#I’m not doing that bc I’m gonna gonna go to sleep too | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

quarterlifekitty · 3 days ago

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Okay listen I know I said I would stop but you adding onto könig gave me IDEAS.

Him fucking you while you play on your switch once you two get to his, frankly abysmally plain and sad, apartment in Austria only for him to whine about the switch taking too much of your attention and yoinks it from your hands.

Don't ask how he gets you papers, all that matters is now you're his wife and you're in his home country. Oh, you don't like where he lives? That's okay, he'll pick out a much better place. Oh, you only speak English/your native language? Good. He'll be the only one you need to talk to and he can translate anything you need to read and he'll fill out any silly forms needed.

Hope to god that if you don't want kids that your birth control is a fuckin implant. Though, it will only delay it. Not stop it. He wonders after a month of you living in Austria on top of however fucking long he was deployed near you, and not seeing you take or mention any type of birth control, why you aren't pregnant? Sure, hes.....older.....but that shouldn't be an issue, he read an article about a 68 year old man fathering a new baby a week ago. He's healthy, especially for his size. So just what could it possibly be? He decides to dig into your medical history, just to be sure, you can never be too careful, and there he spots the reason his little maus has yet to take. No worries, he knows a doctor.

Well. This got progressively out of hand. Would you believe me if I said I'm not even a könig main girlie?

I would believe you bc that man takes hold like a virus in your system man

The apartment is just a stepping stone— a family needs a house, he knows that, so he has you help him pick one. And I’m gonna say something. The ones he chooses to take you to and view… he picked based on how you build Minecraft houses. And maybe I’m a weenie, but I don’t think he takes your switch! You can’t really go out because you don’t know the language, and he’s gone for long periods on deployment— it’s good for you to have something to do. If he’s trying to spend time with you, he can just loom over you (you’re getting distracted by his cleavage tbh) and gently pull it away, putting it on sleep mode and on a side table.

And you know what. Perhaps a controversial opinion. He gets hard watching you play animal crossing. The way you decorate your little house and do all of the gardening, cooking, crafting. Taking care of the happiness and needs of all of the cute little animals. You’re already perfect at playing house! You’ve got free rein to use his cards to decorate however you want. Make the house a home, you know? And I don’t know about you, but I always have stuffed animals and cute toys all over my animal crossing house. So, to him, you’re basically already subconsciously ready for a baby.

I doubt reader has an implant in this, because she was terminally celibate before he showed up lol. But I do find the concept soooo funny. That he’s trying to get you pregnant so desperately, but of course he hasn’t told you that at all. He just tells you he’s coming inside and you go okay 💖 yay 💖. So like he could ask if you’re on contraceptives and you’d probably tell him but then he might have to admit to what he’s doing and he’d rather just read your entire medical history lmao. And he totally lies to you about why it has to be taken out. Saying there isn’t really medical care to maintain it in Austria, so you should really just have it taken out now.

And then you ask if it’s ok for him to keep giving you creampies even though your implant is gone. As usual, he says it’s fine— that you can let him worry about that!

#writing #cod fanfic #cod #konig x reader #konig #könig x reader #König #gamer!könig #cw manipulative #cw obsessive

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trickstarbrave · 8 months ago

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I’m high and really weirdly wanna do a Danny phantom rewatch

#I should be asleep.#I’m not doing that bc I’m gonna gonna go to sleep too

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why-the-heck-not · 9 months ago

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no those aren’t weird sex noises coming from ur neighbour’s apartment; it’s ur local insomniac slap & folding bread dough in the wee hours of the morning

#also I was doing that for wayy too long bc I think I autolysed a bit too long so the gluten structure just isn’t gonna be the best no matter #how angry I am at the dough but also idk why I’m bothering bc I’m also 80% sure the sourdough starter is not ready for bread yet #so like I’m going to have the densest loaf tmrw morning/this evening #this is a trial run abt if I remember how to make bread and if I'll actually have something edible it's a bonus #also it truly is meditative so I lost track of time bc ugh the texture of dough is just very nice #good thing abt naming it (the starter) Elvis that I now have my ’’bread making music’’ set and it’s honestly vibes #also yeah in a phase where I sleep abt every other night (unless I like rly rly try but even then it’s like max 4h and I dont get it and I #hate the process of desperately trying to get sleep more than like wasting time making inedible bread)#a human disaster but at least I will have bread #a very dense bread probably but bread nonetheless #march 2024 #2024

