#I’m such a nerd bro but you know what?! it doesn’t matter

[lunarcigar]

I love monsters, I need more monster content

[alphajocklover]

Hey- I'm one of the presidents of our university's honor fraternity. And its great, don't get me wrong or anything. But we're essentially just a group of skinny white nerds and calling us a "fraternity" is a bit of a stretch. I was hoping to try and use your app to give some of the members a real "frat" experience, especially since its summer now. I thought I'd just test it on me and the other members of our frat's leadership, just to make sure its safe. But I'm having a hard time setting reversal parameters and I'm unable to stop this stupid countdown. Any help please?

You know, for a self proclaimed nerd, you really didn’t do a lot of research. I know that InstaJock is mysterious and not very well known, but what I mentioned in my previous posts should have been enough for you to figure out a few of the issues with your idea. Just to clarify though, let’s go down the list of issues

InstaJock can only be used on one person at a time: the person currently using the phone to set up a profile. The only person you’re about to turn into a Jock is yourself, though I imagine the rest of your frat leaders will get the app too, after you send it to them.

InstaJock is not ‘my app.’ I report on it, and I know a lot more about it than most people, but I didn’t make it. I’m not sure anyone knows who did. If you’re looking for inside information about the app, you’re out of luck.

Reversal Parameters. The app doesn’t have those.

Yes you read that last one correctly. One of the first things most people learn about InstaJock is that it’s irreversible. Sure you can change something about yourself after the fact using the settings, but you can never go back to being the nerd you were. I don’t know where you got your information about this app, but I think someone has been trying to trick you into turning yourself into a jock. I can almost prove it too. See, another basic rule of the app is that InstaJock is, well, instant. There is no flash or growth spurt on anything. One moment you’re a nerd, the next you’re a dumb muscular jock. There shouldn’t be a countdown. Not unless… someone added it to your phone for a specific reason.

Someone wants to watch you squirm, watch you panic as you realize there’s no hope and that you’re definitely going to turn into a dumb jock, and probably drag your entire frat along with you. It might be another person in your frat who thought the app was just a joke and never expected you to find a real version of it, or a jock who wanted to take you and your frat down a peg and turn you guys into proper frat bros. But whoever it is, they’ve got you good. I’m sorry but there isn’t any way out of this. If you’re lucky you might be able to alter the settings a bit, but I imagine whoever did this to you already thought of that. As soon as that countdown ends, you’ll be a jock.

I am really confused as to who did this to you though. For it to be one person, that person would have to be a jock who had access to InstaJock and could invite you, but also would have to be smart enough to plan this all out and close enough to you to gain access to your phone. That could only be a few people. Maybe one of the mysterious app developers knows you personally?

I guess it doesn’t really matter to you now. Hope you enjoy being a beer drinking, muscle flexing, popular and sexy frat bro. I hope the rest of your frat likes it too.

[fictarian]

Hobie w/ an equally as punk reader? <3 🤘🎸

𝐇𝐢𝐦 <𝟑 . ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ 𝐏𝐭. 𝟔

ღ Of course! I apologize if there are issues with this fic, because i’m not very familiar with the style despite trying to learn about it 😭 Fun facts and criticism is VERY MUCH appreciated in the comments, so don’t be afraid to comment

ღ Gang we’re like 21 followers away from 100… i’m shivering in boots ‼️‼️ Tysm for following me omg

ღ Here’s a couple headcannons for if Hobie was with a punk partner (relationship goals, shout out to all my punk lovers I aspire to be like you)

ღ Paring: Hobie Brown and a GN! Punk reader 🙏

ღ Previous part can be found here !

• Whenever the two of you go out together, you always make an effort to go to your local record store. It has become a tradition between you and Hobie to buy two records (preferably of a song that the other hasn’t listened to or knows about) each and gift them to the other at the end of the trip. This helps broaden your guys’ music taste, introduce each other to a new possible favorite band, and just be a bonding experience all together

“The Skids?” You question while looking down at the album in your hands, intrigued by the vibrant colors on the cover. Hobie only nods his head, looking down at the records you had gotten for him. “Mhm, one of my favorites. You’ll like it luv, I promise.”

• No matter what either of you say, you and Hobie are both history nerds. Especially about punk history. So there’s no doubt that whenever you both are on call or are just relaxing in your room in silence, one of you are bound to start a conversation with a history fact. And for the next couple of hours, you’ll both be ranting and exchanging facts to each other

• Since you guys have practically the same style, you often find yourself taking some of Hobie’s jackets, pins, jewelry, etc. Hobie doesn’t mind, in fact, it gets his heart racing whenever he sees you in something that belonged to him at one point (let’s be fr, he isn’t gonna get shit back). So don’t be surprised when you catch him leaning against the doorway to your room, watching you try on one of his leather jackets or ripped jeans with a small smirk and a blush coating his face 🤭

“Y’know, it’s rude to stare” “I just can’t ‘elp it luv, not when something so pretty is right ‘front of me” Hobie cooed, causing you to blush from the tone of his voice. “Whatever…”

• You’re Hobie’s #1 hype person during the concerts he participates in (he doesn’t like consistency, so obviously he switches it up a lot and plays with different bands). This makes him go absolutely WILD. Just seeing you go full on crazy and vibe to the song he’s playing makes him 🥺. Hobie makes it a requirement for you to go to every one of his gigs, which obviously, you don’t mind at all

• You always get a front row view during his concerts, no questions asked. While you’re jamming away to the song his band is performing, Hobie is staring directly at you (somehow managing to not mess up his playing). And when you notice this and finally meet his gaze, the bastard doesn’t even look the least bit shamed or embarrassed. He even sends you a wink, making you the embarrassed one instead

• Hobie dedicates songs to you. Hell, bro will full on WRITE songs for you. He just loves you so much, and wants to show you that in a form that you both bond over constantly every single day. And when Hobie does dedicate a song to you, he makes it very clear to the audience. This makes you want to stomp on him with your platform boots, but it also makes you want to pull him in by the collar of his shirt and kiss him all over his face

“This one is for my arsekicker, _____. Didn’t tell em I was gonna do this before ‘and, since they would ‘ave done just that.” Hobie announced, meeting your sharp glare with a wink and his usual smug smirk. You shook your head, feeling your face burn as the band started to play.

tag list ! @zalayni @luvstarrstruck @jrrantss @pixqlsin @kairiscorner @k4tsu3 @asmobeuses

[eddiemunson-reader-shame]

Good morning Hawkins in my daily struggle to power through Flight of Icarus despite my problems with it, I present to you:

Eddie Munson x Reader Headcanons - Hellfire Club Edition

Author’s Note: Y’all I am fucking STOKED! I’m finally meeting up with some old buddies this Saturday to play D&D again for the first time in four years! Me and my friends have been trying to find someone to DM for us for a while (my lover doesn’t want to which is totally fair). And I fell in love with Eddie helping Gareth make his new character in Flight of Icarus, and I feel like we have a significant lack of Reader in Hellfire Club headcanons. So, from one D&D nerd to the community, please enjoy these headcanons which is basically just me gushing for five hours about D&D.

For context: Let’s say Hellfire Club meets Fridays in the Drama Room after school hours.

Okay, first and foremost, Eddie plays Advanced Dungeons and Dragons in 1986 like its 2024 fifth edition in Hellfire Club.

Flight of Icarus got one thing right: Eddie doesn’t give a shit about rules half the time. While it’s a great guideline to start off from, I feel like Eddie would be big on homebrewing.

There may be some homebrew campaigns and a good majority of the storyline in the main campaign is improv, but that doesn’t stop him from respecting if there are players who want to follow the game rules.

He will tease the shit out of a rules lawyer though.

I can see Mike Wheeler as the rules lawyer at first, only to be thoroughly humbled by the first homebrew one shot Eddie put him in.

Eddie will either help you make a character in private or with the boys in case you need more brains to help explain things to you.

If you’re really new, he has his own private session 0 with you to roll for stats. He will meticulously go through all of your character’s details with you and help explain things no matter how many times you ask. He’s very patient, and he loves when you ask him questions.

It makes him feel happy you care so much about his hobbies!

Another big one: Eddie allows multi classing. You wanna be a Cleric who was torn from their order and forced into a life of crime as a Rogue?

“Bitchin’. We love a sassy holy member of the clergy that’s reverted to a life of crime. Let’s decide together how many levels you want in each class.”

You want to go for a specific subclass that cancels out your main class? *cough DRUID cough*

“Fuck it babe. I’ll allow you to keep your armor proficiencies, your spells, AND I’ll lift the requirements for castle worship only. Your Druid can pray for cleric spells in the woods.”

Hellfire Club is literally so relaxing even though there are insults thrown every five minutes and you might find yourself making enemies for the few hours Hellfire Club meets. But it’s not serious. It’s all in good fun and everyone makes up after.

Eddie often uses the Rule of Cool: If you make it sound cool, he’ll allow it in a campaign.

HOWEVER…

Eddie Munson is your sweetheart, your love of your life, your one, but he is a fucking BASTARD of a DM sometimes.

If you get a high roll, he will throw all manner of shit at you in a campaign.

You have a tanky build? Try soloing five groups in a row with no healer bitch.

Spellcaster with a high level arsenal of spells? Your long rests to regain spell slots will never know peace.

Cleric with high level healing spells? Woe, Silence be upon thee.

This mother fucker will not go easy on you if you’re a first timer, but thankfully he will explain to you in detail what he’s doing, what he’s rolling for, etc.

But that’s only for your first game and only because you’re his baby.

If you have a solid idea of how to play, good luck bro. You’re gonna need it.

You, Jeff and Frank collectively (jokingly) plan to one day jump Eddie after school if he continues his traditions of thinking of sadistic ways to kill your first character for a new class.

You tried to warn the freshmen about Eddie’s bullshit but they didn’t believe you. Especially Dustin, who defended Eddie to the death and chastised you for calling Eddie a “shit licking whore” of a DM because hey, that’s your boyfriend! Be nice to him!

