#I'm sorry for pushing you away
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I'm sorry that i can't communicate all of my feelings, they feel so strage to me. I'm sorry that I'm distant and pushing you away when you just want to help me and be here for me. but i don't want you to be here when I'm drowning in this darkness, i don't want you to see me vulnerable, i don't want you to see how dark everything could get. but also asking for help is never my thing, i prefer to do it all on my own. i can do it all on my own, so don't worry. and i never forget you, i don't hate you, i just sometimes hate myself so much that i don't think i deserve a friend, or a hand. you deserve better, always. maybe not me as a friend, I'm bad. I'm the worst. so, it's okay if you want to go and leave me. i won't blame you. i can't blame you. because i would leave me too if i could tho.
#personal#me to my friends#I'm sorry for pushing you away#i wish everything would stop#i hate my life#i hate everything#i hate my brain#i hate myself#depressing shit#kinda depressing#mentally unstable#mentally fucked#this is depressing#self destruction#mentally tired#self sabotaging#self hate#self sabotage#pushing away#push away#i am lonely#i hate feeling lonely#loneliness#my thoughts#depressed#walk away#burning bridges
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I fuck everything up. I'm alone. I don't have anyone. I pushed everyone away. Even in the year and a half or whatever amount of time is been, I'm still just a shell. I'm really sorry for being a disappointment, I'm sorry for being annoying, I'm sorry for hiding away. I'm so sorry.
#all i do is fuck everything up#i break everything i touch#i sent stupid depressing post on accident when for months I've been meaning to say hi#i miss speaking to you#I'm sorry for pushing you away#im sorry i didnt say happy birthday or happy new year#the first time in two years i say anything is a stupid fucking post that you shouldnt have to see#im sorry
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Deep deep fear that one day all my friends are gonna decide they just don't wanna talk to me anymore for whatever reason and unfortunately, I won't get the memo and will keep trying and that'll just make them hate me more :(
#Logically in my LOGICAL brain I know that's silly#I wish I was not like this cause it causes so much fucking stress#for no reason#for imaginary reasons that don't exist#I also shouldn't be this anxious cause my friends aren't like that#they are all very good to me#and they probably don't have reasons to do that but I could give them several#I have very good friends that I really don't deserve but I'm too afraid to push people away so :)#vent tw#urghh sorry it's gettin so bleak on main#just having a rough night after a nice weekend#I think the combo of nightmares + feeling good lately has destroyed me lmao#anyway Kid Leo Update tomorrow#yayyy#don't respond to this it's just me yeling at the void#if you see this and we're friends uhhh no I will not elaborate actually I am just gonna sleep it off
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i have a counter argument to the 'only one person can boop bill' thing, mabel. she's the type of person to slap stickers on people, she would definitely be the type to also boop others occasionally and bill would be no exception. she probably doesn't do it to annoy bill like dipper would, but maybe as a form of a friendly gesture, kind of like those people who will lightly punch friends in the arm when they hang out.
You know what? Good point. Mabel would get away with more than most, as a fun-loving lady! Bill understands those impulses, and being a touchy person! He indulges in similar ones himself.
Though when Bill's not in the mood to be playful and gets booped anyway? The 'sister-in-law' status grants her considerable grace.