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rapidhighway · 2 years ago

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I didn’t go to sculpture again……

#please please please I have anxiety I have a mental illness #I can’t make myself go there it’s hell idk why I’m just so nervous every time I make myself feel sick #and then I get another excuse not to go becuase I literally feel like I’m gonna throw up #I’m not going to pass if I don’t start going there…….#and I cannot handle repeating a semester #I live in fear #and it doesn’t help that I have intermedia class later today which is my second greatest enemy and just as dreadful #banging head on the table #I need to be wrapped in a blanket and go to sleep forever #god even if I go there I’m never going to be able to come up to my prof and talk to him about my project I get physically I’ll at the #slightest suggestion from my friends that I should finally do it #everyone’s done it already #I will literally cry if anyone talks to me #the profs just intimidate me so badly I feel like they hate me #and everyone says they’re super nice but I can’t make myself believe ittttt they will eat me alive #but if I never go I won’t pass the class and repeating the semester will cost money #pleas I have the stupid project idea ready but I just can’t do it I’ve thought about just emailing them and doing it all through email but #I couldn’t do that either I’m just in panic mode instantly #so yeah I’m just venting not asking ppl for solutions 😶✌️ I just don’t want to text my friend again bc I’ve been putting way too much on #them #they do practically everything for me anyway bc I can’t do shit by myself #uh ok I just need to put this SOMEWHERE #I’m gonna curl up and draw metal or whatever #ugh I know I’m making things worse by not coming #but I can’t make myself I just cant I’m gonna have an anxiety attack ✌️#no one look at me #I being sensitive and vulnerable here

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lightspren · 16 days ago

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bad stuff in my brain tonite dudes. not a fan

#kit talks #just so much worry #worry over my nephew and worry over my sister who’s having a godawful month #guilt and shame from how messy my house is and how i’m never going to get around to cleaning it up #like i can’t even start. there’s just so much clutter and i have no idea how to deal with it #i’m too goddamn tired to deal with anything #then i feel guilty bc like i said my sisters life kinda sucks right now and me feeling guilty for also being in a bad spot doesn’t help—#anyone but the guilt is still there #going to a theme park w friends this weekend and i feel Guilty for spending money and Guilty for not using the time to fix my life #and Guilty for not like. doing what my sister did for me and using the time + money to do stuff with the kids #and yes. i know those things are batshit insane. but they won’t go away #and i go back to work tomorrow after being off since friday and GOD i do not want to #my friend has covered for me (and from the sounds of it she’s been fantastic) but there’s still gonna be 100 emails and all the teams msgs #and having doctors whine about how ‘everything burns down when you’re not here!!!!!!!’#and i’m just already tired. i don’t want to deal with any of this #anyway. that’s that. so i guess i need to try and make myself sleep so at least i’ll just be normal tired tmrrw n not sleep deprived tired

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seventh-district · 1 month ago

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tfw u finally go to make urself a dinner plate and some nasty ass man walks into the kitchen, picks up the entire serving bowl of creamed corn and puts his filthy mouth on the bowl like it’s a giant cup and tilts it straight in. multiple times. 🙃

