make an appearance on your face, your body staying frozen.
“can we talk now?”
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capricioussun · 8 months ago
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2am post jumpscare
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kissingarthurclaus · 6 months ago
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I am nothing if I don't follow the whims of my heart wherever they may lead!!! Lazytown self insert!! 😳💖💖
She lives in Lazytown and I'm debating whether to make her Stephanie's cousin or just another citizen, but either way the particular reason she isn't as active as she could be is she's scared of EVERYTHING. Yes, I've thrust upon her my issues with anxiety (inspired partly by the recent wave I've been experiencing over the past few days 😅) she's scared of cars, birds, germs, certain types of bugs, and it leads to her feeling safer at home.
The lessons she learns with Sportacus and the others are to teach that even though the world can be scary, you can overcome it and get out there and experience all the good in it! 🥺💖
Taglist♡: @me-myself-and-my-fos @tiny-cloud-of-flowers @sunstar-of-the-north @dearly-beeloved @adoredbyalatus @changeling-selfship @crushes-georg @miutonium @cherry-bomb-ships @rosieaurora @rejaytionships @sunflawyer @in-true-blue-love @tropicalgothships @little-miss-selfships @cupiidzbow (as always pls let me know if you need to be added or removed!)
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gingermintpepper · 5 months ago
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Hi!! I don't know if you remember me, but I'm the person you explained the Castalia thing to a few days ago. I've been following you for a while now, but I just managed to go through your blog well and proper, and I'm here to express both my gratitude for the amount of info and links you've shared (I did NOT know about the hepatoscopy and haruspicy, and I'm about to go down a lengthy rabbit hole) and my horror at once again being given a new hyperfixation (I didn't imagine wanting to read about liver-divination help).
Also, also, are you the author of Exeunt Phoebus Apollo on AO3 because that was the fic that sent me on this greek mythology spree, and it's so good I got obsessed with Apollo, and he's everywhere around me now. Thank you for writing it!
AAAAAA THIS IS SO SWEET?? THANK YOU!! I do remember you and hey man, I'm always happy to help <33
I'm so glad to recruit someone else to my hepatoscopy group because it is a long and storied tradition with many many different types of study and schools of thought dating all the way back to the Sumerians! It's an extremely underrated bit of study when it comes to sketching portraits of divination and prophecy when it comes to adaptations of imaginings of greek myth works - similar to bird augury (which was such a widespread skill that most people had some level of understanding of the basics of what the omens of common birds meant the way people now can look at the clouds over head and know if it'll rain and when approximately that rain'll happen).
It's a great and common misunderstanding that things like prophecy and magic were these fantastic elements that had no tangible features to their practices and while there's nothing wrong with interpreting things as more fantastical for the sake of coolness or aesthetic, I personally think these elements are interesting enough to be worth looking into and portraying!
Also yes, I did write Exeunt 😳I'm very very honoured that you enjoyed my work so much and I'm even more grateful that it could let you see the Apollo in everything 💖 Thank you for reading it!!
#ginger answers asks#HAPPY HARUSPICING!!#Idk man this stuff is just super interesting#I know the Argonauts aren't a very popular tale (for some reason)#But Medea's works of magic are also some of the clearest we get to see descriptions of in text#And part of why the morality of Medea is something that's so widely debated even now is because of what her magic entailed#I personally love stuff like that#Communing with the gods in greek myth always necessitates some kind of sacrifice#The link must literally be made in blood and when mistakes are made or ceremony is ignored#those prices are also paid in blood#now to modern sensibilities it seems cruel or unusual#but many religions in antiquity worked on these bases and the spilling of blood meant more than violence or death or ill omen#There were so many other nuances to it in terms of honour in death or divine death etc etc#One can be very cynical and say 'oh well it doesn't matter they were still killing things and there's nothing cool about that'#And to that I say buddy you're in the wrong hobby#If you can only perceive the spilling of blood whether human or animal as gross/murder/etc etc then you REALLY shouldn't be consuming#pagan culture and tradition LMFAO#Apollo was like#The Butcher God#There's no point is erasing half of his identity to make him some sterile always nice positive good god#He was a hunter a butcher blood stained a sacrificer#Of course blood would be but a language to him#Anyway all of that is to say hepatoscopy is cool and there's a ton of reading to do about it#Fly free my liver brethren!! Fly free!!!!
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joffyworld · 2 months ago
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DJJDHDHSN TERUUUUUUUUUU
EVERYONE SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO @losing-catharsis !!!!! Here’s more Old Faith content cus it’s her favorite AU <33
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nabaath-areng · 2 months ago
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Whenever I feel bad about symptoms from my illnesses, I think of my sibling's horse growing up, whose name was Batman and who was so allergic to grass he had to be wrapped up like a christmas present every summer to prevent rashes. I don't know if that makes me feel better exactly, but if Batman could cope and continue to mosey around like the gentle old man he was, then maybe I can cope with being completely bedridden certain days.
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xxplastic-cubexx · 2 months ago
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am i tripping or is x3 relatively way better than dark phoenix like,,, obviously the second half of x3's plot is atrociously wrong (apart from when erik keeps bringing up charles) but the initial set up and premise feel less flat than dark phoenix with more things going on than just jean/phoenix and erik and the brotherhood don't feel as shoehorned?
i fear i feel you ..... however ive always held the belief X3 wasnt a terrible movie on the sole basis hank was there and the movie started with old man bickering while adopting their daughter so this aint a shocking opinion to meee
'but snap hank was in dark phoenix too' ok he didnt piss me off in X3 !!!!! moving on !!!!!!!!
