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tea-cat-arts · 4 months

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Shen Yuan getting transported into pidw isn't "the system punishing him for being a lazy internet hater," but instead representative of "step 1 of the creative process: getting so mad at something you decide to go write your own fucking book" in this essay I will

#svsss #scum villian self saving system #shen qingqiu #shen yuan #the fact that people think scum villain #-a series that examines and criticizes common tropes in fiction-#is somehow against criticism or being a little hater is wild to me #especially since shen qingqiu never gets punished for being a hater #heck- he's still a little hater by the end of the series #he mostly gets punished for treating life like a play and like he and the people around him are characters #(or in other words- he suffers for denying his own wants and emotions and his own sense of empathy)#I think some of y'all underestimate how much writing/art is inspired by creaters being little haters #like example off the top of my head-#the author of Iron Widow has been pretty vocal about the book being inspired by their hatred of Darling in the Franxx #I think my interpretation of Shen Yuan's transmigration is also supported by the fact that this series is an examines writing processes #side note- though i understand why people say Shen Yuan is lazy and think its a valid take it still doesnt sit right with me #i am probably biased because my own experiences with chronic pain and depression and isolation #but ya- i dont think Shen Yuan is lazy so much as he is deeply lonely and feels purposeless after denying parts of himself for 20ish years #like yall remember the online fandom boom from covid right?#being stuck completely alone in bed while feeling like shit for 20 days straight does shit to your brain #the fact that no one came to check on him + he wasn't exactly upset about leaving anyone behind supports the isolation interpretation too #+in the skinner demon arc he describes his life of being a faker/inability to stop being a faker now that he's Shen Qingqiu #as “so bland he's tempted to throw salt on himself” and “all he could do is lay around and wait for death” (<-paraphrasing)#bro wants to be doing stuff but is stuck in paralysis from repeatedly following scrips made by other people #another point on “Shen Yuan isn’t lazy” is just the sheer amount of studying that man does #also he did graduate college- how lazy can he really be #he doesnt know what hes doing but he at least tries to actively train his students #and he actually works on improving his own cultivation + spends quite a bit of time preping the mushroom body thing #+he's experiencing bouts of debilitating chronic pain throughout all this #but ya tldr: Shen Yuan's transmigration is an encouragement to write and not a punishment and also i dont think its fair to call him lazy

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waterghostype · 5 months

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was assigned to do art for school based on the color green so of course i chose the green ninja (accompanied by long xiaojiao)

#ninjago #lego ninjago #monkie kid #lmk #lego monkie kid #mei dragon #lmk mei #mei lmk #lloyd garmadon #ninjago lloyd #aphid artisms #aphid ninjamonkies #finally…art #this was originally smthn else entirely but i hated that ver so much that i restarted and finished it in like 1 day #im pretty proud of this though i realize that i need to do more color/lighting studies #lloyd taking a nap with his oomf #they would be totally friends like 1 day with mei and mk could fix all of lloyd’s problems #steps 1 foot inside the arcade and the light returns to his eyes #this was also heavily referenced from a pose i found online kibbitzer i think is the name #idk if im even allowed to post this but ill jjst priv it if needed #yayyyy lloyd gardon #yayyyy mei dracon #i wish i couldve also incorporated tmnt into this but i was rushing #im still super learning bt how to draw and light environments and all erps

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megpricephotography · 3 months

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Beach Boy! Barney, jumping for joy during a trip to the beach in July of 2012.

#I don't usually post politics stuff online - even in the tags!#BUT I am currently in a state of massive relief after seeing the exit polls for our General Election in the UK today #This happy pic seemed an appropriate one to post in light of it looking as though the Tories will be out by morning!#I mean... I won't fully believe & celebrate until the *actual* results are in but the exit poll is usually pretty bang on... so YAY!#Prediction is that we will have a landslide victory for Labour - even if it's a bit wrong it looks like Labour *should* win easily #I don't massively like the current Labour party but I loathe the Conservatives & what they've done over the past 14yrs #Where I live the Tories are still actually likely to win (ick!) unless the Green Party pull off something amazing #but I don't even care about our local result much - I just want Labour to win overall & it looks like they will #Oh! Happy Independence Day to our friends across the pond!!#We will all be keeping our fingers crossed for your upcoming election results later in the year!#throwback thursday #barney #border collie #beach

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otiksimr · 7 months

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Wanting to post fanart of a thing a like but also I do not want to be torn to shreds by the people who dislike the thing.

