#I will put actual effort into the final version
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FangFest '24 - Day 2
Joslyn Newman, a Tremere, all but had no choice but to defect from the Camarilla after her sire's judgement of her requiring human flesh when feeding. Even before the pack came together she was taught by the Ductus and has become a true member of the Sabbat. Especially after the pack led a mission to capture and diablerize her sire.
#vtmfangfest24#not me grabbing a background from the csp shop#I will put actual effort into the final version#vampire the masquerade#vtm#rowan art#toronto by night#joslyn newman#didnt draw the antitribu mark but it's there
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HIDDEN AGENDA PILOT (2022)
#hidden agenda#hidden agenda the series#joong archen#dunk natachai#joongdunk#jokezo#WE COULD'VE HAD IT ALLLLL#i'll never forgive tee and his team for scrapping this scene and for completely changing the jengpok story 😭😭😭#anyways can y'all believe that i've finally giffed this???#i've been wanting to gif this scene for the LONGEST time like i would say ever since i first saw this trailer lol#however i couldn't find a halfway decent upload without subs#but gmmtv privated the trailer after releasing the ACTUAL one back in june of 2023#ig i just had to put in a little more effort to find a decent-ish version of the trailer... who knew hsjkfhakjsfa#my edits
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youtube
hai guys :3
#my video lol#my audio lol#vocaloid cover#synthv cover#synthesizer v cover#genbu#genbu synthv#evil food eater conchita#i am forcing everyone to look at this. look at my guy ehehehhkjnjkhgmlb AFTER TWO WHOLE ASS YEARS FINALLY#i couldve probably put more effort into this but ITS BEEN IN HERE FOR 2 YEARS i wanna be done w/ it already 😭#so regardless if it kinda sucks a little bit; its wayyy better than the covers i made like ~4? years ago when i was first starting out#was the iku drawing i posted before this foreshadowing?? not necessarily but its rly funny to think abt in hindsight#also rip genbu in a dress that i was gonna draw for this originally 😔✌️ i'd really love to draw more stuff for these covers i make#but it usually never comes out the way i want it to and i figure editing some sorta visualizer like this is better#than keeping some things trapped in my files for so long purely bc my extra ass wants a cool pv. some day maybe but not now#some sick fuck unsubscribed from me after i posted this BYE BITCH i dont miss you at all. live laugh love genbu in this house /j#im not the most obnoxious genbu stan i'd say but you WILL respect him in my house i do not tolerate genbu slander i love that man your hono#yes im extremely based bc he (and eleanor) were THE very first vsynths i ever actually fucked around w/ programwise#but WHATEVER!! idc he is so dear to me i do not regret buying his full version at all (it was impulsive)#the only synth i'd actually consider myself kinda good at tuning LMAO ik people hate how he sounds and have issues w/ him but not me...#these tags are too long girl stfu. anyways tldr; look at silly thang i made w/ my silly man#i love genbu and i love songs about cannibalism <3#Youtube
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hehehe
#the bin#choosing to stop putting much care or effort into my art looking good. i mean. i keep trying to do this. most of what i post is stuff like#that which is why i rarely post. frequently its stuff i actually did intend to do more with but just didnt have the energy and gave up#well i finally did some digital art again. doodle of eternity larva. havent finished it. i think ill probably go back to it eventually but#right now its just a sketchy doodle and im ok with it staying that way. gonna try being ok with my digital art being just that#a lot of the sketchy stuff ive posted is actually stuff i consider wips but like. i put stuff down bc im bored with it and pick it back up#way later after. many months between. recent thing i posted didnt actually take that long in time spent drawing it but it was done over the#2 years. i only actual spent a few days working on it and only a short period on those days but still. im happy with the drawing tho so its#fine. therss no time limit to wips. i could color my art from 6 years ago if i wanted. who care.#well. im prob gonna be doing sketch dumps at some point once ive fixed my dumb brain. and ill probably do better versions if a lot of them#way later. most will probably stay silly sketches though.
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Dating Headcanons F.H
What it’s Like to Date Five Hargreeves
Pairings — Five Hargreeves x Reader (pronouns not specified)
Summary — My headcanons for if you were Five’s lover.
Warnings — opinions, no plot, it’s all over the place, last one is semi-NSFW.
A/N — i try to avoid nsfw with five because yk.. in the show, he’s physically thirteen but this one was too funny not to add. let’s all just pretend there was a happy ending okay 😭😭. i wrote this before season four came out so let’s pretend it ended happily.
— if you want another version where it’s just headcanons of you and five in the apocalypse i’m down for that.
— I see headcanons where Five is straight up mean, manipulative, and where he’s just using you.
— To me, that’s not Five being in love with you. Have you seen how he treats Delores? HE’S SO SWEET TO HER.
— So if you’re his lover, he will give you princess treatment like no other, holy shit.
—He’ll prepare breakfast so it’s ready to be eaten when you wake up.
— He thinks breakfast in bed is a recipe for disaster so he never does that.
— If you take a while to wake up he’ll wake you up.
— “My love, breakfast is ready.” He’ll whisper into your ear before pressing a kiss onto your temple, then one on your forehead, then your nose… then finally a chaste kiss on your lips.
— He’ll tuck you in bed at night and make sure you’re all snug before leaving. If you can’t sleep he’ll read to you.
— With him around, you genuinely never have to open a door. In addition to paying for every meal, he always walks on the outside of the sidewalk. He also pulls the chair out for you when you sit and showers you with praise.
— Sometimes the praise is simple whispers in your ear because he isn’t much into PDA.
— There was never an official wedding, he stole two matching rings and gave one to you.
— He’d like to have an official wedding.
— If he has to worry about the apocalypse he’ll probably neglect you only because he thinks the fate of the world is in his hands.
— He loves going on simple dates, whether it’s at Griddy’s Doughnuts, a simple stroll in the park, or a little painting place.
— He’s fancy but he doesn’t see the point in expensive restaurants. He likes the little things.
— He loves to make and paint pottery with you, it’s his favourite thing to do.
— When he can’t sleep he’ll come over to your place and sit on the roof with you.
— If you fall asleep he’ll Blink into your room and tuck you in, and he’ll even leave a note for you to read when you wake up.
— It usually goes along the lines of..
“You fell asleep, don’t worry I made sure you got back in your room and I picked up all your stuffies from the floor and put them on the bed with you.”
— He struggles with insomnia.
— He’ll write you love letters even though it’s more convenient to send a text. He loves you and he’s willing to put effort in love notes.
— His primary love languages are quality time and acts of service.
— He doesn’t show much affection in public.
— He doesn’t mind holding your hand though.
— Five won’t be afraid to hold your hand, wrap an arm around your shoulders or waist while he’s with his siblings.
— Kisses and hugs are private though.
— Despite being private, he doesn’t hide the fact he’s dating you.
— If anyone tries anything on you, Five will glare daggers. If that’s not enough, he’ll threaten them, and if they keep pushing he’ll make them bleed (but not too severe 🥰)
— He’s hella protective.
— You make midnight munchies together.
— He’ll refuse to dance with you in the kitchen at 2am but he’ll reluctantly say yes and end up actually enjoying it.
— Same goes for dancing in the rain. He pretends to hate it but he loves it and you know he does.
— You always make pasta or noodles for midnight munchies.
— One time you made cookies and accidentally woke up Klaus who ate the cookie dough before you got to put it in the oven.
— When you guys had sex for the first time Klaus congratulated you and Five with a cake that said ‘virgin’ in the middle of a 🚫 and woke you up the next day with confetti.
— sorry, i know i said i’d have a part three to my ben hargreeves fic but i wrote it and didn’t edit it.. and it didn’t seem entertaining enough to post, i’m sorry.
— if you want headcanons with the apocalypse involved, let me know <3
#five hargreeves#five hargreeves x reader#tua#umbrella academy#the umbrella academy#five x reader#five hargreeves dating headcanons#five hargreeves headcanons#five hargreeves fluff#hargreeves#ben hargreeves#klaus hargreeves#five hargreeves imagine#five x y/n#five#the umbrella academy imagines#the umbrella academy imagine#umbrella academy fluff#umbrella academy scenarios
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SVT and Jealousy
Requested? Yes!
Requests: "seventeen reaction to their partner being jealous" and "seventeen getting jealous over their partner? could be because someone’s flirting with their partner or maybe their partner is spending more time with a coworker or classmate to complete a project"
A/N: this one was a bit of a doozy since I decided to address both requests in one go.
