#I love talking to my dear friend about these fucked up and insane dudes!!!!!!

[lolathepeacocklord]

I could NOT imagine being a Detroit citizen in tfa !!! Imagine getting mugged by some guy in a Robin Hood cosplay and leggings !!!!!!!

[drdemonprince]

woof. your recent posts really resonate with me especially now that im making more gay and trans friends, im meeting so many cool nonmonogamous trans people that seem to have casual sex with basically all their nonmonogamous trans friends and like. its almost giving me a complex where if i think someone is cool and want to be friends with them, even if im not attracted to them, i have a perception that the only way to befriend them is to pursue them sexually. or that if they dont wanna fuck me when they fuck all their other trans friends that means there's something wrong with me (again even if i don't particularly want to fuck them!)... i love being trans and poly, and i love having more trans and poly people in my life, but sometimes i think about this one reddit comment where a dude said he noticed his gay friend had way more fun at straight bars than gay bars bc at straight bars he wasn't worrying about his appearance/body image/validation/sexual prospects

yeah honestly i get this so much and it's a very dismaying swirl of emotions to have. i don't like fucking friends. at all. it actively makes me feel unsafe and like i'm only useful to someone insofar as i'm satisfying a desire for them. it makes me feel more disposable. plus im insanely jealous if i have an actual emotional connection with someone i'm fucking so i wouldn't do well in a whole poly queer mish mosh of dear devoted friends who also sometimes bang. i would be plotting the downfall of the people i was most primed to view as a threat and sowing discord between people and shit. not good.

i also think it is a little fucking concerning when people only date/have sex as their sole way to make friends, and are only friends with people they want to fuck. this tends to create a very homogenous friend group that is heavily restricted based on desirability politics. it's also just really objectifying and unsustainable.

now i must say!! this is very much in the minority of poly people -- poly people are generally fucking AMAZING at being friends because even as just their buddy they treat hanging out with the same degree of intention and care as they would going on a date. they can hang! they want to go out and do things! they're more practiced in building a new intimacy of *any* kind than most monogamous people are.

it's just that there are some weird culty up their own ass bad boundaried polycules out there, in the same way there are abusive, codependent, jealous, miserable fucking monog couples.

but even tho most queer and poly people are more ascended than that, yeah, there is a weird unsettling constant self-evaluation that can happen in spaces where fucking almost anybody is theoretically on the table. some of that is a problem in how people treat one another, and some of that is just insecurity in between your own ears.

i get it fully. im hyper conscious of myself and how i imagine im being perceived and how people are seeing me when im out in queer spaces. and most of it is me being fully insane and making myself miserable based on nothing. because literally who cares who is attracted to me in that space and who isn't??? what matters is what i want in that moment, and my behavior, which i have control over. i should be able to just float around smiling at people and dancing and chit chatting and if someone is feeling my energy and we can talk, great, if they try to make it sexual when i dont want it to, i can just walk away. like it fully does not need to be that deep.

but it's a hard internal hurdle to overcome and every time someone hits on you, ignores you, misreads your identity, etc it can be used by your mind as fodder for The Narratives and The Insecurities and make things worse and it really has to be an intentional practice to not do that to yourself.

if you can bounce along carelessly in the straight club because you're not worrying about how people see you, you can bounce along carelessly in the queer club and not worry about how people see you. literally treat queer people the same way you'd treat straight people who seem perfectly fine but are not your problem and not a focus for you. you can stop trying to mind read the intentions of every queer person and stop sizing yourself up in their eyes and not worrying about who is fucking who and who is in love with who and who is secretly jealous but pretending not to be. and just. hang out. and feel things out. and exist in your own body and pay attention to what interests you and what you are experiencing rather than how they are experiencing you.

i say this as a reminder to myself!!

[cvnntagious]

new years appreciation !!

as the year comes to an end, there are a few specific people on here that i'd like to thank ! in my little time on here, i've made some amazing friends, and i want to really show them some love <3. i highly encourage others to hop on the new years appreciation train, no pressure whatsoever, using the '☆ sturntumblr '24 closing .ᐟ ‧₊' tag—highlighting a few of the friends you've made this year and/or kept from previous years :)

@mattscoquette — we don't talk often, but when we do, i throughly enjoy our conversations. you were one of the first people outwardly express your liking for my writing, and i'm convinced it has lead to a lot of the successes i've had on here thus far. not only did it mean a lot to me at the time, but i also still hold what you probably thought was such a simple compliment so dear to my heart. you're one of the sweetest and most genuine people i've met... all in all, i just love you

—☆

@eph3merall — you're so fucking creative, always coming up with ideas for aus i couldn't have even thought up in a dream.. i actually strive to have your imagination dude. also, i'm in love with you?? like, you're so actually so funny and easy to talk to. i usually feel soo awkward talking to people on here but i literally never felt that way talking to you... and omg thank you soso much for constantly uplifting me, i take every kind word you've said to me to heart. you're so cute it makes me wanna sob

—☆

@sturnioz — after our first real convo, i felt like i'd known you for much longer than couple minutes. you’re honestly one of my closest tumblr friends, despite not knowing each other for long, and i’m sooo lucky to have met you. you were the first and only person i followed for a while when i was new to tumblr, so when you followed me back a few months later, i genuinely jumped for joy. you're so insanely talented, in every sense of the word, and i genuinely hope you consider pursuing some sort of writing career cs your shit is so.. like, i'm dripping every time (still kicking my feet at you genuinely enjoying my content cs that was so not expected). you're actually hilarious lmfao, even if you don't mean to be. also, why are we literally the same person? we have the same thoughts, sometimes at the same time, and the same/similar takes one literally almost everything we’ve talked about so far. i was genuinely sitting there in disbelief when i was talking to you... anyways, cory forever !

—☆

@submattenthusiast — you're probably the best thing that's happened to me on here, if i'm being honest. i'm soo lucky to have you in my life. you're so sexy and silly, like, ughh i just wanna eat you all the time. i enjoy literally every conversation we have with each other and look forward to talking to you every day. i'm honored to be able to call you my girlfriend, even though you piss me off most of the time... i know you're insecure about your writing but omf, whenever you say you don't like something you've written, it makes me wanna grab your shoulders and shake you until you're dizzy. you're so fucking talented. i love everything you write, and will read anything you put out (maybe not a piss kink fic but um.. ykwim). you're literally always there for me when i need you, and i hope you know i'll always be here for you as well. if i could, i'd talk to you every second of every day, but i can't, and that really eats at me ☹️ still, i wish to spend so much more time with you for as long as i possibly can

this will be my last real post of 2024 before i begin my au special in a few days ! i love all of you guys so very much, especially my mutuals, even if i don’t talk to you often/we’ve never talked at all. see y’all next year :)

no pressure tags : @sturnsrecord @ariestrxsh @55sturn @chrissturnsfav @hoes4matthew @sweetshuga @cupiidk1lls @secretlocket @ifwdominicfike (much love to all these wonderful tagged moots) + anyone who wants to participate

-love, your grandma cvnty ☆!

[euniexenoblade]

Mordred do you have any anime or manga recommendations you havent talked about recently?

I feel like there's a lot of anime I never talk about for one reason or another, like RN I'm writing up a whole thing about maidime (maid anime) for my anime blog and if I ever get it done then yay but it's dragging lmao

But yeah, I really liked the adaptation of Children of the Whales, the world building is insane and the animation was so spectacular for a TV anime. Really stands apart from most shows.

I really like the show Erased. Time travel and time loops aren't that uncommon but still I felt that Erased found a really neat way to tackle the topic of it. It's a real fucked up story so trigger warnings for child murder and serial killer shit, but for real spectacular show. Basically there's a serial killer and dude goes back in time to be his kid self and uses his adult knowledge to try and stop the killer.

I mention this show plenty I think but I always need to sing it's praises, Humanity Has Declined is probably in my top 15 TV shows. It's such a fun, bright take on a post apocalypse and it's so funny. If you take anything away from this post, watch this show. Whenever I try to compare it to anything, the only thing I can think of is Adventure Time, it's a bright whimsical comical telling of happenings after an apocalypse. Though plot wise it's nothing like AT so, maybe the comparison isn't the best. But essentially the protagonist is a UN representative to go between the remaining humans and the newly evolved fairies. The arcs are in reverse chronological order and its lovely tbh lol.

Time of Eve is one of the first shows I really hooked into. It got rereleased as a movie, so whatever version you find is right. But it's about a world where there's robot house keepers and shit and one day the protag follows his robot to a coffee shop where robots meet and have the ability to be free. It's very nice and I should rewatch it I haven't seen it in a long ass time.

To get that yuri rep in there, if you've never watched Maria-sama ga Miteru (Maria Watches Over Us) you gotta drop your toes in. It's four seasons but you'll know if it's for you or not right away. A girl attends an all girls Catholic school and gets caught up in the student council and the personalities in it. Imo this is the premier Class S yuri and I love this series so much.

I could go on and on honestly.

As for manga, I'd say my manga opinions are very known cuz I post all sorts of screencaps and shit as I read, but considering most of that was on my old blog.

Read Liberta. Just do it. Vampire lesbian escapism fantasy. It's awesome.

The Summer Hikaru Died is a gay horror. Basically a dude's best friend goes missing and then suddenly turns back up months later. But the dude knows it's not his friend because he saw his friend's dead body in the forest. That's not a spoiler, that's like 4 pages in. It's phenomenal.

I think I see people try to disparage it these days, but Future Diary was a really good read. Dude ends up in a weird game where his cell phone tells the future and he has to kill other people who have prophetic phones (and vice versa) so they may become a new god. But on top of this one of the players is a yandere girl obsessed with being with him. The anime adaptation is good too just be ready for them to show. Too much. Watch the TV show version and not the Blu-rays, they uncensored stuff in the Blu-ray and it's such a weird decision when you see it.

Goodbye Eri and Look Back are both one shots by the Chainsaw Man author. Both deal with losing someone dear to you at a young age and both handle it in completely different ways. Both are fantastic though.

I could go on and on and on

[undeadbanjos]

Pls tell us about the divorce over fic

pffft yeah okay. but i warn, it's not as fun as it sounds. so. tw for an abusive marriage/relationship.

story time.

so those who follow me currently probably know me primarlily for being one of three people crazy over wishshipping or joey wheeler in general in the yugioh fandom. particularly writing a good 80+ chapter long fic.

however. this was not my first fic. my first fic... was for in space with markiplier.

for those who dont know, markiplier (yes, the youtuber) actually has his own series of (mostly) choose your own adventure videos. and theyre all connected. his last series of videos was split into two massive parts, and he did this q&a after it was all said and done and someone asked if he'd ever do a part 3.

he said, "no, that's up to one of you guys to write."

well after 3 days of obsessively checking ao3 no one had taken up that challenge and even though i had never written a piece of fiction in my life the hyperfixation was so strong i sat down and started writing.

and dear god something came over me. i had 8 chapters written in the span of a day.

for a while, id post two chapters a day. which is...insane. like why the fuck did i do that? but eventually i managed to narrow it down to one chapter a day (which i know is still insane and for some fucking reason is what i currently do when in my writing fits.)

being this manic long fic writer that came out of no where i started to get some attention. memes were made in support of my story. people were talking about it. hell, i started to make friends, really a first for me in fandom space. someone made a joke about making a discord server. i asked if that was a legitimate interest to anyone and i got an overwhelming yes from several people so, i made one.

my husband at the time, found out i was doing something different in my off time. i'd put the baby to bed and go to my computer and start writing. i was laughing a lot more and checking my phone a lot (for fic comments, a habit i still have while in my posting fits). finally he confronted me.

"What is it you're doing on your phone all the time?"

"I.... wrote a fanfic. I get a lot of comments."

