#I was like… why isn’t she working
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Writing tips for audio dramas: You have to make your characters just a little bit unhinged.
Like not a lot, but these people are monologuing left and right, and you have to be a little bit unhinged for that.
#this is about one specific character#I did crack the code#I was like… why isn’t she working#it’s because she needed to be more unhinged#God bless whatever VA has to read these lines#witherburn after school news#witherburn#wasn#wbasn#podcast#audio drama
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I think it’s so ironic that the Pony Express escapes a lot if not all blame in discussion. I can’t even say I am excused from it but it’s just how hard people circle back to the characters alone without considering the environment they were made to be in.
Why would they design a ship where only two of the rooms lock? Not the bathroom? Not the sleeping quarters? We assume that all the companies in the universe are this shallow and careless to their workers but we explicitly know the Pony Express in extra vile. They are fed processed slop pack they can’t even really cook and the ration of those pack is meager at best. They hired and made people with a plethora of conflicting demeanors and beliefs work together on a mission where cohesion is important if not an outright necessity and punish them for not being happy about it. There’s no social protocols, not chain of command other than Captain’s word/choice and the only way to enforce that is with a literal firearm. They don’t allow them to celebrate freely and even took away leisure activities that would make them less stir crazy. They are only allowed a few hours of sleep despite their being no other real responsibilities or work on the ship, no matter the position or its importance. With any crew, with any level of synergy, this was a powder keg waiting for a spark.
I’m not saying characters that made mistakes didn’t make huge ones, but I think part of the horror is that at least for some (this is targeting Jimathan) those mistakes are partly made by a force of the hand. There’s a running theme of lack of choice and being forced into something and the very nature of how The Pony Express expected them to function plays a big part.
#like even I forget that all actions taken in the game were people trying to remain in protocol outside of Jimmy#Anya couldn’t have jus stolen the scanner and got the gun cause she’s a sensible person and knows she’d be in legal trouble#or get everyone’s credits docked or just hoping that there’s some chain of command for this sort of thing#Daisuke only really acted in accordance to his direct superiors because he’s an intern he wouldn’t know the first thing about protocol or#what to do in any situation. like this is essentially implied to be his first real job#Curly may be the captain but he still has to follow rules and procedures and we see with the letter the Pony Express likely has very shady#and shitty ones. he gives the best not depressing or totalitarian options he can otherwise everything is just his word which aren’t even his#or like him just asserting his position with the gun which he wouldn’t do#Swansea follows the book begrudgingly because he’s trying to stay right and not fall back into who he once was#I feel like it’s not incorporated nearly enough that the environment they were dropped into heavily affected their actions#say there was a single person higher than Curly or a plan of action when a crew member is considered a danger to himself or others#I think it’s fascinating how people will stick to protocol and break when they get scared or to their limit#cause the game shows how normalcy deteriorates and I think discounting what the characters where put through by the company takes a way a#real and scary aspect of what happened to Anya because as a friend Curly didn’t do enough for her at all his comfort was there and he#appreciated but it was a distracted sort of care but as a Captain he didn’t protect her but he’s was a Captain of the Pony Express like what#if they told him to wait to? he still should’ve done something because Anya was actively suffering and Jimmy should’ve been reprimanded but#he’s a captain with orders like the Tulpar isn’t his ship in the same way like#god I wanna explain this in a way that makes sense but the Tulpar is like designed to breed animosity and work on the bare requirements one#needs to get things done that’s not how people work and if anyone deviates or interrupts that it literally has nothing to handle it#it becomes clear that if any social unrest happens why they just say fuck it and give the Captain the gun because if something happens the#blame can easily be placed on the person they put in charge despite what they put them#in charge of like this is just like work place harassment irl because often the perpetrators are not punished but the supervisors for not#stopping them with meetings or cuts or whatever but the environment the company fostered is rarely fixed or blamed#like why was this allowed to occur? and honestly that is because Jimmy did what he did#ask me about this if this is confusing cause I worded it crazy#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#the pony express
