#I was so ashamed
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Birthday gift for my dear friend who loves vampires♥ . The whole thing was made in three days, I had too much fun drawing it! I created the cover drawing in the car on the way to the birthday party. So I had no time to scan it :D Well, if you enjoy reading it let me know and I will try to post more (I am making comics for my friend regularly, I am just too ashamed to translate and upload these silly things online x_x ) _____________________________________ Patreon Commissions
#original#vampires#comic#gothic horror#i guess?#i love my silly ocs#i am just so ashamed to share them#sorry
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if a character means enough to me i will truly never stop thinking about them. i just retire them into a little back room in my brain and periodically bring them out to stare at them under a little light
#tag your faves#matthew holt#not me black#black not me#levi ackerman#new addition to the list tbh but i know his ass is here to stay#hange zoe#erwin smith#their asses too#keith kogane#lance mcclain#ashamed so many voltron characters are on this list#takashi shirogane#peter parker#tony stark#harley keener#aziraphale#crowley#anthony j crowley#surprisingly?#bakugou katsuki#shouto todoroki#steve harrington#will byers#wallace wells#scott pilgrim#OMG#killua zoldyck#gon freecss#kurapika
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Truthfully it would be easier if I just isolate myself from everyone simply because after so long of just shoving things down and being told to shove things down and being told to get over it and stop being sensitive I’ve become so much more sensitive after being so unfeeling and it’s ruining everything
Not even having aventurine could fix this 😔🙏 LOLLL
#I cannot go a single day without that stomach drop feeling#for instance when someone says something vaguely allusive to another#when someone says something mean to someone else#when someone casually mentions something#that I have yearned for for so long or just genuinely really really want like it’s nothing and I’m like oh .#and the things I refer to are not material really they’re just some aspect of friendship#most of the time#Eris’ situation forced me to put a lid on me feeling this way so I can be more selfless to the struggles of others#I remember my heart just dropping when I was on the dash late at night and just seeing her talking with this one girl while she was activel#ignoring me and truthfully I got scared of myself for feeling that way because it felt sinful to be upset at something like that#I was so ashamed#but now this is daily#to me being friends doesn’t need such grand gestures I think truly the depth of things is measured the lack of hesitation to do the smalles#things#and truthfully I can do this for as many people as needed but it wouldn’t really be reciprocated#and it’s fine; me doing anything is kinda an act of charity I’m not expecting something back from someone specific#I just wish god could reward me with someone of my own is all#as the days go by I don’t even know how much more I can tolerate before things go awry#permanently#but I just get this feeling I won’t be around to find out what being normal feels like#I know life is unfair and acknowledge that I’m the first to do so#but there is no way it’s this unfair#it’s almost like knocking on a hollow object and you expect to hear some echo or reverberation but even that aspect is empty and soundless#uhhh yeah#so that’s on how I have such embarrassing and bad coping mechanisms#dora daily#because I genuinely do not feel comfort anymore with anything except a few random things and even those are constantly ruined#it’s why I can’t concentrate because I seek out those comfort activities just so I don’t panic but I get comfortable#but it’s too comfortable and doing anything apart from said things makes me panic again so I’m just stuck in a loop
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zero respect when people get all "oh nooooo i sure hope this post doesn't get a zillion noootes teehee, stop reblogging I can't have this be what people remember me for 🥺🤭" all coy and shit when the option to disable reblogs is right there. strangle that post in its crib to prove you're not a poser.
#i stand behind this so fucking hard and op was right to say it#i hope this post gets a billion notes so that all those losers see it and feel ashamed
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When I was younger I had such strange habits
My mom would make Mac n Cheese for me and I would immediately try to eat it and burn my tongue. My solution? Let it sit there forever
Once I felt that it had been long enough I would try to eat it, only for me to hate the texture of the cold Mac n Cheese (you know the one) and would refuse to eat it
My poor mom got so tired of this that she began putting ice cubes in my food. This would happen with many foods, if it was too hot for me. Soup too hot? Ice cube. Pasta too hot? Ice cube.