#could you not wait long enough to get a fucking spoon and your own bowl like a civilized human respectful of other people #Seven’s Public Diary #vent #vent post #food mention #yeah no it’s cool it’s fine it’s not like i wanted to eat some too or anything #it’s not like that’s one of the only vegan dishes here that i can therefore eat haha no it’s fine #i guess a normal person wouldn’t let it bother them but my OCD is having none of it. that corn is Tainted with your Mouth Germs now #oh what you want one of the last rolls that i was gonna eat? yeah no that’s cool man that’s fine eat as much as you want! :)#i hate the holidays more and more every year. nothing but stress and for what. i don’t even like these people #but whatever i guess i shouldn’t bitch about it when i choose to remain here #as if everyone with a shitty family has the power and ability to just Leave. i don’t think you realize the extent of my disability #but fucking whatever #someone put dirty plates in the cabinet with the clean ones #someone put the turkey in with a sink full of dishes #someone put the mashed potatoes in the bread box #i’m not even exaggerating #ahhh the joys of being the only sober person here. man what the actual hell. what level of intoxication must one reach to do this shit #whatever it’s fine i just have to learn to stop giving a fuck. let them be stupid and live with the consequences.#it’s late and i’m getting a stress headache. time to go brave the kitchen once more and actually get food this time #then i can be miserable in bed. but with food :) and eat myself sick as a shitty form of self-soothing #but it’s fine today bc it’s literally Eat Too Much day in the US so for once it’s kinda normal #then be too tired and depressed to make myself brush my teeth. and therefore contribute to my dental issues. two birds and all that #am i even making sense anymore. im so tired. of being a person. and like. existing #but im grateful to have food and running water and electricity and a place to sleep and everything else i take for granted #so i should just focus on that and try to ignore all the bad #ough i feel sick. okay Food Time fr this time. let’s hope no one’s in the kitchen now

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cuteniarose · 5 months ago

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@katkastrofa: *forgets a few OCs when making a list because it’s been a long day, she’s tired and brain farts happen to everyone occasionally*

#I’m sorry. I can excuse liu and afarin bc one only exists in flashbacks and the other has only been drawn twice #but LIEN-HUA?#our precious baby child??#the catalyst behind literally the entire story being the way it is?#fucking criminal #jail. I’m a prison abolitionist but–#lucky for you the judge can very easily be bribed 😁#you may atone for your sins at the altar of delicious smut #I realise this is nonsense for 99.999% of people. however #this is my blog and I can do what I want #I have a personal blog for a reason but if I wanna use this one I’m gonna use this one #sue me #but for the record lien-hua is p’li’s little sister and whether she lives or dies sends the story in two completely opposite directions #and by story I mean entire avatar world since her survival leads up to red lotus korra #okay enough rambling. it’s 7 a.m I should probably try to sleep a little #I sobbed for half the night because I suddenly felt really lonely and unwanted. so now I’m shitposting to cope #:’)#and yes I know that image quality is horrendous but there’s nothing I can do about it #that’s how procreate exported it. what do you want me to do #sure I could just make the whole thing a text post but the picture makes it funnier #okay that’s it I’m done. going to bed now byeeeeee #(who am I kidding I’m not going to bed I’m too emotionally unstable for that)

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arionaleilani · 10 months ago

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1. it’s my 24th birthday today, so my goal of being published by the time i’m 25 is now a one year looming monster, but i never specified what kind of published and am currently looking in various literary magazines that are recommended for writers who have yet to be published, so i’m surprisingly confident that i can make it work? and tbh even if whatever i write isn’t officially published before my 25th birthday, if i have someone in the process of being published then i’ll be happy!! no matter what though, i’m gonna try to be proud of myself for at least giving it my best shot!!

2. i honestly love that my birthday is on the ides of march because the ides of march meme shitposting is only a thing on tumblr but it also being my birthday makes it easier to like. be excited about the ides of march outside of tumblr. like even in person i can be like “it’s my birthday! i’m an ides of march babe (:” and if someone is like oh what’s that? or if they say something along the lines of oh like julius caesar? i can be like yep!! and even if it’s a small thing outside of tumblr it brings me immense enjoyment and amusement being able to bring it up off of tumblr

3. transportation situation has been very rough since june 2023 when i totalled my car, my gap insurance are being assholes and i ended up putting my foot down on the phone with them yesterday which i’m pretty proud of because i am NOT a confrontational person (something i’ve been working on this past year, so seeing some improvement with my ability to hold my ground and not be a pushover yesterday was very cool!!) i was told i’d get a response from them by friday next week no matter what, and if i don’t then friday of next week i will continue to wreak havoc upon them. but my moms car which i’ve been using since my accident broke down yesterday, hopefully it’s fixable but my parents were saying it might be done for, so trying to think of how i’m gonna get to work next week is kind of stressing me out lmao, but for now i’m just gonna focus on enjoying my birthday the best i can because i don’t want to start off being 24 with an overwhelming anxiety for something that won’t be a potential issue until monday. plus i already messaged my boss today to let her know that i’m going to do everything i can to make it work out but just so she’s in the loop and knows of the potential of me not being able to make my morning shifts (one of my coworkers said she’s more than happy to give me a ride for our afternoon shifts which does help relieve some of the stress!) and i told her i’d let her know for sure sunday so that if necessary she can have time to figure out someone to fill in for me in the mornings!