A/N #2: This is the new and improved version which includes all of the members. Thank you to the person that let me know that one was missing. I'm not sure if reblogs that are already out there will contain this fix, but just an FYI.
Seungcheol
When he’s jealous: everyone saw this coming. It takes very little for him to be like, “hmm, that person is too close” or “that person’s talking to you too much”. Might insert him into the conversation both verbally and physically in a way that screams that you’re taken. Sometimes you’ll roll your eyes about it and call him a big baby, but sometimes you might have to have a serious conversation about whether he trusts you or not. Will still want to make it apparent that you’re taken even if it’s not super aggressive, so that’s kind of a non-negotiable here, I fear.
When you’re jealous: oddly, I think he’d be confused by this. Not because he doesn’t understand jealousy, but because he feels there’s no reason. He’s so unapologetically into you that he’s totally lost when you say someone was too close to him or talking to him too much. You’ll have to equate your jealousy to his own for him to ever get it - you know, the typical “would you like it if I did that?” He would not.
Jeonghan
When he’s jealous: such a rarity. He’s pretty secure in general, I think, so on a typical day it never occurs to him to be jealous. But I think if there were someone that you’re closer with or have a deeper history with (like a close friend that seems to blur lines or an ex that you still see from time to time), he might feel a little jealousy stir. SUPER passive aggressive if he’s ever feeling this way. You’ll leave an interaction and have to be like “what the hell was that???” Will never admit to said jealousy.
When you’re jealous: he actually wants you to be a little jealous. Starting to sound like a potential red flag, but hear me out. Won’t do anything crazy, but might not shut down a conversation that he recognizes as a tad too friendly right away, only to watch how you react. I believe he’d do this to reassure himself that you care. If you tell him something like that really bothers you, then I think he’d stop though.
Joshua
When he’s jealous: this absolutely manifests as insecurity. If you talk a little too much about one of your coworkers, it might make him think about what that coworker has that he doesn’t. Might not ever admit to the jealousy itself, but will certainly ask for a little extra reassurance when he’s feeling like this. 'Do you still love me?' 'Are you happy with our relationship?' 'Are there things I could do to make you happier?' Put this sweet, sweet man out of his misery.
When you’re jealous: oh, he never means for this to happen, I promise. He wants you to feel secure in the relationship, the same way he wants security himself. But he’s so friendly sometimes that both you and everyone else might misread it as something else. If you tell him you were bothered by something, he’ll make a real effort to eliminate the possibility of that happening again, but it is what it is sometimes.
Jun
When he’s jealous: it’s obvious because he clams up. Will give very brief answers with a little furrow in his eyebrows until you finally ask him if he’s alright and he falls apart. “Do you even love me anymore?!?” The drama!! You’ll have to press for specifics about what made him feel this way so you can avoid it in the future. At the very least, reassure this big baby that you still love him.
When you’re jealous: smug for only a moment. Quite literally a single second. He doesn’t like the idea that you doubt his love, just like you wouldn’t like it when he doubts yours. So he’ll be more cognizant in future interactions and if something can’t be helped, he’s reassuring you right away that it wasn’t what you might think.
Hoshi
When he’s jealous: so pouty and sulky. Where as Jun might bite his tongue for a little bit, I don’t think Soonyoung would. He’ll let you know right away that he doesn’t like this person and might even beg you to put some serious distance between you and them. Another big baby to reassure, but he’s really just nervous that you might not like him as much as he thought.
When you’re jealous: huge question mark floating above his head. Then when it clicks, he’s quick to assure you it’s nothing like that and you have nothing to worry about. Will lay it on thick just because he wants you to understand how into you he is. Will freely admit that there’s not a single thought in his head besides you a lot of the time. What you don’t know is that that conversation you saw across the room consisted of ‘my partner’ this and ‘my partner’ that.
Wonwoo
When he’s jealous: will never say it. He’s a lock box when it comes to this. If you do manage to pry this out of him, I think it won’t manifest in words as much as it would in actions in the bedroom. Would not be super possessive in public, but will want the reassurance that only he can do that and see you like that, you know?
When you’re jealous: smug for a moment as well, before he’s putting your mind at ease right away. Even if he won’t say when he’s jealous, he’ll tell you exactly what he thinks of that person that was just a little too close to him for your liking, even or rather especially if it’s mean. This might also manifest in the bedroom if only because he’s just not a man of many words.
Woozi
When he’s jealous: will become pretty irritable about it. When you leave this event, he’s snippy and seems annoyed with everything you say. This honestly might lead to a little bit of a fight and it might take some time to reassure him on where you stand. Really just wants to know that you’re his as much as he’s yours but won’t feel like he can come right out and say that.
When you’re jealous: totally lost. He works with a ton of artists, but why is it an issue now? If you say it’s because you’re sure this person is into him what with the messages that have been going back and forth, he’ll flat out say he doesn’t care about this other person. Would be pretty intentional about drawing boundaries with this person from then on because he trusts that you’re seeing something real there.
DK
When he’s jealous: oh boy. How can he draw attention to himself immediately? If his big personality doesn’t work, then he’ll resort to making it apparent that you’re taken, probably by just coming over and introducing himself as your boyfriend. If you raise an eyebrow at him about it later, he’ll shrug. “What, am I not?” Never mind that he’s praying that you agree and he didn't somehow miss an entire breakup.
When you’re jealous: much like Joshua, he’s perhaps a little too friendly for his own good. Totally oblivious about the other person’s intentions until it’s a little too late. The moment this person tries to touch him or say something flirty, he’s dragging you over to him, saying “hey, have you met my partner that I’m super in love with???” Not subtle at all and will not let you linger on those sort of thoughts.
Mingyu
When he’s jealous: Another one that could be a bit intense in making sure someone understands you’re taken. Like s.coups, it takes very little for him to get to this point. Talk about clingy anytime, but specifically in this situation. Doesn’t even have to say anything because he's already hanging all over you, but trust me he will. It’s ‘baby’ this and ‘love of my life’ that when he inserts himself into the conversation. Totally good once your attention is back on him, so another of the big baby club.
When you’re jealous: A natural flirt and absolutely won’t mean it. I picture that you will have to be just as aggressive as he is when he’s jealous for him to get that he’s letting a few too many little comments or touches slide. But he wants you to cling to him too, so while I don’t think he’d go out of his way to make you jealous necessarily, he doesn’t hate it if you are.
Minghao
When he’s jealous: ooo another passive aggressive one. After about the fifth snippy comment, you’re pulling him off to the side to ask what his deal is. “That person is my deal. They’re coming on to you.” No matter whether you realized it or not, if you say something like “so? I want you, not them,” he’ll just do a little ‘oh’ and let it go.
When you’re jealous: I’ll be honest, I think he’d be able to read the other person’s intentions and will never let it progress to something that could make you jealous if he can help it. But sometimes he can’t help it because it’s work related and he has to be friendly in front of cameras etc., so he’ll be quick to remind you of the same thing you tell him - that he wants you, not them.
Seungkwan
When he’s jealous: so damn snarky. This person will know that Seungkwan doesn’t like them. You’ll know Seungkwan doesn’t like them. Everyone will know Seungkwan doesn’t like them. You or someone else might have to even tell him to lay off a bit. That snark might be directed at you too, and you’ll have to wait until he’s ready to really talk about it before you understand the issue.
When you’re jealous: another one that the friendliness will get the best of him some times. He’s such a social butterfly, and to some extent you might have to accept it. Still, he doesn’t want to make you feel insecure about the relationship, so whether you’re around or not, he’s talking fondly of you to let others know he’s happily taken.
Vernon
When he’s jealous: I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, he’s not that aloof!!! Totally recognizes when someone’s coming on to you, but I don’t think it’s in his nature to act jealously. He sits back and watches, will maybe be a little uncomfortable, but you genuinely may never know that he feels that way. Feels better quite literally as soon as your attention is on him again. That’s actually all the reassurance he needs.
When you’re jealous: now I have to admit…. This might be where he’s a tiny bit aloof. May not recognize that someone’s hitting on him, like, ever. At least not until someone else mentions it. This might be tough at first, because he wants to recognize when this is happening to put a stop to it for you, but usually doesn’t realize until it’s far too late. Eventually, he’ll realize he can just casually mention you at the top of the conversation to imply he’s taken. He might even let himself look a little lovesick too for good measure.
Chan
When he’s jealous: retreats into himself and sulks. When you find him later, he might say something snarky like “where’s your friend?” Please shrug and say I don’t know so he can breathe for a minute about the fact that you don’t seem to care about that person. Might need extra reassurance here and there to feel secure about situations like this because, like I’ve said for others, he wants to know your his as much as he’s yours.
