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#I yap in these tags way too much sorry guys
amphirrhvx · 2 months
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we're halfway there ! 🩷
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no text version
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satorisoup · 2 months
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people will think im ordinary until they say one (1) thing about tmnt and all of a sudden im explaining the entire lore starting from the 1990’s movie & why donatello is the best turtle i fear… T^T
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tag limit fights me… i must yap… please listen… SOB </3
#tmnt yap in the taggies !!#would you believe me if i said my cat is named after donnie… teehee !! ^_^#i have been a tmnt lover since i was the ripe age of 6 years old SOBSOB#i used to write bf headcanons on wattpad way long ago… thats where my love for writing started i fear…#i probably have more tmnt merch than i do anime merch which is soso crazy to think about PHEW !!!#notebooks cups plushies legos shirts pajamas stickers tins action figs keychains name something and i have it… is that weird… SOB#im not joking when i say i know the entire lore and could explain everything from start to finish… FOR EACH AND EVERY REBOOT EVER…. wowza…#other than rottmnt because i’ve never been a fan of that reboot sigh…#the only reason donatello hamato isnt on my blorbie list is because i do not want to seem out of touch… he used to be there though !! :3#also i love raph too sigh#i fear donnie was my start to my love for nerdy men… raph was for the mean ones… cough cough akaashi and bakugo#tall lanky men… yeah hes a turtle… i know… let me speak… pls… i beg… T^T#tmnt 2012 will always be my star my light my beloved#i can recite every single episode </3 ALSO THE 2014 & 2017 MOVIES DONT GET ME STARTED i have them on dvd :3#i also have the 1990’s movies on dvd teehee theyre sososososoo good T^T my comfort franchise forever and always#i may always speak of anime but just know tmnt will always be the start of it all and my most beloved <3 its everything to me#also i was and still am an avid tmnt 2012 april oneil hater someone get her out of there i loathe her >:/#was never a supa big fan of leo im very sorry… idk who im sorry to… where are my tmnt fans… am i alone in this world… hello… tmnt fans…#omigosh im back after looking at my old wattpad story IM GIGGLING why was the writing kinda good… it was first person though sigh… goodness#i should create my own tmnt yap tag i fear… i will never shut up about it EVER SOBSOBSOB !! i even had a tmnt party when i was younger </3#donnie ( & mikey ) are so misunderstood UGH i could yap about the lore all day. donnie deserved more recognition he was always doing so muc#FOR ALL of his brothers and they never appreciated it… ill cry right now. donnie you will always be famous to me. april doesnt deserve you.#raph and his temper are so misunderstood too like please. always making him the bad guy HE JUST WANTS TO BE A GOOD BROTHER HES JUST AWKWARD#remembering when i had a crush on a guy names joseph in first grade and he liked tmnt too… joseph just know we were soulmates… i promise </#i used to go up to the tv and kiss the screen when donnie showed up. i was like 6 years old tho its okay… still sleep with my stuffie tho.#thank you to my yaya for buying me that when i had the flu hes still in perfect condition SOB donatello i love you so much UGH im crying#‘thats a mutant turtle ew !!’ HE IS VERY BEAUTIFUL AND LOVEABLE TO ME. YOU WOULDNT UNDERSTAND EVERYPONY </3 nia reference woah hi nia :3#whos in favor of tmnt. raise your hands up high so i can see them. im giggling. tmnt lovers rise we sha’ll prosper… WE RIDE AT DAWN 🦅🦅🦅#is this like totally crazy of me… has anyone read this far… if you have jusy know i love you. i cherish you. you are my everything <3#₍ᐢ..ᐢ₎ — lene’s latest gossip .ᐟ
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deepseawave · 2 months
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obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog
Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️
Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D
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#guys help is it time for a rebranding?? am I just gonna post about f1 now??#I still can’t believe this has all started because bestie and I were watching Ted Lasso (because I’ve been obsessed with that show for a#while now too) and I paused the episode to talk about how I really like the way Jamie interacts with kids (I’m sorry people being good with#and nice to kids is one of my weaknesses I work with kids now and have been invested in treating kids well forever)#so me saying that apparently reminded her of max and she showed me a video of him with p and yeah it was very effective in making me like#him and then we left the episode on pause and she told me a lot about f1 and max specifically cause I was interested now lmao (funny thing#is that she also got roped into it by our other friends I swear it’s speeding lmao#she also compared him to Jamie from Ted lasso (if you know you know) and showed me some heart wrenching Taylor swift edits (i haven’t#emotionally recovered yet) and yeah that’s how I started consuming way too much f1 content on YouTube and got into this whole mess lmao#oh yeah our friends also made me and another friend make a Tier list for all the drivers based on vibes alone (cause I only knew a bit about#max at that time and the other one knew nothing really) which was very funny too#especially looking back at it (we did some of them so dirty lmao 😂)#I’ve also come to the conclusion that tumblr is still one of the least annoying platforms to engage with other people (still)#YouTube is full of hate comments about drivers and stuff it’s so annoying actually#not to mention Twitter but I don’t go there and probably never will 😂#I personally don’t enjoy fics and scenarios and shipping of real people cause it makes me a bit uncomfy (not judging people who do#you do you as long as it doesn’t negatively affect anyone#but yeah I’d much rather just scroll by those here than have to look away from all the mindless hate and which driver is better discussions#everywhere else like I’m not one to engage with stuff like that but it does upset me to some#degree so yeah tumblr making memes and being rather positive about their drivers (most of what I’ve seen here of course there are gonna be#annoying people everywhere) is much more tolerable and a lot more enjoyable for me#whoops this post got away from me again oh dear#I’ve had the idea for a meme stuck in my head for days now: Max verstappen but make it if you don’t love me at my *swearing on team radio#giving spicy replies and attitude to the media maxplaining and complaining going for risky overtakes* you don’t deserve me at my *precious#interactions with p talking about his cats being a goofball with other drivers and especially danny defending other drivers driving#beautifully in the rain* it’s a package deal you can’t just pick and choose and personally I don’t even get why people complain about some#of the other stuff I appreciate someone who’s passionate and honest and genuinely kind where it matters 🤷🏻‍♀️#I think I’ve seen someone else say that but the more people complain about and criticize max the more I feel the need to defend him#god forbid women have hobbies for real (can’t believe I’ve yapped so much I can’t put more tags 💀)#also shoutout to Oscar Piastri and Danny Ric (I was so happy Oscar won even tho McLaren where being very silly in a not so funny way)
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barneysbigstompers · 2 months
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I will become a nonchalant dreadhead to reach peak antisocialism
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stuffeddeer · 1 month
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YOURE BACK !!! YAYY im literally at episode 10 of the apothecary diaries (yes im watching it almost a year later)
You’re making me consider reading the manga 😞
OMG YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE!!!!! first of all IM BACK!!!!! sometimes you just need to disappear for um. a few months! before locking tf back in 🐺 secondly YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE i loveee apothecary diaries it has nestled its way into my brain like a worm and the manga only gets better im so excited for s2
im glad to be back 😎 cleaned up my acct a little too teehee my masterlist is ever growing and hopefully a bit easier to traverse. LOCKED IN!!!!!!!
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tsukiida · 4 months
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i just scrolled through my blog and i realised i have only two modes: weird pseudo-philosophical rambling. and absolutely unhinged yelling. AND I TELL YOUUUU IT'S SO FUNNYYYYYYY because i spent so long trying to curate my voice and sound like a normal, fun, easy to approach person back when i first made this blog!
then again it's been 3.5 years so i guess my voice changed naturally 🤨 i'm not smart enough for this 😮‍💨
#nia.musings#sorry even using this tag makes me snort. wdym musing girlie. are u a philosopher. big brain? 🤩🤩 2024 me is bullying 2020 me#also not me saying “im not smart enough for this” for anything that requires me to use more than 2 braincells#couldn't be bothered trying to make sense for more a second#kickstarting my own brainless era and i wear my crown so well#also random but i'm soooooo ready to infest this blog with jjk. i probably won't do that because that piece of art traumatises me#by that i mean i like it and keep up with it far too much for someone who claims theyre traumatised#my emotional scale is SHOT because of it. more pain than preferable. but i do quite enjoy it#and considering i go through sooooo much jjk content on tumblr it's only fair that i showcase it all on my blog :3#i have about 700 draft reblogs on a sideblog i made to save posts when i wasnt active here. i made it this year but theres SO much now#also lowkey regret not being active (though i had no energy) here in 2021 2022 2023 because i had so many thoughts about bnha#and now it's nearly over#like what do you meannnn i didnt get to yap about my spinner era from 2021.#what do you mean my love to hate and back to love arc for dabi didnt get documented in the annals of tumblr dot com#AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN MY MELTDOWN LAST YEAR RE: HAWKS' QUIRK DIDNT GET PUBLICISED#this is all a joke because i for real (FR FR) had ZERO chance of being here because life was putting me through its TRIALS#still is. but that's the way life is. we go on. <3.#speaking of trials. no one here was privy (wait i think i mentioned it in an rb) to my jason grace breakdown when i found out What Happened#sucks !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#i wasnt made for emotional pain.#also it's funny to me how none of my followers have unfollowed me so far.#are u guys also all inactive or do u just not see me anymore because tumblr's dash algorithm gives u random posts now#thats the only thing i dislike about tumblr now. i LOVE how it lets you edit tags now. also will always miss the old layout
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stvolanis · 6 months
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What about rafe with a reader who talks a lot land has a bubbly personality and he’s getting annoyed cause she’s just talking on and on and he’s already in a bad mood and so her just talking he’s getting annoyed and like he makes a comment of “why don’t you stop talking and put your mouth to a better use” (sorry for how badly worded this is)
hi! I kinda imagine this as maybe bestfriend!Rafe who kinda manipulates the reader yk? Also knocking two birds w/ one stone by adding a little bit from a different request, hope you don’t mind!💞
Rafe Cameron! who loves his silly little best friend who he’s had a claim on since 6th grade :). Always so sweet to him when you guys were in school together. Giving him the answers, walking with him to all your classes, rides home after school with you on aux cause how could he ever say no to you? Not to mention the fact that he knew you harbored a little crush on him—
Rafe Cameron! Who knew you were heavily inexperienced in the sexual realm of things, which he made sure of after he beat up every guy who even thought they’d be able to breathe the same air as you. He takes great pride in being able to teach you things no one else will. Of course you’d question it, looking up at him with those pretty doe eyes that make his cock pulse with confusion when you guys were in the back seat of his truck one day. “Rafey, I dunno if we should do this—feels weird.” You muttered, your hand tightly wrapped around his cock with his hand shoved down your pants. “Thought you wanted to take care of me, sweetheart? This is just what best friends are supposed to do.”
Rafe Cameron! Who’s been having an exhaustingly annoying day after another group fight between the kooks and pogues. He’s a little scratched up, moping around your house as you go on and on about why he shouldn’t have fought, what could have happened—and then suddenly trailing off to your favorite pasta shell? It was hurting his head. Too much for him to process as he rubbed his temple, watching you babble mindlessly.
Rafe Cameron! Who finally has had enough of your constant yapping. “God, baby, you ever shut the fuck up? Hm? Jus’ be fuckin’ quiet, little girl.” He hissed through clenched teeth, pinching your cheeks together harshly to cease your talking, yet the way your eyes watered and thighs clenched together didn’t go unnoticed. “Think you jus’ need somethin’ stuffed in there so you’ll shut up. That it?” He mocked. You looked up at him from your knees, confused as to what he was referring to.
Rafe Cameron! Who’s cock slapped against your waiting tongue in a taunting manner. Curved slightly, with trimmed hair at the base and heavy balls. His scent strong, consuming your mind with an aching throb between your thighs you knew only Rafe could help. “Gonna teach you how to suck dick like a pro, kay?” He urged, pushing his fat tip into your mouth, further and further till the sounds of you gagging and gasping for air around him was all he could hear, and tears running down your pretty face was all he could see. “That’s my girl. See? All you needed was some good dick to shut cha’little ass up, huh?” He cooed.
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don’t be shy, ask to be a part of the tag list and request things!!
TAG LIST: @elvisalltheway101 @epthedream69 @claire-elvisgirl @elvisrealgf @littlehoneyposts @ireallydontcareanymorebrooo @luxuriouslokistan-3 @foxevxid @sapriao @xiyingly @jazminsjaz @likeits2002 @www-interludeshadow-com @khxna @my-fabulousness-has-arrived @hockeyrat @rafeswhorejjsslut @peterpan-neverfails @sunflowerskenz @lemonadygirl @newavenger @bloobewy @hewwokitti3
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tulip-room · 3 months
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•.¸♡ Sweet Treats♡¸.•
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A/N: Hello!!! So I’m branching out a little bit and writing for some more fandoms! This is going to be a collection of oneshots that are purely selfish because I’m about to go to pastry school and want more content for Baker! Readers. That being said I hope you enjoy this little thing <3 the taglist for all of these are open currently so reply in the comments of this post for which ones you want to be tagged for <3 I’ll stop yapping now and list the stories <333
Haikyu!!
Straw”Berry” happy to see you -> Osamu orders a cake for Suna’s birthday and when he goes to pick it up falls head over heels for the cute owner so he becomes a regular. (Osamu x reader)
Whisk You Away -> Ushijima swears by your sweets so when Tendo visits he of course has to try one. He wasn’t expecting the owner to be so cute and makes it his mission to “Whisk you away” on a date. (Tendo x reader)
Slice of Your Heart -> Atsumu really does try to follow his diet but how can he when the bakery owner who lives next door is so irresistible? (Atsumu x reader)
Cavity -> Oikawa thinks you’re too sweet and will give him a cavity (Oikawa x reader)
Heart Shaped Cookies -> You make the best healthy cookies and when delivering them to the team Ushijima is surprised to see…only his are heart shaped? (Ushijima x reader)
Cheat Day ->  Sakusa forgets his lunch at home and you bring it to him. One problem, you guys forgot to tell his friends you were dating. (Sakusa x reader)
Blueberry milk cookies? -> Although sweet treats don’t usually catch his eye when Kageyama learns that one might be inspired by him he has to try one for himself. (Kageyama x reader)
Excuses -> Suna’s little sister loves your sweet treats. That’s definitely why he’s in there so often (Suna x reader)
JJK
Crusts -> Nanami never thought much about the crusts on sandwiches until you start making them for him and you never leave them on. (Nanami x reader)
Warm -> Gojo isn’t sure how you always smell like fresh baked cookies (Gojo x reader)
Sweet Tooth -> Megumi didn’t know he had a sweet tooth until he tasted your kisses (Megumi x reader)
Sugar Sweet -> You and Geto make some sweet treats with the girls and start a food fight which ends in a bath and many sugary kisses (Geto x reader)
Written in Icing -> Inumaki gets a little insecure that he can’t communicate the same way everyone else can. So, he writes his feelings in icing on a cake to confess to his crush. (Inumaki x reader)
Blue Lock
Citrus -> You make a new dessert and Rin taste tests it (Rin x reader)
Cupcake -> Bachira helps you make cupcakes and shenanigans ensue (Bachira x reader)
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Some of these characters I’ve never written for so I’m sorry if they’re a little ooc! These are Works In Progress currently! This is just a list to see who all wants to see it and to help me keep myself organized!!! If you want to check out any of my other works though feel free to do so! My asks are also open if you want to request anything ^-^
masterlist
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durrtydawg · 3 months
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Look, Don't Touch.
(Sam Drake x F!Reader smut) 3rd person
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CW: It's smut, it's sex polleny, and it's got a big, fat, dubcon warning. Also a bit of angst, hurt/comfort, internal conflict, etc etc. For detailed tags, please check out ao3, as funnily enough, I literally cannot add any more text into this post 😛
Masterlist
This is long. Horrendously long. Like... *18,000 words* or so, so I don't want to hear any yapping if you click 'read more' and don't actually want to read. Dare I say, quantity over quality? Sorry to those that wanted this split into parts, but honestly... I couldn't make it work, so here we are. Regardless, I hope someone out there enjoys this!! It's been my baby for a while, and whilst not the best thing I've written, I need to let it go before I, too, become a reprobate by force x
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭
“In the wake of the Second World War, the elusive Polish alchemist Dariusz Cassimir left behind a legacy shrouded… ooo… in mystery. Hmm. Shrouded is a fun word.”
“Big door. Ominous etchings. Doesn’t get more ‘shrouded in mystery’ than that. This has gotta be it.”
“O-kay… But how do we get in?”
She shrugs, turning back to him with a raised brow. “Oh, I don’t know, Sam, maybe the huge lever right next to said mysterious door?” She purposely targets her flashlight at his face, making her way over to the lever. He swats her with the notes in his hand.
“Okay,” Sam sniffs, striding ahead with a crack of the knuckles after he fixes his own torch to his belt, “‘Cause of the attitude, I get to open it.” He grins sarcastically, making sure to gently nudge her shoulder as he passes, thrusting the papers he was reading from into her hands.
Her eyes roll, but she finds the cockiness endearing- and he knows it.
“Known for his work in chemical weapon and explosives development throughout the Great War, and the start of the Second, Cassimir's true genius lay in the shadows, where he conducted secretive experiments with potions, remedies, and poisons, yada yada… yeah, right.”
She continues reading out from where he left off as Sam checks around the lever for any dodgy set-ups that might send the two of them plummeting into an inescapable pit, falling victim to some sort of horrific creature ready to maul the two of them to death, or perhaps crushed by a flurry of falling boulders, etcetera, etcetera. No death trap is too garish in this line of work.
“Oh. Listen to this. Ahem. Despising intrusion into his work, Cassimir was rumoured to eliminate those who stumbled upon these experiments without permission.” She hums. “So, not only was this guy insane, but he was a murderer too- hey, be careful with that lever, please... I don’t want a repeat of the Tuscan trap door incident.” She sighs, fingernails trepidatiously digging into the straps on her backpack as he braces his hands against the lever.