#Man I love becoming a fan of a show only to go online and see literally everyone hating on it #it does so much for the mental health #Genuinely pretty scary the things I've seen that have happened to people like- my goodness #I get not liking a show but leave the fans alone my god.#I don't care if 'they're cringe' or 'annoying' that's not a justifiable reason for harassment and hate #And I mean like the average fan not the uh... [those] ones #Also I don't want people to praise my stuff while bashing on the og that's just-#ew.#I say this and yet hate on TNR all the time lmao #that's different #TNR was actually just a half-assed cash grab #<- but also I could care less if someone was a fan of it like- you do you buddy #anyways #just wanted to rant for a moment #Good day to you :)#Kos speaks

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ihopeucomehomesoon · 8 months

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i won’t hold people to the same standards i have on myself in terms of friendship bc everyone shows they care in different ways

#this is a part affirmation and part intro to a rant i need to unleash #but i’ll leave it in the tags here bc it feels safer lol #it’s abt my housemate the other day when we had our last class which is online but our previous classes were in person so as a class we #usually just pull it up on the main computer and broadcast the zoom in the classroom #but on this day the class before this zoom class got out early so lots of people went home early to just watch it on their own zoom or wtvr #so the row i sit in was pretty empty except for me my housemate and our two friends #and usually my housemate sits on my right but she got up and moved to sit on the other side next to our other friend and said nothing #and i didn’t want to say anything bc i was kinda sad/offended even though #her moving seats probably has nothing to do with me and much rather her personal preference i can’t help but think negatively abt myself #also one morning we were both off she went to the smoothie shop and coffee shop and just went to pick up her orders and i felt the same #reaction of like sad/offended bc she didn’t consider me at al like what if i wanted a smoothie too! TF #or coffee even though i don’t drink coffee anymore wtvr #my thoughts on her and my friendship are kinda rocky bc we feel so out of sync #i feel like she’s always in her own world and it’s hard to get through to her and become real friends #it’s whatever not all friendships can be deep and meaningful

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chiimeramanticore · 4 days

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#im not dead quit asking #I'm just really really really not doing well #sorry if i scared anyone. that wasnt my intent #things got. let's say worse. for me irl. more complicated for sure #i hate to publicize my breakdown I really do. but maybe i... need this? in a weird way?#i haven't really been adjusting well to having a platform online. that's not anyone's fault but mine ofc #i feel that my 'fans' (if ive earned the right to call them that) dont and frankly cant ever care for me as a person #i dont know you and you dont know me. you dont know all of me at least. just what i make public. what i allow others to see #i had it kinda bullied into me that i need to keep my mouth shut abt my own issues. and ive spent a lot of this year trying to unlearn that #maybe publicizing this is a bad idea anyway #I just know ive been more honest abt my emotions and my personal life with my friends and my partner #and not everyone enjoys it but i know I'm not like. traumadumping so i feel somewhat assured that anyone who doesnt wanna hear abt my life-#-probably wasnt all that interested in forming a close relationship w me to begin with. even if theyre friendly at first #everyone else; the people who I know care about me; have shown me that through their actions #my point is being honest abt how youre doing w other ppl is a good idea. revolutionary i know lol #and i still don't know a lot of you personally but #parasocial or not i got some very genuine sounding messages while I was gone. and i. feel really bad that i worried those people #I guess theres my proof that people would care if i disappeared suddenly. people would notice pretty quick it seems #im never gonna kms btw. even if i didnt have the support i have im simply too stubborn to die lol. to put it lightly #and to those who thought this was abt fandom drama: it's not. those who shall not be named are genuinely the least of my problems these days #I'm on a journey of self actualization. or something. im trying to get my shit together. im trying to stop being clinically depressed lol #but god keeps throwing wrenches in my plans and. i beat myself up about it too much #but that's just life. they say you make a plan and god laughs #im. trying to be okay with just riding the wave. im impatient but if i keep trying to somehow speed up time im just gonna exhaust myself #which I think is where im at now. burnt out #and on top of all that i still feel this need to like. perform for you guys #if i dont keep making content everyone will forget i exist. if i dont make another video essay this year can i even call myself a youtuber #etc etc. its the spiral its impostor syndrome we've all been there #im trying to end this on a positive note but idk. i dont have all the answers yet #hoping i figure it out soon. i hope you dont forget me in the meantime