When you’re jealous: another one that’s sometimes too friendly for their own good. But he’s perceptive about it and when he realizes how you might take it, particularly if you’re showing signs of being jealous, he’s quick to abandon this person and smother you with affection until you get it. I mean, squishing your cheeks, kissing you, and loudly telling you he loves you and only you, regardless of how public the setting might be. Will lay it on thick because he doesn’t want you to have any doubts.
#seventeen#svt#seventeen x reader#svt x reader#seventeen reactions#svt reactions#seventeen imagines#svt imagines#seungcheol#jeonghan#joshua#jun#hoshi#wonwoo#woozi#dk#mingyu#minghao#seungkwan#vernon#dino
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calling your friend a pet name in front of your boyfriend ITOSHI RIN
cw: jealous & clingy rin, fem!reader wc: 642 reo's version
you and rin were lost in your own world, cuddling on the couch, completely ignoring the gore film that played on the television screen. you sat comfortably on his lap, arms around his shoulders as he held your waist gently and smothered you with tender kisses, his lips pressing against every feature of your face. despite the horrifying soundtracks, blood curdling screams, and the desperate pleas of characters standing on death’s door, the two of you still paid them no mind, the gruesome sounds fading into the background as you focused on rin’s kisses. how romantic.
in that moment, a knock on the door of your apartment catches your attention, breaking what was about to be a makeout session, “oh, that must be…” your words trail off. rin reluctantly lets go of your waist, sinking back onto the couch with an exasperated sigh as he watches you head towards the front door.
“were you expecting someone?” he asks. the interruption irritated him considering the amount of effort he put to push aside his arrogance and finally approach you with the intent of kissing you until you couldn’t breathe.
you open the door, and your friend wastes no time, pressing a bag of your favourite sweets into your chest, pulling you into a tight hug, “babeee! thanks for lending me the textbook!” she chirps happily, “the teacher woulda given me an earful,” she pouts, planting a friendly kiss on your cheek.
you quickly reciprocate her hug, “aww, sweetheart, you really got these for me?” you laugh, placing your textbook and the candy bag on the foyer table, “you’re making me blush,” you add jokingly with a wink.
your boyfriend’s face contorted into one of confusion, his eyes narrowing as his fingers clenched the couch at his sides. he quickly moved towards you, grabbing your wrist and pulling you to his side with a frown.
“oh, rinnie, this is f/n, she’s one of my closest fr—” you try to speak, only to get cut off by rin, who was glaring daggers at the source of his frustration, the girl near the front door (and the bag of sweets).
“why is she so clingy?” despite his hardest efforts to appear unaffected by the affectionate pet names—and the kiss on your cheek— his voice betrayed his underlying jealousy and bitterness, “and ‘sweetheart’? seriously?”
you blink in both astonishment and shock, taken aback by rin’s uncharacteristic behaviour. this was a first. was he actually jealous? “rin, are you pouting?”
“hmph,” he glances away, “obviously not.”
“woahhh!! Is the itoshi rin jeal—” your friend was cut off mid-sentence by rin’s glare, warning her not to push her luck because his patience was wearing thin.
“ooh, w-well, i’m gonna leave now, haha– bye babe!”
you laugh, “sorry for his behaviour, swee— i mean, f/n,” you thank her for the gift and close the door behind her.
rin rolls his eyes, and then, without warning, he lifts you into his arms and carries you to your shared bedroom, “r-rin?” you softly gasp as you squirm against his chest.
“hm, you’re going to have to make it up to me,” he mumbles, gently laying you down on the bed as he snuggles closer to you. wrapping his arm around your waist, he pulls you so your back is pressed against his chest while his lips trail soft kisses along your neck, “alright?” he asks, though it’s evident he has no intention of stopping regardless of your response.
you relax your body as you allow him to decorate your neck with small hickies, “i’ve never seen you jealous before,” you smile teasingly, “funny how you called her clingy. who’s the clingy one now?”
he rolls his eyes, giving your waist a gentle squeeze as he buries his face in the crook of your neck, his cheeks slightly pink,
“shut up.”
-
comments appreciated!!
if you're interested in a royal/fantasy au story; wizard ness x princess y/n (no kaiser), click here!
#bllk#bllk x reader#blue lock#bllk fluff#blue lock x reader#rin itoshi#itoshi rin#rin itoshi x reader#bllk rin#blue lock rin#bllk manga#itoshi rin x y/n#itoshi rin x reader#bllk itoshi rin
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Wade LOVES Halloween. Absolutely LOVES it, but his first Halloween with Logan, he decides not to go too overboard. After all, the apartment is Logan's safe space, and he knows he gets easily overwhelmed and filling it with a bunch of loud things that jump out doesn't feel the best option for his PTSD.
He puts up a few decorations, and leaves it at that.
Logan doesn't realise how much the holiday means to Wade until one of his lunch meet ups with Vanessa. She makes a comment about how odd it is that Wade isn't hosting his usual Halloween party this year, and Logan frowns.
"I didn't think he was that into Halloween."
Vanessa snorts, "you kidding me? Our apartment used to look like party city in October."
Logan is confused, until he remembers the way Wade had subtly asked everytime he put up a small Halloween decoration, asking Logan's opinion on the placement, and it clicks in his head that Wade probably thinks he wouldn't like the apartment filled with Halloween stuff.
And yeah, it's not really his favourite holiday, but it seems to be Wade's and he'll be damned if the merc doesn't celebrate it on his accord.
He goes all out. He's not all that familiar with Halloween traditions, so he consults Laura for help. She explains what a 'boo basket' is, and he just sort of stares at her, "why would Wade want a plastic bucket filled with halloween versions of crap he's already got?"
"You're such a man," is her groaned reply, and Logan just adds it to his list of stuff to do.
By the time Halloween rolls around, he's honestly a bit nervous. He spends all day decorating the apartment while Wade is out. He learns from Ness that Wade hates actual pumpkin carving because he can't stand the smell or the feel of the pumpkin guts, so he sets their pumpkins on the coffee table, covered over with a spooky table cloth, with a variety of paints to decorate.
Every inch of the apartment is covered in the tackiest Halloween decor possible. Laura helped him make Halloween cupcakes. Wade's bat basket is sat on the kitchen table, filled up with his favourite candy, a ghost blanket and a little pumpkin stuffed toy. He loads up Hocus Pocus on the TV, since Ness told him it was one of Wade's favourites.
The couples costume is the one thing he insisted on figuring out himself. He'd honestly spent an embarrassingly long amount of time working something out, and he's a little nervous Wade will hate it.
"Honey I'm-"
Logan squirms in the following silence, feeling uncharacteristically anxious. He really wanted to get this right, and he really hopes he hasn't missed anything important and that Wade doesn't think the whole thing is just stupid because he really did try here.
"Are you... Finn?"
"Yeah. I got you uh, princess bubblegum, and..." he whistles for Mary, who waited ever so patiently behind the couch, and she comes scampering out in her Jake costume.
Wade is still just staring, and Logan shuffles awkwardly, "Laura's gonna be Marceline. if you don't want to dress up that's fine. Or if you don't like all this... I can take it down? I wasn't sure what-"
And then he's got an armful of Wade, who's fully wrapped around him, and Logan just barely catches him.
"You like it?" Logan asks, because even if the reaction is pretty telling he needs to know for sure.
"Like it? Like it?! Peanut I fucking love it! I fucking love you," Wade emphasises, tightening his grip, and Logan feels his body relax finally.
"You'll have to thank Laura and Ness. I wouldn't of had a clue what to do otherwise-"
Wade shuts him up with a kiss.
"Thank you, sweetheart. Honestly, you're the best," Wade smiles, a decent that nickname always makes Logan's knees feel a little weak.
"Anything for you, bub. You not realised that by now?"
And it's not a joke, not really, and he can tell Wade knows that by the way his smile softens.
They go to Vanessa's Halloween party that night, and Logan's convinced she crowns them winners of the costume contest out of pity for all of Logan's effort the last few days, but it doesn't matter anyway because of the way the matching 'best dressed' sashes make Wade somehow light up even more for the rest of the night.
#bit late but i was doing a halloween party yesterday and was exhausted by the end of the day#deadclaws#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine#deadclaws fic#drabble#peanutbub#mywriting#halloween
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Can I please request Bill thinking he finally found a human who won't betray him, someone he really enjoyed the company of (but would never admit to that because Bill) only to find them trying to destroy the portal?
