#I’m a strong independent woman who does not need a man

[skinreflectsthesun]

Ugh I have to go get an oil change and I hateeeee doing car things 🙄😐

[haoboutyou]

strong and independent (?!) | choi seungcheol

fluff, established r/s | 821 words | like one swear word

an: i fell sick again :/

divider credit

 “–and then he freaked out! It wasn’t even that bad!”

You giggle, the live feed of your best friend frantically waving her arms around as she dramatically retells a story enlarged on your laptop screen. The dying afternoon sun peeks from above your screen, golden hour flooding your apartment. You and Yerim have been on call for the majority of the afternoon, your sweet best friend’s voice accompanying you as you sit on the floor, trying to assemble a new Ikea dresser. The parts are scattered methodically as you slowly work your way through each drawer, Yerim’s voice spilling into your living room like a juicy podcast.

“Yeah? Then what did you do next?”

“Why do you always assume I did something?”

You send her a Look, one that tells her that you know her well enough to know she definitely did something. The camera does a good job of conveying your intentions because she sighs, and you throw your head back in laughter as she reluctantly jumps into an explanation.

“...So obviously, I have to–”

“I’m done!” You yell out, not caring that you’ve interrupted Yerim mid-explanation. She leans closer to the camera for a better look at the product of 3 hours of hard work, her face completely covering your screen. You pick up the laptop, angling it so that she can take a better look at it.

“Woah, Y/nnie! That looks pretty good!” If the camera is facing you again, maybe she can see how your shoulders have risen higher than Mount Everest. “That’s better than anything I’ve ever built.”

You both cringe, remembering the time Yerim tried to fix a new chair. She ended up fixing it upside down (how?!), resorting to calling you at 2am, crying for you to come over and fix it. Safe to say, she’s never touched another assembling project again.

Her lips jut out into a pout towards you when you place your laptop back on the coffee table. “How are so good with tools anyway?”

You just shrug your shoulders. “Maybe I’m just a strong, independent young woman who doesn’t need no man.”

“Yeah right, no man,” Yerim scoffs, making little quotations out of her perfectly manicured fingers. 

You throw her a questioning look as you get to clearing your surroundings while Yerim continues her story. Loose screws here, cardboard boxes strewn there– you’ve certainly created a mess in the living room, sitting right in the eye of the hurricane of it all. 

The front door swings open, signalling Seungcheol’s arrival. Your boyfriend walks in, takeout in hand as he smoothly removes his shoes and coat by the entrance.

“I’m home~”

“In here!” You holler back.

Shuffling towards your voice, he walks into the mess that is currently in your living room. His little figure appears in frame, prompting Yerim to wave at him.

“Hey, Seungcheol!”

“Yeri! Long time no see!” He places his stuff on the table and stoops to kiss the top of your head. “Hi, baby! Whatchu up to?”

“Cheollie~” You melt into his touch, leaning back against his legs. Your head tilts up as you bat your pretty lashes at him, arms spread out to highlight the new dresser. “Look what I did today!”

“You fixed it yourself?” You nod. He eyes the dresser, hand on his chin as he seemingly inspects it from all angles before giving a nod of approval. “Couldn’t have done it better myself!”

You grin at his compliment. Just as quickly, though, your lips curve into a frown.

“It’s a little too heavy though; I can’t carry it into the bedroom.”

“I can do that, baby. You’ve already done all the hard parts.” He pushes his t-shirt sleeves up, patting his arm as he flexes the muscles there. “I’ll do all the heavy lifting, okay?”

“Okay!” He makes a show of lifting the dresser, puffing his chest a little and letting his muscles ripple as he settles on a comfortable grip. “Bedroom right?” You hum in confirmation, and then he’s off to transport the piece of furniture to its rightful place.

On-screen, Yerim’s jaw dropped. She had literally just watched you single-handedly manhandle the dresser to its side and back up again, fully completed, mind you, just to place anti-slip stickers on its legs. Too heavy? Too heavy?!

“Don’t need no man, my ass,” she mutters loud enough for you to hear.

Your head whips towards her direction. “What was that?” Ugh, even your voice has turned sickeningly sweet at the sight of your boyfriend.

“Nothing~”

“Baby! Where do you want this?” Seungcheol’s voice rings out from down the hall. Yerim takes it as her cue to end the video call. 

“I’m gonna go now. Brunch on Sunday?”

“Brunch on Sunday,” You affirm. Yerim shoots you a thumbs-up before ending the call without so much as a goodbye. Strong independent young woman who doesn’t need to man, she scoffs. Yeah, right.

[holylulusworld]

Big girls don't cry (1)

Summary: You are no stranger to heartbreak.

Pairing: CEO!Steve Rogers x Plussized!Reader

Warnings: heavy angst, strong reader, mentions of former heartbreak, fluff, arguments, Steve being an idiot, heartbreak, implied smut  

Big girls don’t cry masterlist

Prologue

You were giddy for Steve’s arrival. He was away for yet another business trip for over two weeks and you missed him dearly.

Even if the little overprotective voice in the back of your head repeatedly told you to not get in too deep with Steve, you were already in love.

He’s the kind of man who makes it easy to fall for him. Steve is sweet, smart, funny, caring, loving and it doesn’t hurt that he looks like he stepped right out of a fashion magazine.

That’s the reason you were all dolled up and carried a basket with his favorite food and a bottle of wine toward his penthouse.

You took a deep breath to calm your nerves. When you are in love, you are always scared that the dream abruptly ends. Like so many times before…

Men love to spend time with you and to fuck you into the mattress. But most of the time, they seem to be ashamed to be seen with you. The chubby girl.

Size shouldn’t matter. You know that. But it still does. Especially to men.

“He loves you. You love him. Steve is a good man,” you recited your mantra to not spiral into distrusting the man you love again. One too many times you ruined a blooming relationship because of bad experiences with men in the past. “Steve will be happy seeing you.”

After calming your nerves, you pushed the key Steve gave you into the lock, and put a big smile on your face. It wasn’t too hard to look happy. Because, right at that moment, you were happy.

“Steve?” You called for your boyfriend while walking into his home. “Baby, are you already home? Babe?”

“Right here, doll.” He poked his head out of the bedroom. His hair was still damp from the shower he just had and he grinned. “Damn, I wanted to surprise you, Y/N.”

“I thought it was my turn to surprise you,” you flashed him a smile. “Take your time, I’ll prepare dinner for us. I got everything we will need.”

“I wanted to eat something sweeter,” Steve teased, eyes dropping to your crotch. “Maybe after dinner, I’ll get a nice dessert.”

“If you are a good boy,” you cooed and winked at him. “Now, get ready and I’ll take care of the food.”

Steve was all over you after dinner. You barely had the time to carry the dishes into the kitchen before he had you on the kitchen counter, legs wrapped around his body, and his cock buried to the hilt.

You made the sweetest noises only for him, holding tight onto his body as he took you apart. Piece by piece he broke your body. Just like he broke all the walls you built around your heart.

Later you lay next to him, wide awake as you couldn’t fathom that this wonderful man is in love with you.

On the outside, you are a strong woman. Independent and downright cocky. But on the inside, you are still the vulnerable girl who got her heart broken one too many times.

“You should get some sleep too,” Steve mumbled. He nuzzled his head in your chest, groaning as he nipped at your plush flesh. “Damn, you feel so good every time.”

“Sir, you wore me out,” you laughed when he lifted his head to look at you with glassy eyes.

“I love you,” he suddenly said, making your heart flutter. You wanted to say something and return the sweet words, but the doorbell broke the spell. “Fuck, who’s on my door at that time of the day?”

“It’s barely eleven pm, baby.” You rolled to your side to watch Steve get out of bed. He was still stark naked, and you bit your lip while admiring his naked backside. “I like the view, Sir.”

“I know you do, dirty girl,” he looked over his shoulder, flashing you a smile. “Give me a minute.” Steve cussed when the doorbell rang again. “Yeah, I’m coming. Just give me a moment here!”

He grabbed his pants and stumbled out of the room to open the door and yell at whoever ruined his night.

While Steve answered the door, you slipped out of bed and grabbed his dress shirt. You wanted to know who dared to come to his apartment at that time of the day.

Slipping out of the bedroom, you smirked as you recognized Sam and Bucky’s voice. They seemed to argue about a club and some girls. Steve grunted and told them that you came to his penthouse to spend the night with him.

“I’m telling you, you’re whipped, Stevie,” Bucky argued loudly. You rolled your eyes because men always tell their friends in a relationship they are whipped. “You shouldn’t settle down. Let’s have some more fun. We met those cute girls.”

“Buck, it’s late and I just got back from my business trip. I don’t want to discuss this right now. I got a new deal ahead and a lot of stuff going on. I got no time to go to a club.”

You smiled at that. Steve rather spend time with you than go to a club. “You are so whipped,” Sam huffed. “Can you not leave your lady alone for one night?”

“Guys…just drop it,” you frowned when Steve’s voice got angrier. “I need to go back.”

“Why are you all over that woman? You barely know her. All the other girls were just fun to you!” Bucky didn’t give up.

Steve had enough. He didn’t want to argue about your relationship and explain his feelings to his friend. So, he made the stupidest mistake of his life.

“All the other girls don’t have a grandmother who knows Harlan Thrombey. You know that my company has wanted to buy Blood like wine for a while. Now I got the chance because granny will gladly offer her help to save her friend's company.”

“Wait. You’re dating the girl to get close to her granny?” Sam wrinkled his nose. “That’s not cool man. You can’t just—fuck…”

“Fuck?” Steve cocked his head. “I…we are…” He turned around like in slow motion to meet your angry eyes. You looked crestfallen, but at the same time, like an angry Valkyrie, ready to attack. “Baby…doll…it’s not like that. I…”

“You,” you jerked your head toward Sam and Bucky, “fuck off. I got something important to discuss with your friend.” You stalked toward his friends to shove them out of the apartment, slamming the door in their faces.

It took you a moment to remind yourself that you are not broken. No. You won’t ever allow a man to break you.

Steve gulped hard when you finally turned around to face him. “Baby, I can explain.”

You pushed him against the wall opposite the door and sneered. Steve was too shocked at the events and your strength to even fight you.

“You’re so strong,” he babbled, unsure how to explain that he didn’t mean the things he said. He was annoyed by his friends and the pressure his bosses put on him. “Doll…”

“Do you want to know why I got strong?” You huffed as yet another man only used you. “Because of men like you. You know the kind of guy only being with you to take advantage of you.”

“I didn’t…I wouldn’t…” Steve stammered. “Please, let me explain.”

You only frowned at his pitiful try to explain his behavior. “My heart is a fortress.” You leaned closer to look Steve straight in the eyes. “Don’t believe for one moment I opened up for you.”

“Baby doll, I love you. Please let me…please.” Steve watched you push off him, and step away. Moments ago, you two were a happy couple, and now your relationship was in shambles.

“It was fun while it lasted.” You shrugged. “We had fun. Now the fun is over. Let’s not cry over spilled milk.”

