#I wish I could show it to everyone tho
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I got a glow in the dark blanket and got so excited about it and wanted to show everyone how beautiful the little stars were when you turn off the light. Sadly I discovered that there’s pretty much no way of photographing it or recording it in any way and, as upset as I was about it, it ended up becoming a 40 minute talk about “unrecordable beauties” and how many of those we experience daily.
To think about how much beauty we get to see but cannot show other people that are not there, that some things you just have to experience to know how wonderful they are and how much unbridled joy they can give is kind of insane, isn’t it?
#ALL OF THIS FROM A FUCKING BLANKET#ABSOLUTELY MAD#AND WONDERFUL#I wish I could show it to everyone tho#It’s beautiful and magical and PHILOSOPHICAL APPARENTLY#Bless you blanket ❤️#🌟#‘Unrecordable beauties’ are gonna be a new favorite topic of conversation for me from now on
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Hi there! I had a thought come to mind and of course it’s mashle and especially about my favorite pair of brothers, wirth and orter. Like say orter is on a mission or whatever and he gets hit with like a reverse age spell or something and he gets turned into a little kid again and everyone is trying to get to come out of hiding and they need wirth to come get him. I kind of seem him kind of as a shy or quiet kid and is kind of stranger danger, but what do you think? It can even be vice versa and wirth becomes little wirth again. I dunno it’s something floating around my head and I need a fellow mutual. (Sorry if it’s so long)
Its okay !! I love long asks just go wild with it honestly (lots of text tho so I'm making my reply small font <3)
BUT YES!! Ive been thinking abt this for a while too, I also think orter would be a pretty quiet and cautious kid !! he is smart✨ I also think that he'd be shy and sweet around ppl he's unfamiliar w (if theyre not a threat to him), but with people hes closer to he might be a bit more snarky lol
Also i imagine that wirth is actually unfamiliar with this side of him because orter wasnt rly close to him growing up, and in his teenage-adult yrs hes never been on the other side of his brother's genuine wrath so (orter's sarcasm is reserved for his best friends and enemies)💀 he interacts with baby orter and hes like what the fuck who is this (<guy who has never been sassed by his older brother once)
Also I read this ask and desperately needed to draw it so take this too (ft. kaldo)
#something i think abt a lot tho is that while wirth believes his brother doesnt understand him the reverse can also be said...#wirth doesnt know his brother well beyond what his brother shows him and his rep as a divine visionary like does he even know abt alex??#anyways what im getting at is that orter also has sides of him that he only shows his friends too and wirth has never seen it#so when he becomes a kid and shows more of his personality besides that stickler by the book and awkward side of him to wirth it shocks him#sorry for rambling i have a lot of thoughts i wish i could draw more but alas !!!#ill tag this so everyone is forced to see it#mashle#mashle magic and muscles#wirth madl#wirth mádl#orter madl#orter mádl#kaldo gehenna
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while i totally believe cannibalism in nbc hannibal is a metaphor for love i also believe it's a metaphor for transition (not intentionally written that way but it just happens--it could also be a metaphor for coming out as gay)
bc think about it
will has this side to him he has to suppress
he then goes through stages of exploration, self-acceptance, and embracing who he is
this involves killing as an act of transition towards his true self (similar to how we have "deadnames", some people may even view transition as a sort of "killing" their pre-transition self so their true gender self can be born)
he is literally scared of how good it feels, which is very trans--being terrified of what it means to let that shell crack, fearing you are a monster for enjoying these things (which, the "monster as metaphor for queerness and social outcastedness" is a classic horror trope)
not to mention rituals, consuming/growing/literally having new substances inside the body that you did not experience before (human flesh as hrt), and engaging in acts that the world finds heinous but nourishes the body
his cannibalism is him becoming god-like ("Killing must feel good to God, too. He does it all the time") and we all know trans ppl are gods and goddesses and godexxes of the mortal realm
