#I mean of course they're very different in some aspects

[anerdynerd]

Detroit:BH x Twin Peaks, anyone?

The portrait at the top right is supposed to be the actual Agent Cooper, the rest belongs to a silly crossover AU I made because I started Twin Peaks recently and Cooper reminded me of Connor too much not to do this :]

[unproduciblesmackdown]

thinking about how of course billions is about people trapped in eternal battle world, and trapped because they won't ever exit, and don't want to because that's the only way they can define their idea of themself or like move through life, to the degree they have to just create or find another battle if one ends or they don't have enough going on at once or they're unhappy about anything & can only respond to that the only way they'll respond to anything: finding someone to consider a target to Defeat & being like nice, i'm so competent & active as a person, so with any other issues in my life, i'm sure it's not my fault at least

and it's been clear that to be someone at the Center of the show means needing to be inflexible enough to never leave that life, which also probably means never engaging in genuine self-reflection besides like, fuming in distress for 5 sec & then immediately searching for blame for someone else, or calling up your designated moral supporter who'll tell you you're upset b/c you're very complex & sympathetic & maybe if you do [xyz] you'll be able to Keep Winning, so like, don't worry, we'll never get too off track here. you have someone like connerty who cares so much about playing by the rules ft. ethics, but he was also someone completely inflexible who would give a shit like "ha ha you broke the law" and be Defeated b/c like yeah damn you do got him in that situation. he may then have gained the flexibility to throw a punch when he's already imprisoned but he's still just gotta retire & pursue some completely different goals

this in contrast with like, what a coincidence (surely not) that the more flexible characters are the ones who also do introspect & reflect & genuinely think about & question themselves ever, & how even beyond that, being in this world of people who overwhelmingly are thee opposite & aiming for a static sense of self & thus strategy for navigating life & all interactions & situations, the more reflective parties also tend to accept both Blame & the fruitlessness of pushing for more/different/better from the people & relationships & situations they're amongst. those willing to take on responsibility at all surrounded by people casting all of it off, always, w/the former already primed to take blame & the latter primed to be looking to find the blame in anyone else, a powerful mismatch....which allows the flexible parties to also put up with shit for longer lol like if they got fed up that quickly or recognized the dead-end here they'd just leave the show lol. like wow can't believe taylor spent their whole life already stuck having to deal with someone who's so very much like these bullshit central men & those trying to emulate them, & perhaps also then have a lifetime of experience extending endless patience & sympathy with little to no expectations for more from people who put up with such a bullshit man & his effects on everything around him, like, what do you mean taylor's mom hasn't seen them b/c douglas didn't want to see them b/c he wasn't yet motivated enough to have to exercise begrudging shows of basic respect. whilest sure seems like taylor felt more concern & basically stated their responsibility re: trying to make their relationship with their dad work / basically take on the task of making his life work for him according to his sense of himself (genius! who deserves the recognition thusly!) and doesn't seem to take on this role re: their mom, who nevertheless is just presumed to move closer to them along w/douglas. and here's taylor never truly putting their foot down re: wendy, no matter what, able to have no real positive expectations in how wendy treats them or thinks of them, but also always able to extend sympathy / decent treatment themself

thinking of like team ben out here as the Nicer axe cap or mpc people who also happen to be people absorbing the L's, blaming themselves for being at the bottom of the hierarchy & being subjected to the always negative treatment doled out to them accordingly, and, winstonesquely, still generally like extending genuine gestures of amicability, efforts of constructive actual communication, etc, & this being shut down & likely punished by all the people around them who won't handle that kind of thing. that Of Course nobody's actually supported around here, like, at best they'll get some kind of "well you're actually talented & valuable :)...." (so why aren't they already treated in a way such that they're aware of this?) "....so just have more confidence already god!" wherein (a) again that just means it's Their Fault that they're having a miserable time at the hands of others & (b) their having "confidence" doesn't really mean like, an emotional buffer between their sense of self-esteem & the message of inferiority in how they're treated, it has to mean externally acting different in some ways, more like A Winner, more like everyone else. the limits of ben trying to sometimes be a buffer for tuk as that kind of friend/mentor role, where either it simply fails or ben's Help is more unilateral "correction." that generally only any increase in aggressive hostility gets them anywhere, and really not that far.

the way dollar bill could always act however he wanted & they could always clean up his messes / save him from himself / just flatout blame other people for what dollar bill did to them or someone else; success in being a mini axe in that way for sure. dollar bill going off the rails over his literal dollar bill & that's not a problem, he's validated b/c he's upset, & b/c rudy knew he'd be upset it's really all rudy's fault....who just so happens to be more of a loser, what with his glasses & possible masturbation ever and all. whilest even when dollar bill is like every season being shit at his job & life, well, just find a loser to trounce while everyone ignores this, cheers you on, takes on responsibility for fixing things for you, blames the person targeted probably. dollar bill couldn't even do in office transphobic hate crime physical attacks, or that but while yelling the r word at the autistic guy he's already harrassing & threatening, without it being really basically the target's fault, & hey, as long as no investors are watching. and we're still dragging dollar bill back to the office b/c uhhh yeah!!

& then of course there's winston, who, like a loser, says things in real efforts for real communication with others, that they winningly can only bring themselves to respond to as "he's not allowed to talk, that's out of line, i have to punish/deny this to reassert our respective status" except for, sometimes, taylor actually communicating in turn, or even simply receiving the information. winston in a duo with the very winning & worthy rian, being something of a quasirival for 5 seconds but even during then, and since, trying to be amicable to establish an actually positive dynamic, trying for actual communication, engaging flexibly & actively based on her feedback & her terms & etc to try to find some more success; versus rian completely inflexible, unwilling to respond to efforts to communicate, unwilling to have an actual relationship with any flexibility & genuineness in turn, or see winston as a person of course, and engage with real emotions. which is hardly an exclusive response of hers, like, everyone else is just the same, she's just also the one interacting with him more often and personally bullying him & standing next to him & immediately responding with clear contempt when he tries things like earnest expressions of "hey rian could you not do what you just did b/c it makes me feel like shit, probably b/c that's what you're trying to do" and "hey that was cool what you just did b/c it makes me feel like—" b/c like, what a loser. real winners cannot handle engaging with another person as a person. when you can just make up & stick to a narrative about "oh but i don't hate winston, who i feel is inherently beneath me. i wouldn't wanna feel bad about killing him, not when i could feel fine about administering more of a death by a thousand cuts with some other people helping out & hey maybe it was their cut that did it after all....but also if you're like 'pwease' then eh sure" or that winston's got a lesser inner existence anyways, some classic dehumanization, no complexity there, & hurting him isn't real, & it'd never be you in his position anyways! especially the more you're buying into "yeah i'm more of a person / more deserving / more real & sympathetic & correct than him :)" & being cheered on as you act that out. pretty cringe of winston to be earnest, flexible, openly trying & wanting & needing things, sounds bad & silly. unlike the winners around him who really cannot handle him or any of these things about him. of course near equivalent in loserness, tuk, is the person with the realest most amicable relationship with him. both of them too incompetent to realize their mutual failings in this, ha ha, real winners are repulsed & fleeing & can't handle a basic exchange with either of them. and the imbalance re: how little others are willing to give them in interest, consideration, time, words, etc, while they're always trying Too Much re: the disinterested others, totally proves their unworthiness

winston and tuk always having to stay at the bottom of the hierarchy, winston only able to be shitted on even as he extricates himself, ending up surrounded by people who will only act "correctly" according to their superior roles & this mf wags only processing anything as "did that reinforce my being a correct/winning person???" & only responding by trying to reassert to others how much of a winner they are, which requires establishing a loser, and crushing them. winston having recognized / gotten fed up with a bullshit scenario & had realistic expectations of those around them & spent those years being treated like shit yet never crushing an enemy to restore his ego & also spent those years trying to communicate and work with others and share actual info and make actual connections & now independently choosing to make a big shift in his life so that things can be different? is definitely the contemptible loser here while everyone else looks very good faffing around for an episode getting some temporary ego boosts & being very "correct" in every response to winston, even pointing out that rian even noticing something genuine & positive from winston in the absence of it anywhere is first & foremost incorrect, which rian will Also immediately drop in the face of that "well yeah it's more correct to prioritize Anything else. like that he's pathetic & mpc 5ever" like wuh oh rian being doomed from 5x08 "time to embrace acting more correct now" & being truly inflexible from that point on, never had a moment of conflict not resolved by [ignoring that] &/or again just getting someone more correct to declare how it'll be answered. taylor at their most flexible and Taylorest and most juxtaposed with central men & static ossified "winners" when they are also at their best in engaging with winston. taylor Like winston & vice versa in so many substantial & interesting ways, despite their relating to / sympathizing with / devoting much more effort & interest to people more like the central men. that here we are, when taylor might have to give up on Being A Winner, someone who'll walk away with status & resources & a seamless transition into some established business foundation, to really get the wins that matter, against pince, &/or to clock out of a sunk cost factory, &/or to not have strangled every part of themself that can be in conflict with this general situation into eternal dormancy. don't You dare blame latency lol, the taylor who gets to exist outside the conditional "well i guess you're a winner who's very useful to me, like dumping work on you & blaming you if it goes awry. and you can act like a Real winner in the ways that really matter (crushing people)"....is also a taylor who can be rejected & shut down & shut out & have their value denied & be treated shittily despite even knowing they'd be / are good at this shit, superlatively even, & could never feel okay just being regarded as a tool stashed away at someone's disposal. & Has been treated shittly & is liable to accept blame, unilateral responsibility for other's selves & feelings & actions & lives, & marinate in self-loathing. while people who refuse any introspection, questioning, responsibility, awareness, etc, & refuse to handle the least of genuine interactions/relationships with others as real people, are glad to scoff at them & dismiss them & imply or assert their superiority, like, wow have You got a lot to learn, or maybe you can't b/c you're inherently inferior. all just like re: winston!

tl;dr shoutout to the flexible characters who like can & do reflect & change things up actually, just so happening to always be Losing for this in the [only way to win is not to play] arena of fake winners seeing if they can consider themselves superior to everyone else & only even possibly correct always & forever, in the pyramid scheme of social hierarchy & also capitalism

[bunni-v1]

your shadow milk cookie relationships headcanons are now my canon. like what the fuck how can a piece of literature be so accurate to established information we know about him!!!!!!! hejsjsdjejwje ur shadowmilk is so loving and so cute lowkey

if you don't mind, since your requests are open, could you elaborate more on some more aspects of the relationship pre-ep 8 and post-ep 8? (if u haven't finished this part then u can just ignore this hehe) you mentioned how smc naturally gets more and more devoted as time goes on and he opens up (THEY MAKE ME FEEL SO ILL) so i've also wondered how he would act like when there is a threat that legitimately puts his lover in danger, or at worst, sets the tone to losing them. he'd mald, i imagine...

feel free to answer, feel free to ignore—i adore your work and i think it's not strange at all for you to shift to cookie run after dabbling in mostly human-ish games like ZZZ and TWST. all in good fun, plus you're feeding a parched audience (i am audience, haha) have a good day!

🍓Okay so this ask kinda has three parts to it, so please excuse me if it seems a little... all over the place. I'll answer both the pre and post ep 8 things, and then I'll be touching on what he's like with the threat. I do hope you enjoy my love <3

Tw: Mentions of body horror (cookie body horror?); Shadow Milk Cookie; Obsessive and Possessive behaviors; unedited

Info: Shadow Milk x Reader; Fluff; Angst (lowkey tho); Pre and Post episode 8 SMC (spoilers ahead lol); Drabble/Headcannons(?)

Pre Episode 8

From how the story seems to be set up, the confrontation with SMC should happen last, they just released it now because of the anniversary knowing he'd be hella popular lol. So I'm functioning with the idea that Gingerbrave and Co. arrive around when the other Ancients are finishing up their own confrontation with their respective beasts, meaning there's a lot of time to work with hehe.

Anyway, pre-episode 8 Shadow Milk leans into the category of 'yandere' a lot more than post. He's very obsessive about you, again stalking and watching you, learning as much as he can about you before he even allows you to see him.

You're more often than not being monitored by him, and if you're not, he's probably with you. He gets annoyed when other cookies talk to you, and he isn't afraid to voice that. While he does give you a lot of freedom, he does subtly limit the things you do and the people you're around. It's harder when you're not with him in the spire, but he goes about messing with the environment to keep you where he wants you.

And, yes, he'll crumble cookies in your name if he needs to. Their lives are arbitrary in the grand scheme of things, especially so if they're causing you strife. He won't hurt any cookies you hold dear to you -- though he really may want to at times -- only cookies that are a threat to your emotional or physical well-being. If the death causes you too much terror, then he'll tone it down to just... making their lives a miserable hellscape. It's what the deserve for hurting you, of course!

When you do join him in the spire (because you will, it's just a matter of how long it takes him to nudge you in that direction), the behavior is a bit more obvious. He doesn't like you leaving the spire for literally anything, and if you do he knows and will pop up by your side the second you stray too far. He plays it up as cute worrying, but he's legitimately scared for your wellbeing, like terrified. You're never alone in the spire if he can help it (and he can).

Like I said he watches a lot. There are eyes all around the spire and they follow you shamelessly. They appear content to just watch you, sometimes even literally forming hearts, so they're no threat to your well-being. Again, he's just observing you, more excited now that you're actually in the spire and close to him.

There is a notable difference in the environment, though you likely don't notice it (because you've only ever seen post you moving in). The atmosphere surrounding the spire is lighter, more colorful, and happy. It reflects his excitement at having you around, a visual nod to his love for you, even though you're not exactly away of it.

Despite the negatives here, there are positives! He's incredibly doting, you'll want for nothing with him. Your greatest dreams will come true with a wave of his hand, even with only half his power. He does let you wander around, you just won't be alone when you do so. He's very aware of the dangerous environment on beast yeast, he's cause for it, so he won't be risking your safety.

He's incredibly showy with his style of loving. Grand gifts and performances just to get you grinning and giggling. (He loves writing plays where the two of you are the main characters, falling in love in a million different ways, cutie he is.) He serenades you with syrupy sweet lyrics all about how much he adores all of you. Scoops you up in his arms and dances around with you. He's very touchy, like I said, always needing to have physical contact for whatever reason. (It's because he's scared you'll leave him too.)

He doesn't kiss you much if only to initiate more intimate activities. When he does, his intent is to fluster you nearly every time. Kissing is something that's hard for him, for whatever reason. It's more intimate than touches, and weirdly enough more intimate than sex in his mind. It makes him so vulnerable, so he tries to avoid it unless it's to get a reaction out of you.

Most of what he does is to get a reaction, actually. He likes seeing the way you express yourself, and regardless of what you do, he finds it cute. It's a little intimidating how much he stares, and he stares a lot. Very frequently you'll find him sitting around just... watching you. He won't stop even if you acknowledge it, just smiles all innocently until you go back to what you were doing.

That's sort of how it feels during this whole time, that he's just watching from the outside. There's a distance he keeps between you and him, the power dynamic is a lot more stark here. However, when you're not aware - be that you're sleeping or doing something where you can't see him - genuine affection comes out.

Floating around the spire in his arms as you rest, he whispers sweet nothings he could never bring himself to say to your face. He'll lead you around the winding halls of the spire with a path of your favorite flowers, aiding you in getting to where you want to go. He leaves gifts around, taking you on little treasure hunts just to reveal something sweet and heartfelt at the end. The spire itself shifts and changes around you to be more to your liking, and there are rooms within it dedicated to the hobbies you enjoy.