“Still not over that, huh?” Sam snorts, turning back to her with an arrogance-tinged smirk as she grimaces, folding the paper and stuffing it into her jacket pocket.
“My ankle isn't.”
He scoffs. “Every possible trap we’ve come across today has either rotted itself out of action or has been destroyed by some other poor bastard that got here before us. Besides,” He stamps a boot against the ground to prove his point, “It’s a dense stone floor. I don’t think trap doors are a cause for concern here.”
“Famous last words.” She murmurs as he pulls on the lever, a soft grunt signalling that it takes more effort than initially predicted. “You sure you don't want to find another way in before you start fiddling with- nope? Okay.”
“What’s…the worst…” he pauses, re-positioning himself to give a little more force to the lever, “that could- Ow, Jesus!” He cuts himself off with a hiss of pain as the lever finally gives and he stumbles upright, wincing.
“Aw. Too much strain on your big, strong, man muscles?” She questions teasingly as Sam glares at his hand, flexing his fingers with a frown.
“The damn thing pricked me.”
A sudden deep rumble through the ground prevents her from quipping back as both of their attention is now taken by the stone wall in front of them slowly sliding to the side with a wince-worthy scrape.
“It’s always fascinating how something so archaic can still be so…mobile.” Sam says inquisitively, causing her to snort.
“Talking about you, or the door?”
He offers her no more than an unimpressed glare, lips pursed and eyes heavy-lidded, still scrunching and un-scrunching his hand.
“You’re lucky you’re cute, ya know.” He grumbles, watching a cheeky pout form on her lips.
“Thank you. Anyway, it's probably not that old. Cassimir used this place as his base between the first and second world wars, which, in the grand scheme of things, isn't that long ago. I’m guessing, with all the influence he had-”
“-He spruced up the place. New doors. Lick of paint. Few booby traps for good measure. The usual stuff.” He concludes for her with a slow nod, eyes narrowed at the lever, attention diverting back from the door to his palm.
She snickers.
Her smile deepens into a grin as he bares his teeth in irritation at his tiny little injury.
He grumbles, thumb rubbing small circles on his palm.
She steps forwards, “C’mon, grump. Serves you right for touching things you shouldn't.”
“Well, thank you for exhibiting the utmost care and patience.” He responds, brows knitted together as he continues to scrutinise his hand.
“Don't guilt-trip me.” She turns back and holds onto his wrist gently to inspect the palm of his hand. A little more than a pin-prick sits in the centre; a fresh bead of blood oozing to the surface each time he wipes one away. 
She pouts as she examines it, then offers a quick glance to the lever to see…nothing interesting at surface level. She turned to him with a moue. “What is it? A splinter?”
“Don’t think so.” He mutters, wiping the speckles of blood onto his jeans, nose scrunched into an expression of disapproval.
“Well…You’ve gone through far worse. C’mon.”
He hums in amusement at her dismissal of interest before the two of them begin to walk down the newly revealed corridor.
As she disappears off into the distance, Sam takes a glance at his assailant, cringing as he notes a tiny divot in the centre of the smooth, varnished wood of the lever- furthermore, two engraved letters beneath it. ‘I D’.
“The hell does i-d mean?” He mutters, glancing at his hand again and wiping it on his jeans for the second time with an irked grunt. Strange.
“Noooo!” Her voice echoes from around the corner, attracting his attention back to the task at hand. Or… away from hand, rather.
He turns in her direction, approaching from behind as she grumbles at yet another obstacle. She frowns down at a dormant stone pressure plate on the floor.
“Guess old Cassimir really doesn’t want us getting in there, huh?” Sam mutters, making his way beside her as they both look at yet another enormous door blocking them from proceeding any further.
“Yeah. What an asshole.” She turns to Sam, tongue swirling contemplatively around a molar as he looks down at her with narrowed eyes. “Any lever this time? Stupid thing won’t do anything.” A tut from her makes him chuckle, watching her impatiently scuff the toe of her boot against the plate as if it’ll make it do something other than sink into the ground a little.
He shakes his head, hands on his hips as he ponders their next move. After a moment, he pouts.
“You… think you can squeeze through there?” Sam questions, eye-line fixing onto the discoloured stained glass of a small window framed by stone above the door.
Her cheeks puff up as she assesses the window held ajar by some sort of rusted hinge. A slow exhale deflates said cheeks before she shrugs.
“You severely underestimate the size of my ass, but yes. If you can get me up there, I can certainly try to ‘squeeze through’.”
“Hmm.”
He leans back, making a show of inspecting her rear with exaggerated intrigue.
“Oh, y- yeah, you might be right.”
She flashes a middle finger. “He's here all week!”
“You'd love that, huh.”
“Stop flirting for a sec and help me up.” She teases, feeding his ego slightly.
Ready to crack on, Sam crouches a little, a small grin pinned to his face at her quip. He puts his arms out as she takes a few steps back.
"M'lady."
"Alright, Patrick Swayze." She chuckles, diluted sarcasm in her tone. “Watch those hands.”
He scoffs in response, patting his thigh as if to non-verbally tell her to shut up and get on with it.
After a little run up, the pair manage to execute a relatively successful boost manoeuvre, resulting in boots scuffing against the stone wall as she scrambles the remainder of the way up to the window.
“Nobody puts Baby in a fuckin’ corner.” he commends her dexterity from the ground, his continuation of her reference sending a grin creeping onto her face as she pushes the window further open, wriggling her way through the gap.
“Damn right.” She replies, eventually disappearing out of his sight. She slides down the wall, dust and flecks of rubble curling off of the surface as she approaches the ground.
Dusting her gravelly hands off on her leggings and adjusting the torch clipped to her backpack strap, she begins to look around.
“Shit.” is all she can muster.
Sam glances up at the stained glass, thumb rubbing at the sting in his palm, eyes focusing on coloured Latin lettering separated by intricately crafted lead framing.
Firmitudo Intus Aequilibrio
“You okay?” He pushes, his voice muffled from behind the wall, head tilted to the side in thought as he reads the stained glass. The cogs turn, congruous smirk etching its way onto his lips- his knowledge of Latin permits a little smugness, or so he tells himself.
She nods slowly, before realising that Sam can’t actually see her, almost too distracted by her new surroundings to offer a verbal response.
“Y-yeah, I’m all good.” She clears her throat, turning off her torch. “This place just… you ever seen Shrek 2?”
The stone walls, worn and weathered, stand sentinel, bearing witness to the passage of time. They’re tall. Imposing. But there’s a beauty to their eeriness, aided by the soft, colourful glow from the bottles that haven't succumbed to time.
"Sure. Great hangover movie."
Dust particles dance in the air, caught in the soft rays of crisp winter moonlight filtering through thick tree roots that make up the ceiling, casting ethereal streaks around the room.
"Well, picture the shelves in the dinky potion room."
The shelves, carved untidily into the walls, cradle a trove of relics from bygone eras. Flasks, vials, and jars, now cloaked in the patina of age, their contents long untouched- some clearly from medieval times; when the crypt was first used as an underground apothecary, to more contemporary receptacles used by Casimir himself to store whatever insane concoctions he experimented with; early 20th century brand logos indented into glass, less worn and more transparent than others.
"The one that cat gets the potion stuck in?"
"That's the one." She titters. Sam hums in understanding. "Ha. 'That cat'."
The lair’s height is imposing, a testament to the grandeur of Casimir’s forgotten pursuits. Yet, amidst the stone walls, pockets of soft, colourful radiance emanate from a select few frosty flasks perched high on the shelves. These remaining potions, survivors of the relentless march of time, cast speckled, saturated glows of purples, pinks, and blues around the plethora of other vials and tubes that have greyed and muddied over the years.
It’s all quite something.
She steps back, lips parted as she takes in her surroundings, fingers wrapped around the straps of her backpack. Her breath catches as she feels sudden give in the ground beneath her, calming when she realises she’s trodden on another pressure plate, though this time it doesn’t remain unresponsive.
As the door behind her rumbles and begins to grate upwards, she turns as her heart rate spikes in shock. Sam, still standing on the corresponding slab, watches in intrigue as the room she’s in reveals itself to him. He smiles when he sees her, the mechanism suddenly making sense.
Wagging a finger up to the latin-scribed stained glass window, he chuckles knowingly.
“Balance.” He says, winking at her as she tilts her head cluelessly.
“What?” She asks as he saunters into the room, shining his torch around.
“Latin. See, I’m the brains of this whole operation.”
“Hm.” She huffs. “Thought you were the beauty.”
He scoffs in response to her attempt at sarcasm, walking past her to the heart of the room as the door scrapes shut again. “Hey, you said it.” He smirks over his shoulder at her as she shakes her head.
A stone slab serves as what Sam presumes was once Casimir's makeshift desk, worn and weathered and mossy like the walls that surround it. On its surface, an array of flasks and mixing bowls, each bearing the damage of countless failed experiments, sitting in a dusty mosaic of scientific chaos.
“Spooky.” She mutters, crouching to inspect some brittle bird bones sprawled out on the stone surface. Aged twigs and fibres, remnants of ingredients that probably pulsed with life once upon a time, now lie in withered repose, their potency surrendered to decay. Sam huffs.
“Oof. It is stuffy as balls in here.” He mumbles, hands skimming through parchment laid on the surface.
The room's cold dampness has left its mark on scrawled notes and papers, ink faded, edges curled, bearing witness to the crypt’s neglect.
“Cold as balls.” she contradicts with a punctuating shiver.
Sam gawks at her as if she’s just said something completely insane, but she’s too busy plinking flasks around to notice. It's goddamn roasting.
That, and her idiom makes no sense whatsoever. He’d laugh if he wasn’t so preoccupied with how antsy he feels.
He rolls his neck, an uncomfortable crack making him huff again, yet as his head hangs sideways, he catches a glimpse of something a little more substantial than a few sheets of faded parchment.
Nestled within the clutter, a chunky, leather-bound notebook sits, worn from use, but still relatively intact. “Hell-o.” He purrs, pushing aside some of the papers to grab it.
“What’cha got?” she chirps, still facing one of the many shelves, crystalline clinks reverbing off of the walls as she continues imbibing in her own curiosity.
“I think,” Sam's fingers delicately trace the timeworn pages of the notebook, each page imbued with the secrets of Casimir’s elixir recipes and incantations, “we have got our hands on Mr. Magic Man’s recipe book.”
“Ooo. Anything juicy?”
He leans a hip against the stone, cupping the book in one hand whilst the other tugs at the sherpa collar rubbing against the back of his neck. It is stuffy.
"Uh, yeah, there's... there's definitely some interesting stuff in here," He replies vaguely, his mind preoccupied with the subtle shifts in his body's temperature.
“Spill.” She says, finally diverting her attention from the shelves, a frosty puff of air billowing from her lips as she speaks.
As his eyes scan the complex instructions and cryptic symbols, a particular recipe catches his attention, intrigue somewhat subding his discomfort. "Here's somethin’," he murmurs, his voice just managing to keep his uncertainty under wraps. “'Whisperwind Tonic,’” Sam scrunches his face up, his brow furrowing in concentration as he reads the intricate script.
“Grants the drinker the ability to move unseen and unheard for a short period of time.” He scoffs at the page, subconsciously rubbing his injured hand against the corner of the notebook in an attempt to relieve the subtle ache that’s beginning to radiate from the centre of his palm. 
“Bullshit.” She snorts, putting a bottle back to its rightful place on the shelf in front of her.
“Right.” He clears his throat as he continues to peruse the notebook's contents. Did he eat something funny?
“Keep going. I’m intrigued.” She turns around, making her way towards him to take a peek at the book herself.
His eyes narrow as he faces her, her proximity suddenly more pronounced, the surrounding heat sending him into a slightly dizzying haze. He shakes off the feeling, rolling his shoulders before reading again.
"There’s... potions to manipulate memories... truth elixirs. Nonsense. All this stuff for people who can’t get laid. Probably just a bottle of rohypnol, right? I mean, how else can someone make a ‘passion elix--”
He coughs suddenly, choking on his words before looking at her with some sort of incredulous bewilderment that makes her stop in her tracks.
“What?”
“Jesus, girl. You got enough perfume on?”
“I don’t- what do you mean?”
He scoffs, grimacing. “Whatever you’ve got on? Ease up on it, next time, huh?”
She grumbles, hopping up onto the table beside him, pulling the collar of her jacket up to her nose. She sniffs. It smells like nothing. Just… her. Not good, not bad. She kicks his shin playfully.
“If you think I smell like shit, just say. It’s been a long day.”
“Nah, you don't…” He scratches his palm again, a faint frown creasing his brow as he notices a faint discolouration at the centre. He rolls his wrist to determine whether or not it was just a trick of the light. “You smell really good, actually.” He speaks, though it’s like he’s unaware he’s said anything.
She does. Good enough to eat, in fact, and as she leans in, resting her chin on his shoulder with an amused smirk on her face, Sam's line of sight is dragged from his hand to her eyes, narrowed slightly by her bemused smile. His vision blurs slightly and his brows furrow as he struggles to refocus.
She inquisitively tilts her head, and slowly, he finds his eyesight refocusing on the part of her neck left exposed between her hair and the collar of her jacket. It looks soft. Smooth.
Inviting.
The gentle glow of colour coming from the shelves behind them, reflecting off of her skin mesmerises him, and he finds himself wondering what it would be like to bury his face in the curve of her neck, to dig his fingers into its nape, and let his teeth leave small, speckled bruises behind, to hold her in place and breathe the sweetness in as her breath cools his skin. It's an urge, almost. Raw and overwhelming.
One that he quickly snaps out of.
His cheeks flush as he realises the deviance of his own thoughts, the suddenness of it all leaving him... reeling, to say the least.
“Okay, Romeo.” She teases. “Sometimes I think we’re lucky that this line of work doesn’t have an HR department.” Her voice feels like a hug and a punch to the jaw at the same time, nonetheless, her giggle pulls him back to reality, his attention snapped back to his aching palm.
He frowns deeper, a faint purplish hue beginning to emerge at its centre, subtle discolouration spreading slowly like tendrils of ink on cotton, becoming more pronounced by the second.
He swallows hard, the thickness of the scent oozing down his throat still, leaving him momentarily breathless.
"I, uh..." he stammers, his mind racing to find an explanation for the sudden onslaught of whatever-the-fuck-just-happened, whilst all the layers on him begin to feel like cling film. It’s irritating. It hurts, even.
Her smile falters a little. “I’m… just kidding- hey, you good?” She reaches for his wrist to see what keeps grabbing his attention.
“It’s nothin’, forget it," he stammers, voice a little strained as he closes his sore hand into a fist. He shakes her off of him with an unconvincing snort in a poor attempt to save face.
His attempt at self-preservation only causes her to mirror his embarrassment, and as Sam feels the scent dissipate slightly, an uncomfortable tension takes its place.
He watches her eyes narrow in the corner of his vision, suspicion flickering in their depths as she studies her companion's sudden unsettled demeanour. 
“Right.” she mumbles, slapping her thighs awkwardly. “Well… I’m not one to waste perfume on a job. Especially with you for company, so…” her voice trails off, waiting for what she thinks is an inevitable clapback. It doesn’t come. Her face reddens as her eyes move around awkwardly, though fortunately, he’s too focused on turning the pages of the book to notice.
”Hey.” She says, prodding his temple with her forefinger. “You… sure you’re okay?”
Sam flinches at her touch, a jolt shooting through him as he sniffs to maintain his composure, standing up to distance himself.
“Mhm,” he replies hastily, his gaze darting away from hers as his mind races to find a plausible reason behind the overwhelming sensation. “Yeah, yeah, fine…just- think I ate…” God it’s hot. “-Damn jacket.” He grunts, putting the book down to tug the denim off of an arm, shaking it off of the rest of him impatiently.
She hops off of the stone and backs away, a perplexed laugh escaping her.
“Don’t be evasive!”
“What? It’s…I’m hot. Shit.” Sam mutters, his irritation mounting as he tries to regain control of the situation. He scratches the palm of his hand, and, with a sigh, moves further away from the stone counter, throwing off another layer.
Left in his t-shirt, she gawks at him as he preoccupies himself by looking at his hand once more.
“Samuel, It’s like… sub-zero in-”
“Look. It is warm. I am warm.” He scrunches up his hand with a sigh, frustration progressing strangely fast as he cuts her off. “So, I’ve taken my jacket off. That a problem?”
Her grin falters. She awkwardly teeters from side to side as she decides to keep quiet.
“I could smell… somethin’, thought it might’ve been you, now it’s gone. Just…” He trails off, taking a deep breath as he tries to steady himself. Tilting his head up to the ceiling, he basks in the brief recess from the sweltering heat clinging onto his body, “Just…park it. Please.”
She frowns, her gaze lingering on Sam for a moment longer before she holds her hands up defensively, dismissing the strange encounter with a slow nod as she turns her head back to the shelves.
“Parked. Dick.” she retorts, a façade of amusement decorating her tone in an attempt to lighten the mood, covering the awkward swallow and slight flush in her cheeks one might get after being scolded by a teacher in front of their class. Meanwhile, Sam fixates his attention back onto the notebook in his hands.
As he continues to flip through the brittle parchment, a developing sense of unease begins to tighten his chest. From the corner of his eye, he watches her hop off of the table, tightening her ponytail as she ambles awkwardly back over to the shelves. He parts his lips to apologise, but a painful pulse coming from his hand re-diverts his attention.
He squints between his hand and the intricate symbols and arcane diagrams, words written in faded text, but just as he begins to take it in, he feels himself struggling to focus.