overall: life is weird and i ended being 23 yesterday with a shitty situation but a positive outlook and i am going to enjoy my first day of being 24 no matter what because honestly i fucking earned it. happy friday everyone, i hope it’s a good day for you and me both!

#aritalks #i did cry a little bit when i first woke up because i dont really know what to do about work and also i hate not having a car i can use #not only because of the work aspect but also getting my license when i was 18 gave me a freedom i didn’t have before #and i don’t like having to rely on other people just to like go to the fucking store or something yk #but then my best friend/roommate messaged me happy birthday and i was like fuck it! today is going to be a good day!#the stressful uncertainties can wait until tomorrow #also one of my best friends who hasn’t said happy birthday to me the past two years #(not intentionally im p sure they were just busy on my birthdays the past two years #and then had that moment of ‘oh shit i didnt send a message fuck i think its too late now’ which i totally get bc anxiety things yk)#was one of the first people to message me happy birthday!!#i’m also hoping to still be able to go see my mom and then stay the night at my dads tonight #so i can see both my parents and also my baby siblings for my birthday #my dads working today but after he texted happy birthday i sent him a text asking if he thinks we could still make it work #my mom is asleep still i think (she called me at midnight and left a voicemail singing happy birthday!! but her sleep schedule has been all #over the place recently so i’m waiting until 11:30 to call her which is in like 30 mins)#but she said something yesterday about driving out to me to give me a hug and also bring me my diabetes stuff that got delivered #(her house is my mailing address because i know it’s not going to change bc it’s my great grandparents house that she’s partially inhereting #when my great grandpa dies but since i have moved out of my dads my address has changed twice and i didnt have a mailbox at my last place so #just for the sake of consistency and not having to worry about important shit getting sent to the wrong address i’ve had her house as my #mailing address since i moved out of my dads at 19)#so i think i’m gonna ask her if she can just pick me up instead so i can go to her house w her and hang out with her #and hopefully my dad will be able to at least stop by with my siblings so i can see them too #i’d like to stay the night with them but if we can’t make it happen then i can also stay the night w my mom and hopefully tomorrow figure #out the car situation. might have to rent a car for a week if i can afford it? best case scenario is my moms car can be fixed but i still #dont know whats wrong with it ik there are two potential problems and one is fixable the other is not #the fixable one would cost like $150-$400 to fix depending on if we get a used part or a new one #if its $150-$200 ish i can probably afford to pay for the whole thing or at least most of it #but if its more than that hopefully my dad or one of my family members can help #and i can just pay them back in like $50 increments with my next few paychecks #just realized i said i wouldnt worry abt the car thing today and also i think im at tag limit to i’ll stop now lmao xoxo gossip girl ❤️

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binders-and-beanies · 8 months ago