This gentleness is all hidden when you're together, though. Only showing itself when you can't look him in the eyes and reject him. He can't bring himself to let you in, he's scared of that rejection. He wants you to think he's powerful and amazing, so allowing you to see just how much he adores you would be terrible. What if you don't like him at his weakest? What if you realize that you could do better than him? What if you meet Pure Vanilla and you realize how much better he is? What if you leave him? Oh, it tears him apart.

So, he can't let you in. He'll put on a performance so dazzling it'll distract you from how much his heart aches when he sees you. He'll prove that he really does love you through flowery words and fantastical shows, anything to hide how much he adores you. Even when you try to get him to connect, he'll brush it off for fear of you not accepting him as he is. He can't handle you rejecting him, not after all he's done to keep you at his side, not after how hard he's fallen in love with you.

Post Episode 8

This is where we see Shadow Milk Cookie open up a lot more to you. After the so-called betrayal of Truthless Recluse, and his being incredibly emotionally vulnerable from Compassionate Pure Vanilla's offer for friendship, he's now forced with the problem of you knowing him. You saw that raw vulnerability, the loneliness that aches deep within his dough and infects his very being with a sickness he cannot cure.

No matter how much he puts on airs, he cannot avoid you knowing him now. He has nothing to hide behind anymore, you saw how much he craves connection and care, there's no going back from that. He briefly considers leaving you, but the idea of losing you sends shivers up his back, so he dismisses the thought as quickly as it comes. He may actively avoid you for a little while, but if you are patient and kind to him, he won't be able to hide for long.

Showing him that you still feel the same way by continuing your regular shows of affection is a huge relief to him. He truly expects you to think less of him now that you've seen that side of him, but you don't. It's rather odd to a cookie like him, who spent his entire existence being worshiped, revered, and feared. He assumes when you see him weak you will despise him - that you were only there for all the grandiose gifts and displays. He doesn't consider the thought that you have fallen in love with him. That you consider him yours as much as he considers you his.

It takes him a bit, but he begins to pick up where you left off. This time, though, he's more... gentle about everything. You get to take the lead around this time, and as odd as it is for him, it's cathartic to be taken care of for once. He can let his walls down and relax while you stroke his hair and hold him close to your chest. You kiss across his face with reverence that not even the most loyal of his followers could ever begin to replicate.

You love him.

He becomes addicted to the feeling, your affections being something he craves with a hunger he'd never felt before. It takes a bit for him to come to you for it, so usually you'll have to initiate it, but he melts into your hands so easily. It's pathetic how much hold a little cookie like you had over a god like him, but when you're humming sweet words at him he can't bring himself to care too much. (He will huff and puff if any of the other beasts give him shit for it, telling them off like a angry child.)

All of those hidden affections of his become much more obvious to you as time goes on. He's a bit awkward with it because he's never really been so open with any cookie before, but it's charming the way he tries so hard to be genuine with you.

You get to hear those sweet words of love from him directly, earnestly said while he holds your hand in an iron-tight grip. He gives you those heartfelt gifts by hand, telling you all about how he worked so hard to get it for you and how much care went into it. He leads you around places himself, preferring to be by your side than guiding you from a safe distance. Even the way he holds you is different, much more adoring than before. It's a kind of care he hadn't really shown you before, more considerate of what you might want rather than what he believes you might want.

And, of course, he kisses you now. Very frequently. He still does do it to fluster you at times, but less than he did before. Now every kiss has a purpose behind it, a means of displaying his affection for you. They're soft and loving, full of emotion.

Something that carries over consistently is the watching. He keeps an eye on you at all times, regardless of where you're at. Since you're no longer in the spire, there's more risk so he wants to ensure your safety. Even if you're with another beast or with Black Sapphire or Candy Apple, he's watching you anxiously.

Now if you acknowledge the eyes, they'll react to you. Before they usually just continued watching, but now they'll squint and shift excitedly at your attention. Sometimes he'll even drop flowers or a little plushie at your feet while the eye seems to grin at you with glee. You can kiss them, if you'd like -- they're warm and soft but they don't feel like eyes. If you do so the pupil with dart around nervously, then it'll pop out of existence and arrange itself to another spot you can't easily fluster him at.

Still, though, they just watch you for the most part. Making sure you're safe and happy when he isn't around. He's a bit less obsessive about who you're spending your time with, though. He trusts that you won't leave him a lot more now, and no longer finds himself threatened by anyone (other than PV).

Bonus below

Now, as a mortal cookie in beast yeast, most things put you in danger. It's a tough environment to live in, and there are a lot of violent characters around that wouldn't care if you died or not. However, most cookies are aware of Shadow Milk Cookie's, shall we say, claim on you.

There are very few things that could actually threaten you, especially with Shadow Milk Cookie monitoring you so closely. He makes the environment around you safer, and he makes sure everyone knows that you are off-limits. Unfortunately he cannot control everything, though he really does try to.

If anything, anything ever puts you in actual danger, he is beside himself with worry and rage. Your soft and sweet dough is not made for battle and danger, regardless of what you might feel. It would take the witches themselves to stop him from tearing apart the lands to ensure your safety. And tear them apart he would. He would carve deep valleys into the ground for you, slice mountains to their base, and raze forests flat if it means you will be safe.

If it's a cookie? Some insignificant act or protest from a foolish mortal, deciding to use you to get his attention? Oh, they'll know hell.

Depending on how much damage they do the punishment will vary, but it won't be pleasant regardless. If they just take you away for a little while, he'll torture them. Ensuring the life they go back to is much harder for them to live through, but he won't kill them. They have to learn their lesson and live to tell the tale so no one is stupid enough to follow their example.

If they hurt you at all, they're dead. Shadow Milk normally makes a show out of any crumbling he does, but when you are involved? He doesn't waste time with any silly shows, they just crumble. No fanfare, no sparkle, just death. They don't deserve anything more than that, not when they've caused you hurt.

Ah, and if there is a threat to you -- silly or not -- he takes it very seriously. His monitoring will increase tenfold, and he does his best to keep you with him at all times. He will not take your safety lightly, not when he adores you so.

If there is a genuine threat to your life, he will do everything in his power to remove it. After the fact, he becomes much more obsessive of your safety. It's almost suffocating for a while, but if you express concern he'll ease up a bit. Though you can feel the anxiety in his body language and the way which he speaks.

[why-animals-do-the-thing]

Sorry if you've already covered this, but I was scrolling socials and saw that the San Antonio zoo got a large donation to expand their savanna habitat. The only thing that jarred me as I read through their expansion plans was apparently they're going to be outfitting some 'safari' vehicles so guests can be taken into the habitat to feed and interact with the animals (from within the vehicle). I was always under the impression that this kind of interaction wasn't necessarily good for either the humans or the animals-- is there a way it can be done ethically?? Anyway, I just thought it was interesting!

Ooo, okay, your question aligned with a thing I've been chewing on for a while, so let's talk ~ethics~ and ~philosophy~ aka this is gonna be a bit long. I do promise I'll answer your question, though!

The first thing I want to note is that you're really asking about two different things, which are almost always conflated these days when it comes to talking about animals: welfare (is the animal happy / healthy / safe) and ethics (is what's happening good / moral / acceptable). It's really important that we distinguish between the two, because welfare is an objective measure of physical and mental wellbeing, and ethics are a human construct that involves subjective interpretation.

A useful but highly oversimplified example of this is the bothering of cats for online videos. Pestering a cat to get a funny reaction once in a while may not impact their overall welfare. Welfare is the cumulative impact of an animal's experiences, which means that single acute moments may not weight heavily on the entire balance. If the cat is healthy, fed well, enriched, and has a good and positive bond with their humans, those momentary irritations for videos might not matter much. That doesn't mean that you or I, as viewers, might not still find bothering an animal for internet clout ethical. We can believe that humans shouldn't ever unnecessarily put their pet through negative experiences, and we can think that doing so just because it brings the human money or fame is distasteful. But! We have to recognize that as used in this example, those ethical stances aren't inherently tied to the animal's welfare state. Many people I know who dislike cat-bothering don't care if the animal has good welfare outside of that situation - they don't like that the situation occurs at all, ever.

So, back to your question. You're wanting to know if it's okay for a zoo to have a drive-through aspect of an exhibit where people get to feed the animals. You're asking if it's safe for the humans and for the animals (which is a welfare question) and if that type of interaction is ethical. I could just tell you that of course it's fine, San Antonio is an AZA zoo and their accreditation only allows them to do "good things" but that's now how it works here (nor is it the reality of accreditation).

The safety aspect is one I'm not worried about. It's actually a pretty common thing for reputable facilities to do some sort of vehicle tour in savanna habitats, whether in the guest's vehicle (safari parks) or on a hay-ride type vehicle (zoos). Many of those allow guests to feed out specific parts of their animals' diets. Offhand, I know Tampa and Fossil Rim both have feeding tours like this in a staff-driven vehicle. It's not specified from the zoo's press release, but I can guarantee you that guests will not be driving those vehicles - which means the interactions will be proctored by staff and what people are feeding out will be carefully regulated. The habitat is going to have rhino, giraffe, zebra, ostrich, and antelope/gazelle, and I'd guess that the drive-through is going to stick to those latter two and maybe additional species. Those are animals where a car is an appropriate safety barrier.

As to if it's ethical to do? It's spiny question, because it depends very directly on the ethical perspectives of the person you're asking. I think it's fine - you may not. Let's break down the different things that come into consideration on the ethical side, and my responses:

"The zoo is commercially exploiting animals by letting people pay to get closer." If the issue is that people paying to get closer to animals is using them for money, well, that's the business model of a zoo (non-profit or not, they still need revenue to operate). So IMHO it's not like it's "less ethical" than anything else the zoo is doing, using that framing.

"Zoo animals should be allowed to be wild and undisturbed by guests driving in their habitats." Zoo animals aren't wild, and their entire lives revolve around humans and the human work schedule. As long as a vehicle entering the habitat doesn't have a negative welfare impact (e.g. they're not scared of it), it's not very different from the rest of the routine of managed care.

"Feeding zoo animals will encourage people to try to feed wild animals." Thanks to obnoxiously viral content creators, people are going to try to feed wild animals no matter what. Doing it in a proctored situation where a staff member can try to do some education at the same time is probably the best possible scenario.

"People just do those tours to get close to cool animals." People are always going to want to touch the animals. If being able to pay for a tour keeps them from jumping the fence to try to pet a rhino, great.

There's one more that I want to talk about separately, because I think it's where a lot of confusion gets generated. It's this idea that "Humans shouldn't be interacting with animals at all, any interaction is unethical and bad for the animals." This is a welfare crossover, but not one actually informed by welfare science in a captive situation. And I think it's because the internet lacks nuance. Yes, it is absolutely correct to say that with wild animals, you should never ever try to feed a deer out of your car (or similar). It is incredibly harmful to those animals on both an acute and chronic timeline. But thanks to the rage-bait algorithms on social media and people endlessly justifying doing stupid, dangerous, bad things (and getting pushback for it), there's been a lot of bleed between the public's understanding of what wild animal welfare is and what captive animal welfare is. Combine that with the reality that captive animal welfare cannot be assessed or diagnosed from a single context-less clip, and that people with strong beliefs and no practical experience with the field/species/individual will pass judgement loudly to their audiences...

The result is almost a reflexive believe in many sectors of the internet that any human-animal interaction that isn't couched as a "rescue" is inherently unethical, for reasons people often can't articulate. Which is why, I think, so often people want to support certain aspects of captive animal management but feel guilty for doing so. I see this a lot in the questions the blogs gets, and I'm glad people feel comfortable asking, because it's important to think through not just the individual instances but the patterns leading us to question them.

So yes, I'd say that a staff-led experience in a vehicle chosen for safety is an ethical way to proctor an interaction between guests and certain savanna species. It will vary by facility - I'm always more wary about guests driving, although many drive-through safaris are fine - and by setup. I think what San Antonio is doing will be fine, though, and will be interested to see / hear about the setup when they start up.

If you've got a question about ethical captive management, I'm always happy to talk about it - but I'd invite you to poke around in your head a little and send me not just your question in the ask, but your thinking about why or why not something might be concerning. It's great practice for understanding why you relate to animal ethics the way you do, and where those beliefs come from.

[harmoonix]

🍄 Retro - Astro 🍄

(Astrology Observations)

ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯

🍄 - I love to stare in the eyes of the natives with Neptune - Asc aspects, most of my friends have such aspects and they truly have beautiful eyes

🍄 - Pluto in Sagittarius Generation is really meant to give and normalize things back to normal, and for example bringing things that were used in the past and to normalize them again

🍄 - Wanna know why so many Aquarius Suns may act so different and unique? Sun is ruled by Leo and Aquarius is its opposite sign so sun acts different in Aquarius

🍄 - Neptune and Mercury aspects can indicate love for music and most times for old music or old music style, you know liking those songs from the 90's

🍄 - One fast way to learn your sign houses in your birth chart is to know the order of the zodiac signs, this method worked with me for example you have Gemini Rising and Leo Sun > Your sun will be in the 3rd house because Leo is 1 sign (Cancer) apart from Gemini

🍄 - 8°, 20° degrees on the Midheaven attract jealousy really fast, envy too and sometimes can even get hate without a reason, on the other hand people can become obsessed with them

🍄 - Sagittarius in your 4th/12th house axis can come from more nationalities/ethnicity/race like having more than 1 background country ancestry (or your ancestors/family members)

🍄 - Lilith in your 9th/12th or 4th house can indicate ancestors or family members working with the occult/witchcraft/magic/tarot etc...

🍄 - Sun in the 12th house natives have an ongoing karma, basically they are working on their karma constantly

🍄 - Virgo Moon's beauty is underatted, they are so beautiful and they can actually look younger because of the Mercury's youth effect

🍄 - I remember once checking on google about Jupiter in Virgo husband (my sidereal Jupiter placement) and I got this:

I can't tell if this is real or not tbh 😭😭

🍄 - Neptune aspecting Chiron will literally empower your subconscious with a lot of intuition, spirituality like you really have the chance to heal your subconscious in case is hurt with those placements

🍄 - Everyone I know with Cancer Placements gets so DEPRESSED based on the weather, and omg I'm not joking or something if the weather outside is bad they're gonna be depressed or in a bad mood

🍄 - Every time I see someones chart with 10th house placements especially Sun and Venus there I know they got the cash bag 💰💰

🍄 - Not gonna lie knowing how organized Virgo placements are, I think natives with Virgo in the 4th house have the most most most most most most organized house-castle ever just like in Cinderella and everything looking perfect

🍄 - You can spot health problems in a chart by looking at their 6th house sign (both in tropcial and sidereal) looking at the ruler/lord of the 6th house and of course the planets (if there are) in the 6H house

🍄 - Stelliums play a very big role in a chart (A stellium is when you have 3 or more than 3 planets in a house) and indicates a big focus in that area

🍄 - Empty houses play a very big role as well, and an empty house is not a bad thing or something but spirituality talking it indicates an area you already completed in your past life

🍄 - Let me tell you how tricky Venus in Capricorn can be to make you fall in love with matured enough people and sometimes the karma comes and strikes and says "They're not the one for you"

🍄 - Moon in the 9th house is another tricky placement to have because in harsh aspects it can indicate a religious trauma and sometimes it can indicate love for religion/beliefs you understand what I mean...😭😭

🍄 - A lot of people who happens to get betrayed have Pluto/Saturn Lilith and sometimes Neptune in the 11th house, (I know all the people can get betrayed but these are just some indicators

🍄 - Sagittarius/Jupiter in the 11th house can be blessed with friends or in general having luck with their friendships and social networks, sometimes their friends can come from a different background than them

🍄 - Mercury at 10°, 22° degrees really can have a deeper voice than others (depends on aspects) but their voice is so damn attractive

🍄 - Uranus and Lilith in the 5th house can get confused if they will want or not to have kids like is difficult and in the same time draining for them (Lilith in general in that house natives don't want kids but is just my thoughts on it)

🍄 - Sagittarius Midheaven/Midheaven in the 9th house or in Sagittarius Degrees 9°, 21° really need to chose something the job/career they're passionate about because it grants them luck

🍄 - Midheaven at Aries Degrees 1°, 13°, 25° or MC in Aries have a big chance to get a leader position at their job or having the main character energy

🍄 - I tell you Gemini Moons and Moon in the 3rd house natives have the best tea ("Tea" as a gen z slang means gossip) like gossips stories i honestly wonder from where or who they know so many things im so invested y'all 😭😍

🍄 - 2nd house and the Moon Sign represent food in the birth chart, and I know water/earth ones love sweets so much

🍄 - If you want to know more about your true self check your Ascendant ruler persona chart, AND if you have 2 planets rulers check both persona charts for ex if you are Scorpio Risings check your Mars and Pluto persona charts, sadly for Leo Risings their natal chart is pretty much their true self (There is no Sun persona chart😭)

🍄 - Leo in the 7th house can have the same problem like your natal chart pretty much tells you about your future spouse because there is no Sun persona chart to look for in case you wanna look for your 7th house ruler persona chart 😭

🍄 - Cancer Risings in your D9 (vedic) chart can indicate a nurturing spouse or in general your partner has a very nurturing and kind energy

🍄 - I admire 6th house Placements for how much they want to keep themselves healthy like is a top priority and i respect that so much, because your health matters so much in life ♥️♥️♥️🙌🏼

🍄 - Aries Placements especially Aries Juno I love their energy. They just give that leader and confident/powerful vibe (boss vibe) in the chart also someone very bold and funny I love them

🍄 - Draconic Chart is the chart of your soul before reincarnation/coming to earth and the placements are indicating how your soul expected to be on earth (like their life), and im gonna cry I have Saturn in the 7th house in this chart as well. my soul knew I will have to wait for that specific person to come 😭 I'm done...