That same sickening sweetness from moments ago slowly assaults his senses again; it’s like a thick, unshakable mist, seeping into his nose, clinging to his throat and settling heavily in his lungs.
Attempting to clear his throat without drawing her attention, Sam shakes his head, a slight furrow forming between his brows as he does so. The back of his hand instinctively rests against his nose, as if warding off the unexplained, worsening discomfort. 
"You…” he swallows, the room seemingly closing in on the tension his outburst had created, “Y’sure you're not wearing perfume or something? Jeez, it’s givin’ me a headache," he mutters with a meekness that she finds irksome.
She scoffs in irritation. "Oh my God, no! What are you talking about?" she retorts, pointing emphatically toward the shelf of vials, her impatience palpable as his attention remains surgically attached to the notebook. “Will you focus?” She looks back at the shelf.
Five of the vials remain untouched, surrounded by that same soft glow he was fixated on moments ago. 
“We need those ones, right?”
Sam, however, remains frozen, his eyes now locked onto a specific page.
“Id. The word- it wasn’t a… damn abbreviation.” Freud's structural model of the goddamn psyche.
“Huh?” She prods, arms folded, brows arched.
“Freud…Id and ego.” Unable to detach his attention from the inked pages, he ignores her as his lips move silently, mimicking the phonetics of the symptoms written on the frail parchment.
The pinprick- sore, burning now, in fact- has become the centre point of a spider's web of dark hairline veins, matching the worrying description in front of him. His gaze shifts between the book and his own hand, a growing realisation drilling into his brain as he watches the deep colour reach his wrist. This is when he remembers the engraving on the lever. Id. the insatiable id, the book says. He scoffs at the audacity of it all. Wonderful!
His own blood flow pulses through his ears, clouding him with more anxiety and indignation, and dread pitches in his gut-
"Sam!"
"What?" He snaps, abruptly smacked back to reality as her irked voice pierces through his fearful focus.
As her gaze settles on him, flustered, brows knitted together in vexed concern, she momentarily holds back her annoyance, her brows furrowing as he blinks, attempting not to entertain the gravity of the situation unfurling in front of him.
 “Jesus, are you PMSing or something?” Her sarcasm goes hand in hand with her raised brow, smirk combo, amused disbelief taking her over. Yet, her own annoyance gives way slightly to genuine worry as she observes the uncharacteristic vulnerability in his expression. "What’s in that stupid book that’s got you so worked up?"
She looks… good. When she's flustered. Annoyed. The flyaway hairs and the frown. He supposes she thinks she looks intimidating. It's having the opposite effect- nope. No. That's enough. 
"I’m not-'' he fumbles an attempt at trying to reassure both himself and her. "Just…” he clears his throat again, the musky sweetness still violating his respiratory system as his eyes twinge with guilt at his sudden attitude change. “Nope. Doesn’t matter." Quickly closing the notebook, Sam clutches it under his arm, straightening his posture, and offering a nod and an awkward smile. “I, uh, didn’t mean’ta…” He trails off, a soft haze forming over his vision. 
She's not stupid. She sees the growing urgency in his eyes that hints at a deeper worry, and it makes her huff. Why can’t he ever just say what he’s thinking? Or, perhaps better, apologise properly?
She sighs and shakes her head. She spends far too much of her energy stressing about him and his wellbeing, when he probably couldn't give a shit about her outside of a job. Enough self sabotage.
“Whatever…can you… get me up to those shelves? Place is starting to give me the creeps.”
Should he show her the book? He looks back to the dark colour continuing to weave through the veins in his palm.
He considers the danger he’s in- that she’s in, if this isn’t, in fact, total bullshit. His blood flow picks up the pace, and he gets hotter. His mouth feels tight. Wet and dry at the same time. God, he feels sick-
“Oh my God, Sam, snap out of it!” She steps closer to him, making him stiffen in apprehension. “I need to get on your shoulders. Focus, please.”
Please. Please please please- the rasped desperation lodged at the back of her throat makes him shudder. He wants to hear her say it again and again and again-
“Do I need to smack you?” The thought of her palm thwacking against his cheek slices through his thoughts, her voice low, bordering irate. He swallows again.
A strained shake of the head is all he can manage in response, and the urgency of their situation propels him into action- if they could just get out of here, he can distance himself. Fresh air cures all ailments, no?
"Alright, just-" he mutters, voice tight as he takes a hesitant step closer, throwing the book to the ground and kicking it aside. His stare flickers briefly to the discoloured veins now reaching his fingertips, and he swallows in silent acknowledgment of the dangerous path he seems to be treading. Still, with a deep breath, Sam carefully lowers himself to a knee, jaw clenched, skin clammy as he beckons her over.
Oblivious to the tumult going on inside him, she moves, adjusting her stance over him. His hands find support on her hips as she sits on his shoulders, but as their skin brushes directly for no more than half a second, his breath catches and he almost chokes.
“You okay?” She asks out of obligation, looking down at him warily.
Sam inhales deeply, nodding in response, jaw clenched, desperately trying to ease up his heart rate as he pushes himself up, raising her to the height she needs.
He tries to steady himself, but as every sense intensifies to an unfathomable degree, he has no choice but to close his eyes to try shutting them out.
Sam can feel the rhythmic rush of her pulse resonating through him, every beat amplifying that strange suffocating sweetness that continues to overwhelm his senses whenever he’s close to her.
“Hurry it up.” He winces.
“Pot, kettle, black.” She retorts, leaning forwards, backpack unzipped as she reaches for the first vial, and as the softness of her voice reverberates through him, his spine is graced with a shiver.
As she reaches up, her body shifts slightly, and he tightens his grip to keep her steady. He can’t help but notice the way her breath hitches, just for a second. It’s a small sound, almost imperceptible, but it makes his chest tighten with a fierce, protective… is it desire?
"Almost there," she says, her voice a little breathless from the fear of falling off of him. "Just...keep still."
"Doin’ my best," he murmurs, his voice rough with suppressed emotion. He wonders if she can feel it too—the electric current. A persistent, dull thrum tugging and squeezing and pulling at every cell and synapse in his body.
Her thighs tighten around him ever so slightly as she reaches for a further vial; the fabric covering them brushes against his ears, the sensation overwhelming enough to make him grunt and dig his fingers even deeper into the flesh of her hips.
As he does so, the details of her body become vividly apparent beneath his fingertips– every fibrous contour of muscle, the softness of fat, the rush of blood beneath her lycra-clad skin– his senses are heightened to an almost unbearable degree, and his head turns sideways as he tries to steady his shaky breathing- the dichotomy of duty and… maybe temptation… playing out in a near-excruciating loop in his mind.
He feels a pull. His nose- his mouth, are lured towards her inner thigh. He swears his stomach growls at the scent of her. If only he could taste her. Drink her down- devour her until he drowns- Shit. No. No-- they need to wrap this the fuck up. Get the hell out of here.
“C’mon.” he grits- whether it was more to her, or his way of trying to pull himself together, he doesn’t know. He lays his head against her thigh, willing for it all to be over.
He wants to yell at her- tell her to stop being so inquisitive-- to stop finding the need to read the labels on the fucking vials she’s still gathering, but if she speaks back to him again his knees might just give.
You're going to be fine, he unconvincingly tells himself. That's what you do. Deal with things. More importantly, she’s going to be fine. Fresh air, he thinks again, they’ll be out of here soon.
Sam’s eyes begin to glaze over again, fingers pressing ever-so-slightly deeper into her as he tries to keep his vision focused.
He’d be able to control himself, he’s sure of it. He’d stare down at the floor as they both retrace their steps out of the crypt, in his head repeating the notion that whatever’s affecting him will just… go away- it’ll be fine if he just pushes through it, it’ll be fine if he just pushes through it-- diminishing any thoughts of how easy it would be to grab her whilst she walks just ahead of him, blissfully unaware of what he wants to do to her.
Oh. What he wants… to do to her.
Pinning her against the wall. Tearing through that perfectly stitched seam on her leggings right between her thighs before even giving her a chance to react, or, God forbid, to protest before he breaks her in.
He absentmindedly licks his lips.
Thoughts of the financial reward, the glory of finding this place- fulfilling their client’s desires, blah, blah, fucking blah, fade into the background as a primal spark flickers deep. The awareness of the perilous temptation turns into some sort of hypnotic drumbeat in his head, rational thoughts singed at the edges, slowly burning into ash and flaking away into thin air.
As his nose and mouth press against her inner thigh, the tension peaks and he becomes overwhelmed by her; Sam's breath quickens, and a possessive hunger simmers behind his eyelids.
His lips part, brushing against her, teeth grazing against fabric- an exploration that hovers on the edge of giving in to something far removed from sanity.
Feeling a warm tickle, she diverts her attention from the shelves in front of her to Sam’s head between her legs.
She swallows, a fleeting pull in her core as she takes in the sight of his fingers dug deep into her hips, but quickly shrugs it off in favour of understanding why the hell he’s breathing so heavily against her, and why on earth his mouth is pressed against her leg.
Sam inhales, opening his mouth wider, taking shallow breaths.
Then, he bites. 
It’s a feral snap into temptation he was trying so hard to fight against.
As his teeth clamp down into the meat of her thigh, she squeals, wobbling, then falling back and off of his shoulders, her skin grazing harshly, simultaneously snapping him out of whatever sick trance he'd fallen into.
“Fuck!” She shouts as her body thuds against the ground. She painfully drags herself into a sitting position, face contorted into an expression of complete disarray as he gawks at her, horrified.
“Shit- are you-” Sam rushes over to see if she’s hurt, but as his hand brushes against her shoulder, he has to fight against himself in order to suppress a groan. It’s too much. He painfully wrenches his hand away, subduing his own body's desire to keep it there. He cowers back. “Oh, God.”
One hand cradling the back of her head whilst the other pulls at the fabric of her leggings, she frowns, cracking her neck and rolling her shoulders uncomfortably as she leans herself away from him.
Wide-eyed frown fixed to her face, she checks her hands for blood. Nothing, thank God, other than a dull ache that sears through her upper thigh.
“Did… did you just fucking bite me?!” She asks, voice quiet, dipped in anger.
Sam doesn’t reply. He’s shaking, hand clasped to his forehead as he glares at the floor, unable to bring himself to look at her. His hand obscures his vision and he breathes heavily at the sight; the purple steadily darkening into the veins in his wrist, fading into his forearm. The book is right. And he’s absolutely fucked.
Meanwhile, she double takes. Sam, leggings, Sam, leggings. There’s a slight fray in the fabric.
She pulls herself to her feet, wincing at the all-round ache in her body, astounded.
“What the hell is up with you?!” She hisses at him, taking a step closer before he holds a hand out defensively.
“I- I’m- no, stay over there, I… I don’t know. I don’t-” He splutters, doubling over as if he’s been punched in the gut as she gets closer. He stumbles backwards, back smacking against the stone table with a force that makes him grunt. “Somethin’- something’s happening t’me.” He rasps, wide eyes glued to the palm of his hand.
“Yeah, no shit.” She spits, looking at her leg again. “You broke the fucking skin- how-” Her voice is tinged with exasperated irritation… that quickly morphs into extreme concern when she finally takes in his appearance. “Jesus. W-what is going on with you?”
Sam’s sweating, despite it being cold enough to see their own breath, his sleeves clinging to his arms, fabric glued to his torso as his chest heaves unsteadily. His eyes are wide, and as they traverse away from his palm, down his body, it’s clear that they’re wide in realisation. 
“You-” He’s fucked. Which means she’s fucked. How on earth is he supposed to explain what’s going on here? “You’ve gotta go.”
She huffs, ignoring his plea. “Do you need… water, or something? Painkillers?” She asks, panic creeping into her voice, dropping to her knees as she throws her backpack to the ground. She holds it open, hands ferreting around for her water bottle, clattering around the vials that miraculously remain intact, whilst Sam’s eyelids grow heavy.
“N-no.” He shakes his head, turning back to her to make sure she’s unharmed, but as soon as he looks at her, he’s unable to avert his gaze from the fullness of her thighs as she kneels. “God.” He mumbles, salivating.
Jesus fucking Christ, he’s losing himself.
He musters the strength to force his eyes shut, and it hurts. Every part of his body wants her. To look at her, to touch her, to… taste her, even- but the slither that remains of his weakened mind can't allow it.
Shaking her head, she retrieves her flask. “Here. You’re sweating.” She says, walking over to him. “It’ll cool you down.”
Sam swallows a whine, and lowers himself fully down to the ground with a self-loathing groan, hunched over, eyes squeezed shut as he attempts to drive out all sorts of depraved, wanton thoughts that keep flitting in and out of his head unprompted.
“N-no. Don’t come near me.” his hushed murmur comes out gravelly as she wearily dips her head down to meet his eye line, concerned at how he’s lowered himself to the ground. She takes a nervous breath, kneeling to his level as he lets out a defeated sigh.
He keeps his view of her hidden by his arm as she extends her own, ignoring his plea to instead tilt his chin up and hold the flask up to his lips. He shudders, his whole body trembling as his eyes unwillingly fix on hers, cursing under his breath at the touch of her cool hand on his skin. His gaze draws lower to her waist, her hips, her soft stomach- his hands clenched tight into his jeans as he fights against the impulse to lunge at her.
She tilts the flask and upwards and watches his throat bob as he swallows. She swallows too, almost choking on her dry throat. The longer she looks at him, the more the chill in her bones dissipates- the more she feels warmth seep into her bloodstream.
Her skin against his feels like molten metal, and he shakes with the ever-growing impulse to grab hold of her. To touch, and to be touched. He pushes the flask away in a brash attempt to get her away from him, then holds his breath as he tries to focus on the small bit of reprieve the cool water has granted him, even if it is no better than a bucket thrown over a forest fire.
“Any better?” No answer. She huffs, screwing the lid back on before backing up a little. “Can I trust you to get me back to the window so we can get out of here, or are you gonna bite my other leg, too?”
“Can’t-” Sam blurts panicked, eyes wide as his head darts in her direction.
“Oh my-” She laughs mirthlessly, strenuously rubbing her face before eyeing the room to see what else she can come up with. “Where’s that book?”
No. He’s going to throw up. He can’t let her find out. If he just waits it out, everything will be fine. His gaze moves to where he’d kicked the notebook- just under a shelf. Out of sight, out of mind, right?
“Jesus chr- where’s the notebook, Sam! The one you were reading!”
Unfortunately, her eyes follow suit, and as she catches a glimpse of the frayed leather binding, she crawls towards it.
He watches in a sort of trance-like state as she flattens herself against the ground, moving her torch around underneath the dusty shelves in search of the book he’d kicked under them minutes ago. “If you’re not going to tell me, I’ll look for answers myself.”
This is perfect. He could go for her right this second. Pinning her down would be easy- she's so small compared to him. So weak. A pretty little lamb, all ready for him to slaughter. He suppresses a moan at the thought.
“Got it.” She jumps up, fragile book in hand, and he smacks himself in the face with a grunt.
Revolting. Selfish.
She starts flicking through the pages, face riddled with ire as Sam's breath hitches. “No. Don’t- don’t look in th-” He lets out a panicked whimper as his body reacts to the feeling of his shirt peeling on and off his skin; he starts to hyperventilate. Clasping his hand over his mouth as he strains painfully against his jeans, he winces. “Shit.” He swallows, covering his face with his hands as he leans back against the stone. 
She watches his Adam's apple bob as he quietly gulps down air in an attempt to calm himself down.
“You’re hardly in any position to tell me what to do.” She reads; pages upon pages of notes and diagrams elude her as she takes cautious steps towards him, but as his hands shoot out to stop her coming closer, she stills, and takes him in.
She notes the uneasy tremble, the sheen of sweat, flushed cheeks, and the uncharacteristic panic. Perhaps even more alarming than the complete absence of his calm and collected nature is the wispy nebula of blackcurrant-purple bleeding outwards from the more concentrated black in the centre of his palm, up into the veins leading towards his elbow.
She steps closer.
"Don't." He snarls, flecks of frightened spittle coming through his teeth. And this time, she does as she’s told.
She exhales shakily, eyes fixed on the sight of his hand- she swears she sees the dark wisps expanding.
"I- I need to find out what that… purple shit is."
She keeps flicking through, rubbing at her thigh as it twinges with discomfort.
"Yeah, well," He mumbles through gritted teeth, shoulders heaving as if he's fighting the most ferocious of fevers. “Sometimes ignorance is bliss.”
"Ignorance is only making things worse." She snaps, fingers desperately frittering between pages of Casimir's stupid fucking disintegrating notebook. "Why don’t you just tell me what’s happening?" She laughs- no mirth in sight, eyes watering as her head throbs and her insides churn with dread. “Tell me what’s going on. I bet I can fix it.”
“You can’t fix- Shit, there’s that goddamn smell again.” He laughs ironically, before hissing in discomfort and writhing slightly.
She rests the book on the stone desk with a frustrated grunt, holding it open with one hand whilst the other arm wrestles off her jacket absentmindedly, sighing in relief as the cool air ventilates under her t-shirt. She shakes her head in disbelief before flicking to the next page.
She looks at Sam dead in the eyes, trying to steady her own heart rate as she does so in hopes he’ll pass her red cheeks off as some sort of side effect of the cold. Cold. It was cold a second ago, wasn’t it? 
As soon as she looks back at him, a stifling humidity continues to build. It must be the intensity and the… abruptness of the situation. She goes to remove her jacket, until she realises it’s already off. She feels like she’s wrapped in a layer of plastic- hot, flustered, and her leg fucking kills- This is the last time she lets herself get so… pent up over him.
“You’ve- gotta go.”
“Go?” She huffs, annoyance permeating her tone. She shudders, her face running even hotter, his voice alone enough to render her knees weak, and her throat tight. “You'd love that, wouldn't you? Ever the hero. Asshole.”