Steve could only watch you walk back toward the bedroom to grab your clothes and leave his life. He felt his heart beat out of his chest as you hurriedly threw your clothes on.

“Doll…please…”

You walked past him, not sparing him a glance. He simply wasn’t worth your attention any longer. Another heartbreaker, nothing else.

He called your name, hoping to stop you from leaving.

“Oh. And Steve.” You looked over your shoulder.

“Yeah?” He hopefully asked.

“Stay the fuck away from my grandmother and our business or I’ll make sure you regret your mother ever pressed you out of her vagina. I will make your life a living hell. And just you know, first thing in the morning I’ll call Uncle Harlan to tell him about your plans…”

You didn’t cry on your way out of the building, or on the taxi ride back home.

You didn’t cry when you called your grandmother to tell her about Steve’s plans and asked her to warn Harlan.

You only allowed yourself to break down and cry after you made sure Steve Rogers couldn’t cause damage to Harlan’s business.

If only you listened to the tiny voice in your head.

Well, next time you’ll be smarter.

Next time you won’t let anyone in.

>> Part 2

[pagannatural]

2.17 Heart

- this episode can’t really be called underrated but it makes me insane in a special and specific way that needs airing

-Dean is cleaning their guns and geeking out about how cool werewolves are, how they haven’t seen one since they were kids, and how good it is to know how to handle the situation, and Sam is teasing him. This callback to their shared childhood is important.

-Dean asks Sam their next step the way a teacher asks their student because Sam is still learning hunting from Dean. Sam answers correctly, looking like he’s trying not to smile and looks down and then up at Dean. He looks like he’s flirting. He loves seeing Dean happy.

- Madison tells the brothers that the victim was the kind of guy to hit on everyone in a five mile radius after a few scotches, you know the type, and Sam at first smiles knowingly. But then he looks over at Dean, who’s smiling his fuck-me smile at Madison, and his face falls. “Yeah, I do, actually,” he says.

Dean’s interest in Madison (and other women in general) really bothers him in this moment.

- Dean tells Madison someone needs to stay with her in case the werewolf shows up. The moment she leaves the room Sam tells Dean “you go, I’ll stay” with this expression that seems very serious, not like he’s just wanting to be the one who spends time with the pretty woman.

They decide to settle this the old fashioned way which is rock-paper-scissors (ro-sham-bo). Another callback to their childhood. Sam wins because Dean always chooses scissors which is honestly fascinating to me— I would have guessed Dean would pick rock because it’s the solid strong masculine option and because Sam would choose paper, but of course Dean chooses the tool, the blades. Sam grasps Dean’s arm after and his hand lingers. Again, he does not seem to have done this out of any interest in Madison, it seems like he just doesn’t want to witness Dean with her.

-This is not the face of a man who likes this woman

It reminds me of how he acted around Sarah In Provenance. He has to perform liking her for Dean, but he never shows any signs of genuine interest. Madison even dumps a basket of delicates onto the table in front of him to fold and he scrunches up his face and moves to the couch.

- Sam observes that Madison is smart and independent and asks her why she was with a stalker, and she answers that it’s not like he introduced himself like Hi I’m possessive and controlling and I like to punch people. She also says he’s wanted by the police, and that she was too insecure to leave until she realized she could take control of her life.

Madison and Sam are set up as direct parallels. She ends up being a monster without even knowing and without intending any harm, which is what Sam fears. Also, the way she’s describing her ex-boyfriend sounds a lot like Dean: possessive, controlling, likes punching people, wanted by the police. I think Dean has a lot of very redeemable qualities and for the most part he treats Sam very kindly, but he is all those things. It’s also how Sam would describe John, who he got away from by taking control of his life. The difference is that Sam actually wants to be with Dean.

- Dean kills the first werewolf in this episode. The werewolf is dying in the street and Dean stands over him and watches him turn back into a scared and confused man right before he dies. Dean obviously doesn’t enjoy seeing a man lose his life, and it complicates his earlier excitement over hunting a werewolf. The grown-up version of this hunt isn’t fun any more.

- Dean can see how Sam cares about Madison because he relates to her, and the way he watches Sam is so tender and protective. When Madison hugs Sam, Dean watches them with such bittersweet understanding

and then excuses himself very obviously so that Sam and Madison can fuck. Which they do. Which is just wild.

Because Sam decides to have sex with the first woman since Jessica because 1) Dean tells him to and 2) he sees this woman as the version of himself that gets to live without becoming a monster

- when Sam knocks frantically on his door, Dean opens up, knowing right away something is wrong and reassuring Sam that they’ll find her. The way that Sam runs straight to Dean’s door when he’s scared and needs help and Dean is right there without another thought is very romantic tropey.

-Sam yells at Dean because Dean’s willing to kill Madison without question but unwilling to kill Sam no matter what he does including murder. Dean looks a little jostled to be confronted by this, but I think to him it’s just so clear that Sam is a special and specific category from the rest of humanity and creation that he doesn’t see or doesn’t care about the hypocrisy. Sam is the center of his universe and his entire system of values. Everyone on earth or in hell is either Sam or Not Sam. It’s funny because Sam is like this about Dean too, but he just accepts it.

-Dean explains the situation to Madison calmly and honestly. It’s the decent thing to do, and also the difficult thing. He’s not cold or numb to the work, but he is able to handle it and keep his head as long as it’s not about Sam.

-Madison asks Sam to be the one to kill her and Dean watches Sam struggle. He’s been watching Sam carefully and protectively this entire episode.

-She uses language so similar to the language Sam uses to beg Dean to kill him—asking for help, saying she wants it to be him who does it, “I’m asking you to save me.” She tries to hand Sam the gun.

Dean gets up at this point and stands behind Madison, his eyes on Sam as he moves, and slowly takes the gun out of her hands. This shifts the focus off Madison and solely onto the brothers for the remainder of the episode.

His eyes stay on Sam’s as he does this, and Sam is somehow looking up at Dean pleadingly. His romantic interest is begging him for help with tears in her eyes in what will be the last moments of her life and Sam is staring at Dean behind her.

The sexual relationship between Sam and Madison is explicitly compared to Dean and Sam’s relationship. It wasn’t necessary for the werewolf character to be a woman who Sam sleeps with—the very first woman that he is with since Jessica. She’s the stand-in for Sam in this case, and Sam is put in Dean’s shoes.

The brothers go into the other room and Dean assures Sam he doesn’t have to do this, that he’ll handle it. He wants to take care of Sam and spare him this, just like he has since they were children, but he can’t this time. Sam feels he has to because she asked him, and asks Dean for the gun.

It’s a very intentional choice that Sam won’t do this for Madison until he has to ask Dean, and that in the end it’s a conversation between the brothers that forms the emotional tension and climax of the episode. Dean did what Sam needed him to do by being the one to give him the choice: let me protect you from this or do it yourself. Before, the choice was more about Madison. Now it’s about Sam and Dean’s relationship.

- Sam looks back at Dean before he walks away, like a frightened child who needs help because he really doesn’t want to do this, but he knows it’s the right thing to do as a hunter. In doing this, Sam has played out the two things from Madison that he wants from Dean, that Dean can never give him— Dean will never let their relationship become physical, and he will never kill Sam.

The camera stays on Dean’s face as the gun goes off and the episode ends. Dean can’t save Sam from this, he can’t protect him from one of the responsibilities that comes with their lives as hunters. He’s terrified that he won’t be able to save Sam at all. The days when he could take care of Sam and shield him are over, and they both have to leave that part of their childhood behind. It’s not that Dean can’t save Sam in the end, because at the end of all of this their love for each other is what saves the world. It’s that their innocence can’t survive what’s coming. They have to grow up and face the realities of their lives. Their incestuous love for each other is one of those realities, but they aren’t there yet.

[ficnation]

Chapter 2: The Guilt She Bears

Series: “She” Word count: 2,5k+ Pairing: Angel Reyes x Female! Reader; Past! Angel Reyes x Luisa Espina Warnings: SPOILERS for Mayans MC season 5 episode 7, mayans mc typical warnings A/n: I’m starting to enjoy all of this angst muahaha

Main Masterlist

Mayans MC Masterlist

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A few days have passed since Luisa’s death. Angel tries to return to the life he once knew, but it isn’t easy. He tries not to think about Luisa, but the apartment they once shared reminds him of her every second of the day. Every moment he spends there makes it harder not to reach for a bottle of cheap whiskey and the company of another woman.

One day he shows up at your doors, hastily packed bags in his hands as he supports Maverick’s bottom with one muscular arm. Angel’s fist shakes as he raises it to knock on your door. The sound echoes in his ears. He wonders if you’re even home, he forgot to text you before getting in the car, but something in his heart tells him you will be there. You’re always close when he needs you.

As Angel waits, staring intently at the door, each minute feels like an hour. The weight of worry and anticipation seems to become physically tangible. Finally, his impatience wins, and the man reaches for the doorknob, but the door is slowly pushed open from inside before he can make contact.

The door opens just an inch so you can peer out at the intruder with a grimace. You look exhausted, your hair is all over the place, and your eyes tell him you haven’t slept in a while. You give the impression of someone who has been through hell and is struggling to survive. On top of all that, you seem stressed and worn out, ready to give in at any moment. Angel knows he doesn’t look much better, but seeing you like that still worries him.

The grimace falls from your face when you recognize him, and you open the door wider. You see the bags he’s holding in his hands as he stands before you, your expression turning into one of pure confusion.

“Angel? What are you doing here?” you ask him with a raspy voice. You notice Maverick in his other arm. The baby looks just as tired as his father, his big brown eyes drooping sleepily.

“Please, can I come in?” His voice is pleading even though he knows you’d never refuse him that.

You nod, stepping back out of the way to let him in. He can feel your eyes studying him intently as he walks inside. You watch his every move, every breath, and every blink.

“What’s going on?” You grab Maverick from his arms, holding him against your chest as you kiss the crown of his head softly.

Angel heads over to the couch and sets his bags next to it, letting himself fall onto the furniture heavily. He ignores your question for now, and you refrain from asking again, focusing instead on the child in your hold.

“Is he okay? Does he feel better?” you question, observing the little boy. He’s so quiet and tired. You wonder if he can’t sleep without his mommy, if he can sense her absence in his life.

“He’s okay. Just doesn’t sleep well lately,” your friend explains with a deep sigh.

“Oh… poor baby,” you say to Maverick, caressing his soft hair. The child presses his face into the crook of your neck, grabbing your shirt in his tiny fists. You turn your gaze back toward Angel. “What’s in all those bags?”

He doesn’t respond to that question, instead cutting right to the point. “I can’t be there anymore. Everything reminds me of her,” the man confesses, his eyes pleading.

You pause, trying to understand what he’s asking. “You want to... live here?” you finally say, your expression conveying your confusion. It’s not something you had anticipated. It hasn’t even crossed your mind.

Angel nods, shamefully hanging his head. “Please, it’s either you or my dad.”

You bite your bottom lip, noticing how abashed he is to ask you this. Angel has always been so strong and independent that you never expected him to need you this much. Even when he was at his worst, drinking himself into oblivion, he has never turned up to your door asking for a place to stay. Not even once. He was always the one making sure you were alright. But you know the circumstances are different this time.