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leaks from the anime post bnha 430……. #REAL #NOTFAKE
#dabihawks#tododeku#bnha 430#mha 430#bnha spoilers#mha spoilers#boku no hero academia#keigo takami#touya todoroki#shoto todoroki#izuku midoriya#now I’m going to tag the fankid. the old art is terrible do not perceive it#kaito todoroki#hishiro todoroki#SO WHAT IM PROPOSING IS……#hawks goes to work with ochako on the quirk counseling business rather than wtf he’s doing on the ranking system#dabi lives and is reformed and gets plastic surgery (but wants to keep some of his scars as a statement…) and he works with natsuo#he and natsuo have a soba shop. that only sells soba and boba#still trying to decide if Hishiro is a dabihawks kid or natsuos kid#hence why hawks doesn’t say ‘son’#I also think endeavor isn’t done with his bs and before his . UGH. ‘redemption’ signed a quirk marriage pact for Shoto#shoto and his wife (haven’t decided on a name yet but she’s ballin) try to make it work but they realize it just. it doesn’t#BUT OOPS SHE WAS PREGANTE. and she figures Shoto would. honestly be fine raising the kid there’s danger out there in the states#shoto’s also winding down on heroism bc it’s really. honestly I think he would also like to work at a soba shop#he doesn’t. but. I feel like there’s a reason he just mainly goes on midnight patrols yk?#anyway he and deku raise the kid . the mom’s involved as much as she can be while being the . yeah I think she would be the most famous hero#in the United States . good for her …. good for her………#if you wanna see me elaborate…… u know what to do… hit up that inbox#or if u wanna know what happened to the rest of class 1-a in my future au……
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The Return of Raggapuppy! Now with more fluff!
Click for better quality cuz tumblr clearly doesn’t like my camera
Ok so when @ask-the-rag-dolly briefly blessed us with more werewolf Ragatha I had the urge to draw her again. But then I went back to the first sketch that I had of this and thought “Yeah, this could be better” So I updated doggo Ragatha to look fluffier and fit closer to a werewolf design and I fixed Pomni up while I was at it. I’m a lot happier with it now.
#I guess I just love drawing Pomni being the comforter in the relationship#I know everyone likes to depict Ragatha as the comforting one but the woman is barely holding herself together and she’s canonically BAD at#Pomni is a lot more patient and understanding when her guard isn’t up#But like…in a sincere way. Not in a ‘brush the bad thoughts away cuz everything’s fine actually’ kinda way#Everyone has a limit and after episode 2 if feel like Ragatha is rapidly approaching her’s#Which is why it’s great that Pomni has finally come to see the others as support. But it would be neat to see her acting as support again.#Also dog Ragatha will always be a puli breed in my eyes. it just works too well#I also really love the way Mod Bee draws Pomni’s hair so I tried to replicate it.#The more I draw Pomni the more I realize how pretty she is.#the amazing digital circus#tadc#pomni#ragatha#pomni x ragatha#ragapom#werewolf Ragatha#ask the rag dolly#my art
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Lmao I really love how canonically Alcina said this to her daughters:
@ Bela: “I expect results.”
@ Cassandra: “you’re my daughter, act like it.”
And then there is Daniela and Alcina is just “have fun!”
#house dimitrescu#cassandra dimitrescu#daniela dimitrescu#bela dimitrescu#alcina dimitrescu#resident evil village#resident evil 8#re8#it’s the way Alcina babies Daniela#she leaves the actual work to bela and Cassandra and dani is just there to enjoy herself#but it’s not always fun and games because dani notices this and instead of enjoying her freedom she often thinks that her mama doesn’t#think of her as capable as her sisters#that she’ll never be as good as them that’s why she’s excluded from many things and never sent alone for any of these things#idk i was going thru the game again and I noticed these lines between Alcina and her bug spawns#like bela is her eldest and she’s expected to handle things on her own#Cassandra is also ruthless and Alcina wants her to put that skill into work#she was literally like ‘stop messing around and bring me Ethan’s head’ because Cassandra was scaring him at random with her ‘rawr’ and ‘bo!’#like pls stop playing hide and seek with the man and kill him already#Daniela is different because he’s Alcina wants her to have fun but she worries about her#she isn’t as strong as her sisters that’s why she’s kept in the library while her sisters go on the hunt#she’s just young okay#still learning#that’s why mama gets worried about her and woukd rather keep her somewhere safe than send her into danger#like even during normal hunts Daniel is never alone
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the doctor is emotionally manipulative. he’s very good at it, and even better at justifying it both to himself and the people he’s doing it to. he can see when his approval, his affection, is valuable enough to someone that withholding it will be an effective way of getting them to do what he wants. this is one of his best flaws, that he’ll do this to people and do it to them for his own definition of what’s good for them.