#answers#Though in addition to that - Mabel's general chaos and level of Fun Times is something Bill genuinely likes#Catch these two having one too many margaritas and slinging arms over each other's shoulders while singing too loud and off key#She'd have some leeway even without the brother situation#But Mabel gets a pass on things she normally wouldn't purely on the merit of 'this would piss off the spouse'#The thing about Bill is he's genuinely fun to party with - right up until he decides you're the pinata#Even now there are times when she thinks she's doing something 'cute' and Bill was NOT in the mood but just has to grin and bear it#Instead of breaking fingers one by one#Dipper is singular in his ability to get away with Pretty Much Everything#It's love yest but it's also communication and personality I'm afraid#If Bill DID call Dipper out on doing something Too Far he'd get an embarrassed and apologetic husband. With kisses of sorry.#Though in minor circumstances: he starts arguing with him#Turns out that bickering is a better way to deescalate with Bill than most other tactics and Dipper's a pro#Now Bill's gotta think semi-rationally to Win The Argument instead of acting on impulse.#And in the process of debate he not only: learns where his husband's coming from but has time to cool off#Congratulations Dipper! Your Nerdy Logic brain and ability to Rise to a Challenge prevent Bill from going immediately nuclear#Plus showing off that big sexy intellect of yours doesn't hurt#Whereas I see Mabel pushing one of Bill's few boundaries and then deflecting. She ain't great at conflict#Brushing it off and laughing; Jeez it was just for fun!! Lighten up already!#Exactly what Bill says when HE'S being a dick to someone!#Which is why he'd react Very Badly to that excuse#Ha ha! Fun! Of course Bill loves fun! You know what HE thinks is FUN#Barbecue. Flash-fried pork ribs. Where's that stupid pig#Dipper has to disarm that particular bomb and I highly doubt it's a pleasant process
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It really is strange how Edelstans simultaneously dig hard into people that don't agree with their specific interpretation of 3H to the point of being happy they manage to drive those people away... and be so upset and baffled that people become generally disinterested/actively hostile towards 3H content.
If folks get repeatedly driven out of a fandom, and that group of people repeatedly calls anyone who disagrees with their specific interpretation of 3H stupid/illiterate/"acting in bad faith"/sexist/racist/homophobic/etc., and it is repeatedly done by a group of people who insist that 3H's fandom problem is a "both sides" thing, with all of this being dragged into spaces that have nothing to do with 3H, well... obviously people are then going to start to dislike interacting with either 3H in general or its fandom in particular?
Edelstans are the ones spreading the idea that 3H's fandom in totality is shit. They keep trying to make their hands look cleaner than they are by claiming that everyone else's hands are just dirty as/even dirtier than theirs. Of course people who are unaware of everything are going to then assume that everyone's hands are dirty, thus making people not exactly want to shake hands with anyone.
Like, really now. What did they think was going to happen when they directly go after fanartists/fanfic writers who create/say things that go against the Approved Edelstan Status Quo, to the point that a non-zero amount of these creators just up and leave social media entirely? Or after they nitpick every single Disapproved Post and then lie about the post's OP? Or after it becomes a consistent pattern that people who even remotely disagree with Edelstans' opinions are always, without fail, buried with insulting and harassing anons? Or after they're shown time and time again to defend their worst actors with "well their/our victims deserved it because they said a 3H opinion we didn't agree with"? Or when they say that everyone does this shit in 3H's fandom except for them (which is either not believed because it's demonstrably untrue or is actually believed and now those people think the overwhelming majority of 3H's fandom is filled with shit)? Or when they drag 3H discourse into literally actually everything no matter how unrelated?
That with less fandom creators within the fandom space they'd get more content? That harassing and insulting people and accusing them of being this-and-that bigot is going to magically "correct" their minds into seeing The One Truth about 3H? That people are going to just look over all the shit they did just because they allocate the blame of their action on all of 3H's fandom? That people would like 3H more if they constantly remind people of the inarguable worst thing to come from 3H? That this would help 3H's general perception?
Fuckin' no, of course that's just going to make everyone fuck off from 3H. And would you look at that, a shit ton of people have fucked off from 3H since everything has been swept under a "well it'sth a bolth thides ithue tho what can ya do?" rug. And it's been swept under that rug by pretty much the only people who are pulling this shit, who then get shocked - utterly gobsmacked! - that that made them look bad too. That crying "both sides!" included themselves too and not just the people they've been harassing. That saying that the entire fandom is bad everywhere made the entire fandom look bad everywhere.