… Dustin now only refers to the DM’s commentaries as “And now a word from our Shit Licking Whore…”

I can see Eddie becoming one of those DMs whose goal is to fucking win at all costs even though it’s really not the point but… you know. He seems like he’d have a competitive streak.

Based on Experience: You make eight in Hellfire Club. For a normal campaign that’s way too many goddamn people and turns can take fucking forever. Eddie often gets impatient and hates when the campaigns get mind numbing.

So Eddie’s devised this solution: One Shots have to be rolled for with a d20 to determine who gets to be one of four players, winners need the highest scores of the group. Hellfire Club’s main campaign though is anything goes, Eddie alone DMs, and all Hellfire Club members can play. Because the main is anything goes, it’s also the hardest. And once your character is dead, there’s no revives. The main campaign is not the most newbie friendly. You can opt out of it if you don’t feel comfortable with the main campaign.

The one shots are mainly official campaigns from the sourcebooks, but there are some homebrew ones allowed as long as Eddie checks them over first. These ones are the easier games to get into.

Eddie will allow anyone who wants to DM a chance to DM these one shots, because he honestly gets sick of being the forever DM and actually wants to play sometimes.

You prefer Eddie as a player because he will strategize beforehand with everyone while he rolls up a character. He will base his decision on everyone else’s, fulfilling any role you need. He also will help explain to you about certain encounters or walk you through picking spells or such as you level up.

If you need help while Eddie DMs, the best people to sit with are Gareth, Jeff, and Mike. Gareth and Jeff have the most knowledge about how spells work and helping you to walk through what would benefit the party. Mike is an invaluable tool to have being a former DM, and while he may get annoyed if you ask too many questions, he can tell you just about anything regarding abilities, monsters, or what effects certain spells have. He’ll also help you pick a weapon proficiency that matches your character’s needs.

If you need cheering up, sit next to Dustin or Frank. Franks got the depression snacks in clutch and Dustin will try to cheer you up if your character dies in a famous Eddie Munson death scene.

Dice Jail for Bad And Naughty Traitor Dice get thrown in a mason jar by Eddie’s DM screen. He shakes the jar full of the shitty dice and you all have to scream “SHUN THE TRAITORS”.

Eddie keeps his dice in a Crown Royal drawstring bag. I said what I said.

He even buys a bottle of Crown Royal for you so you have a matching bag for your dice too.

You best believe anything you need to start off the campaign, Eddie is going to buy it for you.

I will only say this once: Session 0 is the best day ever in Hellfire Club. Eddie goes all out: Pizza, drinks, snacks, candy, music, a little bit of the devil’s lettuce, he goes all fucking out.

[cricketnationrise]

Shitty and Jack, 4:15 PM, Jack's room in the Haus

MY BOYS (sobs in hockey bro friendship) thank you thank you thank you for this prompt - i loved the excuse to write for them for the first time in a while! 💜🦗

want your own ficlet? TWO DAYS LEFT rules here.

🏒🏒🏒🏒

jack's room, 4:15pm

When Jack frowns his forehead goes all scrunchy and Shitty has a hard time not reaching out and smoothing the lines out like a human iron. Jack has a lot of frowns, from Frown #1: Get Your Shit Together On The Ice I Swear To Gretzky to Frown #46: I Do Not Understand That Reference And I’m Not Sure I Want To and everything in between and beyond. He’s currently wearing Frown #34: That’s Not OSHA Compliant. 

It’s fucking adorable. What a goober.

“Seriously, Shitty, that can’t be safe,” Jack says, all earnest concern. 

“Jack. Jackabelle. Jackabaloo,” Shitty says, throwing an arm over his shoulder. “Let me paint you word picture, okay? After classes and practice, you and me, snacks, a drink if we feel like, out on the roof, surveying our new domain. You could even study like the giant fucking nerd that you are. We’d be kings of all the light touches, et cetera. You feel me? Plus, generations of SMH team members have been out on the Reading Room before us, and many will after us. It’s tradition.”

Jack crosses his arms. “The fact that so many people have been out there only worries me more, honestly.”

“It looks fine to me,” Shitty shrugs. “And Johnson says it’s structurally sound.”

Jack snorts. “Oh well if Johnson says it’s safe—”

“His dad’s an engineer or something. He checks the Haus over every summer.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh, now get that big beautiful but of yours in gear and help me get it set up.”

Frown #12: I Think I Missed A Pertinent Segue

“Set up?”

“Chairs, lights, cooler, blankets, tarp – for a start. We’re gonna trick this place out.”

Jack sighs, frowning down at the pile of gear Shitty gathered earlier. (Frown #19: I’m Thinking So Hard It Hurts Sometimes.) “You’re going to keep badgering me about this until I say yes, aren’t you.” 

It’s not a question.

Shitty beams at the hint of acquiescence in his tone. “You know it brah! It wouldn’t be the same without you out there with me. What kind of a kickass hang out spot could it be without my kickass best friend?”

Jack freezes in shock. It breaks Shitty’s heart how Jack still doesn’t think of himself as important to other people sometimes.

“We should get this ready before dark, then, eh?”

And that— That’s not a frown. That’s a fucking smile. 

Jack has fewer smiles than frowns, but the number of smiles that he lets Shitty (and sometimes the team) see are slowly but steadily increasing. Smile #1: Gooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaal, but it doesn’t matter if Jack is the one to score it or not.

This one is Smile #4: Shitty Called Me His Best Friend – unsurprisingly, it’s Shitty’s favorite.

[cadmusfly]

napoleon and lannes for the ship ask game? :)

Three Questions For Ships

Ship It

(1.) What made you ship it?

Reading about Lannes going “come on buddy I’m your best friend you can’t do this shit to me” to Napoleon multiple times, Napoleon going “he didn’t even talk about his wife and kids when he was dying, he was all about me! And also he was very tiny when i met him and I made him who he is don’t question it”

Also my predilection for military hierarchy ships from appreciating Age of Sail fandoms because Commander/Second in Command is such a tasty, tasty dynamic

I don’t see it as based in historical fact as much as NapJuno - I don’t think any Napoleon slash ship except definitely NapXander can attain that - but I enjoy the fictionalised versions that’s been woven here and in my mind~

(2.) What are your favorite things about the ship?

Lannes is… unlike Junot in NapJuno, Lannes is more confident. He does wheedle and exaggerate in letters and requests to Napoleon, but while Junot is all like “I need you”, Lannes is all “You need me”.

I see NapLannes as very bro-y, two guys hitting each other with wooden chairs, remember when we were boys and having fun? We’ll have some fun in the middle of the night but it doesn’t really matter, it’s just a fling, we don’t actually have feelings for each other and we’re not going to talk about it, shut up and kiss me you nerd

And it gets heartbreaking later on as Lannes emotionally matures, as he becomes disillusioned with war and becomes more self aware in a melancholy way, but he knows that he’s incapable of not following Napoleon - oh, he’ll call Napoleon out, he’ll disagree with him, but he can’t leave him and he can’t mutiny or break away because that’s not who he is, not anymore

It’s fundamentally a tragedy, but most of these ships here are tragedy.

Also I kinda like the idea of loyal hound motifs for Lannes - he’s not strictly metaphorically a hound, he’ll snap at his master, but those teeth are just for show in that case.

(3.) Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

Same caveats with NapJuno in that this is a tiny community, but, hmm… don’t think this is unpopular per se, but about ships, I don’t think in another context where same sex relationships are praised or institutional or anything, I don’t think NapLannes would ever be official. They’re not the type to get married or monogamously promise themselves to each other or even acknowledge that what they have is romantic/shippy.

They’re just here to fuck around, even as the chips are on the table and there’s less fucking around to be seen and they both become legends and it’s less fucking and more wistfully dreaming of the days when you could fuck around.

Thanks for the ask!

[wolfxplush]

bro bro bro i know it’s weird but can u write how u think lovette and harin would interact plz 😭 im so curious

ITS NEVER WEIRD!!! I adore these types of asks PLEASE SEND ME MORE!!😭😭

Anyway here you go!!

Harin and Lovette Headcanons!

First meeting!

•Lovette is a woman of pride and confidence. She seeks out the best in herself and will use anyone to get to where she wants to be. That being said- she’s a huge shy baby.

•Lovette struggles to grasp the idea of friendship. At a young age her friends didn’t last long or were quickly disproved by her mother. Leaving her alone most of her life. After the divorce between her parents, Lovette figured being alone was best. This changed once she came to Bullworth. (Against her will-) but she eventually found company she enjoys.

•That being said- Harin…confused her!

•Lovette prides herself in reading into people and how they act or what there like especially the greasers. Grease monkeys who are tough as nails when they want to be. Something a nerd wouldn’t wanna mess with that’s for sure. So when Lovette finally meets Harin, she’s at a loss.

•I imagine they met when Lovette was visiting the greasers to drop off their latest purchase from her. Probably some cigarettes or stolen booze she got from Mr. Galloway.

•awkward greetings, Johnny introduces the two. Seriously it’s so quiet you can hear a pen drop.

•Harin shakes her hand with grease on them and too much force it makes Lovette cringe. Will have to wash her hand after this and is NOT happy about it.

•Quickly leaves after that.

———————-

Friendship!

•Once they warm up to eachother and their quirks I have a feeling they are good friends!

•Let’s Harin raid the teacher lounge for the good snacks every once and awhile.

•Harin does Lovette hair into silly styles. Lovette thinks it’s cute but complains the whole time.

•Harin backs up Lovette if she’s on duty and scolding another student. Lovette is very capable of handling herself but appreciates it

•Harin DRAGS Lovette to the carnival. Lovette absolutely hates that place and complains about cerfew and how the food is worse than Edna’s cooking.

•Harin attempts to impress Lovette and win her a prize at the toss a ball both. Says. “This one’s for you!” And completely misses. Lovettes ends up winning one for the instead!

•convinces Lovette to have a sleepover sometimes. Only on very rare occasions, like you have to beg Lovette to go😭.

•Lovette read a 80s magazine about sleepovers before she attended because this would be her first one. “….So…wanna talk about..-“ glances at her hand. “Hot…boys?”

•Lovette lets her get away with much more than others. If someone is watching she will pretend to restrain her.