“Angel,” you begin, and the man sitting on your couch prepares for you to say no. “You know that you’re always welcome here.”

He sighs in relief, some of the tension disappearing from his muscles as he slumps down against the couch. He thanks you wordlessly with an appreciative nod of his head.

“What about your dad?” you inquire, meeting his tired brown eyes.

“It’s not that I don’t want to live with him, but he’s old, you know. He needs his sleep and I don’t wanna be a burden,” your friend explains. “Not that I’m not gonna be a burden to you but—”

You cut him off before he can doubt himself even more and try to explain something that doesn’t need to be explained. “No, no, Angel, you’re not a burden. Trust me,” you reassure him, “you and Maverick are more than welcome here.”

You know their company might help you too. You have been lonely lately more than ever. The nights seemed too long and restless as you kept overthinking every little thing—the guilt swallowing your whole being, drowning you in its darkness. You kept thinking day and night—what could you’ve done to save Luisa, what could you’ve done to take her place and die that night instead of her.

“I’m not sure where I’ll be in a few months. My lease is almost up. But for right now, and as long as you need it to be, my home is your home.” You look down at Maverick, who’s fallen asleep in your arms, the corner of your lips arching as you kiss his head softly.

A faint smile crosses Angel’s face as he watches the two of you together. It’s painful to know his mommy will never hold him like that again—will never kiss him like that again, but he cherishes the fact that at least you’re there for him and his son. You bring them the comfort—the love they need so desperately right now.

“I have a spare room.” Your voice breaks through Angel’s thoughts. His eyes follow you as you step toward the archway and nod your head in the direction of one of the doors across the corridor.

You can feel the nervousness radiating off him when he follows you. He’s uneasy at the prospect of crashing here, at your house. It’s not like he hasn’t been here before—he has—many times, sometimes with Luisa or Maverick and other times by himself, but he’s never spent the night.

“I don’t have a crib, but we can arrange something. Get the one from your house or get a new one,” you offer, opening the wooden door and stepping inside. You make a gesture with your hand to bring Angel’s attention to the room.

He looks around curiously. The room isn’t too fancy, but it’s cozy and bright. There’s a bed, a small dresser, and other minor furniture. The walls are a light blue color, with a few clouds painted onto them to give the feel of a dreamlike peace. You can tell that Angel likes it by the way he takes it all in with sparkling eyes, the corner of his mouth curving up.

“I can bring it. I planned on that,” he admits, scratching the back of his neck, embarrassed. “I knew you wouldn’t have those stuff.” He sets the bags down by the wall, the tips of his fingers trailing over one of the painted-on clouds.

Maverick fusses in his sleep, still cuddled up to your body. You hum softly, caressing his back. “He’s finally getting some good sleep,” you whisper, a smile crossing your face.

“He feels safe with you.”

Angel’s words are simple, but nevertheless, they stir something inside your heart. Something you’ve buried deep within a long time ago.

The two of you remain silent for a few more minutes. You take in the fact that your friend will be living with you, sharing your space—your mornings, evenings, and nights. The thought of it makes you feel peaceful in a way you haven’t felt before.

“We can take out the mattress from the bed frame and place it in the corner of the room,” you propose, making Angel look at you confused. You roll your eyes at him. “So Maverick doesn’t roll off the bed,” you explain further.

“Yeah, that’s smart,” he agrees, nodding his head at your idea. It feels like his mind is somewhere else.

Your eyes soften, and you giggle softly as the realization hits you. Angel’s head is in the clouds, almost literally. “Well, my hands are kinda busy, so you have to figure it out yourself.”

It takes your words a minute to reach the man. He shakes his head and looks at you, confused. You repeat the sentence, and Angel chuckles softly—the tension relieved by a bit of humor. Just like when you first met him, your heart can’t help but soften at the sight of his smile.

“Oh, you’re funny. Just wait until I’m holding Maverick,” he says, moving past you toward the bed.

He kneels down in front of it and tries to lift it up without success. You notice his struggle and almost let out a very unladylike snort, but you catch it at the last second, not wanting to wake the baby in your arms. Angel doesn’t look like he wants to ask you for help—his manly pride is not allowing it in this matter.

Knowing fully well he won’t be able to figure it out on his own—you decide to save him the embarrassment. “It’s attached to the bed frame. You have to reach underneath and pull the elastic loose,” you guide him, amusement in your eyes.

Angel listens to your instructions and reaches under the bed. He feels out the elastic and begins to pull at it. It takes some effort, but he’s successful in freeing the mattress. He straightens up and lifts it off the bed frame, placing it in the corner of the room.

His brown eyes look down at his little son, cuddled up in your arms. “He looks comfy,” he says softly. “He’s still asleep?”

You walk up to the mattress and place Maverick in the middle, the mattress barely dipping beneath his weight. “Sleeps like a rock. Just like his daddy.”

“So small,” Angel whispers quietly, his eyes glued to the boy’s tiny body—to his clenched fists and his small chest, rising with every steady breath, to his round pink cheeks and the little waves of his hair. His little miracle.

You look back at your friend, tears prickling in your eyes. You know you can both see so much of her in Maverick. The resemblance to his mommy was painfully evident. It was hard for both of you to look at his innocent face and be reminded of what you’ve lost.

Angel notices the tears threatening to escape your eyes. He feels responsible, knowing his presence has indirectly brought you to tears. “I’m sorry,” he apologizes in a whisper, his hand reaching out to gently caress your arm.

“No, I’m sorry. I know you’re hurting just as much as I do.” You wipe your tears away with the sleeve of your shirt. You stand straight, stepping out of Angel’s reach and nodding at him in appreciation.

“Do you want to get some rest? You look like hell,” you say, glancing at him.

He still hasn’t taken his kutte off; he looks exhausted and worn down. But he still refuses with a shake of his head. “Nah, I’m good.”

You know it’s a lie, but you don’t push.

“Come on, I will make us some tea.”

You walk into the kitchen, Angel rubbing his temples in an attempt to relieve the headache he caused himself by the lack of sleep and food. You take out two mugs from one of the cupboards above as your friend moves to lean on the counter beside you.

“How are you holding up?” He can easily guess the answer to this question, but he still lets it slip out of his mouth, concern in his voice.

You’ve known Luisa for years; you’ve known her before Angel has even joined her world. The lack of her quiet presence in your life is devastating—sometimes, it just makes you want to blow your brains out. But you know you wouldn’t be able to do that—not when you had people who still loved you and needed you there. And you know Angel is one of them; he cares about you probably more than he cares about himself. The two of you have grown much closer after Luisa’s death. In the span of those few days, you became each other’s lifelines.

“Just getting through, I guess... I miss her a lot.” You let out a deep sigh. “How are you holding up?”

“It’s been hard. Especially—” Angel pauses; he hesitates, unsure if it’s something he should share with anyone. He clears his throat, his voice breaking slightly. “Seeing him… It’s a constant reminder.”

You sense the pain in his words, the struggles he goes through every day. It kills you to hear it. You squeeze his hand in yours for a second, wordlessly showing him your support.

You can tell the conversation took its toll on Angel. He remains nearby, not wanting to leave your side. You fill the kettle and place it on the stove, turning around to lean against the counter next to your friend.

“I miss her,” the man admits; he wraps his tattooed arms around himself. “I still can’t believe she’s gone. I thought I was just dreaming.”

“It’s tough,” you nod in understanding.

“I always knew someday we would have to say goodbye. I always knew that,” Angel continues, his eyes gazing off into the distance. “But I didn’t think it would be so soon.”

He turns his attention to you. You can see that there are so many things he wants to get off his chest, but he doesn’t know where to start. You reach for his hand to hold it in yours, to comfort him. You wish you had the ability to make it all better, but there’s not much you can offer him.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles out, his voice so shy and quiet you can barely hear him. “I’m sorry that you have to be here for me when I’m like this.”

“I don’t have to do anything, Angel.” You squeeze his hand to make him look you in the eyes. “I want to be there for you.”

You watch as his eyes fill with so much love and gratitude. He looks like he wants to pull you close, hold you in his arms, and cry it all out. But he fights it, trying his best to stay afloat.

“I don’t know what I would do without you.”

“You’d be miserable by yourself. Now, at least you have some company,” you joke, trying to change the topic. It was starting to be too much; you could feel the darkness of guilt crawling up the walls of your brain. You couldn’t save her. You did nothing to save her.

[nerdygaymormon]

Favorite LGBTQ movie and TV quotes

“Um, I do drink red wine, but I also drink white wine. And I’ve been known to sample the occasional rosé. And a couple summers back, I tried a Merlot that used to be a Chardonnay, which got a bit complicated… I like the wine and not the label. Does that make sense?”

— David Rose, Schitt’s Creek, Season 1, Episode 10

“That felt so good to say. I feel like I just solved an escape room I’ve been trapped in my entire life.”

— Fabiola Torres, Never Have I Ever, Season 1, Episode 5

“Look, I’ll be hurt either way. Isn’t it better to be who I am?”

— Eric Effiong, Sex Education, Season 1, Episode 7

“Everybody’s story is different. There’s your version, and my version, and everything in between. But the one thing that all of those stories have in common is that moment right before you say those words when your heart is racing, and you don’t know what’s coming next. That moment’s really terrifying. And then once you say those words, you can’t unsay them. A chapter has ended, and a new one’s begun, and you have to be ready for that.”

— John, Happiest Season

“The good thing about being different is that no one expects you to be like them”

— Ellie Chu, The Half Of It

"When I'm with Brittany, I finally understand what people are talking about when they talk about love. I've tried so hard to push this feeling away, and keep it locked inside, but every day just feels like a war. I walk around so mad at the world, but I'm really just fighting with myself. I don't want to fight anymore. I'm just too tired. I have to just be me."

— Santana Lopez, Glee, Season 3, Episode 7

“Now, there is a long and honorable tradition in the gay community, and it has stood us in good stead for a very long time. When somebody calls you a name…you take it and own it.”

— Mark Ashton, Pride

“So I'm bisexual. So what? It's LGBTQ for a reason. There's a B in there and it doesn't mean Badass. Okay, it does, but it also means Bi.”

— Callie Torres, Grey's Anatomy, Episode 1105

“We’re standing here in Philadelphia, the, uh, City of Brotherly Love, the birthplace of freedom where the, uh, founding fathers authored the Declaration of Independence, and I don’t recall that glorious document saying anything about all straight men are created equal. I believe it says all men are created equal.”

— Joe Miller, Philadelphia

"Yes, I wear foundation. Yes, I live with a man. Yes, I'm a middle- aged fag. But I know who I am, Val. It took me twenty years to get here, and I'm not gonna let some idiot senator destroy that. F*** the senator, I don't give a damn what he thinks."

