#I was able to get things done
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1/13/24
So today my focus was on getting my rats to spend a LOT of time mingling in a safe environment where I could watch them because I really want everyone getting along and things have been so difficult lately and strange but that’s a story for another time but my rats have spent a lot of time together today and I’m really hopeful all the girls will finally be able to live together in the big CN. Fingers crossed!
The other thing I focused on was cleaning the house, I was able to get a lot done around the house and I’m feeling really happy about that, I even used my brand new steam mop that I was gifted for Christmas!
Honestly I’m over the moon about the new steam mop and the house feels a lot better, I am not finished but I just wanted to take note of this good feeling I’m having today and share a happy feeling.
#thank you universe#I was able to get things done#honeycombhank#healing#my pets#rats of tumblr#my rats#cute rats#pets#cleaning#clean up#christmas gift#steam mop#new cleaning supplies#goals#today I did#dumbo rats#yay!#happy feelings
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Our hextech dream….
#the thing is#I’m so excited for the final act to drop#but I’m also so sad because arcane is such a gem#there is very few pieces of media that is so well done#well written well animated well thought out and cared for#the only shows that come close to this level of quality get CANCELLED#So to be able to enjoy a complete and well crafted story as good as this#bro I feel lucky#sad it’s over but I can’t wait#(it’s also insanely rewatchable so I’m not TOO torn up about if#my art#arcane#arcane league of legends#viktor league of legends#viktor arcane#jayce talis#arcane jayce#jayce league of legends#jayvik
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i'm exactly as normal about him as I thought I'd be
#my art#trigun stampede#vash the stampede#trigun#trigun vash#vash#tristamp#trigun stampede fanart#trigun fanart#idk the tags fr this fandom sorry its babys first trigun#im not abandoning jjk but expect more other stuff sprinkled in!! including trigun <333 including him <3#ANYWAY IM SOOOOO NORMAL ABTHIM IM SO NORMAL I PROMISE#im lying im sorry im feral about him i want unspeakable things done 2 him it was over the moment i heard his voice#but [redacted] thoughts aside#hes so fun to draw oh my god how did they make a character Exactly For Me how did they make one that ticks all my boxes#hes blond but like i can work with it i will get good at rendering blond hair for him <333 hes worth it <333333#i was cruisin along mindin my business having fun learning how 2 draw him and then i get 2 the arm . +24hrs to total drawtime#all my cheats ...my safety net of being able 2 use flesh to disguise th fact that u dont reeeeally know where tendons or joints go...#out th window. this prosthetic is practically an anatomically correct model. u can see EVERYTHINg#put my entire me into trying to figure it out h i think it is ok i think i like it#god i rly cant get over how he's just a combination of all the fun parts of drawing yuuji megumi AND gojo#he is the center of their triple venn diagram and i am EATING HIM ALIVE#sorry ill calm down .... fr now.... smile :)
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part 2 to my modern AU📘📗💕 (part 1)
#its such a minor thing but ive been wanting to draw seb in just a plain t-shirt forever LMAO#also next part is them at a house party hehehe bc i love the trope of a goody two shoes getting way too drunk BAHAHA#ive done it in my fic too...clora you are forever destined to never be able to hold your alcohol just so i can stress seb out LMAO😇#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x mc#sebastian sallow x oc#choccyart#clora clemons
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Been watching HxH lately
#i am almost done with s1 but this thing popped in my mind yesterday and i wasnt able to get it off my head#like it was that hilarious in my brain#hunter x hunter#hxh#gon freecss#killua zoldyck#kurapika hxh#leorio paladiknight#hxh leorio#gon#killua#leorio#kurapika#digital art#clip studio paint#csp#blame my internet provider for giving me the power
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Congratulations to TEAM CHEESE for winning the popular vote on the Charcuterie poll!