🍄 - Mercury in the 11th house makes socially open natives they get along so good with most people because of their social skills, they're also smart, creative and very open minded too

🍄 - Pluto in the 12th house has a chance to become very powerful in this life because this placement usually indicates an painful karma, you will certainly experience a lot of good and bad things in your current life

💝 This post was more like at a spiritual level 💝

Be blessed you all who read my observations 💝

ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯ྉ☯

[marsprincess889]

VEDIC ASTRO OBSERVATIONS

Part 3

More random and messy but still true

DISCLAIMER: if you consider some of these positive and others negative, then I want you guys to know that they come from my personal observations of real life. None of the nakshatras are better or worse, or positive or negative, these are just aspects of them, but nevertheless, true.

Magha people can have such an ego omg like I've said that before with rat yonis but P.Phalguni I think is nowhere near Magha in that department. Ashwini can also come off as egotistical, but it's moreso that they're unintentionally(or sometimes, intentionally) ignorant. Mula can also have egotistical tendencies, esp cause the galactic center(the black hole) is in Mula nakshatra, so they can have this "I'm the center of the world" attitude, but in my experience it manifests as just them mainly trusting themselves. All Ketu nakshatras have this theme of going inwards and shutting the world out, but since Magha is in the Sun ruled Leo (sun=ourselves, confidence) it can come off as undeservedely egotistical, different from Ashwinis aggressively(Aries/Mars) ignorant and Mula's relentlessly preachy(Sagittarius/Jupiter).

The Ashlesha to Jyeshta pipeline is actually very obvious, they're more connected than people realize. Obviously they're both Mercury nakshatras, but Ashlesha is often seen in a very sensual, feminine light and Jyeshta in a no-nonsense, cut to the chase light. The difference is that all that bottled up energy of Ashlesha, that was either healing or poisoning the native is ready to fight and be more direct in Jyeshta. They're both laser focused on survival and protecting themselves, desperately trying to realize themselves in the proccess, so it's a struggle. Both are trying to preserve their energy, but Ashlesha was trapped in the confines of the 4th house(family, roots,mother) and the sign of Cancer/Moon(emotions, fliudity, sensitivity), either for its safety or to its detriment, and was trying to get their energy out in a correct way. Jyeshta is out in the open, thrown in the sign of Scorpio/the 8th house/ passive Mars (transformation, rebirth, purging, sex, death, warfare, survival, defence. You and the other are one and the same in the 8th house). For Jyeshta, the only way to survive, is to win over everyone else, and when they eventually win, they gain dominion over others. So Jyeshta is kind of about revisiting that Ashlesha state and having the revenge, so to speak, because after gaining strength on your own, you eventually have to face the ones who you were so desperately trying to get away from(ashlesha).

Mulas can be so gentle and honestly at first I did not know where that came from, but since the last third of nakshatras are about transcending and mastering their ruling planet in a sense(btw, that does not mean that they embody the energy of the planet more, or that they're better) and Ketu is about primal instincts, then Mula is the place where the individual centers themselves in their truth and is unmoved by others, thus, avoiding unnecessary energy drainage. Of course, they can also be the most untamed of all, but in our civilized(mostly🙁) society, their natural demeanor is extremely calm.

Chitra natives are soooooo chaotic like calm down jesus. It makes sense when your consider that its gunas are TTT(tamas, tamas, tamas). Among the planets, Ketu is the most tamasic one(Chitra's ruler_Mars is also tamasic), but each nakshatra has their own guna(Ashwini is Rajas x3, Bharani is Rajas-Rajas-Tamas, Revati is Sattva x3, you get it). So Chitra people are the most chaotic, if I may say so. (Gotta credit The Hidden Octave's Chitra video for the observation). There are a lot of indicators that explain this but I've already written a lot in the previous ones😭 if you know basic vedic, this observation is of no surprise to you. They can also be prone to anxiety, but often they're unaware of it, so that has a detrimental effect on people around them.

Uttara Bhadrapadas are VERY hard to order around. Impossible even. Idk why someone would want to order someone else around but nevertheless, these natives can deal with any kind of unfairness with such grace, self-mastery and quiet strength that eventually nothing gets to them anymore. So if you see an U. Bhadra child disobey their superiors calmly and in a controlled but determined manner, you know why.

I really have a lot of respect for Uttara Ashadas(not all, lmao), because they just deal with stuff alone. And it's natural for them, and they don't do it for a goal(like in Jyeshta, which is not bad, it's just different) or for attention, it's just a way of life for them. Simplicity and stoicism 🤌

Okay, now a fun one: Moon girls (Rohini, Hasta and Shravana) are the blueprints of Y/N. If you guys don't know what Y/N please look it up. Not just Y/N, but characters like Bella Swan(hasta moon, rohini asc actress) and Elena Gilbert(shravana moon anctress) come to mind. Even popular instagram users who parody those movies/fanfics/characters have moon placements(@laframbuesaa_ rohini moon if i remember correctly and @yasmine_sahid_ shravana moon(?) on insta). Even Harry fcking styles, who is probably the most common love interest in those fanfics has hasta moon. If you know a little about nakshatras, this makes sooo much sense. Moon is something that masses can understand and digest easily, so it's not complicated and sometimes, it can verge on delusions(or an insane sensitivity and receptivity and the ability to read between the lines, but that's just for a number of their natives). Other nakshatras that can fall into the Y/N trope are venus and ketu nakshatras, but moon is the most classic example of it.

I want confirmation in the comments/reblogs for this one: Bharani natives love high fantasy, history(esp medieval), fantasy in general and/or just everything/anything with that vibe. Cause I'm bharani moon and I do, and I've seen some other examples. If not, then the Bharani natives themselves seem like they're out of those times/stories. I can't explain it in any other way. (This might be true for Bharani Ketu too.)

Alright, this is all. Reblog, comment, like. Interact please

Take care

[zukosdualdao]

so, this post was originally born from a post i saw a couple of months ago that was deriding people for criticizing katara’s main role in lok being a healer when that was never all she wanted to do but liking the scene where she heals zuko in sozin's comet. at the time i thought about responding directly and decided against it, but i have since scanned through transcripts of every instance (i could find; it's possible i could be missing something) of katara healing someone in the show and how they respond. (you know, like a normal and well-adjusted individual. lmao.)

anyway, aside from katara explicitly stating that she doesn’t only want to be a healer, another aspect of why people don’t like that this is how her story goes in lok is because of the way healing is treated in the atla narrative.

Katara: Aang, you're burned! Let me help you. [Katara heals the burn on Aang's arm.] Aang: Wow, that's good water. Sokka: When did you learn that? Katara: I guess I always knew. Sokka: [Sarcastically.] Oh ... Well then thanks for all the first aid over the years. Like when I fell into the greaseberry bramble. [Angrily.] Or that time I had two fishhooks in my thumb!

this comes, of course, after aang accidentally burns katara and she learns she can heal through her waterbending by healing her own hands. then (after comforting aang despite being the one who got hurt, not that i'm bitter), she heals aang after he gets burned in his fight with zhao. and like... there's not so much as a cursory thanks in this scene.

to be clear, because i can already hear some responses in my head and i am making a preemptive strike: i'm not saying that when other characters don't thank katara for her healing, they're like, the worst people ever for not doing so or there aren't other ways at different times where they show their appreciation. what i am saying is that it feels like this sets up a long pattern of katara's healing specifically being taken for granted, and it makes me especially uncomfortable when i see her healing as a sort of metaphorical parallel to the emotional labor often expected of her in the show, especially because this and being The Avatar's Girlfriend/Wife is more or less what she's relegated to in post-canon.

also, i have to note sokka's line here. i don't want to come down on him too hard for this, because it's obviously being written humorously (and does genuinely make me laugh, for what it's worth, if just for the inherent ridiculous nature of two fishhooks), but his sarcastically saying thanks for all the help over the years when katara says she always knew (which is supposed to be her saying it just somehow instinctively came to her) does feel like another mark in this pattern. but i also really read this as sokka trying to lighten the mood after a Difficult (TM) day, so i cut both him and the writers some slack for it.

Meanwhile, back at the Outer Wall, Katara attempts to heal a member of the Terra Team. General Sung: What's wrong with him? He doesn't look injured. Katara: His chi is blocked. [Stops healing.] Who did this to you?

i find it interesting that katara has sort of naturally fallen into a token team healer role, to the degree that we don't even see them ask for her help or her agree to it; it's just automatically assumed that she will. and i mean, on the one hand, it's fairly standard to have an Assumed Healer in a fantasy action setting like this, where people will get hurt in combat and therefore the narrative needs someone whose job is to help them. the problem for me is that the show kicked up such a fuss about how women shouldn't just be allowed to be healers, and yet it's still the role no one but katara ever fills. aang is also a waterbender! why couldn't she have taught him healing, too? i genuinely think it would have added a lot to the story, but katara is The Girl (TM), so healing is what she (and only she) does, what's expected of her, and again, with very rare thanks for it.

Katara stares open-mouthed at Jet, her hands hovering near her mouth in shock. Snapping out of it, she withdraws water from her water skin, with which she covers her hands, and it begins to glow as she kneels down next to him. Cut to a shot from over her shoulder, with Jet glancing at her while she rubs her hands over his chest in an attempt to heal him. After rubbing his chest three times, the glow fades, the water stains Jet's clothing, and Katara looks back over her shoulder toward the rest of the group. Katara: This isn't good. Smellerbee: You guys go and find Appa. We'll take care of Jet. Katara: We're not going to leave you. Longshot: There's no time. Just go. We'll take care of him. He's our leader. They stare at Longshot in surprise. Jet: Don't worry, Katara. I'll be fine. [Smiles a little.]

Cut to a closer shot of Katara placing Aang's body on Appa. Katara opens the vial around her neck and uses water healing on Aang's wounded back. The rest of Team Avatar, Kuei, and Bosco all look sadly and in anticipation. The glowing from the spirit water stops, and Katara starts crying, assuming that it was not enough to save Aang. Aang's tattoos glow for a second and Aang groans. Katara, overcome with joy that Aang is alive, looks at him, who smiles a little, and she holds him closer.

writing about these together because i have less to say about them. i'm definitely not going to fault jet for not thanking katara when she tries to heal him as he literally lay dying, or aang for not having the mind to do so after she brings him back. but i am still going to fault the narrative for putting her in a position where healing is just inherently expected from her and yet very rarely allowing her to feel the emotional toll of that or to feel constricted by it. and when she does struggle against the weight of it (not necessarily of being a healer, but of being expected to be kind and good and uncomplicated with no room for other aspects of her identity, which are very tangled up in why she is The Healer) in episodes like the runaway or in the southern raiders, she just... does not receive a lot of support from the people she should be most able to rely on.

Katara: Maybe we should go upstairs. [Helping Aang up.] You need a healing session. Back in Aang's room on the ship. Katara bends some water onto the scar left by Azula's lightning attack. Katara: Tell me where the pain feels most intense. Aang: Mmm, a little higher. Uhhh! Aang briefly flashes back to the battle at Old Ba Sing Se where he rose into the Avatar State, then back to reality. Aang: Wow, you're definitely in the right area there.

not much to say here, it's just another instance where it would have been so easy to slip one thank you in, and the writers just... do not. the reason i think it bothers me so much with aang specifically is because katara is supposed to be both aang's physical healer and his emotional crutch in a way that she's not written as being for, say, toph or sokka. he's sometimes shown appreciation for her emotional support, but he still comes to rely on and expect it in ways that do not always feel healthy, and knowing that, it bothers me that he shows even less appreciation for her healing, because it's just what katara is there for.

A figure resembling the Painted Lady glides over the water on a carpet of fog and enters the village. She steps into a hut where several people are sleeping on the floor, and bends over each of them in turn, healing them with a blue glow. Her last patient is the mother of the little boy seen earlier, her son sleeping at her side. He wakes as the Painted Lady turns to go and silently follows her out the door. Little boy: Thank you, Painted Lady.

this is a genuinely sweet scene in which katara does receive appreciation and genuine thanks for her healing, but i think it's also worth noting that katara is not being recognized as herself here. still, i am genuinely very glad that it's included in the episode because (again, unless i am missing something) it is the first time katara gets thanked for her healing.

The scene cuts to show Appa landing on the edge of the battlefield. Sokka and Katara help Hakoda onto the ground, and Katara starts trying to heal him. Katara: How does that feel, Dad? Hakoda: Ah, a little, better. I need, to get back to the troops. [Attempts to stand but is too weak to.] Ahh! Katara: You're hurt, badly. You can't fight anymore. Hakoda: Everyone's counting on me to lead this mission Katara, I won't let them down. [Attempts to stand again but can't.] Ahh! Sokka: Can't you heal him any faster?

they're in a high intensity situation, and sokka is Stressed because hakoda is supposed to lead the mission, so i, like, Get It, but "can't you heal him any faster?" does strike me as another moment in which katara's healing is being taken for granted. i think it's something that would bother me a lot less if this was an isolated incident in the writing, but *gestures vaguely at whole post*.

Sokka: [Brightening.] Dad! [Rising and approaching the two.] You're on your feet again. Hakoda: [Sitting down; somewhat weakly.] Thanks to your sister.

that being said, in the next hakoda and katara scene, there is this very sweet moment, where hakoda might not be thanking katara directly but is showing a lot of appreciation and admiration for her skill in healing (and though she's not in the dialogue i included, she's around to hear it, which makes me happy.)

Katara: It's gonna take a while for your feet to get better. [Stops healing.] I wish I could have worked on them sooner. Toph: Yeah, me too.

once again, i'm not gonna fault toph for wishing katara could have healed her feet sooner, because she's been in pain all night, but the writers could have very easily (as they could have in any of these scenes!) chosen to include a perfunctory 'thanks' here, and they just didn't. i know this is getting repetitive, but i swear it's because it's largely more me being mad at the writers than the characters, lmao.

there are also a couple of scenes in which katara doesn't heal anyone, but her healing gets brought up by aang.