rly the list goes on
but basically season 1 will graham is eggy as fuck and season 3 is him finally becoming his full self and accepting love for who he is and thats so sexy and cool and transgender of him
#hannibal#this is at least partly a shitpost and i dont believe all the things im saying and u shouldnt either#i do believe the fundamental point tho that will's arc is a transition arc#and i dont think it should be limited to just gender transition as there are many transitions in life but it applies well to gender#esp considering the overall queerness of the show#hannibal is the gay daddy we all wished we had guiding us through the transition process#or maybe thats just me lmfao#anyway#hannibal nbc#nbc hannibal#hannigram#gay cannibals#queer#gay#i think it could also easily be a metaphor for autistic unmasking#or rly again any kind of transition and i think thats why the show appeals to so many#bc everyone can relate to the joy of seeing someone transform#into a more authentic self#uhhh#yeah ✌️#this is all strictly relating to fiction btw obligatory “killing is bad folks”#shouldnt have to say that but this is tumblr#honestly im just giggling to myself about human flesh as hrt#im just going through some gender shit rn and hannibal is helping me through
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be careful while mining... you might just find an evil underground throne
#not really an evil lair but it went like this so... i did a bit of cave too :D didn't work on it much tho..#wish i could take screenshots in higher resolutions this sucks so bad lol#used shaders bc the light from above looks cool. good contrast with the warm light inside#kind of proud of how it turned out. the shots too#don't really like the lanterns. too bright. wish we had lanterns that could turn off to use as decorations :/#minec#pisco art#should i show this to everyone? it's nice but is it worth showing?#oh well whatever#mineblr#minecraft
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big al is literally that “i’m a bad bitch you can’t kill me” meme and i think that’s what every geriatric mercenary needs to aspire to
#oc txt.#c: alberta#i mean SHE IS A BAD BITCH#88 in show timeline and she’s still out here like i wish i bitch would 🤨#doesn’t give a damn!#her only weakness is her granddaughter 🥰 bc she loves her more than she’s loved anything or anyone#homegirl has been killing for caps since she was 25 and showed no signs of stopping until bethany got stuck in the middle#of some retaliation against her when she was 15#after that she was like I GUESS it’s time to hang it all up 😔✌️ … lol kidding 😝 i’ll break your legs#she doesn’t trust a single mf but they’ve done well in gecko springs and live just on the outskirts#run a little gecko farm#for the last fifteen or so years#she sits on the porch with er rifle all day and listens to her wind chimes while threatening to snipe jonas from ALL THE WAY back there#and she probably could tbh!#bethany is still like traumatized tho so she keeps to herself and tends to her geckos#keeps trying to domesticate them but it’s only worked once 💀#named him sugar bomb and he’s her best friend 💕🦎#big al forces het to go be an adult in town tho#get outta the house and live bith#not everyone has 400 lives like that old hag
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nothing I write could truly capture the way I feel, having finished corydalis' campaign. god. what a game. what an adventure!
#bg3#bg3 spoilers#thoughts about media#maaaan when everyone showed up for the final battle? tears man. tears.#I'm so glad I've finally gone start to finish with a campaign. that was an incredible experience.#AND I SAVED THEM ALL!! I was worried karlach would die! since corydalis is with astarion & wyll broke his pact.#nope! so long as wyll is the blade of avernus- it seems he will offer to join karlach!#I was even given the option for corydalis to go with them- even tho he's not in a relationship with either of them.#not sure if that's a bug or a feature though.#wish you could give everyone hugs :( I've seen people say you can hug wyll but I couldn't get it to happen.#it was SO nice seeing all of them SO happy though.#I don't ever really feel happy at all anymore. but to see them healing & finding purpose in life again?#well it brought a genuine smile to my face.#they're all such wonderful characters. I really do love them all so dearly.#thank you larian for a game that was truly deserving of every dollar I spent on it.