This is long as shit, be warned and I tried to keep bill in character as much as possible but he might be ooc at some points.
Your first meeting with Bill was one he didn’t expect. When faced with something you know isn’t normal, the response Bill was expecting was you running away until you were out of sight, talking off the ears of anyone who’d head your warning but you instead smiled at him.
‘Nice bow tie and top hat sentient triangle.’ You said.
‘The names Bill Cipher, so you can stop calling me that name, I find it rather insulting, and thanks! I dress to impress but most people just run away or scream bloody murder to appreciate my effort to look presentable’ he replies, finding himself a new human pet to play with after swearing to himself that Sixer would be the last, Bill was a liar and he knew it, messing with humans and destroying their physique was the most genuine fun he’s had in a long, long while.
This was merely the begging of yours and Bills weird friendship and it was only going to get weirder from this point onwards.
Being friends with a sentient triangle dream demon was…a experience indeed as you’d often wake to him floating above you, drinking something through a silly straw and wearing a hat unlike the usual slim black top hat he wore, only to find out that he had somehow snuck several chicken into your room that had scaly dragon legs and could breath fire.
That took a while for you to get ride of them with a wooden broom and not have it set on fire when the chickens retaliate with fire.
‘How did you find such things?’ You’d ask Bill when sitting down to eat breakfast.
He shrugs. ‘You search for a realm that swaps certain anatomy of animals and play a demented game of mix and match to see what monstrosities to humanity could be made and bingo! Infinite possibilities of scaring or scaring people for the rest of their lives! ha ha!’
‘And chickens with dragon feet and could breath fire is your go to choice, wasn’t there anything else you could’ve chosen from?’ You inquired as you took a bite of your breakfast and immediately grimacing when you felt something was off.
‘Oh sure there was and- oh you’ve found where I put my mealworms from last week.’ Bill casually told you as he plays with his silly straw while you spat your breakfast out into a nearby bin, wiped your mouth before pushing the plate away from you as your appetite was ruined.
'glad to be of help. buddy.' you replied as you decided that it would be best to wait for bill to disappear before attempting to eat and or drink again.
As the weeks progress Bill found himself enjoying your company more than he originally suspected, sure you were fun to mess with and play impractical pranks on from time to time. However -and he’ll never admit this ever- he had come to actually enjoy spending time with you and getting to know you outside of his personal human plaything.
Bill begrudgingly remembered your least favourite family member and why, your favourite colour, your first pets name and so much more that he would deem unimportant; to things that were deep and personal to you such as your fear of being alone or not taken seriously enough. To which he offered some -albeit questionable- advice.
‘Listen if everyone takes themselves seriously or someone wants everyone else to take them seriously, then who’s going to laugh at kids when they fall over, or at people who make an fool of themselves as they fall upon their own sword of hubris.’ Bill tells you once as you both sat on the roof of your home, star gazing.
‘And what am I meant to take away from all that ?’ You asked, not understanding what he was getting with this.
‘Don’t take yourself too seriously or expect others to either when you know that version of yourself will be someone you’ll sooner regret wishing for.’ Bill responded.
‘Do you miss home?’ You then asked him out of the blue and Bill couldn’t help but be a little taken aback by it.
‘Home..’ bill trailed off as he took his hat off, reached a hand inside and pulled out a glowing atom, the remains of his home. ‘This is what remains of my home.’ He tells you rather sombrely, remembering the last time he told a human of his origins, only for him to dedicate himself into destroying him.
‘I’m..I’m so sorry I didn’t-‘ you’d tried to apologise but bill held up a hand as he returned the remains of his home back into his top hat before putting it back on his head.
‘It’s fine. I was bound to tell you about that sooner or later.’ He waves his hand but you could tell you struck a nerve.
‘Sooo…what happened to your home, only if you don’t mind me asking.’ - you
‘It was destroyed by a monster.’ Bill answered with a distant look in his eye.
‘As stupid as this will probably sound to you but you’ll always have a home with me, I hope you know that.’ You told him with the most genuine smile across your face and Bill couldn’t help but feel…touched by your words. He’s thrown and done everything to push you to the brink and all you’ve done was withstand him and his shenanigans all the while standing your ground.
‘You’re a strange human and your sentimentality makes me physically sick but…I guess I appreciate the thought.’ Bill had to force himself to say, he might as well have swallowed down stones with how hard it seemed for him to say anything remotely considerate. You were quite possibly the only human that showed him kindness and compassion and that made the dream demon feel weird and out of his depth.
Now that Bill was thinking about it not once had you ever given him a reason to distrust you, sure he was suspicious of you at first, but overtime you have proven yourself to be the most trustworthy person in his long, long life. You had made him feel unlike anything he’s felt before and that made him on edge, just in the case that he was being lured into a false sense of security later down the line, but nope you didn’t do such a thing and stayed open and honest him no matter what.
It almost made bill feel bad about the shit he put you through but soon he’d come to regret saying these words, for not even a week later and Bill caught you red handed destroying his portal after searching the house for you when you didn’t greet him like usual.
‘WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!’ He screamed, his body burning brightly at the betrayal you’ve just committed, was everything you said a lie? Were you just as good at pulling people along as he was? How long have you been waiting for this exact moment to get back at him?
‘What does it look like, I’m destroying the portal.’ Your reply was stone cold as you continued to dismantle the portal piece by piece while Bill shouted profanities at you.
‘YOU LIED TO ME!’ - bill
‘That’s cute coming from someone who takes sick enjoyment in breaking every human he comes across, pushing them into utter madness with no remorse!’ You chuckled humourlessly as you looked at the dream demon who looked about ready to either cry or combust.
‘YOU LIED TO ME!’ Bill repeated as his anger only grew stronger the more he began to think back on all of your heart to heart moments and wonder whether they were fake too? Did you not mean it when you said that he had a home with you?
‘I didn’t lie, I just didn’t tell you the whole truth.’ You retorted. ‘Now are you going to shut up and kill me or keep ranting on how I somehow betrayed you because either way I don’t care.’ You added as you watched the triangular demon closely.
‘Kill you? Oh no sweetie, you’ve just earned a fate WORSE THEN DEATH! Eternal torture until you speak the truth and then torture you so more because I find your pathetic humans pain funny!’ Bill laughed maniacally. ‘And to think I was starting to like you, you just had to go and stab me in the back!’
You shrug, trying to hide how scared you were in this moment, knowing that even if you did scream for help it would be far too late by the time Ford, Stan or either dipper or Mabel to save you and you were okay with that. ‘First time for everything right?’ You asked with a smile. ‘I’m sure you’ll get use to it sooner or later.’
Bill’s eye was wide and looking maniacal in the moment as his voice was oddly and unnervingly calm that it froze your blood. ‘You humans might act brave in the face of danger, but what I’m capable will have you wishing you never picked up that wrench or tried playing the hero. For playtime is over.’
#gravity falls x reader#gravity falls imagine#gravity falls imagines#gravity Falls x you#gravity falls#the book of bill#bill cipher x you#bill cipher imagine#bill cipher imagines#bill cipher x reader
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there's this video you've probably seen already where a woman is shaking in front of a microphone and delicately tries to ask - how can i make my husband listen to me, i've tried everything, i don't want to seem ungrateful and the other man laughs - the problem is that you married a man, we're only listening 25% of the time and we only understand 5% of that! and the audience laughs and the woman laughs and you just sat there, phone in your hand, letting the sound of it echo
and the thing is that people make think-pieces about it (isn't this one of them) and satire versions and "flipping the script" which is good and fun but at the end of the day, there's some truth in that man's response about men-not-listening. and you have tried to language that feeling for years, this sense that you can only take up 33% of a conversation before others view it as being "dominating".
it's not that they aren't listening, it's that the action they're taking is purposefully silencing. it's different. you accidentally-don't-listen a lot; just because the world is loud and you're distracted. you don't mean anything by it. and the truth is that the man who spoke is relying on that to be true of you; the way it's true of everyone. but there is a different undertone to his kind of not-listening. what he means is they don't respect you and you shouldn't expect them to. there is a difference between oh shit i forgot to take the trash out and why didn't you remind me to do it, just like there is a difference between i didn't realize you wanted to go out this weekend and why do you expect me to plan things why can't you just tell me where we're going.