(gestures vaguely) twissy.
#I LIKE THIS ABOUT HIM. I FEEL LIKE I HAVE TO KEEP SAYING THAT. I like this. its a very good flaw. its very consistent.#its there in all iterations of him (that i’ve seen)#in early episodes with rose he’ll get angry and emotionally withdrawn when she pokes at his trauma. and he knows that it’ll work because in#her own words: don’t argue with the designated driver.#he does it to jack like. a lot in utopia. his judgment only has so much sway over jack because jack is Obsessed with him and he knows that.#jack unsettles him. he uses that control to feel less unsettled. especially when he can’t do it to the actual threat of that finale: the#master. (though. he tries. that’s what the whole ‘i forgive you’ thing is about.)#eleven is practically Made of this impulse. he does it to amy. he does it to river. he does it to rory to a much lesser extent but that’s#because rory has. a vague idea? of how to have healthy boundaries. if not with amy then at least with the doctor.#that’s why his speech about people wanting to impress the doctor making him dangerous is so important. rory can See what he’s doing.#and twelve. obviously. does this to clara. clara also does it right back. this is why they are made for each other alsjjfgjakdj.#and. he does it to missy. because. and i cannot emphasize this enough. he keeps her. in a box.#I ENJOY THIS ABOUT HIM. HE’S A FUCKED UP LITTLE GUY!!!! WITH ISSUES ABOUT HOW HE REALLY REALLY WANTS TO IMPOSE HIS OWN MORALITY ONTO PEOPLE#HE KNOWS HE SHOULDNT BUT HE ALSO GETS FRUSTRATED AND HE DOES IT ANYWAY!!!!#and sometimes it’s unintentional. sure. sometimes it *really really* isn’t though. like.#and sometimes it’s both. sometimes it’s the result of him lashing out and reaching for a familiar coping mechanism in the moment.#but the point is the doctor does this.#doctor who
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does anyone have any good fics where vi works for Silco and jinx was in Stillwater?
#idk I think it would be a cool concept#like silco finding vi after she ran away#that would be a great way to showcase silco’s manipulation#to be able to convince a girl who was ready to kill him to adopt him as a father figure#I don’t think they would be as close as jinx and silco though#but vi and sevika working together#obviously vi isn’t a tinkerer but imagine vi working for silco who can take out squads of enforcers with her fists#that would be sick#and a jinx who’s gone insane in prison cooped up with nothing but her hallucinations#who started going by jinx in Stillwater#because she firmly believes that’s what she is#that’s why she’s in prison#also like a begrudging friends dynamic between Cait and Jinx#also bonus points for caitvi enemies to lovers#like come on#and ACTUAL enemies to lovers would be nice for once#instead of mild dislike to lovers#which is still great#jinx working with Viktor#almost half of their prototypes aren’t allowed to be shown to the public because they’re covered in scribbles#hell I don’t know if jinx would be allowed to be shown to the public#also uhhh I wouldn’t mind some lightcannon#oh who am I kidding this is just my outline for a fic#I should just write this myself#ok google docs get ready for some word vomit#arcane#vi arcane#jinx arcane#swap au#arcane silco
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every day without fail I pace and talk to myself like I’m fucking gollum thinking about how much the Isabella arc could’ve been a amazing arc where Edward goes through a scenario deeply similar to what he did to Kristen if given the right buildup (aka making him slowly get to the mental state where he would date a girl who looks exactly like his first girlfriend no questions asked)
it’s not just the fact Oswald killed Edward’s lover to get to him just what Ed did to Kristen. It’s also the power dymantic, how this was the first person they truly felt like cared for them deeply, the exception. It’s about how they both have power above that emotional investment (Edward being psychically stronger than Kristen, Oswald having financial power over Edward since he is his boss and Edward also lives under him). It is about how they both decided to keep a part of them after the fallout whether it be Edward with Kristen’s glasses or Oswald with Edward’s frozen body. A perverse trophy. IT IS ABOUT HOW BOTH FALLOUTS WERE TAKEN AS A LESSON ABOUT LOVE TO JUSTIFY WHAT THEY DID.
