#I wanna quit so so so bad

[ranger-kellyn]

maybe one day i’ll get the courage to quit this shitty fucking job and figure SOMETHING out. until then 🫠

[starry-bi-sky]

mmmmmm read a disciple shen yuan/shizun luo binghe fanfic about two days ago where the first chapter was the Immortal Conference arc, and SQQ was the one who had to be pushed into the abyss (he was still the villain) except Luo Binghe was refusing and was like, lowkey losing his mind about SQQ being so close to the edge. SQQ ended up having to be the one to fall in himself because of the system's punishment system. The rest of the fic is leading up to that moment. But like, MMM i've been obsessively thinking about that first chapter for DAYS ever since.

now i've been in svsss for a grand total of *checks watch* a week. but god obsessed with that. I want to write/read a fic where disciple SQQ goes a little nuts down there. Like keep all of the things that make SQQ, SQQ, but just. Throw in a little bit more trauma in there. A little bit of a mental break. Let him go a little nuts as a treat. Just a tad unhinged. I wanna see him go, just a little, "god fuck it, i've tried so hard to change this shitty story's outcome and it feels like everything i've done has been for nothing. I'm going to die in this world no matter what I do, I've been doomed from the start, so might as well die the way I want to." and he just, breaks a little! Under all the stress.

He still retains the traits that makes shen yuan, shen yuan, like his overwhelming kindness. But he's just! yk. A little less patient. Paranoid. Jumpy. Colder. A little more aloof and closed off. A little more Shen Jiu. He's no asshole child abuser, but he was a Number One Hater in his past life and he's leaning into that old habit a little more now.

(On a totally coincidental not-at-all related note, there's not enough SJ-and-SY-are-the-same-people fics out there that i've found. This is totally unrelated...)

The Endless Abyss turns the mind into an over-sharpened blade, and SQQ is both fascinated and perhaps a little excited to explore a place that doesn't have a lot of info on it in the mortal realm, but still terrified out of his mind. And he's no Luo Binghe, he doesn't have the sheer brute strength and power to just bulldoze his way through, so he has to be a lot more sneaky and cunning if he wants to survive.

The fic itself role-swapped LBH and SQQ so that SQQ was the half-demon (which lowkey fucks) and LBH the human, but I'm equally-if-not-more obsessed with the idea that LBH remains the half-heavenly demon and SQQ the human. If only because I keep thinking about SQQ befriending some demons (particularly and specifically a group of succubi) and they grow very attached to this Human Cultivator so through magic plot stuff they create some kind of seal/illusion/talisman that makes SQQ appear as a demon because a human cultivator in the endless abyss may as well be the equivalent of putting a giant neon target on your back.

And iirc Shen Jiu was taught demonic cultivation by that one guy(?? i've only been here a week so im not caught up in ALL of the lore yet) so that could totally happen here.

(On the other end of the realms, poor Shizun Luo Binghe is just. losing his fucking mind over losing his most precious and beloved disciple. About .5 seconds from burning down the peaks himself. somebody sedate him.)

The Endless Abyss sucks and SQQ is having a really terrible time and can feel himself going lowkey mad, but also holy shit look at all this WORLD-BUILDING. look at all this flora and fauna, and oh if he had the equipment for it he'd be writing all of this down. ALL OF IT. He was kinda-sorta-already planning on never leaving the Abyss as some sort of fucked up self-exile and self-preservation thing, but now he might? actually just?? never leave if he can help it, like he lowkey likes it down here.

anyways the next time anyone ever sees SQQ again he's got hair so long its almost touching the ground and he's either in rags and half-feral or he's been completely dolled up by his adoptive succubi sisters and still about three seconds from biting anyone who tries to touch him. (he's also lowkey trying to book it back down to the abyss even if he has desperately missed all of his friends and shizun)

[bunnyboy-juice]

NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???

[silusvesuius]

testing out drawing maormer 🪸🐚🪸 and a nelvas 🧣📜🩷 i'll ramble about maormer a bit in the tags

[hastalavistarbaby]

✨SHE✨

[chrissdollie]

chris "dont touch ur pussy shes mine" sturniolo

[azure-clockwork]

I love three houses discourse because I'm pretty sure everyone just picks their route based on which house leader they're the most gay for and then tries to defend their pick by pointing out the other sides's war crimes via twitter memes. Reader, all four of them do substantial quantities of war crimes. So many. We're just here because the woman with Issues and a big fuck-off axe said so, and then we gotta justify everything she did in the name of dismantling the class system. I mean, I'm here for that, but you could also try justifying Charm Man uses poison and perfidy to try to stop racism, A Sad Little Meow Meow gives no quarter instead of doing therapy, or the Thicc Pope tries to bring back her mom via human experimentation, depending on your tastes

[wowieeitsisa]

I love DrRetro, Pest and Bive as a trio SO MUCH guys

PEST is an individual who clearly doesn’t want to deepen his relationship with the people of the elevator (biggest example being Poob, who tries TOO MUCH). But there’s DrRetro, dialogue between her and Pest imply they are closer, and quite know each other from BEFORE (they is canon facts that DrRetro have busted Pest out of prison!). PEST IS MORE LOOSE WITH THE WAY HE TALKS WITH HER, IT’S SO SPECIAL TO ME

Bive might not be as canon awesomeness as I like to think. But in a moment where Pest needed someone to LISTEN about some ‘dream parasite’ he immediately came to her… he recognized her as an actual detective!!!!!!!!!! Canon information that Bive also doesn’t trust Pest, BUT UPON A COMMON ENEMY THEY GO AGAINST IT TOGETHER RAHAHEHHEGFHG

MY BELOVED DREAM PARASITE INVESTIGATORS TRIO YOU’LL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS 2 ME

[sh1-n0bu]

everyday i look at the hoyoverse fandom and go “wow… media literacy IS dead😃”

[sunsetcdiscs]

Grr.. i love discussions about the normalization of bad things for teenagers/ kids, whether it be fictional or real. Esp as someone who has had that happen 2 me

And i think it's smth that's very prevalent in ctommy's story.