#charcuterie saga#digital art#I initally made the poll as a fun little side thing while I was away and not able to draw -#-and a week later it has become a true battleground of food passion!#I *will* be drawing the charcuterie board soon (I first need to plan out what this thing looks like based on the ratio of votes)#But I also really want to draw more faux stickers like this. Possibly...to make them into actual stickers?#Let's see what the vibes are like after I draw more. I'll do a interest check and if enough people want them...It will be so.#Team Olives and Pickles will get one next. As will team Crackers. You both fought hard but the battle was stacked against you.#Turns out people have very strong opinions about cheese!#Team Jam kept it fun with recommending the most delightful combinations and spreads.#Team meat made me laugh with their chants. Team fruit just wanted a lovely time.#Team crackers were the underdogs but fought a good fight.#Team olives and pickles - you weren't even an official team at the start but you made it your destiny. Well done.#Team Vanilla extract....You made me eat something terrible. Feta. Old chedder. Gouda. Babybel. None of these are good with Vanilla.#Don't ask me how I know that.#(I know I should do a soft goat cheese with some fruit in it. I just haven't had the opportunity yet.)#Thank you all for your participation and for filling my week with whimsy B*)#I've loved drawing these little mice a lot!
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you're so like. inspiring. or i wish i could be inspired. you reblog that post with the blue critter and you're like "im glad i was born on this planet". how do i manage to get that mindset. how do i manage to not want the pain to stop at any cost and enjoy what's still possible to enjoy
It's my first time here and I'm never coming back
#I wanted to write something long and poetic and meaningful#About how I used to be suicidal#And sometimes still get that way#But still find wonder and joy in things#And have just learned to hold on tighter#But like#It's so much simpler than that#I don't believe in reincarnation#Or an afterlife#But I see things every day that are amazing#Things people can do with their hands#Animals I never could have imagined#New food and skills and art and music#And I just remember#Oh yeah#I'm new here#I've never done this before#The universe is infinite and I'm just a speck#And I'm never gonna be able to see it all even if I tried to#And when I'm dead it'll be too late#It's like having ten minutes in a museum before it gets demolished forever with everything in it#I've never been alive before but now I am and it'll be over soon#I'm never coming back#I'm just a tiny piece that gets to think and feel for a while before it's over#It's my very first time living and I'm never coming back#I'm gonna stop existing soon#I'm not gonna have feelings anymore#So what do I wanna do#What do I wanna see before the lights go out
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Just going to cry again (see: my previous post about the parallels between the storage room scene and the abandoned factory scene) about parallels and juxtapositions in the store room scene vs the one in Styles bedroom:
Both these scenes have such a tone of desperation and are characterised by an overflowing of emotions, but in drastically opposite directions.
(Note, some of what I say in this post directly relates to concepts and themes I talked about here, so it may not wholly make sense without that context.)
The scene in the storeroom is filled with frustrated desire. Fadel kisses Style because he wants Style's body and also wants to take his frustrations at Style out on his body. He doesn't need to look Style in the eye (and in fact very intentionally only does so only in small snatches) because this isn't about a connection as much as it is about a release. Fadel's kisses come fast, hard, and are intended to bruise more than to adore.
But episode 5's scene is filled with much more quiet and tender sort of desire. Style is kissing Fadel so much more slowly and purposefully. He keeps looking back at Fadel, checking in to see how he feels and whether Fadel is enjoying it. Everything Style wanted in Episode 3, he now gives to Fadel here, pours the secrets of his knowing and choosing Fadel anyway into the way he presses his lips onto Fadel's skin. His kisses linger, they carry a weight but are somehow infinitely gentle still; Style's kisses contain a purpose that Fadel's kisses couldn't in Episode 3 because in all honesty they were relative strangers back then.
There's also the way there's such a ferocity and carelessness in the way Fadel starts the encounter in episode 3 that is juxtaposed beautifully by the slow, tender, almost hesitant way Style slides his lips onto Fadel's. Both of them are in such different headspaces, between these episodes and its especially evident in the way they care so much more about the other person's comfort and how intentionally they showed that to the audience.
There's hunger present in both scenes but what this hunger is focused on is so drastically different. In the storeroom, they're both mainly focused on a physical release; its primal and visceral but lacked emotional resonance. Fadel gives Style what he knows Style wants (that hint of danger, with the hand on his neck), but its not because he really cares about what Style wants on anything more than a physical level. In Style's bedroom, however, Fadel is drunk (intentionally and by his own design) and desperate to open himself up to Style on an emotional level. Meanwhile, Style wants that desperately too, but knows that Fadel shouldn't because of his own terrible secret. So this kiss is what they both will allow themselves - an honesty and a hunger for this deeper connection they can only share in act but not in words.