I’m so mad that they fumbled this arc on both sides. I am in deep unspeakable agony as I type this. Honestly their first mistake was writing Isabella to be someone who matched Edward’s freak since they quite literally had that with Oswald. But whatever I don’t care for this mid show
#rambles#edward nygma#gotham#nygmobblepot#gotham 2014#gotham fox#Whatever idgaf#I know I said this before but idc I’ll say it again. It should’ve been framed like that I’m so mad#I know there is some intentional shit in this but I don’t feel like it fully was#If it were then the writers would realize how sketchy Isabella is. She works better as an abuser I’m sorry. I don’t like it#Gotham saying they looked into ocd for Edward character wise and then making Isabella do unconsenual exposure therapy one week in and he’s#just fine. His worry is fixed. Wow great ocd rep Gotham wow ur so good at writing mental illness#I know this isn’t related to my post really but it just sucks. I struggle daily with intrusive thoughts and his fear of killing her felt#similar to ocd obsessions even though he is a real threat to her. It sucks seeing suck a reckless action to try to quell that fear be#celebrated by the narrative. Dawg this wouldn’t fucking make him feel better he’s only known her for one week my guy is going to go kms#whatever whatever I don’t give a fuck. Why would I care about gothams constant ableism I know they do it
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I know it’s been talked about ad nauseam, but I think one of the things that got lost in the discourse about TTPD and the muses and whatnot is how one of, if not the core trigger points of the album is the yearning for commitment and perhaps even more poignantly, motherhood.
The reason she was so susceptible to falling for the “conman’s get love quick schemes” is because she was grieving that imagined life with the person she had long assumed would be the one to give her that. What has been beyond clear in several albums, let alone interviews etc, is that those plans for building a family were very much real and top of mind for years, and she kept holding on and shifting her world in service of making that happen. And when whatever happened happened that pulled that rug out from under her, it left her bereft not just for the relationship that had once been her world but also the imagined family she had been hoping for and sticking out the hard times for.
And that’s likely why she was swayed by and trusting of the promises of someone who knew her history and knew how unmooring that loss was to her. It may have been partially about the person himself or lust or whatever, but the core issue was the pain of giving up the dream, and sublimating that dream into this new opportunity in front of her, because she was so desperate to hold onto the last scraps of that imagined life she wanted so badly. (And I don’t mean desperate as in pathetic or negative, I mean as in fighting within the last ounce of energy and hope she had.) It wasn’t rational and it wasn’t love, it was grief, not just for a relationship but even more so for the family it represented.
So to me the core issue of TTPD isn’t just the Joe vs. Matty or whoever of it all: it’s Taylor and her yearning. She wanted a family badly and a life that was theirs and was processing losing that in all kinds of ways. It’s all over the album in overt and subtle lyrics. It may not have been grieving a literal death but I’d bet it felt pretty darn close.
And I’d also bet that’s why we’re seeing… what we’re seeing now.