Aang: He doesn't look sick. You okay, buddy? [Appa groans and Aang pulls out Appa's purple tongue.] His tongue is purple! That can't be good. Katara, can you heal him?

to be fair, aang asks here, and it's not like aang gets defensive or angry when katara says appa needs medicine (and also to be fair, appa's not even actually sick, lmao, katara's being slightly trickstery), but it's another instance where katara is automatically positioned as the person who is and should be responsible for healing.

Aang: [Chuckles.] Well, not over over. I mean there's always Katara and a little Spirit Water action, [Turns to Katara.] am I right? Katara: Actually, I used it all up after Azula shot you. Aang: [Disappointed.] Oh.

i actually don't mind this so much as a writing moment, as i think it's a lot more intentional wrt aang not always conceptualizing the reality of the violence he’s facing. still, it’s another instance of katara’s ability to heal and care for him being taken for granted, and i find it especially notable it’s in of the last significant moments they share together (the other being an argument as katara urges him not to run away from the reality of their situation with ozai) before they spend the rest of the finale separate until they’re kissing without a word at the end.

and then there is the zutara healing scene, where katara heals zuko after he interferes and takes azula’s lightning to the chest when she’s aiming for katara.

Cut to Katara as she rolls Zuko on to his back and begins healing him. Zuko opens his eyes, feeling the pain lessen, and smiles weakly at Katara, who smiles back as she sheds a tear.

Zuko: Thank you, Katara.

Katara: I think I'm the one who should be thanking you.

it seems fair to me to say that one of the reasons the motifs of healing in the zutara are dynamic are so appreciated by their fans is because of how it contrasts to a lot of moments where the work katara does with her healing is under-appreciated. for one thing, it happens as part of a mutual exchange—katara heals zuko after he gets hurt saving her. (this also somewhat calls back to their scenes together in the crystal caves in the tcod, where she offers to heal his scar after they are trapped together and zuko extends her empathy.) it’s based in reciprocity. it’s also, as shown here, one of the few moments of explicit, heartfelt appreciation and thanks given for katara’s healing.

[heartlilith]

Difficult Placements in the Natal Chart

*Difficult: defined as "not easy; needing effort or skill to do or to understand" 

I'm going to be discussing what placements I believe are more difficult to have in a natal chart. I just want to emphasize that this is my opinion (Tamra Judge voice) . Let's remember that all placements have their pros and cons, you are not defined by a few unfavorable placements. Of course, aspects and orbs matter... Chiron with 3 squares to your personal planets will be more difficult to handle than if you had Chiron trine Sun and Venus, for example.

One last thing: Difficult placements can be the ones with the most value. They teach you things, make you stronger, and they can make you an inspiration to people dealing with similar situations. Difficult placements have their positives too, which we will discuss.

🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿

Sun conjunct Chiron: These natives go through a lot of pain, physically and emotionally. They go through many trials and have to learn how to heal again and again. I feel like the universe puts them through a lot so that one day they can help others, which is nice but damn. This aspect can easily make someone slip into addiction, depression, and bitterness if the energy isn't channeled correctly. These people are prone to psychic attacks that lead to chronic illness, specifically migraines.

Positives: Can become a healer, can help other people through their problems, can become an inspiration, selfless character.

Sun square/opposite Neptune: These natives struggle when it comes to their fragile ego. They are deeply sensitive and feel things intensely. They absorb energies meaning if they're around negative people, they themselves will become negative as well. It's so important for these people to be surrounded by positive and successful individuals. Sun square/opposite Neptune is also easily manipulated and taken advantage of since they tend to see the world through rose-colored glasses. Throughout life, this placement can make an individual feel unworthy and inferior which can lead to a victim mentality that's hard to break. Watch out for escapist behavior because these people are prone to addiction.

Positives: These people are very psychic and should work on their spiritual abilities. Becoming religious or spiritual can be very beneficial for them. They have the most impressive imagination and are super creative.

Capricorn Moon: I've noticed that people with Capricorn as their moon sign have difficulties with being vulnerable and asking for help. They are the people that hold their family and friends together - they are the strong one. Oftentimes, they become responsible too early in life, which probably cut their childhood short if they had one at all. Their sense of responsibility is their strength but its also a weakness; they don't want to be thought of as "weak" or "needy" so they hold their feelings in. Like Pisces, when their emotions come on strong they need an escape, Capricorns rely on work and their sense of duty. They are prone to becoming workaholics and will ignore painful situations by working all the time.

Positives: Likely to become successful career-wise, very driven and ambitious, people trust them, they make great friends because you can rely on these people.

Aquarius Moon: Similar to Capricorn, Aquarius Moons struggle with their emotions and how to express them. Their emotions might not even be felt in some cases. They look at things intellectually and in a detached way; they think "Should I be sad about this?" or "Am I supposed to be angry?". Growing up, they probably didn't have someone that they could emotionally confide in or even worse, they could've been punished for showing their emotions. I've noticed a lot of Aquarius Moons have a detached sense of family, they could've been adopted or they just feel "different", they could even look at themselves as the black sheep.

Positives: Can come up with creative solutions to problems, a great friend, nonjudgemental and open minded when it comes to others and their life experiences.

Moon square Pluto: This placement could've been the victim of abuse, especially from their mother. Their mothers could have struggled with mental illness and unfortunately these natives could've been the scapegoat and received the backend. Their mothers could be careless one second and the next they could become obsessive; the obsessiveness usually shows when the native leaves home and creates space between them. This leads to distrust in people, women especially. Moon square Pluto people cling onto any sense of control because they grew up in utter chaos. Unfortunately, these people can deem self destructiveness as "normal" since it was what they knew throughout their whole childhood.

Positives: If these people conquer the negative traits brought on by this aspect, they could become great psychiatrists or therapists. These people are devoted and loyal.

Moon square Saturn: This placement could've struggled with feeling unsafe in childhood; like they couldn't count on their parents. Their mothers were less affectionate than normal and they didn't receive the comfort that they needed, which leads them to being uncomfortable with affection in adulthood. They probably went through some tough changes in childhood which is why they loathe change as an adult. This placement could've felt like they had to parent their parent, specifically their mother. And their mothers could've vented to them about problems that they had no business hearing, cutting their childhood short. Their mothers could go to them for advice a lot of times. They could've felt like a burden growing up, usually an emotional burden but more likely a financial burden.

Positives: Strives to become successful, these people are independent and self sufficient.

Virgo Venus: Virgo Venus isn't too bad but can make a native struggle with self esteem issues. I put this on my list because these people attract lovers that need fixing. Venus in Virgo love to fix people and make them "better". The people they're trying to fix could be toxic and destructive; the "bad boys/girls". But having their partner in focus and ignoring their own needs makes them resentful after awhile. I've noticed this placement attracts creeps and stalkers as well because they have a vibe of innocence and purity. In love, they can grow to be very demanding and make their partners feel inadequate in the process. They also get the ick quite easily, meaning its easy to turn them off.

Positives: Is reliable in love, a lady in the streets freak in the sheets type, definitely someone you want to bring home to your family, will take care of you.

Venus in the 8th house: Venus in the 8th house natives tend to be possessive and jealous in love. It's not that they view their partners as property (they can but this placement alone doesn't indicate that imo), they are just extremely loyal and expect their partner to be as well. From my experience, Venus in the 8th house people are ready to give it all up for someone they love. They want to merge and become one with their partner. Their intensity comes from a good place but once a relationships ends, it can be very very painful for them. Love and relationships trigger transformations for these people and sometimes triggers transformations in their partners. They come out of relationships a stronger and better version of themselves but this is usually achieved through heartache. This placement also has a real fear of abandonment and will stay in toxic relationships for this reason.

Positives: Loyal and devoted in love, is a ride or die person. They are very alluring and magnetic. Not easily forgotten.

Venus in the 12th house: I believe these natives are too good for the world. I say this because, like 8th house Venus, they are ready to give it all up for love. Venus in the 12th house is self sacrificial to a fault, oftentimes neglecting themselves in relationships. Love can bring subconscious pain to the forefront, attracting lovers that make them face hidden problems they hold within themselves. Venus being in the house of the hidden, it's not uncommon for these individuals to be the "other woman/man" or be in secret relationships for whatever reason. They can be easily manipulated and taken advantage of since they're hopeless romantics. This can lead to them having to regulate how much love they have for someone; they'll hold back their feelings and needs in fear of being naive and walked on.

Positives: They love people genuinely and whole heartedly, they see the best in their partners, they form deep connections in love.

Venus square/opposite Saturn: These natives may have grown up in an environment that lacked physical affection. This creates a person that is uncomfortable in love and becomes very regulated with how they express their emotions. They may be inherently insecure when they're young which creates doubt around being loved; they're prone to thoughts like "why would anyone love me?" which then creates trust issues. These people also struggle with self-love, they have feelings of inadequacy and compare themselves to others a lot. Since they have low self esteem, they often attract partners that treat them badly and the worst part is they think they deserve it. These people aren't fans of PDA or physical touch and often express love through gift giving or acts of service.

Positives: Self sufficient, usually has a "glow up" later in life, once this placement is conquered (could be the second half of life) they are unstoppable and have so much love for themselves.

Mars in 4th, 8th, 12th house: Mars doesn't feel very comfortable in water houses, this is especially true if the native has a lot of squares and oppositions to their Mars or water house lord. Mars ignites the emotional watery nature of the houses which can lead to sudden outbursts. Mars in the 4th house natives could have dealt with a prominent mother who dominated the household (4th house). This could indicate that a father figure was absent or estranged. Either that, or his role was weak compared to the mothers. Mars in the 4th house could also signify an aggressive mother and hostile home environment. Mars in the 8th house natives experience extreme emotions a lot of the time, this can include anger, obsession, and jealousy. Since Mars is in the 8th house of transformations, you can expect these people to go through many many painful changes in their life because Mars here speeds things up. These natives are prone to accidents involving vehicles, tools, gym equipment, etc. so watch out for transits! Mars in the 12th house could suppress their martian traits; sexuality, motivation and anger... or it could be the opposite, they could become addicted to sex and have a wicked temper, depending on the sign and aspects. Trauma related to sexuality and the inability to stick up for oneself could be prevalent here as well, or they could be downright violent towards others. These people can either lack motivation or become extremely restless. They also probably have crazy vivid dreams and aggressive hidden enemies.

Side Note: Mars in water houses can either be horrible or not so bad, it really depends on the rest of the chart. I included this because the negatives can be extreme.

Mars square/opposite Pluto: These natives usually had a childhood filled with violence and witnessed a lot of strong emotional outbursts. This makes the native think that reacting aggressively or even violently is normal. They could've been abused by their peers, siblings or parents. As they grow up, physical violence, fights, and anger issues could arise. They can get offended really easily and people just assume they're picking fights. Has a lot of physical energy that can manifest as aggression.

Positives: If they channel their energy correctly, they could become talented athletes. Has enough energy to meet their goals and then some.

Saturn in the 1st house: These people have had it hard since childhood. These natives struggle to be comfortable within themselves due to being surrounded by critical people and even being bullied growing up. The judgmental voices they grew up listening to becomes the voice within. They could struggle with body dysmorphia and have deep rooted insecurities. They are confused within themselves and their insecurity could make them miss a lot of great opportunities.

Positives: These people often have a deep sense of responsibility and can be very successful in their career, depending on the rest of the chart.

Saturn in the 7th house: Saturn, the planet of restriction and blockages, sitting on the 7th house of partnerships can make a native go through a lot of trial and error when it comes to one on one relationships. These people could be shy and fear intimacy due to their self esteem especially when they're young. Since Saturn is very karmic in nature, these people could attract toxic relationships or partners that don't fit well with them in order to learn necessary lessons. These people should be careful of going into business with people and also should be careful of divorce settlements (sign that prenup!)

Positives: After Saturn return, these natives will finally meet an adequate partner and since the universe put them through trial and error, they'll be ready for it. Has meaningful life long friendships.

Chiron opposite ASC/Chiron in the 7th house: These peoples' lessons come in the form of lovers. Betrayal, deceit, heartbreak, and infidelity can make their way into these natives lives. It doesn't have to be those themes although it can be. Depending on the sign of your 7th house, those are the themes that'll teach you the lessons and open up old wounds. For example: Leo in the 7th house (Aquarius rising) you may attract and deal with partners who, worst case scenario, are selfish, egotistical, and want everything to revolve around them. This could trigger your childhood in which your parents fought with each other and forgot about you in the process. Another example is Aries descendent (Libra rising) you may deal with partners who are aggressive, dominating, and maybe even violent. This could trigger old wounds from childhood: maybe you lived in a home where domestic violence was prevalent. You get the idea.

Positives: You're not doomed in love by the way, it's just 7th house signs and their themes that will show up throughout your life. The examples I used were pretty extreme to get the point across. The positive here is that most of the time, the themes are much more discreet. For the 7th house Chiron in Leo example I used, it could be that your partner is self centered and you recognize and treat this. Could be an easy lesson learned (well it better be because if not it's gonna keep showing up).

Chiron in the 11th house: Chiron in the 11th house is a placement I personally have using Placidus. These natives never feel like they fit in, they feel like they're looked at as the outcast, like they don't belong. This is usually the consequences of being bullied as a child and made to feel less than. These people could go through a hard time in life where they have no friends and feel like they have no one to turn to. Loneliness could be a prominent theme in their lives especially when they're young. Chiron in the 11th house would rather have one on one connections than be part of a friend group.

Positives: Could be an advocate for people sharing similar experiences, knows how to be a good friend, values friendships and knows how to be alone.

Chiron conjunct Pluto: I have this one! I've noticed that certain painful experiences; death, heartache, betrayal, rejection affect me SO much. Growing up my mom would just brush these things off and say that they're a part of life. But to me, these things would happen and I would grow to fear them immensely. For example; my grandmother who I was super close to passed away when I was 17 and ever since then I've been terrified of my parents dying. Painful experiences really change people with this aspect, for better or for worse.

Positives: These people are forced to confront their deepest fears which in turn makes them stronger. They have the power to transform themselves after traumatic events.

Lilith in the 1st house: Lilith is the exact opposite of what "women should be" which rubs people, men specifically, the wrong way. It also rubs older generations the wrong way or whoever believes in traditional gender roles. Here in the 1st house, these natives embody Lilith which, you guessed it, rubs people the wrong way. They usually have trauma related to males trying to put them down or put them in their place, even as a child. Growing up, adult women could talk about them negatively as well. Everywhere they go, there's people that look at them sideways; they're either disgusted or intrigued. They often experience people hating them for "no reason". The real reason for this reaction is because they make people feel threatened just by being. They were also sexualized from a young age and could've had older people, mostly men, commenting on their bodies.

Positives: Extremely magnetic and alluring, blessed with beauty, intense aura and presence, always gets what they want.

Lilith in the 10th house: Similar to Lilith in the 1st house, these natives have a tendency to set people off just by being themselves. This creates a lot of disturbance in the workplace; people either love them or hate them but either way their reaction to them is extreme. Male authority can either sexualize them or belittle them making the workplace uncomfortable. Lilith being Lilith here, they may use this power to their advantage and climb the ranks so to speak. Rumors about them swirl around the workplace because people are just obsessed.

Positives: Strong people, very attractive, can use their good looks to their advantage, will grow to be a boss.

18° in Personal Planets/1st house/6th house/8th house: 18° is the shadow side of Virgo. Having this degree could indicate serious illness, tragedy, and critical misfortunes playing a role in your life. This doesn't have to be the native themselves experiencing these things, but it will affect them whether that be through family, a partner, friendships, etc.