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steakout-05 · 2 months

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purple woman alert!!!!!!

i drew this neat little drawing of Miss Pauling yesterday and like... i literally have not drawn her in years. i think the last time i drew her was back around 2019 and then even earlier back in 2018 for an old Inktober thing i did. it has been very long since i last drew her.

tired gay real

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #miss pauling #miss pauling tf2 #i need to draw her more she's actually quite fun to draw!!#especially considering i haven't drawn her a lot #there's a few tf2 characters i haven't drawn in years #sniper and pyro and spy and olivia and saxton and cheavy..... haven't drawn them in ages #a few i haven't drawn at all.....#i really gotta get on my drawing tf2 game again #also those old drawings i mentioned? i might post some of those one day because they're not online anymore #they were made back when i used to be on amino and i've since deleted my old account which i partly regret because it resulted in some-#-media becoming entirely lost #and unfortunately some of that media includes a few of my old drawings :(#not a lot of them are lost fortunately #but a few of them are and i have pretty much no chance of recovering them unless someone downloaded them or they were auto backed up #which i doubt ended up happening #i have a goldmine of old stuff to possibly share one day

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penisbilt · 5 months

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the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now

#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL #really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us #ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great #extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore #the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog #its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow #i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating #i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one #i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it #theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget #anyway. anyway.#our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by #there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!'#we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad #cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now #maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that #im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away #ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free #i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20 #i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her #but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more #maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know #because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before #i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years #i dunno. i dont know #anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process #the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months #the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time #when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move #just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend

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nururu · 11 months

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Don't do a thinkpiece on skypiea if you're going to completely ignore white christian settler colonization and indigenous genocide. Just don't talk about it.

#its so wild how smart ppl who watch one piece are #yall can write theories all day long and im like wow yall are so smart #but when it comes to skypiea you go braindead #i do not believe youre that stupid #that you dont recognize it #i genuinely just think youre anti indigenous #and dont want to recognize anything doing with indigenous genocide bc you benefit so much from it #ive been looking online for anything that has an intelligent take on skypiea and i havent found much #ppl comparing it to palestine #which is fair #but imo wano represents that situation a lot better #its pretty obvious skypiea is commentary on the indigenous genocide of north america #i think you guys forget that #by tens of millions #and hundreds of years #thats the biggest and longest lasting genocide in human history #nothing in history comes anywhere close to what was done to indignenous north americans #i know yall dont care and dont take it seriously #but odas not a fucking brain dead dumb ass bitch #obviously hed make one of the most important arcs in the series revolve around a significant real world event #its even the way that he went out of his way to show that the indigenous ppl are somewhat sovereign #but theyre STILL being targeted by the white ppl and controlled by white christian colonization

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eternal-reverie · 5 months

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got the posting anxiety bad tonight

#click clack #ok a peak into my thought process and anxiety here we go #ok so the art is almost done and up to standard I would post onto my art blog #BUT for some reason the thought of posting art of my ocs there scares me #because even tho it’s my art blog in my mind it’s the equivalent to a art gallery that demands being detached????? from the art #like once I share it there it’s no longer ‘mine’ but to the public #and my ocs (plus the stories that go with them) are like the closest to my heart and relinquishing them feels like a lot #a part of my imagination that I spent so much time with developing over the years to be placed up for judgement…#so then the solution could be to put it here on my personal! the online space cozy enough and filled with other posts that could easily bury #the original posts I put here #but there goes my other dilemma. i don’t want them too associated with my personal for if one day i do muster up something for publication #my big fear is that ppl will find this space and go thru everything. the fear of being perceived and judged 😵‍💫#all the hypotheticals and anxiety for something that may not even happen #dumb mind problems my head made up 🙄#anyway writing it out helped lol I’m posting it to my art blog I decided 👍#I have to work on getting that blog to be comfortable space to post… i should lower that silly self imposed standard I set for myself #and be whatever about ppl being aware of my online presences #maybe… [grinding my teeth] I should post my messy sketches onto my art blog…#I should take my friends suggestion and make a website to feature my ocs…🤔#idk my only other solution that doesn’t feel viable to mitigate the anxiety is to slowly introduce my ocs in the background of setting art #just a slow drip until they are in the forefront #bleghhh whatever much ado about nothing it’s like I never posted my ocs ever when I have indeed posted them before on both places ( º＿º )#I’m realizing it happens too when I post too much fanart in a row… I have curator disease??? 🫨#or something I used to be very particular about what order I reblog stuff like it used to be by color and content balanced out #I still do to a lesser degree… but it used to be pretty bad #post order compulsion????#the fear of being abrupt and incohesive in between posts…#if you read this far thanks you can now see how much this consumes me 🙃