and the thing is that it isn't just him, and it's actually not just because of your gender - your skin, your class status, your weight, their ableism - it happens often. so often it feels like a tightness around your throat and a weight in your stomach. you're not even "really" allowed to be upset about it, because to them it's a joke. and they laugh. and you know exactly the amount of work that goes into every conversation. how you have to work to condense down your thoughts into intelligent, crisp soundbites; worried someone will try to swoop in and cut you off. and there's this sense from everyone else - oh stop being so sensitive, are you really upset just because they weren't listening and you don't know how to say the way that feels when it happens constantly.
there's that video of the science summit where a woman in the audience finally says let her speak please! and the whole crowd bursts into applause and the man leading the summit holds up his hands and bows his head and says oops, sorry! like what he did was awkward and embarrassing, a little social gaffe that happens easily. later in your meetings, you're asked to take notes, and you don't say anything, you just hear let her speak please! ringing in your head and know that you'll never be brave enough for that kind of thing. and besides. think of all the people who agree this was a one-off, he just got excited and all of the people who say one man is not indicative of all of society
at the dinner table you're talking about someone you don't like and how he's not good to his girlfriend and how she always has to remind him to put the effort in and before him, she was glowing with curiosity and passion but now she just seems... tired, unhappy. that he likes the way she burns out; she stays home and takes care of him and their 2 kids. and your father sniffs and says that men take a while to learn those kinds of things. and you just stare at him and think about your childhood and are like - no wonder i turned out like this
and you want to say - there's no fucking secret school or mystic form of communication. i was not sent to Rearing a Child University. i did not graduate from Getting Chores Done College. i ask questions and i listen and i pay attention, because that's basic fucking human decency. it stems from respect, and how i respect others and their agency. i clean the house because someone should clean. not because it comes "naturally".
hell, you had to google "how to boil an egg" the other day, just because you usually make them scrambled. you can never remember which of the 2 bathroom cleaners make chlorine gas, only that two of them definitely do. you've accidentally bleached your clothes. it took you like 3 years of self-teaching before you figured out how to actually cook things correctly - for that whole time, you burnt or undercooked everything. but you did teach yourself; just like you taught yourself how to listen with empathy. just like how you taught yourself to think before you speak. to be kind first, to be better at communicating. it seemed like a good thing, an adult thing.
the joke the man in the video makes is that women say i'm fine! when they are not fine. and you think about the 150 conversations that happened around that; about how she probably has had so many arguments with her husband. how she said i'm upset you don't take me anywhere and he got mad at her because of course i do, you made me go to that stupid restaurant like last week and she probably said that's not what i'm saying and he said now i'm supposed to be psychic or something and she said no of course not and he said how am i supposed to know what to do when you don't even like everything and she said i do like things and he said well how am i supposed to win? and her pastor probably told her to be more grateful because they do things at all, even if she has to plan them and her mom probably told her that's just how men are honey and she probably cried over her journal, trying to figure out why the fuck she "has everything" and is still so bitterly, horribly unhappy
and how, in your life, for so many reasons, you looked down the barrel of another argument; of explaining yourself and being vulnerable and begging for help again. how many times you just said i'm fine because it was better than doing that again; it was better than wringing yourself out when it's literally easier to just pretend. because he wasn't going to listen. your father wasn't going to be better and your boyfriend wasn't going to be better and your boss wasn't going to be more respectful.
and you sit in front of a video of a woman shaking, looking horrible and guilt-wrought that she's even asking this question. and you know; deep in your heart - that's you. in a different life, you are her. you've stood in her spot. and you had to listen while someone else cackled - why would we bother to notice when you talk?
#writeblr#warm up#this is something im legit still unpacking the effects of#btw this is one of those intersectional feminist blogs#gender plays a role but let's be honest - this silencing comes from disrespect which can come from MANY things#white women will do it to women of color#it exists in many forms and permutations#but fuck that video made my blood run COLD#you know it's bad out there when my HORRIFICALLY right-wing trad cath father even admitted ''it's bad out right now''
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Snail important question;
Of any line-up of characters of your choice-
Who do you think is attracted to competency,
Who is attracted to stupidity,
Who can go either way,
And who is attracted to both at the same time (imagine;
Reader: sorry I'm late I had to fight off two different ships
Them: is that how you got that bruise on your face?
Reader: oh... Actually, I wasn't looking and pulled a push door off its' hinges into my face
Them, kicking off their pants: god you're so fucking stupid, sit on my face
)
Also, I feel like there are different versions of competency and stupidity. Street smarts vs social obliviousness. Book smarts vs functionally illiterate. Strategic/battle smarts vs what-do-you-mean-flashing-the-enemy-isn't-a-valid-distraction?
(Zoro is completely math smart and dumb in every other way)
I could imagine Luffy would be attracted to hyper specific competency. If you're really into a specific thing and good at it and it's your dream he would absolutely love it even if it sounds like you're speaking gibberish to him. He wouldn't even think of it as weird - I mean, no more weird than any other dream he doesn't personally understand - he's certainly not the type to judge based on societal norms. You could talk his ear off about the reproductive habits of different animals and he wouldn't get why everyone else doesn't like to hear it when they're eating but hey more food for him.
Snail. Your asks always know how to get the better of me. Have a series of little drabbles, dear.
Competency, Stupidity, Duality
Masterlist here
Word Count: 410+, 510+, 580+
Synopsis: They can't help what attracted them to you. No matter what you did, they simply couldn't get enough of you. Their emotions finally catch up with them, and they confess their adoration for you.
Themes: variety x gn!reader, feelings, injury, mentions of battles, finally giving in, all different 'reader' inserts, confessions of love, kid x reader, zoro x reader, killer x reader, angst, fluff, sweetness.
Notes: I wasn't expecting to write this today, but I've been thinking about the big boys lately and I needed to give them some love. Something about trios lately.
Tag List: @sordidmusings @nerium-lil @feral-artistry @since-im-already-here @writingmysanity @indydonuts @gingernut1314 @i-am-vita @carrotsunshine @mfreedomstuff @daydreamer-in-training
Competency: Eustass Kid
When Eustass Kid noticed how quick and sharp you were to react in life or death circumstances, he was immediately smitten with you. Being a Straw-Hat, your ambitions and dreams were fostered by your playful captain as you sailed aboard the Thousand Sunny. Your ability to interact flawlessly by balancing the combined efforts of the three crews had him intrigued by your charisma.
Fighting by your side was something he didn’t expect to affect him so much. The way you researched the strengths and weaknesses of all three crews sailing and fighting together was admirable. Asserting yourself by asking Law to push and pull you closer to the fight with the Ope-Ope no Mi ability, while fighting side-by-side with Massacre Soldier Killer in close quarters, had him left wordless.
After the battle finishes, he watched as you hastily aided your crew of their injuries while disregarding your own; putting others first while adding pressure to your hand-gash, hovering it over your head to slow the bleeding. He couldn’t get enough of you.
He needed you to know how he felt about you, but being in the presence of Luffy and Law always seemed to bring out the more juvenile side of attitude. His simple attraction and infatuation with you had to be revealed to you in due time, but he couldn’t risk sounding like an idiot in front of you. He would have to simply wait until you were alone and unoccupied before he made his move to take care of you after taking care of others.
Slowly approaching you as you sat down against the tangerine grove aboard the Thousand Sunny, his shadow shrouded your form and prompted you to gaze up into his scarred, sheepish face. Your smile caused his heart to beat harder and his head to swirl with a variety of "what-ifs". Gulping back his insecurities, he knelt down in front of you.
“Let me take care of that for you,” he offered with a soft smirk, “You’ve done so much for others, and I think your hand needs some seeing to.”
“If you say so, Captain Kid,” you shrug, offering your injured hand delicately to him and listening to his every instruction as he treats you, “I wasn’t aware you had any medical training.” He straps your hand in a bandage, placing down the final ties before holding your injured hand in his.
“I don’t,” he shrugged with a smile atop his painted lips, “But I’ve lost an arm before, and I don’t want to see that happen to you.”
“You’re-...” he stuttered over his words, gazing at your hand before softly drifting his tired eyes up, “...-You amaze me. Truly, amaze me.” You place your other hand on his, never once removing your eyes from his face as he offers you such kindness.
“Thank you, sir,” you nod to him with a soft smile, “You amaze me, too.”
Stupidity: Roronoa Zoro
“Why would you do that?” Zoro roared at you, hovering his body over yours and caging your face-down body within a shield of his own. The gashes on your back were deep, your body weeping out the red essence and staining your clothes with it.
“C-Couldn’t risk yours,” you stuttered out with a soft smile, “H’was gonna g-get yours. Didn’t want you to wear the shame.” His eyes widened, filling with a steam of glossy tears that threatened to spill over the moment you stuttered out your confession. “That’s what you said, wasn’t it? Mark on the back is a swordsman’s greatest shame?”