And it actually worked. I stopped letting it sit and get cold, because the single ice cube cooled it just enough for me to eat without complaint. Eventually I grew out of this and learned to wait
A couple friends of mine were talking about weird food they eat/ate and I brought this up and got absolutely flamed. They took me around the classroom to other groups and was continuously made fun of and still am today
#can it#i dont know how i made this such a long post#i was so ashamed#i still get this brought up to me#feel free to bully me for this
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"Bethesda/Todd Howard doesn't actually hate FNV 🙄"
They have stated the show is apparently 100% canon and they're using it to retcon the only good Fallout game to come out in decades. It wasn't even enough to ruin West Coast lore post-FNV, they're literally saying FNV never happened.
No wonder Pete Hines resigned back in October; even he thought this was stupid.
Bethesda haters stay correct. Anyone who somehow still had hope for this franchise despite the last ten years, now you can finally let go.
#i said i was only gonna make the one post but i woke up to this so. how could i not#i just wanted definitive proof that bethesda is stil ashamed after all these years on my blog#fallout show#fallout tv show#fnv#fallout prime#fonv#bethesda
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request doodles on stream in a server :D
#theyre silly :)))))#uhh ill tag this sure#chilchuck#chilchuck tims#<- i keep writing it as chilchuck times damnit#laios#laios touden#izutsumi#sure them too#and then#senshi#senshi of izganda#and thennnn...#dungeon meshi#i almost feel ashamed main tagging this when its just doodles but still AHAHAHA#not tagging chilshi cause its like. really silly fjsdjfjdsk#actually you know what nevermind i changed my mind i already tagged the others#chilshi#<- sorry you guys you gotta look at these HDSHADAHSDHS#side note senshis hair is so hard save me
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hi billford nation. can you believe this is happening?!?!?!?!?
#gravity falls#billford#stanford pines#bill cipher#ford pines#IVE BEEN HERE SINCE 2015. I DREW SO MUCH OF THEM IN MY HIGHSCHOOL SKETCHBOOKS N NEVER POSTED ANY OF IT#BC I WAS SO ASHAMED. BC BILLFORDERS USED TO HAVE IT HARDER THAN THE US MARINES#BUT WHOS LAUGHING NOWWWWW#HAHAHAHAHA#anyways idk wtf this is. take it
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tag yourself: intrepid heroes' alter emos as ppl who went to my public high school
#i'm sorry but also i couldn't not frfr#also this is NOT a reflection upon any of the real people in this show#i am most like emy lee and i am ashamed of it#literally i would be 15 minutes late to school every day then do my makeup#but the quote real? unquote emy lee was cooler than me#fhjy#d20 fhjy#dimension 20#fantasy high#fhjy shitpost#intrepid heroes#d20#fh#also murph's alter emo looks so much like one of my shit exes#sorry murph you don’t deserve how savage yours is#tbh the references are soooo early 2010s but i am proud of some of them#and if no one gets any of them all of the skin will wither from my bones#tag urself
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yeah so this was insane
#i feel like too many people reduce this interaction to jason being like ‘lol same’#but idk :/#this chapter is from jason’s pov#and leading up to it he’s like ‘people keep walking on eggshells around me bc of the the michael varus stab wound’#and he hates it so when he goes on deck to help out with the storm#everyone’s like wtf except for percy#and jason states how much he appreciated percy not treating him like a sick kid#and i feel like it’s echoed in this sentiment where jason could say so many things like#‘you should never feel that way’ ‘im here if you need anything’#but he doesn’t make percy feel alone in his desire to just…. end it all#which ik for some people that doesn’t work but you’re not a character in hoo and percy is dealing with so much guilt#and he can’t tell annabeth bc she’s a main aspect of that guilt#and he doesn’t wanna guilt her more and he feels ashamed and when he describes this he feels weird for feeling it#so having jason this tough guy be like ‘yo i understand it bc i felt the same way#that’s gotta mean a lot to percy#also insane how jason who also struggles to display vulnerability#allows it in one of few times in this moment just so percy this guy he’s supposed to be jealous about#feels comforted and not alone in his guilt and shame#and also it’s just insane how jason’s wanting to kay em ess does not get talked about AT ALL#and just seeing his mom and the pressure of new rome getting to him#like this scene is insane and i’ll never shut up about it#also ignore me i’m just finishing my reread of hoo that took all summer#jason grace#percy jackson#pjo#ashla.txt
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AU where the justice league finds out that Captain Marvel is homeless. Not Billy, they still have no idea about the captain's secret identity, but the Captain.