Positives: I feel like this could be true but not always so if you have this degree anywhere you're most likely safe. But then again you might not be. Good luck. :)

🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿💙🧿

I'm definitely forgetting a bajillion placements but it's all so negative so I'm going to end here. I'm not trying to be negative I'm just shining a light on certain placements because they're fucking hard to deal with!!!

To the people that say no placement is bad or negative: how does it feel to have rainbows and sunshine shooting out of your fucking ass?! Be forreal.

Life is hard, we all know that. How could we appreciate the fortunes if we didn't have misfortunes? For all the negative there will be positive too. Here's to all of us and our shitty fucking placements 🎉

[kestrel-of-herran]

my thoughts on peterrose in season two + predictions for season three

i want to preface this by saying that i ended up enjoying season two wayyy more than season one, and i think it came down to the bigger complexity of the storyline, the unpredictable alliance switches and twists, and the depth with which the afterglow of peter and rose's experiences and relationship in season one was handled. this season's focus on angst and exploration of the psychological impact of the work on both of them and what it means for their relationship really elevated the love story for me from a pretty clean-cut "us against the world" vibe to the messiness of both of them being used to blackmail the other and their relationship straining because of the secrecy around the missions and the contradictions of rose feeling safe with peter but being constantly endangered by his work and peter needing rose around for his peace of mind but rose suffering psychologically from her proximity to the morally grey aspects of his work. chef's fucking kiss where's the next course

peterrose things i loved in season two + development from season one

rose having the option to leave anytime

while in the first season both of them had little actual choice about whether to stick together or not, circumstances that created a kind of bubble around them and aided the romance, this time around rose could have backed out repeatedly, making every time she chose to stay a decision that had as much to do with peter as with the help she thought she could give to the investigation. not only was she there at the beginning to help him gain some trust in people back and make sure he didn't steer off the ethical path, but later she also discovered for herself that even in the thick of danger (the party, the air vents situation in the last ep) she prefers to try to help rather than back away. it's a mode of thinking that will definitely lead her to sharing some of the danger of the job longer-term if the show lets her explore it.

closeness without labels

this is one aspect that i thought was handled with so much care and delicacy in a way that felt very satisfying to watch. they haven't seen each other in ten months, but she still has scores of photos saved on her phone (the show could have easily gone with one selfie, the fact she was always showing a different photo really shows they dated for a while before his posting, and were happy enough during it to constantly take pics) and doesn't hesitate to ditch her job and track him into danger because she's worried sleepless about him. she doesn't hold not calling her back over him even though she's clearly hurt about it because she knows it's out of his control, but he still apologizes and makes it clear again and again how thankful he is that she's there and how she's helped him both emotionally and logistically, like with noticing an attacker or planning the party heist. even as he wants her to leave to be safe, he doesn't make her feel like she's intruded or endangered his mission, but follows her advice and always gives her credit when she contributes to the work. they're comfortable enough with each other to cuddle and hug and kiss spontaneously, but they never discuss exactly what kind of relationship they're in because it's obviously a closeness both of them enjoy and initiate and they care more about being together than giving their relationship a label or discussing a future together at a point when he's so involved with his work and she's still sorting out how she feels about it. she doesn't pressure him about quitting and he doesn't force her to stay, he notices whenever she's upset and talks things out with her, and gives her space to process her feelings even if it means she might realize she's better off out of his kind of life. they both try to give the other whatever they might need in terms of emotional support and space to change their mind, even if that contradicts what they each would prefer the other to do or want or if it would result in emotional pain for them personally.

domesticity

i was absolutely treated to this trope this season. sharing clothes, him casually bringing her drinks while she's working, buying her food and knowing her preferences by heart, all the little jokes and fights that just made them feel like a family throughout the season. it shows clearly that their dynamic goes beyond needing each other in dangerous situations, that they were having a swell time just teasing each other. it's a quieter dynamic than the previous season, because they're both more aware of the constant and repeatedly chosen danger of the situation that is now a way of life rather than a crazy few days before things would go back to normal, but it's also more profound in how it acknowledges the trauma while showing they're still really compatible in the little safe haven of their nights at home.

partnership

they really felt like an agent couple in this season, not only in the way their skills complement the other's, but also in how they're both on the same wavelength of thinking during high-stakes situations and are able to brainstorm through them together or understand each other without words. peter didn't hesitate to tell the guy blackmailing him with rose's life to fuck off because he has faith in her ability to evade the attacker if he warns her. rose's involvement saved several of the missions from going south, and as much as he's uncomfortable with her choosing danger over safety in the moment, he clearly admires the effectiveness of her contribution. moments like when she noticed the comms being overheard and when she ambushed markus and showed peter what she'd do just by counting with her hand really show how perfectly they work as a team, and how much smoother operations in the future would go if they're both there to have each other's backs and think through problems together.

your life for hers

fuck me uppppp i love this shit soooooo much. i think one of the main jobs a writer has when developing a plotline is to explore all likely scenarios emerging from the goals and feelings of the character until that point, and the emotional development when it comes to peter protecting rose here is spectacular. while in the first season he was focused on protecting her partly from a feeling of friendship and because he wanted to do right by her and felt responsible for her, in this season it's as clear as day that he's protecting her because he values her life more than his and he's completely aware that if something happens to her it'll wreck him completely. he spends the better part of the season processing the loss of a mission partner and blaming himself for it, and it only serves to bring into focus how much worse things will be for him if rose gets hurt. she's no longer someone he's protecting because it's the right thing to do but someone so precious to him he's fraying at the edges just imagining something happening to her. she's his priority to the point that he doesn't hesitate to throw the mission and put himself in the position of a traitor that he has so much trauma about because of his father, because her being alive and safe is worth every sacrifice to him. the look on his face every time he was blackmailed is 1000000/10.

separation parallels

i really felt the upgrade of the separation scene this season, from the neat wrap-up of the hero flying off into the sunset while his girl waits happily for his call to both characters showing their emotions with all their bitter aftertaste and just feeling through a situation they can't amend right now. i absolutely love how worried rose was whenever someone slipped that peter had done something he could be charged for and all through peter explaining his decision to her, because it's not just that he loves her but that she was used against him and as long as they love each other this can happen again. peter was just excellent here, from taking the time to tell her himself to checking his urge not to get to the bottom of his feelings and taking her hands as he told her the full truth of what he feels for her. rose just breaking down crying and him hugging her and that head kiss was just sooooooooooo perfect in capturing how much they care for each other. rose's expressions as she watches him leave in the taxi and her going towards it are particularly telling, as is her struggle to maintain her smile and carefree tone while talking to noor. her reaching out to noor in the first place speaks volumes to me already, because if she didn't want to be involved with peter's world anymore i doubt she'll want to meet with anyone from that stage in her life now that she's managed to break away from it. noor wasn't buying any of her statements, and from the scene when she sensed something was wrong with her family leaving iran from rose's facial expressions alone, i think she's pretty good at reading her, and the lingering shots on her face leave little doubt rose isn't as fine as she'd like her to think.

predictions for rose in season three and beyond

my thoughts on statements of the writers and actors

the two things that are on my mind when i'm reviewing all the interviews that have addressed rose potentially not continuing with the show are that (1) the showrunners have the right to change their mind about the focus of the show whenever and although it would be like shooting themselves in the foot if they drop her that's their (very unreasonable bc i love rose to pieces) call to make, and (2) no one involved with the show would reveal a major twist before the season has even finished shooting. let's look at some statements of the cast and crew in light of that.

"We don’t want to artificially create a situation where characters have to be part of a specific season on a regular basis. We want to tell the story that feels true in that moment. I am very aware that one of the big strengths of Season 1 — and what I think is a big strength in Season 2 — are Peter and Rose together. I think the relationship is really strong. [...] Their shared trauma from these first two seasons has built this incredible bond. But is it enough to overcome the difference in their lives and their lifestyles Is something that we spend a lot of time talking about. So, not trying to duck the question, but we’re still creatively looking into all that. This, hopefully, with the success, will be a long-running show, and the question you raise is something that we talk a lot about in the writers room." (source)

they're clearly still writing the season and figuring out where they want to place rose in the story without compromising her moral code, and i think they might have wanted to hear the audience's and critics' responses to this as well before they wrap up this season's plot. journalists keep bringing this up in interviews and i think that's very telling to how the public as a whole and not just the shipping fandom views the show as about the both of them, so i hope that interest makes a difference in how they perceive the future of the show as a successful one as well, since they do need people to stick around and characters are a huge draw (case in point i started this for the couple rather than the plot, and didn't even find the plot engaging until season two, but i'd never spend hours of my morning writing an analysis for their excellent handling of plot only). they're clearly aware of peter and rose as a huge boon to the show, but also want to make sure that either of the actors not being able to continue with the series isn't going to put the whole thing out of business. one way i see this playing out is with rose having reduced screen time in season three but coming in as a regular in season four for example, if another season of peter doing agent stuff while she develops something (a program, fighting skills) is what's required for her to fit smoothly in the events surrounding him. i can also see they're anxious not to repeat plot points and make copies of previously successful seasons, so i expect rose's future involvement in the plot to be more creative and not replicate her previous actions, e.g. her not seeking him out on her own in a similar way again, but likely coming in as a partner already in some official capacity.

"That will be a part of Season 3, him trying to emotionally and logistically deal with the unintended consequences of his actions in season 2. [...] The goal isn’t darkness but what I would say is — and I’m involved in a coalition that talks a lot about how mental health is portrayed on TV — one of the things that we wanted to do in Season 2 was model Rose’s behavior as being how you want to approach trauma and violence in your life. She’s seeking professional help, and she’s making progress. Peter, on the other hand, is approaching it in a very old fashioned, very masculine, frankly, way of burying it, ignoring it, and that doesn’t often work. I’m always adamant that I don’t want the show to become so dark and impenetrable, so I think you’re going to see a lot of sides of Peter in Season 3 in the same way that you did in Season 2. I hear your question, and no, the show isn’t about going to the abyss with Peter." (source)

kuddos to them for that honestly i absolutely loved the ptsd portrayal in season two, but the main thing i'm getting from this response is that it's very unlikely for rose to be killed off to remove her from the plot at this point, or to double down on peter's trauma, because that's how peter would define "going into the abyss" imho.

"I would say that that moment, that breakup scene, felt true to us, the writers, as we were crafting the second season. That they live in two very different worlds, that he wants to be in this world that's dangerous, that she doesn't particularly want to be in a world that's dangerous, and yet they have this incredibly strong connection forged over living through and helping each other through these traumatic events. So there's always going to be this incredible connection between the two. What that will mean for their onscreen pairing I think is something that we continue to talk about and will figure out. So, I don't know yet, because we haven't definitively decided what it means for the characters. I will just tell you that we love the character of Rose. We love the character of Peter. We love Luciane and Gabriel as actors. I think they're tremendous together. When we started to work on season 2, I came back to the writers with what I felt were strengths of the show from season 1, and the very first one I wrote down was Peter and Rose together. So we don't take that lightly. At the same time, we don't want to craft something that feels inauthentic just to be a fan service, to keep them together in ways that might feel unrealistic. So that will be the responsibility and the struggle of the writing staff and myself as we craft further seasons." (source)

i think bringing them on the same page about the work can be done with the kind of emotional development they pursued when they explored the impact of trauma and morally grey choices on both of them, so i see this mostly as a matter of narrative time and writing effort, providing they're willing to put those in, rather than the characters being naturally incompatible in terms of their life goals. case in point, rose's characterization in season one came down to happy to break the rules, threaten people with arms, steal things, and kill to protect others or to avenge her loved ones. it's only in season two that we see her struggle with threatening people and endangering lives, so that was a very conscious narrative choice and a huge pivot for her character arc from a tiny daredevil (aspects of her we still see in the party scene for example) to the voice of reason in ethically dubious situations. this kind of major change of heart can happen easily with sufficient screen time and the kind of plot points to inspire it, and is completely within the writers' abilities should they want it to take place.

"I have no idea [whether Rose will be back in season three], and I can’t spoil anything. I wish I could tell you, but Peter does say ‘No, don’t come looking for me,’ and I don’t think Rose takes well to direction; she does whatever she wants. So you never, never know." (source)

it's worth seeing the video of her answering this question, because honestly to me she seems happy to give a little hint of something bigger. it's either her character sixth sense talking (and she's right), or she already knows she'll be brought back to wrap-up the season. i think rose showing up unexpectedly, and prepared, when peter's been spending the season dealing with choosing her safety over remaining clean, is only going to contribute to that theme.

"You can have love for someone without physically expressing it. I think that’s, I don’t want to say trope, but a lazy way of showing that two people care about each other is having them hook up. Sacrificing your life for someone or putting your life at risk to save someone, I think, is a bigger testament of love than giving them a kiss or something like that. The relationship is important to both of them, and you see that through their commitment to one another and keeping one another alive, regardless if that means they’re going to be together, at least they’ll have done what they can to protect the other." (source)

turn this shit upppppppp i love this so much... but this brings me to the fact that as long as they're in love they will be used against each other, so it's time to develop some scenarios from there (and i don't mean them not being in love anymore bc that's just unrealistic at this point; it would require either of them making choices the other can't understand and the entire series becoming more dark, "you can't love anyone"-style, than the writers seem to want it to; giving peter another love interest instead also just seems like undoing a ton of hard work and audience interest just to pull a james bond, and i think they care about being original way more).

plot-realistic scenarios

i'm using this term (likely made-up by me, a writer finishing a book atm btw) here to indicate scenarios that need to be followed for the plot to feel satisfying, e.g. ignoring them would require some disbelief suspension and might make the audience doubt they're seeing the logical development of events and characters as they have been built up so far.

rose is going to continue being used to threaten peter

if part of his goal next season is to eventually turn against the guy holding rose's life over his head, peter needs to make sure she'll survive that plot point, either by protecting her again or warning her and making sure she's in a safe environment while he takes the guy down, for which we need at least a cameo, though that is the laziest way to wrap this up imho. i think the guy will absolutely keep tabs on her so he can use that if peter goes astray, so she'll be involved in this as long as peter's an agent even if she's living a normal life, and i doubt peter will be able to make anyone believe that he doesn't care about her since all it takes for the truth to come out is for someone to point a gun at her head.

rose would benefit from some combat training or security if she's going to make it through this show alive

at the very least, keeping rose out of the show without killing her means also providing her with the means to protect herself as long as peter is being blackmailed with her life, which is one of the few plot points that seems to be a given for the next season. a basic agent training course that would allow her to rebuff attackers, or security trailing her to make sure peter isn't compromised because of her, are the least catherine can do to make sure her plans for peter are successful.

catherine doesn't seem to be done trying to use rose

at multiple points throughout this season, catherine was impressed with rose's coding and recruited her help for a job, and i doubt she'll just let an asset go if she thinks she can be useful. she knows peter's a weak spot for rose that she can utilize to put pressure on her (like with the security cameras, the consequence of rose's choice not to join would have been peter being exposed to more danger, so she changed her mind), and since peter is pretty central to her plans for season three, it makes sense to keep rose closer rather than further. she knows rose can get through to peter when no one else can or take him out of the path she's set out for him, so risking her being too far out of sight to influence strikes me as unreasonable. and what better way to bring rose back into the action than with a bang, by placing her in the middle of a covert mission in later eps (preferably without warning peter to amplify the emotional climax of the reunion) with the kind of skills that would make her at least competent in avoiding capture when things go wrong.

the show has barely scratched the surface of rose as an agent

i mean this seriously, there's so much to work with when it comes to her becoming an agent or helping out with some of the jobs or even if she's joining the action as a voice on the comms while she's hacking some system. peter won't always be in the position to make sure she's safe, and she's been showing so much resilience, quick thinking, and willingness to pull a gun or stab someone during a fight. she's smart, a creative and smooth liar, and refuses to give up even when the odds of her making it are slim. she'll be an asset to any mission the show involves her in, and keeping her in a california office is a huge waste of potential.

rose's arc is far from wrapped up

the thing with rose as a character is that her arc could have been wrapped up in season one without bringing her into season two and the show would still have made sense despite the (disappointing for me the rose fan) shift in focus from romance to political intrigue. the showrunners seem keen to be making that shift anyway, but they decided to keep peter and rose's relationship as not only a subplot but the driving force behind peter's moral conflict and the starting point of him becoming a double agent in season three. rose received a great amount of screen time, agency, and emotional development, but it wasn't enough to feel that she exited the story cleanly and permanently. she clearly still has a lot of processing to do when it comes to both her feelings for peter and whether she wants to join the action and save lives (at multiple points in the show she turned back and rejoined dangerous situations not only out of love for him, but because i think she knows that without her input, chances of things fucking up increase exponentially) despite the danger to her safety, mental health, and moral integrity, and the way to conclude these plot points is to give her more screen time to get full closure or process her trauma and decide to become more involved with night action. even with new storylines and characters appearing, the show will only benefit from keeping rose and peter's relationship as a subplot and exploring the shift in their dynamic and feelings if she's cleared to join the missions on par with him or becomes an agent on other postings unbeknownst to him at first (night action picking up the phone when he has a crisis in season three or her appearing in a completely unrelated undercover mission happening in the same place he's working his target so both of them are thrown off-balance by the proximity). how will their romance develop if she's as competent a fighter as him, if she puts herself at risk as regularly, if their superiors try to use them against each other to manipulate both to their ends? now that's something i'd kill to watch.