"Is it a smut?"

annoyed, I confessed that yes, there were a few smut chapters. He asked if he could read it. I gave him the link.

he was deeply disturbed by the smut. (He didn't even read the rest of it. like....the actual story I was writing.) the smut? I mean dude you could go look at it but I mean it's pretty vanilla sex between two consenting fictional adults, but whatever. I knew he wouldn't like it. at this point in our marriage he had already stated everything I liked was annoying.

anyway. when he found out I had made friends... he got really upset. he didn't want me to have other "influences tainting my mind." i shot him back with the fact he has friends online, so why couldn't i? he didn't like it, but he warned me to be careful.

then i met sitch.

those of you who know me are nodding their head. ah, yes sitch. those who have stumbled upon this rambling probably can tell this is where the story takes a turn because i know how to set things up. by god ive written like 160 chapters of fanfiction at this point.

anywho. this guy comments on my fic and asks permission to make fanart for it. this was so fucking wild to me. fanart? for MY fic? like who would have thought. i reply enthusiastically with a yes and tell him im on tumblr so please tag me so i can see it. a few days pass and i get a dm. it's the same guy. he's made the fanart. i love it. we chat a little about the fic. about in space. about music. slowly it starts creeping into talking about life. about anything, everything. it was kinda wild how i had met someone and felt like ive known him forever. this of course, is sitch. when the discord thing came up, i decided to ask him for help, because i literally didnt even have a discord at the time.

sitch helps me with the discord. we find some mods. we open the floodgates. swear to god about 40-50 people come in. some are more chatty than others. we all chat like good friends. i update the fic daily. we all find out we relate to each other a lot. we have movie nights and game nights. i continue writing the fic, even getting help from sitch at this point. he's become sort of my beta reader. (and now he's my editor thank god the yujou means friendship people have no idea how blessed they are)

i realize. fuck. these people...really relate to me. like me even. and i like them.

and sitch....sitch in particular...i really like.

i am in deep shit.

at this point, my husband is making it well known how much he disapproves how im spending my time. not that... he wanted to spend time with me though? he locked himself in his office and would play his own games. what he didnt like is i had found people that i relate to. that i could talk to. meanwhile i was reaching the point i was afraid to say literally anything around him.

at this point, he started teasing me about "having a crush on markiplier" and he would "joke" about me leaving him for markiplier or some shit. He started arguing with me about sexuality and gender out of no where, knowing what my stance was on it.

I don't really want to get into what my breaking point was.

A few weeks went by. I started to confide in my friends, and I started to confide in Sitch. One night, my brain came up with some logic that if I told him about the feelings I was developing (because they were only growing) he would reject me and we'd laugh it off.

Unfortunately it wasn't so simple.

For a week we were in this odd stalemate. Living in different countries but talking constantly. Having essentially an emotional affair, but knowing there was nothing really to do. I had no belief that I could make it on my own, and I knew I would get a lot of backlash from my family if I were to leave my husband. The weekend came and my husband got it out of me. I had feelings for one of my online friends. And I had confessed it to him.

My husband took my laptop and went through the messages. All of them. i fled to my parents house and tried to warn sitch that he had my laptop.

The next day, my husband convinced me I needed to delete everything. The discord server. My Tumblr. Even the fic. He essentially convinced me I was at an all time low of horribleness, and I believed him.

A week later I couldn't take it anymore. I missed my friends. Id sadly felt more loved by them than anyone around me. Which yeah, is pretty damn pathetic. I left my husband, and found my friends had already made a new discord, waiting for me. They had downloaded the fic, which I slowly re-uploaded and eventually finished. And sitch and I slowly built our relationship, have now met in person, and we're hoping he's able to move down here soon.

So yeah. I wrote a Markiplier fanfic and it led to me getting a divorce. Which honestly, thank god. I don't want to think about what would have happened to me if I hadn't.

[unknownchaos]

[flies towards your current location at high speed. Tries to open your door instead of breaking it, falis miserably, trembles, and falls directly on your bed] ... So you have seen the show!! That's amazing!! Please let's rant about it and reblog posts so chat can get convinced to watch it. Also, let me hug you <3

Accepting your hug with open arms <3 also, I love the show!!! So much!!! I'm taking your "please let's rant about it" as an invitation to do so, so here's the spoiler warning for Invincible under the cut for anyone else reading this :) (Also, warning for incoherent rambling. I got a little excited)

Where do I even start? The show is incredible, and the characters are incredible, and the animation is incredible; can you tell I like the show? When my friend first recommended Invincible to me (well, it was less recommending and more telling me to watch it) I did not have high expectations. Then Omni-man turned the Guardians of the Globe into red mist?? I was sold on the show right then and there.

Right before I even got to episode 5 with Battle Beast, a friend of mine who read the comics long before he watched the show likened Battle Beast's appearance in the first season to putting Thanos up against Pre-Serum Steve Rogers in a fight. I only realized how right he was when Battle Beast absolutely massacred everybody easily.

Dude, all of episode five was just phenomenal. I mean, if it weren't for episodes 7-8, it would definitely be my favorite. Everyone was just so cool, the action sequences where just so sick. I actually paused the show when Mark went super saiyan-- everything about that scene was so insane to me.

And then the fight scenes between Omni-Man and Invincible???? Jesus, dude. For a bit of context, I had only ever known of Omni-man from Mortal Kombat and a couple of out-of-context clips that made me think he was just some Deadpool-esque superhero. I don't know if you know about his Mortal Kombat fatalities, but in one of them Omni-man grabs his opponent and does the whole "holds them up to an oncoming train" scene he does to Mark in the show. At the time, I thought it was just a cool fatality, but then he did it to Mark in the show and I lost it.

Is this where I talk about my favorite characters? I'm gonna talk about my favorite characters now. Robot/Rudy is my #1, hands down. I saw him and it was adoration at first sight. What can I say, I love robot characters. While I do understand his whole "becoming-human" arc, I have to say that I am partial to his Robot version over his Rudy version. (If that makes any sense)

I don't know how controversial this is, but Omni-man's right up there at #2. Hang on, before you block me, I just think he's a really interesting character. The tears when he flew away from Mark? The fact that he let Mark live? All the fucked up shit he's done on top of that? There's just- something about him that's so interesting to me. I want to study him under a microscope.

Allen is #3. Like with Robot, it was love at first sight. He's just so cool and a good person all around, and I KNEW they would kill him off the SECOND his "Allen the Alien" title card showed up. I was watching the show with Red and I called it out loud and she said "they wouldn't kill him off, right? They wouldn't do that." and then he died in front of us. I was devastated.

Then it comes to Amber and Eve who I love very much and they are both very dear to me. If anything bad happens to either of them ever I will need 3-4 business days to recover. [Obligatory comment about how hot they are here. Anthony obligatory comment about how Eve with the buzz cut is an underrated look.]

I could go on forever about this show, but for both of our sakes, I'll conclude this post here :) feel free to give me your thoughts as well :)))

[rateatingraccoon]

A Demonic Diary - Chapter 1

Dear diary,

Naps are great. If you ask me, they are the backbone of society. Everyone should take naps. They are a harmless way to catch up on some rest and take a good, long break. I take naps every day. Nothing strange has ever happened. Ever.

So why the fuck did I wake up in some bizzare courtroom from hell surrounded by cosplayers that are claiming to be demons? Did I accidentally leave some psychotic drugs on my nightstand? Is this some sort of nightmare? I’m pretty sure it’s a dream. I’m going to treat it like a dream to keep my sanity in check.

The “demons” have lent me a loose piece of paper because somehow they know that I enjoy writing my thoughts down. If this wasn’t definitely a dream, I would be extremely creeped out right now.

The strange thing is that I’ve tried every trick in the book to wake myself up, and none of them have worked. Worse yet, I know I’m dreaming but I can’t control the dream. I’m starting to wonder if I’m in a coma.

There were only a few of these people in the room. Apparently it’s not all of them. The first one called himself Diavolo, which I believe is suspiciously close to Diablo. I have only ever heard of horses being named Diablo. However, Diavolo seemed much happier than any horse I’ve ever met, so I accept that he is, in fact, not a horse.

Besides that, he was pretty friendly. Promised I’d be taken care of here in the “Devildom”. My brain is certainly being creative today. He also claimed to be the prince of hell, which is fun. I wonder if there’s as much gambling down here as I’ve predicted.

Speaking of hell, this old dude named Lucifer hates me calling it hell. I hope he doesn’t find these papers, because he promised I would be safe but, considering the way he talks to my caretaker, I don’t really trust him not to snap my neck.

There were three others there. They called themselves Satan, Asmodeus, and Beelzebub. They’re the avatars of the seven deadly sins, apparently. Good thing I’m not religious, or else I might have had a seizure at the sound of those names.

All three seemed alright. Asmodeus especially. He made me feel welcome, though I’m pretty sure he’s trying to get into my pants. I’ll have to keep an eye on him, even if I want to become friends with him.

Satan looks like a basic ass white boy, but he has some good vocabulary, at least. I can tell he reads. I bet he was a Warrior Cats kid. If he was, I think we’ll get along. I can even tell him about the characters I made when I was really young.

Beelzebub scares me. A lot. He’s buff and his name is scary and he wants to eat me. I think my fear of him is justified.

Anyways, in this dream I’m part of some exchange program. I really hope I’m not going insane. They also mentioned school. I really hope I don’t have to take math classes all over again.

The demon brother (yeah, Mr. Scary Old Man has six brothers, his three accomplices being half of them) that was apparently told to watch over me is called Mammon. He’s a jackass, but I didn’t protest. I was kind of in shock, so I’ve pretty much been being pulled around by him all day. I saw a glimpse of some of the other brothers, one in particular - some guy with overgrown blue hair - giving us a glare. I really hope this isn’t some gang of criminals playing pretend.

Well, now I’m here, writing with a feather quill by candlelight like some medieval mistress writing letters to my lover. Man, that makes me feel lonely. I hope that if this dream doesn’t end I’ll get to be friends with some of these skallywags. Perhaps they’re more brother than demon.

I doubt it, though.

Love &lt;3

(Hope you enjoyed this early access first chapter! I'll be posting the chapters separately, so around chapter ~3 I'll make a masterpost linking all the chapter in order. Much love!)

[amalgamgooze]

making a text-based adventure game is hard

I've realized that maybe the RPG that I was working on was a little ambitious for what resources I had.

For such limited time (and patience), I've realized that maybe I'll need to postpone any work on a game of such caliber for a bit...

Fortunately, I've found myself enjoying a new genre of games as of late--visual novels and other narrative-heavy games.

"Oh god," you yelp. "My *absolutely-favoritest* blogger has fallen to the clutches of lust!"

Not to worry, my friends. I'm not playing *that* type of visual novel.

I'm talking about Disco Elysium and Kyle is Famous and Night in the Woods.

And I'm also really digging the aesthetic of the Windows PowerShell window I have to use to install Python packages.

"I've got big things planned for this game,"

the foolish never-would-be game dev announced.

"This game will change the industry--it'll change the way the common man sees video games,"

the developer self-awarely pretentiously claimed. They might be a little crazy, but they still knew that changes as big as those wouldn't happen as a result of their little game.

But then I come back down to reality.

Changes as big as those don't *have* to happen as a result of my game.

In fact, I could make this game just for myself.

Nobody else would ever have to play it.

...

But then I'd miss out on all the fun of sharing my works with the world.

I'd miss out on the "what were you thinking here" shared laughs moments,

I'd miss out on the "only someone on drugs would write something like this" compliments,

I'd miss out on all of it.

...

And also making a game of this sort of nature kind of implies I'll be able to get my mom to play *a* video game.

...

Did you know that making a text-based visual novel adventure game is somewhat difficult?

Even if you know how to do classes and object-oriented programming and such?

I've spent a good part of today literally just drawing diagrams of how inheritance of locations is going to work in this game.

Dude. You have to start down at the *text* level and work your way up.

It's... interesting, to say the least.

And I'm sure my methods aren't exactly the best. Yet.

I'm fully prepared to have to scrap it all in favor of a more efficient, cleaner organization method.

...

Prepare for total .JSONification. All things must be JSON.

Everything you love. Everything you hold dear.

I.

Will.

Make.

It.

JSON.

...

Anyway, yeah. I'm going to probably be spending 10 hours a day on average coding for the rest of my life, with my jobs and my hobbies and my projects and my everything.

Fuck, I've accidentally made an interesting image filter for my internship while trying to detect edges using a custom-made gradient algorithm.

That means only one thing--I have the capability to program my own shit for Aseprite and Krita.

...

And it'll all make my art so much easier.

...

And what about music?

What if I make an algorithm that helps me continue the song when I'm stuck and don't know what to add next?

Based on what I've learned in Music Theory?

...

It's daunting that the possibilities are now endless, I suppose.

But at the core of it all?

Where everything began?

...

It was some radical dream in which I so vehemently desired to make a game.