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#man i have GOT to get off of instagram#i open the app and see a post about animal abuse that has me in tears straight off the bat#then when i manage to shake that off i open the comments on a cute post about a kids tv show and am greeted with violent transphobia#i dont use twitter anymore bc i couldnt open the damn app without seeing brand new types of transphobia and instagram is getting worse#tumblr has it too but i can avoid it here. otherwise i think i would have a nokia brick at this point#im on instagram to keep up w my irl friends i think at this point i need to unfollow like everyone i dont know irl#and then stop opening the explore tab#its a little sad tho bc i like sending my brother funny reels like i know thats not important but :(#i wish i could open an app without taking psychic damage tho#i need a better way to get news tho like getting my news from tumblr and subreddits cannot be good#dogbunni diary log
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meowdy... <3
#i'm so close to caught up on everyone's lovely art and fics ;_; hghghgh and if you've sent an ask i'll answer it soon!!#[to the one person who knows who she is: KJSNKJN. KJSNDKJNDKJ. AAAAAA???? (positive)]#i've been very avoidant lately of online spaces ;; pt has been hard on my wrists so i haven't been able to work much on my plushie#and typing has been just as hard -- if it isn't the pain it's the inflamed nerves wrecking my hand-eye coordination#so i think i'm pressing keys when i'm not or i'm pressing all of the wrong keys. so it takes me twice as long to type anything ;;#i'm hoping we're building a good rapport tho and finding an equilibrium between Not Pushing Enough#and TOO MUCH TOO MUCH OW OW OW (week-long whole-arm nerve pain) kjsnfkjn so. i hope that means i'll be able to type regularly again soon!!!#we're just in the learning phase of both of us figuring out what my nerves can handle without exploding lmao. turns out: not much!!#i really want to talk to people again rghhhh i miss everyone sm!!! i keep being like 'wow i'm so lonely i wonder why that is'#<- has been disconnected from friends for many weeks#i WAS finally able to finish ren's face tho! very slowly! and i'm close to done w the body embroidery!!!#excited to have that done. not excited to start hand sewing. wish i had a working sewing machine even if i could only sit at it#for a few minutes at a time sjdfnskjn life could be a dream...#HENNYWAISE. hopefully i will soon have my carpal tunnel and pinched nerves reined in. my mars anniv is tomorrow#and i don't have anything to show for it bc of my wrists so. blows a kiss into the sky for her <3 my beloved oc-ified oushirou KJNSDKJN#i'm rambling and dont want to edit things bc pain from today's appointment ok i love u byebye 👋🏻👋🏻👋🏻👋🏻👋🏻#📌 [ my posts. ]#💭 [ my thoughts. ]#vent -#<- just in case
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YA GIRL MANAGED TO SURVIVE THIS HELLISH DAY AND IS GONNA BE HOME TOMORROW TO WATCH LAST TWILIGHT LIVE
#god knows i wish i had a whole month off and not just a day tho#i feel so bad about not being able to answer everyone's messages and i just wish i had the time to do that#i do hope you guys know that i deeply appreciate every single one of them#but i desperately wish i could actually SHOW you that appreciation#i also want to write so much stuff about last twilight and vice versa#but most of the time im so tired i really can't put a single coherent thought together#anyway. i need sleep so badly#to delete
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here's my hot take
#your boyfriend game#i forgot who the other characters are but heres little miss cockblocker and my beloved TK 💚✨💕💖🫀💔#i call him that becuase he keeps COCKBLOCKING me by committing murder and thats crine.#cringe#i like thinking about the high school au because i have confidence that if he went to school with me i could drive him to suicide.#i have the opposite of rizz. like instead of making people want me i make them hate themselves. only when i want to tho#and it's not like i have anything against bald people or violent criminals. the warden from human centipede 3 is both of those and i want#him so fucking badly. all day all night no lube no protection god is dead and we have killed him knock me out and attach me to the prison c#ntipede.#anyway i tried to play this game because he reminded me of said warden. but i got kind of attached to the landlord character#and when i found out theres no way to have sex with him i got so mad i threw up & punched a wall & now my real landlord is mad at me for p#unching a wall.#god's whims are cruel and i am a plaything of life😃#and its all this eggcel (pre-trans femcel) (my headcanon) 's fault i hope everyone die slowly and painfully#except TK i want them to live. they deserve to be happy 💖#anyway i wish p*t*r was real so i could send him this image. i think he would kill himself if he saw this. i would if i was him#i would also kill myself as soon as i found out i was named after a f*mily g*y character tho. so obviously he's not very similar to me.#hate. let me tell you how much ive come to hate you since i began to live. tehre are 387.44 mi9llion miles of#hey if you censor f*m*ly g*y like f***** g*y people will think you're just being homophobic instead of a show hater#gonna start censoring it ike that. teehee#anywway#miku binder the joker and vivziepop heffley. fight#my posts
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Okay the fnaf movie was pretty banging