If Edelstans are really so upset that no one talks about 3H positively anymore, then maybe they should stop being the reason no one likes 3H anymore. Just a thought
#edelgard discourse#just to be safe#like I'm sorry the other parts of the fandom are of course not perfect and should ALSO be called out when they pull shit#but NO ONE is as bad as Edelstans as a group (in 3H's fandom). like. objectively#I say this as someone who is ALSO sad to see 3H become such a heated topic:#it's honestly annoying as hell to see them bitch and moan about how nobody seems to want to talk about 3H anymore#cuz like I'm sorry you do NOT get to whine about people leaving your house after you forcefully pushed them out#like this is obviously what YOU wanted!! a fandom space that is bereft of anyone you disagree with!!#if that means that the fandom is way more empty of new art maybe that says something about YOU and the people YOU wanted to be around you#maybe no one likes y'all because y'all are insufferable and not because y'all like a certain set of pixels and lines on a screen. perhaps#''they hate us because we like Edelgard'' actually it's the harassment and open sexism and victim-blaming and superiority + victim complexe#the entitlement the refusal to ever admit you're wrong about literally anything the dogpiling#the never-ending need to remind people of discourse they want to move away from#and about a million other fuckin' things#simply stop being the problem you're complaining about
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Dick or no dick confirmation Pickles was always going to be trans to me anyways; if he's swingin' somethin that's phallo babes, if he's not then his t-dick fat. What's not to get.
#metalocalypse#jay talkin#I'm sorry they wrote that awful gross little man far too likeable and relatable to on a trans level#for me not to hoot and holler and cheer for the trans pickles agenda#changes nothing about his character arc or any of the show anyone is capable of being the kind of person he is#don't make the mistake of thinking thats exclusive to cis men#his transness wouldnt change that#only adds on an extra layer to him that i think works fantastically.#Listen that dude was rejected by his family driven to drink and drugs young to escape that ran away to be in a band#is called fucking Pickles of all things and refuses to tell anyone his real last name;#over the span of four seasons and two movies he slowly starts to learn to be for others what he never had#he becomes more caring more supportive#it's not a stretch to say he undoes some of the toxic masculinity he's been keeping himself shielded behind#and learns how to be a kinder man.#all of which have no contradictions with him being trans!#In fact it doesn't take much extra thought to find ways a lot of this can line up with some trans masculine experiences#i mean. Did no one else have a younger phase where they swung as far as they could into crass rude and uncaring ways#to try and assert their masculinity only to grow and realise that you can be a man and be more caring.#Did no one else have father issues. 1 800 come on now i know those are both shared experiences a lot of us have had LOL.#at the end of the day this show aired nearly 20 years ago and is finished. we're not getting more of it#so nothing is altered nor changed if pickles is canonically trans or not ok. its fine#i mean hell i dont even need canon confirmation hes trans to me and thats all i care abt#but i think if yr getting suuuuuper weird abt needing him not to be canonically trans you have some issues#and bio essentialist ideals of gender if you think only a cis man can act like he does#again. anyone can be like that. its not exclusive. him being trans would not change him in any way shape or form lol#AND ALSO GODDDUUUGH for once i love getting to see a guy pushing 50 whos depicted as trans#do you have any idea how dire and barren it is out here. we never get to see a trans guy older than 30 and whos not a pristine model#I WANT MORE OLD SHLUBBY SHITHEAD TRANS GUYS IN MEDIA
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Btw, not sorry for loving you : only redeeming quality is that it's not as disgusting as love in paradise. Otherwise it really feels like Jorge was just forced to put Calypso in the musical because it's an inevitable part of the Odyssey and didn't think twice about what he was writing. He sanitized Circe to remain family friendly then wrote this disgusting duology of songs. And we're left with nothing at the end of it because Calypso was just there and then gone. I mean no, not nothing, sorry I forgot that we have the luck to hear Odysseus claim that he loves his goddamn abuser. Yes that was essential to add. If at least at least he had cut this part then we could just be let to see what a monster Calypso is and then (try to) move on. But no she had to be forgiven. That is disgusting. No other word ever
#dammit I've been a calypso defender my whole life and this guy just ruined my record#no let's go and never listen to those songs again and pretend they never existed#which will be easy cause calypso was completely USELESS#her only purpose was to push me away from epic and make me cautious of every new word#epic the musical#the vengeance saga#epic the vengeance saga#I'm not sorry for loving you#musical: epic#song: not sorry for loving you#character: calypso (epic)#anti calypso epic#text#oli schist!