Maybe they were discussing a case or something, and he says something that is just a little too knowledgeable. Something only someone who has been there would know. He tries to backtrack when he realizes that he said too much, tries to explain that getting a job and an apartment is hard when you do hero work which doesn't pay (and hopes they don't find out the real reason he can't get a job is because no one will hire a kid).
The league comes to the conclusion the reason he is so secretive about his identity is because he is ashamed he is homeless. Naturally, everyone immediately feels super bad about this and tries to help him much to his dismay.
Identity shenanigans ensue.
#dc comics#dc#billy batson#captain marvel dc#shazam#the justice league#dc universe#dc captain marvel#my post#does this exist yet? If so please tell me#I feel like Clark pulls him aside and is like “hey buddy no need to be ashamed even heroes need help sometimes!”#and batman is like “....Wayne enterprise is always hiring literally anyone”#(and then because he is a little obsessed with figuring out billy's identity he keeps checking new job applicants for a match.)#Billy just wants everyone to please stop looking so closely into his secret identity
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Thinking about the fact that Mabel and Dipper didn't know they had two great uncles.
Yeah they are 12 and at 12 I had a shotty understanding of my family tree- But really? Nobody brought up their great uncle? Stanley? Especially since they'll be staying with his twin brother, Stanford?
Shermie never went to Stan's fake funeral, which to me means the twos relationship was strained on some level. If Shermie is older that means his view of Stan was poisoned in some way, that even as kids they weren't close. If the Shermie is younger then he never even got to meet Stan and all he knew about him was how he failed his family. Hell, people probably barely mentioned Stanley TO Shermie.
The fact that Stan had become a black stain upon the Pines family name makes me so vividly upset. Stanley faked his death and the family just- seemingly decided to strike him from the record. To pretend he didn't existed to spare themselves the sadness and shame.
Stanford and Shermie Pines. The only children worth mentioning of Filbrick and Caryn Pines.
It was never Stanford that was lost to the world. It was Stanley, ever since he had to leave New Jersy- it was always him that had to be struck from the record. Change his name, change his state, change his affiliations, destroy the remains of ghost that was Stanley Pines. Kill him so the family doesn't bring him up, doesn't ask questions, stops asking "Stanford" about his twin.
I just keep thinking about the fact that since the day he made one single mistake all the way up until Ford walks out of that machine- Stanley Pines was killed and did not exist. And Stan himself had no one to blame, he had to play the part in his own demise- He is the only one who ever knew Stanley was alive and has been for decades.
He lives in the multitudes of every personality he's ever taken, all in the hope that he himself can stop being Stanley Pines.