#fnaf#fnaf movie#i loved the animatronics#they had great sound design and the little movements like the eyelids or bonnie’s ears were so good#they were also incredibly unsettling that first time mike peeked behind the curtain and shone the light at them#but they were adorable too esp when playing with abby#like they’re just kids man#the cupcake was fucking mental#it was making shredded cheese out of everyone lmao#another thing that made me laugh out loud was afton showing up#like yeah he’s the evil child murderer but just him popping behind a corner in a big soft bunny suit just-#and when he started talking-#it was a serious situation but all i could see was a dude in a furry suit#and that whole boss fight atmosphere#yeah it was funny to me#i didn’t like the whole vanessa thing tho#of course the lore isn’t gonna match 100% and i didn’t expect it to but vanessa just felt a bit forced to me#i did like how she was aware of it all tho#and golden freddy was also a bit ehhh#wish they would’ve shown more of him#like he spoke a few times in the dreams and showed up to get abby and then disappeared again#but i guess that’s what he does even in the games#I’d say 4/5 over all#I’ve been watching the gameplays and theories since 2014 so it was nice to have a fresh look at the whole thing#now I’m off to watch matpat’s newest fnaf theory video tho
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can't believe one of the most iconic pieces of media in my country is a(n occasionally musical) sitcom meant for kids, about a failing band living above a failing hamburger shop, with. so much discussion about adult issues (at least in the first few seasons) it's actually kind of funny that the kids channel is the one hosting it. and so many iconic quotes or memes we have came from this show. put hapijamot on netflix please more people deserve to experience it
#i will say tho! iirc the 4th season was meant for adults. which makes this even more bizarre#esp bc it is often lumped in with the other season in like vod libraries and such 😭 and its reruns go on the kids channel too#in the end of season 4 they all fucking die. they're ghosts#they start this season by getting sued iirc?????#they start season 5 by bringing everyone back from heaven btw. one of the guys became god to excuse his absence from this season#so much of this show probably aged badly but so much of it is like simpsons level of prediction. so#i follow a page called hapijamot frames that literally has a quote from this show for everything that happens on the news#LISTEN it is so iconic i wish i could show it to you all
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I wish I could inject pasilyo into my brain so I can have permanent happiness
#There’s this specific part of the song#It srsly alters my brain chemistry#Anyways#i hate tumblr sm#Idk like I Gen hate being on here sm#No matter what account I make no matter if I tell ppl about it whether I don’t tell ppl I just hate this place soooo much#Like if I have a following it sucks because it’s rlly lonely if I don’t it’s still lonely and then if there’s nobody at all it’s lonely#Loneliness is what got me to discord boy so like :D#The fact I am genuinely missing him sm I’m gonna krill myself 😻🙏#Also I think I hate talking to minors cause these kids be letting themselves get groomed all the time I’m so tired of seeing it#The creep in my course is being so weird to Raisa who is a minor … I can’t help but think it’s all my fault … I invited her to the pharm gc#To show her how messy it was ….#I didn’t expect her to follow and accept requests of everyone …#Anyways I just am so annoyed. Like I wish I could have one person just one where I can be confident in being their no.1 but every time I th#Think I’m maybe somewhere high up on someone’s list of important ppl I realise I overestimated my position even tho I’m rlly self conscious#And being myself down over that. Also I still hate Eid. I hate Eid sm. How do ppl genuinely enjoy Eid. Idk if I’ve ever been excited for Ei#It’s like I’m just suddenly getting more sick of ppl by the day. I Gen don’t like talking to ppl at all even tho I used to rely on talking#To others like its sustenance now it’s just such a hassle to me because I’m so sick of being unimportant to literally every single person I#Have ever known. Literally everyone except maybe dahlia idk. the only person who has never gotten mad/snapped at me o is dahlia#And knowing my luck that will soon be taken from me too. Anyways good riddance to tumblr i loathe this site and im sick of the mind games#All the time from just existing on here. Gen makes me feel ill. I’m so sick of that girl I like and sick of everyone. The only time ppl car#Is when I cause a scene. And ykw atp I loathe being showed sympathy and pity for these sorts of posts because it just feels like a big joke#Cause why couldn’t you just care when I was fine. Why do you ONLY care when I’ve had enough of your bad behaviour. How does one make someon#Like me go mad with all these things#Istg if I come back to this dumb site whether to this acc to the tora one or my other account everyone has permission to beat me up.#dora daily#Tldr;I HATE ppl and everyone ever + I’m just sick of pretending like everyone doesn’t suck cause how can ppl be so insufferable intolerable#Insane horrible in every way and ppl like them. How do they live with themselves when they’re this aggravating. Every day I hate ppl more#Because their mannerisms their everything is just so embarrassing.#Essay tags 😻😻😻