•Visit the movies a lot. Like seriously the both love the movies??? Any movie it doesn’t matter. They are THERE!!!

————————

ENJOY!! These were fun!! If you want your oc headcanons for interacting with mine send me an ask!!!!!❤️ I wrote these not sober so I’m sorry if the seem weird

[tyrantisterror]

I want to talk about Harley Quinn for a bit, unprompted by anything, because fuck you it’s my blog I do what I want.

Because I’m a nerd who thinks too much about stories I like to sort the stages of my life by the heroes that defined them.  Godzilla was the hero of my childhood, a big dinosaur who taught a bullied kid me that you have a right to dig in your feet and assert who you are even when the world is against you for it.  Spider-Man was the hero of my teens, helping me cope with learned just how chaotic the adult world I was preparing to enter is and survive the rocky road to growing up.  Sherlock Holmes was the hero of my college years, a person who found what he wanted to do in life and devoted himself entirely to it, which is what I tried to do in turn.

Harley Quinn is the hero of my current stage.  I know most people would find that weird since she’s, like, a supervillain most of the time, and at best a very amoral anti-hero, but I mean it entirely sincerely.  And she’s the hero of my current age in part because she’s defined so much by her failures.

In almost every incarnation, Harley’s backstory begins with her going to college and pursuing a career that will bring her material success and prestige, as so many people in my generation were told to do.  She does as instructed and gets that career, only to immediately be shown the grim reality of what she signed up for, and getting broken by the stress that comes with the job almost immediately.  Saying she became a supervillain is actually generous because Harley really becomes a supervillain’s henchman, completely subservient to and exploited by a character who’s basically a personification of the corruption that made her dream job a living hell.

As a villain/henchman, Harley’s fun but a bit limited.  She exists to provide comic relief - both by being a goofier, lighter sort of evil compared to the other, more dangerous villains, and by being just debauched enough herself that we can laugh when she fails and gets knocked on her ass.  She’s a punching bag for the narrative, a joke to be laughed at and only occasionally pitied (but never enough to keep us from rooting for her to lose).

It’s important to note here that Harley was initially created for Batman the Animated Series, which is specifically a version of the Batman story where redemption doesn’t happen.  There have been papers written on this, even.  Because B:TAS was a serialized story designed to go on as long as the executives at Warner Bros thought it was making money, its villains had to stay villains, because if they ever changed from that they’d no longer serve their narrative purpose.  There are countless episodes where various villains try to turn over a new leaf (including one for Harley), but they always end with the villain in question backsliding into villainy.  As one critic pointed out, it’s kind of Calvinist that way: you’re either good or bad from creation, and no matter what you try to do you can’t change that, no matter how much you might want to be good.  A B:TAS villain has no choice but to be a villain till the story ends, and the story is never meant to end.

Comic books are also serialized and meant to be endless, so in this way B:TAS is pretty true to the source material.  However, because of just how long comics have gone on, sometimes writers are given permission to shake things up and change the status quo for a bit, to keep people engaged.  And while these changes are generally dialed back (there’s countless jokes about how rarely even death sticks in comics), occasionally they prove popular enough to become the new status quo.  It’s not common, but it has happened.

And this is where Harley goes from fun to inspiring - because Harley made a new status quo.

Being incredibly popular, Harley Quinn eventually got her own comic book series, which is a pretty big deal for a glorified henchman.  And because it was her comic series, the writers had to figure out who Harley was without the presence of Batman or the Joker, the characters who had defined her up to this point.  They looked at Harley’s personality and backstory and tried to figure out what Harley would do on her own.

And the result was something really interesting.  She stopped being a henchman, and ultimately proved too good-natured to be a villain, yet a bit too chaotic  and counter-culture to be a traditional hero, while also being too plucky and sweet to resemble most comic book anti-heroes.  Her background as a psychologist became more prominent as people realized that a comic book world actually kind of desperately needs some good psychologists around, and her wildcard status made her bounce off of other characters, both villains and heroes, in interesting ways few other characters could do.

It was fun and interesting and popular, so it stuck.  Harley, who was born in one of the most rigidly static versions of the Batman mythos, where villains stay villains and heroes stay heroes, broke the status quo and remade it.  Harley, who was originally defined by her failure and victimization, made a whole new role for herself, and found success despite it all.  The punching bag became so beloved that the rules of the universe bent for her, and what once was the sum of her character became just an added wrinkle of backstory to creating the trickster that comics fans love.

Harley went to college, got her dream career, promptly got her ass kicked by said career when it turned out to suck ass, and spent a decade or so going through hell before finally discovering who she really wanted to be, and then became that person to the love and support of all.  That’s why Harley Quinn is inspiring, and that’s why she’s my hero.

[casperrscapes]

haikyuu x hogwarts crossover fanfic rec list !!

hello!! i really like haikyuu, and i quite like harry potter, so it makes sense that i like haikyuu x hogwarts fics, doesn’t it? here are some of my favourites ones that i’ve come across!! (o゜▽゜)o☆

be careful, and check tags/warnings before reading!! 

this isn’t in any particular order. 

(i used the little moon phases to represent .5/.25/.75 of a star ( •̀ ω •́ )✧)

⭐⭐⭐⭐ Sixth Time's the Charm by tsumekakusu (T) 2,068 words [kyouhaba] --- (aka How to say "I like you" in six different ways)

kyoutani is such a nerd, and we love him for that. oh, right, yahaba’s also a bit stupid at times... he’s very dense. they get together in the end though, so that’s what matters!!

⭐⭐⭐⭐ Love from the Quidditch Bleachers by sunablinks (NR) 5,271 words [sunaosa, bkg sakuatsu] --- In a wizarding world where everything fell into place because Suna Rintarou just wanted to know why everyone hated the Miya twins so much. “Wanna sneak into the pantry later and grab food for a picnic at the Quidditch field tonight?”

this might actually be the first and only sunaosa fic i’ve ever read?? not cause i don’t like ‘em!! and honestly, i might read some more of these after how cute this one was... but anyways, this is such an endearing fic, and they’re so in love, and i just love this!! suna taking care of osamu is really cute :).

⭐⭐⭐🌖 stardust by InkCaviness (G) 1,415 words [kyouhaba] ---  Shigeru first meets Kyoutani during their Herbology class and he watches in fascination as the Hufflepuff with the permanent scowl and broad shoulders carefully handles delicate plants.

it’s very nice, fluffy fluff, what else can i say?? 

⭐⭐⭐🌖 Magicked by HoneyBeeez (T) 8,470 words [kyouhaba] check tags for this one!! --- Yahaba loves all things medicine, so he's basically a kid in a candy store when he's allowed to be an assistant at the Hospital Wing. He loves what he learns, what he does... the only thing that's a little troublesome is the patients, and even then, its only one patient: Kyoutani Kentarou.

oddly humorous?? also quite sad though... the ending fit kyouhaba so well!!

⭐⭐⭐🌘 Blood by darkbluebox (T) 20,215 words, 10/10 chapters [tsukiyama] ---  Words like "Muggle-born" and "Pure-blood" don't mean a lot when you're still a child, but everyone has to grow up sooner or later.

adjdakjdwka, why do tsukiyama work so well for hogwarts au angst??? this hurt me,,,, but also, why are they so dumb?? like come on!! 

⭐⭐⭐🌗 Show A Little Faith by minijhi (G) 13,872 words, 3/3 chapters [kuroken] --- “Why are you sending me a singing Valentine telegram?" Kenma asks, mouth flattened. "It’s six months until Valentine’s Day.” “I bought a dwarf over the summer to use as cupid.” Kuroo says. “I figured he could use some practice.” - Presenting Kenma as the Boy-Who-Lived, whose living becomes a lot more interesting when Ravenclaw Prince Kuroo Tetsurou starts sending him singing telegrams about defeating the Dark Lord.

kenma as the boy who lived is so jdakdjkad?? idk what to say. also, kuroo sending him valentines (not really valentines, but still) is so funny. 

⭐⭐⭐ The Love Potion Of The Century by mago_teung (M) 170,383 words, 45/45 chapters [daisuga, bokuaka, kagehina, tsukiyama, asanoya, iwaoi, kuroken, ushiten] check tags for this one!! ---  "Wait, give me a sec. I have 7 brain cells left." "I bet you 5 galleons professor Takeda and professor Ukai are smashing each other, right now as we speak." "That Akaashi-san doesn't seem like a Ravenclaw at all. I was so sure he was in Slytherin." "Wait, Sugawara is in Slytherin? ... I've been calling him Hufflepuff trash this whole time." "Guys, I just saw that Slytherin kid Tsukishima and the Hufflepuff Yamaguchi making out at Three Bro-hey, stop laughing! I'm serious!" "You think if I turn into an owl I won't have to do the exams?" "That bitch Oikawa got another love letter. Thinks he's the shit..." "Why are you crying? Stop it." "With how often Kuroo goes to the Ravenclaw tower, you would think he was one of them. Kinda sad though, he's stupid." "I'm telling my daddy about this! ... No, that's my father. I'm pretty sure I said daddy." 

this one is certainly odd!! it’s technically part one of a series, but i’ve only read this first one (and the last oneshot/spinoff/oneoff). it’s very... chaotic?? definitely not everyones cup of tea, and in hindsight, i can’t say i loved it that much. i definitely enjoyed it a lot more in the moment. the whole concept is completely stupid (literally everything happends because of a love potion), but if chaos is your thing, you might like this one!!

⭐⭐⭐⭐ Oh My! (You didn't know?) by mago_teung (T) 13,977 words [aofuta] --- "I like you! Get it through your thick skull!" ". . . okay?"

spinoff i mentioned above!! honestly, i like this one better than the main fic, haha. it’s very funny and sweet!! 

⭐⭐⭐⭐ Burning Deep, Burning Bright by jellyryans (ryankellycc), ryankellycc (NR) 28,031 words, 4 works [asanoya, kagehina, daisuga] might want to check tags?

this series is absolutely amazing. asanoya focused, but there’s a kagehina and a daisuga fic too!! it’s such a fun twist of the whole asahi and nishinoya fight that happened early on in haikyuu!! it’s so cool to see it in a harry potter au... not really a hogwarts au though, just a harry potter au in general. 