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lunetual · 2 years

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KIHYUN ✧ ‘WHERE IS THIS LOVE’ Special Clip

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dandyshucks · 1 month

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also I got rly scared abt this last night or the night before because I suddenly realized sometimes people interpret it this way,,

so i just wanted to say that the reason i dont interact w people very much is NOT bc i think im better than ppl or anything - i am just very genuinely Petrified of messing up in social situations, to the point that I end up isolating and avoiding rather than risk making mistakes ^^;; WHICH ISN'T HEALTHY but . i havent figured out how to work through this yet dhdjdkl

BUT YEAH i just wanted to try to make sure nobody is thinking I'm some hoity-toity goober, I am literally just Extremely Terrified fjdjdkdl

#I've had nothing but good exps w ppl online for MONTHS but it hasnt seemed to improve my fear :')))#idk why im so scared honestly fhkddl i didnt use to be this ridiculously terrified ??#i could probably trace it back to a couple genuinely somewhat traumatizing bad interactions BUT CMONNN BRAIN !!!#its literally just a handful of Really Bad exps and all the rest have been totally fine 😭😭 those were OUTLIERS !!!#regardless. i rly hope i dont come off that way of being like. ''im too good for u'' bc thats absolutely not whats going on dhdkdl #im just. very very scared pretty much constantly and dont want to make any mistakes #bc i rly cherish this space and i am so grateful for everyone in it so i dont want to mess it up for myself i guess fhdkdl #any time i send a DM or reply or ask just know im probably fighting back Genuine Fear as i do so LMAO its so ridiculous honestly 😭😭#one day I'll figure it out and be able to interact w others without feeling like i am jumping straight into a lion's mouth !!!! one day !!!#(also theres a whole thing of me feeling like im scum of the earth and i don't want to make ppl have to be around me bc that would be rude)#(but the Fear is the main thing djdkdl the self-loathing is secondary at this point which... is potentially progress? maybe?)#(plus i am a notorious rambler. see example A (this right here). and i dont want to talk ppls ears off 😭😭)#dandy.cmd

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stargazerdaisy · 9 months

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Muz has Covid. On the literal anniversary of having it last year. The older two kids are symptomatic and presumed positive, even though they tested negative. Tonight, Ducky has an orchestra concert. And I am once again flying solo just before Christmas. I DO NOT LIKE THIS REPEAT OF LAST YEAR, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

#personal #daisy whines #i am getting past wanting to cry and now I am just mad #trying to balance all the things we're supposed to be doing this week with the uncertainty of if Ducky and I will get sick #oh and Muz is supposed to have a medical procedure next week #as long as his symptoms have improved he'll be out of isolation by then #but mothertrucker i don't want to sleep in the living room for days again #i hate that #I like my bed #and we need to so so much Christmas shopping still #i mean - it's pretty much all going to be online #but it's harder to coordinate when we're in different rooms

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frutavel · 3 months

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Sometimes I feel an urge to apologize to everyone who I interacted with in any way around like. 2020 and before then.