Drip.
Drip.
Drip.
One after one, soft tears spilt down his cheeks and mixed with the fluids pooling at your back. He leaned down towards you, the heat of battle dying down with the swift, flaming kick of the blonde cook and giggling chuckles of your captain, Luffy.
“You’re a fucking idiot,” he sniffed his sobs back as he leaned down to cage you, “Can’t you see? None of that fucking matters without you here.” He softly, tenderly moved you from your position on the floor to not disturb your wounds. He sat you up, cradling you against his broad chest and openly sobbed for you.
“When you get better,” he growled into your shoulder, “I will repay you for this. I will pay my debt to you.” His sobs got more desperate, not halting in the slightest when Trafalgar D Water-Law approached the two of you in your embrace.
“Let me get ‘em to the infirmary,” Law offered, gesturing for Bepo to ready the aid kit, “I’ll treat the wounds there-.”
“-I won’t leave them,” Zoro barked over your shoulder, your soft smile tugging at your cheeks in your hazy daze. “Let me go with you, Traffy. I won’t say a damn word to distract you, on my honor.” Law nods, raising his hand and spreading his fingers and offers the two words to switch positions within the infirmary: “Room, Shambles.”
As you drifted in and out of consciousness, you laughed each time Zoro chastised you for your stupidity. Echos of: “There were so many other things you could’ve done instead,” and “You stumbled into that blade like a moron and took that hit for me, idiot.” You giggled through the pain, barely feeling it as Law worked to stitch you together again.
Upon regaining consciousness, you looked to your moss-haired crewmate and offered out your hand to his bicep. His head was bowed, arms crossed over his chest, and was assumed to be napping by your bedside. Feeling your touch, he was roused from his sleep and immediately leaned forward to bring his face beside yours.
“You’re a fucking moron,” he huffed, smiling in a melancholy grin. You laughed at his insult, squeezing his muscle before retracting your hand. As you nearly drew it away to your side, he caught your hand and brought your palm up to his lips.
“My fucking moron,” he confirmed, placing a soft kiss to your palm before using it to cup his face. “I love you.”
Duality: Massacre Soldier Killer
Staring up into your face while remaining silent, resting his masked face on the heel of his palm, he listened to your recount of a very specific childhood injury that left you with an interesting scar on your thigh. Killer’s eyes never left your face, his cheeks beginning to glow warm and vibrant beneath the shroud of his mask.
“So, let me get this straight,” Captain Eustass Kid held his hand in front of his face and gave it a gentle wave to halt your words, “That sick-looking scar wasn’t from any time you served with Luffy, but because you set off a fucking harpoon and speared yourself in the leg with it?”
Killer felt himself swoon at the melody your laugh thrust into the atmosphere. He was ever thankful his blue and white mask disguised how much he was smiling beneath the shroud.
“Yep,” you popped the ‘P’ afterwards, nodding in confirmation as you sat beside Usopp and drew your tankard up to your lips, “But I learnt from it, and it hasn’t happened since.” Killer sighed, his voice almost coming out in a soft moan to reveal his growing infatuation for you. Kid barked out a harsh gaggle of laughter, clapping you on the shoulder with his right hand and gestured for you to reveal it to them.
“Let me see it again, go on,” he chuckled, removing his hand and sitting back on his seat, “Use Killer’s thigh as a prop so we can see it properly. You don’t mind do you, big guy?” Killer absentmindedly and slowly shook his head, tapping his thigh twice with his hand for you to reveal your injury to the captain of the Victoria Punk, himself and your crewmate beside you.
“Alright,” you shrugged, standing beside Usopp and Killer and gently placed your foot atop Killer’s thigh and began hiking up your shorts to your hip, “Feast your eyes, Captain.” Sure enough, an interesting looking scar was revealed on your inner thigh, clear as day and sure as the sea is salty.
“Oh, fucking hells!” Kid gave you a hearty laugh, “You seeing this, big guy?” Kid turned his attention to his first mate, his smile only growing as he noticed the angle of Killer’s mask never left your face. Surprise was immediately thrust into Kid’s eyes, noticing the unwavering resolve in Killer’s posture.
You turned your attention down to the silent and broody first-mate, your face puzzled and eyes searching his mask for any further thought or action. He slowly drew his hands up to clasp around your ankle and calf, holding it firmly as he leaned forward.
“You’re perfect,” he offered in a breathy whisper, stroking your leg and gazing lovingly into your face, “Don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise.”
Your face flushed with a warmth at his words, eyes widening and looking down at his large hands as they held you so tenderly and delicately within his grasp. Smiling, you leaned forwards and placed your hand over his scarred left forearm with mischief in your eyes, asking him a simple question with a suggestive tone.
“Like what you see then, big guy?” At your question, Usopp nearly choked on his drink. You had never been this bold before, and this came as a shock to your crew’s skilled sniper. He covered his choking with a soft cough, turning away with a downturned smile and stifling his growing laugh.
“So much,” Killer confirmed, gently caressing your calf and looking up at you through half-hooded blonde lashes beneath his mask, “So, so much.”
#one piece#x reader#roronoa zoro#eustass kid#massacre soldier killer#one piece drabbles#gn!reader#kid x reader#zoro x reader#killer x reader#op drabbles#one piece x reader#op x reader#one piece x you#one piece fluff#ask snail#snail answers
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the way i loved you
chris sturniolo x reader
warnings: cursing
a/n: hope you likeee <333
i watched as nick pulled an array of snacks from a plastic bag, setting them on the table.
today nick, matt, chris, and i were going to be filming a video where we rate snacks from around the world.
once nick set the camera up, he did the intro and explained what we would be doing.
while nick explained where he got the food, i watched Chris pick up a small pink tin, inspecting it.
i slowly began to tune out nick’s voice, focusing on the way chris’s fingers ran across the tin.
he carefully placed the tin down, drumming his fingers along the table.
god, his fingers are so long. they’re perfect-
no! stop! you shouldn’t be thinking about your best friend’s fingers like that !
i quickly look away from his fingers, realizing i was staring.
luckily, he didn’t seem to notice.
as nick continued to explain the concept of the video, i watched as chris began to smile.
i love how excited he is, he’s adorable.
as i smiled at his eagerness, he happened to look at me, catching my gaze as we smiled at each other.
once nick finished explaining, we decided to try the sour candy in the pink tin first.
i watched as chris attempted to take the plastic wrapping around the tin off, but was unsuccessful.
he fumbled with the plastic, and it seemed like he couldn’t keep his hands still. he almost seemed, nervous ?
he turned to me with a bashful smile on his face, “can you open it, please?”
“yeah, i got you” i said as i grabbed it from his hands, removing the plastic wrapping and handing it back to him.
“this one has vitamin c, which one’s that?” he looked at me, expectantly.
“why would i know ?” i asked, furrowing my brows.
“i don’t know, you’re the smart one” he mumbled.
“shut up” i laughed as i shook my head , “you’re smart too” .
we all tried one, and agreed that they weren’t actually sour, despite the tin having the word sour across it in big letters.
“doesn’t it feel like you have to put a lot of effort into getting that grape flavor ?” nick pointed out.
he scrunched his face up, making us all laugh, as chris put his hand on my shoulder, leaning onto me as he laughed.
i love hearing him laugh.
we gave it a rating, and moved onto the next candy.
once we realized they were slide whistles, we all started busting out laughing.
we all started fooling around, laughing at each other’s shenanigans.
chris wrapped his arms around my waist, laughing into my shoulder. the sound of his laugh, made me laugh even harder.
as we continued to try and rank the snacks, chris grew more and more touchy.
not that i’m complaining.
there were many times where i would catch him staring at me and vice versa. he made it so easy to enjoy his presence.
once we finished our last snack and agreed on the final ranking of everything, nick closed out the video and turned off the camera.
i turned to chris. “that was fun” i said trying to fight the shit-eating grin that was forming on my face.
“i agree” he said, returning the smile.
“jesus christ” matt spoke up from behind us, rolling his eyes and walking away.
“what ?” we called out.