⭐⭐⭐🌗 As Well As You Know Me by Authoress (E) 8,542 words [daisuga, bkg hinayama, kuroyaku] very smutty, check tags!! --- There's nothing like a Gryffindor v. Slytherin match to get the blood pumping. Well, that is, except angry post-game sex, but Suga's a prefect, he would never instigate something like that, right?

umm... i don’t really like smut?? like, i don’t read a lot of it?? so i can’t say whether or not this is “good smut.” but, i like hogwarts aus!! and i loved the whole bit about house loyalty/pride, it was funny, and made a lot of sense considering actual lore of hogwarts!! 

⭐⭐⭐🌖 woo you by bishounen_curious (G) 755 words [daisuga] ---  Suga snickered. “You really have no idea why I’ve been practically stalking you for a week?”

suga has the confidince i’ll never have, i can only dream... and daichi’s oblivousness to why suga’s been “harrassing,” him is so funny,,, this is really just such a funny fic!! 

⭐⭐⭐⭐ Spellbound by orphan_account (T) 6,847 words [daisuga, bkg kuroken, iwaoi] --- Out of all the people Daichi had to fall for, it had to be a Slytherin. Their two houses were supposed to hate each other. To be fair, he was nothing like the stereotypes preached. He wasn’t snide, slimy or pompous. He was beautiful in an ethereal kind of way. He was almost ghostly pale, all innocent brown eyes and silvery-blonde hair. Sugawara Koushi, the boy who was even sweeter than his name suggested.

daichi being done with his underclassmen is so funny, i can’t!! this fic is definitely really funny, but it’s also just extremely sweet?? huge rec from me!! 

⭐⭐⭐⭐🌗 quidditch gloves, parchment, and custard cream by h_lovely (T) 12,450 words [matsuhana] ---  After class, Matsukawa finds Hanamaki in the tall cushy grass by the lake.

hajdkasdjakd, matsuhana > everything !! i love them so much gahhhh!! look at them!! look!!! and a freaking matsuhana hogwarts au??? ‘course i’m going to love it!!

⭐⭐⭐⭐🌗 snowflakes by arsenicjay (T) 3,622 words [bokuaka] --- Bokuto is a simple wizard with simple needs; a nice date, a little romance, and he's all good to go. Or, Akaashi and Bokuto spend a day in Hogsmeade just before Christmas.

they’re so ahdjakdj??? skrunkly?? little blorbos?? i love this sort of fluff,,, the cultural differences/references were really fun too!! 

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ don’t let this magic die by canvases (oilpaints) (G) 8,498 words [semishira] --- Shirabu and Semi don’t really get along. By some twist of fate, they wind up sharing a room at the Leaky Cauldron after running away from their respective homes. Both plan on cutting ties as soon as they return to Hogwarts, but cramped rooms have a way of getting even the coldest of people to open up, often in the most unexpected and magical of ways.

i love semishira with, like, my whole heart, and this was so good!! their development- and their banter is written so well!! it’s so funny!! and their dynamic?! chefs kiss. i love this fic so much :’). (if you couldn’t tell by the rating i gave this fic, i have huge bias towards semishira)

⭐⭐⭐⭐ Haikyuu at Hogwarts by Killthespare (T) 622,936 words, 5 works, ongoing [daisuga, asanoya, ushiten, kiyoyachi, yakulev, akisae, bokuaka, shoumika, amanai/ennoshita] ---  Pretty much as the title suggests: a Hogwarts!AU with Haikyuu. It's planned for 7 book series so definitely a longer series. This first few can be read out of order with only minor confusion (about as easily as the first few Harry Potter books can) but there is an overall series plot in addition to the individual plots of each story. As of the fourth book, the previous third story should really be read before the fourth or later books.

i really like this series!! the characters are all really well handled!! it unfortunately hasn’t been updated in a little while, but the author says that they’ll be updating dec.18-19, so now would be a great time to get yourself caught up on the series in prepreation for the next chapter!! i will say, the current book is bound to get interesting... 

⭐⭐⭐🌘 in which tsukishima and yamaguchi win ten points for slytherin by deanpendragon (T) 3,990 words [tsukiyama]

very crack-y i’d say. i think what i originally said when i bookmarked this fic sums up my feelings about it quite well: “eeeeeeeee!!???”

(if you couldn’t tell, i really like short, fluff-and-no-plot sort of fics.)

this is shorter than i’d thought it’d be,,, i’ll probably end up continuing this post as i read more haikyuu hogwarts aus, but here are my recs for now!! 

[m1ckeyb3rry]

Ok cue my memory loss moment part 5 I can’t tell if I sent this reply in or not before so if this is a dupe I SINCERELY APOLOGIZE hsvshshs but anyways

OMG EVERYONE CHEER!!! Guys the moment is finally upon us…another mira banger about to drop….

LMAOO fwtkac was the gateway…once you start you can’t stop its just how the Karasu rabbit hole works! Bro hollyhock is actually so good…I can’t even put it into words properly but just the whole setting giving a new depth to a diff side of otoyas characters ugh so good

True!!! I’m ngl I’m a little surprised that for marketing sake they didn’t try to throw in some like popular character bait…maybe it’s because most of the actually popular bllkers are already out and as opposed to merch I guess book sales would be a bit diff? Like fans would buy to read even if their absolute faves aren’t in but yeah…the stories were fire though LMAO new appreciation for Barou fr

And IM ON IT o7 very happy to serve the miraverse and honestly it’s good for me too because if I wanna reference something quickly I can just go command f it or if I wanna read something fast I can just read my tl LMAO I also just like having my own TL/interpretations written down just for my reference too…which is part of the reason why I also ended up TLing Hioris too even though there was a TL already out! I remember reading the TLd version that got posted and some wording kinda threw me off so I was like let me just look at this myself…LOL Also I’m kinda a lore nerd so I wanna make sure I get to see any intricacies or in between the line messages that can get lost in translation! So yeah TLDR I will most definitely be here for tabieita LNs!!!

IM CRYING they’re gonna have to scroll through our manifestations and convos just to get to the chapter like imagine the link gets passed around and the first thing people read is us screaming about mariokart in yuki’s novel or anri getting done dirty (I clicked on the links just to see what they’d have to go through and oh my god chapter 2 LMFAOOO there’s like a whole minute of scrolling worth of convo before you even reach the LN part it’s so funny)

We’re truly just built different sorry this is exclusive content gatekept by the insanely long convos we have

-Karasu anon

HAHAH this time you did in fact send this in already 😭 but it’s okay i will delete the copy!! but no worries 😋

FINISHED ROUND ONE OF PROOFREADING!! heading to monaco for my mother’s birthday dinner soon hehe but once i’m back tn i will get on round two and hopefully i’ll be able to post it by tmrw!! lowkey idk how i feel about it but at least it’ll be out in the world after i’ve been talking abt it sm 😭

you came to my inbox and showed me the ways of karasuism and i’ve never looked back since 🙏🏻 jkjk but fr though i love writing him sm now he’s so good at the one sided pining thing which i loveee in a male lead 🤩 like YESSS be absolutely sick over this girl who doesn’t even know she likes you yet YESSS 🤤💖

hollyhock otoya is so fun i love him and i cannot WAIT to write more of him and y/n…idk if you’ve heard that one tik tok sound that’s like “you belong with me” from taylor swift and then it transitions into “you belong to me” from house of balloons / glass table girls from the weeknd but that’s literally hollyhock y/n + karasu’s dynamic vs her dynamic with otoya 😭😭😭 like with karasu it’s all sweet innocent besties (they are platonic soulmates coded eventually like they end up loving each other SOO MUCH but not romantically??) vs with otoya she’s literally like “i want you to belong to me” (exact quote from chapter 2: “you wanted this ninja to belong to you”) FHDKSJSJ man atp free otoya 😰🙏🏻 but he matches y/n’s freak so well he probably doesn’t even WANT to be freed

i feel like the people who would buy light novels would buy them no matter what + they probably thought barou would be popular enough to carry it?? who knows…agreed though the stories were all rlly good (well aryu’s was a little goofy but wtvr)

LMAOOO THAT’S WHAT I WAS THINKING people will be like “why are they freaking out over mario kart??” FJSJDJS but ykw if you want to read you have to go through the trials and tribulations of our massive convos 🤩 we are elite though…carrying the bllk fandom with our translations + fics 😋

[greyfix]

Let Me Care For you

Title:  Let Me Care For You

Ship: Kirishima Eijirou/Bakugou Katsuki

Summary: Bakugou doesn’t show up to class, and Kirishima is pretty worried. What could have happened? 

Word Count: 1.1k 

Requested By: n/a

Warnings/Tags: dAuthor’s Note: this is purely self indulgent and probably has no real plot

ao3

Bakugou woke up feeling miserable. His head was throbbing, he couldn’t breathe through his nose, and he was unbearably hot. He groaned and turned over. The last thing he needed was to miss class, but the hell he was gonna let those extras see him like this. He’d have to stay in his room. 

So, he turned off his contingency alarms, made sure his door was locked, and went back to sleep. 

***

Kirishima only began to worry when Bakugou didn’t walk into class seconds before the bell as always. He was always late, but never enough to get pinged for it. As much as he doesn’t want to seem like it, bakugou is a total nerd and doesn’t usually miss class. 

But he didn’t think too much about it, figuring he would just be later than usual. He probably has a reason , he thought.  He just made sure to grab an extra of everything to give to him later. 

However, the farther in the day he got without seeing Bakugou the more worried he was. Now that he thinks harder about it he didn’t even see him in the kitchen that morning. Usually Bakugou eats in the morning, sometimes he’ll even leave something out for the others if he feels like cooking a large quantity. Though there were times that he’d start early and take his food back to his room.  Kirishima could understand that, i mean sometimes you just don’t want to socialize, and that’s cool! 

Apparently by the time lunch came around his worry was starting to show on his face. He was standing in line at Lunch Rush when Kaminari nudged him. “Hey, you okay man? You’re looking a little off,” Kaminari spoke. 