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im currently writing an atsugawa (I hate the name shin soukoku or whatever I'm sorry but I'm actually not. also I cannot pronounce soukoku {this is the real reason I don't use soukoku}) and I don't even ship it lmaoo
#maris bsd 🗞️#like its not a bad ship for my personal tastes#I like them alot more in trios tho I've realized#absolutely adore anytime atsu aku and kyouka are together#two disaters and a teenage girl going through the inexplicable horrors#my favorite#I also desparately wish more people saw the atsulucygawa vision.....#anyways the fic is actually more like before an establish relationship but you can read it as romantic if you want#you'd have to work extra hard though because their bickering isn't like#romantic bickering they're actually kinda getting on each others nerves#but then they have a cute moment talking about their respective agency co workers and realize they do have common ground and that's how muc#they love their lil found dysfunctional families#actually its mostly akutagawa talking Abt port mafia (IM SICK OF PPL SAYING HE DOESNT CARE ABT THEM IDC I wRITE CANON NOW TY) and atsu#realizing that akus never rlly been in a position where he could safely and openly show his affection for anyone#and the one time he did they left (dazai) (this is how the conversation starts)#(aku says smth Abt gin and atsus like “awhh you care alot :3” and akus like “no I don't” and then atsus like “ykw its okay to care Abt ppl”#and akus like “:(( but what if they leave again” and atsus like “but what if they stay?” and basically lists all the reasons why they'd sta#and then akus gets all soft and has a nice moment of caring about everyone he works with#(except maybe chuuya I cant rmb any times they've interacted and i cant think of anything fun or like core memory things they'd do together#and then aku is like “what Abt you and your family? how are they?” and then it's atsus turn to be all sappy about their family#and so then they end up having a way better day than expected AND they walked away from it with a new friend and an even better#understanding of each other and stuff#yeah#reminder I don't even ship atsugawa but wow I feel deeply abt them both.#maybe Id like them as like QPR??#I can see that alot better#but man atsulucygawa....#even they'd probably be QPR though imo#anyways pushing my “aku doesn't feel like he can allow himself to share his affection for people because he doesn't want them to leave”#agenda ty for coming to my Ted talk
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one thing i will never understand is why the general consensus is that kfp 3 is by far the worst in the trilogy. not that i particularly care whether or not other people like the pieces of media i like as much as i do but i literally just dont get where its coming from. like normally when i see criticism of pieces of media i personally like i can understand where people are coming from but with kfp 3 i just dont get it. like the things people critique it for i either straight up find not to be true at all or were just as true for the previous movies. like im convinced at this point that i watched a different movie than everyone else.
#the only real critique i have of it other than the fact that some of the jokes dont really land is that the conclusion of everyone in...#...the panda village just suddenly learning chi and po with no prior experience with chi does all kinds of complex stuff with it and...#...defeats kai#but its pretty in character because hes shown to be very spontaneous#and always seems to be able to figure things out in the heat of the moment#you could say it feels unearned bc he didnt really work towards it but i think it works because the power comes from his friends...#...and family working together to save him#so its kind of the culmination of the community hes created and how he has brought so many people (animals) together#so basically yeah its a little rushed but it still works#i think a missed opportunity tho is having tigress show the others how to do chi#bc hear me out its implied that while not a master of it she does know how to use it#bc when she kicks kai in the jade palace battle it actually does some damage and the visual effects are similar to those when characters...#...are explicitly using it in the movie#i kinda wish they had elaborated on it more#but i get kfp 3 wasnt really about her it was about pos relationship with his dads#me once again being incredibly normal and regular about these movies
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i wish more ppl watched the kinda shows i do but also have the similar humor i do :(
#feels so lonely watching stuff like top boy or snowfall sometimes#like i have friends which are gr8 but sometimes it's like i wish i had the same kinda outstretch of an internet fandom#i could chat n create surprises with#i cant rlly complain tho bcs of the subject matter of most of the shows i like#but like :(#even bel air???#that ones at least more teen dramaish which the internet seems to go wild over#man whatever :(#im just glad the euph*ria craze is over with and everyone acknowledges the directorial male gaze ruin of the idol#if i cant love im at least gonna hate LOL#god i wish more internet ppl loved the wire :(#by internet ppl i dont mean the wannabe gangsters btw lol those can stay away#i just wish the community was more active and creating like the others got#mainly ppl just analyze which is understandable but#idk :(
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