A FEW DAYS LATER
nick, chris, and i were hanging out in the living room.
i was scrolling on tik tok, occasionally showing them videos that i found funny.
as i continued to scroll, i came across one video in particular that made my heart begin to race.
the lyrics of The Way I Loved You by Taylor Swift filled the room.
what the actual fuck.
and he says, you look beautiful tonight. and i feel perfectly fine. but i miss…
clips of chris and i staring at each other fill the screen.
screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain and it’s 2 am and i’m cursing your name
chris holding onto my waist, hugging me, leaning on me
so in love that you act insane, and that’s the way i loved you
us laughing together, looks of pure joy on our faces.
i glance to my right, seeing chris already staring down at my phone.
fuck. what do i do ? what do i say ?
suddenly, nick yells “oh my god is that the ship edit of you and chris ? that shit’s blowing up !” he said.
“damn, nick. how’d you know ?”
“i reposted it”
“WHAT?” chris and i stared at him like he had five heads.
“well, it was good. and c’mon, doesn’t take a genius to realize y’all like each other” he said, nonchalantly.
“i’m going to the bathroom” he said, walking off.
i’m literally losing my mind. a ship edit ? a TAYLOR ship edit ? we’re never beating the dating allegations.
“well, what do the comments say?” chris asked, his voice shaking the slightest bit.
i glanced over at him, before opening the comments.
sturniolowhore
awww they’re adorable
blueeyedbesson
they’d look so good tg
abbie13sworld
they’re literally in love no one can convince me otherwise
mommysturns
i literally love them tg 💗
babydollfae22
they need to stop playing and get tg
mbbsgf
them + taylor makes me so happy
“damn. they kinda love us together” i said. i scrolled, expecting to move onto something else.
suddenly, Tattoo by Loreen came on. this edit had clips of chris and i from the recent video and over the years.
it’s like we’re watching a progression of our relationship over the past few years.
every wandering eye, stolen glance, smile that was a little too wide, touch, hug that lasted a little too long, the fans always noticed them.
it was literally right in front of our faces the entire time.
listening to the sound of violins swelling while watching chris and i’s interactions almost made me want to cry.
i turned to chris, who was already staring at me.
he looked down at my lips. “what do the comments say?” he asked.
i turned back to my phone, opening them up.
sophssturn
they’re literally perfect for each other
xhiejfy
how adorableeee
bernardenjoyer
they’re cute ig but me and jimmy would be cuter
queen161718
literally just watched them fall in love with each other
vib3swithanuk
they’re good for each other
fr3sh-love
so so happy for them
“they think that we’d be good together” i told him.
“i think i agree with them” he whispered.
“then maybe you should ask me out” i said, my gaze shifting from his eyes to his lips.
our noses touched. “will you go out with me ?”
i smiled, “hell yeah” i whispered before pushing my lips onto his.
—————-
y’all see any familiar names ? 🤨
i love y’all <333
masterlist
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so, someone called cersei a white feminist on one of my posts (not putting them on blast, don't seek them out), and i feel compelled to point out that contemporary comparisons like this don't always work well.
westeros is a pseudo medieval world with no history of a feminist movement and where all women are systemically barred from possessing political authority in their own right. power is derived from their male relations, specifically fathers and husbands. see, the way catelyn has to rally the men in her father's name when she tries to arrest tyrion in agot. in such a world, when characters like cersei and rhaenyra desire to gain the same social and legal benefits afforded to men, to denigrate their efforts right out of hand (which is often what labels such as 'girlboss' and 'white feminist' are accomplishing), is on some level, refusing to engage the premise.
i don't feel it's insightful to call these characters white feminists because their political reality is very different from ours. this doesn't even work as a criticism of the way they're written by the author, because the text certainly isn't neglecting racial and class issues in order to simply tell a story centred around the personal empowerment of two highly privileged women. they are both royalty who still enjoy power derived from an unjust feudal hierarchy, power which they have exercised to maintain their positions in said hierarchy. but at the same time, the desire for meaningful participation in the politics of the realm is not being condemned. nowhere is the implication that they shouldn't have tried to resist their socially ordained marginalisation at all. and we know the feudal patriarchy of westeros won't allow a woman to possess political power in her own right without the constant threat of hegemonic violence. this is the tragedy of both characters. westeros doesn't respect their authority and in order to command that respect they must go to war, but their support of patriarchal institutions and methods of violence eventually makes them tyrants. and the miserable end that rhaenyra meets (one that cersei will likely share) is critiquing both the hegemonic violence required to ascend and keep hold of the iron throne and the misogyny inherent in the system.
asoiaf is historical fantasy, the thing about stories set in the past is that you're being invited to consider a world with different models than ours. not everything is going to have a 1:1 contemporary equivalent, especially not in a fantasy series. and when readers try to force comparisons anyway, they ignore the actual social systems that influence and explain the motivations of these characters, and also often end up creating dishonest, far less sympathetic versions of them (see, alicent being seriously labelled a tradwife). and finally, these characters are narrative tools in service to the story. cersei and rhaenyra are not a moral lesson in the "right" or "wrong" way to resist gendered oppression, but simply one aspect of asoiaf's exploration of women navigating power in westeros. catelyn and alicent are another.
#this was just meant to be a cersei post but then i remembered this is how people talk about all women vying for power in asoiaf#just. that comment felt like it was invalidating cersei's entire story out of hand and um. that's not how you're supposed to read it?#she's a sympathetic character you're being asked to sympathise with her while recognising the very real ways in which she is hurting people#when will i make a post without an embarrassing typo. why did it say ASSENT instead of ASCEND.#valyrianscrolls#*[🫀]#asoiaf
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The fact that radfems spread this post around is actually really interesting--infuriating, but interesting. Because what they've really done here is tell on themselves.
This is the shrimp guy story:
From an anonymous green text called "shrimp saved my life" [emphasis mine]:
>be depressed, suicidal xanax- addicted incel >one day I go to my /aq/fag uncle's house for some shit >he has pet shrimp, never seen anything like it before >he offers to get me some 53 KB JPG >throw them in a barely cycled tank with some shitty rock >several shrimp die >realize that I killed them with my apathy >realize I need to take responsibility for once in my life >do research, learn about water parameters and so on >eventually I have a beautiful planted tank with no more deaths >notice a female shrimp carrying eggs >haven't felt this excited about anything in almost a decade >the eggs disappear and I once again think I fucked up >a few days later I see a tiny transparent baby shrimp >l suddenly know how the shepherds felt as they gazed upon the newborn Christ >by this point I live and breathe shrimp >all my spare time is spent on shrimp research and watching shrimp videos >l spend most of the money I had saved from my last job on shrimp products >quit the Xanax to support shrimp spending >start putting effort into college in hope of getting a good job for my shrimp >grades improve, no longer facing the prospect of dropping out >relationship with parents improves since I am finally passionate about something and applying myself >l see genuine happiness in their eyes when I talk excitedly about my shrimp >for my birthday my mom makes me a shrimp cake >it even has fondant legs and little chocolate eggs >cry like a little bitch when I see it >mom hugs me and tells me she's always been proud of me >college dorm neighbours demand to see my shrimp >shit they're gonna think I'm autistic >they actually think my shrimp are really cool >they start inviting me to their social events >start interacting with girls, get told by girls for the first time in my life that I'm fun and smart >l think my shrimp would be proud of me if they knew >We're gonna make it bros. Even if you can't do it for yourself, do it for the animals that depend on you.
He did address his relationship with women. By finding a hobby and passion and working on himself--"touching grass"--he stepped away from the echo chamber that filled him with all this rage and convinced him women were to blame for all of his problems. As someone once wisely observed, "the cure is going offline and realizing it's just. really not that big a deal."
And that is what radfems have not done, so of course they didn't spot the quiet flashpoint of shrimp guy's personal development within his story.
Edit: it's been brought to my attention that the version of the greentext post I lifted the text from was censored by someone else. My bad for not realizing that, tbh it was done so well I thought shrimp guy had done it himself, but that's an important part of the post. I've gone back through and un-censored it. The reply which was spread around with the original post addressed the words themselves well, I think; however distasteful and fucked up the incel rabbit hole is, it doesn't diminish his growth.
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Heroes of the Dragon Age
An animation I've made for Dragon Age Day 2023, featuring my main Warden (Alyssa Cousland-Theirin), Hawke (Eleena Amell Hawke) and Inquisitor (Sulevin Lavellan)!
It's to this day one of my best artwork and I thought I should share it here too! 90+ hours between the original sketch, outfit design, the rough animation, rotoscope, inking, flat-colours, background shading and even the audio :')
Interested in the process? I detailed it below since it was my first time doing something like that:
I would like to start by saying I'm not a professional animator!Everything you've seen here is the result of experimentation and a lot of practice to learn and understand how 2D animation works.