To get my story out there in turn-based RPG form.

A dream that formed well over 7 years now.

And will continue to grow and form.

...

Some radical dream that persuaded this what-would-otherwise-be-just-another-sterile-passionless-STEM-major into taking weird classes like Art and Music Theory and Modern Drama in an immensely passionate pursuit of realizing their insane dream.

You know.

Instead of just focusing on what's important.

...

I could probably be saving *more* lives with more dedication to, oh, I don't know--cancer research? Biotech?

...anything productive?

But instead here I sit, wasting my potential by making stupid games.

...

I don't think my games are *stupid*, per se.

However, when you compare the societal impact of a video game to something like cancer research, well...

I'm just ashamed!

My priorities aren't in the right places, it seems--!

...

But don't try to console me.

I've already convinced myself that even though games might not better society in the same way medical research does, and even though I'm a terrible person for wanting to waste my potential, it's still what I want to do.

Hah.

And so they look in the mirror, at peace with the fact they're a terrible person in the eyes of some.

But in the eyes of others, and even sometimes the same people, they're triumphant.

They're doing shit they physically should not be able to.

They continue to defy expectations.

The logic of the world has gone to shit, and the reflection in the mirror somehow proves this point.

I should not exist in the capacity that I do.

And...

...

I believe I've made my argument that a narrative-based game from me would be, at the very least, interesting.

...

And I totally didn't just have an unprofessional breakdown-rant in typed format.

...

def generateNewBreakdown(self, _subject:str=None) -> str:

...

On an unrelated note, I'm really starting to become attracted to the way Python code looks.

It's not a sexual attraction to the way the code looks.

Yet.

[idontplaytrack]

Hey lovely little gay person in my phone I’m here to make a request

Alright the holy trio that is Janis Damian and reader please

Janis and reader separately going to Damian about their gay panic for each other and Damian tells Janis to shut up and kiss her(reader) already

Janis talking to Damian over a rehearsal/jam session

Reader talking to him in theater or something

I don’t know lol

✧ Playing Cupid

Janis ‘Imi’ike x fem! reader

Warnings: coarse language, fluff

In which Damian literally has to bring his two best friends together because they are too scared to say the words to each other

“Okay, Janis? Why are you bouncing your leg so much?”

Janis chuckles wryly, tossing her phone aside. Damian brings is focus completely to his friend.

“Nothing.”

“Bitch, you are lying. So spill, just tell me what’s bothering you.” Damian looks at her with raised brows.

“Um.” Janis sighs, fingers randomly picking at the strings of her bass guitar to avoid the eye contact. She could feel him staring. “I��need help with how to tell y/n I like her. I’m scared she’ll say no if I ask her out even though we’ve been kind of flirting.”

“Oh dear Lord.” Damian laughs, “I think you have nothing to worry about.”

“And how do you know that?”

“Because she’s your best friend?” Damian rolled his eyes playfully.

“Not helping.” Janis puffs out her cheeks, frustrated.

“Alright, then. You tell me— how do you want me to help?”

“I don’t know!” Janis exclaimed.

“Ughhh.” Damian grumbled, “Any ideas on how you’d want to confess to someone you like? Just hypothetically.”

Janis rolled her eyes, “What?”

“Well, how else am I supposed to help if I have no idea what you have in mind?”

“Well—” Janis says hesitantly, fiddling with her fingers, “I always imagined that I’d do it with a song. Of course in my mind, the person has always been y/n.”

“Of course it has.” Damian guffaws.

“Excuse me?” Janis glares at him.

Damian shot her a look, “You aren’t very subtle.”

Janis exhales harshly, getting up and pacing around the garage. “Oh, come on! You literally just told me that y’all have been flirting. And not just kinda.” Damian continues.

“I mean, if you say so.”

“If I say so?” Damian snorted, “Cady literally said to your face: ‘the tension between you and y/n is insane, Janis. Are you sure you guys aren’t more than friends?’ And then, y/n blushed. So please, unless you’ve suddenly gone blind, you’re just plain oblivious.”

“It’s fucking scary, dude.” Janis exhales harshly, “What if she’s just doing it for fun, the flirting? What if she doesn’t feel the same way and she gets freaked out by me and decides to stop talking to me, stops even just being my friend?”

“SHE BLUSHED.” Damian stares at her in disbelief, “y/n blushed— that’s all the confirmation you need.”

“Whatever, I can’t think about it anymore right now.” Janis says in response, grabbing her guitar and starting to play it.

The next day, Damian was in acting class with you. The second he saw how you were rushing up to him, he knew exactly what you were going to ask him. “Oh, you two really are made for each other.” He mumbles. “What?” You squinted at him, puzzled.

“Nothing, nothing. What is it?”

“Never mind.” You shrugged, taking your seat on the floor. He sits down beside you as usual.

“If you say so.” He teased. You sigh, grabbing a script that they were passing around.

————

After acting class, you went to get frozen yogurt with Damian. Well, he dragged you there with him. “Okay, I can’t take this. You’re obviously bothered by something.” Damian started knowingly, “Talk.”

“I think I have feelings for Janis.” You muttered, stirring the toppings of your froyo while staring intently at the cup of dessert.

Though annoyed by his friends’ cluelessness, he still listens. “Okay, so…what are you gonna do about that?”

“I don’t even know what to do with myself whenever she looks at me.” You shove a spoonful of the yogurt into your mouth. “I feel like a crazy person, heart beating out of my chest, words don’t come out of my mouth right. So I just shut up now.”

“Oh God.” Damian looks at you, “You are a lost cause.”

“Tell me about it.” You glared at him playfully.

“You’re going to the spring fling right?”

“Of course. With you and Janis.”

“Okay.” Damian shrugs. As he raised his spoon to have another mouthful of the treat, his phone buzzes in his pocket. He glances at you, looking out the window, leaning against the back of the chair fully before he fished his phone out.

He rolled his eyes and bit back a grin. As frustrating as it seemed to him, that feeling was dying down. He was starting to like the fact that he could play cupid. Of course, you and Janis being so clueless helped because he could take full control of it and just give you two the biggest shocks of your lives. And then of course, seeing his best friends finally get together would be so satisfying to him.

“I’m headed to Janis’ after this. You wanna come with me?”

“Janis’? Hell no.”

“Oh, why not?” He jokes.

“I told you why. I’m a fucking mess around her. Been staring at her like a creep too, so no way I’m subjecting myself to more awkwardness. She’s so—”

“Alright, fine. Go home and daydream more about a future with Janis, I suppose.”

You couldn’t help but smile at that. He smirks, and ended up laughing. “I really gotta make this happen, don’t I?”

“What devious plan are you cooking up right now?” You chuckled over your words.

“Wait and see, babe. Wait and you shall see.” Damian tells you, “Rest assured, you won’t be disappointed.”

After both of you finished your desserts, you and Damian went your separate ways for the night. “See you at school tomorrow.” He gives you a hug from the side.

“Good night, Damian.” You hug him back then turn to leave, looking over your shoulder to give him one last wave.

On his way to Janis’, Damian gets them both burgers and fries for their dinner. He lets himself in, knowing that Janis would’ve left the door unlocked. Like always. “Hey.” Damian greeted.

“Hi, dude.” Janis’ face lit up briefly, “Ooh, what’d you get?”

“Burgers and fries.” He answered.

“From the usual place?” Janis peeked into the bags, “Yum.”

“Okay, so…I have an idea for you to make use of to confess.” Damian began, “The spring fling’s coming up. y/n said she’s definitely going, with us. Meaning she doesn’t have a date, and you, should sign up to perform during the dance,”

“Just me?” Janis scoffs.

“I’m not gonna be the one singing her a love song. You are, bitch.” Damian gasps.

“Well— yeah. Wait— a love song?”

“Does she have one she likes?” Damian asked, “Or what’s one you like and feel confident singing?”

“Actually…” Janis got to retrieve a composition book from her desk. “I wrote a little something.”

“Well damn!” Damian’s eyes widened in surprise, taking the book from her. He flips it open to the dog-eared page. “Fuck, it’s good. Janis, this is amazing.”

“No…”

“Janis, it is beautiful.” Damian insists, “We’ll finish this up. You have to sing this for her.”

“You really think so?”

“I’m not gonna play about something like this.” Damian nods, “You two belong together. I mean it. I’m going to whatever it takes to make it happen.”

“Thanks, Damian.”

“Okay, let’s get to work!” Damian declared excitedly, grabbing a pencil from the container near him.

The both of them stayed focus for nearly a whole hour before they stopped working. Janis had to go to the bathroom, and Damian, he gets a text— from you.

“Hey, what are you gonna wear to the dance?”

“I don’t know yet, now that I’m gonna be singing on stage in front of literally the whole school, I probably need to do better than just make changes to last year’s purple suit.” Janis grabs her composition book and pencil again, deep in thought. “You?”

“No idea, girl. We’re cutting it a bit close, don’t you think?” Damian sighs, “I’m might just wear the same suit from last year. Who can tell, anyway?”

————

“So, Janis will be wearing purple suit, I’ll get one in a different shade that I like.” Damian explains, “Which means you gotta go for purple too if we wanna match.”

“Oh, yay.” You nodded eagerly, “It’ll be easier for me to think of something now that it’s narrowed down a little.”

“Great. So, how we doing today?”

“Don’t even ask. You already know.” You bit back a laugh.

“Hey!” Janis’ voice made you whip your head around so fast to look at her. “Hey.” You smiled, swallowing harshly. Damian couldn’t help but laugh, earning a squint from Janis.

“Let’s get to homeroom.” Damian ignores that, though. Damian sits behind you, and he keeps seeing Janis steal glances at you. He couldn’t resist sneaking a few pictures that he’d eventually send to you both. Of course, neither of you knew that yet until later on.

The school day went by pretty uneventfully, you’d successfully avoided any snarky shit Regina spews at students around you. As uneventful as it could. Janis was making you feel so damn flustered every time. And she wasn’t even doing anything. Well, nothing out of the ordinary.

The three of you found yourselves in Janis’ garage after class. Once she stepped inside, she immediately panicked and rushed to pick up her composition she’d left scattered on the floor with some pens and highlighters, putting it in her desk’s drawer. You found that a little weird, it wasn’t as if either of you haven’t seen the contents of the book before. But hey, you weren’t going to ask because Janis was a little weird. Though, a very cute weirdo in your eyes.

“Let’s just watch a movie and play some games. What else do we do anyway? Get high?”

Janis laughs heartily, “That is true, though. What else do we do really? Eat, watch movies, play some games, jam out, sometimes— we get a little high.”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way, bitches.” Damian sighs with a laugh, “Sit down. Whose turn is it to pick a movie?”

“Her.” You and Janis said in sync, pointing at each other.

“Jesus.” Damian took in a deep breath, “Ladies, only one of you is right.”

“You can pick.” Again, in sync.

“Rock, paper, scissors. Whoever wins, picks.” He decided. Janis wins, so she picks. She picks one of your favourite movies. Damian immediately notices, secretly squealing at this little gesture.

Since it was Friday night, you stayed over. Damian said goodbye and good night then, he leaves. “y/n, I’ll see you tomorrow for acting class. Then we will see you at the mall, Janis.”

“See ya, g’night.” You gave him a little smile.

“See you tomorrow, dude. Night.” With that, Janis shuts the door.

Now alone, Janis didn’t really know what she wanted to do. Even though she was the one who asked you to stay over. “So…” Janis clears her throat nervously, “What do you wanna do?”

You took the risk and sat closer to her. You haven’t been able to bring yourself to do that in the last few weeks at least without feeling like your heart might jump out of your chest. She doesn’t resist, letting you lean onto her. “I dunno.” You answered, leaning your head on her shoulder, “I’m sleepy.”

“Maybe we should just get to sleep.” She says softly and you feel her eyes on you so you don’t look up like you usually do.

“I can sleep. You can do whatever you want if you aren’t tired.” You chuckled lightly knowing that she was a night owl.

She smiles but you don’t see it, somehow, she’s guided you to lay your head on her lap without you even realising it until you had your head in her lap. “Go to sleep. I’m gonna stay up for awhile and just work on a piece I’ve been trying to complete.”

“Okay.” You said back, barely audible. “Sorry, I gotta go grab that book from my desk.” She gives you a sheepish smile. You moved and let her get up, “Get back here though.”