“No, I- Fuuuck!” He groans loudly into his fist, trembling. Admittedly, it unnerves her, so she turns her attention back to the book, fingers scrambling from dog-eared page to dog-eared page.
“So, you’d rather I let your stubborn ass stay here, suffering from- who knows what- ow, my God.” She hisses, the urgency and irritation in her voice making a return as a dull ache throbs through her thigh. 
“You can’t be near me.” He mutters into his hands as he doubles over, just loud enough for her to hear.
Inhaling sharply, a brief but intense pang of emotion stirs within her, an ache born not only from the profound lack of understanding of what’s transpiring, but also, admittedly, the slight sting of… is it some sort of infantilization? She thought they were over that! They’ve been partners for months now, and he still doesn’t trust her? Why is he trying so hard not to let her know what the problem is?
And then there's the rejection, of course. That hurts almost as much as her developing headache.
“Well, unfortunately, I have to be near you. I can’t get out.” She points to the stained glass window. “I need you to get me up there-” He cuts her off abruptly with an irritated grunt, jaw clenched in warning.
“I can’t!” He shouts.
“Why?” She shouts louder, stepping closer again.
“Stop-”
“Don’t tell me to stop-'' She follows his eyeline, landing on the writing on the window that he’s transfixed on again. “Firmitudo Intus- what?” The script grates clumsily out of her throat as she rubs feverishly at her sore leg. “Tell me what it means! What’s wrong with you?!”
“S-stability in- in balance. How- ughh, shit- how the pressure plates worked.” Sam huffs, words punctuated with a flurry of uncomfortable grunts. “Why can’t you-- ah, God dammit- just take a hint!” He groans loudly into his fist, trembling.
“Take a hint?!” She spits, voice wavering. “Screw you! Just tell me what's going on- or, or better off- tell me the fact that you can't stand the sight of me."
“No, no, no- stay there— It's not like that, I- you don't get it, it's —”
“Spell it out for me then! Stop being so fucking secreti-”
“I’m going to fucking jump you.” He bellows, his face twitching as a wave of blistering, blistering heat courses through him. His fingertips dig painfully into the stone behind him, finding leverage.
She ogles him, bewildered.
Then, after a moment, she guffaws, her fear momentarily usurped by such a ridiculous statement.
In that moment, as she mocks him, Sam feels a surge of strength shoot through him, perhaps a side effect of his desperation not to face further humiliation. It's as if some dormant force within him has been nudged awake, overpowering his rational mind, and with a grunt, he drags himself upright against the table; movements fluid. Predatory.
“You’re going… to jump me?” She sneers, her voice low, teeth bared in a sour smile as she turns to the window, momentarily considering how to get up there herself. “Hah! Of course you are. Any threat to avoid telling me what’s happening, huh? You're such a-”
Her insults die in her throat as she’s shoved harshly into the wall. The fragile book slips from her fingers, thudding onto the floor.
She stares up at Sam, wide-eyed and startled. His painful grip on her wrist, the back of her head pulsating after colliding with so many hard surfaces- it’s all making her ears ring. His grip is firm and bruising as he pushes himself onto her, his stare intense. Unrelenting.
“What are you doing?" she stammers, her voice trembling, brows furrowed in frightened confusion.
But Sam doesn't answer. Instead, he leans in closer, his breath hot against her skin, eyes locked onto hers with an unsettling intensity that makes her stomach flutter. She can feel his heart pounding against her chest as he presses into her, matching the now frantic rhythm of her own as heat radiates off of him.
Sam's certain he can hear her blood flow as he holds her gaze, his senses heightened to the point of overload. The warmth emanating from her skin, the rapid rhythm of her pulse beneath his fingertips, and the heady, sickly sweet scent of her- it’s all driving him to the brink of madness.
“What… the hell are you doing, Sam? Let go.” she whispers, her other hand tentatively going for him in an attempt to wrench herself free, though, with an instinctive speed, he captures her other wrist, pinning it on the other side of her head as a startled gasp leaves her lips. She struggles against his grasp with an anxious whimper, but he only tightens his hold, his wild expression a frightening mix of confusion and horror. Yet his grip on her remains tight. 
"Make it stop-," he stammers through his tightened jaw, his voice trembling with remorse. "I don't know what… I didn't mean to- I need-” A wave of dizziness washes over him as he speaks, a growing tightness in his chest, threatening to send him spiralling into oblivion- he feels like he’s going into cardiac arrest.
Her eyes are wet with anxiety as he cages her in, brows wavering as if she’s attempting to prevent herself from tearing up.
But he’s frozen. Mind rapidly toing and froing between wanting to let her go, and wanting to see her cry. What he’d give to see her eyes brimming with tears, his fingers tight against her scalp while her lips grow swollen, drenched by her own drool as he rams himself down her throat. “I can’t- I can’t stop thinkin’ about… Jesus, the things I wanna do to you.”
His fingers tighten their grip further, pushing himself harder against her, keeping her painfully upright against the stone. Their eyes meet once more as her own chest starts to heave. God. The way he’s looking at her. It’s… carnal.
Amongst this sudden yo-yoing of fear and confusion, she feels herself heat up more, a cramping feeling tugging at her abdomen as he stares at her, breathing deeply- slowly.
“What?” She just about manages to rasp, lips parted, wrists aching, head pounding. “What are you talking about?”
She knows exactly what he's talking about. She can feel him pressing against her.
“You s- sound like a mouse.” He mumbles as if inebriated, one side of his mouth twisted into an almost malevolent grin that makes her stomach drop as he presses his forehead against hers, rendering her virtually immobile. “So small. So scared.” He mocks with a pout as she shudders. “But you’re not just scared, are you?” He speaks through his teeth, eyes trailing down to watch himself push his hips against her with a deep groan.
The sudden friction sends an embarrassingly high-pitched gasp spilling out from her mouth before her teeth have a chance to trap it. Fuck.
His eyes go back to hers, darkened, pupils blown. “Thought so.” He smirks. “I can pretty much taste you from-” a grunt permeates the end of his sentence as his darkened resolve wavers.
He shakes his head, a sudden maelstrom of panic and culpability in his chest making his eyes water. 
“Not- me. I didn’t mean-” She remains glued to the wall, wide-eyed and disoriented, as he stumbles over his words, her heart racing as she watches him lose balance and fall into her, palms braced at either side of her waist as the vice-like grip on her wrists finally relents. “I’m s-” he hisses, his body burning as if demanding him to succumb to what it wants.
Much to her own dismay, she doesn’t move her freed hands- there’s no attempt to push him away again. She’s so caught up in the shock of how good that felt and all of the confusion and guilt that are beginning to plague her head. She must've hit it hard.
Sam’s hand digs into the small of her back, his shoulders slumping as his fingers slip just beneath the hem of her shirt. His grip is tight and desperate as he drops his head against her chest, leaning into her for support as he whimpers, gasping for air. “I can't help it- I want- to stop, but-” 
She takes in a shaky breath, momentarily paralysed, as if her body and vocal chords are in combat against her brain. There's something hypnotic about the way he's looking at her, something frightening about the desperation and the spontaneous Jekyll-and-Hyde-ness of it all, yes, but equally… satiating… as if this is something her body's been vying for for ages.
She swallows hard at the feeling of his skin on hers, and the soft, needy sounds coming out of him- at his weight keeping her firmly pressed against the wall, and the smell of his sweat, cheap detergent, the gift set aftershave he feels obligated to use that’s making her heart thump even harder.
All such normal things- usually so unnoticeable. But it’s a sudden assault on her senses that she can’t shake off- it clings to her, burning her eyes, creeping up her nose, down her throat, settling in her stomach. It’s grounding. Exhilarating, to the point where she wants to tug him closer and inhale him to the point of suffocation.
And she’s baffled by this revelation. Nauseated, almost. She should be angry with him. Furious. How dare he manhandle, bite, bruise and then withhold an explanation from her. Instead, she can’t help but feel an intrinsic need to keep him as close to her as possible. To see, smell, hear, taste him.
Why is her body reacting in such a way? Why is she soaking wet? 
Sam’s terrified. The thoughts he’s had in the past few minutes have been depraved. Actions violent, and he would rather die than cause her harm, so he’s trying with all his might not to let himself give in. Even if he wants nothing more.
From day dot, she’s been off limits. And he's always stuck to that.
He's aware of how she reacts every time he's pushed their banter a bit too far, leaving her flustered. Every hint of jealousy she's let slip when he's talked about his ‘dating’ life. He knows about her ‘crush’– cute, he thought, but inevitably fleeting, surely. Unlike his own feelings- oh no! They’ve fused to every fibre of his being like hot glue.
This whole situation is nothing but a cruel joke. Like fate has conspired to mock him- to force him into getting his way via a horrible, depraved, manipulative circumstance since he's been too much of a pussy to act upon it otherwise. She’s right. He is stubborn. He should’ve let her pull the damn lever. At least that way, she wouldn't be a victim. Or... perhaps less of one.
His stomach lurches and he slumps to his knees, hands maintaining an unstable hold on her hips. He feels pathetic. “Makeitstop.” He heaves again.
He tries to speak again, but as he bucks his hips again, completely against his own will, the blazing friction against his own jeans causes him to hiss, his forehead collapsing against her thigh, eyes wide as he pants for air. “Holy shit.”
She looks down helplessly, shaken and clueless. She watches his hand dig into her thigh, holding it in place as he burrows his face into it.
“You smell so fucking good, I-” He cuts himself off with a groan, shaking his head and pursing his lips. His voice comes out rough again. Dark. Crumbled asphalt, absinthe poured straight down her throat, settling into her bloodstream. “No, no, no…” He just about pulls away to give himself air, eyes flitting up to her, warring between despair and yearning.
The sight of it makes her… warmer still. Hot, even. The bite on her thigh burns as his proximity agitates it. “What should I do?” She rasps, fingers anxiously pulling at the curls by the nape of her neck as if she’s trying to withhold from touching him. “I don’t know what’s… happening.” She whispers, vision losing focus for just a moment.
"I need..." he grunts, struggling to find the words. He weakly tugs at the collar of his t-shirt, but his strength is failing him. "I need you to... take it off... please," he begs, his voice barely more than a desperate whisper.
He looks so pretty like this. On his knees… whining softly, cheeks flushed, his hands grasping at her. It’s so unlike him. Samuel Casanova Drake- reduced to this. The flirtation. The teasing. Getting her all worked up on purpose, only to be reminded that she’s nothing special- that that’s just the way he is. All bark, no bite. Is he being taught a lesson?
She swallows thickly.
She thinks about how it felt when he grinded himself onto her and forcibly suppresses a moan as a pleasurable jolt shoots up her spine, setting her hairs on end. Her head is swimming. This is all so… artificial. So odd. She’s always been attracted to him, but fuck, this is wrong.
She hesitates, her heart pounding in her chest as a wave of guilt-ridden nausea rushes through her. Is- is she taking advantage of him?
“Please.” He repeats, his plea punctuated with a desperate whimper. She blinks, nodding, and with trembling hands, she crouches and reaches for the hem of his shirt, her fingers brushing against his heated skin. Gently, she lifts the shirt over his head, her touch lingering on his arms as she pulls it free.
Sam gasps as the cool air hits his bare skin, a momentary relief from the feverish heat consuming him. He leans heavily against her, his breathing ragged, his body trembling. "Thanks," he murmurs, his eyes closing briefly as he savours the sensation.
She swallows hard, feeling a strange mix of fear and sickening lust fester in her bloodstream. Her hands remain on his arms, steadying the both of them.
"What now?" she asks, her voice barely audible.
Her eyes are drawn to the sheen of sweat covering his body; the way dark hairs lay matted on his chest, softly trailing down his stomach, past fading ink and mottled scars, beyond where his belt keeps his jeans smouldering against his skin.
She watches her own hand rest under his chin, tilting him up to her. It’s like she’s watching it unfold through a TV screen.
Delicate wisps of condensation coming from his parted lips makes her mind wander; What would they taste like? How would the roughness of his stubble feel against her? Her mouth, her neck, her bare stomach, down down down- she's had these thoughts before; fingers delved between her thighs as she stares breathlessly up at the ceiling.
Saliva pools under her tongue as she imagines rutting against his pretty nose and open mouth like a bitch in fucking heat- oh god- her teeth graze her lower lip as her thoughts begin to spiral further than usual- why are they spiralling like this?
She’s sweating.
There’s so much desire- so much insatiable hunger in his eyes alone as he looks at her that it makes her thighs tense together. As she does so, she’s reminded of the bite again. It fucking hurts, snapping her out of her depraved trance; her eyelids flutter unsteadily as she regains focus, her cheeks burning.
His pulse thuds frantically against her thumb, and her nails stroke gently at his skin as his shoulders rise and fall harder, amplifying his restraint which is growing more and more painful by the second. 
“You…” he pauses and grunts, fighting himself as his eyes remain shut. “Don’t… know what to... ugh- hurts. It’s too- too much." Every tiny little touch feels like he’s being swallowed whole. It’s like a cold spring and a flow of lava all at once, and he wants to scream. 
She pulls her hands away, looking at them as though she’s the cause of the problem. Hoping to herself that her sick mind will sort itself out if she distances herself from him.
He shakes, sweat beading off of his chest, blood pumping through him at a dizzying pace as his eyes pine for her.
“N-no.” He’s craving- starving. A trembling hand raises to her wrist, and he winces as his fingers wrap around her. As his fingertips dig into her forearm, the thought of sudden absence of her touch feels like a death sentence. “Don’t.”
He swallows audibly as his body jolts again at the touch. The contact hurts him. Arouses him to such a painful degree, but he’s not letting her get away. He can’t- he doesn’t want to. He’s too far gone.
Sam’s eyes squeeze shut and he screws up his face in some sort of pained internal conflict. He grabs her wrist tighter and she winces, but as he drags her hand back to his face, her eyes follow.
“Help.” he blurts, finally deciding it’s time to bite the proverbial bullet as he sits fully and leans back against the stone table, accidentally pulling her with him. “I need- need you- your help. The last pages- another way to-” He eyeballs the notebook. “Make it stop. Before I hurt you again.”
She picks up the book and kneels. Her thumb swipes across his cheekbone as his hand rests over hers. Her hands on his bare skin are fucking excruciating; he can feel every single ridge of her fingerprints despite her stillness, like thousands of knife edges grazing his skin all at once.
“Okay- I- I’m looking.” She says, and oh, she sounds like velvet. Liquid gold that he just wants to swallow forever and ever and ever. He’s transfixed by her lips as she speaks, absentmindedly snaking his other hand up the nape of her neck and into her hair.
His fingers tighten their grip, gently pulling her head backwards, and with watery eyes he nuzzles into her neck, breathing deeply- slowly. “Hmmm, God.”
His hips buck towards her, and the feeling of his lips grazing over her neck make her swallow hard. She doesn’t need to read the book to know what’s going on. He whispers breathless apologies, guilt making his heart ache whilst he loses control of the rest of his body.
Her eyes continue to flit around the pages nervously, no longer to read, but to hide. This is ridiculous. Her skin hasn’t felt this sensitive before.
Her eyes fall over a likely explanation; a sketch of a lever mechanism, an embedded sharp needle, designed to assault the user of the lever- the intruder, all annotated in scrawled purple ink.
This artifice serves twofold: first, as a deterrent to the audacious; and second, as a penance, a punishment to those who dare disrupt the harmony of my sacred space. May they find the scales tipped; themselves lost within the labyrinth of their own psyche, ensnared by the very primal urges that govern the basest instincts.
She looks at his hand again, and takes in the details written on the page. Primal urge. Base instinct. Her cheeks flush as she converts the words into layman's terms, confirming her theory.
“It’s an… aphrodisiac.” She affirms.
As the wayward thief succumbs, such symptoms shall manifest: The skin shall burn, the point of breach becoming the source of a webbed discolouration as dark as ones fevered desire, and the pulse shall quicken with an infernal craving, subjugating the relentless pursuit of knowledge with the all-consuming tug of the insatiable id. The mind, entangled in the labyrinth of unbridled lust, shall forsake rationality. The thief shall be led astray from their pursuits, ensnared by their own voracious yearnings, knowledge plundered.
Sam hears the uncertainty in her voice as she grapples with the implications of the infection. Their eyes meet for a split second, and he feels a surge of humiliation that’s so unfamiliar to him he’d probably wretch if his mouth wasn’t preoccupied.
She takes in a shaky breath returning to the page again as the pieces begin to fit together.
“S’there another way?” he murmurs into her, the low vibrations of his voice making her close her eyes for a moment. She grunts to herself, forcing her eyes back to the page.
In the safety of companionship, the afflicted may find respite. Should the infection remain unchecked, the heart will strain beyond its limits, ultimately succumbing to the weight of its own longing.
The ‘cure’  is plain and simple. Two people. Balance. Or, by the sound of it, death.
She shakes her head.
The thought of said cure makes her shiver, tongue rolling over her bottom lip.
A coil begins to tighten in her abdomen as he groans into her skin. His hips buck towards her, and the feeling of his lips on her neck make her exhale harshly.
She looks at her leggings as another sore, shooting pain emanates from the bite mark, Sam’s wandering hands peeling apart the small tear in the fabric as his teeth graze against her throat.
Realisation fills her lungs, a bubble forming by her tonsils; the disorienting mix of undeniable, rising pleasure and panic creeping into the forefront of her mind.
Her skin looks mottled, veins deep purple.
Just like his.