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@unbreakable-ribbons - Continued from here!)
Upon seeing the stranger back off in a hurry, Doom's eyes quickly un-narrow and her expression changes into one of mirth instead. She begins laughing and slapping at the knee of her pinstriped suit pants, as if this is one of the funniest things she's ever been a part of.
"Ehehehehehe! You people are just getting easier to scare these days, ehehehe!" she cackles, still bent over, and now she's rubbing at her eyes because they've started to water. Eventually she does straighten, though, a grin still firmly attached to her face. "Well, Manos, I'm Doomsday, and you know I've never liked that particular saying. 'If I were yours'. Implying ownership of a person. I wouldn't belong to you, nor you to me. I'd rather see it as a partnership - collective ownership over a united front. I dislike the idea of possessiveness. But I'm sure you didn't mean it that way, did you?"
#unbreakable ribbons#i'm sorry she's a menace#but she's kinda testing to see what she can get away with#don't let her push you around manos x)
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sometimes i remember the hunger games and how nobody actually paid attention to what was in those books
#americans close your eyes and ears right now#i'm well aware that my political takes are way too spicy for you all#and i really do wish my media diet didn't contain so much us-centric shit#but alas we're all suffering here#and i could say that 'oh actually it does matter who your president is for us in the world'#but it doesn't. it really fucking doesn't. that's kind of the point.#oh i'm sorry my spicy takes are already starting#anyway it is wild that you all can understand katniss assassinating coin at the end of mockingjay#but get super upsetty that chappell roan won't support your favorite presidential candidate with her full chest#like come on none of you actually thought that her using the phrase both sides meant that she was a republican or even a centrist#that's just copium#you all knew exactly what she meant#but i guess encouraging people to think critically and get involved with their local elections and politics as well is... bad now?#also... why do you all care so much about a random pop star's opinion and whether or not she dares to criticize a government#like... she's right but i'm sure 5 years from now if she survives in the limelight her edges will be completely chipped away#by all this insane reaction#and before anyone comes for me... no i'm not saying you shouldn't vote. please fucking do.#neither am i saying you shouldn't vote strategically or encourage other people to do so#but if all your energy is spent policing people who criticize your chosen party because of their own principles#then there's something seriously wrong with your politics#and all you're signalling is that you truly do not fucking care about the issues that they care about#if anything..... you RESENT them#and then the same people bring up the parable of the 'unjust man'#or how it's never the right time to talk about gun violence in your country#harm reduction is all good and based but attacking people who are leveraging their support to push your party left#is not. it's not even fucking helpful#anyway. don't base your lives and politics around pop stars.#even if they are more based than you 🤷#i think i'm done now thank you tumblr for letting me have insane rants in my tags that hopefully no one reads#idk i just find this all depressing. i wish you all cared more about the world outside of your bubble. i wish we all did - myself included.