‘Oh, shit. Why? Why’d I say that?’ You mentally slapped yourself for your bluntness.

She laughs, turning her head away from you for a second, “I’m just gonna be a sec, y/n.” Janis grabs a pen along with the book and came back to the couch. You’d began to doze off while she started working on whatever that was. “Good night, Janis.” You say, snuggling against the couch cushion.

“Good night.��� She says, looking at you. Then, she leans over and presses a kiss to your forehead. Your eyes nearly shot open at that, but you kept them close to avoid the increasing nerves. And obviously, avoid getting caught freaking the fuck out. Were you happy? Oh, fuck yes. You just…cannot believe it.

————

Soon, the day of the spring fling came around. The three of you showed up to school, together in matching purple outfits— Janis and Damian were wearing suits, while you, wore a dress. They slipped away to go prep for their performance, leaving you alone in the front of the crowd. You stood there, watching them get ready with a cup of fruit punch in hand and your phone in the other. You naturally snapped a few photos of them along the way, and the whole place. It was something you usually did. So it wasn’t just that you wanted to keep photos of Janis.

“Good evening, North Shore.” Mr. Duvall took the mic after some time, “Welcome to the spring fling. Seniors, this will be your last one. Make good choices, make great memories. To kick things off, we have a performance by Janis ‘Imi’ike, singing a song that she wrote herself— ‘Feels Like Home’. Accompanied by Damian Hubbard on the piano. They will also be your emcees for the evening.”

Students around you started speculating who the song was about, but a few of them knew it was for you. Cady and Gretchen specifically, who were actually standing right near you. The dead giveaway, was Janis looking at you as she sang, any chance she could.

You couldn’t fight the tears for long, eventually just giving in and weeping while you watched them perform. Having Janis sing pretty much directly to you. “Oh, my God.” You sniffled, swiping your tears away.

“This is so sweet.” Cady remarked. You nodded, tears falling from your eyes without an end or regards for other students who may have been looking at you.

A few minutes later, the song ends. She thanks the crowd and introduced the next act before getting off stage. You weaved through the crowd to locate her and immediately tackled her with a hug, still in tears. Janis breaks away, holding your face in her hands, crashing her lips onto yours. A shocked as you were, relieved and pure joy washed over you when she did it. You instinctively kissed her back, smiling into the kiss.

“Oh, finally. It’s exhausting trying to play cupid.” Damian commented when you and Janis broke away eventually. She laughs and so did you. “I guess we owe you a thank you.” Janis hugs him from the side. “Oh, yeah. Big time— but this is more than enough. Seeing you two finally realise your feelings for each other and get together. I was this close to yelling at you to just kiss her already.”

“I did.”

“I know. You just did.” Damian laughs.

“Not right now.” Janis confirms.

Damian gasps dramatically, “What? When?”

“We uh— last weekend. Got a little drunk and um, did more than that actually.” Janis revealed. Damian was damn near getting a coronary on the spot. “No wonder y’all left me on delivered for like two hours. Damn! Looks like I was wrong, y’all aren’t that clueless after all. Love that we are so past the TMI stage that you can just tell me that so casually. Nearly blacked out, but you go girl.”

You stood behind Janis and hid your face in her shoulder. She laughs, wrapping an arm around you. “Look at that, so cute.” Damian gushed, looking at Cady and Gretchen.

Gretchen squealed, walking closer, “That was such an amazing performance, Janis. We loved it.”

“Aw, thanks, Gretch.”

“You two look adorable together.” Cady says, “I’m glad you two finally are together now.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, we knew. It was infuriating watching you two flirt all the time and not realise the flirting.” Cady told you.

“Sorry to put you through that, but here we are now.” Janis couldn’t stop grinning, “Let’s go get some drinks, shall we?”

🏷️ Tag list:

@ashecampos @auliisflower @cheesysoup-arlo @frogs00 @reneeswif3 @ludoesartnstuffs @pda128

💭A/N:

It’s 2 in the morning. I need to sleep lmao🤡 my sleep schedule is so wrecked.

[itsjaywalkers]

UMMMM NOTHING HAPPENS???

Dude. This, you’ve done something with this.

Like the first part REGGIES ADORABLE, and they’re obvs already soulmates, and it’s setting the Sirius dynamic. Like especially with James and Sirius, I think it’s a fun way to explore their friendship, and James’ inability to say no.

THEN THE NEXT PART! JAMES MY LOVE YOU.ARE.JELOUS!!!!!! Like my guy. The “baby”, James please have a conscious thought. The beef between Pandora and Sirius is so real <3. But it’s interesting to see like another sibling haver perspective on Sirius and Reg cause James is just James. Like it’s speaks a lot about everyone’s dynamic I think how everyone interacts with the twins (Love them but the way, your Evan is <333)

THEN THE LAST PART. HOLY SHIT. Like i thought they were about to have a cute moment (which i guess they did) but then BAM “what about your girlfriend?”. It was like a record scratch in my brain. I’m very excited to get Regs’ side of the story, and James is my bbg i’ll always defend him even if he sucks, if James said it was a platonic make out session, it was a platonic make out session. (I’m kidding he’s being a dick) BUT THE “You’re my best friend” while they were literally sucking face. Babe. Please. AND WHEN HE CALLED OUT WOLFSTAR, you have literally no room to talk. Like at all. But like, him being like “Em. Babe. ur overreacting” While reg was literally cuddled up in him. LIKE WHAT JAMES? THATS INSANE!

But like based of what you’ve posted IDK, but it’s different than what I expected?? (in a good way). Like the characterization is so compelling in this! I’m very excited for this and am very patiently waiting for the next part, in the meantime i’ll be re reading and finding even more insane bits i missed i’m sure.

(sorry for rambling, but thank you lots for writing <3)

NEVER APOLOGISE FOR RAMBLING and this ask made my day, i couldn't answer until now bc i've been shopping all morning/afternoon but !!! i read it as soon as i woke up and it made me <3 so very happy <333

ELEVEN YEAR-OLD REGGIE IS SOOOO CUTE i need to put him in my mouth and . chew . he's so very dear to me i swear <333 i also love his dynamic with sirius and all the banter between james and sirius was so fun to write. their friendship sort of . deteriorates . in a way . bc of regulus and both sirius and james' inability to share, so i'm glad i got to write them like this before that, like proper best friends!!!

HE'S SO FUCKING JEALOUS IT'S ACTUALLY CONCERNING the 'baby' was playing soooo dirty and so manipulative of him. and i'm so glad u enjoy sirius and pandora's rivalry bc it's one of my fav things in nothing happens hehe. and yessss james has a very . close-minded view of siblings, in a way, since he's an only child and he's never gonna understand what goes down in those kinds of bonds. so getting to see the twins and how they behave and interact with others helps with james' lacking perspective imo!! also nothing happens evan is my baby, i'm so happy u like him <333

THE LAST PART IS THE WOMAN OF THE HOUR I THINK so intense so hot so dramatic <3 the mention of james' gf IS supposed to hit, bc despite the fic being from his pov, he never thinks about her until reg mentions her, which is . wild . if u stop to think about it . idk if we'll ever get reg's side of the story bc nothing happens works better bc it's james-centric but !! who knows !! i'd love to write his pov of some moments for sure (and share more content of the twins too). also i'm so surprised to see how much ppl are loving nh james??? he's gonna get worse, so idk how long this will last but i'm quite pleased so far bc i adoreeee him. HE'S SUCH A PIECE OF SHIT DURING THAT WHOLE CONVO telling his literal gf she's overreacting when he has reg seated on his lap, telling reg he's his best friend after having his tongue down his throat . he's insane . especially bc he believes every single word coming out of his mouth

oh i'm so glad ur liking it despite the story not being what u expected (so relieved it's in a good way tho). the characterizations in nothing happens are what make the fic super compelling to me too so <3 taking this as a huge compliment <3 i'm gonna go back to writing oby + a pandalily pwp now so idk when the next part will be ready but !! since nothing happens is what i always write on the side bc it comes quite easy to me, it could be done sooner than it seems. we'll see!!

thank you so much for reading and for sending such a lovely ask, it means the whole world MWAH <333

[shoezuki]

(twitter bullshit ahead) So the reason why ranboo was uncharacteristically quiet in today's stream was because he was taking his final. The amount of tweets I saw that were getting excited over ranboo being quiet "because he didnt want to stream or talk to techno" were too much and it came across as brainless. I understand ranboo has the spine of a grass blade, and he cares too much about his twitter fanbase specifically, but I'm happy he made tweet, (even if it isnt that deep of a tweet) so no false info would spread about why he was quiet.

I used to watch ranboo all the time because I thought he was a cool dude and an awesome streamer, but seeing him care too much about what his fans think of him (sometimes dude cares more about his public image than dream istg) and seeing him avoid talking/interacting with his "problematic" friends makes me just not interested to watch him anymore if all he cares about is the opinions of the worst side of twitter. At the bare minimum, at least he still has a close public friendship with phil

oh yea i feel you tbh like. yea i feel you. i honestly like. dont watch ranboo so much anymore either n i Still Like him a lot but most of all i feel bad for him

hes like. his fans have very heavily forced him into this sort of White Knight persona with him being Perfect and like that shit interpreting anything he does as 'proof' he hates those Nasty Bigoted ccs like techno. truly hes treated like a puppet by them n they jus bend him however he likes

i WOULD love for him to just. tell them off bluntly. but he really DOES care so fuckin much bout how hes perceived kinda like dream is in a similar regard. probably jus w how Huge he blew up so quickly. and its So obvious he has such insane anxiety w that like i recall that stream he had 'addressing' those jokes of him dressing like a lesbian and like. shit dude it was hard to listen to like he was So Fucked up by this non issue

to me it feels like he walks on eggshells. by makin a tweet to explain hes Just Tired he Obviously sees the ppl 'theorizing' that he fuckin hates techno n like. he Sees That Shit. but doesnt want to flat out be like 'stop that techno's my friend' so he says other things in the same efforts. n like part of me would LOVE him to jus flatout be like Technos my Homie. but also he shouldnt Have To.

altho like i HOPE we get more a them together in streams. n im expectin such considerin techno got Lore Plans now n dear god i Want the ranboo n tehcno duo together more. both cuz Good and maybe to stick it to those fuckers.

[syubub]

May 13th Reading

Definitely long awaited and way bigger than I intended it to be so buckle up.

Funky disclaimer: this is for entertainment purposes only and not to be taken as fact! This is my interpretation of the cards!

Oh boy. The continuation of yoongis soulmate saga.

(Note frome future me: it's not proofread but I'm hungry. Sorry for mistakes!)

So so so so

Let's start.

I started with all the normal jazz. Connecting with his energy and shit. Same as usual same old same old. Platform= same same. I was like, "hey, let's talk about your soulmate and the whole may 13th shit" and we connected via energy stringy thing to the forehead and such. I was intresting bc my end of the string was kinda my energy color! Neato. Looks like some rest has really done me good!

Okay, here's where I start actually asking shit. I made notes at this point before the reading as I usually do. I'm just gonna insert the screen shot here.

The 14 thing really fucked me up. You'll see later. Also, when I got the whole Pisces Jupiter thing I had to do me some googling bc we established that Jupiter went into Pisces ON May 13th so I was like?? Am I missing something?

I was. I forgot that it goes retrograde and then co.es back to Pisces on December 28th. And I do indeed think it to be significant.

The shit about temperance makes a lot of sense. In yoongis first soulmate read I flipped my shit bc he was like, "You're gonna get temperance reverse" in regards to a card for his soulmate and I was like "pft whatever. Don't play me like that"

And then I got temperance reverse. It's been a significant card from the jump.

I asked him if he had any advice for his soulmate and that's what "Don't wait for big things, you'll miss the small ones that lead you to bigger things" and "Look for facts before assuming" and "Don't try pushing it, forcing it won't make sense" and "A spade is a spade/ ace is an ace" and "Don't make ill informed guesses" all were

Now this part:

"Union has happened , yet to on the physical"

Gave me some hints thankfully because he straight up said no more hints.

This ties back into the whole Jupiter thing too. The seeds are/ have been planted and now they have to grow before they can be harvested.

Well Mr. Yoongi, I'm impatient and I don't want to wait. I want to see you in love pronto.

Anyways

He showed me a little dream box/ trinket box looking thing and a super vague Keychain with no further explanation... so... there's that I guess.