The telltale discolouration, mirroring the ominous staining making its way up Sam's arm sends a shiver through her as she comprehends it all. As she watches his brows waver in internal dispute, her own contort in… concern, yes. But also a sense of desperation, wanting to feel more as Sam drags himself more upright with a cracked groan that makes her lips part and her throat seize when she’s pushed harder against him. More importantly, perhaps, the relief from knowing that neither of them can help it. That, for what it’s worth, is a mutual need.
She takes a gamble, grappling with the part-insidious, part-alleviating truth as she looks back to him, legs parting to straddle him properly.
Her chest heaves; the air feels thick, and there’s a strong pulsing ache between her thighs every time her nipples rise and fall, sore and tender underneath her tight sports bra. All of her clothes feel tight, creating tangible friction all over; her whole body, her face, her skin- is clammy and sticky and so fucking overwhelmingly hot.
A small part of Sam is still trying to stop, to control himself, but as he drags himself away from her neck to look at her, it’s clear that this prolonged contact has its consequences; his psyche swells with a sudden growth in appetite as she settles over him, and suddenly, he barely registers that he’s doing anything at all.
Moving his hand to the back of her head, he pulls her closer in a sudden move that draws a gasp from her as her hands brace themselves on his chest- the sudden harshness of his desperate fingers tugging at the roots of her hair is unexpected. The strength coming from this movement alone renders her unable to pull away- even if she wanted to.
He pants harder, unable to let her go, but so afraid of causing her harm all the same. His fingers impulsively flex at her scalp, and she gulps down a whine at the sensation as her eyes squeeze shut.
“I’m- I’m s- I can’t stop. I’m sorry-”
A hand moves from his chest to the back of his neck. With a gentle pull, she guides his gaze downward, her fingers pulling apart the material to trace the mottled purple that’s started snaking across her skin.
Sam's heart lurches in his chest, an undercurrent of panic rising up his throat like bile.
"No, no- what did i do? I-“
“Sam.” She hushes, pressing her forehead onto his, forcing him to stay still- to focus. She silently implores him to find solace in her. “It’s... we’ve just gotta...” Her eyes non-verbally tell whatever flecks of her Sam that’s still in there that she’s here for as long as he needs her to be. That she wants this. She's wanted this. That she’s willing- God, she’s willing.
This is where he feels himself begin to dissolve away completely. Prolonged closeness. Her voice. The heat rising throughout her pretty little face, the growing heaviness of her eyelids, her freckles subdued by an involuntary heat spreading through her cheeks.
And, he can feel the warmth pooling between her legs.
It doesn’t take a genius to realise that this kind of reaction from her is fuelling him. He needs more of it. Craves more of it.
He’s slipping just beneath the surface, but he’s too tired to drag himself up for air. He supposes he doesn’t really need to, now. He could drown in her and die happy.
She’s starting to feel it worsen, too. The ache. The coercion of mind from body.
Her lips brushing against his feels like molten sugar; a searing heat that’s so sickly sweet he can’t pull away despite the blistering heat that’s destined to leave a nasty burn.
“We’ve just… gotta…” she repeats slowly, voice low and speech slurred. She can’t finish her sentence- every part of her is swarmed by the need to close the gap. She has no idea how he’s managed to hold out for so long.
With a shaky exhale, he nods, releasing the tension he's been painfully holding onto, allowing himself to surrender to the overwhelming heat pulsing through him. He finally allows himself to sink under as she plants a tentative kiss on his lips. A kiss which he only returns, though much more urgent- more voracious; it’s like stumbling across an oasis in the middle of the desert- it’s his first sip of fresh water in days, and it makes her eyes widen.
She brings a hand round to the back of his neck, clinging to him eagerly, her thighs spreading further- non-verbal consent, a silent plea for more as she begins to feel the simmering deep in her belly hurriedly rise to a boil.
He grinds himself upwards without a thought, and she whimpers into his mouth. The friction, the sweet, fucking friction has him press back into her desperately, wanting more, sending a groan up from deep in his chest.
He’s gone. Rationality dwindled entirely as the slightest bit of pressure is applied, steadily being replaced with a frightening strength and burning need to have his way no matter the consequences.
She feels her heart rate quicken as she takes in the sight of his pupils. They’re fucking blown out. The pretty specks of amber that normally contrast the darker brown in his irises have been eclipsed by a deep amethyst.
“… want...fu-” Sam’s voice becomes lower still, grating through gnarled teeth, and as his fingertips dig into her back, keeping her in place, he shifts again- he’s so hard, so perfectly angled underneath her- she salivates as she chokes out. “Want to f- fill you up.”
Hey eyes gloss over and her brain numbs. She nods frantically. Heat floods between her thighs with a vengeance, rationality waning as a shockwave shoots through her arched spine. She wants everything to be touched by him.
The third time comes quicker; more brutal, more needy, taking advantage of her lack of composure as she succumbs to his grip, his mouth hungrily taking a dive for her neck again, except this time there’s less restraint. None, even.
“Oh-- sh-mmf-” Her body shudders as she slurs her words, and as his teeth pull harshly at her skin, she cries out into her hand.
Her legs tremble, knees aching as the stone beneath them digs in, breath pitching in her throat as she’s hit with a shamefully sudden climax.
Her wide eyes water as her hand remains clasped around her mouth, chest heaving as she struggles to register how little action it took for her to come, waiting for the pressure to abate and the fog to clear.
Instead, as she feels his hands roam, and watches his frantic eyes fail to decide what to settle on, the fog only thickens, overruling any semblance of critical thinking.
It hits her like a fucking tidal wave, in fact; she can’t fathom anything other than the fact that she needs more.
And in that split second, she surrenders to the pull, inhibitions fizzling away as she leans in, closing the distance between them again with a fierce determination. A surge of adrenaline tips her over the edge and she takes control, seizing him hungrily, fingertips digging harshly into his scalp to bring him back up to her. He protests, growling, biting harder until he feels himself pried away by force, her nails pressing into his jaw, leaving crescents as she gets him where she wants him, lips crashing together again in a tumultuous collision of lust and fervour.
She doesn’t know what to do with herself. She wants everything off- to feel her skin pressed up against his, but the time it would take to unbutton and unzip is a repulsive notion that ignites an almost animalistic frustration within her. The thought of it drives her insane- feverish fingers move from his hair and chin, and instead scramble for his belt buckle, clumsily tugging it apart as his teeth mirror the action at her bottom lip.
The messy exchange of teeth, tongue, and spit takes precedence over Sam’s brain, and he feels himself fall into her, torsos glued desperately together as the heat in his belly burns stronger. Hot blood pumps rapidly to his cock as her choked mewls drag him perilously close to the edge after no more than some mere friction.
His mouth traverses down her chin to her throat, ravenous groans muffled against her skin as he grips onto her for dear life, beginning to feel some give in the confinement of his jeans as she unzips them. She doesn’t even try to pull him away this time- her objective has changed.
He’d swear if he could, but his brain can’t even conjure up letters any more.
His teeth pierce the delicate skin of her neck, and a startled cry escapes her lips as she loses balance and tumbles backwards onto the unforgiving stone beneath them.
Sam looms over her, his weight pressing down until she feels almost crushed beneath him. Only his hand, gripping the back of her head with a fierce intensity that verges on violence, prevents her skull from meeting the ground with bone-shattering force.
His weight bears down on her, the back of one hand planted firmly against the ground underneath her head, while the other moves to maintain its bruising hold on her jaw, thumb hooking around her bottom teeth.
Every nerve in her body seems to betray any remnant of morality as she keens, her thighs tightening around him, trapping him in place as grinds himself against her. He selfishly draws tiny pinpricks of blood from her neck, and she claws at his arm, holding it against him as she bites and sucks what he gives her- almost every inch of her has become an unforgiving erogenous zone; it's all too much but not enough. It’s not enough. Teeth piercing her skin, tongue lapping up the mess- It’s an exquisite sort of agony, and she wants- needs- 
“More.” She murmurs around his thumb- or is it his finger now?
His teeth leave a trail of fire along her collarbone, her jawline, finally settling on her pulse point as it throbs beneath his lips. He grunts in response. There, he bites down harder, eliciting a guttural sound from deep within her throat as she struggles to catch her breath beneath him. Every break of the skin permits small bleeds of that relentless purple colour, rendering her virtually feral as she grows increasingly more overruled by the substance.
Rough hands roam beneath her t-shirt, sending goosebumps rising over heated skin as speckled blood bruises settle around her neck wherever his teeth have failed to puncture. To find some semblance of control amongst the chaotic frenzy, her trembling fingers pull at the waistband of her leggings, her urgency matching his own.
Fumbling clumsily, he joins her, his fingers tugging at the fabric with an urgency nigh on feral as his other hand harshly kneads at her waist. God, he wants to dig his fingers into her flesh, to break the skin, tear her apart, and fucking consume her from the inside out.
Before the waistband can even reach her thighs, she’s reaching down, pulling him out, drawing him towards her as a dribble of precum trickles over her fingertips, and he pushes up his torso to watch.
He’s sensitive. So, so, sensitive. In her desperation to pull him closer, she squeezes her palm around his shaft, and he chokes on his sudden gasp, hands smacking hard against the floor to hold himself up. 
Fuck. She wants to hear him do that again.
She grips him harder, stroking up and down with a cruelly tight fist. He’s all breathless whimpers and fluttering eyelids, allowing her to revel in the sounds as he drinks in the sight of her hand wrapped around him.
He shudders, undone, from virtually nothing, shaking violently and audibly moaning behind pursed lips. He can’t even think to muster up a verbal warning before he comes, pearly hot liquid spurting over her hand, dripping down onto her stomach. Yet, similarly to her, there’s no comedown. No time for shame about such a short build up. He’s still hard, red hot and weeping, body vying for more as his eyes glue themselves to the mess he’s made on her t-shirt, seeping through to her skin- Christ, her skin-
He’s hooked; her plushness, every recess and every convex curve, how her t-shirt clings to her stomach, made tacky by him. If it were possible, he’d cover her in him just so he could spend minutes watching it drip and bead and roll across and in-between her soft, smooth, warm skin. Sam’s so mesmerised that he barely even takes in the fact that he’s pushed her t-shirt up, his tongue and teeth licking and pulling at her stomach until his hips buck harshly at the saltiness of her sweat mixing with the flavour of his own stickiness. He shudders.
Her hands slide and scramble, clumsily unhooking her bra, scraping her knuckles on the floor beneath her before pulling it all off, over her head; all just in time for his mouth to open and cram as much of her left tit inside as he can. Sam sucks with a ferocity that’d be frightening if this wasn’t a shared affliction, rutting his hips sporadically against the bunched up fabric of her leggings rolled down to her thigh.
Her nipples are hard, sore, aching, and the pressure of his teeth rabidly biting and pulling, contradicting the soothing warmth of his tongue rolling in tandem, make her jaw go slack and her brows knit tightly together as she tries to navigate the fluctuating sensations.
Her hands slide over the back of Sam’s neck and down his shoulder blades, to his waist, his hips, sticky fingers stretching, running over hairs and scars and flexing abdominal muscle as they reach for his cock, slick, swollen, and heated as it meets her palm. Squeezing him closer to her, Sam groans, mouth pausing its assault on her chest, face falling flat into it, bucking harshly as she impatiently pulls him close, close, closer, writhing restlessly ’til her leggings are low enough for her thighs to part enough to let him in.
Incoherent, mumbled moans are hummed and panted into her tender chest, hands digging into the flesh of her waist as his shaft is squeezed and dragged against her sopping cunt. She moans, a languid, filthy thing as he meets her swollen, sensitive clit, the sodden cotton of her underwear brushing tortuously against it as she brashly pulls them aside.
His impatience builds, fingers digging into her deeper and deeper until they become restless and tug fiercely at her leggings. She hisses sharply as her naked back scrapes suddenly against the floor, her body shunted downwards til one of her legs are fully exposed to air, allowing Sam to hook his knee under hers, pushing up harshly and pinning her thighs apart- access that they’re both burning for. She urges him on with a whine as he pushes down on top of her, words lost to the both of them, communication reduced to vying grunts and desperate writhing.
His pupils dilate enough to make him look feral, purple-flecked irises madly dancing left, right, up, down, as if committing the sight of her, greedy and parched, to memory, before he finally complies, long groan grating out of him as his tip breaches her slightly. He can’t hesitate any longer. His lips part as his thick cock sinks into her inexorably, leaving her completely pliant beneath him. Despite how impossibly wet she is, the stretch is still so intense- she feels like she’s being split in two; it���s both the best and worst thing she’s ever felt, but something she never wants to end.
“S-ss…” She hisses, screwing her face up in frustration as she tries and fails to say his name, nails digging into him more. “Pl-P…” She grunts again, frustrated with her inability to conjure words. Her thighs tremble, the sharp, tight warmth in her stomach tugging and pulling and obliterating every sense as she tightens around him, eyes flickering, rolling back almost painfully as he fills her deep, retracts, and fills again, each time not stopping until he’s buried to the hilt.
For a moment, head spinning, he stares down at the way her head falls back, eyes squeezing shut, arms flopping, knuckles smacking against the ground as she traps a warbled cry behind her teeth, greedily sucking him into her. He grunts, brows drawn together, and thinks he’ll never be sated again like this. It's perfect. If only it weren't manufactured.
Heat sears him apart from the inside out, savage gluttony evident in the way he gasps and he groans when his hips slam forward, over and over, pressed so tightly against her that each movement reverberates astoundingly against her clit. She’s so tight, so perfect, so wet, around him as she whines and bucks up into him.
Sam holds her down; hand pinning forearm, fingers digging deeply into stomach and waist, knee prying thigh from purple-stained thigh, pumping into her at a relentless pace; She groans as he harshly works her open, arching into him as her stomach tightens— tighter, tighter, tighter, until she’s screaming, unpinned arm smacking into his back, nails clawing crescents into his sweat-slicked skin as another wave of arousal floods every sense of her being.
She can’t breathe- she doesn’t want to- the energy needed to do so would take away from the white hot pleasure coursing through every inch of her. Liquid gushes, her cunt clamping down hot around him and squeezing, milking him so tight it makes him choke on his own sharp inhale, so good it burns- it’s almost excruciating. He shudders as he breaks, palm slamming against the floor to hold himself up when he comes, too.
She groans at the fullness and the warmth of him spilling inside her, breath coming out in messy, uneven bursts as she feels herself suck in every drop.
For a moment, she watches him come down from his peak, heavy-lidded eyes grazing over the vulnerable crease in his brow, the way his cheeks flush as he catches his breath above her, and his parted lips- she wants to kiss him. Sweetly. She wants him to let her show him she's not a ‘kid’. She wants to feel what it's like to be wanted by him. She's strong, capable, undeniably and irrevocably attracted to him, and… God… She still feels hot. Despite coming twice- or is it three times, now- the need for more is already becoming unbearable, and she fails to decipher if these thoughts are coming from the chemical festering in her veins, or if they're being made apparent due to its diminishing strength. She stings. Oh, she's a mess.
He’s still hard inside her, twitching, demanding still. The question gnaws at her, but her body burns for more, more, more. He slows above her, the lack of physical stimulation, and the completely deriding overstimulation of her mental state making her eyes water. She wriggles slightly, an impatient grunt echoing around the small room as she tries to roll her hips under him. The stillness of his cock inside her has her mewling, still spasming softly around him.
“S- Sam-” She sputters, eyes widening in realisation of her somewhat rehabilitated ability to speak.
For just a few seconds his mind’s feverish occupation dilutes, replaced with a glimpse of a soft, sated afterglow… he falters, his mouth hanging open like there’s something he wants to say. 
“Mm…more. Need more.” She beats him to it, murmuring between shallow breaths, feeling the rising ache cloud her mind already.
His heart thuds so fast it’s a surprise it’s not sat in his throat- is it gratitude he’s trying to muster? Or, an admission perhaps? “I-” Just like her, the words are fighting to get out of him, but just as he strings a sentence together in his head, he starts to tense again. “Gotta… I- I’m-”
For a second, she feels sympathetic as she watches him war with himself. But her body doesn’t let the sympathy hang about for long, and she finds herself making his mind up for him, tugging him down by the back of the neck, tongue meeting tongue as she ferociously bucks up, calf hooking around thigh to pull him tight against her, giving her leverage to twist her hips and roll them both around.
It burns, the white hot anticipation, and he can barely move. His brain has been dumbed down; near-irrevocably stuck between wanting to split her open again, to keep biting and bruising and claiming, or to actually feel- to savour her in her entirety. His indecisive stupor makes him ache even more, brows knitting together tightly as his mind tries and fails to establish where to go next.
Sam can barely process anything outside of the softness of her sticky palm on his chest, the ridges of her fingerprints and the gentle sharpness each time her nails brush against his skin as she pushes him against the ground. She rolls her hips, soft curses spilling out of her lips as she feels his hands clumsily dig into her ass. He shuts his eyes, head lulling sideways as he swallows hard, choosing to feel.
Grip loosening momentarily, his eyes open at the feeling of her fingers branching up, wrapping themselves around his throat; loose, but just enough pressure that he can feel his own pulse reverberate against her thumb. She squeezes harder, turning him to face her, his head numbing with a pleasurable fizz as his vision transfixes on her.
He's too tired to fight against her- truth be told, he probably wouldn't try if he did have the strength. Jesus, she's so pretty, he thinks. Well that makes a change. Significantly less violent than the thoughts circulating his head earlier. She could squeeze tighter and tighter if she wanted, and he still wouldn't protest if it meant he could watch her, like this, from underneath her. Especially when she comes again, back arching as she moans like a fucking animal- and still she doesn't stop.
“So- you’re-” Between the pressure on his throat, her relentless pace, and his own spasmodic panting, he can barely string a sentence together, “s-damn tight- so good- fuck.”