— Armand Goldman, The Birdcage

"Being gay is your thing. There are parts of it you have to go through alone. I hate that. As soon as you came out, you said, "Mom, I'm still me." I need you to hear this: You are still you, Simon. You are still the same son who I love to tease and who your father depends on for just about everything. And you're the same brother who always complements his sister on her food, even when it sucks. You get to exhale now, Simon. You get to be more you than you have been in... in a very long time. You deserve everything you want."

— Emily Spier, Love, Simon

"The greatest gift we can give each other is our authentic selves and sharing that. Sharing our truth is what will make us strong. So here I am. I am both human and alien. And I am a trans woman."

— Kara Danvers, Supergirl, Season 4, Episode 19

"But I feel more when I look at a picture of Kristen Stewart than I do when I kiss him."

— Elena Alvarez, One Day at a Time,

"You can’t change it. You can’t fix me. Because I’m not broken, I don’t need to be fixed, OK? I’m me!"

— Ian Gallagher, Shameless, Season 5, Episode 12

"Becoming me was the greatest creative project of my life."

Eliot Waugh, The Magicians, Season 1, Episode 1

"Every time someone steps up and says who they are, the world becomes a better, more interesting place. So, thank you."

—Raymond Holt, Brooklyn Nine-Nine, Season 5, Episode 10

"I might be…bisexual, and you guys know I hate labels, but this one feels important right now to own the space I’m in and to make sense of it."

—Kat Edison, The Bold Type

[nightskywonderer]

Superman And Wonder Woman's Love Makes Perfect Sense — The Magnetic Attraction Between High Testosterone Men And High Estrogen Women Explained

Superman and Wonder Woman's romance may be fictional, but attraction between men with high testosterone and women with high estrogen is real.

Some things are meant to be — like Superman and Wonder Woman falling in love. Ever wonder why that is? Turns out, there's science behind this magnetism between high-testosterone males and high-estrogen females that makes Superman and Wonder Woman's romance more than just a fictional story.

Superman is the high-testosterone savior writ large.

An acute sense of justice and fairness are traits linked with the testosterone system in the brain. So Superman’s affiliation with the “Justice League of America” is an immediate tipoff to his personality type: a high-testosterone male, what I call the Director. He also looks like a Director.

Testosterone builds muscle—one of Superman’s outstanding traits. His angular jaw, high cheekbones, thin lips, and heavy brow ridges are also carved by testosterone. Oddly, these physical traits also signal his invulnerability—at least his imperviousness to disease. Testosterone is a caustic substance that jeopardizes the immune system; only men with a very strong immune system can tolerate high levels of this male hormone. Superman is among them.

Most importantly, this “Man of Steel” saves people he doesn’t know. Known as ‘heroic altruism,’ this willingness to confront severe danger to save a stranger is linked with elevated levels of testosterone. Directors want to be needed, to help, to “fix” the problems of the world. Superman personifies this primordial male role: the protector.

Wonder Woman exudes qualities built by estrogen.

She's what I call the Negotiator. This type is compassionate and nurturing; they seek peace and harmony, as Wonder Woman does. And I’m not surprised that she can talk to the animals.

Estrogen is linked with verbal skills, intuition, and the ability to read faces, postures, gestures, and tone of voice. All evolved to enable women to communicate with pre-verbal infants, even animals. Wonder Woman has these elevated estrogen qualities in spades.

Yet Wonder Woman is no doormat. She is highly independent, like many women. Moreover, with her social skills, she can be cunning. And she will fight. Indeed, when protecting their young, women can become far more dangerous than just about any man.

Wonder Woman seems to regard all good humans as her children. It is this genuine warrior spirit within a beautiful, tender-hearted woman that makes her the embodiment of all high-estrogen women–and a mythic creature to most men.

Superman and Wonder Woman are a classic match, the very high testosterone male and the very high estrogen female.

And they have many cultural and biological traits that will fuel their romance. People tend to fall in love with those of the same background.

Although Superman comes from a different planet, while Wonder Woman harks from an isolated island, both are aliens to our modern world. Both also have superhuman powers so each will understand the other’s strengths–including their mutual ability to fly. More importantly, Superman and Wonder Woman share the same values and goals–essentials to a good relationship.

They are both dedicated to truth and justice; both dislike wasting time on irrelevant, trivial, or boring matters; and both fight evil to save the good—traits shared by both the high testosterone and high estrogen types. Moreover, both value personal autonomy.

Each will find someone who is just as independent as themselves.

If their first kiss is novel and exciting, it might push Superman and Wonder Woman over the threshold toward falling in love.

A kiss is just a kiss? No way! A great first kiss can be thrilling—and trigger feelings of intense romantic love, due to the way the brain responds to novelty. Any kind of unique situation triggers the dopamine system. And dopamine is associated with feelings of romance.

The first kiss could also trigger sexual desire. Saliva has traces of testosterone, and men regularly like sloppier kisses, perhaps to transfer some of this male hormone and heighten the woman’s sexual response. Moreover, a woman’s breath and saliva change across her menstrual cycle, so with his sloppier kisses, a man may also be unconsciously trying to pick up this subtle hint of her fertility.

Is Superman a sloppy kisser? Perhaps we’ll find out.

In fact, the first kiss can be dangerous. In a study of 58 men and 122 women, 59% of men and 66% of women said that they had ended a romance after the first kiss. It was the kiss of death. Because as you kiss, you can see your partner clearly, as well as smell, taste, hear, and feel them.

Instantly these messages from your senses are picked up by five of your twelve cranial nerves and escorted directly to the brain. Here they detonate, providing vivid data about the person’s health, their eating, drinking, and smoking habits, and their state of mind–whether they are rough and impatient or tender and calm.

But if Superman and Wonder Woman like their first kiss, and turn into lovers, their kisses may trigger even deeper feelings for one another. Kissing among long-term partners raises oxytocin activity in the brain, producing feelings of trust and attachment.

Kissing a familiar partner also reduces the stress hormone, cortisol, contributing to this brain bath of pleasure, connection, and relaxation.

So kissing can trigger any one of three basic brain systems that humanity has evolved for mating and reproduction: romantic love, the sex drive, and/or feelings of deep attachment. And as Superman and Wonder Woman have their first kiss, they embark on one of Nature’s oldest—and most exciting–journeys.

But even Superman and Wonder Woman will have their problems.

She is a warrior, ready to kill her foes; he has killed and resolved never to kill again. Neither is likely to understand this fundamental difference in values.

Nevertheless, this is a natural complementary match.

Directors such as Superman want a mate who has the strength of character to stand up to their formidable personality. In Wonder Woman, the charming warrior, he has found his match. And in Superman, Wonder Woman will find a truly “good man.

Written by Helen Fisher Ph.D., a biological anthropologist and Senior Research Fellow at The Kinsey Institute and Chief Scientific Advisor to the dating site Match. She is the author of the book The Anatomy of Love: A Natural History of Mating, Marriage, and Why We Stray, among other titles.

[cantorpike]

Dear Friend,

When I was a teenager, I told my dad I wanted to be an actor. In response, he gave me the only piece of advice he ever offered me—“Learn to play the accordion.” And he was serious. He said, “You can always make a living with an accordion.”

Because I ignored his advice, I never found out if he was right. Instead, I’ve lived 80 creative years pursuing acting and photography, and working as a director and poet.

If I had listened to my father, and hadn’t done any of those things, chances are you wouldn’t have recognized my name and you wouldn’t be reading this. Now that you are, I’d like to ask you to consider what I have to say. I reach out to you as someone who is troubled to see the conflict between Israelis and Palestinians continue apparently without an end in sight.

In fact, there is an end in sight. It’s known as the two-state solution—a secure, democratic Israel as the Jewish State alongside an independent Palestinian state. Even Israel’s nationalist Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu, has come to see this as the shape of the future. The problem is how to reach that end point. It’s something we should be concerned about—not only as world citizens, but as Americans.

You might recall the episode in the original Star Trek series called, “Let That Be Your Last Battlefield.” Two men, half black, half white, are the last survivors of their peoples who have been at war with each other for thousands of years, yet the Enterprise crew could find no differences separating these two raging men.

But the antagonists were keenly aware of their differences—one man was white on the right side, the other was black on the right side. And they were prepared to battle to the death to defend the memory of their people who died from the atrocities committed by the other.

The story was a myth, of course, and by invoking it I don’t mean to belittle the very real issues that divide Israelis and Palestinians. What I do mean to suggest is that the time for recriminations is over. Assigning blame over all other priorities is self-defeating. Myth can be a snare. The two sides need our help to evade the snare and search for a way to compromise.

This is the message that Americans for Peace Now seeks to spread. I’m a strong supporter of APN and the work it does. It is a leading voice for Americans who support Israel and know that a negotiated peace will ensure Israel’s security, prosperity, and continued viability as a Jewish and democratic state.

The Middle East is only getting more tumultuous. The upheavals throughout the region show that what happens in the Middle East can’t help but affect us in the United States. This year, we’ve seen oil prices rise sharply and America become involved militarily in Libya. The cost to American lives and our economy continues to rise at a time when unemployment and deficits are sapping our country’s strength.

“If we can solve the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, then that will make it easier for Arab states and the Gulf states to support us when it comes to issues like Iraq and Afghanistan. It will also weaken Iran, which has been using Hamas and Hezbollah as a way to stir up mischief in the region.”

Those are the words of candidate Barack Obama in 2008. And although they’re just as accurate today, time has not stood still.

We’ve also seen a marked increase in violence: a Jewish family was murdered in the West Bank and a woman was killed in a bus bombing in Jerusalem. A rocket attack on southern Israel from the Hamas-controlled Gaza Strip resulted in a school bus being hit and a teen died of his wounds. Israel, in turn, has retaliated. We need strong American leadership now to pivot from the zero-sum mentality of violence to an attitude that focuses on the parties shared interests: security and prosperity.

If you’ve learned something from this letter, I’ve succeeded in my preliminary task. Now I ask for your support to continue APN’s educational efforts in this country—to spread the message that there is a peace solution, and to let Congress and the White House know it’s preferable for America to be part of the solution than to be drawn into another conflict.

There is a sizable number of influential voices in Israel saying the same thing. In April, a group of 50 prominent Israelis, including the former heads of the Mossad (Israel’s CIA), the Shin Bet (its FBI), and the military, issued a call for two states for two nations. Their plan includes a Palestinian state alongside Israel with agreed-upon land swaps. The Palestinian-populated areas of Jerusalem would become the capital of Palestine; the Jewish-populated areas the capital of Israel.

These experts are not naïve. They know that even if the Palestinian pragmatists of Fatah reconcile with Hamas, there will be extremists who will try to sabotage any future peace deal. They know how to deal with violent extremists. These people were entrusted with Israel’s security and are saying that the work they did alone isn’t enough to bring Israel security. We cannot know yet what this unification of Hamas with Fatah means and we have to wait and see what emerges. Regardless, the principle of establishing two independent states, one Jewish and the other Palestinian, is still critical in this region for both Israel and the Palestinian people. That is the goal, to support the rational and moderate course.

Their action plan echoes the 348 senior Israeli reserve army officers and combat soldiers who came together in 1978 to urge their government to sign a peace treaty with Egypt. They formed Shalom Achshav, Israel’s Peace Now movement which APN provides nearly 50 percent of their funding.