[sadokasochism]

For me, the most heartbreaking aspect of Ivan is that the poor clueless bastard didn't have the tools to express his affection in any way that didn't involve violence or manipulation, or weren't too inscrutable, quiet, or unseen to be picked up by Till.

I definitely interpret Ivan as autistic for several reasons, a big one being their Segyein teacher's notes about him:

It's just. Classic ND behaviour to me.

Not only does expressing emotion and communicating the way other kids do not come naturally to Ivan, but it's not as if he's been given a great example of coping with this from the Segyein.

Ivan managed to mask in a way that made him popular with other students, and got him in the good graces of their captors. He did everything expected of him to survive and thrive in this environment.

Then he meets Till, inscrutable and very different to the other kids, just like Ivan is. Except, Till doesn't mask. He doesn't change or try to endear himself to their captors, and he doesn't bend to anyone, no matter how much he is hurt and punished for it.

This is a new situation for Ivan, and he's never had anything to compare his feelings to. He also can't figure out how to communicate with Till, every interaction, no matter how well meaning, seems to end in failure.

I bring your attention to the cheer up comic, and how, again, autistic this interaction feels:

There could be many reasons why Ivan chose to say what he did, but to me it feels like ND bluntness not being received well. And that's fair! From Till's perspective Ivan is being a jerk for no good reason.

Instead of responding with glee towards Till laying him out (as we see from Ivan when they're a bit older), Ivan justs seems... really confused. Like he didn't expect that statement to upset Till that much, and he didn't expect Till to respond in the way he did. Everything was fine a second ago, what went wrong?

Then, Ivan uses the phrase he learned from Till in an attempt to self sooth. It might have been the first example of comfort after an injury/hurt he had ever seen, given how he defaults to it. And it was from Till trying to cheer up a flower.

This also shows some of Till's blindspots. He has grown up having to be vigilant, because violence and hurt have been a core part of his upbringing. This leads to anything he doesn't immediately, clearly understand being perceived as a threat or a slight, and so he reacts violently to Ivan's statement.

I'll also draw your attention to this comic where, as far as we know, Ivan is simply stating a true fact in a blunt manner:

In my interpretation, these types of interactions keep adding up, and Ivan is grasping at straws the whole time, trying to be closer to Till and failing every time.

Eventually, the only surefire way to get Till's attention is to piss him off, provoke him, manufacture scenarios to talk to him. I'm not excusing this behaviour, but I understand where Ivan could be coming from, from the perspective of both an emotionally immature/stunted child and/or an ND child.

Despite how much they fight and bicker, at every moment it really mattered, Ivan was there for Till. It was always Ivan coming to free him, to take off his collar or gag, and it was Ivan who led their escape.

Ivan couldn't leave Till behind when he went back for Mizi. Even with the confirmation that Till would choose Mizi over Ivan every time, Ivan couldn't leave him.

The miscommunication goes two ways though. It's insane to think that Till didn't care about Ivan at all. They were close as kids, and I doubt Till ever forgot about the escape he gave up.

We have the graduation messages, where Ivan is able to write something that could be reasonably interpreted as affectionate or fond towards Till.

Meanwhile, Till's message-

If we're being charitable with our interpretations, we can say this was Till's way of saying 'of course I remember you' and attempting to communicate that Ivan HAD left a lasting impact on him.

However, how could any reasonable person be expected to get THAT out of 'you stole my fucking pencil'? Ivan could have taken this one of two ways:

1) Omg he remembers me 🥰

2) he leans into his 'i will never be loved back' bias and thinks that Till really doesn't care about him at all

Who the hell knows what goes through that weird little brain of his. But given how Round 6 went, and what Ivan had to say in the confession comic, he obviously didn't think his impact was significant enough.

Then Alien Stage happens, and in Round 3 Ivan is FINALLY communicating his feelings in a way that is vulnerable and might even have a chance of being understood as love and yearning!

Till is unconscious through it until the very end.

Then in the next round, Mizi goes missing, and Till can't care about anything anymore.

Ivan finds him after the private performance, takes off his gag, and just holds him. Again, Till is unconscious for all of this.

Then, in Round 6, not only is Till distraught from the disappearance of Mizi, but he's given no time to process what the fuck is going on before Ivan is dead at his feet. Till might have finally had a chance to really understand where Ivan was coming from, how he really felt all this time, and Ivan DIES.

And still, Ivan's most transparent act of affection? It's delivered with violence. He's kissing a distraught Till who tries to push him away, and neither of them are happy. He puts his hands around Till's neck, not really hurting him, but it's enough to look convincing for the cameras, and it's enough for Till to go limp and wait for death. Ivan's final loving act is to give Till a soft look with blood pouring out of his mouth, that Till still does not see, and then let go before falling to the ground.

It's just a collection of failures. We see from Ivan that he truly loved Till, made a lot of selfless decisions for his sake, was filled with so much longing and affection, but he just couldn't get it across in a way that doesn't seem fucking deranged from an outsider's perspective. And when he DID manage to communicate his feelings more clearly, it was to a Till that was unconscious, or too distracted/dense/traumatised to see Ivan's actions as ones of love.

There's no guarantee that Till would have reciprocated even if Ivan had managed to communicate his feelings in a healthier way, but there was at least a CHANCE. At least Ivan could have gotten some closure, even if he was rejected.

Instead Ivan died thinking he was completely unloved by the person who he cared about more than anything else, and his last ditch effort to make Till understand was deeply flawed and uncomfortable.

If these kids had grown up any other way, maybe they could have had a chance. Unfortunately, the world they were in didn't equip them to not hurt eachother in their attempts to grow closer.

[mysecretlittlelibrary]

Second Lesson

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Word Count: 3.1k

Warnings: edging and overstimulation

Genre: smut

Summary: Some things are not self explanatory, and Steve has decided he's going to fill in the gaps by coming to you to ask his questions about sex and some of those questions have more involved answers than you'd expect

***

You hear a knock at your door while you're looking for something in your closet.

"Coming!" You call, taking a moment to contain the hurricane that you've created in there. You open the door to find Steve in the hall.

"Are you busy?" He asks.

"Not particularly, what's up?"

"I have another question."

"Shoot." You say, gesturing for him to walk into your room.

"Edging. What it is?"

"It is pleasuring yourself or someone else until the brink of orgasm without letting them actually have an orgasm."

"That sounds like torture." Steve frowns.

"Sometimes it is. It can be used as a punishment, some people enjoy it though, it can also be about increasing endurance- you know- training to last longer in bed, it also usually makes the orgasm more intense when you do eventually get to that point."

"Huh, have you done it before?"

"Been on both sides." You shrug. "Oh also I should mention that like most kink terms there is an equal yet opposite complementary term. For edging its complementary term is overstimulation."

"And that is?"

"If edging is about restraint when it comes to pleasure then overstimulation is a hedonistic indulgence in it. Orgasming again and again and again, sometimes to the point of pain this is where a safe word can be useful because you may say things like stop or I can't take it especially because post orgasm sensitivity can be a bitch but the whole point is to keep going and if you've already talked about exploring either edging or overstim, your partner will probably ignore you saying stop because again the point is to keep going even if you are sensitive, but if they're going to ignore you saying it's too much, you need to be able to stop them if it actually is too much."

"Are all aspects of sex so- severe?" He asks.

"No. Sex can be incredibly soft and gentle and sweet, it can be slow and tender in many ways. I mean, you saw some of that last time. You just- happen to have coincidentally questions about the other end of the spectrum today." You shrug.

"It just seems very, intense. Like maybe too intense? I don't get why you would want to put someone through that. It seems like a slippery slope, sex should be about love not some form of- torture."

"Well calm down, you sound panicked and it's not like I'm going to strap you down and force you to experience it. It's not for everyone Steve, different people have different preferences, this is why it's good to have those conversations before you sleep with someone so nobody gets put in a stressful situation they didn't sign up for. Plus there are a lot of ways to express love you know. If your person wants you to do these things then that absolutely shows that you love them, especially if you do them with the care you're meant to."

"I just don't understand it I guess." He shakes his head.

"That's fine Stevie, no one can force you to do it or enjoy it or even comprehend it really. Like I said, it's a personal preference. Just- be honest with your partner when the time comes." You shrug.

"What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Do you... like this stuff?" Steve asks.

"I do. With the right person."

"Really?"

"You have your ideas about sex, I have mine." You shrug.

"What's that mean?"

"You said sex is about showing love and I agree with that to a point but to me it's also about pleasure. It's about exploring yourself, sometimes through someone else. It's about learning and adventure. The heat and intensity, passion that is borderline all consuming, sex can be many things. I like to experience all of them."

"Oh." He breathes.

"Of course that's just me. I'm not here to change your mind about anything." You hum.

"I have to try this edging thing."

"You don't. The hands on lessons are an option not an obligation, you don't seem interested in that and that's fine! You can just take the verbal explanation and proceed with your day as long as it makes sense to you, there's no reason to force yourself to try something that don't appeal to you." You shake your head.

"Well, it's hard to understand something if you're not open to experiencing it right?"

"I mean, I guess sometimes."

"So I want to experience it. That way I can understand it." He insists.

"As long as you're sure about this."

"I'm sure. Let's do it." He nods.

"What? Now?"

"Do you have time?"

"Depends on what time it is now."

"Three seventeen."

"I've got til six, I have another engagement later this evening."

"Is that enough time?"

"Plenty. Get comfortable, I would recommend getting naked, you do need to at least take off your pants or you'll likely stain them but it'll probably be more comfortable to take off everything because there's a chance you'll get hot. I know you run pretty warm already but I don't know how much you'd enjoy your shirt sticking to your back after twenty minutes." You say.

"Right, yeah." Steve hesitantly shuffles out of his pants and underwear and then, after seemingly debating in his head, he also pulls his shirt over his head and places all of them on your desk chair before sitting on the bed.

"Alright, I'm going to treat this like I would a real situation. Of course, the expectations are different, I know so don't worry about performing a certain way. Just like last time if at any point you have a question or something makes you feel uncomfortable you can simply say so assuming you can focus. If you can't focus use your stoplight. Yellow, or red, just like we discussed before." You tell him as you pull open the drawer by your bed and grab the bottle of lube.

"What's that for?" Steve asks when you squirt a generous amount into your hand.

"It's a lubricant. It might be a little cold at first, but I'm sure you'll appreciate it, especially the longer this goes." You say sitting beside him. "I'm going to touch you now, is that alright?" You ask.

"Yes." Steve nods with more conviction than you'd expect. You wrap your fingers around the base of his dick and he takes in a large breath. His exhale is shaky as you drag your hand up his length with a pressured grip. You circle his tip, slowly massaging it, watching his reactions, enjoying the way his abdomen seems to flex sporadically. His breathing is coming out harsher now and you begin to pump him. Last time you made a point not to stare at him since he was clearly rather nervous about the whole thing but not looking is rather impossible with this 'lesson' so you take the time to really get a look at his dick as you stroke him. The tip is a reddish pink and there are a couple veins running very noticeably along it. You already knew he was big, he's been inside you for fuck's sake, but looking at it unobstructed, boy was he... endowed.

"So how this works Stevie, usually, is that you'll tell me when you're close, ask me, beg me if I tell you to, ask me to cum and I'll tell you if you've earned it. Of course I won't demand all that from you, I'm rather good at reading people's bodies." You explain to him, stroking faster, holding a little bit tighter.

"W-what do you mean usually?" He asks wearily.

"When I do this with partners. There's a bit of power play that comes with this, if you hadn't noticed, having control of how much pleasure your person receives at any given moment. It's a very powerful feeling. But this is more about teaching you than my own enjoyment, so it's a bit different, I'm just offering you more details about the appeal of it all." You explain.

"A-and you- you like that? The p-power play?" He asks. You can tell he's really starting to struggle with his focus, his body is twitching, and he's gripping the sheets, blinking rapidly as he speaks. You watch his whole body tense up and take that as your cue to ease up. You slow your wrist to almost a stop, relishing in the groan Steve lets out.

"I find it can be intoxicating." You smirk.

"So that's how this works?" He pants.

"Pretty much." You nod, picking up speed again. Steve moans as his body jolts again. You can't help but imagine how nice he'd look with a couple of hickeys. You won't be giving him any of course but the idea does captivate you for a brief moment. It's clear that Steve is trying to control his reactions, but the shaky breaths and strained grunts give him away.

"My god." He whispers, tipping his head back. If it was anybody but Steve saying those words, you'd affirm that you are their god and they should worship you as such but it's not somebody else, it's Steve and you'd best keep it simple. When his body tenses up again, you slow your hand accordingly, and Steve lets out a strained groan.

"You know Stevie, you don't have to try so hard to keep quiet. I like your little noises. They're hot." You say.

"I'm not- r-really used to... making n-noises like that." He pants out.

"Well, a bit of advice, most girls like to hear that you're enjoying yourself."

"Really?"

"Yep." You say, stroking him faster, again. You continue your game with him, slowing down when his body tenses up and speeding up when his shuddering breaths quiet. With each denied orgasm his restraint on his vocalizations seems to slip, by the fith time you're slowing down he's an unending string of moans and grunts and even a few whimpers when you squeeze in just the right place.

"This is torture." Steve grits out. His entire body is flushed and his skin is glistening.

"I know but you're doing so well. Just a little longer and I promise I'll reward you. Don't you want that?" You ask with a mocking sweetness in your tone.

"Please." He says breathlessly.

"Oh that sounded nice." You smile. You're not even trying to break him like you would under usual circumstances but the sound him whimpering please to you almost makes you want to.

"Y/n- I feel, like I'm on fire. Please I need to cum." Steve huffs through clenched teeth and you start to wonder if he's reaching his limit. Gripping his chin you gently tilt his head to look at you.

"Checking in Stevie, gimme a color please." You say softly.

"G-green, this is insane." He says shakily.

"You haven't tapped out yet." You smile slightly.

"Is that the goal?"