He finds himself completely and utterly caught up in how tight she still feels around him- how fucking gorgeous she looks with her eyebrows drawn tightly together, eyelids heavy as she ferociously rocks her hips, stomach flexing, tits bouncing- the speckled bruises and drying blood stippled across her neck and collarbones- and then there's a hard pang of guilt; he did that to her- made her bleed- infected her- it's his fault that she's being made to give him this-- exactly… what he's wanted…for months.
He expects the thrumming ache to cloud him over again, but it never comes. Instead, a strange clarity claws its way through the haze of his mind. This is what he has longed for for months, but now that it's here, the moment is tainted by anguish. It took this entire horrible ordeal to force him to act upon his feelings, and he mourns the likelihood that this will be the one and only time he gets to be this close to her.
And then, beneath the sorrow and the dread, there lies a deeper, more corrosive guilt. It gnaws at him, a conscience-grating burden that leaves him nauseous. Despite the mental torment, despite everything, his body betrays him, running rife with boiling hot pleasure. The contradiction tears at him, a cruel reminder of his own skewed morality and the complex, painful nature of his...is it his love for her?
The obscene squelching sounds and the wetness leaking out of her and down her inner thighs, forming small puddles on his skin, and the floor, and, fuck, as she murmurs an exhausted plea, the taste he's getting of being wanted- needed- used by her- it all sends him over the edge.
She whimpers and falls into him, moaning incoherently into the crook of his neck as her fingers tighten, nails scraping against stubble, and-- jesus, he's coming again.
His hands meet her upper back, holding her down as he fills her once more, rasped groans and a string of murmured curses vibrate against her skin as he swallows against her hand. He holds onto her selfishly, savouring the feeling of her weight on top of his- bare skin on bare skin, the way she seeks comfort in him- he's thought about this countless times… and he hates how much he's enjoying the consent-less reality of it.
Her movements slow, becoming sloppier, lazier, her energy dwindling as she tries to chase the release she desperately needs. She whimpers, tears squeezing out of the corners of her eyes, dampening Sam's shoulder as they fall, and she finds her swollen, sensitive clit with one hand while the other moves from his throat to his hair.
He continues to hold her as his sensitive cock twitches inside her, nose nuzzling into her hair as he whispers; "Did you...?"
She shakes her head, a soft whimper coming out of her as she tries to push herself into another orgasm. The sound of his voice. Raw, raspy, quiet in her ears makes her tear up even more, and all of a sudden, her body's pursuit of pleasure has become torturous. She looks at Sam, his eyes clearer, amber flecks of colour visible again, his expression one of concern and exhaustion. Guilt churns in her stomach, sharp and nauseating, as the fog in her mind grows lighter by the second- the physical pain persists.
Her body, still wracked by the effects of the drug, betrays her with every shiver, flush of heat, and every desperate circle of her fingertips. She feels humiliated, the intense need now a source of shame, tucking her head back into his shoulder as she arches her back despite herself. Tears well up in her eyes, and she can’t meet Sam's eyes. "I... I'm so sorry," she whispers, her voice breaking. "I still need to-" she sniffs, "I can't- hurts."
Sam’s heart aches at the sight of her distress, and he nods, one hand smoothing down to her soft hip as the other stays on her back. He breathes in the scent of her hair, wanting to savour the moment- hell, he probably won't see her again if this is how she's reacting before she's fully recovered.
He wants more of her, he knows he does. But he's sensitive… and the clarity is still there. The clarity. The stabbing, blunt, serrated knife sawing in and out of his gut that makes him realise that he's never going to have this again. And that none of it was real anyway. But she sobs, and the sting in his chest wanes from his pain to hers. For now, curing hers takes precedence. 
Gently, he pushes against her, and exhausted, she complies, rolling back round to her back, eyes closed, borderline hyperventilating. He pulls her hand from between her legs and she huffs out a shaky breath.
“Sorry…hgnn- I'm sorry.” She whispers, her chest tightening.
He watches her try to cover her face with her forearm, and as he slides out of her, she sobs quietly, tensing her thighs together and rocking her hips softly to try and give her clit the friction it needs as she's left empty.
He rubs the palm of her hand with his thumb, gently lacing his fingers between hers, eyes glued to the way their skin glistens with their mixed arousal. “None’a that.” He says, squeezing her hand as he gently pries her thighs apart. “Not your fault.”
She whimpers up to the ceiling.
“God, it really hurts, Sam.”
“I know, sweetheart.” He holds himself up on an elbow and exhales. His free hand traverses down her torso, giving her waist a reassuring squeeze before reaching between her thighs.
She keens at the nickname, making a shuddered whimper as his fore and middle fingers gather some of the copious amount of shared arousal, rubbing against her carefully.
“This okay?”
Her chin trembles as she nods. “I need more.” She whispers, and almost immediately he pushes two fingers knuckle-deep into her aching cunt, pearlescent slick oozing out onto the palm of his hand down to his wrist. She squeezes his hand instinctively, a groan bubbling out of her throat.
His eyes follow the trail as his fingers stroke her from the inside and his thumb flicks softly at her clit, her soft moans permeating his mind. He's hard again; the thick liquid warms his wrist as it trickles down further, up to where the veins in his forearm meet the inside of his elbow- the veins that were deep purple not too long ago. He looks at his hand, then her thigh; still a small webbing of colour coming from the bite mark, whilst nowhere to be seen on him.
He swallows. There's a soft haze over his brain again, but it's gentle this time. Normal, even, bar the bittersweetness of it all. There's no burn. No malicious desire eating away at him… He just wants to savour her; to soothe, to make her feel better. She looks so ashamed. He wants to take that away from her.
Sam glances back up at her, eyes shut and arm crossed to cover her chest and it feels like a kick in the stomach. He purposely slows his hand, and her eyes open.
Before she can choke out another plea, he leans over her again, pressing his lips to hers gently, slowly building up his hand’s pace as he feels her sigh heavily. His chest thuds as he takes the time to memorise the softness of her lips, acknowledging that this might be the only time he gets to be so soft with her. It breaks his heart- another unforseen circumstance.
Her stomach flutters as he kisses her, the unexpected softness of it making more tears prick at her eyes as he works her closer to her peak. She moves her arm from her chest back to his hair, gently massaging his scalp.
After a moment, he moves from her lips, gently licking and pecking at each bruise and break in her delicate skin, relieved that there's no more purple, but unable to shake the guilt as he mutters apologies interspersed with each break for breath.
She squeezes his hand back, her whole body tensing.
His mouth traverses lower; down her sternum, all the way to her lower abdomen, until he reaches the tops of her thighs, where tacky quickly turns to wet as he moves lower still. Her breath catches as his eyes lock onto hers, and her lips part slightly, a subtle invitation, or perhaps merely surprise, but it's enough to keep him rooted, suspended between action and restraint as he feels himself salivate. In that silence, he waits, desperately vying for the smallest sign of consent.
She winces, her body aching as it waits for release, but she doesn't break eye contact. Instead, she takes a deep breath, and her fingers, trembling, unhook from his and reach out to rest on his jaw, her thumb brushing lightly against his lower lip. It's so brief and gentle it almost feels imagined. Yet, it's there— an undeniable gesture that heats his blood- organically, this time; He tastes them both on her skin and fuck, it's nothing short of heavenly. 
He swallows, eyes flitting around, learning the sight of her by heart before looking back up at her. He licks again and his cock twitches.
With a mixture of reverence and hunger, he closes the distance between them, movements measured and purposeful, each stroke of his tongue filled with a tenderness that belies all of the turmoil eating away inside him.
Her grip on his hair tightens as she sighs up to the ceiling. He loses a little restraint as she breathes out his name, begging him for more, and small, neat licks turn more rabid when his hand wraps around his shaft. He pumps himself with the same intensity as his tongue as it works in and out of her, his soft groans making her hips buck into his mouth as her breaths become more shallow.
She moans- cracked and raspy with exhaustion- at the feel of his lips, his nose, his tongue licking and sucking and savouring the satiating nectar dripping from between her trembling legs. His tongue broadens to gather and swallow before alternating to target her clit with the tip, wet and hot as he laps and swirls and buries in and around her. He tightens his fist around his cock, causing her stomach to roll as he moans into her- it's sloppy and messy and downright vulgar, but there's something so enamouring about his enthusiasm. His forearm wraps under her thigh, pulling her tight against his mouth as he grows closer to another climax of his own, and she gasps and arches even closer.
"Fuck, Sam-I, I'm-" she can feel him looking up at her as she struggles to string a sentence together, using the sight of her to coax his own pain-numbing, breathtaking orgasm. He moans, stimulating her tenfold as he releases warm ropes onto himself, his eyes rolling back as he near-suffocates against her.
He keeps going, and going, even when he lets go of himself to grip her stomach and pin her down- and she almost chokes, unable to breathe as she's utterly overwhelmed by the pleasure and the raw, visceral feelings for him that stabs relentlessly into her heart. She feels the pain raking its way through her body dissipate with each second that goes by.
He's so good. So fucking handsome.
She finally comes, a warbled cry trapped behind her teeth as her eyes squeeze shut and a rapturous wave of coolness floods her body. It's overwhelming- asphyxiating, even; tears streaming, fingers knotting rougher into his curls as he holds her tightly in place, devouring her through and past her climax. He takes and takes and takes-- shit, he loves this.
"S-sam,"
He loves this.
"Agh- Sam, pl- stop-"
He loves this. He fucking loves this- her. He- he loves-
She yanks hard enough on his hair that he's forced away from her with a pained hiss, gasping heavily like he hasn't taken a proper breath in minutes, his entire face from the bridge of his nose down glazed and glistening. He looks so pretty. She aches.
His eyes traverse, conflicted and somewhat melancholic from her thighs, up to her face, and she sees that he's... crying too. It's alien to her. What has she done to him?
She holds his gaze, her own eyes red-rimmed and tear-filled. The regret feels like a physical ache in her chest, mingling with the remnants of aftershock and the soreness between her legs and all over her broken skin across her thigh and décolletage. Despite the excruciating shame, she wants to reach out, to tell him that it's okay, that they had both been caught in the same storm. But the words don't come.
Instead, she sits up ever so slightly, wincing as she scoots closer, their bodies brushing as she nervously pulls his head to her shoulder; a tentative, fragile gesture, but she hopes it speaks volumes nonetheless. He stiffens at first, but eventually relaxes, his arm scooping beneath her to hold onto her gently.
She cradles his head against her, staring at the ceiling with tears pooling at the corners of her eyes. The physical pain was dulled now, but the emotional ache was fierce. She had never fantasised it being like this, tainted by necessity and confusion, and she doesn't know what to do. It's suffocating.
For a moment, they both just breathe, soaking in the sickly, unfiltered aftermath of the whole ordeal.
Minutes pass, or maybe hours—they've lost all sense of time in this weird fucking space where the boundaries have been irreparably corroded. They're cold. Exhausted. Emotionally bare. And now he feels like a damn coward, letting her stroke his hair and cradle him against her chest, after all he's put her through. He grits his teeth in an attempt to keep his watery eyes from spilling over.
But the attempt fails, and he hates how uncharacteristic this is. Screw this place. Screw Cassimir. Screw their client, screw his own greed that brought them here in the first place, and screw- fucking screw her for taking away his ability to remain a husk- and for letting him hurt her.
Finally, she pulls back as she feels her skin dampen and his shoulders jolt ever so slightly, her hand forcing his chin up. Her eyes search for him, and in that moment, she fully takes it in, and sees what she hopes to be the same fear, the same shame, and yet, the same insane level of care that has gnawed at her heart for so long.
Sam opens his mouth to speak as her brows furrow, but no words form, let alone come out, aside from a pathetic, choked sigh that hints at the tumult of emotions stirring inside him. His tongue rolls over his lip, and the lingering taste of them has him shudder and shut his eyes.
He can’t bring himself to look at her, the shame too sickening, too palpable. But then, as he pulls away, getting up to his knees as he fumbles with his jeans, he feels her hand on his arm, steadying him. He looks down, and in her eyes, he doesn't see pity, or accusation, but- and for a second he considers pinching himself- understanding, a non-verbal acknowledgment of his vulnerability.
Delicate and trembling, her fingers reach up to touch his face, tracing the line of his jaw as if to reassure herself that he is real, that this moment, however fleeting and fraught with confusion, was real. At least she'd have it stapled to her memory. Sam closes his eyes at her touch, a self deprecating huff leaving his lips. He turns his head slightly, pressing a kiss to her palm; a silent apology and a desperate plea for reassurance that she's actually thinking what he hopes she is. He even hazards a look to her thigh for any sign of coercion from the drug still coursing through her, but there's no purple in sight.
She reaches one of her arms above her head, just about reaching her shirt. She grunts in disgust, the material sodden, and she drops it back down with a shaky huff, the room's frigid temperature finally having an effect once more.
Sam pushes himself up again, rubbing his damp cheeks with the back of his hand as a sense of normalcy seeps back into his senses. And with that normalcy, grief.
He finds his t-shirt, quickly sliding it over his head despite the excess of sweat and bodily fluid covering both his skin and the material. He grimaces as it clings to him, and she watches on with a poignant shiver, pulling her knees to her chest after adjusting her soaked-through underwear, her boots scraping against the ground as she does so.
He clears his throat, picking up his plaid overshirt from where he'd discarded it earlier before looking over his shoulder at her as he pulls the sleeves through the right way. 
Someone has to speak sooner or later, she thinks, but can't bring herself to. Her nails scratch nervously at her skin as she weighs up what to do, trying not to cry at the prospect of Sam's walls being rebuilt so fast after pouring everything- mind, body, soul- into her moments ago. She feels so naive- so fucking silly-
“What was it you said earlier?”
Her head shoots up as he speaks, caught off guard by how much he sounds like his usual self. Charming, cocky, collected.
She tilts her head slightly, her eyebrows drawing together and her eyes narrowing in a mix of confusion and curiosity. Her lips part just enough to show she's on the verge of speaking, but she holds back, waiting for his next words to clarify the moment.
He extends his shirt out to her, lips quirking into a soft, somewhat reassuring smile. She looks at him for a moment, taking the shirt and putting it on.
“Somethin’ about an HR department?”
She looks at him, a soft laugh fluttering to the surface. It's a quiet sound, tinged with shyness and still wrapped in the lingering sadness of their shared ordeal. Her eyes lower for a moment, the weight of everything that happened settling in.
Seeing her reaction, Sam gets up and moves to where her water flask lies discarded. He unscrews the cap and pours some onto a clean part of his t-shirt. She begins to button her shirt, but he stops her, silently asking for a moment longer.
“Can I?”
She lets go of the shirt, and with gentle, still slightly shaky hands, he dabs the wet cotton softly over her wound-ridden skin.
She watches him, the sadness in her eyes gradually giving way to something softer, his tenderness speaking volumes. As he continues to tend to her wounds, his mouth twists in thought, like there's something he wants to say. So he does.
“I'm sorry.”
He's not the type to apologise, so eye contact is impossible.
“What?”
He continues dabbing at her skin in silence.
“Sam.”
She covers his hand, stopping him from finding any other distraction.
“You didn't ask for this."
He frowns. “I- I just put you through… somethin’ not far off of assault, and your response is-”
“No. Not one part of that was assault-”
“She says, as I wipe up blood from bites I gave her.”
“Yeah, with the mouth that's covered in my cum.”
He opens his mouth to retort, but he can't find anything to say. His cheeks redden.
She sighs again. They're going in circles and she wants to put an end to it all- she's tired. Filthy. Possibly concussed. Which she uses to excuse what she does next.
“Can I try something?” she asks. Fuck it.
“Try what?"
Without another word, she steps closer, her eyes searching for any sign of protest. When she finds none, she leans in and kisses him, her lips soft and warm against his, holding none of the desperation or haze of their previous encounter, completely free from the influence of any perverted pill or potion.
What's she got to lose?
Sam is shocked at first, his body tensing. He instinctively pulls her off, his eyes flitting around her face as his jaw loosens and tightens in search of something to say.
Her heart sinks and she steps back, “Thought so,” she smiles sadly, backing away, knowing it was a mistake to try. "Can we... can we get out of here?"
He should hate himself, right? He's gone against everything he's ever stood for- let every non-committal brick he's built since teenagehood crumble to dust. He's gone soft. Sentimental. By force, to begin with, yet he still hasn't stopped himself. It's… Pleasant. Is this the balance Cassimir fetishised over?
Screw it, he decides, Because if he has to stand by and watch her grow apart from him when she's just shown the same as- if not more vulnerability than him, what use are a few walls?
He pulls her back, his lips finding hers again. This time, it's different- there’s no urgency, no magical compulsion, but rather something deep- genuine. The kiss is tender, filled with all the emotions they’ve been too afraid to voice, and he feels years worth of tension escape him. His sore muscles loosen, hands cupping her face softly, and she melts into him.
When they finally pull apart, their foreheads rest together, and this alone feels infinitely more intimate than anything that had transpired beforehand.
"So... is it safe to assume that we're both on the same page, or...?" She swallows hard, her voice barely above a whisper, but her usual playfulness breaks through, and it makes him smile.
"What, that we're both in dire need of some good laundry detergent and a shower? Or was there somethin' else on your mind?"
She snorts, gently kicking his shin, the enormity of months worth of repressed feelings finally worn on the proverbial sleeve. She takes a deep breath, the worry in her eyes softening as she looks at him.
"We have a lot to figure out."
He chews the inside of his lip contemplatively, still not entirely sure there’s any reason why she’s being so gracious. So calm, despite it all, like he deserves any of it.
There’s a beat.
And then he nods. Because that’s why she makes his entire psyche shift off-kilter- makes him notice his bad habits.
"We'd… uh, better cash those vials in."
She sees a million-and-one thoughts behind his eyes, but he needs to rest. So she waits, head tilted, suspecting he's got something else to add. 