(I have so many more thoughts about womanhood and motherhood on TTPD but that is another post being worked on piecemeal in my drafts… this is just a little Saturday morning post-zoomies reflection)
#I’m trying to be delicate about all this on main#if you catch my drift#obviously I don’t know any of these people#I’m just using my ears with the music and my eyeballs on the screen#honestly think she’d almost gotten to the point where she would have given up almost anything#(including marriage)#if it meant having kids and a commitment#let alone all the career stuff she was willing to let slide#but in the end none of that mattered#writing letters addressed to the fire#the tortured poets department#and like..#this is also why she was so clear minded about what she wanted in a partner when she started dating killa#and not as in opportunist but as in she knew what she wouldn’t compromise on anymore#and luckily for her he was on the same page#and tbh why this isn’t all that fast#ugh I wish my brain would let me finish the other post I was working on#like I know we’ve kind of been dancing around this in recent years in discussion#even if we all had our own assumptions#but she kind of ripped the bandaid off in ttpd#and with ~everything~ now happening#I think it’s ok to talk about? respectfully? lol
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look at the way i ride ~
#lyss.vent#been feeling very much on the edge lately#of what? i’m not really sure#a classic Meltdown ™ maybe#i have a therapist i talk to weekly now and that’s been a huge help fs#but it’s still like#my boat has a hole#too many to count actually#i’m constantly dumping out the water but it doesn’t matter yk?#i’m still sinking#there are so many things i should be thankful for#friends and family that care about me#i have hobbies that i enjoy#a good consistent job that pays well#i’m working 40 hrs a week and making enough to save monthly#this is what it means to be successful right ?#i should be happy…i have everything i need…#yet i feel rundown and empty#i’ve also realized that there are horrible ugly things that still live deep inside my bones#why do i blame myself for them when i was just there? when i was the victim?#i’m the only one who can save myself from it all so why can’t i?#what’s even worse is that i have to watch from the sidelines while life single-handedly fucks up my loved ones too#i’m so powerless in all aspects of my life#everything’s out of my control#and it hurts so much :(((#tbh old me would’ve given up by now but that dumb bitch isn’t in the driver’s seat anymore#she’s just along for the ride now but she won’t give me the aux#tho new me is stubborn and has something to prove so i’ll keep driving :3 vroom vroommm#i’ll play my own music soon#i love queue ☆〜(ゝ。∂)
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lol didn’t think someone giving money would give me anxiety
#to the judge that’s gonna see this case next year and the lawyer that is representing it assuming the state idk how this all works#why has the person to say the least get to go a whole year without consequence? a known criminal who after stealing from me and being#released and again getting arrest now for gang violence or some shit she was let go? she maybe associated to the group that killed that boy#last year. and here i am panicking because im afraid to carry cash. im paranoid that imma go outside and my car will be missing. i’m get#panic attacks when i drive to close to that gym and tired going back but physically cannot get out of my car and i start to cry in the#parking lot. i’m not sitting at work shaking forcing myself not to cry because someone handed me cash and i’m afraid someone is going to#steal my purse again. you think that’s not a big deal and honestly i didn’t think it was until my purse was gone. my cards stolen and used.#my key missing EVERYTHING in my purse GONE. so many things in there plus the purse i had money and all that is stuff i paid for now im out#all that cash i’m out 500$ for a key replacement i stopped feeling safe leaving my house all my non replaceable things gone and everyone#spoke to me like it was my fault and had to stand their crying while adults told me not to use a gym locker ??? but in the same breath telli#telling me this isn’t the first time she’s done this she has a warrant for her arrest she’s known to steal cars i’m the problem and there’s#nothing they can do to help me. so while i cry because all the money i had lost and never got back i had to do ALL the work to call my bank#track where my cards were being spent at call the jpay line she transferred money to look up the person she cashapped money to call the#business she was actively spending money at ask the manger if she is currently there and if they could give the police all the receipts and#video of her there for them to act like the hero’s for my brother and i tracking her down while you all belittled me#FUCK YOU AND FUCK HER i can’t be fucking normal about STUPID mundane shit i’m stuck here shaking and crying and what you tell me later it’s#not a big deal? give me all the content of your car and wallet or purse or backpack take nothing out and see what you’re left with and how m#much you need to spend to drive your car again and to tow your car home let a stranger have all your