"Not today." You wink at him. You decide it's probably best to stop here, so you pick up your speed again watching for the telltale signs of his orgasm but this time you finally let him peak and you can't decide if the sound or sight is more dazzling. Either way, you work him through it as evidence of his release spurts over your hand and his thighs in thick ropes. There's an impressive amount of it and you wonder if this is a super soldier thing or if he's just really pent up. When nothing else comes out and he hisses against your touch you let him go. "I'm gonna get a wash cloth, hang tight." You tell him standing from the bed and walking into your bathroom. You rinse your hand first and then soak a washcloth with room temperature water. When you pop back out his arm is draped over his eyes but he otherwise hasn't moved. You start with his neck, wiping the sweat that's probably made his skin sticky. You do a quick swipe across his chest too before moving on to cleaning the remenants of his orgasm from his thighs and recovering dick. "How are we feeling?" You ask him once he's clean. You toss the washcloth in your hamper and grab a water from your mini fridge before sitting beside him on the bed.

"That was- intense." He says.

"Yes but you knew that going in."

"I mean- when you finally let me, you know. It was intense- probably more so than I've ever felt." He says and you giggle at his avoidance of saying orgasm.

"We should really work on your comfortablilty with some of these terms. But yes that intensity is a high some people crave."

"Wow."

"Was it worth it?" You ask.

"What?"

"You said it was the most intense orgasm you've ever had, would you say the payoff was worth the buildup? After all you called it torture."

"You're not even nice about it."

"I was actually very nice, I didn't wait til you were crying to get you off which- is usually what I'll do."

"You make people cry?" He blinks surprised.

"Sometimes." You shrug.

"That's- further than I-"

"I know, that's why I didn't make you cry. Although crying is way more likely with overstimultion anyhow." You shrug.

"Is it?"

"Wanna see for yourself?" You ask opening your bedside drawer again.

"Well I'm not sure I can hand-"

"Here." You drop one of your toys in his hand.

"What's this?"

"A vibrator. I figure it's not fair if every lesson is just me doing things to you like some sort of lab rat so I thought you might want to try overstimulating me. The only other way for that to happen is for you to learn my body but who has time for that? This is efficient and pretty much idiot proof it'll get the job done regardless of your personal experience." You shrug.

"You- want me to use this on you?" He asks wide eyes watching you quickly take off your clothes.

"Yes I do. It's simple, I promise. It does most of the work for you. If you have the energy for it that is." You say.

"Depends on just how simple it is." He says. You sit on the bed next to him and grab his wrist, placing the vibrator in his hand against your clit. It's not on but your insides still clench in anticipation when it touches you.

"Put it here, small circles or wiggling it up and down is fine but keep it in this general area, start with light pressure and press harder as we go. I'll be using the same stoplight system, so here's a couple of preliminary warnings, if I squirm away follow me or hold me down, if I cry that's fine, if I scream let me, ignore me if I ask you to stop or say it's too much. In fact, no matter what, you keep this against me until I call red and I will call red. Sound simple enough?"

"You might cry and that's a good thing?" He frowns.

"It's not a bad thing. It probably won't happen anyway I'm just covering my bases no need to look so terrified." You chuckle.

"How do I turn this on?" He asks after a moment.

"The last button."

"What are the other two?"

"One controls the rhythym and the other controls the power, don't mess with those buttons. For the sake of this lesson they are off limits."

"Last one turns it on?"

"Yes." You nod. Steve stares at the buttons for a moment before a sharp click fills the silence and you jolt from the sudden stimulation. He moves the toy in tight circles, his face pinched in focus. Your hips grind against the vibrator and it doesn't take long for your first orgasm to hit you with a soft moan.

"Oh." Steve says, as if he's surprised.

"Keep going, add pressure." You huff out. Shuddering pants indicate that Steve's done what you asked, your muscles tensing from the continued pleasure post orgasm. The thing with this particular vibrator is that it works quick and you hardly manage to calm down before your second orgasm sneaks up on you. Steve trades the circles for little up and down motions that draw a couple sharp moans from you. 

"Are you okay?" He asks.

"Fine Stevie, I'm fine." You say shakily. Your third orgasm comes with a cry through your closed mouth. You know it's impractical to be so mindful of your sounds but you've got to remain at least semi-composed to be of any help to Steve. More and more your body spasms as the stimulation continues, practically twitching from the pleasure. Small whimpers begin to escape with more frequency as you quickly approach orgasm four. On this one your eyes roll back and you allow an obscene sounding high pitched moan to fall from your lips. Steve makes a sound somewhere in his throat which you barely hear. You're starting to feel that bite of overstimulation layering under the pleasure and it makes you squirm. You jerk against the toy, hoping for a reprieve from the buzzing and Steve, the dilligent student that he is, places a hand across your stomach, holding you in place and all you can do is cry out as he presses the vibrator firmly against your clit. You grip the sheets tightly as he starts to make little circles around your too sensitive bundle of nerves, your whole body is shaking as another orgasm quickly creeps up on you with a squealing noise and string of curses. You can feel your brain getting fuzzy, that familiar hedonistic haze threatens to blanket your thoughts, you know if you don't stop Steve soon you'll be far too blissed out to do so and Steve is not equipped to handle that sort of headspace.

"Okay, red. That's enough Stevie." You say breathlessly but firm. Steve quickly moves the toy but struggles to turn it off so you take it from him and turn it off yourself. You take a couple of moments to recompose yourself, ignoring the phantom buzzing and overwhelming wetness between your legs when you sit up and pull your knees to your chest.

"Are you alright? Do you need water? Can I get you something?"

"I'm fine Stevie. How are you feeling?"

"Me? I wasn't the one-"

"The whole point of this was to see if you enjoyed either edging or overstim- having tried both, do you feel like you at least have a better understanding of them like you wanted?"

"I- guess I have a better understanding."

"Well what're you thinking?"

"I thought I would- hate the edging thing but, as... intense as it was there was something, freeing about it? Like getting on a ride at Coney Island and the ending was, worth the build up."

"And overstimulation?"

"It's incredible watching the way your body reacts to such an onslaught. Plus the idea of bringing your lover imense pleasure like that is undeniably delicious, I can see how that kind of thing can be so thrilling."

"Well there you go. Questions answered. You're free to leave." You say.

"Are you sure you don't need anything?"

"I'm fine Steve I'm just going to hop in the shower you've got nothing to worry about really. I've got other things on my schedule of today remember?"

"Alright- if you're sure. I'll see you around. Enjoy your evening."

"Thanks. See ya." You say. Steve seems hesitant to leave but without a reason to stay, he has to shuffle his way out. You let out a sigh after your door closes. You've got a couple hours before your evening plans, good thing, you'll need it. Hopefully one of these days Steve will ask a simple question with a simple answer that doesn't a demonstration.

***

Tagged Users: @chososg1rl

[petermorwood]

Hi i have a question!

I just bought myself a decoration sword replica (anduril from lord of the rings) and I've been wondering: aren't swords supposed to be balanced at the point of the hilt?

Because mine isn't, and I'm wondering if it's because of the decoration sword aspect or if i was wrong in my assumption.

I don't know a lot about sword manoeuvrability, and definitely not enough to assess which point of balance might be useful for different uses, but I've been theorising that there lies a potential answer.

I am hopeful that you can help me clear the mystery, and thank you so much in advance!

No mystery IMO - it's almost certainly because of the word you yourself used twice.

What you've got isn't a sword as much as a decoration in the shape of a sword, a specific sword from a famous movie series at that, and to the average movie fan it's far more important for a replica prop to look like what it, is rather than actually work like it.

A really expensive replica "Ghostbusters" proton pack...

...may well have all the necessary blinkenlights and even a sound system for THAT power-up noise, but 99.999% of owners won't expect it to actually tear holes in the fabric of reality.

Of course there's always that .0001%, tinkering away at the back of garages or in basement workshops. If they ever get a proton pack to work properly, we'll all know. ;->

Replica swords, axes, maces etc. are an exception to this general rule. People want them to work, though TBH "work" usually just means "flourish in a dramatic way" (which can be problematic in itself, as you'll see).

Very few take it to the point (or edge) of "take my enemies apart", and those who do have left a trail of weapon bans in their wake. Thanks for nothing.

*****

On the subject of balance, just for curiosity I checked several of my own repro swords - specifically this lot, photographed some years back when they were out taking the air...

...and rather to my surprise, because the amount of metal in the hilts varies so much, the point of balance on Every Single One is more or less the same - a generous hand's-width, say 4-ish to 5-ish inches / 11-ish to 13-ish cm, down from where the lowest element of the guard stops.

This means, of course, that the balance point on the blade is further down on the side-sword (my avatar) and basket-hilt schiavona than it is on the plain cross-hilts, but that aside, one good handspan seems to be the default distance.

Where does your Andúril replica balance? You didn't mention.

*****

Balance point aside, being "battle-ready" (the usual tag for repros intended for clangy re-enactment) really isn't a consideration for movie replicas, since most if not all aren't meant for use beyond decor, posing, cosplay etc.

Swords like these got the nickname "wall-hanger" for a reason.

Decorative replicas are certainly not for fighting with, so whether or not they balance like a real sword is immaterial. I'm sure some do, I'm equally sure most don't.

TBH, posing and cosplay shouldn't include swinging the replicas about in violent combat simulation movements, because they're usually not made like real swords. The nature of their construction (a thing called a "rat-tail tang") means there's a potential fracture point concealed within the grip.

And THAT means the stresses of sword-fighting moves, even without hitting something, might snap blade from hilt. If not noticed in time, the next dramatic swing might send the blade flying off in a dangerous unintended direction.

About 10 years ago I wrote a long illustrated post about that risk. I've seen it happen and though no harm was done, it was a hair-raising (and for one person, almost hair-parting) experience.

*****

The main questions regarding an Andúril replica (or a Braveheart, a Longclaw, a Conan Atlantean etc., etc.) are these:

"Do I think it's an accurate recreation of the movie sword?"

"Do I think it's a handsome ornament in my home?"

"Do I think it's worth what I paid for it?"

"Does owning it make me happy?"

If the answer to those questions is "Yes", then that decorative replica has fulfilled the purpose for which it was made.

Hope This Helps! :->

[manganiti]

The Conflict Between the Yugi Twins From Their Point of View

In Amane's and Tsukasa's relationship there's the fact that they're twins so they grew up with each other, they shared different life experiences, they're each other's half and polar opposite and have a deeper connection because of it. However, there's a hierarchy between them. Amane is like the big brother to Tsukasa, and Tsukasa is the younger brother to Amane despite they're twins.

Amane's POV

Tsukasa sacrificed himself for Amane's health and after that, everything started to change between them and it deepened the conflict. After Tsukasa disappeared, Amane missed his brother very much and he probably felt guilty because Tsukasa disappeared shortly after he asked him if he loved him, but Amane never replied in a straightforward way. He felt guilty because he couldn't see the signs of Tsukasa going from his life, he couldn't understand his behaviour, his reasoning or the way he felt before he disappeared.

I think Amane always kept thinking about the way his little brother was before he merged with the pit god because when Tsukasa returned, he was different. Amane also admits that he doesn't understand his little brother since the day he disappeared and why his brother disappeared. He didn't understand Tsukasa's actions and feelings at all. He never knew that Tsukasa thought "Amane hates me so it will be okay if I disappear".

When Tsukasa returned, something changed about him and it was evident to Amane and his mother. Tsukasa wasn't possessed, but he wasn't entirely human anymore. I think the guilt Amane felt deepened when he saw that Tsukasa was different after he returned. So, maybe if they had a good relationship, there were some problems between them while they were still alive because Tsukasa acted differently. Amane loves his brother more than anyone, but probably he didn't truly accept the Tsukasa that returned because Tsukasa changed and deep down he feels guilty about it.

When they were 8, it's shown that Amane wanted to spend time with Tsukasa, so I think that despite what he thought deep down, he appreciated his younger brother more, he was the one protecting and guiding him. I think Amane became more attached to Tsukasa after he returned.

Now, when they were 12 years old, the person who Amane spent most of his time with, was Tsukasa. Even Tsukasa said to him "You'd prefer if I stayed here, right Amane?" So he didn't have friends at school. Tsukasa was the one who had friends and was popular. Despite this, Amane still displayed some signs of envy towards Tsukasa "you have a lot of friends, are you really my little brother?". Amane perceived that they were so different in this aspect. Tsukasa perceived this envy and retorted "of course Amane, you don't have any friends because you're tone deaf". This is a comical moment, but I think it shows that Amane felt envy towards Tsukasa and it hasn't changed since they were children.

Now, in a metaphorical sense, this scene of Tsukasa asking "You'd prefer I stayed here, right?" has a hidden meaning when tied with "or would you rather me gone? You have to decide". I think part of the memories Amane can’t recall are related to Tsukasa revealing something about merging with the pit god in exchange for his health or it could be that Amane discovered something about Tsukasa and the pit god based on Tsukasa's behaviour and that's why Tsukasa implicitly asks Amane "if he wants him to stay or to disappear" in the 1968 School Festival. "Will you accept me as I am now, or do you think I'm a fake?"

Maybe in Amane's mind at that time after that revelation, Tsukasa's changes started to make sense and he didn't make a decision yet. That also would explain what he said about "believing that the lunar rock was real" months later. On the surface, he decided to accept Tsukasa and preferred to think that he was still his brother as shown with that lunar rock metaphor that landed when he was 4 because he loves his brother very much even if he changed. So his final answer when he was alive was that he preferred to believe Tsukasa was still Tsukasa despite merging with the pit god.

However, in The Trial of the Clock Keepers, it’s shown that Amane didn't rule out the possibility that the Tsukasa who returned was an entity masquerading as him. It's clear that he still had his doubts, that deep down, he really didn't think that the Tsukasa that returned, was really his brother.

They had a good relationship, but I think a huge part of the conflict between them, is that despite Amane loves his little brother, he never truly accepted Tsukasa the way he was since he returned to his family because of his guilt, his mindset, because Tsukasa's behaviour was influenced by the pit god and because he didn't really understand his little brother's feelings or his reasoning. On the other hand, to some extent, Amane was influenced by what their mother thought about Tsukasa.

Amane thinks that once a dead person becomes a supernatural, "they stop being themselves, they get jumbled up" and he even also applies it to himself. In the following scene, it's clear what Yako stated, that no matter how berserk someone can become, how warped they're, or if they changed shape, they're still themselves. This scene and some other parts of the manga contradict what Amane thinks deep down.

When Amane became a supernatural (Hanako), he never accepted that berserk or warped part of himself. Maybe in the past, Kou's and Teru's grandmother sealed him because he went "berserk" and unleashed a part of himself he never knew existed. When he became a supernatural, it triggered something deep inside of him, that berserk, very dark part he has. But he doesn't accept it because he's scared of that dark side of himself. He doesn't accept the changes that comes with becoming a supernatural.

I also think that's why he prefers to call himself "Hanako". Because to him, Amane doesn't exist anymore. Amane ceased to exist after he became a supernatural. But note that Tsukasa still calls him Amane. Accepting that supernatural and dark side of Amane.

Now, he tried to find a solution to protect Tsukasa in his own way. But he also couldn't let him go. It was a selfish solution. So he preferred to make Tsukasa his yorishiro rather than letting him go or rest in peace. He couldn't bear the thought of his little brother separating from him again since they were kids and he showed his love in that way. Even if he didn't talk to Tsukasa for decades after he became his yorishiro, he couldn't let him go. So that's why maybe the solution, his way of protecting him in his perspective, had to include not separating from each other.

A small room for speculations and theories in this paragraph: Now there's this art. Amane is holding a portrait with a black ribbon which in Japan is for someone who has died and there's a picture of the moon. It could be a metaphor of Tsukasa. It also could mean several things, like Amane's possessive and twisted love because of the facial expression he's making here. But what if Amane mourns the "death" of his brother "the human side of him" after he found out about the truth? What if he wanted to protect Tsukasa's human side from the entity?