"How else am I supposed to afford a five-star first date?"
The other million thoughts can wait.
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭
I promise to write something short and funny next time x
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juliasturnz · 2 months
Text
“The little things”
Chris x y/n
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🜸 - Sorry for the small amount of posting🥹
★ - summary:
A late night walk with your boyfriend is got to be the best thing right?
༆ - warnings!:
Kissing and pet names (baby, my love (ml) babe, bae) nothing more ☺︎︎
✫彡 - writers note!:
Sorry for not writing I’ve been struggling mentally a lot so I’m trying to keep up, sorry again🩷
★ -
your laying down with Chris in his just perfectly comfy bed, the soft blanket touching your skin, his head and silky soft hair on your shoulder. But your mind has been keeping you up, everything you could think about right now is a late night walk to just clear your head, to feel the cold night air hitting your skin.
You can’t stop thinking about going outside holding hands with Chris and just yap with each other, you feel bad asking to go for a little walk since he’s laying on your shoulder in a (what it seems like) deep sleep.
The urge is getting bigger and bigger and you finally have the courage to shake his shoulder a little bit. ‘Chris baby?’ ‘Hm? whatsup?’ His voice is raspy and his eyes are still shut, not that you can see much but your at least think so. ‘Can we go for a little walk, my mind has been racing.’ ‘Mhm for sure.’ His head isn’t on your shoulder anymore and you flick on a night stand light. His eyebrows furrow and so do yours, even though it a warm color it’s still very bright since you and Chris aren’t used to the brightness. ‘You can put on some of my clothes, pick whatever you’d like.’ You turn around to see him fully sitting up in his bed, with surprisingly his eyes wide open. ‘Thank you baby and I will.’ You give him a smile back and give him a little peck on his cheek. ‘Wait we should pick each other’s outfits.’ His ideas were the best, and also hard to deny. ‘That’s a great idea!’ Your face lights up by the once again creative idea.
When he’s done picking your outfit and you his, you give each other the pieces of clothing and get dressed. You are wearing his blue fresh love hoodie with a pair of way to big black sweatpants, what makes him giggle when you put it on. And he’s wearing also a black pair of sweatpants with a grey zip-up hoodie. (Yes the grey zip-up hoodie🤭) ‘you look adorable.’ Chris is proudly scanning your outfit and so do you ‘you also look very handsome.’ Chris does a little spin what makes you laugh. ‘I love your smile ml,’ he comes up to and give you a little kiss on your lips. ‘I love yours too Chris.’ He’s not far away from you what makes you a bit nervous, ‘come on, you got to do a little spin for me too!’ His face lightens up while he talks, he sticks out his finger and while you hold it you spin around. ‘Yaaay you look gorgeous!’ You giggle at his excitement not only in his voice but also clearly in his face.
‘Ew I need to brush my teeth, my breaths stinks.’ ‘Yeah me too.’ You and Chris walk up to the bathroom and brush your teeth. You guys are trying to talk but talking while brushing your teeth isn’t the best option. You and Chris keep laughing at each other trying to say words or sentences while brushing your teeth.
When you and Chris finally reach the point where you are on your way to outside, he opens his hands to give you a sign that he wants to hold hands. You lock your hand into his while he gives you a warm smile, you both reach the front door and Chris opens it and the perfectly cold midnight breeze hit your body.
You and Chris walk into the darkness of this beautiful night. ‘I love this so much.’ ‘I’m so glad you woke me up, I didn’t knew I needed this.’ Chris looks around into the darkness from the streets around him. It’s quiet, but a peaceful quiet. You and Chris could just hold hands walk around and say nothing, you were made for each other.
★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
hey gorgeous, you wouldn’t mind liking this post would youuu?? Comment if you wanna be tagged, or js lmk what you think about this.🩷
again I’m sorry for this lack of posting been struggling a lot lately and still wanted to post a bit☻︎, so there it is a short story I’d love to experience 😔😔
Tags:
@042502 @chrisslut333 @chrissslut @chris-slut @chrissv4mp @chrisshotdog @pepsiboyy @pepsiluvr0209 @hollandsangel @hoeformatt @hoesformatt-deactivated20240729 @hopefuljellyfishcollection @mattsfavbitchhh @mattstattos @mattslittleprincess @mattsturnswife @mattsgf @sturnzsblog @sturnzsun @sturnzwrld @sturnzyolo @sturnzluv @sturnslesbo @sturnslcver @sturnsdoll @sturnsbaby @sturnsblunt @sturnioloshacker @sturniolonmc @sturniololoverr @monroesturnns
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sensitive-g · 14 days
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AH. SINKING INTO WATER. WE MEET AGAIN.
IT WAS THIS MF'S BIRTHDAY ON SEPTEMBER 4TH (HAPPY BIRTHDAYYYY). I've been meaning to do a redraw of my tumblr banner for a while bc GODDDD it's old (It's from August 2019 apparently so five years old...) and this gave me an excuse to actually do that. I'm changing it after I post but I'll put the old banner under the cut for comparison if you're curious about it (I LOVE improving my skills over time I LOVE. IMPROVEMENT)
I still love my guy so much HFJKDSHL he means EVERYTHING Actually!! LORE DUMP RQ?? FOR THE HOMIES?? I got an inquiry in a tag about what exactly the REDA in REDAfterale stood for, and I'm not sure where to answer it so I guess I'll leave it under the cut too and hope the person sees it? Sorry to call attention to you in this way LOL
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THE OLD. GAGS. GOD. WHO LET ME POST THIS. This wasn't even meant to be the banner, I just put it there while I was working on an actual banner that I just.... never finished??? I don't even remember actually but there was one that was definitely meant to exist ANYWAY LORE. To the question: yeah REDAftertale is the official title! It's a combination of the word REDACT and Aftertale, named that way after a gimmick that occurs through shenanigans this dumbass gets into. SUUUUPER tldr but it's basically an edit that occurs in the world during a reset, and the edit is relative to wherever this Geno is at the time. His DT is kinda at a similar level to the Frisk's DT in the timeline he ends up in, so when Frisk resets, his DT is kinda fighting for the control and it leads to Frisk.... not being able to reset EVERYTHING back to square one. And while its fighting, Geno's DT just straight up interferes with the world itself and causes wacky zany things to happen. So for example, a reset occurs while he's in Sans and Papyrus's house in this second timeline, and on the other side of it now there's a broom closet between the two rooms where there wasn't one before. Among other plot things!
ANYWAY YEAH SORRY FOR YAPPING AGHAHGAHGHGH
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next-autopsy · 10 months
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A/N: Well, hi there! Don't hate me for this chapter, I was going to have the girls enjoy a nice night out and then I started writing and this came out so....... sorry x
Based on the actors portrayal/hbo show and written with no disrespect to the real life veterans. Also all images found on Pinterest.
TW: some swearing, drinking, very very brief mention of blood/death (nothing major), lieb is a dick for no reason … thats all i think?
Tags: @malarkgirlypop, @panzershrike-pretz
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Made of Glass
Chapter eighteen: A Night to Remember
Choosing Johnny as her sparring partner had been a blessing and a curse. 
On one hand, he was helping her learn properly. Birdie was finally able to defend and attack against someone who was fully willing to brawl her correctly. 
On the other hand, he wasn’t holding back. At all. And, by God, he had a strong swing. 
Bernadette had asked for this and she knew it would be beneficial in the long run, but each hit Johnny landed maybe her regret pushing for extra lessons. 
The instructor had given them small breaks for water during their hour-long lesson and when it was over, demanded they all stretch so their muscles wouldn’t ache too badly the next day. The seven women chatted while doing so, and the topic of weekend passes came up. 
The entire group had not yet been out drinking together, two or three maybe but not all seven, so when they figured out this weekend would be the first they all held a pass, excitement spread. 
Johnny shook his head playfully at the women as they yapped about which bar to visit on the rare occasion. He smiled hearing Bernadette mention introducing her friends, she was enlivened by the thought of the women she had come to call sisters meeting the men she thought of as brothers. The grin on her face was unlike any other and Johnny’s heart warmed thinking of the young lady who had wiggled her way into the center of Easy company and cemented bonds with a large portion of the guys. 
She was Easy’s little sister. 
The image of her splashed with scarlet red blood and lifeless eyes flashed into his mind and Martin involuntarily shivered. It was like the first time he even thought of the southern girl's death, like it wasn’t a possibility before now. If anything happened to her, Easy might just fall apart. Johnny began praying for her every night after that vision of her demise. 
—-----------------------------------------------
“I’m not going.” 
“What? You gotta! It won’t be the same without you.” Blythe begged, quite literally on her knees. Francesca was attempting to weasel her way out of the joyfully dubbed ‘girl’s night’ as they were getting ready. Charlotte passed the red lipstick along to the next girl waiting for the prized makeup, while Birdie sat on the floor in front of her cot and held still as Connie styled her hair, she had convinced Birdie to let her curl it down and leave it flowy. 
“Tell her, Birdie!” Blythe whined to the Corporal, Lucy rolled her eyes at the redhead while fixing her tie. The women were in their dress green and most had opted for the skirt and kitten heeled option for the night out. Only Lucy and Francesca wore the trousers and boots. 
“Yeah, she actually listens to you.” Charlotte added, passing Birdie her lit smoke and the southern girl was still unable to move much. Bernadette gave the Italian woman a pleading look, the best puppy dog eyes she could muster, “Please?” And Frankie folded. Rolling her eyes she grabbed her jacket and sighed, “Fine.”
“Yay! This is going to be so fun!” The chatty redhead jumped up and down, excited to have the full team going out. 
After putting on final touches and ensuring all seven were ready and weren’t forgetting anything, the group left their barracks. 
Five out of seven ladies immediately pulled out smokes and lit them up to combat the chill of the evening air. Only sweet young Connie and the brunette Betty, who don’t partake in puffing cigarettes, were left out of exhaling smoke clouds. Instead the duo led the group, followed by Lucy and Blythe, arm in arm then Birdie and Charlotte either side of Francesca, blocking her in so she couldn't sneak off and return to the barracks.
The group of girls had to split up into two cabs, luckily a whole row of drivers were lined up, waiting to make money off of soldiers needing rides to the nearest bar. Toye had told Birdie which bar he and most of Easy company were planning on visiting that night and she had convinced the girls to spend their time there: The Black Rose, it was called. 
Before entering the drinking establishment, they could hear the rowdy men inside who had apparently started off the night with a drinking competition. Birdie suggested a few of them stay sober to look out for the ladies who would be drinking and urged the women to all leave together around midnight. All the girls agreed, Connie opted not to drink as she was still eighteen, by that logic Birdie and Blythe, who were nineteen and twenty respectively, volunteered to stay sober too. 
A smoky haze filled the bar, Birdie couldn’t hear herself think, that's how loud the men were hollering. The group of women took a moment to look around before Lucy took everyone's drink order before linking arms with Blythe and skipping off to the bar. 
Meanwhile, Birdie had spotted Toye and waved over at him. He had secured a table which had a few empty seats, so Bernadette ushered her girls over his way. 
“You look gorgeous, Birdie.” Toye told her, pulling her in for a hug. He noticed the stares her dolled up look was getting and decided he was on guard tonight. 
“Little Bird!” Guarnere slurred, his drunkenness already rearing its head, “You gonna introduce me to these… beautiful ladies?” Bill slung his arm around Bernadette's shoulders, he winked in their general direction, earning scoffs and rolled eyes. Birdie cringed, it was like watching a sibling flirt and embarrass himself, he wasn’t even good at it, but that could be the alcohol.
“Calm down, Syphilis. They ain’t interested.” She twisted his arm off of her and let it drop down.
“Ah, so this is your diseased friend?” Charlotte smirked, turning to Connie who giggled at the Able company woman’s comment. Bill did not look impressed, he glared at Birdie and mouthed a ‘what the fuck?’ her way. She only grinned at the Italian man and began proper introductions. 
The men at this table were some of her closest friends, of course Bill and Toye were the first she announced, followed by the trio who could not be separated; Malarkey, Skip and Alex. Sitting partially behind them was Bull, Johnny and Lipton who gave polite smiles and head nods as Birdie mentioned the men by name. 
Lucy and Blythe joined them with a tray of drinks, the pair handed them to their fellow woman and Birdie briefly repeated the introductions for the two who missed it.
“Aaaand which one has Herpes?” Lucy leered, hoping to pull a reaction from the man in question. It worked, of course, Bill huffed and crossed his arms over his chest.
“Birdie! Stop telling everyone I have diseases!” 
—----------
It truly was a night to remember. 
Even without drinking, Birdie enjoyed having her ladies out and in such a carefree environment. She dragged the women to the dancefloor early on and began teaching them how to line dance, Blythe, Betty and Connie picked it up quickly while Charlotte and Lucy struggled to keep up with the quick steps. Francecsca refused to try and watched from her table, laughing when Charlotte and Lucy returned to her in defeat. Soon the men wanted in on the merriment and took turns begging the women to dance with them and sung their praises afterwards.
Frankie sat in the corner smoking and observing for the majority of the night, Toye had joined her and the two got on surprisingly well, sitting in silence and sharing smokes. That's when George Luz found them and started throwing jokes left and right, trying to impress the moody pair. Rossi saw right through the jokesters mask, she recognised his heart shaped eyes and knew exactly where they were aimed. 
Charlotte drank a surprising amount; Skip, Alex and Don had challenged her to a drinking contest and pretty soon after losing Birdie had to cut off her supply but she had bribed someone to bring her another gin and tonic within seconds of being banned from the bar. The southern woman assigned Betty to watch the highly intoxicated lady until they were prepared to leave.
Lucy and Blythe disappeared to the bathroom together every five minutes, which raised Birdie's eyebrows. How had she missed that? And Connie was being spun around on the dancefloor from partner to partner as she hadn’t the heart to tell the men she’d had enough.
Bernadette looked around at her girls, it was getting late and probably time to saunter home. Charlotte was near passed out and Connie was starting to look tired. She made the executive decision to call it a night, making her way to Frankie to share her revelation. 
Frankie wholeheartedly agreed, feeling like a third wheel as the more Toye had drunk, the more he returned Luz’s looks. It was subtle, not many would notice the shared glances or how each man checked the other out while they thought no one was watching. 
Francesca noticed. The whole night, she saw it all. 
Birdie rounded up the women, bringing them to the table Frankie was stationed at, her job was to keep them there and not let them wander off. 
Lucy and Blythe were in giggle fits about something that probably wasn’t that funny and Betty was trying to keep Charlotte awake but she wasn’t doing great, the Able company woman slumped over on the table top ungracefully. 
Birdie had to physically tear Connie away from the line of men waiting to dance with the blonde, she told the girls she had to run to the bathroom quickly and then they were leaving. No more drinks, no more dancing. Two minutes maximum. And she scurried off to the back of the establishment where a corridor led off to the restrooms. 
—--------
“Just admit you’re interested in her, man.” Tipper shrugged casually at his friend. Joe only scoffed and shook his head, as if the man had suggested something completely absurd. 
“I mean, it’s kinda obvious…” Ed trailed off, he was winding his buddy up and he knew it. The pair had stepped aside from the noise of the crowds in attempts for a reprieve, but the second Edward had brought up the girl from Mississippi, Liebgott stiffened. 
“I think you should tell her-”
“I‘m not interested in her.” Joe cut off Tip’s words, his hands were curled up into fists even though he would never dream of hitting his friend, it was more like a stress relief. 
Joe’s back was to a corridor, while Tipper half faced it as he stood beside his friend. Out of the corner of his eye, Ed saw the shadows in the semi lit corridor move. Joe began speaking again at the same time Ed recognised the shady figure but by then it was too late to tell him to shut his mouth. 
“Bernadette Coldwell is a stuck up princess. My type ain’t arrogant, conceited bitches who don’t know when to shut up.” Liebgott’s voice was venomous, he glared at Ed for a moment before noticing his stance. Tip was uncomfortable, his face was scrunched up as he half cringed, half winced and that’s when Joe noticed his eyes flick to something behind him. Lieb’s face dropped, he didn't want to turn around, somehow he knew what he would see if he looked behind him and it gave him swirls in his chest. 
Not even two seconds later and Joe felt the unmistakable shove of his shoulder, then he was watching Bernadette stomp past him, her tawny brown hair bouncing with every step. He only saw her face for a split second but the look she carried gave him instant regret, the miserable feeling pooled in his stomach and ached in his chest. He hadn’t meant those harsh words, he didn’t actually think she was conceited or arrogant but he said them and she had heard them. 
Joe stepped out after her, following her through the crowd. He called out her name once, then twice but she kept trudging away from him. 
Birdie was relieved when she found familiar faces. She just wanted to leave, she didn’t know how long Liebgott was standing there talking shit about her but the part she had heard was enough to cut the southern girl deep. She was holding it together for now, but she knew the second someone tried to comfort her, the emotional wall would break and she might cry, hence the desperate need to depart. 
“Y’all ready to go?” Birdie plastered a smile onto her face, hoping the girls wouldn’t notice or maybe they would and help her get out of the bar, pronto. Betty and Connie positioned themselves either side of Charlotte and hoisted her up while Lucy and Blythe linked arms, preparing to leave. 
“What happened?” Frankie walked over to Bernadette, catching sight of the dejected look on her friend's face. The Italian jumped into protection mode, no one gets to give Birdie trouble and get away with it, not while she was around. 
“Nothing. Let's go.” She was obviously hiding something and Francesca wouldn’t let it go that easy. If she didn’t tell her now they would talk about it when they got back to their barracks.
“Someone upset you? Tell me the truth, I can tell when you lie.” 
“I’m fine, can we just go, please?” Bernadette’s shoulders sagged, all she needed in this moment was to get out of the suffocating crowd and envelope herself in peace and quiet so she could sulk at whim. 