Peace Now’s activities and programs—such as Settlement Watch, the ongoing monitoring of settlement construction on the West Bank—keeps peace on the world’s agenda. Peace Now gathers and publishes detailed information on settlements and is widely cited in Israeli and international media as the foremost authority on settlements. Peace Now is likewise well known for mobilizing demonstrations and organizing grassroots pro-peace activities. Innovations include an interactive online map of the settlements, “Facts on the Ground,” also available as an app for iPhone and iPad developed by APN applying Peace Now’s courageous work.

Like those Israelis who issued the peace plan, the members of Peace Now have their boots on the ground. They serve in Israel’s military reserves and see every day what life is like without a negotiated peace with the Palestinians.

That’s why I’m a supporter of APN and Peace Now.

I hope you’ll join me, and lend your voice to the influential and credible peace lobby that exists here as well as in Israel. Please give the tax-deductible contribution you can afford.

Dare I say it? It’s the logical thing to do.

Leonard Nimoy

5/11/2011

[namorslutfanfiction]

Ok so I’ve not seen narcos Mexico which is basically a sin at this point but I am obsessed with Rafa!!! So he’s obviously such a soft sweet lil baby boy so I was thinking what if he met a woman who was strong and sassy and also into *cough cough* gardening *cough* and he just melts for her but she’s a hard to get maybe cos they’re rivals and she has a reputation to uphold being a strong independent woman ??? Maybe some smut with them giving into the attraction ??? Idk I’m just excited I want to keep requesting stuff cos I love your writing. Also I think the power dynamic would be such a twist cos tenoch/namor just scream daddy to me but Rafa screams soft sub baby with a big old praise kink amongst other kinks 😂

Oh rafa is our baby and definitely wants to be used.

Summary: Rafa loved women. Rafa loved weed. Now he found a woman who loves weed just like he does. And he is immediately down bad

disclaimer: I smoke, I have no idea how it's grown. so I'm making shit up.

drug use, fluff, smut.

"Comportarse," Felix shot at Rafa as the door to his office opened. Rafa smirked at him and lit his blunt. Felix had said he was meeting with a supplier who insisted on being seen. Rafa was certain who ever this pendejo was, that their weed couldn't hold a candle to his, but he had shown up because Felix had asked. But if the guy said the wrong thing then he'd shoot him, but Felix didn't need to know that.

When the first man walked through the door, Felix stood to shake his hand but he refused, "Yo no soy el que estás esperando. Es ella."

The henchman stepped aside as the real guest arrived. Rafa and Felix watched you walk in the door. Felix schooled his surprise and greeted you cordially. Rafa on the other hand was instantaneously smitten. You weren't dressed to the nines like Sofia and her like. Instead you wore jeans that hugged your curves, worn in boots, and a loose button down that had the sleeves rolled up. You hair was braided back but had little bits of frizz from the humidity. You were beautiful.

Rafa didn't hear a word as you and Felix talked. He was wondering why Felix hadn't introduced him. He was wondering why you were ignoring him, you hadn't even spared him a glance. The narco heard the words "Es una nueva variedad de marihuana."

That wasn't possible, no one had made a new strain except him, at least there in Mexico. Felix looked angry, not used to a woman being so frank and aggressive with him. You slammed a paper on the table, pointing out numbers that Rafa didn't care to understand.

"The system you built is a monopoly! You ruined the livelihood of my field, pendejo. No one will work with me because you supposedly have the best in the market. But mine is better," You screeched at the slick leader.

"You're pretty confident for such an insolent witch," Felix shot back, he pointed at Rafa, "His work is better than anyone's and I bet my life and this entire business on that. You can't compete so don't try."

Rafa's eyes were wide when you turned and glared at him. You whipped your head back to Felix, "What this joto? I'm supposed to believe he has any smarts in that rat's nest of hair?"

For some reason that set Felix off and he stood and raised his hand to slap her. Rafa moved on instinct, pointing his gun and cocking it at Felix. Felix was stunned out of his anger, "Qué chingados?"

Realizing what he had just done he pointed the gun at you, "Vete a la chingada."

You smirked at him then turned to Felix, "You've got some real idiots working for you."

"Pinche pendejo," Felix growled at Rafa then sat back down in his seat. Rafa followed, trying to hide his embarrassment. He focused on the blunt that he had let burn down half way without taking enough hits. He resigned himself to getting higher and examining your curves and the confident smirk on your face. When you got up and left the room, Felix turned around and smacked Rafa hard against the side of his head.

"What the hell is wrong with you cabron? She was talking shit and you pull a gun on me?" Felix looked incredulous.

"Who was that, Felix? How come you didn't introduce me? When is she coming back?" Rafa rattled off, jumping up from his seat on the couch.

"No mames, guey. Already? She didn't even look at you," Felix shook his head, of course Rafa the lover boy was thinking with his dick.

Before Felix could stop him, Rafa ran out of the office and tried to beat you to the lobby. But when he got there he was just barely able to see you being driven off in a pick up truck.

...

"The only reason you're here is because I want to knock her down a peg or two. She's arrogant and needs us to show her that. Other cartels would not be so nice after she came in here acting like a maldita bruja," Felix explained as he paced with a cigarette in his mouth.

"There's no way she has anything worth anything, but I'd like to make sure she knows that," Rafa said, feigning interest in the business side of things.

"Don't fuck around, Rafa," Felix grasped him by the back of his neck, "She's young, but she's smart. We can use her later so don't scare her off."

The doors opened and you were once more preceded by your henchman. Once again you were dressed casually, and you took a seat across from Felix. You noticed Rafa standing behind Felix, but didn't greet him. "You want to make a deal or not?"

"I don't need your weed. But I might need those ideas you have. I had Rafa look over them and he thinks they are promising but so far unproven," Felix explained, gesturing to the narco behind him. You noticed the hungry look from Rafa, and smirked. He was an easy book to read.

"I can prove them, just give me time and financial support. There will be a more potent strain ready for the market in a year," You replied confidently.

"We will see. You will go with Rafa to our field. For security you have to be blind folded once you get to a certain point. Rafa will be able to tell me if you're the real deal or not. If you're not then I suggest you back out of this business before you get killed. If you are then we may have use for you. This is your only chance, chiquita. Make use of it," Felix finished with such a sense of foreboding that you weren't sure how to reply. He stood and buttoned his suit jacket, "If you'll excuse me I have a comandante to talk to. Rafa, take care of her."

Then the lead narco was out the door to deal with supposedly more important duties. You eyed Rafa, taking in his open shirt, flamboyant fashion sense, and fluffy hair. He was kind of cute in an arrogant idiot kind of way. You reached your hand out to him to properly introduce yourself. He smiled at you and kissed your hand, "Hola, Rafael Caro Quintero. La princesa me puede llamar Rafa."

His smile was unbelievably charming and you couldn't help but laugh at how obviously attracted he was to you, "Well Rafa, take me to this so called 'best of the best' marijuana."

...

Rafa personally drove you to the field. On the way there he was explaining his process and asking you questions about your own. The chemistry was palpable as you finished each others sentences. You talked about similar experiments and different ideas you both had to create different strains and up the potency.

It was hot and the both of you were laughing and sweating. You had to admit, the man knew his weed. His dark skin looked delicious in the bright sun and the trickle of sweat down his neck was distracting. You noticed him pull the car off the side of the road then reach into the back for a strip of thick cloth.

"It's time then?" You asked, knowing that secrecy was important.

"Turn around, princesa, I'll put it on for you," Rafa said, looking apologetic. The already long drive had allowed you to bond over your shared interest.

"Don't tie it too tight," You requested as you turned your back to him.

"I'll be gentle," Rafa whispered, making a shiver run down your neck. His hands were warm as he moved your hair out of the way and gently placed the cloth over your eyes and knotted it behind your head. His hands rested for a moment on your shoulders and all you could hear was him taking a deep breath. "You can turn around now."

You did just that, reaching out blindly to face the front of the car again. Rafa took your wrist, making you jerk. "Calmate, I just want to show you where the middle is so you know where you're facing."

Rafa placed your hand at the edge of your seat, touching the middle console. It took you a moment to get comfortable with the loss of sight as the narco started the car and continued the journey to the fields.

After a moment of silence you spoke, "Don't kill me in the middle of the desert, please. At least not before I come up with that strain I told you about."

That made Rafa laugh. The sound was warm and infectious. You felt him take your hand, "No, hermosa, no one will touch you. It's been a long time since I've met someone who knew weed the way I do."

You were surprised at the affection, and even more surprised that you welcomed it. But you felt the same. Especially as a woman, you had never felt understood by anyone about your affinity for the plant, until now. This flashy narco was matching you move for move, and it was exciting.

...

Rafa told you to keep the blindfold on as he guided you to the actual field after he had parked the car. It didn't escape you that this felt more like a romantic surprise rather than a test of skills. You could hear the sounds of workers, and from the breeze you were definitely on flat lands. The smell of the fresh plant was in the air, and to the side you could tell there were kilos of it drying for transport.

Rafa guided you gently and then placed your hands on what you immediately knew to be a large marijuana plant. You immediately stepped forward and pushed your noise into the buds. There was silence as you took it in, already coming up with information at a mile a minute.

"What can you tell me?" Rafa asked. Then you were off, talking about the notes, the potency, the maturity and when it would be ready to harvest. There was silence and you hesitated.

"Rafa," You worried about bruising his ego, but reminded yourself this was a test, "There's something wrong with this one. Everything is fine except there's a weird syrup smell at the end. Something too sweet. It would smell awful once you burn it."

You felt him approach you and you immediately went into a defensive stance.

"I'm not going to hurt you, princesa. I'm just going to untie the blindfold," Rafa's voice was amused.

When you opened your eyes it was too bright to see. You shielded your eyes waiting for them to adjust. Eventually you could make out Rafa's smiling face. "So how did I do?"

"Eres brillante!" Rafa exclaimed, "I test all my men this way. All of them and you were the only one to catch the mistake. I purposely have those three plants that are no good. No one has caught it yet, but you."

You fought the urge to smile, "Well of course. I told you. I know what I'm doing."

You glanced behind him, taking in the watch tower and different sheds. The irrigation system and the people working and roaming. You realized that the field must be behind you.

"You can look, princesa, I think you'll like what you see," Rafa said as he guided you to turn around.

You felt your eyes grow wide as you took in the sheer size. You stepped back as you tried to take in the full scope. But it went off in all directions, as far as the eye could see. It was beautiful.

"Rafa," You turned to the man smiling at you, "This is insane. Incredible. How many acres? How many plants? What's the yield? Do you have then maturing progressively or all at once? How many kilos are you putting out?"

"Slow down, princesa. Would you like to see more of it?" Rafa asked. You nodded, unable to hide your glee. You didn't care about appearing tough or strong. This was your 'kid in a candy store' moment. Rafa took your hand and led you into the fields.