Kirishima was startled but responded regardless, “Yeah bro, i’m cool!” He smiled, but his heart wasn’t in it. He really was worried about Bakugou, but it wouldn’t really make sense to the others. They didn’t know about their relationship. Not on purpose, it just wasn’t something Bakugou talked about often and their dynamic didn’t really change much after. They figured that the group would find out when they find out and it didn’t matter either way. 

Kirishima didn’t want them to find out like this though, he at least wanted Bakugou to be there. He didn’t know what was going on today, but he didn’t want to bombard him with that if something was wrong. Bakugou was a private guy, and Kirishima respected that. 

So he put on a smile and talked with the rest of the squad as they sat down at lunch. Joking about whatever stupid things their classmates did, or how the classload was brutal and that Aizawa must be a sadist to assign this much at once. He pretended that nothing was wrong even when they talked about how bakugou didn’t show up. The others chalked it up to him probably wanting a day off since he’s never been absent on purpose once. 

He continued to collect classwork for Bakugou when it started up again. He felt guilty for thinking about asking Bakugou for an extra tutoring lesson when he saw him again. I really shouldn’t bother him with my problems, since something is obviously wrong on his end. 

It was really easy to zone out when Present Mic wasn’t even speaking Japanese. I really wish he would send a text. I don’t want to bother him by texting him first, he thought. He opened his phone and composed messages and deleted them, and composed messages and deleted them, over and over again until he finally decided he would just go to bakugou’s room when classes got out after he got a chance to change. 

And that’s exactly what he did. He made up some excuse to the others and went off to his room to get out of his uniform and put down his stuff, before heading to Bakugou’s room. 

He knocked on the door a few times before it opened revealing a disheveled Bakugou dressed in nothing but sweats and a tank top. His hair was messier than usual and his nose and eyes were red. Bakugou sniffled, “What do you want-” but then he stopped short when he noticed that it was Eijirou. His expression softened, but not by much. “What are you doing here”

His voice was raspy and tired and really fucking hot. But Eijirou filed that information away for later. “I came to check on you. I was worried when you didn’t show up to school today.” He spoke softly, averting his eyes. He was a little embarrassed. He figured it was a little pathetic that he can’t go a few hours without bothering his boyfriend. 

 “That’s stupid, I’m fucking fine” Katsuki growled but Eijirou knew that he didn’t actually mean it. It made him smile. 

“I picked up your classwork, can I come in?” he asked, still grinning. 

Katsuki wanted to resist, but he knew better. Not only is Eijirou extremely stubborn, but Katsuki actually did want him to come in. But he would never admit to it, so he just grunted and opened the door wide enough to let his giant of a boyfriend inside. 

Eijirou walked into the familiar room and set the schoolwork on the desk before turning to Katsuki. “Are you sick?” He reached out to press the back of his hand to Katsuki’s forehead, but he swiftly dodged the touch. 

“I told you i’m fucking fine eijirou-” he grumbled before stopping to cough. 

Eijirou’s eyebrows furrowed, “Forgive me for not believing you.” He walked over to Katsuki’s minifridge and grabbed a bottle of water and brought it to him. “Will you let me check if you have a fever now?”

“I don’t have a fever.”

“And I have tits as big as yours”

Katsuki just rolled his eyes, and let Eijirou touch his forehead. 

“You totally have a fever,” Eijirou said. “Have you eaten today?”

Katsuki’s eyes narrowed. “Why.”

Eijirou sighed, “Because it’s important to eat and drink a lot when you’re sick, so that you can heal up fast. Have you taken any medicine?”

“Eijirou i can manage myself dammit.”

“Let me take care of things for once, alright?" Eijirou spoke and Katsuki softened. “You’re always taking care of me and the others, as aggressive as you are about it, let me take care of you this time.”

Katsuki huffed, “I ate once around lunch time, and no i haven’t taken any medicine. I didn’t have any and wasn’t about to go looking.”

Eijirou’s expression morphed into something Katsuki thought to be a combination of happiness at being ‘allowed’ to help, and sympathy. He leaned in for a kiss, but Katsuki dodged his touch once again. 

“I might be fucking contagious, dumbass.”

Eijirou just laughed and kissed him anyway. 

[praphit]

Scream 6: Happy Women’s History Month!

Let me start off by saying that I am not a fan of this franchise. I like the first one, the second one is ok, but the rest?? - meh. I just can't go with it, you know?? I tried. There are always too many times when I say "Wait, what?" And yet, the "Fast & Furious" franchise; I'm 100% bought.

I know that makes no sense.

Maybe it's because I'm a child of Jason Voorhees. 

I hold all slashers to his standards of art, comedy, and excellence:)

Meanwhile, 

Ghostface is clumsy, kinda stupid, chatty, sloppy, reckless, and always has a partner. Teamwork is for heroes, villains are supposed to be able to do it all by themselves.

So, why did I watch this? - Women's History Month. Yep. A friend of mine (a woman) asked me to go with her to see it. Normally, I would have told this friend to kick rocks, but I figured since we're honoring women this month... that it's the least I can do :) Just trying to do my part.

If you're not caught up with this franchise, it doesn't matter. We all know the basics, and the basics still apply. It's a rated R Scooby Doo (Who dun done it?! Let’s take off their mask and see). Kinda like the show "Velma", 

but with better writing.

  Idk how many ghostface's we're up too now (that's another thing about him - he/she always dies, but somehow the masks are still getting manufactured and some new psychopath picks up where the last one left off), but he's back, and this time he's in NY. And this time, he's not chasing Sidney. 

Sorry, Sid, but apparently he got bored with you, and is now chasing after someone younger. Happy Women's History Month!

The youth I speak of are the same yoots from the last movie:

THE CORE FOUR (they call themselves):

We've got the trauma sisters (what I’m calling them). 

They've been through a lot. People keep getting murdered around them. They're trying to move on, but it's hard when Ghostface keeps tracking them down. Some of you kids out there might think you've got it bad, but at least there's no murderer hunting you down. Imagine your life like this: You try to go to college and get your education on, but here comes Ghostface to your classroom. You try to have a party and get into some sexy-time action with some drunken, shady, stranger, and here comes Ghostface. (side note: Jenna Ortega’s character does this - idk how old she is... 20ish maybe, but she looks like a teenager, so when some guy who looks like he’s in his 30′s tries to take her upstairs, it comes across to me like we have an R.Kelly situation on our hands)

You try to make a TikTok video alone in your room, and here comes Ghostface. You try to get a Big Mac with cheese from Mickey D’s, and you guessed it - Ghostface is there, ready to take your order.

Damn, dude! Either kill them or let them live! You gotta admire these young ladies. Despite the crud that this world keeps throwing their way, they find the strength to keep on keeping on. Happy Women's History Month :)

We also have... I forgot his name... we’ll call him Macho Man. He's the protector of the group, so he thinks. He's a level 10 bro. And no guy is good enough to be around the ladies in his life except for him. Isn't that sweet?? What would we do without our "protectors"?

And then there's the movie nerd.

She's the one who explains all of the movie meta stuff that's going on. One thing I can appreciate about her is that she leans into her nerdiness. But, that appreciation did not stop me from wanting to choke her out every time she talked. It's not completely her fault, cuz this franchise's schtick got old for me in the 3rd installment, but I'm placing all of the blame on her. Seriously, she could not have been more annoying. It was painful for me. I couldn't stop squirming through her monologues. I was gnashing my teeth. I thought I was turning into Ghostface. This movie almost became the crux of my villain origin story.

Look, the kills in this movie were multiplied, as they should be, but honesly, I think Ghostface could have killed MORE... OR this movie needed to be shorter, and cut out all of the emotional gush-gush from The Core Four. I have never rooted so hard for the "heroes" of a story to be killed. I wanted them all to go, including Ghostface. Perhaps I’m remembering it wrong, but weren’t the OG characters of “Scream” likeable? Not all of them, but enough, right?? (or maybe it was just Dewey - idk)

Everybody here is so ughckq... not one likeable character in this movie. I was rooting for something biblical to happen:

God interrupts Movie Nerd's monologue and says "ENOUGH! THIS IS HORRIBLE!" Then, he sends an angel to blow up the town. Everybody is dead. God says "Amen" and they roll the credits, but that's not what happens.

Everyone is so whiny! Not just the kids, but the adults too. Is that just what we are now? Maybe it's true to reality. Are we all whiny? Have my eyes just been opened?

Trauma sisters, I respect your strength, but don't TRY to move on with your lives, DO IT. There are ways! Adele uses grammy award winning music. Batman uses revenge, Chris Rock uses Netflix specials. Do something! Who's that lady? um... The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. She's been through worst shit than y'all, and look at her! She ain't bitchin about it! She’s bout it bout it! She got tough! and carved out a new life for herself. Look at her - 

  she’s living the dream!

Macho Man! AM I supposed to like you? All men know his game! He points out to the lady that he wants (he’s trying to score with Ortega), that the men she's been seeking are toxic (and well over 30). What she really needs is a guy like him. We all know that game! I think... do women know that game? I think they do... idk Happy Women's History Month! While Macho Man is not quite the picture of "toxic masculinity" he's close enough. He's like diet TM.

And don't get me started on Movie Nerd. She sparked this rant in me!

Ghostface! Kill! Kill them all! But, you won't will you?? You'll kill (awesomely) through NY. Bursting on the scene whenever The Core Four try to get some down time, but like every other part of this franchise, you'll never kill the main person/people whom you actually set out to kill.

These four are lucky that I didn't become Ghostface, cuz this movie would have only been about 30mins long, if that! I'd break in to their home, and call them to play a game alerting them to what I'm up to? NO! I'd kill them! I'm not going to let the trauma sisters take up valuable screen time to whine about their problems. I'm not going to allow Macho Man to... well, maybe a lil sexy-time action with the ladies before I kill him... bros before hoes, am I right?? (Happy Women's History Month). And I would definitely end Movie Nerd's reign of Annoyance. 