I can't quite decide if "Don't make ill informed guesses" was a tongue-in-cheek pike at me or if it was genuine advice to his soulmate? He just loves to not explain things.

Now let's begin the monster read.

So. The first row of cards

I asked the question, "what the fuck was May 13th and what was it's purpose in regards to your connection"

Important is what it was lol. I interpret this as them finding their footing and this being the starting point of the genuine foundation being layer. Like they've been manifesting eachother for a while but May 13th marked the start of them making the real life changes in their actual lives that will be the set up for them meeting.

The seven of coins is about thoughtful planning and creating security/ stable plan. The tower is essentially ripping away anything and everything that was built on unstable foundation and challenging/ testing your character (an extremely rude awakeing if you will). Judgement is releasing the past so you can rise above it and confronting yourself as you are (Also legit awakening) the queen of coins is financial security and self confidence in your abilities. Ten of coins is prosperity and abundance and most of all, stability. Eight of wands is explosion of potential and rapid movement. Temperance is awareness and balance between physical and spiritual. It's also that quiet peace where you find balance.

So. Seeing all those cards it really does seem like maybe his soulmate took on something new that could lead straight to union? Same for yoongi. I'd like to analyze and recent or new-ish habits or hobbies he's picked up?

Moving right along though. I asked what the 13th did for each of them in their personal life and personal journey. Kinda like what came as a result of that energy? Let's start with yoongles

This was really intresting to me. I think he definitely gained some form of clarity about the situation with that sun card. The 5 of cups tells me that either he was kinda forced to confront some of his flaws in a way that he was trying to avoid or he had to consciously let go of something dear to him? Could be something he had to leave behind because it crumbled with the tower moment but he didn't see it coming or didn't know that it was time to part with it? With that queen of wands though fits beautifully with the sun! Its like he's found warmth after a long winter. Definitely found a spark of compassion and generosity from a place of happiness and love rather than anger, fear, obligation or pitty.

I asked for clarity cards/ anything else that may 13th signified bringing in and we got the 2 of cups and 10 of swords. I have two thoughts. Either he let go of a relationship that he was already in because he didn't feel as though they were particularly compatible anymore (Also ties into the above section) OR the 13th had made him very much consciously aware of his soulmates incoming status and he is now preparing and working on himself for when this person comes. The 10 of swords would be him releasing the past and the pain and any ill fitting behavior that don't vibe with him any longer. Yellow really seems to be working for him by the way.

Soulmate time

Lol. All signs point to his soulmate genuinely starting a new venture. New creative pursuit that will bring them good money. 10 of pentacles is abundance, prosperity and stability. The ace of wands is a new creative spark and passion and it's the first big steps into something new. The 2 of wands is "the world is in the palm of your hands" vibes. Choices need to be made swiftly and with the ace of wands I think they will be. With the heirophant too, it will be a well informed decision because they've been manifesting this and has been searching for all the possible information.

As for clarity, we have the moon. Damn. Soulmates been doing that shadow work. Dredging up all their bullshit and getting rid of it while still taking the time to sit with it and release it so nothing is unresolved. Also probably extra creative due to all the emotional baggage being thrown out. (Definitely helping with the ace of wands vibes tbh)

Now for the bad boys in the middle

The question I asked is what those individual changes (detailed in the last two sections) will bring for the bond and I just can with them. These fuckers. I am so invested in their love story bc it's so... them? And just so fucking ROMANTIC. UGH I CAN'T.

Back to the point. High priestess, 4 of wands and the lovers. The high priestess is deep knowing and insane intuition, the 4 of wands is the purest joy and marriage and the lovers is well, the lovers.a magical union.

FUCK DUDE I NEED THIS TO BE A ROMCOM.

For the row of bottom cards

I asked if they had anything at all to add so I'm gonna explain each card individually bc I think they could be individual tid bits of shit.

Knight of coins is good news about finances/ money looking promising and organized work (also dependability!!). Death is all about transformation, the beginning of a new chapter and accepting in order to move foward. Ace of coins is spiritual and material abundance and also a reminder to keep grounded. Page of swords is confidence, important news coming and really good insight! Roots out secrets or hidden things like a truffle pig. The star is promising potential, healing and guidance from an enexpected place. The two of cups is a soul connection, love, intuition especially in regards to another person and a good bind. The emperor is self awareness, foresight, fearlessness to achieve a goal and confidence. Eight of coins rev is poor discipline and skating by on low effort.

Now to the sides!

Yoongi is the left, soulmate is the right.

So, let's begin with yoongi. The first two cards are anything he wants to say to his soulmate. Wheel of fortune and three of swords reverse. I take this as "its all in divine time/ it's destiny" (wheel of fortune) and "trust your intuition. It's okay to get hurt, you just need to remember you can always pick yourself up" (3of swords rev.)

We have now cards that I asked what he was learning through this process/ in this time. Be positive and first step.

The last two cards are affirmations he wants to give his soulmate.

"When I introduce joy to a situation, I change the vibrational frequency of what's happening around me" and "directing my focus onto what's thriving creates more of what I want"

Now for soulmates cards (same structure)

Strength and eight of swords. "You're stronger than you think. Take every part of yourself and acknowledge it. You're a force to be reckoned with" (strength) and (soulmate snapped at him on this) "the only thing holding you captive is you."

Now we have peer pressure (I think soulmate is learning to say "fuck you" and "fuck off" to people who have a set idea of how everyone should be living their lives), emotional healing and open your arms to receiving.

Then we have "its good to feel good" (lol I feel like yoongi definitely needs this one) and "when I connect to the spiritual realm, I open the door to recieve divine guidance, clear direction, and great wisdom"

The last stretch my friends.

So. Completion, leave behind the things that no longer serve you. Exist in the present and don't keep mulling over the past or any future happenings. Magic, pay attention to the magic around you. Listen for the signs of the universe and take them as they come (essentially listen to divine guidance) . Be open minded but logical as well. Luminous warrior, try focusing on the good in yourself instead of berating yourself for every small flaw. Spiritual path, self explanatory. The blade, your power can be a weapon when used willy nilly (most often wounding the wielder) or it can heal. Don't fear it but also consider how you choose to utilize it. The give away, be greaful for the sake of being greatful for it, not because you want something in return. The rain maker, manifestation station. Create with the tools you have because you have everything you need in order to manifest. "Don't take life personally"

Now we have heaven sent.

""Let yourself be helped" assistance is coming your way so act on it and say yes"

" This Oracle also comes with the message that you are to trust in the things that you feel and say to others without knowing why. It moves them. You might not understand, but through trust you are allowing yourself not to overthink and censor yourself. As such you are able to become a vessel through which the spiritual gift can be passed on to others. Don't block yourself. Let life happen through you. Only benefit can come from this."

And free from judgment, free to love

" If you have been asking life for a solution to a specific difficulty you have been having, this Oracle comes with the message that a solution is in gestation right now. This situation is already being sorted out and the resolution will come to fruition very soon. Hold tight and wait for the eminent birth of that resolution."

" This Oracle also brings you a message about love. You may find that you are loving, or soon will love, in a different way. You may worry about this love, given that it defies what you have known or been taught about love. Perhaps you are becoming able to love another tremendously, even though you don't have much of a personal relationship with them. You might question if this love is real. It is real Kama it is just happening at a different level to the love and attachment you experience when you are involved in a personal relationship with someone. It is not more or less, it is just a different facet of love. It may be that you are opening up to love the planet and her creatures, including the animals, the ocean dwelling life, your own body, the trees and so on, more than before period you may feel passionately purposeful about giving your time and energy to causes that protect and nurture the Earth and her creatures. You are affirmed in this love too. The universal mother is operating through you to nurture life. She will support you in your work, so that you can continue To come from love and not become drained, depleted or lost in despair or fear of futility. Instead, you will be energised and expanded by your dedicated service to life."

" Finally, this Oracle has a message for those who may be feeling alone or lonely in a need of greater nurturing from others. You are asked to stop, relax, centre and settle into your body to feel your connection with life itself. The air in your lungs is the same as the air that moves through the trees. The water in your blood is the same water that fills the oceans and is moved by the phases of the moon. The flesh of your body is the same substance as the body of the Earth itself. The heat in your digestive system is the same fire and heat as that from the Sun. Feel this connection, then do something nice for another without agenda. Make a donation, even if just a small one, smile, say a prayer, sent out a good thought or make a wish for another. That's it. You have connected to life again and in doing so, life can connect with you. And so it shall.

And that's all for the cards but but but.

Someone (either my guide or yoongi) was like, "do a song. Do a song. Do a song." And I was like, "oki doki, sounds good.

So I asked what numbers I should try refreshing and then it hit me. The number 14 came up before the reading and it seemed a bit misplaced? So I did 14 shuffles and look what popped up

You gotta be fucking with me.

Istg these fools will actually be the death of me dude. Euphoria is so romantic and I lowkey feels like it describes a bit of what their bond must be like.

YOONGGGIIII

Anyway,

I came back to the platform to be like, "thanks homie" and it was weird bc he was practically pure energy? Like usually I visualize his energy as what his physical body looks like because it's easier to comprehend? But nope, he was just a big shimmery glob of energy.

As I was going to disconnect, a few things happened. I felt tingly and the platform was vibrating almost? So I was like, "hold on, what the fuck is this?"

And then

It hit me

"MIN YOONGI IS YOUR SOULMATE HERE??"

I could tell this fuckin asshole was smug even in his blue glob form.

The color was... blue like yoongi but also a light lavender/ pink kinda vibe. Pretty damn distinct.

I was so stoked and I thought we'd all get to chat and I could yell at his soulmate for being an elusive asshat

But Mr smug butt had different plans.

My dude dropped a little marble thing in my hand and I was like ??? And he was like, "you'll know when you need it" and I was like ?????

My guide took pity on me and said, "it's just a representation on information that you've been given but it isn't the proper time to unpack it yet"

Cool cool so like and energetic zip file that will release itself whenever it damn well pleases? Cool cool cool.

(Asshole)

Anyway, I genuinely think that my excitement of this whole situation must somehow also influence how yoongis energy handles my prodding? Like what the fuck is this marble bullshit?

To top it all off, he gives me a friendly shove off of his platform.

Thanks, buddy.

Now we are here. And as always, I'm left with more questions.

My main take away is that amay 13th through July 28th will be all the foundation and ground work and December 28th 2021 through May 10th (11th? 9th?) 2022 will be a more likely time for physical union and actual relationship stuffs.