cards and address and tell me you feel#safe#OH and for the gym to tell me they know about her she used to be an employee there she doesn’t have a membership so they don’t know how she#got in and they can’t help but she did steal from another girl that night and an employee last month and who knows how many more ppl like#that’s convenient you pos sounds like she has friends that still work at the gym and open the back door for her or just let her in that’s#crazy no ? and this is all alleged because when if i lost all these things i can’t speak on what did or didn’t happen that’s some crazy bull#shit anyways the towing company felt bad for me maybe because i hadn’t stopped crying they gave me the key replacement number and told me to#mention he referred me so i could get a discount and the layman felt back for me because when i called him i started to cry and when he told#me the price i cried harder so 500$ was the cheapest but pretty much my whole check#key man*#bad** LET ME FIX TAGS#allegedly all these ppl are privileged kids from a privileged background that grew up in a sheltered community and thing there’s no#consequences to their actions because of the lack of accountability from their parents who willing pay for people to look the other way
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#in cleaning my room yesterday I activated some of the like. dormant dust that was laying around and i didn’t get much sleep last night#bc i was just coughing and wheezing and stuff. i got the rest of it this morning but I still feel like shit and i don’t wanna go to class#i feel like i can’t#i know im lucky but i feel like im always sick or something is always in pain or im fatigued. It’s a wonder i get anything done#I think im suffering from senioritis even though i still have grad school#i’m just so so tired#my prof was wearing a mask last class which isn’t normal in my area and like. good on her for wearing it but if she’s sick she shouldn’t#come to school#idk why (actually i do it’s capitalism) it’s so normalized to keep going to school and work even if you’re sick#like you can’t miss for menstrual cramps or allergies even if they get debilitating. can’t miss for a mental health crisis#i’ve had coworkers throw up mid shift and keep working bc they can’t afford to clock out#i feel like it’s only acceptable to stay home sick if you’re continuously throwing up aka not useful for the business#ugh#rose.txt#tw vent
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I keep seeing fanarts of ppl's OC's being on the ship, so do you think that if there was 6st crewmember (specifically, another woman) Anya would've been more safe? Like, someone to actually call Jimmy's begaviour out, someone Anya might wanna trust? Is there a possibility something might have changed (even if a little) or it would not have mattered at all?
-💀
I feel like the game would make it part of the commentary on where she would believe and help Anya but still be sort of dismissive? Like the whole “don’t waste time crying and being scared keep going and move on, don’t let him win”. It’s supposed to be positive and reinforcing but sometimes it does more damage in those times of mourning and grief, it feels patronizing, like you don’t understand what you’re going through but they do. Even if they did call out his behavior it’s still on Curly to act and while another voice would help, it’s still 4 against 2 on guys that don’t get it until they have to vs women who always have to.
I don’t mind mouthwashing OCs but I do get a bit bored as they tend to be borderline saviors or like Jimmy aligned. They are either more complicit than Curly or just Jimmy haters for no reason, outside of what the creators know about what he did to Anya. I am never irked by OCs but in a story like mouthwashing you really need to think about what your character adds to the commentary, especially if they are there during the crash. It’s nice to have like characters on Anya’s side more whole heartedly and interesting to see characters who placate Jimmy but sometimes it’s one note.
I can’t and don’t want to police peoples OCs it’s never my intention when I comment on trends I notice, but I do feel like the way people make their OCs interact with these two characters and especially Curly, really show a grave misunderstanding of the narrative and these characters as people vs roles in the story. Still, I know people just make up characters for fun and that’s fine. Great even, but I guys I’m focusing more on OCs that are supposed to have those serious dynamics. My favs tend to be pretty-Tulpar or post-Tulpar au OCs.
The inevitably of the crash is on Jimmy. He did that not because he wasn’t stopped but because all his means to kill Anya were taken. The gun, the axe. Even if Curly did strip him of his co-pilot privileges and try to keep him contained there’s only so many people. An extra body helps but they have jobs they have to do, he’s the only one steering the whole ship and Jimmy would likely have an out: food, bathroom, etc. He’s not new and if he couldn’t crash the ship directly, who’s to say he wouldn’t sabotage something else? A clunker like the Tulpar wouldn’t take much. An extra person helps but it’s just another thing that prolongs what a person like Jimmy is willing to do to shirk responsibility.