In the storeroom, Style wants Fadel to want more than his body but knows (or thinks) he can't push for it yet, so he remains passive, lets Fadel do whatever he wants, lets him turn and shove and place Style how he wants because at this point, this is all Fadel will give him. Here, Style is passive in spite of what he wants. But in the bedroom, Fadel is passive because it's what he wants; he wants to let Style do whatever he desires to and with Fadel's body. He wants to lay himself as bare as he possibly can, which is only physical, and so he does.
And because the encounter in Episode 3 lacked that emotional connection, the focus is merely their respective releases. There's a sense of two people trying to find pleasure and 'finish' while remaining emotionally disconnected despite actively having sex with each other. Because in some ways, they didn't really need each other in that moment to get there (there's actually a lot of truth in what Fadel says about it being easier to just jerk off alone). In sharp contrast, the scene in Episode 5 isn't focused on the destination but on the journey. Style is taking his time and Fadel is letting him - Style is choosing to worship Fadel's body, with his fingers, with his lips, to respond to his vulnerability with gentleness and tenderness and adoration. The goal has stopped being about finding a release, it's about allowing both these men to revel in the giving and receiving of pleasure.
The point of these scenes is to show to us the ways in which Fadel and Style have grown to care for and, dare I say it, love each other in ways that are so purposefully portrayed by showing the nature of their physical connection. Because the ways in which these scenes are the same and yet so wholly different showcases how their touches are now no longer merely tied to their senses any longer, but also to their hearts as well.
#when i say i am OBSESSED ugh T_T#what joongdunk did in episode 5 just makes me appreciate and anew how much they're intentionally changing things each time#there's such care taken to portraying the characters growth and change of feelings and we are so blessed to be able to experience it!#the heart killers#the heart killers the series#fadelstyle#stylefadel#joongdunk#joong archen#dunk natachai#thk ep 5#thk ep 3#thk meta#hui talks thk#hui talks thai bl#shoutout to all the gifmakers because this post wasn't nearly as impactful with stills#i do wish there was a better way to search for gifs though TwT#also i've never been a colour analysis girl (because i don't know enough about it; not because i'm not interested...#i mostly don't know where to start)#but wow the lighting feels very intentional too: the cold and clinical shades of blue indicating the emotional distance between them#vs the warm and soft red/orange glow surrounding style's bedroom scene#yeah everything about these scene was so beautifully done and i'm so grateful we get to see it TwT
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I think the two most obvious foils for Ludinus Da'leth across all of Critical Role are Essek and Keyleth, which is both fascinating given how different those two characters are from each other (Essek being a foil in terms of isolation, single-mindedness, harm in the name of ambition, knowledge, and other such wizard themes; Keyleth being a foil in terms of people who have lost something at a young age to the gods and bear resentment for it, political leadership, belief that the world belongs to mortalkind, and longevity) but also it's extremely funny that they both are the partners of Liam's character.