#part of it was me being young and very eager to talk to people and belong in a community but also no doubt very awkward about it all #to this day i don't know what is proper etiquette when talking to people online but i'm pretty sure i'm much better at it now #the other part is that during 2019-2020 i was stuck with a very toxic friendship that made all my anxieties much worse #and i worry that might have come accross in the way i talked to people #so again if we ever talked before then and i was weird. i am so sorey

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caladamn · 3 months

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reading ur asks and answers you're so real . now give us your planymphia theory sister 🙏

IM SORRY i'm clinically insane about them. i can't speak those things in public, the world is not ready.

they (p+n) make me go through hell and back. especially the last few days (I'm looking at you, p).

and now with this nymphia interview I felt my bubble was bursting. but now these stories (!!!!) they are posting. I don't even know what to think anymore (I do know, but I don't know how to phrase it in a way that makes sense). so many thoughts. so many possibilities.

one thing is true for sure: they are more insane for each other than any of us could ever be or ever imagine.

and the thing is. it doesn't make sense (to me) that they're doing it just for clout. other dr ships have done it before and some still do it (collabing and/or interacting in suggesting ways), but we're all aware they're just friends irl (rosenali and dayasco the most recent examples).

the ship wasn't even born during the season, it was born AFTER. like, everything about them is an outlier from past dr ships. their relationship (friendship or more) is different. everyone can see it.

I'm just going to say that I'm a planymphia truther at heart. I'm not delusional, I'm just enlightened.

#so many theories about their (lack of) romantic relationship #so many theories #im heavily hyperfixated so all i think about all day is them #not literally but almost #also maybe rosenali and dayasco are not the best examples since all parties involved were/are in relationships with other people #but my point is that they exploited their ships (yt vids merch tour etc)#I think pn were pretty much caught #and since theyre incapable of hiding or restraining themselves #and they are sadists who want to make us go nuts #they do the things they do online #but it's the little spontaneous moments that mean so much more #also if you're the anon that first asked about my theories--- i have them in my drafts but im too afraid to post lol #ily anon tell me YOUR theories

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what-even-is-sleep · 3 months

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Can’t wait for my drivers license to arrive so I can be driving legally again for the first time in 1.5 years!

#for legal reasons this is a joke #SO THIS IS WHATS UP #as a youngin #a young adult one might say #I was starting to learn that some systems are bullshit when I’d previously been a pretty big rule-follower #my mom showing me how to navigate the healthcare system a bit/showing me how student loans legit have practices to confuse and fuck us over #also im really bad at getting things in on time (this is an important fact)#so when I see that my drivers license is abt to expire. I’m like ‘Oup gotta get that done!’ then promptly forget abt it #next time I remember it’s 3 months expired.#I check the date and realize that wait! in a year imma be turning 21 and just one yr after that Real ID’s will become mandatory (im p sure)#so I decide to push off renewing my license! I think that the whole process will b annoying asf bc I’ve only dealt with the DMV in-person #and it SUCKED and took forever. I’m thinking that if I renew my drivers license right on/after my 21st birthday I can knock out two birds #with one stone: I can get it as a Real ID and I can get an updated picture that’s flipped sideways so getting age-checked is faster #little do i know: it’s v much illegal to be driving around with an expired license!#I drive around for a year (over a year? I don’t remember when I first realized it was expired) j having fun #then one month b4 my 21st birthday I get into an abroad study thing and have to get my passport. which I realize is also expired. and #realize that to renew my passport I have to have a valid drivers license. At this point I also realize how fucked I could be if I get pulled #over with my expired license. so I check out the process for DL renewal and rejoice! it’s online!#AND THANK FUCK I CHECKED THEN. bc if I had waited LITERALLY two more days I would not have been able to renew online and would’ve had to go #in-person. and there were no in-person appointments until after my 21st. and I learned in this process abt the fines my state applies when u #renew a DL late and ALSO that u have to entirely retake the test/redo all the paperwork shit if it’s expired for too long. I would’ve had to #retake the test n everything if I’d gone past my bday. I was also in another state for college. idk how incoherent these ramblings are but #basically I would’ve been Ultra Fucked. anyways! got that figured out #renewed the DL and had it sent to my home. then da house floods and crime goes up in the neighborhood and my DL ends up either being lost #Or tossed (with other flood-damaged things) or stolen.#I don’t realize this for 4 months bc I am silly. also in college out-of-state. also other reasons.#finally got around to calling DMV and telling them that my DL never arrived… 6 months after I renewed it!#and they were v sweet and are resending me my DL for free. so in the next few weeks I shall finally b driving legally again #!!!! the end #mypost

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