Hours went by as you walked the fields, ignoring the heat or the fact that you were walking around with someone who should be a rival. Instead you were having the time of your life. His system was pretty self sustaining but you were able to make suggested that made his eyes light up and his laugh explode. Rafa was growing on you like a literally weed.

...

The next day Rafa reported back to Felix, singing your praises.

"You should have seen it, cabron! She knew exactly what was wrong with it. She figured out the irrigation issue I had for months. I have never met anyone who could understand the nuances and delicacy of those plants," Rafa was giddy and Felix was amused.

"So I should back her?" Felix asked, although he figured he knew the answer.

"No," Rafa said, a smirk on his face. "No, whatever she comes up with won't work without the space and work I have already done. She's mine. Buy her out and she will work on the fields with me. Give her whatever she asks, but make sure she works with me, and no one else."

The possessiveness didn't surprise Felix, it was to be expected of the narco who fell fast and hard to the point of lunacy. "She's not going to like that, Rafa. You ready for her to fight you on that?"

"She'll come to me. Remember Felix, as long as her people are taken care of, then all she'll want to do is work on the weed," Rafa said, taking a long draw from his blunt.

"Tomorrow, I'll buy her out. But I want that new strain in 10 months not a year, Rafa. I need it before anyone else comes up with something better," Felix reminded him.

"No one has ever come up with anything better than me. But this, if we work together. This will be our masterpiece," Rafa had a faraway look on his smug face making Felix shake his head.

"Just make sure it's on the market by my deadline. I don't care if you fuck her with it. Make it happen," Felix dismissed Rafa.

...

"You're an ass," You immediately punched Rafa as hard as you could in the stomach. You had been dropped off at his mansion with the orders to stick to him like glue or be killed by Felix himself. "I would have been fine working with you but having that bastard leash me to you is not an attractive arrangement, pendejo."

Rafa waved off Chapo and Cuco who were ready to shoot you for attacking their boss. The narco in question was dressed as usual and laughing. "Your family is taken care of right? That was the most important thing, now the next important thing is working on that strain."

He came up to you and grabbed your jaw, "Together, we can do that. Together, we can do a lot of things."

You hated that you were turned on, "You shouldn't have forced me, Rafa. I don't like being forced."

"Then you can leave if you want. We can work on it together but you don't need to stay, I won't force you," Rafa challenged, his voice soft as he spoke close to you. The smoke from his mouth surrounding you was heady. He released your jaw, "Chapo, take her back."

Rafa turned but you called out, "Rafa. Shut up, pendejo, you know I'm going to stay."

You grabbed your bag and brushed past him into the sprawling mansion. You heard him laugh as he rushed to catch up to you and show you your room. You found it difficult to keep your surly attitude in the face of his excited ramblings.

...

It took 6 months to get the strain perfected and by the end of the 10 month deadline it was debuted. The mansion was partying and high as a kite. Debauchery was everywhere and the handles of liquor and packs of cocaine that Felix had sent as congratulations were being parsed out to the party goers.

You had no interest in partying with the boys and their sluts. You were up on your balcony, watching the pool from above. The band was loud and the people louder. There were people swimming naked in the pool, the area stank of weed, and you could see Neto and Cuco snorting lines through a window.

You didn't like coke, didn't like how fast it made your heart beat and your mind move. You preferred the mellow relaxation that the right strain of weed gave you. You crossed that with tequila and you were floating in your own little world, with a smile on your face.

The last 10 months had been invigorating. Working with Rafa was like working with a ball of pure energy. He was far more intelligent than he let on, reserving it for his treasured plants. You had met your match in that field. Someone you could genuinely bounce ideas off of and experiment with. He was charming, funny, and caring to a fault.

You were surprised he hadn't made a move, but you suspected that Felix had something to do with that. Maybe a threat about the deadline and not fucking around. It was disappointing and frustrating.

Rafa was fucking around, just with some rich chick named Sofia who rubbed you the wrong way and made you want to shoot her through the eyes. But she hadn't been around in the last few months, and Rafa had been ranting about how much of a spoiled bitch she was. You hadn't seen her at the party and were more than thankful that you didn't have to fight the urge to vomit if she had arrived.

There was a knock at your bedroom door and you called for them to come in. It was Rafa. He stood in the middle of your room apprehensive. In his hands he held a handle of tequila and two glasses. "Ay guey. I was going to invite you to share a drink with me."

You looked at the soft expression and could tell he hadn't had any coke. He hadn't since Sofia had left. At most he was high from his own plant and looking to get crossed like you. You looked at him, all of him. Rafa's hair was perfectly fluffy, jewelry draped on his dark skin, and wearing a silk shirt that was open too low. You felt heat pool between your legs.

For months you had been touching yourself to the thought of him. You had laid jealous in your bed when you knew he was with Sofia. And now here he was looking pathetic and ready to be eaten. He'd made you wait long enough.

"Rafa, is Sofia gone for good?" You asked as you walked back into the room and closed the balcony doors. You held your own handle of unfinished tequila and swung it lazily in your hand.

Rafa scoffed at the question, "That bitch is dead to me. Has been for months."

You could see him watching you. His eyes roved your body and there was a hungry look in them. You were wearing a silk robe, a gift from him a few months ago on your birthday. There was nothing underneath it.

"Is that why you wanted to have a drink with me? Because she's not around anymore?" You asked, taking a swig from your handle.

"What? No. I don't care about her. This celebration is for us. We did what we planned and now we are going to be richer and so far above any competitor that they will never reach us. This is all thanks to you," Rafa said, looking actually offended that you suggested otherwise.

You smiled at him then. The high was making you reckless, and the alcohol was making you hot. But the way Rafa looked at you was making you wet. You took another swig from our handle and approached Rafa. You locked eyes with him and put your hand on his chest.

His breathing quickened as you pushed him to sit on the end of your bed. You gripped his jaw, ran your thumb across his bottom lip, coaxing his mouth open. With one more glance at him, you spit the tequila into his mouth slowly, and he drank it. You locked eyes as he took the last drop and then you grabbed his hair and kissed him roughly.

Rafa whimpered into the kiss as you wrapped a hand around his throat and devoured him. His kisses were as intoxicating as the tequila. Months of unanswered desire came flooding out as he pulled you to him and thrust his tongue into your mouth. He tasted of the weed you had both spent months working on together.

The hours and days spent together had left you wanting more from him. But at every turn, at every lingering touch, and held glance he pulled away from you. He had always hesitated but in the end would put space between you. Your frustration at the memory got the better of you and you found his jaw again and pushed him away.

"You're such an idiot you know that? You could have had me naked in your bed for months. You could have had me on my knees or across your lap, but you kept pulling away, like you hadn't thought about it since the day I walked into Felix's office and you lost the ability to breathe," You blurted out. You regretted it, not wanting him to know just how desperate you had been.

But Rafa's gaze softened, his grip around your waist tightened, "Felix told me not to fuck around with you. Not until the strain was ready. The only reason I was with Sofia again was because I needed a release because I couldn't have you. Sofia left me because I called out your name the last time we fucked."

It took you a moment to take in what he said, then you laughed. Laughter fueled by your high and the alcohol. "You brat, you called out my name while you fucked her? No wonder she was so mad."

"It's the only way I could get off. I had to think about you, imagine I was inside your wet pussy," His vulgar admission was met with another desperate kiss from you. You pulled moans from him as your hand travelled downward and palmed his hard on. When you were satisfied that he was as needy as you felt you pulled away.

"Get naked, Rafa. Let's see if all that fucking I heard was as good as it sounded, or if that Sofia bitch was just a good actor," You jabbed, as you untied the robe and dropped it to the floor.

Rafa stopped for a moment with his shirt in his hands as he finally laid eyes on your naked form. He completely lost any comeback he had in mind as he took in the sight of your supple skin and curves. "Te ves deliciosa."

You got impatient and placed a palm on his chest. You pushed him on to the bed then went to work at removing his boots and jeans. When his cock was out and weeping you fought the urge to take it into your mouth. That was for another time. This was about you getting yours. You looked at Rafa as you lay next to him, stroking his cock playfully.

"Rafa, you need to make up for leaving me so wet all the time," You purred into his ear before sucking on his earlobe. He moaned softly and nodded. "How are you gonna do that, baby boy?"

He didn't even react to the name, just looked at you with eyes that begged to be bossed around, "Whatever you want, princesa?"

"Are you going to make me ride you or are you going to fuck me into this bed until I cum onto your cock a few times?" You asked, tracing circled along his chest, leaving his weeping cock unattended. You were fighting the urge to straddle him and slide him inside you.

"Yes, princesa," He replied, as a whimper escaped his lips as you tongued his nipple impulsively. You'd been dying to do that since the first time you had seen him with his shirt hanging open.

"Fuck me, Rafa. Be a good boy and make me cum," You moaned softly as you guided his hand to your wet cunt.

Rafa let out a feral noise once he felt just how wet you were. In a swift move you were beneath him, hands pinned above your head, and his cock pushing into your pussy. You arched against him, "Yes, baby, just like that."

He thrust into your center, hard and deep. You knew he was going to be thick but you were surprised by how deeply he thrust into you. You saw stars after months of pining. This man was a drug of his own and you knew you were going to become addicted. His lips found yours again and he allowed you to wrap your arms around his shoulders. Rafa angled your hips, wrapping your legs around him as he pounded into you.

Your first orgasm came so fast you couldn't even warn him. Your nerve endings were exploding with pleasure as he kissed and fucked and sucked every part of you. Your hands found his hair and pulled at it, making him moan into your lips. You kept your foreheads together as you encouraged him, "Yes, Rafa. You're fucking me so good. You like how my pussy feels don't you? Is this what you were imagining when you fucked that bitch? I bet you never fucked her like this."

The adoration in Rafa's eyes only grew with each word you spoke. Something about your words spurred him on. He leaned back and rubbed your clit with his thumb as he continued thrusting into your dripping wet pussy. Even his grunts sounded soft and needy. You reached forward and tweaked your own nipples. The sight made him throw his head back in ecstasy.

"Princesa, eres tan perfecta," Rafa moaned as you clenched down on him with your second orgasm. This time you felt yourself squirt a little and he did to. He fucked you even faster as you came.

You were panting now, sure that Rafa was close. But he proved you wrong and flipped you over onto your stomach. The narco gripped your hips and thrust into you, impossibly deeper than before. You grabbed at the bed sheets as the room filled with the loud slap of his hips against your round ass. "Fuck, Rafa. You're so deep, you're gonna make me cum again aren't you? You really want to please me don't you?"

Between grunts of exertion he replied, "Yes, princesa, I'll make you cum again."

He sucked and licked your shoulder and neck before biting down and lifting your hips higher so he could thrust at a different angle. Rafa didn't let up as he continued his pounding rhythm. His arm came around to put you in a loose headlock. "Cum for me, Princesa. Milk me dry."

You sobbed as you came, the pleasure so overwhelming you would have thought you blacked out but you still felt the stuttering of Rafa's hips as he filled your pussy with his cum. Both of you were out of breath, the room smelled of sex and weed, and you both started giggling.