Anyone who knows more about astrology please feel free to chime in on this whole Jupiter in Pisces bit! My understanding is super surface level!!

~~~~

That was a big boi and now my thumbs hurt real bad. Hope you were entertained by the chaos.

[wrestlezon]

liveblog containment zone for 10/18/22 aew dynamite

started a little bit late...

dalton castle cut a great promo and its a fucking shame hes gonna lose to jericho :/

best friends + oc vs death triangle

OH my guys are up first!! lmao oc holding the belt with the backpack falling to the floor. extremely stylish. i love him the worst part is that i can totally see them booking death triangle dirty and having them lose to best friends. this sucks. i actually have hope that the best friends could win. lucha bros kicking the shit outta chuck ;~; now everyones beating up rey fenix!! nooo their Special Trios Move! interrupted! nevermind i think the best friends have zero hope to win again. phew. i am at peace (by being a pessimist) KILLING orange. MURDERING him. hes caught in the DEATH TRIANGLE THEYRE CHOPPING HIM… TO DEATH!!!!!! the best friends watching orange get murdered just makes me think of goku letting gohan get his ass kicked oh theyre making a super SUPER plex a proper death triangle (human pyramid superplex) oooo pac with the bloodlust very cool. love it when chins get held lmao chuck hiding behind trent when penta approached the hammer!!! OHHH ITS HAPPENING REY FENIX WAS LIKE NO I BELIEVE IN MORALS oh man if they lose now there could be lore. hmm oh double cutter on the best friends… nevermind they pinned trent!

video promo with jon moxley and hangman page

look moxley is gonna win. unless mjf wants to really make moxley lose BAD bad in his own hometown

baker crew backstage interview

when will jamie hayter leave………..

toni storm vs hikaru shida

SHIDA!!!! i know she aint gonna win. but i like her :( im trying to pay attention to this match but my friends are talking about mjf and max caster. typical theyre gonna read this later and get mad at me. YALL are the women likers!!!!! whoa. the camera angle on that suplex pin toni wins! oh no theres baker crew violence now!!

boo baker!!! oh she got nice shoes on though saraya! is she clear to fight now huh!! that theme… riho!!!!!!!! yay!!!!!!!!! the return of riho!! oh yeah. where DID saraya and baker get off to

video promo from war(dlow + samoa)joe

i dont know these new roh kingdom guys.

backstage with FTR

its ftr! the AAA tag titles need, like, a hit of metallic spraypaint on them or something. they really do look like theyre made outta foam hey! its swerve in our glory!! yay!!!!! STEALING HIS APPLE swerve is so good. i love this misfit tag team. tony k dont ever break them up OR ELSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

backstage with jay lethal and darby allin

oh hes uh challenging him to a rematch. e_e where are they filming this? oh a loading dock LMAO ARE THEY GOING TO CHOP HIM IN HALF WITH THE SHUTTERS

in the ring! with tony schiavone and william regal

"thats pretty wild. anyway, im here with regal" oh my god mjf is here. hes moving on to feud with the next sexually charged old man hmm… what will mjf reveal now… wow! naming wwe just like that. zero fear! oooohhh is he mad at regal for embarassing him when he was green ……………… "and boy did i" "and when i finished your jaw was on the floor" MJF IS NOT BEATING THE "I FUCKED THAT OLD MAN" ALLEGATIONS dang dude too young. rip maxwell calling an email "a promo" is so funny ooooo that is CUTTING LMAO HES SO EMOTIONAL oh my god regal looks insane "catnip to old men" my friend says. well, a succubus huh i read that email every day. not because im obsessed. its because im normal, actually woooooow. ok, now lets hear it from regal oooooooooohh "if an email is all it took to get you here then you got it easy" HELL YEA OHHHH HES MAD ABOUT MJF HITTING TONY SCHIAVONE HOW DARE YOU HIT MY DEAR TONY "you hire people to do your bad work for you" "i dont need a ring to knock people out" LMAO THE CROWD GUY "KICK HIM IN THE NUTS" OHHHHH hes turning mjf honorable. i mean, still a villain, but honorable. mjf redemption hours (LMAO)

video promo of dalton castle and jericho

man i need to stop watching those road to vids if theyre just gonna play them during the show. im glad they are though, i loved this promo. if theyre gonna make dalton castle lose then they might as well give him tv cloud

backstage with the acclaimed and billy gunn

lmao they taped over the "scissor me" on the shirt… varsity athletes vs the acclaimed! titles vs trademarks!

backstage interview with bryan danielson and wheeler yuta

what is going to happen here… please keep talking about daniel garcia and get wheeler yuta jealous LMAO YES YUTA WITH THE SHADE. YUTA IS DOWN ON DANIELSON OHHHhghghHGHGHHHH!!

dalton castle vs chris jericho

yay!!!! OH DAMN HE GETS A HELL OF AN ENTRANCE swagger levels are off the charts he has so many boys. a whole twink staircase or twonks. twunks? he dug DEEP in those trunks for that i cant focus on this match because we're too busy talking about mjf and regal. dang ok we restarted the match because another friend joined dalton castle coming out of his bird cage… his championship sequins!! omg!!! chris jericho being shadowed by hager in that stupid fucking hat lmao its too bad hager sucks and not in a funny or cool or endearing way LMAO god i gotta get a screencap of jericho's face getting flipped off oh lmao that was cute, his boys following him around the ring as they hype up the crowd ooooh these show announcements… they comin back to cali huh… lmao i love it when you can hear jericho yell in surprise. getting thrown off the corner WHOA DALTON that was an insane charge-stumble-out-of-the-ring move LMAO hager caught in the BOYS ATTACK DAMAGE ZONE oh my god he's hulking out over the hat nooo not he walls of jericho! dalton castle your back!!! oh phew he got out. yeah finish move him! oh nooo hes in the walls of jericho!!!!!!! rope break! SASSING AUBREY!!!!!!! JERICHO NO >:( ooo big suplex by dalton lmfao taz "so whaaat if he destroys the honor in ring of honor!" I KNOW DALTON IS NOT GONNA WIN BUT THEY KEEP GIVING ME HOPE!!!!!!!!!!!! if anything jericho is gonna drop the belt at final battle >:/ there it is u_u oh yeah theyre right. he DIDNT cheat… even… ring of honor commentators!! NO LOOK OUT IAN RICCABONI!!!!!!! oh its jerry lynn to talk some sense NOOOO JERICHO YOU CANT THATS WRESTLING LEGEND JERRY LYNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! a true monster lmfao even taz is like "WHOA nvm i dont support piledriving jerry lynn wtf"

excalibur announces the upcoming matches

hmm not much for me to look forward to... RIHO AND JAMIE HATYER!!!!!!!!

backstage with jade's crew

omg jade is MAD mad tony khan get me my belt or i will hold this whole fucking show hostage

hangman page vs jon moxley

mjf holding his chip like a baby blanket hangman starting out before the ring huh in the crowd already? LMAO HANGMAN WAIT damn doing backflips off scaffolding onto concrete???? jesus wow theyre doing the whole walk through the crowd huh lmao ok every time a wrestler sits themselves down to get beaten up in a folding chair it makes me laugh NOW the match has started there is too many things going on. blood! blood! blood! blood! MJF IS MISSING… this is a good fight. im too busy watching it. lmao schiavone so bitter about mjf. "i hope your words regal chased him out of the building" whoa hangman's flip out of that german suplex, nice match end… huh… i dont.. THINK this is a shoot injury………… we've been pausing so much and we also started late, i cant even look at the clock to tell how much time left in the show there is… ………… oh now excalibur talking about matches? oh… theyre buying time… oh no… he got shoot injured for sure… oh… hangman… :( taz is so concerned too he is NOT joking around. makes sense knowing what happened to him and his neck jesus moxley is a true professional. i dont think there are many people who'd be able to cut a fucking promo after that theyre going through with things? keep it going i guess whoa theyre getting TWO shits per show? mic feedback-- moxley making jokes??? at a time like this even! ;~; well… i suspected that the belt would only change hands during a ppv, and with full gear coming up… so this makes sense

[xtrashmammalstefx]

Stubborn Asshole (A Zak Bagans x Reader SMUT)

WARNINGS: Smut, language, possession

Special Thanks: To @xcazzax​ for being an awsome reader and source of inspiration. I couldn’t do this without you girly. 🥰

I love Aaron like a brother, don’t get me wrong, but DAMN HIM FOR BRINGING SUCH AN ASSHOLE INTO MY LIFE!

Douchey McGee: Hey Aaron said to message u.

He said: Get the fuck up Y/N!

Me: Tell him I said thnx and

and 2 not have the douche do

his dirty work.

Douchey McGee: Well fuck u 2 Y/N.

I sighed and crawled out of my hotel bed. We’d flown in late the previous night and I was still exhausted. I showered and got dressed in my ripped black skinny jeans, my black GAC shirt, and combat boots. I grabbed my hoodie and purse on the way out. Downstairs in the attached restaurant the rest of the crew were gathered for breakfast and much needed coffee.

“Morning gorgeous,” Aaron greeted.

“Fuck off Goodwin, I haven’t even had my coffee yet,” I said taking my seat beside him. “And by the way since when is boss man your own personal secretary.”

“And here I thought you didn’t know me as anything but Douche McGee, douche, or my personal favorite: Stubborn asshole son of a bitch.” Zak chimed in.

“Good morning to you too Satan,” I rolled my eyes.

I swear ever since we met Zak has made it his life mission to push my buttons in any way he can. But unfortunately for this psychotic fuck, two can play that game.

“Huh that’s original,” Zak continued.

I rolled my eyes and ordered an omelet with coffee. “So you gonna tell me when you decided to make boss man your bitch?” I asked Aaron.

“Well I figured I’ve been the bitch long enough so…” Aaron said.

“Dude, since when have I ever treated you like a bitch?” Zak asked.

“Every time you forced him to stay in a fucked up room by himself during an investigation like a fucking sadist?” I pointed out.

“Oh...right…” Zak said looking like he felt a tinge of guilt.

“Does that mean I’m a bitch too since he’s been doing the same thing to me lately?” Billy chimed in.

“Unfortunately,” I said just as my breakfast arrived arrived. “Oh, thanks.” I said to the waitress.

“Only you can go from bitchy to bubbly in zero seconds flat,” Zak said.

“Fuck you too, Bagans,” I muttered taking a bite of my omelet.

“Not in this life babe,” Zak muttered taking a sip of his coffee.

It continued like that even in the car on the way to the days location: Bly Manor. According to our sources Bly Manor was built in the 1800’s by Charles Bly, an Irish immigrant who made a fortune selling liquor and tobacco. By the time of the Civil War he decided to try his hand at weapons manufacturing which earned him enough to break ground on his dream house. He lived in the manor with his family. His wife Athena, and his daughter Josephine.

It said that on a sunny afternoon while do work in the Manor’s yard a man by the name of Bishop Wiley showed up and shot him dead. Supposedly Wiley’s son Robert was a soldier in the war and was killed by the very guns Charles helped build.

Charles has since been purported sighted walking the manor grounds. His wife Athena has been seen playing the piano, and wandering the halls. As for Josephine well… she was the most famous spirit of all.

“Josephine has been seen on the balcony of the Red Room,” explained our tour guide as we interviewed her. “The story goes that Josephine had met and fallen in love with a man at a nearby farm. And just before they were due to be married he left to fight in the war. She promised to wait for him there until his return. Hopeful that they could still marry and have a family. Sadly the man lost his life in Gettysburg. Charles felt so horrible he felt the need to keep it from her. So she continued to wait. And continues to wait to this very day.”

My heart ached for Josephine. It’s a whole other level of hell to lose someone so dear… I damn near jumped when I felt his hand on my shoulder.

“Hey, you okay?” Zak asked.

“Y-Yeah, I’m fine,” I said before following the tour guide.

We eventually took a break for lunch and then got ready for the investigation. Unlike most of the crew I made it a habit of carrying a small black backpack. I was just stuffing a recorder, spirit box, and MEL Meter when someone pat my shoulder.

“Hey are you sure you’re feeling okay?” Zak asked again.

“Yeah,” I said. “I’m good, um, why the niceties?”

“I may be an asshole sometimes but I do feel for people now and then,” he said.

“Even me?” I arched an eyebrow at him. Before he could answer Aaron barged in needing to grab a spare lens for the camera.

We continued prepping in silence and then slowly but eventually the sun went down and moon shined bright.

Aaron, Zak, and I went in together. We worked together as a group for a while before (in true Zak Bagans fashion) we split up.

“Y/N I want you to stay up here for a while and see if Josephine will communicate with you,” Zak said.

“Alright,” I said stepping out onto Josephine’s balcony. Zak and Aaron disappeared through the Red Room door and I took out my recorder. “Josephine, are you here?” I started. “If so do you think you could answer a few questions for me? I promise you I mean no harm. Just speak into this little device for me.”

I felt a chill in the air but continued. “Why are you still waiting for him?” I asked. “Don’t you think he’s waiting for you on the other side?”

I suddenly felt an overwhelming feeling of sadness and anxiety. I slid down to the ground and then... He promised me. I kept thinking for some odd reason. He promised...he promised we’d go...he promised on the stars...he promised we’d be together.

The thoughts kept coming, and I don’t know when it started but I only realized I was crying when I felt someone shake me violently. “Y/N TALK TO ME DAMMIT!!!”

Zak knelt in front of me looking freaked. “D-Don’t ever leave me,” I cried. “Please don’t ever leave me.”

“Josephine leave her alone, please,” Zak asked. “I know what happened to you was cruel and unfair but that doesn’t mean she should suffer like this.” Call me crazy but Zak actually sounded kind of pissed. There was another chill and he knelt beside me again. “I’m here  sweetheart…” He whispered brushing my cheek with his hand. “I’m here.”