My first idea started in May 2023. I just finished rewatching DA Absolution for the X time, and wanted to analyse why I loved the intro so much. (Even after countless rewatch, I never skipped it once.) I was inspired to study it with my main three protagonists!
Then came the first test with Alyssa Cousland-Theirin, my Hero of Ferelden! I tried to understand which part to separate for the animation. Mainly the hair and cape because it flows a lot more than the rest! If I recall, my first idea here was to make her counter flame attacks (?). Then, as the camera turns around her, I tried to add a grid to know how the camera would work around it.
I ended up making the clip longer, so she could position herself to the further left and leave space to the two other protagonists.
Now it was time to try to animate Sulevin Lavellan, my Inquisitor. I really kept that quick doodling style just to capture the vibe without putting too much time/effort into it! The background would be static to contrast with Alyssa's. I also loved the idea of a rogue sneaking!
Instead of working on Eleena Amell Hawke, my Champion of Kirkwall, I went back to Alyssa and started working with Clip Studio Paint 3D models (this entire animation has been done on the EX version of the software!) It helped for rotoscope animation and maintaining likeness! That's when I got the idea to make the background swirl around the character to let the eyes be guided by the rest of the screen!
After a couple more hours, I planned the entire animatic with 3D models and quick doodles! I finally found a cool pose for Eleena Hawke, which was honestly the hardest of the three to imagine for some reason? I tried many other poses but ended up picking an animation from the game!
This whole time, I was studying a bunch of background ideas and how studio Red Dog Culture House (who made Absolution) work! Thankfully, they have a YouTube Channel where they shared some BTS content so I could analyse it!
Then, I simplified my character and their original designs in the style of the studio! These outfits are how I imagine them after Trespasser. Alyssa as the Queen of Ferelden, looking for a cure to the Calling, Hawke following Fenris to Tevinter & Sully as a Red Jenny Inquisitor!
The idea for Sulevin's animation actually came from a piece I doodled on a live stream, when I was drawing pose studies and turning them into finished artworks haha As for Alyssa, I wanted to draw the fight that got her facial scars!
Once their designs were ready and the background ideas too, I made the rough version of the animation! Basically a sketch done on top of the 3D models to add the details, staying pretty rough just to capture the idea and movements.
Then it was time to start the lines! I decided make a folder per frame, so I could separate all he main elements and draw them one by one. It helps keeping the likeness of a character in the different frames without having big "jumps" between frames! In fact, every parts were coloured differently to recognize them, and then I used vector erasers and masks (Ah yes, the entire lineart is done in vectors of course! It's easier to adjust and save time when working on similar frames!)
At first of course, everything overlaps! But I find it easier to draw too much and erase after, just to make sure everything is coherent in each frames! The cool thing about CSP is how you can change the colour of the layers in one click! So all the coloured lines turned into black in one second, and I could reverse it just as quickly to double check!
Then I started working on Sulevin! I made a blue line to mark where her feet were, as the sketch in the background wasn't perfectly straight! (Like Sulevin's sexuality 🤭😂) The silhouettes were very quick to do, but I had fun adding more & more details as she came closer to the foreground!
I really wanted to add that little dagger trick, but I remember it required me to change the pacing of Eleena's apparition, as it was recovering her arm too quickly! I had to change the pace of multiple frames quite a lot during the project, to make sure the flow was right! For Eleena, most of her animation remained around her arms and the staff itself, as magic would be the most difficult part! That way each character has their own focus: Alyssa has a very animated background, Sulevin got the grappling hook and Eleena the ice!
Then it was time to start adding colours! Just like for the lineart, I separated every colour on it's own layer, so I could easily adjust the colours later if needed. I added one colour at the time, going through all the frames, and then another colour!
I made full palette tests with the colours I would use for their background at this point, checking if the details remained readable! Alyssa was the most challenging in terms of clothes, because I made her a very detailled armour! I had to simplify the Theirin heraldry, vectorize/redraw the Cousland, and make a brush for her cape's pattern!
Once I was done adding the flatcolours, I started the background, and oh boy it was a wild ride. For the cave, I painted multiple tests. I imagine was to use CSP panorama tools, which transform a texture into a 3D sphere, so each corners must match to look good. Sadly, it made the background very blurry, so after hours of testing, I changed ideas. Instead of the random fire balls (?) I originally imagined for Alyssa, I made three simple frames of a Rage Demon to attack her.
I ended up using the cave as a repeated pattern to make it turn 360° around the character. For Eleena, I mixed inspiration from the comics, Dreadwolf & Absolution, using warm colours matching Hawke's signature red. Just like I made the cave very grey/blue to match Grey Wardens. For Val Royeaux, it was more complex because I wanted to make it green, matching the Inquisitor's signature green. But bright green couldn't work, and the original colour during day time was blue/white/gold. So I added more leaves, played around the design a bit! After adding the rage demon, I made the shading! It was surprisingly easy and quick to do now!
I clipped a white layer on the flatcolours to not be distracted by the colours, and made thin lines to separate the light/shadows, then simply filled everything with the bucket tool! Then you set the layer to multiply and remove the white layer, and you have celshading shadows! Now the character looks out of the picture, so I added layers of blue in color burn, saturation and substract blending modes to make her look like she's in the right setting! Of course, I did the same with the other two, giving Hawke a red overlay and Sulevin green shadows!
Then I added the details, it went from white irises, to sword/staff smears to earrings and smaller finition that goes on top of these layers. To add the lights, I simply selected the shadows and reversed the selection! Using warm and cold tones to create contrast with the purple/bluish shadows! I also added more ambient light layers for Alyssa to reflect the Rage Demon fire. Now it was time to add ice magic! My first attempt had too many frames, making it look weird! Sometimes it's better to lower the frame rate to make things less bumpy!
Then I downloaded some cool ice brushes on CSP assets that made it look less like blue magical flames! But when I covered the screen in ice, I realized "Oh wait, I could make a cool transition from the ice, to blue lyrium turning red?"Red Lyrium truly links these three games and The Veilguard somehow! I spent the next hour painting over the idol and putting it in a black background, with lyrium and then the golden Dragon Age title text.
For the SFX, I used free youtube libraries sounds & "Darkspawn!" comes from the violent human female voice set (iconic for ""Can I get you a ladder? So you can get off my back!"😂🤭) After editing all that, the animation was finally done!
Here's the final math:
About 15 hours for the sketching/rough/animatic phase, 30h for the lineart, 25h for colours, 10h for backgrounds, 5h for details & 5h for music & SFX, for a total of 90 hours. Aka the same amount of time it took me to finish Baldur's Gate 3 the first time lol
If you have any question regarding the animation or the softwares etc. do not hesitate to ask, I'll do my best to answer!
#dragon age#dragon age origins#dao#dragon age 2#da2#dragon age inquisition#dai#da4#dragon age dreadwolf#dragon age the veilguard#animation 2d#original character#tutorial#warden#grey warden#warden cousland#alistair x cousland#alistair x warden#ferelden#hero of ferelden#queen of ferelden#hawke#fem hawke#eleena amell hawke#mage#warrior#rogue#lavellan#inquisitor lavellan#solavellan
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One Year HRT
On September 19, 2023, I took my first dose of estrogen. It was a last resort. A desperate hope. One last shot in the dark before just giving up on feeling actual happiness in my life.
17 months I spent chasing down HRT in the hopes that it could fix me, could fill the hole in my heart, could deliver on all the wondrous, amazing, incredible promises that I'd heard from transwomen across social media.
…The legends were true.
It doesn't feel like I'm living my life lost in a dark forest anymore. I'm not afraid of everything everywhere all the time anymore. I can feel things now, as if I've spent my life running the free trial of Emotions and I finally upgraded to the full version. My mental capacity to hold the grief and frustration of the people I care about has gone off the scale, and as a result I actually feel like I can be there when they need me.
And something I long thought impossible has happened.
I've been making new friends.
More mental capacity means more effort put into writing and art and creativity, and more capability to reach out and be social. More creativity and social effort means people are beginning to notice me. Someone I have a whole lot of respect for as a person and as an artist told me that she can't wait for me to be on the radar of the greater trans community, because I'm already on the radar of the trans artist community. Someone else I have a lot of respect for told me I have the makings of someone a lot of people will look up to. I've hung out on voice chat as friends with people I thought I'd only ever quietly admire from afar.
When I started medically transitioning, my big impossible dream became "What if I find my people? What if I become part of a real community? What if I can be a guiding light for my transgender siblings, and help them out of the same darkness I once spent my life in?"
…It doesn't seem so impossible anymore.
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