*WHEW* sorry... that's been building up for a while. It kept me up. Seriously... I'm up early, typing right now, cuz I had this rant in me, and it was keeping me from rest. Now, I can move on. See, trauma sisters, that's how you do it! You move on! You don't take a break while running from the killer to have an emotional pow wow. Now, is NOT the time! You're being hunted! DAG GON YOU! Ghostface, kill them! *WHEW* *clearing throat* sorry again. That's... the last drop, I think.

It wasn't all bad. Like I said, the kills are awesome. More blood in this one than the others, I think. You’ve gotta hand it to Ghostface, the man loves his work. I like his gusto. If he does catch you in this movie, he’s going to stab you like 35 times - that’s solid work ethic. The camera work for these kills is on point. Ghostface ain't playing around with all of the stabbing. You'll feel that shit, and that's why most people are there. I also LOVED the first scene. LOVED! I didn't see that coming at all. But, then... same ol bullshit. And that's the thing, I'm not about this brand of bullshit, but if you are, then it'll be just as enjoyable for you as the others. But, for a casual ( I use that word lightly) fan ------ Grade: D

I wondered to my friend (who's lucky that I love her) if the message over these types of movies are positive for women. I don't have the answer to that question. I mean, these "final girls (women)" are strong, but they've been through a whole lot, and don't seem all that healthy. They're bitter, angry, depressed, tired, lonely in some cases... that's a lot of pain/death they've been around.

Can we do better? Again, I don't know.

What if the woman is the lead antagonist? She hunts down the men for a change... although unless the writers let her win (which would be letting the murderer win) she'll end up being beaten up by a bunch of men... that doesn't look good.

But, what if...

Ok, what if there's some sort of alien entity that takes over the woman, and she becomes empowered. During the day she becomes powerful, independent, successful, glorious, and at night this entity leads her to kill... a lot. No, like A LOT - she's a beast. (look, we've gotta make money off this thing:). She'll only kill men... white men... Republican white men (kidding:)... but definitely white men who love Tucker Carlson. This way when she inevitably is defeated, they won't be killing the woman per se, but the empowered, successful monster that she has beco.... hmmm... Shoot... Maybe this is the best that we can do.

Happy Women's History Month!

[quitesins]

Calling them bro after you start dating

Masterlist

Katsuki | Shouto | Izuku | Eijirou

Tags: SFW, but suggestive, Fem!Reader, Crack? Fluff, Comedy, kinda ooc, Characters are all aged up, Deku’s is a lot more suggestive. The tense on this is all over the place, I’ll fix once I have the brain power to do so

Bakugou Katsuki

Even before you were dating it sort of ticked him off- being called bro by you- so after you start dating, does it drive him MAD!

“Stop that shit.”

You’re too used to his huffy behaviour so you pay it no mind, just rolling your eyes.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me.” He glares, albeit not harshly.

His stare lingers and you find yourself finally caving and asking what’s wrong. “Bro what?”

“That.” He points at you, looking dramatically offended. “Calling me bro? I’m your Boyfriend.”

The realisation that it’s being called ‘bro’ that had Bakugou acting all pouty, has you choking back a laugh.

“Katsuki, bro, is that it?” You sputter through the giggles.

“Oh fuck off [Name].” It isn’t angry sounding and he takes a seat by you, almost cuddling. “What if I started calling you extra, Hah?”

“You used to!” You poke him and he shoots you yet another glare. “‘Fucking extra, go out with me’ if I recall correct.”

Then he’s groaning and turning his head, sporting an evident blush. “I thought we agreed to not talk about that again.”

“What, I said yes didn’t I?” You go to cup his cheeks so he faces you. You then push yourself to his lap, seating yourself comfortably “And here I am, in your arms, 5 years later.” His frown had started to soften, but like the menace you are, you couldn’t help but tease a little more. “Bro.”

This time he rolls his eyes, smitten enough to let you tease. “You’re the fuckin’ worst, ya’ know that?” His words mean nothing with how gentle they leave him.

“I know.” You grin, pecking him on the lips. “But you love me anyways.”

He returns your kisses almost instinctively, then sighs out a soft. “Yeah… I do.”

“But actually stop calling me bro, next time I’ll kick your ass.”

“Kats’!! You’re so mean!!”

Todoroki Shouto

Thinks he’s in the bro zone.

Although he’s not unaware of the feelings of those around him by any means, he can be a little ignorant to nuances of speech, taking things too literally at times. So when you refer to him as bro, oh he assumes the worst.

To be fair it isn’t just on him, you’re just as bad calling your crush bro. What did you expect.

It takes multiple hurdles, an abundance of google searches along the lines of “Does my crush like me back?” or “How to tell if a woman is interested you.” Unbelievably useless advice from resident-playboy Denki, and a more than awkward conversation with his father, for Shouto to actually find himself in a relationship with you.

So when you call him bro even after you start dating, oh god is he even more confused.

“[Name], Do you see me as a brother figure?”

The question is out of the blue and you can only stutter out a “What?”

“You keep calling me bro, even ‘broski’ once.” He prompts.

You hadn’t even noticed that, and it’s a little embarrassing to finally realise; you very much have been calling your crush-now-boyfriend ‘bro’ for years.

“Oh god, it’s just habit.” You insist. “I don’t see you as a brother, no.”

He doesn’t respond immediately, seemingly in thought.

When he does reply though, his words are a little stuttered. “You call- Katsuki and Izuku ‘bro’ too…”

You’re not sure why that matters until it clicks, he wants to be called something special.

“Would you like it if I called you something else, how about love? I think pretty suits you too.”

It’s not often you see Shouto flustered- confused maybe- but hardly bordering shy. Instead he’s one to be blunt and direct, sometimes even shameless. But now he sways, warm in the face, nodding his head and whispering out gently. “Yes. I’d like that.”

Midoriya Izuku

It’s not even you that gets to him, it’s Bakugou.

Laughing about “She calls you bro?? You fuckin’ nerd, bro-zoned by your own girl!”

Izuku knows it’s just habit and you see him as your man, more than knows mind you.

But he’s never been immune to Bakugou’s torments so it does keep him on high alert, taking note of the multiple times you call him bro.

When you’re leaving the house, it’s a “See you bro.” When you return, it’s a damn kiss alongside “I’m back bro.” Even when you go to say those three special words, it’s somehow tainted by being followed by “bro.”

Izuku doesn’t get mad often, but it’s really starting to agitate him hearing you call for him so casually.

“Okay, no more.” He one day stands up without any warning. Practically stomps over and tackles you to the ground.

It’s a tumble of laughter but one look at Izuku and you know you’re fucked.

His eyes are dark, his expression stern. It’s a look you hardly see on him, being so doting all the time. But it’s one you certainly don’t mind.

“You’ve gone far enough.” His voice is deep, almost rough, you can feel it on your skin. “I think we should just remind you what I’m really called…”

Kirishima Eijirou

Doesn’t notice the difference. And it’s probably because he calls you bro.

Everyone is a bro to him, all his crushes growing up were bros [and he wonders why none of them worked out] even his own Mother is a bro.

However draws the line during sexy times.

He’s kissing your neck, clearly initiating a little time away from work, while you type away at your desk.

“Ah come on bro, not now.”

He quite animatedly deflates, literally sinking with a frown.

“You ruin my fun.” He speaks, pout on his face.

“Sorry Bro, just a lil’ more paragraphs and I’m all yours.” You turn and give him a quick peck.

“No- It’s not that- you just.” He really is a sweetheart who would never be upset by being turned down. “Stop calling me bro.”

“Oh.” You almost laugh. “But you do it all the time.”

“Not while kissing you!!” Kirishima insists.

“Broooo.” You let out a dramatic sigh, paired with a smirk that Kirishima catches on to. He frowns.

“That’s it. I’m banning the word.” Kirishima stands up, determined. “Neither of us can use it anymore.”

You raise an eyebrow in his direction, amused by his new found commitment. He takes no mind to your lack of belief and remains dead set on his new pledge.

Doesn’t last a day.

Gets a call from Bakugou and picks up with “What’s up bro.”

As if he already expects you to be there laughing at his mistake, he shoots his head round and makes direct eye contact with you.

“Told ya’ you couldn’t do it-” You both stare each other down, silently daring the other to say another word. You take on the dare with a brilliant grin. “Bro!”

This is a very me thing to call everyone bro/brother or broski… anyways, clearing out my drafts and found this, I don’t particularly like each part but it did make me laugh a lil so hey! Why not post lol.

[samsvenn]

I'M IN LOVE WITH THE DIABOYS DIARIES HEADCANONS <3 could you continue with the others? 🥺💗

𝐒𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐢 𝐁𝐫𝐨𝐬 𝐃𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 [𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐 ]

tw! graphic mentions of violence and gore sakamaki bros done!

𝐑𝐞𝐢𝐣𝐢

He’s halfway through the diary and it hasn’t even been two months since he’s had it. They all range in how descriptive his days were from eleven pages of how Ayato wrecked their monthly allowance to one short page of how he’s planning to do something extremely sinister to Teddy if Kanato keeps stealing his wallet for candy.

Reiji mostly vents in his diary, but it’s so lifeless that you’d think he’s just internally monologuing for the sake of internal monologuing. 

There are pages where he doesn’t. Some pages call back to the time he found an under-the-table seller for a Victorian tea set he’s had his eyes on since autumn. Some pages have these special, translucent note tabs and each color represents a section.

Muted green sticky note tabs for new-found tea recipes, velvet red note tabs indicate a page that should be steered away from (these pages are just pages Reiji wishes he never wrote and doesn’t want to be reminded of the contents within), and blue tabs for any interesting experiences he’s had in the year. 

The red tabs are cut shorter so that they won’t be so obvious at first glance unless the glance was intentional. 

Reiji likes to write with a fountain pen; a writing tool that is loved because of its smoothness, the way it glides on paper, and fluid flow of ink. For colors, dark blue is his go-to. Writing with warm colors makes his eyes strain and anything too saturated is immediately a no. 

For the fountain pen, Reiji uses the Namiki Falcon produced by Pilot with a medium 0.56 mm nib. The brand itself isn’t a luxury brand like Montblanc, but the Namiki Falcon is nothing short of everything a pen nerd gushes over; beautiful, sleek, crisp writing sounds and neat pen lines, what more could you want?