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I'm waiting for the day when all these people who praise Nesta for being mean and hurt other people's feeling and call it a ✨bad bitch✨ behaviour
To cry about how Nesta is out of the character for not actively being a "bitch" to her family for no reason :)
#waiting for the day her fans calls her out for not having a backbone#shattering their imagination of how they see Nesta and pretend to know her#when they say “Nesta is hated for no reason so why she's called a bitch?”#Nesta hated HATED herself for acting that way#she got stuck in a loop of pushing people away and it got out of her hands#she hated herself for the pains she caused#but her fans completely ignore that#instead they focus on her being nasty to her sisters and her mate#she was suicidal for how she treated Feyre#and they have the audacity saying she never verbally abused her#instead they focus on how IC handled her even though she never hated them for it#the way she was thankful to Feyre and Rhysand#they don't even want to acknowledge these#because then that would ruin her “bad bitch” aesthetic...#can't wait for all of it#nesta archeron#I'm sorry you have fans who don't understand you</3
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growlssnarls. Does rageful backflip.
#not art#I had a good day at work today. Went smoothly did good at the things I'm payed to do#BUT. TWO THINGS#sorry I'm on my phone so autocorrect. Frowns.#Anyways the most useless guy on the team was in today#And I learned the ONLY reason he is here is because#He is the managers son. A fucking nepo baby!!!#He pisses me off so much. He can't do anything!!! No one tries to help/correct him-#Except the surly morning supervisor whom I love-#And it's easier to just. Fix his mistakes instead of trying to get through his THICK SKULL#And two. Just a rude customer which sucks.#We don't get those usually. Most of our customers are good natured redneck regulars#Anyways she insulted me AFTER I gave her her stupid little drink so I ouldnt like. Spit in it#At least she's good at being a bitch lol#She was like 'ehrn was the last time you washed your hair?' TO MY FACE and quickly walked away#My hair was fucked up coz I was just out changing the garbages. So like. Context. BUT#what a bitch. Shes come in before so if I see her again then. Well.#I spent a lot of time teaching myself how to farmers blow as a child. BITCH 🖕🖕🖕#At least I got to see that handsome lil fattie I Yap about today. when I was leaving. Haven't seen him all week so ❤️❤️😺#He pushes grocery carts sooo cute style 💕💕💕😻#..sighs.. I don't ljke being a teen#personal#Thanks for listening my diary and co 🫵🫶#Nonchalantly goes afk again 🫡🫡
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柄本 佑 || 「光る君へ」 (2024) · 第四十二回 「川辺の誓い」
#柄本佑#tasuku emoto#光る君へ#hikaru kimi e#1x42#made by me#fujiwara no michinaga#藤原道長#okay I dont think I need to say anything gosh I'm so sad#I am totally crashed by the Uji river scene#crash is an understatement#I know what they have has never changed over the years#but cant help but wonder#if they ran away after ep09#would their life together be better?#michinaga became unrecognizably dark and greedy and he can't even look at himself in a mirror#and they'd wasted so much TIME away from each other#even before michinaga fell sick#he went to mahiro to talk about his daughters. his position. if she had any idea to get him back in higher power#and then he said 'sorry I shouldnt bother you with this bs'#he kept pushing people away#all his life he'd done that#he never once cherished people when they were around#the tears to me feel like remorse & regret#he has everything#but TIME with mahiro#with kaneie. with michikane. with people he should've loved more#should've treated yukinari better#should've dealt the naohide thing in a better way#should've loved mahiro harder.
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Omg...... Like Mother, Like Daughter is doomed Yuri (half yuri? One sided yuri?). TT0TT Sol doesn't feel the same way I'm pretty sure (sadly), but Som is DEF down bad. TT0TT And Som's not exactly the most mentally stable jakfjdksalfj (I think she has a bit of a "Sol's my pet" vibe going on as well. Som means well but she is NOT healthy either jfakslfj oh this is just going to be a fucking wreck I'm ready let's GO!)
(spoilers under cut, also under cut cause length and pictures)
Like she saw the boy Sol is hanging out with and was just ">:("
*sobbing* She is SO DONE when she finds out they are dating TT0TT
*sobs* ahhhh! klasjfdk OhmyGOAD SHE is tREMBLING as Sol tells her how she got with the guy TT0TT
She is literally SULLEN that Sol and guy have been dating FOR A MONTH! she looks os SICK TT0TT
My poor girl is literally doing the Arthur fist clench with her fist TT0TT
Som! Som! Girlie! I don't think this is just a friendship for you anymore.