Rafa broke down next to you, giggling as he pulled you into his side, placing fluttering kisses all over your face between breaths. You also giggled, high on pleasure, weed, and Rafa.

"You're mine now, Rafa," You spoke against his lips.

"I've always been yours," He answered back.

....

Okay, I love rafa so much wtf.

reblog, review, reply, my chiquitins.

[colourstreakgryffin]

Hi-hi!! Could I request yandere head cannons for Rengoku, sanemi, tengen, anddd Mitsuri? I was thinking with a reader whose like a really big feminist? Like she advocates for women's rights all the way, and if she would listen to music it would be like Bikini Kill, Bratmobile, etc..? Thank you for your time💗💗

Why yea, happy to try this out! The four will be seperate for my own sanity! Won’t deny, a little tough to write but hope all my glass angels enjoy this!

Yandere! Rengoku Kyojuro

Just the way you fearlessly tell him to stop underestimating you because you’re a woman. He adores your dedication to women’s rights and it flares his heart to life!

And he agrees with you about everything you detail on women’s struggles. Goddamn, he is a hardcore feminist(alongside Sanemi) too. But, he’ll only drop anybody who tries to push you down, not every other woman

Yandere! Kyojuro doesn’t change much in all honesty. He is a little bit more forward and confident in making his social approach clearly further passive-aggressive. He’ll shoo away people as he wants to keep your movement rolling for your happiness

Even if he understands that you’re capable of fighting independently, it doesn’t mean he’ll let you risk your life. He is still protective and clingy as Yandere Kyojuro always is, your life is the most important thing to him

Kyojuro may get a bit more aggressive towards you as well since you fight back against his rules firmly. You don’t want any man, even the one you did like, to control you

He sadly does, he controls you. But not because he wants you to submit to the offensive, forced traditional women roles but because he wants to wed you up and make you his forever

So he’ll do everything he possibly can to prevent you from running into battle and keep you safe in the Flame Estate. Kyojuro doesn’t care what crazy length he has to go to, he’ll have the love of his life by all means necessary

“Why yes, I’d never view you as inferior to me, rose. You are incredible, no doubt but I can’t stand letting you get hurt. I need you to stay here, where it’s safe and warm and you get all of my burning heart!”

Yandere! Shinazugawa Sanemi

He was blown away. You barked at him for insisting he can handle the demon himself, informing him you’re not weak because you’re a woman and request he treats you with respect. Sanemi’s heart exploded on that day

Sanemi apologises for every potentially offensive thing he’s ever said to you and during each fight you two share, he sits back. Though from the sidelines, he is fuming with concerned-mixed-rage as you fight independently like the powerful woman you are!

He is a hardcore feminist and loves women, those traditional roles disgust him. And post Yandere corruption, this passionate disgust is tripled. He’ll behave like your second-in-charge feminist and demand people treat you equally

Truthfully, like Kyojuro, Mitsuri and Tengen, Yandere Sanemi doesn’t really change much. But, he gladly gets into arguments over women’s rights for you, you rely on him to spread the word and he’ll do anything to make you happy

Sanemi is possessive and protective but he isn’t really controlling, he won’t try stop you from fighting demons, but he’ll most likely kill your enemies behind your back. He doesn’t mind spilling blood for his strong woman

He is subtle about his requests. He wants you to stay at the Wind Estate but he’ll never blankly say to your face, you’ll retaliate so he uses good ol’ fashion mind-twisting to convince you to come over willingly… for longer than a few hours

Sanemi hates how angry you are at him for forcing you to live with him, against your will but it won’t stop him from loving you and how he expresses his affection is scary. You will grow to feel betrayed and conflicted towards him for trying to take over your life. You thought he was different…

“I’m not trying to make you submit to me, Dokusha! I’m trying to keep you safe, even if you can fight! You’re in danger and I love you too much to let you die, please! Just let me help! My one and only”

Yandere! Uzui Tengen

Tengen loves women power. Thanks to his wives, he is all for that feminist cause. His interest in it was amped when he met you. You kindly turned down his assistance for your injury, proclaiming you can take care of yourself without a man well

He’s always loved independent women and the way you act, deep in your women rights mindset, has him floating. He, like most the Yanderes here, defends you in arguments but will gladly stand down when you ask

Yandere! Tengen doesn’t really change much, as suspected. All that he does is he advocates for your cause more openly and gets hyper-aggressive in fight mode against everybody, no matter what

Even if he is supportive, his Yandere tendencies aren’t nonexistent. His slick gaslighting and manipulation is the biggest player, he is very good at tricking you to spend more time at the Sound Estate and keep you liking him

That facade will drop eventually, Tengen grows clingy and possessive over you. Nobody hurts his strong woman but he wants his fourth wife’s attention all the time. He actually gets jealous that you care so much about women’s rights, over him

Tengen is a bit terrifying and invasive, he’ll make sure he is apart of everything you do and he will propose to you at one point, everytime you say no, makes him more determined to marry you

He won’t strip away all of your developed rights but he will spin your view into believing he is the right man for you and everything he says is for your cause. He’ll use dirty means to ensure you think only what he wants you to

“Forget that misogynist asshole, love. You don’t need to worry about people’s views on women, you’re right! And if anybody tries to say otherwise, I’ll make sure they end up broken and withered”

Yandere! Kanroji Mitsuri

You’re a very different woman in comparison to Mitsuri, she’s strong physically and you’re strong psychically! She was beyond flattered when you protected her during a fight and remarked that women are as good as men

She is emotional and affectionate, she wants to hug you constantly and with how supportive you are of women, you let her. You inspire her to be better and love herself, a lot more then she originally did

Yandere Mitsuri, once again, doesn’t change a lot when in love with a feminist Dokusha! She would most likely let you protect her at times and be a lot more touchy. But she is still as protective though!

Mitsuri likes the anthem songs you write for your little group and blasts them with the other Hashira. She is proud of her love and she’ll flaunter you and your group like a flag

She can’t bring herself to wipe away your independence and rights but she will eventually. She can’t lose you to this cruel word so she’ll end up sneakily kidnapping you and bringing you to the Love Estate

Mitsuri cries everytime you angrily yell at her for trying to control you. Hurting you is the last thing she wants to do but her obsession with you is stronger than her rationality, she must have you as hers

Rather she agrees with your feminist views or not, Mitsuri can’t avoid her Yandere instincts and she’ll cling onto you, attack anybody who bother you, and try trick you into spending more time with her

“Ah! I wish I was like you, Dokusha! You’re so strong and brave, you’ve helped me realise that I’m not just a man’s bride— I want to be your bride! We can live together forever with nobody around!”

[mjonthetrack]

Sane

After the group had met up it was decided they

would all hang out at Jimmy and Trinity’s home. Her own home was a decent size in the area but

this mansion made her place look like the slums.

Gaping at the decor and the way the space was

used, Mahina grasped Trinity’s hand noting

pictures of kids on the wall with Jimmy and her.

“Do you have any children Mahina?,” the older

woman asked noticing her smiling at the

picture. “I’d like to be a mother some day but I

feel that between modeling schedules as well as

my talk show I wouldn’t be the most available,”

Mahina spoke surely of herself making the other

woman nod. “Kids are a full time commitment

that’s for sure, the two little boys that were

running around Joe’s little girl were ours, we

waited a while to try and I’ll be honest the

process was really hard on my body.” After

hearing what she went through and ultimately

had to have her ability to get pregnant taken

away, Mahina took it all in, gently grasping the

woman’s hands she spoke thoughtfully,” I know

you’ve discussed it before but if you’re ever in

need of a surrogate I’d be happy to help you in

any way I can.” Trinity’s eyes widened at the

woman's comment her own eyes glistened,”

that’s very selfless of you and thoughtful, thank

you for being so kind to me,” she squeezed the

shorter woman into a hug.

Jimmy standing alongside his brother

approaching the two women gaped at the

shorter woman’s words. The petite woman

clearly had heart bigger than most, though his

brother's eyes hardened at the thought of

someone else’s baby in his-, he stiffened at the

possession his brain had made. Jey’s mouth

moved before his brain could process,” would

your soul flame be willing to allow that?

Mahina’s eyes flickered to his, evening her

expression steeling,�� If I had one I would know,

however this is my body and this conversation

didn’t involve you, but to further that I don’t

believe in that divine gift bullshit, men are trash

and I’m happily independent on my own.”

Jimmy grinned dapping her up and hugging

her,” as you should be queen,” his wife swatted

at him going back to talking kids with her. Jey

clenched then unclenched his jaw,” well I’m here

now and I think we should worry about us first,”

his comment now had made everyone in the

home pause, a new silence filled the air.

Mahina’s eyes narrowed at him her hands going

to her hips which triggered Drew to stand and

retrieve her friends arm pulling her out to the

deck before she went off. “Yo what’s with that

crazy ass man?!,” Mahina said uncomfortably

rubbing her arms staring out into the beautiful

evening sky. Drew sighed out, earlier whilst

getting herself a glass of Sangria out of the

kitchen it was made to her knowledge that Jey

had some strong belief her own best friend may

have been his soul flame. It would explain his

outburst back inside but it wouldn't explain her

friend’s complete ignorance of it. Drew knew

instantly Pili was her soul flame as soon as

they’d caught each other’s eyes. Then it hit why

the petite woman was standing guardedly,” you

know he’s your soul flame don’t you?” Mahina

avoided Drew’s deadpan,” I don’t believe in

that,” Drew nudged her hip catching her

attention,” it doesn’t work like that and you

know it, we all grew up hearing the stories

and how it would play out Nani.” Mahina

shrugged,” it does not mean I want to settle

down with him, I don’t know that old geezer and

he is not my type, not to mention his head

clearly has some screws loose to talk to me like

he owns me or something.” Drew scoffed to

avoid laughing instead she pulled a pre rolled

out of her hoodie offering it to Mahina who

gladly tugged her lighter out then taking a long

hit. “He should know better to control his

emotions, but its not a emotion you just control

out from the start, trust me Pili was soo

aggravatingly possessive the first few months.”

Mahina quirked a brow blowing smoke,”what

made him mellow out?” “Honestly bitch, lots of

sex,” Drew bluntly offered taking a hit herself at

the look on her friend’s face. “Yeah you’re crazy

I don’t know a thing about that man and you are

suggesting I shack up with him to soften his ego

based on some old myth I don’t believe in,”

Mahina shook her head. Drew’s lips parted,”well

to put a long story short yeah basically, but

you don’t have to move at his pace, honestly

Nani you’ve got a busy schedule and I know you

have been anti men since Tua-””don’t say his

name before he appears or something.” Rolling

her eyes at that,”you need to let that go,

because this is not a relationship you can run

from, it will find you wherever you hide.” Mahani

shrugged,” Drew, I love you, that man is a

stranger, the outburst adds to the fact I’m not

ready or interested in being objectified by some

random guy.” The taller woman takes note of

the four men talking in the kitchen right by the

deck when she caught Pili’s thumbs up she

shook her head putting her focus back on the

shorter woman. “I saw that!” Mahina pouted

flipping off Pili and bypassing Drew walking into

the house she glared openly at the men, then

brushed past moving to the guest room she

remembered was assigned to her.