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somegrumpynerd · 4 months ago
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Hiii!!!! You're my best friend and I think ur so cool!!!! <333
Also!! If you could meet any Sans who would you pick?
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Ahk;jdjkbdjkb Pigeon I'm gonna die you can't be surprise nice to me like this!!!!! Bro that's so sweet ;A; You're my best friend too and you're way cooler!!! You know how all the layers and features and stuff in art programs work and you're good with animals and you're getting college educated - what a cool friend!!!!! <3
Oh god... that's a good question :oc
I mean Killer and Nightmare and all of the gang are out, I would get myself stabbed in record time around them lol
I think either Classic, Swap or Fell. Like, Swap is such a lil ball of positive energy and I know he has that "I don't have a lot of friends" energy buried in him so I'd love to hang out and hype him up. Me and Fell could bond over being grumpy and sweaty and bad at taking affection lol and who wouldn't wanna hang out with THE Sans? Eat some fries, tell some jokes and take a nap? Ideal day
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seacavepuzzle · 1 year ago
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87 / 127
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ectonurites · 1 year ago
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SUPER DARK TIMES (2017) DIR. KEVIN PHILLIPS
#super dark times#zach taylor#allison bannister#sam edits#if you listen closely you can hear the sound of both mine and Allison's hearts breaking! <3#ok but fr: i know this is gifs. so no sound. but the WAY he DELIVERS the 'you've got a bump on your head' line makes me NUTS#it's so soft. it's so fond. it's... it's a punch in the fucking gut. he likes her *so much* but he *can't let himself have this nice#thing with her* because he's *being eaten alive by guilt he can't accept & won't let himself be happy because of it* and SHE DOESN'T KNOW!#like the thing. the thing is. when you watch SDT you're along the ride with Zach and his POV of everything. despite the obvious paranoia#& guilt warping his perspective/influencing his behavior—we can see where that's all coming from. we understand the motivations#behind the actions he takes. but ALLISON? Allison has no fucking clue what's going on! from Allison's perspective... Zach is this guy she's#known for a while (like they make a point of *telling us* in one of the earliest scenes that Zach feels weird talking about her in the#detached way they may talk abt other people in their grade they barely know—because it's *different* since he and Josh *actually know her*#plus in the script [and it STILL COUNTS TO ME because she *starts* saying the line but just gets cut off by Dennis] Allison brings#up Zach & Josh having had a silly handshake since 7th grade ['oh god that used to make me pee!' <- girl why would u say that to him]#so it's like... these are kids who've known each other for years!) and he's got this obvious fucking crush on her (the hallway scene where#he is. blatantly staring and she catches him for a second) and the moment she decides to actually start pursuing him because SHE'S#got a crush on HIM too... he starts pulling away and acting erratic and sending her the most mixed signals in the fucking world.#and sheee THINKSSS ITS HERRR FAULT!!!!!!!! like. listen. this scene i giffed above? this is what she's fucking talking about later#when she jokes about not wanting to 'scare him off again'. like sure she says it like a joke but... uhm. i simply think there's#a certain amount of truth to it too—because he DID leave the party visibly freaked out! and i think it'd be perfectly believable for her#to think that it was at least partially HER pushing too hard that was causing him to withdraw/pull away from her. plus she blatantly says#she thinks she's the reason Josh & Zach are fighting. like. this poor girl is on the outskirts of a tragedy she'll probably NEVER know the#details of but she's seeing firsthand the impact it's having on Zach and... blaming herself... that's so fucking heartbreaking
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tittysuckersworld · 25 days ago
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should i make a soukoku fan manga just because a silly joke at wnd of a animatic gave me too many ideas.....
#look if you know you know/jjj#i dont gatekeep its the im in love with a monster soukoku one#at the end chuuya tortures dazai by cutting bandages near him and im just. i got ideas okay#so. dazai asks chuuya to ses his scars. this happens before things start and manga starts where chuuya sabout to cut one#then you get the exposition and how chuuya has let dazai see his vulnerability and chuuya wont let this suisidle idiot go from some scars#so then gets consents again and the bandages are cut. little by little. going up dazais arm as he panics and panics and#tada! pamic attack!! chuuya stops as soon as he notices and gets a cloth to cover dazais arm as he trys to comfort him#this is where it gets a little confusing. other plot happens and defedently a few days to a week passez#dont know full details but it leads to dazai wanting to try again and chuuya reluctantly agreeing. as long as they try something#aka dazai gets blindfolded (fully. this is like when there 17-18) and chuuya gently unravels them this time so they can be reravled if need#before starts theres some banter but its clear theyre both nervous. so when chuuya finally starts. its super tense#and then chuuya starts kissing the scars. each one. slowky as dazai is unravled. amd difhsjf its soft#no teasing remarks. just gentle messages amd soft touches mutterd to the skin and oh god it makes dazai cry#as soon as chuuya notices he stops but dazai tells him to keep going. so he dose#this comic could be interpreted as smutty but how it ends to me is more soft words and cuddles at the end. a soft nice end#just smth to feel good and fluffy and cry to cause fuckkkk is soft
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badcountryofficial · 3 months ago
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Thinks abt how the one person in my family I really relate to and respect settled in her marriage and later wakes up in a cold sweat
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elegyofthemoon · 8 months ago
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😊
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