LKFJDASKLFJKLAJFKL WAIT
"Anyone can see at first glance that he's good for nothing. But how does she not see that?"
OHHHHH MY GOD SHE'S LIEK 'HE SMELLY. HE STANK. HE POOR. HE BROKE. HE TOO NORMAL FOR HER." GURL! GET OFF THE FLOOOOOR!
"To be honest, I wish they'd break up" NO YOU DON'T SAY???? nEVER WOULD'VE GUESS!
Oh I was just here for the matricide but I've been blessed with more angst! Let's goooooo!!!!!!!!!
#“i'm sorry silly.... what's this about matricide?” Her moms a killer and killed her brother and she's just an absolute controlling pscyho-#-to the point som thought SHE was going to die before she got to high school if she didn't get perfect grades#lady deserves it but this isn't about her atm#like mother like daughter#like mother like daughter webtoon#like mother like daughter spoilers#i need to yap about this i'm sorry TT0TT#i had a feeling when she said 'life partner' in the other episode#the korean word can mean like an actual romantic partner buuuuut one of the words has been associated with pets#and she did compare sol to a pet in a sense#Somyung Gil#Look-Alike Daughter#똑 닮은 딸#webtoon#oh wait i never posted the other thing kafjdlksajflk TT0TT#som sweetie let's not call your crush a “stray dog”#the term you are looking for is “girlfriend”#now go listen to “i wanna ruin our friendship” and “good luck babe” you'll feel better#ugh I skipped a head a few chapters and the author is pushing some guys on som TT0TT#(I don't mind the boys they're cute but ahfkljsaklf you got me ATTACHED to Sol don't switch up on me now???)#For real tho Som needs therapy not a partner. Get her away from her mom and let her recover#I love how it's showing her slowly spiral into a villain arc and yesss I saw her becoming way too obsessed with Sol but oof there's some#def romantic tension in there and that's juicy#But right now things are just going to get worse if Som stays near her mom TT0TT#hopefully this thriller isn't a tragedy I need my girl to win!
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Hazbin Hotel thoughts (with a splash of vague theories) (Alastor edition)
Something that is super fascinating about how Alastor's character has been left highly up to interpretation is that, before these next episodes at least, it's not entirely clear what his motives are.
We know he is a skilled manipulator, a master of wording things in his favour to get the deals he wants. We know he's a serial killer that puts the laughter in slaughter, yet still has a variation of a moral code. We know he has ties, likely to lilith (though personally I really hope it ends up that he made a deal before he died for power, which now haunts him in hell).
We know that he partly protects the hotel because it's where he has a new radio broadcaster, but his protection of it could be protection for him, for what demon would mess with a friend (father figure?) of the princess of hell? Even Lucifer can't actually hurt him without hurting Charlie, regardless of how authentic Alastor is towards her.
Is his song purely to manipulate Charlie into feeling safer around him? Is he slowly wearing down her defenses so she may accidentally (or even purposefully) make a deal with him? It's clear from the dialogue and interactions that he's not incorporating himself much into the group, and we still don't know what's up with his radio broadcasting system being up once more.
There's so many ways it can be interpreted, but it's fun to have a character that is both mysterious but also bound to a set of morals he doesn't care to explain. He is the master of his own life, and (likely) sees others as lesser because they're weaker/manipulatable/"stupid". Yet his morals are just present enough that he could find it dishonorable to destroy demons that have, perhaps in his eyes, given up power for a chance at redemption.
There's also other questions around his character too, my biggest one being whether he has 1 power source or two? Many times we see his power/magic manifest as red hues (symbols specifically), similar to how he wears all red. Other times it is green, which may or may not be tied to his "neon" colours. Is it because red and green are complimentary but conflicting? Is it to show that one power is fully his and the other is not? Does the neon represent a lack of truthfulness or him acting outside of his true wishes? Because the only time we've really seen it is when he is saying (somewhat) nice things in very specific situations.