And knowing Reiji, the amount this man writes not only for his diary but for documents, teacher reports, official doctorates, and more is a boatload to work through if the pen he has isn’t built to cushion said workload. 

His diary’s pretty simple. It’s just a regular, black faux leather hardback. He hides it in a hidden compartment pre-built into his study desk. At first, that compartment was a hidden money stash in the event that something horrible ever happened to his savings. But now, it’s not as dusty as it used to be. 

𝐀𝐲𝐚𝐭𝐨

His diary’s been roughed up. Tears, scratches, the binding near collapse, even Subaru’s diary is in better condition than Ayato’s.

For a diary near death, the irony is that Ayato holds it dear. It’s where his vulnerabilities are written down so he can’t afford to lose it no matter what. He doesn’t know if he should feel relieved that the diary’s near its limits. His secrets die along with it, but it’s also been an outlet for him. 

So, what does he do about it? Nothing. If the diary dies, so be it. If it doesn’t, then good for him. 

Ayato usually jots down the name of the teachers who gave him detention that week or rumored upcoming takoyaki places in the shopping district. Unless it’s really something important, he’ll never jot down anything that reveals his emotional state. 

That all changed once he started doing something… interesting. The true main reason he keeps his diary to himself is that in the diary, he started to talk to himself in third person, then answer it in first person. 

Questions people would never ask him are turned into conversation topics for him to daydream and ask himself about. People would call this a self-soothing mechanism, but Ayato calls it self-hype; being the hype man that’s sorely missing in his life.

“Hey! You don’t need them. In fact, you’re better off by yourself. If they won’t appreciate you, scrap ‘em!”

“...Damn right. I’m the best person around and this is how they treat me?! Un-fucking-believable.”

Ayato uses BIC pens. He doesn’t care what he uses to write as long as they do. They’re inexpensive, affordable, come in a pack of 10, and are readily accessible. Plus unlike fancy pens, they’re much more enjoyable to chew on.

Unlike Laito and Kanato, Ayato doesn't write about his past victims nor does have memorabilia from them. His diary is for him and him only. He likes to write about his muscle gain and how basketball tournaments are turning out. He loves to read back past entries because it motivates him to do more and gives him insight into what he needs to do to keep himself entertained. 

He'll never tell anyone, but he laughs at how stupid he is sometimes. Like the time he forgot to throw a toothpick that he used for picking up takoyaki so that week, his backpack absolutely REEKED of the smell. He's the only one allowed to do this, of course.

His diary is a jumbled mess. Loose pages about to surrender to gravity, water crinkles making the cheap ink fade, stains of what seems to be a protein shake hopefully, and nonsensical scribbling bleeding through the paper. 

 He never wrote his name on the front; for fear that it’ll give away who the owner of his diary is. Good thing that he only writes entries inside his room and nowhere else. His hiding spot is behind the iron maiden. He knows how to move it without the iron maiden’s corners screeching and leaving marks on the floor. 

Ayato’s diary is a simple red school notebook. It’s easier to throw away and it’s not like anyone pays attention to notebooks nowadays.

𝐋𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐨

The things he writes in there are extremely worrisome; so many topics that’d give a Pastor cardiac arrest. It took a long while for Laito to get comfortable with the idea of writing his thoughts down and it took even longer to decipher the small fragments of his trauma into something legible. 

Other than that, Laito uses his diary as a notepad of some kind. Writing down movies he needs to watch, incorrect lyrics he’ll search up later and a handful of his poems make their way into the paper. 

Like his Uncle Richter, Laito prefers to use literature as a medium to express. Because of this, he makes sure that his diary is well-hidden. Out of all the Sakamaki brothers, Laito’s hell-bent on making sure that no one is able to get a hold of his diary. If they do, it’ll raise questions not only about Laito but the vulnerable person underneath and he’d rather die than let that get out. 

His diary’s hiding place is underneath the Church grounds. It’s buried in an aluminum box that’s next to his third victim after Hilde came along. This box is located in the Church’s abandoned cemetery where the first roster of Sacrificial brides are buried. 

No gravestones, not even a coffin for the poor women, just patches of uneven dirt to remind the Church where their loyalties with Karlheinz stand. The same place where his facade was birthed is also the same place where everything in that book contradicts what that facade stands for. 

Since the diary’s hiding place is so convoluted, whenever he writes in the thing, it's a monthly ordeal. Sometimes if things get too rough, it’ll be weekly. This only happens if he’s writing about his feelings though. For his daily ventures, that is in another diary. 

This man has two diaries: one for the nasty crises and the other for things that aren’t quite as deep. There is no way to convince Laito that it’s possible to write all the things he needs in one diary. If he can’t separate his vulnerable self from his daily living, it’ll only admit that he’s not as invulnerable as he made himself out to be. 

His daily diary, it’s filled to the brim with information about his current prey. Living situations, financial status, how perceptive they are, and all the things he needs to manipulate his prey are all there. In that diary, there are extremely explicit photos of his previous victims; a keepsake to reminisce about. They’re all quite sexual, but one thing Laito adds to the polaroids are blotches of their blood on the back. It’s truly a wonder how Laito manages to be so emotionally erratic while also being emotionally apathetic.

These polaroids are shown in an order of events: the first polaroid depicting Laito and the victim 'happy', the second polaroid showing Laito and the victim in intimate poses that are either shot from Laito's P.O.V or in the corner of a room, before ending with the third polaroid generally displaying the victim dismembered. These are the general order in which these polaroids are framed.

 

The second and third polaroids are the ones that are varied the most. The victims are never in the same position and Laito rarely uses the same angle twice. 

The third polaroid is by far the most disgusting one as the camera shows how many times Laito has physically cracked open the poor brides. One polaroid shows a poor girl's ribs tearing out of her lower chest, another polaroid has the eyes of a bride nailed to a tall, imposing, wooden crucifix with a note captioned at the bottom: "Dead eyes won't lie, dead eyes won't stray away, dead eyes won't deceive." 

He uses a fine-tip gel pen and the one he mainly uses is the Hi-Tec-C. He enjoys writing with them and they encourage him to write more than he should. Laito likes to write in black or green. They’re pretty to look at and with his pen and handwriting, he’s in love with how his pages look - despite their horrific contents. 

His daily diary’s indented and has beautiful gold accents. It has a black hardcover and the design on it is pretty minimal. As much as he wanted the diary to dazzle, too much attention is never good with such an item. 

His other diary (the crisis diary) has a lock on it. The front and back are untouched and there’s no easy way to say it but it simply looks lifeless. Perhaps the diary looking so forgettable is the greatest strength it bears. No one would expect much from an unassuming decor in his room, right?

𝐊𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐨

Loves to write his thoughts down, but there’s a problem. His mind’s so jumbled with an overabundance of thoughts lingering that in the middle of writing one thought down, he has already abandoned it for a new one. 

Kanato’s diary has incomplete entries and cryptic drawings that provide a small peephole into what goes on inside his head. Drool, dried blood splotches and his own smudged fingerprints carry themselves through the pages. 

His guilty pleasure is imagining what it would’ve been like to be loved unconditionally and transcribing the feeling down in his diary. When he’s not trapped in his senseless daze, the feeling of being loved is both an escape and a pain that provides a gateway to his longing daydreams. 

Kanato uses crayons or a pencil. The sensory feeling of pigmented wax melting into the groves of the paper and crumbling under the pressure reminds him of the first time he made his first collection of wax dolls. Such an innocent writing tool brings back grotesque, vivid memories of when he used crayons to stuff mouths shut when they wouldn’t stop screaming. 

Stuffing their throats full until red tears on the neck’s skin emerged. One crayon, then another, then another, then another, and just like a bloated balloon, pop!

Writing with pencils provides this soothing sound that Kanato absolutely adores. He uses a 2B pencil to write with. It’s not as hard as an HB pencil and the glide is creamier. Yet even with the lead’s softness, it has a resemblance to the sound the HB pencil produces.

He doesn’t write page to page. Most of his writings aren’t connected. It’s all one big puzzle to piece together and unless you’re Kanato, they honestly don’t make sense. Words scattered, sentences repeated, seeing the same drawing from the fourth page re-drawn on the twenty-first page, contradictory statements, it all just perfectly encapsulates Kanato as a person; disorienting, yet you can’t pry your eyes off him. 

There are pages where Kanato just refuses to finish what he was writing at that moment. If he can’t be bothered, then he won’t. But on days his hands don’t tremble at the first memory of his past breakdowns, the page drowns in wax and lead. 

He likes to rip the pages out and turn them into paper dolls for Teddy. 

Kanato doesn’t keep track of the dates which leads to his diary becoming a book in which he channels all his anger and cries in. Nail marks claw at the pastel purple cover and the burnt smell of ashes somehow haunts this diary. Overall, his diary is just a mess. Physically on the outside? No, if something’s gonna represent Kanato, it has to look perfect. But the inside? The horrors one book contains are astonishing.

The diary cover is very cutesy. It’s carefully littered with adorable bear stickers, tiny dessert stickers, and small pops of color that were sketched with crayons. He's the only one out of the Sakamaki brothers where you can tell his diary is his. 

[moemoemammon]

Ooh! How would the brothers react to an MC that decides to kabedon them?

Reverse Kabedon!

(Feat. GN!MC and the Demon Bros)

✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦ ✦

Lucifer

You catch him in the hall right as he leaves his office, and boy are you lucky that no one else is around to witness the way you slam your arms against the wall around him, trapping him in place.

Lucifer gives you a hard, calculating look... then gently whaps you on the head with the papers he's holding.

Tbh he's amused with the fact that you have the audacity to try something like this. And thanks to Levi's infection influence, he knows exactly what you're doing.

What you hope to get out of it is what he's curious about, but he's not really taking you seriously.

"If it's my attention you wanted, all you needed was to ask. But now that you have it... what are you going to do with it?"

Mammon

OI! Watch it! You nearly made him drop his cup noodles, damn it! What would you have done if it splashed everywhere?!