#i could write like a longer piece about it but that kind of sums it up#like. hm. how do i put it.#the thing about essek is like. he like ludinus made some IMMENSELY selfish and harmful choices#but the timeline was SHORT all things considered. ludinus didn't REALLY get going until hundreds of years post-calamity#and he expresses NO regret whereas the vibe with essek in 2x97 is that he's kind of hated himself ever since#and you know. maybe if someone had intervened with ludinus 400 years earlier he'd have done the same. but who would. does he have friends.#the thing about essek haters who aren't just angry shippers is that they all ascribe to ontological evil and yet don't ascribe it to ludinu#meanwhile keyleth is just like...the scope of her pain is somehow both smaller and larger#and yet she's able to see herself as part of a whole and not the center of the world#the fact that power and long life was much more naturally given or earned by her rather than seized is also i think part of it#but keyleth's speech this past episode in particular...it's a direct rebuttal of ludinus's dumb speech in 51#this can be your world without having to kill anyone if you're willing to work and grow and compromise and grieve#cr spoilers#critical role#ludinus da'leth#essek thelyss#keyleth
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merlin (immortal) giving arthur (pendragon) the only blade that could kill him
#they make me SICK#i hate them so much#if arthur had found out about his magic earlier and took it poorly…he’d be the only person able to kill him#merlin handing over the sword as a symbol of his utter trust in arthur#god imagine arthur finding out (au everyone lives) and being torn between wanting to cast the sword away but also wanting to keep it on him#he hates the weight of merlins life that now seems attached to the blade#he doesnt want it#but he cant cast it away bc what if someone gets their hands on it?? then merlins life is in their hands#he is BAFFLED that merlin would give HIM - uther pendragons son - the only thing that could kill him#he asks after days of fitful sleep and consideration and merlin is just like#‘its /you/ arthur.’ he says like its painfully obvious#NCJGSKSNSDIBSKSB TEYH MKAE ME VIOELTNT#bbc merlin#merlin emrys#arthur pendragon#excalibur#immortal merlin#merthur#im just thinking of percabeth when percy tells annabeth where his mortal point is and she is the ONLY person who knows#and she has to carry that tidbit of information around like its not the heaviest burden shes ever carried - more so than the sky#that one quote 'love is giving someone the power to destroy you but trusting them not to'#idk you get it#arthur and annabeth being the only people who can destroy the one they love#merlin and percy having unwavering trust and faith in their other half that they place their life in their hands#literally#sorry im done
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I LOVE WHEN I GET TO DRAW PONIES FOR WORK!!!!!!
#Rainbow dash is uh. A little dubious lookin. But that’s ok#been loving coloring things in all sketchy lately :3#Thought I wouldn’t be able to get these done on time but I did so yay!!!!!!!#mlp#mlp fim#mlp fanart#mane 6#squirrel art#rainbow dash#twilight sparkle#fluttershy#rarity#applejack#pinkie pie
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Lackadaisy Enrichment
#in our enclosures!!#video linked as source; which i'm glad to see already has a million views and is trending. That's Right#lackadaisy#WHICH i have been reading since at least '07 when i was thirteen my god b/c this animation is based on the ongoing webcomic#like does its influence show up Directly in some Discrete way i can point to in my art? not very easily probably. And Yet.#the inspiration....i wasn't able to be Regularly Only for at least another year / art done Nonprofessionally Online was novel to me#like wow ppl can make & post fanart of w/e they love huh....didn't know webcomics were a thing & i never really read that many since but.#good god the quality of Lackadaisy at its onset is like this is superb?? this person putting in all their talent and effort???#and Then you get years & years more art and i don't even know what superlatives to throw out abt its quality as it evolves. obsessed w/it..#if i see a new lackadaisy comic page i Will be acting out. obviously this animation is a delight & also stunning. and fascinating to also#juxtapose as a Translation / Interpretation of the comic in a different medium & standalone snippet of Story#and that we're not even quite there in the comic timeline; Taking Notes abt character info we get distilledly here....genuinely love like#take it back to '07 i'm like oh boy can't wait for the dream team to assemble. then a decade later when it did? Oh Boy. that is payoff lol#namely hooray for stitches and mudbug at the field office for every passing gangster. killing one marigold associate but not the other#which seems like a promising start to shootouts w/the other dream team triumvirate. i adore that in canon so far mordecai freckle & rocky#have met but only over a nice brunch. re: all intentions anyways. anyways i'm like Gifs Must Be Made while i'm also so riled afresh abt the#comic that i've been sooo hype for for over fifteen yrs now babeyyy Deservedly. i've done a couple of rereads & ought to do another....