“Well that went well,” Roman spoke

sarcastically lifting his beer back to his lips. Jey

noted the woman’s retreat down the hall,” isn’t

she too old to be avoiding people?” “Aren’t you

too old to be pressuring a complete stranger

into an unfamiliar situation,” Drew rebutted

making the man drink. Pili rubbed his fiancée’s

back,”she had a longtime bf and it didn’t end

well so her views on men are scewed a bit.”

Drew snorted,” I wouldn’t say that, men are

exactly what she says about them, besides you I

understand exactly how she feels.” “As do I,”

chimed Joe and Jimmy’s wives making the two

men gape and grumble. “No disrespect to old

dude but that doesn’t have shit to do with me, I

am a grown ass man, I have a great job, I’m

highly capable of taking care of myself and

anyone else, I have waited my whole damn life

for my flame to come around, I don’t give a fuck

about some old news, I’m here now and I always

get mines,” Jey snapped simply. He took it a

step forward,” I’m not some young buck who

doesn’t know what he’s doing, I’m too damn old

to be chasing her.” “Well I’m too damn young to

be playing some stay at home trophy wife for a

man who’s head is too big for their shoulders,”

Mahina barked out having returned to get water.

“Ah man,Uce she’s got fire to her, she’s got the

same temper as you, I say match made in

heaven,” Jimmy laughed out moving to join his

wife on the couch. The others ducked off to the

living room not wanting any smoke from the pair

who seemed to be at a face off on opposite ends

of the kitchen island. “You don’t know a damn

thing about me old man, now I suggest you stop

speaking on me before I put you in your place,”

Mahina stands squarely checking his posture in

case she needed to act on her words. “I know

your little ass ain’t tryna size me up Ma,” Jey

had a small smirk on his face, folding his tatted

arms across his chest,”you must not know who I

am little girl.” “Call me little again,” Mahina was

working her hair into a pony tail, “should you

stop her?” Drew shook her head downing her

drink,” it’s getting good.” Jey laughed his

bottom set of grills showed,” yeah you’re

definitely out your rabbit ass mind Ma, your

little ass deaf or something?” Mahina practically

flew at him her hands were almost at his neck,

the flames in her eyes were burning brightly and

it amused the man to no end to have effectively

shifted her attention on him like that. He didn’t

flinch at the jab she threw to his side, he let her

get a few in, a bemused smile on his face, Jey

easily hoisted her over his shoulder,” you need

a serious time out little bit.”

[autisticlegolas]

i’ve been rewatching bones (i’m season 5 aka) the development of bones and booth relationship post booth’s coma which turned brennan slowly from an independent woman who does not need the approval of someone else’s opinion or take someone else’s opinion as gospel (she goes to angela to have another perspective to judge things from another point of view and come to her own conclusion with the new perspective shared).

What i’ve noticed in the beginning of the season (it happened from time to time in previous seasons but it had a more of a bantering atmosphere to it) is how she will honestly ask for booth’s opinion and encouraging him to share it (as if that dude never speaks his truth out like, he can’t fucking shut up about being christian and god and how the OnLy WaY tO tRuLy LiVe is to worship the christian god). She used to go head to head with him that’s what made them “shippable”.

But since they are writing them as “coming to terms with their feelings”/“developing romantic feelings for each other” that since of their relationship slowly died and slowly turns brennan into a “perfect-christian-nuclear-family wife who agrees and seeks approval of her husband for his self esteem”. the self esteem part is Sooo present here because of his coma he had problems with reality and his memories and not knowing how he used to dress how he usually enjoys food and other stuff and she is just like “oh it’s okay my big strong man who’s very manly and have very manly life experience i will be here to brush your ego and self esteem the right way and cuddle your emotions”.

In a way yeah what she’s doing is the right thing to reassure someone and help them when they share their struggle with their identity crisis/problems. but knowing this is a 2005 national television show on fox of all channels is not something you can look away and not acknowledge in your analysis of the writing.

okay wow i just wanted to make a silly post about it not an analysis of a character development on fox show.

[dearinglovebot]

No because non binary Maisie is so real I need someone to elaborate on that. When and how did she realise it? What was her coming out like?

I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED.

in the wise words of isabella sermon maisie was raised by a #Strong Independent Woman so she doesn’t really conceptualize Gender that much. everyone is just kind of a person to her. she’s met maybe 10 people ever and they’ve been a very strange and diverse group. she has no reason to question it at this point. she’s always had more “tomboy” interests and fashion sense but it’s never a big deal bc claire and owen have bigger things to worry about (avoiding jail time, velociraptor in the backyard, attempted kidnappings, etc. the usual)

it’s when she goes to college or whatever that she’s like What The Fuck is Wrong With You People. apparently it’s feminine to drink lemonade so she says it fuck it I’m nonbinary now. just kidding. but yeah she has a whole culture shock and momentarily considers going back to the woods. at first she thinks she’s just a tomboy bc she can’t relate to the girly girls on campus but then she befriends some queer people including gnc women and trans ppl and she’s like… Wait A Minute. for some reason she relates more to tgirls and tboys on campus than the masc cis girls and she’s like haha isn’t that weird (egg). but still… she doesn’t fully relate to tboys bc she’s not a man but she’s also not really that much of a girl. probably takes sometime to research and more hanging out for her to be like WAIT!! non-binary exists

her coming out is easy bc her parents are pushing 50 at this point and they only have a vague idea of what that is. they’re too busy sitting on the porch like old people to care about pronouns. claire’s like wow the kids are having so much fun these days. good for them❤️ (bisexual who experienced the 90s) and owen’s like does They want chicken for dinner tonight? (ally doing his best). in fact she’s like “it’s ok dad you can just call me your son if that’s easier” and he’s like “no you are my They” (he forgot that child is gender neutral for a minute).

maisie’s exact identity and pronouns is up to interpretation but my vision is of a somewhat labelless masc they/sometimes she (used here for clarity). in a video game with only male/female options she’d pick male and give her character a skater girl look basically.

[bohemian-nights]

sophie can still be a black woman ? sophie and michaela are not mutually exclusive it does not have to be either or like can we all just wait n see what happens?

I agree, but the problem is people seem to think that Michaela should be our only representation since the show has “too many” Black people and isn’t “diverse enough.”

Both opinions are complete and utter bull crap rooted in anti-Blackness. The reality is that Bridgeton only has two regular Black female characters who are both stereotypes(strong independent woman who doesn’t need a man💁🏽‍♀️).

If the shoe was on the other foot nobody would be cheering this shit on. In fact you’d never hear the end of it. These people literally complain about shit that doesn’t matter already, but since it’s the group everybody likes to use and abuse they don’t give a damn.

Sophie should be Black too, but at this point I’ve lost hope of Shonda doing the right thing and actually caring about other Black women and our representation. I hope I’m proven wrong and Sophie is Black, but it is what it is…

[goldensunset]

What do you think of Kairi, Xion, Naminé, and Aqua? Just general feelings, nothing too detailed if you don't want to-

like as a team, or individually?

as a team: oh how i WISH we could see it in canon. even if it were to end up borderline tokenism-y like with marvel. i would love to see the girl power squad idc i think they should hype each other up their color schemes together would be so pretty

kairi: my dearly beloved. yes the writers need to treat her better but so do the fans. she does have clearly defined character motivations and it’s weird to act like she doesn’t just bc they’re not ones that people like. she just wants stability and a home after having lost her memories and crash-landed somewhere as a toddler. she’s afraid of change but will do anything to stay with her friends in the midst of a fast-moving world because she’s lost them too many times. she’s a bit out of touch with them and sometimes clearly doesn’t know the right thing to do or say. i hope kh4 treats her kindly and gently and gives her more agency without trying to flatten her into a hashtag strong independent woman. i have high hopes for my little strawberry and wild daydreams about what i would love to see as her precise role in coming games. wrote some stuff in the tags here. i swear i thought i had more pre-written essays to draw on than that i know there’s so much i’m leaving out but i think i got the main points

xion: truly i will never be able to get over her story and especially her theme. what an incredibly well composed piece of music. honestly she and her theme were like a major factor as to me getting into this series. i’m very happy she’s alive after all that. i said a lot about her here already recently so i won’t burn myself out going into detail again. even that i feel like is a minor weak attempt at fully conveying my emotions regarding her. oh and a few more thoughts here

naminé: tbh thinking about chain of memories reduces me to a puddle but like in a bittersweet way as opposed to the pure bitterness of days. like sora’s interactions with her… their relationship even if it was brief and based on an illusion…the writing and animation and voice acting was legit so good man. i’m a wreck. nami is so beautiful and strong and horribly horribly sad but she gets overlooked… the thing is that even if she has people who love her she’s still nobody’s first choice. she doesn’t have her own place to go. she’s still lonely…

aqua: MAN she’s so interesting.. the way she’s carrying on eraqus’ legacy in both good and bad ways… the way she was corrupted after wandering a distorted world alone for a decade… the way she’s headstrong and determined and fights so hard yet can hardly make a difference as her world falls down around her… the way she’s incredibly strong and proud yet you see her once-firm core begin to shake as time passes on… not entirely related but i hope we get to see her (and the other two) (and kairi as her student!) visit the ruins of scala ad caelum bc they’re the last ones carrying on that legacy

[brunettebombshells-world]

Hey everyoneee! I passed all my exams and I did very well so sorry for my break I didn’t warn you :(!

I’ve been reposting a lot but that’s not what I want to talk with you rn 😸

I’ve had this idea since 10 minutes ago and omg I know I could never write that but well I can still try if no one wanna do it😭🤣

So the idea of Blue Lock’s boys but mermaid realm au !!!

I’m fascinated by mermaids and I thought of a serie where instead of fighting for ranks to become the best striker in Blue Lock they would be fighting for being the close guard to the royal family of mermaids yk ?!!!?

And !!!!!

The reader (a woman, I’ll explain why) is the one who’s chosen for this because she literally beat them at every tests and surprisingly they (blue lock boys) aren’t jealous, in fact they’re quite amazed and proud(?)

Why the reader should be a woman ? Because I find it better and more changing to have a woman who beat hundreds of men in what they think they are the strongest ! The pronouns, they/them preferably !

I don’t have anything at all with non-binary or male readers but I find this idea super interesting and since I’m a feminist I find it real cool!

To not forget the reader’s personality ! I’ve read so many stories where the reader who’s a female/woman is too much sexualized/infantilized or described as all kind and such, don’t mistake me you can be very kind and also strong and independent at the same time but wouldn’t it be better to have a reader who has a backstory and who can show feelings and does not accept comments about what she does as a woman compared to a man ?

So! The reader’s personality ! Very cold and distant at first but knows how to show feelings towards people in need, protective (that’s their job basically☠️), independent (they be like ‘I don’t need no man to save me I’m strong enough 😡!’) and the rest you choose or I’ll do if I write the story but yeahhhh!

I hope you will understand what I mean !

Love y’all 💋💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