It’s more than just needing someone to stand up to him and think that’s what is missing when it comes to inserting a character into the mouthwashing setting.
#like again most people treat Jimmy like a misanthrope and he’s not and the way he’s just evil/rude to everyone all the time just isn’t real#like he’s snarky and rude but it can’t be 100% of the time like hes not going out his way to instigate#he’s the type to say shit and hope it stirs the pot like Daisuke likes him at first#thinks he’s a bit of a jerk but he likes him like unless you specifically make a character he’s dislike he’s not just gonna be#readily antagonistic to strangers or at the get go#not to mention it’s not just about Anya needing a friend but someone with the power to do something#a point in why she confides in Curly is he’s the captain she’s not just gonna tell the only other woman just because it’s still personal#not every girl tells their friend or another woman especially if they are new and they don’t know how they react not all girls are#girls girls some can be just as toxic as the men they are being confided in about#the nuance of the situation is not solved by having more people who actively hate jimmmy if anything it would make him escalate further as#clearly has issues with how people perceive him and being liked like another woman who hates him that’s gonna do something crazy in his mind#I think it’s interesting when OCs explore another side of the pre established dynamics as Jimmy uses each remaining crew member to fill a#something Curly provided for him and represent his dynamic with Anya and being an abuser I just feel like a lot is being missed out on#and it’s mainly cause people don’t want to make OCs that aren’t great people like it’s okay to have a grey mediocre OCs in situations like#this its realistic and helps you write more grounded characters like idk i like the ocs but eh im not like a super fan#I really should make an analysis on Jimmy cause people hate discussing him and his character is being really misunderstood#like not saying she’s innocent or an excuse but just not getting how he is supposed to work like he’s no dick fucking dasteredly#he’s a shitty guy who gets shittier like he ain’t start out an avengers level threat#mouthwashing#💀 anon#mouthwashing game#ask#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing oc#now I gotta make an oc just to prove myself but I can’t draw#so maybe not cuz what’s the point if I can’t explain the fly drip
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idek why but this is Peak Romance(TM)
#the ending of Emma! is so warm and so funny#and so good#every emotional beat is so true#I also love the part where Emma learns that Harriet is engaged and she’s so overflowing with happiness#because one of her two obstacles to happiness has been removed#(And she’s working on the other obstacle her dad)#and it says she has to move around and talk to herself and laugh before she can be around anyone again#and I just—-aksjsjjsjdjdjdjd#I love it SO much. I have experienced that before!!!#just times where the overflow of happiness makes you so giddy and almost foolish you have to be alone#ALSO. I’ve been reflecting because years ago I read a piece of literary criticism that said that Emma never learns or changes#she’s Sad and forced to face the consequences of her Actions for like one afternoon#and then everything she wants to happen happens#and she gets to sort of just dance away with a sparkle in her eye#and the criticism was like ‘good for her but this is not a journey of change or growth’#and I’ve always been haunted by it because there is something true about it? Emma is still Emma is still Emma#and also because when I teach it I sort of have to be like ‘Emma has changed! and feels bad about stuff!’ because that’s just kind of#how you have to do it with teenagers/and/or it’s what THEY say#and I can’t contradict them but it doesn’t feel exactly true either#and I don’t know. it’s sort of hitting me this time around that there is just a deepening of Emma’s sweetness#in the second half of the novel and that’s why it always feels so warm#like. with Lizzy the change is so big you can absolutely feel it! it’s undeniable and it rocks her entire (internal) world#Darcy’s letter forces a change in her worldview. in her views of her family and her sisters and Wickham and Jane and just everything#but the box hill scene isn’t that with Emma —but it does pierce through …. something#some kind of flippancy maybe? coldness? she IS more likable in the second half of the book#and yet she is no different. idk I’m struggling to name it exactly#maybe it is a kind of growing up. it never feels quite as simple or as obvious as ‘now she has learned and will never do it again’#I actually think Emma will do it again a LOT lol (the small joke about shipping Mrs. Weston’s daughters with her nephews that Austen makes)#but it’s like—-the lifeblood of her heart has started flowing differently—if that makes sense#she crosses a threshold on the drive home from Box Hill when she sits in the back of the carriage and cries silently
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Woke up thinking about Neve Gallus becoming more infamous than the family who left her behind.