#For Interest it'd probably take a few sittings to catch up from the start but there is much to be engaged over....this ongoing story that's#historical fiction prohibition bootlegging cats with plenty of focus on characters & several Mysteries. which i'm better at parsing now lol#like one of the more recent rereads like Oh Of Course x (probably) accidentally killed his y & z took the fall & that's a binding secret...#Not [oh of course] abt the circumstances surrounding a's death & how b & c were involved. nor the ''what's marigold's damage'' mystery#which is great. love to not know things. love that we can readily follow all the emergent drama everyone's wading in nowadays. hell yeah#anyways admire my organized approach to gifs here. four shots each Expressions Atmosphere Action Groupshots#sure might've muddled through gifmaking for this anyways but fr being a huge lackadaisy comic enjoyer for now most of my life helps#and its very Overall Inspiration like. just really getting the [you can really just draw stuff out here] going. fr the art's detail & skill#and that enrichment like i'm gonna have a great time following this. And I Have#you don't expect a crowdfunded indie animation in the mix back then but hell yeah fellas#SIGH ok removing a 4th gif that's broken / not displayed despite reuploading then entirely remaking it. if it's a bug i'll try again later
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I made a few new wax seal stamps out of clay (like the ones I did for my worldbuilding stuff forever ago), this time just of random symbols that I thought might look good done in the style of painting over the raised part of the wax or etc. :0c Some of them aren't carved deep enough to really show up that well, but overall they worked okay for being clay lol
#wax seal#crafts#wax stamp#stationery#Window one is kind of stinky.. I was imagining like a swirly night sky sort of looking thing so it would be a surreal contrast of a night#sky with a window in the middle that shows a daytime sky - but the silver and purple wax kind of mixed too much together#with the black and it just looks very plain black and not all that starry or anything hjbhj.. Of course the eye is probably my favorite#since all I ever do is draw eyes and still like eye imagery for some reason. The four leaf clover is very lumpy and skrunkty but also it wa#the smallest in size out of all of them so was easier to do multiple stamps of just to try it out.#The heart with eyes wax is actually more swirly in person. I wanted it to be a mix of light pink and red and white. and the wax#did kind of all blend together but in person you can definitely see MORE of the intentional swirlyness. in this it just looks plain pink.#I was going to do one eye in the heart but it looked weird. but now two seems too plain. i could have done 3?? in a pattern.. hmm#alas. I wish I could make actual metal ones. With the clay i have to paint them in a thin layer of olive oil before stamping because#otherwise the wax just kind of gets stuck in the grooves of the clay and then you can't pull it up. Very wacky ''unprofessional'' looking#set up where I'm hot gluing circles of sculpey clay to short stumps of a wooden dowel that I sawed apart with a serrated bread knife#and then using an old paintbrush to put olive oil on them whilst holding a spoon over a yankee candle flame hjbjh#ANYWAY.. I think if I were middle class/rich/etc. this would be one of the main things in my crafting room is like.. SO many colors#of wax. and all different custom made stamps designed by me. which could be much more elaborate in actual metal.. muahaha.... >:)c#RHGghhh... I actually don't want to talk much about it since (this is probably just my Obsessed With My Own World Artist Delusions) I#think I have a really cool idea for a game that could genuinely be successful if i ever get to make it and I don't want to give#everything away and spoil the whole plot/concept in hopes that one day I can actually do it - BUT - a game that I'd like to make after the#visual novel I'm making now has partially to do with the main character working as a sort of writer/scribe/artist assistant in an elven#city (set in my world/with my worldbuilding species and versions of elves and etc) and I was thinking of maybe incorporating#somehow being able to collect little writing type items like these like.. you can get different wax seal patterns or pens or etc. when I do#stuff like this in Real Life it always makes me think of that like.. ouh... this is good research.. what it shall be like to be a littol#elf collecting wax seals and such.. indeed... GRR i need to be finished with my current game NOWWW... i MUST work on other#thingss... aughh... ANYWAY.. yay. accomplishment to do One Single Thing other than Sit In The Summer Heat And Rot#though also hilarious as this was the first cool-ish day that was below 80F in a while hgvh#waking up like 'wow.. i actually feel okay today?? like I could do things?? how mysterious.. I wonder why..?? :0'' Its The Weather You Fool#Tis Always The Weather
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so many tips for budgeting/being frugal are just twice as hard when you have a disability
"meal plan!" idk if i'll be feeling well enough to cook every day so it's hard to plan for what to eat
"cook in advance!" i can't cook meals for a whole week at once and plus i can't count on that because again idk if ill feel okay to cook at the same time every week
"use cloth napkins and towels!" those need to be washed and folded, i already have trouble doing my laundry
"delivery is expensive, always shop in person!" going to the grocery store can wipe me out for the day.