“Birdie!” Liebgott caught up with her, pushing his way through the throng of people. Francesca noted the way Birdie’s face changed, eyebrows furrowing and lips turning down. The overprotective Italian looked at the man making his way toward them, she recognised him as the guy who dropped Birdie off late one night and made their entire interaction uncomfortable. Frankie had thought maybe the two were friends, but now she knew they weren’t.
“He upset you?” Rossi whispered to the forlorn woman, “You want me to stab him?” From anyone else that comment could be considered a joke, but Frankie was serious. She subtly brought out her hidden weapon, a blade she always kept on her person, she meant business and wanted Birdie to know the lengths she would go for their friendship.
“No, it’s- uh Rossi…?” Bernadette's gaze switched from her friend's face, to her now occupied hand, “What is that?”
“Knife.” Simple. 
“Wha- Why do you have a knife?” She was beginning to panic, was she going to have to break up a fight in a moment? Birdie was not in the mood for this.
“Bar fights.” She offered little explanation other than that. 
“What the- Put it away.” The southerner pleaded, earning a stern look from Rossi. But she listened and returned the knife to its original hiding spot. 
“Birdie, just let me explain-” Joe had gotten close enough to the girl that he could reach out and touch her. His hand held onto her forearm and tugged her ever so slightly closer to him, so they were now face to face, staring at each other. 
“Don’t you think you’ve said enough?” She didn’t want his explanation, not now while her emotions were running high. Bernadette looked into Joe’s eyes and she could feel tears filling her own. She tried her hardest to hold it back, put on a straight face but her bottom lip wobbled and her brows scrunched up. 
Joe watched the emotions run across her features, he couldn’t pull his focus from her eyes. They glistened with watery tears, round and wide, making him forget where they were, surrounded by people. He wanted to comfort her, wipe those tears away, kiss her and make it all better. 
Then he remembered why she was about to cry in the first place, he had done that. He had hurt her with his horrid words so much that she was boarderline sobbing. Now all he could do was leave her to retreat and lick her wound in private. His hand dropped from where he gripped onto her. 
“...yeah…” He had said enough.
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A/N: Ahhh! The angst! Joe why would you say that?!
~ next-autopsy ~
Chapter nineteen
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spilledmilkfkdies · 3 months
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Dunno if anybody asked you this before but
opinion on different ships involving wotbc? (that you know of)
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ALL of them?? Deranged ask, muting you on the server for a thousand years, no trial. Jk of course but :O!! I have gotten asks about ships before, plus I did a silly lil ship bingo that I may have to bring back- But just for YOU, joyous one, I will simply summarise and link things! Put it all together!
Starting within the Black Circle itself:
There is no ship combination between them I'm inherently against, I say boldly and bravely. Could probably write for most of them too, even if they're not my absolute favourite, because again, I don't straight up dislike any of them.
Of course I do have my personal top dogs cough cough cough- Like at this point it's no secret I'm a very normal and casual enjoyer of Ogron x Gantlos (gantlogron? ograntlos?? I like gantlogron better ngl). Maybe it's the way I personally enjoy writing Gantlos, but it's just so easy? To make them work?? And if you're not a fan of easy, you can always take the more angsty route and make them. Slightly less equal. They come in multiple flavours!! I think this might be my favourite ship for both of them currently, but I'll elaborate on that in a sec.
Next is my other top dog, Duman x Anagan (DUMANAGAN 🦅🦅). I feel like I've talked about them way more than I actually have?? Maybe it's hidden in reblogs and tags but dang sjsksk, either I should tag better or yap about them more. It's probably gonna be the latter. There's just something about their 'decently normal guy x the HORRORS he keeps inviting everywhere' that does something for me idk, in a platonic way as well. I just really appreciate them as a duo, in whatever dysfunctional form their relationship comes in. Frequently bought together ass couple smh.
About both Gantlos x Anagan (anagantlos? GANAGAN!!!) and Ogron x Anagan (????anagron?) I can be kiiinda brief. Haven't seen a lot of Gantlos x Anagan, but it's fine, why not. Ogron x Anagan is slightly more interesting to me, but maybe that's because I personally enjoy making them clash a bit. Probably still doable though.
Now- Not to slut shame Duman, definitely not during pride month, but this man gets around in a way the others don't and it must be said. Maybe it's his adaptability but DAMN. Ig that's kinda the point of him though. To me. Just the age old question.. Duman is every wizard's favourite, but who's his favourite? Nobody knows. If it's between Ogron x Duman (..dugron?) and Gantlos x Duman (dumantlos) I probably like Ogron x Duman slightly more? They both have angst potential though. Is something I've noticed. Duman gets around but at what cost? Maybe I should just read happier fics.
Actually NO it's Duman's fault there's so much angst around him, that's what he gets for canonically dying and having ties to envy. Dumed Doomed from the start fr.
Moving on to?? There being ships with three of them?? Which is extremely funny to me. Exclusion. Some of these I've only heard about, some I've seen actual content for- Ogron x Anagan x Duman, brought up by someone in the server unironically, Gantlos was NOT invited. Ogron x Gantlos x Anagan, ah yes, sometimes a family is three husbands and the weird pet they found that's their son now. Ogron x Gantlos x Duman was just angst, and Gantlos x Anagan x Duman gives me dumanagan convincing Gantlos to mess around with them vibes I'M SORRY. This is really taking me places.
Y'know you could always just have them all date each other at that point. Affectionately nicknamed 'dumanagantlogron' right here right now. Don't see it a whole lot, but that's probably because it gives you less group dynamic wiggle room. Understandably not for everyone because of that, but there's nothing inherently wrong with it. Me personally, I could be convinced. Be wild be free. Also imagine being at a bar or whatever, one of them comes up to you and goes "Hey, me and my three boyfriends just love your vibe" what do you do where do you go from there bye
This is gonna be a BIG one bro, I might have to cut it here for now and make a second part just so it doesn't become scroll hell- I'm only now "done" yapping about ships INSIDE the Circle. I still have so much to say, I know too many ships. Yeah I'm really cutting it here sjsks
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purpurussy · 1 month
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Saw you asking about ywgttn - it's probably above your pay grade yeah I thought it was a bit MH 101, it's probably helpful for someone who deals with anxiety or depression but not anything else. But I do think the tone of it is pretty good, personally I cannot fucking stand those trite saccharine "you deserve to be gentle with yourself!" type books, and ywgttn is very much in dans usual voice. like typical Dan "turns out making a joke out of your poor mental health is actually a terrible coping mechanism, don't do what I did!" Sort of voice. I do actually think he did a pretty good job with the tone, not making it too heavy or deep while also taking everything seriously. But yeah if you're experienced in dealing with poor mental health it's probably not something you'd find useful.
Because it's so clearly his voice I do remember thinking I wanted more of his personal anecdotes from it, but it makes more sense that it's not about him, tbh. Plus that would be quite personal. Theres some stuff about his life in there but not much that we as fans of his YouTube channel wouldn't have already learned.
I'm really glad people are sharing their thoughts on ywgttn! I was looking up reviews a while ago when I was trying to decide whether to buy the new paperback version, and I found a reddit thread where people had a very different opinion which put me off a bit, but it also seems from what I can tell that dnp reddit became a bit toxic a couple of years ago (someone in the comments on the post I found said that it had become a "dan hating zone" during the hiatus), so I think that might be why.
The reddit phannies had a big issue with the tone (calling it "condescending" mainly), and claimed that he was giving dangerous/unhealthy advice, although yeah I think this was due to a specific kind of mysterious brain rot which seemed to take over phan reddit a few years ago. I just found the thread again and someone claimed that he was telling his "13-17-year old audience" (which firstly is like. are the 13 year olds in the room with us now) to rely on sex/masturbation as an unhealthy coping mechanism. But I saw the page about sex/masturbation posted earlier today, and what he said was "doing something relaxing, for example having an orgasm and putting your phone away, can help you sleep better" which is like fair enough, I think a lot of people would agree. But this person seemed to think he said "hey kids, did you know that the ONLY way to achieve good mental health is by JORKIN THAT THANG 24/7" so yeah I decided I'm gonna take the reddit opinions with a big old grain of salt lmfaooo. Your assessment of the tone seems a lot more appealing.
Your last paragraph did get me wondering if there was a bit of a marketing dilemma with ywgttn. I assume they had a market segment in mind of people who are already fans and are familiar with Dan and his humor and vibes, and I wonder if it was tricky to strike a balance between appealing to phannies who want more comedy and juicy personal anecdotes from him, while at the same time also appealing to a wider audience who might not know anything about him (or care about his life/get his comedy like we do) and are genuinely reading it as a self-help book. There's a risk of appealing to nobody if you're trying to make something that appeals to everyone, but it seems like he pulled it off!
Sorry I yapped a bit here lmao. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, I think I'll give it a go based on what you guys have said! (if nothing else I'm curious now, also someone said in the tags earlier today that it helps to parasocially listen to Dan specifically telling you to take care of your mental health, even if you've heard it before, and I think that might be the case for me too dshlsgkhlg)
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b1adie · 4 months
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Hi there Adri, I hope you have a good day!
So I saw that total cutie Blade on tiktok and looked up his lore on Wikipedia but it's completely confusing to me, I know basics of hsr lore like mara or aeons cause my roommate rambles about it 24/7 but I don't play this game yet and roommate doesn't care about Blade so they ignore all his voicelines etc...
Came to tumblr to find out more and I saw your blog in tag + in your faq you stated you don't mind lore questions...
So please ignore it if you don't want to answear but could you explain to me Blade's lore more or less?
I'm so sorry if I came out as pushy, I know it's probably a complicated lore and a lot to write about but even watching cutscenes on yt didn't make anything clearer while I feel like this guy could make me play hsr... Sorry for anon, I'm a bit shy.
no prob, i’ll try and explain his story as simply as possible!! and.. add a tldr cuz i know im gonna yap
im sorry the tldr got long too. here.
TLDR was TL, DR: craftsman/blacksmith human named yingxing that became cursed with immortality while participating in a fucked up resurrection ritual for one of his friends. was killed thousands of times til he became mara struck and forgot his past human life. got picked up by the stellaron hunters cuz their leader apparently knows a way to permanently kill him and he wants to die so bad. he didnt know his name but he has a cool sword so they call him bladie. he’s old and he apparently has a valid drivers license and obeys traffic laws but he cant play video games because he keeps stabbing himself in the hand.
iffff you have any further questions you can ask ^_^
TLDR; he was. regular human who was taken to the xianzhou as a child after abominations of abundance destroyed his home world. he picked the name yingxing there. he grew up to be a master craftsman and was incredibly skilled and confident, even considered arrogant. since he was a short life species on a ship of people who would live like 700 years longer than him on avg, they found him lame and annoying, but he was better than all of them at making shit so they had to give him the title of Furnace Master cuz he won it. then at some point he became a member of the high cloud quintet, made up of him and 4 friends (jing yuan, jingliu, dan heng’s past incarnation dan feng, and a foxian girl named baiheng). they fought abominations together and were considered legendary and told about in stories. but, baiheng was killed in battle, and dan feng wanted to revive her. he asked yingxing to help him. the revival went wrong and turned baiheng’s remains into a fucked up beast and also cursed yingxing with immortality. jingliu had to put the baiheng monster down, but she loved baiheng so much and having to be the one to kill her mutated corpse like this drove her to become mara struck. she killed yingxing with the sword he made for her, and then again, and again, killing him thousands of times, until he too became mara struck and forgot his life as yingxing entirely. then the stellaron hunters found his miserable ass in the woods somewhwre and said hey grandpa come with us and we’ll kill you for good. and he was like damn okay if you promise. he didnt know his own name and said he would be more use to them as a weapon than a Person, so kafka started calling him bladie and he didnt object so now he’s called blade. he doesn’t think of that as his name though, he still refers to himself as “the unnamed.” but like, he’ll answer to it out of convenience i guess.
OKAY NOT SHORTENED VERSON.
he was born a regular human on a planet that was soon taken over by the borisin (basically immortal space wolves that brutally kill humans). he was the only survivor of his family and sitll a child. he was taken to the xianzhou zhuming and taken under the wing of their arbiter general, huaiyan. (so like, basically the jing yuan of that ship). he took on the name Yingxing there. he became an apprentice craftsman because the xianzhou is very well known for its forging and craftsmanship. he was always generally overlooked or sneered at due to being a short-life species, which of course meant he could never accomplish as much as any of the long-lived xianzhou people. he was wildly ambitious, though, often described as proud and arrogant, mentioned to have stayed awake for days at a time engrossed in his work. xianzhou natives attempted to sabotage his work by deliberately giving him defective or poor-quality material, but it never held him back. despite all the adversity, he became the Furnace Master, the highest title a craftsman can hold on a xianzhou ship.
when he was still a young kid, he’d met a foxian girl named baiheng. they met again some years later, along with jingliu, the champion swordmaster on the luofu, jing yuan, a young cloud knight and her apprentice, and dan feng, the high elder of the luofu vidyadhada. they all hit it off and became very close friends. yingxing forged special weapons for each of them, and the five fought against the abominations of abundance. they became known as the high cloud quintet.
they had a great time for many years, but the rest of them were all going to outlive him by centuries. they Should have, at least. baiheng was killed in battle, having done so protecting them in some way (distracting the enemy or interrupting them i believe?). dan feng decided they should take her remains along with some cursed abundance flesh and try to resurrect her. he convinced yingxing to join him in his wacky little plan. yingxing was like 70 by then hauling his old ass to go do some scary ritual.
they tried to resurrect her and did bad. instead of baiheng, they created a cursed dragon beast that started wreaking havoc and killing people. jingliu arrived in time to put the beast down. but. she was very, very close with baiheng. like obviously its not outright spoken canon, but they were basically married. so killing the mutated beast made from her wife’s corpse caused her to become mara struck. she killed yingxing as he stood in front of dan feng.
but! due to him fucking with that cursed abundance flesh during the resurrection, he came back to life. (and also got like 40 years younger apparently). jingliu took him with her somewhere and used the sword he made for her to kill him thousands of times, until he too became mara struck and forgot all memories of his life as yingxing.
then she kind of just dumped him in the wilderness somewhere or he escaped and went to the wilderness somewhere. he didnt know his name or anything, just that every part of him was constantly in agonizing pain and he could not die, despite badly wanting to die so the pain would end.
one day while he was out there, kafka and samfly showed up and tried to get him to join the stellaron hunters. he was mara stricken and batshit crazy thought so kafka had to shoot him to death and have samfly hold him down while she used her ability to calm his mara. she told him their leader knew a way to kill him permanently, and would help him reach this goal if he joined them. and he was like oh well in that case sure. she asked him his name, and he said he didn’t have one. (even in his internal monologue, he only ever refers to himself as ‘the unnamed.’) he told her he was more of a weapon than a person, so she was like. ummm.. okay. i’m calling you bladie. and he just let her do that and now everyone calls him blade
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wheeler-fan · 3 months
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Hiii! Sorry if I sound weird or disrespectful in some way, I was curious if it’s a common experience for you as a mileven shipper to go on byler tag just to try to understand their point of view. Like you go “ahh byler shippers make no sense, I wonder what are their thoughts on that scene/dialogue/etc” and then read some theories to understand them better. For example I am a byler and anti-mileven which means I completely don’t get this ship so I sometimes scroll through mileven tag or blogs to see “what are you guys on” (w/o negative tone)😭basically learning more abt mileven. Cause sometimes I see anti-byler posts where author obvi doesn’t even know what there’re talking abt and same thing with some anti-mileven ones. In my country there’s a popular phrase “know your enemy in the face”, it basically means you can’t hate anything not knowing what it is and I actually think that’s really important, some ppl should take notes lol, sorry for yapping. I’m not texting you specifically bc I have a beef with you or anything, I actually love your blog cause your posts (even tho I disagree ofc) are valid. I’m sure you cook such wonderful meals for your community and honestly? Keep going!! (I’ll read your stuff too 😼)I tried to make this ask anonymous but can’t find the button on the tablet so you can come at me if you need😭
heyyy, good question but it depends
usually i just text random byler shippers (or friends that ship byler but I don't have much of them so if you're a byler shipper and we're moots it actually means that you're super cool 😭😭😭) and ask them about their point of view
tbh i don't spend much time on tumblr bc i hate to see what people are doing to my fav character here (mike) and also i kinda feel like byler on tumblr is like a new reddie fanfic version 💀 emo boy and a sensitive little baby🥰🥰 I'm sorry 😭
I read a lot of byler theories mainly because of Mike, and usually they don't make sense to me, but honestly I found theories that were really good even though I ship Mileven
tbh for me byler would make way more sense if not the fact that there's only one season left and mike doesn't even know that will isn't straight - actually will haven't done a coming out even to his mom yet😭😭 i just feel like there's not enough time for all of this sorry guys
but i get why people ship it and even if that doesn't make much sense to me- if u want to ship them u can like it's not that deep it's just a fictional ship, the only thing i ask for- don't talk shit about my ship to make yours more valid please
also, even if I'm reading byler theories for fun to talk about them later with my mileven moots I'm trying to keep it for myself, i don't want to talk shit about byler cuz i don't want people to do the same to my ship. Like i get that we share a character but we don't have to kill ourselves 😭 just focus on your own ship..
answering ur question: I'm not searching for an explanation on tumblr or sth bc the explanation will be like : mike and will wear green so byler endgame 😝
i just ask an actual byler on pv so i can understand something better which is actually funny cuz i can randomly text someone and be like: hey I'm a mileven shipper but i wanted to ask, can u explain the birthdaygate to me? and i will get a whole paragraph about it😭 (btw thanks to the random byler that explained it to me before ross posted will byers on ig)
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