I looked up at him and saw a face that was not his. His hair was chocolate brown and barely touched his shoulders, his eyes the same. My heart took off in joy and I threw my arms around him. He squeezed me before pulling back and taking my face in his hands. “Promise not to disappear on me again?” I asked.

“I promise,” he muttered before bringing his lips to mine. We kissed passionately as though it was a long time coming. After a while it felt like a weight lifted off me and my legs became limp. “WHOA!”

Zak caught me. It was for sure him this time. I was suddenly more aware of things...more awake. “Zak...what? What happened?”

“I dunno,” he said. “But I’m getting you the fuck out of here.”

He scooped me up in his arms and carried me all the way to the GAC van.

“You know you didn’t have to carry me right?”

“Says the girl who just nearly passed out on me,” Zak said setting me down in the back of the van.

“Um Zak did you want us to edit out the last bit of her footage or..?” Billy asked awkwardly.

“Edit it out? Why?” Zak asked. Blushing furiously Billy replayed the footage from the night vision cam we had facing the balcony. It showed me slowly crumbling and then…

“Oh sweet fucking Jesus,” I groaned as Zak and I started making out on screen.

“Uh...yeah I don’t think we need to uh-*cough*-show that,” Zak said turning back to me. “Are you, uh, gonna be okay?”

“Um...yeah I think so,” I said not entirely meeting his eye. “You-uh-you go ahead. I’m just gonna chill with Billy the rest of the night.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. Now go before I drag you back in by your balls,” I threatened.

“Oh yeah you’re gonna be fine,” he said turning his back on me.

“You know you two are actually kinda hot together,” Billy said.

“What? Are you high? Zak and I can barely stand each other,” I said.

“Bull-fucking-shit Y/N,” Billy laughed. “We all can see there is insane tension going on between you. We just don’t get why you guys haven’t done anything about it.”

“What are we the hot gossip going around the office or something?”

“I mean, if this almost-porno is anything to go by...then yeah.”

“Billy I swear to God if I catching you jerking off to that—.”

“You’ll cut my nuts off I know,” he finished for me. “Besides I would never in hell jerk off to my best friend and his girl. It’s too weird.”

“I’m not his girl,” I snapped at him.

“Whatever you say Y/N,” Billy laughed. “Now did you wanna review this evidence with me or..?”

And so I did.

Once the investigation ended we packed up, caught a few minutes sleep then made our way back to Vegas.

Billy, Jay, and Aaron were dropped off first. Then it was just me and Zak.

Aaron: Try not to kill Zak please.

Me: No promises.

Zak then pulled up to my place.

“Are we never gonna talk about it?” I asked as he parked.

“What’s there to say?” he asked. “It-It was a freak incident. We-we weren’t ourselves.”

“True you were actually nice for once,” I said sarcastically.

Zak glared at me. “Go fuck yourself, Y/N.”

“Fuck me yourself you coward,” I blurted out. “I mean...um...fuck!” I sighed and stepped out of the car. I had just unlocked my door when…

“Y/N!” I turned around and saw Zak running up to me.

“Wha―” I was cut off by Zak slamming his lips to mine.

He kissed me hard, as though he was relieving an ache deep within his heart. I kissed back and clumsily opened my door. Zak picked me up, wrapping my legs around his waist and carried me to my bedroom. He placed me on the bed and I reached up to pull his shirt off. I tossed it aside and eventually more articles of clothing followed.

Zak laid me back on the bed and started pecking a trail of kisses all the way down to my heat. A moan escaped my lips as he kissed and sucked on me. “HO-HOLY SHIT!”

To say Zak knew what he was doing would be an understatement. He didn’t stop eating me until I was writhing beneath him. “Z-ZAK!” My back arched and my toes curled up in the most powerful orgasm of my life.

He crawled back up to me, smirking. “Not much of an asshole anymore, am I?”

“Oh shut up,” I brought my lips back to his as I ran my hand up and down his length which like the rest of him was thick and hard. I suddenly felt him move my hand before he reached down and placed himself at my entrance. He kissed me once more before pushing in. “FUCK! How the fuck have you been single this long?”

“Demons tends to be excellent cock blocks,” Zak said as he started to thrust. “Lucky for us, they tend to stay away from you.”

“R-Really?”

He grunted then nodded. Despite his big, tough, persona Zak was actually really sensual and passionate in bed. He kept his thrusts gentle (probably because he knew his above average size could inflict some damage if he wasn’t careful) until I urged him to go faster and harder. After a while he flipped us over so that I was on top. I rode him hard, and Zak, being a gentleman, helped me out by thrusting up into me as I did.

The tension began building up inside me. “Fuck...Zak I-I think I’m gonna…” It hit me like a wave. I tightened around him, arching my back, and damn near screaming his name.

Zak flipped us over again and continued thrusting until he grew sloppy. I suddenly felt him twitch inside me as he cursed and groaned. His body shuttered as he painted my womb with his seed. Finally he collapsed beside me, both of us breathless.

“Wow,” I said.

“I know,” Zak said.

Once my breathing was under control I turned to him. “So...what now?”

He looked over at me.

“I guess we just be together,” he said. “It’s kind of what you do when you’re insanely in love with someone.”

“You’re in love with me?” I asked.

“I’ve always been in love with you,” he smiled. “Ever since we met...I just didn’t want the spirits in my life to hurt you so I decided to keep you away.”

“What changed?”

“Besides that they for some reason stay away from you?” I nodded. “I was tired of letting them get in the way of what I want. I was tired of being away from you.” He draped his arm over my waist. “I love you.” He muttered.

“I love you too,” I said pecking him on his swollen lips.

We spent almost every day together after that. It’s been a year and we are still together. Life was the same for the most part. We still investigated places, while not in bed or spending time with each other. The guys were relieved to see us together (at last) until our PDA became a little too much for them to handle. Oh and there was one other difference as well…

“Y/N BAGANS COME GET YOUR MAN HE’S BEING FUCKING TERRIFYING AGAIN!” Aaron shouted at me through the walkie.

“What happened to having the preggo investigator hang back all night?” I asked rubbing my stomach. Zak made everyone swear not to let me into the buildings with malicious spirits and demons.

“Y/N please,” Aaron begged.

I sighed and looked down. “Aaron Nicholas Bagans for the love of god don’t be a stubborn asshole like your daddy.”

With that I exited the van and went to save the love of my life.

[finleycannotdraw]

Guess what? I’m re-binge-reading Good Omens. And here are some Obervations that I forgot about and some things I might put in fics. Also things I found funny. Basically my dumb commentary on the book.

Crowley actually flees Sister Mary. He doesn’t saunter vaguely away. He flees.

Ligur is rather more thoughtful than he’s portrayed in the show

Anathema likes to read about herself, and her teachers are confused because she spells words like Agnes Nutter

Crowley apologizes

By page 41, it is mentioned at least twice that Aziraphale and Crowley Do Not choose each other’s company for any reason other than that they are constants, that they have an Arrangement, and that they are Friends because being Enemies got boring.

Aziraphale blushes!!!!!!

The Drunk Scene is fuckin hilarious and it’s actually a lot longer than it is in the show, and really you ought to read it. (Book pages 47-50)

My mom (who has a PhD in human development) would probably like to talk to Crowley about upbringing because they seem to agree on how important it is

War has always looked 25, and had a vulture that died of fatty degeneration

Pollution is very cleverly compared to actual pollution

Warlock has Kermit the frog overalls, and Nanny Ashtoreth is described as someone who “advertises unspecified but strangely explicit services in certain magazines”. The tutors are present for about four paragraphs. Warlock is good at math and likes banana flavored bubblegum.

Crowley has a slice of angel cake. Aziraphale eats it. Aziraphale also eats deviled eggs. Hm.

Crowley calls Aziraphale angel casually enough to suggest he’s been doing it for a long time

Some girl at Warlock’s party calls Aziraphale a f*ggot

Crowley glares suspiciously at a gerbil. It is suggested that Hell has, in the past, sent hell-gerbils in place of hellhounds.

“Oh dear,” muttered Aziraphale, not swearing with the practiced ease of one who has spent six thousand years not swearing, and who wasn’t going to start now.

Adam and his friends play in a place called The Pit, where shopping carts go to die, apparently

Crowley is the first one to mention sides in the book!??!? Also Crowley goes on about how humans are more evil than Hell (but he calls himself evil—is he calling himself human already?)

Aziraphale yells “get off the road, you clown!”

“What’s a velvet underground?” *love confession???* “you wouldn’t like it”

Aziraphale is a bit rude to Crowley in the “flashes of love” scene and Crowley is less panicked about it

Crowley glares at the Bentley and it fixes itself

Anathema’s bike is called Phaeton

COULD THEY ACT ANY MORE MARRIED OH MY GOD

Aziraphale speaks like. Like ugh. “FlOUndeR on tHe rOcKS of inEquiTY”

“Thirty seconds later someone shot both of them. With incredible accuracy.” *cuts to a random pleasant story about Mary Hodges* *cuts back to where Aziraphale has fallen into a rhododendron and Crowley licks the paint before he knows it’s paint* dumbasses

Crowley does not slam Aziraphale into the wall

Crowley is actually pretty impatient and doesn’t argue with Aziraphale when he’s worried

“Nothing but dust and fundamentalists” “that was nasty” “sorry, couldn’t help it”

When the radio sings “Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me,” Crowley sings “for me” and then screams

Crowley asks Aziraphale if he’ll keep in touch, and Aziraphale doesn’t say tickety-boo, and then Crowley says “right” and feels very alone

the international express man is small and has glasses, and wears green woolen socks

The sword, which turns out to be Aziraphale’s, is described as having an aura of hatred and menace, which makes me think of how it could’ve gotten that aura from Heaven or from humanity or from War...

In the book Pepper has red hair and freckles, which makes it a cool comparison to War’s appearance and the defeat of War

Adam is excellent at slouching, apparently

Occasionally, as Aziraphale reads the book, he would very nearly swear

“He wouldn’t have said ‘that’s weird’ if a flock of sheep had cycled past playing violins.”

“If you had told him there were children starving in Africa he would’ve been flattered that you’d noticed.”

“...that he was English, that he was intelligent, and that he was gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide.” (151)

Wensleydale watches David Attenborough programs

Shadwell’s voice is described as “the color of an old raincoat” and seems to fake smoking cigarettes

Aziraphales cocoa is moldy and solidified by the time he calls Arthur Young, and has a thin layer of dust on himself too

Newt says that the walls look like nicotine and the floor looks like cigarette ash, and he suspects both are, actually, coated with these substances

Newt looks a bit like Clark Kent, and people seem to like Shadwell for some reason, much to his annoyance.

Aziraphale calls Shadwell “dear boy” on the phone

Agnes Nutter called God a daft old fool #goals

Adam is wayyyy too good at video games

Smelling Anathema’s perfume makes Newt uncomfortable

Adam suggests that Pepper ought to have Russia cause of her red hair (huh)

Anathema and Newt actually have decent conversations?? Like?? Show??? C’mon, man. The show kinda butchered their relationship.

Trees, apparently, make a ‘vvrooooommm’ sound when they grow very fast

“He suspected that Crowley was from the Mafia, or the underworld, although he would have been surprised how right he nearly was.” Shadwell also thought Aziraphale was a Russian spy. Wow, Shadwell.

Aziraphale calls Crowley and actually says “shut up” to him, and then when the answering machine beeps, he tells Crowley to “stop making noises” and then he swears for the first time ever.

The fuckin’ footnote on page 227

“A sleek computer was the sort of thing Crowley felt that the sort of human he tried to be would have.” I like the word choice here. He’s not pretending to be a human, he’s trying to be one. That’s a really important distinction.

It never actually says what Crowley does to his plants.

Crowley’s flat is very white. Wow, Crowley. It just looks dark because of the lighting. Heaven imagery and symbolism out my ears, goddammit.

Why does Hell say Crowley’s name so much when talking to him?? Honestly, I think that’s an intentional dig at his chosen name, using it in their speech to scare him. Wow, Hell. (And wow, Finn, excellent sentence)

Whenever the book says something is shaped like something, it definitely isn’t that thing. “man-shaped” “dog-shaped” “car-shaped”... makes it pretty obvious they aren’t men, dogs, or cars, huh.

The code to Crowley’s safe is 4004. The year he “slithered onto this stupid, marvelous planet”... and the year he met Aziraphale, of course. Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt, Crowley, my dude.

Crowley consideres sticking Hastur into his car until he turns into Freddie Mercury but then decides even he isn’t that cruel

Actual text that I feel like nobody really agrees with: “Madame Tracy was by many yardsticks quite stupid”

“Do I look like I run a bookshop?” “...imagine me out of uniform, sir, and what kind of man would you see before you? Honestly?” “A prat.”

I’m crying. The fucking bookshop fire scene made me fucking cry. I’m literally crying.

“...on all fours in the blazing bookshop, Crowley cursed Aziraphale, and the ineffable plan, and Above, and Below.” “The police and firemen looked at him, saw the expression on his face, and stayed exactly where they were.” “...a crack of thunder so loud it hurt....” *the sound of Finley sobbing into their cat*

The shortest biker in the cafe thing is 6′2, what the fuck