"base your food shopping on whats on sale that week!" one, allergies are a thing and some people don't have that luxury, two, that's a lot that you have to prep for and that takes energy.
"DIY!" takes time and energy. maybe i could do it by myself but would it be worth all the time i need to take to recover?
i mean none of these are bad ideas or trying to exclude people. most of it is cutting out conveniences. but for disabled people, something that's a convenience for someone can be a necessity to others
#i pay someone to mow my lawn#it's so expensive and i hate it#and i probably could mow the lawn#but i'm often in pain and idk when that's gonna be and i might get behind#another chore to add to my list of endless chores i'm behind on#and i know im fucking lazy and need to do more#i'm trying so hard#i want to be able to clean my room and make my bed and wash the dishes#i eant all these things to get done#but i sit on the couch and i don't do them#i just need to push myself to get them done
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Howdy My Beloved
(I’m so down bad for him it’s horrifying)
LMAOOO mostly mutual howdy love
speaking of howdy iv been seein cowboy/Wild West aus for welcome home and I decided to dip my toes in it a lil while I was hyper KXHDGDH
cw poorly drawn guns and messy sketches
I was just gunna make Home a sheriff’s buildin’, but I thought it would be cooler if he was a big bad spooki
also howdy’s lil bugdega is both a convenient store and a restaurant/bar (same building, all shopping stuff at the front while the restaurant is in the back) howdy can make a mean beef n cheddar KDHHFH
#Welcome home#welcome home howdy#welcome home wally#welcome home barnaby#welcome home home#howdy pillar#wally darling#barnaby b beagle#yeehaw#Also Funfact#Iv been gettin a lot of people asking me how I draw so much in such lil time#It happened last year and now this year JDHDHDJ#But I have a thing where if I get extremely hyper focused on something I basically draw-stim#It’s a huge itch that I gotta draw SOMETHING#And if I don’t it plagues me#Up side to it I consistently post like twice a day with multiple doodles and I don’t get bored by it#Downside I wanna play monster hunter so bAD BUT MY BRAIN WONT L E T M E#Thankfully my sketching has gotten a lot faster throughout the years so I’m able to put all my dum lil ideas down#And still have time to play games I wanna play and get stuff done
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i have this fic series i'm still working on where mihawk sort of becomes rayleigh's kid and spends ages 11-17ish on the oro jackson.
shanks and buggy imprint on him (bugs considers him a sort of older brother figure/sparring inspiration and shanks has a crush that eventually turns into full-blown love) and this is how i imagine they're like on the day mihawk sets off on his own haha.
#fic recs#dracule mihawk#akataka#mishanks#buggy#buggy the clown#shanks#akagami no shanks#red haired shanks#one piece#one piece fanart#op fanart#clearly my workaround to 'i should be working on my deadlines instead of doodling mishanks' is to finger-draw on my phone instead#on the plus side i'll never be tempted to go and fully render what was supposed to be a sketch#on the minus side i'm wondering if drawing with my finger takes up the same amount of time anyways.........#smh#anyways in this au i have this part planned where after shankd and buggy get into a fight over the chop chop#shanks comes crying to mihawk all devastated and annoyed and mihawk who is 16 and absolutely doesnt want to deal with a crying 12 year old#decides to fix things himself by showing buggy the pros of his devil fruit via forceful and incredibly harrowing sparring session LOL.#makes him see right away how much of a boon it is to never be able to get cut by a blade. it turns into an actually fun sesh#'cuz mihawk starts enjoying the challenge and the creativity and control and buggy starts wielding his knives in flying hands.#ends with mihawk berating him on how he treats his brother and how mihawk never wants to have to deal with shanks like that again#and also lowkey encouraging buggy by saying he's a resourceful kid and he's got people if he cant do things himself.#at this point in time shanks kind of wants mihawk to be his knight in shining armour so he's happy to hear what mihawk did#but mihawk is Fully Over bunking with two 12 year olds. ray please can he just set out on his own now. he's done it before. come on.#he is not a babysitter!!!!!!#tho these fics will focus mostly on hawk & ray jsyk#i digress
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