#gravity falls#grunkle stan#stanley pines#STANLEYYYYYY#STANLEY THEY COULD NEVER MAKE ME HATE YOU STANLEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#sharky rants#Just. Imagine the fucking shame you have to live with#the shame that you can never be yourself. That anything you were is unwanted and forgotten#The shame of just BEING- Of taking space of- of /breathing-/#Imagine the world; your friend; your family; your colleagues being so ashamed of having known you#that you feel more comfortable with a persona to present.#You feel more comfortable stealing the identity of someone you care for deeply if only to help#If only to feel capable for once. To feel like you belong- Like youre doing something good for once#Imagine the shame that brings you to be comfortable not being yourself for 40 years.#ALL CASE YOU BROKE ONE FUCKING PROJECT??????? COME ON#I mean- the deeprooted shame was started from earlier. He was 'the stupid twin“; 'the troublemaker”; “the cheat and thief”#This was a long time coming#But those werent MISTAKES- The one time he genuinely made a Mistake he lost everything#Like he really mattered so little to the people around him#and he cant really blame them.#My cousin is a genius. Hes smart and academically achieved since I was a baby.#The only thing I had that he didnt was my ability to draw. to be creative. The guy for the longest time had a better social life then me too#I used to get brought to tears seeing his accomplishments- seeing people praise him. The shame lived in me any time I had to see him#The shame that I was the black sheep of the family next to the golden standard for a son- for a student- for a friend.#when I was none of those things#And Im lucky he was my cousin- cause if he was my brother that would have haunted me EVERY DAY rather then once or twice a year#Im better with it now; Im more content with who I am- But trauma dump aside-#I very very very much understand Stans shame in being the stupid one. The unachieved one in a family full of achieved people#the shame thats angry at him for being better. at the family for treating him special. and most of all at yourself that you cant be better#its a visceral feeling that I sadly understand
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"I love you, Zevran. I hope you know that."
"Yes... Yes, I know that."
— commission art by @sinizade, posted with permission
#***i want to clarify I commd this art from sinizade and this art is not my own!! please go follow them and comm them if you can!!#Something I commissioned in 2023 by the lovely sinizade! One of my fave pieces I've ever commissioned (still my background on my computers)#I could have gone for the classic 'In truth for the chance to be at your side I would storm the Dark City itself. Never doubt it' quote#which is honestly why this has been sitting in my drafts for so long. but this quoate is so simple and soft... i love it. and i love them!#anyways i too have the DAtV fever so ill be resharing some comms I've had done over the years :)#zevran#zevran arainai#zevran x warden#zevran x aeducan#warden aeducan#aeducan#da oc — riryn aeducan#also yes the ref is from tangled im not ashamed#dragon age#dragon age origins#commissioned art
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Emma may?
Pretty please?
Ask, and you shall receive 🙌🙂↕️
Dang, Fiddleford was THIS 🤏 close to fumbling the baddie of the freaking century
#YES I HEAD CANON HER BLACK SHHHH#She#guys I fell in love with her while drawing her#also ignore the fact that I can't draw children because..... dang I can't draw children 😭#I am so freakin bad at coming up with outfits guys I'm ashamed don't look at her clothes#cole's art#gravity falls#art#grunkle stan#stanley pines#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddleford hadron mcgucket#emma may dixon#emma may mcgucket#fiddlestan#FiddEmmaStan#fiddemma#emmastan#tate mcgucket#baby tate#And Stan Makes Four AU#guy i promise I'm drawing the comic 😭#(I'm lying I haven't drawn it in four days 🤞)#ngl i did not see this ask until I checked my ask box 😭 glad i saw it in time 🙏🙏
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Long car trips mean hunch over my ipad and film dumb stupid videos in restaurants at 11pm 😍 (future me screw u idk if it’s shaky also do not perceive me)
(That one vine)
Also have the things
#I didn’t even plan to use this audio LMAO#it worked ig I just added words#hijack#jackycup#it’s so wild yall car trips fuck me up cuz what do u mean I slept 4 hours straight and now there’s snow#IN CALI??#ate some bomb ass food tho while filming and my sis just stared at me the whole time 😔#ig that’s how toofthelss greets people LMAO#expressions are fun#I may not animatic but I can sure hope and dream#if u see this no u didn’t#a little loopy it’s fine yall#edit: omgf ITS SO SHAKY I AM ASHAMED#TY FOR LIKING THIS BUT ALSO WOW DO I KINDA HAYE IT#😔 it’s ok I’ll just dig a hole and lay down for a while it’s fine
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studying queer history (i’m watching star trek)
#I think i’m so funny#star trek#spirk#star trek tos#spock#james t kirk#watching this show is like a punch in the face#like you hear abt how this is like the first ‘ship’#and you go yeah right 🙄#I bet this show from the 60s is sooo gay#and then BOOM#2nd episode ‘I feel ashamed of our friendship’#WOW#now that’s television#mine
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