Tsukasa's POV

Tsukasa wanted to make his brother happy and always tried to cheer him up and take care of him in his own way while he was sick. Most of the time, he was the one initiating physical contact with him and Amane was shyer and less expressive than him. The balloon scene also shows how can Tsukasa act more maturely than Amane at times.

Before Tsukasa merged with the pit god, there were signs of Amane acting like the "older brother" when he did some things for Tsukasa, like reading for him because he wasn't that good at reading, However, Tsukasa was always the one trying to cheer him up when he was sick. Amane thanked Tsukasa for his efforts to make him feel better and Tsukasa asked Amane "if there was something he wanted, to let him know".

Then Amane had an emotional outburst and shoved Tsukasa, frustrated because he had better health. Despite this, Tsukasa replied very gently to Amane. Amane was feeling really bad and if he had expressed what he was feeling in a calmer way, maybe it wouldn't have lead to the conflicts between them. Tsukasa saw Amane's reaction as Amane hating him. Despite this, Tsukasa showed signs of emotional maturity and he was the one who took responsability for Amane's health.

I think that these panels show how Tsukasa and Amane despite having a hierarchy between each other where Amane's has the role of the "older brother" and Tsukasa has the role of the "younger brother", they have different emotional maturity and even though Tsukasa is more innocent and childish than Amane, he was the one who offered support to his older brother in difficult times in his own way.

Then he was in the red house and he met Kou who told him something like "He says that he hates you but it's just in the moment" and Tsukasa was ready to return to his family and let go of his own belief that Amane hates him after this. But in the end, Tsukasa was defined by the thought "Amane hates me" after this incident. Tsukasa saw the envy that Amane had towards him since this happened and also after he returned. But he also perceived that Amane wanted to spend time with him. He saw Amane protecting, guiding him and showing his affection for him in some way, maybe while they were still alive for many years, Tsukasa didn't think that Amane really hated him. However, when he turned into a yorishiro, it's shown that he still thinks that Amane hates him. We don't have enough information about Tsukasa when he was alive, but Tsukasa was extroverted while Amane was very introverted when they were in middle school.

Maybe Tsukasa tried to understand Amane, but Amane was someone who was very closed up with his feelings. He probably saw his affection in his actions "You'd prefer if I stayed here, right, Amane?", but probably something seemed off to him "Or would you rather me gone?". Maybe part of it was the envy that Amane felt toward him, maybe it was the fact that Amane perceived him differently because he merged with the pit god, maybe it was the revelation that he merged with the pit god in exchange for his health, or maybe it was all of these things. I think that Tsukasa which didn't feel envy but a genuine respect towards his brother, saw something off coming from his brother but he couldn't grasp into it. Maybe that's why he let Amane decide if he wanted him to stay or to go. Tsukasa wanted to go from's Amane's life (Maybe because he felt that Amane didn't fully accept him and also because he didn't want to bring the tragic destiny to his big brother's life). He also always wanted Amane to keep on living, that was his wish since he was 4 after all and he let Amane make the final decision.

Then Amane killed him, and then killed himself. I think that from Tsukasa's perspective, the conflict is related to the reason he thinks Amane commited the murder-suicide. In any case, it's good to point out that when Amane killed himself he disregarded the sacrifice Tsukasa made for him. Tsukasa always felt hated by Amane, and the fact of the murder-suicide, made Tsukasa believe it even more.

There are also some other things that were happening at the same time and we don't have information about them, the main point of the story, which is why was Amane's final answer to kill his brother and himself. But whatever the reason it may be, I think that from Tsukasa's perspective, Amane was selfish in the way that Amane's final decision was that he wouldn't keep on living the life he sacrificed for and he didn't respect Tsukasa's other side of the solution, that is, to go, but rather, he took away Tsukasa's life. So, Amane threw away the life Tsukasa gave him and also, he didn't let Tsukasa disappear, but rather, he killed him.

I think the scene of Tsukasa appearing after the HanaNene kiss is a clue about what happened and the conflict between them. Here Amane didn't take into account what Nene wanted. So maybe it's a parallel of how Amane didn't respect Tsukasa's wishes when they were alive.

In the analysis I made about Amane there may be hints that Amane killed his brother because he wanted to protect him from something, but he didn't take into account Tsukasa's feelings or opinions on the matter. He completely disregarded them, and made a selfish decision thinking maybe, about how to share some kind of burden his little brother was dealing with probably as the consequence of being merged with the pit god (Being a supernatural, or the sacrifices, maybe?) and also he couldn't let Tsukasa go.

In Amane’s heart, however, there was a deeper issue: he couldn't truly accept the Tsukasa who returned, the one forever changed by the merger, as the real Tsukasa. Despite this, Amane chose to believe he was real even if he wasn't completely convinced about it and that protecting him in this extreme way, would be the only way to share his burden and preserve Tsukasa's humanity. In the end, the murder-suicide was Amane’s way of "taking the easy way out" from Tsukasa's perspective, a selfish decision made under the guise of love and protection, but at the end, it denied Tsukasa’s agency and his chance to decide his own fate.

Manifestation of the Conflict Between Them

In the Trial of The Clock Keepers there's a clearer manifestation of their conflict. Tsukasa was willing to let Nene destroy him after she had destroyed The Clock Keeper's yorishiro and Amane had to tell Tsukasa the way he was feeling about him disappearing because despite Amane's selfishness, Tsukasa wants to grant his wish. He doesn't care if he dissappears, but Amane doesn't want Tsukasa to disappear.

Amane also has a problem with the way Tsukasa shows his love for him, willing to sacrifice his life like it's nothing. Amane has a dilemma of getting what he wishes for and sacrificing his brother in the process because he loves him. But Tsukasa accepted that "Amane hates him" (it didn't help one bit that Amane told Tsukasa "I hate you so much") and to him, the fact that Amane doesn't want him to disappear doesn't mean that Amane loves him.

"The final panel of one chapter and the first panel of the next both display the text, "His feelings didn't reach the younger brother he cares for" while Amane says that "He hates him so much".

The trial scene is reminiscent of when Nene and Hanako confronted each other after she saved him from Teru. Tsukasa parallels Hanako and Hanako parallels Nene. Hanako is focusing on grating Nene's wish "But your wish was this" and then Nene had to tell him to stop, that he doesn't have to grant her wish anymore. It's the same when Amane stopped Tsukasa and he told Amane "But you wanted this". Then Nene told Hanako that he "acted on his own", that he was going to extreme lengths to grant her wish and then she told him that "she hated him" but she cried and hugged him. Then Hanako understood and hugged her back.

However, in Hanako and Tsukasa's case, things were more complicated. When Amane told Tsukasa "I hate you so much", it didn't reach Tsukasa at all. Instead, he replied "Yeah? I know?" he took it literally. Hanako had a problem with Tsukasa sacrificing himself, going to the extremes to grant his wish. He didn't take Amane's feelings into consideration, because he thinks that Amane hates him. Amane was never blunt about how he truly felt about his brother. So, that's why Amane's feelings didn't reach his brother. Because he also doesn't understand how his own brother feels. The twins don't understand how the other is feeling. They never expressed the problem they had with each other.

When Amane let his feelings show, that he didn't want Tsukasa to disappear, Tsukasa responded by sharing what he believed Amane truly felt about him, he decided to open up to him and tell him what he really thought deep down: "you despise me, yet you hate the idea of never seeing me again". But how did Amane reply? "You're an impostor!!!". He completely invalidated the way Tsukasa really felt because he didn't know and he didn't understand that his little brother was defined by this idea since they were kids even before merging with the pit god. And Amane expressed what he really thought deep down "You're something masquerading as my little brother!!!". So I think what they expressed during the trial, was a more evident manifestation of their conflict and the root of the misunderstandings between them.

Maybe with the murder-suicide Amane was trying to protect Tsukasa and share a burden, but to Tsukasa, it happened because Amane didn't truly accept him as the real Tsukasa, so this confirmed to him that Amane hated him. We know that Amane's final answer was that he was going to accept Tsukasa after merging with the pit god but Tsukasa didn't see Amane's feelings and reasoning behind the murder-suicide and he thought that Amane would never truly accept him. Instead, Tsukasa saw what Amane harbored deep down, that Amane doubted whether the Tsukasa who returned was really Tsukasa at all. Perhaps it was this doubt, this uncertainty in Amane’s heart, that Tsukasa perceived and interpreted as confirmation that Amane hated him.

Conclusion

The conflict between them is related to Amane's mindset, the way they showed their love to each other and the changes Tsukasa had after merging with the pit god. Amane committed the murder-suicide, sacrificing both his brother and his future, a decision he made in an attempt to solve a problem. It was likely an act of love from Amane's perspective but the full details are still unclear. However, by doing this, he disregarded Tsukasa's wishes and feelings.

Also, throughout the story, Amane's failure to communicate his thoughts and emotions is a recurring issue. He shows his love through actions, he wants to protect his loved ones, but in doing so, he ignores what his loved ones want and that makes him selfish from Tsukasa's point of view.

Tsukasa always thought that Amane hated him, and it was deepened by the fact that he thought Amane wouldn't accept the changes he had because of not being fully human anymore. When Amane decided to kill Tsukasa and himself, Tsukasa viewed it as a selfish act, not an act of love, because Amane always keeps his feelings locked up in his heart and he never expresses himself clearly. Amane shows everything through his actions and he took away Tsukasa's possibility of making a decision. He preferred to make decisions on his own without considering what Tsukasa wanted (The same thing Nene mentioned about him).

[bbboar]

Replayed Francesco's route choosing the asshole options to get more info out of him and its further cementing my assumptions about him.

So he confirms that his family comes from a line of very successful business owners and that he is due to take charge of several new branches of the business. As a result, it's implied he is under a lot of pressure to be the perfect son in order to meet his family's expectations. I dont think its unreasonable to assume that he was probably raised with the expectation of following in his family's footsteps, whether he likes it or not.

My theory is that the reason hes under the mountain is that his usually strict family has given him a small period of freedom to get whatever he needs out of his system before he has to take the mantle of responsibility. They're not happy about it , but if it means he will calm down, behave, and then come home to fulfill his rightful duties, they will begrudgingly tolerate it.

This, of course, gives Francesco a time constraint to experience everything he possibly can in a short amount of time. As a result hes enthusiastic, eager and kind of reckless. (That and hes written like an eager new sub)

Also it makes me think: given how forward Francesco is about so many aspects of himself, i wonder if hes being secretive about his family and their business bcs theres something shady doing on? Or at the very least something that he is afraid will make Vesper look at him differently.

Maybe his family is in organised crime or something. Or maybe they got rich through exploitation. What if they're buying and demanding a supply of lunar ichor? What is they are participating in human trafficking and indented servitude? He could also be a literal prince or duke for all we know.

Anyway considering the overall tone of the game and setting im rly hoping there are some darker elements to bright sunny Francesco's route, but that remains to be seen.

EDIT: I wanted to say that i think @/dreamtydraws' theory is very plausible and it made me rethink parts of my theory but i didnt want to edit anything from the OG post so im putting it here

[raileurta]

Thinking about that post I made about Miko with the apex armor and how her going to different aus would seriously mess them up. And it got me thinking what universes of the sort would suffer the most impact from her entering them?

My first thought was Bayverse because you know ✨guns✨ and stuff but honestly they're pretty used to all types of transformer psycho bs so I think they could adapt. It might take a bit but they eventually get there. (Also if we're being completely honest here she would probably fit into this universe too well. They would get along like a house on fire and a arsonist.)

Series like tfa where everything is sillier with the bots being significantly much smaller than tfp would definitely feel more of the negative impacts of Miko. Then again in some continuities we're humans don't exist or aren't relevant there's definitely a major psychological aspect that would apply to it.

I mean how would you feel if suddenly an organic alien child constantly ready to throw hands showed up in your inderstructable relic armor? Definitely not thrilled to say the least. Like just imagine it with a world like Tf one. They just went through some major politics of the century and as Optimus is about to start attacking Megatron out of nowhere this little pink screaming thing just slams into the decepticon. I do mean very little as tf one bots are ginormous dude, Google it. What would proceed to be peak comedy, not so much damaging but definitely entertaining.

I'm not that knowledgeable about many transformers continuities. I'm really only familiar with Bayverse, Earthspark, and tfp of course. So you guys gotta lock in for me with your tf knowledge. Debate in my reblogs/comments about this; would really love to see it.

[lgbtlunaverse]

One underdiscussed aspect of the bone-deep lack of mutual understanding during the nieyao stairs scene is that Nie Mingjue doesn't know - and can't know - what he's actually asking of Jin Guangyao. Not because he doesn't understand how his father treats him, or how tenuous his position is. But because he has no clue Xue Yang is a demonic cultivator.

Remember: Nie Mingjue is still alive, which means the position of chief cultivator doesn't exist yet and Jin Guangshan is facing heavy pushback for suggesting it. Most of that is coming from a fear that the Jin will try to become the next Wen. So having an outer disciple murder an entire clan and then not even punish him properly? This is a collosally bad move politically! You might as well be waving a red flag around yelling "I want to kill other sects with impunity!" There's a reason that years in the future, the moment Jin Guangyao becomes acting sect leader, he will immediately order Xue Yang's death (He doesn't actually die, either by accident or on purpose on jgy's part. But the point is that as far as the public is concerned he had Xue Yang executed.)

From Nie Mingjue's perspective, Jin Guangshan just shot himself in the foot politically for some random outer disciple. It's morally wrong, but it's also incredibly fucking stupid. In his eyes, he is asking Jin Guangyao to do the glaringly obvious right thing, even when exclusively looking at the Jins' self-interest. The thing that surely everyone else in the Jin also wants Jin Guangshan to do! Jin Guangyao can say that he has no influence on his father all he wants, but it is obvious how much work he does and so, as much as his father may not respect him, he clearly at least trusts Jin Guangyao's competence. Nie Mingjue has already tried shouting directly at Jin Guangshan during the trial and it seemed to work, but then Jin Guangshan went back on his decision like a complete idiot. So now Nie Mingjue is asking the guy who is famous for being good at rhetoric and convincing people to convince his donkey of a father to do the obviously correct thing with minimal downsides because again, to Nie Mingjue, this is all about some random outer disciple. It makes sense to ask this! It's a pretty reasonable request! Jin Guangshan can't possibly care that much.

Except of course he does. Because Xue Yang isn't some random outer disciple. He's the only good shot Jin Guangshan has at recreating the yin tiger tally. And Jin Guangshan reaaaaaally wants the yin tiger tally. So bad that he is fully willing to tank an ungodly amount of political goodwill to get it. Jin Guangyao is fully aware that not only will Jin Guangshan never kill Xue Yang, he isn't planning on keeping him locked up either. In fact, after Nie Mingjue is dead, he'll free Xue Yang and strongarm Chang Ping into denying the guilt of his family's murderer. Jin Guangshan cares a lot about keeping Xue Yang in his employ.

And Jin Guangyao knows this. But he can't tell Nie Mingjue that! Because then he'd have to admit they've been doing demonic cultivation. That the fucking ghost geneal is in their basement. That, oopsie, they actually also killed a whole other entire clan just a while ago after framing their sect leader for an assasination attempt and then used their bodies as fodder to make more fierce corpses. You know, in case one mass murder wasn't enough!

So obviously he's not gonna say that. Which means Nie Mingjue has no idea what he's demanding from Jin Guangyao, and therefore no idea why he absolutely can't fullfill that request.

I get why it's not mentioned very often because there are a lot of other problems which are both more obvious and more fun to talk about. (Who doesn't love a little overcomplicated trolley problem?) But I think it adds just another layer to the chasm between them in this scene. They're not just disagreeing, they're having completely different conversations.