War, Famine, Pollution, and Pop Trivia 1962-1979

“Pollution removed his helmet and shook out his long white hair. He had taken over when Pestilence, muttering about penicillin, had retired in 1936. If only the old boy had known what opportunities the future had held.” HMMMMMMMMMMM

“There were no bitches in Hell either.” I know it’s talking about female dogs, but I rather thought Hell was full of bitches.

“Why are you talking like a poofter?” “Ah. Australia.”

“gOsh, aM i on teLEviSiON?” (Basically Aziraphale gets passionate about stuff and likes to talk).

Crowley is actually an optimist and doesn’t dwell too much on how sucky the world is. He doesn’t go get smashed in a bar. He just finds Aziraphale’s notes in the book and heads to Tadfield. And also, his new pair of sunglasses just... materializes out of his eyes. And he likes to whistle.

“Death and Famine and War and Pollution continued biking to Tadfield. And Grievous Bodily Harm, Cruelty to Animals, Things Not Working Properly Even After You’ve Given Them A Good Thumping But Secretly No Alcohol Lager, and Really Cool People traveled with them.”

“on top of the pile a rather large octopus waved a languid tentacle at them. The sergeant resisted the temptation to wave back.” Honestly dude, if an octopus waved at me I’d wave back.

Wait Agnes was apparently talking to Shadwell and not God when she said yowe daft old foole. I dunno

Madame Tracy: You old silly. Shadwell: 

Aziraphale does not know how to get rid of demons. Canonically. “Had never done other to get rid of demons than to hint to them very strongly that he, Aziraphale, had some work to be getting on with, and wasn’t it getting late? And Crowley always got the hint.”

The road to Hell is paved with frozen door to door salesmen, apparently. The question is where it is, because the demons always seem to just stem out of the ground.

“Heigh ho,” said Anthony Crowley, and just drove anyway. I love this sentence during that scene. 

I bet Hastur gets really mad whenever he hears Aziraphale’s voice from now on

Crowley isn’t breathing the entire burning Bentley scene

ADAM. SAID. “But I reckon you can make your own side” AND WE FUCKIN IGNORED IT?

The temperature above the M25 was simultaneously 700ºC and -140ºC which makes me think of something I read about magenta not being real. The M25 is magenta.

I feel like “Agnes” is just going to become an inside joke between Anathema and Newt at this point, and it will drive Crowley insane because he knows who she is but somehow still doesn’t get the joke.

I’m six inches taller than R.P. Tyler, and apparently according to the back sleeve of the book jacket, I’m very similar in height to Neil Gaiman

R.P. Tyler thought Shadwell was a ventriloquist’s dummy, and then sees cows doing somersaults

“That’s terrific. Much obliged,” said Crowley. — “Funny weather we’re having, isn’t it?” “Is it? I hadn’t noticed.” “Probably because your car is on fire.” .... Also the fact that Crowley looks like a young man which I find interesting.

“The Four Button-Pressers of the Apocalypse”

“Where is Armageddon, anyway?” “I’ve always meant to look that up.” “There’s an Armageddon, Pennsylvania”

Famine is the one that says “that’s one big avocado”, and also, I find it interesting that War, more than once, talks about love. (All is fair in love and war much?)

Anathema threatens the guard with a stick, pretending it’s a gun

Aziraphale, of course, asks Crowley to sort it out because he, Aziraphale, is “the nice one” and then proceeds to sort it out himself. Because of course he does. Because what else could he possibly do.

I just ADORE THIS BOOK OKAY

I’M PROBABLY GOING TO READ IT AGAIN IN A MONTH

Aziraphale and Crowley are so fuckin married I can’t

[apparentlyaswarmofbees]

I've been asking around this one question for a few people now, because I like hearing what people have to say about it...

So I wouldn't mind it if you shared a list on who's your favourite (from Most to Least) from the Obey Me! Crew (Brothers & Formally Undatables)...

Also, please feel free to ramble on about why you placed them in each space...

O-oh dear-

First off, you spoil an infodumper like me too much lol (I am happy sfjsjjdjn) and I am going to go overboard (and changing the order of things) for my own pleasure.

And so...

Second off...

Gladly

Here is My List of LEAST to MOST Favorite of The Obey Me Boys ^^

That I just did on spot because I didn't have one ready because it's hard for me to rate the characters as they all have their traits and even their flaws add something good to the character but I'll be dammed if I don't enjoy deep frying my brain for fun.

Please take note I am taking this literally and all characters in here are FAVORITES, just some will be more and some less, which mean I LIKE ALL OF THEM. Yes, I have changed my opinion on a certain two characters I have said to not like, and I am not ashamed to say I was incorrect.

So let's start this off with the right foot shall we?

#12 | Diavolo

He is still infuriating I won't deny that. And I won't pity him though he is a tragic character that is so lonely he overrates any kind of affection, that doesn't know how to interact with others without exagerating, that has no one to give an oposing opinion because of his status and so it's increasingly hard for him to learn to make good decisions, and with his goal to unite the realms I could almost say he is naive. He's a bit of a puppy always wanting some pets, but as a not dog person, I don't have enough in me to be always playing, so to me an overly needy puppy can end up getting annoying, though of course, I can't help it but at least give it a few pets before going my way.

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#11 | Simeon

Yes in the end I actually liked him all along but was just in denial after I thought about it. Simeon is a good character, he's a dick even though he's an angel and he doesn't bother to be any different, he definetelly has his own set of rules he follows and I believe he would be a Chaotic Good just like me. He's well made. And as much as he is pretty unlikeable, the mystery, the questions, the fact that he has always been the same we just didn't get to interact with him much to see it, to have a naturally asshole character put down some of his walls to help us even if part out of possible self interest. And of course he's also fun. Simeon is charming, and I have come to appreciate all of him.

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#10 | Luke

A kid. A brat and a tsundere. I Absolutely love the character development and it's extremelly adorable. He's now officially our guardian angel and I love that. He was just a prick that I rolled my eyes so hard whenever I encountered him in the game and now he's just a lil' bratty brother that is fun to tease and squish the cheeks off. He's a really nice kid in the end, just previously ignorant, but still nice because he was willing to learn and change despise saying he didn't want to. I personally can understand Luke as I was pretty alike as a kid. Again, he's a nice kid I would gladly buy some balloons and cotton candy for.

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#9 | Barbatos

The number 1 buttler, he's just, a good dude l o l. He has his distance from everyone due to his position but that doesn't make him any less interesting. He is mysterious and powerful and yet he feels, so chill. He's also fun and actually has a pretty soft personality in which he knows exactly when to switch off to strict. He's a character I respect and wish existed in real life so I could be friends with (╥﹏╥).

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#8 | Solomon

Shady sorcerer is actually a pretty good guy though mildly insane. He is actually responsable (and takes it pretty seriously seeing he's basically the representative of the human realm). He's kind though again, mildly insane, and diligent. He may have terrible food but the fact he does it with good intentions is pretty adorable, he just likes to follow his instincts and be spontaneous because he likes new and exciting things. He probably has quite a bit of angst to him due to his not only immortality in not aging but also by not being able to be killed but even so it feels that, contrary to how many human immortals end, he still hasn't lost the light in his eyes and can still enjoy things and enjoy being alive, and that is most likely thanks to other immortal/long living beings such as demons.

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#7 | Lucifer

Yep. Lucifer is actually a really fucking great character, he's fond of his family, hard worker to the point of destroying himself, self punisher, elegant, pretty af, cute at times. But not exactly my most favorable cup of tea. Seeing I can see through his bullshit all his posessiveness, all his pettiness, all his actions just becomes ridiculous and annoying. And theres also a problem with the fact we always end up submiting to him, I don't want that. For every time he disrespects me I want him to kneel and kiss my feet. His pride collides with my own, and his decisions do too. But even so he is very reliable and so he has my respect for that, I do want to hug him and tell him he deserves nice things and that he can rest now this is not the war anymore you don't have to bow down to anyone anymore you didn't doom your brothers but freed them instead, but then again he makes bad decisions because he has zero braincells for emotional intelligence and that pisses me off and makes me just want to yeet him off a cliff. Yeah Lucifer, I would gladly kick you in the balls with ♡°.•love•.°♡.

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#6 | Leviathan

Surprising is it not? But it's true, I often focus on Levi due to him not only being pretty alike to me but also because he's related to many things I have been familiar with since I was born: animes and games. His anxiousness is relatable, the outcastness is relatable, the awkwardness is relatable, the obsession is relatable, the references are relatable, the infodumping is relatable. He's very relatable to me, but not my most favorite, and all because of his envy. He's a guilt tripper, and though I am long immune to it in real life due to extreme exposure to it from my family, it still is enough for his rank to go down. I still love him though, but mostly as the character that represents the thing I am most familiar with in life: myself.

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#5 | Beelzebub

Big puppy, he's the type of guy who will talk to plants. He has big and strong hands that could crush anything and yet he will do his best to handle some things gently. He's chill and non judgemental, loyal to the core. Once you win him over, you win him over, he would die for you. He is purposely childish at times and it's cute. He is amazing. I wish I could enjoy eating like he does. He's the only character I truly feel hurt for, as he is deeply inflicted by survivor's guilt and it just pains me I can't comfort him because he isn't real ಥ‿ಥ

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#4 | Belphegor

Hoh boy. The brat. The fandom itself is pretty divided on their liking of Belphie and it's understandable lol. But I personally understand Belphie. To hide hurt behind anger, hate and spite, to turn to agression to prove a point but you end up just fucking up. But the guilt and wish to fix things can lead one to giving themselves up, and so it becomes a constant battle of getting close but not too close for the sake of both parties involved. I get this boy more than I wish I ever did, and that's why he's high on the ranking. And because he's cute ngl.

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#3 | Satan

H o h b o y, another one that reminds me of myself, only it's the aftermath of the above where one bottles up all their negative feelings because being emotional is not being rational and who the fuck even wants to not be rational. Where you have no fucking idea who you are because all you know is to stomp your feet and scream for the sake of making an statement but that just proved all your enemies a point so now you turn to smarts to prove yourself. To make others angry, to make them frustrated and infuriated with your knowledge because you want to prove yourself, be reconized for who you are, to be someone and also, hopefully, change other people's ways, to make them understand they are wrong because you deep down actually want to get along with them. Yeah, Satan is high on the list, and it's also because he likes detectives uwu.

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#2 | Asmodeus

What a fucking icon he is I love him okay. It frustrates me when people use cheating as a angst prompt for him as he's obviously someone who just isn't made for monogamy, and he's pretty honest and I feel he would have nothing to hide and would talk it all out with all his partners. He's a sweetheart that works hard on daily basis and hour after hour to mantain an image, he likes the attention, he wants to be loved. If anyone mildly self centered ever told me 'I love you as much as I love myself' I would marry them on spot. Asmo is just incredibly sweet and I love all his affection and respect him for all the work he does to make a good impression and look up to that self confidence even though most of it is actually just him trying to convince himself. Also perfect example off gender is an ilusion lol.

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#1 | Mammon

Yep, our number 1, The Great Mammon, the most lovable dumbass that has been by our side from the start though with a bit of whining. This man is perfect. He has incredible self control over his powers, and as someone who used to be an angel to be able to use money all you want bro. I wouldn't feel bad either. He's our protector from start to end to the point he focuses on us instead of the queen in the Dame event. He isn't stupid just has selective focus just like me! And all the people with ADHD and many other neurodivergents. When he wants something he does is perfectly and diligently, he just needs the right push at the right time. He's the most good of all demons and even angels and he loves all his brothers deeply, he is always there to support everyone to the point of even allowing himself to be the punching bag for the sake of them not turning too much on one another. He was literally our first SSR card, our first call, our first pact, our first and the best. He IS great, truly.