Does Alastor know Vaggie is/was an angel? He didn't like her in the pilot, and its unclear whether their strained dynamic is because Vaggie wants to protect Charlie and it is one sided, or if Alastor knows and is waiting for the perfect moment to use that against her, perhaps for a deal?
Also his only songs so far have been him just taking over someone else's song. How petty and silly of him. Can't wait to see what he has planned next!
Who knows! Either way Hazbin Hotel is a very fun show and I'm so excited for the next episodes!!
#syncrovoid.txt#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel alastor#alastor the radio demon#I have SO SO SO many thoughts about this guy. There's so much I wish the show had more time to go into and give some space to breathe#I wish the season wasn't planned to be so short#also dad beat dad?? favourite episode. im sorry but the interactions? the character driven mess pf whatever went on?#healthy vs unclear vs unhealthy relationships and the complications of isolation?#the show has a target audience and it is me. I'm sorry#on a side note i appreciate how they are handling angel dust. showing how it cant be as easy a fix as just walking away and that#there are reasons people end up in bad situations and that it isnt that they are inherently wrong or bad or broken#life is a series of events and sometimes those events are unfair and mean and push someone deeper and deeper into a pit#even if you want help it can be hard. sometimes self destruction can seem like a kindness in the face of aimless oblivion#anywho
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#ptsd keeps me awake#the nightmares are horrific#everything hurts#i don't know how long this episode will last#push everyone away. isolate. be safe. you're not safe#you're not safe with anyone#therapists won't call me back#i'm terrified#i'm so sorry i'm so broken#the people in my life deserve better than a broken doll#i hate you for what you've done to me#ruining the ONLY good thing i've ever known#this was your karma.#“i'll be with you forever. long after you leave me”#you took half my life before i escaped. leave me alone#you're the devil incarnate.#i hope you rot in hell.
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last rb stressed me out lowkey akakska i had an ex like that and it became a self fulfilling prophecy kinda thing..
#like oof where do i even begin#for one... would recommend looking up what pedestalling is so u can catch urself when ur doing it.#and. hm. honestly even working on self worth n whatnot i think rly internalizing not 2 pedestal ppl cuts out a lot of self sabotage#like hello ppl in ur life r there bc they choose to be. you are worth it to them and they are showing u that w action.#u gotta be vulnerable.. u gotta trust in other ppl.. cautious optimism is fine but 😮💨😮💨#i hate when ppl assume what im thinking and feeling and act upon that. assumptions on assumptions.#my mom was like that in a mean spirited vindictive way. my ex would spiral if i took too long to respond stressed as hell#thinking that i had all these horrible thoughts about her or that i was just using her like holy shit I'm just sitting here drawing ajsjka#i am trying to make friends. i am recovering from my own personal circumstances and trying to figure myself out etc.#was also actively working on finding myself as a trans woman bc it was so early in my transition.#idk. like damn ppl have Lives‚ hobbies‚ other ppl they talk to‚ they take time for themselves.#if u don't know and ur stressed about it‚ ask..? but then believe ppl when they answer idk.#sorry.. I've annoyed myself lmao. it was wild... things were dead simple on my end but she came up w hella things she swore HAD to have bee#true and after breaking up w her she kept DMing me w long ass self deprecating vents and mischaracterisations#i had to block her after a while like 😐 u ever see somebody go to therapy and get worse somehow#i cannot fw people who have low self esteem anymore but like i sympathize from a distance lol#hello from the other side of the interaction... self love/worth is hard but please try#ur mischaracterization of ppl based on assumptions is hurting them and it will alienate ppl n push them away#and then become a sort of self fulfilling prophecy.. but also take what I'm saying w a grain of salt 🤷🏾♀️#i just have my personal experiences
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