C!tommy is chaotic on his own, so in a way he already had violence somewhat normalized? And I think all these little things add up to how he later treats his relationships w others, and specifically what actions he's willing to let others get away with.

There are, ofc, Loads of things that later normalize violence even more (wars, all the conflicts in general). But in my opinion, one of the biggest things that normalizes violence that is Specifically Towards c!tommy, was the fight in the pit w c!techno. C!techno beat c!tommy to a pulp, all the while c!wilbur was cheering and egging him on in the back.

Then ofc exile rolls around, and c!dream literally hits him w an axe right in the first vod. But that's okay, it's not like violence is Unusual, right? He goes through that week not questioning every time c!dream hits him, only questioning why he has to give up his stuff (<- this is smth that's never really talked about when ppl discuss ctommy's sentimentality for objects ? When rewatching the exile vods, i genuinely don't think there was a moment where ctommy went "hey, why are u hitting me?" it was always just "hey, why are u taking the stuff that I worked hard for?").

And then he runs away but ends up living with Mr. " ''minor'' terrorism". Can you see how that really wouldn't be good for c!tommy? Then when they go to l'manburg, it Allll piles up and c!tommy ends up hurting c!fundy and c!connor.

I've seen ppl before say that they ignore this lore moment bc it doesn't make sense, but to me it makes So much sense? Ofc a teenager who is constantly and consistently surrounded by a violent environment/people is going to be influenced by it? Ntm ppl say that they love c!tommy bc he's an imperfect character, and is this not a big part of what makes him imperfect?

One of the biggest reasons Why c!tommy left c!techno was because he realized it was further normalizing violence. Because he realized that He didn't want to be violent anymore

("Techno, if this is what I've become, then I don't wanna be me anymore, man."

"I'm worse than everyone I've hated- I'm worse than everyone I didn't wanna be *looks at cdream*").

C!tommy's talk with c!connor at the end of the community house destruction stream will always be So important to me

("For what it's worth, Tommy, I don't know what went on today, but- Even though you kidnapped me and I'm still kinda dealing with a bit of the trauma, I think that at the end of the day; you're just a conflicted person, not a bad person." SCREAMING VRYING THEOING UPP)

And a convo that's even More important to me, is the one w c!sapnap near the start of the doomsday stream, where c!tommy acknowledges that what he did was Bad, and that it was because of influence from the environment around him

("Sapnap, I'm so sorry, that you did that, and that I made you do that because.. it wasn't right of me. And I-I shouldn't... I shouldn't take out.. ANY of the fucked up shit thats happened to me o- on other people, and I'm sorry." AUGHHHHHHH CTOMNYYY VTOMYYY AJAN)

[lyrring]

Hi friends!

This is a very exciting step for me--I've decided to start a Patreon! My dream rn is to get to place where I feel more comfortable scaling back and eventually leaving my current job (a far off goal for certain).

This will give me the opportunity and the motivation to center art more in my life. Any support would mean the world to me! Even just rbing. <3

Starting in March there will be two fan art polls a month-> one sfw and one... not. LOL. I also am going to shift to devoting more time and energy to comics, the full releases of which will be limited to Patreon for the foreseeable future.

Okay thank you for your attention hehe.

CHECK IT OUT!!! MWAH.

[synthaphone]

i feel like maybe nobody really cares about the really minuscule neopet customization art errors, but something about how they'd be really easy to fix makes me feel nuts. like there's more important oversights to prioritize for sure, like the polkadot ogrin having No fill color, or the stealthy acara missing its antennae altogether. but you just need to tweak some of the colors for that disco blumaroo... and it's vector art, so you just have to select a new color for those elements! it took me way longer to slowly trace over everything myself in photoshop than it would take someone with access to the official asset.

[actualbird]

the thing nobody tells u about smoking is that it is horrifically easy to get addicted to it because the effects of nicotine act like a snooze button for most unpleasant bodily signals/sensations. hunger? cigarette can get rid of that. anxiety and negative emotional state? cigarette can get rid of that. sleepiness? cigarette can get rid of that. anything else in the body that in general does not feel great? cigarette can get rid of that. for around 15 minutes total. but once those 15 minutes are over, you can just have another cigarette. and another after that. and keep hitting the snooze button on things that are markers of your body or mind Needing Attention. cigarette lets you go "lemme deal with that later" over and over again until Later eventually and inevitably comes and by that point you feel like walking DEATH because you snoozed all the internal signals for so long. but hey. you know what could get rid of that death feeling for around 15 minutes? another cigarette-

[skrunksthatwunk]

something he can't put into words.

[somegrumpynerd]

This day has been a series of slaps to the face so I will be aggressively imagining skeletons having a good time in my little cage until tomorrow morning, this will be different to what I normally do here in no way, thank you

[tetzoro]

eeep !! good morning friendz and happy happy monday ! it’s a brand new day !!! and a brand new week !! i’m waving my lil wand and spreading a lil magic in hopes that everyone has a good one ^_^ ♥︎