#[ introspection ] its not what keeps me up at night. its not the quiet. i never could sleep once work gets in my head.#[ woke up thinking about 17-19 year old nev.e just starting out as they leave her ]#[ abandoned and shunned because she refused to leave with them ]#[ remember in movies and there was always the concept of that young questioner or reporter that trailed after important people#[ where she’s asking questions at a rapid fire before she loses them or gets shoved away and shove her away they do. ]#[ yeah at one time that was Neve ]#[ the scrawny nobody with nothing but a notebook and small writing pen and ink ignored by everyone#who lived in a shady little beat down apartment in the back of a forgotten alley#both ignored those in charge and her own people living in Docktown ]#[ dozens of those people she wanted to help turning her away too and telling her there was no point to it- to go home and leave them alone#[ Hal likely doesn't even remember the first time she showed up with nothing but the money she scraped up for the food that day ..#or maybe he does. that's why he doesn't take her seriously when she shows up (endearing wise) because he still#remembers that scrawny half starved detective who was hired for a job no one cared to take only stopping by there on#runs between her office and her bunk. ]#[ for me its funny also imagining this young neve- before she lost her leg- crossing paths with a young also nobody Rana standing guard#as a faceless foot soldier- who was nothing more than a suit of armor by the door with her fellows - watching this young detective#chase after her boss asking him questions no one dARED to ask and just thought she was either bold..or stupid.. maybe both. ]#[ the fact in Neve’s mind she’s still that girl. ]#[ still that little nobody who isn’t doing enough ]#[ ANYWAY! Neve Ga.llus feels today!! ]
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had a really funny idea for an ask blog ft. Vanny and another plex employee oc,,
#Get this right. 2 pizzaplex employees accidentally get tumblr famous bc someone has been leaving weird graffiti everywhere and#Getting up to other shenanigans and sends asks abt it to this one like urban exploration blog. Who later gets an ask basically like#Hey I work at the plex?? This is some insider info only another employee would know????#The two anons are constantly back and forth in this persons inbox and are eventually assigned nicknames#‘Pix’ for the mystery vandalism employee because she shows up as nothing but weird pixels and glitches on cameras#The other employee is ‘Cam’ because they have been monitoring all this on the cameras#One day they get each others blogs and keep sending each other death threats and shit jokingly but one day pix warns cam not to go to a#Weird late staff meeting#The next night it is literally just the two of them and they think this is so funny they start a blog trying to uncover why everyone else#Just isn’t coming in. At first they are like well layoffs duhhhh#But then ppl send asks and messages like ‘hey have u seen this employee it’s my brother/friend/etc’ and they realize shit is actually going#On in here#One night cam is live-blogging their shift and sees a weird intruder in a costume with a knife and runs around eventually escaping and find#Pix lying at the bottom of a stairwell unconscious with a bloody nose later#Takes pix to the hospital. Only to be alone in the plex the next night and suddenly get a phone call saying that pix left the hospital. Bc#Pix left cam as the emergency contact because ‘she didn’t have anyone else’.#Cam has to survive the masked intruder#eventually starts recording everything but when the intruder gets closer the footage gets glitchier#Eventually there’s just one fuzzy image of the intruder with Roxy and Monty standing on either side and that’s the last we hear of cam. Nex#Post is pix saying hehe thanks for following our little story aha !! Bye now it’s over!! And that’s it…..heheheheh#Killer rab blog has become a little boring for me so… might start this soon….#I’d have to make like 2 blogs plus some fake dms too probably . Damn
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