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#sry I need to vent more abt my tattoo pain bc I physically cannot do anything productive rn im completely and totally incapacitated #can’t read anything beyond short posts or texts. can’t eat or move at all #tried to sleep through it so it would at least Be Tomorrow so I can get medical help. but the jolts of pain make me like Jump #hence me being sent home from work early today like it’s not even that I was complaining I was just flinching involuntarily so much #and was unable to work or function at all. thank god I don’t work retail rn I remember the pain of tattoo infections in that context #it’s so Abrupt it feels like I’m being stabbed or repeatedly bitten #literally trying not to scream bc I have a roommate. but he almost certainly hears me crying and saying ouch #which sucks bc I barely know the guy lol he has no context. At least on my drive home I could scream as much as I needed #literally would go to the ER if I could afford it and that sounds so dramatic bc it is #it doesn’t feel like it can wait. genuinely don’t know how I’m gonna get through the night #I haven’t slept in like 60 hours and I doubt I will tonight. but it hurts too much to even tell if I’m tired #and I don’t have time for this!! I have so much I need to be doing. I hate that the only way I can have Time is to be Extra Disabled #in a way that leaves me completely unable to do the things I normally can fight through despite burnout #and I was just at health services yesterday asking them to do insurance paperwork that they couldn’t do #it’s embarrassing having to be like hey I was just there but can I come back #I have Another tattoo infection but I pinky promise I take such good care of them #and my artist is like the best of the best too. it’s like it doesn’t matter what either of us does to keep me safe #and I know if anyone responds to this it will be to tell me to stop getting tattoos #but that’s literally like telling me not to get top surgery if I’m immunocompromised n might have recovery complications #both are equally important gender affirming medical procedures to me I’m not joking #and I hate always having to justify this whilst in agonizing pain. I hate answering the same things every time bc still no one believes me #I say this as someone who lives every moment in baseline pain that would have your average person writhing on the floor and I ignore it #this is truly unbearable if I hadn’t been through it a million times I would think it was life threatening #just needed to get it out ig. bc it’s all I can physically do. until health services opens in 12 hours #PLEASE let them have availability tomorrow bc i have literally no option on weekends #this is just. so upsetting and embarrassing. I don’t have time or emotional capacity for this #personal #mine #vent post

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exopelagic · 11 months ago

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I wiped out so hard tonight my KNEES

#I fell over. so many times. including two of the worst falls I’ve had in a WHILE #god the first one literally like minute and a half on the ice i lose a foot under me and do the splits. crash into the barriers #I am notably Not flexible I cannot do the splits. I don’t know how I kept skating afterwards #the worst fall I have ever had however was right at the end and the thing that made me get off #we were playing a thing and both me and this other guy we’re trying to catch this girl who turned out to be Also going very fast #three way collision all falling forwards on top of each other #we SLID there were BLADES BY MY HEAD im lucky im short im amazed nobody got actually hurt #except like. my knees which are now staging a coup I rlly should ice them but I don’t have ice and I just wanna sleep #but GOD tonight was a mixed bag #i have acquired the instagram and will probably get him on committee if he sends me the thing #also slowly thinking hrm yeah he’s probably straight #anyway good news: i think we’re pretty solidly friends now. bad news: prooobably regrettably heterosexual #idk straight guys shouldn’t be allowed to be cute and funny and good at skating it’s not fair #aaaanyway. it’s my own fault bc I meet most new people through hockey now and this sport is pretty notoriously not queer #it’s a little different here but the people who end up Good are largely not yknow. and I am unfortunately into guys who can skate #also they end up being the people I actually get to talk to with what I do. dumb as hell. they should invent gay hockey players #anyway my assessment is still vibes based there’s time for me to be proven wrong but we will see. it’d be funny if he was queer after this #will think abt texting him on a day that isn’t tomorrow bc tomorrow’s gonna be too much and I would like to have some time to chill sometime #anyway this is my periodic reminder to myself that I’m literally just Allowed to have feelings. fucked up that it’s true #but like it’s just. allowed. and it’s not even that I’m dumb or have bad taste or smth like that and over like what.#almost two years? there have been 5 guys total. mr prick who WAS queer unfortunately. and while the other four did turn out to be straight #that was due to 1. guy literally had rainbow fucking stick tape and Everyone thought he was gay. also I was just kinda fucking around there #2. talked to him like three times before asking him out. agrees to dinner bc he thinks it’s funny. 3. many signals bc bunch of queer friends #still unconfirmed but be does have a girlfriend ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 4. okay maybe I should know better by now but he’s cute okay I’m allowed to hope #it’s not even like I’ve DONE anything other than talk to him dude you’re fine you’re allowed to feel things #aaaanyway. bed now. eepy. will talk to him later. he complimented my hair okay I’m done now going to sleep #very sorry to anyone who reads these tags for just going on abt this guy but also no I’m not scroll down #luke.txt

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theythemmer · 1 year ago

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for years my friends have tried to get me back into minecraft and idk how to explain to them that after tosoth the game will never be the same . it’s been A DECADE and this fic still rules over my brain