Wait... why are you so CLOSE you're gonna give a guy a heart attack! 🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫

If he were a cat he’d be all puffed up. He's staring you right in the eyes, trying to gauge what?? you're trying to do??? And you can see the blush slowly creeping up on his face

Stuck between being ready to square up and leaning in for a smooch-

"Y-you're pretty cocky, huh? Tryin' to pull something like this on the Great Mammon.... W..Well what're ya waitin' for?! Ain't ya gonna DO somethin'?!"

Levi

As soon as he realizes what's going on, Levi's heart nearly leaps out of his chest.

For one, you nearly gave him a heart attack when you stopped him right outside his door. And two, this has been one of his fantasies for years... finally...

Wait.. what's he thinking?! This is YOU he's talking about! It's way too much stimulation for his heart to take! It's not like this is some otome game he can pause!!

Also ready to fight. He just freezes up like a deer in headlights, and you're pretty sure he's about to have a heatstroke from the intensity of the redness in his face.

"UWAAAH!!!! Wh-wh-what do you think you're doing, huh?!?! If this is some kind of prank, I'll- MC, seriously! I'm going to die if you keep this up! You get it, don't you?! I'll actually die!!!"

Satan

????hello can he help you???

Satan was just trying to live his best life and catch up on some reading he missed out on nerd, but you insisted on trapping him against the bookshelf (and making him drop a book in the process-)

But can you back up though? He can't grab his book when you're so close, and- oh. He gets it now. From that proud look on your face as a reaction to his surprise, he's pretty sure this is what you wanted.

He doesn't feel helpless, but seeing you try to take dominance over him like this is kind of??? charming, maybe?? He's more embarrassed than anything, but he won't let you know that. He'll just mask it with a witty chuckle you won't suspect a thing-

"You're always full of surprises, but I didn't think you'd try something from one of Levi's books. Could it be that you're trying to impress me? Or maybe you wanted a kiss?"

Asmo

Oh~!! How BOLD of you~!!!❤️❤️❤️❤️

Asmo is a sucker for bold declarations of love, so you've got him practically swooning against the wall while he dramatically fans himself.

But you'd better be careful. Even if he doesn't understand the whole 'kabedon' thing, that doesn't mean he won't play along.

And by 'play along', I mean he flips the situation on you. Your eyes don't even comprehend what they're seeing when he finesses his way into pinning YOU against the wall, giving you a cheeky look as if he's waiting for your mood.

"As much as I love a good tease, you should be careful not to rile me up so much~! You don't expect me to hold myself back when I love you so much, do you? Unless... you're telling me not to hold back at all~?❤️"

Beel

Beel wordlessly stares at you, club sandwich in hand, when you trap him right against the fridge with some kinda smug look on your face.

??something wrong?? This isn't your sandwich he's eating, is it? Wait no he just made it so there's no way-

So maybe you're hungry? Beel just kinda.. presses the sandwich against your lips. But when you refuse and explain that you're trying to be romantic(?), heeeee's not sure he really gets it.

What's so romantic about trapping him against the fridge?? In an effort to understand, he's started kabedon-ing you every time you're near the fridge (until Lucifer tells him to stop)

"I think I get it now. Kabedon is great, because it puts me close to you, and I can grab a snack after. Do you want something?"

Belphie

Hey... Can you move? He's trying to go back to his room. Belphie has no problem sleeping while standing up, but he’d rather have the comfort of his bed instead.

You've got him trapped against the wall, and there's a silence between the two of you as cow man tries to wrap his sleepy mind around what's happening. Then he realizes you're trying to be cheesy romantic

So what does he do? The only obvious thing: He grins at you right before poking his fingers into your vulnerable armpits.

You FOOL. He's got you right where he wants you. Belphie doesn't let up one bit, even when you try to snatch away from his merciless tickling attack.

"Hey, what's the matter? I thought you wanted to be close to me? Come back here. I couldn't run away, so it's not fair if you do~"

[moemammon]

could i please request the obey me ! boyfies with an s/o who is like & chubby ? they get insecure about it (like being tall + chubby) and really are body-insecure to the point it’s like super frustrating too bc they want to express themselves through their outfits but absolutely hate clothes shopping and will break down bc of the amount of people, the clothing sizes, and being upset after trying things on... thank you so much!!

The Demon Bros react to a Body-Insecure GN!MC

(Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. This is something we hear all the time to the point that it almost feels dry and cliche. But! Just know that there's NOTHING wrong with the way you look, despite all the media we see centered around the world's idea of beauty. Beauty is subjective, and not eternal. Just be you. The best 'you' you can be!)

Lucifer

Do you REALLY think an age old demon would see anything wrong with what you look like? He's constantly surrounded by beauty, anyway, in the form of demons and angels alike

Besides, Luci isn't shallow enough to base his affections for you purely on how you look, so you don't even have to question that.

But he does recognize that you don't see yourself in the same like as he does, and he's so, so patient with you. After all, he can't have the love of his life doubting their self worth. The Avatar of Pride won't be having that.

Lucifer takes the time to tell you, everyday, what you mean to him. In the quiet moments when you two are alone, he'll guide your gaze to meet his own, and starts going down the list of the things that make you beautiful.

"To think you'd be self conscious about something like this.... Do you think I'd settle for anything less than perfection? Let me remind you again why I love every inch of you, MC."

Mammon

Taking up modeling gigs means Mammon's seen just about every body type under the sun, so do you seriously think he's that worried about the way you look?

He's a little slow to read the room, so it takes him a while to realize that you're self conscious. But when he tries taking you clothes shopping one day, and sees you're on the verge of tears after trying on two outfits, he gets the clue.

NOW he's being extra as hell in showing you how much he likes you. You start waking up to texts telling you how beautiful you are (with the obligatory threat that you'd better not show his brothers), he keeps putting his arm around you in public, and when he can muster up the courage, he'll even tell you in person how good you look in the outfit you're wearing.

He even starts sending you links to websites he visits to buy clothes. There's some good ones that have a wide range of customization options, and a pretty diverse size chart! It's not so bad if it's online, right?

"Anyone who's worthy of being around THE Great Mammon is worth a million grimm, understand? I don't really get all the fuss about yer body, but... I think ya look fine the way ya are. So smile a little more, alright?"

Levi

Levi can relate when it comes to body insecurities. He's a layabout, and the only exercise he gets is when he's forced to get it. He doesn't think he's much of a looker compared to his brothers, either.

So when you tell him how you feel about the way you look, he gathers up every ounce of otaku™️ strength to tell you that there's nothing wrong with your height, or weight.

He DEFINITELY values personality over looks, and even then it's not like he finds you unattractive. Seriously, he doesn't get your worries at all. Are you sure you can see properly..? They say staring at screens too long can mess up your eyesight, so maybe he should stop forcing you to watch so much tv with him?

And guess what? Levi can sew. Go ahead and bring him the clothes you wanna wear, and he'll get em fixed up for you! Or if you want something custom made, he's got you! Leave it to the master weeb and his endless cosplay knowledge! ✨

"L-Like in anime! It's boring to see the same body types all the time and it's nice when they change it up, s-so....Uh.... Anyway, I like everything about you, okay?! Your body is fine the way it is!"

Satan

According to his nerd calculations, you have no reason to be insecure.

Jokes aside, Satan listens to your concerns and handles them gently. No two people look alike and the world is full of different body types, so who's to decide what is and isn't beautiful?

As he sees it, you're healthy and happy, and isn't that all that matters? He can't take away your anxieties about shopping, but he CAN help you find things you would like to try out. He's pretty sure he has a book that teaches a spell for altering clothes in an instant....

Satan tends to think on the logical side of things, so you can trust that he isn't just saying nice things to spare your feelings. He means every word when he tells you how perfect you are in his eyes.

"Of the billions of people on earth, do you really think anyone can say what 'beauty' is? MC, you're perfect the way you are. Should I write a book about all the wonderful things I love about you?"

Asmo

If there's anyone who can appreciate all body types, it's Asmo. What can you expect from the Avatar of Lust, who's seen all there is to see? If anything, there's more for him to love~!

And his affection for your body isn't even entirely sexual. It's all about aesthetics! He loves every dip and curve of yours, from head to toe!

He knows you find it difficult to find clothes that suit you, so he's started having your clothes tailored. You're a little confused when he randomly starts taking your measurements one day-

Later, he returns to you with all those outfits you kept staring at a little too long, all tailored to your body type. Asmo has CONNECTIONS, baby. He's gonna make sure you find everything you could possibly want. He knows how crucial it is to express yourself through what you wear!

"Didn't I tell you you'd look great in that? I'm never wrong when it comes to fashion! And MC darling, you look as stunning as always! Ooh, I just love the way this accentuates your body~!"

Beel

Beel only has food on the brain, so he's the least likely to care for appearances. He loves you for your heart, because that's what matters the most to him. And when you're happy, he's happy!

He loves the look on your face when you smile at yourself in the mirror, and he wants to see that more often. So when you express your insecurities about your body, Beel has a plan of action in mind.

He hoists you up and settles you onto his bed, first grabbing your thighs, your hips, your torso, your arms, and ends all the touching by cupping your cheeks. His hands are warm with affection, and you could already feel yourself melting into his touch.

He looks you in the eye with that deadpan expression of his, pressing a soft kiss to your temple, and a potato chip to your lips.

"No matter how you look or what you wear, you're still the same MC that I love. Every part of you is just fine, so why do you worry so much about it? I'll remind you over and over if I have to."

Belphie

Um??? That means he has more to hold?? when you guys cuddle?? You're warm, you smell nice, and he loves you. Literally where is the downside to any of that???

Belphie takes your worries with a grain of salt, but he knows how insecure you are so he doesn't brush them off. He DOES however tell you that you're worrying yourself to death.

Also, do you really think a man that sleeps all the time is going to have washboard abs? Belphie definitely has a little chub here and there under those baggy ass clothes of his.

Speaking of clothes, he thinks you should just wear whatever makes you comfortable. You're wearing those clothes for yourself, aren't you? So just wear what you like.

"There you go again, talking badly about yourself. Geez.... I guess I'll just have to hold you in my arms until you realize how silly you're being. Come here."